#but afterwards people started shouting in the group chat

[exopelagic]

I need to go to bed I’m just gonna shout a lil

[just1cefor4ll]

— 12 reasons why I wanted to leave, 1 reason why I stayed

Joost Klein x gn!reader

warning. ‼️heavy themes like suicide, abuse, alcoholism, death, bullying ect., swearing,not proof read ‼️

A/N. this is based on 13 reasons why and very slightly on anonymously yours. if you want to be added to the taglist for this fic then dm me, comment under this or ask in ‘requests’.

part 1 || part 2

Joost was getting ready to perform, chatting with his friends about how excited they were to go out afterward and finally have some time for themselves.

It was a night like any other—hundreds of fans packed into the venue with their phones out, or in some cases, holding up the most random devices Joost would definitely want footage from later. The stage lights were blinding, but the energy in the room was unlike any other, the kind of night that would be impossible to forget.

However one fan, in particular, stood out. They were right at the barricade, leaning against it, phone nowhere in sight. Unlike the rest of the crowd, they weren’t singing along, weren’t screaming—just watching him with quiet admiration. A few people around them threw curious glances, but they didn’t seem to care.

Joost, too caught up in the performance, didn’t notice them at first. But as the Europapa outro played, his gaze drifted over the crowd—and there they were. Their eyes met, and he stared, intrigued. He was used to fans buzzing with energy, shouting every lyric, but you? You were different.

Once the night ended, he saw you standing there as others made their way out— while you were just standing there in thought. You decided to leave a few minutes after, shoving through crowds and outside into the night. ‘How strange.’ Joost thought to himself but didn’t think too much about it, everyone enjoyed music in their own unique way and he wasn’t one to judge. And so he forgot about you— at least for a good while.

That night a letter had been delivered to him. He had an adress fans could send fan mail to and he loved recieving them. They always made his day and had a lot of the things he got somewhere on display or safely kept in a drawer he’d never throw away. But this letter.. it was strange.

In neatly written letters, the words ‘For Joost Klein, 13 reasons.’

13 reasons.. what could that possibly mean? He had re-read the 2 words about a hundred times before curiosity had gotten the best of him and ripped the envelope open.

—February 14th 2025

Joost,

I don’t know if you’ll actually read this. Maybe you’ll read the first few words, get a weird feeling in your gut, and throw it away. I wouldn’t blame you. It’s easier to ignore things that make us uncomfortable.

But in case you do read it, then I just want to let you know this letter is simply to let things out. I’ll stay anonymous, I don’t want you to find me but I want you to know my story. Why my story of all the hundreds others you could know? I’m not sure. Did anyone ever write this type of letter to you before?

Well to get to the point— here’s reason number 1. (You’ll figure out what I mean later.)

High school was pure hell to say the least. I mean, other than the typical grouping of people (You know, popular kids, nerds.. the weirdo’s..)

It started with rumors after I transferred from my old school because my dad wanted to live closer to family and get back into the city. The rumours were stupid— the kind that spread before you even realize they exist. I was a slut, apparently. A whore from the next town over. I lost count of how many people whispered about me, laughed behind my back, called me names to my face.

The worst part wasn’t the people saying it. It was the people who pretended not to hear. The friends who suddenly weren’t my friends anymore. The teachers who saw what was happening and did nothing.

I tried to ask for help. Once. I sat in an office, across from someone who was supposed to fix things, and I begged them to make it stop. They nodded, they smiled, they promised—then they sent me back to class like nothing had happened.

And this is gonna sound a bit weird— I mean I could care less you don’t know who I am— but that made the first crack in my soul. I was left broken to piece myself back together.

—Yours truly, anonymous.

The letter had kept him up all night—who could’ve known that one of his fans, someone who had stood in the same crowd as hundreds of others, carried something this heavy?

Joost read it over and over, each word digging deeper into his chest. What did you mean ‘you’ll find out later’? What did you mean reason one? Reason’s for what? The weight of it settled in his bones, making sleep impossible. He tried to brush it off, tell himself it wasn’t his problem, that he couldn’t save everyone. But the truth was, he wanted to know who had written it.

He thought back on any weird encounters he had— if he had seen anyone in his neighbourhood who was out of the ordinary but no— nothing came to mind.

And so he waited for the next letter. One day, two days.. a week. Nothing. Nothing came into the mail and he felt worried. Did something happen? Were you okay? He didn’t know you— only that you were deeply hurt and decided to entrust someone with your problems and you just disappeared. That was never good. Disappearing.. it was dangerous and he tried to watch out for any mentions of suicide on the news but surprisingly, 12 days after the first note, another one came. He opened it as fast as he could manage and sped through the letter, the way you expressed your hurt and sorrow.. it was unlike any other.

—February 26th 2025

Dear Joost,

It’s me again! Anonymous. I saw your show this weekend and it was quite the performance. It may seem stalker-ish but I’ve been going to almost every single concert you’ve had so far during this Europapa tour— I simply can’t get enough! :)

Well, to not bother you too much— although the content of this letter is heavy enough.. here’s reason number 2.

My mother died not long after I graduated.

It wasn’t sudden. It wasn’t some tragic accident. It was the kind of death that creeps up slowly, stretching itself out over months, maybe years, until one day you realize the person you love isn’t coming back. I remember watching her get weaker, how her voice got softer, how she started forgetting things—little things at first, then big things, like my name.

And then she was gone.

I was left with a father who didn’t know how to grieve and a house that felt like a tomb. People said all the usual things— “I’m so sorry for your loss, she’s in a better place, let me know if you need anything.” They said them like changed the fact that my world had just ended.

After my mother died, my father started drinking. A little at first. Then a lot. Then so much that I stopped recognizing the person sitting across from me at dinner.

He was angry all the time. At me, at himself, at the world. It didn’t take much to set him off. A wrong look. A wrong word. A wrong breath. And then it was yelling, slamming doors, broken glass.

I told myself it wasn’t that bad. That as long as I stayed quiet, as long as I stayed out of his way, I’d be fine.

I wasn’t.

I confronted him once. Told him I was tired of being scared in my own home. That I couldn’t keep pretending things were okay. That he wasn’t okay.

He just stared at me, silent. Then he got up and walked away.

A few nights later, I found him dead— he had taken his own life and left a letter about how sorry he was and how i’ll be better off without him. He rather kill himself than work on his issues and be there for his child. Was I that much of a failure to him? Was I not worth the struggle? Guess not.

I guess that’s why I’ve always related to you as a person and a fan. I know you lost your parents too. And even though I don’t know you, and you sure as hell don’t know me, it made me feel less alone. And I guess that pushed me to not give up, at least not so easily.

—Anonymous

This letter made him feel something different. Was it anger? Confusion? Maybe both. He had questions— a lot of them.. and so he decided to write back. You had be bringing the letters yourself, it didn’t have his address nor anything to indicate this was sent and delivered by a postman and so he hoped you’d find it the next time you’d come around.

