#update: edited!

[applestorms]

i'm in a bit of a john mood atm, so i wanted to write a post about some of the things that i think fanon gets wrong about him. the biggest thing is that imo a lot of people flatten john a ton in considering him the poster child for Homestuck™ as a story, which sucks because i think it should go the opposite way around. he's the prototype kid, yes, but that just means his unique traits have interesting implications for the rest of the story and homestuck's core themes, not that he doesnt have any unique traits to begin with. john informs homestuck of its themes, the story doesn't inform him of his character traits; sburb gives him the kernelsprite, but he & his friends are the ones doing the prototyping.

so, then, what are those character traits? who is john as a person and how does that inform the story as a whole?

TL;DR: if jade's overarching story arc is about the struggle of loneliness & isolation, john's is about the feeling of falling behind your peers, which is why i think his ending the story depressed works so well

trapped in the s(u)burbs

okay, argument: SBURB is clearly pronounced "sss-burb," like suburb but skipping over the first u. when the kids enter the session they are basically trapped in the world of the game until they can beat it and make the new universe -> they are trapped in the s(u)burbs -> they are home, stuck.

this is a weird line of thought but it's kinda interesting to go through the ways that the (human) kids are trapped in their homes, both physically and emotionally. rose is stuck in that she lives seemingly in the middle of fuckin' nowhere surrounded by a forest, dave is stuck in his apartment due to being watched by an abusive parent, and jade, jake, roxy, & dirk are all stuck in the middle of the ocean. john (and jane) however? they're just in the suburbs.

idk how much this cultural context translates to people living in other countries, but john & jane's original neighborhood is the fucking Epitome of modern american suburbia. i cannot emphasize enough just how much i fucking despise neighborhoods like this: sprawling and empty, they are a modern labyrinth to navigate. every single house looks like it was copy and pasted one spot over, the streets are all named the same thing but with slight differences ("Bluejay Road" vs. "Bluejay Lane" vs "Bluebird Court" HELL), driving through them is agony and walking is impossible. my dad pointed out to me one time that every single house looks like it was painted with a different shade of baby shit and he was correct. and this is not even mentioning the people that live there: i don't want to overgeneralize too much, but these houses are usually pretty big and the fact that they're supposed to be a "safer" place to raise kids makes them decently expensive, so these places are generally very white, very upper-middle class, and you can just. Feel It in the air

so this is where john starts his story. the page (A1:82) was one of the first things that caught my eye when reading homestuck originally, even as a dumb little preteen the age of the characters themselves with barely any greater social consciousness. john starts the story fucking around in his room, talking to all of his friends online, and who could ever blame him when it's such an american wasteland outside. not to get too far into my opinions on american architecture, but if you live anywhere in the united states and ESPECIALLY the suburbs you are basically trapped in the house until you can get your license at 16, transportation entirely at the whims of where your parents can/want to drive you. it makes sense, then, that john's aspect is breath and so heavily tied to transportation, a desire to get out and moving and interacting with the world. the sick irony of sburb, imo, is how that desire is later twisted against him.

when john first enters the session, meteors are beginning to destroy the world and the rest of the entire human population of earth. but to a kid for whom the entire world feels so far away and empty, how much does that really matter? especially when your internet friends, the few people you actually care about, are just going to enter the same game and escape along with you. speaking of,

2. social anxiety & internet friends

one thing i really like about the alpha kids is the fact that you can kinda reverse engineer them and their core character traits from the beta kids, which actually still works within the logic of canon if you consider their biological relationships. not only do the alphas and betas share chumhandle initials, but the person they share with is also the person they are most similar to across generational lines:

rose & dirk are both anal retentive motherfuckers + rose's interest in psychology informs dirk's interest in philosophy/old greek dudes, roxy & dave care about their friends to a fault and serve their needs constantly (emotionally vs. practically, maybe; and also maybe are in love with all their friends to some degree or another too?), jane & jade both have ties with their respective universe-iteration's first guardian and are mentally separated from everyone else at the start of their arcs (jane by not believing roxy and jade by getting prospit visions).

imo rose & dirk have the strongest connection and jade & jane the weakest, and each kid is also pretty unique on their own + informed by their more direct familial relationship too, but i think the chumhandle connection is key in understanding how the characters were initially created in terms of basic personalities, likes, dislikes, etc. since it fits with the stacking nature of how homestuck as a whole functions, both as a story and a world.

so: john & jake. i think fandom has actually done a good job with learning how to appreciate jake better in recent years by figuring out just how much of a persona he puts on to hide his intelligence, but since this is a john post, what's really interesting to me is how that might inform the way we view john.

to start, there are some really obvious connections between john & jake that are as clear as jake's first letter to john (A4:1955): both like pretty shitty movies, are allergic to peanuts, and they're practically identical in terms of appearance. what i see as the key connection however, which informs the entirety of homestuck's medium, is their shared social anxiety.

