#unpleasent for both you and me | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

loadinghellsing · 5 months ago

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Available on Redbubble !!! (Manga Ver.) (Anime Ver.)

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tangledinink · 1 year ago

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new gemini update was so good as always but I can't stop thinking:

big mama: there's nothing wrong with my sons

splinter: you fucked up two perfectly good kids is what you did. look at blue. he's got an eating disorder

wwhhhattttt? nooo, don't be silly. leo doesn't have an eating disorder.

leo and donnie have eating disorders--

#this is a Joke but also No It's Not #it's just different flavors lmao #but both of them have absolutely fucked relationships with food #my poor babies... :(... who did this to you...?#(it was me i did)#leo spends a lot of time worrying about whAT hes eating and how mUCH hes eating and if hes eating the rIGHT thing #largely due to his mom and also just being a celebrity/child celebrity in general #but also in part due to:#donnie has a lot of food sensitivities which have really never been accommodated for at all and as a result he just #has a very negative association with food and eating. he doesnt LIKE eating and he avoids it a majority of the time.#its stressful and unpleasant and he doesnt like it #which ofc only gave leo another reason to hyperfixate on food and calories and nutritional value etc etc etc #which leads to #ironically #leo (who def has an undiagnosed ed and restricts/denies himself food regularly): worrying abt making sure donnie eats enough #donnie will do the same thing back sometimes but not with the same obsessiveness that leo does #esp because the ideals surrounding eating and dieting set up around them really kind of just #lead them both to believe (at least to an extent) that leo is fine and eats a totally healthy and ok amount of food (esp in comparison to d #(no he doesnt)(and even when he does thats not the point)#tw eating disorders #cw eating disorders #eating disorders #tw disorders eating #cw disordered eating #disordered eating #gemini au asks #asks #anon

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codenamesazanka · 6 months ago

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Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy the false sense of peace All Might and Heroes created

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Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy everything that lead to the existence of that house, which he conceptualizes as the embodiment of rejection and injustice in the world. Be a Hero for the Villains.

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AFO basically literally created that house

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Shigaraki/Tenko helps defeat AFO

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Deku telling him 'you already destroyed it' is... apparently Shigaraki/Tenko having finally gotten rid of the true cause of (his) rejection and injustice? main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society... solved? (main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society not actually being the problem he thought it was but now also solved?)

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No longer a need for there to be a Hero for the Villains, Shigaraki/Tenko dies.

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Heroes not to be blamed in the first place. also fuck everyone else and all other 'actual' outcasts I guess.

#i understand that Tenko not having 'supposed' to be rejected doesn't mean the rejection didn't occur for the other League members #but taking that away from Tenko/Shigaraki - leader of the League of Villains - wanting to be their champion #symbolically being their collective grievances and wills condensed into one #taking that away makes the story a lot weaker #GOD what happened #nalslastworkingbraincell #honestly making everything AFO's fault #and making Tenko's main issue being his despair toward himself (created by AFO)#allowed for the (seemingly for now) clean resolution of 'get rid of the both of them' possible #It's AFO's fault? Kill him! Problem solved #Tenko's issue not actually *harm caused by other (non-AFO) people* but instead *harm caused by his self-conceptualization/his own self*?#Tenko's projecting his own self-loathing and anger onto the world and causing trouble for everyone and making his crusade meaningless?#let him die too. Pity but problem solved!#AFO gave him the specific quirk that was Decay because it was such a brutal and deadly quirk that would guarantee rejection #you cannot tell me he could've been fine after manifesting Decay if only AFO wasn't there to tell him he has an innate need to destroy #not after what we've seen of Shinsou and Toga #other 'normal' people would not have let him live a normal life #that *is* also very much a problem that should be addressed #but it was AFO who gave him Decay and Decay was also actually not naturally existing #so everything's fine! no changes for anyone!#all this could've been saved if this was transferred to AFO - AFO also seen as a victim of societal apathy #especially since he was BORN A TRASH RIVER RAT ORPHAN #but he's just a lonely guy who was too unpleasant to form real relationships #so. only real issue Hero Society ever had that needed to be addressed was civilians being too hard on Heroes #gotta love them more and demand less of them #yippee

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anaalnathrakhs · 6 months ago

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love this part of my life where the things that are difficult but challenging and good for me are things i can stop and skip and halfass, but the things that are difficult and painful and pointless are the things i have to live with no matter what

