#very important content that i need in my blog thank you goodbye
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chamaleonsoul · 1 year ago
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fully taking credit for this btw
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5sos and waterparks in the same venue today god i am only asking for one thing
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mudkirby · 10 months ago
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Pebbles In order of appearance.
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@druidshollow lore lore lore Dune lore lore
@flickering-nightfall whole reason I draw Pebbles the way I do since first exposure
@toxictoxicities b u f f
@dennis7231 still waiting on them dropwigs >:)
@weepinglilvessel ant snooooot
@mudkirby me :> 🔫
@shkika love your Suns
@northflowerowo Sorry I shoved him so far down lol
Honourable mentions/ shout outs: @trashiiplant Howwow Knight and Wainwowld :D
@kelnexia is lurking.
@daszombes Thank you for explaining lore, giving us peak story telling and characters to simp for in the form of the Iterator Logs. What? No Pebbles? Don't care. You're on here now.
Druid's Hollow, the first time I ever saw your YouTube channel was with the Distant Frontier video after just having gotten into Iterator Logs. One of the most pivotal pieces of media you've made in my life was God- Jake Daniels. That single video alone gave me the push I needed to make my first Rainworld oc Parting Clouds. The stories surrounding your characters (and Dune) are creative beyond my ability to write stories. Keep up your top tier memery.
Flickering Nightfall, I'ma put this in a nutshell. Duckdance. After that I found your blog via Google before I made a Tumblr and became enthralled by your content. From something as obscure to me as Infinity Train to Pebbles ragdolling, you were essentially my gateway into liking Iterators. I love the purple. I need moar.
Vic, b u f f I haven't known your blog long and was introduced to you through the My Goodbye animation. Since I was sort of entirely new to Rainworld at that point, I had no idea what was happening. I just saw a well drawn thing and went "oooooo". I'm all for Suns' antenna twitches and NSH box head. Also, body pillow 💀
Dennis, one of the first blogs I found when I first started Tumblr. I found you through the @iterator-ask-blog and found bullying Pebbles hilarious. I love the way you draw the yellow things on his head and I just appreciate that you do digital in general. I do not, will not and proceeds to die if I must. I've seen quick progress with your art style as well. Keep going.
Vessel, I barely know you. Who da heck are ye? I saw your art style once and knew I needed to follow. The way you draw Pebbles and Moon are so satisfying to stare at for minutes and I had way too much fun replicating that s n o o t. I don't know what you're up to with them aside from chaos. Murky Seas' story and design are fantastic. RIP
Shkika, I only found you through the @ask-looks-to-the-moon blog and love the way you draw the Iterators. It's very stylistic without straying too far. The three fingered hands to the goofy faces Moon expresses makes me smile. B a l l s. My Suns design was more so inspired by the way you make him as you were somehow the first Suns exposure. You're the only reason I can't see him without fluff. How did you make Pebbles cute kavvkatkcfadal
Northflowo, way back in 2022 in my first exposure to Hollow Knight, I found your channel through the Baby Mantis skin video with Nosk along with the lore in a nutshell video. Any other content I saw I forgor. In any case, your channel was there in my search for knowledge on that game. Fast-forward to the near conclusion of 2023 when I was first introduced to Rainworld. In my hunt for memes and more knowledge, I found the other lore in a nutshell video and realized you were the perfect channel for me as you had plenty of other content on that subject. Your art still manages to astound me, especially with the shot you did in the map Pliocene and the Warrior Cats redraws like with the waterfall. I'm trash at drawing backgrounds and might learn something from you.
And of great importance to me, @bornt-urnge/@zigmatism
@kitterjitters /@offended-dragon
Thank you for every moment of drawing from Pokemon to Kirby to Mire (oc) and anything else. You have made some of the largest impacts on my life, drawing, game choices and I've enjoyed every moment. I want to have more ridiculous sessions like that in the future and look forward to it.
Some of you have been around in my life for some time and others I've just found. All the same, every single art piece you've made has inspired me no matter how polished, memed or "trash". All of you have made an impact on me, no matter how miniscule. I look forward to the future with anticipation for all of your art. Have a terrific year, and with my deepest gratitude, thank you. Thank you for being here. Thank you for reading this.
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tmwcs · 1 year ago
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Hiii love your work and always cant wait for the next chapter!!!! But I was just reading some of your works and then a thought came to my head. What if YN lost somebody important but she didnt want Heethan to know so she tried hiding it. Just wondering if Heethan would like find her sobbing after finding out and tried comforting her or it would end some other way? Also a quick question I think you usually describe reader as foreign so what if the funeral was in a different country would Heethan let her go by herself or would he follow?
Once again love your works and I quite literally scream every time there is a new chapter to anything!!!
Hello!! Thank you so much for the compliment! I love it when I hear ppl enjoy the content on this blog, makes me so motivated and happy. ♥️ today my parents and I are returning from a family trip so DT and MT chapters are coming in hot.
so heethan literally is attached to you like glue. Even when you’re in classes, he has a specific seat he wants you to sit in, and it’s one that’s by the window across from parking so he can see you. Or he’ll pop in your classroom and just hide in the back and watch you until your class iss over, bc he’s on his last year and no one is going to tell heethan what to do (everyone is afraid of him) so seeing you upset and noticing it is very high. If you’re sobbing about something, he’s going to catch you doing it bc he’s always with your or got some type of sight on you. He also loves you (too much) that he notices every single little thing about you, and he’ll notice with you’re acting out of character and upset. So after he finds out you’ve been crying, he’ll console you and embrace you, literally have you on his lap and just shelter you with his arms doing the whole “shhhh shh shh shhhhh�� thing he’s known to do from time to time. He’ll run his fingers through your hair and ask you what’s wrong and the moment you tell him, he’ll sympathize with you greatly and conduct every single means possible to comfort you. When you tell him about the funeral, he won’t let you go by yourself, but he will clear everything on his schedule and take you. He’ll get the plane tickets or get everything ready with the car, either way, and take you back home where he’ll bring you to the funeral himself. He’ll watch over you while giving you a moment of peace and allow you to say your goodbyes, while standing off to the side and giving you some space to mourn for the deceased. When all is said and done, as you make your way back to him when leaving the funeral home or cemetery, he’ll embrace you and take you back to the hotel or wherever you guys are staying and will continue to give you some space to mourn while attending to your every need.
He’s very compassionate and understanding when he’s not so enraged, bc he loves you so much that he would do anything for your happiness and comfort. Even when he is mad, he does things that aren’t correct, but he does it out of love for you. So when seeing you upset, he’d dedicate himself to you and would find a way to always hold you, but wouldn’t let his sexual nature get the better of him, despite the fact ghat when seeing you cry, he wants to “love” you bc he knows he can make you feel good and take your mind off of the matter, but in this case, he’d control himself as best he can but I kind of foresee him losing the fight the more hr sees you cry, so he’d initiate it but wouldn’t at all be rough or nasty with it like he usually is. It would be a straight up, romantic, beautiful, gentle, caring, sweet sweet lovemaking event that starts with soft gentle kisses and a slow introduction so you can get in the feeling of it. He’d display teh very soft and compassionate side of his sexual nature like his Ethan side did when he got to see you for the first time after the whole Scott and tiff thing had happened.
so yeah, as much as heethan can be a brute, he really does care and love you and that’s….kinda why he is the way that he is. Sometimes I get messages where ppl express like…a strong dislike for heethan or just will straight up be so mad that they want him gone or something bad to happen to him, or even want someone else to come and take you away from him, and I can understand how they feel but I hope that they all see that heethan does things out of an insane sensation of love and obsession that he has for you. He’ll never truly harm you to the point where you will have seriously bodily injuries, but you might be emotionally (and…mentally) tormented by his punishments from time to time bc he isn’t always right (he’s admit that a lot) but he can’t control it bc he’s so yandere for you that’s literally like a disease. He shelters and keeps you fro himself to keep you safe and his way of thinking is, if he teaches you lessons and keeps you sheltered, you’ll learn to follow his rules which are in place to help keep you safe and happy. So…lol yeah. Very conflicting and unhealthy but, idk bout you all but i love and dig it.
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merminns · 3 years ago
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No regrets
Erwin Smith x Reader
❧ Request: Hii may i request...Erwin angst...when (S3 spoiler) Erwin march toward the 🐒 with the other soldier, instead of him tht went, it was the reader. Reader just cant make the humanity lost their commander so when he is distracting (idk something happened) reader just take their horse n march with the soldiers, (then do ur magic DETAILS like ur erwin stories✨✨) n levi also decide not to save us like in the s3....shshsh i know this lame :33
❧ Content/Warnings: platonic levi x reader, season 3 spoilers, angst, mentions of injuries and blood, reader dies in the end 
❧ Word count: 3k
❧ Notes: this is a repost from my old blog
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Going back to shiganshina after all of these years was a huge deal. Especially after the glorious send-off you were given by the citizens of Wall Rose. You came back to reclaim Wall Maria after six long years, you’re taking back your land and defeating the titans that filled your hearts with terror, cause that’s what heroes do.
But in reality, it didn’t really feel that way to you. Instead of being the hero who’s facing their fear, you feel like a terrified child living in a nightmare.
You expected a fight with the titans, of course, you did. Taking back your land won’t come without a fight, without losses. And it’s not your first time facing titans.
You’ve been fighting them for years now, getting rid of them one after the other alongside your friends. Your records are filled with a decent number of kills and you are proud of it.
But this… this is different, you’ve never been in this situation before. You fought titans and you watched them kill your comrades in the worst ways imaginable, but never in your various years within the survey corps did you ever imagine that these monsters would show this tactical intelligence.
It made the hairs on the back of your neck stand on end. Titans are a nightmare on their own, with intelligence like that you’re surely done for.
When you came to shiganshina you expected a fight against the armored and the colossal, even the beast titan, but not a tactical war with pure titans that follow command, and most certainly not rocks killing your most skilled comrades and caging you against the wall.
Despite your fear, you felt a sarcastic chuckle slip past your lips. You’ve lived for years with nightmares of being eaten, and now you’re dying in a titan game of baseball, how pathetic.
Your eyes drifted to Erwin and Levi who were having a private conversation nearby as you tried to calm the panicking recruits. Erwin… your commander, your love, the man who never knew how to back down. He's not in the best physical state, but he just had to come along. He had to be here even though he knew he won't be able to fight.
Despite the fear eating at your heart, you kept your composure, that’s the least you owed your commander. After the recruits calmed down, you made your way to where Erwin and Levi stood. Their conversation halted as you stood in front of them, their eyes holding something unreadable in their depth.
"I'm hoping these looks mean you came up with a plan… " You spoke, your voice coming with the quiver you never hoped to show.
A moment of silence passed, a look shared between Erwin and Levi… if this meant anything then you weren’t about to hear good news. There was tension in the air as Erwin explained his plan to you. It was then that you understood the look in their eyes, you think a similar one can be seen in your eyes now.
It finally dawned on you that this is the end. There is no way out of this war alive. Erwin's plan had a single meaning; if you keep standing where you are, you'll be flattened by the rocks thrown at you by the beast, and if you fight back, you die. You'll have to give your lives so Levi could deal with the Beast Titan.
You always knew this day would come. A war with the titans can’t end without casualties. The survey corps numbers were always changing. These are all facts, but you had hoped it wouldn’t be like this.
The fear was eating at your insides, it’s impossible to face titans without it, but you knew ever since your very first day with the corps that you’ll have to be ready to give your life. You were ready to accept it… that is, until Erwin spoke up again.
"We'd have to ask these young people to give up their lives. You'd need the skills of a first-rate con man to come up with a reason that convincing, so I doubt any of them would charge forward unless I was leading the way."
His words are like a slap back to reality, it wasn’t just your life you were giving. All of your remaining comrades will have to give theirs too, including the commander. The survey corps are going to be wiped out in a crazy move of mass suicide. But it wasn’t only your lives that would have to be given, and all it took was one look in Erwin’s eyes to know where this was going.
"Which would mean I'd be the first to die, " Erwin said and you held your breath waiting for his next words "without ever learning… what was in that basement."
You knew it, you knew this was coming but it still hurt. Amid this chaos, you managed to forget the reason why Erwin insisted to be here in the first place.
'Oh, Erwin, if only you weren't so stubborn' The words were dancing on the tip of your tongue but you couldn’t speak.
Of course, Erwin has dreams, he’s just as much of a human as everyone here. While most of the corps were fighting for freedom or revenge, Erwin was fighting for the truth, for evidence that his father’s death meant something.
The look of shock on Levi’s face came nowhere close to the pain you felt. You joined the scouts for a purpose, too. Your dream was freedom, you hoped to be free of the confinement and the terror that the existence of the titans brought. But, now that you think about it, you did get a taste of freedom.
You were free from the confinement of the walls on your horse, feeling the air rushing through your hair and over your skin every time you went out on an expedition.
You were free of terror every time you raised your swords to cut through the nape of a titan’s neck. Every time you brought a titan down you had a taste of the freedom you were chasing.
And the people who fought for revenge, didn’t they get that too? They killed titans, they felt the satisfaction of getting rid of the enemy who hurt them and their loved ones.
The only dream that was never given a chance was Erwin’s. How unfair could the world be to take away the only chance from the man who helped give almost every soldier in the scouts a taste of their dreams? No… he can’t die, not yet.  
You let Erwin give his speech. That’s one thing that no one else can do. Erwin is the only one who can convince the recruits, crying out in fear, to stand tall and fight back as they take their last breaths of the air filled with the smell of dust and death.
As Erwin and the recruits were absorbed in their final thoughts and the speech, you slightly pulled on Levi’s sleeve pulling him back several steps.
The first step of your plan came into action as you answered Levi’s questioning look with a whisper “I want you to distract him.”
“What?” Levi asked, the confusion only growing on his face.
“I want you to distract Erwin. He is giving his speech, I’ll lead the recruits to their death,” you say, your whole being pleading that Levi would agree to help you. He has to, this won’t work out without his help.
“But—”
“Levi, please. The scouts still need him, you know that!” you pause glancing back at Erwin to make sure he’s not listening “When it’s time to move, I want you to pull him aside, tell him it’s something important. It’ll only take a few seconds, then you can carry out your part of the plan and kill the beast.”
“And how do you plan to stop Erwin from following you?”
“I’ll take any extra horses with me, he won’t be able to help you kill the beast and his odm gear won’t do much for him to follow after me,” you held your breath, your eyes pleading. This has to work “Please! Just do me this final favor.”
A moment passed as Levi glanced at Erwin then back to you, his expression unreadable. It was obvious your sacrifice isn’t just for the sake of the corps. “...Fine, but you’ll have to be quick”
“I’ll do my best… Thank you, Levi” the smile that spread across your face was blinding. It held so much gratitude, a final thank you combined with a goodbye.
It didn’t take long for Erwin’s words to give everyone back their composure. You helped everyone fall in line as fast as possible. You are running out of time. The houses around you are almost flattened. You have to move forward, this has to work. You can’t fail this, it has to be meaningful, for you, for the recruits who’ll pay their lives with you, for the whole of humanity… and most importantly, for Erwin.
Everyone is on their horses but it’s not time to move yet. You let your eyes meet Levi’s for one last time giving him a slight nod, signaling for him that you’re ready as you settled on your horse.
Levi stopped Erwin from riding his horse beside you, telling him there’s something important that he has to know first and pulling him aside. He walked Erwin as far from you and the recruits as possible without making it seem suspicious.
Erwin followed urgently after Levi not even allowing you one last look at his face. But that was ok, you didn’t need to see his face, it was already burned to the back of your eyelids.
It all took a few seconds, once you saw Levi and Erwin start talking you took hold of Erwin’s horse and started screaming encouragements for the recruits to charge as you rushed forward. Erwin’s shock had him freeze for a couple of seconds and that was enough for you.
You charged forward with the recruits right after you. Levi waited for a few more seconds to make sure Erwin wouldn’t follow after you. When he was sure you were far enough he took off towards his target, leaving Erwin standing there alone his eyes wide in shock.
Your screams of encouragement were so loud, louder than Erwin ever heard them. They were loud enough that even though you were too far away for him to follow he could still hear your voice filled with determination.
You didn’t look back, there was no reason to. This is the right decision, this plan will work and Erwin will lead what’s left of the scouts to victory. Your life is a small price to pay, it’s nothing compared to the rest of the lives that were already lost.
You can see the beast drawing his hand back, getting ready to shower you with the next round of crushed boulders. Your yelling never stopped even though your throat was running sore from all the screaming.
You didn’t stop when the flares were shot, not when the rocks started showering the frontline lead by you. You didn’t stop when the rocks started growing larger in your vision, you hardly even saw them. All you could see was the future, a bright one without the titans and the fear and the pain. You could see the past, the best and the worst of it. All the memories that you shared with every single one of your comrades.
You kept yelling for everyone to rush forward as tears ran down your face. It’s going to be ok, you had all you ever needed. It was time for you to follow through the same path your fallen comrades walked.
Your screams were cut short when the first rock hit you, sharp pain running through your whole body and the world started spinning as you fell off your horse. The tears still filling your eyes helped blind you, sharp whistles filling your ears and the ever-growing pain flowing through you in waves.
You could hear screams of the fallen around you, hidden behind the ringing in your ears. You could feel the air rushing across your skin as the soldiers rushed past you on their horses. Your mind was as paralyzed with pain as your body.
You just laid on the ground, your tear-filled eyes directed to the blue of the sky but the world has lost its color. It went on forever until you were numb, you have lost all feeling, the only thing you can hear is the sound of your heart growing faint as the blood pooled around your body.
You let your eyelids cover your eyes like curtains, your mind swimming somewhere between consciousness and an endless void. You could hardly feel a thing.
It almost felt like falling asleep, your grasp on reality slipping away. But through the back of your mind, the tiny part that was still conscious could feel your body being moved by someone and a rapid rush of air running across your skin.
It gave a jolt to your brain as if something is trying to pull you back to reality but you were too weak. All you wanted was some rest, you just wanted to sleep.
It was a shock to everyone that you’re still alive. You were in bad shape after losing so much blood. Your breath was faint, but it was there and it was enough for you to be revived by the injection. Armin’s state was worse, the fact he was still breathing was a complete miracle, his whole burned away.
Through your clouded consciousness, you could register voices and movement around your body that laid motionless close to Armin’s. It took everything in you to open your eyes, to try to make out the words being yelled back and forth around you.
Through your blurry vision, you could make out the outline of a face so close to yours, peering down at you. You couldn’t see clearly but you knew it was Erwin. Your hearing wasn’t fully registered but you could make out a few words, things like ‘Armin’, ‘Injection’, ‘need’, and your name.
Your foggy mind could barely understand what was going on, but questions started to fill up the part of your consciousness still present.
Were you dying? The last thing you remember is sharp pain rushing through you in waves, but it seems more like a distant memory.
Was Armin dying? If there are mentions of Levi’s injection then this surely is the case.
A few seconds passed when a new figure appeared in your limited line of vision looking down at you over Erwin’s shoulder. Both of them shifted around until the short figure disappeared again, leaving you with Erwin.
Erwin’s voice was so close to your ears, faint whispers about how it’s going to be alright falling past his lips. You felt a huge hand wrap gently around your forearm, followed by a sharp object touching your arm. The injection!
“No,” The barely audible whisper that left you halted Erwin’s actions as his eyes shot to your face “Did we win?”
It felt like too much time has passed before you heard Erwin’s reply “Yes, it’s over”
You were using up too much of your energy to fight back the fog filling your mind. Just a few seconds more, a few more and you’ll allow yourself some rest.
“Save… Armin” your voice was growing weaker, breaths growing shorter.
It broke Erwin’s heart. He was once again being selfish, everyone else chose to save you because you had more experience. To them, you were more valuable to the scouts, with the exception of Armin’s friends who couldn’t accept the fact of him dying.
And Erwin? He wasn’t much different. He wanted to save you because he needed to. He needed to scold you for the stupid move you pulled. He needed to tell you that he would’ve preferred dying by your side than be faced with your death. He needed you to live.
You didn’t understand, he can’t let you die. There was no time for him to explain how valuable you are to the scouts, how valuable you are to him.
He was about to ignore what you said, bring the syringe back to your arm again but with the almost non-existent strength you had, you pulled away.
“Armin” you whispered again, weakly. Your strength wasn’t enough for you to pull back completely, just slightly shift your arm away from the sharp needle, but it was enough to send your message across.
Erwin understood. You were never as selfish as him. You always made the decisions that would benefit the ones you care about most. Erwin took a shaky breath, the composure he usually kept was there for everyone’s eyes, but he wasn’t as composed on the inside.
Armin is a valuable soldier. He is an essential part of the scouts and you understood that. He should be the one to live. And Erwin knew this fight would make no difference if he couldn’t throw everything he had away.
He was ready to throw his dreams and his life away, but you chose for him. You decided he’d keep his life and dreams but in exchange, he’d have to give you up.
After injecting Armin and pulling your weak body away, Erwin stayed by your side. He kept his one hand placed on your heart, waiting for the faint beating to completely stop. And it would have lasted longer if you hadn’t used up so much energy.
To your weak mind, this was the right decision. Armin would do more change for the scouts, for humanity than you ever could. You had no regrets, you’ve got everything you ever asked for.
You allowed your eyes to rest again, let the energy leave your body. And with the last few seconds your breath was there, you could register one whisper. I love you.
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engagemachine · 3 years ago
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"You're so gentle," she tells me. They all say it. I hear it from my patients every time I take their arm to wrap the blood pressure cuff around it, or when I place my stethoscope on their belly, or when I rub circles into their back when I've helped them sit up on the side of the bed for the first time in three days. Sometimes they cry, because it's the first tender touch they've felt since they've been in the hospital. It's very humbling and at the same time very concerning -- why has no one else offered this tenderness to you? Why am I always the first?
But I don't feel gentle. Not when a pair of ribs are cracking beneath my hands as I'm doing chest compressions on a Covid patient who's stopped breathing--the second time I've administered CPR on a Covid patient in two days. I don't feel gentle when I'm wrestling with a patient and begging for them to keep their oxygen mask on. When I have to hold them down and hold them still so my coworker can draw a blood sample. I don't feel gentle when I'm inserting a nasogastric tube down someone's nose, then throat, and into their belly while they're gagging around the tube and their arms are flailing. And I don't feel gentle when I'm washing a sacral wound with bleach and they're crying because it hurts. I don't feel gentle when I have to shout, beg, and plead for patients to listen, when I tell patients they're going to die if they don't keep their oxygen mask on. I don't feel gentle when I have to place a patient in restraints, or when I call a family member and tell them that their loved one's condition hasn't improved. I don't feel gentle when a patient tells me they can't breathe, they can't breathe, I can't breathe, and I'm yelling for coworkers to call the doctor while I'm cycling through different oxygen masks and trying to administer medication to slow their respirations and calm their anxiety.
I'm writing this because I feel like I've been living a little bit behind a veneer on here, although I know deep down that's not really true; I have always wanted my blog to feel like a positive space for anyone and everyone, including myself. I come here to have fun and destress and that's why you usually don't see me reblogging content having to do with politics or global news. I think it's possible to create a healthy space where one does talk about those things and spreads awareness for important causes, but for me, Tumblr is where I come when I need to escape the harsh realities of real life. This is my platform where I can indulge in my fictional proclivities and interests, where I can appreciate art, photography, beautiful writing, my favorite films, music, and cute animals. That's what this space is about. I also have loved meeting new people and getting to know my readers and making new friends and chatting about my stories. That's why I'm here and I thank you all so, so much for indulging me in my passions and for encouraging my writing the way that you have: it has helped me weather the current storm of stress I am feeling in more ways than I could possibly convey.
But I have to be very honest with you all about how much I've been struggling lately, as I feel like I'm reaching a breaking point and I'm somewhat at a loss for how to handle it.
Since September of last year, I've been on an accelerated track to finish the degree I'm working towards, which is a Bachelor of Science in Nursing. I've been a nurse for four years, but I graduated from a two-year nursing program versus a four-year program because I wanted to get into the field earlier than some of my peers, which has been great. Anyway, my school counselor/mentor and I agreed that I could obtain my BSN in a year if I really pushed myself. The program I'm in is self-paced, which has been both a blessing and a curse. Most of my classes I have finished in about three to four weeks. Other classes, like biochemistry, took substantially longer, about seven or eight weeks, if I remember correctly. All of the classes have relied on my ability to self-teach, as there are no scheduled lectures to attend, only assigned readings and videos to watch, if you choose to do so. Fast forward to the end of May, when I went to visit some family, and, upon my return home, really started to lose some of my motivation to complete my classes. I was meant to finish my program in August (this month) but agreed with my mentor that I would take a short break and put my last three classes on hold so that I could resume the program in September. I've enjoyed approximately a month off from school, but "enjoyed" is a term I use loosely here as I was also picking up extra shifts at work because we've been so short staffed and losing nurses left and right.
Which brings me to the main cause of my stress. This pandemic has completely changed the landscape for how I administer care to my patients, and the stress of the care itself has been so utterly overwhelming at times I can hardly bear it. I broke down in tears at work on Sunday morning, shortly after 4:30 am, right there at the the nurse's station, and was sobbing so hard that my supervisor had to pull me away so that I could have some privacy. I wish I could tell you that I sobbed harder than I have in a long time--but I had sobbed at work with that same intensity just four weeks prior, only, I had been alone at the time. It's becoming a trend--I either cry at work or I cry at home--because the stress of this job has become unbearable.
I wish--I desperately wish--I could convey to you the seriousness of Covid. I think so much of the world has already decided to move on from it because they're so tired of having to deal with it and, quite simply, are ready to return to normal. I don't even know what normal is anymore and when--or if--we'll ever be able to return to it. And that has caused me a fair amount of stress and anxiety in and of itself. I miss traveling so much and I don't know when I'll be able to do it again. I haven't seen one of my best friends since the fall of 2018 for this reason, which kills me.
I've seen so much death. Transferred so many patients to the PCU and ICU. Frantically chased patients' oxygen saturation, trying to keep them from circling the drain. Being responsible for six or seven human lives at one time is a stress you cannot fathom unless you have done it yourself. I have cried with a patient, a young woman, who had lost her husband to Covid only hours before in the ER, a young woman who was now faced with battling Covid herself but also planning the funeral of her high school sweetheart from her hospital bed. I have wheeled a patient to the ICU so that he could say one final goodbye to his wife--married for over 50 years--before they pulled the plug and removed her from the ventilator. I have raced down the hallway with my patient on BIPAP, pushing his bed to the ICU and praying that he doesn't stop breathing on the way there. I've had to console crying family members over the phone who are worried about their loved ones, not to mention my crying coworkers who are as overwhelmed as I am. These are just a handful of experiences from the past month alone. There are so many more.
The discomfort of my job has become secondary. I expect, now, to be wearing an N95 for a full twelve or thirteen-hour shift because there isn't time to take it off. Not having a chance to pee or go to the bathroom during that time. Not drinking any water until I'm in my car and taking off my mask and finally taking a deep breath.
On a more personal note, I am continuing to lose weight and it's so discouraging. In high school I used to wear a size 2 or 4. Now, depending on the brand, I wear a double 00. My hair is falling out because of my stress. I haven't slept during the night in... I don't even know how long. I'm constantly tired. Exhaustion hits me like a great tidal wave and I am powerless to stop it. I expect now to crash during the middle of the day on my couch, only to wake up at 11pm and be wide awake for the rest of the night, and, if not wide awake, then in an out of nightmares and sleep paralysis. I have thought about leaving my job, but the idea of job hunting during a pandemic, and while I'm in school... it just makes me feel even more stressed.
I need a break, but it feels like there's nowhere to go to escape. I fantasize about some great adventure, going somewhere I've never been, but I also really miss my family and I'm scared to go home to visit.
This post doesn't really have a conclusive ending. I'm just exhausted and overwhelmed. Any prayers/thoughts would be greatly appreciated.
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ask-mingle · 3 years ago
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MINGLE - BREAK/GOODBYE
So… I need to take a break from Mingle. And not just for vacation. Longer break. The kind of break I… might not return from.
NO MORE MINGLE? Now, that does not mean I won’t be posting anything ever again as Mingle. I may do something from time to time, if I’ll feel like it. And I will most likely sometimes take some commissions too, as I can’t really afford not to do it once in a while. And who knows, maybe one day I’ll return full-time, depending on how my situation will develop, so this is not a definite good-bye.
WHY? The reason is – I want to try other things. Over the six years I was doing Mingle I had a ton of other ideas and projects I wanted to take on. Unfortunately I do have very little time to draw every day. And it was just too easy for me to always choose doing something for this blog, when finally having some time, and creative energy. I mean – with her I knew I was going to make a good amount of people happy with every post. I developed a small fandom waiting eagerly for more, and I even managed to make some money with Patreon and commissions, so how can anything else compete for my attention? But the truth is I am getting weary. I love this character, and people she allowed me interactions with to no end, but I think it’s time to let go, give a chance to other projects, distance myself. That is also why I’m making it an official statement, even despite not cutting myself off completely, and knowing I will drop by from time to time, or even return completely if one day my enthusiasm will get refreshed. I really need it to be a decision, not just shy attempts to fade out with time. I’m sorry, and I hope You’ll understand. INTERESTING NEWS! But, I do have some announcement regarding this situation, that may pick Your interest :O
PATREON: I would not feel good knowing that I’m not going to produce any more content and still taking money from my supporters. And of course since it’s important for me to let go, I obviously won’t be able to make any more Patreon rewards. Buuuut… that also means this might be the best time ever to become my Patron for a moment ;3 Hear me out.
I have 148 posts on my Patreon ( https://www.patreon.com/askmingle ) now. About 20 of them are stories from Mingle’s life (which are canon!) and about 120 are small naughty pictures. And I’m not done yet – I have rewards for August and September already prepared, which means there will be two more stories and pictures (the last one will be also kind of a send-off for my Patrons, but as it does only involve my current ones – just to be clear). I will also post one bonus text with some interesting Mingle behind the scenes facts X3 So, I’m not saying anything, but some of You might find some value there ;3
After that however there will be no more new content. I don’t want to really close my Patreon account, as that will wipe-out all the posts and comments, and that’d be a shame, since it’s a nice archive :/ So I’m not sure how I’ll go on to deal with that situation. I’ll consult my Patrons about that too, but most likely I’ll leave just one cheap tier, after everybody leaves and then I’ll figure it out.
HALLOWEEN POSTS: Okay, so – I can’t say anything for sure, but the tradition of making Halloween poll and then turning a winner into a full art is by far my favorite activity here XD I can’t promise that this particular tradition will stay… but I’ll say it’s more likely than not X3
COMIC: This thing is tearing me apart. I want to finish it one day, I really do… but at the same time it’s getting to the part that… might not make sense to be shown if Mingle isn’t here to stay much more. I mean… You may think about her waaaaay differently after that, so maybe some secrets are better kept as such. I mean, it would be her/my style, wouldn’t it? ;3 But alas this is something, that unfinished will definitely stay I the back of my head, so it may one day just force me to finish it.
END So, that is it. Thank You all for staying with me and bringing me so much joy for so long. Really no matter if You were here for the 6 years I’m doing it, or if You found me just today, I do appreciate You greatly and I will always be grateful for having You here :3 Best wishes to all of You, and good luck with everything You’re set out to do too.
Yours lovingly, Mingle (P.S. In case Mingle returns one day with full force – the in-universe explanation for her absence is… well, she’s pursuing a mystery she keeps a secret, so she set out on the journey. But she knows this one is the one she may not return from (expecting that she may be forced/wanted to stay where she goes, not die, so don’t worry X3 ) so she said goodbye’s in advance ;3 )
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msmarvelouswinchester · 4 years ago
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Invisible String
Summary - Dean Winchester was never a man who would freely speak about his feelings and emotions. The reader, is his best friend of many years but some wrong choices and words of Dean's pushes a the reader away.
Pairing - AU Dean Winchester x Reader
Warnings - Fluff (lots of fluff), angst-ish, swearing, mentions of abusive relationship, mentions of bad parenting, cheating
Square filled - Bestfriend AU ( @spndeanbingo )
Word count - 6150
A/N - This is written for @supernatural-jackles' Bi-weekly challenge. The prompts are in bold. Spn dividers by the amazingly talented @talesmaniac89 (go check her blog out) Beta'd by @mariekoukie6661 (she is a sweetheart for agreeing to take a look at this long fic. Thank you💕)
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“So what are we watching?” You asked as you slumped down on the yellow couch. You were dead on your feet after a long week of work but you just couldn't break tradition and not hang out with your best friend like every friday. Pulling the comforter close to your body, you let out a sigh of contentment. Truth be told, no matter how exhausted you were, you always looked forward to movie night.
“I picked the movie last friday, now it's your turn,” Dean handed you a bottle of beer and took a seat beside you. Your eyes sparkled with a glint of mischief, a knowing smile appeared on your face as Dean's lips curled up in disgust. “No chick flicks,” he warned.
“I get to call dibs on the movie tonight so I picked,” you paused for a second to create a dramatic effect, “The Proposal.”
“No!” Dean cried out in horror.
“Oh come on, it is not going to be that bad. Ryan Reynolds and Sandra Bullock are in that movie.” you winked at him, making him groan and he picked up a cushion to cover his face, “Now, now don't be so dramatic.” He removed the cushion from his face and glared at you. He opened his mouth to say something but was cut off by the sound of the doorbell. “Pizza's here!” He exclaimed as he got up to open the door. You turned on the tv, opened Netflix and put on the movie.
“I don't understand how we can be best friends,” Dean grumbled as he came back to the room, “you eat your pizza with pineapple on it.” “It tastes good. You should try it one day.” you said and took the two boxes of food from his hand, setting them down on the table in front.
“Are you kidding me? Even if that becomes the only food available on earth, I still won't eat it. You can't put fruits on pizza,” he said, and took a slice from his own pizza and nestled into the comforter beside you.
“Tomato is a fruit, De,” you said, biting into the slice in your hand. You heard him mutter something under his breath which you ignored and shifted your focus to the movie playing on the screen. Halfway through the movie, you yawned and snuggled into your best friend. He wrapped his warm hands around you, pulling you closer to him. “You want to head back now?” He asked softly, leaning in to kiss your forehead.
“Nuh-uh,” you said, “I want to finish the movie. I need to see if Andrew got Margaret back .” That elicited a chuckle from Dean, the vibrations of his laugh shaking your body a little.
“You're so stubborn and they are gonna find each other, it's a chick flick for God's sake,” he said, “they love each other, clearly.”