jake is a very socially anxious dude. all of the alphas are characterized by their inability to communicate and navigate interpersonal relationships, but this is especially true for jake, and i think the most obvious evidence for this is in the specific kind of character that he creates for himself. while realistically we know that jake spends most of his time (pre-brobot, at least) watching movies alone in his room, he specifically likes to take on the persona of an adventurous, extroverted action hero, charming and gentlemanly and generally a dumb jock. it's the dumb part that's important here: jake pretends to be a dumbass himbo so that when he fucks up and hurts people when he manipulates them into doing what he wants, he doesn't have to shoulder as much guilt/blame. he plays up being stupid specifically to avoid the agony of people being mad at him, caring way too much about other people's opinions (A6A2:4587). it's why the trickster arc is so painful for him, and also why he is so non-confrontational.

john is also pretty socially anxious, though i think it's a lot more subtle for him since john's upbeat personality isn't entirely a facade in the way that it is for jake. the most obvious evidence for this is again the fact that he only talks to, like, three people online and his dad. despite being 13, none of these kids ever mention jack shit about school or the other members of humanity about to be murdered by meteors from their own game, and i think that's more than just a necessity of the story considering how much homestuck seems to value realism (at least in terms of characters' emotional reactions & arc). john's dad (as pipefan413) clearly knows the neighbors since in the serious business chatting app you can see fedorafreak & the others also talking about escaping meteors, but the existence of any other kids in the neighborhood is unknown, though i would think likely considering john's early arc is set up to be as normal as possible to set up for the crazy bullshit later. (there's also the whole thing about john's peanut allergy + fear of the "peanut gallery" so)

since homestuck tells almost its entire story through the chatlogs of awkward teenagers, this is one key place where i think john's personality informs homestuck: namely, in its focus on isolation, loneliness, and growing up. SPEAKING OF,

3. childhood ignorance

jake isn't dumb, john isn't dumb, but why do so many people think that they are? for jake it's pretty clearly cause he wants it that way, but for john... i think it's cause he kind of. is? but also, he isn't. let me explain:

john often comes across to me as the most 13 year old 13 year old in the cast of homestuck. he's a sweet kid and intelligent enough for his age, but when that age is 13, there's not necessarily a lot there. john has also had the closest (closest. there's still a lot of weird shit there) thing to a Normal™ childhood out of the entire cast of homestuck (and yes that includes jane, she was the heiress to a corporate empire avoiding assassination attempts at 16, please don't call that shit normal), meaning that, in my opinion, a lot of his (lack of) maturity can be attributed to growing up pretty sheltered. where dave and rose had to contend with overt childhood abuse through toxic/neglectful parents, and even jade had to deal with a dog-parent & dead grandpa, john got a dad that actually cared about him.

this is not a bad thing in and of itself, but john being sheltered does mean that by the time they are actually entering the game and interacting with all these other worlds & alien peoples, he is imbued with a certain distinct ignorance of the greater world that becomes a very significant weakness in a story fucking dripping with semi-omniscient narrators that live to make you suffer. and, from the way he scribbles on the walls (A3:1049), this is something john is both aware of and frustrated with, calling himself a FOOL, tying to the tarot card (#1, his role as protagonist), the harlequin thing (clowns & their incredible pull on the meta of homestuck), & his anxieties (feeling ignorant & out of your depth stepping out of childhood into a world much broader and more complex and cruel than you're prepared for)

4. not a homosexual

i think i'm gonna run out of space here, so i'm just gonna copy & paste some hussie commentary here & maybe reblog this w/ some analysis of john & karkat's dynamic/parallels as "leaders" later (and maybe some june thoughts too):

5. successfully saved the world: the hero is depressed

okay, so earlier in part 1 i ended with a question:

but to a kid for whom the entire world feels so far away and empty, how much does that really matter?

i mostly left the answer to this implied earlier since it made more sense for the transition, but i think homestuck proper does give us an answer to this: it does matter! it just isn't until the end of the story, after they've won the game and finished the session, that it really starts to set in the extent of what they've lost.

so this entire post was largely motivated by another post i read earlier, which questioned why john in the snapchat credits didn't just go to live with the crockers. i gave a long ass commentary in the notes on that post, but my conclusion was basically this: john is depressed (!!!) and depression makes you apathetic & lose all motivation to do anything.

i've focused a lot on john's early life and the beginning of the story in this post, which is maybe in part because i've been rereading from the beginning recently, but also because john kind of loses touch with everyone else in the story as soon as he enters the session.

i think this is often read as just being a product of john's classpect, heir of breath. john doesn't just inherit breath when he godtiers, he also becomes it in a very literal sense (can't fucking find the page where he transforms into wind but ugh, whatever), so he when he literally loses touch with the reality of the story after gaining his retcon powers, it follows with the thematic concept of him being breath. this isn't bad, but i think it also goes further, again connecting with that idea that john is basically the "main character" of homestuck, which is actually a very unfortunate title as it means john in particular gets very wrapped up sburb & the story as a whole in a very literal sense. again: retcon powers.

