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translifetips · 6 days ago

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Are you transgender and scared of the future of America? Here is how you can keep yourself safe.

The results of this election are not at all what we expected or wanted them to be. While this is incredibly unfair and there is a strong likely hood that Trump cheated, we must move on. The government, and our country has failed us. The next four years are looking to be very dark for people of color, women, immigrants, queer and transgender people. These times are very frightening, but we still have time before things change. Trump will not be in office until inauguration day, which is Monday, the 20th of January 2025. While we do not know exactly what will happen to transgender people after Trump is in office, project 2025 is stated to remove protections of LGBTQ+ individuals.

So, what can transgender people in America do to stay safe in Trump's America? First, know the safety of where you live. Many states, even states that were red in this election, have laws that protect transgender individuals in hate crime laws, and how they regulate gender. Lgbtmaps is a wonderful resource to figure out if your state is safe. If you live in a state that is generally not safe for transgender people and moving somewhere safer (such as states in New England, New York, California etc.) is an option, you should do so now. For those that live in unsafe areas and cannot leave, you still have options.

If you are on HRT, consider stockpiling your hormones. Testosterone and estrogen can be purchased online. This site can show you how to get hormones online. IF you purchase hormones online, be cautious and do your research on the website you are purchasing from. If you can, use a prepaid visa card instead of a credit or debit card. Producing your own hormones is an option, but this should be a LAST RESORT option. Passing, though unnecessary in trans places, will become extremely important as aggression against transgender people becomes more rampant under Trump's reign.

For transgender men, consider binding using trans-tape or KT tape (around $5 at Walmart for the generic brand) instead of using a binder. Using tape is generally safer, you can wear it 24/7 without having to take binding breaks. If you decide to wear tape instead of a binder, watch a tutorial before using. Packing may also be necessary, using something as simple as a folded pair of socks can give the illusion of being male. Do not fear using the men's bathroom, most cisgender men are stupid don't know transgender men exist, let alone use their bathrooms. Using a 'stand to pee' device may be helpful, but most men do not think anything of a man peeing sitting down (if you are questioned, you have diarrhea).

For transgender women, you can wear a face mask in public if you have traces of facial hair, this can also help to disguise your voice. Tucking generally will make or break your passing, but you can wear loose clothing such as skirts and dresses as an alternative. Since I am not a transgender woman, I don't have all of the tips and tricks that transgender women might have, if you have specific questions for passing in female spaces there are resources such as the mtf subreddit where you can get advice from people who are in the same place you are.

This is also the time to change your name, and if possible, your sex, on your id and birth certificate. Changing your name is a relatively easy process in most states, and most states do not require publication of name change statements. Your state's government website should have information about how you can change your name. In 2022 and living in Massachusetts, it took me just a few days for my name change to be finalized, though this will differ based on where you live.

If you live in one of the twenty-five states that allows it, you can even amend your birth certificate to show your preferred sex without even having sex reassignment surgery! This process, at least for me, was somewhat of a lengthy process but the result is your future employers never needing to know that you are transgender. Most cisgender people do not even know that this is an option. This will be easiest for people who have a diagnosis of gender dysphoria from a doctor, but if you are on HRT, you already have that. Specific states have different laws and processes, so be sure to check your state's government website for what you need and how to go about it. I underwent this process in Massachusetts, so if you have any questions about how this looks in Massachusetts, send me a message.

Most states allow gender markers on IDs to be changed, some even allow an 'X' to be marked instead of 'M' or 'F'.

Overall, be safe and careful. These are just tips on what you can do now while things are still safe. There is no telling what the future will hold, but we can control the present. To all of my trans siblings, we will get through this. The world is a better place with you in it. Do not let them take away your identity. Be there for your friends. If anyone needs help or just someone to talk to, my inbox is open.

If you are struggling crisis lines are available: Call 988- Suicide and crisis lifeline

Text 'TALK' to 741-741- Crisis text line

Call 1-866-488-7386- Trevor Project lifeline

Text START to 678-678- Trevor Project text line

Call 1-877-360-LGBT (5428)- LGBT crisis lifeline

Call 1-877-565-8860- Trans lifeline

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romanianwilkinson · 3 years ago

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MONSTER CAMP QUOTES STARTERS

A collection of sentence starters from the game Monster Camp. Feel free to change words and pronouns as desired. CONTENT WARNING(S) FOR: Monster Prom/Monster Camp spoilers, suggestive, cursing, crude content

“ I just have it here because [NAME] insisted that I offer it, as a marketing stunt. ”

“ And lastly, super-horny-type players no longer get a charm buff against tsundere types! ”

“ War machines don’t turn me on or anything! ”

“ I don’t wanna be weird, but do you mind if I climb inside of you and play around with your main turret? ”

“ A wine to DIE for, you say? Well, darling, don’t threaten me with a good time! ”

“ This one just says ‘ hmu with that reaper dick, daddy ’. ”

“ You on your phone, as always! Probably making blogposts on your Tik Tok page. ”

“ Yeah, you really don’t want to witness a repeat of the last time [NAME]’s diehard fans went without a selfie for fifteen minutes. My tailbone still hasn’t completely healed. ”

“ Now hold still, this will only hurt for a moment --- ”

“ Yay! You found a shenanigan! ”

“ My poems all have two or three emotions in them, AT LEAST. ”

“ CRYING IS OBVIOUSLY A COMPETITION TO SEE WHO CAN SQUEEZE THE MOST WATER OUT OF THEIR EYES! ”

“ No way, really? The way to WIN at poetry is by LOSING at life? ”

“ I dunno, maybe fall in love with someone who’s married and develop an opioid addiction? ”

“ HELL YEAH, SPEEDRUN! ”

“ It’s morbid, but... kind of romantic? ”

“ GASP! Google+? Are you kidding me? The psychopaths behind that global tragedy are here?! ”

“ Prison has changed me, [NAME]. Would you like to trade me some cigarettes in exchange for my fundamental dignity? ”

“ Undermining the laws of reality, subverting life and death, that’s the kind of stuff my followers expect. But CHEATING? No way. ”

“ Though we are imprisoned in chalk jail, we are free in our hearts. But our hearts are also imprisoned in chalk jail. ”

“ Um, no, I am NOT groveling. I am posing a dignified query to [NAME] that just so happens to be performed on my hands and knees. ”

“ I didn’t know you condoned playing the friend card to get free labor, [NAME]. ”

“ Ah, but saving the world doesn’t put avocado toast on the table. We indie seancers and necromancers need to pay our rent too, you know. ”

“ And as you know, I am illustriously Internet-famous, so if you could shower me with adoration and give me the pizza that would be fabulous. ”

“ Do you wanna fuck the pizza or not? ”

“ Are you ready to go swimming? I must admit, darling, I’ve always wondered what you would look like while... wet.”

“ Did you turn this date into an orgy without consulting me? ”

“ Gosh, I love it when you insult me! Please do it more! ”

“ Now who wants to make a baby? ”

“ What if she puts a curse on me that makes me magically forget the location of the clitoris?! ”

“ Hey, don’t knock wacky decisions that endanger us all! That’s how I always manage to stay a step ahead of my nemeses! ”

“ Oh gods, I’ve killed so many monsters, just for being monsters. This is making me question my entire moral foundation. I NEED MORE THERAPY. ”

“ I’ve said it once, and I’ll say it again: fish give better pedicures than people! ”

“ You’re not tricking me into parenting a stupid egg. I’ve never fucked even ONE chicken! The egg is not my son! ”

“ You came to visit me at camp, Daddy! ”

“ Don’t be ridiculous, I know your brand of horny, [NAME], and this ain’t it. ”

“ I thought we both agreed to be nothing but vague and haughtily aloof about our past dalliances. ”

“ Point EAST, compass! EAAAAAAAAST! You dumb fuckboot!!!! POINT! EAST! ”

“ One time I was told a soul’s worst fear was bugs and I inadvertantly sent The Beatles. It happens to the best of us... And the worst of us. ”

“ SOMEDAY I SHALL DEFEAT YOUR FIVE STRANGE FEET! ”

“ Why do you keep suppressing your monster half? Embrace your true nature! ”

“ Wow. I didn't think this was possible, but I guess I was... wrong? About social media? Oh dear God, is this how grandparents feel?!?! Am I a GRANDPARENT?! ”

“ I don’t know! I was relying on my friends to cover up my bold and idiotic statement! ”

“ ... I ate the oars. ”

“ PSYCHE. The ocean can eat my ass. ”

“ So pucker up, [NAME]! I'm about to declare mouth war on your FACE! ”

“ YOU FOOLISHLY FOOLISH FOOL! You're showing our inexperience! YOUR HONOR, THE ENTIRE LEGAL TEAM PLEADS THE FIFTH! ”

“ That's right. I'm talking about a classic Transylvania Hot Tub, a Seth Brundle, and a REVERSE Reverse Romanian Wilkinson. ”

“ Sorry, I was in your ribcage seeing if I could use it to cut strips of crepe paper into confetti and then I got lost in your kidneys. ”

“ There's nothing sexier than a doomed romance between a dating sim player and a hot fictional character. ”

“ That's right! I secretly replaced one of you with a bear while no one was looking, to teach you a valuable lesson about the art of disguise! ”

“ Enchant my armor. I’m going into the lake. ”

“ For VIOLENCE REASONS! ”

“ This stupid lake monster called me short the other day, but I was too low level to crush him like he deserved. ”

“ That dumb wet dinkhole won't know what hit him! But it will be me! I will hit him! ”

“ No, YOU'RE a fuckshark! Also, what does that even mean?! ”

“ You seriously didn't notice the enormous needles those interns jabbed into your veins as soon as [NAME] got here? “

“ It all makes sense! The Camp Dome is just an elaborate ploy to distract us from the giant mouth that eats campers! “

“ This is the BEST show I've ever seen in my life, which is now at an end! “

“ Am I high, or did he just tell us EXACTLY how to foil his evil scheme? “

“ What, like a few severed heads and visions of my grandpa screaming in horrendous pain are gonna freak me out? Where I'm from, you can buy that stuff at IKEA. “

“ ERROR: Due to the sixth mass extinction, the slaying of leprechauns is inadvisable. “

“ Then why do I have half-finished scarves, decoupage, pot-holders, friendship bracelets, and a taxidermied rabbit in my skeleton? “

“ The wang elemental. ”

“ I also have an uncle who works at Nintendo as a copy machine! “

“ What flavor of ice cream AM I?! Now I gotta know. HA! You know what I should be? 'Pistachio.' Because my outside is HARD, but I'm full of NUT. “

“ I mean, life is a bit like... this sandwich! No, stay with me, I'm going somewhere good with this. “

“ A survival situation without any sexy fun time isn't worth surviving in the first place. “

“ Rut the RUCK?! ”

“ The ' ambulance of the heart ' is just a regular ambulance! Ambulances treat all organs! ”

“ Yeah, that's why I made sure that my so-called ' emotional armor ' was also ' actual armor '. “

“ And being yourself is the key to living your dreams, which is the key to self actualization, which is the key to being really good at sex! “

“ So hot I'd buy that even without free shipping. 10/10, call me some time. “

“ Hi, quick question: does it count as kidnapping if I'm abducting you so you can help me do a thing you already agreed to help with? “

“ I could be wrong, but are you just upset because you DON'T have a skeleton that's inside your body? “

“ I'm gonna get SO FUCKING RELAXED MY HEAD WILL EXPLODE! “

“ Whoah, whoa, hold up. You're fucking my grandma? “

“ No, [NAME], that is a popcorn bag full of more dynamite. Put it down. “

“ I hear that at least 70% of people on Patreon aren't murderers! “

“ If you want cash, just rob banks like the rest of us! “

“ Did it work? Do you feel any less horny? ”

“ FUCK YEAH, LET'S PUNCH THAT MOUTH IN ITS MOUTH! “

“ Yes... incidentally, we are no longer allowed to enter Italy. “

“ Is anyone else turned on right now? ”

“ Yes! Yes! I know what you're feeling! I suddenly see how marrying a corpse isn't okay! “

“ JUST LET ME IMPROVE YOUR SELF ESTEEM, MORTAL! “

“ Look, choose whatever you want, but I'm not responsible for whatever you put in your mouth. ”

#rp starters #rp sentence starters #roleplay meme #roleplay starters #rp meme #ask meme #rp ask meme #monster prom #monster camp #monster prom rp #monster prom roleplay #monster camp rp #monster camp roleplay #mine

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blackpoetry · 3 years ago

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Somebody Blew Up America They say its some terrorist, some barbaric A Rab, in Afghanistan It wasn't our American terrorists It wasn't the Klan or the Skin heads Or the them that blows up nigger Churches, or reincarnates us on Death Row It wasn't Trent Lott Or David Duke or Giuliani Or Schundler, Helms retiring

It wasn't The gonorrhea in costume The white sheet diseases That have murdered black people Terrorized reason and sanity Most of humanity, as they pleases

They say (who say?) Who do the saying Who is them paying Who tell the lies Who in disguise Who had the slaves Who got the bux out the Bucks

Who got fat from plantations Who genocided Indians Tried to waste the Black nation

Who live on Wall Street The first plantation Who cut your nuts off Who rape your ma Who lynched your pa

Who got the tar, who got the feathers Who had the match, who set the fires Who killed and hired Who say they God & still be the Devil

Who the biggest only Who the most goodest Who do Jesus resemble

Who created everything Who the smartest Who the greatest Who the richest Who say you ugly and they the goodlookingest

Who define art Who define science

Who made the bombs Who made the guns

Who bought the slaves, who sold them

Who called you them names Who say Dahmer wasn't insane

Who? Who? Who?

Who stole Puerto Rico Who stole the Indies, the Philipines, Manhattan Australia & The Hebrides Who forced opium on the Chinese

Who own them buildings Who got the money Who think you funny Who locked you up Who own the papers

Who owned the slave ship

Who run the army

Who the fake president Who the ruler Who the banker

Who? Who? Who?

Who own the mine Who twist your mind Who got bread Who need peace Who you think need war

Who own the oil Who do no toil Who own the soil Who is not a nigger Who is so great ain't nobody bigger

Who own this city

Who own the air Who own the water

Who own your crib Who rob and steal and cheat and murder and make lies the truth Who call you uncouth

Who live in the biggest house Who do the biggest crime Who go on vacation anytime

Who killed the most niggers Who killed the most Jews Who killed the most Italians Who killed the most Irish Who killed the most Africans Who killed the most Japanese Who killed the most Latinos

Who? Who? Who?

Who own the ocean Who own the airplanes Who own the malls Who own television Who own radio

Who own what ain't even known to be owned Who own the owners that ain't the real owners

Who own the suburbs Who suck the cities Who make the laws

Who made Bush president Who believe the confederate flag need to be flying Who talk about democracy and be lying

Who the Beast in Revelations Who 666 Who know who decide Jesus get crucified

Who the Devil on the real side Who got rich from Armenian genocide

Who the biggest terrorist Who change the bible Who killed the most people Who do the most evil Who don't worry about survival

Who have the colonies Who stole the most land Who rule the world Who say they good but only do evil Who the biggest executioner

Who? Who? Who?

Who own the oil Who want more oil Who told you what you think that later you find out a lie

Who? Who? Who?

Who found Bin Laden, maybe they Satan Who pay the CIA, Who knew the bomb was gonna blow Who know why the terrorists Learned to fly in Florida, San Diego

Who know why Five Israelis was filming the explosion And cracking they sides at the notion

Who need fossil fuel when the sun ain't goin' nowhere

Who make the credit cards Who get the biggest tax cut Who walked out of the Conference Against Racism Who killed Malcolm, Kennedy & his Brother Who killed Dr King, Who would want such a thing? Are they linked to the murder of Lincoln?

Who invaded Grenada Who made money from apartheid Who keep the Irish a colony Who overthrow Chile and Nicaragua later

Who killed David Sibeko, Chris Hani, the same ones who killed Biko, Cabral, Neruda, Allende, Che Guevara, Sandino,

Who killed Kabila, the ones who wasted Lumumba, Mondlane, Betty Shabazz, Die, Princess Di, Ralph Featherstone, Little Bobby

Who locked up Mandela, Dhoruba, Geronimo, Assata, Mumia, Garvey, Dashiell Hammett, Alphaeus Hutton

Who killed Huey Newton, Fred Hampton, Medgar Evers, Mikey Smith, Walter Rodney, Was it the ones who tried to poison Fidel Who tried to keep the Vietnamese Oppressed

Who put a price on Lenin's head

Who put the Jews in ovens, and who helped them do it Who said "America First" and ok'd the yellow stars

Who killed Rosa Luxembourg, Liebneckt Who murdered the Rosenbergs And all the good people iced, tortured, assassinated, vanished

Who got rich from Algeria, Libya, Haiti, Iran, Iraq, Saudi, Kuwait, Lebanon, Syria, Egypt, Jordan, Palestine,

Who cut off peoples hands in the Congo Who invented Aids Who put the germs In the Indians' blankets Who thought up "The Trail of Tears"

Who blew up the Maine & started the Spanish American War Who got Sharon back in Power Who backed Batista, Hitler, Bilbo, Chiang kai Chek

Who decided Affirmative Action had to go Reconstruction, The New Deal, The New Frontier, The Great Society,

Who do Tom Ass Clarence Work for Who doo doo come out the Colon's mouth Who know what kind of Skeeza is a Condoleeza Who pay Connelly to be a wooden negro Who give Genius Awards to Homo Locus Subsidere

Who overthrew Nkrumah, Bishop, Who poison Robeson, who try to put DuBois in Jail Who frame Rap Jamil al Amin, Who frame the Rosenbergs, Garvey, The Scottsboro Boys, The Hollywood Ten

Who set the Reichstag Fire

Who knew the World Trade Center was gonna get bombed Who told 4000 Israeli workers at the Twin Towers To stay home that day Why did Sharon stay away?