“Speaking of love, Cas asked me out,” you said, making Dean sit up straight. “What'd you say?” He asked
“Yes obviously. I need to dive back into the dating life,” you shrugged, “and Cas seems like a good guy.”
“He is but I thought you wanted to wait because of what happened with you know ‘ he who must not be named’,” he said, and you picked up the remote to pause the movie.
“I can't live in the past. I need to move on. It has been two years since I've gone on a date and it's not like I'm getting engaged tomorrow. It's just a date,” you said, messing with the loose end of the comforter.
“As you wish. I'm just looking out for you.”
“I know. You always do,” you said, giving Dean a tight hug, “and I kinda miss doing it.”
“Doing what?” “Sex,” Dean's eyebrows shot up, “oh come on, it's not like I didn't use to have sex with….him.”
“So,” he gulped, “so you m-miss doing….it?”
“Kind of. My fingers are not enough, you know what I mean right?”
“Of course, of course,” Dean cleared his throat, blush crept up his neck.
“And it's not just sex, I miss the physical touch, I miss those things that are part of a relationship,” you said, “I need this and I think I'm ready.”
“If you think you're ready, then it's fine. I just don't want to see my best friend with a broken heart again.” he said, his fingers getting entangled in your hair, as he slowly massaged your scalp.
“That feels good,” you moaned, “after that hell of a meeting with Azazel, I needed this night De. Thank you for always being there.”
“You're my best friend. I'll always be there when you need me even if you make me watch stupid romcoms.” he grinned, “Azazel creating problems again?”
“He never seems to approve of the templates and designs I make no matter how hard I try to make them loveable and on the other hand, the shitty designs made by Abaddon always gets approved.” you groan.
“Why don't you change jobs?”
“I can't. It's not that simple. Life's going good. I don't want to disrupt it by going on a job hunt.” you sighed.
“What if you start working for my company?” You immediately turned your head towards Dean and looked at him with surprise clear in your eyes.
“No.” “Why not?
“I'm a graphic designer, De. I'm not built to work in your company,” you said.
“Be my PA. I really need a personal assistant to help me keep upto date with my schedule and I'm a mess after Charlie left.” Dean said.
“But what is my job criteria? That I'm your best friend? It's like taking advantage of you. I can't do that.”
“What if you work as my PA after being interviewed for the job?” He asked. “Fine, maybe I can give it a shot,” you said.
“Awesome! Meet me in my office on Monday, ten in the morning, sharp. I don't tolerate tardiness.” he said, slipping quickly in the work mode.
“Aye, aye captain.” You giggled, but a deep frown soon appeared on your face.
“What?” “What if it messes up our relationship?”
“It won't. I know how to separate my work life from my personal one,” Dean assured.
“I guess, then it's okay,” you smiled.
“So about your date with Cas. Where's he taking you?”
“I have no idea,” you chuckled, “he said it will be a surprise.”
“That's-that's great but he should know that you hate surprises,” Dean raised an eyebrow.
“He doesn't know me very well. I'll let that pass this one time,” you told Dean.
“Fair enough,” he laughed. You yawned once more, as you tried to fight the drowsiness that was threatening to take over you.
“You want to head back home now or you want to crash here tonight, sleepyhead?” Dean smiled.
“I don't think I can drive all the way in such a state. Do you mind if I crash here?” You grinned, knowing very well he didn't mind because you crashed in his guest rooms on most of the Friday nights. He rolled his eyes as he got up from the couch.
“I'll prepare the guest room.” You sleepily nodded at him. You didn't realise you had fallen asleep but you were soon woken up when you felt your body move.
“Sorry, didn't mean to wake you up. I'm taking you to bed,” you found yourself in Dean's arms as he headed towards the guest room with you, “you looked too peaceful sleeping. Go back to sleep.” He softly murmured. Dean gently placed you in the bed, pulling the cover upto your chest as you snuggled into the warmth of the covers. Within a few minutes, you had dozed off.
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“Morning, sunshine. Pancakes for you,” Dean's loud voice woke you up from your deep slumber the next morning. You sat up in your bed, as you rubbed the sleep from your eyes, the smell of pancakes hitting your nose.
“Breakfast in bed for my girl. Listen I gotta run to the office now,” he said as he handed you the plate of freshly cooked pancakes to you.
“It's Saturday!” You exclaimed.
“I know but Benny wanted to sign the deal with our company today. It's an important one, we can't let that go out of our hands,” he made you understand, “I'll be back within a few hours.”
“Sufe fing. I wif ve here,” you spoke with your mouth full, “Sure thing. I will be here.” You repeated your words after swallowing your food.
“Maggie will drop by. If you want to leave the house before I return, give the keys to her.” He said as he went back into his room to put his suit on.
“Hot damn,” you let out a low whistle as Dean stepped out of the room in his black suit, “Go get the deal, cowboy!” Dean did a full body laugh at your words, throwing his head backwards before he bid you goodbye and walked out of the door leaving you alone in his penthouse. Finishing your breakfast, you got up and got freshened up for the day. You picked up your phone and saw three texts from Cas.
“Meet me at 7.” “At the Season's 52.” “I'm looking forward to this.”
A smile crept onto your face, as you read the texts from him. “I need your help,” you shot a text to Ruby, “I've a date tonight. I don't know what to wear.” You waited for her to text back but instead of getting a text, you got a call from her.
“He finally asked you out?” She screamed from the other side of the phone.
“What do you mean “finally”?” You wondered.
“Oh come on, Y/N. How long have you two known each other?” “Uh-two months.”
“Two-wait, two months? You don't have a date with Dean?” She asked.
“No! Why would you think that?” You exclaimed, “Cas asked me out.”
“Cas? As in Castiel Novak? Dean's friend? And Dean's okay with it?”
“What's with the twenty questions, Ruby?” You said, annoyed at her questions, “And yes. Dean's fine with it. Why wouldn't he be? He is dating Lisa, in case you didn't remember. Now will you help me? I need a dress for tonight.”
Ruby agreed to go on a little shopping spree with you to find the perfect dress. Handing over the keys to Maggie, the housekeeper, you shot a text to Dean letting him know you were leaving his house. You waited for some time but he didn't text you back. You shrugged it off thinking he was probably busy with the meeting. Your whole afternoon was spent with Ruby as you tried to find a good dress for the date. She made you try on what seemed like a hundred dresses of different colours and style until a green bottleneck dress finally caught your eyes.
“This is a beautiful dress! You gotta try it on,” Your friend insisted.
“You sure? Look at the price - it's too expensive,” you pouted.
“Do you want to get laid tonight?” Ruby quirked her eyebrow.
“Yeah-I mean no….maybe,” you stutter.
“That dress - Cas won't be able to take his eyes off you tonight,” she smiled.
“Fine, if you insist.” Needless to say, the dress was a perfect fit but it was all for nothing.
Tapping on the hardwood of the table, you let out a frustrating sigh. Tears pricked at your eyes as you took a sip of the drink.
“Ma'am do you-are you going to-”
“Please bring the check. I'm done here,” you said, barely managing to keep your tears at bay. The waitress nodded and walked away from your table. You dialed up your best friend’s number and waited for him to pick up.
“Dean,” you said, sniffling a little as he picked up his phone after the third ring. “Y/N, you okay?” Dean asked.
“Yeah, yeah. Can you,” you cleared your throat, “Can you pick me up? I'm at Season’s 52.”
“Sure,” you heard shuffling on the other side, “I'll be there as soon as possible.”
“Okay,” you replied.
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“He just didn't show up,” you sniffled as Dean drove yourselves back to his house.
“Maybe-maybe he had his reasons,” Dean said, throwing a worried glance at your way.
“Reasons?” You scoffed.
“Cas is a good man. This is very unlike him,” Dean said.
“Am I-am I not good enough, Dean?” “Y/N, you know that's not true. You're pretty, smart, a little badass - you are a good person with a kind heart,” Dean smiled.
“Then why? Why didn't he show up? He could have left a message. I'm telling you Dean, I'm so over men now. All men are the same,” you looked at him, “except you.”
“Thanks, sweetheart. That is good to hear.”
“I sure do know how to choose,” you grumbled.
“Y/N, it's just one bad date. So what? Cas is not the only man in the whole world. You'll find someone,” Dean said, pulling into his driveway.
“I don't think so. Maybe he was right,” you opened the door of the car to step out.
“Who?”
“Alistair. Maybe he is right. Maybe the problem is me,” you said, tears pooling in your eyes. Dean grabbed your hands and pulled you back into the car.
“No. He is not right. Alistair will never be right. He was an abusive and manipulative son of a bitch. Listen to me, you are not the problem, sweetheart,” he said, “those men just don't understand you.”
“Is that why no one sticks around?” You turned around to face him with wet eyes.
“I did and I will always be there for you,” he said, his hands cupping your face.
“I know, De,” you leaned into his touch as his thumb gently caressed your cheeks. You opened your mouth to speak but were cut off by three harsh taps on the car window. Dean immediately opened the door and stepped out.
“Lisa.” He said.
“Unbelievable, Dean!” Lisa exclaimed. You couldn't see her face but you knew she was furious.
“It's not what it looks like,” Dean whispered.
“You just up and left me in the morning and now when I get back to talk things out, I find you cozying up to her. I'm done with you!” She yelled back. You shrunk back into your seat when you heard her scream. Dean didn't even tell you that he had broken up with her. You wondered why he hid it from you.
“I already said we were over Lisa, just go back home,” Dean said and brought his hand down his face.
“Three years of relationship meant nothing to you! Why?” Lisa shoved Dean, making him stumble back a little.
“I don't owe you an explanation, okay?”
“You cheating asshole-” “I didn't cheat on you, Lisa. I-I'm just not in love with you anymore,” Dean said, making her scoff.
“Have a nice life, asshole!” Lisa said and you heard her retreating footsteps. You stepped out of the car and saw Dean standing against the car, with his face buried in his hands.
“Hey, you okay?” You rubbed his arm gently.
“Yeah. I'm sorry you had to hear that,” he sighed.
“Why didn't you tell me you broke up with her?” You asked.
“It wasn’t important.” “Not important? You let me ramble all the way from the restaurant to your house but not once did you tell me you broke up with her,” you said.
“Y/N, I'm fine. Can we drop this now?” He snapped at you, “I'm sorry.”
“S’okay,” you gave him a sad smile, “I've an idea.”
“Does this idea include booze?” “What do ya think?” “I'm in.”
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“What time is it?” You groaned as bright light hit your eyes. The throbbing pain in your head increased as you opened your eyes, trying to focus on the human figure standing in your doorway.
“You got wasted last night, sweetheart,” Dean grinned.
“Stop talking. Just stop talking,” you groaned and nestled deep into your covers.
“Aspirin. You will need these,” he kept the medicine on the nightstand, and walked away, “Breakfast is ready.”
“Morning, how's the hangover?” He gave you a cheeky smile as you walked into the dining room a few minutes later. Dean had his laptop opened in front of him, a cup of coffee beside the electronic device. “You're enjoying this too much, aren't ya? How come you're not hung-over?” You grumbled, “I'm hungry.”
“Here. I made waffles because my heartbroken, hung-over best friend needs her comfort food. Dig in,” he said and pushed a plate of waffles towards you, “I didn't drink much.”
“I thought we were drinking because you had a breakup.” “I told you already I'm not feeling miserable. See there's this girl I like who is not Lisa. I'm thinkin’ of asking her out so I did what I had to do. I ended things with Lisa,” Dean said.
“How come you never told me about this girl?” You narrowed your eyes at him. “‘Cause I wasn't sure how I felt but two days ago I saw her and I just knew that she is the one I want to be with,” he smiled.
“You're such a sap.” You giggled, “she must be very special.”
“She is very special. I have never met a girl like her,” he said, staring at you, “now, eat up.”
“Mhm,” you moaned, taking a bite of the waffles on your plate, “you know, you should give up your business and open up a coffee shop. You make excellent waffles.”
“Sorry sweetheart, no can do. People at work will miss me too much,” he chuckled, “you do remember you are interviewing for the position of PA tomorrow?”
“Yep but I don't know if I will get it or not. I have heard the CEO of the company is kind of a shithead,” you grinned.
“Oh really?” Dean looked at you with amused eyes, “You're terrible.”
“Yeah, so I've heard.” You laughed.
He shook his head at you, “Listen, I have a favour to ask.” “Shoot.”
“I would like it if you could accompany me to Sam and Jess’ anniversary party tonight,” he said.
“Tonight?” “Yeah. I know it's very sudden but it completely sli-”
“I'll go with you but I thought you told me that after what happened with your Dad last time, you wouldn't be attending another family gathering,” you said.
“Uh-huh. Sam insisted that I attend this party,” he replied.
“Fine I'll be there with you at the party to save you from John Winchester,” you giggled.
“You'll be my knight in shining armour tonight.” He chuckled.
You went back to your apartment to get ready for the party. Dean had told you that he would be picking you up at six that evening. As you touched up on your makeup, you heard three knocks on your door.
“Good evening, Y/N,” Dean smirked, looking dapper in a black two-piece suit.
“Good evening, Dean. I'll be out in a minute,” you blushed when you saw his eyes travel all over your body.
“You look beautiful, sweetheart,” he said.
“Thanks.”
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“De-” you snaked placed your hand over his, as you both sat inside the Impala with her engine turned off.
“I can't do this Y/N. I can't face John Winchester again, not after the crap he pulled last time,” he gritted out the words, his knuckles turning white as he held the steering wheel tightly, staring off at the direction of his house.
“Why are you here?” He looked at you in surprise. “I-Sam asked me to be here,” he said.
“Exactly. Your little brother asked you to be here so you will go into that house and attend your brother's party. It's up to you if you want to make any small talk, I'll be there with you but Dean you can't avoid your father forever-”
“I'm not avoiding him,” Dean said.
“Yes, you are. Now go in there, ask him why he did that, demand answers from him,” you said.
“I-okay, let's go. Just don't leave my side tonight or someone might get hurt,” he said.
“You're not going to punch your Dad,” you mumbled, “even though he deserves it.” He chuckled at your words as you two stepped out of the car.
“I'll never get used to the fact that you grew up in a mansion,” you smirked.
“It's not a mansion. It's a….big house,” he smiled.
“Yep, whatever you say.” As soon as you stepped through the door of the mansion, Dean was immediately pulled into a hug. “I thought you wouldn't show up,” Sam said, letting go of his brother, “Hey Y/N.”
“Almost didn't,” the older Winchester replied as you gave the younger one a small wave. “He showed up, didn't he? What about Mom?”
“Mom and Dad are in the living room. Last thing I saw they are not speaking to each other even when they are in the same room. I just want everyone to act civil till the party's over,” Sam said, “Drinks are in the kitchen.”
“So kitchen first, living room later. Keep John out of my sight and everything will be perfect,” Dean patted his brother's shoulder and made his way towards the kitchen, taking you with him. Pouring himself a glass, he handed you one.
“Dean,” a deep voice came from the doorway, making Dean stand up straight. “Sam had one job. Dad.” He looked at John and gave him a curt reply.
There was a moment of awkward silence as no words were exchanged between the father and the son. You could feel Dean trying his level best to keep himself from screaming at his Dad. You put a hand on his shoulder, trying to calm him down.
“I know you don't want to see me right now-” “You're right and you may leave now,” Dean said and turned his back towards his father.
“Son. You have to understand, it was a long time back and I didn't know what was going through my head. I-” John sighed.
“You what? You had a perfect family here. A wife, two sons. And all this time, you knew about Adam but you said nothing. You kept up with the charade of the perfect husband and father when in reality you were neither of them,” Dean gritted out.
“Dean. Maybe I was not the perfect husband but I did everything for you and Sam,” the older man said in a harsh tone.
“Really? You did everything? You were nothing but an absent father. I was there to take care of Mom and Sammy while you were away on your so-called business trips when actually you were plowing another woman's field,” Dean growled at his father.
“Dean!” His father snapped back.
“Mr. Winchester you should leave now,” you said, trying to diffuse the situation before it got out of hand, “John, please.”
“This is family matter Y/N. You have no right to get involved in this,” John retorted.
“Don't speak to her like that. She is more family to me than you ever were,” Dean said and stalked towards his Dad, “so you can leave now. I'm sure as hell Mom is not talking to you so you can get the hell out of this house now, John.”
“Dean-” “Now,” Dean growled.
“I would do what he says, John,” you said. John scoffed, turning around and got out of the house. Dean plopped down on one of the chairs in the kitchen, gently rubbing his temples.
“You sure you're okay?” “I need a stronger drink,” he murmured.
“I saw Dad leave. What happened?” Sam came into the kitchen and asked as he looked at his brother.
“I told you to keep John away from me. You had one job,” Dean snapped and stormed out of the room, grabbing a glass of drink with him.
“He just needs some time to cool down. John came to talk to Dean and-”
“Yeah I understood. I'm gonna check on Mom. This party was a mistake,” Sam said and left the kitchen leaving you standing there alone.
You squeezed your eyes shut as you finished up your drink. You were angry at John too. He had hurt Dean, your best friend. He was a liar and you hated liars. You needed to go find Dean. You placed the empty glass on the counter and made your towards the door but you stopped dead in your tracks when you saw him.
“Cas,” you said, “I didn't expect you to be here.”
“Yeah well, Sam is a good friend so he invited me over.” Cas gave you a smile.
“Oh.” You nodded.
“We should probably address the elephant in the room,” he gave an awkward laugh.
“Huh? Oh you mean how you stood me up last night?” You glared at him.
“Well you didn't tell me that you were looking for only a one night stand? I would have backed out sooner. I like you Y/N but I don't do one night-”
“Wait, hold on. Who told you I was looking for a one time, no strings attached thing?”
“Dean told me,” your jaw dropped onto the floor at his confession, “I'm sorry Y-”
“S’okay.” You brushed him off, “I need to have a word with Dean, have you seen him?”
“I think he was talking to Kevin over there,” Cas pointed you towards another room.
“Thanks and it's okay, Cas. We're cool.” You said and almost ran your way into the other room.
“I'm telling you man, you deserve someone better than Y/N. She is clingy and she doesn't take no for an answer. I can give you her number but-” Dean turned around and his eyes locked with your wet ones. You shook your head at him, a look of betrayal evident on your face. You heard him call out to you as you turned on your heels and ran towards the door. “Excuse me, Kevin,” Dean said and went after you but by that time you were already out of the house. “Y/N!” He called, as you pulled out your phone to call for an uber.
“Fuck you!” You exclaimed, “I'm clingy, I don't take no for an answer. Is that what you think of me? All this time while you pretended to be my best friend, is this what went through your head?” Tears were running down your face now, “how many times was I there for you when you needed me and this is how you repay me?”
“I didn't mean to say it like that. You are my best friend Y/N-”
“You are a fuckin’ liar! You told Cas that I was looking for a person to keep my bed warm for only one night. Why? You know what, I don't want to talk to you right now. Leave me alone,” you said.
“No, please,” he took a step towards you. “Don't you dare make a move!” You screamed, “You lied to me and I hate liars more than anything. You are no better than your Dad. I hate you! I regret that I ever thought of you as my best friend.” You heard shuffling behind you and turned around to see him leaving. A sob tore from your throat. Standing there alone on the porch of the Winchester mansion, with your smudged makeup, you waited for the uber to show up.
It took you one hour to finally reach your house. Your phone was getting blown up by messages from the Winchester brothers and Ruby. You broke down in tears as soon as you reached your house. You crawled underneath the covers without bothering to get out of your dress or to remove your makeup. Your body shook as you continued to sob loudly into the pillow. The same man, who acted as your rock when you had left Alistair, gave you shelter in his house when you showed up in the middle of the night because your ex-boyfriend was drunk and was on a rampage, was the one who continued to spew lies about you behind your back. Your trust was shattered just like your heart and you didn't know how to piece them back together. The crying had tired you out and in no time you slipped into a deep slumber with Dean's words haunting your dream.
Morning came way too quickly. You woke up to Ruby knocking on your door along with Dean calling your phone. Your eyes were red and swollen as a result of crying all night long.
“What happened? Who's ass do I need to kick?” Ruby barged into your house as soon as you opened the door as saw you had been crying.
“....Dean.” “Dean? Dean Winchester?” Her eyes widened in surprise which later turned to anger when you told her everything that had happened the day before. Ruby was furious and if Dean was there in the room, he would have been a dead man.
“Oh Y/N,” Ruby cooed as she pulled you into a hug, “I didn't know it was this bad. Sam called me to check on you because you left his house in a hurry. I'm gonna kill Dean Winchester.” You held onto her tightly as sobs racked through your body. She gently caressed your head while cursing the green-eyed Winchester.
You were miserable but what you didn't know is that your ex-best friend was also losing his mind over the incident. The guilt was eating him up alive and he didn't know how to fix it. Sam had punched him in the face and kicked him out of his house when he had told him what happened.
“Tell her the truth or don't ever talk to me again,” Sam had threatened his brother. With red eyes and a swollen cheek, Dean went into his office the next morning. He hoped that after the interview he would get a chance to apologise but you never showed up.
“Okay, Mr. Winchester, that was the last interviewee,” Jody poked in her head into the room. “That was the last? What about uh-Y/N L/N?” Dean asked.
“Uh-she dropped out - called us early in the morning to let us know she won't make it to the interview,” Jody smiled, “I need your decision fast.”
“Decision?” “Who we are hiring for the position of the PA,” she said.
“Sure. I'll let you know. You can go now Jody. Close the door on your way out,” Dean said.
He sighed as he dialed your number, “It's Y/N L/N. She can't get to her phone now. Please leave a message.”
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“Y/N, sweetheart I'm sorry. You shouldn't have dropped out of the interview. I know you won't ever forgive me but I'm sorry.” You sniffled as you heard his voice message. He had left you exactly fifty-three texts, twenty three missed calls and seventeen voice messages - all had the same words, ‘I'm sorry’ but you couldn't forgive him.
“Stop listening to that asshat,” Ruby grumbled and snatched your phone from you. “I-I just can't understand why he did that? I thought he was my friend,” you sniffled.
“I'm sorry Y/N,” Ruby took a seat beside you and wrapped you in a comforter, “I brought ice cream with me. I heard they work wonders on a broken heart.”
“And you brought my favourite flavour. Thanks!” You hugged but were interrupted by the sound of your doorbell.
“Stay here. Let me check,” Ruby said and went towards the door. Opening it, she stared at a disheveled, sad Dean Winchester.
“Give me one good reason to not kick you out right now,” Ruby glared at Dean.
“I need to talk to her. Please,” Dean’s voice cracked at the end.
“No you won't. She is miserable and I won't let you break her even more,” Ruby challenged, “Now get out.”
“I don't care if I have to fight you but please let me see her,” he pleaded.
“You are one stubborn, lying piece of shit,” Ruby grumbled.
“Why are you here?” the two heads turned immediately towards you.
“I wasn't sure you wanted to see me but I had to see you,” Dean said.
“And why exactly?” Ruby snapped.
“Ruby. It's okay. Let him in. I need to hear him out.” Dean gave Ruby a side eye and let himself in.
“Y/N,” She started. “I'll be fine," you assured her.
“If you need me to kick him out or kick his ass, just call me,” she glared at Dean once more and left your apartment.
“She's scary,” the green-eyed man said. “Well she has to. She just saw her friend with a broken heart,” you threw him his words back.
“I can't tell you how sorry I am,” Dean said, his head hung in shame.
“Why?” He looked up at you, “I don't know,” he replied, making you scoff.
“You don't know? Well maybe because you actually thought of me to be clingy and the girl who doesn't take no for an answer,” you seethed, “and you even lied to Cas about me. You framed me as some whore who doesn't do relationships. Fuck you, Dean! You knew better than anyone how long it took me to get over Alistair. How could you do this to me?”
“I don't know,” he whispered, “It's just I lied to them because I didn't want them to be with you.”
“It's my life! I get to decide who I want to have sex with and who I want to date,” you hissed.
“Well I couldn't let you make those decisions because I didn't want you to choose them. I wanted you to choose me.” he blurted out. You sat there dumbfounded as you heard his confession, "What? Why?"
“Because...I love you,” Dean muttered.
“You love me?” “Yeah.”
“What are you, a kindergartener? Next thing I know you will be pulling my pigtails,” you sassed.
“I'm sorry. You know I'm bad with feelings-” “So you decided to lie?”
“Yeah.” “You're terrible, you know that,” you said.
“So I have heard,” he shrugged. “Come here you idiot,” you beckoned at him. He went towards you and sat down beside you.
“I'm sorry. I never meant to hurt you. I was just-” “What? You were just fending off the boys?”
“Yeah. At first I was scared that I was falling for my best friend and you knew me, you knew all my horrible secrets, the thoughts that are inside my head which keep me up at night and I was scared that you wouldn't feel the same. I broke up with Lisa for you because whenever I closed my eyes at night I wanted it to be you with me, not Lisa.” You were stunned at his confession. Dean never talked about his feelings, he was extremely good at hiding his feelings so hearing him blurt out about how he felt, surprised you.
“Dean,” you said. “No. I need to say this,” he said, stopping you, “I don't know if you feel the same. Even if you did, I don't think I have a chance after the stunt I pulled yesterday. But sweetheart, you mean everything to me, I swear to never hurt you again. I was planning on asking you out after the party but Kevin had asked for your number so I told him all those lies about you but sweetheart I know what I did….said is unforgivable but please I need you. I need my best friend back.” He looked at you, locking his teary eyes with yours.
“I don't know whether to kiss you or hit you,” you said, wiping away the single tear that rolled down your cheek. “K-kiss me?” Dean’s eyes went wide.
“You are the most horrible person I have ever met. I hate you, Dean but I hate me more that I decided to fall for this horrible person that I call my best friend. Kiss me, before I change my mind,” you said and that's all Dean needed before he crashed his lips into yours. It was a harsh kiss but one filled with longing and love. His hands sneaked to the back of your head, his fingers entangled with your hair as your hands held on to his biceps.
“I'm sorry for hurting you,” he said after he let go of your lips. You sat there with his hands cupping your face, your foreheads touching. “Next time, talk to me,” you whispered.
“I will,” he kissed your forehead, “So Y/N L/N, can I take you out for dinner tomorrow night?” “Definitely Dean Winchester, but mind you I'm tough to impress,” you smirked.
“I have plans, special plans for a special girl. I will make you mine,” he said before he leaned in to capture your lips with his once again.
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random-mha-thoughts · 4 years ago
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Flock Together (LoV x Reader)
Pairing: League of Villains x Reader, platonic relationship
Appearances by Dabi, Shigaraki, and Mr. Compress
@dastfast678 requested: “Could you make a another LOV X child!reader, one where the hero's try to "recused" Y/N but they just tells them off?”
Genre: Slight angst
Word Count: 1,442
Tags:  @yuki-osaki​ @liviitehe​ @iamsoftsodonttoucheume-blog​
a/n: Thanks for the request! I’m sorry it took so long to do...
Yes, the title is akin to the "birds of a feather" saying.  I will also tell you guys that in this universe, if the League ever got caught before things blew up to as big as they've gotten in the manga, the villains would have pulled a Gentle Criminal for the reader.  You’ll see why I say that later.
This is still in the same continuity as my other LoV posts, but it can also be a different one as well.  Not that I’m planning anything for it, but I think it’s just nice to keep a similar timeline between some of my posts I guess.
Funny how I always end up running when I'm faced with important milestones. I ran when I realized my parents were gone right into the hands of people I thought were going to kill me.  And they turned out to be much better than I expected, I have to say.
My former classmate at UA had found me while I was out to get food for the League.  They were really craving pizza today and now I have to run.  I'm gonna get an earful from them later for coming back late.
They were gonna find me eventually, I should've been prepared.  I never even thought of the excuse I was going to use when they inevitably did.
A hand catches my shoulder and I almost scream, only to turn around and see Kaminari.  Damnit, I thought he hadn't seen me.  When I caught him walking the opposite way as me, I'd hoped I could get away before he realized it was me.
He smiles naturally.  "Hey, (Y/n)!  I thought I saw you walking around here!"  Before I can say anything he grips me into a tight hug.  "Gosh, we were all worried about you!  Where have you been all this time?"
I pry his grip off of me gently.  "I've just...been here, you know, living my life."
For a moment, Kaminari hesitates before he whines out an exhale.  "Agh, I can't do this.  (Y/n), they kinda sent me to...rescue you, because we had the best relationship."
I furrow my eyebrows "Rescue me?"  Should've known.  At least they didn't send Midoriya.
"Yeah, sorry about this."
Kaminari suddenly drags me by the arm into the nearest alley.  "What the hell-!?"  Soon I'm faced with two other figures, both of of them I know very well also.  Damnit, they did send Midoriya.
"Before you say anything, no one else knows we're here, it's just us," Midoriya blurts out.
"I'm surprised Todoroki isn't here," I respond lamely, sighing at the mini intervention. "It's usually the two of you acting on whims together."
"It was my idea this time," Kaminari admits as he rubs the back of his neck.  "The school's officially taking you off the roster and we at least wanted to look for you one last time."
My fist clenches and I look down.  "I didn't know I'd be so missed."
"We were very worried about you!  It's not becoming of a young hero-in-training to miss class!" Iida chops at the air.  It's nice to know he hasn't changed much.
"How did you guys even know I was here?"
"That's not important," Midoriya answers quickly and takes a step towards me.  Concern fills his face.  "(Y/n), please come back.  We don't know why you left, but we can sort it out."
I'm silent, holding his pleading gaze with my own icy stare.  "You guys said no one else knows you're here.  Keep it that way and leave.  No one else needs to know where I am or what I'm doing."  I turn to walk away.
"Are you with the League?"  Kaminari's voice sounds broken, a stark contrast from his usual upbeat, dorky tone.
I'm taken aback by how he could've known that, but I brush it off.  "That's none of your business."
He forces out a nervous laugh.  "I think I get it, you want to stay and gather intell-"
"No, I'm staying because I want to stay."  My conviction is firm.  There's no point in denying it.
Iida pushes up his glasses.  "It looks like they've brainwashed you, (Y/n)-san, this isn't like you.  You were always so quiet-"
"Yeah, but you had no idea why!"  I close my eyes and breath.  It's not worth it to blow up and tell them everything that's happened, it's in the past and I'm working on resolving it myself.  "I don't need to be a hero anymore, it won't solve my problems like I thought before."
"So you'd rather be a villain?!  Taking innocent lives?!"
"I don't do any of that!" I snarl back at him.
"But you will eventually!"
"And I'll figure it out when the time comes!"  Their faces fall.  "They may be villains, but they've helped me so much more than when I was in UA!  I feel safe with them.  They're my new family, and I'm staying with them."
"Well, that's touching."
The boys in front of me stiffen at the voice behind me.  I turn to see Shigaraki, Dabi, and Mr. Compress approaching in the darkness of the alleyway.
"We were wondering what was taking you so long, so we had to come check," the masked man haughtily explains, dropping a hand on top of my head.  My former classmates go pale at the sight.  They probably think he was going to hurt me.
"We meet again, Midoriya Izuku."  Shigaraki's cracked lips turn up into a crazed smirk and Midoriya gulps.
"UA kids all alone, huh," Dabi comments.  "What was their big plan?  To come kidnap you back to them?  They would have to do through us first."  His palm lights up with blue flames.  "I'm sure Toga would've liked to see this boy again."
"I've been dying to try my new trick on someone!"  Compress waves his hands dramatically, a few marbles appearing between his fingers.  "I've got the props all ready right here!"
"Don't hurt them," I say blankly.  I don't have much power over them, but I can at least give my opinion.  "It's not worth getting into a struggle with them now."
"(Y/n)'s right," Shigaraki sighs and buries his hands in his pockets.  "Besides, my stomach's eating itself I'm so hungry.  We can settle this another day."
The three of them start exiting and I want to follow behind them, but Kaminari catches my shoulder.  "Are you really going with them?  You chose them over us?"  His crestfallen expression tugs at a soft spot in my chest, but I've already reached a point where it doesn't sway me.
I shrug him off.  "You're lucky you're getting out of here without struggle because of me."  My voice and my glare are icy toward each of them before  I turn and follow the rest out of the alley.  "The next time we see each other, we'll be on different sides.  I hope you'll be prepared to see me again when it happens."
There's a bitter taste in my mouth as we leave the alleyway.  It's not like I feel nothing for them, they were my former classmates after all.  The regret I sometimes feel is something more akin to curiosity than anything.  If I hadn't run into the League, where would I be?  Would I be content the same way as I am now?  Am I content?  Is this the best I could be doing?
Did I make the right choice?
"Listen kid."  Dabi hangs back a little since I'm falling behind from the rest of them.  "I don't have the right to tell you what decision you should've made in your life or ask why you decided to live with a bunch of raggedy good-for-nothings like us," he looks up at the other two and leans over, "But if you wanted to walk away from all of this, you still can."
My eyes widen, and for a moment, all the memories of my time in the League come rushing back.  All the laughs we shared, the late nights they helped me get through, playing games with them, the take out nights like these.  They aren't my family, but it's the closest thing I have to something like that.  Even the thought of leaving them leaves a devastating sinking feeling in my chest.  "Never," I gasp, breath taken from me at the suggestion.
The man scans me, cocking an eyebrow.  "You'd really rather be associated with lawbreakers just because we took you in?"
My face falls.  "Is that a bad thing?"
He pauses, not having anything to say to that, and there's a trace of shock in his features.  His face relaxes and he clasps his hands behind his neck casually.  "I guess you really do fit with us, you've got issues."
I can't help but smile at his words; it's the closest I'll get to him explicitly admitting his appreciation for me.  "I don't think it's the issues, it's the broken-ness."
"No kid, you're just weird."  His large, burnt hand plops on top of my head as he sighs.  "Ah, we're gonna have to move hideouts again.  I was actually liking this place."
"The pizza here is most delicious!" Compress pipes up in agreement.
"Ugh, this is why we can't have nice things, you guys always ruin it," Shiguraki groans.  "Goodbye, delicious and crunchy thin crust pizza..."
"Oh, don't be a drama queen," Dabi rolls his eyes.
Well, regardless of if this was a correct decision, I might as well enjoy it while it lasts.  All this might be worth all the trouble I'll get into in the future.
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popculturebuffet · 3 years ago
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Amphiba: True Colors Review or FINALLY THE  FINALE
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We’re finally here all you happy people! Ten Months, 36 episodes, 20 half hours, a lot of gay subtext, a lot of bloodshed, and a lot of build up have lead us all here! One absolutely STUFFED finale: A trust is betrayed, a rebllion is had, a conquerer rises and NOTHING will ever be the same.. and yes htat’s thrown around a lot but this is one of those times where NOTHING WILL BE THE SAME. This is that kind of finale folks. 