for all my frustrations with the execution of the retcon, i can't deny that it makes a shit ton of sense for john to get those kinds of powers, since his character and position as the starting kid has always been so closely entwined with the story of homestuck as a whole (see: the entire rest of this post). it also ties back to that idea of john being particularly vulnerable as a naive kid in a world of maliciously omniscient characters (e.g. doc scratch, but also vriska/terezi & all of the trolls to some degree), puppetted around by the story and slowly losing all connections with "reality" and the rest of the cast (his friends!!)

you know all those scenes where john starts interacting w/ the shittily-drawn caliborn versions of all his friends? (or this page: (A6I5:6207)) that has always come across as kind of sad to me, because it feels representative of john's (lack of) connections to his friends by that point in the story. he gets so swept up in Plot Bullshit that he basically loses most of the contact he has w/ the people that were his closest friends for years (ik people hate inversion theory but he & karkat really are complementary in some ways), and that loss of connection just exacerbates his previous anxieties about being ignorant. the conversation between him, dave, & karkat on the meteor is really revealing of this (A6A6I5:7487). where dave & karkat & everyone else got three years to sort through their shit together, john was getting dragged off to make the story make sense again, technically completely losing everyone he had known and grown up with. it's not just that dad crocker is different: everyone is different.

(this also has the kind of even more depressing alternate implication that john doesn't even really get the chance to feel that difference outside of jade, since he wasn't able to connect with "his" original dave, rose, etc. in the pre-retcon timeline regardless. great!)

john's depression has always been one of my favorite parts of his character arc tbh, which ig is a weird thing to say, but it just makes so much sense to me as the next step in his story, if not the true conclusion. it's only after winning the game that john really starts to catch up with everyone else in terms of maturity and understanding, and by that point, when everyone already feels so far ahead, how could he possibly catch up? (the answer is that he can, just not alone, but it is that exact feeling of not being able to that makes him isolate in the first place. depression is a fucking shithole)

so much of homestuck is about loneliness, but in turn so much of homestuck is also about social connections, about the people around you that you love and care about and change your life. where karkat is able to heal the connections of the people around him by helping them through their interpersonal relationship bullshit, john gets caught in the wind of the plot and loses his connections, thus losing his ability to really mature as a person at the same rate as everyone else (not to mention how he might've felt behind in the first place). but still, even w/ john's arc ending on a heavy, perhaps unsatisfying note at the end of homestuck proper, i like to think there's still a lot of hope for him: after all, his dearest friends and family are all right there. he just needs to get off his ass and start talking to them.

(sidenote: while editing this part of the post, i suddenly realized just how sad it is that karkat and john talk so goddamn little in all of the post-canon shit. which fucking sucks actually because karkat would be the perfect person to yell at someone until they finally get off their ass and start trying to be a person again, exactly what john needs after the game imho. pumpkin route you are forming in my mind)

uhh anyways, i don't know how good of a job i did at tying this post back to my original goal, but if you read this far, thank you. i have been typing nonstop for like four straight hours (ᵃⁿᵈ ᵗʰᶦʳᵗᵉᵉⁿ ᵐᶦⁿᵘᵗᵉˢˀ) and i think my right ring finger is about to fall off.

bonus: 6. john is hussie???

OKAY, actual finale, this is quick and dumb but this idea comes pretty much entirely from a couple random lines of hussie commentary from a john & dave conversation on (A2:324):

John makes some pretty sassy quips here. I like the "15th day in a row" line, which makes sense since I was the one who actually said it in a real conversation about this.

most people make the connection between hussie & dave (& dirk, i suppose) since dave's sense of humor is basically just unfiltered hussie, but this comment makes me wonder what was put into john too (though i suppose you could consider all fictional characters imbued with some aspect of their author). i'm not super into psychoanalyzing hussie as a person through homestuck itself, but if you're into that, here ya go.

[pan-de-queer]

valleys behind your kneecaps (supercorp)

Genre: Fluff, No Powers AU

Summary:

Sam clasps her hands together as she leans almost halfway over the table. “Will you please do this for me?” “Sam—” “I’ll never complain about your restaurant choices ever again, you can keep the modeling payment, and I’ll buy you lunch for two weeks straight.” “I’m an heiress, Sam, I really don’t need the payment or free lunch.” “That last part wasn’t a bribe, it’s a threat.” Lena scoffs, rolling her eyes as she fights a smile. “Fine. I’ll do your little modeling thing.”

Or: Lena's a med student, Kara's an artist, and somehow they still fall in love.