Who? Who? Who?

Explosion of Owl the newspaper say The devil face cd be seen

Who make money from war Who make dough from fear and lies Who want the world like it is Who want the world to be ruled by imperialism and national oppression and terror violence, and hunger and poverty.

Who is the ruler of Hell? Who is the most powerful

Who you know ever Seen God?

But everybody seen The Devil

Like an Owl exploding In your life in your brain in your self Like an Owl who know the devil All night, all day if you listen, Like an Owl Exploding in fire. We hear the questions rise In terrible flame like the whistle of a crazy dog

Like the acid vomit of the fire of Hell Who and Who and WHO who who Whoooo and Whooooooooooooooooooooo! Courtesy of; http://www.afropoets.net/amiribaraka.html

#black poems #black poets society #black writers #poetry #america

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greekbros · 4 years ago

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"greek-Bros: When in Rome, wait wut?; The Reboot Nobody Fucking Asked For"

*after two incidences with his sons, Zeus has recruited Hades and Poseidon to investigate why the living hell was so distracting about Rome*

Zeus: *poorly disguised as a shepard* Well, it is a mighty fine city indeed. It's almost comparable to Athens. Don't you think so?

Poseidon: *also poorly disguised as the world's most muscular fisherman* It is dear brother! Why even our statues here are incredibly beautiful!

Hades: *who's cleverly disgusted as an old lady* hmf.

Poseidon: What's the matter Hades? Disgruntled that you don't have a shrine dedicated to you?

Hades: No quite frankly I actually don't care about shrines or temples in my honor. *Looks around and sees the same issues that the Bois saw* .....why do the mortals here call me Pluto?

Zeus and Poseidon: *both laugh at that*

Hades: Hahaha, laugh all you want.

Centurion: YOU TWO! How DARE you laugh at that poor, ugly old crone! You're under arrest for harassing the elderly!

Hades: *grins*

Zeus: *having absolutly none of this BS* .......

Poseidon: Ugh but sir we-

Centurion: *takes out cuffs and chains, FuCkInG puts them on Zeus and Poseidon* You're coming downtown! *Drags the both of them*

Zeus: *glares into space completely understanding why his sons tried to destroy Rome*

Poseidon: But sir! You can't just thrown people in jail for laughing!

Centurion: *in a completely casual tone* I deeply sorry sir but as of late there has been a zero tolerance policy throughout the city, orders say we MUST make an immediate arrest and put you through the identification process.

Hades: *still as an old crone clicks heels and walks away to sight see*

*later*

Mortus: *looming in the dark corner of the interrogation room, walks slowly to the table and slams his fist*.....where were you on the day of the Coliseum's destruction... And if you weren't there where were you on the day of its reopening?

An innocent bean farmer: *shaking in fear* ugh....in my field sir?

Mortus: *glares at the farmer*

A Centurion: *walks in the room* Sir! We have more prisoners! I think you maybe interested in these two.

Mortus: *slowly turns around* ......if this is another dead end.... you're joining the rest of the scum at the crucifixion field.

A Centurion: *gulps* ....y-yes sir.

Mortus: Bring them in...oh and release this one.

Bean Farmer: *just fucking bolts out of the room*

Mortus: .....

Centurion: *brings in Zeus, whom already looks a little claustrophobic in the already small room* There's a second one outside.

*outside*

Poseidon: *apparently has attracted the attention of many young beautiful women* Fear not Roman citizens! For I Po-*thinks of a name*...uhm...Paul.... understands your infatuation, but alas I am happily married, BUT let that not stop you from admiring my very being! *Tries to flex while handcuffed*

The small crowd of women: *swooned*

A Centurion: oh shut up.

*inside*

Mortus: *actually a little intimidated by Zeus and his stone cold resting death face*....Well now....you rather large for a shepard. Retired I suppose?

Zeus: ....no.

Mortus: Than what is your occupation?

Zeus: ......I do not think you have the jurisdiction to ask me.

Mortus: *getting angry* Where were you when the Coliseum was being destroyed!?

Zeus: .... Probably with your mother, who I would be certain would be very ashamed that her son has decided to harass the elderly.

Mortus: *steaming mad* YOU WILL ANSWER THE QUESTION!

Zeus: I want to speak with my lawyer.

Mortus: WHAT?!?

A Centurion: Um sir, we have a Mr-*looks at a crudly written card* Plutonium? He's a law maker and legally represents the detainee.

Mortus: *feeling a cold sweat as if the devil has entered the building, looks at Zeus*

Zeus: *smiling*

Mortus: ....bring him in.

Hades: *now looks more like a mortal version of himself but now carries a satchel* Good evening my name is Cryus Plutonium and I have heard my client and his brother have been unlawfully detained. *Places a scroll on the table* Sir if I may infer, I've been working several weeks in the law office and I have found no evidence of this new "Zero tolerance policy". So I do believe you have no legal right to detain and must release him-

Poseidon: *from outside* AND ME!

Hades: -and his brother.

Mortus: *stares in disbelief* ....what.

Hades: *slowly walks to Zeus and unbinds him*

Zeus: thank you.

Hades: Now. Let us l-*feels a sword near his next* ......

Mortus: *has just about snapped* .....I've been after you and your mutant kin for a whole year and three months.....you owe not just me....but you owe the empire....an explanation.

Hades: ............

Zeus: ...........*lifts a finger, shocks him and tases Mortus, knocking him cold* ................you know something.......I think I finally understand why the children hate this place.

Hades: *shakes his head, as the two leave they see poseidon just flexing for a small crowd while the Centurion who was gaurding him is tied to a support beam*

A Centurion: Please help me.

Zeus: *points and sarcastically smiles* No. *Walks to Poseidon and drags him* It's time to go.

Poseidon: Awww....but I was just getting the crowd warmed up!

Hades: Let's just say they'll be warmed up with a few weeks of heavy thunderstorms.

Poseidon: .....can there be earthqu-

Zeus: You may bury the lot.

Poseidon: *smiles* Huzzah!

Hades: Or....we can be a little less intrusive.

Zeus: Fine, I shall ask Odin if he wants to help.

Hades: Yes my thoughts exactly.

Zeus: *still angry until he sees Octavia and little Caius and suddenly feels a little odd*......Hades.

Hades: yes

Zeus: I understand you don't have children...but what are the chances that one of my sons may have left something behind.

Hades: *trying to understand what Zeus meant until he saw Caius* Hmm....oh come now you're not going to take the child away from. His mother....or..... fornicate with her.....are you?

Zeus: .....oh damn it all....we can't destroy this city........

Poseidon: *in a singsong tone* I can! *Suddenly a little rumble starts until Zeus bonks him on the head* ~°

Zeus: No....the city of Rome...if officially protected.

Hades: ........all this because there's a bastard grandson around here isn't it?

Zeus: Silence Hades. Look at him, not a care in the world. Enjoying his moments with his dear mother talking to Hera a-WHAT THE?!?!

Hades: Wait Hera is here??

Poseidon: *rubbing his head* Hey look! It's Amphitrite too!

Hera: *talking to Octavia* Oh yes, married life is great but have you ever considered divorce?

Octavia: Oh heavens no, even though my husband has been rather distent. I'm positive he isn't in an adulterous relationship. That's punishable but crucifixion here.

Amphitrite: Well yes darling, for the WOMEN, men here get away with it scot-free.

Octavia: Oh heavens no.

Caius: *squirming a little*

Octavia: aww what the matter deary.

Hera: *knotices that Caius has few enough features of Zeus to be related but not directly enough to be his son* Aw what an adorable little baby boy. Who's the father?

Octavia: oh I'm happily married to General Mortus Biccus.

Hera: hmm....

Zeus: Oh there you are my beautiful, wonderful and not here to make sure I'm cheating on her wife! *Grits teeth* what are you doing here?!

Hera: ....I was wondering the same thing. I'm here shopping for some exotic fruits.

Amphitrite: *shows her basket of bananas*

Zeus: Oh.

Poseidon: *enthralled by the bananas* ohhhh.....

Hades: Well....I guess we can all go home then.

Octavia: Oh my! This must be your husband. You must be very lucky to have married such a big strong man.

Hera: *unamused* I am so blessed.

Zeus: *puts his arm around her* not as blessed as I am to be married to her.

Octavia: aww.

Caius: *kinda happy sensing he's found grandma and grandpa* c:

Zeus: *now getting a closer look, the baby literally looks like a spitting image of Hermes* oh my.

Mortus: THERE YOU ARE! *huffing and puffing from running* You are all under arrest!

Octavia: Oh Mortus, don't be so rude to these fine people they have done nothing wrong.

Mortus: This man shot LIGHTNING out of his finger! And that one *points to Hades* is...well he's just scary and THAT one is just annoying! *points to Poseidon*

Poseidon and Amphitrite: *sharing a banana and suddenly stop* hmf?

Mortus: These men are connected to the destruction of the coliseum last year and the disappearance of Gaius!

Zeus: ....Oh! You mean my sons? Oh yes they're actually harmless. You see, they're traveling magicians and they perform fantastic illusions!

Mortus: NO! FUCK YPU OLD MAN! I know what the people saw! Clearly something is going on! ...my suspensions are...that you...and your cohorts.....are demons!

Octavia: Mortus!

Caius: :c

Zeus: ....oh that's rather rude.

Hera: Now hang on a minute. Let's prove our innocence.

Zeus: Hera what are you doing?

Hera: .....you know, the gods are technically innocent....and exempt from being accused of any crime.

Mortus: *tempted to mention Emperor Caligula and his recent campaign against Poseidon but decided not to*

Hera: ...so...if we were gods...we would be innocent.

Octavia: Hmm...she does have a point.

Mortus: What are you getting at?

Zeus: *deep sigh* Fine...I lied.....me...my lovely wife and my brothers....are all gods......I'm actually Zeus, she's Hera and so on and so forth. My sons are were Apollo, Hermes and Dionysus....you see....it's likely their fault for losing their tempers, I apologize for that too. And I apologize for shocking you but you did threaten to crucify me.

Mortus: ..........*starts laughing hysterically and has officially lost his mind*

Octavia: Oh dear. Let's go honey, I must apologize for my husband's behavior. He's been working day and night. Oh sweetheart let's go.

Caius: byebye c: *waves*

Mortus: *while laughing like a mad man* HAHAHAH wait! I HAVE to know this but IS Caius here yours?!? HAHAHAHA I mean, I don't have BALLS! HAHAHAHAHAHA *gets dragged back home*

Zeus: ......you didn't help with that last portion did you?

Hera: No. I figured a man who looked as pathetic and desperate like that probably was already at his wit's end.... Speaking of which is that child yours?

Zeus: hmm....

*back at Olypmus*

Zeus: *pulls the ears of Hermes and Dionysus*

Hera: *helping with the situation and pulls Apollo's and Ares's ear*

Zeus: You boys are forbidden from returning to Rome. And as for you Hermes....it's one thing frolicking with farm maidens with incompetent husbands....but a war general with no testicles?....shame on you.

Hermes: *knows what he's talking about*.....worth it. *Feeling his ear getting pulled* ow~°

#Zeus #when in rome wait wut #greek-Bros #greek bros #greek gods #roman vs greek jokes #hera #poseidon #hades #Amphitrite #dionysus #Apollo #ares #hermes

29 notes · View notes

jq37 · 5 years ago

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The Royal Report– A Crown of Candy Ep 4 The Grand Tournament

An Extremely Normal Tourney

It’s time for the royal tourney! A tourney that Brennan, who would never lie to us, has assured us will be all fun and games and only simulated danger! What could possibly go wrong?

For an exhaustive answer to what should be a rhetorical question, let’s join our PCs on the tourney grounds where they’re getting ready for their respective events.

Just to give you guys a quick rundown of who’s doing what:

Theobald is in the Joust, facing off against Lady Plumbeline.

Liam, Ruby, Lord Citron of Fructerra (Banana man), and Lady Freccia of Cerecia (Spaghetti Illithid woman) are in the archery competition.

There are two melee bouts going on:

One is a Vegetanian knight (Bonathan--french fries dude), Anabelle, Grissini, and Jet

The other is Keradin (Bulbian paladin from last ep), a Ceresian Gladiator, Scravoya (wife of the meat dude Amethar called out last episode), and Amethar.

The only person sitting out the festivities is old-man Lapin who is chilling in the high rollers box with the Pontifex, Alfredi, and some of the other important peeps we met last episode.

Lord and Lady Cruller are watching Jet’s fight and also have taken Primsy under their wing to keep her away from Stilton who Theobald has warned everyone about.

While Brennan rolls initiative for a million NPCs, the PCs mess around with the Message cantrip and Jet worries that something bad might happen to her dad during the tournament. Ruby says that, if anyone tries anything, they’ll stop it.

On to the matches!

In the first round of the archery competition, Liam does well with a 23 (he’s only beaten by Citron who gets a 25) and Ruby (who’s not really equipped for bow shooting at this distance and can’t get a magic boost without putting herself in major danger) lags behind with a 10.

In the main melee battle, Scravoya (who is fully just a t-bone steak with eyes) outright threatens Amethar and he leans into it, saying they should take out their competition so they can 1v1 each other. A very good idea but with only an 8 Persuasion roll to back it up, it doesn’t work. Amethar tries to make the same deal with Keradin but, when he’s rebuffed, goes into a rage and goes for Scravoya, hitting her for 19 points of damage. On her turn, she returns the favor for 16 points.

Jet decides to take a page from her dad’s book and tries to ally with Annabelle...by bringing up her ejection from the line of succession, her refusal to wed, and also declaring that she also won’t wed--each of those statements probably being enough to cause a scandal on its own. But even with disadvantage on Persuasion, Jet gets a 20 which means that while the crowd is scandalized, Annabelle is touched by the show of solidarity and salutes with her sabre. Then Jet hits Grissini for 21 points of damage, giving us insight into what his type is because his response is to instantly go full heart eyes for her. Doesn’t stop him from dealing a bunch of damage to Jet on his turn though.

Meanwhile, Lapin--saying it’s a request from the king--has Lord and Lady Swirly (who are in the box with him) hold comically full glasses of wine for when Amethar’s match is done, something they don’t question at all. He foregoes a “real turn” so he can act when something actually happens.

In the joust, Theobald and Lady Plumbeline run at each other and Theo super hits with a 24. The joust is supposed to be three rounds long but on a 15 Athletics to her nat 1, Theo absolutely sends her flying off her meep and ends it--and the chance at getting to name herself as a candidate for the Emperor’s successor--right then and there. He hops down off his meep to help her up but she slaps his hand away, picks herself up, fully crying, and runs off the field.

What Could Possibly Go Wrong?

Back in the main melee, Brennan asks for 3 Con saving throws from Amethar, activating both mine and Lou’s Fight or Flight. Brennan says that Amethar takes 8 piercing damage and then 22 points of damage that are not halved (even though he’s raging) which brings him down to 6 HP. And, on top of that, he’s suddenly having trouble breathing.

Zac decides that this is a good time for Lapin to take his turn but, on an 8, doesn’t notice anything is wrong. Like yeah, Amethar’s hurt but it would be weird if it wasn’t. It’s a melee. Amether also rolls Perception and, with an 8, though he knows that something sharp cut into his side when he bumped into Keradin and the gladiator (which is weird because they’re all fighting with blunted weapons) he thinks he could have just gotten scratched by their armor or something.

Liam and Jet both fail their Perception checks on their turns to notice Amethar is in dire straits.

Oh Amethar’s turn, having realized that something Weird and Bad is happening, he fully nopes out of there and Disengages so he can hop the fence to the pen where Jet’s fight is happening (the one Cruller is watching) and lie down to signal to everyone that he’s not fighting anymore and needs help.

Unfortunately for him, Scravoya fails her Wisdom save and jumps the fence to continue wailing on Amethar, knocking him unconscious.

Lapin, paying off the Looney Tunes gag that he set up on his first turn, hip checks Lord and Lady Swirlie to make them throw the wine in Alfredi’s face. While she’s distracted, he does some sneaky healing on Amethar (13 pts) which no one clocks though Brennan doesn’t tell *them* that.

Amethar, while unconscious, sees his sister Rococco in a field of wheat in the spot where she died, who tells him to get up. In the real world, he does.

On Jet’s turn, she prepares to exit the fight to help her dad. Grissini notices that she’s distressed and asks if something’s wrong. When she says that someone is trying to kill her dad, he stops fighting, throws down his weapon, and tries to get the Pontifex’s attention.

As soon as it’s his turn, Theo accesses the Speed Force, runs all the way to Amethar, and disarms Scravoya. Jet is suddenly more interested in learning a disarming blow.

Ruby runs over to Jet to help out if she needs to (and, mechanically, so their lockets are in play) and also sends Yak up to keep an eye on things.

Cruller jumps down to help stop the fighting and check on Amethar, finding that Amethar can’t speak. He calls for a healer and Keradin comes over. Ruby makes him drop his mace as he passes her but he gets there and kneels next to him.

Liam casts Detect Poison and Disease since Amethar looks pretty sick (his deception roll to hide it is only a 10, yikes) and Brennan says there’s definitely poison happening. But oh no Brennan. You’re not getting away with just that. The language of that spell says you ID the type and location of poison in range.

Brennan reads the card to confirm that his shit is thoroughly fucked and then narrates that Liam detects a poison cocktail in Amethar which delivered 22 points of poison damage (he saved so 22 was half), gives the Poisoned condition (which he also saved from), and also silences the person for an hour (which is why he can’t talk). And location? Liam smells the same poison that’s in Amethar’s body on two daggers on Keradin’s belt. Liam calls him out (without explaining what’s going on very well--luckily Theo starts yelling poison to make things more clear for the audience) and casts Hunter's Mark very openly without really disguising it.

Father in danger, Jet tries to attack Keradin but misses twice. Amethar, on his turn, gets up, goes into a rage, and hits Keradin (whose eyes go blank and soft) and then backs up from him.