#school and home life are too much to handle so i skip school #because i cant kick my parents out #and appartments cost money #and i dont have a car to sleep in #i could maybe try to dig up my old childhood tent but that brings a whole host of logistic questions + im scared and it's difficult #anyway. it's fine. it's cool. i just have to hold on until i graduate high shcool and then ?????#find a way to live without my parents money OR scholarships #all for some nebulous end goal of having a job (the only field i'm interested in and good at offers two options:#to become an academic #or to become a freelancer #i do not have the fortitude to be an academic and being a freelancer is convoluted and pays like shit)#i might've spent 24h without my parents occasionally if i spent the night at a friend's place once or twice recently #but besides that the last time i've gone 48h without my parents was when the mental health center organised a week camp uhhhh...#two summers ago #incredibly good for my mental health as you can see #god i remember like... years ago. around 13yo maybe or 14. a guy. i dont know if he was a mental health professional or like social cases #but anyway he told me ''you're too afraid to be away from mommy and daddy'' and it made me want to rip his eyes out #several other people have implied or suggested that too over the years and it's just #am i too dependant on my parents? yes. will it be difficult to take my independance? yes.#does it means i don't both rationally recognize and feel that this is really fucking unhealthy and hindering for me #on top of being unpleasant?#FUCK NO #i want out my guy. there's just not many opportunities for an already mentally ill teenager #now that i'm eighteen i have to grapple with the logistical problems of the money needed and how to continue my education #and im sure a billion more if i start searching a little more seriously #perhaps i should kill myself that way i don't cost anyone any more money #broadcasting my misery #vent

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impactrueno · 1 month ago

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Well one good thing came of this, you mentioned hey pretty and I got to find out it got re-uploaded a few years ago and finally I could watch it again after idk like 15 years. Also ur art is ballin

thank you!

man i had that amv downloaded onto my ipod video and everything when i was in high school... that song is so fucking good that even though my feelings about the ship changed, i still can't help but associate it with the surreal vibes of the cartoon and it's still one of my favorite songs ever. total banger

#also since i got people from both sides of the fandom following me i should probably note #it's a beetlebabes amv so if the ship makes you uncomf dont look it up and simply try to avoid it on youtube #just so my non-shipper followers are aware and don't run into an unpleasant surprise

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semiotomatics · 2 months ago

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lol. i think ive reached my limit.

#i just cannot take this torture anymore #ive been at the mercy of this horrible disease for over half my life now #imagine living knowing that roughly every 3.5 weeks youre going to experience the most excruciating pain of your life #along with crushing. usually suicidal depression. and such extreme fatigue and exhaustion that you easily sleep for 14+ hours a DAY #AND ITS ALL FOR FUCKING *NOTHING*#there is literally ZERO benefit or reason for me to be experiencing this #it is 100% extraneous #and even if you go to a dr and try to get treatment their only recommendation is 1) pain killers and/or 2) birth control #which both come with their own fucking share of unpleasant side effects #not to mention theyre not even 100% effective at stopping the problem in the first FUCKING place #and imagine even tho you have this DEBILITATING DISORDER society at large has decided it straight up DOESNT EXIST #to the point where REAL ACTUAL MEDICAL PROFESSIONALS will dismiss your symptoms #not to mention people in your life who dont understand or just straight up dont believe your disorder is real #good luck keeping a job or any other major commitments #considering you'll either be out of commission for like. 1 out of ever 4 weeks #or youll have to work/whatever WHILE experiencing said excruciating pain/crushing depression/debilitating exhaustion #not to mention the GI issues and the migraines and the brain fog and the fucking. full body aches #wanna go to a concert? or plan a vacation? or just. fucking. RELAX? you better hope its not during Hell Week or youre outta luck #and youve got roughly 30-40 YEARS of this to look forward to #maybe less IF YOURE LUCKY #im fucking over it #i cant take it anymore #im making an appt to see a dr and i WILL NOT LEAVE THEIR OFFICE until they have referred me to whoever i have to talk to to make this stop #my fucking fury at having to live like this has officially outweighed my fear of invasive procedures/recovery time/side effects #let along the torture that is navigating the medical care system as an AFAB #i just. i cant do this anymore.#i want to fucking LIVE #fuck

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uncanny-tranny · 11 months ago

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Fiber arts (crochet and knit, especially) tip I found helpful: It's great to be a yarn snob, but first, find what you actually like to work with. When you're beginning, you might be working with acrylic, and that's fine. There are plenty of great options for acrylic, and even that one material can be vastly different between brands (honestly, I think people don't recognize this enough! Acrylics are actually a diverse material!). However, you might like working with other materials more as you progress, and it's good to see what you'll like! I've been working with 100% cotton recently, and I really, really like it - much moreso than the acrylic I bought when I first crocheted, and I never knew that I would have liked it more.

