#we all ache and we all wait and that's why we're alive

[anundyingfidelity]

AFFECTION — Soldier Boy

Summary: During a mission, Soldier Boy receives a hug from you unexpectedly. He likes it.

Pairing: Soldier Boy/Ben x female supe!reader.

Word count: 0.9k

Warnings: canon violence and language, reader is kinda hurted, descriptions of blood and stuff, AU where Ben is working with the team on missions (which is what should've happened on the show btw), Soldier Boy being Soldier Boy lmao, Ben and reader are totally opposites and I live for that. Based on this post.

Note: soooo I'm still making some arrangements to my Soldier Boy long fic and instead I have this short drabble in the meantime. Hope you enjoy it hehe.

the boys/jackles tags: @k-slla

(if anyone would like to be added to my tags just tell me^^)

☕ if you like my writing, support me with a ko-fi !

GEN MASTERLIST!

You groanned, feeling the hard wall hit against your back. It was hard to believe but you thought probably you wouldn't go out of this alive. Your body ached and not even your strenght could stop this guy.

Fucking Butcher, why did you have to follow him to suicide again? Just a couple of cunts, he said. But he forgot to mention they had a weird improved dosis of V injected.

You fell to the ground as the man walked towards you. He was extremely tall and well-buff. No sense the Compound V on his system made him better, or at least that's what he thought. He was tossed to the ground by your side, and you crawled to the corner of the small room.

The distance was not enough to let you run away. You stayed there, watching Soldier Boy's big frame over the man. He used his shield, beting him to death and destroying his face and neck during the process. You were so damn sure his loud groans of pain would remain on your mind at least for a couple of days.

"Fucking pussy," the old man said, wipping some blood off his face. He got on his feet ungracefully and grabbed his shield back. He turned to look at you, still sitting on the floor. "You okay?"

You nodded. "Yeah."

He held you a bloody hand, which you took to stand up. There was an akward silence as you and Ben left the small room, you followed him around the dirty basement, filled with lifeless bodies and fluids on the ground, to meet with Butcher and Hughie.

"Guess those were all," Butcher announced.

"I have the remaining dosis," you took the tube from the pocket of your pants and showed them with a smile on your face. "Was the last one."

"Excellent," Butcher grabbed it and tossed it to Hughie, who saved the tube on a bag.

"We made it out, huh," you mumbled.

"Well, we're still down here, so," Hughie shrugged and three pairs of eyes narrowed at him. "What?"

"Just think positively, for once," you pleaded with a fake sharp tone. "Isn't that hard, y'know."

Ben rolled his eyes.

"We're on a fucking shithole, the kid's right. Let's go now before any of you fuck this up," he ordered and passed by between Butcher and Hughie, hitting his shoulder intentionally in the process.

You quickly followed behind his long soldier strides. "Wait!"

Soldier Boy scoffed and closed his eyes slowly only to open them again. You stood on his way with a big smile and wide eyes. Bruises and blood adorned your face and neck, your clothes were also splattered with dry blood and dirt after killing those clandestine stupid supes on an undercover mission at night, and still you acted like nothing had happened. He stood in place, with Hughie and Butcher standing behind expecting what the fuck you'd be doing this time. Sometimes he thought you were so fucking annoying.

"The fuck you want?"

You opened your lips to say something but nothing came out. Once you closed them, you beamed again and closed the distance between him and you. You wrapped your arms around his strong waist and rested your grubby check against his chest. He tensed visibly under your hug and after a moment you pulled away, your hands behind your back with a shy smile. Hughie and Butcher were clearly holding back a good laugh. They knew better not to mock Soldier Boy, not yet though.

Ben blinked a couple of times, trying to process what happened.

"What the fuck was that?"

You giggled. "Affection."

He wrinkled his nose. "Disgusting."

You gasped and faked sadness on your voice. "Why? I was just saying 'thank you for saving my ass'."

"It's fucking nothing," he rolled his eyes and started to walk again to guide the team outside, with the other two men with playful smirks on their faces following behind.

"Ben!" you quickly caught his pace to stand by his side. "Thank you, okay? Probably you don't like physical contact but I do. And this is how I show others that I care about them and that I'm thankful. I also give hugs because I like them and–"

"Shh!" Ben raised his hand, suddenly stopping his tracks by the end of the stairs that'd lead you outside. He turned and looked at you with that grumpy face of his. "I said you're welcome, sweetheart. Now we need to go, you can talk to me about your hugs shit later."

He pointed to Hughie and Butcher. "Now, you, cocksuckers, go up."

Butcher grinned, going first. "Sure, cap."

"You shut up," Soldier Boy warned, Hughie gulped and nodded, and made his way up on the stairs.

You stood there, with a smile on your lips. Always that fucking, idiotic, stupid smile, even after hard missions like the one you just had. It was like if you were the only one who didn't seem scared of him or anything else. Sure, you were a supe and a smart asset on the team. But still, a very peculiar lady through his eyes.

He sighed and rolled his eyes. Once Butcher and Hughie were out of sight he finally talked.

"Do it again."

"Excuse me?"

"The stupid hug, do it again."

You raised your eyebrows, eyes bright as you realized his request. "Really?!"

"God, woman. Do I need to fucking repeat my—?"

His words were cut by your strong hug. You crashed against his frame so hard he lost balance for a bit. He was certainly surprised by how warm your hug it actually felt. You angled your eyes to see his face.

"Thanks!"

You let him go and got up the stairs. He barely curved his lips at how happy you climbed them. Yeah, well he actually liked your stupid hugs.

soldier boy / reader

[riki-riks-chick]

jay smut :c

Life Saver ┃P.JS

Vamp!Jay x Turned!Reader

Jay turns y/n to keep her from dying, but was that the only reason?

cw: smut!, finger fucking, oral (fem rec), unprotected sex, vampire sex, blood mentions (biting/feeding), multiple orgasms, slight obsession, and i think that's it.

wdct: 1.7k

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Third Person POV~

You wake up in immense pain, vision blurry and ears ringing. you hear strong voices talking, and that's when you hear the words.  "You should have left her dead. why do you wanna be a hero so bad?" A strong voice rung through your ears as you opened your eyes, turning your head to face the two unfamiliar people, despite your aching head.

As soon as they heard the bed sheets rustle upon your movement, they both snapped their heads towards you. "You're awake! How do you feel!?" One of them rushed towards you, seating himself at the edge of the bed as you let your gaze fall on his platinum blonde head of hair. It framed his face perfectly. "I feel awful.." You spoke, your voice hoarse and raspy as you did. The other man in the room simply scoffed before taking his leave. 

 "Where am I?" You asked, glancing back at the kind man in front of you as he poured you a glass of water from the pitcher on the bedside table. "You're at my house.. You'll be staying here from now on.. Do you remember anything from when you were last awake?" He asked as you raised an inquisitive eyebrow, trying your hardest to remember your last conscious moment. 

 "Uhm.. I remember walking home after going out with my friends.. Those guys dragged me into that- wait.. what happened to me, and how did you find me?" You questioned as the man laughed nervously. "I saved your life..  It's a long story, really." He said as you shot up, immediately regretting the decision as your vision went blurry. "Steady.. The affects haven't worn off yet.. It's best to lay down for now.. Drink some water.."

You took a sip of water before laying back down. The second your head hit the cool silk pillow case, you felt somewhat at ease. "What's wrong with me? What affects are you talking about?" You asked as he sighed. "Promise not to freak out?.." He asked as you nodded. 

"I didn't want you to just die like that.. You looked so innocent, and... I may have turned you into vampire to keep you alive.." He explained as you stared at him, completely and utterly shocked. "I- I'm a vampire?" You stuttered out, and he nodded. "Yes, but it's hardly been long enough for the urges to kick in. Once you're okay to stand we can go through with your first feeding."

 "I'm a vampire!?" You repeated as he sighed. "Yes, but it's fine.. It's not much different from being human.. You're just immortal and have an undying thirst for human blood." He responded in a failed attempt to ease your mind, but you were still processing. "I'm a monster..."

 "Okay ouch.. We're not all monsters.. We live just like anyone else.. We didn't ask for this.." He said as you sighed. "Sorry..." You mumbled as he nodded. "It's whatever.. Get some rest and I'll check on you later.."

The second he left, the pulsing pain returned, making you wince. You couldn't even wrap your head around how much of a fucked up situation you were in. Eventually you fell back asleep, that way you wouldn't be distracted by the pain.

A few hours later, you were awaken by the same man as before. He was dressed differently this time, the dark clothing a stalking contrast against the white and gold face of the room.

He looked handsome, something you had hardly noticed before, and the sight of him seemed to ease your mind. "How are you feeling?.." He asked gently, his hand trailing your torso, it felt electrifying.

"I feel thirsty..." You explain simply, but he seems to understand perfectly. "I don't know if you're strong enough for your first feed, but you can feed off of me.." 

"What?..." You sound hesitant, but he brushes your hair out of your face, shushing you. "Don't worry... Every human has tasted blood before.. Just think of it as licking a bleeding cut.."

He then bites his wrist, his fangs stained crimson as he pulls you to sit up, letting you get your fill off of him. He runs his fingers through your hair in the process, easing you through it as you eventually pull away, your lips stained red, and your fangs peeking out curiously, the tips matching the same red color of your lips.

You seem to feel much better after your first feeding, but the glint in his eyes shows pure hunger. He leans in, capturing your lips with his own as he clears your lips of the crimson hue painting them. 

He pulls back, eyes glowing red as he smiles seductively. "I'm Jay..." He introduces before kissing you again, this time straddling you. His hands are planted on either side of you, hips meeting yours as you slide your hands up and over his shoulders, tugging him closer.

Something about him is simply impossible to resist, even the headache from earlier went away the second he got close. "Is this okay?.." He asks, his eyes almost begging you to say yes, and when you nod, he's sitting up, fumbling with the buttons of his shirt. You help him, sliding it off of his toned shoulders as you undo his pants as well,  

He stares at you, in a daze almost as he watches you undo his pants, sliding them just barely past his hips before palming him through his boxers. He allows you to touch him for a bit before he grows too impatient, pushing your hand away before kicking off his pants completely. 

He then tugs at your shorts, tugging them off of you along with your silk panties, letting them litter the floor with the rest of his clothes. "You're really pretty... I have to say..." He whispers, running his finger over your hole as he spreads your folds. "So wet.. Good." He smirks, sliding a finger into you as a means of teasing. 

It's only one, and it's not that deep, but fuck it feels good. It's unbelievable how good he's making you feel off of one finger, and once he adds a second you can't even focus. 

"Holy fuck..." You grab his hand, moaning as he grasps your wrist, moving your hand. "Does it feel good?.." He asks, despite need of an answer. You nod, biting your lip as you tilt your head back against the pillows.

Jay pulls his fingers out of you, leaning down to kiss you again as he removes his boxers. "You know... I couldn't bring myself to leave you when I saw you like that.. I got this feeling, and it made me crave you.. Not in a vampiric way though."

You're hearing every word he says, but you can't seem to focus. He presses his tip against you, rubbing his cockhead along your glistening folds. "Can I? Please?.." He asks as you nods, moaning as he slowly pushes into you, filling you up completely.

He doesn't wait to move, his hips making slow efforts as he thrusts into you. His cock is deep inside you and you're seeing stars already.

You don't know if it has anything to do with the fact that your senses are now heightened, but you feel so much more sensitive than before.

"Jay..." You moan his name, feeling your stomach turn pleasurably with each thrust. His cockhead creates a bulge in your lower abdomen with each thrust, and he presses down on it, making everything feel ten times better. "Fuck.."

You feel like you've already experienced an orgasm, but you know for sure you haven't. Everything just seems so much better with him right now.

"If you feel like you need to cum, just let go... Trust me it won't be the last." He mutters lowly, thrusting harder as he slides his hand underneath your shirt, groping your breast. "Fuck Jay.." You grip his wrist, growing closer to your release with each burning touch. "I'm gonna cum.."

He smiles at your words, his hips seeming to increase the speed of their movements. "Cum for me, princess.. Let it all go."

His words seem to send you over the edge as a bout of pleasure blooms in the pit of your stomach. He's now leading you through the best orgasm, hips still moving fiercly against yours as you moan extremely loud.

He fucks you through your orgasm, wanting to push you over the edge even more. You feel incredible. Words getting mixed up, and just overall incoherent.

It's not long before he's coming undone too, thrusting hard, but slower as he cums inside you, filling you with his essence. "Stop clenching around me, fuck.."

He pulls out slowly, watching his white substance spill out of you as he runs his fingers through it, sucking them clean afterwards. "What a pretty little mess."

You're simply watching his every move, already feeling fucked out.

He lowers himself between your legs, licking your cunt from bottom to top as he sucks on your clit, lapping up the mess of cum between your legs.

You squirm beneath him, letting out little whines and whimpers as you tug on his hair. "Jay... Please.." The pleasure is intense and Jay knows it, he's obsessed with the way he's making you feel right now.

"You taste so good, princess..." He's breathing needily against your pussy, licking into it as he slides his fingers into your hole, moving them in and out at a fast pace while focusing his tongue on your clit.

You feel the all too familiar feeling build up inside you again as he continues to eat at your dripping cunt, his fingers fucking into you slightly faster with every passing minute.

You give no warning as you cum, but he's fully prepared for it, lapping up every fluid you let out for him.

When he finally pulls away, chin glistening with your liquids, he pulls his fingers out of you, sticking them into your mouth to make you taste yourself.

You moan around his fingers, gripping his wrist as he smirks down at you. After a short while, he pulls his hand away, leaning in to kiss you. His cock is pressed against you, fully erect and ready to fuck you again. "I hope you enjoy tonight because I want to be like this for the rest of eternity..."

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I hope this was good 🫣

[kiss-me-cill-me]

could you write a fic about any cillian character, of ur choice, were its the readers first time and he is really sweet and gentle? Luv your writings btw!!!

Any character, you say...? 👀 Well, then I guess it's time to take a shot at my white whale. I love zombies, I love 28 Days Later, and I love Jim. I have been somewhat avoiding writing for him because I didn't feel like I had any strong concepts for a fic, and I struggle to get his "voice" right in my head for the dialogue. But gosh darn it, the world needs more Jim fics. And I feel like this prompt just fits him. Thank you for the request, anon, and for giving me the push I needed!

Morning Light

Pairing: Jim (28 Days Later) x Reader

Word Count: 3.6k

Summary: In a rare moment of peace in a strange new world, you and Jim find comfort in each other's arms.

Warnings: Smut, loss of virginity (for reader, not Jim), oral (f receiving), praise, brief mention of past attempted sexual assault (basically what happens in canon), for the purposes of this fic we're gonna pretend that Jim doesn't get shot in the stomach lmao

***Please read the warnings before continuing. Minors DNI***

Jim’s lips taste like something you can’t quite put your finger on. Whatever it is, it has you swooning. Dizzy with desire as you inhale; trying to steady your breath while your hand trails down over his bare chest.

“We really don’t have to,” he murmurs.

“I know,” you reply. “But I want to.”

You lean in for another kiss. Bodies pressed so tightly together, laying on the rickety little bed in the tiny cottage you now call home, you truly do want nothing more. Jim, stretched lazily out beneath you, brings a hand up to cup your face and deepen the kiss. Your senses swell with that scent, whatever it is, and your eyes flutter closed against the light that streams in through the windows.

“Are you sure?” he asks, pulling away again, just enough to speak.

His nose still brushes softly against yours, and his thumb trails over your cheek. You feel yourself melt deeper into his touch, almost too distracted to remember to respond.

“I’m sure.”

“But… really? So soon after…”

You know what he’s about to say. What he doesn’t want to remember; choosing instead to let himself trail off as he smooths his fingers over your jawline. But that - that horrible thing that almost happened - is all part of the reason why you want Jim so badly. You want your first time to be with him. To be special; with someone you truly care for. 

Years and years ago, when all of your friends had been so desperate to grow up and run headfirst into their sexuality, you had been content to wait. But now, things have changed. Being alive suddenly feels fragile and impermanent, and your dangerous encounter with the soldiers has taught you that life doesn’t wait for you. Nor does it wait for that perfect moment.

Although, this moment here with Jim does feel somehow perfect. Jim’s body against yours is warm, and even with both of your sweaters flung over the side of the bed, you feel a heat washing over your chest as Jim wraps his strong arms around you a little tighter.

“Jim, are you really the nervous one here?” You laugh, your voice a bit airy and high as it betrays your own nerves.

“M’not nervous,” he scoffs. “I’m just… I don’t want to hurt you, or force you into anything.”