But before I can get into all the juicy stuff you’ve been waiting for there’s a few things to discuss.. and the first is obviously the fact we had to wait three goddamn extra weeks to get here after spending all season leading up to this. 
You all know the story by now. Hell I even angirly ranted about it when it happened and rightfully so. But frankly the colossal delay is going to be such an integral and permeant part of this episode and this show’s history that not talking about it in this review would do it a diservice: So to recap: The finale was posted to air  May 1st, a weak after “The Dinner/Battle of the Bands”. I had it set in my schedule, it showed up in that month’s press release of Disney Channel Episodes, We were all ready to go with all the tight and intense build up leading up to this. 
Then the worst happened and Disney aburbtly, and with a funny face image trying to play it off as a joke annoucned via it’s animation twitter the episode would be delayed. Now in fairness to the twitter person there, they were PROBABLY trying to help massage a blow... but seriously dude, read the room next time.  Thankfully creator Matt Braly stepped in and explained it was technical delays. After what happened the next day I ASSUMED he was just trying to cover for them as it would turn out the episode was finished.. turns out, and I had to edit the review to reflect this the truth was somewhere in the middle. Edits were more discussed, likely due to the episodes very violent nature, and the episode was given a content warning. Given what happens.. I can’t blame Disney for wanting one or for thinking of editing it.. but canblamehtem for the “Things that could’ve been brought to my attention YESTERDAY’ nature of the edist and the insuing delay. 
I can also blame them for leaking the episode on ITUNES. Yeah if they were REALLY concenred abotu content then they would’ve held off longer and not brought this up five minutes before it aired, delaying the episode for many. Hell I DEFENEDED them in the original version of this, but they had MONTHS of this episode being in production to fucking say something. WHy do this five mintues before it’s finished? 
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It just smacks of laziness and overly panicy stuff. A content warning would’ve been FINE. You ahve it for racisim on Disney Plus, just put one here and call it a day. You haven’t objected to the horrifying content in the series up to this point why start NOW.  And they STILL never apologized. For any of this. For the leak, for the delay, never properly explaining the delay (Matt didn’t either.. but given how twitchy comapnies can be about what their creators say, I can’t blame him for not wanting to clarify it was a post credit’s thing till closer to airtime), just in general not giving a shit abotu the kids or adults watching this. Just because kids watch thiis dosen’t me older kids don’t have social media, and it dosen’t mean teens don’t. If you want to pretend us adults watching this don’t exist.. fine. It sucks but I can’t do anything. But do not do this shit to kids and then not go to them. And again Matt could’ve.. but it’s not his fucking job. His job is to make a show, help make sure it gets to air and be a sweeheart. YOURS is to make sure things run smoothly and when their is a hickup,get your house in order. 
Matt shoudln’t of HAD to beg people not to watch it. Various va’s for the show shoudln’t of HAD to record funny messages.. it was appricated but it’s not thier job to prevent this from spreading. It’s yours. It’s yours to open your damn eyes and see adults and older teens watch this stuff too and to head that shit off. This incident is going to stick in my craw for god knows how long and ALMOST convinced me not to cover Owl House weekly (I still woud’ve likely done a review on each half of the season). I ended up renegeing on that and will be starting regular coverage of that in June and continuing coverage of this show whenever it returns.. but it was close. 
And it’s ultimately YOU GUYS that kept me hanging in there. It was thanks to a Disney show this blog exists in the first place, and contiunes to get the bulk of it’s viewers. It’s how I got my patreon, biggest fan and bfinacial backer Kev. I’ts why I can do what I love, talking about and analyzing stuff I enjoy and ocasionally loathe. You guys came back week after week for my ducktales reviews and stayed for Amphibia. I”m sure i’ll get even more for Owl House. It’s thanks to all of you I can keep going despite the hardships, the lack of patreons, the long nights, the weird sleep schedules. I wouldn’t of made it through 20 weeks of awesome tv without you. So for you, and for myself, i’ll hang in there but I expect better Disney. And i’m damn well gonna get it. So join me under the cut as the world turns upside down.. and there are a LOT of spoilers. Seriously if you want to wait for the tv airing do not go under the cut
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So we open with a flashback to 8 months ago, the day all this began: Marcy was working in the library on her cram classes, getting texts from both Sasha, who was excited about Anne’s birthday, and her own father who wants her to come home right away as there’s something important they need to discuss. 
But before she can a book about the strange and what not naturally slips out and Mar-Mar can’t help but thumb through it.. and as you were no doubt dreading.. finds the box which is said in a large tv friendly caption to lead to other worlds. 
Naturally Marcie is intrigued and snaps a pick and heads home... and we cut to the END of that conversation as she tearfully runs out of the house , refusing to accept what they’ve told her and her dad coming off hella unsympathetic with his overly harsh tone, especially since we DO find out what he told her... and it’s a lot to put on her and a lot to just say “accept because I helped make you for all of two unsatisfying minutes. “ 
So while running away she passes the box.. and sets the events from both the show’s opening and the flashback from the last finale in motion. Marcy sent them here on purpose.
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Yeah needless to say I DIDN’T see this coming. And it seems obvious in hindsight: Marcy being the one most desperate to keep thier friendship together, as we’ll see at it’s worst through this episode, her barely mentioning going home, and most tellingly the only things she talks about from earth were Anne, Sasha and her dorky intrests. All the things closest to the heart and that she’s most likely to make out with.. but while Anne brings up earth stuff every so often even after getting more screen time in Season 2b... Marcy NEVER talks about that kind of stuff. She has her girlfriends and a real life fantasy novel right here... but she DOSEN’T miss her parents or earth itself. And given her life was already shown to be as an outcast with only two people carring about her, three with her mom now we know, who never REALLY fit in and whose on friends very clearly didn’t share her intrests.. it probably made it all the more tempting: a real adventure, an escape from her problems, and a way to start over: become who she always PLAYED and not who she was. Everything just.. snaps into place with this revelation and makes Marcy an all the more heartbreaking character... even more so soon enough when we find out what her overall plan was. 
But that’s half an episode away: for now our party returns on Joe to Newtopia.. though clumsly. Marcy admits that they probably can’t fit more people on him. But with this our heroes are ready to finish this story and with a plan since obviously they can’t just walk into town with two wanted crminals: Marcy will present the box and THEN sasha and grime, who will cloak themselves to avoid attracting attentions, with literal cloaks Marcy hasn’t made a cloaking device yet, so hopefully they’ll get a pardon. 
Inside Sprig and Anne talk, with Sprig admitnig he’s sad this is the last adventure.. but Anne has hope. After all they have a way home now and that portal goes both ways. She can hop back any time and vice versa. This sin’t goodbye.. it’s just goodbye for now. And i’ts something I genuinely didn’t think of.. and not just because Andrias’ shady actions and Sasha and Grime’s machinations meant this was NEVER going to end well. 
Speaking of Sasha and Grime’s machinations those come to a head: As our heroes enter the castle, greeted by Lady Olivia, and we get our typical end of the RPG speech from the “Good” king.... Sasha swipes the box and Grime uses the hammer to knock everyone off ballance. The coup the two have been cooking up has come to pass. 
Anne and Marcy’s reactions.. are telling: Anne is utterly pissed at the betryal and done with Sasha and Marcy is begging both sides to stop as this was not how it was supposed to end. Sasha tries to use a box as a baranging chip, and plans to destroy it if Andrias dosen’t surrender despite destroying her way home. Given it’s implied her home life isn’t great either and she gets to rule an empire instead of a school, it’s easy to see why. 
Grime stops him from calling her bluff though by wacking him in the shins and then hodling him at hammer point to get the military of Newtopia to stand down while his covert Toad agents reveal themselves and runamuck. Grime has won. 
Anne meanwhile is livid, with Sasha not quite getting why MAYBE Anne would once again feel betrayed that once again Sasha is trying to do everything her way and once again lied to her and harmed innocent people. Anne breaks off their friendship which deeply uspets Marcy.. who weirldy. ISN’T trying to talk Sasha out of this. After all she gets what she wanted anyway. She IS upset when Sasha tries to send them home for defiance.. but the box dosen’t work for her and she simply has the guards escort our heroes and Olivia out till she can figure this out. 
Naturally though Anne, being pissed, heartbroken and pissed, and yes that was indeed intentional, HEADBUTTS the nearest guard and breaks them out, with the planatrs starting to fight back. Their still outnumbered.. but help arrives 
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Or rather the Amphibia equilvent as both wolverines are busy with prep for the Hellfire Gala. Yes it’s General Yunan, who Lady Olivia cuts off probably not for the first time. Your lucky that’s one of her turn on’s lady.
So our heroes sneak out and head to Sals, while the Toads wreck up the town. Marcy... is of course desperate to fix things, but figures it’s easy. All they have to do is free the king, stop the rest of the army from arriving, their an hour away, and cementing grime’s foothold, get her girlfriends to reconcile and fix the inherent power imbalance so a rebellion doesn’t’ happen again. 
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But Anne rouses them: They may be a goofus, a quick witted kid, an out of touch old man, a literal baby, am etaphorical baby, and a nerd.. but their a BADASS Goofus, kid, old man, babies and nerd... and two other ladies the toads actually know and respect. They’ve fought worse: Canibals, princess bride references, theater bandits, chicken elder gods, Poly’s addiction to angry mobs and paste pot pete and come back stronger each time. They can do this. They might only be 8 strangers, but together they can fuck up this shit. or to have a previously mentioned buddy of mine sum it up
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So with that it’s time to split up gang: Marcy, Hop Pop and Olivia will go free the king using Hop Pop’s acting skills...which actually works despite Olvia’s doubts. Polly, Yunan and Frobo will put the hammer down and give them hell, taking out the toads in the city and drawing all of them away from the gate where Spriganne will trigger it thus saving the day. 
Meanwhile Sasha is feeling discontent. She got everything she wanted.. but she didn’t think about what to DO with all that power. At home she could do all sorts of things ruling a school but now she’s lost one of the loves of her life. Without Anne and Marcy i’ts just empty. Even Grime’s utterly heartfelt gift of an emerald sword, he knew she always wanted to duel wield that has a heron on it, a sign of how they met and a truly sweet gesture can’t cheer her up. So Grime suggests redecorating and the first thing to go is a sappy mural of Andrias and his subjects. What they find UNDER it though is horrifying.. and i’ts surprisingly not a bunch of spiders like you’d expect.. but a mural of Andrius as some sort of horrible king with an army of robot frogs like Frobo, with a LOT of frog, toad and newt skeletons piled up. Sasha and Grime are glad they dodged that bullet.. only to find Anne scaling the tower with Sprig, the two naturally going to stop them.
 The two try and turn the wheel, but can’t as there’s a doorstop... one they DEFINTELY saw earlier when looking out the window of Sal’s.
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Regardless they send Polly for that.. and the rematch begins. Sasha TRIES talking to Anne.. but given she stabbed her in the back AGAIN for incredbly petty reasons, that’s not going to work and the two get one hell of a fight. Beautifully animated and rife with emotion as the two clash with Sasha DESPERATLY trying to get Anne to stop for a second and listen and Anne rightly refusing, while we watching know our hero winning will spell DOOM for this world despite her trying to do the right thing. Anna and Brenda’s acting here is just TOP notch. In any other episode this would be the best part of it.. but we’re only getting warmed up.
While they fight, we get a surprising and awesome bout I did not see coming: Sprig Vs Grime. And it gives me Spider-Man vs Kingpin vibes really: A rotund but still far more powerful opponent versus a smaller but quicker one. And that’s how even more shockingly, Sprig comes out the WINNER. While Grime has the hammer and more strength and skill... Sprig has speed and thus gets Grime to whack himself with it. Granted he can’t use the thing and comically spins around afterword.. but it proves Grime’s racist thoughts about frogs wrong and leaves Anne free to turn the wheel once she beats Sasha. The invasion is thwarted.
But naturally given the ooky spooky mural and the other hints of ominous shit like the watcher with a thousand eyes, this isn’t the end. Back at the throne room, with Sasha and Grime as prisoners Anne gives Andrias the box despite sasha begging her not to. But rather than send her home right away.. he has a history lesson for her first. And nothing good ever starts with someone delaying helping you to give a sinister history lesson let me tell you.
We find out the while truth: Amphibia was once a technological empire powered by the box, and prosperity SEEMINGLY reigned, and Andrias, much like our heroines, had two close friends, a toad and a frog. But one day they betrayed him, abandoning him and seemingly stealing the box , leaving his mechanical marvels powerless and Andrias bitter and angry. Hence the whole revenge ploy. 
In an unsurprising and invincible-esque twist, he reveals his ancestors were not explorers but CONQUERERS and he intends to finish their work, placing the box on a pedestal that turns his castle into a flying fortress glowing blue. It only gets worse from there: the castle’s awakening also activates factories around Amphibia similar to the one we saw back in “Fort in the Road” that gave us Frobo and it turns out their dark purpose.. is to create armies of unstoppable soldiers to secure his dominon.... and spread it to the other worlds. The reason he didn’t send the girls home is he figures correctly Anne and the others will try and stop him from TAKING it. 
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So yeah Anne’s reaction is very naturally...
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And despite being outgunned, outmanned, outnumbered and outplanned she plans to make an all out stand. She realizes that her own fight with Sasha only allowed something FAR WORSE to take hold. She’s not WRONG for fighting her, Sasha was being a shithead taking over and did so for flimsy and selfish reasons and she had no reason to listen to her.. but had she at least thought over giving him the box and not simply given it to him to spite her none of this would be happening. So she and the plantars get ready for round 2, with Sasha having her back this time, and Grime having Sasha’s. It’s a really sweet moment, showing Sasha has realized just how much her own greedy and controlling ambitions have cost her and that she’s brought about something far worse thorugh them, and is ready to make amends and Grime as always ready to stand by the only true family he has. 
But before the carnage can begin.. Marcy stops them... and then tearfully turns to Andrias “This wasn’t our deal!”. Andrias, now not having to play nice, dosen’t care and cruelly points out of course he did: He would’ve said whatever it took to get her to fill the box and she did it. He also hints at Marcy’s dark secret, with both girls wondering what the hell he’s on about.. but clearly starting to piece it together, with Andrias cruelly toying with Marcy to tell them before he does.. and barely gives her any time before going ahead with it anyway, knowing she’d be unable to. And with this we get the best line of the episode and Keith david’s best delivery.. and given he makes a fucking seven course meal of the entire second act, yeah that’s a high bar.
"Did it ever occur to you — Anne, Sasha — that one of you knew more than she was letting on? That one of you might've gotten you stranded in Amphibia... on purpose?"
The line itself hits like a sledgehammer. We knew for the full episode she did this on purpose.. but we also knew at some point it was clearly going to come out and hurt them both.. and to see someone Marcy clearly saw as a better replacement dad, someone she thought cared about her and was offering her her dreams for no gain on his end cruelly tell them clearly for his own amusment as he dosen’t remotely see them as a threat.. it’s utterly chilling as it is heartbreakiing and horrifying. 
Naturally Anne and Sasha are upset, Sasha a bit baffled and Anne just utterly broken by this: She’d already been betrayed TWICE by the other love of her life.. now MARCY had betrayed her.. and WORSE? 
And it only gets worse as Marcy heartbreakingly reveals her motivation and what this was really all about: Her dad announced he got a new job and they were moving a state away.. and like I said he’s a prick. Not for moving, that happens and it sucks but for having no freaking empathy about it. Maybe if he took a parenting class earth wouldn’t be on the cusp of a robot invasion. Marcy was about to loose her girls and was desperate.... so naturally Andrias claimed to simply want to take them all with him on his journeys, obviously leading out the conquest and likely genocide part, so they could go on and on FOREVER. And this whole thing gave Anne the plantars so it’s not all bad right? Right? But it’s clear she’s trying to desperatly lie to herself this was all okay as she’s been doing ever since she started this all 8 months ago and Anne pointing out she misses her family, something Marcy never considered given her own reasons for leaving and how Sasha likely dosen’t have a happy family life herself. 
This.. this is Haley Tju’s finest hour. She’s done good voice work before, especially in this series but here, with Marcy’s anguish, desperation and guilt all leaking out as she tries to get her girlfriend not to turn away from her. it’s all just amazing heartbreaking stuff and I salute her and the animation does her fine acting a service and shows every bit of pain in the poor girls face. 
Anne naturally does turn away a bit and Marcy cries.. but Anne quickly recovers... while she obviously isn’t entirely ready to forgive Marcy JUST yet, it’s clear she wasn’t thinking straight and did all of this out of desperation... and that the hulking dickbag who betrayed them all and is gloating about all of this manipulated her, preying on her desperation and anguish to finish his plan.  Marcy fucked up big time, no question.. but ANDRIAS is the true monster here, and if he’s not stopped this world she’s grown to love and the one she left behind will BURN. Anne may be many things: impulsive, kinda weird, easy to anger.. but she is over all that a HERO. And there’s a villian to stop
Andrias, while not seeing them as remotely a threat, does admit this will probably be fun and the fight begins, with our heroes, including Marcy, easily besting the Obsdian Swarm.. as i’m calling them now. It’s a cools equence.. but ultimately futile. Andrias is FAR more powerful than he’s let on with the box. And shows it off by destroying toad tower before coming at them with a fire sowrd, easily swatting them aside like flies. They try their best to fight back but it’s not much use, and Andrias NEARLY crushes polly to death under his fist. Yes a fucking child. What a dick. 
Frobo saves him... and sadly this is the end for our new friend as Andrias is mildly amused that one of his creations glitched.. then smashes him into robotic paste. Polly rightfully calls him a monster and his response is as chilling as it is wonderfully dickish: “Don’t worry, your next”. 
Thankfully though she got out of the way.. because she has LEGS now. It’s also why I keep saying 8 months, though it’s likely more like 9 given it took a month to get to newtopia: 
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The prophecy has come true! And while she stumbles for a second Polly quickly proves she can really move, she has an attitude and she’s the fastest thing alive by grabbing the box seemingly winning.. except Andrias has sprig in his fist and is going to crush or drop him ulness she stops. And despite Sprig BEGGING his sister to let him go for the sake of everyone else, like any good hero she naturally puts the box back. 
Anne begs for him to let Sprig go since he got what he wanted and he’s her best friend in this or any world... but all this does is insprie Andrias to DROP HIM OUT A WINDOW, bitter over his own past and eager to torture her some more. This really shows off who Andrias REALLY is now the mask is off; a sadistic tyrannical bully who relishes in making his victims really squirm, revels in malevolence and is just so damn gleeful about it: Not to say BIll Cipher levels more of a cold, cruel enjoyment of things. 
As I said earlier Keith David makes a motherfucking Seven Course Meal out of the second half of this episode, utterly stealing the show now he can play Andrias as he truly is: not skulng in the shadows with ominus hints he’s evil or pretending to be nice, but instead as a sadistic brute who delights in suffering and wants nothing less than everything under his boothill. in short he’s an AWESOME antagonist and while Keith David has played TREMENDOUS villains before, this one will easily be his best if the writing holds. Andrias is Keith David at his fucking best and proves the Disney legend has EVEYRTHING left in the tank even as he approaches 70′s. Jesus I fucking love this man. 
So this causes anne to retreat into herself, leaving us in a black void as Anne remembers all the good times.. and goes MOTHERFUCKING SUPER SAYIAN. Well more accurately super sayian god super sayian, or blueper sayian if you will, but still i’ts a n utterly striking sequence and a clear direct shout out with Anne getting her powers the same way Goku did: loosing someone to an utterly cruel bastard. Same with Gohan’s upgrade to super sayian 2. It’s just a truly striking sequence as she powers up in a FULL rage, DEMANDNIG he give him back. 
Andrais is stunned, clearly knowing this was something she was capable of but thought she could no longer do as the box shoudlv’e drained her of the ablility, while Hop Pop and Grime wonder if this is a human thing. 
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So Anne WAILS on the fucker, easily besting a shocked andrias despite his best attempts.. but she tires out and he swats her aside, gleefully noting she dosen’t know how to control it. Sprig turns out to be okay though. Marcy went and saved him while Anne was rippig Andrias asunder.. and then activates the box. Sasha and Grime hold him off while Anne makes a run for it with the plantars while Andrias gives out your standard villian big no. Anne and Fam make it... but Marcy is taking a sec.. and that second gets her GUTTED. Not an exageration or me being a smart ass like usual.. Andrias RAN HER THROUGH WITH HIS SWORD. 
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His only response is “Look what you made me too and Anne and crew are warped away, unable to save her. 
So we end with our heroes landing somewhere and Sprig wondering where they are... where they are is on the top of a car on a busy Los Angeles Freeway... and in front of two very weirded out humans. Anne is home. 
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So now for the part that wasn’t in the original release apparently: The teaser.. aka THE MOTHERFUCKING SEASON 3 OPENING. 
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Hell. Yes. Just a few quick personal notes before we hit the wrap up: I love how the season will be on earth, a nice change of pace, how the Boonchuy’s have very clearly warmly welcomed the plantars, the expanded cast at the title card, and how Disney just let them go ALL out for this one. They’ve clearly stopped being cheap assholes when it comes to letting intro’s change or at the very least got this was the very end of the series and thus important enough to gussie up. But yes the end is nigh.. and probably not till late this year if this year AT ALL And I will return for it. Well return to doing this show anyway, i’m not going anywhere. They’ll have to pry this blog from my cold dead hands. 
Final Thoughts:
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This episode is the series best so far. My only honest complaint is the Toad Invasion comes and goes really quickly and I question why it was crammed into half the episode. Don’t get me wrong, Andrias’ rise needed the full 10 minutes, but I question why we dind’t get an episode before this settingit up and THEN have it happen over half an episode, epsecially since we spent an entire episode on getting the other toad barons involved only for ONE of them to show up for all of five minutes. 
Otherwise though? Yeah no notes. The cast is at the top of their damn game, with Brenda Song, Hailey Tju and Keith Motherfucking David as the standouts, the animatoin is likewise, and it pays off a thing or two you wouldn’t expect like the acting episode. This is a truly outstanding finale, one that has now joined other all time faviorite season finales such as “You’re In Control”, “Reunited”, “The Crossroads of Destiny”, and “Moonvasion”. I will be watching this again when it comes to Disney Plus. Masterful stuff.
As for the season as a whole.. this was a great season. While it did start a bit rocky with the road trip arc, which I’m still not a huge fan of as I feel it mostly wasted an awesome idea of them going on a world spanning roadtrip with some fairly weak episodes, with the exception of standouts “Truckstop Polly” and “Wax Museum”. 
But once we got to Netwopia it got better, with better spotlight episodes, the pacing picking up and Marcy joining our merry crew. And it hit it’s peak with the second half of the season: the return to wartwood effortlessly combined slice of life with the compelling temple episodes. It was also a nice break before the utter hell that arrived in the finale, but still nicely lead up to said finale.  This season may of STARTED bumpy but it finished at it’s highest point and with one epic finale to go it’s only going to get better from here. 
As for this blog the same holds true: Review wise next week i’ll be taking a break from normal reviews to do a week’s worth of Goofy based content in time for his birthday, from shorts, to goof troop, to hosue of mouse, to an obscure special, all leading up to the Disney Classic A Goofy Movie. So stick around.
And if that dosen’t do it for you I have an ongoing retrospective on the story arcs of ducktales season 2, i’m nearing the end of one on Scott Pilgrim and in the middle of one of The Life and Times of Scrogoe McDuck. and if you prefer weekly reviews, as I mentioned earlier offhandidly i’ll be covering the Owl House! LIke Amphibia i’m starting with Season 2, but just like with this show i’m excited as all hell and hope you’ll join me. And if you need even more I have a patreon, patreon.com/popculturebuffet, where I have exclusive reviews if you choose to back me as well as exciting stretch goals, one of which down the line is reviewing season one of this very show. So join it and if not that’s okay too, either way.. it’s been a pleasure. 
34 notes · View notes
httpjeon · 5 years ago
Text
❝ blacklisted ❞ kth&jjk ― m.
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― summary:
after departing from your dom, you’re assigned to two incredibly powerful men.
taehyung/reader/jungkook | dom/sub!au, CEO!taekook | angst, fluff, smut | 21.4k ↬ content warnings: dom/sub themes, pet names, sir!kink, daddy!kink, threesome, mxm scenes, subspace, praise kink, dirty talk, cunnilingus, pussy slapping, orgasm denial, begging, humiliation, safewords, blowjobs, deepthroating/face-fucking, creampie, intense orgasms(?), multiple orgasms, cum eating, cum sharing, arguments, insecurities, manipulation, reader is a bit impulsive, derogatory language, sexual face-slapping, punishments, dumbification, overstimulation, forced orgasms, aftercare, crying, 69ing, face-sitting, sensitivity kink(?), double penetration
a/n: this is from a fanfic title ask game!
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Eighteen was the coveted age. At that age, you are no longer a child and were to begin a new life in the society as you'd yearned for since being a child.
You awoke on the day of your birthday, filled to the brim with anticipation.
The first place you needed to go with the Role-Assignment Institute, a big building in Seoul you'd only had the pleasure of looking at until today.
It was almost intimidating, walking in. You'd arrived early in the day but there were still so many people packed into the waiting room. For some reason, the nerves only kicked in after you signed in — receiving a number that would be called when it was your turn.
112. That was your number. You kept looking at it, anxiously worrying that you'd read it wrong. Your leg bounced as you kept repeating the number in your head.
It felt like hours before a woman dressed in blue scrubs waltzed in yelling, "Number 112!"
Your knees felt weak as you stood up, handing the number slip to the nurse. She nodded, leading you down a long corridor that reminded you of a hospital. The fluorescent lights bounced off the white walls, causing a glare that made you squint.
"The doctor will be in, in just a moment," The nurse said, standing on her tippy-toes to pull out a clipboard with paper and a pen attached. "In the meantime, please fill out all the information needed on these,"
You sat on the exam table, the crinkling sanitary paper making you cringe at how loud it was. Using your lap as a table, you began looking over the forms. There was a form for basic information; like your name, age, height, and weight along with your social security number. After filling out everything, you moved onto the waiver that gave them permission to test you to find your Assignment. Though it was a safe and very simple procedure, it was still required.
Finally finished, you placed the clipboard to the side and waited, eyes on the door as if urging the doctor to enter.
The door loudly clicked open, a tall man in a white lab coat entered with a beaming smile. He greeted you, taking a seat on a rolling stool in front of the computer — clicking and typing for a moment before turning to you.
"I'm Dr. Kim," He held his hand out for you to shake. "Have you finished filling out the forms?"
"Oh yeah," You handed the clipboard over into his waiting hand.
"Miss _____..." He read your name, eyes scanning the paper for additional information. "Alright, I'll put this in the system, it'll be just a second."
The room was filled with the clicking of the keyboard and you absentmindedly swung your feet on the exam table. Dr. Kim sighed, rolling his chair towards the back of the room to pull out a needle and alcohol wipes.
"Alright, so you know how this works right?" He asked, holding your arm with one hand as he wiped the alcohol over the bend of your elbow.
"You take my blood and test it," You answered swiftly, wincing as he tied a band around your upper arm. The blood cut off, making the rest of your arm feel numb.
"That's right," Dr. Kim smiled, uncapping the needle.
Unable to watch, you closed your eyes and looked away. Several long seconds, a quick pinch, the application of the band-aid and it was over.
The doctor rolled back over to the computer, opening up a cylindrical machine which he popped the vial of your blood into.
"It'll just be a second before the results pop up," He told you as the machine began making a loud vibrating sound.
Two painstakingly long minutes passed before the noise stopped. He made a humming noise, clicking on the computer before turning back to you.
"Well, congratulations," He smiled, standing up to retrieve some papers out of a cabinet behind you. "You're a submissive!"
"Oh cool," You gasped, feeling relief wash over you at his reveal.
"Now, on to the least fun part," He pulled out a small machine that contained a long pen like tool. "This will imprint your status into you skin similar to a tattoo — without the actual tattooing part. It holds information in it, it need only be scanned."
You'd seen the imprints before — your mom and dad both had one. They were a way of identifying if someone was of age among other things.
The branding itself didn't hurt, it was a hot flash of pain but it dissolved within a second. Once he was done the letters 'S-U-B' were inked against your skin. Running your fingers over it, you could feel it was slightly raised.
"These hold information on where to go from here including picking a good matching agency,” He held out the papers. “There's a list on the second page," He flipped it for you.
"W-Who do you recommend?" You asked, realizing you never quite researched the various companies.
"Well," He pulled out a pen. "There are three top companies all located in Seoul that are partnered with this Assignment Institute pecifically. T&J Matching Company, MinHope Matching Agency, and the Kim Namjoon Matching Firm. For you, I'd recommend MinHope — they work very closely with their clients and they're the least intimidating out of them!"
"I'll go with MinHope then!" You smiled, watching as the doctor circled the one you chose.
It took just a few more minutes of Dr. Kim filling in information for you — sending a referral from him to your chosen company.
"Alright," He stood up, holding a little envelope with his signature on the front. "This has all the information you need going forward. Information on sub-to-dom matching and various important things to know, you can look over it when you get a chance."
"Thank you so much," you grinned, tucking it away in your purse.
You bid goodbye to the doctor, stopping by the front desk on your way out to give your payment for the procedure.
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Being home filled you with relief, you instantly crashed onto the couch with a big sigh. Your feet hurt from walking and your back hurt from that exam table you sat on for an hour and a half.
Lifting your arm up, you gazed at the little black letters inked into your skin.
"Oh! I should call Mom!" You whispered to yourself, pulling out your phone.
Hearing her happily blabbing on about how happy and proud of you she was had you grinning from ear to ear. You could hear her relay every important detail to your dad, who also gave his congratulations. The conversation fizzled off into telling each other how your days had been going since you'd last seen each other. About an hour into the call, your phone began beeping obnoxiously in your ear.
"I have to go, Mom, I have another call incoming," You told her. "I'll talk to you later, yeah. Love you!"
You hurriedly answered the incoming call, effectively ending the call with your mother.
"Hello?" You asked.
"Good evening, this is Joy with MinHope Matching Agency," Your heart sped up. "We received a referral from Dr. Kim. Would you like to set up your appointment?"
"Yes please!" You smiled, sitting up properly. "When is the soonest I can be seen?"
"Well..." You held your breath and you could hear faint clicking of a computer. "There's an appointment opening with Mr. Jung at 10:15 in the morning. Does that work?"
"That's perfect!" You exclaimed.
Bidding your goodbyes to the woman, you flopped back onto the couch, filled to the brim with so much excitement you weren't sure you'd be able to sleep through the night.
The morning of your appointment came earlier than you expected. You'd had trouble sleeping so you felt a little drowsy getting to the Agency.
"Um hi, I'm ____ I have a 10:15 with Mr. Jung," You said to the lady sitting behind the reception desk. On the wall was a sign that said MinHope Matching Agency, with a glowing white back light. She clicked on her computer for a second before pulling out a badge that said "Visitor".
"Go to floor 8," The lady said. "You can speak to Joy up there at the service desk and she'll tell you where to go,"
You were surprised by the cold attitude of the woman and hurriedly scurried to the elevator. You could feel her eyes on you as you waited for the doors to open. Glancing behind you, you winced when you met her piercing gaze.
"Boy," You gasped, leaning against the back of the elevator once you got in. "What was her problem?"
You watched the numbers go up as you ascended the floor before stopping on the 8th. When you stepped out, you were met with a few faces, waiting to get in as well.
"Excuse me," you breathed, bypassing them easily.
You spotted the large desk, wandering over to it and waited for Joy, as you figured, to finish speaking with someone else.
"Hello!" She beamed."Are you here for an appointment?"
"Um yes," You answered. "10:15 for Mr. Jung."
"Oh right, Miss ____!" She beamed, pulling out a scanning gun. "Please show me your arm,"
With a click of the gun, your sub tattoo was scanned.
"Okay," She stood up. "If you'll follow me, I'll take you to Mr. Jung's office,"
Her heels clicked on the linoleum floors as you walked behind her through a hallway. Doors were lined up on both sides, some appeared to be conference rooms and other just normal offices. She stopped in front of a large wooden door with a plaque that read Jung Hoseok, CEO.
"Just go on in and he'll start your consultation," Joy bowed before pivoting on her heel and going back the way she came.
Walking into a CEO's office seemed quite daunting. So you timidly gaze three knocks, letting him know you were there before opening the door.
"Come in, come in!" He beamed, a bright heart-shaped smile as he opened the door even more for you.
He was dressed in a nice suit with his hair slicked back. He was really good looking. You followed his urging and took a seat in front of his desk, in a comfortable leather chair.
"I see Joy scanned you for me, that's great," He smiled. "Sometimes she forgets to do that."
He clicked on his computer for several long minutes, typing and reading over whatever came on the screen. He was silent for several minutes, giving you an excellent chance to look at him. His sleeves hid where his brand was so you were unable to see what he was. You wondered if he was matched or not. He was good looking and certainly above the age of 18 but that didn't really mean anything.
"And there we have it!" He grinned, pivoting his screen to show you what was on it.
On the screen was a picture of you, there was a picture of a man who had Lee Daehoon (DOM) underneath.
"This is my match?" You asked, scooting closer to look at him. "He's...handsome,"
"I'm glad you approve!" Hoseok grinned, turning his screen back around to face himself.
"Can I ask...how you make the matches like that?" You asked, watching him click on his computer again.
"Well, we simply scan your imprint and it reveals details about you along with your DNA information which allows up to match you with a Dominant who is basically most compatible! Of course, there are several possible matches but it goes with the best one currently in the system," He easily explained, turning his chair around to grab some papers from his printer.
"That's interesting..." You mumbled, glancing down at your tattoo mesmerized by just how much information could be extracted from it.
"Alright, your first meeting with Mr. Lee is set up, there should be an email for you with the information."
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You honestly never thought you'd be in that leather chair again with Jung Hoseok staring blankly at his computer screen searching for a good match. But unfortunately, fate likes to be cruel and ruin good things.
Lee Daehoon...what a jerk.
"I'm sorry about this," Hoseok suddenly said, making you look up. He was already staring at you with indiscernible pity. "I know it's hard when a relationship doesn't work. A lot of people just expect it to and they get disappointed. Of course, sometimes it does work! A lot of the time!" He quickly tried to save what he'd said.
"It's alright," You smiled. "It happens, I know that. I'm just kind of annoyed I wasted 3 years with that jerk..."
Hoseok smiled. "I understand—" He suddenly gasped, sitting up straighter and leaning his face closer to the screen.
"That's bad for your eyes," You joked.
"I don't believe it..." He mumbled.
"What is it?" His behavior had your anxiety piquing.