It's okay to work with whatever you can, especially when it's your only option. When you get the chance, though, think about some things you like in a material. What textures do you like? What colour options do you prefer (bright/muted/natural)? What is realistic for you when it comes to caring for your projects once they're done? These are all important, and they're things that are specific for you. There is no such thing as a "bad material," only materials you like and want to use. It can be intimidating to feel like you're not at this pristine place of yarn-snobbery, but truthfully: it doesn't matter as long as you make things that you like, and being able to explore what you like can be really helpful.

#art #fiber art #knit #crochet #i think this could apply to other forms of fober crafts but i'm not well-versed enough to make such a sweeping generalization <3 #i know sometimes people use 'yarn snob' to say that they are very specific in what they like and that it's not indicating...#...that they think they're somehow 'above' a person with less expertise or experience...#...i just think sometimes beginners can be (understandably) intimidated by all of it...#...and you can start really over-thinking your decisions and if you're Doing Art Right rather than just Doing Art #it's the Doing Art *Right* that will often set you back #it's OKAY to use whatever is both available to you and is of a quality you like #like i don't MIND acrylic - the one i'm using for the fazbeanie is an acrylic...#...in fact the fazbeanie yarn (Big Twist 100% acrylic in chocolate brown) made me learn that acrylic can have really nice softness...#...and it's a very smooth acrylic too. this other skein i got for practice was. very unpleasant for an acrylic #ANYWAY. rant over. for now.

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tj-crochets · 1 year ago

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Hey y'all! Weird question time again, this time a question I'm hoping will save me an asthma attack or three. The deodorant I've used for years is no longer being made, and the deodorant aisle at the store is kind of, uh, difficult for my asthma, so I'm hoping if I share the name of the deodorant I know I can use and a list of smells I know I can't, y'all might have some suggestions for replacements? Below a read more

Okay, so the deodorant I've used for years is Old Spice's Hawkridge deodorant. I don't need something that smells the exact same, I just need something that won't trigger my asthma. Luckily, I don't really have sensitive skin, so the only non-smell ingredient I need to avoid is coconut. Smells I can't have: - cinnamon - mint (or any menthol) - cedar - smoke - fake musk smells? the whole, like, fake leather smelling "dude" section of bath and bodyworks isn't an asthma trigger but is an insta-headache and I'd rather avoid it - strong flower smells of any kind - coconut - pine Smells I like, which would be a bonus to have: - citrus - vanilla/ambergris/oud honestly anything along those lines, stuff that might be described as smelling "warm" (I don't really know perfume description words, can you tell? lol) If you have any suggestions for deodorants that don't have any of the asthma-trigger smells, I'd really appreciate it. Or suggestions for lotions, honestly, winter's coming up and it would be nice to have something nicer smelling than Aveeno to be able to use. Thank you!!

#the person behind the yarn #it is kinda frustrating that they stopped making the one I used to use #I mean. understandable? but deodorant shopping is up there with jeans shopping in terms of 'difficult and unpleasant'#I'd say sea salt would also be a bonus but mostly as a joke #because I keep accidentally ending up with like soap and shampoo and conditioner with salt in them #I buy them because I think I won't react to the smell and that they will be effective #and then it turns out they also have salt in them #(I'm three salt issue diseases in a trench coat so it makes me laugh that the shampoo that works has sea salt in it)#(that said you do find scratches on your scalp the hard way when your shampoo and conditioner have both salt and lemon juice in them)#(like getting hand sanitizer in a paper cut lol)

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daz4i · 9 months ago

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yknow i noticed the small steps method doesn't help me and only stresses me out more. and like i just get stuck on the first step anyway and never move on to the next one, i'll probably even go back to the start eventually really. i'm apparently an all or nothing guy i can't think of an action as multiple actions bc it stresses me out i just need to either do it or not. the problem is i usually end up not

#i talked to my social worker abt this today #bc like he said that in order to have an easier time going outside i need to do it often enough to get used to it #but for me it's like. i go outside when i need to. yknow?#(days where my anxiety is painfully debilitating don't count lol)#i'm gonna be uncomfortable anyway. bc being outside is inherently unpleasant for me. it's not smth i can get used to #i compared this to going to the dentist. you do it bc you have to but you won't go just to get used to it yknow?#so my thought process is. i'm gonna have to start going outside every day soon for the art program. so i'm just gonna do it #i took a bus one time with my mentor/guide(??) to see that i can do it and i did. so i broke the barrier kinda #but it's not like i'm just gonna take the bus for fun?? i'll get used to it as i do it. i think. like i was before. hopefully #idk it feels pretty obvious to me but it baffled him i think 😭#both of them offered to just go downstairs with me. sit at the lobby of my building or smth #but it feels silly to me like. if i'm getting dressed i may as well go do smth yknow??#idk. again it makes a lot of sense to me but i don't think they get it #i think i'm generally very odd when it comes to other ppl in this recovery program 😭😭 just like i was in that social anxiety support group #(aka everyone went there for stage fright which isn't an issue for me i like being on a stage. hate one on one conversations tho -#- which was comfortable for them. so this was. well. the first step!!! in a lot of its sessions. and it just made me feel bad)#anyway that was my ramble. sorry. my brain is weird