Scravoya keeps fighting because she’s a woman in a rage and on a mission (rather than anything especially sinister, a previous check showed that she thinks Amethar is cheating or wussing out which is why she’s kept fighting).

Back in the box, Alfredi is still chewing out the Swirlies and not really paying attention to the other insanity going on. The Pontifex meanwhile is watching intensely and is so shocked she can’t really move or speak. Lapin yells for them to call off the fight (21 Persuasion) and, even though he probably shouldn’t be giving orders while sitting next to someone who outranks him so completely, the Pontifex ignores that and yells at Keradin to kneel and he does so immediately.

The horns blow, the fight stops--even Scravoya stops. But we’re still in initiative. Anabelle jumps over and knocks Keradin further down. Grissini starts mobilizing guards to stop anyone running away. Theo tries to get the daggers from him and fails. Luckily Ruby is next and she casts Hex (giving Keradin disadvantage to Dex) and just barely grabs the poison daggers from Keradin’s belt with help from Yak, holding them up and loudly declaring their existence to the crowd like the performer she wants to be. The daggers are made of pure water which is super deadly to sugar people. And luckily, on a nat 1, no one notices her spell. Cruller goes after the fleeing Ceresian gladiator and we exit combat.

Keradin is grabbed by guards and is double arrested by the Pontifex and Grissini in a church/state tag team. Alfredi glances at Lapin and then comes down and heals the Poison condition from Amethar.

Liam tries to do a better job at disguising his magic as just non-magical ranger knowledge but doesn’t do a great job, even with help from Ruby.

Jet tries to see if Anabelle is on the level and her read on her is shaky because it’s been a crazy like minute and a half for her. She then apologizes for inadvertently embarrassing her. Anabelle says she needs to learn to be less quick to run off at the mouth outside of Candia but she doesn’t seem to have any hard feelings (especially since her scandal is like only the 9th craziest thing that’s happened at this point).

Lapin’s Big Day

The security minded people start to arrange escorts and guards and all the stuff you do when an assassination attempt happens. Theo wants to be part of the investigation. Lapin sees Alfredi talking to the Pontifex and pointing to Liam. The Pontifex then comes over to Grissini and says that the church would see Keradin hanged for his actions. Grisinni tells her that the Candians want to talk to him first and she’s fine with that. She leaves, followed by the meat people. Before he leaves, Senator Ciabatta checks in with Amethar and, without explanation, says that he doesn’t believe Keradin acted alone.

Liam is ready to just peace out into the woods before he’s tried as a witch but Theo tells him to stay. Cruller comes back and says that they arrested the dude he had been chasing down. They decide to split up with the kids and Tartgaurd going with Amethar to lay low--and to protect Liam--while the old dude squad--Theo, Lapin, and Cruller--go to supervise whatever’s going on with Keradin so he doesn’t just get disappeared before they can talk to him. Theo gives Jet Sprinkle (whose eyes he can see through) and they split up.

Anabelle comes over and introduces herself to Amethar, calling it a great honor as her dad was good friends with him. Jet makes a comment about her thighs being weapons because she hasn’t learned anything from her talk with Anabelle (who, for the record, doesn’t disagree with the content of the statement, just the appropriateness).

Prince Cabbage also passes by and they get the sense that he was not paying attention to anything that was going on and just had it explained to him after the fact (which, dude, how do you sleep through that???? Unless he didn’t and he wasn’t paying attention for some wild, Pepe Silvia reason, but too much craziness is going on this ep for me to start Wild Mass Guessing for no reason).

Lapin lets the others know that the cat might be out of the bag re: Liam’s magic and Cruller points out that it’s way easier for the church to off him than Ruby so he’s potentially in a LOT of danger. Even the king might be powerless to stop any retribution. Theo suggests that maybe if Liam was made a knight, that would give him some protection. Lapin thinks he might be able to talk to the Pontifex about it. And if neither of those work, Cruller can try and spirit him away back to Candia.

Plans set, they go find Keradin who is chained in a dungeon guarded by Grissini and his men. Lapin does an Insight check with advantage (helped by Theo) and our boy gets a nat 20! On that nat 20, he knows that Keradin is of such unshakable faith that he is immune to being mind controlled. He’s just an extremely loyal follower of the church who’s never had an independent thought in his life.

Lapin asks for the room to be cleared so he can have a conversation with Keradin and Grissini says he’s under orders from the Pontifex to not let Keradin get-got before the church has the chance to do it. “Oh,” says Lapin. “So you’re calling me, a man of that that same church, a liar and also a murderer? Interesting.” Grissini is so cowed that even without Lapin rolling Intimidation or Persuasion, Grissini deeply apologizes and clears the room.

Lapin makes like he’s going to break him out of his chains and asks Keradin where he’s supposed to meet with his co-conspirators. On a 25 Deception (!) v. Keradin’s 3 Insight, Keradin says that there was no plan and he was supposed to just let Amethar die on the field and walk away. Lapin asks where he can get another dagger so he can complete the attack and Keradin says he got his three from Alfredi!

Information gleaned, Lapin slaps Keradin across the face and calls back in the guard, telling them to arrest Alfredi. On a 22 Persuasion, Lapin is able to get Grissini to agree to this bold order and they head out.

Keradin loses his shit and starts pulling at his chains, yelling, “Apostate!” at Lapin who leans in and drops the rawest line anyone could have at that moment.

“Where is your Bulb now?”

Medal of Honor

When Lapin DID THAT my first thought was, “Man, I wish I still had Honor Roll on my recaps so I could give it to him.” Then I remembered I make the rules here and I can do whatever the hell I want.

What an absolutely BEASTLY set of moves from Lapin. I’ve always said, Zac is quietly super smart but always hampered in-game by the himbos he chooses to play but man did he make up for every insane, “Are you my Dad?” from S1 with his CRAZY flex this episode.

One of the best things you can do as a player is do something so logical and natural and fitting that the DM can’t help but give it to you, roll be damned and he got that from Brennan this episode.

Not to mention setting up his distraction a round in advance, coming up with a *great* way to get info from Keradin (in the moment I had no idea how he was gonna play that), taking Alfredi off the board so early into the game, and that sick, sick, mic drop of a line that forced Brennan to end the episode.

He went from sitting out the entire tournament to undisputed MVP of the episode. What a champ.

*Also, would be remiss if I didn’t mention that his gag of just creepily appearing on the king’s shoulder is my fave of the season so far.

Things I’m Concerned About

Well the number one thing I’m concerned about is a thing I didn’t even notice until I rewatched for this recap. Ruby grabs two water daggers off of Keradin but then Keradin tells Lapin that Alfredi gave him three water daggers. Which means that either water daggers are one use (3 - the one he used on Amethar = 2) OR, both more likely (assuming max drama at least) and troubling, there’s a third dagger floating around out there. And that’s such an easy thing to miss in the heat of the moment when you’re playing. So the question is, who has that third dagger? It would be weird if Alfredi had it--why give it right back to the person who gave it to you? If this is a Bubian conspiracy, maybe one of the other officials like Onionpatch--he would be an unexpected candidate. Either way, I hope someone clocked that bit of info or will soon because that’s a dangerous thing to just be lurking.

I’m concerned about how far down this rabbit hole goes (pun unintended but consciously retained). When Brennan said Keradin’s eyes went blank and soft during the struggle, I was thinking maybe mind control but he’s apparently immune to mind control (which I think means he’s at least a level 8 Paladin since that’s when they gain immunity to charm spells and abilities--so I guess he was just surprised at the turn of events in that moment and that’s what that was?). So how corrupt is this church? Does it go all the way to the Pontifex? Do they want a specific person on the throne or do they just not want a Candian on the throne since they’re well known for being lax with enforcing the magic restrictions, something the church would surely hate.

I’m concerned Theo might have inadvertently made an enemy of Plumbeline. Or, like, driven her to do something rash. Like, we know he was just being a good guy but she was obv not in a good headspace in that moment. It wasn’t a bad move from him--if she’d reacted well it would have been a good relationship to have, but the dice just weren’t on his side.

I’m concerned about what it will take before the children start thinking about the ~implications~ of their actions. Like, Jet airing royal laundry and declaring to not marry in front of everybody and Liam not even trying to hide his Hunter’s Mark at Keradin? This is the Actions Have Consequences season! I keep saying that and I’m sure it’s gonna continue until someone dies! And speaking of..

Like...come on. It’s gotta happen, right? And the longer they murder-block Brennan, the worse it’s gonna be when it happens! And like...I realllllly wouldn’t want to be Liam right now. It occurs to me that this would be a good opportunity to throw Liam under the bus for Ruby’s sake. Not saying they SHOULD do it obviously or that they would--in fact they started doing the opposite immediately. But if my main thought was protecting Ruby, I would accuse Liam--son of the traitor who openly did magic at the royal tournament--of having done the magic on the road, and that clears Ruby and he’s a much easier scapegoat.

Five Six More Things

Very funny that Ally basically only refers to Anabelle as, “the hot one”. Like that’s the only thing about her that stuck.

Let’s say Plumbeline had won and put her name up for consideration. Do you think her dad would have named her over Amethar? Like, I’m sure Amethar would be fine with it seeing as he doesn’t really want the job but I dunno.

What would win? An intricately plotted assassination attempt or a level 1 spell and a disengage action? LOL, RIP Brennan. Truly, Brennan was thwarted at every turn this episode. Amethar running away alleviated the need for everyone to make some near impossible Perception checks. Theo Usain Bolting over and disarming Scravoya. Liam clocking the poison stopped Keradin from doing any funny business and narrowed their suspects to one instead of literally everyone on the field. Ruby grabbing the daggers made it clear what was going on and showed that they were the victims of an attack not whatever all that nonsense looked like out of context. If they had played this any differently, Amethar would probably be dead. And, at no point watching that do you get the sense that this was a planned story event they were meant to get through shaken but unscathed. Brennan was gunning for him (“Stop trying to kill my dad!/Stop having you dad be the king!/Fuck you!/Fuck you!”).

I think it is very endearing that Grissini, upon hearing that Jet needed help, immediately started to wildly flag down the Pontifex but, upon actually talking to the Pontifex later, was very formal and hesitant, showing that he really just dropped all his inhibitions and social graces to help Jet in that moment.

What an INSANE thing to witness as an attendee of this tournament. Like, truly a year’s worth of drama within about 2 minutes. WILD.

Emily and Siobhan have a quick conversation about whether Alfredi is working with the cheese bandits where Emily cites, “Pasta with cream sauce” as evidence and if this season’s plot twists occur in such a way that they can be retroactively tracked by something like “foods that go together,” I am going to scream. I am also fully prepared for this to be the case.

#dimension 20 #dimension 20 spoilers #a crown of candy #a crown of candy spoilers #the royal report

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ashes4bones · 4 years ago

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Foggy dystopia

In a historical world

We have theatrical ways -

Every individual seems to have

A role, dictated by past stereotypes...

One is cast quite randomly -

You don’t get to choose between poor or wealthy -

All you can do is try to stomach

What card you’ve been dealt, at least in public.

So I wonder when people confort me

How much of it is insincerity

And how much of it is an honest,

genuine friendship promise...

It’s hard to tell.

It’s like the whole world is a big poker game,

Where so many people cheat

That you begin to doubt your neighbors.

The worst is everyone has the same questions that go unanswered

The same misguided trust for the few hiding their chips

And if we could all agree to show our cards

We would be blessed with unwelcome knowledge -

For who wants to open their blind eyes

To truly see the unmasked faces of our supposéd allies?

It’s almost as if people prefer to see colorful masquerades

Instead of seeing the bare, scarce truth of the world.

They would rather live in a peaceful moquerie with their doubts of the honesty of others, busy holding up their own disguise,

Than unravel a world founded on the ashes of their dreams.

For when there’s smoke, there’s fire, or so the saying goes,

Yet we refuse to become our own firemen and extinguish the flames of a relentless, brazing lie, even when it consumes our children’s innocence...

Our fear of the scattered ashes of who we are is somehow greater than our fear of the very flames destroying that being, and so it spreads like wildfire, and we clutch on to the beautiful lies woven onto our hearts, while the reflection of dancing, festive flames come alive within our souls.

The fire engulfs our shadows, one’s most faithful follower, then proceeds to consume our soul, its most formidable rebel. Once this is done, it feasts on our conscience, until eventually, there isn’t much left behind the shell of our projections.

I look around and wonder who among my allies have been ravaged by lazy fumes

But all I can see are the ravenous smiles of murderously pampered façades.

I decide that if I cannot find other victims, I can at least try and save myself, and so I cough my way down the sewage of what should be my conscience and search, search for a person I wouldn’t know how to recognize.

And that’s when I wake up from a lugubrious nightmare, and by instinct look around, hunting for the glimpse of a shadow. In the lingering darkness of the night, I am unable to find the hint of the shadow I used to play with as a child. I would almost turn the light on - just to make sure - but it is late, and I must sleep. Besides, I can always look tomorrow...

“I am just an impulsive person who thinks to much”, I tell myself, and with that, I lay on my warm, sweaty mattress and sleepily close my eyes.

#foggy dystopia #hypocracy #poems on tumblr #poets corner #disillusionment #everyone is hiding #pokerface #sad boi hours #nightmare #fire #wildfire #society

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steadypatrolchild · 4 years ago

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Lego Star Wars 3 Wii Game Cheat Codes

LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars Cheats. The insanely popular and better-than-bad LEGO Star Wars series returns, this time covering the Clone Wars that were featured in the popular animated series.

Lego Star Wars 2 Cheats

Lego Star Wars 3 Wii Game Cheat Codes Ps4

This page contains LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars cheats list for WII version. Now we have 3 cheats in our list, which includes 1 easter egg, 1 glitch, 1 secret. We hope information that you'll find at this page help you in playing LEGO Star Wars III: The Clone Wars on WII platform. If you didn't find needed cheats put request or ask. Cheats, Tips, Tricks, Walkthroughs and Secrets for Lego Star Wars 3: The Clone Wars on the Xbox 360, with a game help system for those that are stuck. The best place to get cheats, codes, cheat codes, walkthrough, guide, FAQ, unlockables, tricks, and secrets for Lego Star Wars 3: The Clone Wars for Nintendo Wii. This page contains Cheats for Lego Star Wars 3: The Clone Wars organized by sections for Nintendo Wii. This game has 'Action Adventure' as genre, made by Traveller's Tales, released on Mar 22, 2011. If you can't find a hint or secret in our list, then please check this page periodically for the latest updates.

Cheats |

Unlockables |

Hints |

Easter Eggs |

Glitches |

Get the latest Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga cheats, codes, unlockables, hints, Easter eggs, glitches, tips, tricks, hacks, downloads, hints, guides, FAQs, walkthroughs, and more for Wii (Wii). CheatCodes.com has all you need to win every game you play!

Use the above links or scroll down see all to the Wii cheats we have available for Lego Star Wars: The Complete Saga.

Buy the Red Brick Detector

If you go through Mos Espa Podrace, when youpass the giant holes go on the far left side andgrab the Red Brick. Once you get it save up250, 000 studs and go to the extras section atthe counter in the cantina and purchase it.

Play As Car

Only on two player. Have one person get in the car and start driving around. Then have a second person, most effective as a jedi or sith, keep pressing the change person button while facing the car, while the car is moving. Once it shows that the second person isn't in control of anything, have the first person get out of the car, and the second person can pay as the car. It only works if the person in the car is second player, while the person to turn into the car is first player.

300,000 Studs Or More

Go to episode 3 chapter 1. Chose droid tri-fighter. After you shoot the first set of guns,crash. Keep doing this until you have 300,000studs or more.

Unlocking Stuff

My advice is to play through the levels first thengo back and play it 'free play'. This way you willhave the characters you need to get into specialareas.

Extra Lightsaber Damage Combo (Wii Only)

This move only works on lightsabers, but if you press the B button AND swing the Wii remote, it will create extra damage (you have to time your swings, don't just attack randomly)you can create different combos yourself like B+B+Swing.Also if you swing the Wii to do a super-smash (double-jump+attack) it will create more damage.You'll have to practice a lot to get it perfect (remember; timing is everything) but it really comes in handy in two-player duel and things like that.(P. S . The third attack, or final blow, can cut through anything on a person, even if they are blocking of are a droiddekka with their shield on. ).

Red Brick In Mos Espa Spaceport

To get the red brick in the mos espa level in episode 4, head forward right when the level starts. Right when you walk under the broken bridge turn left. Then with Luke or Obi-Wan, destroy all trash can's in front of the wall. Then you should see a little door with nothing behind it. Use the force with Obi-Wan to take the parts off the ground and put them on the wall. There then should be a panel with R2's face on it. Activate the panel with R2, walk in the door and you then should have unlocked a special secret.

Throwing/Pushing Enemies Into Walls/Trees

Switch to a person that is from the Dark Side, (Darth Vader, Emperor, etc.) and force him using Z. Do not hold him into the Air for a long time or they will die. While in the air, push him intoa wall/tree, and he will die. It is almost like a Jedi pushing droids.

Ghost Character

To buy the ghost character, you need to all-the-way complete story mode/All Episodes.He cannot get hurt and is not paid any attention by troopers, unless in cars.

Unlimited Studs

If you go to level one of episode IV in The Complete Saga there will be a machine with a lever. Pull the lever and out come about 10 silver studs. You can keep doing this to get money but it is slow so you may want a studs x cheat on. So far this has worked and is a good way to get cash.

StarKiller

Go to build-a-character and select luke's head, darth maul's body, black waist, legs and hands, skin arms black hair and a red lightsaber and then you have STARKILLER as a playable character!

Random Stormtrooper Sounds

First go to the level 'Jedi Destiny' and select any character. Then when you take out the all of the Emporer's hearts ECEPT two. Then (make sure you have extra toggle turned on) change to the Imperial Egineer and jump once and then you'll here Stormtrooper noises.