"Here, take a look," He spun his monitor around for you to see.
You saw your face, as expected, but instead of just one line and one picture there were two. Two photos of men sat beneath yours, showing a match to both of them while they were connected by their own line.
Kim Taehyung (DOM) and Jeon Jungkook (DOM).
"Two Doms?" You leaned closer to the screen in surprise. "How is that possible?"
"Well," Hoseok's brows were furrowed as he turned the screen around to see for himself once again. "It's certainly uncommon but..." He shook his head. "I've never personally seen it."
"D-Does it explain anything? Who are they? How could this even work?" You bombarded the poor man with questions.
"Well actually...I know both of them," He confessed. "We're friends, in fact."
"Seriously? Isn't that too much of a coincidence?" You gasped.
He shrugged. "They're both the CEOs of T&J Matching Company."
Your brain short-circuited at those words. "Pardon?"
"They've been together for a while, I didn't think they'd ever..." He broke off, humming to himself. It took him a second before he sobered up. "No matter! I've got your papers coming out now."
You watched as the papers came out of the printer, waiting for him to grab them. Smiling, he tucked them into a manila company envelope and handed it over to you.
"There's an email waiting for you, you know how this goes," He smiled, escorting you out of his office all the way to the elevator. "By the way...I don't think I ever gave you this but," He pulled out a little white card. "This is my business card if you ever need me."
You bid him goodbye before the elevator doors could close. Just before they did, you caught his smile dropping, replaced with a firm grimace.
What was that about?
On your way home, you read the email that gave the date and location of your first three dates with Taehyung and Jungkook. It also briefly explained the steps to take after the three dates — such as agreeing to match, declining the matching, and requesting more pre-match dates.
The first date was tomorrow at 12:30 — a lunch date.
You spent the rest of the evening planning out a outfit — not sure what style to go with. Then you did lengthy skincare and took a nice, long, hot bath.
Finally, by the time you were in bed, you decided to google the names of your potential matches. You were nearly blinded by how attractive they both were. Clicking on Taehyung's Wikipedia page, you began to read all about him.
'He has publicly been in a relationship with Dominant Jeon Jungkook, since before the creation of their company.' It read.
You were puzzled, having never heard of two Doms being together.
Googling more about their relationship, you saw articles trashing such a relationship and others providing information and statistics on the commonalty of it.
You locked your phone, staring blankly at the wall as your heart beat loudly in your chest.
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You entered the restaurant, surprised to learn such a high-class place was your destination. It was a 5-star eatery and you felt immediately out of place when you walked in. Everyone was dressed up and wearing beautiful jewelry while you were wearing a simple summer dress.
"Hello? Do you have a reservation?" The hostess asked, face as blank as her voice.
"Um...I'm here for the MinHope Agency Reservation?" You replied, watching as she looked over something in front of her.
"Right, your dates have arrived," As she rounded the podium, you saw her tattoo on her arm that read DOM. No wonder she was so intimidating.
Your table was located in the far corner of the restaurant, away from everyone else. As you walked up to the table, you noticed the two men sitting there.
"Hello gentlemen," The hostess smiled. "Here's your date."
Both sets of eyes were upon you and as the woman walked away, you felt like you'd just been thrown the feral wolves while covered in meat.
"H-Hi I'm _____," You greeted, smiling sheepishly.
"I'm Taehyung," He had a boxy smile, standing up to pull your chair out for you.
"Thank you, Taehyung," You whispered, sitting down before he pushed you in.
Your eyes drifted to the other man, his arms crossed over his chest. His eyes were doe-like but they were ice cold as they pierced into you.
"U-Uh this is Jungkook!" Taehyung hurriedly introduced his companion. "He's um...shy?"
It sounded more like a question but you managed to smile anyway. You hoped it wasn't too obviously fake.
You noticed quickly they were both wearing suits. Taehyung's was gray while Jungkook's was black. They both wore rings and expensive-looking watches.
They were definitely CEOs.
"Let's order some appetizers!" Taehyung said, handing you a menu. "What would you like?"
You gazed over the menu, eye twitching at the prices listed beside the items.
"Th-This is too expensive..." You whispered, more to yourself. "I-I can't afford any of this..."
Jungkook scoffed, sitting forward to look over his own menu. "Could have seen that coming..."
"It's alright ____, the Agency will take care of the check!" Taehyung said, easing your apprehension.
"Oh really?" You asked.
When you had been on dates with Daehoon, it had been paid by you and him. Then again, they weren't nearly as lavish as these dates. Perhaps it just depended on the class of people.
"Um...I-I'm not sure what to choose," You squeaked out, feeling your face flush as you felt flustered by the way the date was going. You winced when Jungkook scoffed again.
"It's alright, we'll order something simple. Do you like stuffed mushrooms?" Taehyung asked, peeking at you over your menu.
Lowering it, you smiled and nodded. "I don't mind them!"
"Alright!" Taehyung waved his hand in the air and a waitress came over in a hurry. "We'll have the stuffed mushrooms!"
"Coming right up," She beamed, writing it down on a notepad before vanishing into another room across the way.
You looked at your menu once again, towards what they had ordered; mushrooms stuffed with Pecorino Romano, garlic, and breadcrumbs — ₩112,000. You nearly choked at the price tag but managed to keep it under wraps.
"Have you picked your meal?" Taehyung asked.
Before you could answer, Jungkook spoke up. "I'll have the roasted duck with the orange-bourbon glaze."
"O-Oh that sounds yummy," Taehyung patted Jungkook's shoulder, turning his eyes back to you. "You?"
"Doubt she can even read the damn menu," You winced at the insult, feeling your eyes sting slightly in embarrassment but fought it back.
Looking at the menu again, you quickly decided, "Spicy Thai basil chicken." You forced yourself to ignore the ₩140,000 glaring at you. It was going to be the most expensive food you ever ate.
"Awesome," He grinned and you missed the way he kicked Jungkook under the table, making the younger wince.
You and Taehyung engaged in idle small-talk about your likes and dislikes as you waited for the waitress to return. He would occasionally force Jungkook into it, bringing up his boyfriend's own preferences.
When the waitress returned, Taehyung listed all the meals you ordered. His own had made you balk; stuffed lamb breast with lemon, ricotta, and oregano. You didn't get a chance to look at that price tag before the menus were taken from you but you could only imagine how expensive it was.
Taehyung and Jungkook dissolved into soft chatter about work and you did your best not to listen in, instead gazing around the room to watch the people around you. It was the most awkward you'd felt all evening.
"Here you are; your meals!" A steaming plate of chicken was placed before you and you felt your stomach grumble.
"Looks delicious!" Taehyung groaned, quickly stuffing his mouth with his lamb breast.
Following his lead, you began to eat your own. The way the chicken's seasoning melted on your tongue made you close your eyes in bliss. You chewed the meat, unaware of the way the two men gazed at you.
"You look like a pig," Jungkook snapped, making you freeze. You opened your eyes to find his glaring at you, disgust written all over his face.
"Jungkook!" Taehyung growled, elbowing his ribs angrily.
"Well she does," Jungkook mumbled, taking a bite of his own food. "At least act like you belong here because you're an embarrassment now. Do you know who we are?"
"I-I'm sorry..." You heard Taehyung whisper something angrily to his boyfriend but you toned them out, finishing your food as fast as you could. You felt self-conscious the entire time and were happy when the plate was clean.
The air around the table was tense and unpleasant, the two of them not speaking until the waitress arrived. You felt relieved when she collected the plates.
"Would you like dessert?" She asked.
"Yes please!" Taehyung smiled.
"Not for me..." You made your move, standing up. Both men and the waitress looked at you with wide eyes. "I-I'm just going to go home. Thanks for the dinner..."
Before either of them could say anything, you pulled your coat on and rushed out of the door. You felt your eyes sting but you refused to cry as you began to make your way home from the terrible date.
"______, wait up!" Taehyung called to you and you stopped, looking back at him. "I uhh..." He panted. "I'm sorry for Jungkook. He's just a difficult guy to get along with!"
"If he doesn't like me then it's fine," You shrugged, hands stuffed in your pockets. "He comes before me, I know that."
"It's not that at all, _____," Taehyung sighed, running a hand through his hair. "D-Don't give up yet, okay? Let's just go with our three dates and we can decide at the end, alright?"
You looked past his shoulder to see Jungkook leaning against the wall, scrolling on his phone. Sighing, you turned back to Taehyung and met his eyes.
"Alright, we'll do it."
"You won't regret it!" Taehyung gives you that boxy smile and you can't help but smile alongside him.
Once you arrived home, your phone dinged with a text message.
From: MinHope Matching Agency This is an automated message, please do not respond. Your date has been marked as over. Please fill out the progress tracker linked here. You followed the link and were brought to a short survey.
1. Was your date satisfactory? — Somewhat
2. Did you and your partner(s) get along? — Somewhat
3. Do you plan to go on the next scheduled date? — Yes
A completion page came up thanking you for taking and claiming they would be sending the information of your next date in a few days.
Still feeling dejected by Jungkook's behavior towards you, you curled up in bed intending to sleep.
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Thankfully, it was cool out by the time your second date with them came along. The sky was painted purples and reds, casting a comforting glow over the landscape.
As you walked to the designated area for your date, you were glad to see Taehyung and Jungkook already there. Hanging back a bit, you watched as Jungkook grinned at his boyfriend — a cute bunny-like smile you'd not expected him to have. Leaning forward, Taehyung planted a soft kiss against Jungkook's nose.
You smiled at the scene, finding them cute.
However, the moment was broken when you met Jungkook's gaze and all the light disappeared in a second. His lips moved as he muttered something to Taehyung, most likely to let him know you were here because Taehyung was suddenly bouncing up to you happily.
"Hey beautiful! Nice to see you!" He greeted, surprising you by grabbing your hand.
You stumbled a bit over the uneven terrain before you were able to take a seat on the thick blanket laid out on the ground.
"Boy the agency really goes all out, huh?" You asked, making conversation.
Above you there was a canopy set up, glowing with the effect of the white fairy lights strung up. With the sun setting quickly, it became the only real source of light as you all sat together with a large picnic basket in the center.
"MinHope is like...famous for their date setups, you know?" Taehyung nodded, flipping open the box to reveal an assortment of food.
"Oh," You held out your hand as Taehyung put a sandwich in it. "Thank you."
"Is that chicken swiss?" Jungkook asked, leaning a bit closer to you.
"Yeah I think so..." You replied, peeking at the label on it. He didn't provide an answer, merely looking off and picking at the rapper on his own sandwich. "Do you...want it?"
He grunted in response, not speaking up placed his own sandwich down and held his hand out for yours. You met Taehyung's eyes, seeing he was holding back a smile as he watched the trade go down.
By the time you finished all the food, it was dark and the moon hung high in the sky.
"What time is it?" You asked, not feeling like looking at your phone.
"It's 8:42," Taehyung answered, glancing at his watch. "Should you be getting home?"
"Probably," You smiled. “I've got some work to do tomorrow.
"Oh? What do you do?" He asked, taking your hand to help you stand up.
"I'm uhh...a video game programmer," You shrugged, feeling silly compared to their own CEO positions.
"Oh really?!" Taehyung gasped, yanking on Jungkook's arm. "Kook loves video games!"
Jungkook grumbled, tugging himself out of Taehyung's grasp as the older laughed. Through the faint lighting, you could still tell Jungkook's cheeks were turning red.
"How about we walk you home?" Taehyung offered. He squeezed your hand, making you realize he was still holding it. His hand was big and very warm with pretty, lithe.
"That'd be nice..." You smiled, letting him lead you out of the area where your date had been set up. "Do we need to clean that up?"
"The Agency will take care of it," Jungkook replied, hands shoved in his pocket as he trailed behind the two of you.
"That's right, don't worry about it," Taehyung grinned, swinging your hand between the two of you.
Glancing over your shoulder, you saw Jungkook staring off into the street absentmindedly. You wanted to include him but, you knew he didn't feel that close to you just yet.
"My apartment is here," You paused in front of a tall building.
"Really? Here?" Jungkook piped up, slight disgust in his tone.
"I think it's cute," Taehyung quickly added. "A-Anyway, do you want us to walk you in?"
"I-It's fine..." You muttered, giving a slight glare at Jungkook — who was viciously avoiding your gaze, finding a crack in the sidewalk very interesting. "I can do it."
"Hang on," Taehyung reached into his pocket to pull out a slip of paper, shoving it into your hands. "I'll see you later!"
You watched as Taehyung grabbed Jungkook's wrist, tugging him along. Just before they slipped out of view, Jungkook looked over his shoulder back at you. It caused your heart to stutter in your chest.
Sitting on your bed after showering and changing into you pajamas, you looked at the slip of paper Taehyung had given to you.
"His phone number..." You whipped out your own phone, creating a new contact number under his name and shooting him a text.
To: Kim Taehyung [9:18PM] Hey, letting you know it's me, ____!
Almost immediately, three bubbles popped up to indicate he was typing.
From: Kim Taehyung [9:18PM] I'd like to apologize for Jungkook. He can be a little loose lipped with a silver tongue but he really doesn't mean it. He just...doesn't know how to express himself well.
To: Kim Taehyung [9:19PM] It's okay. I don't think he's all that bad after all...
From: Kim Taehyung [9:19PM] I'm glad to hear that. We can't wait for our next date.
You smiled, gazing at the text with your heart pounding heavily. You told him 'me too' before another text came in.
From: MinHope Matching Agency This is an automated message, please do not respond. Your date has been marked as over. Please fill out the progress tracker linked here. You were brought to a similar page to the last survey, only this one contained different questions.
1. Was your date satisfactory? — Yes
2. Do you feel that you and your partner(s) are getting closer? — Yes
3. Are there any complaints you have, this will not be conveyed to your partner(s). — None
You read over Taehyung's texts once again, feeling at ease over his words. Remembering how nice his hand felt in yours, you began to drift off. The last thing you thought of was that you hoped to meet the real Jungkook soon.
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You were surprised to see there was a change in your third date's location when you woke up that Saturday.
Instead of an amusement park like it had been, it had been switched to a high-end club and bar. It was notorious for all the rich and famous attending, a very prevalent clientele frequented it as VIP guests. You didn't question it when Taehyung texted you that you would be receiving a package.
However, as you stared down at the Gucci box, it felt like your brain was being fried.
Whipping out your phone, you pulled up your text thread with him.
To: Kim Taehyung [3:57PM] Did you send me this? picture.attachment
From: Kim Taehyung [3:57PM] Oh? It arrived? I'm so glad! Please try it on and send us a photo!
Your cheeks felt hot at the text but got up to do as he asked anyway.
The sleek, black dress fit tightly and very well. It made your breasts look...phenomenal and you instantly felt sexier and more confident. While still running with the feeling, you snapped a few photos in the mirror — keeping your unmade hair and face out of it. The second you hit send, there was a read receipt showing that he saw it. He didn't respond, however, and anxiety quickly set in. You set your phone down, gazing at yourself again, moving side to side to check the fit. The color looked lovely against your skin tone.
Your phone went off, indicating an incoming text message and you pounced on your phone to see.
From: Kim Taehyung [4:13PM]
Wow...you look...incredible.
You couldn't help but beam at the praise, instantly feeling lifted by his words. Before you could reply, another text was coming in.
From: Kim Taehyung [4:14PM]
We'll pick you up at 8. Be ready by then. Can't wait to see you, sweetheart.
You just knew the rest of the day was going to chug by slowly, especially now that you were completely flustered by his us of a pet name.
At 8 on the dot, Taehyung texted you asking what your apartment number was. Mindlessly, you gave him the number; 302.
You were slipping on your heels when the doorbell rang to your apartment. Stumbling to the door, pulling your last shoe on, you tugged the door open only to have a large bouquet of flowers shoved in your face.
"I uhh...hope you're not allergic or anything..." Taehyung smiled, handing them to you.
"Oh they're lovely, Taehyung, thank you..." You brought them up to your nose to inhale the sweet scent. "Let me go put them in some water, come on in. Where's Jungkook?"
"He's still down in front, waiting in the car," Taehyung answered, following you to the kitchen.
He fell silent, watching you fill up a vase with some water for the flowers. Placing them on the kitchen table, you smiled at how they lit up the room.
"You do look lovely, _____," He complimented you, moving closer to take your hand.
"You look...fantastic yourself, Taehyung," You said, looking over his clothes.
He was dressed in black slacks and a tucked in white button-down with the first several buttons undone. The beautiful tan expanse of his tanned chest was utterly tantalizing and you had the urge to run your fingers along his pecs and press kisses to his neck until he moaned. He shining diamond choker he wore only had you squeezing your thighs together in want.
He was so completely and utterly attractive. His voice and touch were addictive. His voice was melodic and had you yearning to hear it more.
"Are you ready to go?" He asked suddenly, pulling you from your lewd daydreams.
"Y-Yeah..." You allowed him to lead you out by the hand, unaware of the way he smirked once out of your direct eyesight.
When Taehyung said Jungkook was waiting in the car, you didn't expect him to mean an actual limo with their own driver.
But that is exactly what you were introduced to.
Their driver's name was Eugene and he was a very kind, older man who opened and closed the door for you.
"Hi Jungkook," You greeted once you took a seat in the limousine.
"Hey," He greeted, scanning you up and down quickly before looking out the window. Though he didn't smile, you were happy to see the warmth in his gaze as he regarded you.
The outside of the club was spectacularly lit up with the longest line of people waiting to get in than you'd ever seen. Eugene opened the door and the three of you piled out easily.
To your surprise, they didn't even have to wait in the line — they just nodded at the security guard and waltzed right in with you in tow.
Inside, there was music blasting and a huge sea of moving bodies on the dance floor. Taehyung quickly took your hand and escorted you, Jungkook leading the way through the dance floor to the back where there were some spiraling stairs. There was a plaque on a stand at the beginning of them that read 'VIP ONLY'. It made you swell with pride that you were entering with these two men — you hoped they felt the same sense of pride being with you.
It was much quieter inside the room — which had been reserved for the three of you.
You finally had the opportunity to look at Jungkook clearly. His look was the complete opposite of Taehyung's. His hair was unkempt and a bit wavy as it hung in his eyes. He wore black jeans, a white t-shirt beneath a leather jacket.
The contrast between the two of them was intoxicating and you quickly downed a shot that was given to you.
The three of you made small talk, you got used to being in an environment. You took a few shots, blushing when they teased you about how you cringed at the taste.
"You're cute, you're already flushed!" Taehyung teased, pinching your cheek.
"I-It's because you're teasing me!" You argued, hiding your face beneath your hands.
Even Jungkook began to laugh the more flustered you became. Finally unable to take it, you jumped to your feet.
"How about we go and dance, yeah?" You grabbed both their hands, pulling them to their feet.
"You two go ahead, I've a phone call to make," Taehyung smiled. He could see the two of you hesitate at the prospect of being alone but he ushered you out.
"A-Are you sure?" Jungkook asked, his stuttering so unlike him.
You realized it was your chance to get closer to Jungkook. If you took charge he was sure to open up more to you; if he wasn't willing to do more, then you would!
"Yeah, let's go Jungkook!" The alcohol in your system gave you the courage to grab his arm, tugging him out the door. "Show me how well you dance!"
It was hot on the dance floor, and you could feel a slight layer of sweat building up the second you were packed in with all the bodies moving around you. Still, as you stood close to Jungkook you were pleased with how nice he smelt. His hand gripped your waist as your bodies moved in sync to the beat playing through the club.
Two songs played before another body finally pressed against you from behind. You were surprised, ready to turn around and tell the person off when you caught sight of Taehyung's piercing eyes.
Pressed between two bodies like you were, you slowly began to lose yourself to the beat and the alcohol flowing through you.
After another song, you pulled away to tell Jungkook something.
"I'm going to get a drink, I'll be back!" He nodded in response, letting you squeeze out from between them to find the public bar just off the dance floor.
You could feel eyes on you as you took a seat on the stool, letting the ice in your drink cool your heated body. Glancing over your shoulder, you expected to see Taehyung and Jungkook. Unfortunately, they seemed to have been sucked into the sea of the crowd.
You turned back around, only to find a man unsettlingly close to your face.
"Um...can I help you?" You asked, frowning and leaning away as you smelt the liquor on his breath.
"That's a cute little get up you got there," He complimented, eyes raking down your body. "You here with someone, baby?"
"Yeah she is, back off," A strong arm grabbed your arm and dragged you away from the scene.
You could see Jungkook's leather-clad shoulders in front of you as he led you back to the VIP lounge you had been in.
Taehyung was already inside, sitting with his legs cross and a glass of sometimes spinning in his hand making the liquid sqirl. His jaw was set as you were escorted inside by Jungkook.
"I knew you'd be dangerous in this little get up, babygirl," He cooed, standing up to tower above you.
Instead of feeling intimidated, you felt yourself gush into your panties at the raw dominance he exuded. Leaning down, his lips just out of reach of yours, he smirked.
"All eyes were on you and fuck if I didn't love that..." He whispered, meeting your eyes — pupils blown wide before he pulled away. "I've called Eugene, let's go..."
Instead of Taehyung taking your hand, Jungkook was the one who did. Your heart raced in your chest as he squeezed your hand — his fingers more callused and rough than Taehyung's. You couldn't help but think of what it would be like having those fingers stuffed inside you. You bit your lip, holding back a whimper; missing the way Taehyung chuckled.
It was silent in the limo, Jungkook's hand still in yours and Taehyung's resting on your bare thigh. You wished he would slide his hand up to fit between your legs — slide those long digits into your panties and feel how wet you were.
"Hey Eugene, stop here please," Taehyung suddenly called, which the driver followed.
Once the limo was pulled over, Taehyung opened the door and the three of you got out. You were near your apartment and you realized they intended to walk you home instead of dropping you off.
Standing in between the two of them, they both held your hands as you began to walk.
"You...really suit that dress," Jungkook complimented you, nearly making you gasp in surprise. Maybe it was the alcohol making him even more loose lipped and open than usual.
"It really does, you picked it well," Taehyung added, beaming from ear to ear.
"You picked it out, Jungkook?" You asked, looking over at him. His ears were flushed as he avoided your gaze. He didn't answer but you still smiled, squeezing his hand. "Thank you. I really love it."
"You do?" He asked, peeking through his bangs at you.
"I really do!" You grinned.
"I'm glad," He breathed, visibly relaxing as you continued your walk.
"Can I ask you guys something?" You asked.
"Sure," Taehyung responded immediately.
"How are two Doms together like you are?" You hoped you wouldn't offend them. It seemed you didn't as Taehyung smiled.
"It just takes a lot of communication and understanding. Kook and I grew up together and our relationship happened more organically than being assigned to one another. We are technically together but it's not completely...legal until a submissive is involved," He explained swiftly.
"I see..." You smiled, squeezing his hand as the three of you stopped in front of your apartment complex. "Well I'm glad I was matched with the two of you!"
"It was a really nice time tonight, _____," Jungkook said. "Don't forget to fill out the tracker tonight, okay? It's really important."
"Will do," You smiled.
The three of you stood together in silence, albeit a little awkward. You met their gazes and slowly released their hands. You really didn't want to go, you wanted the night to continue and you wanted their company to remain.
"_____," Taehyung stopped you from turning your back to them.
When you turned around, you were pulled into a fierce kiss. You immediately relaxed into it, wrapping your arms around his neck the deeper it went. Before it could go on too long, he pulled away.
You were quickly lured into another kiss — with Jungkook. You could taste the alcohol on his lips but you didn't mind. He was rougher than Taehyung, wrapping his hand in your hair as he deepened it.
Pulling away, he smirked. "We'll see you later, kitten."
Flushing, you barely noticed Taehyung kissing your forehead before they both departed. Holding your hand against your chest, you could feel how it was racing.
Finally in the comfort of your apartment, you kicked your heels off. The way your feet ached reminded you that the lovely night wasn't all an alcohol-induced fantasy.
Sitting on your couch, you jumped when your phone went of. Excited in the hopes of seeing Taehyung's name, you sighed when you saw it was just the Agency. But Jungkook's words echoed in your mind; 'Don't forget to fill out the tracker tonight, okay? It's really important.'
From: MinHope Matching Agency This is an automated message, please do not respond. Your date has been marked as over. Please fill out the progress tracker linked here.
As expected, it was a survey.
1. Was your third date satisfactory? — Yes
2. Do you feel that you and your partner(s) need additional dates? — No
3. Can you say that you feel you could be the Dominant/Submissive to your partner(s)? — Yes
After submitting it, you immediately received a phone call from Jung Hoseok. You didn't even have a chance to read the end screen that had popped up.
"H-Hello?" You asked, scrambling to pick up.
"Good evening, Miss. _____. The three of you have all filled out your survey and agreed additional dates were unnecessary," You grinned, happy to hear you all agreed. "So, in that case, I'd like to ask you to come to the building. Please report to my office tomorrow at noon on the dot, if you don't mind."
"I'll be there!" You replied, positively beaming with excitement.
"See you then!" Hoseok chirped before hanging up.
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You swiftly entered the office of Jung Hoseok, smiling when you saw Taehyung and Jungkook already sitting there. At Hoseok's motion, you took a seat between the two of them.
"You all agreed extra dates aren't necessary," Hoseok said, folding his hands in his lap. "And from your other feedback, I take it the matching was a success."
The three of you answered with a chorus of 'yes' to which Hoseok positively beamed at. He opened a drawer on his desk, pulling out three papers, handing one to each of you.
"This is a contact...binding the union," He said, wiggling his brows with a grin on his face. "All you need to do is sign and you will be legally matched as Dom-Sub-Dom!"
You bit your lip, your hand was shaking as you signed your name. It wasn't from nerves, however, but excitement.
The three of you handed your papers to Hoseok and he smiled, placing them beside his computer,
"That's all I needed from you today. You have one final date — on the house as celebration," Hoseok said. "I advise you use this final date to make living arrangements and other important things."
To your surprise, your fourth date was at the same restaurant that you'd had your first meeting in. Thankfully, there was none of the awkwardness that was there in the past. Jungkook was grinning and cracking jokes as the three of you shared a dessert.
"We want to be crystal clear transparent with you, _____," Taehyung said, placing his glass of water down. "I won't beat around the bush so I'll just tell you that...we want you to move in with us."
"Alright," You agreed easily, grinning at the two of them. "But I have a condition."
"What is it?" Jungkook asked.
"I also want to keep my apartment," You said.
"Why?" Jungkook and Taehyung asked at the same time. "You'll have all you'll need with us." Taehyung asked.
"I know that, but I just...want a place of my own. For work," You shrugged, picking at the cake on your plate.
"Alright..." Jungkook and Taehyung shared a look, one that your missed. "If that's what you want."
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You sighed, dropping your bags on the floor of the master bedroom. It smelled heavenly inside, a sweet mixture of both their scents. The room had a view looking over the city, and with the sun setting it was a heavenly light of orange and reds.
"Welcome home, princess," Jungkook whispered, walking closer to you.
Ever since you had been legally together, they'd opened their Dominant sides to you. You hadn't been able to experience it in the bedroom yet, but the way they would give you nicknames and touch you just exuded power.
"Thank you..." You whispered, feeling yourself grow more antsy the closer he was.
"Eyes up, baby," He gripped your chin, making you look at him. "Thank you what?"
You grew breathless, remembering the title he wanted you to call him by. "Th-Thank you, Sir."
"Good girl," You keened under the praise, your cheeks growing hot. "Let's go see Tae, he's got something for you."
"Y-Yes Sir," You choked out, trying to ignore the way calling him that set your body alight.
He took your hand and escorted you out of the bedroom to the living room. You were shocked to find Taehyung standing in the middle of the room, by the large windows, holding a jewelry box in his hands.
"Come here, babygirl," He beckoned you over with Jungkook in tow. "It took us a lot of time to pick this out and we hope you'll like it."
He held it out for you and with trembling hands, you lifted the lid up to find a choker encrusted with an assortment of jewels, making it glisten and shine in the diminishing sunlight. Your eyes were as wide as saucers as you took the dangling pendant and found two engravings — JJK on one side and KTH on the other.
"I don't know if you did this with your last Dom but," Jungkook took it out of the box, allowing Taehyung to put it down. "It's kind of something we really wanted to do."
"You're collaring me?" You asked, feeling tears prick your eyes as you gazed at them in wonder.
"Of course we are," Taehyung chuckled, lifting your hair from around your neck so Jungkook could hook it onto you. "You're ours and this shows it."
"Thank you..." You choked out, leaning forward to press a kiss to Taehyung's lips before turning around to give the same to Jungkook.
"Our pleasure," Taehyung smiled, moving closer to you once again.
Pressed between both of their bodies, you could help the way your body reacted. Your lips met Taehyung’s again and you whimpered. Jungkook took the opportunity to press his lips against your neck, skimming them over the collar now around your neck. He hands gripped your waist, pulling your shirt up ever so slightly to touch the skin that became exposed. Goosebumps arose across your skin and you gasped into Taehyung's mouth. The elder chuckled, reaching down to where Jungkook's deft fingers explored to tug up the hem of your shirt.
Already, you could feel your mind turning fuzzy, easily falling into your submissive roll to let them mold you how they wanted. Jungkook chuckled as you lifted your arms, allowing Taehyung to pull your shirt off. Left in your bra, you couldn't help but cover your chest as vulnerability set in.
"None of that, kitten," Jungkook growled, ripping your arms away from your chest. "You wanna be a good girl for us right? Let us take care of you?"
"Y-Yes Sir..." You whined, whining when Taehyung leaned down pressing kisses against your chest above the seam of your bra. Gasping, you pushed your chest out to get more of the feeling.
"What a sweet girl," Taehyung cooed, falling to his knees in front of you.
You couldn't help but lace your fingers through his hair. He pressed his lips against your stomach, his tongue sneaking out to leave a wet path all the way from your ribs to the band of your jeans.
You held your breath as Jungkook reached behind you, unclipping your bra and letting it fall away.
"Fuck," He breathed into your ear, eagerly reaching up and cupping them both in his hands. "Such pretty tits, huh Tae?"
"Fuck yeah," Taehyung groaned, quickly undoing the button of your jeans and tugging them down.
You leaned back, using Jungkook as support to help Taehyung pull your jeans off completely. He tossed them away in a heap nearby and without wasting a second, his mouth was on your core. The fabric of your panties impeded feeling his mouth on your fully but as he slid his tongue over your slit and caught your clit, you let out a soft moan.
"What a good girl for us," Jungkook groaned, hands still cupping your breasts. He pinched your nipples, making your back arch as you cried out.
"Sir! P-Please do that again," You whined, unsure if you wanted to watch the way Jungkook worked your breasts or watch the way Taehyung continued to eat you out through your panties.
They were wet and sticking to you perfectly by now — the white now transparent with a mixture of his saliva and your own juices. He groaned suddenly, reaching up and tugging your panties down your legs until you stepped out of them.
Finally naked, he took a minute to look you over.
"You are...absolutely spectacular," He breathed, harshly pulling one of your legs over his shoulder.
"Daddy!" You cried as his tongue slid through your folds. He moaned at the unimpeded taste of your cunt. Circling your entrance, he eagerly tasted everything you had to offer.
You clutched his hair, already beginning to tremble by the time he finally latched onto your swollen clit. You couldn't help but grind your hips down to meet his hot mouth.
His tongue was hot and wet as they slid through your folds. Suddenly, Jungkook reached down and pushed the elders head away. As Taehyung pulled away still licking his lips, his eyes were dark and hazy. Before you could complain, Jungkook placed a well-aimed slap across your vulnerable cunt.
"Fuck!" You shrieked, spasming when he gave you another one. "Sir I—!"
"Watch your mouth and don't be greedy," Jungkook growled.
"S-Sir?" You whimpered, looking up at him with teary eyes.
"You take what Taehyung gives you first of all," Jungkook muttered, soothing his hand over your wet folds where he had hit you to soothe the sting. "And good girls don't say bad words do they?"
"N-No Sir," You sniffled. "I'll be good, I promise."
"I know you will, babygirl," He sighed, nodding to Taehyung to let him resume. "We just want to make you feel good. We don't want to have to punish you."
"Th-Thank you Sir," You whispered, eyes rolling back into your head when Taehyung used two long fingers to spread your folds open for his greedy tongue.
"Don't just thank me. I'm not the one eating your pretty little cunt, am I?" Jungkook chuckled, reaching up to glide his thumbs over your perked nipples.
"Ah, th-thank you Daddy!" You cried, your hips jerking when his tongue swirled around your clit.
"Thank you for what, baby?" Taehyung asked, dark eyes gazing through his bangs.
"Th-Thank you f-for eating my p-pussy..." You breathed, your mouth falling open as you trailed off in a moan. Taehyung's entire mouth enveloped your core, sucking your clit harshly. His moans vibrated against the bud and you broke off into a sob.
You could feel your high building, reaching the point of no return. The more his tongue stimulated you, the higher you rose. All you could think was that you couldn't, shouldn't and wouldn't cum without permission.
You wanted to be a good girl.
"D-Daddy?!" You cried, reaching down to tug at his soft locks.
"What is it?" He asked, pulling away just slightly.
"C-Can I cum?" You panted, eyes unfocused as he continued to lick your sensitive clit.
"Hmm..." He hummed against it, making you sob once again before he pulled away. "I don't know. Kook, what do you think?"
"I don't think she deserves it," Jungkook snapped, reaching up to wrap his hand lightly around your throat. The pressure was a threat, just barely enough to cause any air restriction.
"Mmm, I don't think so either," Taehyung chuckled when you whined in complaint as he pulled away and stood up. "A good girl doesn't get her cunt spanked, huh?"
"But—!" Jungkook's grip around your throat tightened, cutting your argument off.
"Right?" Taehyung hissed, his nose just barely brushing yours.
Your felt your mind go fuzzy, your eyes falling heavy the harder Jungkook squeezed. Just before it felt like your mind was going to go blank, he let go and you gasped for air.
"R-Right Daddy," You coughed, eyes tearing up as you choked out the words.
"Good girl," He smiled, leaning down to press a kiss to your lips.
It was fleeting and you didn't get a chance to return it before he was walking away to walk down the hall in the direction of the bedroom.
"Let's go, babygirl," Jungkook whispered, his warmth leaving your back as he followed after the elder. You watched as he disappeared from view, leaving you alone and naked in the living room with your juices running down your legs from your denied orgasm.
With trembling legs, you stumbled down the hallway into the bedroom. Your heart stuttered in your chest as you found the two of them locked in a soft kiss. Jungkook was sitting on the bed with Taehyung leaning over him, cupping the back of his head to control the kiss.
They had both been stripped of their shirts. Jungkook wore his pair of sweats and Taehyung was in a pair of black boxer-briefs.