Author's Note: i did a writing test for work and i couldn't get my head to write original blorbos without an outline so i wrote supercorp instead and then changed the names so this is the og of that test (but longer bc i can't shut up about these idiots fr) oh also happy belated(??) valentines i guess! title from Kindling by Caitlyn Siehl and unbetaed for now (knowing me, the fic might get longer when i edit lol)

UPDATE: i edited :))) and added around 500+ words

ao3

valleys behind your kneecaps

Lena rarely ever gets time for herself.

It comes with the territory, she knows that. Being a med student means sacrificing a lot to become the doctor the Luthors have always expected of her.

It probably helps that her social life wasn’t all that affected.

Her grand total of three friends all understood the pressure she was under and the work she constantly has to do to stay on top. Still, that didn’t mean they didn’t force her to take a break every now and then.

Which is how Lena finds herself here, at Noonan���s, enjoying brunch with Sam on a sunny Thursday morning. Or, well, she was enjoying it until Sam gets a call from Ruby’s school and asks for a favor. A weird one.

“You want me to model for you?” Lena laughs, her sides cramping up. She laughs so hard she chokes on her kale and salmon salad. She laughs until she realizes that Sam isn’t laughing along. Until she realizes that Sam is dead serious.

“Oh.” Lena blinks, jaw clamping shut at Sam’s wide, pleading eyes.

“Please, Lena, it’s in half an hour and they wouldn’t be able to find a replacement so last minute and you know how Ruby gets when I make her wait.”

“She gets it from you,” Lena scoffs, dusting nonexistent dirt off the spot next to her coffee. “Besides, shouldn’t I be coming along to check on Ruby’s health?”

“Okay, first of all, rude! Secondly, you’re a medical student training to be a surgeon, not a pedia.”

“It’s not like I don’t know enough of the basics to check on her.”

“No. The school nurse already gave her the all-clear she just needs to go home and rest. Now.” Sam clasps her hands together as she leans almost halfway over the table. “Will you please do this for me?”

“Sam—”

“I’ll never complain about your restaurant choices ever again, you can keep the modeling payment, and I’ll buy you lunch for two weeks straight.”

“I’m an heiress, Sam, I really don’t need the payment or free lunch.”

“That last part wasn’t a bribe, it’s a threat.”

Lena scoffs, rolling her eyes as she fights a smile. “Fine. I’ll do your little modeling thing.”

“Thank you, thank you, thank you!” Sam drops a sloppy kiss on Lena’s forehead before she grabs her things, backing away with her purse in one hand and her phone in the other. “The class is in Studio C. Just tell the instructor I sent you! Thank you!”

Sam disappears out the doors before her last thank you even ends and Lena’s left alone with her half-eaten brunch and a sudden appointment to keep.

The things Lena does for her friends.

With a sigh, Lena finishes her salad and coffee before exiting the café that stood right across the cursed art studio. Sam had been modeling part-time for DEO Studio for almost two years now and had even invited Lena and their usual friend group (consisting of Jack and Andrea) to take some beginner’s classes for fun. Lena had never accepted the offer, of course, what with all the studying and hospital rounds she always had to do, but she’d always been supportive of her friend’s varying choice of part-time jobs (she kept trying to convince Sam to just ask for a raise, after all, she’d been the one to convince Lex to hire her, but Sam was too much of a wimp to negotiate with Lillian).

As Lena walks across the cracked, paved street and pushes open clear, glass doors, she wonders if she’s being a little too supportive this time.

The inside of the studio is clean and minimalist, brick walls painted white surrounds the space with a simple, wooden front desk greeting everyone who enters. A small waiting lounge is lined up in front of the studio’s towering glass windows and the walls have fewer paintings and pictures than Lena assumed there’d be in an art studio. A large, sculpted art piece stands off to the side to seemingly make up for the lack of them.

“Hello! Welcome to DEO Studio.” A young woman greets her from behind the desk. “Can I help you with anything?”

Lena shuffles towards the reception desk, the weight of Sam’s favor slowly starting to hit her. “Um, yes. My friend, Samantha Arias, had an emergency to take care of and asked me to sub-in for her modeling work today.”

Truly, the strangest, almost laughable sentence she’s ever said.

Lena?

A model?

Ha!

“Oh! Yes, I’m familiar with Sam. I’m Nia!” Nia stands to offer her a handshake and despite the nerves starting to creep into her chest, Lena takes it with all the poise of an heiress.

“Hi, Nia. Lena. Sam said that the class is in Studio C and that I should tell the instructor she sent me?”

“Yes, alright, let me lead you to the studio and I can explain the situation to the instructor.”

Nia circles around the desk to lead her down the entrance to the left and Lena follows with a soft, “Thank you so much.”

Lena folds her hands behind her back to keep them from twisting, a habit Lillian is still trying to fix. Instead, Lena focuses on the way the studio is laid out, channeling her nerves into taking stock of her surroundings. The hallways are as white and nondescript as the front room, but Lena takes note of the two photography studios and a sculpting studio that they pass before stopping at a nondescript glass door at the end of the hall.