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rawliverandgoronspice · 10 months ago

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my problem is, the more I tinker around with maddsen's backstory and flesh out the details of who he is (my oc version of the oot king of hyrule), and the more empathy I feel for this soggy little bitch.

not in the sense that I excuse his patheticness or the truly dreadful shit he does in its name, but this guy was just not psychologically meant to be king. this guy was meant to be a low-grade quality hobbit, and somebody (the golden goddesses???) was dumb enough to put a crown on his head and say "okay now you gotta handle the transition from civil war to peace time. go. also you're not allowed to cry in public about it anymore."

#thoughts #maddsen #oot #thralls of power #animatic project #him and ganondorf are on the opposite sides of the manchild spectrum to me #with maddsen actively self-babying because he can't handle anything in his (admittedly quite emotionally unpleasant) life #clinging to any entity he perceives more stable than him to save him from his own responsability and give him approval #(it's mostly impa AS IF SHE NEEDS THAT)#(also ganondorf because maddsen is this pathetic and feels both threatened and envious AND projects his own feelings on him)#(and like dude. no wonder everything constantly falls apart around you)#(this man is a father and commands armies we love to see it)#and ganondorf suffocating any visible hint of vulnerabilty from his childhood and being hostile to the notion he once was a little boy #while being utterly ruled by those feelings and leading to many a tantrum re: control abandonment betrayal loss of identity etc #both of these men are kings!!!!! hyrule is going to have such a great time you guysss

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reflectionsofgalaxies · 3 months ago

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gonna do the stupid thing for my stupid mental health

#is is the right thing? who knows #but camping made me realize that being away from some of this stuff made me feel a whole lot better #camping is great at bringing back some perspective #does this make me kinda a dick? maybe #but also this responsibility shouldn’t fall solely on me #i’m gonna focus on my friends who make me feel good #and school that makes me feel productive and excited #and everything else can make the effort if it needs my time and energy and emotional investment that badly #god camping was so wet but so good #MANY cool plants and mushrooms #i got to be in the forest info dumping to a captive audience #surrounded by my friends and without the outside world being able to contact me #legit definition of my happy place #lots of cool people to spend my time with #good games and campfire vibes and goofing off with glow sticks #didn’t get as many photos or snuggles as past camping trips but that was bc it was wet #let opportune moments for photo-ops and cuddling while damp is just unpleasant #so no hammock naps but that just gets bumped over to the bucket-list for next year again #and i only had ONE mild bad brain moment #and ONE (separate) bad body moment (and that one was my fault i had two hits of some really strong weed)#(and had a very very bad time for the rest of that night but NOT as bad as last year)#(I swear to god I learned my lesson this year)#so yeah. gonna make a camping bucket list for next year and look at it when i need reminders that there are good things ahead.#personal #(Em and Kat if u see this i love u both so much thank you for including me in your tradition these past several years)#(it means the world to me and i love getting to spend the time with you all!)

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exopelagic · 6 months ago

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I need to go to bed I’m just gonna shout a lil

#ice hockey needs to chill the fuck out #I had such a good night tonight!! was ssosososossososososo happy #but afterwards people started shouting in the group chat #and they all have very valid reasons for being angry but my god the us vs them mentality is STRONG #I am concerned abt how much people want to escalate things and how quickly they’re moving to do that #I am aware I am a doormat and a people pleaser or whatever but #I mean for one this is a tense political situation and we don’t wanna burn bridges #(there is no real politics i am being dramatic to be clear)#two clubs. alike in dignity. in fair Verona where we lay our scene #and I am personally managing at least 4 fragile egos that are all highly volatile #as well as an internal divide that’s threatening to cause problems very soon #I also should not be part of this anymore! and yet.#also why are specifically men who play team sports so dramatic when you get them all together #like that’s a whole shitstorm that is so easy to set off #anyway with my club I can’t blame the committee for being dramatic (different way to what I just said they’re not the same people)#bc I sure as fuck was overdramatic which fed into other people ramping up BUT that normally snapped me the fuck out of it #so I tempered the worst of it yknow. but I don’t think this new committee has that #/is not willing to listen to the person who would play that role #anyway if people don’t play nice it’s going to start some actual shit which will be deeply unpleasant for everyone #particularly the people who are in both clubs and do not deserve this bc they’ll be getting it from both sides and theyve done nothing wrong #anyway! bedtime now <3 I’m just frustrated bc the person who maybe would’ve calmed everyone down is out of commission #and I should not and am not willing to have the power to tell people to stop even though I probably still could #it’s whatever. sleep #luke.txt