He quickly scrambled to find a paper and pen, but as soon as he sat down to write something.. he couldn’t find the words.

What could he say that wasn’t said to you a thousand times already? ‘I’m sorry this is happening.’ ‘It will get better.’ No. Those would be empty promises he couldn’t actually keep.. and so he thought— though for hours until he just grabbed the pen and wrote until there was no more space on the white sheet of paper.

He was nervous to actually put it in his mailbox. What if you stopped writing? He was probably your only hope and so he couldn’t afford to mess this up. The time ticked by and soon the clock strikes midnight, and the time came for him to finally put it into the mailbox where you’d hopefully find it and take the advice and things he had to say to heart.. or at least thought about them. He hoped for the best, for your well being even though he didn’t know you a single bit— how could he wish you anything else? You poured your heart out to him, you chose to do so and he felt some sort of pride in his chest bubble up because it was like he had succeeded in something. Something big. He hoped you thought so too.

—February 26th 2025

Dear anonymous,

I hope you’re doing okay

How have you been?

As you can probably tell, I’m struggling to find the right words to start this letter— but I guess this is the best I’ll do.

There hasn’t been a single night where I haven’t thought about you. About whether you’re still here. About how much of this weight you’re still carrying. I don’t know if you expect me to respond, if you even want me to, but I have to. Because I can’t read what you wrote and just pretend it’s nothing.

I keep thinking about that. About the fact that, despite everything, you’re still here. That after all the shit life has thrown at you—every loss, every time you were kicked down and left to pick up the pieces alone, every night you spent staring at the ceiling wondering if it was even worth it—you’re still breathing.

I don’t know who you are, but I know you’ve been hurting for a long time. I know you’ve been carrying this alone, and I know how heavy that gets. I know what it’s like to walk around with so much pain inside you that it feels like it’s carved into your ribs. Like no matter what you do, no matter how much time passes, it’s always there. And the worst part? The fact that no one ever really sees it.

People look at you and see whatever version of you they want. They see the person who keeps showing up, who keeps moving forward, and they assume that means you’re okay. That you must be fine because you haven’t completely fallen apart. They don’t see the exhaustion in your bones. They don’t see the nights where it physically hurts to be alive. They don’t see how goddamn hard it is just to exist some days.

And after a while, you start to believe it too. That maybe this is just how it is. That maybe you’re just meant to carry this alone, because no one’s ever really noticed enough to do anything else.

But I notice. I notice because I’ve been there. Because I know what it’s like to be drowning and have the world keep moving like nothing’s wrong. I know what it’s like to lose people and realize too late that you were never ready to live without them. I know what it’s like to be so goddamn tired of everything—of the weight, of the silence, of the pretending—that giving up starts to feel like the only option that makes sense.

But you haven’t.

I’m not going to give you some empty speech about how things get better. I’m not going to sit here and tell you that everything happens for a reason, or that the pain you’ve felt will magically fade. That would be bullshit. We both know it doesn’t work that way.

You are not alone in this. Not anymore. Because I see you. And I’m here.

—Yours truly, Joost. :)

You couldn’t stop the tears from slipping down your face, no matter how hard you tried to hold them back. The way he put everything into words—your feelings, your pain—it was almost terrifying. It was like, for a moment, he had stepped inside your mind, like he had lived through every dark thought, every lonely night, every moment where you felt like there was nothing left.

It was almost as if, just for a little while, you had switched places. As if he had carried your pain for you, held it in his hands and understood it in a way no one else ever had. And then, just as quickly, you were yanked back into your own reality, into this life that felt more like a prison than anything else.

You gripped the paper tightly, reading over his words again and again, as if searching for some hidden meaning, something that might make this feel less real. But it was real. He had written this. He had seen you, even without knowing your name, without ever meeting you.

And that terrified you.

He understood— someone who was never in your same exact shoes before understood.. you weren’t invisible anymore, not to Joost at least. Maybe you weren’t as alone as you had convinced yourself you were.

And maybe—just maybe—there was still a reason to keep going.

© just1cefor4all— I don’t consent to my writing being reposted to other platforms or fed into AI. Translating it is also strictly prohibited. 🚫

[desideriumwriter]

Anyone But You | Chapter 8

Chapter Summary - Reader makes friends, witnesses the twins failed attempt of putting their names in the goblet, and ends up in a pantry with Fred.

Pairing - Fred Weasley x Fem!Gryffindor!Reader

Category - enemies to lovers

Word Count - 2.0k

Series Masterlist | F.W Masterlist | Previous | Next | Navi

The days had been going by quickly into your sixth year. The cold fall weather had snuck in and things were going smoother than you expected. 

You’d become good friends with Katie and Angelina (though you wanted to gag whenever she started talking about the twins,), Cedric wasn’t constantly ditching you to chase after Cho, and that bloody cast on your arm was finally gone.

Yesterday the other schools had arrived before the Welcoming Feast. All the boys had their eyes locked on the blue uniformed Beauxbatons girls, while the girls swooned over the Durmstrang boys.

It was Halloween on a Saturday, you would’ve been sleeping in late, but you and Katie promised to go with Angelina to put her name in the Goblet. 

There were already a good amount of people wandering around the Great Hall by the time you got down there, some eating breakfast and some chatting. Katie and you stood back as Angelina dropped her name in, giving her little cheers and applauds as she grinned.

Afterwards, you all went up to the end of the table where most were sitting. Katie asked if anyone had put their names in yet.

“Apparently most of the Durmstrang boys, I’ve only seen one person from here do it, and it was some bloke from Slytherin.” Dean told the table, getting reactions of disgust.

“Well, Angelina just put her name in!” You added in. Everyone turned to look at the chaser.

“Really?” Ron said, an impressed look on his face. 

“Mhm!” Angelina gave a nervous smile, “I just turned seventeen last week.” The group cheered and swiveled in their seats.

"I'm so glad someone from Gryffindor's entering," Hermione looked up, "I really hope you get it, Angelina!" She gave a genuine smile.

Laughter emerged from the entrance of the hall. You turned to see the twins running in, each of them holding up a small potion.

“We’ve done it!” George exclaimed.

“Cooked it up just now!” Fred added on.

“A aging potion!-“

“Just to get us a few months older!”

They high fived students in the crowd that was beginning to assemble around them. Cheering and praising the ginger boys.

They hopped up onto a wooden bench together, shaking up their potions and linked arms.

“Ready Fred?”

“Ready George!” 

“Bottoms up!” They said in unison, popping the corks off the small glass tubes and knocking the liquid back into their mouths.

The room was silent as the boys jumped over the line. You were shocked that it actually worked, so was Hermione, and everyone else in the room. There was a few seconds of complete silence before applause started.

It was silent again as everyone watched them take their pieces of parchment out, carefully dropping them into the blue flames. The room began to cheer and applaud, the twins high fived each other, letting out yells of triumph until it was turned to yells of fear once they were suddenly catapulted away from the Goblet.

They both flew right over the crowd surrounding them and landed ten feet away onto the stone floor. They groaned in pain as they sat up. 