"Hmm?" Jungkook pulled away, glancing towards you standing unsteadily in the doorway. "Look at that, Tae. Look how fucked out she already is. It's almost pathetic."
"I think it's cute," Taehyung teased, smirking when you squeezed your thighs together to alleviate the pressure in your core as the stared at your exposed body.
"Come here then, babygirl," Jungkook sighed, scooting up the bed so his back rested against the headboard.
You scrambled onto the bed, crawling up to him on all fours. He chuckled, petting your head softly as he met your teary eyes. The way your bottom lip wobbled indicating how completely under their control you'd become.
"Tell us baby," Jungkook whispered. "Do you remember the safe word?"
"R-Red," You whispered, licking your lips as you stared at his exposed chest.
"Good girl," He cooed, grinning when you keened under the praised immediately. "Sit in my lap. Face Tae."
You did as you were told, your back resting comfortably against his chest. Sitting between his legs, you could feel how hard his cock was beneath you. You shifted, subtly grinding against him.
"Fuck," Jungkook groaned, his head falling onto your shoulder as he gripped your waist to stop your movements almost immediately. "You better behave."
"Y-Yes Sir..." You whispered.
"Spread your legs nice and wide," Taehyung suddenly ordered, still standing at the foot of the bed.
Your breathing picked up as you did as you were told. Resting your weight against Jungkook behind you, you let your legs fall open completely. Both men groaned as your cunt was exposed to both of them fully.
Jungkook reached down, spreading your folds open so your entrance was vulnerable to their greedy eyes. You whined, feeling yourself clench and gush around nothing. You were so wet, absolutely dripping and your clit was throbbing as it begged for attention.
Taehyung finally climbed onto the bed, the mattress dipping beneath his weight.
In the blink of an eye, two long, thick fingers were sheathed as deep as possible into your tight hole. Your back arched as you stared at the ceiling, white danced in your vision. You couldn't make a sound as Taehyung crooked his fingers up to find your g-spot.
Having been denied an orgasm several moments ago, you were already close once again. Taehyung pumped his fingers in and out, scraping against your spot with every movement. You reached down, wrapping your arms beneath your knees to keep yourself open for him.
"Look at that," Jungkook cooed. "What a good girl!"
"Daddy! Please!" You cried, your eyes stinging with tears as you realized you couldn't cum from just this.
"What is it baby?" Taehyung drawled, speeding the pace he pounded his fingers into you.
"Please, please, please..." You sobbed, your legs trembling so hard it was visible to the both of them.
"Can't cum baby?" Jungkook asked, voice dark with laughter. "Need someone to touch your little clit to cum, hm?"
"Yes please!" You whined, tossing your head back to look at him with watery eyes.
Both of them fell silent, the only sounds were your broken cries and the wet sound of Taehyung fingering your pussy. You were wound tight, so close to your release but unable to fall over the edge. It just kept building and building to painful heights before you finally felt a tear trickle down your cheek.
Immediately, Taehyung's fingers were pulled out and you fell limp. You were panting, trembling and sniffling at the second denied orgasm.
You wanted to cum so badly — you needed to cum.
"Fuck, you're such a good girl for us," Taehyung praised, crawling over you to press a kiss to your lips.
You leaned up into the kiss, deepening it as you searched for comfort after the intense orgasm you were just denied.
"We love you so much," Jungkook added, stroking your sweat-slicked hair out of your face.
They both waited for you to catch your breath, making sure that you were willing to go on. When you gave them the go ahead, they both resumed their dominant roles.
"Bet you wanna cum so fuckin' bad huh?" Jungkook asked, as you trembled before the two of them.
"S-So bad, Sir," You whimpered. The way the two of them stood at the foot of the bed watching you made you feel helpless and small. Their eyes were dark with lust and they both wore shit eating smirks that showed you just who was in control.
Your mind felt muddled, riddled with fuzz and it sounded like rushing water in your ears. It felt like you were floating, like the whole world had vanished around you and the only people in existence were you, Jungkook, and Taehyung.
"You've been a good girl," Jungkook licked his lips, hooking his thumbs into the band of his sweats. His cock was exposed for the first time and you let out a needy whimper. He was so hard, the tip a purple-red as it leaked precum from the slit. As he kicked the sweats away, he wrapped his hand around his shaft and slowly began to pump himself. He slathered the precum down his length as lubrication. "Turn over on your stomach."
"Yes Sir," You rolled yourself over on trembling arms and knees so your ass was presented to him.
The bed dipped beside you and you found Taehyung, naked as the two of you, crawling to kneel in front of you.
His cock immediately had your mouth watering. He was long and thick, precum dripping from the tip as he rested it before your lips.
"Oh? You wanna suck my cock, babygirl?" He asked, looking down at you with a smirk.
"Y-Yes please Daddy," You whispered, licking your lips as you imagined the taste of him on your tongue.
"So polite..." He chuckled, swiping the very tip of his cock across your lips before pulling away.
You licked your lips, moaning when you tasted the bitter tang of his precum immediately. You nearly forgot about Jungkook until the blunt, hot head of his cock was prodding at your entrance.
"F-Fu—Sir..." You cut yourself off from cussing, not wanting to be punished for it.
"So tight..." Jungkook growled as he began to sink into you.
Unable to hold your head up, you muffled your long moan into the covers beneath you. He seemed to go on for ages, more and more filling you up until his hips were flush with your highs and his cock was kissing your cervix.
"God...you're taking me so deep..." Jungkook groaned, spreading your cheeks apart to get a look at the way your entrance was stretched to accommodate him.
"C'mon babygirl," Taehyung mumbled, grabbing a fistful of your hair to pull your head up from the covers.
Immediately, you leaned forward to envelop the hot head of his cock in your mouth. Taehyung's reaction was instantaneous, tossing his head back and groaning as you swirled your tongue around the tip to gather all the peaking precum you could.
Behind you, Jungkook began a slow pace — getting you used to being filled like you were once again. You arched your back, eager to have more of him inside you.
You took Taehyung as deep as you could, pushing against your gag-reflex until you choked on him and had to pull back. His hand was still wrapped in your hair, shallowly thrusting his hips against your mouth.
The two of them let out moans and groans of pleasure — getting off on your body. Your eyes were closed, unable to keep them open throught he onslaught of pleasure attacking your body.
Jungkooks cock, thick and hot as it stretched you open nailed your g-spot every time he sunk himself inside you. His large hands gripped your hips, using them as leverage to slam himself as deep as possible. Every time his brushed your cervix, your body tightened up at the pain-pleasure it gave you.
"Relax your throat," Taehyung suddenly ordered, making you open your eyes.
Your vision was doubled through both the fuzz muddling up your mind and the tears that had begun to build from choking around him. Still, you did as you were told, relaxing your throat completely and letting your eyes slide closed again.
"No, keep them open," He growled, tugging your hair roughly until your eyes fluttered open again. It was hard to do as Jungkook continued to fuck you roughly. "Look at me while I fuck your throat."
You mumbled incoherently around him, blinking slowly as you met his eyes. He was smirking, an almost cruel look in his eyes as he slowly began to sink his cock all the way into your throat. You went to pull back as you choked around him, your gag-reflex kicking in, but his grip on your hair had you held in place. You felt your eyes roll in the back of your head when he was fully sheathed in your throat.
"Swallow," He ground out, teeth clenched.
You did was you were told, feeling tears spill past and drip down your cheeks. Taehyung groaned, pulling back slowly only to repeat the process.
Your mind was assaulted by everything you were feeling, Jungkook's cock stretching you open and Taehyung's fat cock stuffed down your throat. You couldn't think of anything beyond being on the bed speared on both men's cocks.
"Fuck, I'm going to cum," Jungkook groaned, his hips beginning to stutter.
Quickly, Taehyung yanked your mouth off his cock, leaving you gasping for air as Jungkook fucked himself into you at an almost brutal pace. The younger reached up, gripping you by the shoulder for leverage as his orgasm began to crest. He sunk himself balls-deep, a flood of his cum filling your spasming cunt. You could feel his cock throbbing inside you with every wave of his orgasm.
"Fuck baby!" He moaned, head tossed back in pleasure.
His body was stiff for several long, drawn out seconds as his cock began to soften. When he pulled out, his cum gushed out as your cunt uncontrollably clenched.
"Oh look at that...you're wasting my cum, kitten," He tsked, watched as his cum stained the bedding.
"Guess the only thing to do is to plug up that gushing cunt huh?" Taehyung chastised.
Before you knew it, the two of them were switching places and you were rolled over onto your back. You realized your arms had been falling asleep. They tingled as you finally pulled your weight off them. The pain was put on the back burner as Taehyung's cock was quickly sheathed in your hot core.
He was thicker and longer than Jungkook, unable to sink completely inside you. There was brief burning as he stretched you more than you had been but your excess arousal mixed with Jungkook cum offered perfect lubricant. Your eyes rolled as you cried out reaching up to grip Jungkook's thick thighs for leverage. He let you, watching with a tired look in his eyes as Taehyung fucked you eagerly for his own orgasm.
"You've been so good, babygirl," Jungkook praised, cupping your bouncing breasts in his warm hands.
"Such a good girl," Taehyung added, his skin slapping against yours loudly. "I think you deserve to cum, yeah?"
"Yes...yes please!" You shrieked, energy renewed with the promise of your long awaited orgasm dangling in front of you.
"Alright, baby, you can cum," Jungkook cooed, sliding his hand from your breasts, past your ribs, down your stomach to rest his digits on your hard clit.
"Taking this fat cock so well," Taehyung growled, voice deeper than you'd ever heard it. "Go ahead and cream on me like a good fucking girl."
Your whole body seemed to lock up as your orgasm reached it's peak. It felt like ages before the first wave truly began to roll over you. Jungkook held your body close to him as you trembled violently through the high. Your eyes were wide but unseeing as Taehyung continued to brutally fuck you through the almost painful orgasm wracking through your sensitive body.
Jungkook's fingers didn't cease dancing over your little bud, even as a sob tore itself through your throat.
Just as it felt like your high was ending, another wave washed over you. Taehyung suddenly froze, bottomed out as deep as he could go, before he came inside you. His cum mixed with Jungkooks, leaking past your entrance to join the already made mess beneath you. Feeling him cum so much inside you, you felt one last gush from your orgasm — wetness raining down on the three of you.
The room fell still, Jungkooks trembling digits falling away from your clit as Taehyung pulled out of you. You were panting, mouth open as your chest heaved from the strongest orgasm you'd ever experienced in your life. It felt like your entire body was weighed down with lead but you felt your cunt clench again when Taehyung scooped up a dollop of escaped cum.
He looked as his fingers for a second before popping them in his mouth. His eyes rolled as he moaned, unable to hold himself back. You could've nearly cried when he suddenly leaned down so his face was at your heat again.
He thankfully kept his licks light, knowing how incredibly sensitive you would be after the orgasm you'd just had. He ate out all the cum he possible could for several seconds.
Then, above your recovering body, he met Jungkook for a sloppy kiss. Shockingly, another wave of arousal flashed through you as you watched them share the cum Taehyung just ate out of you.
You closed your eyes, unable to keep them open anymore as their moaning faded into darkness.
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You sat down at a spare table, your laptop open in front of you as you browsed through your emails. With both Jungkook and Taehyung working, you felt a little lonely at the penthouse so you decided to surround yourself with people. Sipping on a drink you'd ordered, you failed to notice the approaching figure coming towards your table.
"Excuse me," You tore your gaze from your laptop screen to meet her eyes. She was tall with short black hair. "Are you _____ by chance?"
"Um yes that's me," You watched as she glanced over her shoulder before taking the empty chair across from you. You followed her gaze, finding nobody where she had been looking. "Can I help you?"
"You're Taehyung and Jungkook's sub right?"
Her words caught you off guard and you couldn't help but stutter. "H-How did you—"
"I have a friend," She said, shaking her head. "That's not what's important. My name is Park Soomin, do you know me?"
"I can't say that I do..." You slowly closed your laptop, realizing you weren't going to be getting anymore done.
Soomin sighed, appearing dejected by the news. "I figured they wouldn't' tell you...but I'd at least expected them to tell you they had another sub before..."
"Wait what? Repeat that again?" You nearly knocked your drink off the table as he leaned closer to her.
"They had an submissive before you," She mumbled, twiddling her thumbs nervous. Once again, she took a glance around the room over her shoulders. "
"And you're telling me...that someone was you?" You scoffed, leaning back with your arms crossed. "You got any proof?"
"Oh! Sure," You held in a sigh, having hoped she'd fail to have any. "Here you go."
She slid a worn, crumpled piece of paper in front of you. You flipped it over, revealing the matching information for when they were together along with the termination. They separated over two years before you matched with them. Typically, the information on separation was kept confidential so you took all the time you had to read what the paper said.
Termination reason: Party revealed to exhibit toxic behavior in relationship.
"What does that mean?" You asked, pointing to the part you had just read.
"That's why I wanted to talk to you," She sighed, taking the paper back and folding it up. "Taehyung and Jungkook aren't what they seem to be!"
"What do you mean?" Your voice was shaky, filled with anxiety of what she would disclose. You'd only been legally together for 6 months, there was obviously a lot you still had to learn about them.
"They like to play with your feelings," She whispered, her own voice beginning to wobble. "They make you fall in love with them and then they just cruelly rip the rug out from under you and laugh when it hurts."
"Th-They haven't done anything to hurt me, though," You argued, knowing just how weak you sounded.
She smiled sympathetically, placing her hand over yours. "They haven't yet. But you have to face it, _____. They've been together all their lives, they're rich and successful. How much room is there for you really?"
"I..." Her words cut you deep, digging up insecurities you didn't even know existed.Tears stung your eyes, they were nearly impossible to hold back and the last thing you wanted to do was cry in the middle of the cafe. "I have to go."
You threw your laptop into your bag, didn't even bother to put your coat on properly before you ran out of the cafe. Belatedly, you realized you didn't throw your drink away. Wiping your eyes, you caught the tears before they actually managed to fall.
"Hey wait!" You heard a shrill cry, followed by loud clicking of heels. Turning around, you were met with Soomin, panting and still holding that sympathetic smile. "Take my number. I know how it feels to be where you are now. Call me if you need anything, alright?"
"Th-Thank you Soomin," You sniffled, tucking the paper in your pocket before turning and heading on your way once again.
By the time you got home, the hurt had ebbed away in quiet anger and humiliation. They had lied to you and just acted like they hadn't hid their past while you had laid it all out for them.
Whipping out your phone, you brought up your group chat with them.
To: Babe-Group [5:19PM] When will you be home?
Immediately there was an answer from Jungkook claiming they were on their way home at that moment. Deciding not to sit there and wait for them, you removed the makeup you'd applied for the day and put your neatly done hair into a messy bun. You sat on the bed, mindlessly playing an Idle-Tap game to pass the time.
Nearly a half hour passed before the door opened and the melodious laughter of your boyfriends filled the space.
"Baby, we're home!" Taehyung called.
As you entered the living room, frown set in place, you realized they had stopped to get some takeout.
"Got your favorite, sweetheart!" Jungkook said, reaching into the bags to pull out Chicken Bulgogi.
For some reason, it was the last straw for the bad day and before you knew it, the tears you'd been fighting off finally trickled down your face. Sniffling loudly, you used your sweater sleeve to wipe your eyes dry only for more to take their place.
"Whoa, hey, what is it?" Taehyung gasped, rushing over to you in hopes to console you.
"Y-You lied to me!" You shrieked, turning your crying into a teary glare.
"What? What are you talking about?" Jungkook asked, rounding the couch to meet you and Taehyung in the hallway.
"Soomin," You spat out her name, watching them like hawks.
As expected, the both of them stiffened with their eyes wide. Mouths open, they shared a look and even with no words said, it gave you exactly what you needed to know.
"Did you think I wouldn't find out?!" You cried.
"Baby, we didn't—"
"No! I don't want to hear it!" You snapped, turning your back on them and stomping down the hallway to the bedroom. They followed close behind you, barging into the room after you.
"Just let us explain!" Jungkook growled, obviously growing frustrated with your anger.
"Why? So you can lie to me again?!" You argued. "She told me about you two, you know?"
"What are you talking about?" Taehyung asked, appearing more calm than Jungkook.
"That you like to play around, you're not serious!" You choked out, wiping your running nose with your sleeve. "Th-That you don't think there's any room between the two of you for a sub. A-And I should have known that!"
"_____, you're being ridiculous!" Jungkook snapped.
They both watched helplessly as you began to pack a bag of your clothes.
"You can't leave," Taehyung gasped, moving to grab your bag from your hands.
"I can do what I please! I'm not going to stay here and have you lie to me and play cruel games with my feelings!" You stormed past them, holding in your sobs as you did your best to ignore their efforts to change your mind.
"_____, baby, you've got to believe us that's not what we were doing at all!" Taehyung cried, chasing after you all the way to the door.
"Why won't you listen to us? Give us a minute to explain!" Jungkook added, stopping as you walked out of the door.
"You had your chance to explain everything to me months ago. How am I meant to trust you when you hid it from me?" You scoffed, adjusting your bag on your shoulder. "There had to have been a reason you hid it from me and right now I have every reason to believe what she told me is why. You just wanted to play your stupid games and make a fool of me."
"_____!" They both shouted until you disappeared into the closest elevator.
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You crash onto your bed, the sad single person bed you'd left behind for Taehyung and Jungkook. Crying into your pillow seemed so childish but there you were, doing just that. Your phone rang and rang, indicating numerous text messages and phone calls that simply went ignored.
When you woke up in the morning, you unlocked your phone to find tons of notifications. Still feeling the ache of their betrayal weighing heavily on your heart and mind, you dismissed them all and put your phone on Do Not Disturb mode for the day.
Deciding you deserved to treat yourself, you made yourself presentable and headed over to the local ice-cream shop. You sat on the stool with a sigh, reading the menu overhead on the wall.
"What can I get you?" A familiar voice mumbled, sounding entirely unenthused. However, when you made eye-contact with him, his eyes lit up. "______?"
"Daehoon..." You choked. "U-Uh just get me a plain vanilla in a waffle cone, please."
"Sure," He smiled, turning around to begin making your order. "I have to say it's pretty surprising to see you here!"
"Um yeah, ditto," You replied, feeling the relaxation you had been cultivating ebb away into quiet tension.
He seemed unaware of your unenthusiastic response to seeing him as he handed your ice-cream with a smile. "You know, I tried to contact you after we broke up but your number was out of service."
"Yeah I uhh...I changed it," You shrugged, licking your sweet treat.
"I figured," He smiled, leaning on the counter on his elbows in front of you. "I wanted to apologize for the way we ended. I didn't treat you right and I am man enough to admit that to you."
"Um...thanks Daehoon," You sighed, finally meeting his gaze.
"So you're still living around here, huh?" He asked.
"Yeah I...it's a nice place to live," You replied, desperately trying to end the conversation. "You know, I really ought to go. I just came to grab a cone and I should get going. What do I owe you?"
"Oh it's on the house!" He shrugged with a smile.
You sighed, reaching into your wallet and pulling out a ₩5000 and placing it on the table. You figured that ought to cover it before turning and leaving.
As you sat up late that night, going through emails you were behind on, you heard your doorbell ring. Glancing at the time, it read 10:20 PM and you could feel yourself already growing annoyed at having a visitor at that time.
"It's really late—" You froze as you opened the door to a familiar grinning face. "Daehoon. What the hell are you doing here? How did you find me?"
"I-I had a friend tell me you l-live in this building!" You quickly realized he was drunk. He was slurring and swaying where he stood. "I figured if I rang enough doors I wo-would either find you or someone would t-tell me where you w-were."
"Okay but why the hell did you come here?" You snapped, already feeling impatient over this inconvenient encounter.
"Y-You never said i-if you forgive me..." He hiccuped after he finished and you sighed, pinching the bridge of your nose.
"Yes, alright, I forgive you. Now would you please leave?" You begged.
"Alright b-but...one more thing," Before you could register what was happening, he was cupping your cheeks and planting a sloppy kiss on your lips. It took a quick second for your mind to catch up with you and when it did, you violently pulled yourself away and slammed the door in his face without saying anything. You could hear him mumble something on the other side of the door but couldn't hear him nor did you know if he was even talking to you.
Still, you heaved a sigh of relief when you looked through the peephole to find him gone.
When you woke up, the first thing you noticed was your phone lighting up. Realizing it was still on DND, you grabbed it and unlocked it. However, a text notification from an unknown number with a picture attachment.
As you opened it, you shot up straight in bed at what you saw.
It was a picture of you and Daehoon standing in the hallway in front of your apartment. And you were kissing.
To: Unknown [9:47AM] Who is this?
From: Unknown [9:48AM] Guess.
You glared at the phone number as if it would tell you itself who it was. As you looked at the last 4 digits, you realized you recognize the number. Scrambling out of bed, you dug in the bag you'd brought from the penthouse that contained your clothes. Pulling out your favorite pair of jeans, you fished in the front pocket for a piece of paper.
"Ah ha!" You unfolded the slip, looking at the phone number closely. Pulling your phone off the bed where you left it, you opened the text thread again.
To: Unknown [9:51AM] Soomin.
From: Soomin [9:51AM] Bingo! I bet you're wondering what's going on, yeah?
To: Soomin [9:51AM] You could say that again...
From: Soomin [9:52AM] Well, I'll just say that I'll explain what I really want when you meet me at the cafe we first met at noon.
To: Soomin [9:53AM] And if I don't?
From: Soomin [9:53AM] You wouldn't want Tae and Kook to get an eyeful of you locking lips with your ex, would you?
You sighed, realizing now where this was going.
To: Soomin [9:53AM] Alright...I'll be there.
From: Soomin [9:54AM] That's what I thought.
You locked your phone, not bothering to give a final response. You opened your group chat with your doms, not bothering to read the numerous texts they'd sent again. Deciding against telling them, you locked your phone and slumped down on the floor defected, feeling hopeless and anxious as you wanted for noon to roll around.
When you walked in, the once-comforting atmosphere only offered tense anxiety. Soomin sat in the corner, scrolling through her phone when you approached.
"To be honest, I thought you weren't going to show," She beamed, putting her phone away as she offered you a seat.
"I was going to if you hadn't threatened me," You grumbled as you sat. "Now what do you want? Money?"
"Oh no I don't need any money," She waved her hand. "I want them back."
"Pardon?"
"They're meant to be mine and I want them back," Her pleasant tone disappeared. "Break up with them so I can have them instead. That's it. Simple right?"
"Y-You're crazy..." You whispered, sitting back in your seat in pure disbelief. "A scheme like that wouldn't possibly work."
"Well you left them anyway right? You're staying at your old apartment," She shrugged.
"How did—" The pieces suddenly clicked. "Daehoon."
"Bingo!" She giggled. "It's a win-win scenario really. You get out of a toxic relationship and I get them back."
"If they're so toxic why do you want them so badly?" You narrowed your eyes, watching as she froze. Laughing in disbelief, you spat. "It was you who was cited for toxic behavior. Because you're actually insane!"
"And you're a little fool!" She snapped, slamming her hands on the table as she leaned in closer. "You believed everything I told you. You proved you didn't trust them and now they'll never take you back because the biggest key for a relationship like that to work is trust."
"And yet you think they'll take you back?" You scoffed, shaking your head. "You really are crazy."
"Of course they will. I'll make sure of it." She growled.
"Okay so," You stood up, shaking your head. "I've had enough of this. I'm leaving."
"So you'll do it?" She asked.
"Absolutely not," You snapped, turning your back to her.
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It was dark out when you were awoken by your doorbell going off over and over again. It was obnoxious to the point you wanted to ignore it but the more they pressed, the longer you realized you couldn't take it that long. So with a big sigh, you heaved yourself out of bed and to the living room. The loud ringing made your temples throb. Finally, you jerked the door open fully ready to chew the person on the other side out. Before you got the chance to open your mouth, you were being knocked out of the way as your boyfriends barrelled inside.
"So you made a huge fucking scene for this bullshit huh?" Jungkook shouted, storming down the hallway towards your bedroom. "Where is he?!"
"What? Where's who?!" You cried, looking at Taehyung who only stared on blankly.
"Your fucking ex," Jungkook snarled as he came back out.
"Daehoon? H-He's not here what the fuck? Why would he be?" You snapped, growing fed up with Jungkook's behavior.
"Oh I don't know," Taehyung finally spoke, unlocking his phone. "Maybe because of this."
Your heart leapt into your throat at the photo of Daehoon kissing you flashed on Taehyung's screen. You could feel your pulse begin to race in panic as you realized exactly what they thought.
"I-It's not what you think..." You stuttered, attempting to defend yourself.
"Oh yeah that's a good one," Jungkook chuckled, shaking his head. "See what we think...is that you made a huge fucking deal about us not telling you about our ex in order to get away from us and come fucking cheat on us!"
"No!" You cried, shaking your head as tears welled up in your eyes.
"Why should we believe you?" Taehyung asked, voice cold as ice. "You didn't trust us. You didn't believe us."
"Why should we believe you?" Jungkook spat.
"B-Because..." You were at a loss for words, looking desperately between their angry eyes as your own filled and stung with tears.
"I'm surprised you're not trying to deny it's you or something," Jungkook chuckled, looking at the picture. "But I guess you can't...you are wearing our collar huh. A lot that meant..."
You broke into soft sobs as his words cut you deep, making your heart ache. Mindlessly, you reached up to touch the very collar you were wearing — clutching the pendant with their initials desperately.
"We'll be filing for match-termination in the morning," Taehyung said, making his way towards the door.
Jungkook followed the older, turning to look over his shoulder at your before leaving, putting a final nail in the coffin. "We're over _____."
As the door slammed shut, you sunk onto the couch in tears. Leaning over, you sobbed into the arm rest. You cried and cried about the situation you found yourself in. It seemed like you were there for hours before the doorbell went off again — just once. You jumped to your feet, hoping with all your heart that Taehyung and Jungkook had come back.
However, when you opened it, all hopes were crushed to dust as Daehoon stood there with a grin.
"You've been crying..." He sighed, moving to step inside. You stopped him with a hand and he paused. "What is it?"
"What are you doing here?" You growled, feeling your hurt over your boyfriend's turn into fury towards your ex.
"Well I made you upset the other night...so, it's only natural that I come here and talk," He shrugged, stuffing his hands in his pockets. "You know I'm sorry and I'll be better—"
"I know you're part of everything," You snapped.
"Wh-What?" He stuttered, falling stiff.
"Soomin told me you were helping with all of this. Why on earth would I take you back after that?" You were surprised by the coldness in your own voice.
"Sh-She told you?" Daehoon asked, pulling his hands out of his pockets as he lost his cool composure. "That bitch! I should have known she would only be willing to help herself. I should have known she'd use me."
"Just get out Daehoon," You whispered, beginning to shut the door. "Don't contact me again."
That night, you slept sobbing into your pillow.
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A notification went off on your phone, indicating a new text message. You could barely gain the energy to reach forward and answer it. The name showed that the manager for your company was texting you — something he rarely did.
From: Manager. Im You've not completed any work in the past week. Our clients are getting impatient on new developments. This job opportunity will vanish before you know it if you don't pick it up.
Sighing, you locked your phone again, unable to find any reason to answer. Before you could put your phone down, you got another text message. The name had your heart shattering as it violently reminded you of what was coming.
Jung Hoseok.
However, as you opened the text, you realized it wasn't anything mentioning your match-termination. Instead, it just read 'fix this'.
You weren't sure what it was but something about those simple two words had you jumping to your feet. Not bothering to really get dressed, you simply threw on your shoes and bolted out of your apartment.
Your feet were screaming in pain by the time you were in front of the penthouse. Fishing into your pocket, you pulled out the key to the front door. As you entered, you could hear their voices drifting from down the hallway. Shutting the door as quietly as possible, you sucked in a deep breath to steel yourself for the confrontation. Feeling your heart pounding heavily, you shuffled your way to the bedroom.
As you peeked into the room, you saw the two of them hugging. Jungkook sat on the bed as Taehyung stood between his legs with his arms wrapped around his shoulders.
"Um..." You cleared your throat, startling them into pulling away.
"What the hell are you doing here?" Jungkook snarled jumping to his feet.
"I...I just want to talk..." You stepped fully into the room, wrapping your arms around your waist.
"Why would we ever listen to you?" Jungkook snapped, vicious glare fixed on you.
"B-Because...I love you and...I hope you can find it in your heart to listen to me for just a minute?" Your voice became watery as you couldn't hold back the tears welling up in your eyes.
"You're wearing it..." Taehyung whispered, making both you and Jungkook look at him. He walked over to you, reaching up to touch the dangling pendant on your collar. "Say what you need to."
You let out a sigh, feeling even sadder when Taehyung moved away to sit beside Jungkook. The younger didn't argue with Taehyung's decision but he still glared at you.
"You have to believe me...when she told me you kept your ex-sub from me, what else was I supposed to think? She gave me the only reason to believe. I-I was so hurt that you lied to me I'm so sorry I didn't listen to you," You rushed out, wanting to get it out in the open as quickly as possible. "B-But you have to believe me when I tell you I didn't cheat on you with Daehoon. Soomin told me she and Daehoon were working together so she could get you back! He kissed me and I threw him out right away!"
"How did he know where you lived?" Jungkook asked.
"I...I think Soomin found out somehow and told him. He told me that he didn't even know what apartment was mine. Just the building," You replied.
"How did you get in contact with him again?" Taehyung asked, glare softening into a gaze of curiosity.
"I...After we had our fight I was sad so..." You fought a smile. "I went to go get some ice cream and he was working there."
There was a moment of silence, Jungkook and Taehyung sharing a look as the thought your words over. Finally, Taehyung sighed and stood up.
"Alright," You felt yourself relax as he walked over to you. "We'll look into the two of them.
"D-Does this mean you believe me?" You asked, hopeful.
"No way," Jungkook snapped. "Not until there's proof."
"S-So I can't stay here?" You weren't sure why you asked, already knowing the answer.
"We don't fucking want you here," Jungkook growled, standing as well now. Taehyung made no move to stop him as he began to urge you out even as you began to cry. "Just because we're going to look into whatever bullshit you spew doesn't mean we're willing to keep you around."
Standing in the hallway, you let his words sink in. You could feel his glare burning into you and you couldn't stop the sob that tore loose. You turned on your heel and booked it towards the door, eager to escape the heavy, negative energy that filtered around you.
Nighttime rolled around and you sat curled up on the couch watching Disney movies. They gave you an excuse to cry without saying it was because you were hurting.
Three solid knocks pounded on your door and you stood up, not bothering to pause your movie. You didn't bother looking through the peephole, easily opening the door. You were greeted by a splash of red flowers in your face.
"Wha—!" You looked up to find Taehyung nursing a tender smile. "Tae..."
"Let me in?" He asked, shrugging his shoulders.
"O-Oh sure..." You stepped aside to let him in, closing the door as he kicked his shoes off. "What are you doing here?"
"I wanted to talk to you," He replied, handing the bouquet of roses to you.
You wandered to the kitchen, fishing in the cabinets to find a vase. "About?"
"I know Jungkook was harsh," He sighed, leaning against the wall as you filled the transparent pink case with water. "You know he didn't mean that. He's just...hurt."
"It's okay," You shrugged, finally placing the roses in the water. You stood back, admiring them. "You didn't come here to apologize on behalf of Jungkook, Tae."
"You're right," He sighed, taking your hand and leading you into the living room. As you both sat down, he scooted closer to you. "I came to tell you that I believe you."
"You do?" Your eyes began to well with tears again, but for the first time in two weeks it was in relief. "Really?"
"Yes," He smiled, reaching up to cup your cheek. "I love you so much and I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. I'm putting my trust in you."
"I-I love you too Taehyung," You sobbed, leaning forward to wrap yourself in his arms. "I won't let you down."
After hugging for several long second, he finally pulled away. Cupping your jaw, he pressed his lips to yours to pull you into a tender kiss.
After hugging for several long seconds, he finally pulled away. Cupping your chin, he pressed his lips to yours to pull you into a tender kiss. It didn't take long for it to deepen, his hand coming around to cup the back of your head. Your hands rested on his chest, standing on your tippy-toes to properly kiss him how you wished.
However, just as you began to lose yourself in his kiss, he tightened his grip in your hair until you whimpered in pain and pulled back.
"You've caused us a lot of heartbreak haven't you babygirl?" His sweet face was gone, replaced by a cold and detached facade.
You whimpered. "Y-Yes Daddy..."
"Are you sorry for what you did?" He asked, looking down at you.
"Y-Yes I'm so sorry, Daddy..." You choked out, wincing when he pulled harder on your hair.
"If you're really sorry, you'll take a punishment like a good girl right?" He asked.
You nodded as much as you could. "Yes, Daddy. I'll be so good. Please punish me, Daddy!"
"On your knees, slut," He growled, almost shoving you to the floor. Resting on your knees, ignoring the way the hard wood dug into you, you looked up at him waiting what he was going to do. "Do you remember your safe word?"
"Red, Daddy," You breathed, voice nothing but a whisper.
"Right."
You nearly pouted when you didn't receive praise before reminding yourself it was a punishment. You kept silent as he began to undo the belt on his slacks, dropping the expensive leather to the floor with a loud clack from the buckle. He unbuttoned them and slid the zipper down, keeping a cold gaze on you the entire time until he pulled his already hard cock from his boxers.
You paused, watching as he wrapped his fist around himself, slowly jerking himself off in front of you.
"Well?" He snapped, making you look away from his beautiful cock.
"Wh-What?" Before you could even register, there was a sharp sting across your cheek followed by a sharp crack. Almost immediately, you felt yourself gush into your panties as you mind became fuzzy.
"Disrespectful little slut," He snarled. "Am I expected to suck my own cock?"
"N-No sir...sorry Daddy," You whispered, licking your lips before scooting closer as you reached for his cock.
"No hands," He sighed before you could touch him. "Use your mouth only."
"Y-Yes sir..." You whispered, opening your mouth wide to take the head of his cock in.
You slowly took more of him in, using as much saliva as you could to make it easier. It dripped down your chin onto your hands that were clenched in your own pajama pants. He fished his hand through your hair again and tilted his head back in a sigh as you took about half of him in. He hit your gag-reflex and you went to move back he stopped you by tugging your hair to put you back in your place.
"You tap out if you need to," He said, dropping the angry glare he had and loosened his grip to stroke your head. "Alright?"
The second you met his eyes and nodded that you understood, the deadly grip was back and his eyes were on fire. Violently, he was yanking your head towards him to force his cock down your throat and past your gag-reflex. You choked immediately, eyes filling with tears. He held you there for a second, groaning as he felt your throat spasm around him with every choke you went through.