Minikit Detector

Go to 'Cloud City Trap' (Episode 5) throw bomb atmetal gate beside R2D2 picture (unlockable point).The minikit detector is behind where the gate was.

Cheats Listing

Type in AASDF.

R2-q5

Type in bobazxc.

Boss Nass

Type in GIJ989 at the bar.

Tie Interceptor

Type in HUT845 at the bar.

Boss Nass

Enter CLZ738 at the cantina.

Battle Droid Commander

Type in H6J9P56

Darth Maul

Type in BDC866 at the bar.

Rules of The Cheat, How to Play the Card Game To play the Cheat card game, you need: A deck of 32 or 52 cards (which can be doubled depending on the number of players). Be at least 2 players. The rules of cheat card game. Any player who suspects that the card discarded by a player do not match the rank called can challenge the play by calling 'Cheat!' Then the cards played by the challenged player are exposed and one of two things happens: 1. If they are all of the rank that was called, the challenge is false, and the challenger must pick up the whole discard pile.

General Grevious

Type in EVILR2 at the bar.

General Grievous

GGF539 or ACK646

Tie Fighter

Prx482

Padme

Lum521

Adi Mundi

CUH850

Disguise

Mbox 2 number pad tv game cheats 9. Type in ZZR636 at the bar.

Count Dooku

Type in HJF584 at the bar.

Zam's Speeder

Type in PLL967 at the bar.

Ewok

Type in NBN431 at the bar.

Jango Fett

Type in AAB123 at the bar.

Captain Tarpals

Type in HHY697 at the bar.

Force Grapple Leap

Collector

Complete the game to 100%

Secret Master

Sell your landspeeder to the Jawas.

A New Hope

Finish Episode VI in story mode.

Undecided.

Crossover: Destroy Jango Fett with Boba Fett

Arcade Master

Shoot First

Unlock Indiana Jones

Go into the 'Bonus' doorway in the Cantina, then go through the door markedTrailers and watch the trailer for Lego Indiana Jones. You can then buy him for$50,000.

The Phantom Menace

Finish Episode II in story mode.

Revenge Of The Sith

Finish Episode V in story mode.

Going For Gold

Collect all mini-kits.

Lightsaber Master

Perform 200 perfect lightsaber deflections.

Dodger

Destroy 300 stormtroopers.

Droid Slayer

Lego Star Wars 2 Cheats

Destroy 50 TIE fighters.

Yee Haw

Break Jar Jar 20 times.

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Destroy 5 people with one attack (Jedi super slam).

Harmless?

Lego Star Wars 3 Wii Game Cheat Codes Ps4

Destroy 10 characters with one thermal detonator.

Let The Wookiee Win

Set off all three Discos.

Use The Force Luke

Start a Cantina Fight with 50 casualties.

Lego Build-master

Max out the Stud counter

Cloud Cover

Wear Every Hat

Unfaithful

Revenge: Destroy The Emperor with Mace Windu

Nobody Expects….

Revenge: Destroy Anakin with Dooku

Who Needs Obi-wan?

Revenge: Destroy Darth Vader with Obi Wan

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writings-of-the-unkown · 5 years ago

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Who Ever Said Rivals Shouldn’t Be in Love Has Never Met Us

request: yes

pairing : Tobin Heath x Reader

Y/N- your name

Y/L- your last name

Warning: some swears(F-word two or three times), gay, injuries?, ANGST sorry not sorry :|

972 Words

A/N: THIS IS FICTION ALL MISTAKES ARE MINE

I never thought that my personal life would crossover with my work life. Well except when I started dating Tobin, considering we both play soccer in the NWSL. I play out in Orlando with Alex, Ali, and Ashlyn, while Tobin plays for Portland with Meghan, Lindsey, Emily, and Adrianna. We don’t really see each other often but we do a lot of Skyping/FaceTiming.

“Hey Y/N, so glad we got to see each other. I’ve got something to tell you” Tobin said, after I picked up the call.

“Of course love, what’s up?” my accent pokes through more when I get nervous.

“So here’s the thing. The team went out last night and I had a few too many drinks. I don’t think it went any further than a make out session, but I’m telling you this in hopes that you won’t entirely kill me” Tobin said somberly. “Baby please say something”.

“I’ll have to call you later, the girls just came back so I gotta go” I said as I hung up on her.

“Hey what’s up Y/N? Do anything fun while we were out?” Ash laughed.

“Wait Y/N are you crying? What’s wrong hun?” I didn’t even register that I was crying until Ali brought attention to it.

“Tobin called, she-” I attempted to breathe as both Ali and Ash sat beside me on the couch. Ash had her hand on my knee and Ali had her arm around my shoulders and she was slightly squeezing me. “She cheated on me. I just can’t believe this” I turned into Ali’s shoulder and cried a little bit harder in that moment.

I don’t really remember what happened after that. But the next day we had a game, and guess who it was against. That’s right, Portland and Tobin. I really didn’t want to see her but I still have to play.

We got to the stadium and we went into the locker room. I sat next to Carson because my number is 15 so I was just gonna sit with my music, but she had a different idea. Ash was DJing for the whole team, so Carson decided to drag me up to dance with her.

The game starts and Tobin had the ball. She lead the attack and was coming straight towards me. I stepped up to challenge but she basically ran me over. I hit the ground hard, my neck snapped up from the impact of the hit, and my vision went black.

I felt someone lay their hand on my shoulder.

“Y/L, can you hear me? Try to open your eyes” a voice asked quietly.

I cracked my eyes open and focused on Ali, Ash, and Carson peering down on me. Ash helped me sit up. The med staff came over and pulled me off the field. They gave me the concussion test which I cleared me. I stood by the fourth official. The center ref waves me on and I immediately get the ball from Ali. I run down the sideline until Tobin marks me. I tried to nutmeg her, but that didn’t work out so well. She tripped me and I hit the ground once again. It seems as if she has it out for me and I was not going to tolerate her behavior any more. I hopped to my feet and got right into her face. Fear flashed over Tobin’s face.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing? You know that I don’t fucking deserve this shitty treatment! First you fucking cheat on me, then you almost give me a fucking concussion! What the hell has gotten into!?!? This is not the Tobin I was planning to ask to marry me” I screamed at her. Alex got me to turn away from her and Alex motioned for Ali and Carson to come get me before the ref could give me a card.

“Were you really planning on proposing? Cause that would be---ow Ali what was that for? Carson complained after what I assume was Ali smacking her.

“Yeah I was because she was the love of my life” I said as sadness dripped from every word.

I was subbed out at halftime because my headache had gotten worse and the team doctor wanted to get me checked out by a neurologist. On the drive to the hospital after the game, my mind kept wandering to thoughts of Tobin. It is kind of a blessing in disguise that we play for different national teams. I’m sure my teammates will get a kick out of my despair at our next team camp.

When we got to the hospital, they checked me out and said that I did have a very minor concussion. They admitted me for observation. I told the team doc that he could leave but I also asked him to let Ali, Ash and Carson know what happened.

I sat in the dark and was eventually taken over by my thoughts. I was broken out by a knock on the door. My eyes could identify the silhouette of a person and they walked in.

“Hey Y/N, I’m not sure if you’re awake but I just wanted to apologize for the way I have been acting recently. I’m sorry, you don’t deserve to be treated the way I have been treating recently. I understand if you want to break up” Tobin had tears streaming down her face.

“Love, I am hurt by your decisions but I meant what I said out on the field. I was going to propose and I still am but please give me time to process what happened. Afterall, you did give me a concussion” I said with a smile.

“Anything for you Babe” Tobin whispered after she placed a gentle kiss on my forehead.

I fell asleep in Tobin’s arms that night and for the first time in a long while, I was truly happy.

After all, who ever said that rivals shouldn’t be in love has never met us.

#requested #tobin heath #tobin heath x reader #fanfic #uswnt #uswnt imagines #this is fiction

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praphit · 5 years ago

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BAMFs of 2019

Here's last year’s CHAMP -

THANOS

(Thanos: ”WTF did you just say?” #Mood)

Let's see if he made it back.

But, first, let’s take a look at some honorable mentions, as well as some people who were trying too hard:

Rey -

Of course she is a total BAMF. So, why isn't she on this list? 3 REASONS: 1) She looks like a racist ex that I once dated. How can someone who decided to date you (a black man) be racist? Did y'all see the movie "Get Out"? You didn't know that the story was based off one of my relationships did you? So, yeah, she ain't ever gettin on this list.

2) The force is cheating - their I said it.

3) This last movie sucked. This rap she did didn't help her cause.

ALSO - there’s this - her rapping. I repeat, she ain’t ever getting on this list.

Nic Cage - cuz he's Nic bleepin Cage

Cardi B - cuz she’s Cardi bleepin B

Hooded Justice - if only he had been in more episodes. A black man disguising himself in a hood, as well as white, to fight evil in his neighborhood, that the police force (of which he is a part of) refuses to stop. Hell yeah! I love "Watchmen".

Lupita! - her brilliantly scary performance in "Us" is def BAMF material.

The Rock - honestly, The Rock is so awesome, and has been for so long, that he needs to be extra awesome to make it.

Trying too Hard. Please STOP:

Batwoman -

I like Ruby, but she's like an elf. She's an elf model. It's not bad to be an elf model, but... If a villain in Gotham, let's say "Bane"

has me cornered, and Batwoman shows up to "rescue me", Imma start praying. He'd swing her around by that red hair of hers until her head pops off.

Rambo - He’s like 80! C’mon, Sly. Please STOP.

Dark Phoenix - a movie about her temper tantrum

Joker -

- not with all of that awkward dancing he was doing

NOW, finally, the top Bad Ass Muthas of 2019!

12) Greta -

Say what you will about climate change, but you can't deny her passion and dedication, and how inspiring it is (unless you're Prez Trump or Fox News) to see and hear a kid like her do her thing. I admit that her winning the honor of "Person of the Year" is too much. But, we all wish our kids would be this dedicated to what they believe is positive change. Plus, she has a kickass soundtrack. Gets me hyped every time!

11) Dave Chappelle

Back in the day, comedians used to be brought on stage, tasked with the difficult job of making a room full of different types of people laugh. Now, it's not just about the job of jokes, but you have to do so without offending anyone, and with clean living. When did we start holding a comedian's behavior to a higher standard than we do elected officials? Dave saw this, and kept doing what made him popular anyway. In a world where most comedians are running scared from difficult topics, Dave plunges right in. BAD ASS.

10) Linda Hamilton -

Old as bleep! We have what's-her-face here,

who is kinda badass herself, but despite being a badass cyborg (or whatever the hell she is), she still felt the need to ask for help from Linda bleepin Hamilton. LH traded her Hospice bingo card in for some guns and went to town on some machines! It'd be like if your home was being surrounded by aliens, and despite you having some fire power in your home and 911 at your disposal, everyone's first thought is to call grandma. That'd have to be one BAMF of a granny!

9) Masvidal -

Allow me to describe this brotha to y'all who might not know.

Some guy was talkin smack to Masvidal, and that guy got kneed in the face by Masvidal (fastest knock out in UFC history = 5 secs). Some guy was arrogant enough to say he was the baddest mofo around, and Masvidal scheduled a fight with this dude for a literal baddest mofo around belt. Plus, that same night of the fight, when he was talking to the media after he had won, he started mocking Conor McGregor, talkin bout Conor don't want none of this. He was talking trash, publicly, about Conor, while people were feeding him pizza. BADASS!

If there is ever a fork in the road, and on one side you see The Rock, Jason Statham, and Will Smith chasing after you, and the other you have Masvidal sitting down, eating a slice of pizza, you had better take your chances with the three action heroes over this BAMF.

8) Nunes -

If you don't know who she is, I wouldn't be surprised. The UFC botched her marketing before and after she fought and beat (badly) Ronda Rousey - yeah, RONDA ROUSEY; remember her? Nunes pretty much ended her career.

The UFC was so certain that Ronda was going to win, and so shocked when she lost, that they missed an opp to get behind a fighter who is better than Ronda (though mad respect for Ronda), and is currently holding TWO belts (first woman to do so). ALSO, she's the first openly gay UFC champ in history. She's so sweet too! - well, unless you're locked in the octagon with her, then she turns into a werewolf.

7) MANDO

I don't know about you, but all of this talk of teamwork from comic book movies can be a bit tiresome. The Avengers, The Justice League, The X-Men. Everybody wants to form a band. What happened to solo acts? What happened to lone rangers? People may say "There's no I in TEAM." Yeah, that's the prob! What about I?! Sometimes, you're Justin Timberlake, and the rest of the group is simply holding you back. That's Mando. He's Disney's updated (non-racist, unless you’re talkin drones) Lone Ranger. He doesn't need teamwork (maybe a weekly cameo, and a baby tag-along, but that's it!). He has beaten up gangs of robots, burnt people up, taken people out Jason Voorhees style, cut people in half, blown people up, blown off heads, BUT because it's Disney, we haven't seen any of that good stuff. He'd be higher on this list if they gave my man an R-rating.

6) Capt Marvel -

Captain Marvel is definitely the most powerful person on this list. She is probably also the fiercest person on this list. In Endgame, when she saw her black daddy (Nick Fury) on the screen, talkin bout Thanos snapped him away, and then something snapped inside of her, and she said "I'm going to go kill that mofo." The Avengers accompanied her, but I don't think she would have needed their help. She didn't really need their help in the final showdown with Thanos. He threw her aside, but you know she was coming back, until Tony got in her way. She is so fiery that it wouldn't surprise me if in her sequel, she goes back in time in order to rematch Thanos by herself, to prove her dominance. The reason that she's not higher on the list is because she's so damned destructive. She's just like The Hulk in the fact that she shows up to destroy everything. Now, she's a lot more focused than The Hulk, but she's so powerful that she does more damage. And she doesn't have much of a personality (so far), so it's hard to gauge her badassery of attitude, you know?? Like, if you're a villain, and you get in the way of a gorilla, that gorilla will destroy you in a very spectacularly badass way, but... it's a gorilla, you know??

I’M NOT CALLING HER A GORILLA. Don’t go snitching on me to her.

I just don’t know if she’s a hero or simply has anger management issues. Is she badass or too powerful not to do badass things?

Either way, RESPECT... or she'll come for that ass.

TIME FOR A BREAK -

Let’s break from all of this badassery with some cuteness

Look how cute it is - I CAN’T TAKE IT!

Ok, back to action.

5) Iron Man -

Look, Iron-Man started this shit! Who knows what would have become of the MCU had Robert Downey Jr. blew it. Tony Stark assembled the team (granted, he was partly the reason for the break-up), he gave us Spider-Man (with that suit) (he also gave us Ultron, but let's not get bogged down with details), he held his own against Thanos in "Infinity War",

Dr. Strange thought HIM worthy of saving, and no way time travel would have worked in "Endgame" without him. Plus, in the very end, he out-smarted Thanos, and countered Thanos' one-liner ("I am inevitable.") with his own ("And I... [five minutes later - I swear that's what it felt like] am Iron-Man.").

Paid the ultimate sacrifice. Hell yeah, he's on this list. I felt kinda bad for his wife. After IM3, she was barely around. And when Tony died, she was barely comforted... cuz nobody knew her. Oh, well.. she be aiight.

4) Thanos -

This dude saw his demise coming, and still went straight ahead towards the foes who cut his head off. BADASS! He was exceptionally crafty in playing The Avengers and blowing up their base. Then, he was just sitting around waiting for the main Avengers (Capt, Iron, and Fat Thor). He wanted to gloat a bit first. BADASS! And had Gamora not betrayed him, and had given him the gaunlet, he would have beaten The Avengers AGAIN!

He even died with a cool pose (he took a knee and got his "Thinking Man" on). BADASS!

3) Arya Stark -

This young lady scared the bleep out of me. She has my fear AND respect. I was actually scared for whomever her current target was... I was like "Run, fool! She gonna get ya! Damn, Arya, you didn't have to do them like that!"

Now, I know I talked about Ruby Rose being a ridiculous choice for Batwoman, but if Arya Stark left on a voyage to Gotham and became Batwoman, I'd buy that. I can see her killing Bane very slowly. This woman is a frickin psychopath, and I love it. She's fearless! She also went up against the top cheese of the white walkers. Y'all remember that badass move she had at the end!

YES! I only wish she had said something cool when she took him out, like... "You've been Starked." No, that's terrible, but something like that. I wish she was the one sitting on the throne, but they... you know... did what they did.

2) Capt America -

I think that it's fair to say that Capt America was the rock of The Avengers After the snap, he was the only one to keep his shit together; he actually worked to help others keep their shit together.

Meanwhile, Widow is crying in the dark every night while having a PB sandwich and bourbon dinner. And she just gave up on her hair.

Thor became an alcoholic.

And you could say Hulk was ok, but... was he?

I mean, that ain't right. This is avoidance behavior if I've ever seen it.

But, Capt kept it together. Then, that fight with Thanos at the end was one of, if not THE best one on one fight of the series. Using both Thor weapons, meaning he was both badass on a fighting level and a righteousness level - which ain't easy to accomplish. And when he straped tight his shield in that trailer, and gritted his teeth - hell yeah!

Chills. Capt to Thanos: You motha bleeper"

1) John Wick -

Three movies with no time in-between to shower, sleep, take a piss, brush his teeth, NOTHING! His life for the last few years (it seems like) has been running, lurking, hiding, beating ass.. and beating ass some more. Lord knows what this dude's kill count is up to. His nickname is "Baba Yaga" Have y'all seen what the actual Baba Yaga looks like?

Terrifying. And yet, not as terrifying as John Wick when he's angry at you.

The amount of endurance and focus that has gone into this long stint of murdering (only fueled by rage and a few shots of bourbon from time to time) is uncanny.