Long white hair and beards sprouted from their faces, they both touched their heads and looked at each other in shock.

“You said!” Fred began.

“You said!” George pointed at his brother, then tackled him, knocking him back down to the ground.

“Yeah, you want a piece of me?” George shouted as they began to roll around wrestling on the floor.

This immediately got another crowd around them, kids began to laugh and chant for them to fight.

“Get off! Or I’ll tear your ears off!” Fred grunted.

You couldn’t hold in your laughter at their childishness and continuous insults being thrown at each other. Eventually, you joined in on the chanting encouraging them to continue on fighting.

⋆⋆⋆

“Dragons?” You retorted a bit too loudly. Cedric's eyes went wide like yours, shushing you.

The both of you weren’t supposed to be outside your common rooms. It was nearing midnight and you would’ve never come out this late, but Cedric had sent you an owl, his message looked frantically scribbled down.

Now you stood with him in the kitchen corridors, right outside the Hufflepuff common room entrance.

“Yeah. They’ve got one for each person.”

“What? I don’t- How do you know? They said they wouldn’t tell what the first task was?” You stammered.

“Harry told me, he saw them. The task is to get past them somehow. That’s all I know.” Cedric sighed, running a hair through his hair.

“Cedric, the first task is tomorrow evening!” He shushed you again when your voice echoed throughout the empty corridor. You muttered a small apology and then rubbed your face with your hands.

“Can’t you back out?” They can’t force you to go through with this, right?” You already knew the answer, there was no turning back once your name was chosen, but you didn’t like the idea of your bestfriend going head to head with a dragon.

“What?” He breathed out, “I’m not going to quit! Do you realize how’d that make me look when half of the school is rooting for me?”

“It’d save your life!” You remarked, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I’d look like a coward!” He gawked out. “Listen, I’m sure there will be…precautions so no serious harm is done.” He regained his composure and sighed once again. “Surely they’ll let us use magic, they didn’t weigh our wands for nothing.

“Yeah, but I really don’t like this…” You muttered, staring at your slippers. “It’s dangerous and..what if something goes wrong?” You said hastily, Cedric put a hand on your shoulder, getting you to bring your eyes back to his.

“I’ll be fine, now you go get back to your dorm before Filch comes around.” He let out a breathy laugh, patting you on the shoulder. “Get some sleep, alright?”

“You too, big day tomorrow.” You smiled, both turning to get back to your dorms.

You were quiet as you snuck through the kitchen corridor, casting lumos and using your wand as a dim flashlight. You continued to replay the conversation in your head, you didn’t understand how Cedric could be so calm about it.

“Dragons..” You mumbled to yourself, shuddering at the thought of being face to face with one.

“Sounds like nasty business.” A muffled voice came from the side of you, you pointed your wand to see him sitting on one of the tables, a small plate of scones sat next to him, a half eaten one in his hand.

You let out more of a sigh than a breath of relief at the sight of him. Why is he everywhere?

“The beard’s gone.” You mindlessly stated, looking at his bare face. This is the first time you’ve seen him since he got sent to the hospital wing for a little while after his potion backfired.

“Yep, I've been shaved clean.” Fred said as he took a bite of the scone, “Decided to get myself a celebratory midnight snack.” He raised it up in the air proudly. “Take one for yourself!” He said, picking one off the plate and tossing it to you. Instead of being able to catch it, the pastry hit a very messy and unsteady stack of metal bowls on the counter behind you, causing them to come crashing down.

This just caused a domino effect of bowls falling all over the counter and onto the floor, knocking some plates down as well and causing them to shatter on the floor. The array of loud noises made your eyes flutter with each bang and boom.

Once the 10 second lasting chaos was over, you covered your mouth with both of your hands in shock, turning to Fred with wide eyes. His jaw had dropped too, but you could see the way the ends of his mouth began to curve upwards, this only boiled your blood. 

You were going to tell him off for being the most childish, reckless, dumbass boy you’ve ever-

“Who’s there?” The raspy voice of Filch called out from further down, your head whipped to the direction you could hear the quick patter of footsteps coming towards you.

Soon enough Fred’s hands were grabbing onto your arms, pulling you into a pantry, saying a quick spell that restacked all the bowls and fixed the broken plates, then shut the door. 

The pantry was incredibly small. Fred and you stood facing towards each other, you could still see very faintly his face in dark space, your chests were nearly touching as the both of you breathed heavily. It felt strange, it wasn’t a bad strange. It was just…strange.

“Your cast's gone.” He whispered, his hand was still holding yours. You weren’t holding his, nor were you paying attention to what he was saying, too focused on the thought of getting caught by Filch.

His hold on your hand was loose, it was gentle. He rubbed his thumb back and forth over the back of your hand, he did it so smoothly, so sweetly, it felt almost soothing. But, you’d never admit that.

“You’ve got really soft skin.” He thought out loud, it took you a second to actually realize what he just said.

“What?” You stared at him, a door slammed open in the kitchen before Fred could say anything, he just put a finger over his lips, signaling you to shush.

You both waited and watched as a small slit of warm light passed through the doors cracks. Filch muttered something about ghosts then left, listening as the old lantern he always carried swung as he walked off.

You let out a breath of relief once any sign of him was gone. 

“I’m always saving you from some trouble.” Fred broke the silence, you hated how you could still see that cocky grin on his face. 

“You’re always getting me in it.” You seethed, ripping your hand out of his grasp and pushing out the door. Fred followed.

“How is it my fault? I’m not the reason you’re down here in the first place.”

True. But if he was able to not be the loudest and cause messes everywhere he went maybe you would’ve never been nearly caught.

“What’d you come down here for anyways?” Fred questioned as he leaned against the wooden table he was originally on. You were a bit hesitant to answer, hoping you wouldn’t make anything look suspicious between Cedric and you.

“Cedric needed to talk to me.” You shrugged, not missing how Fred's face twisted at Cedric being mentioned. You narrowed your eyes at his reaction.

“Oh come on, he’s not all that bad. You’re just still sour about losing to him in last year's match.” You let out an amused laugh, you were just teasing him, giving him a taste of his own medicine. But when Fred scoffed and crossed his arms over his chest, it seemed as if he was still hung up on that.

Was he really?

“You’re not…” You began to grin in disbelief, “You’re still mad about that?” Fred tried to mutter out a ‘no’ in response but you just chuckled at it.

“He offered a rematch! Practically begged for one! You know that!” You gawked at him, you knew Fred wasn’t actually upset at Cedric, he was upset that Gryffindor lost cause Cedric grabbed the snitch that time.

“Yeah I know…whatever, what’s little loverboy Cedric got you down here at this time of night for?” You rolled your eyes at the nickname.

“None of your business.” You copied his pose, crossing your arms over your chest.

“Was he telling you about the dragons?” He smirked, your face dropped, now looking at him in shock.