You let your body sink into his. Jim pulls you even closer, pressing your weight into his chest. Your forehead rests lightly against his, noses still touching as you laugh again.

“Girl gets you naked in bed like this, and you still think you’re forcing her?” you tease.

“Well, fair.” Jim relents. “You were the one who took off my clothes.”

Jim nuzzles into another kiss as he speaks, breaking some of the tension and making you clutch at his chest. This time, his lips linger against yours a little longer, parting just slightly so the tip of his tongue can dart out. You feel the ache inside of you deepen, your body calling out to his.

“But you’re sure, though?” Jim asks again. He moves his hand to your shoulder, steadying you. “You do want to? We don’t have t-”

His words are cut off by your hand drifting lower, until your fingers are wrapped tightly around him. Despite Jim’s insistence that you don’t “have to,” it’s abundantly clear that he wants to.

His skin is like silk under your fingers. Your hand moves slowly up and down, coaxing him on as you bite at his lip. Jim breaks the kiss to lean his head back into the pillow, eyes still shut as an expression of bliss overtakes his features.

“Okay - you’re sure you haven’t done this before?” he jokes, one blue eye cracking open to look at you.

You try to contain a laugh.

“Don’t flatter me,” you tease back. “It’s probably just been months since you’ve gotten any…”

“Ouch, insulting my masculinity and yet she still expects me to fuck her.”

Jim meets your sly look with one of his own, just as your expression crumbles into embarrassment. His smirk quickly turns into a smile, seeing the effect his words have.

“And she likes a little dirty talk, does she?”

Your face heats up even more, and Jim kisses the tip of your nose. 

“Sorry, love. Just can’t resist teasin’ ya,” he hums.

Despite your inexperience, you feel certain that you’re not supposed to feel this flustered. But, Jim has that effect on you. He always has. The pressure that’s been steadily building between your legs suddenly feels even more uncomfortable.

“Having second thoughts?” Jim laughs as you wriggle against him.

“You wish,” you challenge, pressing your nose against his a bit harder.

Suddenly, Jim grabs your waist and flips you over, so that his weight is pressed over you. He sinks a kiss into the hollow of your neck - still gentle, but with a hint of lust now that’s becoming impossible to ignore.

“Guess I might as well just give in if y’want it so badly,” Jim whispers, his breath fanning hot against your chest.

His words send a thrill of excitement through you; bursting out from your lungs and rushing all the way down to your toes. You bring your hands up to his shoulders, clinging to him as he pulls away from you. You’re confused for a moment, until he looks up into your eyes as he sinks lower down your body.

“How’s this?” Jim starts. “First I’ll eat you out, an’ then we can see how you’re feeling.”

The air seems to catch in your throat, but you nod. Jim plants a soft kiss on your stomach before drifting lower, hands parting your legs so that he can settle in.

“Lucky me,” Jim says, taking a long look at you. “Pretty face and a pretty pus-”

“Jim!” you cry, covering your face with your hands.

He kisses the inside of your leg, teasing with a gentle nip of his teeth.

“Ah, don’t get all shy on me, now,” he murmurs.

You look down to see a devilish glint in Jim’s eyes, staring back up at you. They’re so blue, you think you could drown in them. But, you fight to shake yourself out of the trance.

“It’s hard not to when you’re… looking at it,” you complain, laughing nervously.

“Hey, don’t be embarrassed - I mean it. You’re beautiful.”

Your cheeks burn hotter than ever as Jim continues.

“Every part of you is beautiful.”

He kisses your leg again, and before you have a chance to respond, his lips have moved over your core, and you gasp. Jim’s mouth is warm and wet; his tongue pressed flat against you as he gives you a moment to get used to the sensation. It’s so different from anything you’ve ever felt. Of course, you had touched yourself there before - but Jim’s tongue is nothing like the rough pads of your fingers. It’s so soft, and you feel yourself sink further into the mattress, prompting a low creak from the ancient bedframe.

Jim’s tongue moves just a centimeter, brushing up against your clit as he sucks gently into his mouth. You can’t help the soft sigh that leaves you, or the way your fingers grab onto the bed sheets, fabric bunching up in your grip. 

“How’s that feel, love?” Jim asks, breaking away.

“It’s… wow,” you answer, already a little out of breath.

“Rave reviews,” Jim jokes, smile creeping back over his face. “Tell all your friends, yeah?”

You have half a mind to shove him, if only you could find the willpower to reach down between your legs. As it is, all you can do is let out another breathy sigh. Your body feels strangely heavy, and you use every ounce of your strength to move your hips down toward him.

“Jim… more,” you plead.

You expect him to make another quip, but instead, you feel his tongue press against you again, the fan of his breath tickling you as he sighs happily. Your fingers curl, and your back arches. One of Jim’s hands comes up to find yours, peeling your fingers out from the blankets so that they can intertwine with his. You squeeze his hand, feeling yourself grow more and more desperate as the swirl of new sensations overwhelm you.

“J-Jim-”

You barely get to start your sentence before the pleasure reaches its peak, washing over you like the rays of soft sunlight still pouring in through the windows. Your sharp cry turns into a gasp, breath hitching as your whole body seems to buzz. Jim’s hand in yours anchors you, as his lips kiss you gently through your release.

When he sits up, Jim’s face is just a bit too smug.

“What are you smiling at?” you groan, throwing your head back into the pillow to stare up at the ceiling.

“Making you feel good,” Jim answers sincerely.

He kisses his way back up your body, finally pressing his lips to your shoulder and leaving another small bite.

“How are you feeling?” he asks.

You sigh, letting all of the air leave your lungs. The pause lingers for a brief moment before you answer.

“Like I’m floating.”

“That good, huh?”

You can practically hear the smirk in Jim’s voice. Weakly, you bat at his arms.

“Don’t get all cocky,” you warn.

“I thought that’s what you wanted.”

Jim really is unbearable. You look at each other for a moment, Jim’s eyes fixed intently on your face, while you can still hardly focus on what’s in front of you. You wrap your arms around his neck, pulling him closer.

“Still want to keep going?” Jim asks you.

“Mmmm,” you sigh, nodding your head.

Jim’s hand slides down to cup your sex, one finger brushing against your entrance. He leans up to kiss you properly, pausing at the feel of your tongue in his mouth as you press past his lips. Whatever you had tasted there before was gone; replaced by your own slightly tangy arousal. Jim groans, and a deep hum fills your mouth.

“Let me know if you want me to stop,” he whispers.

But as soon as he pushes past your resistance, you know there’s no chance of you stopping him. The stretch is too good. You’ve done this before to yourself, too - but your fingers are slender compared to Jim’s. His fill you up and have you nearly seeing stars as you cling to him, moving to grasp his arms for support.

“Feels good?”

You nod, not trusting yourself to speak. The stretch only stings a little bit, and you’re so wet you barely even notice. The pleasure takes over as Jim pumps in and out of you, coating his finger with your slick.

“One more,” you beg.

“Be patient,” Jim scolds, as he continues to slowly work you open. “Try to relax a bit more.”

You do; letting your body settle down onto the mattress. As you relax your muscles, trying to focus again on your steady breathing, Jim kisses the edge of your jaw.

“Okay,” he says. “Tell me if this is too much.”

Despite your best attempts to loosen up, the addition of a second finger is just a bit painful, stretching you beyond anything you’ve felt before. You jump, a little surprised, then relax into the feel of it.

“Still alright?”

“Mmm-hm,” you reply, breathing slowly out through your nose.

“Good,” Jim breathes. “Doing so well for me, love.”

His words make you melt, and you feel yourself clenching around his fingers. Jim lets out a low moan.

“Fuck,” he laughs. “You’re gonna feel amazing. Can’t wait ‘til you’re wrapped around me.”

There’s that familiar heat on your face, rushing in as Jim makes your whole body burn with his words yet again. Not as filthy as before, but somehow the genuine lust in his voice is even worse. You feel him yearning for you; still pressed hard against your leg as he patiently stretches you out. You tilt your head back into the pillows, silently begging him to kiss your neck, and Jim’s lips press over your pulse.

“Jim?” you sigh.

“Hm?”

“Can you please stop stalling and fuck me now?”

You feel Jim smirk against your neck, clearly enjoying the fact that you have a dirty mouth, too - when you want to. He presses one more kiss to your collarbone.

“Stalling, am I? First time I’ve heard a girl call it that.”

Jim laughs, briefly, and you feel his breath fan over you again.

“I’d ask if you’re sure you’re ready,” he taunts. “But I really don’t think I’ve ever made anyone this wet before.”

You’re so turned on you almost forget to be embarrassed, but the feeling of Jim shifting to line up with your entrance is enough to make that burning heat creep over your cheeks again.

“Are you ready, though?” Jim asks, kissing you quickly before pulling back to let you answer.

“I am.”

You reach up to wrap your arms tight around him again as he sinks into you, pressing forward inch by inch. Your eyes widen by the time he’s halfway in, shocked at how it just keeps going. Jim feels your hesitation and stops.

“Everything alright?” he pants. Clearly, Jim is having a bit of trouble composing himself, too.

“It’s fine,” you reply. “Just… big.”

Jim laughs, a little more strained than usual as your walls press all around him.

“You’ll really have to stop stroking my ego like that if you want this to last more than five minutes, love,” he teases.

“Jim…” you start to complain.

“I know, I know. ‘Shut up and fuck me,’ she says,” Jim mutters. He presses into you a bit more, and a soft, desperate sigh leaves your lips. “Or at least, she would if she could think straight,” he continues.

He’s right; you’re not thinking of anything other than him, and how he’s filling you up so completely. Stretching out your walls and touching places inside of you that you didn’t know even existed, until now. Replacing the dull ache of your arousal with an unfamiliar pressure - but certainly not an unwelcome one.

“How’s it feel?” Jim asks.

“It’s… different. Feels kind of weird,” you admit.

“Okay, you don’t have to keep my ego in check that much,” Jim laughs. His eyes meet yours for a brief second, and then close. “But, fuck, you feel so fucking good.”

Jim’s face dips down to your shoulder, and you can tell that he’s barely still able to hold it together. Although you had been joking earlier, you’re certain that it truly has been months for Jim. You can’t say for sure when the last time he got laid was, but it had to have been before the start of everything. Poor guy. This is the perfect opportunity to mess with him. Call it payback for all the teasing.

“Alright,” you sigh, trying to keep your voice light and jovial. It’s harder than it should be when your heart is pounding out of your chest. “I got what I wanted out of you; we can stop now.”

Jim groans above you, his forehead pressing even deeper into the crook of your shoulder.

“You’re joking,” he whines, one hand gripping at your waist. His fingers tighten a little. “Please say you’re joking.”

You stay silent, lips pursed together in a barely-contained smile. Jim pulls back to look at you, and instantly notices the smug look on your face.

“You’re unbelievable,” Jim huffs, pressing his lips against your neck once again in a hungry kiss.

He pinches your hip, making you squirm. Jim steadies you, holding you in place as he plants another kiss on your lips, then pulls back.

“We haven’t even gotten to the good part yet,” he teases.

“You mean the good part wasn’t watching you almost cum all over the sheets just from eating me out?”

Now it’s Jim’s turn to be flustered, and you watch with delight as a soft dusting of pink crosses his cheeks.

“You’d better watch it,” Jim says, squeezing you again. “I was gonna be gentle, you know. But if you keep this up, I might just have to fuck you silly.”

You giggle, the sound of your bright laughter filling the room. For a few seconds, the only thing in the world that matters is Jim. Every moment that’s brought you here, no matter how painfully etched in stone, is worth it to be here with him.

“Will you, though?” you say, bringing Jim’s face a bit closer so yours can look into his eyes. “Be gentle?”

“Of course,” Jim hums, leaning down to kiss your soft lips. “Are you still feeling okay?”

“Yes…”

And you are. You've gotten used to the stretch, and the strange pressure has built into a need that has you fighting to stop yourself from pushing up against Jim’s hips, desperate for friction.

“You sure?” Jim asks, sensing that something has been left unsaid.

“I just… I want to feel you move,” you admit, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.

Jim turns his head to kiss your temple, letting his lips hover over your warm skin.

“That's the good part, love,” Jim teases. “Wrap your legs around me,’kay?”

You do as he says, bringing your legs up to fold around his waist. It causes Jim to hit at a new angle inside you, and for a second you think about backing out. This feels like it could be too much; like he's able to press too deeply inside of you - and the thought of giving someone else so much of yourself is daunting.

But when Jim starts to move, gently and carefully, all of your worries disappear. The first few times he thrusts feel a bit strange, but soon, the feeling is making you lightheaded in the best possible way. Not to mention the way that the swell of his head seems to part you, making you clench at his absence and sigh in pure bliss when he fills you back up. You can feel every inch of yourself as he slowly rocks in and out, hips staying close to avoid overwhelming you.

“Jim!” you cry, squeezing your legs around him a little harder.

“You like it there?” he grunts, his voice gentle but laced with desire.

He changes his angle to hit the spot again, and this time your fingers press into his back. Jim kisses you, swallowing your moans as you feel yourself building toward your release. This time, with Jim pressing deep inside you, you feel yourself clamp down around him.

“Gonna come for me again, pretty girl?” Jim whispers.

Your body is too rigid to even nod as you feel it finally wash over you - a wave of pleasure more intense than you can handle. You're panting and laughing all at once as Jim presses kisses all over your face.

“That was incredible,” he praises, softly. 

You look up to see him, his face framed so perfectly in the glow of the morning light. His lips are slightly parted, awe plainly written in the way his eyes trail over you. You have a sudden urge to run your fingers through his cropped hair, and press his mouth to yours.

But instead, Jim leans down to give you another gentle kiss. That taste on his lips is back again, slightly sweet and utterly addictive. 

“Enjoy your first time, love?” Jim teases, pulling himself out of you with one final, toe-curling drag. He kisses you again, lips pressed firm against yours like there’s truly nowhere else in the world he’d rather be.

You surface from your post-sex haze just long enough to be confused. Aren't these things supposed to end with a little more… bravado?

“Jim, aren't you gonna…? Don't you want to…?”

“Not this time, love,” he cuts in. “Like I said, don't want to hurt you.”

“You wouldn’t hurt me!” you protest.

Jim pauses, still hovering just above you. He leans down to whisper in your ear, his low voice getting a shade darker.

“Maybe not, but I do think I might break the poor bed if I let myself do everything I want to ya,” he murmurs.

“We can sleep on the floor,” you say, responding without hesitation.

Jim laughs softly, trailing his fingers over the swell of your hip. He pulls back to look at you again, blue eyes swimming with lust.

“Don't worry, love - you look so good like this, I'm not gonna be able to resist it for long. But for now…”

Jim flops down onto the rickety bed, pulling you with him to rest on his chest. The rhythmic rise and fall of his breath makes you feel calm, soothing you all the way down from your high. Jim brings a hand up to cradle your neck, pressing you into him just a bit more so that he can lean down to kiss your forehead.

As you lay there together, your eyes flutter closed.

“Jim?”

“Mm?”

“Thank you.”

“For what?” he scoffs. 

Same playful Jim that you first fell for, weeks ago now. You can't help but smile, and snuggle up a bit closer.

“For always being here for me,” you answer.

“Of course, love.” Jim's breaths are slowing down now, lulling you into the same sleep that he's quickly falling into. “Any time.”

You kiss him, lips pressing into his bare chest, and Jim’s arms squeeze you tightly. As the sunlight streams in through the dusty windows, blanketing both of you in its warmth, you realize just how lucky you are. You press an ear against his chest, listening to the thrum of Jim’s heartbeat.

[spidernuggets]

Jason Todd x Reader

"Where are you going? Look, the Titans needs us-"

"Fuck them, Rose. Fuck all of you"

"Jason, please! Where are you gonna go?? We can figure something out!"

When Jason left with Rose out of Gotham City, you were heartbroken. You kept a one-sided love hidden, thinking it would be too selfish to confess your feelings to him while he's in an unstable state of self hatred. But when Dick revealed that he killed Deathstroke's son just moments after you managed to get Jason to step away from the ledge, you almost let your secret slip when Jason was swiftly packing his things as you begged him to stay.

"Figure what out, Y/N? Huh? Why are you even staying? Almost everyone is leaving anyway, and Dick is just a liar," Jason argued, stuffing his duffle bag with whatever clothes he could find.

"Because the Titans are the only family I have! At least Gar is staying. But you don't have to leave, Jay"

"And why shouldn't I? There's nothing for me here. Everyone hates me, hell, even you probably hate me. You only got me off the roof out of pity"

"That's not true, Jason."

