#watbatjokes

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Batman: Damn... I would have brought a coat if I knew it was gonna be THIS cold...

Joker, handing him his coat: You can use mine! I barely notice the cold.

Watevra, handing him HER coat: Nononono, no way can he wear that white tailcoated sparkly monstrosity, everyone knows this vigilante wears BLACK.

Joker: Oh like your shapeless car coat is any better! Be might as well be wearing a black potato sack if he wore that thing!!

Watevra: Oh you did NOT just call my La Renta a "potato sack!!"

Joker and Watevra: *continue bickering*

Batman: ...

Batman: *puts on both coats*

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker: *skipping into the house with a snake-clown* hey guys! I bought this cute baby boi! What do I name him?

Batman: *jumps so high he hits the cieling and then crashes to the ground* Y-YOU WHA-T???

Watev'ra: *without even skipping a beat* William snakespeare.

Joker: :o

William: *hissyhissy*

Joker: :D

Everybody meet our pet.. William snakespeare. Much to the distress of bats

[askwatbatjokes]

x

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker: BATS!

Bats: shh! *points at a sleeping queen*

Joker, whispering: oh..sorryyy

Bats, whispering: what's up babe?

Joker, whispering: I set the kitchen on fire

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Everyone's to-do list

Joker: be gay. Do crime.

Batman: be gay. Fight crime.

Watev'ra: what's crime? Do gays.

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Parallels

Our "innocent" Lego babies

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker talking about his son to harley and ivy

Joker: the kid weeeiiirrrddd! He was laughing at a cup..

Harley: a cup?

Joker: for an hour.

Ivy: sounds like something y--

Joker: *laughs hard* f-funny cuppp

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Batman: how long is your ideal hug?

Watev'ra: mm...fifteen seconds maybe?

Joker: an hour.

Batman:

Watev'ra:

Batamn: wow... You're uhh.... Really that touch starved huh?

Joker: why else would I buy a sNAKE-CLOWN??

Watev'ra:...they hug.

Joker: *wraps himself up with William* they HuG

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Before they officially hooked up with joker as a couple I imagine it was a bit like this

Bruce: *looking at joker stuff in his Batcave*

Bruce:

Bruce:he's kinda cute...

Watev'ra: he's a MURDERER!

Bruce: *let's her see some closer pics*

Watev'ra:

Watev'ra: but it's kinda cute..

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker: *tryna impress watev'ra* *comes over to her while she's busy* *rolls onto the table* *gets in a pose* guess what.

Watev'ra:... *amused* *stops her work* *puts her arms over top of him and slightly holds him down* what~?

Joker: *oh no flustered*

Joker:*what was I even gonna say*

Joker: *why must her and batsy do this to me when I'm not expecting it*

Joker: Z's

Watev'ra:

Watev'ra:??

Joker: are just sideways N's

Watev'ra:...whooooaaaaa *let's go of him and stares at a piece of paper* WHOAAAA

Batman from the other room: Jay baby, stop confusing her! Watevs, you have to work

Watev'ra: Zo!

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Almost getting caught Pt. 2

*watev'ra comes out of her bedroom* *she's in a nightgown* *it's late at night* *joker wanted cereal and she's going out to get it*

Wyldstyle: *playing video games with sweet mayhem and benny*.....watev'ra..?

Watev'ra: *mutters* ah brick.. Yeah? *turns around*

Benny: are you covered in...lipstick..?

Watev'ra: no..?

Wyldstyle:...whats the red lip marks and bite marks all over your body from..?

Watev'ra: bats....likes...to.....wear.........lipstick.. Sometimes..

Wyldstyle:

Benny:

Mayhem:

Watevra: hehe..?

Wyldstyle, turns back to the game: I always knew he wasn't that straight

Watev'ra: haha yea! *grabs the cereal*

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Gettin caught

*vacation with all the legos* *but joker was smuggled in a suitcase so Emmet and wyldstyle wouldn't see him* *they are all worried about what they'll say about them being with a criminal*

Emmet: *knocks on the room their sleeping in* *batman opens the door*

Batman: *lipstick smeared all over him* *in a robe* no, Alfred, they haven't figured it ou--youaren'tmyAlfred.

Joker: *not wearing a shirt* *also has lipstick all over him but it's black* well who is it? Richie? *comes up*...........

Emmet: *gasps* *looks worried* a-are you cheating on a queen???

Batman: nononosshhhhh! He isn't here... Don't tell anybody.

Emmet:...wyldstyle!!

Batman: youlittle--

Wyldstyle: *comes*....*takes a picture* I'm sending this to her* *sends it* *the closet gets a notification*

Joker:

Batman:

Emmet:

Wyldstyle: *opens the door* *watev'ra in a towel, black and red lipstick all over her*.......hi

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Bats is home

Joker: welcome home bats! Leave any common sense and sanity at the entrance!

Batman: nope I need those.

Watev'ra: *sneaking up behind him for the first night of a routinely tackle and tickle* not anymoooore~~~

Joker: *giggles and starts closing him in from the front*

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker: Figuring out outside life one step at a time.

Joker: hey! I found another lie that the arkham guards would talk about to eachother! One of them talked about how all these berries make them sick but I guess they were just trying to scare the inmates!!! These taste awesome! *shoves a handful of poisonous berries into his mouth* I'm not sick at all! These taste better than any other berry!!

Alfred: *mopping floors ten minutes later* *finds joker in a blanket on a couch* *William worried next to him* *has a trashcan next to him* oh good lord what happened now?

Joker: *looks up at him* *eyes are bloodshot* *face is even paler than usual* I... Have made... A... Grave mistake.

Then Alfred lectured Bruce and watev'ra never ever to leave him alone as joker was sick for the next two weeks. Watevs and bats felt

Horrible

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Watev'ra: are you mad..?

Joker: no.

Batman: oh, so angrily sharpening knives at 4 in the morning is a new hobby for you?

Joker: yes.

[thealmightyenergydorito]

Joker when he's home alone

Joker: if I'm lucky enough, my internal organs will stay in the darkness for the day.

Joker:

Joker:

Joker: *grabs a lighter and a glowstick*

Joker: it's just my luck I'm a chaotic idiot~