“How did you…” You trailed off, he did hear you mumbling originally, maybe he just connected the dots. Maybe he was listening in on your conversation with Cedric. Maybe-

“You’re not very good at whispering.” He said with a blank face. You closed your eyes and let out a heavy breath, drowning in embarrassment.

“Don’t be so hard on yourself. I’ve known for weeks.” Your eyes shot open, you looked straight at him. Fred already knew what you were about to ask, your baffled expression already said enough.

“How?”

“You think they can bring giant fire breathing creatures here and expect George and me not to find out? Especially when they had my older brother bring them here?”

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[greetingfromthedead]

21. The Caravaners

Series: Apple Blossoms Pairing: Knives x GN!Reader Word count: 3.2k This chapter has been beta-read by kn1vesm

Author's Note: I am happy to be back and posting Apple Blossoms again! This set of chapters is very special to me and I can't wait to have them all out for you to read! And if you want to join a fun little group chat to have the latest news about this series and talk crazy (about any topic) with other goons, join our Discord community.

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The longer you stare at the faintly lit structure in the distance, the clearer it becomes. Your heart swells again with hope, your stomach taken over with anxiety. The storm of emotions paralyzes you for a moment, so great is the relief of finally seeing a caravan. Nothing says they are carrying medical supplies, but they are a sign that goods are starting to move again. For a moment, you even forget about the distress signal that still flashes in your general direction; all you can think about is the possibility of your worries being over.

Finally, you lower yourself onto your saddle again and push your tomas forward. Your bird carefully makes its way down the dune, and you can faintly hear Knives following behind. Before you reach the caravan, a flashlight floods you with blinding light, and shouts reach your ears. It is a rush of voices and commotion; words of concern slip over your lips, and soon enough you are in the midst of four people, all talking at once.

Once your mind catches up, you start to piece together the situation. The car pulling the caravan broke down during the day and won't start again; the battery is full, and nobody can figure out the reason behind this issue. That's what one of the younger men tells you once you ask what happened. The eldest man doesn't seem too happy with everyone flocking so eagerly around you; he keeps grumbling comments that make it clear he is weary of bandits and other lowlives. The only woman among them is relieved to see you and assures that nobody is injured and that their food and drink supply has not failed them yet. She puts your heart at ease, and afterwards she apologizes for her husband's mistrustful nature. The fourth person is another young man who details everything he has already tried in order to fix the car. You aren't sure how long the conversation takes; you aren't even sure if any greetings were spoken. The caravan people are glad to have caught the eye of someone who doesn't seem to have any ill intent, and you are still like on a cloud, happy to see a caravan and eager to find out what they carry. Not a single phrase or name sticks with you, but by the end of it, you are all on the same page.

"I'm glad nobody is sick or injured!" You smile at them. "But then again, I'm afraid my knowledge only applies to doctoring people and not machines."

"It was a long shot anyway; flagging down a mechanic would have been great, but since you are on toma, you could at least make it to the next settlement with less trouble and perhaps send someone our way," one of the young men speaks kindly, seemingly starting to calm down again and settle into a slower and steadier tone of voice.

"Not sure there are any decent mechanics around, but we can certainly try to get you help. The next settlement isn't too far away. Is that where you came from?" You nod, starting to feel better now that a plan is beginning to form.

"Yes, we left in the morning and broke down somewhere in the late afternoon," the other young man fills you in. "By bird, it shouldn't take longer than a day. We can hold on, no problem, if you would be so kind as to head there in the morning. As long as no worms eat us or bandits come to be a bother, we have the resources to be stranded for at least a few days."

"You came from Grantsmon, right?" You double-check that your knowledge doesn't fail you.

"Yes, spent the night there after driving for two days straight from Octovern," the same man continues, "Boy, oh, boy, is that quite a place nowadays."

"Hey now, perhaps we should get settled? I'm sure our new friends have also had a long day. It is silly for us to just stand around here," the woman speaks up just as you were preparing to ask about the city.

You are led to the other side of the caravan, where the wind is less harsh. They have set up a tent there; it is large enough to act as a shop for their wares but currently houses four spots for sleeping. You follow the caravan people inside after tying up the toma. You keep glancing towards Knives, but he avoids looking at you, or perhaps the hood hides him from your sight by accident. This should be okay. Even if they recognize him, they are stranded and can't haul him off. But what if they take your toma? The bounty is enough to be worth abandoning their wares. Anxiety starts to creep back into your gut.

"We have enough space for everyone. You can set up your own sleeping spots. What we lack in privacy, we make up with protection from the pesky sand," the woman speaks as she pulls the already set-up bedrolls closer together. "Are you hungry? We saw your light; you must have been making dinner. We have enough to offer you some of our supplies too."

You thank her for her hospitality, but you still feel uneasy. The men glance towards Knives, who brings in your bedrolls, his face still hidden by the hood. You realize he might look even more suspicious like this. Uncertainty pulls you apart. If only you could trust people, if only you could keep everybody safe.

"So what wares do you peddle?" you finally ask, trying to draw their attention onto yourself as you help Knives set up the two sleeping spots next to each other.

"Mostly clothes and some other essentials. Food, water, some tech," one of the young men replies with a shrug.

"Do you happen to carry medical supplies?" you ask, hoping to hear a positive answer.

"Sorry, we unfortunately don't. I gather you are a doctor?" The same man crushes your hopes.

"Yeah, I have been looking for traders who could bolster my equipment. I was already low and left most of what I had with some people who needed them more." You wonder how Jenny is doing and how the people you treated are. They probably expect you back soon, yet you are still empty-handed.

"You don't happen to be talking about Silvercrest?" The woman asks and makes you raise your gaze, fingers still gripping the thin sleeping bag you were laying out.

"Yes. Do you happen to have any news?" You perk up further.

"Not really, I just know an emergency package and a doctor amongst the newcomers were sent out in a hurry," the woman replies apologetically.

"Yeah, we heard about it from the other caravan who was getting their own supplies at that time," a young man mentions.

"There are more of you?"

"Oh yes, we caravaners were stuck near Octovern for a while so they could get their productions up. Some we knew from a while ago; for others, it was the first time. A group of us set off at the same time, heading for Grantsmon. We split up only now. They headed for the northern trade routes; we took the western one." You can barely tell who is talking; your mind is already running rampant with the shards of information given.

"So someone is carrying medical supplies among the other caravans?" You ask for clarity on what you already suspect.

"Yes, quite a lot of it too. They're heading for the remaining towns that still might have doctors. They all headed towards New Pernvil, to my knowledge," one of the young men replies, and you finally sit down on your mat, taking a moment to let the good news sink in.

You have hope again that you don't have to head to October. You have confirmation that caravans are moving again, and they carry what you need. You smile, relieved that your journey may not be as difficult as you once feared. You don't mean to glance over towards Knives. And you for sure don't mean to smile at him. But there you are anyway, meeting his gaze and feeling a warm flutter in your chest. His eyes are wide, his black hair messy from the hood that has slipped from his head. He doesn't turn away from you; instead, something akin to a slight glimmer appears in his eyes, as if he is relieved too.