"Then why else would you?!"

"Because I-" You quickly stop yourself, knowing things would only become worse if your feelings were revealed. So you took a deep breath and took a second to calmed down.

"Because you're my friend, Jay. One of the best friends I ever had. And I don't want you to leave," you say quietly.

Jason stared at you for a couple of seconds before taking your hand in his. "Then come with us. You don't have to do everything Dick tells you to anymore, no more lies, no more half truths."

You sighed, "I can't."

"Why not?"

"Yeah, I don't think I like the idea of third wheeling you and Rose," you try to joke, but your heart actually aching at the thought. "But seriously, I don't think leaving is a good idea, especially with Deathstroke around. And being alone with his daughter, I mean-"

"Wait, what you don't trust her or something?" Jason interrupts you, taking slight offence.

"I'm just saying to be cautious, Jason. I mean, Deathstroke already kidnapped you once and-"

"And what? You think Rose is working with him? Jesus Christ, and I thought I was fucked up," He scoffs. "Y'know, Rose admired that I made it out alive from her dad. I managed to make it out alive, and you still think I'm weak?"

"Jason, I never said that!-"

"Nah, fuck this, you're just like everyone else here," Jason says, zipping his bag close and storming out the room.

"Jason!" You tried calling out, just for him to ignore.

-

"What, was it part of Daddy's training to fuck me this whole time?!" Jason yells at Rose. "I'm done with this shit," he says, grabbing his bag, starting to leave the home the two raided.

Rose quickly grabbed onto his arm to prevent him from leaving.

"Look, none of this was supposed to happen. It just did," she tries to tell him, but he ignores her, tearing his arm away from her grip.

"Get the fuck off me." He cries, and as if by reflex, Rose strikes a punch at him, blood quickly falling down his now broken nose.

"C'mon! Fight me! You know you want to!" She says in desperation.

Jason sends a cold stare. "Are we done?" She doesn't reply, tears building up in her eye. "We're done," he says, walking towards the door as Rose cries.

"Where are you going? Look the Titans needs us!" She calls out to him as he reaches the door.

"Fuck them, Rose. Fuck all of you," he replies, finally walking out the door with only one thing on his mind.

You.

He hailed the first cab he could find, telling the driver to head back to Gotham City.

All he could think about was how stupid he was to you. You were right, and he just left you like you were nothing. You saved him, and he treated you like dirt. You said he was your friend, and he abandoned you.

He rushed out the taxi after paying the driver, running up to the small apartment you were living at. You spent most of your time in Titan's Tower, but went back to your place when you wanted to be fully alone.

Your apartment was only big enough for one person, granted there were ants here and there, and a little mould growing in some places, but you saw it as your own place.

Jason knocked on your door three times, followed by a call of your name. He knocked again, a little louder, and a little more desperate. What if you weren't home? He couldn't go back to Titans Tower, he wasn't ready to see everyone else.

When no one answered, his shoulders slumped, and was about to walk away.

But your door opened, and you appeared on the other side, rubbing your red eyes with a fluffy blanket draped over your shoulders and your hair running wild as it was tangled and bunched all over the place.

"Jesus, who died," you say groggily, having not registered who knocked on your door.

Jason's eyes brightened as he returned to the front of your door.

"Y/n.." He softly called out. You stopped rubbing your eyes as you looked up at him, eyes widening as you couldn't believe Jason was standing right in front of you.

"Jason.." You replied, not knowing what to say. "How have you- uhm.. D'you wanna come in?" You awkwardly offered, Jason nodding as you stepped aside for him to walk in.

You directed him towards the couch. "Uh.. do you want something to drink or..."

"No." Jason quickly replies. "I- I just needa talk to you."

You nod, walking over to sit beside him on the couch.

"So.."

"I'm sorry," he says, looking at you with those glassy eyes. "You were right. Rose was spying on me, working with Deathstroke, you were right. I should've listened to you, I should've stayed. Just- just say I told you so and-"

You interrupted Jason by lunging towards him, blanket falling off as you wrapped your arms around him. "I'm so glad you're back," you said, your voice muffled.

Jason sits there in shock, slowly wrapping his arms around your middle. "You- You're not mad?"

You pull away, "Why would I be mad?" You ask, hands boldly reaching up to hold his face.

"Why wouldn't you be! I treated you like shit! I didn't listen to you, then I just left! How could not hate me?" He says in an outburst.

All you do is sigh and look away.

"What? What is it?" Jason asks.

"It's because I love you, Jay," you finally confess. Jason's eyes widened and was left speechless. All he could do was lean closer as his gaze shift down to your lips.

You lightly chuckle as you olace a hand against his chest to stop him.

"Stop. You're only doing that because of guilt," You say.

But Jason shakes his head. "No. No, I don't believe I am," he replies. "You've no idea how much I wanted this. Ever since you joined the team, I promise you."

You sighed. "Listen, you just parted ways with Rose, I don't actually think you-"

"A chance," he interrupts. "Give me a chance to show you how much I care for you. How much I feel the same for you. Take you out on dates, give you flowers, whatever. Just a chance, and if you still don't believe it, fine, I leave you be. But a chance is all I beg for."

You look down at your fiddling fingers, eyebrows furrowed, wondering whether or not he's telling the truth.

"One chance," you say. "One chance and one chance only. If you screw this up, then that's that."

Yeah I didn't really know how to finish it off, like I had the idea for the start but didn't know how to make the rest of the story so its pretty shit, but at the same time, its 2am so whatevah

Jason smiles, bringing you in for a tight embrace. "You won't regret it, I promise you, mama."

[hymemena]

Schoolyard Heroes Abominations Lyric Starters

Feel free to change pronouns as necessary, and remember to specify muse for multimuse blogs.

CW: Torture, death, violence, injury, sacrifice, insect mention, ghost mention

—

Dude, Where's My Skin?

"Cut out your tongue and sing for me."

"You're so dead to me."

"I wanna see you suffering for me."

"Sink your teeth right into me."

"Death calls."

"The insects crawl."

"The ghosts you created are calling you out."

"Take off your skin and dance with me."

"Stare to the heavens."

"These lovely cadavers will block out the light."

The Plastic Surgery Hall Of Fame

"Fifteen minutes is much too generous."

"Suffering with none of the benefits?"

"They will be your plague tonight."

"Nothing shatters like broken glass."

"You're so pretty."

"And you're so dead."

"Look at what they've done to us."

"Built for deception."

"Man-made smiles make the mirrors ache."

"Now your face displays the modern age."

Cemetery Girls

"The skies weren't always black."

"We're still burning."

"My dear, nobody's safe."

"Do you hear me?"

"We will rise tonight."

"The cemetery line has wrapped itself around the world."

"We're still screaming."

"Did you pray?"

"Why would you waste another word on God?"

"I am the Devil and I've come to do the Devil's work."

Violence Is All The Rage

"Let me introduce you to your nightmare."

"You set it to burn?"

"You set it to life."

"You're screaming out but no one's listening."

"We're burning tonight."

"Oh, won't you lie to me tonight?"

"You're saying everything I wanna hear."

"Blood thirsty?"

"You're hiding diamonds in your pockets."

"Darling, there's no way to stop you, now."

Children Of The Night

"They said we'd never make it out of here alive!"

"Everything you touch shall be destroyed."

"Everything you love is crushed and broken."

"Oh, children of the night."

"There's no one waiting for you."

"You're a creature born without a name."

"I'll call you shame."

"Maybe vengeance?"

"Won't you tell me?"

"Tell me!"

The Last Man On Earth

"The world's on fire."

"Wrap me in your napalm blanket."

"You and I are the king and queen of nothing, Baby."

"Take my hand."

"It's better now together, though it's only us."

"We'll raise our glass."

"Now, there's nothing left."

"Fall asleep."

"You and I must make a pledge."

"One more time?"

Razorblade Kisses

"Your lipstick tastes like murder."

"Our hands are sewn together?!"

"We'll come to one another."

"Destroy me to your liking."

"Razorblade kisses leave you bleeding, Baby."

"You're so gorgeous."

"Your lovers' hearts will destroy me."

"Pay me with their lives tonight."

"You are mine."

"Some curses make things worse."

Sometimes They Come Back

"I've come to warn you."

"They're coming for you."

"I've come to tell you how they'll deceive you."

"Tell me!"

"Tell me all the filthy things I wanna hear."

"We have never felt so hollow."

"I'm listening."

"You're not coming back."

"We tried to warn them. They never listen."

"Pray you'll make it through the night."

Beautiful Woman Hunter

"There's a million stitches!"

"How they love to see us shaking."

"Watch the minute hand chase the hour."

"Boys you wanted, girls you devoured!"

"You are the lover, I'm the destroyer."

"Sing for me."

"Won't you take my hand once more?"

"We're still trembling."

"There's no telling what we'll do, now."

"There are no lovers-- Only destroyers."

All The Pretty Corpses

"They will sing to you in praise."

"Darling, won't you touch me?"

"Into the hearts of everyone you love?"

"I hope you hurt so badly, Baby."

"We'll die so slowly!"

"My dear, we'll burn tonight."

"All the rotting harlots, they will memorize your name."

"Revealing that the faces are the same."

"Darling, turn me inside out. Destroy me just for fun."

"Do you hear them screaming?"

Screaming "Theatre" In A Crowded Fire

"If I'm not mistaken, I've murdered you twice before, my dear."

"It's true, my dear."

"You smeared my blood like a whore's mascara."

"It was the right thing to do at the time."

"I snapped my fingers and I made you mine."

"Tonight you're mine completely, Baby."

"I've torn your heart out three times, now."

"You tore me up like I was made of paper."

"You're never gonna see me again."

"Tonight you'll be my only one."

[thedepthsoffandomminds]

Maze runner the scotch trials- chapter twelve -

Previously chapter.

Masterlist

Newt kept you tight against his chest the whole helicopter ride, Minho clutching to your hand. He had just killed a friend and you knew he needed your comfort as well. A part of you wanted to never forgive him and a part that wanted to cry for him.

The helicopter landed and you all started piling out. It took four men to carry the crate that Mai Mai had been slung into.

There was a growling scratch from the hills and the soldiers started firing.

“Cranks, we got cranks!” You hear someone shouting and you're ushered along with the others inside the towering building. Inside soldiers were rushing about, some doing their duties and others helping to defend outside. It was the biggest room and largest number of adults you could remember seeing. You clutched to Newt's side.

You're shown to a room that had a table filled with food and were told to wait there. You all ate until you felt sick and it was good.

“Nothing like my stew.” Frypan remarked. You all giggled. The door opened and a thin man with stubble on his face walked in

“You kids doing all right? Sorry about all the fuss. We had ourselves a bit of a swarm.” He said.

“Who are you?” Thomas asked.

“I'm the reason you're all still alive. It's my intention to keep you that way. Now, come with me. We'll get you kids squared away.” He leads you through the halls and corridors,

“You can call me Mr. Janson. I run this place.

For us it is a sanctuary, safe from the horrors of the outside world. You all should think of it

as a way station. Kind of a home between homes. Watch yourselves.”

“That mean you're taking us home?” Thomas tries to keep up with him.

“A home of sorts. Sadly, there wouldn't be much left of wherever you came from. But we do have a place for you. A refuge, outside the Scorch, where WICKED will never find you again. How does that sound?” He grins over his shoulder.

“Why are you helping us?”

“Let's just say the world out there is in a rather precarious situation. We're all hanging on by a very thin thread. The fact that you kids can survive the Flare virus… makes you the best chance of humanity's continued survival. Unfortunately, it also makes you a target, as no doubt by now you've noticed.

Beyond this door lies the beginning of your new lives. First things first…” he uses an ID badge to open a door into a long corridor, “let's do something about that smell.” He grins and shows you all.into the shower room. It's one big room with around twenty shower cubicles. At one end is a long bench with several piles of clothes and towels on top. Each one with a name written on a slip of paper. You grabbed the one with your name on and placed it on a wooden chair beside the cubicle you had chosen. A woman in a blue uniform tells you to drop all your dirty clothing outside the showers. It felt strange to strip yourself in this foreign place but the water was warm and soothed your aching bones. You watch as Gally's blood washes from your hands and you use the provided cloth to scrub at your body. You realise now that you had several cuts and bruises on your body that stung with the soap. You hissed at the pain.

“You okay?” You hear Newt ask from the cubicle next door.

“Yeah, I'm okay.” You call back. You turn off the shower and use the towel to dry yourself before bringing the clothes in to dress yourself. The clean underwear feels good after wearing the same three pairs for the last three years. You pulled the soft cotton t-shirt over your head along with a pair of cargo pants. The fresh socks felt wonderful on your feet as you slid them into new black boots. Newt came over to you drops of water still dripping from his blonde hair.

“You ready?” He asks you and you add a dark blue hoody to your outfit. You follow Newt out to the next room where doctors were taking Minho and Teresa through some tests. They did it with you too. You would go between each station and they would test your stamina, your strength, your health. One nurse took seven miles of blood from you.

You see a woman walk over to Teresa who was sitting on a bed and pull the curtains across. ‘that's weird’ you think to yourself. The nurse clicked her fingers in front of your face.

“We'll need a urine sample.” She repeats

“What? Why?” You ask.

“To make sure you aren't pregnant.”

“Whoa what the hell? Of course I'm not!” You gawk at the question. Though you supposed it made sense you had been trapped in a maze with thirty six teenage boys.

When the tests are finally done you, Newt, Minho, Frypan and Winston are led into a large mess hall. There were easily another hundred kids in there. Your group go to the counter. You weren't hungry after the table of food from earlier so you just took a drink and some biscuits. The boys fill up their plates however.

“Where do you think they've taken Thomas and Teresa?” Winston asks as you all sit at a table.

“I don't know, but I don't trust it.” You sigh.

“What do you mean?” Minho asked.

“I don't trust her.” You admit.

“Three years you waited for another girl and now you're jealous?” Frypan laughed. You kicked his shin under the table playfully.

“I'm not Jealous I just…I dunno, it's a feeling.” you shrug again.

Two boys come over and sit down at your table.

“Hi Newbies.” The larger of the two said with a wide grin.

A man walked over to you with a clipboard in his hand.

“Y/n, the doctors have asked to see you.” he says stoically. You glance quickly at the other boys as you stand up.

“Don't worry, I'm sure you won't be long.” The man smiles. You follow him out of the mess hall and down a corridor to a small room that has only two chairs and table in it.

“Please sit down, they'll be with you in a moment.” The man says before shutting the door. A few agonising minutes passed until a woman in a white lab coat stepped in. She had a pile of papers in her hands, that she shuffled through.

“Nothing to worry about, y/n. I just have a few things to go over with you.” She sat down across from you.

“Okay so firstly your results came back and you are not pregnant.” She laughed.

You raise your eyebrows and nod, “oh yeah, I mean I was worried.” you replied sarcastically.

“Okay, are you aware of your blood status? You have an extremely high count of the enzyme that W.C.K.D look for. One of the highest we've seen in fact.”

“Okay, and what does that mean?” You ask, feeling even more suspicious.

“Well, only that we are surprised you were put into the trials. Normally they wouldn't put you in…from what we've seen at least.” She appears to correct her language.

“We wanted to give you an opportunity. Your memories back.” She says.

“Just me? Did you offer anyone else theirs back?”

“We taking it slowly. Your friend Teresa has already agreed.” She gave you a smile that you think must work.to persuade other people. You make it look like your considering the concept.

“It's a fairly new procedure you see, we haven't tested it on many of you yet.” There is a little panic in her voice. “Um, if it's okay I'd like to wait till you've tested it a bit more. I don't want to risk losing my current memories.” you shake your head and get up from the table, “I can go back to the others now?” You point at the door.

“Yes I suppose.” The doctor stood and opened the door, letting you out, “take her back to the mess hall.” She ordered the guard.

“Oh, is Mai Mai okay? Where is she?” You ask.

“The tiger? Yes I believe she is doing well, down with the other animals I'd say.” She says to you, before turning and walking away. Her words did little to ease your worries. You return to the mess hall just as Jansen starts calling out names.

“Good evening, gentlemen. Ladies. You all know how this works. If you hear your name called, please rise in an orderly fashion, join my colleagues behind me, where they will escort you to the eastern wing. Your new lives are about to begin.

Connor.

Evelyn.

Ev!

Justin.

Peter.

Allison.

Squiggy.

All right. Settle down.