Nia enters first and holds the door open for her to follow. When she enters, the first thing Lena notices is that while the room remains white, paintings and drawings and posters litter two free walls from floor to ceiling. One wall is covered with shelving, closets, cabinets, and a dressing room, neatly labeled with big, printed stickers, while a huge panel of windows cover the wall opposite the door. A small, raised platform stands in the middle of the room, far enough from the door to be difficult to see immediately but right in the middle of the well-lit room.

Seven easels circle the platform with three of the wooden chairs accompanying each easel already occupied by an artist setting up their sketchpad and materials. An eighth easel stands in the far left corner of the room, farthest from the windows and door, and has a tall, tan goddess standing next to it who seems occupied with organizing her own materials.

Lena is frozen at the sight of the woman, but Nia walks straight towards the Adonis of a blonde, exchanging a hushed conversation that includes a few glances her way that Lena uses as an excuse to politely take a look at the woman she assumes she’s working with.

The maybe-instructor is taller than her, looking down at Nia with a furrow between her blonde brows and an adorable tilt to her head. She wears cute, blocky glasses that frame eyes that, without even seeing them, Lena knows are gorgeous. Plump pink lips are twisted into a frown as the woman nods at whatever Nia is telling her. She’s dressed in a comfy-looking plaid button up, the sleeves rolled up tightly on her forearms and her biceps obviously straining under the cotton. Before Lena’s gaze can fall any lower, though, Nia and the maybe-instructor start walking her way and Lena’s breath catches as she finally gets a good look at the woman’s face.

Bright blue eyes crinkle adorably at the corners as a tan nose wrinkles over a welcoming grin. Lena is pretty sure the woman’s smile can stop wars. It was art in itself.

“Hi!” The woman of Lena’s dreams greets with an outstretched hand as they come to a stop in front of her. “Nia told me that you’re subbing in for Sam and I’m really thankful for the assist! I’m Kara, Kara Danvers.”

By some miracle, Lena’s brain manages to react before she can even fully process what’s happening. Her hand slipping into a warm, calloused one as she replies, “Lena. I’m happy to be here.”

“And we’re glad to have you!” Kara beams, her smile somehow brightening even more. “Follow me and I’ll show you what you’ll be doing for today’s class.”

Like a moth to a flame, Lena followed Kara through the studio, barely remembering to thank Nia for the guidance as Kara starts talking a mile a minute.

“So today’s class is an intermediate drawing class, so everyone’s used to working with a model already. We normally start every model-work class with quick line sketching before you have to do the whole sitting still for an hour thing.” Just when Lena thinks Kara’s finished her explanation, her eyes widen and she keeps going. “Oh! Did Sam tell you you’d have to be sitting still for this? It can feel kind of awkward and cramp-y at first but if you need any breaks you can just signal me and I can give you a minute or two to stretch but—”

“Kara.” Lena lays a hand on the art instructor’s strong, broad shoulder, realizing that if she continued to keep quiet then Kara will never stop. “I get it, it’s fine. And I’ve modeled before, kind of.”

Luthor Corp promotionals and Lillian’s constant need to showcase the perfect family image definitely counts as modeling in Lena’s book.

“Oh! Really? That’s so cool!” Kara seems to breathe a little easier at her touch. “Are you, like, a professional model or something?”

Lena laughs, flattered but also mystified. She knew she had some looks, as many of the wealthy creeps and paparazzi liked to remind her, but she was far from model material. Lillian made sure to remind her of that every time she was pictured out in public.

Still, the fact that Kara thinks so is sweet.

“No, I’m definitely not model material,” Lena shakes her head, smile wry and shoulders tight. “I’m a med student.”

Kara hums, lips pursed thoughtfully. “Yeah, I guess it wouldn’t be all that fair if you were a model. You’d be too perfect. Beauty and brains? Definitely cheating.”

Heat blooms from Lena’s neck to her cheeks, Kara’s smile widening as blue eyes seem to trace every touch of pink on her face. Hoping to pull the attention away from her flaming cheeks, Lena ducks her head and asks, “So, what do I need to do first?”

The question seems to snap Kara back into work mode, because then, Lena’s being shown the different kinds of poses most class models go for before being offered a floor pillow or a chair to model on. Lena chooses the chair and only has enough time to thank Kara for carrying it to the platform before the class begins.

Introductions are made briefly at the start as Lena’s the only new person amongst the group, and then the actual class and modeling starts. Lena builds a rhythm with the warm up sketches, getting comfortable with quick poses and holding them for a minute before moving on to the next. The room is filled with the sound of pencil scratching paper and Lena feels the most relaxed she’s been in years.

There’s something freeing about being a small class model. She isn’t striking any kind of dramatic pose and yet every movement is art. Every slouch of her shoulders and stretch of her leg is something these people can turn beautiful.

(It also helps that Kara praises her after every pose, a warmth Lena refuses to name surrounding her from the inside out.)