A map draws itself up in your mind; you try to picture a route that would help everyone, but you quickly run into a problem. These people here need the help of a mechanic as soon as possible. The closest town is Grantsmon, but if the other caravans have already moved north, you will lose at least a day of travel time trying to catch up with them. Probably even more. If you could head straight towards New Pernvil, you might meet up with them in just four days, considering that the caravans most likely aren't moving too much faster compared to your toma despite being cars.

"You okay?" the woman asks as she reaches out a bowl of soup to you.

"Yes, I'm fine," you smile, not wanting to reveal that you had the small, fleeting thought of leaving them stranded for longer than needed by heading north in the morning. You can't do that to these people.

"Man, I am glad we found someone in the desert! What luck! I was not looking forward to the possibility of walking all the way back again!" One of the younger men settles into his bed, resting his head on his hands.

"Well, our new friends haven't agreed to anything yet. We can discuss it tomorrow morning and come up with a plan together. Let's rest for now," the woman smiles at the other men who don't seem to be very interested in Knives anymore, who hasn't spoken a single word all this time. They must be used to all kinds of people.

"Right! I am beat!" the other young man announces, stretching his arms above his head.

After this, everything settles—the young men soon are fast asleep, the woman puts away the little burner she used as a light source, and while her husband still seems a bit unhappy, you don't get the feeling that he is hostile, not towards you nor Knives. Perhaps they don't recognize him. Maybe they don't care. Whatever the case, the anxiety within you calms just enough for you to feel tired too. For a while, you fight it. You try to remain alert, especially when Knives gets into his bed beside you, his wide back towards you. Maybe this is what the caravan people were waiting for. Maybe this is the golden opportunity for them to strike. But the long day claims you before you can worry about it for too long, and soon you are fast asleep.

When you finally wake, you feel dry as a bone. Your mouth, nose, and eyes all feel parched. Your body is heavy and tired. You can tell you have slept for a long time; the suns did not wake you this morning since you were hidden away by the tent's canopy.

"Here," you hear a woman's voice, and as you force your eyes open, you see the outstretched canteen.

The warm water still feels refreshing, allowing you to gather your wits and properly wake up.

"Good morning," the woman speaks softly while smiling, "You must have been tired."

"How embarrassing," you mutter while clutching the canteen, "I'm sorry for being so rude."

"It's okay; you have nothing to worry about."

"But we were supposed to head out early to go get you help," you remember, feeling guilty for causing a delay.

"I've got a feeling you don't need to go get anyone, dear."

You wonder about the woman's words for a moment before starting to hear male voices from outside. A quick look around confirms your fear—Knives is gone. Your stomach drops. For a brief moment, your brain turns all the voices into a violent struggle. Before you can jump up from your spot, you realize there is no malice at all in those voices, and suddenly they get interrupted by the sound of a car engine. You slowly get up to go and investigate just as the sound dies down again.

Pushing aside the cloth door reveals the brilliant weather outside. The sunlight blinds you for a moment, but quickly you start to make out shapes again and realize all the men have congregated around the car. Including Knives. He stands in front of the open hood and wipes away the loose hair from his brow that gets in his eyes as he focuses his efforts back onto whatever is before him. Knives wears a different shirt, one that is stained with grease and dirt from working on the car. It barely fits him; the fabric is pulled tight around his chest, and the sleeves are rolled up, revealing his muscular arms that still carry a few scars from his injuries. The others are chatting around him; one of the younger men sits in the driver's seat, halfway hanging out the window to try and see what is happening. The other youngster stands beside Knives, and both of them seem to bombard the raven-haired man with questions he has no intention of answering. Your companion simply stares straight ahead with a stoic expression as he works on the car. You are reminded how he helped the family with their water purification system. He is handier than he lets on, and it is surprising that he reaches out a helping hand at all, considering his usual cold demeanor. You see the slightest hint of strain on his face as he pulls on something and then lets out a sigh of relief.

"Try it now," Knives's smooth voice speaks out as he steps back.

The man in the car quickly settles into the seat to turn the key, and after a few labored whines of the engine, it starts. The men around Knives celebrate and pat him on the back, but his eyes turn to you. His expression is strange, somehow so distant. He doesn't show any joy or excitement, a drastic difference from the scene around him. His gaze seems peculiar; it almost makes you feel as if he wants to tell you something, but on the other hand, he appears as cold as usual.

As you step closer, he averts his eyes, talking to the man beside him and pointing at something under the hood. His voice is low, and his sentences are brief. Reaching the congregation, you get ignored by everyone there. The men are still celebrating, talking over each other, claiming to have known the cause from the beginning, and Knives simply takes a rag and cleans his hands while walking away without giving you a second look.

Despite being used to Knives's coldness, seeing him just turn away without a word leaves a bitter taste in your mouth. You don't understand him or his motivations, not for the things he does nor when he acts the way he does. You know there is a more candid version of him; you have seen it yourself. You have seen his gentle eyes. You have cupped his blushing cheek. You know that there is a vulnerability within him waiting to be revealed if only he would trust you enough to stop pretending. You want it, perhaps more than you should. You want him to like you.

"This is fantastic!" the cheerful man beside you exclaims, patting you on the back, "We don't even have to wait for a mechanic!"

"Yeah, I wonder why he didn't say anything yesterday. Strange fellow, but I am glad he could help us out of this pickle," the older man speaks calmly, his low voice reverberating in your bones.

"I certainly thought him strange! I just found him under the hood in the morning! I thought he might take off with our battery or something, but apparently he just couldn't sleep!" The man inside the car pipes up. "He studied it all for quite some time before even asking for any tools; lucky for us, I had them all on hand!"

The chatter continues, but you are unable to respond. You have nothing to say, and your mind is overtaken by the way Knives walked away. You spot the shirt he must have worn before the borrowed one, and you pick it up, heading back towards the tent since you left in such a hurry that your pillow and sleeping bag remained thrown about. You turn the fabric in your hand as you walk back. You don't notice the curtain doors moving; you don't raise your eyes from the faded color, so you can't stop yourself in time and walk into Knives, who just exited the tent. You bounce off his chest, your head quickly snapping back, and the inertia is enough to make you lose balance, toppling you backward. Just before you lose your legs, Knives's hand grabs your forearm, his long fingers securely wrapping around to pull you back into balance, perhaps a little too quickly, a little too recklessly, since you end up stumbling forward instead, grabbing hold of his shirt as you crash back into him.

Even as it becomes clear that you are not going to fall over, Knives's hand doesn't release you, instead holding on, holding you close. Slowly you raise your chin, looking up into his surprised face. You caught him before he could school his features into indifference, his eyes wide, a pinkish shadow flushed over his cheeks. You feel his chest shift under your hand as he draws in a breath, a little later than he should have. As if he held it until now.

"You'll get dirty," is all Knives mumbles, his face settling into a more neutral expression as he lets go of your arm.