Franklin. And Abigail. Now, now, don't get discouraged. If I could take more, I would. There's always tomorrow. Your time will come. Go on, eat up.” There was a round of applause as the chosen few walked to the doors behind Jansan. The boys all started talking but you ignored them, resting your head on Newt's shoulder, drawing invisible circles on his arm with your fingers. It wasn't until Thomas abruptly stood up and rushed across the room.

“Hey, Teresa? Teresa!” You can see her through the window being guided somehow with the same woman you had just spoken to.

“Hey, hey, hey.” Jansan stopped Thomas with a gentle hand on his chest.

“Where are they taking her?”he asked frantically.

“They just have to run a few more tests. Don't worry, they'll be done with her soon.” He tried to put on his calmest smile.

“Is she okay?”

“She's fine.” he gestured for Thomas to go back to his table and he reluctantly returned to you all.

An hour or so later you are all told to go to bed and one of the guards leads you all down a long corridor.

“Okay boys, this is your room, y/n you'll be bunking down th-”

“No way!” All five boys spoke at once.

“She stays with us.” Newt grabbed you and put you behind him so you were firmly between them all.

“We've got orders lads, don't complicate things.”

“She stays with us.” Newt says again punctuating each word.

“Whatever. Just no funny business.” The guard shakes his head and walks away.

“Thanks guys.” You say as you all walk inside.

“I could get used to this," Newt says, laying back on the soft bed. You laugh and climb on to one of the bunks.

“What do you think those guys want with Teresa?” Thomas asks you all.

“Now, if there's one thing I know about that girl,she can take care of herself.Don't worry about it.” Newt reassures him. You each climb into your beds and get coasy before falling asleep. The real beds with real pillows felt amazing.

You're woken up a few hours later by a noise in the bunk below.

“Hey. Down here.” A voice whispered.

@fandomfan-102 @deanstolemydragon @afalls14universe

[areyoudreaminof]

This Life and the Next: A Nessian Playlist

It's finally @nessianweek! And of course for Day 3 I had to make a playlist!

We love their banter, their angst, their passion, and their deep undying love for one another. To watch Cassian and Nesta find each other despite their own personal challenges was such a beautiful and satisfying love story. For this playlist, I tried to follow a somewhat narrative structure that fell in line with ACOSF. I wanted to represent these two people finding one another and lifting the other up. This playlist also has a fun little bonus track for your fun Nessian writing needs. LISTEN HERE and take a look at some lyrics behind the cut.

As The World Caves In-Matt Maltese

My feet are aching And your back is pretty tired And we've drunk a couple bottles, babe And set our grief aside And here it is, our final night alive And as the earth burns to the ground Oh, girl, it's you that I lie with As the atom bomb locks in Oh, it's you I watch TV with As the world, as the world caves in

Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene-Hozier

Feeling more human and hooked on her flesh, I Lay my heart down with the rest at her feet Fresh from the fields, all fetor and fertile It's bloody and raw, but I swear it is sweet

Lose My Cool-Amber Marks

I was so full of pain just stuck in my head There was no one that could get me out of it Yes I think the drinking was a bit excessive Just to be frank the drinking ain't what caused me to be aggressive My heart has been taken over Everyday I get colder to 'em I realize need to let go expression from the get go to 'em Feeling it like I just need to speak my brain

Banquet-Bloc Party

And if you feel A little left behind We will wait for you on the other side 'Cause I'm on fire 'Cause you know I'm on fire when you come

Homage-Mild High Club

Please just have a laugh with me 'Cause you know I'm borrowing by now These sounds, have already crowned Come on it's a silly dream Dreaming of the imagery unfound The view sits nice from that cloud

Make You Better-The Decemberists

I'll love you in springtime I lost you when summer came And when you pulled backwards I wanted to, I needed to Oh-oh, to make me better

Andromeda- Weyes Blood

Treat me right I'm still a good man's daughter Let me in if I break And be quiet if I shatter Gettin' tired of looking You know that I hate the game Don't wanna waste any more time You know I been holdin' out Love is calling It's time to give to you

Skulls-Bastille

I don't want to rest in peace I'd rather be the ghost that annoys you I hope you can make me laugh Six feet down when we're bored of each other A match is our only light

When our lives are over and all that remains Are our skulls and bones, let's take it to the grave And hold me in your arms, hold me in your arms I'll be buried here with you And I'll hold in these hands, all that remains

Leather-Tori Amos

Look, I'm standing naked before you Don't you want more than my sex? I can scream as loud as your last one But I can't claim innocence Oh God, could it be the weather? Oh God, why am I here? If love isn't forever And it's not the weather Hand me my leather

waves-Miguel & Kacey Musgraves

Put it out, I'm on fire, fire That’s what I’m about, take me higher, higher, tonight I'm gonna ride that wave

the last beautiful thing I saw..-Paris Paloma

And I looked up, and saw the sun It separated all the colors And the ice, into my eyes It fell and left me blind That was the last thing that I saw The fractured glass and its downpour I felt the blood mix with the water And I didn't see no more

Rut-The Killers

So I'm handing you a memory I hope you understand That steadily reminds you of who I really am

This city's always breathing, I wish that it would die The kickbacks and the bachelors, the fever for the velvet rope The money from my mother's men I'm not like her, you're not like them

Tell Me You Love Me-Sufjan Stevens

My love, I've lost my faith in everything Tell me you love me anyway, tell me you love me anyway My love, I feel myself unravelling Tell me you love me anyway, tell me you love me anyway My love, I feel the darkness on my back

Eternal Flame-Saint Sister

I believe it's meant to be, darling I watch you when you are sleeping You belong with me Do you feel the same? Or am I only dreaming? Is this burning an eternal flame?

Milk & Black Spiders-Foals

Oh, I hope you can hear me All those million miles away, you'd stay 'Cause I'd love you dearly All those billion miles away 'Cause I've been around two times And found that you're the only thing I need

BONUS TRACK: Smut-Tom Lehrer

Give me smut And nothing but! A dirty novel I can't shut If it's uncut And unsubt-tle

Taglist: @asnowfern @damedechance @foundress0fnothing @foreverinelysian @gaeleria @goddess-aelin @itsthedoodle @kataravimes-of-the-shire @krem-does-stuff @labellefleur-sauvage @moodymelanist @c-e-d-dreamer @nessianweek @octobers-veryown @popjunkie42-blog @reverie-tales @rosanna-writer @spell-cleavers @sassyhobbits @separatist-apologist @secret-third-thing @thesistersarcheron @the-lonelybarricade @ultadverb @vulpes-fennec @witchlingsandwyverns @xtaketwox @wilde-knight @witch-and-her-witcher @iftheshoef1tz @ofduskanddreams @talons-and-teeth

[rainintheevening]

West, Part I

Maps stretched out

The day after Peter ships out, the maps start appearing on the wall of the Fifth form common room at St. Maurice’s. Europe as a whole at first, then Italy, the Mediterranean, Greece, Germany, France...

He takes them home with him at the end of the term, Edmund Pevensie does, scatters them over his (and Peter's) room, mixed up with newspapers and letters in Peter's dashing handwriting.

Too many miles to count

He tries to find closer maps, more detail, tracing his finger across mountain ranges and down coastlines. He spans the entire Allied line with his thumb. He'd never felt the world to be so big before, never felt so small. Narnia had been such a small country. How long would it take to sail around the Cape of Gibraltar? How long would it take to fly to Sicily?

Sometimes he does the math. Sometimes he doesn't.

Let's just say we're inches apart

Remember watching the stars with Oreius? How you'd sketch them with your finger so carefully? How we'd lie out in the grass with Era and Philip, in silence sometimes, for hours? There were so many stars out there in the country. Some nights I'm lucky to see stars here. But when I do I imagine you seeing the same ones, mapping your way the way to well, your way to me. Sometimes I swear I can feel you beside me in the dark, little brother.

He lies in Peter's bed, letter in his hand, falls asleep with paper between his fingers.

And even closer at heart

For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope: for what a man seeth, why doth he yet hope for? But if we hope for that we see not, then do we with patience wait for it. Likewise the Spirit also helpeth our infirmities: for we know not what we should pray for as we ought: but the Spirit itself maketh intercession for us with groanings which cannot be uttered.

Even as his pen moves over the paper, he finds his lips moving too, a begging murmur, mixing with the summer rain heavy on the roof.

And we'll be just fine

He laughs as Lucy places the crown of daisies on his head, and kisses her cheek. He rubs Susan's aching feet as she sits on the couch and reads aloud to them. He fingers his little silver lion against his collarbone, and smiles through the steam rising off his coffee.

Another pin pushed in

The maps on the wall grow a forest of colored heads and tiny flags, and anyone who wants war news or any better understanding of the progression of the European theatre goes to the Fifth's common room.

To remind us where we've been

He takes a map down to the stables sometimes, unrolls it on the table in the harness room, sits patiently as Master Gringham pores over it, searching for the boy who rode his horses like no one else, all of them trying to coordinate themselves.

The horses miss you, he writes to Peter. Have you had a chance to ride recently?

And evey mile adds up

He lies alone in their room, catching the faint murmurs of his parents downstairs, and he can't remember the last time he cried on Christmas, but he's doing it now, hot salt water on Peter's pillow, as Bing Crosby croons on the wireless in the girls' room down the hall.

Please, God, please let him come home safe, please let him be happy, please.

Leaving its mark on us

I was grieved to hear of your wounding, brother, but truly grateful it was not more serious. I wish I could be there, to make sure you were getting proper care and treatment. Be careful, please. But don't be a coward. I'd rather a dead brother, than a coward. But don't die. You're not allowed to die without me.

He means it, every word, that's why he doesn't cross any of it out.

And sometimes our compass breaks

Twelve of them dead, and I alive, and I don't know why, Ed, but I don't know if I can do this, I can't. Not alone. I'd forgotten how much this hurts. I only knew half their names, and I know Badger had four little kids back home, and I don't understand.

I don't understand.

And our steady true north fades

Snow lies thick on the moor, and Ed struggles to open his eyes in the morning. His feet are heavy, his mind moves slow, and he can't get warm. He sits as close to the fire in the common room as he can without setting his clothes aflame. Some mornings he sits with his hand on the black leather cover, but he doesn’t open the book.

We'll be just fine

There's a black and white photograph folded in with the thin paper, and there he is smiling up at them all, officer's cap set at a jaunty angle, shirtless with a bandage on one forearm. Peter hugs a scruffy looking mongrel dog close, hand rubbing the pointed ears, and Ed smiles back at the living shadow of his brother.

We'll be just fine

Warm spring sunshine splashes over Ed's face, and he leans on his spade, brushes mud off his hands, and surveys the dark turned earth of the school's Victory Garden, listens to the first formers laughing as they fling dirt clods at each other.

We'll be just fine

Come, behold the works of the Lord, what desolations he hath made in the earth.

He maketh wars to cease unto the end of the earth; he breaketh the bow, and cutteth the spear in sunder; he burneth the chariot in the fire... Peter writes.

We'll be just fine

Be still, and know that I am God: I will be exalted among the heathen, I will be exalted in the earth.

The Lord of hosts is with us; the God of Jacob is our refuge, Edmund answers.

I know that we will

"I miss him so much," Lucy says, and Edmund wraps his arm around her shoulders as they walk, remembering how he closed his last letter with those three words.

I just know that we will

He kneels by Peter's bed, his bed now, and the maps hang all round on the walls, he is surrounded by everywhere his brother is and was and could be, as he bows his head and the evening prayer comes weary and steady from his lips.

They used to say it together.

[clarenecessities]

18, 21, 29 for the fic ask?

18. What’s one of your favorite lines you’ve written in a fic?

Oh! So in my... closes my eyes. In my Miraculous Ladybug Princess Bride AU. I gave Nino his own backstory (and honestly, sometimes I still think I should go back and do the same for Alya). He was freakishly small for his age and the other kids all picked on him, but he was also a wet marshmallow of a boy and didn't want to fight back. His parents had to convince him to learn how.

Nino climbed up so that he was sitting on his father’s shoulders, looking down on everything. “You see, my darling,” said his father, smiling up at him, “it is alright to have help. Together we are taller than any man.”

I think about it sometimes, tbh. I really liked how that chapter turned out, even if I hate parts of it now. Honestly this is the point in the fic where the communist undertones passed the point of no return lmao. Damn I should really finish that one someday I'm like 5k deep in the last chapter

21. Have you ever deleted an entire scene after spending hours laboring over it? If so, why?

Oh dog constantly. I have a whole dumping ground for "are you sure? this is an entire scene bro" but I've never actually pulled anything from it. Most recently a bunch of Hordak exposition from the last chapter of Perfect, because like, it's fun, but it didn't serve the narrative.

“On crawling your way out of here and begging your brother to take you back?” Catra interrupted. “He doesn’t want you back. He sent you away to die.”  “Because he did not yet understand my utility,” said Hordak, bridling. “Once I have shown him the work I have accomplished in his name–”  “In his name?” Catra asked incredulously. “I’d never heard of Horde Prime until my future self started name-dropping. Do you think he’ll be happy that you never even mentioned him to your army of impressionable children?” For the first time, Hordak hesitated, looking back at Entrapta, then to the room behind her. His underlings were bundled up in ice and vines, all either unconscious or gagged. “Face it,” said Catra, brusque but less venomous than Adora had expected. There was a grim sympathy in the set of Catra’s mouth, the tension in her shoulders. “He’s not interested in your new ideas, or shaking things up, or whatever. It doesn’t matter if you have a different way of doing things, or cunning plans, or anything. All that matters is you’re not doing it his way.”  “Then I will accept his judgment,” Hordak said stiffly.  “No you won’t,” said Adora. “You haven’t yet, have you? He sent you to die in battle, but you’re still alive. I can’t even remember the last time you were in a battle.”  “That–he didn’t understand–”  “I thought Prime sees all?” said Catra. “Prime knows all?” “Silence!” snapped Hordak.

that went on for like another 800 words and like frankly, I could just knock him unconscious. boy we're getting real excerpty tonight huh

29. Share a bit from a fic you’ll never post OR from a scene that was cut from an already posted fic. (If you don’t have either, just share a random fic idea you have that you don’t plan on getting to.)

well shit. um. okay here, have some... oh, abandoned amnesia fic. those are always fun.

honestly this was more a series of unconnected scenes i thought would be fun. not exactly happy with it but shrug emoji

The first thing Adora noticed was the deep ache in her head, radiating from a point near her temple. Gradually, she catalogued other pains--her right shoulder, her abdomen, what felt like every single muscle.

She was laying in a bed, softer than she remembered the infirmary cots, but her aching body was hardly complaining. There was a familiar weight at her side, so whatever had taken her out didn’t hurt Catra badly enough to warrant her own bed. She was curled up over Adora’s good arm, face resting at the join of her neck and shoulder, her breath warm against Adora’s skin. Wait, skin? What was she wearing? 

Adora opened her eyes to check and immediately groaned at the light. Catra stirred instantly, shooting up to hover over her. 

“Adora?” she asked, tone soft but colored with anxiety. Wow, Adora must have really gotten her ass kicked. Catra always played off her concern. “Melog, go get Glimmer.” 

Melog? Glimmer? Whatever, Adora had other things to worry about. She squinted one eye open, Catra blurry but unmistakable above her. “What happened?”

“You lost a fight with a tree,” said Catra, relaxing marginally. She laughed a little breathlessly at Adora’s misfortune, leaning back. “Fuck, never do that again.”

Right. The tree. The skiff. 

“Me?” Adora groaned, closing her eye again. “You never do that again. How much trouble are we in?” 

“We?” asked Catra, in the same indignant tone Adora had used. “Oh no dummy, this one’s all you. You have been asleep for two days.” 

“Two days?” Adora squeaked, eyes flying open. “What about the raid?” 

“The--what?” asked Catra, clearly confused. 

Adora blinked, taking in the room. 

It was decidedly not the infirmary. 

“Where are we?” she asked, frowning. It was wide open, airy almost, all pastels and soft fabric. There were crystals, and blankets over the windows, and a waterfall in the corner, but Catra didn’t seem alarmed so Adora tried not to panic. 

Catra was staring at her with mounting concern, though, so she pushed herself up into a sitting position despite the screaming in her muscles. She was wearing some sort of pajamas, which explained her exposed skin but not how she’d gotten into them in the first place. And Catra’s clothes were… different. Looser. Softer. 

“Adora,” she said, holding her gaze, “What’s the last thing you remember?” 

“We were in the Whispering Woods,” said Adora, slowly. “We crashed the skiff, and I thought I saw… a sword?”

Catra visibly schooled her expression, leaning back so she was sitting up straight instead of hovering over Adora. She didn’t say anything.