In JW3 he makes a guy eat a book (imagine what must be done to a person's jaw for that to happen), he gets shot, stabbed, hit my two cars (seconds within each other)... Nah, y'all ain't hear me! TWO CARS! The people in the cars were trying to kill him! He fought two super ninjas - like IP Man caliber, he beat up an army of soldiers, crawled through a desert, got shot by a friend who betrayed him, fell off of a building (bouncing around a few times before hitting the pavement), and was somehow still good to schedule a fourth movie after all of that - which I assume will pickup right there.

He doesn't have any superpowers (though you wouldn't know), but his tenacity is to be envied, and outdoes everyone else's on this list.

BAMF!!!

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themcuhasruinedme · 5 years ago

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Vintage Film Fest (Pt. 4)(End)

[Summary]: You and Steve have been dating for a while and you surprise him with a pair of tickets to a vintage film festival as an anniversary date

[Pairing]: Steve x reader

[Word Count]: 3,795

Tagging: @theashhole @dividedwecantfall @peterman-parker @avengerofyourheart @nataliarxmanxva @metalarmproblems @queenbbarnes @carol-damn-vers @imagine-assembling-the-avengers @that-sokovian-bastard @hellomissmabel @abovethesmokestacks @peculiar-persephone @bellameys @beccaanne814 @hymnofthevalkyrie @buckys-shield @callamint @redgillan @angelicthor @iwillbeinmynest @theassetseyeliner @lilasiannerd @aubzylynn @sgtbxckybxrnes @iamwarrenspeace @marvelrevival @httpmcrvel @avengersnthings @feelmyroarrrr @girl-next-door-writes @honey-bee-holly @patzammit

A/N: Well, our vintage film fest has finally come to an end.. I hope you all enjoyed reading (and possibly watching) all these wonderful movies I mentioned, as they are all very near and dear to my heart in some way or another. And once again, I encourage you guys to watch the movies and shorts I mention in this as they are all wonderful and amazing (heads up though: some of them are silent!) and all can be found on YouTube.

Pt.1 | Pt.2 | Pt.3

You couldn’t believe that night four was here already. It seemed like just yesterday that the film fest started and you were looking forward to enjoying all these movies and shorts with Steve. But like anything and everything, all good things must come to an end.

When it was time for you and Steve to drive to the theater, you slowly walked to the car while Steve tried to rush you.

“Everything ok, [Y/N]?”

“Yea,” you sighed. “It’s just that I can’t believe that it’s our final night for this.”

Steve gave you a small smile and wrapped you in his arms as a tear slid down your cheek.

“Hey, it’s ok!” he said as he brushed the tear away with his thumb then lifting your chin up so your eyes met. “There will be other festivals to go to. I’ll make sure that we find more.” He gave you a kiss on your forehead and you hugged each other tightly for a couple minutes in the driveway.

“Alright, hun. Let’s go,” he whispered.

The drive over was a quiet one and when the two of you walked in to the theater, it was about half full already. Finding seats close to the middle, you let Steve go get the snacks while you played some games on your phone and patiently waited for him to come back.

Handing you a box of Reese’s Pieces again along with a king sized box of Sour Patch Kids, you looked at him with the biggest smile you could muster.

“Anything to make that smile happen,” he said as he sat down and placed the drinks in the cup holders.

He intertwined his fingers with yours and you placed your head on his shoulder which then prompted him to place a soft, delicate kiss to the top of your head. Your smile got a bit bigger as another tear slid down to the tip of your nose.

You wiped it away and sniffled a bit when the lights went down, it was time for the last night of movies to start. And what a way to start off the last night but with one of Harold Lloyd’s most notable short called An Eastern Westerner.

For you, it was always a delight watching Harold Lloyd, especially his glasses character that they call “The Boy”. There was just something about his all-American persona in that character that you couldn’t quite put your finger on but all you knew what that you loved that character nonetheless.

The theater was quiet until the second title card appeared: “H-o-m-e spells home, but the Boy never did care much for spelling.” which then made the whole audience roar with laughter. And the laughter continued as you all watched the Boy get in trouble over doing the shimmy in a dance hall that prohibited it.

It then became quiet again as you all watched him come home late, get in trouble with his father and get told that he needs to visit his uncle out West where it will get rid of his “wild shenanigans”.

Laughter filled the theater once more when the title card popped up for the town that the Boy was to go: “The little town of Piute Pass. It’s considered bad form to shoot the same man twice on the same day.” But it quickly turned to gasps from the kids as they showed a group of bandits hold up the towns saloon and then over-dramatically get bullied by the saloon owner.

Watching as they showed the Girl, the Boys soon to be sweetheart, get work in the saloon, the Boy chase his ride all the way into town and then try to impress the Girl with rope twirling and horse riding but failing miserably, there were laughs all around.

There were even more laughs when the Boy went into the saloon, almost got shot, got a little to flirty with a dancer, was forced to play a poker game, attempted to roll his own cigarette (and made five instead) and practically cheat at the poker game by disguising himself as a waiter.

(gif credit goes to @ren-field)

Gasps and laughter were mixed during the ending chase scene after the Boy had saved the Girl’s father and the saloon owner got upset over it. But when the ending came, there were aww’s from every corner of the theater as the Boy drew a line across the Girl’s left ring finger.

The first break happened and you and Steve waited patiently for the next one to start. Slowly eating more of your Reese’s Pieces, you decided to stick a few in Steve’s mouth which came with some laughs and much needed hugs.

As soon as the lights went down for the second movie to start and seeing the title card for it immediately put a smile on your face. Charlie’s most famous short called The Immigrant was one of your favorites. His Tramp character could always put a smile on your face no matter how bad you were feeling.

Laughs started right away seeing the Tramp hanging over the side of the boat, making it look like he was seasick until he brought a fish into view, smiling as he held on to his catch then losing it into a sleeping crowd. More laughs happened as he tried to walk on deck but swayed with the boat with each step he took.

Even more laughs came while the audience watched him try to eat dinner in the swaying dining room where he could hardly stand, lost his footing (along with his meal) and immediately fell for a pretty girl on the boat.

Suddenly gasps filled the theater from all the kids as they watched a man steal from a sleeping old lady but the cheers and aww’s rang out when they watched the Tramp give his money to the girl, who happened to be the old lady’s daughter.

Quietness filled the theater as the audience watched the boat sail into New York’s harbor and the Tramp say goodbye to the girl and her mother. But it was quickly filled with laughter again as the Tramp went to go eat, had a hat issue with the headwaiter, eat his bowl of beans one at a time and have the guy sitting next to him get irritated by it all.

(gif credit goes to @maudit)

Aww’s and smiles came again when the Tramp met the girl from the boat in the restaurant, sitting at the table next to him but quickly turned to gasps as the audience watched a customer get roughed up and thrown out of the place because he was short on his bill.

Laughs came and went even more when the Tramp tried to pay for his and the girl’s food but the coin he had was a fake and he kept falling out of his seat from disbelief whenever the headwaiter tried to grab his shirt collar. But as luck would have it, someone “paid” the bill for them and then the Tramp and the girl got married later that day.

Cheers came as the screen went black and the lights went on. You and Steve each took turns going to the restroom to make sure no one took your spots, even though there wasn’t really an empty seat anywhere.

When the lights went down for the next movie to start, you were happy to see that they had one more Buster movie, called The Passionate Plumber, set up for the festival. This was another one of your favorite talking ones from him, even though it was another MGM film but this was another one of those that Buster fans considered to be good. In fact, some fans considered it to be his best of the talking movies and you certainly did as well.

The laughs were a plenty with this one, starting with Buster’s character, Elmer, going to fix a leaky shower in some fancy dames house but as things usually went, it didn’t go smoothly. The girl’s lover, Tony, caught Elmer in the bathroom and accused Patricia of her having a lover on the side, which caused Tony to get jealous, arrange a duel with Elmer and bring out his gloves, slapping Elmer across the face, which in turn Elmer slapped him using the only thing he had on him; his towel.

Laughs continued when the duel between Elmer and Tony happened, especially when Elmer kept bringing out his glove and slapping everyone. You could hear some sighs throughout the theater when it showed Buster in a polo shirt and one of those deadpan, yet astonishingly beautiful, expressions on his face. One of those sighs even came from you unknowingly and Steve quickly squeezed your hand to make you snap out of your dream state.

“Hey, I thought I was the only one that could make you swoon?” Steve teased. You nudged his arm and smiled, focusing your attention back to the screen. You heard a few gasps from the kids when it showed that Tony had another girl, named Nina, making it seem to her that he was married to Patricia and that he wanted to be with Nina.

But the laughs soon continued for the next 15 minutes as the audience watched Elmer try to show his new gun invention to the French Army General which made it seem like an assassination attempt because he kept having to bring the gun out, trying to get into the casino that the General was in and finally succeeding, causing chaos in the casino as only Buster can after waving his gun around yet agin to the General, then stealing someones car and smashing it, only to have the chauffeur come over screaming and yelling which made Elmer bring out his gloves once more.

The theater then became quiet as you all watched Patricia ask Elmer to help her get rid of Tony by becoming her “make believe” lover. But the laughter filled it yet again when Elmer silently grabbed Tony’s hat to make it look like he just came in and started kissing Patricia, making Tony upset and hitting the top of Elmer’s hat. The laughter got even harder when once again the gloves came out to do more slapping.

Laughs came and went throughout the rest of the movie as you watched Patricia try to leave and be with Tony but Elmer was constantly there making sure she wouldn't be able to go anywhere, Patricia’s aunt coming over for a surprised visit, a small cat fight breaking out between Nina and Patricia to only find out Tony was playing both of them and then Nina and Patricia taking their revenge out on him by throwing anything and everything they could get their hands on, while also Patricia finally telling Elmer that she loved him.

The lights came on and it was time for one more break. You sat quietly in your seat, holding on to Steve’s arm. You sighed which made him give you a kiss on the top of your head and rest his cheek there. He knew that this festival being over so soon was making you sad but he was determined to not make this the only time you two did one.

As the lights went off once more for the second to last film, a smile was quickly brought to your face as the famous intro song to any Laurel and Hardy flick started playing, along with seeing what movie it was; Way Out West, one of their most famous movies.

The audience sat quietly as they watched the owner of a saloon and his saloon-singer wife talk about how if they had enough money, they’d get out of town as fast as possible, then watched her sing and dance for all the people in the saloon.

The chuckles started as soon as Stan and Ollie’s theme played for the next scene as they were shown traveling down the road, Stan on foot leading a mule dragging a travois which Ollie was lying on. But laughter broke out when they came to a river and the travois detached from the mule leaving Ollie stranded in the river and Stan trying to help him out with comic complications as usual.

The audience watched as the boys hitched a ride into town and both flirted with the woman inside the stagecoach, only to then find out upon arrival that she was the sheriff’s wife and he threatened them to leave on the next coach or they’ll be leaving in a hearse.

The next scene really put a smile on your face as the song “At the Ball, That’s All” started being sung because the famous dance scene between Laurel and Hardy was about to happen. That scene never failed to put a smile on your face. It was one of your absolute favorite parts out of it.

After the audience whooped and cheered when the boys were done with the dance, it became quiet once more until they told the saloon owner that they needed to see Mary, a girl who worked there because her father died leaving her a goldmine and they were to deliver the deed to her in person, upon then gasps broke out from the kids when the saloon owner and his wife hatched a plan that they would take the deed from Mary and keep the gold for themselves.

Laughter broke out once again seeing that Stan had a hole in the bottom of his shoe and him sticking a piece of meat in it that another customer complained about being “tough as shoe leather” giving Stan the idea to use it for patching the hole, which in turn made Ollie give one of his famous exasperated camera stares.

Some gasps mixed with laugher followed as you all watched the saloon owner and his wife trick the boys into handing over the deed but not before comic complications ensued before handing it over, which included Ollie almost losing the deed and him and Stan taking almost every article of clothing off to find it.

After the boys handed over the deed to the fake Mary, another smile appeared on your face as you knew the next part was another one of your favorites and one that never failed to make you laugh; the boys singing “Trail of the Lonesome Pine” with lip-synched comedy effects from Laurel at one point and his delayed reaction to being knocked in the head with a hammer by Ollie. You loved it so much that you even had the song in one of your music playlists.

Gasps came again when the boys found out that the woman they just gave the deed to wasn’t the real Mary and that they were now determined to get the deed back from the swindlers and hand it over to the real Mary.

As the movie continued, bursts of laughter came and went between the boys trying to retrieve the deed with the first attempt ending up with Stan in massive giggle fits, more threats from the sheriff to get out of town, Ollie falling back into the sink hole in the river, Stan shockingly using his thumb as a lighter then having to eat Ollie’s hat from a bet he made earlier and more attempts to retrieve the deed from the safe at the saloon.

Cheers and applause happened during the end when the boys finally got the deed and escaped with it and the real Mary as well but quickly turned to laughs when once again they cross the river and Ollie fell into the sink hole.

The lights went on again and your heart sank a little deeper, for you knew that the last film of the night and the festival was going to be played right after the lights went down for the final time. It was a bittersweet feeling but you knew that Steve would want the two of you to enjoy something like this again. You sat patiently and waited for the final film.

And what a way to end it! When the lights went down and the last film lit up the screen, you were brought to happy tears seeing what movie they saved for last; Charlie Chaplin’s City Lights, considered one of the greatest films of all time. It was your #1 favorite Chaplin film, one you could never tire of seeing and certainly one that got you emotional every time over the story and how beautifully it played out.

Laughs started almost immediately upon seeing the Tramp sleeping on a new statue that was being revealed to the public. Trying to get off the statue, he gets part of it caught in his pants while then also getting scolded by a police officer and failing miserably for several minutes of getting off of it but finally managing to get away. Chuckles were heard here and there while the Tramp wandered the city and two newsboys taunt him for his shabby appearance, which he rebukes them for and almost has a near-fatal encounter with a sidewalk elevator while admiring a statue in a store window.

The theater got quiet for a bit while seeing the Tramp meet a blind flower girl on the street corner and in the course of buying a flower realizes she’s blind. Quite a few aww’s sounded as the Tramp was instantly smitten. You could’nt help but sigh and smile yourself as you watched the Tramp fall for the girl, let alone the beautiful music that accompanied such a beautiful scene.

It became quiet again with chuckles here and there as the audience watched the Tramp save a drunken millionaire from suicide, the drunk millionaire then save him, the Tramp stop the millionaire’ second suicide attempt then go out for a night on the town and cause trouble in a restaurant till early morning.

You all watched as a now sober Tramp drove the millionaire home the next morning when then he sees the flower girl en route to her street corner. The Tramp gets some money from the millionaire and catches up to the girl, buying all her flowers and drives her home in the millionaire's car but then upon returning to a sober millionaire who remembers nothing of what took place the night before, the Tramp gets thrown out of the house.

Laughter, sighs, aww’s and gasps came throughout the rest of the film as the audience watched the Tramp meet up with the drunk millionaire again, get kicked out the next morning, desperately try helping the blind girl get money for her operation, get fired from his job, try to win prize money for her in a boxing match, encountering the drunk millionaire for a third time and getting money from him for the girl’s operation.

Gasps came from kids all around the theater as they watched two burglars steal the millionaires money while the police believe that the Tramp was the one who committed the crime because after being knocked unconscious the millionaire doesn’t remember giving the Tramp the money. Some yells happened as you all watched the police try to apprehend the Tramp but then get away with enough time to visit the girl and give her the money but quickly turned to whimpers seeing that he told her he was going away for awhile, then was imprisoned.

You squeezed Steve’s arm tightly and had the biggest smile on your face knowing full well that the best scene was about to happen. He looked down at you, smiled and wrapped his arm around you knowing that this was your favorite scene.

A few sniffles had started here and there in the theater as you all watched the Tramp wander around the city once again after being in jail for months. At this point, you all learn that the flower girl now owns her own flower shop and has had her sight restored but when an elegant man enters the shop she wonders for a moment if her mysterious benefactor, whom she imagines to be rich and handsome, has returned.

By this time, there wasn’t a dry eye in the house. Sniffles and a few full-on cries were being heard throughout the theater as the audience watched the Tramp walk by the shop, where the girl was arranging flowers in the window. Dabbing your eyes with the tip of your finger, you all watched as he stooped to retrieve a flower discarded in the gutter after a brief run-in with the newsboys from earlier, as he turns to the shop's window through which he suddenly sees the girl, who has been watching him without of course knowing who he is. At the sight of her he is frozen for a few seconds, then breaks into a broad smile. The girl is flattered and giggles then motioning through the glass, she kindly offers him a fresh flower to replace the crushed one he took from the gutter as well as a coin.

Suddenly embarrassed, the Tramp starts to shuffle away, but the girl steps to the shop door and again offers the flower, which he shyly accepts. She takes his hand and presses the coin into it, but abruptly she stops as her smile turns to a look of puzzlement. She runs her fingers along his arm, his shoulder, his lapels, then catches her breath.

"You?" the tile card reads.

The Tramp nods with an uncertain smile and another title card pops up with him asking, "You can see now?"

The girl replies, "Yes, I can see now" and tearfully pulls his hand to her chest. The uncertainty on the Tramp's face turns to joy as the screen faded to black.

Cheers, whoops, yells and whistles filled the theater as it stayed dark with the lights coming on a few seconds later. You and Steve looked at each other, noticing both of you had tear stains running down your cheeks.

“Looks like I’m not the only one to get emotional over that scene,” you playfully said and nudged his arm.

Steve pretended to clear his throat. “I don’t know what you're talking about, [Y/N],” he said as he quickly tried to wipe his face.

“Don’t try that with me, Steven Grant Rogers. I can see through that tough exterior at times.” You gave him a wink and a smile.

He smiled back at you then got up and stretched. Offering his arm, you got up and stretched as well then took his arm and the two of you walked out of the theater. You looked back at the room for a moment and smiled, knowing this was what brought you and Steve together in the first place; a theater playing a black and white movie.