You are still left speechless, too flustered to say anything, too taken in by the expression he donned. He shifts away from your touch and sidesteps you, his gaze lingering on you until he can no longer see you from the corner of his eye. You still feel his handprint on your arm; it tingles slightly, and you cover it with your own to soothe the goosebumps. You turn your gaze on Knives's back, who once again walks away from you, the hand that grabbed hold of you brushing its palm against his pants as if you were the one dirtying him.

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[foxes-that-run]

Daily mirror - 3am:

Harry is the one for my star pal (5 April 2012)

Bieber re­veals: “I al­ready know one of the big­gest artists in the world thinks Harry is so hot, but I have been sworn to se­crecy.”

Fancy a Swift one? (11 April 2012)

"Taylor went backstage and was hanging around by the group's dressing room, and said a quick 'hello' to the guys.” "She started dramatically fanning herself afterwards, making out like she was overwhelmed, which got everyone laughing.” “She really likes Harry but made Justin promise not to go on the record about it." Oooops.

Harry is the One for my star pal

Justin lifts lid on secret admirer

Moodie, Clemmie; Tetteh, The Daily Mirror; London (UK). 5 Apr 2012

THERE used to be only one di­rec­tion pre- pubescent girls were head­ing in... and that was Justin Bieber’s.

But now hy­per­ven­ti­lat­ing teenage Amer­i­cans flock in­stead to the Brits from One Di­rec­tion – and Harry Styles in par­tic­u­lar.

And, ac­cord­ing to Justin, 17- year- old Harry ap­peals to su­per­stars as well as the or­di­nary girl on the street

Bieber re­veals: “I al­ready know one of the big­gest artists in the world thinks Harry is so hot, but I have been sworn to se­crecy.”

Mmm, Madonna’s a pal of the Bieb and she likes a toy­boy. Per­haps the 94 53- year- old Queen Mother of Pop fan­cies a change of Styles?

Justin – now a griz­zled veteran of the US show­biz scene at the grand old age of 18 – went on: “The sin­gle guys from One Di­rec­tion are go­ing to have a lot of fun. They look great, they sound great and, when you add their Bri­tish ac­cents into the mix, the Amer­i­can girls are go­ing crazy for them. Sure you need the tal­ent, but you need to win over the Amer­i­can public, that’s what it is all about. One Di­rec­tion are gen­uine good guys. The in­dus­try needs a fresh boy band, and by the end of this year they will be the big­gest boy band in the world.” Justin, of course, isn isn’t short be of fans him­self. He sold 521,000 downloads of his new sin­gle Boyfriend in its de­but week.

One Di­rec­tion should try and per­suade Justin to come on board and join them – then they’d go on to con­quer the en­tire uni­verse.

TAYLOR WANTS TO SEE EVEN MORE OF HARRY

Moodie, Clemmie; Tetteh, The Daily Mirror; London (UK). 11 Apr 2012

IT'S been the question on One Directioners' lips across the planet.

Now, one week after Justin Bieber let slip "one of the world's biggest artists" fancies Harry Styles, I can reveal the identity of said mystery woman.

*Drum roll*...step forward, country star Taylor Swift.

The six-time Grammy winner (right) has been lusting over the cherub-faced one, desperately trying to bag herself a date.

And, darnit, had she been Down Under this week, she would have got a eyeful of Harry and his bandmates as they let it all hang out in Sydney Harbour.

Singer Taylor, 22, who was recently awarded a philanthropic gong by First Lady Michelle Obama, spent 15 minutes at last month's Nickelodeon awards plotting an introduction c/o the Canadian foetus.

Says my backstage mole: "Taylor is a huge One Direction fan and was excitedly bopping along to the boys when they performed on stage. Then she was chatting to Justin and told him how hot she found Harry. Justin was joking about trying to keep his own girlfriend, Selena Gomez, away from the band because she, too, loves them.

"Taylor went backstage and was hanging around by the group's dressing room, and said a quick 'hello' to the guys.

"She started dramatically fanning herself afterwards, making out like she was overwhelmed, which got everyone laughing.

"She really likes Harry but made Justin promise not to go on the record about it." Oooops.

And it seems the Love Story star may be in with a shout as the 18-year-old heart-throb is already following her on Twitter.

And he has namechecked the statuesque starlet. Chatting about the group's performance at the Nickelodeon awards, Harry said: "I feel good. I think the people who were getting involved are all great performers, so for them to enjoy our performance was nice. Katy Perry was there and Selena Gomez. There was Ashley Tisdale.

"Taylor Swift was dancing as well..."

Contrary to internet rumours, Harry is NOT dating US singer Lily Halpern after his split from Xtra Factor host Caroline Flack.

In fact, it looked like he didn't have a care in the world as he joined bandmates Louis Tomlinson, Niall Horan, Liam Payne and Zayn Malik for a four-hour bask aboard a swanky yacht in Sydney Harbour.

The boys, who kick of their Aussie tour on Friday, didn't need any encouragement to show off their torsos...apart from a pasty Niall, who tweeted he wasn't tanned enough to de-sheath. Harry even appears to have bulked up a touch, revealing a none too-shoddy set of obliques. Thus making Taylor Swift's week.

[mitamicah]

Gig repport: Restaurant Backas, Vantaa July 3 2024

Here follows my experiences with Käärijä (and HUGO) at Restaurant Backas, Vantaa on July 3 2024.

It was also the day of the (main part of) kääryle summer camp organized by @bisonaari - thank you so much for a great event <33

Given I couldn’t sleep and lived only 10 minutes on foot from the venue I went there early to hang out with the queue. The queueing was very laid back – gave me the biggest Joker Out in Malmö vibes (big compliment btw since that is my favourite Joker Out gig I’ve been to so far). @j-restlessgeek joined the queue at 9 and @jaarijani at 12; the three of us then headed to the Käärijä mural to meet up with the rest of the summer camp, take group pictures and go to the local library for a “picnic” (it was raining). The picnic was peak coziness with trying out snacks from everybody’s homecountries, writing in each other’s fanzines/books/clothes. It was amazing meeting old friends (like @carpblu and @formulalakana – the Berlin trio back together <3) and great folks I have not been able to meet irl yet like @tuherrus and @icbimakb.  

My low number in the queue gave me my first real barricade spot at a käärijä concert, although I felt a bit bad at times running away from the spot to talk with other fans and to chat with Häärijä, Tiia and Jesse asking them to write on my shirt (wore a big white tee asking people to write stupid stuff on it). The first thing I noticed when meeting häärijä was him having the @kaarijazineofficial in his hand, so I blurted out: “OMG YOU HAVE THE ZINE!!! I DREW YOU!” which earned me a smile from the boy.

Me and Häärijä:

After two hours of bonding the first of two artists went on stage; HUGO and his band. I didn’t know his music but I vibed.

Inbetween HUGO’s set and Käärijä we were given chips by the security (which I’ve never experienced before at a concert) and we were sharing snacks we’d been allowed inside even with the ‘no food’ rule set by the venue.