A few minutes later, Kara moves to stand next to Lena on the platform with her sketchpad in hand and starts the actual drawing lessons. Lena finds herself captivated with the way Kara speaks, passionate and excited and bright. She watches sure, strong hands wave in every direction, blue eyes widening and narrowing with every explanation and example Kara gives. Eventually, Kara returns to her easel and calls for everyone to start drawing in detail, and Lena manages to fall into a pose sitting comfortably in the direction of the instructor herself.

She uses the position to give her an excuse to look Kara’s way. Watches blonde brows furrowing as Kara stares at her own sketchpad with a slight pout to her pink lips. Steady fingers make varying strokes on the paper as a slender wrist twists this way and that. It’s only a couple minutes later that Lena notices the constant rhythm of Kara’s pencil strokes suddenly still. Green eyes move from long fingers to broad shoulders to tilted lips and then sparkling blues.

Busted.

Kara seems amused at catching Lena staring, even a little pleased if Lena were to believe her imagination. But Lena was never much of a believer, so she put on her Luthor mask and pushed back her embarrassment at being caught, raising a challenging brow instead.

Kara only responds with a smug smile before diving back into her own drawing.

Lena lets out a shaky breath as the attention (or Kara’s attention, at least) shifts. She tries to return to her previous position and attempts to focus on the art scattering the wall.

She fails.

Green eyes unintentionally stray towards bright blue eyes and perfect blonde hair, and then the cycle repeats.

Lena stares.

She gets caught.

Kara smiles.

Rinse.

Repeat.

Fall.

By the time Kara finally calls for everyone to show their drawings, Lena almost feels as if they were flirting.

But why would a walking goddess flirt with her?

“Alright, class!” Kara claps her hands as Lena leans against one of the art-covered walls, finally free from sitting in the middle of the room. “Great work today! I can see that you’re all getting faster and some of you are even developing your own art styles. Keep practicing and I’ll see you all next week!”

The students all leave, none seemingly interested in staying behind for a chat but all giving Kara and Lena a quick glance as they leave.

(So maybe she threw subtle out the window after Kara caught her staring the first time. Sue her.)

Once the last student makes their way out, Kara steps off the platform and makes her way over, smile tilted on her pretty, pink lips.

“You stayed,” Kara’s voice is soft, breathy.

“Well,” Lena smiles, feels her chest warming at the way Kara says it. “I-” was hoping to ask you out. I think you’re super hot; here’s my number. I am so gay. All excellent and accurate choices, really, and yet the words that come out of Lena’s mouth are: “I wasn’t sure if you paid Sam after every class or every month.”

Kara’s eyes widen before a sheepish smile replaces it and suddenly Lena feels like she’s fucked up. “Oh, I almost forgot. I mean, I didn’t! I never forget to pay Sam. Fair pay! Y’know? Um, just, sorry, the modeling payment’s usually with Nia or J’onn.”

Lena feels the warmth start to fade as Kara takes a noticeable step back. Oh. Fuck.

“Wait!” Lena winces at the volume of her own voice but lets out a breath as she watches Kara freeze. “Sorry, I meant, um, I don’t need the payment right now. Or ever, really.”

Kara’s brows furrow as Lena tries to sort through her thoughts. “Well that doesn’t sound fair, Lena. We make it a practice to pay everyone who works for us. I’m pretty sure it’s both unethical and illegal to not pay your employees and when you model for us, you’re technically like a freelance employee. So we’ll obviously pay you for your time.”

“Kara?” Lena rushes in the second Kara pauses for a breath.

“Yeah?”

“I understand the legal requirements and all, but I did this as a favor for a friend, so what I meant was that you can keep the payment and give it to Sam, instead.” Lena smiles, aiming for reassuring. “I don’t need the money, and, honestly, the payment thing wasn’t what I really wanted to say.”

Kara sucks in a breath at the admission, blue eyes wide as a hopeful look crosses her face. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” Lena sucks in a breath, rocking back and forth on the balls of her feet as she tries to pluck any semblance of courage to ask a ridiculously gorgeous girl out.

“I really liked your lesson,” Lena starts, far from what she was hoping to say but a start nonetheless.

“Thanks,” Kara smiles, earnest but a little confused. “You did great for a non-professional model.”

Lena chuckles in reply, smile crooked as she tries to bite it down. “Thanks. I had some high expectations to meet.”

“Well, consider them met.”

And Kara’s so sincere, so cute as she stuffs her pencil-smudged hands into her pockets, that Lena decides, fuck it. What does she have to lose? She can ask Kara out and get a date or simply avoid the woman for the rest of her life. Easy.

“Kara,” Lena lets out a breath, green eyes glued to the paint splatter stuck on Kara’s faded sneakers. “I was wondering if you’d like to have coffee some time.”

