#vfdlibrarian

[thevoipolloi]

Signs indicating you are literally Count Olaf:

Your solution to almost every problem is a bottle of red wine.

You have a deep, uncompromising love of fire, both as a metaphor and as a weapon.

You are quite temperamental, especially when there's no roast beef available.

You are a grudge-holding champion, particularly if the enemy in question has harmed someone you love.

You have a distinct tendency to overreact, and think in black and white terms.

You find it impossible to act in a way that could not possibly be described as "theatrical".

You have a long history of dysfunctional, codependent romantic relationships.

You are willing to do anything to exact revenge upon your enemies including harm their children and scheme to steal their fortunes after you've murdered them.

You are a dark soul who would rather wallow in resentment and half-ass life than get some fucking therapy.

[ess-aluminaen]

I paint this after finishing ASOUE, sharing after months. This series was the best and the most interesting TV series I've ever watched. I hope producers will make some special episode or something like that. I need it.

Please someone recommend me a show like this because:

"The World is Quiet Here."

[viletbaudelaire]

sneak peak of the intro song sequence for season 3!

(via netflixasoue on Insta)

[alfunccot]

cont. from x | @vfdlibrarian // Dewey

He’s heard of Hotel Denouement and its unusual organization, of course, and he knows that a regular disguise won’t be enough – however, Olaf never bothered to learn anything about the system itself except for a few facts that V.F.D. had taught him. That’s why he appears in the lobby wearing a ridiculous fedora, a pair of enormous sunglasses that cover a half of his face and a meticulously tied purple cravat with tiny images of skulls scattered all over it. 

“Mon nom is Jean Valjean,” he says with a fake French accent and a fake smile, using the name of a character from one of his favorite musicals as an alias. Wicked people often have a particular disregard for grammar – a phrase, which here means “they are likely to deliberately make mistakes while speaking a language they know very well”, and, having a villainous disregard for grammar, the Count continues in the same manner. “I be an ichthyologist, please, it is word, which here means ‘someone who studies birds.’ 

His eyes, concealed by sunglasses, are shining brightly, as he examines the man before him. Ernest would have probably recongized him a few minutes ago, so that must be Frank. Or Ernest could be pretending to not recognize him, so that could be Ernest. He has an important mission in the hotel, and being disclosed isn’t a part of plan A. “Where you put your foreign guests, please? Room 792?” 

[kitsunegirl7]

[sincerely-ernest]

🙋‍♀️ + does Ernest steal things from his hotel guests, or only his brothers? Discuss

Information, and occasionally a piece of evidence. But if someone has brought something to cause damage to the hotel or his brothers, it will be apprehended, no matter the side. 

[bravebibliophile]

@vfdlibrarian liked this for a starter

“This is, amazing” she admitted as she examined her surroundings. She had never seen a library as large as this one, and if anything it made her never want to leave. “So you’re saying that you’re going to be in charge of running this whole thing?”

[beatricebaticeer-blog]

      the hotel is a safe place, of that she knows. what she doesn’t like, is being left behind while bertrand and others scamper off to a mission that she’s unable to lend a hand in because she’s far too pregnant. the dangers, bertrand had said. she’d wanted to toss him from the roof quite frankly, but had refrained for the effort of climbing the steps. 

    instead, she’s decided to keep dewey company so she doesn’t go stark raving mad and give ernest reason to complain. 

         “i’ve brought a gift. or a bribe, rather so i can hide away with you all day. i remember you mentioned something about a fondness for a particular type of tea from india, so i grabbed some on my last excursion there. sorry i haven’t been able to bring it by sooner.”

@vfdlibrarian

[storiiestcld]

@vfdlibrarian

the note left to her is confusing at best, but she doesn’t investigate it until jacques is asleep and she is certain her leaving won’t awake him. throwing on her robe over her pajamas, she clutches the strange note in her hand and slips out into the hotel hall. it’s late, so the halls are empty. for that she’s grateful. she steps into the lift and glances at the note.

    floor 135.

except there is no such thing, she knows. the hotel is large, but not nearly so. brows furrowed, her glasses slip a little down her nose as she glances at the button panel. it’s worth a shot, surely. if anything the lift will stay still and not go anywhere. so she pressed the 1, 3, and 5 buttons at the exact same time and is surprised when the lift lurches to life and begins to descend. 

       i hope this isn’t a mistake.