Jesse arrived and did his little show taping down the setlist, and Skull managed to glance Paidaton Riehuja on the set. Then we saw Mikke and his gf/wife and child arrive where I turned into the annoying fan looking at Mikke and then pointing at a sticker for him to come and get it.  At the end he shook his head, light heartedly called me crazy and grabbed the sticker.

In my opinion this set turned into the best Käärijä one I’ve witnessed yet: he played all the big hits (Huhhahhei, Rouska, Viulunkeili, Välikoulema, Kot Kot, Cha Cha Cha) but also some deeper cuts (Paidaton Riehuja, Klo 23) and doing it all being the biggest sunshine and yapping very humbly about his experiences growing up in Vantaa among other things thanking a PE teacher from 6th grade for believing in him and also later jokingly saying a nearby seagull flying close to the stage was lucky to get a free concert. Jere even shouted me out twice first noticing my Danish flag and that my hair was cut like “his old hair”, and the second time calling me “Denmark Guy” when pointing out my Bulbasaur cap. The second time I didn’t know what to even say so I started “Are You”ing him, which he responded to (!!!) before seemingly starting daydreaming for a second before asking the crowd who’d go to Ruisrock (subtle).

After the show I stayed around determined to get the setlist using my somewhat-tall privilege to get it. Me and Cass fanboyed over seeing a truck with the licence plate ‘TRAFFIC’ on it at the bottom of the page (this together with Häärijä writing ‘Häärijä Hojan Hoost’ on my shirt made us very sus). While walking around giving my last stickers away I met with my fellow dane @solsortemor that gave me a lovely custom bracelet and showed me the video she’d taken of one of the banters I’d gotten with Käärijä. She’d later drive me back to the Airbnb so I could get her the bracelet I’d made for her. Being curious however I went back to Backas afterwards to see if the crowd in front of the gate was still there (they weren’t so I figured neither was Jere). Then I took advantage of Alepa being open 24/7 (I already miss this!) and bought myself some breakfast till the next day before going home and being too hyped to sleep for hours.

Trinkets from the show v

Official tour shirt, Book with messages from @smimon @tuherrus @j-restlessgeek @follivora @wednesdayday @king-krisu and @bisonaari

Quebec mascot magnet, Canada postcard, KSC bracelet and bracelet clip from @bisonaari

Two stickers from @smimon

Cornpea John sticker from @omppupiiras

Personalized Häärijä bracelet + Morgan bracelet from @carpblu

Ihan Sama, Bojan Titanic and Paidaton Riehuja bracelet from @formulalakana

Honorary Pöyhönen and spiked bracelet from @j-restlessgeek

Green Lantern Guy bracelet from @solsortemor

KSC bracelet from @teal-skull

Strength tarot card from @tuherrus

Cat drawing w. message from @katinkulta

Pokemon card I'd found on the road (as you do)

Tequila bracelet (forgotten from whom)

The setlist (!!!)

Traffik bracelet, Kris and Eevee stickers from @jaarijani

Wisconsin postcard from @clovermoonspell

[sihtricfedaraaahvicius]

My EACON3 post is finally here... with all my photos.

I'll skip the trip and go straight to the con because I fear it's going to be a long one. I am not going into details about the panels and other things that went on, but mainly about my interactions with the guests as that's what the con is about, right? I am also probably forgetting a bunch of stuff, so I might add things later if I recall them again, and here and there I may remember things in a different order.

The con started friday evening, I had won tickets to the game night and let me tell you I was terrified and not prepared. On top of that I was exhausted from the trip and had shitty medication side effects too because I had swapped meds earlier that week. Yes, fuck my life.

To make all THAT worse, while I was waiting in line to enter the game room I got texts from my friends who were at the cocktail party with the guests and they told me Arnas had long(er) hair and some facial hair. It was over for me before it started (IYKYK)

Luckily his facial hair was minimal and his hair wasn't long enough for me to go insane, but still, the tone was set and I avoided him like the fucking plague for real

Let me first say that I didn't expect Arnas to recognise me to be fair, as it had been like, what, half a year since we met in Germany? We had a brief interaction on insta a few days before eacon tho and that had made me a little anxious that he might remember me, but I did not want to be delusional so I kept telling myself he simply wouldn't remember me (haha....)

For the game I was in a team with Eliza, Stefanie and Ossian. Eliza is the life of the party and made everyone introduce themselves in our group. For some reason people always struggle with my name, so I had to repeat my name like 5 times and the entire group eventually shouted my name back at me to get it right, which the whole room could more or less hear, and behold; I looked up and saw Arnas glanced my way and then I just knew for sure that he now knew it was me (and I stressed out)

The game itself was hilarious, we played the card game Werewolves and Eliza was simply so much fun, Stefanie was more quiet but so sweet and Ossian… fucking hell, me and Ossian became rivals real fast. He kept saying he didn't trust me (in the game) and felt I was suspicious, which led to him turning the whole group against me and being cast out (which was part of the game). Eventually it turned out that he was completely wrong about my character in the game and, well, I casted him out the next round in revenge. We were going at each other, lovingly, and he was 100% the biggest surprise of the weekend for me by how cool he was and I became an instant fan of him because of his personality. 10/10, cool dude!

Random note: at some part during the game I heard Arnas laugh so hard in his own group while our group tried to concentrate and I struggled not to burst in laughter because of that and it was rough.

When the game was over, Christian and Harry stopped by every group for a brief chat and wow; Christian, beautiful man irl?! He also photobombed my group photo we took afterwards. 10/10, lovely dude! and Harry was HILARIOUS. Did not expect, another 10/10!

After the game I left the room and literally walked past Arnas without looking at him because I just couldn't??? I was so nervous because of the stupid jokes I made to him since Germany, I just couldn't face him for some reason and my meds side effects made me want to hide (constant flushed cheeks, it's awful, even when I'm shivering cold) however, I felt bad about avoiding him because I worried then maybe he wondered why I didn't say hi when we clearly "knew each other" so to say but, well, I went to bed and called it a night.

Saturday morning was rough. I slept well, the meds side effects had lessened so I looked more decent (until later that day again ugh) and I had a selfie lounge ticket for 10am (that's no hour for selfies). I met up with @mrsarnasdelicious and we stuck together for the lounge.

James was the first to approach us, and he was incredibly lovely (and tall, wow). He asked us where we were from and was overall just super kind. We took a few photos and then he continued to the next people. 10/10!!

Then Stefanie came over and again, she is lovely and gooooooorgeous!! She told me she liked my dress as it had the shoulders cut out and she loved that it showed my tattoos. I can't remember what else we talked about unfortunately, but just know she was a pleasure to meet. 10/10, hope to meet her again!

Up next we had Mark! I was so excited to finally talk to him, because in Germany I only saw him during my duo photo op, and we couldn't really talk. I told him I was super excited about him being in the second season of Rogue Heroes and he was so enthusiastic I mentioned it that he rambled on about several things that happened on set when he was filming that season and my heart was so, so happy. I did truly have a hard time keeping up with him talking because of his accent. Mark also agreed that 10 in the morning was an ungodly hour for a selfie lounge and we felt both tired lmao. He's a whole 10/10!!

