totally-correct-lego-movie

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: Why is our entire house baby proofed?? I had to click a piece of plastic to open the cupboard and couldn't charge my phone... ... Lucy? Is there something--

Lucy: Hey! Don't look at me, I don't know either!!

Rex: ... Emmet--??

Emmet: I just learned that 100% of household accidents happen at home!! I'm just taking precautions okay??

Rex:

Lucy:

Emmet: You're welcome.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Unikitty: LUCY!!! YOU AND EMMET CAN'T GET A DIVORCE!!! 😭

Lucy: ... We aren't married.

Unikitty: No... I'm too late...!!

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

(at the end of the 2nd movie be like)

Rex @ Emmet: Now what is your choice, Emmet? You can either DIE! DIE or-!

Lucy: NO! DON'T DO EITHER OF THOSE!!

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: I am the BIG SPOON! The BIG spoon!!! Got that??

Lucy: Why, because you got a thing for control and don’t want to feel vulnerable, or something?

Rex: Okay first, fuck you, and second no, it’s because I’m always the bigger and stronger one, so it just makes sense!!

Emmet, leaning in to whisper: He just likes how it feels to hold someone.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Syspocalypstar Citizen: My life is in the hands of an idiot!

Emmet: Nononono!

Emmet: *gestures to himself and Rex* TWO idiots!

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Batman: Damn... I would have brought a coat if I knew it was gonna be THIS cold...

Joker, handing him his coat: You can use mine! I barely notice the cold.

Watevra, handing him HER coat: Nononono, no way can he wear that white tailcoated sparkly monstrosity, everyone knows this vigilante wears BLACK.

Joker: Oh like your shapeless car coat is any better! Be might as well be wearing a black potato sack if he wore that thing!!

Watevra: Oh you did NOT just call my La Renta a "potato sack!!"

Joker and Watevra: *continue bickering*

Batman: ...

Batman: *puts on both coats*

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Unikitty, on the phone with Rex: Turn around.

Unikitty: The other way.

Unikitty: No, the other other way.

Unikitty: One more time.

Rex: WHERE ARE YOU?!

Unikitty: Oh I'm not there yet, but the thought of you turning around in circles like that is really funny!

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: I'm straight up depressed. Emmet's been doing his best to cheer me up.

Rex: He gave me this sticker this morning just for waking up.

*shows the 'good job' sticker*

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: You're gonna ace this.

Lucy: You think that because you love me, and love has made you dumb.

Rex: I disagree. If anything, love has made me smarter.

Rex: Remember last week when I boiled that egg?

Lucy: That was big. I was really proud of you.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Emmet: Trying to participate in society has left me a sad and lonely man...

Emmet: Oh-- Who are you??

Rex: I'm the sad and lonely man that trying to participate in society has left you.

Emmet: ... I don't get it

Rex: It's a joke, you sad little man.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Emmet: Sword girlfriend. Like a regular girlfriend, but with a sword.

Rex: I see your point, but sword girlfriend's got nothing on KNIFE WIFE!

Wyldstyle: I-

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: be crime do gay

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: love is dead and never existed. All you did was betray me as I lay sick and festering. You are the definition of dread.

Emmet: Rexy are you okay?!

Rex: Lucy stole my fuckin' garlic bread! >:(

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Rex: If I die, please bury me in one of two poses:

1. t-pose

2. you know I had to do it to em

Good Cop: "If" I die?

Bad Cop: Great, first burial i've been invited to and they might not even die.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Emmet: What's the word for when hands are bisexual?

Wyldstyle: You mean ambidextrous?

Emmet: Yeah, that.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

Benny: That right there is the mail. Now let's talk about the mail. Can we talk about the mail, please, Emmet? I've been dying to talk about the mail with you all day, OK?

"Rex Dangervest," this name keeps coming up over and over again. Every day Rex's mail is getting sent back to me. Rex Dangervest! Rex Dangervest! I look in the mail, and this whole box is Rex Dangervest!!

So I say to myself, "I gotta find this guy! I gotta go up to his office and put his mail in the guy's hands! Otherwise, he's never going to get it and he's going to keep coming back down here."

So I go up to Rex's office and what do I find out, Emmet? What do I find out?!

There is no Rex Dangervest.

The man does not exist, okay?

So I decide, "Oh crap, buddy, I gotta dig a little deeper." There's no Rex Dangervest? You gotta be kidding me! I got boxes full of Rex!!

All right. So I start marchin' my way down to Penny in HR and I knock on her door and I say, "Penny!! Penny! I gotta talk to you about Rex." And when I open the door what do I find?

There's not a single gosh darn desk in that office!

There is... no... Penny in HR.

Emmet, half the employees in this building have been made up. This office is a ghost town.

[totally-correct-lego-movie]

We know what we're doing, we're trained professionals.

Mods, rules, and FAQ under the cut!

---

This blog is run by four mods, Mod Ems (@brickowskibois), Mod Lilac (@lilacs-stash), Mod Max (@maxphilippa), and Mod Burgy (@burgycreeper405-blog)!

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