#valuable life lessons

[right-path-to-follow]

How To Be A Better Person Pt. 2 Being Honest With Yourself

This is the most important step in becoming the best version of yourself; a good person. You might ask, "If this is the most important step, why isn't it first?" That's because you needed to test yourself. You needed to see that you are willing to self-reflect and be honest with yourself with an outsider's guidance before you'd be willing to hear from an outsider that you're not being honest with yourself.

You might ask, "If I'm completely honest, it's going to be with myself, right?" Wrong. You will be the first person to convince yourself that you are doing the right thing, that you're "actually being nice", or that you're "just being brutally honest". You don't want to believe that you're not a good person, or that your actions could be portrayed as bad. You will be the first person to be dishonest with yourself.

It's no secret that feeling bad isn't a good feeling. Everyone makes justifications for certain actions and behaviors. It's perfectly normal that you do as well, as long as you try to be more aware of what you say and do to others and actively try to do things in a more pleasing manor.

For example, there is never a reason to be "brutally honest". A good person has no need for brutality. If you intention is ever to be "brutally honest", then you don't have good intentions.

Say a family memeber's own actions have contributed to them being in a long-term depression. It would be horribly unkind of you to tell that family member, "You're a lazy slob who aspires for more than you're willing to put the effort into achieving." Instead, try saying in a positive, uplifting tone: "Hey, Uncle Josh, did you know the local tattoo shop has a booth open? I talked to the owner, he doesn't know you, so you're good to talk to him. I'm sure you'd feel really good having some of your own money, instead of having my mom always telling you 'no' when you ask her for $15 dollars and having her accuse you of only asking because you want liquor." Phrase it in a way that makes people WANT to hear what you have to say, and you're on the right way to being a better version of yourself; a good person.

If you ever find yourself telling someone to "lower their standards", you're not actually doing them a favor, therefore you're not "actually being nice", and you need to be honest with yourself about that.

Lastly, you're lying to yourself with you go out of your way to make justifications for objectively bad actions. For example, if you're in a stated monogamous romantic relationship with one person, and you choose to invest in a different, unofficiated romantic relationship, you might tell yourself that the right thing to do is to leave your current partner so you won't continue to hurt them in one way or another. This is actually very, very selfish. Should you make the decision to leave your partner for someone else, the pretense of doing it so that you won't "continue to lead them on" or so that way "they can find someone who will truly love them", that pretense is lost when your (ex) partner has to completely change their lifestyle, schedule, finances, all while doing so alone and grieving. In this circumstance, you've done nothing but lie to yourself so you could be more comfortable making your selfish decision. The right thing to do is simply not build any sort of relationship that could lead to romance while already in a romantic relationship. If you honest with yourself, and you feel as though it's not something control, please know you don't need friendships with people who fall into any of your romantic preferences.

If you try being honest with yourself about your intentions and feelings every time you enter a new situation or are presented with a new situation, then you will be on your way to being a better version of yourself; a good person.

[dittobooty]

I made Mob Psycho 100 motivational posters based on all the important lessons I took away from the series using official art

They're free for anyone to use I hope they help people feel good and motivated

[thedreadvampy]

sometimes I forget that my experience has been. um. not 'your experiences are not universal' vibes but more like 'your experiences are EXTREMELY atypical'

[spencereliotwinchester]

I’d like to bring attention to Nate Ford for a second.

As Eliot explains the different ways to hold a knife he’s like “I don’t know, I feel like this isn’t very relevant to me, also what have I gotten myself into.”

Then Eliot points the knife at him and Nate’s like “oh that’s uncomfortable, I don’t like Eliot pointing knives at me.” THEN, Nate’s leaning back and just like “This man is so much scarier than I thought. Thank God he’s on my side. How stable is this guy?”

OR

Eliot teaches Nate a VERY valuable and relevant lesson on how to hold knives for maximum usage and efficiency, but ends up just scaring/traumatizing Nate.

Sha Hai (2018) | Leverage (2008)

[hooked-on-elvis]

Many of you remember how Elvis would express his appreciation to the audience after every song he performed, emphasizing these magic words:  “Thank You, Thank you very much!”. The first lesson we can learn from Elvis is this: If we are in a service position (and aren’t we all?), the four most important words in our business are “Thank You Very Much.”  Excerpt from a "THANK YOU VERY MUCH, INC." post in its blog.

I decided to share this because it touched me to think about how Elvis influenced his fans, in life as a whole but also in the way some of them carry their business too. I just learned there's this business lady, Holly Stiel, that named her business - apparently - after one of Elvis' most famous words while a performer. She runs a consulting business in the field of concierge/customer service. I am really touched by the way she talked about what EP taught her, something she dedicates part of her life teaching others: Always show your appreciation to how others help you in any way they do.

[lepitorus]

they had an equally good time at the arcade

[malebreastmilk]

can i be the choso mlp lady? ?? has anyone taken this title already?????? (ps if u are reading this. and like choso x readers... feel free to send me suggestiosnl... m learning to write stuff more ill gladly try ur suggestions :3<3)(drawing suggestions too... if uw ant...)