As quickly as he did it, he pulled you off again and you gasped for air — a string of spit still connecting your lips with his cock. Before you could gather all your breath, however, his cock was down your throat again.
This time, he used his hips to fuck your mouth — using you to get himself off with no care to how you choked and cried around him. Mindlessly, you reached up to clutch onto his pants tightly. The action made him slow considerably and he carefully watched you. Meeting your eyes, he scoffed, continuing on as if he hadn't stopped to check on you.
"Dirty fucking slut," He snapped. "You're drooling everywhere. You've got it all over me, yourself. You know how much these pants cost, hm? And now they're soaked."
Typically you would apologize, but with the way he was shoving his length in and out of your throat, you were unable to. He was right, though, there was spit dripping down your chin and onto the floor, creating a puddle.
He groaned suddenly, pausing sheathed inside you to feel the way you choked around him. You struggled to get air properly, tears making it impossible to see him clearly. You continued to hold onto his pants for comfort and security as you began to slip further and further away. Noticing the change in your demeanor, how you became more pliant, he pulled out of your throat, making you choke and cough. His grip in your hair relaxed and he ran his fingers through the tangled locks. Though his touch was gentle, he still had those cold eyes.
"Pl-Please punish me more, Daddy," You begged, your throat raw from the brutal fucking.
Taehyung scoffed, backing up a few steps until he dropped himself onto the couch. With one hand, he began to jerk his wet cock off while with the other he began to undo his button-up shirt. With the sleeve of your shirt, you wiped off the excess cum on your lips and chin as you watched him pleasure himself. His head hit the back of the couch, a moan breaking from his lips.
"Even my hand is better than your fucking throat," He scoffed, chuckling at the way you deflated in front of him. "What are you gonna do about that, huh?"
"Wh-Whatever Daddy wants me to," You replied.
He finished unbuttoning his shirt and he paused in his stroking to pull it off and toss it away. Next, he lifted his hips to shove both his pants and boxers off of his legs. Spreading his legs, he used one hand to grip his length and the other to reach between his legs and cup his own balls. He hummed in pleasure, slick sounds from your spit on his cock filling your ears.
You were absolutely soaked, your panties sticking uncomfortably to your core as you sat on your knees before him.
"Stand up," He ordered, which you scrambled to do. You stumbled slightly, your legs had begun to fall asleep. Taehyung chuckled cruelly at your struggle, merely watching you as you swayed on your two feet. "Now strip."
Quick as lightning, you pulled your shirt off — revealing your bare breasts. He commented on the fact you weren't wearing a bra, making you flush as you pushed your pants and panties down until they pooled around your ankles on the floor.
"Look at you, you're actually dripping down your thighs," He teased, making you shift in embarrassment at being caught being so aroused. "You really are a slut."
"Y-Yes Daddy, I'm sorry..." You whispered, slightly shielding yourself by folding your hands in front of yourself.
"You want to be a good girl, right?" He asked.
Your head jerked up immediately and you nodded. "Yes, Daddy! I do!"
"Then come over here and sit on my cock," He let his member go, relaxing into the couch as you stumbled over to him.
You straddled his lap, holding his cock steady as you positioned your aching hole over his tip. You realized you hadn't been prepped, hesitating with his tip resting against your slit. Taehyung regarded you carefully, watching as you struggled to think of what to do. Your mind was racing, thoughts muffled and for a second, you attempted to bring yourself back to the surface. Before you could, however, you were being tugged into Taehyung's chest.
"Daddy!" You cried, eyes rolling back in your head as he sunk three digits into your little hole. It burned, making you writhe, hiding your face in the crook of his neck.
"Stupid little girl," He scoffed, sloppily working his fingers in and out of you. "Can't even figure out how to prep yourself huh? Need me to do everything for you?"
"I-I'm sorry Daddy..." You slurred, feeling you drool onto his skin slightly as he abused your g-spot. "'S just so fuzzy..."
"Mmm, I know baby," He cooed, kissing your shoulder so softly you nearly missed it. In a flash, he was pulling his fingers out of you and forcing you to sit up properly again. "Now sit your little cunt on my cock."
Your breath stuttered out as you did as you were told, your eyes crossing as you bottomed out completely. You froze there, your walls spasming and clenching around his member uncontrollably.
"Suh-So good...Daddy..." You whined. "So deep."
"Already losing it?" He asked, gripping your hips to keep you steady on top of him. "My fat cock is almost too much for you isn't it? Makes you lose your mind. Look at you, you're drooling. Such a stupid slut over cock."
"'M a stupid slut," You repeated, resting your hands on his shoulders for leverage as you eagerly began to bounce on his cock.
You were so wet, you could hear it as you fucked yourself on him. Skin slapped against skin and the sound mingled with your moans. Taehyung groaned every time you sunk down on him, hot pussy enveloping him and squeezing him impossibly tight.
"I-I...Can I cum, Daddy?" You mewled, eyes rolling back in your head as the pleasure began to crest in that oh-so familiar way.
"I guess..." Taehyung sighed, sounding almost bored. "But you won't stop until I cum. I don't care how fucking sensitive you get."
"Th-Thank you Daddy," You cried, freezing atop him as you ground down — grinding your clit against his pelvic bone. It was the push you needed, trembling as you came around him. You stopped to catch your breath, blinking blearily as you attempted to come down.
"I didn't say you could fucking stop," Taehyung growled, slapping your cheek so your head snapped to the side.
"S-Sorry Daddy..." You winced as you began to fuck yourself on him again, feeling sensitive after your orgasm. You were determined to be a good girl though, to get him to forgive you, that you desperately began squeezing your walls deliberately around him to pleasure him more.
"Fuck that's good..." You keened under his barely-there praise.
You angled your hips, finding your g-spot with practiced ease. You whined, tossing your head back as you continued to abuse the spot. Your body was covered in sweat and your hair clung to your skin irritatingly. You could feel another orgasm rising and you eagerly reached down to circle your clit, sending you into another shaking orgasm. You dropped your head onto his shoulder as you rode it out, whining out 'daddy' as you did so.
He ran his fingertips along your back, as he gave you just a second before gripping your hips and cruelly fucking himself up into your still clenching hole.
"Daddy!" You cried, digging your nails into has fragile skin.
"What is it, baby?" He asked, tone nowhere sweet and instead condescending.
"S-Sensitive..." You complained, feeling tears prick your eyes.
He laughed, not slowly down as he continued to fuck you. "I told you I don't care. You're just a toy for me to get off on."
His words had another wave of arousal flashing through you, making you clench tightly around him as you gushed. Taehyung chuckled. "You're creaming all over me, dirty girl."
"Daddy..." You sobbed, wrapping your arms around him as you felt another orgasm coming onto you.
Suddenly, everything rolled and you found yourself on your back with Taehyung pinning your thighs open. He gazed between your legs, watching his own cock force itself inside your tight slit.
"Fuck...you can barely even take me," He breathed, his bangs clinging to his forehead. "But you have to take me, isn't that right? Because good girls take their Daddy's cocks nice and deep until they gush, huh?"
"Yes Daddy," You replied, eyes rolling back in your head as your orgasm crested once again.
This time, Taehyung came with you. His cum flooded your cunt, fucking it out of you as more replaced it. He rode out his orgasm, keeping your thighs pinned as they trembled and attempted to close against the onslaught of overstimulation.
Before long, he was slowing to a stop but kept his cock buried in you. Releasing your thighs, he leaned over you and met you in a tender kiss. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, holding him close.
"You took it so well, babygirl," He whispered, sitting up. Taking you with him, he allowed you to cling to him and hide your face in his shoulder. He laughed softly as you began to sniffle but it wasn't cruel. He ran a gentle hand up and down your back as you began to cry. "What is it baby? Overwhelmed?"
You didn't reply, only nodding your head as you continued to hold onto him. You didn't cry for long, your tears drying up quickly at the help of his comfort.
"You know I love you right?" He asked, voice muffled against your skin.
You sniffled, nodding your head. "I love you too, Daddy."
"Still lost, sweetheart?" He asked, smiling when you nodded. "We'll just sit here until you come out of it. I'm right here."
You sat like that for ages, taking deep comfort in having his arms around you after fearing you would never have him again. You couldn't bring yourself to let him go, needing him to stay with you and whisper sweet nothings and I love you's.
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Although Taehyung and you had made up, you still felt the gaping hole that was left by Jungkook’s absence. You laid in bed late at night, staring at pictures of him on your phone. Some were candid and others were selfies with him grinning happily.
You could feel your eyes growing heavy with sleep which was cut short by an incoming phone call. Jungkook's name flashed on the screen and you nearly dropped your phone in your rush to answer it.
"Hello?" You asked, trying to shake away the sleep in your eyes.
"_-_____..." He sobbed, making you sit up so quickly your head spun.
"Kook? You okay?" You asked.
"I...I don't care if you're lying, ____. I miss you so much...I love you so much," He choked out, coughing slightly as he grew more worked up. "Y-You can continue lying to me j-just please come home."
"A-Alright I'll be there in a minute, Kook, alright?" You breathed, waiting for him to murmur his confirmation before hanging up.
You took the opportunity to text Taehyung as you got ready.
To: Taehyung [12:58AM] Where you are?
From: Taehyung [12:58AM] Had to stay late for work. Why?
To: Taehyung [12:59AM] Jungkook called me crying. I'm going to head over there.
From: Taehyung [1:00AM] Alright. Thank you.
You wondered why he was thanking you but disregarded it in favor of throwing your shoes and jacket on.
After calling an Uber, you quickly dashed to the penthouse, anxious and scared of what you would find. Unlocking the door with shaking hands, you walked in to hear Jungkook crying from the bedroom.
"Jungkook!" You cried, rushing to where he sat on the edge of the bed.
"_____," He pulled you into a hug, holding you tightly. "Baby I'm so sorry!"
"It's okay Kook, I forgive you," You whispered, breathing in his comforting scent.
You pulled back, meeting those teary doe-eyes. Unable to stop yourself, you pulled him in for a kiss; gripping the baby hairs at the base of his neck as you did so.
You pulled back, meeting those teary doe-eyes. Unable to stop yourself, you pulled him in for a kiss; gripping the baby hairs at the base of his neck as you did so. His hands coming up to hold your waist, bringing your body closer against his own.
He moaned softly into the kiss, pushing up the hem of your shirt until you pulled it off. He wasted no time in unclipped your bra, eagerly discarding the offending material to cup your breasts. Breaking the kiss, he instead enveloped your nipple in his hot mouth. You gripped his hair as he swirled his tongue around the bud.
His other hand was not idle, he slid it into the band of your pants and into your panties. You gasped, tightening your grip in his hair as two digits found your entrance which was just beginning to leak your arousal. He switched his mouth to the other nipple, leaving the other to harden as the cool air touched it.
Jungkook's experienced digits worked your cunt, forcing you to get wet enough for him to slide two fingers into your entrance. He kept the fingers buried inside, finding your g-spot easily before suddenly pulling out and using the wetness to swirl over your clit until the bud was hardened in full arousal.
You were panting by the time he pulled his fingers out, popping them in his mouth with a moan as his eyes rolled back.
"You taste like euphoria," He whispered, quickly yanking your pants and panties down until you kicked them away. "Get up here."
"Yes Sir," You whispered, doing as you were told.
He smiled fondly, tucking a strand of hair behind your ear before stealing another kiss from you. After pulling away, you quickly stripped himself of his clothes. His cock was half-hard and he moaned as you took it in your hand.
"Spit in your hand for me, kitten," He whispered, groaning as you did as you were told.
Using your spit-slicked hand, you began to stroke him slowly. Squeezing from the base to the head, you worked him to full hardness easily. He leaned back on his hands, watching your pretty hand jerk his cock. Precum began to bead at the tip and you couldn't stop yourself from leaning down and catching it on your tongue. Jungkook cursed at the feeling of your tongue circling his tip, dipping into the slit there to taste more of his precum.
"You taste so good, Sir," You whispered, batting your lashes at him.
"Go ahead and suck me off," He gathered your hair in his hand, keeping it out of the way as you swallowed the head of him.
His hips jerked, that part of his cock especially sensitive. You didn't focus too much time there, not wanting him to cum too early. You took him deeper, up to that pesky gag-reflex, pulling back before you could choke on him.
"Good girl," He praised, groaning as you bobbed your head in time to your sucking.
While you were pleasuring him, he decided to return the favor. Bent over his lap as you were, it didn't take much for him to maneuver you into straddling yourself over his face. You felt your cheeks burn hot at the embarrassing position but didn't have time to dwell on it when he was licking a fat stripe across the creaming wetness on your folds.
Your moan vibrated around his cock, making his hips jerk at the stimulation. His lips found your clit, sucking the hard bud into his mouth as you ground down against him. Pulling back slightly on his cock, your swirled your tongue along the head of him which was received with a gasp. You quickly dropped back down, pushing past your reflex until you choked around him. Spit bubbled from around your lips, coating the base of his cock and his skin. Wrapping the had not supporting your weight around the base, you used the spit as lubrication to stroke what you couldn't easily take.
Jungkook's tongue found your entrance, sliding into the clenching hole and moaning at your taste. He swallowed all the delicious juices you had for him, using his thumbs to spread your folds open.
"Pretty cunt," He growled, licking your exposed clit repeatedly until you were trembling. "So sensitive."
He didn't stop supplying tender licks and kisses to the throbbing bud, even as you began to whimper with an impending orgasm. Jungkook could feel his own orgasm rising to surface as he felt your clit throb under his tongue. He pulled back, smirking when you whined at the denied orgasm. Your entire cunt pulsed violently, your entrance clenching around nothing.
You doubled your efforts sucking his cock, taking him even deeper into your throat. Your eyes watered as you coughed but it was worth it to hear the way Jungkook cried out.
Realizing he was going to come soon, he went back to playing with your sensitive clit. You sobbed as he swirled his tongue around the bud, pulling the hood back so it was completely vulnerable to him.
Taking the head of him in your mouth, you used your hand to stroke the rest of his shaft. His whole body froze beneath you, muscles going taut as his cock throbbed rhythmically in your hand. The first splash of cum on your tongue made you jump, taking your by surprise but you quickly swallowed it down ready for more. He continued to cum into your mouth until he finally relaxed, riding out the aftershocks as you swallowed the rest of him down.
Pulling off his cock, you sat up and placed your hands on his chest.
"Pl-Please make me cum, Sir," You begged, still tasting the tang of his cum on your tongue.
Jungkook leaned up just slightly, taking your cunt into his mouth. He licked everywhere he could, suckling upon your clit and sliding his tongue as deep as possible into your entrance. You were trembling, eyes rolling back as you ground your hip — riding his tongue to completion. He moaned against you, teeth just barely catching your clit — finally setting you off.
You whole body trembled as you cried out — the orgasm strong and leaving you breathless. You sobbed out his name, your nails digging into his chest, catching his nipple. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed his cock twitch at that but you were too absorbed in the way he continued to eat your cunt as you rode out your high.
Finally, you couldn't take anymore, and you slumped to the side — falling off of him.
The two of you laid there, cuddled together as you caught your breath after the amazing orgasms you gave each other.
The sound of the door had you both looking up, Taehyung's heavy footsteps pounding down the hallway. He didn't even bother to take his shoes off judging by the sound.
"You were right, _____," Taehyung panted, a boxy grin on his face. "Soomin and Daehoon have been stealing information from various companies for months. They had an entire plot to just break us up."
"What a relief," You breathed. "N-Not the plot b-but you know...that you found out."
"How did you find out?" Jungkook asked.
"They're both blacklisted from being matched," Taehyung placed a paper down, leaning down to kick his shoes off obviously not willing to discuss it any further at the moment. "Now, to celebrate the good news..."
You giggled as he loosened his tie while clamoring onto the bed.
He leaned over you, pressing a kiss to your lips and then to Jungkook's lips.
"Shall we show our babygirl how much we appreciate her?" He asked, making Jungkook grin and nod.
It was almost incredible how much stamina Jungkook had, having just recovered from his orgasm and was already ready to go again. Taehyung leaned back as Jungkook began to gently touch your body — still sensitive from just playing with Jungkook.
The elder stripped his clothes as quickly as he could, making you giggle at the sight.
"I love you so much, baby," Taehyung whispered, kissing your lips quickly. "Think you could take me now?"
"Yes please," You whispered, eagerly spreading your legs.
"Fuck, you're so wet," He whispered, sliding the head of his cock through the mess between your folds. "Did Jungkook make you cum good?"
"So good..." You sighed, eyes fluttering when the head of his cock caught your clit.
He grunted as he began to push into your entrance. There was a slight sting but your walls had relaxed from your orgasm that you had no problem taking him. Your body sagged against the bed as he quickly bottomed out.
Resting his hands on either side of you, he started a slow pace — just enjoying the feeling of having you around him again. Your mouth fell open, thighs beginning to tremble in overstimulation every time he sunk in and dragged across your g-spot. His pelvic bone met your clit every time he sunk inside and you could already feel another orgasm rising.
"I'm gonna cum," You warned, meeting Taehyung's eyes as you held your thighs open for him.
He doubled his pace, the sound of your skin meeting growing louder. He watched you carefully, keeping eye contact as a silent moan tore out of you. You tossed your head back as you came, clenching around him tight as vice.
"Fuck, fuck, fuck," He groaned, watching as you came beneath him. "Coming so fuckin' good for me, baby."
"So pretty when you cum," Jungkook whispered in your ear, making you shiver.
You abandoned your grip on your knees to cling to the bedding. Your hands were shaking, your fingers weak from how much strain your muscles were under from being tensed.
"I-I...I want...fuck..." You couldn't get your words out, eyes rolling back in your head as Taehyung continued to fuck you.
Jungkook chuckled, sitting up on his knees and wrapping his hand around his cock. "Look at our dumb little baby. Can't even form a proper sentence."
"F-Fuckin' pathetic really. Such a slut for cock, she doesn't even care that she turns stupid," Taehyung added, their words making you clench pathetically around his cock.
"All she can think about is having a fat cock stuffed in her little cunt," Jungkook cooed, sliding his hand between your legs to find your clit. "Or being able to cum while stuffed full."
"Go ahead baby, cream on my cock again for me," Taehyung ordered, angling his hips up to slam against your already abused g-spot.
Immediately, you were forced into yet another orgasm. You swear, no one could ever make you cum harder than the two of them. You would never be able to go back after this, completely ruined and only able to get off on your two doms.
"There's a good girl!" Jungkook praised, finally abandoning your clit to let the sensitive bud recover.
"Daddy please—" You gasped, reaching up to place your hands on his chest.
"What is it, babygirl?" He asked, finally slowing to a pace that allowed you to catch your breath.
He ground into you, stirring your insides in a way that made you sob. "I-I wan-want you both in...in me."
Taehyung and Jungkook both froze, cocks twitching in interest.
"Can you take us both, kitten?" Jungkook asked, meeting your eyes to make sure it was really what you wanted and not just your fucked-out mind.
"Yes I..." You whined, grinding against Taehyung to ease the painful arousal. "I want you to make me take it. Please, fuck me too, Sir!"
"Dirty slut," Jungkook hissed. "Sit up then.”
Both you and Taehyung moved so you were straddling the elder. Jungkook reached between your thighs, fitting two fingers inside you beside Taehyung's cock. The extra stretch stung but it quickly vanished. Taehyung moaned as you became even tighter than you already were with the addition of fingers.
Jungkook worked up to four fingers, fucking them in and out of you while also stroking Taehyung's length. Your head rested against Taehyung's shoulder, as you moved back against his cock and the digits. Before long, Jungkook removed them, using the juices on them to slick up his own cock.
"Stay still," He snapped, applying a sharp smack to your ass when you eagerly ground backwards in hopes to meet him.
Ever so slowly, with as much care as he could possibly muster, he began to sink into you alongside Taehyung. The feeling of the other man's cock against his own was euphoric and he tossed his head back with a shout.
"You're so so tight," Jungkook sighed, working himself deeper inside you.
He paused with every whimper you made. Whenever you reached back to stop him, he allowed you the time to adjust. Your entrance stung and you knew you'd be sore in the morning but you couldn't bring yourself to care as he finally bottomed out.
You were fuller than you had ever been in your entire life. Before they even had the chance to move, you were coming again. Coming around two cock stuffed inside you was the best yet. Without even having to touch your clit, you were gushing, soaking both you and Taehyung beneath you.
"God," Jungkook breathed. "You really like this, huh?"
"Who knew you'd like being stuffed on both of us? If we'd known this we'd have done it sooner." Taehyung chuckled, making you flush.
You felt like a slut in that moment — in the most exhilarating, arousing way possible.
"Please fuck me," You begged.
Neither man said anything, setting a pace immediately. Taehyung began, shoving his cock deeper inside you in one smooth thrust. Every time he sunk in, Jungkook pulled out and vice versa. They were able to hit every delicious spot inside you like that, making you cry out in pure heaven.
If you could die where you were, you would— coming hard with the two of them brutally fucking you.
"I'm already close..." Taehyung choked out.
"M-Me too," Jungkook sighed, brows furrowed.
"Please don't stop!" You cried, clinging tightly to Taehyung in front of you.
"You know..." Jungkook chuckled, a sadistic noise that had you on edge immediately. "If you like this, maybe we should stuff another hole, hm?"
Before you could question him, you felt his thumb circling your second hole. Your eyes widened, your mouth falling open as he easily pushed the digit past the tight ring of muscle. Even with one finger, you felt even fuller than you already had.
It took no time for you to be coming a final time. You squirted, crying out uncontrollably as the both of them were set off as well. Both of them gushing inside you was incredibly, it leaked past both their lengths to make a mess beneath you.
When you collapsed onto the bed, you could feel your hole clenching around air — stretched open so much that you weren't able to close properly just yet.
Both men collapsed beside you, none of you caring about the fact you had to clean up the mess. All you truly cared about was the way they wrapped you up in their arms, sharing kisses between the three of you.
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whatiwillsay · 4 years ago
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t 2017 playlist analysis
Alright folks, whether you’re newly indoctrinated in the swiftgron faith, or have been here for a while, buckle up because boy is there crack coming your way.  It should be important to note that these are of course reaches and should be taken with a grain/pound of salt.  What you’re about to read is a lyrical analysis of a playlist made by Dianna on her private spotify, titled ‘t 2017.’  Therefore, the only real ‘evidence’ we have to make connections lies in the lyrics, and the general vibe of the playlist.
The following lyrical analyses stems from the idea that Taylor and Dianna may, and I strongly say may have hooked up, possibly around late 2016, or early 2017 (right when this playlist was made).  If you haven’t already, I highly suggest reading Cam’s Swiftgron timeline that she has meticulously and laboriously outlined for all of us, so you have more background knowledge on any reaches/connections made.  Also listen to her pod for extra serotonin cause I know you bitches want it.  Anyway, I digress– I’ll be pointing out only the songs/lyrics that I think are most relevant (and to make this post shorter, I apologize in advance) but I urge y’all to take a look at each songs’ lyrics to see for yourself, because some of these songs seem loud af.  Ok happy reading!
Genesis- Grimes
My heart, I never feel I never see I never know Oh, heart And then it falls And then I fall And then I know
This verse talks about the unpredictable nature of love, you never know when those feelings could come rushing in, and there could be days when you feel like you’re never going to love again– gives me cowboy like me vibes with that particular sentiment.
Home and I know Playing the deck above It’s always different I am the one in love
Ok I don’t think this one needs any explanation other than tis the damn season.
1998- Chet Faker
We used to be friends We used to be inner circle I don’t understand What have I become to you
This verse is giving me major the 1 vibes– “rosé flowing with your chosen family” kinda thing.  Relationships (yes, even hookups) are hard, especially when you go from knowing someone like the back of your hand, to a being a mere memory.  It’s even harder when you run in the same social circles and are bound to bump into each other.  What are you to do with all those unresolved emotions/lack of closure?  I just find this a bit funny because two years later at SNL, Dianna is actually considered Taylor’s ‘inner circle’ at the afterparty.  
Drops- Jungle
When you’re so high, you When you fall from the sky, you So come down from the clouds Come down on me
I’ve been loving you too long
I’ve been loving you too long
This song sort of encapsulates the feeling of love that is intoxicating, one might even say addicting.  In that sense, I’m getting major Style vibes, in that they keep coming back to each other because of that high and intoxicated love.  More than anything, this verse reminds me of Clean, and of course Dianna’s infamous tweet, “withdrawals…clearly we had fun” (see Cam’s swiftgron masterpost/timeline for receipts).
Ritual Union- Little Dragon
Straight off the bat, this song gives off major infidelity vibes (something Taylor has been obsessed with as evidenced by Evermore, and of course Babe which btw had a lot of social media signalling/shenanginas happening in 2017/2018).  Perhaps Winston was the cuck after all and we did get a swiftgron hookup? 
Ritual union’s got me in trouble again I was wonderin’ of a white dress And the mistress And a spirit holding my hand!
You do the math with that one– ivy anyone?
Daniel- Bat For Lashes
Daniel when I first saw you I knew that you had a flame in your heart And under our blue skies Marble movie skies I found a home in your eyes We’ll never be apart
I only have two words to explain this verse– Begin Again
But in a goodbye bed With my arms around your neck Into our love the tears crept Just catch in the eye of the storm
With this verse in particular, there’s this sense of a heartbreaking parting of ways in a relationship.  It feels eerily similar to This Love– “your kiss, my cheek, I watched you leave.”  There’s also a mention of a storm, and we all love a good old storm in the swiftgron universe (Clean, DBATC, CIWYW).
Can’t Do Without You- Caribou
I swear to god these are the only two lyrics
Can’t do without
I can’t do without you
Make of that what you will.
Touch- Shura
This was the song that had me fully convinced that swiftrgon might’ve hooked up again in the recent past.  It’s so fucking loud and I did audibly gasp when I read these lyrics.  I’m so tempted to post the entire song because honestly every lyric fits their narrative almost to a t, but I’ll try putting the loudest lyrics here.
There’s a love between us still But something’s changed and I don’t know why And all I wanna do is go home with you But I know I’m out of my mind
This love is good, this love is bad.  This slope is treacherous, I like it.  If the hookup did happen, it’s clear that it’s a bit hard to just pick up immediately from where you left off.  Of course there’s still a lot of love there, it just takes time for those years to melt away.
I wanna touch you but I’m too late I wanna touch you but there’s history I can’t believe that it’s been three years Now when I see you, it’s so bittersweet
Ok this is basically swiftgron’s story right here, I mean come on?!?
I’m running down a dream like Tom Petty, I’m a heartbreaker But then you changed up a relationship, I’m mostly bankrupt There’s a new kid on your block, I gotta hang tough
Cowboy like me anyone?
Yeah, the effect of touch hands is like a miracle How is it you’re halfway across the world when I’m still feeling you? Just a touch of my love, just a little bit Ain’t no love without trust, we gotta deal with this
Gives me treacherous and wonderland vibes– “I’ll do anything you say if you say it with your hands” and “you searched the world for something else to make you feel like what we had.”
iT- Christine and the Queens
I feel like this song gives off major Reputation vibes– controlling your narrative/ ridiculing what other people thought you were, etc. 
With it I become the death Dickinson feared With it I’m the red admiral on his ship And I raise with infants for my coronation I’ve ruled over my all my dead impersonations
‘Cause I’ve got it I’m a man now
Sunday Love- Bat For Lashes
This is a literal weekend hookup anthem (major tis the damn season vibes) and is also one of the other songs that convinced me of the swiftgron hookup.  Again, please look at all the lyrics and deduce for yourself and freak out like I did, but I’m putting the loudest lyrics down.
See her in blue eyes Numb and shining In the face of strangers In the city lights Where he’s climbing Cupid’s diving And I know that she’s come To spend the night
She is in my bedroom Now I can’t fight 
Blue eyed lady coming to your house to fuck you. Ok Dianna, real subtle with that. I’m joking but I snorted when I saw this lyric.
I see her in every place I go Sunday love is so cold Even though I’m falling apart I want Sunday love in my heart
You could call me babe for the weekend cause it’s the damn season.  Also “I see you everywhere the only thing we share is this small town.”
Sweet Talk- Jessie Ware
There’s never any doubts when i need you It’s just that you can always make me feel like I am slipping in way too deep And let the shadows hope to hide or break the dreaming, dreaming of us
The vibe of this song is that there’s someone who always pulls you in because they know exactly what to say.  They found wonderland and got lost in it. 
Dear To Me- Electric Guest
When it’s bad Feels like I don’t know which way I should go But over time I come back and remember The one thing that I know
You’re dear to me and I know 
I know I’ve tied so many songs to ttds, but I guess it’s all the more reason to claim that one for swiftgron nation?  This verse reminds me of  “the road not taken looks real good now, and it always leads to you and my hometown.”
Got It Bad- Leisure
This song was added much later to the playlist on Taylor’s birthday in 2019. All other songs were added early feb of 2017.  With this song, I don’t get much except cowboy like me vibes.
Got our different ways with the same old payout Had our own dreams with the same old outcome Had a bad extreme and the same old break down Worked it to the bone with the same old habit
Et voila, that’s the end! I know this was super long so thanks for sticking through.  Again please note that these reaches were made because we are a little biased through a swiftgron lens.  It’s very possible that Dianna simply likes these songs and put it on a playlist, but let’s be real, gays practically communicate through spotify.  This is not fact and not proof for anyone to hound Dianna or invade in her or Taylor’s personal life, this is just for swiftgron fun.  That said, I’m personally inclined to believe that something did happen between Taylor and Dianna in 2017 possibly.  That’s all I have to say, thanks!
submission⬆️⬆️⬆️
ANON THIS WAS AMAZING YOU JUST MADE MY MORNING!!!
you should make a gaylor blog if you don’t have one already we NEED more of this content!
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perseusjackson-jasongrace · 4 years ago
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Hey...I am AN ABSOLUTE jercy TRASH like A HUGE JERCY FAN and I was wondering if you could like a one shot of jealous percy...I have seen a lot of jealous jason fanfics but never really saw a jealous percy!!! Thank you and I LOVE YOUR BLOG SO MUCH...
Hello darling Anon!! Adore that you're #jercytrash (is there really any other way to be????) and I'm so happy you enjoy the mess of content i have🥺💙all the heart eyes
Anyway I loooovvveeeeeddddd this prompt and this is evident by the very many words I couldn't help but write! I do hope you love it as much as I loved writing it☀️please excuse any mistakes it's like 3am here and Ciara be tired as hell
Masterlist
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"Are you coming to the party tonight?"
"Gods no," Percy shivers, face pulling into a look of distaste.
"Why not I heard Annabeth is gonna be there," Leo's eyebrows waggle, earth eyes sparkling.
He wants to laugh, to cry a little too. If only that is the blonde he is so infatuated with.
"Nah bro those parties always end up much wilder than they need to be and nine times out of ten they're shut down by the cops."
"That's half the fun Jackson!" Leo's smile widens.
"I'm good thanks, my idea of fun is sitting here playing Playstation and gorging myself on M&Ms."
"Will you at least promise to come on the trip this weekend?"
"I don't know man," He shakes his head, "I've got a psych test to study for and there's like three assignments due by the end—"
"Oh excuses, excuses Jackson you haven't gone out once since we started. It's gonna be winter break soon and we won't see each other for at least a month." Those brown eyes are puppy wide.
He sighs, half-ready to give in, "Who's gonna be there?"
"The usual gang. And Jason finally gets to come this year! His dad is on a business trip so he isn't spending the weekend for once."
Percy's ears get hot and he hopes they don't look flushed, "Oh that's nice I guess. If you leave me alone tonight I'll come on the trip."
Leo's answering whoop is enough to make him laugh. When he collapses on the couch, after waving goodbye to his friend, there is a warmth blooming in his chest.
Three hours, five packets of M&Ms and a stream of curse words at the TV later, he finally decides to head to bed. But as he's shoving on a pair of sleep shorts there's a knock at his door. He frowns, considers ignoring it but his mind whirls with all the possibilities.
What if someone got hurt? What if someone needs his help? What if someone is....oh gods he doesn't want to think about it. He brushes his fingers against the wooden headboard, rubs at his head, grabs his elbow and then he takes a deep breath and opens the door.
"Peerrccccyyy," A slurring, smiling Jason Grace stumbles into him.
"Jason?" He grabs hold of the blonde's arms and pulls them both into his apartment, "What are you doing here?"
"I came over because–" Pearl white teeth flash, "Wow you're so pretty." Those golden hands grab Percy's chin, pulling their faces together until there is nothing but tension and breath between them.
"What are you doing?" He swallows.
"Has anyone ever told you your eyes look like emeralds glistening at the bottom of a river?"
"Uh no can't say they have," He wants to laugh but Jason's lips are so close and his hand is still on Percy's face and oh gods he needs to move before he does something he shouldn't.
"Have we kissed before? No I'd remember that." Eyebrows scrunch, "I think you have a beautiful mouth."
"I think—" He inhales sharply as Jason's fingers dance along his collar bone, "I think we should get you to bed."
"Aw," Full pink lips pout, "But we are having so much fun."
"I think we'll have more fun when you're sober."
The blonde giggles, "I'm not drunk silly. I only had like... fifteen shots of vodka."
"Jesus Grace how are you even standing?"
"When you're this tall it takes forever for the liquor to do its thing and you need a lot of it otherwise it all goes to your toes and you never get drunk."
Jason is frowning again and all Percy wants to do is kiss the crease in his forehead and pull him closer. Instead he tugs him by the hand and guides him to the bed.
"Where will you sleep?"
"I'll take the couch." He pushes the blanket aside and let's the blonde fall into the sheets.
"Are you sure? You can always stay with me?" Those blue eyes are bright and big and so full of, of, of... "I promise I won't kick you. I stopped doing that in first grade."
He can't hold in his laugh this time but when he recovers enough to reassure his friend he'll be fine he is greeted by the peaceful sight of a sleeping blonde. He shakes his head softly, allowing himself a moment to take in the scene. Tangled white sheets, golden hair, soft deep breathing, a tiny splattering of freckles, and the wonder of tomorrow carried on the wind that stirs the chiffon curtains. This moment will live within his soul for the rest of his life. Of this, he is certain.