“Catra, what is it?” Adora asked, anxiety growing with each second of silence. “Did I forget something?” 

Catra laughed, hollow and disbelieving. “Uh, yeah, you could say that.” 

“How much did I--”

Adora cut off with a yelp as a shower of sparkles exploded into being in the middle of the room, crystallizing into two people and a very large--cat? It looked like a cat. It had a weird, flowing mane that was undulating like a cloud of smoke, rapidly changing colors as it went. 

She was on her feet in an instant, staggering only a little as her legs got caught in the blanket. 

“Adora!” said the taller of the two, reaching towards her in an overeager grapple. She grabbed his arm, using his momentum against him, and flipped him over her hip. He went down easily, clearly not expecting the counter, and landed solidly on his back with a wheeze. 

“Catra, go! I’ll hold them off!” Adora barked, eyes narrowing as she turned her focus to the real threat. 

Princess. 

She didn’t look too tough. She was mostly gaping at her downed companion, looking between him and Adora like she couldn’t believe what she was seeing. 

“Adora, what--” 

She took a step forward, but the cat-thing cut in front of her, its mane a dark, twisting blue. It looked up at her plaintively. 

“I wouldn’t if I were you, Sparkles,” said Catra from behind her. Adora glanced back at her reprovingly. Of course she wouldn’t run. “Force Captain Adora here could kick your ass with one hand tied behind her back.” 

“Force Captain?” the princess--Sparkles?--repeated, brow creasing in confusion. Adora backed up, away from the companion, who had made no attempt to regain his feet. 

“You’re kidding,” he wheezed, looking up at Catra. 

Catra looked down at him, grim and unforgiving. Adora relaxed slightly. They could get out of this. They’d be okay. 

“I can only joke about brain damage so many times before the universe decides to punish me,” said Catra, holding out a hand and helping him up. Adora stared at her, aghast, but Catra just raised a challenging eyebrow and herded him back towards the princess. 

“Catra, what--?”

“Are you kidding me?” asked Sparkles, shrill. She stepped forward again, and this time the cat-thing let her go. She headed right for Catra, literally glowing with magic, and Adora’s heart stopped in her chest. 

She threw herself bodily between them, bulling the princess backwards with the unexpectedness of the move. Sparkles stumbled back towards the man and the cat-thing, eyes wide as Adora did her best to loom menacingly. 

“Stay away from her,” she growled, spreading her stance wider to shield more of Catra. 

“Adora!” said Sparkles, gaping up at her now. “Do you--Catra?” 

“Amnesia,” said Catra. Adora’s scowl deepened, though she didn’t take her eyes off the princess. Catra shouldn’t be broadcasting weak points like that. Why was she being so friendly with these people? How long had they been captured? “And somehow I don’t think she’s going to submit to anyone magicking her brain back to normal.”

Adora stiffened at the mention of magic, glancing down at the princess’s hands. No glow, but that didn’t always mean something. Shadow Weaver had plenty of potions and shades that did her bidding with no visible indication. Who knew what a monster like this would be capable of with that same power? 

“Okay,” said the man, slow and conciliatory, reaching out to reel the princess back to his side. “What about, you know, She-Ra?”

Adora’s headache throbbed. She bit back a wince. What the hell was She-Ra? Was that some kind of spell? Some new princessy torture method? She didn’t like the way he asked it, like it was an obvious solution to why she wasn’t just laying down and letting them experiment on her. 

“She doesn’t even know about She-Ra,” Catra groaned. “How did she figure it out the first time?” 

“Figure out what?” asked Adora, turning her head but locking eyes with Sparkles in case she tried anything. “Catra, what’s She-Ra?” 

“You’re She-Ra,” said Catra. “I’ll explain in a minute, okay?” 

She was being weirdly polite. Catra never explained herself if she could help it, let alone reassure Adora she would. Something was wrong. 

“It doesn’t matter how it happened the first time, the sword is gone,” said the man, shaking his head. “We should be focusing on how it works now.” 

“Somehow I don’t think that’s a viable option, Bow,” Catra huffed. 

“Why not?” asked Sparkles, bright and teasing. Adora shifted to allow Catra room to attack, but she didn’t so much as twitch. Something was very wrong. 

“She doesn’t… She thinks we’re still cadets!” said Catra. “Or at least that I am! She’s forgotten like six fucking years!” 

“What?” Adora gasped, finally tearing her eyes off the threat to stare at Catra. “Six years?” 

“Catra, just tell her,” said Sparkles. “We need She-Ra.”

Catra’s tail lashed behind her. “We need Adora to be comfortable,” she hissed. 

“She’d be a lot more comfortable with her memories,” Bow pointed out. 

“This is a terrible fucking idea,” Catra muttered, glancing back up and locking eyes with Adora. 

Adora sucked in a surprised breath as Catra advanced, standing far closer than she usually did, still staring into her eyes. She looked so serious. Almost scared, but that was stupid, Catra never got scared. Even when they’d been captured by a princess she kept her cool. She rested one hand on Adora’s waist, the other coming up to cradle her jaw. Adora’s chest felt tight, but she was frozen in place, wide-eyed and speechless as she watched Catra’s every movement.

“I love you,” said Catra, soft and earnest. 

Adora’s racing thoughts spun out, sputtering to a halt. 

“I’m in love with you,” Catra clarified, like Adora would have somehow misinterpreted that in conjunction with their position. “I always have been. I always will be. Could we--can I kiss you?” 

Adora stared at her wordlessly, half-expecting her to press forward regardless--Catra took what she wanted--but Catra just held her gaze and waited, patient and gentle and so unlike herself. 

Abruptly, Adora realized what was going on. 

She yanked out of Catra’s arms, launching herself at Sparkles, and tackled her to the ground. 

“What did you do to her?” she demanded, grabbing her by the collar and shaking. 

“What--” Sparkles tried, but her head was being rattled too much to get any further. 

“What did you do to her?” Adora demanded again, louder, more desperate. She didn’t know magic. She couldn’t undo this. Catra’s mind was at the mercy of a princess, and Adora--Adora couldn’t do anything to protect her. She’d already failed. “Undo it!” 

“Adora!” said Bow at her side, alarmed. “Adora, what--” 

“Here’s what’s going to happen,” Adora growled, holding Sparkles close enough that she could feel the flex of Adora’s arms against her, “You’re going to fix whatever fucking--princess mind control--bullshit you did to Catra, you’re going to tell me what She-Ra is, and then, you’re going to let us go, or else.”

“Adora,” said Catra from behind her, plainly exasperated. Adora didn’t react. She knew she was being reckless, taking this on alone, but--Catra would do it for her in a heartbeat. She had to fix this. 

“Or else what?” asked Sparkles. She didn’t sound petulant, as if surrendering, but genuinely curious. And scared. Adora was surprised how much she relished the thread of fear in her voice, the tacit concession. Maybe she wouldn’t have to fight; maybe the princess didn’t realize she’d only been Force Captain for a few hours. 

“Or else--or else I’ll make you,” she told Sparkles, swallowing. She couldn’t come up with specifics on the fly, but she hoped her sincerity made up for it. The princess certainly blanched as if it did. 

“Adora, nobody cast a spell on me,” said Catra, squatting down beside her. Adora didn’t look at her. Couldn’t, after she’d said… Adora’s cheeks felt hot, but she kept her gaze focused on the princess. 

“Don’t worry, Catra,” she assured, tightening her grip. “I’m--I’m going to fix this. It’s gonna be okay.” 

The weird, cat-like animal approached from Adora’s other side, trilling lightly. Its mane was forming weird, angular lines of cyan and turquoise, rippling over a kaleidoscope of colors. 

“Adora, you’re the one whose brain broke,” said Catra, apparently giving up and just sitting on the floor. She patted the princess’s shoulder reassuringly, making both Sparkles and Adora scowl. Sparkles twisted her head around to glare at Catra, but Adora yanked on her collar before she could actually address her. 

“What’d Melog say?” she asked anyway, craning her neck. 

“That you brought this on yourself and should have listened to me,” said Catra.

“Who’s Melog?” Adora asked suspiciously. The cat-thing meowed at her, moving its head as if to rub against her shoulder, but Adora shrank away suspiciously. Whatever this thing was, it was in league with the princess. She couldn’t let her guard down. 

“That’s Melog,” said Catra, as the cat--as Melog mewed dolefully. “They’re my… companion, I guess. You have Swift Wind, and I have Melog.” 

“What’s Swift Wind?” 

“The world’s stupidest horse.” 

“Horse?” asked Adora, frowning. 

“Hoo boy,” said Catra. “Do you guys have a picture dictionary or something? This might take a while.” 

“Yeah, let me go grab it,” Sparkles said sarcastically, gesturing at Adora’s hands, still buried in her collar.

“She wasn’t this scary last time,” said Bow, sitting on the ground where Adora could see him, well out of reach. “I mean yeah, we like, fought, but--she said she didn’t want to hurt us, remember? You didn’t believe her.” 

“Of course I didn’t believe her,” said Sparkles, not exactly indignant but a little offended, maybe? “She was a Horde soldier and she attacked us.” 

“To get the sword, which she did find first,” said Bow. 

“The sword?” Adora echoed, hesitating. “You saw it too?” 

“Oh we’ve all seen it,” said Catra, making a face. Adora looked at her uncertainly. “It’s gone, Adora. You got rid of it.” 

“Oh,” she said. That felt… wrong. Disappointing, almost. She was disappointing. 

“And of course she’s scarier this time,” Catra told Sparkles and Bow. “She thinks you mind-controlled her best friend. It’s a bit more to process than a bout of ‘finders keepers’.” 

“Adora, I promise I didn’t mind control Catra,” said Sparkles, exasperated from where Adora still had her pinned to the floor. “I don’t even know how to do that.” 

“Of course you don’t,” Adora spat. “You can’t even control your powers. But it’s the only--it had to have been you, subconsciously or something, so--so undo it, or I’ll make you.” 

“This is getting a little personal,” said Bow, tone placating as he raised his hands to show they were empty, scooting closer. Adora huffed a breath sharply through her nose, glowering at him. “How about you let Glimmer up and we leave you and Catra alone? You’re free to leave, if you want to.” 

Glimmer? Was her name not Sparkles? 

Whatever. It didn’t matter. 

“I’m not going anywhere until you fix Catra’s brain,” said Adora, but Catra was shaking her head and rolling her eyes and Adora slid backwards off the princess in spite of herself, following the implicit command. Even if Catra wasn’t fully herself, they could use some time alone. To brainstorm. 

“Okay,” said Bow, smiling. “Can we get you anything? Some food? Water? I know your doctor would appreciate it if you got back in the bed, but I understand if you aren’t comfortable with that right now.”

“No,” Adora said shortly. “Get out of here before I change my mind. This isn’t over.” 

Sparkles--Glimmer?--sighed melodramatically and slapped a hand to Bow’s knee, and they disappeared in a cloud of magic. 

“Are you okay?” Adora asked immediately, rising up on her knees to inspect Catra properly. No visible injuries, but magic didn’t always leave a mark. 

“We have to find Shadow Weaver,” she mumbled, half to herself, as she turned Catra’s head to either side to check for spell-burns. Catra recoiled, pulling out of her hands and hissing. The look on her face was something like betrayal, but Adora didn’t understand. Catra had her mind scrambled by princess magic. They needed a sorcerer to set it to rights, and Shadow Weaver was the only one they knew. 

“Seriously?” Catra demanded. She actually looked hurt, expression still so much more open than Adora was used to, and it made her falter, hands hovering uselessly in the space between them. “You want to let Shadow Weaver dig through my brain?” 

“Of course not!” said Adora. “But--Catra, I don’t know what else to do. What if they brainwashed you or something? I can’t--we can’t just let them--this isn’t right.” 

“Is it that hard to believe?” Catra asked, petulant now. She wrapped her arms around herself, leaning into Melog as it--they?--pressed into her shoulder. “They’re our friends, Adora. The Horde… it wasn’t what they said it was.” 

“Was?” Adora whispered, freezing. Catra grimaced.

“Disbanded a few years ago. There was… Things escalated. Hordak came around eventually, and you were able to save him.” 

“Save him?”

“Ugh, what are you, an echo chamber? Yeah, you saved him. His superior came to town and tried to destroy the fucking universe so he could… I don’t know. Reset it? Didn’t make any fucking sense,” said Catra. She wasn’t looking at Adora. 

“So I… I helped Hordak,” said Adora, slowly. Okay. So she was still loyal to the Horde, it was just--their methodology had changed, or something. She looked around the room again, taking in the ostentatious shapes and colors. The furniture all looked so soft, as soft as Catra’s new clothes. It was a stark contrast to the utilitarian styles Adora was more familiar with, and she couldn’t quite reconcile it with the idea of order. “He has a superior?” 

“Had,” Catra corrected. Melog shuddered at her side, mane flaring a sharp and agitated orange. Adora stared at them for a moment, surprised. Was their mane responding to Catra’s voice? “He’s gone. He’s never coming back.” 

No Horde, no leader, and Catra thought she was… interested. 

In Adora. 

“Who do we report to?” she asked, shaking her head as if it would physically diffuse her blush. “Hordak?” 

Catra barked out a laugh, in the same instant Melog’s mane turned a vibrant cerulean. Interesting--maybe it responded to tone as well. The different colors meant different things. 

“As if!” Catra managed, laughing so hard she had to unwind her arms and lean on Melog for support, her eyes sparkling when she blinked them open. Adora smiled just watching her, even having no idea what was so funny; she couldn’t remember the last time she’d heard Catra laugh like this. Maybe a few cackles at other people’s expense now and again, but this was downright joyful. “We don’t report to anybody. I mean, Glimmer is like, in charge, technically, but--I mean, come on. You saw her.” 

“I--the princess?” asked Adora, horrified. 

“Queen,” Catra corrected, smirking at the look on her face. “What’s the matter, Adora? Scared?” 

“You should be!” said Adora. “Don’t you see what she’s doing? She brainwashed you into following her orders so she can use you!” 

She was expecting Melog to turn red again--Catra had never dealt well with accusations, and she was almost certainly about to start shouting--but they stayed a placid shade of blue, though the shape got a little curlier. It almost seemed… amused. 

“I wish you remembered enough to know how ironic that was to say,” said Catra, after a moment. Melog’s mane didn’t change, so maybe it wasn’t tone. Maybe they just responded to Catra’s mood, somehow. Pheromones or something? 

“What?” said Adora. 

“Ironic,” Catra said slowly, like Adora just hadn’t understood the word. “Like somebody who’s been brainwashed into obedience telling you you’ve been brainwashed into obedience. Seriously, Adora? You think I’d take orders from Sparkles?” 

“I--if you’ve been--she’s a princess, Catra! You can’t trust her! Especially not when she’s messing with your mind.” 

“Look, I’ve done the whole ‘mind control’ thing,” said Catra, waving a hand as if she could dispel the horror that elicited. Melog’s mane shrunk closer to their body, turning a sickly shade of green that matched the queasiness Adora felt. “Forget altering perceptions, we’re talking full-on puppet mode, but the puppeteer’s coming from inside the house.” 

“Catra--” 

“I need you to be honest with yourself,” Catra interrupted. “Do I seem unhappy? Beyond general concern over your dumb ass getting amnesia?” 

“I--no?” Adora said uncertainly. Kind of the opposite, really. She was so happy she was like a different person. 

“Am I some kind of princess-worshipping sycophant?” 

“No,” mumbled Adora. She’d been very rude both to and about the princesses. “But--”

“You can accept that it’s the future, that the Horde is gone, that I have a fucking alien keyed into my emotions, but you can’t accept that I’m in love with you.”

Adora flushed again at hearing the words. “It--no. I can’t.” 

“Why not?” asked Catra. Adora risked a glance at her, lured by the resignation in her tone. She looked almost… sad. 

“What--I mean--Catra, come on,” Adora spluttered. “You’re not--You definitely haven’t always been. I think I would have noticed if--if that.” 

“Say it,” said Catra, meeting her eyes, expression smoothing out. 

“Say--?”

“Say I’m in love with you. Even if you’re denying it.” 

“You’re--you’re not--you aren’t in love with me,” Adora mumbled, looking away again. Her cheeks felt hot. “That’s--She’s just trying to--You aren’t.”

“Why?” 

Adora blinked, looking back up at her, only to instantly avert her eyes. She shrugged, tangling her fingers in her lap. 

“Adora, why not? Why couldn’t I be?” 