The words on a date are stuck in her throat, but Lena considers it a big enough win that she asked at all. So she waits, lungs frozen and heart drumming in her chest for a rejection she expects and a miracle she hopes for. She’s focusing on keeping her breathing steady when a warm hand envelopes hers. Slowly, she looks up to find Kara beaming, a smile brighter than every single smile Kara’s given her today combined, blonde waves bouncing up and down excitedly.

“I’d love to have coffee with you some time.” Lena feels Kara’s hand squeeze hers gently before blue eyes crinkle further as Kara’s smile widens impossibly brighter. “But only on one condition.”

“Anything.” Lena says. Everything, she thinks.

Kara leans in closer, close enough that Lena can tell each shade of blue in her eyes. “Can coffee be a date?”

And Lena laughs, because yes. Yes. “I’d love nothing more.”

[butchfalin]

the funniest meltdown ive ever had was in college when i got so overstimulated that i could Not speak, including over text. one of my friends was trying to talk me through it but i was solely using emojis because they were easier than trying to come up with words so he started using primarily emojis as well just to make things feel balanced. this was not the Most effective strategy... until. he tried to ask me "you okay?" but the way he chose to do that was by sending "👉🏼👌🏼❓" and i was so shocked by suddenly being asked if i was dtf that i was like WHAT???? WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME?????????? and thus was verbal again

[sayruq]

likes to cast reblog to charge

[cozylittleartblog]

@staff if you [change] the [design] of the fucking [dashboard] i will kill you

edit. i want it on the actual post that i am not actually making a de-th threat against the staff. that's shitty. the caption quotes the fucking costco hot dog meme, which i originally said in the tags. if any staff member sees this please do Not take it personally

[greyias]

Oh look, it seems everyone has been opted into the unfortunate "experiment" now. For everyone who has been blissfully using the old UI up until now, welcome to hell :)

Do you not like hell? Do you want to leave and crawl back up into the sunlight of the old UI? Well, have I got a link for you! A beautiful tumblr user (who is not me) has gone and fixed things beautifully for you already: https://github.com/enchanted-sword/dashboard-unfucker

You will need to have Tampermonkey installed on your browser of choice, and once that's done, just go to the github link above, and peruse the readme to install. And voila! You have your old dash back!

The authors of XKit Rewritten said during the experiments that at the time, since this was an "experiment" they weren't going to implement anything to revert to the old UI (although who knows if they'll do it now). And the dashboard unfucker has worked beautifully enough for me to where I genuinely couldn't tell if they had ended the experiment or not.

[howsdeanshole]

lazarus rising - castiel, in acrylic gouache

[anbaisai]

somebody help him 💔

[watcher0033]

Y’all, the Archive admins are made up of VOLUNTEERS. And they have been working for 12-13 HOURS STRAIGHT.

I better not hear any complaints when donation period comes around. OR ELSE.

cosplay by @woahchriswoah on Twitter

EDIT: How do we show appreciation to the volunteers? For me reading these deep dives on OTW issues u guys apparently it's been said multiple times that one of their objective statements is to have paid staff for ao3 and there's a surplus of donations they haven't used up or the other community solutions that needs to address. For those more financially literate feel free to analyze, snipe me or add to the discussion etc. linked here by deepa. They’re cool and these yearly analysis they did aint no joke.

But Seriously what can we do for these volunteers? The probable burn out from this entire fiasco would be no joke. @ao3org

[theboxfort]

[Image Description: A white text box: "Accounts created after May 8th, 2023 have the 'For You' tab as the default dashboard tab. Other existing users' dashboard tabs are not changed. We are also working on making dashboard tabs even more customizable, including adding the ability to choose which tab appears first." End ID.]

From the latest update (June 2nd, 2023)

Oh, fuck this. If you're a new user, don't forget to set your dashboard to Following and turn "Based on your likes" and "Best stuff first" off

EDIT: A few corrections

For new users, you can't change the default back to Following. This means that whenever you open up your app/go to your dash, the first tab you'll see is the For You tab

Note for the previous point, I can't confirm this since my account is rather old, if anybody has an examples, I'd appreciate it

Yes, some people mentioned that you don't have to turn off Based on your likes and Best stuff first, but that's mostly my preference since (to me at least) it does not work, it just shows me random shit that is absolutely not based on my likes

My main problem with this update is that it strips the user from being able to choose what they wanted to see. It's totally cool if you use the For You tab, but it shouldn't be the default option

Additional points from the tags and reblogs:

You can turn off public likes and followings, again, not mandatory, but it's an option

Make sure to turn off Tumblr Live (pretty sure it's only available to US users, which I am not one) since it apparently drains mobile data

There are (browser) addons and extensions that allows you to block elements or make your tumblr experience better, like uBlock Origin (an adblocker which can be used to block certain elements from showing up) and the XKit Control Panel/New XKit

[johnconstantinesdick]

The most popular fic in the Steel Samurai fandom had an unexplained seven year hiatus only to update at like 3 am on December 21st, 2027. The author explains that they couldn’t update fic while in prison (huh?) but now that they’re off death row (WHAT??) they’ve transcribed seven years worth of writing (Jesus Christ). The update is 130k words long. Edgeworth and Maya don’t sleep that night.