***
The treadmill beeps incessantly indicating the end of the session and the end of Percy's day. He's about ready to pass out from exhaustion and he couldn't be happier. The days are long and blurry and he would do anything to escape the weight on his chest. A blue-eyed, golden-haired weight. He snorts at the innuendo. If only the actual person was sitting on his chest, entertaining each other. But no it's just the feeling, the emptiness, the lack of anything weighted. His eyes shudder closed as he steps into a red-hot shower and let's the memories of his last meeting with the blonde wash over him. There is a time, mere months ago, where Percy would have scoffed at these feelings. Would have told himself it was ridiculous and stupid and there were much more important things to be focusing on than some boy. But every interaction with Jason Grace feels like the middle of a fireworks display, feels like crawling into the sun, or falling off a cliff only for the water to catch you. Every interaction feels electric. And he cannot help but overanalyse each touch, smile, lingering look. Are they for him, or for the world? Jason had always been easy. He could make you feel like the most important person in the world just by glancing at you. It was beautiful, magnetic, but it also meant Percy never really knew if anything they did was genuine. If the extra squeeze when they hugged was as a friend or something more. If those blazing eyes over the campfire was a trick of the light or... But tomorrow it's their annual WastedWinter trip and at the very least he can look forward to a few nights of bad decisions and sinful delights.
The day dawns bright, cloudless, and icy cold. He breathes in the fresh winter air and lets the sting travel through his lungs. There are few things as lively as the winter morning air. With a look through his apartment window to see the birds flying and the wind shaking the trees awake he ducks into the shower and gets ready for the trip.
At exactly eleven a knock echoes through his apartment. He clicks submit on his assignment and races over to throw the door open.
"Good morning Jackson! You're looking especially radiant this find day."
"Must be the seaweed face mask I put on last night."
"Oh," Annabeth Chase frowns, "And here I thought you got down and dirty with someone."
He snorts, stepping aside to let her in. "No such luck Princess, I'm down and out on laundry."
She smacks his arm, grey eyes sparkling, "I hope you know you're driving for most of this."
"Is this because I'm the only one who can be trusted to get us there in one piece,"
She gives him an incredulous look and then turns her nose up, "No Jackson it's because the rest of us want to get wasted and you don't drink."
"Ah, glad to know I'm of some use to the group."
"Oh you're plenty useful," She winks.
He laughs at that, mind flashing to the fling they had at the start of their undergraduate years. Both had realized pretty early that life was leading them in different directions and it would be better to stay friends. But tumbling in the sheets with her had been fun while it lasted.
"Alright who's in our car?"
"We got me, you," She starts tapping her fingers, "Leo, Jase and Rey,"
"Great so I'll be talking to myself for most of this trip." He rolls his eyes.
"Why do you say that?"
"Well Leo and Reyna will fall asleep about five seconds after we start driving and you and Jason will talk incessantly about gods knows what, which leaves poor old me."
"We will not!" Annabeth's ears go pink as she glares at him.
"Mhmm okay Princess."
"Shut it." She grumbles, shoving him.
Some minutes later they're all piling into the car: Percy driving, Reyna in the front, Leo at the back on the left, Annabeth in the middle and Jason on the right.
"Hello everyone ready to roll?"
"I didn't get nearly enough sleep last night," Leo mumbles and then he's fluffing his pillow against the door and closing his eyes.
"What was he doing?"
"Engineering project," Jason grins, "He forgot and had to sit up all night to submit before we left."
"I'm also out," Reyna throws up an uncharacteristic peace sign and settles into her seat, eyes already shut.
"And her?" He asks, a little sore his right-hand passenger is ditching him for dreamland.
"No idea," The two blondes shrug.
Percy refrains from rolling his eyes and puts the car in gear. With a final check to make sure everything is in its place he pulls onto the road and starts the long journey to Lakeside Lodges.
The music is soft, some pop song that everyone is raving about, and the city is alive with the lunch hour rush.
"Jason," Annabeth starts, "What are you doing for the structural—"
Percy tunes them out, content to let their university talk become background noise. He glances at the rear-view mirror and sees shining blue eyes staring intently into serious gray ones. He looks away, focuses his attention on the road.
Sometime later they leave the city behind, the sound of cars and sirens and endless people fading into calmer, more lilting noises. The quiet of the empty road, and the crackle of the radio, and the soft chatter from the backseat. He cannot help but feel at peace, feel as if the world is balanced just right.
Annabeth giggles, catching his attention and he watches in the mirror as Jason lays a hand on her thigh and laughs into her shoulder. Quickly he adverts his eyes, swallowing the sinking feeling and turns the music up to distract his thoughts.
"Percy," At tap on his shoulder. "Pers?"
"Yea what's up?" He smiles and it feels like surgery with no anaesthetic.
"Did you hear what Jase said? It was such a stupid joke I said you'd appreciate it."
He shakes his head, "Wanna tell it again?"
"Nah," Jason mumbles, "Won't be as funny the second time."
"Aw come on Jase," Annabeth pouts, "For me?"
He watches from the mirror as those blue eyes light up, "What do you mean for you? I thought I was telling the joke for Mr Driver?"
She giggles, shoving at his arm, "That's what I mean."
Percy isn't sure he can't take anymore of their whatever it is so he clears his throat and asks them for a pack of Sour Patch Kids.
"Oo I love those!" Jason gasps, rummaging around in their snack bag. A packet drops into the cup holder and he thanks the blonde.
"Jase throw them at me, let's see if I can catch!"
The six gummies shoved in his mouth turn bitter as he watches the two giggle and joke and share space. By the time Jason throws the last gummy Annabeth is practically in his lap to catch it. Percy wants nothing more than to get out of this damn car. His skin is hot and he's sure his blood is about two degrees away from boiling. The stones in his stomach are stacking up like rock scultputres. Pretty but destructive. Nothing can get passed but nothing can leave either. And the heavy, sinking feeling certainly doesn't seem to be going anywhere. Finally though they arrive at the lodges and after check in he practically vaults himself out of the car and disappears into a bathroom.
There staring in the mirror he can see his misery reflected back at him. His green eyes are stormy, and there seems to be a permanent crease in his forehead. His mouth is down turned and his hair is in a state of complete disarray. Tugging at it when he's frustrated is an unbreakable habit.
He stays in the little bathroom for longer than he thought because he is sharply pulled to the present by a rap on the door.
"Percy?"
"Coming," He sighs. He straightens his back, attempts to tame his hair, and plasters a smile on his face.
"You good?" Frank frowns when he walks out.
"Yea sorry, drank one too many slushies."
His friend laughs, "Tell me about it. I think my tongue is going to be stained red for a month."
"I mean that's your fault. Blue is clearly the superior slush."
"Blue is the worst flavor," He scrunched his nose, "It isn't even a flavor. They somehow managed to give colour a taste."
"Well red is nothing but iced medicine."
"Hey guys," Frank waves their friends over, "Percy thinks blue slushies are the best flavour, care to tell him he's wrong?"
There is a pause amongst them and then everyone is talking at once.
"No,"
"I mean I kind of agree."
"Green is obviously the best."
"There is no way, it's red all the way."
"What about-"
"Okay!" Annabeth shouts, "Let's settle this WinterWasted style,"
Leo rubs his palms together, a gleam in his eyes.
"Everyone who says red stand on one leg, everyone who says blue stand on anything but the floor."
They all shuffle around, pushing each other over and generally causing chaos but soon they're in their spaces. Everyone observes the room.
"That's four to red and three to blue." Leo announces.
Jason, Percy and Hazel are standing on the couches and counters. Piper, Annabeth, Leo and Frank are on one leg in the middle of the lounge.
"Yes! We won." Frank smirks, "Alright losers you know the drill."
"No!" Percy yells, "We're missing a person. If Reyna joins us then we're even and we go into death round."
"Okay Jackson, I see you can't take the loser title sitting down so we'll get Reyna's opinion. But if she chooses us you guys have to drink and jump." Frank's black eyes sparkle with mischief.
Percy narrows his own, pinning his gaze on his friend, "Deal Zhang."
Just then Reyna walks in and seeing the odd scene sighs heavily. "What are we trying to settle? We haven't even had lunch yet."
"First of all it's six o clock so it's a little late for lunch and secondly are you Team Red Slush or Team Blue Slush?"
She scoffs, looks over them and grins, "I'm Team Purple because grape is obviously the only valid flavour."
Everybody groans, cursing her.
"Grape is the absolute worst Arellano." Leo gives her a look of disgust.
"Mhmm," She simply smiles.
"Well if you had to choose between blue and red which one?" Percy asks.
She taps her head for a moment and then looks to the ceiling in exasperation, "Guess I'll choose Red."
"Hell yes!" Frank whoops, laughing as the blue team groans. "Guess who's doing the BigFalls jump tonight!"
Percy grumbles but there is a light in his eyes and as he swats away a hand ruffling his curls he decides it was worth it, even if his friends are wrong.
That night they all stumble to the GreatCliff, an area that had witnessed many a fall, kiss, and confession. Most importantly a place that held some of their favourite memories.
Percy, being the only fully sober one, constantly counts his friends, making sure none of them have gone over-cliff or landed in a ditch somewhere. Soon enough they make it to the clearing and lay down the picnic basket and their towels.
"Alright losers," Piper smirks, "You ready for this?"
Hazel pouts, "Do we have to?"
"Yes!" Annabeth exclaims, blonde curls bouncing as she jumps up and down in excitement.
Jason whispers something in her ear and she dissolves into giggles. Percy looks away, refuses to let their closeness ruin his night, weekend, forever.
"On the count of three," Frank starts.
Reyna takes off her sarong and settles down on the blanket with a smirk.
"One..."
Hazel bounces nervously.
"Two..."
"Don't get hypothermia," Piper laughs.
"Three!"
Jason, Hazel and Percy are sprinting, racing for open air. With a yell they jump and then they're free falling, flying, screaming.
Percy hits the water in a neat dive, barely flinching at the icy temperatures. When he comes up for air the world is noisy with laughter and cheering. He waves to his friends at the top of the cliff and checks to make sure his fellow jumpers are okay.
Hazel is grumbling about being fully sober again and Jason's teeth are chattering but there are smiles on their faces and stars in their eyes and Percy knows the weekend has just begun.
They all swim up the stream and climb all the way back to the cliff where a small fire is crackling and their friends are dancing sporadically to a bawdy ukelele tune being played by Leo.
"Oh gods," Jason groans, "How are we already at this stage of the night."
"Whatever Pipes put in the punch is going straight to our lungs," Annabeth giggles.
Reyna shakes her empty glass in confirmation and request. Soon everyone is hopping and bouncing and singing badly around the fire. Percy settles into the blanket and watches his friends. They are full of life and magic and he can't help but tear up at the love he has for them. Even Reyna is joining the revelry, laughing bright and beautiful at something Hazel says.
His attention catches on the twirling figure of Annabeth. And then Jason grabs her mid spin and pulls her to him.
"Dance with me,"
"Of course Mr Grace," She bows.
They draw together, his hands on her hips, her head on his chest, swaying slowly. Annabeth mumbles something and Jason's shoulders shake with laughter. She looks up, their eyes meeting. Percy can't stand to watch anymore. Abruptly he gets up, throws the blanket aside and stalks into the trees.
"Pers?" Someone calls. He doesn't bother to respond.
He hears scattered conversation and then footsteps are running towards his retreating figure.
"Percy wait!"
He manages to hold in a groan as he realizes who followed him.
"Pers slow down, what's going on?"
"Nothing," He grits, "I just needed some air."
Jason laughs, "We are literally in the middle of a forest how much more air do you need?"
They're still stalking through the woods, dead leaves cruching under their feet.
"Come on, what the hell happened? You just up and left?"
Percy stops in his tracks, whips around to face the blonde, "I'm surprised you noticed."
"What's that supposed to mean?"
"You've been so wrapped up in Annabeth all day I wouldn't be surprised if you forgot to breathe unless she told you to." He spits.
Jason's face crumples, "What the fuck are you talking about?"
Percy instantly regrets his words but he can't take them back, "Just nevermind. I'm going to the cabin. Be careful walking back." He turns to walk away but a golden hand on his arm yanks him back
"Um no, you're going to explain right the fuck now because this isn't like you at all."
"Isnt like me?" He laughs sharply, "What isn't like me?"
"This," Jason motions up and down, "You walking away, being angry with us? What is going on?"
"I'm just tired," He sighs, "Can we drop this?"
"No Percy. I've seen you tired. I've seen you so exhausted you couldn't even see straight. I've seen you sad and angry and frustrated and happy and excited and calm but I have never seen you so... volatile. So just tell me—"
"I'M JEALOUS OKAY!" He yells, "I. Am. Jealous."
Jason reels back, lightning eyes blinking, once, twice, widening, "You're jealous?"
"Yes," He breathes, "And I'd appreciate it if we stopped talking about this."
"Oh," Is the blonde's intelligent reply.
"Yea oh," He scrubs at his face, running a hand through his hair.
"You're jealous of me? If you liked Annabeth why didn't you just say so? I wasn't flirting with her, we were just being dumb. I've had a few too many tequilas and she's hilarious and gods I'll back off I swear I didn't mean to hurt you. I'll even hype you up to her if you—"
"You are such an idiot," Percy growls and then he grabs the blonde by the t-shirt, pulls him in and sears their lips.
Jason tastes like the sky, like winter breezes and lightning storms and home. He tastes like home.
When they break apart Jason is gasping, mouth opening and closing.
"Do you get it now?"
"You- and I- and we- and Anna- and just- and-"
"Are you speechless because you don't know how to let me down easy or because I took your breath away?" Percy winces.
He needs to know. Needs to understand if this is a one-sided thing, if he's been dreaming up their dynamic all these months.
"Do that again," The blonde breathes.
A slow smile spreads across his face and then Percy Jackson cups Jason Grace's cheek and comes home at last.
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duchessfics · 5 years ago
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Midnight Disclosure
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(https://friendly-deatheater.tumblr.com/post/152731371953)
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(https://alainashuffman.tumblr.com/post/66522632737/sarah-paulson-in-piggy-piggy)
Billie x Fem!Reader x Audrey
Requested by Anon: hi! i was wondering if you could you write some fluff for billie x reader x audrey? 🥺👉🏻👈🏻 i’ve gotta a lot of tough stuff going on and on top of that the world is going crazy, so my mental health isn’t doing very well. maybe r feels like a burden and doesn’t really talk about her mental health or problems because she doesn’t want to bother anyone so she avoids billie and audrey. you are one of my absolute favorite blogs!! take as long as ya need writing this!! ☺️💕
Warning(s): Mentions of anxiety and depression, description of a panic attack, Mentions of Covid-19 
Summary: On the eve of current world events, the reader is overwhelmed but doesn’t want to bother her girlfriends with personal struggles. However the truth eventually emerges and they offer support in a way that she hasn’t experienced.
Word Count: 4347
A/n: Tbh, I’m a little nervous to publish this just because I know Covid-19 is everywhere at the moment and it’s frightening. But I thought this could help with those of us who may feel overwhelmed or are struggling to fight inner demons. I am fortunate enough that even though I’m currently laid off from work I am in a relatively stable environment. And my heart goes out to everyone who is struggling right now.
With the time I have now I’m trying to write more and publish some content where if nothing else you can get an escape for a couple minutes. I’ll also be reposting others’ works too. If you are struggling know that I care about you and am willing to listen even if you just want to be anonymous. Wherever you are in the world I’m sending positive thoughts/vibes/prayers your way. 💖
“Y/n, darling!” Billie calls out from the kitchen. 
In response you get up from your spot on the couch and walk over to where she is. When you enter the luxurious kitchen, the medium gives you her million dollar smile and curls her finger in a beckoning motion, showing off her fresh set of acrylic nails—cherry red of course. 
You smile back, cheeks warming as you come within close proximity. Then she leans in and pecks your lips before asking you, “Were you busy, sweetheart?” You shake your head and ask, “Why?” Billie takes a step back and picks up a slip of paper off of the countertop while replying, “I wanted to ask if you could run out and buy a couple things we need?” 
You take the list from her and scan over the items before returning your gaze to her chocolate brown eyes and asking, “Is Audrey around to come with me?” The blonde gives you a sympathetic smile and lifts one of her hands to cup your face before she answers, “She’s rehearsing her lines for the next couple days of work. And I have a conference call with a couple of producers in ten minutes.”
 You look down and nod in understanding, but feel bummed that you’ll be going alone. However Billie uses her hand to guide you to look at her before soothing, “When you get home, Audrey and I will give you something special. Ok?” 
The way she smirks at you makes your ears burn and a small giggle slips out of you before you reply, “Ok.” Her hand falls away from you and she gives you another brief kiss, letting her plump lips press against yours a little longer than before. Then Billie says with a wink, “I’ll see you later, babygirl.” 
You tell her goodbye and gather your purse and keys before walking out to the multiple car garage. Then you climb into Billie’s “old” sports car. In reality, the car isn’t that old, but she bought a new one and has basically given you this one. You climb in, turning the car on with a low growl and speed off to one of the local grocery stores…
You assumed this would be an easy in and out task, however as you pull into the parking lot it is jammed packed and you struggle to find an available parking spot. 
Maybe...there’s a really good sale? But you have never seen the supermarket this busy. 
Finally you find a space to pull into and step out of the car, list in hand. While walking towards the entrance, people pass by and have their shopping carts filled to the brim with cleaning items, toilet paper, canned goods, and water. Beyond the stuffed shopping carts, you also notice that each person’s facial expression is tainted with worry. 
In the midst of looking around, you nearly get run over by someone pushing their cart towards you. Luckily you back up out of the way with a gasp as they say on the phone, “They’re running out of everything. I’ve never seen so many empty shelves. You better come here soon or it will all be gone.”
Without you consciously realizing it, your heart rate has increased and you take shallow breaths. But you look to the ground, trying not to notice the numerous other people around you. 
You can do this. You only need three things: eggs, milk, and a bottle of Audrey’s favorite brand of fruit juice. No big deal. 
But when you enter the bustling building, a small whimper escapes your throat when you see the massive line of people checking out. Each cart is packed with items and the employees rush around trying to appease the masses. 
You don’t realize you’re frozen in place until someone brushes past you, letting out an annoyed huff. 
Maybe you should get more? You could call Billie—except she’s in a conference call. Should you call Audrey? She’s working too. You can just grab a couple extra things. Deep breaths. You can do this. 
You grab a shopping cart and wipe the handle with a sanitizing wipe before beginning to navigate through the packed aisles to pick up the items…
By the time you return to the car, your breath is stuck in your throat and your eyes smart with tears. You manage to unload the grocery bags of items into the car’s trunk before you get into the car and break down into tears. 
Yes you bought the three items. But in your panicked state you also filled your cart like everyone else. And you weren’t fast enough to even get any toilet paper or sanitizer. Why do you always fail when it’s most important to perform well? 
Your hands shake in fear and you know you just spent much more than you intended, but you’re so scared. Everyone is rushing around and things are flying off of the shelves so you panicked. As you cry and gasp for air, the thought crosses your mind to call your girlfriends. 
But they’ve never seen you like this. And you don’t want to bring them down. They’re so busy right now. You don’t want to burden them with your irrational thoughts. So you do your best to pull yourself together on the drive home.
When you pull into the garage and turn the car off, you make yourself take a couple deep breaths, collecting your emotions enough to get past them. For now you only pick up the three items you were sent out for and leave the rest to bring in when they’re gone. You were out for at least an hour, but hopefully they won’t notice.
You walk in to see Audrey pacing the length of the kitchen while listening to someone on her phone. She huffs and crosses her one arm over her chest, not giving you more than a stiff smile and honestly, you’re grateful. 
You slip off your shoes while she scoffs before arguing, “I don’t see why we are considering not filming at this point. I have been thoroughly rehearsing this role and have plenty of auditions and other projects after this.” 
Meanwhile you hear the news playing in the background from the living room.
 As she keeps pacing, you quickly put the items in the fridge, listening to her continue, “We’re already behind on production. If we don’t keep going now this will be a complete loss for everyone involved. Yes, I’m sure that I would take that risk to finish filming.” You silently leave the room and peek your head into the living room where Billie stands with her back to you smoking a cigarette while watching the news.
Before you can get any more anxious, you clear your throat and softly murmur, “I-I got everything on the list. I’m just going to lie down and rest for a bit.” She lets out a puff of smoke before partially turning towards you, but her eyes remain on the TV as she mindlessly replies, “Alright, thank you, sweetheart.” By the time you finish mumbling, “You’re welcome.” she’s back to watching the news. So you back into the hallway, your shoulders sagging as you hear Audrey’s frustrated words and the news.
Once you make it to the bedroom, you shut the door behind you and make a beeline for the bed. Then you flop back on it, letting out a sigh. 
However, you shoot back up and mutter, “Shit.” 
How could you be so stupid? 
You rush over to the bathroom and turn on the sink tap, wetting your hands before scrubbing them with soap. After humming happy birthday to yourself two times you rinse your hands and dry them off, just finishing when your phone rings. 
As you walk back to the bedroom, you pull your phone out of your pocket to see it’s your sister. So you press the answer button, sitting on the edge of the bed as you say, “Hello?” 
She greets you before asking, “Have you been watching the news? They’re saying the coronavirus is spreading especially quick in LA.” You let out a sigh, trying not to panic again as you answer, “Yeah. Things are pretty chaotic, but I just went grocery shopping so we should be good.” 
In response she warns, “Just be extra careful. This whole thing is getting worse and worse. Try not to go out.” You assure her you won’t and tell her you love her before saying goodbye. Then you fall back against the bed and snuggle under the covers. 
Maybe a nap will help you. 
But just as you get into the foggy daze of sleep, your phone dings. So with a groan of annoyance you pull out your phone to see your mom texted you, 
Did your sister call? 
You quickly reply, Yeah. Then you toss your phone out of arm’s reach before burrowing back under the covers.
However, your phone dings again, interrupting your quiet time. Maybe if you ignore her you can just text later. But after hearing 5 more dings, you toss the covers back with a groan and pick up your phone. That’s when you see your mom has texted you five times. 
She’s really concerned about you in LA. 
I don’t know if you’ve been watching the news, but this is all they’ve been talking about. Everyone’s saying they’ve never seen a global pandemic like this.
And LA is one of the hot spots. Did you go out and get essentials? Think through what you’ll need for the next couple weeks and go fast. It may all be gone soon and who knows how long it will be sold out.
Also try to do some things even when self-isolating. We all know how you get in situations like this.
Are you reading any of this?
Your eyes well up at that last text. Maybe you are just a burden to the people around you. 
Before she decides to call, you sniff and swipe away the tears that threaten to fall before texting back, 
Yeah. I got stuff today. 
As soon as you send it, the message says read and three dots show up on the screen. Your stomach clenches with nerves as they continue to bounce. You are positive that she’s going to send you a long message and sure enough a wall of text appears:
Don’t let yourself sleep these days away. Spend time cleaning the house. Exercise. Read that book I sent you. Don’t spend all day on your phone. That’s a complete waste of time. Don’t stay up late at night. Eat healthy, keep a regular schedule. Do some knitting. Spend time cooking. Go outside. This is not a time to stay in your pajamas and watch TV all day. Don’t fall into bad habits because of a lack of self awareness and self discipline. If you do this time will be incredibly disappointing and wasted. These are just a couple small things. I love you and only want what’s best for you.
By now you feel that earlier heaviness resettling on your chest and the pressure of her words just feel like too much right now. So you turn your phone off and set it aside before sliding under the covers and succumbing to the darkness…
At some point you must fall asleep, because you’re awakened by a soft, British voice saying, “Y/n, darling. Are you awake?” You shift under the blankets and they get slowly drawn back to reveal Audrey smiling down at you as she comments, “I don’t know how you fall asleep with all of those covers pulled over you. You’re like a little mole.” 
Your eyes squint as they adjust to the light and you shrug your shoulders, still feeling quite drowsy. But her face gets serious and her eyes narrow before she asks, “Is something wrong? You look upset.”
Your heart clenches as you realize how your eyes probably look puffy and irritated. Luckily, you come up with a quick excuse, saying, “It’s just my allergies. They flared up for some reason.” 
Her disposition goes back to normal and she nods in understanding, making you inwardly let out a sigh of relief. Then she says, “Well, I came in here to tell you that dinner is almost ready.” So you assure her you’ll be out in a few minutes and freshen up before joining your girlfriends at the dinner table.
As the three of you eat, Billie says, “I was talking to my producers and it looks like we’ll have to delay filming after this trip.” You feel guilty for being relieved, but can’t contain the small smile that forms on your face when the medium looks at you. She smirks back and purrs, “I wonder whatever I will do with all of the free time after that?” Your cheeks heat up at her insinuation and she gives you a wink, leading you to look down to hide your grin.
However, the moment is broken by Audrey stating, “Well I still plan to travel and film. This whole thing is ridiculous.” 
Your smile fades at her words and Billie looks to the actress before teasing, “Awe come on, Audrey. Don’t you want to spend time with y/n and I?” But Audrey scoffs and sternly replies, “I have worked my ass off for this role. So unless everything shuts down, I will be traveling to finish filming.”
Your eyes widen at her determination, but you keep quiet, looking down to your food. On the other hand, Billie doesn’t seem fazed, assuring her, “I’m sure it will all be fine, darling.” before she picks up her glass and finishes off her wine. 
You try to finish your plate of food, but the anxiety you feel makes your stomach unsettled. All of this turmoil makes you feel like your anxious thoughts are eating you from the inside out. But you don’t say anything. Why trouble them when they have enough on their plate?
The rest of the evening goes by in a blur of watching TV and even though you sit next to your girlfriends, your mind is miles away stuck in a loop of anxiety about your girlfriends, your family, your friends, and even the world. These fears continue to run through your head and get bigger to the point that even though you lie in bed you can’t fall asleep. 
The faint sound of Billie and Audrey’s even breaths is soothing and you’re happy to see them both fast asleep with peaceful expressions. Normally you don’t catch them sleeping, but whenever you do they both always look so beautiful. 
Just being able to watch both women makes your heart feel like it’s going to burst. You love them so much. 
The way Billie flirts and compliments you all of the time especially when you’re down on yourself. Or how she showers you with gifts and will always hold you close. 
And Audrey. Sweet Audrey is always there to cheer you up and notices anytime you don’t seem to be doing well. She even did today. And if you ever question how essential you are to this relationship; she’ll immediately share how essential you are to them. If something happened to either of them in all of this—
That’s when you come back to reality and feel the tears streaming down your cheeks. Before you can get loud enough to wake them you slip out of bed and leave the bedroom. The first place you walk to is the kitchen where you get a glass of water, sniffling through your tears. 
Then you step over to the living room and take a seat on the couch, quickly finishing off the water before setting down the glass. While you feel anxious enough to stay awake, your body is also worn down from the panicked state you have been in all day. So you play a game on your phone. The minimal strategy is enough to distract you and as you begin to feel your stress and anxiety fading you hear from behind you, “What are you doing out here little mouse?”
Even though you recognize Billie’s voice, you still gasp and whip your head around to see her standing in the doorway with slightly mussed hair. But she still looks breathtaking. 
You look down and shake your head while muttering, “Nothing.” 
That makes her brows furrow and she comes closer as she replies, “It doesn’t seem like nothing, babygirl.” Then walks around the back of the couch to sit beside you. At first you turn to look away, but Billie softly says, “Hey,” then she brings her hands up to cup your face before guiding you to look directly at her. However, her brows are slightly furrowed when she asks, “Have you been crying?”
While she keeps your head from turning away, you can’t keep eye contact as you reply, “I-It’s stupid. I’m just being dumb.” The medium gently shushes you, skimming the pads of her thumbs along your cheek while murmuring, “Whatever is bothering you isn’t stupid, y/n. And you aren’t dumb. Please tell me what’s bothering you, darling. You can tell me anything.” 
While your mind scolds you for being weak right now and screams that she doesn’t really care, your exterior cracks and, after swallowing enough to feel like you can speak, you barely whisper, “I’m scared.”
Billie scoots closer, still keeping your face cradled in her smooth hands as she asks in a voice still husky with sleepiness, “Oh, honey. Did Audrey or I do something to upset you?” 
Right away you shake your head and reply, “No, never. It’s just…when I went to the grocery store today it was packed with people rushing around and grabbing things.” 
Then you take a deep breath before shakily continuing, “All anyone could talk about was the coronavirus. A-And I saw store employees being yelled at by multiple people. And when I was in the cleaning section there was this elderly woman looking for toilet paper—”
Your voice catches and you get teary-eyed as you whimper, “A-And the shelf was completely empty. P-People were pushing and shoving and she was just trying to pass. She looked so defeated and it—it broke my heart. That’s someone’s grandma and if someone did that to my grandma I would be so upset.”
You begin to shed tears as you continue, “Then when I got home, my sister and mother both contacted me about the coronavirus saying what I should do. Even though they were trying to be helpful I-I got overwhelmed. And just watching the news while knowing you and Audrey are traveling—”
You let out a choked sob before rasping, “I’m just so scared, Billie.” 
While you can’t see her face due to your blurred tears, the medium brings her hands away from your face to gather you close to her while murmuring, “Oh, sweetheart.” In response to her warm hug, you wrap your arms around her and cry into her shoulder. Then you say between gasps, “I-I told you I’m being dumb.” 
Billie strokes one hand up and down your back in a slow motion, softly shushing you while soothing, “You’re not being dumb, y/n. These are scary times. And I’m sorry we never asked about the grocery store or how you were feeling.”
After a while, you feel yourself begin to settle and merely let out soft hiccups whilst nuzzling into the bend of her neck. Her smooth, soft hair gently caresses your forehead and cheeks and she keeps quiet besides softly shushing you, holding you close to her. 
You feel spent as you mumble, “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean for all of that to come out.” 
Billie guides you to look at her and wipes away the stray tears on your sensitive, puffy cheeks as she murmurs, “You have no reason to be sorry, y/n. I sometimes forget what a kind, tender heart you have. You care about others around you so much it’s no wonder everything feels overwhelming right now. But that’s nothing to be embarrassed or ashamed about.”
Normally people would call you a “worry wart” or just tell you to stop being anxious, but you’ve never been told that it’s due to caring about others. You do care. And being anxious doesn’t have to be bad or make you a bad person. It just took someone rephrasing what you have been feeling in a way your own brain wouldn’t allow.
You’re not the problem. 
You give Billie a wobbly smile and whisper, “Thank you, Billie.” She smiles back and leans towards you, running her nose against yours as she replies, “You’re welcome, babygirl.” 
You keep quiet for a moment, feeling better. However, you straighten up and while you wish this wasn’t nagging at you, you need to know. So, you ask, “Will Audrey really still travel? Or you? It seems so dangerous to travel at the moment and I don’t really want to be left alone—”
Your girlfriend silences your worries with a soft kiss before soothing, “It’s ok, y/n. All of my travel ended up getting postponed. So, I’ll be home with you the whole time.” 
That confirmation leads you to let out a breath of relief and you nod. Then Billie loosens her hold on you and suggests, “You should tell Audrey how you feel.” 
Her idea makes you stiffen up and you look down to the lacy hem of Billie’s baby doll nightgown as you reply, “I don’t know…she talked about working so hard for this role and I don’t want to be the selfish girlfriend and take that away from her.”
The medium chuckles, making you look to her face and she says with a smile, 
“Now y/n, you know how dramatic Audrey can be at times. I know without a doubt if you told her how you feel she would reconsider. And, if nothing else, she wants to hear from you, honey.” 
She has a point. You bite your lip, pondering her words for a moment before slowly relenting, “I guess I could say something to her…”
Billie’s grin grows and she gives your cheek a small pinch before assuring, “I know you can do it. And I’ll be with you the whole time.” So, you return to your bedroom, holding Billie’s hand the whole time, and when you step into the darkened room, you see Audrey nestled under the covers breathing deeply.
Billie leads you over to the side of the bed the actress is closest to. Then, with one encouraging nod, she releases your hand and you slowly climb up onto the bed. Once you’re on, you place a hand on the her shoulder, gently nudging her while whispering, “Audrey?” 
She shifts in her sleep and turns to face you, opening her bleary eyes while she drowsily slurs, “Yes, darling?”
As soon as she shows any semblance of being awake you wrap your arms around her middle and pull her close to you, making her squeak in shock as you begin to plead, 
“Please don’t leave LA, Audrey! Please! I know you worked hard to get this role, but I don’t want you to get sick or be separated from me and Billie. Just please stay home. I know I’m being selfish, but I love you both so much and don’t want anything to happen to you. I’ll do anything you want to get you to stay home. Anything—”
While her senses are still fogged over from sleep, she lets out a low chuckle, hugging you back before she croakily soothes, “Hey, hey it’s ok, sweetheart.” making you stop your pleas. 
Then she pulls back to see your face when she asks, “You love us?” That’s when you register that you said those words. 
While you haven’t said those words out loud before, you don’t regret saying them. 
You nod, your cheeks warming as you look to her and shyly answer, “Yes. I-I love you, Audrey.” Then you look to Billie who still stands beside you both and say, “I love you too, Billie.”
Both women smile and Billie murmurs, “We love you too, y/n.” Then Audrey presses a kiss to the corner of your lips before huskily purring, “We both love you so much, darling girl.” You sheepishly smile and turn to face her again, sharing a brief kiss on the lips. 
Then she looks to you and apologizes, “I didn’t mean to frighten you earlier. While we’ll be tying up a couple loose ends the next couple days, it looks like any further production has been delayed. So I’ll be here. Ok?” While you feel bad, knowing how much Audrey loves acting, you can’t help but feel relieved. You nod and reply, “Ok.”
Billie starts to join you both on the bed, so you shift to let her have room. However, she takes your wrist and teases, “And just where do you think you’re going, babygirl?” 
You look to her smoldering gaze and slowly answer, “My side?” The medium chuckles and murmurs, “Oh no, that just won’t do. You can stay in the middle so both of us can love on you.” Her sultry tone makes you blush, and you nod at her instructions, staying put while both women move to keep you in between them.
Once you’re settled, Audrey spoons you from behind and Billie snuggles into your front. For the first time today, you feel the weight completely lift off of your chest and within minutes your eyes begin to get droopy. 
Billie tucks your hair out of the way while soothing, “If you start to feel anxious again, you can always come to either of us.” Then Audrey kisses just behind your ear and murmurs, “Whatever happens we’ll get through this together, love.” You relax into their arms and nod, sleepily saying, “Thank you.” And even though you still have feelings of being worried and depressed, you begin to sense a pinprick of hope in the midst of the tumultuous unknown.
Tagged @marilynroselleprentiss​ @saviorinsilk​ @chokemepaulson​ @versonstar​ @find-me-a-constellation​ @cordwliagoode​ @psychobitchtess​ @midnight-lestrange​ @mysweetdelia​ @venablesbitch​ @peachesandlesbians​
Let me know if you would like to be tagged in later works!