“You just couldn’t,” said Adora. “Maybe she can’t mess with my mind while I have amnesia, or something, so she’s trying to get to me through you? She thinks I’ll give in if you--um.” 

“Because you want this,” said Catra, smug. “You want me to be in love with you.” 

“That’s--no!” Adora spluttered. “Not if it isn’t you!"

Catra smiled at her, soft again, her whole face warm and affectionate. Her arms had loosened from her torso, simply crossed over her chest now. “But if I were me. If I weren’t being mind controlled, and I was free to make my own choices, and feel my own feelings. You’d want that.” 

Adora looked away again, blinking away the sudden heat behind her eyes. “It doesn’t matter,” she mumbled. “It wouldn’t even… It would just be…”

[miraiq]

How should one act when faced with the dead..? | @crimsonbesotted spoilers for 2.1

This.. wasn't right. There's no way it could be really happening.. They were allies now, though slightly reluctant out of the method in which they became such, weren't they..? So why.. why was Aventurine calling out for a fight on a live broadcast? Why was Aventurine outing Caelus as a being hosting a Stellaron to the habitants of Penacony? Sure the blond had known of Caelus' true nature, having called him out on it in private almost as if as a threat, but the Trailblazer never imagined that it would be placed out on the gambler's table with all his other cards, being made public. Then Aventurine starts to fight them? So are they no longer companions? Guess not anymore, what with all the vicious strikes the silver has to block with his lance lest he or his Express Crew family be severely injured. The lad just simply could not wrap his head around the twists and turns and lies being put on the forefront.. guess that's why he's not one in charge of strategy huh.

The fight doesn't last long, but it's lengthy enough that Caelus feels the exhaustion catching up to him, using his lance to keep him at the very least standing. The silver is just about to muster up his energy to take another go at trying to land an impactful hit against Aventurine when he hears a woman's deep voice behind him.. one that he recognizes as Archeron, or the "Emanator" as the blond had put it. He processes her saying "I'm sorry" before he feels his body tense up and ends up passing out.

It's a weird sensation.. glancing around a blank and dark space surrounding two individuals that are so tiny one can't make out the identities, almost as if watching them from a birds' eye view. He can't hear what's being said, nor does see what's going on between them. Caelus does however catch very quick glimpses at paused memories, as if staring at a picture- but it's just blurry enough to not be able to pick out the details and it's frustrating. He feels like screaming. Screaming so loud that someone would get fed up and just tell him what the hell was going on. Before he can though, the silver can tell that a third party has joined the other two that were standing, and all color seems to fade out into black nothingness.

He startles awake, eyes jumping open as his breathing is rapid and out of control. Further confused, and now disoriented along with feeling like he got hit by another tram car (and once was enough thank you), Caelus holds his head as he scans around the area trying to figure out just where he was now. The area is familiar enough, as it was the same place they were at when he had fallen unconscious (or so he assumes had happened)-- but there's a significant change. The sky.. is no longer colorful and sparkling... now it's bleak and grey and there's a large red slash through the dome of the theater. When did that happen..? He'd remember such destruction occurring if it was during the fight--- wait... what happened to the fight? It seemed he wasn't the only one that was affected, as March, Himeko, and Welt were all similarly on the ground and not awake- though alive, he can tell.. but where we the other two? Where was Acheron and Aventurine? What the hell just happened? We're they just all in one big dream together about fighting the individual they had all agreed to co-operate with..? Before Caelus could even process that thought and accept it as what had occurred, the lad let his gaze fall from the broken dome framing the sky to the stage on the ground where he saw a recognizable light blue color in the shape of a circle surrounded by smaller circles-- his heart stopped. He knew what that was.

" No... No way..... No no nononono-- "

Scrambling to his feet, Caelus dashed as fast as his aching feet could move him, pushing passed a few individuals who were seemingly working on cleaning up the area and fix the damage, before dropping to his knees right in front of the floating object. A dream bubble.. What was worse? The semi clear liquid staining the floor just underneath it.. the same exact secretion that was produced when Caelus had watched Firefly----

" No.. No it wasn't.. wasn't supposed to be like this.. "

They could have talked things out-- could have cleared up misunderstandings, could have brought the Family to justice like they planned.. not.. not this. Hands frantically pat around the puddle, hoping it to be fake-- a prop made for the stage.. surely that was it.. yeah... had to be.. He felt a disturbed laugh catch in his throat, hands come up for him to stare at the liquid dripping down his forearms- the tears hanging at the corners of his eyes burning his soul. Something starts moving towards him, and it takes a moment through the fuzzy lining of his vision, shaking hands hesitantly reaching for the Dream Bubble that was drifting down. The moment it gets close enough, the light inside the circle pulses like a resting heartbeat as it collides with Caelus' body, his entire being going cold.

All those blurry images that had flashed to him were now clear.. It showed him what had occurred just out of his reach, showed him pain that he would never be able to understand, showed him just how far one man was willing to go to win his gamble. How far one man would go to have his freedom. Teardrops gathering on his eyes fell freely now, no longer able to hold himself together as he leans forward, curling in on himself as sobs shake his very core. All Caelus can do is pathetically wail out-- to whom? The Aeons? What could they do when the damage has already been done?

" Why... Why didn't you.. you just.. tell me... Why, you--- "

Lad chokes with the constriction of his throat, fighting against himself to be able to even breathe properly. Is that why Aventurine had acted the way he did..? Made it so they wouldn't be devasted should he not come out alive at the end of his game? Is that why there was so much uneasy back and forth of trying to gain their trust but also keep them at a distance so they never learned more than what the gambler had wanted them to know?

" We would have helped.. from the beginning.. if you just.. told us the truth.. you could still be.. be.... I'm so sorry.. I should have agreed to co-operate with you sooner.. maybe then.. then you ... you wouldn't.... "

Arms encircle it's own body, attempting the mimic of comfort that the lad so desperately needed while trying to hold onto what remained of the dream bubble. He'd seen to much tragedy since first waking up all those months ago.. Too many deaths had he witness, or even assisted reluctantly in, since the moment that the Express stepped foot onto Penacony.. Some land of wonderful dreams and harmony. What a joke.. It was then Caelus had come to a decision. Though Aventurine painted himself in a villainous light, Caelus now knew the truth.. and he was going to preserve that truth. He will not let the man go down in history with such a stain when he knew it was all just a show.. a play, extravagant and over the top, all while being watched on the stage of Penacony.

Hiccups interrupt his new mantra every few repeats, shoulders slumped and shivering as lad shakes his head in disbelief.

" I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm sorry I'm so sorry I'm so so sorry I'm sorry-- "

[1yuuki3]

All because of a stomach ache

Fated to Love You Genre: Strangers to lovers, Fluff, Angst, YoongixReader

TW: none

A/N: Cross posted on wattpad, Chapter contains both Yoongi and Y/N's pov

Wc: 1355 words

Synopsis: You were never one to believe in fate, You're life was made up of plans and bullet points , Organized to the very end. Until fate played a cruel joke and left your life in shambles. Nursing a broken heart in Spain, will this make you change your view on love and fate?

Yoongi and the others were waiting in the conference room for the mysterious producer to arrive.

"I'm hungry,can we order something?" A boy with doe eyes and bunny smile asked.

"You're always hungry Jungkook" Jin replied laughing.

Before he can even make a reply. The door to the conference room suddenly opened.

Time at that very moment felt very slow for Yoongi. He didn't even notice that he was holding his breathe in anticipation. When a young man entered the room.

"Hi? Are you the new producer?" Jin asked.

"No sir, I just came here to tell you that there was a mixed up and the meeting is moved on Friday" The young man answered.

"Oh" was the only thing that escaped Yoongi's lips. Frustrated was an understatement.

"Who are you expecting you coward?You had your chance, but you didn't take it" Yoongi thought.

Jin sensing the change in Yoongi's demeanor gently said "Let's go eat ramen, my treat"

And the room erupted with cheers and laughter as the seven boys went out to eat.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N's and Yoongi's POV:

"Y/N how was your first day of work?" Your father asked.

Days like this when you are together eating are rare, since he is busy with managing the company.

"It's on Friday dad" Y/N replied.

"Oh! I thought it was today?" confusion clearly etched on his face.

"It was supposed to be today, but Mr. Bang had a prior engagement, the schedule got mixed up" You replied, before going back to your meal.

You were excited to meet the group you were working with. The management and Mr.Bang were telling you how talented and hard-working they are. And when you got the call that the meeting was rescheduled, you felt a little sad.

To distract yourself, you decided to bake cookies to bring on Friday to give to them, and hopefully they won't eat you alive.

Even with you being one of the end demand producers, you still have a episodes in which you feel insecure, and when this happens you stress bake to calm your nerves.

The days passed and you noticed it's already Friday. "The day"as your friend Aya jokingly calls it.

She's still off somewhere doing her modelling gigs and you miss her and her laugh.

Lost in thought, You didn't even notice you're already standing in front of BH Entertainment Office.

No one even spared a glance at you, with your baggy pants and oversized shirt carrying a bag full of cookies and coffee in one hand, You look like an intern among the serious looking people in suits.

You took a deep breathe and thought "This is it, my new chapter" .

You were welcomed with a warm smile by the receptionist and lead you towards the conference room.

You don't know why your heart was beating fast, could it be excitement or something else? If you learned something in that night with Yoongi in Spain. It's that everything happens for a reason and nothing is ever a coincidence.

You smiled, as you remember his gummy smile that makes his eyes disappear, and wondered if he's doing ok.

You were pulled out of your reverie by the receptionist tapping you on your shoulder.

"Ms. Y/N we're here" She said with a smile.

As she opened the door, you were greeted by six chaotic boys fighting over the last piece of chicken.

You can't help but laugh out loud and that caught their attention. All eyes were on you and you felt like a specimen under a microscope.

"Hi, I'm Namjoom" a blue haired guy, with eyes that can pierce your soul said.

"I'm Seokjin, Worldwide handsome, you know" with a wink and a smile from the most prettiest lips that you saw.

"Hyung,stop that, you're embarrasing us" with a deep voice and boxy smile said "I'm Taehyung"

ou feel the sincerity and welcome in their voices and you knew right there and then that you made the right decision.

"Hi I'm Hoseok" A guy that can be like a sunshine on earth said.

"Hi, I'm Jimin" another one shyly said, whose voice can make any girl swoon.

"Me!Me!, Hi Noona! My name is Jungkook" A doe eyed boy looked excitedly at you. "Are you the new producer?" he asked.

You couldn't help but be infected with his energy and smile.

"Yes, Hi I'm Y/N the new producer" You said with a bow. "Are you the team I will be working with?" You asked while looking at them.

"Yes, that is correct, but we still lack one member, he just went out" Seokjin replied.

"I bought cookies and coffee for you guys" You quietly said.

The room burst with joyous screams and thank you's as they took the cookies from you.

And this is how Yoongi saw the guys as he entered the room. Mouth full of cookies and talking.Jungkook said with a mouthful of cookies "Hyung, you should try these cookies Y/N noona bought".

Yoongi felt like cold water was poured all over his body at the mention of your name. Could it be? Is this the universe's way of giving him a second chance?

Yoongi scanned the room,looking for your familiar face but you were nowhere to be found. Namjoon noticing this said

"She already went home hyung, but she'll be back again tomorrow"

"What happened hyung?what took you so long?" Jimin asked

"I got a stomach ache, that's why It took me this long" Yoongi replied

He used this excuse to leave the guys and went to his studio, thinking that the universe is still mad at him for being a coward and making him miss the chance to see you again.

He then poured his heart our doing what he do best and that is to write.

I was lost in translation when we met

Funny how the universe plays.

You helped me,when you could have left.

A cold drink, for a thirsty soul,

You ignited a fire that I thought was gone.

Drowning in darkness, A solitude I welcomed.

But you took my hand and along with it my heart.

I won't say this is love,

But I know that what we had was kismet.

A meeting of souls, in this vast ocean,

Two lonely comets in the milky way.

Will our paths cross again?

Will you still remember me?

If ever you see me again.

Or will I just be a memory long forgotten.

Yoongi sighed deeply, cursing himself

"Of all the days to have a stomach ache, aish!"

He laughed bitterly with his stroke of bad luck, seriously thinking of sending you a message over social media, but erasing it, too scared to even press the send button.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Y/N's POV:

You felt happy and was even humming a tune on your way home. Meeting the boys felt like having younger brothers, something you never experienced, since you were an only child.

You felt sad because you've missed meeting the 7th member of the group. You had to catch the bus or you'll end up walking home.

Your dad is annoyed, why you don't want to use his car. You explained to him that it's expensive owning a vehicle and you just started your job.

They even added you in their group chat, so they can contact you anytime.

The management stipulated you would also be one of the group's manager, to create a bond with the group. After meeting the guys you made your decision of accepting the offer to be one of their manager's aside from being an in-house producer.

Your phone rang with notifications coming from the boys after they added you in their group chat.

Namjoon: Noona! Update us when you get home

Jungkook: Noona!thanks for the cookies.

Y/N: already on the bus,thanks for the welcome guys

Jimin: You should have allowed us to bring you home.

Y/N: maybe next time :) you guys need rest

Taehyung: Yeah! Next time we'll bring you home.

Jin: we should hang out all of us

Hoseok: dinner would be fun, right? what do you say Yoongi hyung?

Yoongi: yeah, sure..

You could couldn't believe your eyes, Could it be? Could this be your Yoongi? Did fate really exist? You almost missed your stop, because you're trying to process the information that you had.

You almost bumped into your father not realizing you are already home. You hurriedly took your phone out to update them.

Y/N: I'm home guys, dinner sounds great, see you tomorrow :)

Tomorrow would be interesting you thought to yourself, as you will yourself to sleep.

[callsign-bunnie]

A sequel to "lets play a game" is requested and required.

Please, please, please say Rodolfo isn't dead yet!

Sorry this took so long to write! This is a part 2 to this

--

Rodolfo woke up to a bright blue sky above him and wait on his stomach. He groaned, feeling icy coldness on his exposed skin. Snow. He recognized the feeling immediately. No... not again.

Dread filled his stomach. It seeped deep into his rib cage and he wanted to scream. He couldn't go through this again.

The weight on his stomach suddenly lifted and he was met with Gaz's eyes staring into his own. "Rodolfo! You're alive!" His voice was rough and his eyes were drooped slowly.

"Yeah... Wish I wasn't..." Rodolfo groaned. "Fuck."

The imagery from before came back to him. Luiz holding a gun in front of his head. Luiz pulling the trigger and then stabbing something into his wrist. He'd shot his chest and then... well, if he had to guess, he'd tranquilized him.

Gaz helped him up. Rodolfo touched his chest, where the bullet wound was supposed to be, only feeling thick bandaging and sharp pain. "Did you bandage me?"

"No." Gaz shook his head, sitting on the ground nearby to him. They were surrounded by snow and Rodolfo could make out a tub nearby. He recognized where they were as the mountains, but he was not familiar with this area.

So, Luiz had bandaged him. Why? Was there any point in trying to make sense of it? They were stranded in the mountain with nothing. They'd both been given coats from the look of it and he hoped there were... some supplies in that tub but... Why were they up there?

Gaz's eyes followed Rodolfo's to the tub and he went to it. "Please don't have a bomb in there..." he mumbled before slowly opening the tub. Thankfully, it didn't immediately explode.

Rodolfo gingerly moved over, trying to ignore the dull ache in all of his bones as he did so. He looked in the box, frowning when he saw a gun and a case of water. "We're part of another game..." He realized, pulling out the dried foods.

Gaz looked confused. "A game?"

"Yes." Rodolfo knew what was going on. "Luiz loves games." Valeria had complained about it quite a bit.

"Why?" Gaz touched the guns and then pulled them out, running his fingers over them. He started to check them. They were simple hunting rifles. Civilian hunting rifles.

Rodolfo shook his head. "He's taunting Alejandro. Price too, likely, since you're still here and not dead or sent back. He'll send them clues about where we are and they'll have to find us. We have to survive long enough for them to... or figure out how to get back."

Gaz unpacked the tub more, finding two sleeping bags and a tarp in the bottom of it. Along with various other supplies. Fishing wire, two knives, a firestarter kit. "Do you know how to survive up here?"

"Intimately." Rodolfo muttered. "I got stranded up here as a teenager. Had to survive for two weeks with nothing but some random supplies I found in a cabin and a bunch of rotten meat. It was winter, then, too. Luiz would know about it. I have no doubt Valeria told him."