[badolmen]

Five Dollar Fridays!

Can you spare $5 this week? If not, please reblog this post so it reaches someone who can!

Otherwise, please donate $5 to one of the following verified fundraisers for families in Palestine and then reblog this post:

(verification) Sohaip's Family (£1.070/£10.000) [10.7%]

(verification) Basel's Family (CHF 8.238/CHF 60.000) [13.7%]

(verification) Muhammad's Family (€17.375/€82.000) [21.2%]

(verification) Malak's Family (€6.688/€25.000) [26.8%]

(verification) Moamen's Family ($8.218/$30.000) [27.4%]

(verification) Samer’s Family (kr 139.822/kr 450.000) [31.1%] *note $1 = kr 10 conversion rate; ie. goal is roughly $45.000

(verification) Nadaa's Family (£8.967/£25.000) [35.9%]

(verification) Musab's Family (£6.613/£18.000) [36.7%] *new goal and campaign, see here.

(verification) Nabila's Family ($3.685/$10.000) [36.9%]

(verification) Wafaa's Family ($21.225/$50.000) [42.5%] *new campaign, see here.

(verification) Asmaa's Family (€21.157/€45.000) [47.0%]

(verification) Laila's Family (€30.693/€45.000) [68.2%]

(verification) Youssef's Family (€15.758/€23.000) [68.5%]

(verification) Mohammed's Family (€30.531/€40.000) [76.3%] *new goal

(verification) Amira's Family (€30.078/€39.000) [77.1%]

(verification) Mohammad's Family (€28.987/€37.000) [78.3%]

(verification) Fadi's Family ($39.973/$50.000) [79.9%] *new goal, see here.

(verification) Nada’s Family (€14.474/€16.000) [90.5%]

(verification) Abdelrahman's Family (€18.903/€20.000) [94.5%]

(verification) Yousef's Family (€18.971/€20.000) [94.8%] *new campaign, see here.

Time stamp: Sep. 20, 2024

More information and campaigns under the read more.

(Conversions: $5 = kr52.36, €4.66, £3.89, CHF4.30)

Daily Campaigns @writing-prompts-for-palestine

Match Me Monday

Ten Dollar Tuesdays

Do Something Saturdays

*** the follow campaign has been closed/is no longer accepting donations. I am looking for an update from the vetters or organizers.

(verification) Tala’s Family (€13.967/€40.000) [34.9%]

[attyrocious]

with love to spare 💕

(belated) happy birthday, corazon!

[sayruq]

Gaza's municipality is trying to raise money to fix and restore Gaza's water system. Please support them by boosting and/or donating

[literaryvein-reblogs]

Writing References: Character Development

50 Questions ⚜ "Well-Rounded Character" Worksheet

Basics: How to Write a Character ⚜ A Story-Worthy Hero

Basics: Character-Building ⚜ Character Creation

Key Characters ⚜ Literary Characters ⚜ Morally Grey Characters

Personality Traits

5 Personality Traits (OCEAN) ⚜ 16 Personality Traits (16PF)

600+ Personality Traits

East vs. West Personalities ⚜ Trait Theories

Tips/Editing

Character Issues

Character Tropes for Inspiration

Tips from Rick Riordan

Writing Notes

Allegorical Characters

Binge ED

Childhood Bilingualism ⚜ Children's Dialogue ⚜ On Children

Culture ⚜ Culture: Two Views ⚜ Culture Shock

Emotional Intelligence ⚜ Genius (Giftedness)

Emotions ⚜ Anger ⚜ Fear ⚜ Happiness ⚜ Sadness

Facial Expressions

Fantasy Creatures

Happy/Excited Body Language ⚜ Laughter & Humor

Hate ⚜ Love

Health ⚜ Frameworks of Health

Identifying Character Descriptions

Jargon ⚜ Logical Fallacies ⚜ Memory

Mutism ⚜ Shyness

Parenting Styles

Psychological Reactions to Unfair Behavior

Rhetoric ⚜ The Rhetorical Triangle

Swearing & Taboo Expressions

Thinking ⚜ Thinking Styles ⚜ Thought Distortions

Uncommon Words: Body ⚜ Emotions

Voice & Accent

Writing References: Plot ⚜ World-building

[t4t4t]

Hi !

I got bottom surgery on July 25th :3

I'm recovering well but I'll be on bedrest for a while. Collie and I will need rent help for September/food/gas/utilities/etc. Two disabled trans women. Anything helps ! Thank yall so much for all you've helped so far, it's saved my life ❤️

https://venmo.com/u/nora-esther-rose

https://www.paypal.me/NoraEstherRose

https://venmo.com/u/Leah-Esther-Rose

https://www.paypal.me/androgynophore