Please remember: you matter, you’re important, and you add beauty to the world. Sending love. 💖
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sugarvamgar · 4 years ago
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important stuff about the future of my art and this blog
a clarification i think i should make: i’m not a fanartist, and probably never will be. i like drawing fanart, but i’m not that great at coming up with ideas for what to draw, but i’m very good at ocs - i’ve been doing them the entire time i’ve done art. they have always been more important. my characters and stories are on the forefront for me, and always have been.
when i go silent for long amounts of time on here, i am drawing, but most of it is original content, like stuff for robotism - a game that i need to keep more under wraps until we have more solid content as proof of concept (and a bigger team to help work on it), and a webcomic that will come out much sooner than the game will. with that said, i Do have a lot of original content that isn’t connected to anything that i’m (currently) planning to make some type of media, so i could post it. i’ve been anxious about posting oc content, because i didn’t think anyone would be interested. i’ve learned that this in part is true - if you only post designs with no proper content, like comics and text talking about them, nobody will be interested. if i stay anxious, and only post the design refs, and do nothing else, i’m not going to get anywhere. my plans in life are very reliant on building a base of people who are interested in what i do, and i need to actually work on that. i need to focus more on being less afraid to post content of my characters and stories, and to properly brand myself as a storyteller. this isn’t a goodbye to fanart. i’ll still draw stuff for the things i love! but do be aware, i’m going to be making a switch to dedicating this blog to the original content that i’ve spent years making. --- in related news, im planning on posting stuff to youtube, like speedpaints and like, possibly tutorials. general stuff where i’m just talking. probably bring on friends too! videos are a lot easier to search for than singular pieces of art, especially when most of what you draw is original content. go to where the audience is, yknow? might get an instagram or twitter despite how much i Hate that idea. no matter how much i dislike it, i can’t just wait for people to come to me. i’ll probably get used to using them once i start. i also want to interact with you guys more! i’m not entirely sure what i’m gonna do for that yet, but i might reopen that old discord server i had. not sure yet, we’ll see. if you’ve read this post, feel free to show that you saw it with likes or replies or somethin because it lets me know you all are Lookin. i would appreciate it! thank you for reading, have a nice day <3
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lanzhanlanzhan · 5 years ago
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This is a Wang Yibo Appreciation Post
Okay, first of all, whoever was responsible for even considering Wang Yibo as Lan Wangji ought to get an award. I mean look at this boy
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Who looked at him and thought, "Yes! A perfect Lan Wangji!" It boggles the mind. In fact, one of the funniest things I found when the series was first aired was UNIQ fans belatedly realizing that Lan Wangji was being played by Wang Yibo. The whiplash must have been something because the gap is just unreal.
I remember that back when news came out that there would be a live action adaptation of MDZS, not a lot of people were behind Wang Yibo being casted as Lan Wangji. I would even admit to being one of the naysayers, and if I delve deep into this trash bin of a blog, I would probably find something I said last year that was along those lines. Mind you, this was in stark contrast to how people reacted to Xiao Zhan; most people liked him, thought he looked great as Wei Wuxian, and he just got a lot of approval on the get-go. The promotional posters that came out though just did not really do Wang Yibo justice. As Lan Wangji, he did not look the part, he seemed quite young, who even was Wang Yibo, or if you knew Wang Yibo, like really, Wang Yibo? And so on and so forth. 
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The great reveal though is that apparently, Wang Yibo is the kind of guy you just have to see in action. The moment I got into him playing Lan Wangji? I was sold. I was so sold I would willingly eat my shoe for everything I ever said about CQL casting back in 2018. That face, the look? Picture perfect. His manner, his restraint, the way he conducts himself in fight scenes? It was sheer genius casting a dancer for the kind of grace required to pull off the esteemed Hanguang-jun. I love Wang Yibo's Lan Wangji and knowing what I know now, if you give me another actor to play Lan Wangji, I would stab him in the eyeballs, I am not kidding. Don't give me anyone else other than Wang Yibo.
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Now, Xiao Zhan has proven time and again that he understands Wei Wuxian, and the great thing is he is articulate about it. I think it's pretty well known that this boy makes entire speeches and writes legit essays when asked about Wei Wuxian. We love that about him, and I think this is also why he is so popular with the fans. We don't get as much of that from Wang Yibo, but much like how it wasn't until we saw him in action that he proved why he was a fitting Lan Wangji, the same could be said here. He does understand Lan Wangji. How do we know? Because it just shows. I find that appreciating this boy is in seeing him just do things. I remember how it was when, with each episode that passed, people just started noticing how Lan Wangji—poker face extraordinaire—was behaving in each of his scenes. We went, "Was that--? Holy shit, yes, it is?? How is this actor pulling off these micro-expressions? How is it that we are actually getting emotions from Lan Wangji??"
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This went on up until a lot of us slowly realized, "You know what? This is a really good Lan Wangji we have here."
The Untamed also gave us a lot of promotional and behind-the-scenes content, so let's talk about that, too. There is something refreshingly genuine with Wang Yibo that I don't think I often see in many celebrities. It could be because he's young, but that just makes it more impressive how well he is performing on-screen. Out of costume though, he doesn't seem to have many filters, and it is such a riot following him and listening to the kind of shit he says in interviews (and taking note of how the "more adult" Xiao Zhan reacts to them).
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Besides, a drama with two guys as leads? This could have easily been a recipe for clashing egos. While whichever actors playing Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji would find themselves being called the "two male leads" of the show, the fact of the matter is, Wei Wuxian's character is defined by his actions and his convictions. He fights against something larger than himself, and in this sense he is the typical hero of a story. Lan Wangji, meanwhile, is defined by his devotion to Wei Wuxian. 
People get compared all the time, rankings are a thing, and product endorsement usually can only afford one popular celebrity as a brand ambassador. One could very easily be the actor who resents Lan Wangji's popularity being dependent on Wei Wuxian, and thus be considered "secondary" to Wei Wuxian. But instead, and despite all the wrong ways things could go, we got chemistry on screen and camaraderie behind the scenes. Wang Yibo favored Xiao Zhan and did not compete with him. It probably helped that Xiao Zhan is older (thank goodness for Asian values), but then Wang Yibo has been a celebrity for longer. Again, it could have gone badly.
I cannot stress enough how important it is to me that Lan Wangji's actor likes Wei Wuxian. It's not by any means a necessity, but a wonderful, wonderful bonus to all this—because what self-respecting Lan Wangji wouldn't adore his Wei Wuxian? We got cute banter behind the scenes, with Wang Yibo even seeming to be most partial to Xiao Zhan and generally being playful with him despite having a reputation of being cold to co-stars. He genuinely seemed to have had a lot of fun with his co-actor. I do not ship them nor do I follow RPF, but I find that them having that amiable and sometimes affectionate atmosphere does wonders for my own shipping of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji. It's like everything just feels safe and good, and my boys are happy together in all iterations of their universe. 
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I will always be thankful to these actors for interpreting these beloved characters so respectfully, especially given the nature of Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji's relationship. With the threat of censorship being a very real thing for them, I'm glad we still got the bond—and yes, love—between Wei Wuxian and Lan Wangji in the scenes they share on-screen. (Actually, I sometimes wonder if Wang Yibo's, uh, violence towards Xiao Zhan is a remnant of Lan Wangji's affection for Wei Wuxian that Wang Yibo hasn't shaken off after they end a scene, lol. What's a guy to do with those feelings, right?)
Anyway, this accidental meta was brought to you by all these goodbye posts with CQL ending. I reiterate all the "thank you's" to the cast, but really for me, my appreciation goes most of all to our unexpectedly excellent Lan Wangji. I said so much shit about him last year, but he ended up being my absolute favorite of the cast. Wang Yibo took Lan Wangji and brought him to life in a way I never thought I needed, and now holy hell, I am churning up fanfic like mad every week. It has been such a wonderful journey, and never have I more sincerely wished success for any show's actor as much as I do for this boy. I was so, so wrong about him, but boy, never have I been happier for being proven wrong.
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our-time-is-now · 4 years ago
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July 4, 2019: A 57-minute delay
(previous play)
You can find more information about the authors, translators, content warning and additional information about the plays in the pinned post on  our blog.
Thursday, 1:57 pm:
Matteo: *they have spent the night at David's and spent their morning mostly lazing about in bed* *they eventually got up, after all, showered and ate something* *now they are back in David's room* *David is sitting at his desk and is doing some research again about his new university and the courses he can take* *Matteo is lying on the bed playing with his phone* *then gets a message from Hans asking whether David and he are coming to the flatshare today because he has baked a cake* *looks up at David* Hans baked a cake and wants to know if we'll come over today... I'll tell him yes, right? Or do we have any plans today?
David: *looks up from his laptop when he hears Matteo's words and smiles* Cake sounds good... *then thinks for a moment if there's anything scheduled for today and quickly glances at the date on the laptop and then at the time with some panic* Oh crap... *briefly runs a hand through his hair in confusion* I've got a doctor's appointment in an hour... *is glad that at least he’s already showered* But afterwards I'd love to... cake I mean! *gets up and sits down on the bed to already put on some socks* *leans over to Matteo and kisses him briefly* *then grins* Maybe you shouldn't only remember the dates for birthdays and anniversaries but also the ones for the doctor's appointments...
Matteo: *nods when David says that cake sounds good* *is already typing up a response to Hans when he hears David's "Oh crap" and stops typing* What? *sits up when he hears that David has a doctor's appointment* Oh really? *then thinks for a moment and realizes that it can't be an appointment for testo and frowns* What kind of doctor's appointment? *smiles when he gets kissed because then it can't be something bad* *grins slightly* Maybe you should give me a copy of your calendar... *only says this as a joke* *would never expect that from David* Do you have to leave straight away? *quickly finishes his response to Hans saying that he'll probably be home soon and puts the phone away*
David: *bites down on his bottom lip for a moment when Matteo asks about the appointment and without looking at him murmurs* At the gynecologist... *grabs the phone from his nightstand and puts it in his pocket* *grins slightly when Matteo mentions the calendar* Maybe I should get myself a calendar in the first place... *checks the time again and shakes his head at Matteo's question* I still have 10 minutes... *lets himself fall back onto the bed and simply pulls Matteo with him* *murmurs* We definitely have to make use of the time productively...
Matteo: *nods slightly at David's answer* *hasn't really realized just yet what kind of doctor he talked about but had simply nodded* *tilts his head* You don't have a calendar? Despite all your doctor stuff? And your memory? *laughs slightly when David pulls him down with him and wraps his arm around him* *but then realizes what David had said* Hang on... did you just say gynecologist? Is that... well? *looks at him questioningly* Why?
David: *grins slightly when Matteo asks about the calendars again and shrugs* I have a more or less well-organized pile of notes with doctor's appointments... *laughs briefly* Strangely enough I've never missed one... *also wraps one arm around Matteo once they are lying down and pushes one leg between his* *nods when Matteo asks about the gynecologist* *notices that he's looking at him but somehow can't return his look right now* *therefore buries his face in Matteo's shoulder and grumbles slightly* *then pulls away again but still doesn't look at Matteo* Well... the organs and such are still there... so you have to go to check-ups regularly... besides, I need a confirmation letter for the mastectomy and the hysterectomy that everything's okay...
Matteo: *grimaces slightly because David doesn't want to look at him and because he feels stupid himself* *David still has the stupid female organs, therefore he has to go to a doctor who specializes in it* *kisses his head and hugs him a little closer* *quickly answers* Yes of course... *then thinks for a moment and thinks that it would be a little odd but that he wants to be there for David when he needs him no matter what* *therefore asks* Do you want me to come with you?
David: *at first thinks that he misheard him but then thinks that it's so typical for Matteo that he wants to support him wherever he can and that it's one of the reasons he loves him so much* *still laughs quietly and shakes his head* *looks at him, after all, and lightly runs his hand through Matteo's hair* That's really sweet but it's embarrassing enough on my own... you don't have to do that to yourself... *kisses him softly and murmurs* I'll just meet you in the flatshare afterwards and in the meantime you can make sure that Hans doesn't eat the entire cake by himself... okay?
Matteo: *tilts his head slightly when David says that it's embarrassing* Then I could come along and tell all the women who give you a look that I'm already in my 6th month of pregnancy and that I'm worried because you still can't see anything? *gives him a slightly wicked grin* That would distract them... *but then nods* No, but I understand... *kisses him again and runs a hand through his hair* *nods* I'll save you a slice, I promise...
David: *quietly laughs at Matteo's suggestion and says* If I ever want to switch gynecologists, then you're welcome to try that... *smiles when Matteo says that he understands it and returns his kiss* *murmurs to the cake-thing* Good... or two... *grins slightly and then sits up with a sigh* I have to go... *leans down again to kiss Matteo* *whines against his lips* I don't want to... you go... *kisses him again, groans quietly, straightens himself up again and reaches for the shoes next to his bed to put them on*
Matteo: *pouts when he says that he has to leave* *kisses him again and then again* I would if I could... *sits up* I'll just clean up the kitchen and then I'll leave as well... *gets up from the bed when David does and goes into the hallway with him* *kisses him again quickly* Don't let them bother you... and remember, there's cake waiting for you on the other side... *then watches him leave, goes to the kitchen to quickly clean up and to then go to the flatshare*
David: *smiles when Matteo says that he'll clean up the kitchen* Don't worry about it... *thinks that the kitchen doesn't look thaaat bad and that Laura would surely understand* *says goodbye to Matteo and, like always, has to smile slightly when Matteo stays back in his apartment and when it feels like he would just belong there* *downstairs, he makes his way to the subway and the uneasy feeling about the gynecologist pushes itself back into the forefront of his mind* *hopes that he doesn't have to wait for too long and that he can get it over with quickly*
About two hours later:
*is relieved to leave the doctor's office – on the one hand because he's got it over with and on the other because everything is okay and because the gynecologist said that nothing stands in the way of his mastectomy and hysterectomy* *pulls his phone out of his pocket and texts Matteo: WhatsApp Matteo/David: David: Hey, I'm finally done and am on my way to the subway. I guess that I'll be at your place in about 30 minutes. Is there still cake left? ;-) *then puts on his headphones, turns on music and walks toward the subway-station*
Matteo: *has cleaned up the kitchen and thrown a few of his dirty things into his backpack and made his way to the flatshare* *has eaten cake with Hans, Mia and Linn at the flatshare and Hans has naturally put two slices aside for David, which Matteo was really happy about* *has then retreated into his room and played around on his laptop* *reaches for his phone when he sees it light up* *smiles when he reads the message and replies* WhatsApp Matteo/David: Matteo: Hey, I hope everything went okay. There's still cake left, Hans put it aside especially for you :) See you soon
David: *feels his phone vibrate when he's walking down the stairs to the subway and quickly pulls it out again to read Matteo's message* *wanted to reply but then notices that his train is supposed to arrive in 2 minutes* *starts running so that he can still make it and really manages just in time* *is happy that it's not too full and that he manages to get a seat* *replies* WhatsApp Matteo/David: David: Yes, everything's okay – according to the gynecologist there aren't any concerns about the surgeries. :-) Tell our Guru thanks for saving some for me! See you soon! *sends the message but notices that he no longer has any signal and grimaces slightly* *hopes that he might have a signal at the next stop and keeps the phone in his hand to see if the message has been sent*
Matteo: *doesn't receive a reply from David* *but wasn't really expecting one* *knows that he'll be there in about 25 minutes* *puts his phone aside again and tries to get through the level before David comes back*
David: *doesn't have any signal neither on the next stop nor the one after that but instead realizes that his battery is very low* *decides to save some battery and to put his phone away – after all, it's only 5 stops until he has to get out of the train and his message isn't that important that Matteo has to immediately read it* *leans back and enjoys the music* *at some point notices the train stopping in the tunnel but doesn't think much of it at first, because it sometimes happens* *only when the train still hasn't moved 5 minutes later does he slowly start to get nervous* *takes the headphones off and pulls his phone out of his pocket again only to realize that he still doesn't have any signal* *then hears an announcement through the speakers that their train will be delayed for several minutes due to a technical malfunction* *sighs quietly and wonders how many minutes several minutes will be this time* *is annoyed that he didn't take the bike* *every now and then checks the time and his battery and eventually types a message to Matteo when it's obvious that he won't make it to the flatshare on time* WhatsApp Matteo/David: David: I don't have any signal right now, but at least you can read this as soon as the messages get sent again. My train has a technical malfunction right in the middle of a tunnel. I have no idea how long this will take but I'll definitely be late. Don't worry! *sends the message and worriedly looks at this battery which is only at 5%* *hopes to get some signal back before the battery dies*
Matteo: *manages the level but then doesn't feel like playing anymore* *turns off the laptop and puts it away* *checks the time and sees that David should be here any moment* *goes into the kitchen and takes the cake out of the fridge and puts it on the table* *pulls his phone from his pocket* WhatsApp Matteo/David: Matteo: Do you want coffee with the cake? Then I'll make some. *looks at the phone and sees that David doesn't receive the message, only one tick* *grumbles slightly and simply makes some coffee* *checks the time and sees that David should have been here by now* *grabs his phone again* *sees that his previous text still hasn't been received but texts him anyway* WhatsApp Matteo/David: Matteo: Everything okay?
David: *gets more and more nervous the more time passes* *eventually gets up and goes to the front of the train hoping to get some signal there, but his messages to Matteo still don't get sent* *notices while checking the time that he should have arrived at Matteo's 5 minutes ago and that this information has cost him 1% of battery* *tries to call Matteo but doesn't manage to get a signal for that, either* *types another message* WhatsApp Matteo/David: David: My battery is almost dead! In case you can still read this: I'm okay and trying to get to you as quickly as possible. *in that exact moment hears an announcement that the technical malfunction has been detected and that it will be taken care of as quickly as possible and that the passengers are asked for some more patience* *nervously bounces his leg and forces himself not to check the time because he's afraid that his phone will die* *hopes that it might occur to Matteo that the subway might have a problem and that he'll stay calm but he's afraid that Matteo will panic and just wants to get to him as quickly as possible* *eventually pulls his phone out of his pocket, after all, and checks the time* *can only see that he's now 20 minutes late before his display gets black and his phone turns itself off*
Matteo: *gets slightly nervous when more and more time passes and David doesn't show up and his messages don't arrive, either* *after 15 minutes he grabs his phone and googles "subway Berlin accident" but can't find anything current* *wonders if David might have walked, after all, and that it takes him longer than he anticipated* *but then doesn't understand why his messages don't go through* *realizes that he doesn't know where David's gynecologist is* *what if it's some stupid part of town and he's been mugged and his phone got smashed and he's lying somewhere and can't call for help* *doesn't even notice how he's nervously pacing the kitchen* *keeps looking at his phone* *types another text to David, even though he knows it's useless* WhatsApp Matteo/David: Matteo: Everything okay? Where are you? I'm worried *goes back to his room and grabs his laptop* *then asks himself what he even wants with it in the first place and puts it away again* *reaches for his phone again* *stares at it as if it would help turn one tick into two* *checks the time and notices that by now David is 30 minutes late* *sees several horror scenarios in his mind's eye, each one of them showing David somewhere, injured, and not able to help himself* *considers calling hospitals but then thinks that it's too early for that* *goes back to the kitchen even though that doesn't help, either*
David: *has eventually lost all sense of time and turned on his music again, resigned, but turned the volume down so that he would still be able to hear the announcements* *thinks that he can't do anything but wait and only hopes that Matteo isn't too worried* *thinks that it might occur to him to look up online if his subway is late but then remembers that Matteo doesn't even know which one he's on* *at some point remembers that Matteo's roommates are home and that they would surely calm him down or distract him* *feels like he's been in the tunnel for hours when the subway eventually slowly starts moving again* *takes a deep breath and waits patiently for the next stop – for one to see where exactly he is in the first place and to maybe be able to see how late it is* *when he can finally see some light again he realizes that it's only two stops to the flatshare and that the subway is delayed by about 45 minutes* *figures that with the two remaining stops and the walk to the flatshare it will take him at least 10 more minutes before he's finally with Matteo* *already gets up as if that would make him arrive faster* *finally reaches the stop and quickly gets off the subway* *runs up the escalator and then starts to quickly make his way to the flatshare* *jogs part of the way, finally reaches the house and rings the doorbell*
Matteo: *notices that the coffee is finished brewing and fills it in a thermos with shaking hands* *afterwards immediately checks his phone again* *sees that it's almost been an hour since David said he'd be there* *goes back to his room and ignores Hans, who passes him to probably go into the kitchen or the bathroom* *sits down on his bed once he's in his room* *stares at the wall and has a picture of an injured David in mind* *grabs his phone and googles "hospitals Berlin"* *randomly chooses one where he sees the phone number and calls it* Yes, hello... I wanted to know if someone named David Schreibner has been taken to your hospital within the last hour... what?... no... why does that matter?... I don't want you to tell me a fucking diagnosis, I just want to know if he's there... No, Schreibner, with an n... no S-C-H-R-E-I-B-N-E-R... *is so panicked and nervous and busy explaining to this stupid woman on the phone what he wants to know that he doesn't hear the doorbell*
David: *hears Hans over the intercom and gets buzzed into the house and let into the apartment by Hans* *is a little out of breath because he ran upstairs* *hears Hans: "Hello, my dear, Matteo is in his room... he seemed a little scatterbrained... just go through to his room..." and only nods briefly* *quickly passes him and goes into Matteo's room and sees Matteo nervously on the phone spelling his name* *feels a stab in his chest when he realizes with only a glance that Matteo isn't okay* *doesn't hesitate and so that he can pull him out of his concentration and nervousness calmingly says* Matteo... *takes two steps toward him and sits down on the bed* *stammers* I'm so sorry... the subway had a malfunction in the tunnel... my phone died... I couldn't reach you... *looks at him worried*
Matteo: *shakes his head on the phone and turns toward the balcony door* *hears his name and spins around* *sees David and can't even describe how he feels* *hangs up without saying another word and throws his phone aside* *only shakes his head when David explains himself* *doesn't understand a word he says right now* *has immediately put his hands on David's face, his shoulders, arms, everywhere* Are you all right? Is everything okay? *looks at him as if he could suddenly see injuries that he hadn't noticed before* I thought... *shakes his head because he doesn't even want to say it* *therefore only asks again to make sure* You're okay?
David: *feels like Matteo is way too shaken to listen to him and eventually stops his stammering* *feels how Matteo seemingly tires to feel if he's okay and simply lets him* *reaches for his hands when he seems done and tries to look into his eyes* I'm fine! Everything's okay! *grimaces slightly when Matteo starts his sentence but doesn't finish it* *can't really imagine what he thought happened but considering the condition Matteo's in it probably wasn't anything positive* *just hopes that he didn't think that he ran away again just like that and that because of the stupid subway malfunction old wounds and fears have come back again* *nods when Matteo asks again if he's okay and repeats* I'm fine! *then puts one hand to his cheek and looks him in the eyes* I'm here, okay? *has to swallow when he can still see fear and slight panic in Matteo's eyes*
Matteo: *feels his heart still beating really fast and tries to breathe to get it under control* *nods slightly when David says that he's fine* *looks at him when he reassures him that he's here* *nods again only slightly and then pulls him closer* *wraps his arm around him and buries his head in his neck* *lets himself fall to the side with David, so that they're lying on the bed, but doesn't let go* *lies with him for quite some time before he quietly says* I thought something happened to you... something bad...
David: *watches Matteo and thinks that he slowly realizes that he's really fine* *then feels his hug and returns it immediately* *hugs him close and comfortingly and tenderly runs a hand over his neck and his hair* *lets himself glide to the bed with him and keeps holding him* *feels like he can feel Matteo's heart beating against his own chest and in that moment wishes that he could have spared him that uncertainty and the delay* *eventually feels like Matteo relaxes a little and then hears his words* *shakes his head slightly but feels a small stab in his chest because he doesn't even want to imagine how bad Matteo's thoughts were to be in such a condition* *quietly repeats* I'm fine... *kisses his forehead, because it's the only thing he can reach right now, and then explains again calmly* The subway had a technical malfunction and got stuck in the tunnel. I didn't have any signal and then my phone suddenly died... *hugs him a little closer again and murmurs* I'm sorry... I didn't want you to get worried...
Matteo: *listens to him and thinks that he should have thought of a subway malfunction* *buries his face a little more in David's neck* *but then quickly shakes his head* It's not your fault... *kisses his throat and his jaw* Well, everything's alright now... *hopes that David didn't hear too much of his panicked phone call earlier* *doesn't want him to worry about how worried he had been*
David: *shrugs slightly when Matteo says that it wasn't his fault* *thinks that he could have taken the bike or that he could have checked his battery and charged his phone before he left* *is angry at his non-existent ability to organize his appointments because if he had remembered the appointment earlier he surely would have charged his phone* *plans to really get a calendar* *gets pulled from his thoughts when Matteo kisses his throat and jaw and says that everything's alright now* *somehow doesn’t feel like it is* *he did know that Matteo might be a little concerned but didn't really expect to find him so worried and panicked(?)* *pulls away a little to be able to look at him but still hugs him closely* *eventually asks quietly* Is really everything alright? *presses his lips together for a moment, pushes a strand of hair from his face and adds* I mean... do you want to talk about how you felt? And how you are feeling now?
Matteo: *rolls a little onto his back when David pulls away and looks up at him* *immediately nods when he asks* Really... *then swallows at his next question and shakes his head slightly* I... I was just worried, ok? *lifts his hand and strokes over David's cheek before he puts it on the back of his neck and his fingers disappear into his hair* And now you're here... so everything's alright. Panic mode is switched off, ok?
David: *nods slowly when Matteo says that he was only worried and murmurs* Understandable... *briefly closes his eyes and leans into Matteo's touch when he runs it over his cheek and then smiles slightly at his words and opens his eyes again so that he can look at him* *nods and quietly says* Okay... *then smiles again and says* And I don't get hurt that easily...bad weeds grow tall! *grins and briefly nudges his nose against Matteo's* *then remembers in what state he has found Matteo in and gets a little more serious again and asks* Who were you talking to on the phone when I came in?
Matteo: *shakes his head at his joke and looks at him serious* Don't say that... you're not weeds… *presses his lips together when he hears David's question* *finds it a little over the top and also a little embarrassing in hindsight* *th *therefore only murmurs* Mmmm... the hospital... *then slightly pulls him towards him and hopes that he can distract him with a kiss*
David: *looks at Matteo skeptically when he hears his murmuring and needs a moment to understand what one thing has to do with the other* *lets Matteo pull him in and kiss him but realizes just how afraid Matteo must have been if he started calling hospitals* *tries to imagine what must have been going through his head but doesn't really manage* *pulls away from the kiss and puts his hand on his cheek so that he can look at him and quietly and with a small lump in his throat murmurs* You weren't just worried... you were really panicked... right? *feels his heart speed up at this comment and wonders if he just crossed some line by voicing his suspicion* *finds it hard to keep looking into Matteo's eyes but still manages somehow*
Matteo: *sighs slightly when David pulls away from the kiss* *knows immediately that David isn't done talking about it* *briefly looks away when he hears his question, which is probably enough of an answer* *tries to sort his feelings and put them into words and then looks at him again* *then very quietly says* Yes... *swallows again to somehow get rid of the lump in his throat and then tries to explain* I... I just have to know that you’re alright... *takes a deep breath and adds* I admit that my reaction just now was maybe a little exaggerated... but... somehow I was only making up horror scenarios and didn't think of a logical explanation like a dead battery...
David: *has to swallow when Matteo says that he has to know that he's alright and knows that it would be useless right now to reassure him that he's fine and that nothing is going to happen to him because there isn't really a guarantee for that* *feels how difficult it is for Matteo to talk about it and is grateful that he does it anyways* *listens to him and shakes his head slightly when he says that it was exaggerated and quietly says* If you can only think of horror scenarios then calling a hospital wasn't exaggerated but a logical conclusion to the horror scenarios... *knows what it's like to think up horror scenarios and how difficult it is to get out of it* *wishes that he could somehow help Matteo, just like Matteo helped him back then to get rid of his own horror scenarios, but doesn't really know how* *quietly and insecurely asks* Can someone... or I... do anything so that you... somehow get out of this panic mode easier in the future? *thinks that the question is actually stupid because if Matteo knew how not to panic than he probably would have acted accordingly* *therefore adds quietly and a little helplessly* I promise I will be careful! And to make sure that my battery is always charged in the future. And I will buy a calendar to plan things better! And I promise that I will always do my best to be back with you as quickly as possible... because then I'm alright... when I'm with you...
Matteo: *grimaces slightly when David says that it was a logical conclusion* *thinks that it's nice of him but also knows that the scenarios weren't really logical* *shakes his head slightly when David asks if there's anything that he can do* Dunno... no... don't think so... *exhales slightly at David's suggestions and automatically has to smile a little* Hey, hey... *puts his hand on his cheek again and looks at him* It's not your responsibility, ok? You don't have to turn your life upside down just because I panic really quickly, okay? I also calm down again... *runs his thumb over David's cheek* Unfortunately, life can't be planned the way we might like to... sometimes I'll go a little nuts and sometimes you might go a little nuts... but we'll get through this, okay?
David: *nods slowly when Matteo says that there's nothing he can do* *would still like to do something and will at least continue to think about it* *then sees Matteo smile at his suggestions and also has to smile a little because of it* *but then gets serious again when he hears his next words and interrupts him* *takes Matteo's hand off his cheek and sits up a little, pulling a little away from him when he does, and looks at him seriously* It is! It is my responsibility! And I won't turn my life upside down because of you but because of us! No, it's actually not even turning it upside down! It's the same thing as if you don't go into the water and tell me that you don't mind! Basically it's not your responsibility, either, that I don't want to go into the water in front of other people! And it's also not your responsibility that my butt hurts after my injection! And the mastectomy isn't your responsibility, either! But you made it your responsibility because... because it's about us... yeah, okay, it's actually about me, but because I somehow belong to you... and you belong to me! And therefore any horror scenarios you think of or panic you feel is also my responsibility! Because it affects you and because you belong to me and because I love you and because I want you to be alright! That has nothing to do with turning my life upside down! You're a part of my life... well, at least that's what I thought and so... *shrugs and doesn't really know how to continue* *isn't sure if Matteo even shares his opinion if he thinks that his emotional state and wellbeing aren't his responsibility*
Matteo: *stares at him during his outburst and doesn't even notice his eyes getting wet* *because this, what David was just able to beautifully put into words, is exactly how he feels when it's about David* *didn't really consider that David feels the same way* *quickly wipes a hand over his eyes and shakes his head* Yes... well... you are... a part of me and I... well, I... *takes a deep breath and then nods* Okay... I... I'm just... *then shrugs a little helpless* I'm not really used to this... that someone likes to feel responsible for me... and I... *then looks at him and notices his eyes getting wet again* *quietly says* I love you, too... very much... but I think I still have to get used to it...
David: *sees Matteo's eyes getting wet and gets a lump in his throat* *at first can't really place what's going on inside Matteo and if his speech was a good thing or a bad thing* *then smiles slightly when he confirms that he’s a part of him and calmingly puts a hand on his chest when he realizes how difficult it is for Matteo to find words* *feels the lump in his throat grow bigger when he says that he's not used to people feeling responsible for him because he's so sorry that Matteo has never made that experience* *then realizes that he only really knows this feeling because of Matteo – to some degree also from Laura, of course, but that's something different because she's his sister, and that in the beginning he also had difficulties believing Matteo that he really doesn't mind and is still stunned and surprised when he realizes that Matteo is doing this with him* *puts his hand on Matteo's cheek when he notices his eyes getting wet again and scoots a little closer to him again* *then smiles when he says that he also loves him and smiles slightly at his next words* *leans forward and presses a soft kiss to his mouth while softly running his thumb over his cheek* *then puts his forehead against his and looks at him* *quietly says* The getting used to will get easier with time... I'm talking from experience... *kisses him again and murmurs* I want to be there for you! I want to be there for you the way you're there for me!
Matteo: *is unsure* *doesn’t know if he was able to find the right words* *smiles in relief when David kisses him and wraps his arm around him, his eyes closed* *keeps them closed when David speaks and nods slightly* *gets kissed again and then hears that he wants to be there for him* *kisses him again and once again* *murmurs “okay” against his lips, which may not sound like much but means a lot for Matteo* *a small confirmation of him accepting it, of him letting David in, that he’ll let him see everything and that he trusts that David will stay* *kisses him again and then simply pulls him closer again* *puts his head back against David’s neck and breathes him in* *then looks at him and smiles slightly* I made coffee… to go along with the cake… do you want some?
David: *returns Matteo’s kisses and feels them both slowly relaxing again* *smiles into the kiss when he hears Matteo’s “okay” and knows that Matteo is going to try and that he will do everything he can not to disappoint him and to really be there for him* *gets pulled closer again by Matteo and lies down comfortably so that Matteo can put his head back onto his shoulder* *wraps both arms around him and holds him tight* *closes his eyes and enjoys being close to Matteo* *then feels Matteo move and opens his eyes when he hears his words so that he can return his gaze* *has to laugh quietly and nods* Sure… if the coffee’s still warm… *presses a kiss to Matteo’s temple and then sits up slowly, even though he finds it difficult to let go of Matteo right now* *looks at him* Do you want to go to the kitchen or should I bring the coffee and the cake in here?
Matteo: *grins slightly and nods* I’ve put it in a thermos… *then also sits up when David does and keeps his hand on his back* *thinks for a moment when he hears his question and then decides* Kitchen… *adds a little quieter* I don’t wanna hide… *then gets up and sees that the door is open* Oh… *points at the door and shrugs* *still hopes that the others were in their rooms*
David: *nods and smiles slightly when Matteo decides to go to the kitchen and gets up as well* *follows Matteo’s gaze to the door and shrugs as well* *grins slightly* So you either have very discreet roommates or they really aren’t home or they’re all in their rooms… *leans down to his duffel bag, that somehow has become a steady presence in Matteo’s room, and rummages around for his charger to take it with him to the kitchen* *then follows Matteo and plugs his phone in* *goes over to the cabinet and takes out two mugs and puts them on the table* *after all the emotional and physical closeness to Matteo he now feels a little naked and empty without any physical contact to him and waits for him to grab the coffee and cake to change this feeling*
Matteo: *goes to the counter and grabs the plate with the cake* *then grabs the thermos and puts both of it down on the table* *but goes back to the fridge to get the milk* *then feels his phone vibrate but doesn’t look at it* *assumes that it’s the messages from David that haven’t been sent earlier* *puts the milk on the table and grins at him* Enjoy… I already had some… *sits down and pours coffee for them* *sees David scoot his chair closer to his chair and smiles* *leans his head against his shoulder*
(next play)
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