#avengers imagine #marvel imagine #steve rogers #steve rogers imagine #steve rogers x reader

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jarienn972 · 5 years ago

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A Simple Spell - Chapter Six

A Captain Swan Supernatural Summer Tale

I'm sorry that I’m a tiny bit late getting this latest chapter of my @cssns story finished. Between celebrating my youngest's birthday and working tons of extra hours in preparation for the uncertainty of Hurricane Dorian, I got a little behind with writing. I've got this all ready to go now and this chapter will find Emma coming off the high of her date with Killian while learning some news that just might leave her a little shaken.

As always, thanks again to all of those who make this event possible! Thank you to my beta reader, @lassluna for helping me patch some of the little holes and to @cocohook38 for the incredible artwork displayed in my header!

Read from the beginning on Tumblr: One Two Three Four Five AO3 FF.net

Emma probably could have floated home that night since her spirits were soaring so high. As she opened the door to the loft, her cheeks were aching from smiling so much during her drive and elation carried her right through the doorway. She unceremoniously tossed her coat and clutch onto the kitchen island as she caught sight of the couple sitting on the living room loveseat staring at her.

"I really need to get a place of my own," she muttered when she saw Mary Margaret's giddy grin and her brother's disapproving scowl.

"So - how was it?" Mary Margaret eagerly inquired, leaning forward in anticipation. "You're practically beaming so it must have been good…"

"I had a great evening," Emma replied, unsure how much detail she was willing to share with her brother and his wife.

"Who were you out with tonight?" David asked in full, overly-protective big brother mode. "Anyone I know?"

"No, it actually wasn't anyone you know," Emma assured him as she yanked off the elastic band that was holding her hair back, allowing her long locks to tumble free over her shoulders.

"How's that possible? I know just about everyone in this town…" David countered skeptically. His sister had gone out with a stranger?

"He's visiting from out of town," Emma stated, trying to keep David's skepticism from spoiling her mood.

"Out of town?" David glared. "You went out on a date with a complete stranger?"

"Oh, for goodness sake, David," Mary Margaret interjected, smacking him on the knee. "She's a grown woman - and a Sheriff's deputy. What exactly are you worried about?"

"I'd just rather know who my little sister is getting involved with," David responded, sounding more like a dad with every statement he made.

"I think I'm enough of a big girl to take care of myself," Emma spoke up defensively. "But if you must know, he wasn't a complete stranger. I'd met him a couple of days ago on a case."

"A case?" David struggled to recall what assignments he'd handed out to his sister this week and only one possibility came to mind. "You mean that drunken sailor down at the harbor?"

"Yes, that case, but not with the drunken sailor. My date was with the ship's captain and he was actually quite the gentleman. If I wasn't working tomorrow, I think I could have spent all night talking to him…"

"Talking?" he scoffed, not believing that at all.

"Yes, David - talking," Emma insisted, shaking her head in disgust. "And since you aren't going to believe me anyway, I'm going to head to bed and then tomorrow morning, I'm going to start planning another date with Captain Jones."

"Ooh, is that his name?" Mary Margaret jumped in, raising a hand to shush David from arguing any further.

"Yeah, Killian Jones, Captain of the Jolly Roger," Emma told her sister-in-law.

"Sounds like a pirate ship name…," David mumbled.

"Oh hush," Mary Margaret warned her husband. "Your sister had a great evening and doesn't need you souring it for her. You haven't even met this man so don't judge."

"Thank you, Mary Margaret," Emma smiled appreciatively at her defender. "But like I said, it is late and I'm heading up to bed. I wouldn't dare be late for work tomorrow, but I swear, if anything involves a farm again, I'm dragging Graham with me so he can do all the stomping through the mud this time."

**********

Still a little peeved with her brother by the time morning rolled around, Emma was glad to take the Sheriff's cruiser out on the day's first patrol. Alone in the car, she had some much needed time to think - well, maybe just a little too much time.

She still couldn't think about Killian Jones without a smile creeping across her face. The man was definitely the complete package - handsome, well-educated and obviously well-traveled. But for whatever reason, it was that well-traveled part that was giving her second thoughts. Could she really enter into and sustain a relationship with someone who was constantly sailing in and out of her life? Would she be able to trust him or would she end up being just his girl in this port? Her only long term relationship experience was with a man who couldn't go two weeks before he'd started cheating - although Killian certainly seemed much higher class than Neal ever would be.

On the other hand, there was Walsh. He wasn't nearly as exciting as the dashing Captain Jones, but he was familiar. He was based out of Boston, only a couple of hours away, so maybe he was the safer choice? While their relationship hadn't lasted before, it was probably because of the Neal-sized baggage she'd brought in to it. There was something to be said about slipping back into their cozy conversation, yet at the same time, she couldn't help but think about how easily she'd also been able to chat with Jones.

Ugh, maybe this wasn't the best time to be contemplating her love life, she thought as she made her third pass down Main Street. Trying to distract herself, she watched the usual stream of locals filing in and out of Granny's diner and noted lots of people she recognized strolling along the sidewalks. There were a handful of faces she didn't know, but they were likely residents who lived on the outskirts of town who didn't venture into town often.

It was only as she drove past Mr. Gold's pawn shop that something in her subconscious urged her to make a U-turn at the next intersection. She parked the cruiser at the curb outside of the little shop and stepped out. She'd only been inside the store once or twice since she'd arrived in Storybrooke but she had met the Golds a few times. Mr. Gold ran the pawn shop business (and probably a few other side businesses of questionable legality) and his wife, Belle, was the town librarian.

A small bell attached to the doorknob announced her arrival as she pushed the shop door open and passed through the entrance. The store's interior was every bit as eclectic - and every bit as creepy - as she'd remembered. Knickknacks and assorted trinkets were everywhere, inside glass cases, displayed on shelving or even hanging from the ceiling. Some of these were decidedly more macabre than others. Honestly, who keeps a human hand in a damned glass jar?

There wasn't anyone visible behind the counter or the ancient cash register that sat atop it as she made her way into the center of the shop, still not entirely sure of what had possessed her to come in.

"Good morning, Deputy Swan," a voice resounded from somewhere out of her view. The greeting was then followed by the rustling of wooden beads which hung in strips as a curtain dividing the shop from the private office beyond. A diminutive man with shoulder length grey hair wearing an impeccable dark wool suit appeared in the same doorway. "What can I do for you?"

"Uh, hello…," she stammered, mentally debating whether she should just turn around and return to the car, but she held her ground. "A mutual friend of ours sorta suggested that you might be a good source to ask about my mother…"

"Mutual friend?" He didn't even attempt to disguise his confusion.

"Walsh Gibbons," she replied, expecting more than his blank expression.

"Wouldn't exactly call him a friend," Gold stated. "We've done business together, but that's all."

"Oh," she said dejectedly. "He made it sound as though you knew each other well. I guess this was a wasted trip… Sorry to bother you."

"I have known Mr. Gibbons for a very long time, but we aren't more than acquaintances. We don't exchange holiday cards or do we invite each over to our homes. Strictly business, that's it…"

"I see…," Emma whispered under her breath as she turned towards the exit before she made a bigger fool of herself.

"Gibbons was correct in that I did know your mother though." Gold's words stopped her in her tracks and regained her curiosity. "You're Robert and Ava Nolan's daughter. I wasn't particularly close with your parents but we did know each other and I may be able to be of some assistance to you."

"I guess I was hoping that you might have some insight as to why she left Storybrooke," Emma explained as she approached the glass counter. My brother and most everyone else I know were all too young to remember and I haven't found much about her in the archives."

"There aren't many of us left from that era. Your mother was a bit of a free spirit, if I recall. She was often in opposition to others here about the town's direction. She had quite the independent spirit for a very long time, but then one day, the fire just went out of her."

"Was that around the time she left?"

"No - this was a few years earlier. She was merely a shell of her former self by the time she left Storybrooke."

Emma reminisced about the woman who'd raised her and not much was making sense. "But you don't know the reason she left?"

"Her reasons were her reasons, dearie," he stated with a shrug of his shoulders. "No one pushed her away and she would have been welcomed back with open arms had she chosen to return, but she never did."

"Considering she grew up here, sometimes it really seems like no one really knew my mother…"

"I do seem to recall that she brought a few items in to sell a few days before she left town," Gold dodged her unasked question by changing the subject. "I believe that some of those things might still be here as they weren't really items that would sell... But, at the time, she seemed so desperate…"

"That was more than twenty years ago," she reminded him, her voice heavy with skepticism as the shopkeeper made his way over to an antique oak cabinet and tugged open an ornately carved door. Inside, Emma spied a hodgepodge of objects - books, jewelry and was that an animal skull? "You really think you have stuff that belonged to my mother after all of these years?"

"Yes - here," he replied, lifting two dusty books that resembled those inside Regina's vault and a rectangular box that was just slightly larger than one of the books. "These were hers. Not much of a market for these little things…"

"What are those?" Emma queried, her interest suddenly piqued by the mere notion that these long, lost objects had belonged to her mother.

"For the right price, you can find out," he stated with a greedy, almost sinister grin widening across his face.

"The right price? Seriously?" she asked indignantly. This was a new low…

"I'm a simple businessman, Deputy. The objects were sold to me and if you would like to acquire them, you'll need to purchase them."

"How much?"

"Let's see…," he stalled, quite intentionally. "Perhaps we can strike a deal?"

"A deal? For what?"

"I'm aware that you are a member of Regina's current coven. We had a disagreement a while back and amidst our detente, she never returned a certain item that belongs to me."

"And I suppose you want me to get it for you?"

"If you would be so kind. Bring it to me and your mother's belongings are yours."

"Fine. What exactly am I asking Regina to return?"

"It's an old potion book that once belonged to a great alchemist. It is bound in royal blue leather and is entitled Potions of the Modern World."

"And that's it? I bring you the book and I get my mother's stuff?"

"Do we have a deal?" Gold asked eagerly.

"We have a deal. Any idea where Regina might be keeping your book?"

"Probably in her vault. She's warded the building against me so I can't go look for myself."

"Okay, I'll be there tonight so I'll look for it."

"Wonderful. 'Tis a pleasure doing business with you, Deputy."

"We'll see," she scoffed, hoping she could find his damned book quickly and without interference from the Mills sisters. "Just what sort of disagreement did you have that caused you to quit the coven?"

"Let's just say that we took a differing interpretation of things. Keep this in mind, dearie - not all in Storybrooke is what you might think."

"What the hell does that mean?"

Gold merely grinned and bid her adieu, leaving her contemplating his statement for the remainder of the day.

**********

By the time the sun set that evening, Emma's thoughts still weren't any clearer than they'd been that morning. She'd walked out of that pawn shop feeling slightly dumbfounded and utterly confused. Now, as she walked across the cemetery to the mausoleum, she was still trying to make sense of Gold's cryptic statement. What had the old man meant with his warning?

Twilight was making the graveyard shadows darken as the coven awaited the rise of the full moon at 8:27PM. Emma knew that Regina and Zelena were preparing some sort of elaborate ritual to mark the occasion but with so much on her mind, she wasn't thinking about rituals and spells - well, not the ones that the Mills had in mind at least. She found the sisters setting up a circle of lanterns in a grassy clearing behind the mausoleum and in the center of that circle was a carefully arranged pile of firewood that left Emma convinced there must be a cauldron around here somewhere. Cauldron or not, she was relieved to find the Mills sisters distracted so she would have some time to search for Mr. Gold's missing potion book. She'd rather not be caught poking around the vault hunting for it and have them start asking her questions about what she was looking for. Of course, there was always the possibility that she'd have to break down and ask Regina about it anyway, but she'd rather that option be a last resort. She had to be able to locate it on her own.

She managed to slip into the vault and down the staircase without drawing the attention of either Regina or Zelena and found only Ruby downstairs in the chamber, seated cross-legged on the floor with a bright, crimson cape draped across her lap. The waitress' face lit up the moment she spied Emma - who had absolutely no doubt about what Ruby was going to ask.

"Emma! I'm sooo happy to see you…" Ruby greeted her with a huge, expectant smile. Yeah, she was going to ask about Walsh…

"Hi, Ruby," Emma reciprocated the welcome, returning a far more half-hearted smile though. She really didn't have time to engage in a discussion about the man who'd met her for breakfast so she tried to dodge it with a little small talk as she perused the stacks and shelves of books. "You ready for this ritual tonight?"

"You mean that full moon ritual?" Ruby queried with a shake of her head. "Not me. I'm staying right down here until they're done. The full moon kinda does strange things to me…"

"It does?" Emma asked her friend quizzically. "Why did you come out tonight then?"

"You know exactly why - to ask you about your handsome friend who you were talking to at the diner yesterday…" she stated exuberantly. "You need to spill the details, sister…"

Yeah, this was exactly the conversation she didn't want to have right now. "Walsh is just an old friend from Boston and yes - before you even ask - we did date for a while. He's in town for a few days and we agreed to have dinner."

"Ah - rekindling the old flame?"

"That I don't know…," Emma admitted truthfully. "We met for dinner the other night and we might get together again tomorrow, but…"

"But what?" Ruby wondered. "He's not married, is he?"

"No, he's not married," Emma chuckled nervously, trying to focus on the rows of books before her, not this ridiculous conversation. She needed to find Gold's book and get the hell out of here, but she knew Ruby would never be pacified so easily.

"If he isn't married, what's the problem?" Ruby pressed. "He sure looks like a juicy catch…"

"It's sorta complicated…," Emma replied, immediately regretting her choice of wording.

"Complicated?" A broad, knowing smirk curled Ruby's lips and the words Emma was dreading blurted out of her friend's mouth. "Oh my god, Emma - there's another guy, isn't there?"

And there it was - the precise dilemma that Emma hadn't wanted to make public just yet. She could try to deny it, but Ruby would be all over her and if the truth came out elsewhere, it'd be more damaging than just telling her friend.

"Alright, alright… There might be…," Emma told her. "Can we not broadcast it just yet though?"

Ruby slid closer to the bookshelf. "Ooh, what does the other one look like?" she continued to grill Emma, but at least her voice was a whisper this time. "Tall, dark and handsome or fair and fine?"

Emma shook her head and lowered it in defeat. "Dark, windswept hair, incredible blue eyes and the deepest, sexiest, accented voice that would absolutely make you melt..."

"Girl, you are going to have to give me more than that!" Ruby exclaimed.

"Maybe later," Emma offered. "I just don't really want anyone knowing about my love life just yet…"

"Okay, I get it," Ruby replied with a wink. "We can have a little girl talk later?"

"If we don't get done with these full moon rituals too late tonight," Emma gave her a vague agreement, not wanting to divert too much of her attention from the hunt for Gold's damned potion book. Regina and Zelena would be finished setting up in the cleaning soon so it was time to redouble her efforts.

She tried to remain nonchalant about her search. Just browsing the shelves while waiting. That's all she was doing and that's all she wanted it to look like. Casual. Not suspicious at all - at least until she actually found the title she was hunting for. She spied the faded blue leather spine peeking out from amongst the other volumes on the very top shelf and the title, Potions for the Modern World, spelled out in worn, slivered block lettering. It was just tantalizingly out of her reach though. How was she supposed to get it down?

Her eyes darted fervently around the chamber looking for a step stool or a chair that wouldn't collapse beneath her weight if she were to stand atop it. She finally located a three-legged stool beneath the potion table that appeared sturdy enough but all of this was going to draw more of Ruby's attention. Not seeing any other way, Emma pushed the stool out from beneath the table using the toe of her boot. Once it was in reach, she swooped it up and brought it over to the towering bookshelves.

"Whatcha doing, Em?" Ruby asked curiously, just as Emma had expected.

"Just saw a book title that looked interesting…," Emma responded dismissively as she positioned the stool in front of the section she wanted. "And of course, it has to be all the way on the top…"

She hopped up onto the stool, hanging on to the thick wooden center beam of the built-in shelving unit with her right hand as she stretched her left hand towards the volume. She could just get her fingertips on it, working it to the edge of the shelf little by little in hopes of getting a better grip - just a tiny bit too close to that edge.

Emma cursed under her breath as the book tumbled to the floor, landing page-side down with a thud.

"I'll get that for you," Ruby offered as Emma stepped off of the stool. She scooped up the fallen book and inspected it for damage before passing it to Emma. "It looks in good shape," she continued as she handed the book off, but she noticed that there were some loose pages still littering the floor of the vault. Ruby stooped to gather up the remaining items, finding a couple of folded letters or notes and one very faded photograph. "I think these fell out though…"

"Those came out of the book?" Emma questioned.

"I'm pretty sure they did," Ruby replied. "There wasn't anything on the floor before the book landed here. These must have been shoved inside it somewhere."

"I guess we'd better put them back inside then," Emma said as Ruby placed the assorted items into her hand. She'd fully intended to put them all back into the book before returning it to Mr. Gold but Emma simply couldn't resist taking a peek at that lone photograph first.

It was an old color image of two young girls who were wearing clothing that seemingly dated the photograph to the late 1950s or early 1960s. On the left, a taller, dark haired girl was pictured standing with her arm wrapped around the younger, fairer haired girl on the right hand side. Their smiling faces were difficult to make out in the faded photo but Emma sensed something familiar about them.

"Cute kids," Ruby commented from over Emma's shoulder. Emma hadn't even noticed her standing there as she'd stared at the photograph. "Wonder who they are…"

"I've no idea, but I swear, they look familiar to me…"

"You know…," Ruby began, squinting at the image. "The little girl on the right sorta looks like you…"

And it was as though that flashbulb had gone off in Emma's head right then and there as she suddenly realized whose image had transfixed her - she was looking at a photograph of her own mother as a young child.

"Ruby - I think that's my mom," Emma stated in a stunned, disbelieving voice.