[novadreii]

rewatched arrival for the hundredth time. this movie never fails to gut punch me with its approach to determinism. louise embracing her future that she knows every moment of, despite the tremendous loss and pain it contains, with open arms. she doesn't hesitate, or ruminate on how she can try and change it. she accepts it all, the good and the bad, because what she gains is worth it, so many times over for her. she steels herself against a certain future and runs forward to meet it all, to love, learn, and lose, and trusts and leans on herself to live through it all. because that's what life is; it's the joy and the suffering. to try and isolate the joy alone is madness, futility in its purest definition.

comparing her line of thinking to a palindrome (how she named her daughter, hannah), the movie kept emphasizing, "it's the same backwards as it is forwards." it doesn't matter if you can see the end; life is the same whether you live it "forwards" (without knowledge of the future) or "backwards" (with foresight). it doesn't change the significance of your life experiences; to try and avoid certain future pain just because you have the knowledge of it is a zero sum game. you think you win because you avoided pain, but you also avoided the joy that preceded it. the metamorphosis. so you still lose if you try to win, and vice-versa.

all you can do is rush forward and take it all head-on. see this whole beautiful mess as your one most precious gift; this one life, this one chance, a laughably miniature blip on the colossus that is linear time, to experience all there is to feel before you return back to an eternity without perception. it's all worth it, because only in living a full-fledged life open to everything it has to offer does the experience of living turn out to be greater than the sum of its parts; it's in trying to beat the system (avoid pain) that we actually lose.

"if you could see your whole life from start to finish, would you change things?"

"maybe i'd say what i feel more often. i...i don't know."

[cannibaldyke]

i think “doesn’t have a clear/valuable message” is an incredibly stupid criticism to have for an 80s b-movie

[ae-cha08]

See breaks as part of your workday. Taking longer breaks to prevent decision fatigue.

Work hard, rest hard. Have you taken a break today? ☕️

[personalzombie-tv]

I love Owen owengejuicetv's storytelling style so much. Based purely on how exactly he's handling the hybrid lore this man has read our fanfics n meta. He knows what we expect and he's serving it up on a novelty anime plate. Sparrow has my entire heart, this dingus is gonna grow wings one day and be so jazzed about it he crashes face first into a wall and dies again!

[stuckinapril]

i'm really struggling with letting go of people and not vilanizing myself. like if they chose to cut me from their life then i must be a bad guy? :( tbh i was just wondering if u had any advice in regards to this?

The simple truth is people are imperfect and will not always make their decisions based off an objective assessment of who you are as a person. Some people just choose the easy way out (avoiding conflict) by cutting you off completely, bc that’s much easier than deliberating over a problem and handling it in a well-rounded way. What makes this even worse is the fact that that kind of thinking is romanticized by pop psychology advice these days—cutoff culture is bigger now more than ever, even when it’s not necessarily the answer. It gets packaged as a confident, no-nonsense approach; the reality is that some people are too weak (or maybe just not emotionally intelligent enough) to deal w your/their feelings. So they remove you from their life altogether.

Obviously I don’t think this is always the ethical thing to do. Sometimes it is the right call to cut someone from your life, but in typical tiktok fashion, people have taken this too far and misapplied it to relationships that simply deserve more than that. You don’t owe everyone everything, but you do owe some people a form of explanation as to why you’re literally terminating them from your life. It depends on the degree of closeness and the situation that instigated the rift to begin with. Deciding when to cut off and when to communicate is an important skill to have—but not a lot of people have it.

Another possibility is just that you did cross their boundaries, you did something you weren’t supposed to do, it was hurtful enough to warrant this recourse, etc… and in that case you have no choice but to review your behavior, vow to yourself not do it again, and move on. This is your first time being alive. Not your second or your third. You’re bound to make mistakes. Everyone is. That’s where healthy self-compassion comes in: with recognizing these mistakes, but with not beating yourself up for them forever. It may read as cliche, but you’re literally human & mistakes are literally unavoidable. It’s when you refuse to adapt your behavior and move on that issues arise.

If you don’t grant yourself the gift of forgiveness, you’ll find it impossible to forgive anybody else. Be graceful and patient w yourself, but don’t make a habit of repeating mistakes. And don’t ruminate on something that’s in the past. There are 8 billion out there and an abundance of friendships to make. Just because it didn’t work out with someone, doesn’t mean it won’t work out with the countless other people you have a chance of meeting and forming a wonderful connection with

[incorrecttigerandbunny]

Antonio: Kaede asked me to hold her ice cream without eating any, and I was like, I love you, kid, but some lessons you have to learn the hard way.

[authorafterhours]

Watching Courage the Cowardly Dog would have destroyed Will as a kid.

[chaoticvictorianspirit]

I'm so for real right now, I'd absolutely nail being stuck in a time loop. it's my desired state of being actually.

[imflyingfish]

i want to do some scenery sketches based on the 101 dalmations style.. maybe i will take my sketchbook outside at some point and do that