He decided not to mention that Luiz was likely doing this to taunt Valeria, too. He had a good feeling this had just as much to do with her as Alejandro. "Alejandro is going to lose it..." Rodolfo lamented. Alejandro didn't have the best of temper at the best of times.

This was not going to be the best of times.

"I don't think Luiz understands the bear he was poking." Gaz murmured, staring at the box thoughtfully. "If Price or Alejandro don't kill him, I will."

Rodolfo nodded in agreement. "We need to find a safe space to set up shelter. Preferably somewhere like under a giant rock. There are lots of those up here. From there, I can figure out how to best set up this shelter."

Gaz nodded. "I will drag this tub. Since you were shot, still."

Rodolfo nodded. He would protest but he knew he was in no shape to argue with Gaz, since moving his arms at all was hell. They tugged at the wound.

He stood as well with Gaz and glanced around. He used the sun to orient himself south and they headed that way. They very easily found a giant rock, one that fortunately was shaped in such a way that where they made shelter would cause there to be a ledge over them. That ended up being two sides covered. Rodolfo would only have to account for two more with the tarp.

It was easy. He had Gaz locate two giant stones and oriented the tarp in such a way that it curved around half of the ledge. There was enough room for them to both set out their sleeping bags and shove the tub inside.

Rodolfo let Gaz sleep near the stone since he was taller and needed more room. "We'll need to sleep in watches. There's wolves and other animals up here."

"Noted." Gaz nodded. "I will take longer watches due to your injuries. Fuck, is there any first aid in here?" He dug through the tub, relaxing when he pulled out a first aid kid. It was a pretty decent sized one, too.

Rodolfo furrowed his brows. "He wants us to survive."

"Or he's being really fucking cruel in how he kills us." Gaz muttered.

-

Rodolfo took first sleep, since he needed it. Plus, Gaz didn't feel safe enough to sleep yet, apparently. Rodolfo did not mind. His body was exhausted. Once they'd found enough dry wood to build a fire, they had set it up

However, he woke up in a cold sweat from a nightmare. Gaz was still sitting in front of the fire and it looked well maintained. They'd used the lid of the tub to make an area to keep their extra dry wood.

Rodolfo couldn't remember what the nightmare was about. He never could. He moved over to Gaz, wincing at a dull ache in his chest. He was cold, he wanted the fire. "Anything eventful happen?"

Gaz frowned, clearly startled. "You should go back to sleep."

"Give me a moment," Rodolfo shook his head, warming his hands over the fire. "Anyway, answer my question, hermano."

Gaz shrugged. "A few animals seemed curious but... none stayed. I was tempted to shoot a fat rabbit that came by but... I worried the gunshot would wake you up."

Rodolfo nodded, since it likely would have. And he would not have been a happy camper. "Fair."

Gaz stared into the fire. "What if they've told them we're dead and no one is coming?"

Rodolfo winced. He hadn't wanted to let the thought cross his mind. "I doubt we would have gotten all of these supplies if that was the case."

"What if we aren't part of the game, what if we're playing it?"

Rodolfo watched Gaz speak. He looked... dejected almost. "Well... there's nothing we can do about it, in that case. We still have to survive up here for as long as we can."

Gaz hesitated and then seemed to relax. He nodded. "You're right. We do. Even if we aren't being rescued, I'd rather last as long as I could, first."

Rodolfo relaxed, glad he'd managed to reassure Gaz. "Good." He settled fully next to him. "Tomorrow, we need to figure out food. After your sleep cycle, we'll see what food they've given us and probably hunt some kind of dinner. It's still early enough in the season that some animals will still be out, as you've seen. Have you ever hunted before?"

"Once with Price..." Gaz nodded and frowned. "It was pretty difficult."

Rodolfo couldn't help agreeing, since hunting was difficult. At least they had knives and guns, Rodolfo had had to use a rock. "There will be rabbits and birds to hunt. We will hunt those tomorrow, if it is necessary."

"You should go back to bed." Gaz nodded and Rodolfo had to reluctantly agree. He was exhausted. So, he clambered back over to his sleeping back, climbed in, and fell asleep.

-

When he woke up, next, the sun was out. Gaz was going through everything they had in the tub and he was making marks on the side of the tub with a charred stick.

Smart. Rodolfo was impressed.

"What all do we have?" He asked, looking over everything.

"Firestarter kit, a box of crackers, a sack of dried meat sticks, a whole crate of water, a weird pan thing which I think is meant to be a kettle, likely to boil water in, some cans of food without labels, two knives, fishing wire, and a little lamp thingy." He pointed to where it sat on the tub, which was now on it's side.

Rodolfo nodded. "We will definitely need to hunt if we're meant to be up here long term. That small amount of food isn't going to cut it, even if we stretch it to our limits."

Gaz nodded in agreement. "I think the cans are vegetables. They gave us five of those. They can be used every other day, honestly. That's ten days of food, there. The meat sticks are kind of thick but still not enough to satiate anything. 10 of those. Save those for if we can't find food to hunt. And the crackers can fill in the hunger spots."

"You have experience with stretching food?" Rodolfo tilted his head, now curious how he'd managed to come up with that system so easily.

Gaz shrugged. "I was a poor orphan."

Rodolfo nodded, since yeah that would give experience. "The crate of water should last us if we're careful. But, you're right about the pan. We can use it to boil water, and heat up food."

He picked up the pan thing. It was very old looking, but it was clean, and it'd do the job. "Soups will be our best friend, I think. If those cans are vegetables, the juice will be thick, which is good." He'd found a soup pan in that old cabin and had survived off of meat soup for the most part. It was an easy way to cook the meat and easy to consume.

"Great." Gaz snorted and sighed. "Alright, can I take my sleep, now?"

Rodolfo smiled and nodded. "Yes." He watched Gaz lay down to sleep and then sighed, moving over to the opening of the little cave they'd made. He stood to stretch his legs and looked around, hoping to recognize the area at all.

He and Alejandro knew the mountains intimately, but even still... nothing. He didn't recognize a single tree.

Damnit.

He surveyed the area, still, making sure to stay near their camp. There was a small stream nearby, which he saw fish swimming in. It wasn't frozen over, thankfully. This was good. He could catch fish by hand if they couldn't manage to hunt anything.

After getting stranded, he'd been so shaken up, that he'd spent a considerable amount of time learning everything he could about foraging. So, he'd be able to do that as well.

He was so grateful it was still early in the season, as there were plants everywhere. He could recognize several of them as edible. They'd be able to survive for a little bit.

All they needed was however long it took Alejandro and Price to find them. That's it. As long as they could survive that long...

It wasn’t going to be a fun survival by any means, but it would be survival.

He gathered up some dry wood he found, finding a decent amount of it. Heat was going to be priority number one. They could both probably survive a decent amount of time with no food but... hypothermia killed fast. They would desperately need to stay warm.

He took the wood back to the lid of the tub, arranging it neatly so his hands had something to do. Then, he sorted their food into rations and rearranged everything neatly back in the tub.

He made sure the guns were properly loaded and then he set up a snare a small distance away with the fishing wire, hoping it would catch something. When he was done with all of that, Gaz was starting to wake up, and so he grabbed one of the guns. They shared a meat stick and then Rodolfo set out to teach Gaz how to hunt.

They ended up taking down a few squirrels. Rodolfo found some solid wood and they set up a roasting spit for them. It wasn’t a very good roasting spit, but it would do the job, at least.

Gaz had not appreciated the skinning process, making several disgusted faces that Rodolfo couldn’t help laughing at. But, he’d dutifully helped. Gaz hadn’t tried to back out or say no at all. He’d only cringed or made a face, which hey, Rodolfo would accept.

When nightfall finally came, they had a whole roasted squirrel to share and a small feeling of accomplishment. Rodolfo had found some mushrooms he knew for a fact were safe to eat and they’d roasted them as well and ate them with the squirrel. 

“You really know how to survive up here..” Gaz seemed impressed.

“Yes. I, unfortunately, learned by being thrown off the deep end.” Rodolfo shrugged. He had made sure to stay up on his knowledge and he’d made it mandatory that the Vaqueros learn how to survive in the winter as well as the summer in the mountains.

Gaz nodded. “It’s... impressive.” He offered a small smile before sighing. “I’m already sick of it up here.”

“Me too.” Rodolfo admitted. He already missed his bed.

Gaz seemed to hesitate. “Your bandaging needs to be checked.”

Rodolfo winced, since he was correct. “Let me finish eating and I will.”

“Let me do it. I will be able to see the wound better.” Gaz frowned.

Rodolfo hesitated before nodding, relenting. Gaz would definitely be able to see it better. “Alright. But once I finish eating.” So they settled into eating in silence. Gaz looked deep in thought and Rodolfo didn’t want to interrupt that.

It was a calm silence. Both seemed to be trying to not think about the situation too hard. Rodolfo knew it wouldn’t lead to anything good.

When Rodolfo finished eating, Gaz moved over and carefully helped Rodolfo peel off his coat and then his shirt. Rodolfo stayed close to the fire, already freezing cold.

Gaz was gentle with the bandaging as he unwrapped it. He got the first aid kit and used some water to clean it with a clean spot of the old bandaging. Rodolfo sat patiently while Gaz redressed it.

It hurt like hell, but it wasn’t anything Rodolfo wasn’t used to. He’d been shot so many times. He still woke up to burning pain in his shoulder from where he’d once been shot off a roof by Valeria and caught so violently that it yanked his arm from the socket.

So, he had no trouble just sitting and handling the pain while Gaz patched the wound back up. “They stitched it up.” He explained and Rodolfo nodded a little. “There’s not much for me to do besides clean it and then bandage it back up.”

“Good.” Rodolfo was very glad. He yawned, carefully. “I guess it’s time for my sleep cycle.”

“Sleep well, Rodolfo.” Gaz nodded and pat his arm. Rodolfo informed him that he would try and moved to his sleeping back and curled up tightly.

-

Day three and Rodolfo was already sick of being there. Gaz seemed like he was as well. Both had been mostly quiet, just kind of taking their sleep cycle and watch cycles. 

Having to stretch food was already wearing on Rodolfo’s stomach. Gaz kept trying to give him more because he was injured, but Rodolfo didn’t want that. He knew Gaz was likely just as hungry, so he wouldn’t let that happen.

Gaz would also ask Rodolfo before doing anything and Rodolfo had at first decided it was likely because Rodolfo had experience out here but... No, the more they talked, he realized that Gaz saw Rodolfo as a superior when he slipped up and called him sir.

They didn’t need some stupid hierarchy causing resentment out here. So, Rodolfo shut that down.

“Yes, sir.” Gaz had responded and then immediately winced.

Rodolfo shook his head. “Don’t call me that. Neither of us are superior or inferior out here.”

“You outrank me-”

Rodolfo laughed. “Look around! We are surrounded by trees and snow and ice and... animals! There are no ranks out here.” He shook his head, pointing to outside of their shelter. 

Gaz winced and looked out before sighing. “You’re right... I’m sorry, I’m just so used to running missions with Price that I...” He seemed to hesitate. “It’s almost easier, you know? To pretend this is just another mission...”

Rodolfo frowned and then he softened, feeling bad for him. Rodolfo certainly was not handling this well and he’d done this before... He couldn’t imagine how poor Gaz was doing. “You’re right. It probably is easier for you but... Look, you don’t have to run everything by me. As long as the decision doesn’t fuck us both over, or has a chance of fucking us both over, you can make it. Got it?”

Gaz seemed to again hesitate and then he was nodding. “Alright.”

“Call me Rudy, if it makes it easier. Everyone else does.” Rodolfo nodded. “Rodolfo can be a mouthful.”

“I don’t think it is.” Gaz shrugged. “But I can call you Rudy.” He smiled a little. “Do we still have that other squirrel?”

Rodolfo nodded. He’d packed it into a mound of snow. 

After skinning it, they again cooked it. Rodolfo already missed real food. Good, seasoned food. He winced at some pain in his chest and rubbed at it, taking a deep breath. Luiz had shot him in an area that wouldn’t do any damage. He’d clearly calculated it.

But... this pain was different. He took a deep breath and tried to ignore it. It was probably time to reclean the wound, anyway, so when they were done eating, he’d do that. 

Gaz glanced at him, clearly concerned, but he didn’t bring it up. “Can I admit something?”

“Sure.” Rodolfo raised an eyebrow.

“This is so fucking boring!” Gaz blurt out, his face flaming red. “I didn’t realize how fucking boring survival is!”

Rodolfo laughed loudly. He couldn’t help it. That was the funniest statement he’d heard come out of that kid’s mouth. And... it was true! It was so fucking boring. That’d been part of the struggle when he was a teenager surviving this shit. 

He’d been so bored in between hunting for food or trying not to freeze to death. He’d had nothing to do, absolutely nothing, and it had been hell. Living in one’s own brain was... not fun. 

“Yeah, well at least you have me to talk to. When I was teenager, it was just me and some birds.” Rodolfo pointed out.

Gaz laughed and nodded. “That’s true. We could do like they do in movies and you could sing while I whistle.”

Rodolfo laughed. “Why do you assume I can sing?”

“Alejandro brags about it.” Gaz flushed. “He wouldn’t shut up about it when he, Ghost, and I went to the bar that one time.”

Rodolfo felt his face turn dark red and he smiled at the fire. “Oh...” He hadn’t quite known just how much Alejandro bragged about him until the 141 had gotten there. Soap complained about it a lot. 

God, he loved his husband so much. “Yeah, I sing. Kind of. Not sure I want to risk waking up any wolves, though.”

Gaz chuckled and nodded. “That’s fair. I’d like them to stay away as well.” He sighed. “Let me change that bandaging and then you should sleep...” He paused and then added, “Rudy.”

Rodolfo laughed. “Alright, Gaz.” He got situated so Gaz could change his bandaging, wincing again as Gaz peeled off the bandaging.

Gaz froze and Rodolfo frowned deeply. He didn’t bother looking as he knew he wouldn’t get a good look. “Um... what does infection look like?”

Rodolfo tensed, trying not to panic. “Swollen... puss, red streaks.”

“We need to start changing this every day.” Gaz quickly got to work. “You’re not quite there but... it’s a risk.”

Rodolfo took deep breaths to stay calm. “Alright.” He closed his eyes. But, he didn’t think the bandages would last long enough. Alejandro would have to get them in the next week if they were going to chance them every day.

They’d been put on a time limit, Rodolfo realized. One they had no control over and couldn’t communicate to inform the ones that did of it. They were fucked.

So completely fucked.

--

Yeah, yeah, send an ask for part 3. :P

[goldeneyedgirl]

Ficmas22: Day 6: Homecoming

I've just discovered that we're losing power all day tomorrow, so I'm off to make sure everything is charged and ready to go. And we're decorating the tree tonight, so this is a post-and-dash.

Tonight we have a little angsty oneshot I wrote quite a while ago and I wasn't quite happy enough with so it just sitting there.

I hope you enjoy it!

He finds them in Minnesota.

(Was he looking for them? Maybe.)

The house is a sprawling place, the forest surrounds it and they are as they ever were, unchanged.

(He cannot say the same.) 

“Jasper!”

Esme is delighted to see him, and so is Emmett. Carlisle and Rosalie are pleased but subdued. Edward is watching him cautiously. There’s nothing to hear in his mind anymore, Edward doesn’t have to worry.

(He tries to remember what she smelt like; it was a million different things at once - lemons and flowers and cotton and warm blood and…)

He lets Esme hug him, high-fives Emmett but there’s nothing there. No peace or resolution or balm, just this ache of the void that exists in him now. Maybe he thought coming back here would fix things. 

“We’ve missed you,” Rosalie says, reaching out to squeeze his hand and he nods. He feels tired; his head, his bones, his heart. Like he wants to lie down and wait for oblivion. 

“It’s good to see you.” His voice is rough, unused, and the words sound flat. Carlisle and Esme exchange a look that he catches, and then Esme is hustling them back to the house. 

(Carlisle is worried; has never seen Jasper look so brittle and haunted and young, and he is ashamed to admit he wonders how many people had to die for his estranged son’s thirst to make him look such a way.)

Back in the house, in a new living room that is close enough to all the other living rooms the Cullens have owned to be slightly disconcerting, Jasper wonders why he came back at all. 

He hadn’t left on the best terms, strung-out and frustrated. Animal-hunting and school and the human charade - it was far too much to expect. It was too much, it was not enough, and he refused to stay. 

So he left them behind, and he wandered. And he killed a lot of people. 

The Cullens have questions, and he tries to focus. That’s a lot harder these days. 

Where has he been?

(Around.)

Why is he back?

(Where else can he go?)

How is he?