[snicketsquadron]

Happy birthday to the Snicket twins!

Thank you Dewey! I was hoping we could celebrate together. I even baked a cake (I ensured Kit was nowhere near the kitchen for the duration of baking). But now I can’t seem to find her anywhere…

-JS

I’m working in a surprise for Jacques, it will be ready tonight. But how about a Belated Birthday Brunch tomorrow, to make up for disappearing today? With love, 

-K

[violentfatefuldays-blog]

@vfdlibrarian

Penelope Piet was a resourceful girl, a phrase which here means she had a common place book full of useful code words and many secret locations. One of those locations happened to be a library hidden just below the surface of a very misleading pond outside of the last safe place. She passed quickly through the lobby of the Hotel Denouement, hiding her face under the brim of her hat. She blended in with a set of triplets and their parents who would soon suffer a tragic fire. Perhaps if she had known their importance she would have stopped and logged the experiences of the Quagmire parents in her account of the schism. Instead, she entered the elevator, smashing her finger first against  the close door key, and then, simultaneously, the numbers 1,3, and 5. 

All of Penelope’s work had led her here, to the place she assumed would finally answer her questions and the man she admired who cared for the collection of vast foul deeds. She stepped off the elevator and let out a deep breath she had not known she was holding. “Hello,” she began before the man had a chance to speak. “My name is Penelope Piet and my late parents always told me that it is important to bring a book in case you need something to do to pass the time or conceal yourself from vengeful associates. I am in the process of compiling the Incomplete History of the Schism that has destroyed a once great organization. I have come to this library on the understanding that it is the last island in a vast sea of ignorance.” 

[thatsecondsalemboy-a]

Also to all the Series of Unfortunate Events rpers that I’ve been following lately, I will at some point be making an ASOUE verse for Credence, but also I’m in the process of setting up a sideblog for Fiona (currently strictly Netflix series based until I get a chance to read the books) so you can find her over on @queequegcaptain 

[woolfcried]

vfdlibrarian replied to your post “HEADCANON. yes, frank is “noble” and “good” or whatever but it’s less...”

Frank is a good man

everyone: a brave volunteer died

frank, loudly: you mean my BROTHER died, you assholes

[viletbaudelaire]

the baudelaires: this man is count olaf!

mr. poe: that's so sad alexa play despacito

[theyoungersebald]

vfdlibrarian replied to your post: //y’all don’t want to even know how much I cried...

Yeah I know this is a series where everyone dies but the ending was still rough…

//Well not everyone died, a lot of them did though. I did like how it was like the ending of Down.ton Abb.ey. We just kinda looked away, so to speak, and let Beatrice and Lemony have their lives to themselves.

[rosewrists]

📂📂📂 for Kit! (did I send one of these already?)

useless headcanon meme !! || always accepting !!!

one — kit is the queen of resting bitch face. generally, and especially when she’s concentrating very hard, she looks very intimidating. but those who are brave enough to attempt a conversation will find out that she’s quite a funny person. she’s very self-aware of her air of ‘ do-not-approach ’ and has quite a sarcastic and witty humour to her that makes her very charming.

two — dewey is so unbelievably important to kit in so many ways — I could go on for ages about this but I’ll condense it as much as possible. after the garbage fire that was her last relationship, kit’s confidence about her dating life had been Veritably Fucking Destroyed, and she didn’t think she’d ever end up in another relationship ever again. but dewey was just so different and kind and he brought back a part of herself that she thought was long dead, the part of herself that could fall in love, that could commit to a loving relationship, that could consider the possibility of settling down. if they hadn’t both died, I’m certain that kit and dewey would’ve gotten married, or at least spent the rest of their lives together. he makes her feel more like herself than any other person she’s ever known.

three — beatrice was an accident. a happy accident, but an accident nonetheless. for the longest time kit didn’t want children, believing they’d get in the way of the work she could do with VFD. she faced the concept of her pregnancy with trepidation, but support from dewey and her ability to continue her work led to her growing to accept becoming a new mother, and eventually looking forward to it greatly. also, kit and dewey never managed to decide on a colour for the baby’s room before they both died. :):):)