"Is there anything written on the photo?" Ruby wondered, hoping there might be something to answer more of their questions.

Emma flipped the photo over and found that there was a handwritten note in black ink. "It says Cora and Ava, 1964."

"Ava? Wasn't that your mother's name?" Ruby queried, the mystery growing deeper by the moment.

"Yeah, it was…," Emma answered, her eyes still fixed on the image from decades ago.

"And Cora?" Ruby continued. "I think that was Regina and Zelena's mom's name, wasn't it?"

"Uh, yeah… I believe so… I didn't know they were friends, but I guess it's a small town after all… Plus, it was probably even smaller back in the 1960s."

"Maybe there's something in those notes that explains more?" Ruby wondered, anxious to get more information.

"I don't think we should be reading those…," Emma said, not really sure it was right to invade the privacy of whomever had written or received those letters.

"Come on, Emma… Who's going to know?"

"Okay, but I'm blaming you if anyone asks," Emma caved as she set the book atop the stool and began unfolding the first of the delicate, handwritten letters. The brittle paper looked as though it had once been a baby blue hue, but portions had yellowed to take on a much more greenish tint. The blue ink had run in places and faded away entirely in others leaving the note barely legible, but Emma was striving to read as much as she could. "My dearest daughters, I'm so proud to see your progress! One day, I know that you will be the most powerful witches in all of the realms and we'll defeat the prophecy. Cora, you have done such an amazing job of tutoring your younger sister, and Ava, my darling, you've proven to be such a good little student…" Emma paused there, most of the remainder of the letter illegible, but mostly due to her eyes welling with tears. "That's all I can read," her voice cracked with emotion as the implication of what she'd just read sunk in. "But... my mother was Cora's little sister?"

#cssns #captain swan supernatural summer #cs ff #cs au ff #cs ff au #witch emma #a simple spell #please forgive any errors you might find here #i was rushing to edit in case dorian knocks out the power

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j-diamond · 6 years ago

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Compete (Jerome x Reader) P. 1

This is only part one. Part two will be out soon, if all goes well of course.

“C’mon Y/n.” Your friend says as they pull you towards an abandoned building, “I know you said you hate him, but I think he’s pretty cool.” You stop, baffled,

“What are you talking about idiot?” You ask, slightly irritated, they pause.

“Well. why you were off doing whatever,” you smirk knowing what they was referring to, “I found some people like me.” You shake your head,

“My interest is piqued.” You say holding out your hand, which they quickly begin to pull on.

“This way.” They tug you, and sure enough, there were countless people, all wearing similar outfits. You stifle a laugh,

“This is ridiculous.” you say, and they frown,

“Just wait.” they say, and you do, a whirring sound is heard, and an image begins projecting, him. You frown,

“You brought me here for this?” You ask, they look away sheepishly

“Well and this.” they say, as they smile and pull you up some stairs and through a doorway, “This is where he lies.” You look down, and sure enough, there laid his limp body, and you let out a chuckle.

“I’m leaving.” you say as you compose yourself, “You guys are ridiculous. He’s dead, and frankly, he was never great to begin with.” Your friend frowns,

“You’re just jealous.” they murmur and you face them,

“Jealous?” you ask, something snapping, “you think i’m JEALOUS of THAT ROTTING BODY who could only wish to be half AS GOOD as ME!” They back away a bit, slightly scared. You raise an eyebrow, and they look around avoiding eye contact,

“Well…” they start, still searching for something, as your breathing begins to slow again, “Dwight… said... that he could bring him back.” A smile creeps on your face,

“Bring him back you say?” your voice slightly sinister. They nod, agreeing and you stand up straighter, “Well let him know I look forward to his arrival.” You turn on your heel heading back to the exit.

You shoot up out of bed, shutting the alarm off. You check the time, prepping yourself. You shove your tools into the bag, sneaking through the hallway. You begin hurry as the liquid sloshes on the floor, making sure to stay just ahead of it. Once empty you skillfully hide it in the corner. You breathe in slowly as your hand reaches for the doorknob. A small inkling reminds you about your mask and you rush to grab it.

‘You’re just jealous.’

You grip the mask tightly, you’d prove them wrong. You throw it on the floor, letting it soak, as you walk out of the building. You smirk, laughing inwardly.

‘This’ll show ‘em.’ you think to yourself, lighting a match and tossing it. Your laughter grows louder as you retreat, the warmth of the raging fire decreasing against your back.

“Excuse me?” You call to the nearest person as you turn the corner. You hurriedly approach them, “That apartment building is on fire!” You look at them, eyes watering, pretending to be anxious, “All my stuff is in there!” You cry, deepening the effect. They shove in their pockets, grabbing a phone to call the police.

“I think I see them.” You say pointing in a random direction, “thank-you!” You run off, smirking to yourself. It was time to start anew.

“I don’t know who I think is worse.” He says as he places down his hand. His partner frowns,

“What do you mean?” he asks as he also l places his hand, slightly snickering, “I win.”

“Jamen.” He says looking at him, “I think you’re cheating.” They both glance at the cameras quickly,

“Well you always do Kayje.” Jamen responds, dealing out the cards again. Kayje rolls his eyes,

“Do you think she’ll go through with it?” Kayje ask as he picks up his cards, glancing at the cameras, “I mean Jerome never did.” Jamen looks up at him briefly,

“She’s just a copycat.” He states as he pulls a card from the deck, also glancing quickly at the cameras, “We don’t need to worry about her.” Kayje shakes his head,

“I don’t know.” he says as he grabs another card, “She seems worse?” This makes them laugh, “Maybe not.” A card slips from his hand and he rolls his eyes, “Don’t look at my hand.” He bends down slightly, then shoots back up, “I mean it Jamen!” Jamen turns around, laughing slightly,

“Promise I won’t.” he says, as Kayje picks up his card.

“I don’t know though,” he says, not entirely paying attention to the second sound of laughter, “She does seem a bit formidable.” he looks down at his gun, “I mean obviously not enough to beat us though.” He sits up adjusting his chair, “She is just a copycat after all, ri-” He pauses, seeing his dead partner, fear beginning to flood through his veins. The laughter becomes evident to him as it grows louder.

“Copycat?”A voice calls through the laughter, “That's interesting.” The laughter stops, and he spins around, trying to find the owner of the voice.

“Over here.” You say snickering. He turns to fins you sitting on his dead partner’s lap, “Wanna finish?” Kayje pulls out his gun aiming it at you,

“You are going to come with me...” He says, voice failing in between words. You pout, slightly displeased,

“But I had such a good hand.” you whine, waving Jamen’s cards, “I probably could’ve won.” He hurriedly turns off his safety and you frown,

“You wouldn’t really shoot me.” you ask sadly, “Would you?” he motions for you to stand up, “oops.” you keeps your eyes on the camera,

“Come on.” he says, confidence growing in his voice,

“But what about them?” you ask, eyes glued to the camera, “The calvary wouldn’t appreciate that.” “What?” he ask, eyes peering towards the camera, only to find hundreds of people with drama masks on.

“Shouldn’t have looked away.” you say, your voice going darker. On cue, the lights flash and when dark you attack. He whimpers as he lie crippled on the floor.

“Say something nice.” you say and he looks up, eyes wet with tears, which you laugh at. “You’re quite the funny person.” You pull out your gun, aiming it at him. He shakes his head, closing his eyes tight, bracing for death. You sigh. “No.” you sit your gun on table, “I can’t.” A smile creeps onto his face,

“You really mean it?” he asks and you nod. You looks at him sympathetically,

“I can’t.” you say a smile stretching onto your face, “It’d be so much more funny to shoot you with your own gun.” His eyes widen in fear as you grab his gun from the floor. You giggle as you cock it, “This is MUCH better.” you aim and shoot. His muscles relax and you shrug tossing it to floor as the people storm in. You clap as they come in,

“Here.” one says as he approaches you. You stand on the table,

“THE TIME IS NIGH!” you shout as they cheer, “LET’S SHOW THEM WHO WE ARE!” One approaches you and turns around, his back facing you. You hop on giggling, “ONWARD!” you give directions to the person carrying you as you and the group dash through the halls, killing anything that moved. When at long last you reached the vault, you blew it open. “GRAB ALL YOU CAN.” you order, “AFTER ALL...”

“IT BELONGS TO THE CITY.” they shout and you shrug. So they were then inner city gang. You stare off at the city through the vaults newly made opening. There were nothing worth conquering for you. You toss your bag out the hole in the wall, you were bored. You needed something challenging. You jump through, landing on the cushioning you placed there previously. You pull out your microphone,

“SO LONG FOLKS! IT WAS NICE WORKING WITH YOU GUYS!” you shout to them and they cheer, making you laugh, “BE CAREFUL OF THE POLICE!” you say as you toss a tear bomb through the opening. You snicker as shouting can be heard as you run off. A plan forming of the mischief you’d make tomorrow.

“So they had all been caught?” you ask looking up at Gordon through your thick framed glasses. He nods,

“Yes, in the middle of a bank heist.”he responds and you scribble it down,

“So another successful capturing by our saviour detective Jim Gordon.” you say smiling, then you begin muttering under your breath, “Thank you for your cooperation with Gotham’s Lead Newspaper, Power Grid. It’ll be in yesterday’s newspaper at eleven.” He nods, obviously off in thought, “Thanks again, Jimbo.” you leave out, returning through the back entrance. You toss off your disguise hoping Gordon had gotten the clue. You were gonna rat out Jerome’s cult, and have them run to you for protection. That’d be the best revenge. You sift through evidence, finding the map Dwight had carried on him. You circle the warehouse where they usually meet, and returned it to its previous position.

“How do you know Jim!?” The familiar shout of Officer Bullock rang through the connecting hallway. You dashed for the exit but the door opens and you hide in the cabinets,

“Who else calls me Jimbo?” Gordon replies as he tears things of the shelf, “Plus she said the power grid. There is no newspaper called the power grid.” Harvey groans,

“And what if it’s a trap?” he asks,

“It’s a risk i’m willing to take.” Gordon replies having found the map, just as you predicted. His eyes begin searching until they ran across the thin circle, “They must be gathering here.” Bullock scoffs,

“Lucky guess.” He says, and there steps begin to retreat, but stop suddenly. You pause,

“She’s still here.” Gordon whispers, and you can hear their soft steps. You frown, how did they know? Then your mind shifts back to when you had tossed the disguise on the floor and you mentally curse yourself. So like a magician you pull your last rabbit out of your bag,

“Hi Jimbo.” you say, throwing your voice across the room. You could hear them turn on their heels, to where you’d thrown your voice, “Looking for me?” They whip around again, unsure where your voice was coming from,

“Come out, and we just might let you live.” Bullock says sternly and you begin laughing, throwing it around, engulfing them as you crept towards the exit. You can hear a gun cock behind you and you turn to see Gordon, and you smile, your maniacal laughter still bouncing off the walls. You stop staring at him,

“It’s too late.” you say, staring deeply in his eyes. He raises his eyebrow at you, his gun aimed at you, but you return it with a closed eye smile, “Chaos always win.” With that you slip away, leaving him yet another clue.

“Hello!” you greet, the guards stare at you as you approach the news station, “I’m here for my interview they say it would be here at…” You pull out a notepad, feigning ignorance, “11.” They flip through their sheet of what you assume were guest. They nod in confirmation and let you through,

“Wait here, and Make-up will get to you soon.” One says as they leave again. You smirk,

“What idiots…” You say, laughing at their ignorance, as you proceed to change into your signature outfit. As you throw your old clothes under the desk you hear the door open and you turn to them a smile on your face,

“Let’s play a game.” you say pulling out a gun, “It’s called: You scream, You die.” You motion to the chair, to which she sits in,

“What are you--” she starts but you shush her,

“Chaos wouldn’t be chaos without a little improv.” you whisper as you pull out your bottle of chloroform. You laugh at her tearful eyes, “No one’s going to come save you. I promise.” You hold up your pinky but she’s already out like a light. You duct tape her mouth for when she wakes, and then tie a grenade to her hand, a string to the pin and to the the closed door, “let’s hope no one tries to open this door right?” you pout seeing no response. You climb through the vent to the other room. You go up to the door and pull it softly just to make sure there was resistance, which there was. You hear distant screaming, alerting you that it had started.

“People of gotham…” a voice broadcasts, and you roll your eyes. You weren’t a copycat, whoever that idiot is, was the real copycat.

“How unoriginal.” You state, as the broadcast ends. All eyes shoot over to the corner, where you were hidden. You see guns pointed in your direction, and you smirk, chuckling lowly. “You really think you did well don’t you?” The man you recognize talking earlier lifts up the literal face mask he was wearing revealing who you knew to be Dwight, “Desperate much?” You giggle at the attempt,

“We have the upper hand.” He starts, “Surrender or die.” you could tell he was hesitant, you smiled,

“No need.” you say as you slowly step out of the shadowed corner, “I’m simply here to help.” He eyes you skeptically, “You’ll need it.”

“Why?” he asks, and you smirk,

“Gordon.” you say simply, already bored with the conversation, “He doesn’t think much of you.”

“He fears us!” he shouts and everyone shouts in agreement, you laugh dryly,

“No spunk,” you say as you walk to him, “No spazazz,” You shoot his lakey as everyone aims to shoot, “No reason to save you then.” You turn smiling.

“What do you mean?” he asks, only loud enough for you to hear. You chuckled, he had no guts, if jerome had been here, he’d never last.

“Watch and learn.” You say as you dash in front of the camera, “HELLOOOOOO LOVELY, LOVELY CITIZENS OF GOTHAM!” You smile at the camera, and you could hear the police cars pulling up, “Let’s play a game.” You back up clapping your hands, “It’s called I spy. You all know it.” You reach in your pocket, “Except there’s only one thing you need to find,” you pull out your grenade, “The bombs!” you laugh tossing out the window, hearing an explosion. You make an ‘oops’ face, “I guess that means there’s only five left now.” You laugh loudly, “GOOD LUCK GOTHAM.” You look directly into the camera, your voice lowering, “you’ll need it.” You walk off set, smiling at the cult, “Also, Gordon should be here soon. Byeeeee~” You leave, walking into the large window area where they were holding a dude hostage with duct tape and a grenade, you roll your eyes. “Copycats.” you see gordon and smile, walking up to the window, waving. Noticing you, he frowns, converses with Bullock and just stares at you. You smirk, and motion for him to come closer, which he does. You grab a sharpie from the desk and begin drawing backwards so they can see it properly. You finish looking at it, and all the police officers are looking at it confused, to which you sigh. You point at the one and then point at the grenade, smiling immensely. You then write ‘four left’, taking one of the strings connected to the grenade and dashing out of the room. After reaching the end of the string you look around, you were far enough. You yank it and jump as you hear the explosion, you were still closer than you thought. You begin dashing, once you hear the footsteps approaching. A few minutes later you hear an explosion and you smile, someone had opened the door and now there were three left.

You smash a bat into the tv, he was back. He just had to steal your thunder. You sit almost defeated, you hear beeping, alerting you someone had been intruding. So you wait, pulling out your trigger for the other three bombs, hiding it in your top. The door is broken down and you can hear a gun click, alerting you he was here.

“So this is the famous Y/n!” You could hear the laughter in his voice and you force yourself to not smile. “I thought it was just a coincidence” He steps closer, “But it isn’t is it n/n?” You can’t help but laugh,

“n/n?” You ask, in between laughs, “She died a long time ago.” You looked up at him, you eyes traveling the staple line, “Along with whatever this is.” You smirk, seeing he was speechless. Your exit was cut short, with the sound of laughter and a goon blocking your path. You turn to look at him,

“Y/n…” he says, a smile still on his face, “Can’t we just be friends?” He places an arm around your shoulder, “Just like last time?” You chuckle,

“You haven’t changed a bit.” you mutter, chuckling. You look at him, placing your hands on his face, your fingers grazing his staples, “You’d really like that?” He nods and you stare into his eyes, you faces inching slowly closer. You could feel the almost purring like sound he’d make whenever he was happy. You smirk as your lips lightly grazed his, “No.” you whisper as you walk out of the apartment room, away from him.

#gotham #gotham x reader #jerome valeska #jerome x reader #jerome valeska x reader #jerome valeska oneshot #jerome valeska fanfiction

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flowercuco · 6 years ago

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Fiasco! - Transatlantic.

This weekend me and some friends played Fiasco, specifcally the Transatlantic playset by E. Tage Larsen.

The premise is that we’re on the Leviathan a boat that’s speeding across the sea to secretly win the Blue Riband, the award for crossing the Atlantic the fastest. Nothing could possibly go wrong as a result of the captains desire to win the award and there’s no way that anyone on the boat opposes him. (Note: this is a joke)

Our star studded cast are myself and @jacquerel cheating, allowing six players in this game, via playing a pair of identical non-binary fancy lad children, Barry and Berry Knight, mischievous fourteen year olds with a variety of skills they shouldn’t have.

We have @mimicdog as Belén Santiago Durand, a sweet cook, soft spoken and low key he/him lesbian who definitely isn’t stressed and definitely isn’t afraid of the water.

Seedy presented us with Clothilde Devereaux, a former battlefield nurse from the Great War with ulterior motives and plenty of tea.

@augmentalize gave us Vasily Dmitriovich (he/they), who swam to western Europe from Russia and is probably some kind of fish man.

And finally, rounding our our cast is @foursight‘s William "Billie" Blackwell, a trans man aristocrat who just wants to settle in a new life in America, and hopefully get laid at some point before then.

The web of relationships we weave have the twins being mischievous friends with Belen, and paint Billie as an eccentric uncle, as well as establishing Belen’s fear of water and an interesting trunk, delivered to the wrong address.

Clothilde and Belen share a mutual suspicion of their respective false faces, while the nurse and Vasily are cultists trying to stop the Deep God from rising, with a sacrifice of course.