(Still alive. Still walking around with his throat on fire with the weight of every horrific thing he’s ever done weighing him down.)

For a minute, he imagines what it would be life if she were here, too. Human or vampire, it wouldn’t have matter. They would have loved her. It was impossible 

“What is her name?”

He looks over to Edward, sitting at the piano. Edward smiles at him, obviously misunderstanding or not hearing all the intricacies that go with the face in his mind. That she’s more than a collection of images, of memories. That she could come to the Cullens and meet them, could sit in this living room and ask them so many questions and tell them about her life with Jasper and it could have been that easy.

“Alice.”

Hearing her name hurts, the way glass sliding into human flesh does. 

“We’d love to meet her,” Esme says, beaming at him.

“I would have liked that too,” he manages hoarsely and he puts his face in his hands because it’s another day, she’s still dead, and she’s never coming here. She’s never going to be mothered by Esme, and doted on by Carlisle. She’s never going to raid Rosalie’s closet, or be pranked by Emmett, or ask Edward to play music they can dance to. 

“Jasper? What happened?” Carlisle’s voice is kind, gentle, and the older man already knows. Not the details, but the result. 

Sometimes he wishes he’d never left them. That he’d stayed and never met her, but that idea causes a rise of panic. It is what it is, it can’t be changed.

He takes a shuddering breath and begins to talk. 

The words are slow coming and rough. Ugly. Alice was human and now Alice is dead. A mugging gone wrong, and there was so much blood and it was everywhere and when he closed his hands over the wound in a panic, he heard the crunch of her ribcage and realised he’d made a bad thing so much worse. 

And she was so frightened and couldn’t catch her breath and then she was gone, bled out in a dirty alley - no long lingering good-bye, or breathless words of love. The life in her eyes dimmed, her heart went still, and her blood congealed. And she was gone, never coming back. She will not be rising again on the third day, unbreakable and pristine. 

She’s rotting in the ground underneath a stone that says ‘Mary-Alice Brandon’ and all the years she lived. 

She was going to be a dancer. 

She liked brightly coloured drinks and oranges and singing along to the radio when she did the dishes.

She always wore a necklace with a tiny ‘A’ on it, because she hated being called ‘Mary’. 

She put together all his broke bits, all the pieces of him that had been worn away, and stitched him into something that he could live with. Wrapped him up in the warmth of her affection, her hope, and her passion. She’d make him dance with her, spinning and dipping her, and they’d laugh and he’d kiss her gently - it couldn’t go too far, but he loved her so completely. 

(He’s never denied that he’s a monster, a parasite, a blight on humanity, and nothing confirmed that more than when he lapped her blood off his hands. It doesn’t matter that he looked back down at the hole in her chest, at the blood on his pants-shirt-face and the pool on the ground and promptly vomited up venom that was barely pink and he can still taste her on his tongue and it is a hell he has lived with every day since. That she died in his arms and his instinct was to feed on her.) 

Esme pulls him into the tightest hug, and he can feel her grief for him, her regret and sadness and misery that he has lost the one thing he has ever wanted. Her emotions feel very distant, muted, to him these days. It’s not a bad thing.

(He can’t feed on human blood now. It’s impossible, because all he can see is her. All he can taste is her. There’s no appeal now; it just sickens him. So Carlisle will be happy, at least, that he has to feed on animals now. He has no other choice.) 

“You have to tell us all about her, okay?” Esme says, looking devastated. “I bet she was beautiful, Jasper.”

God, she was. 

He took two things from her that night. Her phone and her little ‘A’ necklace. Her phone had all her photos on it, hundreds and hundreds of them with her bright smile and her big eyes. Videos of her dancing, talking, singing. She’s so alive in those videos that it feels impossible she’s gone. 

(There’s even a few pictures of them together, that she took and promised to never show anyone. She used one for her background screen, hugging him tightly around his neck, and he’s staring at her with a smile on his face and a look on his face that he’s found the only thing that will ever matter to him. It’s hard to look at now, knowing that he ended up hastening her death. Maybe she could have been saved, maybe she just needed medical attention. Maybe, maybe, maybe.)

He lets Esme fuss, he can feel her distress. Everyone else is just looking at him, waiting for something. Anything. And there isn’t that anymore. He’s just a void, a blackhole of grief and solitude and that bone-deep exhaustion. 

“You’re home now,” Emmett says. He looks heartbroken, like he’s mourning a sister he never met. Rosalie hasn’t said much, probably has a lot of questions about how and why, but she’s always been good to him. She won’t ask until he’s ready to answer. 

“Home,” he agrees, and it is the closest he’s ever going to get now. Because home was lying next to her on her bed, her head on the edge of her pillow, snuggled as close as she could get to him, whilst he read. Home was holding her on the couch, whilst they watched a movie after she got home at night, as she traced his hands absently. Home was every smile, every giggle, every ounce of hope and love that she emitted in his direction, and it’s all gone now. He’s never getting it back. 

So he’ll stay here. With people he cares about, who will understand that what’s been broken can never be put back together. That they are unchanged, the same people who welcomed him in once, and who have welcomed him back again. 

But he has changed, and there’s no going back. 

[fangsup-cobrastyle]

Songs on my burnout playlist and why I added them

for reference I've struggled for like a year with knowing I have to leave this place cause I love my coworkers and the animals I work with and care about them probably too much

Pierce the Veil - "Emergency Contact" "There's no greater vengeance than learning to enjoy again / Hope you get the message, nobody's shatter-resistant" "Leave me something / Or let me out, I'm starving" "Waiting for the start of / Things that I want, this happily-ever-after / You choke on your words, but you swallow them faster"

My Chemical Romance - "This Is the Best Day Ever" Literally every line of the entire song but especially... "They stared us down when we met in the emergency room" "Every hour / On the hour / They drew blood" "Well, I felt I couldn't take / Another day inside this place / From silent dreams we never wake" "Well, I thought I heard you say 'I like you / We can get out / We don't have to stay / Stay inside this place'" "You left my heart an open wound / And I love you for..."

Fall Out Boy - "Heartbreak Feels So Good" "Is there a word for bad miracle?" "Nobody said the road was endless / Nobody said the climb was friendless / But could we please pretend this won't end?" "We could cry a little, cry a lot... We'll cry later or cry now, but baby / Heartbreak feels so good"

Fall Out Boy - "Fake Out" "Remember us just like this forever / But this can't last, won't last / So make no plans, and none can be broken" "Do you laugh about me whenever I leave? / Or do I just need more therapy?" "Love is in the air / I just gotta figure out a window to break out / Buried alive inside my dreams / But it was all a fake out" "My mood board is just pictures of you / But I'm not sad anymore" "We all started off as shiny dimes / But we all got flipped too many times / We did it for futures that never came / And for pasts that we're never gonna change"

Fall Out Boy - "So Much (For) Stardust" "I feel like something that's been stretched out over and over again / Until I'm creased, and I'm about to break down the middle" "The stars are the same as ever / But I don't have the guts to keep it together / Stuck in the permafrost" "Ache it till you make it" "I think I've been going through it / I've been putting your name to it" "In another life / You were the sunshine of my lifetime / What would you trade the pain for? / I'm not sure" "I used to be a real go-getter / I used to think it'd all get better"

Cavetown - "This Is Home" "Are you tired of me yet? / I'm a little sick right now, but I swear / When I'm ready, I will fly us out of here" "I'll figure out a way to get us out of here" "Turn off your porcelain face / I can't really think right now in this place" "Are you dead? / Sometimes I think I'm dead" "Time is / Slowly / Tracing his face / But strangely, he feels at home in this place"

ILLENIUM & Jon Bellion - "Good Things Fall Apart" "Is it you? Is it me? / Did you find somebody better / Someone who isn't me / 'Cause I know that I was never your type" "Tell me what you hate about me / Whatever it is, I'm sorry / I know I can be dramatic / But everybody said we had it" "Coming to terms with a broken heart / I guess that sometimes, good things fall apart"

My Chemical Romance - "Fake Your Death" "But even lights can fade away" "'Cause even heroes get the blues / Or any misery you choose / You like to watch, we like to use / And we were born to lose" "I choose defeat, I walk away / And leave this place the same today" "Just look at all that pain" "You want the heart or to be saved / But even good guys still get paid" "So fake your death, erase your blame / And leave the lights on when you stay" "Come on and feel that shame"

[quietwingsinthesky]

How would Gabriel feel about the whole Samifer pregnancy situation? I really love the way you write him, and I feel like Lucifer needs at least one sibling to be outwardly supportive of him in a healthy way. Wait, on that note, does Gabriel tell Michael to cool off and try and get him to rationalize his behaviour? (Good luck with that)

Assuming Samifer pregnancy coincides with Lucifer taking a chill pill on the whole 'ending the world' thing, I think Gabriel's feelings on the whole thing would be... complicated.

On the one hand, this is what he wants, an end to the fighting! bit of an unorthodox way to go about it, but as long as Lucifer's no longer on-board with trying to kill Michael, that's overall a win for Gabriel.

On the other hand (and I think specifically these feelings extend to any scenario in which Lucifer or Michael stops for reasons other than 'because Gabriel wants them to and has wanted them to for centuries',) Lucifer's doing this because he's building his own new little family. He's got Sam, he's got a baby coming, and just because Gabriel's there with them, doesn't mean he's with them, you know? He's used to being able to cut and run, but that also translates into feeling disposable? if that makes sense. He ditched Heaven and they just moved on like losing him didn't even matter. (From Gabriel POV. I think we all know that losing him so soon or even before losing Lucifer forever, depending on when you set Gabriel leaving, actually severely fucked up Michael & Raphael and contributed to Heaven becoming as bad as it did.)

So, he's obviously happy there's not going to be an Apocalypse throwdown, at least on Lucifer's end, but at the same time, resentful, because why is Lucifer making an exception now, why didn't he back down for Gabriel. (I do at least think Gabriel's got the sense in him to not like. resent the baby itself for this. it's mostly him being passive aggressive towards lucifer about it.)

He's going to come around to it in the end. If you're like me and just ignore the later seasons retcon that Gabriel isn't actually Loki, he's the only angel with any experience being pregnant. He knows how to help Lucifer, and what better way to bond than over dealing with pregnancy nonsense? Lucifer is soo grumpy and out of sorts when stuff just starts aching randomly, and Gabriel is annoying & helpful in equal measure.

And at whatever point Michael figures out what's going on and shows up, very perturbed by Lucifer being A) free of their destiny and choosing not to even show up to the big fight and B) PREGNANT????, seeing Gabriel ALSO ALIVE AND THERE SOMEHOW???? is probably going to be enough to send him into shock asjkldjaksdj. Gabriel just gently escorts him outside, sits him down, and goes, "We're uncles now :) We have a chance to be happy and not explode each other and this nice world we've got :) You mess this up and I will stab you myself :D"

(Internally, Gabriel is freaking the fuck out, but hey, he's convincing to Michael, at least.)

[drrealityslenderverse]

Confessions

A03 Request: Chris and Alex comfort each other and end up confess their feelings. It can be a mix of angst and comfort.

We're starting this out with some angst but it'll end in some nice comfort!

Back to main Contents || Back to One-shot Contents

“You know what? I’m done!” Alex shouted, stalking off for the car. 

Chris flinched but was quick to run after him. “Alex, wait!” 

His feet skidded in the snow as Alex came to a sudden halt in front of him. The look of anger burned into Chris as he fell. 

“She’s dead because of us. Dead, Chris!” Alex snapped and gestured at the grave marker they’d just finished making—the thing was already threatening to fall over. 

Chris couldn’t meet his eyes. Heather was dead because she’d gotten hurt helping them. Without knowing who to trust, a hospital hadn’t been an option. Prior to Matt’s betrayal, he’d found her some help but after once again being on their own… The bullet wound’s infection had become too much. 

“We’ve lost too many friends, Chris.” Alex continued before striking home. “Our families would still be alive if it weren’t for you insisting we keep going.” 

“You don’t… mean it.” He felt like he’d gotten punched and then stabbed again.��

Alex just turned and headed back for his car again, leaving Chris where he sat. Chris stared, panic settling in him. All the stress and pain had made Alex lash out like this before. He’d come back… right? If there was one thing they each had always been able to count on it was each other. 

“Alex please wait…” He called out, watching the man pause. Hope fluttered in his chest. “I can’t lose you too. Don’t go. I… I love you.” 

Silence.

Dread churned his gut. The confession was out and it was met with nothing. Chris teared up as he watched Alex climb into his car and drive off. Well… there was his answer. “Stupid… Why did I think that was a good time to admit it?”

Chris drove back to the hotel they’d managed to scrounge up money for in silence. His chest ached, though for once it wasn’t from the stress of their situation nor the argument. Why did he say that? It was true but… Why say it then? Why couldn’t he have waited for a better time? Or said it so much earlier when things weren’t so… horrible.

Hands ran through his hair as he sat on the edge of the bed, eyes continuing to shoot glances at the digital alarm clock on the bedside table. “Alex always came back before…”

It was so late. Hours and not even a message on his phone. Anxiety ate at him. Chris couldn’t help but wonder if the Order had gotten him. What if he was lying trapped or dead somewhere waiting for him to stumble upon much like the two had done after going home and finding their families? A quick call rang until it went to voicemail and he let his phone drop onto the comforter as he ran his hands down his face. 

“He’s okay… he has to be okay.” Was he wasting time lying here when Alex was out there dying? 

Tears built up from months and years of stress, spilling over his cheeks as he rolled onto his side and curled into a ball. He was alone. His family, Greg, Jesse, Matt, Heather, and now maybe Alex were dead. What was he going to do with himself?

Time continued to pass. Against all odds, Chris finally managed to fall into a fitful slumber for a while. Nightmares plagued him but he wouldn’t wake until a hand firmly shook his shoulder. Chris’ eyes blinked open, registering his surroundings before jerking instinctively away from the hand with an embarrassing yelp.

“Chris, relax, it’s just me.” Alex sat on the edge of the bed, body blocking the view of the time, though Chris could only guess it was some godforsaken hour of the morning. 

“Fuck, don’t do that.”

“Sorry.” Eyes met his before quickly darting away. Alex cleared his throat, looking awkward. “And for earlier. You know I wouldn’t just leave you.” 

There was a weight behind those words of something not said but Chris didn’t push. He was ecstatic to see Alex was alive and well but exhaustion kept it from showing. 

“Are you alright?” The bed creaked as Alex shifted next to him. While the man didn’t ask it aloud, it was obvious Chris had been crying. 

“I’m just about as fucking peachy as I can be considering everything.” He winced, not meaning to make it sound like he wanted to argue further. 

Arms wrapped around him, tugging him further against Alex. “I didn’t mean it, earlier. I’ll keep following you through this insanity as long as you want.” 

Warmth flooded his cheeks; he could feel Alex’s steady breathing on his back and his chin resting on the top of his head. Was this real? Yes. Alex’s arms grounded him to the present despite the pain from the most recent deaths wracking his brain. This wasn’t something Chris would just imagine. 

“Did… you mean what you said earlier?” 

The question hung in the air between them. Chris swallowed nervously and tilted his head to at least face the man as he confessed for a second time. “Yeah. I love you…” 

For a moment he braced himself for an official rejection despite how they were currently cuddled up to each other. Alex’s smile was a rare sight these days but is spread across his face just as handsomely as Chris remembered. 

“Took you long enough to say something.” He chuckled, running a hand through Chris’ lighter hair. “You’re really obvious to the point I thought I was reading everything wrong… but I’m glad I didn’t. I love you too.”  

Okay, maybe he’d died at some point. Perhaps this was a dream. No way was this happening. Chris let himself sink further into the other man’s embrace. “Well, real or not, it’s better than what I normally dream about.”

“Alex… Don’t die, okay? I… I don’t want to see that.” Panic shot through him momentarily. Surely at any second this perfect moment they were sharing would be ruined. 

“Shh…” Surprisingly gentle touches as Alex rubbed a hand soothingly on his back, occasionally drifting to his arms to make nonsensical trails that caused goosebumps to rise on his skin. “We’re safe. We’ll be fine as long as we have each other, got it?” 

Chris hummed, muscles relaxing under the touch. His eyes drifted closed as he put down his guard; Alex’s presence made him feel safe and knowing his feelings were returned certainly took off a smidge of stress. 

“So… I guess we’re boyfriends now.” One last half-lidded look as the thought sent a spark of joy through him. One light amongst the dark reality of the Order hunting them. 

Chris would drift off in his boyfriend’s arms, Alex falling asleep soon after with arms still circling him and a smile still on his face.