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arahabakix · 2 years ago

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maturing is realising that while hidekane is the better ship, hide deserves so much more than kaneki and his half-assed attempts

#nagachika hideyoshi #hideyoshi nagachika #tokyo ghoul #draco.txt #hide did not indirectly say 'not to me. not if it's you' for kaneki to go ahead and do whatever he did #sometimes i feel like touken makes sense because they're both terribly selfish people trauma be damned #tg was one of my favourites but i'm quickly growing to dislike it because a) queer ppl are almost always the villains #b) traumatised ppl are almost always the villains #c) chap 125 was unnecessary and uncomfortable and unpleasant #aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa #drake shut up about tg challenge

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neige-leblanche · 8 months ago

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yeah sorry ive been doing kind of rough lately; i hope my gloomy vibes have not rubbed off on any of yall & i hope yall have been in sunny spirits lately☀️

#txt #the pharmacy ran out of my adhd meds as i've mentioned before #even now that its been a couple days i am struggling w my memory problems & dopamine issues #meaning stark deficiency of both :|#my parents also keep misgendering me which is just throwing me into bad moods that are harder to regulate or yknow solve constructively #im sorry for complaining. if you read all this. i hope my behavior hasnt been unpleasant to anyone here; no one here is at fault & i hope i #can be a positive presence here even when i'm feeling sad

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katyspersonal · 1 year ago

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#personal #current mood #those situations when you just /have/ to put up boundaries because your 'forgiving' and 'caring' only makes things worse for you both #i hate how much you can care about someone (or it can be mutual) but you just absolutely do not mix #and there are just so many things wrong #i hate hurting people i care about for the sake of 'lesser evil'#like how i needed to work on falling out of love because my jealousy and being told very unflattering things for why i could not-#-be loved back were making me toxic and unpleasant and kinda useless as a listener about /their/ crushes #only for them to feel crashed and abandoned because 'even you gave up on me'#i am absolute trash at 'tough love' stuff and being reasonable #but every other time being uncontrollably forgiving and loving causes more wrong than right #stuff like this #what if i don't want to put up boundaries? what if i don't want to be sober about where unhealthy bonds are leading me?#but i have to because in the end i am not even actually helping but only make things worse #by putting myself in conditions where i become toxic from mistreatment #and by keeping this person in conditions where they don't have to look for other sources of support and friends #but me being the sole person to rely on makes me strain under pressure and become unlikeable #which makes me either snap or distance for my own health and that hurts THAT person more #only i am a sucker enough to make things worse no matter what course of actions i choose #i mean of course there will be people in everyone's life who will regret having even met me #but this is just painful for so many reasons #it is not as simple as 'if they get upset that you put on boundaries they are not your friend'#some things people legit can't fix and i know that very well from experience #but there is 'managing' and there is 'nourishing unhealthy habits'#i can do the latter by literally just standing there (menacingly)#recently i've been thinking about how i just make everything i touch more crazy painful and chaotic (just like in my earlier dream)#and stuff like this is just another evidence of that..#when i analyse situations that could be passed as me making someone's life better i-#-start to realise that what i did do was just making things crazy and another person simply taking it well hahah #i am certainly some sort of alien. just like that person

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glittercorvid · 10 months ago

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been thinking about autistic pain tolerance and how many of my painful childhood memories could have been avoided if i'd just. understood the difference between Something Bad Happening and the ache of being alive.

#dan.txt #idk saw a poll about the most painful thing that's ever happened to you #and my top two stories both involved me going through something horrifically painful and not saying anything about it.#and it got me thinking about all the physical as well as psychological pain i just absorbed bc i didn't realize how bad it was #small everyday things like wearing socks and talking to my uncles were unpleasant but it was unacceptable to say so #unless it was so bad i physically couldn't hide my pain it was just discomfort right? and nobody's comfortable all the time #so of course when bad things happened and i was able to endure them without screaming or crying it meant they were just uncomfortable #and i wasn't such a pansy tattle tale that i'd rat over some discomfort #anyways. flames on the side of my face about this now but nothing to be done about the past

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