Finally, Billie is of course, a Confirmed Bachelor and Vasily is his bachelor companion. Wink.

We start off with a scene in which the twins are in their cabin, inspecting a mysterious suitcase that is similar to theirs, but not theirs, while we do not see the contents of the case, it is enough to make Billie want to take charge of it, despite initially trying to push it on as something they can do to build character. As Billie leaves the scene with the case, the twins look to each other and reveal a wicked, seashell knife, a prize looted from the box prior to their calling of their guardian.

Belen’s first scene is one in which he meets Clothilde and Vasily, having a moment in which we establish Vasily’s wet feet and need of... hydration, as the two discuss their plans to delay the ship, catching the ear of Belen at a less than critical moment. The cook comes over and while the two manage to ease his suspicions, the nervous cook takes to them, believing them to be... friends.

Clothilde’s scene involves her, Billie, and the captain of the boat playing bridge, a card game almost none of us are familiar with, passing cards around or whatever and establishing the captain’s odd dreams. He has never dreamed dreams like these before, shocking Belen, the fourth player of the game, as he has never dreamed anything real, but this feels more than his dreams have been. Clothilde tries to ease his worries, implying that she might help later...

Vasily is in the lower decks, in somewhat of a disguise, when he stumbles upon the twins, toying with something shiny, hearing them comment on how it looks like the ocean on there. When he makes his presence known to them, they deflect, saying that its a pocket watch, which very much does not reflect the ocean. Vasily tells the twins of a tale involving a child who fell into a train furnace, which excites them, asking Vasily what that would be like. Vasily offers to tell them if they go find the furnace, but they do not manage to find it, as the twins get lost.

Billie’s first scene involves him inviting Vasily to a party the next night, which the captain insists on throwing. Vasily comments on the scandalous nature of it, but ultimately accepts the invitation. Additionally, Billie comments on the chest the twins found, and Vasily claims it belongs to a friend, after observing it, he realizes that something is missing. Billie promises to get the twins to give it back to him.

The twins go bother Belen the next day, wanting to trade the knife for a cool skull ornament thing that he... acquired... Belen asks about the knife and the twins comment on its similarity to the ocean. Belen begins to get a little scary, and asks for the knife. The twins give him the knife, hoping that the chef thinks about giving them their desirable skull in return. Belen uses the knife and gets cut by it, accidentally, leading the cook to go to Clothilde for help, saying that he has been... cut. Clothilde is obviously suspicious, but tries to calm Belen down, saying that its fine, and not to worry. Later, the nurse speaks with Vasily about what’s going on with Belen, and that they need to recover the knife and possibly prevent the party. Clothilde lends Vasily her parrot to aid him in recovering the knife.

Vasily once again finds the twins, bird in tow, threatening them lightly in that adult way, and asking them where the knife is. Though the twins consider Belen their friend, they are more concerned with the bird and offer to assist in retrieving the knife. The final scene of act one involves Billie and Clothilde speaking about the party and the captain, with Billie asking her to help the captain, as the ships doctor seems to not have done that great of a job. After becoming a bit suspicious, Billie goes to the captains quarters and sees something which causes him to faint. When he wakes up, Clothilde is pouring him some brandy.

The tilt, chosen by seb and seedy, consists of Tragedy, someone’s life is changed forever, in a bad way, and Failure, a tiny mistake leads to ruin.

Act two begins with Barry and Berry once again near the engine room of the ship, finding a wrench in a pivotal place and pulling it out, undoing one of the cultist’s sabotage. Vasily calls upon them now to distract Belen, and they succeed, distracting the cook while Vasily sneaks around, eventually getting the knife from under his nose. Belen notices the knife being missing, and finds the twins in their room, asking for where the knife is. The twins think about whether or not to sell Vasily out before just agreeing to. Belen insists on having them help him get the knife back despite them asking and begging him to take a nap or something, only for Vasily to come on in and knock Belen out, and then lock the twins in their room, for their own safety at this point.

Billie wakes up and Clothilde tells him he had a fall, and to not worry and have some brandy. Billie takes some but then starts to remember, saying that theres problems, that they need to do something. Clothilde tries and fails to convince Billie to step down, eventually feeling the need to act, getting out a syringe and stabbing Billie, who faints. Vasily brings Belen in a potato sack to Clothilde, hopefully solving their sacrifice problem as she reveals an unconscious BIllie. The two converse and decide to trade captives, having a bit of a spat but deciding that stopping the deep one is more important. When he comes to, Billie questions Vasily about the cult and the other things going on in the ship, Vasily admits to it, saying that he was going to tell him when they got to shore, shocking Billie, as it meant someone would have been sacrificed and he would have been none the wiser. He needs some space and he leaves Vasily for now, needing to think on the events of the night.

The Knight twins escape their room and find themselves in the captains quarters, concerned and dismayed at the unseen horrors inside, getting the sense that it is as if it is getting filled with water, and the two deciding they need to get Belen, their friend, and an adult. Belen is taken to the captains quarters, now increasingly more... fish like, and obsessed. Belen goes to the captains quarters and the resulting event makes the twins run away. Clothilde takes to drastic measures to sabotage the ship, breaking into the boiler room and rigging it to explode. Vasily chases Belen into the captain quarters, and the two fight over the knife, Belen desperately needing it while Vasily tries to finish the ritual to stop the deep one from rising. In the conflict, Belen is stabbed, bleeding a far more viscous ichor and unknowingly ending the ritual. Billie finds the twins as people are evacuating the boat, he tells them to go to the liferaft despite the two of them asking where he is going. Billie leaves them after ensuring their safety and takes out his gun from its locked box. Billie goes out and finds Vasily still struggling with Belen, sharing a tense conversation before Billie puts the gun down and lets Vasily go, swimming down with the ship as Billie turns away, leaving with the other evacuating people.

In the epilogue, here is the state of the game.

William "Billie" Blackwell, ends with White 10, not too shabby, having a comfortable life for a time, but constantly drawn to the events that occurred on the ship. He does more and more research before eventually turning into a supernatural investigator.

Vasily Dmitriovich ends with a White 6, a weak ending, going in and out of cults over the years, trying to do what he can before eventually being found by some sort of suit clad cult group and shoved into a car for unknown purposes...

Clothilde Devereaux ends with a Black 14, awesome, an ending that is better than anyone else’s. She changes her name, gets a new life, starts to work in a hospital and eventually has an entire hospital as well as another wing named after her. She is last scene retiring with a beautiful wife driving a convertible.

Belén Santiago Durand ends with a Zero, a fate worse than death, and finds himself on an island with various fish people and normal people, having fully been converted into some sort of jellyfish person and trying to adjust. After some time, having, some friendship? or something to the effect, he changes back, leaving the cultists and fish people and staring down at himself, saying that he can never go back. He can never go back. He doesn’t know if he can go back.

Barry and Berry Knight end with White 7, a second weak ending, they land with the others, finding it a bit more difficult to speak with each other and with Billie, watching the boat sink along with their stuff. As their life goes on, they are reprimanded for their behaviour and eventually forced into a boarding school for troubled children, where one night, after curfew, they find a dead body, the start of another mysterious event.

Fiasco’s great!

#fiasco #very fun

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chillm4tic · 6 years ago

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A very SKAMson birthday!

@rogueleader1987 KT Baby, HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!

I’m gonna restrain myself from writing you a whole long love letter on the internet, because you already know all the things. When we were getting to know each other, I kept being surprised by all the things we had in common, but when we discovered we’re both Fansons, GAMECHANGER! I never thought I could share all these things that hardly anyone else cares about with one person. But here we are.

As a birthday gift, please enjoy SKAMson, or, the Hanson soundtrack to SKAM Season 3 (<-- it’s a link to the playlist on Spotify!). I know we’re always crying at each other about all the Hanson songs that make us think of Evak, so… for your birthday, here’s the one thing that I can give you that no one else can… a frivolous mashup of our very first fangirl obsession and the thing that ruined us and brought us together 20 years later (SKAM) that no one asked for … our OG pretty blonde boys meet Evak! I’m sorry I don’t have the skills to make this cute with pics and gifs and shit.

(under the break)

E1: We open on a pretty sweet party. Running Man is just a great party track, and it’s about making mistakes which he’s done and will do plenty of, plus Isak literally runs away at the end of the party. This episode also needs Where’s the Love? and Weird because this confused baby needs the right kind of love:

Sitting on the side waiting for a sign, hoping that my luck will change Reaching for a hand that can understand, someone who feels the same When you live in a cookie cutter world being different is a sin So you don't stand out, but you don't fit in. Weird.

E2: For that epic stare, I have to include Optimistic. I mean, it’s Hanson covering Radiohead! It only makes sense!

The rest of this episode is If Only. This song always makes me think of it, particularly when he’s watching the Even and Mikael video, and when they’re flirting in Even’s apartment. SWOON!

If only I had the guts to feel this way And if only You'd look at me and want to stay And if only I'd take you in my arms and say I won't go, 'cause I need you Cause I need you

E3: Sure About It sums up a lot of this episode. Isak is stress and confused. Then Crazy Beautiful and Thinking ‘Bout Somethin’ (I’ve been thinkin’ ‘bout something’ other than you) are perfect for the last clip. I especially appreciate all the innuendo in Crazy Beautiful:

Liquid, melancholy dreams Tell me what it means 'Cause you drive me crazy Driftwood, won't you float me down your stream? Tell me what it means 'Cause you drive me crazy

'Cause you're crazy beautiful

Don't go looking in my eyes tonight Don't go telling me lies tonight Don't go promising the skies tonight When you're crazy 'Cause you're crazy beautiful

E4: Runaway Run because “people leave their wife and kids to be together with the one they love” and these two dorks run away from their dates together in this episode.

21:21 is Lost Without You.

I see it all aligned in front of my face But like a shooting star fades It could be gone just as fast as it came I'm gonna take this moment and chase this fear right out of me Come one day I will have no regrets after today 'Cause the “unexpected beautiful” I'm about to admit I've been longing for

Is staying in my arms tonight There's nothing that I wouldn't do I just wanna be the one you're holding onto And if you wanna run tonight I'll follow anywhere you want me to I'm giving you my heart 'cause I I'm lost without you Lost without you

E5: Phew, there’s a lot happening in this one. I think Already Home makes sense since it opens on the morning after their first night together, and they already feel so comfortable and warm, like they’re already at home together. I cry.

And then the locker room scene always makes me think of Madeline.

Your lonely face Your lonely eyes This is something you can't disguise It's not just me, you feel it, too ‘Cause you know I belong to you

Look at where we're goin' Tell me what can I say We're tracing our footsteps We're going the same way

Madeline Here we go around again You know it, I know it Don't try to pretend

Re: Eskild’s epic truths, This Time Around.

I heard them say that dreams should stay in your head Well, I feel ashamed of the things that I've said Put on these chains and you can live a free life Well, I'd rather bleed just to know why I die

And finally, Hand in Hand to bring the angst at the heartbreaking end.

I know just how much I love you But there is no time to explain I realize just what I'd give to Get you back in my arms

And I see you hand in hand with another man And I don't know what you see in him and why you let us go

So if you're gonna lie At least you could just let us die And if you're gonna cry to me baby At least you could just say goodbye

E6: I definitely think of Tragic Symphony for the opening of this episode. It’s one of their few angry songs, and… it works.

I’m just a part in your masterpiece A minuet in a minor key A sad song that you know so well You cheat me, but you have no tell And you keep leading me on You make a good thing feel wrong

Poor Isak bby can’t sleep. He Can’t Stop thinking about Even.

Morning, day or night I tremble at your sight It's impossible to fight; I've tried

Now you're in my head And your mind I've read Could recite the words you've said Now I

Can't stop thinking about you Can't get you off my mind No, I can't stop thinking about you all the time Can't stop thinking about you I can't get you off my mind No I can't stop thinking about you I'm thinking about you all the time

Lost Without Each Other makes me think of when they meet in the cantina.

All I know is what I'm missing What I'm missing is your kissing Are you listening? Don't go, don't go telling me you're all right There's no room for getting uptight Don't go saying that you're okay When you're lonely Baby, don't go telling me we're over When you know you're my one and only lover And I won't go saying that we're okay when we're Lost without each other 'Cause we're lost without each other

Annnnnd finally, this episode and Evak in general also makes me think of Save Me. The opening line of this song ruins me every time.

Loving you like I never have before I'm needing you to open up the door If begging you might somehow turn the tides Then tell me to I've got to get this off my mind

I never thought I'd be speaking these words I never thought I'd need to say Another day alone is more than I can take

Won't you save me, 'cause saving is what I need I just want to be by your side Won't you save me, I don't want to be Just drifting through the sea of life

E7: Tonight (for obvious reasons) and Get the Girl Back.

It’s about time that you put your cards back on the table It’s about time that you show her you’re willing and able It’s about time that you get the girl back That you get the girl back on your side

E8: Obviously an embarrassing pop song is in order for the Breakfast Kitchen Dance Party, so it’s got to be Mmmbop, of course! Even would fully dig this song. (And Mmmbop is all about the future being impossible to predict and control, and appreciating and living in the moment… very Sesong 3!).

Great Divide for when Sana schools Isak about hate and fear re: religion, and just Sana in general.

When every eye is one the fortune It can only breed contempt They say blood is thicker than oceans Still we box our brothers in

I find hope and it gives me rest I find hope in a beating chest I find hope in what eyes don't see I find hope in your hate for me Have no fear when the waters rise We can conquer this great divide

Waiting for This makes me think of High for This.

And then Juliet (yes!) is perfect because... well, because Juliet!

Juliet, every single time you get me all messed up I try to talk it out But you’re so hot to touch And Juliet, I feel so dangerous Looking in your eyes is perilous But I don’t care ‘cause I would die for love

Through your window breaks the rising sun By any other name, you’re still so beautiful In everything I do, I will love you my whole life If you’ll be my, be my

Juliet, you are a drug and it is quick And with a kiss I lose my senses Juliet, you are a fire, I am consumed Tonight I’m dying in your arms

And for the end, Strong Enough to Break … the fabric is about to fray.

E9: Love Song for the heartbroken boy.

In this lifelong love song You can love right, you can love wrong In this love song, you can love wrong But if you love wrong, it doesn't mean love's gone Oh, and it doesn't mean love's gone Just because you're feeling low And it doesn't mean love's gone 'Cause you feel like you want to let go See, no one wrote in this book of love That you'd always know I wish someone would have told me before

Wish I Was There for the pining boy.

The sun has fallen Another day gone without you. My heart keeps callin' And I don't know just what to do When you're near me I seem to forget my lonely days It's more than a feelin' It's something that can't be explained

I wish that I was there I wish that I was there When you're not here I wish that I was there

O Helga Natt is definitely I Will Come to You. It’s so perfect, it hurts.

When you have no light to guide you And no one to walk to walk beside you I will come to you Oh I will come to you When the night is dark and stormy You won't have to reach out for me I will come to you Oh I will come to you

Sometimes when all your dreams may have seen better days And you don't know how or why, but you've lost your way Have no fear when your tears are fallin' I will hear your spirit callin' And I swear that I'll be there come what may

And a little bonus live O Holy Night / Silent Night / O Come All Ye Faithful medley, for funsies.

E10: A Minute Without You for minutt for minutt. And Underneath for sweet Even.

I know what to say But don't know where to begin I fear I'm losing you beneath my skin Is there resolution for this pain that I'm in?

Sitting all alone in this place Even though we're here face to face There is nothing gone But there's something wrong

Can't you see That I'm stuck here underneath And you’re making it hard to breathe? Take a look around and tell me what you see You'll find me underneath 'Cause you'll find me underneath

Watch Over Me (naturally) and Smile for passa på meg, because Isak likes seeing Even laugh/smile, and it’s just the sweetest song for the sweetest boys.

Well this feeling I've been feeling Well I can feel it right now from my head to the floor When I see you I want to love you Till the end of time and a little bit more

And I'm not gonna let it go You've got to let your feelings show So smile, give me all your heart and we'll never be apart. I'll never leave you alone If you'll just smile, tell me that you care And I'll always be there. I'll never leave you hurting if you just smile.

I also think a lot about Carry You There in relation to Isak being there for Even.

Try You don't have to be afraid to just rely On someone to hold the weight part of the time It's alright It can get too much to handle by yourself If you can't do it alone I know you will say I don't know what's at stake or what it takes

'Cause I don't care what you say Don't have use for your words anyway You don't need a Cadillac 'Cause I'll be waiting with my bare back To carry you there

Finally, Nå = Dying to be Alive

The things you see The way you see them Will never been seen again Let’s go through life Livin' on luck and betting ten thousand to ten Mistakes I've made in this life I can’t say why or when But the thing that's strange is You only live once And never look back again

I'm dying to be alive Not trying to just survive Let’s not go through our lives Without just dying to be alive

And we all come tumbling down No matter how strong, we all turn to the ground In the days to come you’ll say "why did I wait?" You can't just leave your life up to fate Gotta turn it around before it's too late

BONUS! Even’s clip from s4 always makes me think of Every Word I Say.

Before you I was only What I let control me You are a revolution Against my own conclusions Till today I feel I can't lose I'm letting go of what I knew

I want you for always I hear your name in every word I say I'm a fool and I don't care I hear your name in every word I say

And now I say goodbye to the way I used to be There is no room for question Cause your name it sets me free Yesterday's troubles harm me Today's are creeping in So let go of the world around me Cause your love is all I need

I want you for always I hear your name in every word I say I'm a fool and that's okay I hear your name in every word I say

I want you for always I hear your name in every word I say I'm a fool and I don't care I hear your name in every word I say

That’s it! I hope you liked this absurd thing that I spent my actual time on! Love you so much, KT Baby. Thank you for being born/you/mine. <3

#SKAM #skamson #Hanson #evak #HAPPY BIRTHDAY KT!!!!!#rogueleader1987 #a ridiculous thing

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