Eliza was next and she remembered me from the game night and I ended up telling her that I saw on her insta that she went to a Coldplay show in Sweden earlier that year, which I was supposed to go to as well, but I had to sell my tickets due to several reasons. We had a Coldplay fangirl moment and it was everything, I got to show her my several Coldplay tattoos as well and basically she's just a queen who hypes everyone up. Love her! We agreed that at the next Coldplay tour we'll be together at the show (I wish!) 10/10!!!!

Then we met Eysteinn!! My god!! No words. He is so sweet and shy and soft spoken, we absolutely vibed. We bonded over the fact that we both love to travel by train and really don't like travelling by plane. He loves to journal during his trips while I told him I love to read or just watch the scenery. Absolutely a blessing of a man! When I took our selfie I told him that I suck at taking selfies, and he said he has the same problem, so we just made the best of it together. 14/10, he's absolutely adorable.

The dreaded moment arrived…………… Arnas came up to us at this point and I had no chance of avoiding him anymore and all my bad jokes flashed before my eyes-

He greeted me with a happy 'Labas!' (Hi in Lithuanian) and he gave me a hug and I told him 'Laba diena' (good day) which he said was very good. Before I could say anything else he asked me where Danas was (long backstory to this, won't write that all here) I told him Danas did not want to join me to the con so he's back home. Arnas then went on a ramble about how he understood that, because he also wouldn't want to be in the same room with the guy his partner would have a crush on and also wondered why it's okay for women to have crushes, but boyfriends are not allowed to have crushes. I said 'I asked Danas several times who his crush is, but he always tells me he has none.'

Arnas was very pleased with himself here and said; 'haha, see, I totally tricked you into telling me I'm your crush, because I didn't know that.'

me: well *rolls eyes, lowkey shrug* (I believe at this point he "teased" @mrsarnasdelicious for a moment and girlie, you know you were rightfully flustered and it was cute, while I was left rather unphased by his remarks and I still believe that is why he began to rile you up hahaha)

Arnas then went on about the crushes problem in relationships and mentioned to me his gf would "not be happy" if he had a crush. He then somehow flipped the topic towards being obsessed with someone and I cut him off there saying; 'wow, but now you're implying I'm obsessed with you, and that is completely something else.'

Mans got put back in his place and apologised because he was totally blowing smoke up his own ass there (in his own words) and agreed that having a crush and being obsessed are two different things. And honestly the whole moment was chaotic and very surreal.

We also somehow ended up talking about other Lithuanian words and I told him I knew the word that means chicken, which he agreed was very important to know and we started saying 'chicken' in different languages, he then asked me what the French word was and we pondered for a second but I then remembered and it was rather wholesome and completely random????????

We finally got ready to take our selfie but then he wanted to record a video for Danas in Lithuanian. He started talking and I was like; 'what, no, I'm taking a photo?' He then said we could take a photo first but insisted on the video so yeah we made a video where he said some Lithuanian saying and yeah.. It was again very, very surreal. 10/10, still baffled he remembered me and Danas, who he has never met.

Up last we met Timothy and I told him I was very excited to meet him, because in Germany I was too broke to get a photo with him. We spoke about the German con and he said how surreal that con was because he had slept at the airport, arrived just in time, then at one point he went to the toilet and walked into William Shatner, which left him kinda starstruck, and he said 'it felt like I was in the upside down!' and then he apparently walked out of the toilets and walked into a Stranger Things cosplayer and he was about to lose his mind. Genuinely the most amazing anecdote of the weekend. Another 10/10!

Later that day I had polaroid photo ops, one with Eysteinn and one with Arnas. Eysteinn was once again lovely and asked if we should just pose cool, and well, see the result below.

The polaroid with Arnas was chaos again. For some reason he likes to say 'Sanneeeeee' when he sees me (vocal stim? perhaps. also he never struggled with my name, bless) so he did that, but I was exhausted from the whole day and couldn't hide it anymore while he was still high energy. He gave me a hug as I said I was so tired and we then cursed in Dutch at the same time. I asked if he knew anything else in my language and he proceeded to say in Dutch; 'what do you want?' and this left me shook: 'sleep tight, hot thing' (roughly translated). James then asked what language we spoke, we said Dutch, which James thought was cool and he got ready to take the photo. I asked Arnas how we should pose and he went 'should we do the Lithuanian anthem or is that too much?' I jokingly agreed it was too much and we both placed our hand on our heart and James said he loved the pose and told us to hold it. See the result below!

The panels I went to throughout the day were fun and I also met several super lovely people during the day like @whitedarkmoonflower, @bubblyabs (we hung out most of the con and again, bless you!) and also I met @sihtricsafin!

Later that day I was getting an autograph from Arnas and gave him the letters and art some people had sent to me, which he absolutely loved at first quick glance, and he said that his favorite con moment is actually after the con where he goes through the stuff that people have given him. He randomly told me he liked my necklace and I told him I actually got in in Vilnius at a fair earlier that year and he liked that, then asked me which fair it was but I told him I didn't remember. We then spoke a bit about Vilnius in general and it was great. When he saw the keychain that @thalygremlinsson made him (a gremlin with his mismatched eyes) he said he'd put it on his keychain and he also told me a random story how a firework flew into his home when he was a kid while he was playing with a gremlin toy??? I also have no idea besties. Anyway, we got to take another selfie again and…

Speaking about my friend @sihtricsafin… we joined each other in the autograph line for Arnas, and she had bought a recording of her autograph and asked me to film it, which I did, and well, the problems between me and Arnas then began. His handwriting was brought up and he remembered I messaged him as a reply to his story months ago that I thought his writing has not good enough to get tattooed (lighthearted) he agreed then and wrote he was happy I hadn't tattooed it, but apparently he was still "bitter" about that and we got it all on tape.

Also we found out he has never seen Nightmare Before Christmas and did not know who Jack Skellington was after asking my friend about the skull on her beanie (it was Jack), he then jokingly said something like that they didn't have a tv in Lithuania when he was younger. 

Also found out he thinks Muse is a great band and he played Otherside by RHCP on his speaker at some point (bass player!Sihtric confirmed???)

Aaaand that was more or less the end of my saturday at the con!

Sunday was rough. I was very tired from the days before but we pulled through. The day started with a group panel and later that day I had a photo op with Arnas.

Mans absolutely looked me up and down when I approached him at the op and ngl, I am not attracted to Arnas in real life (unless he has the SKMD/Masema haircut and the facial hair) but that split second 100% affected me and left me bewildered for a sec LMAO

I had no idea how to pose, and he said 'oh, classic, Sanne,' (someone was still petty (jk)) and then we both just posed as if we had no clue what to do, but it turned out to look like we are a married couple in the verge of a divorce and I love it

@whitedarkmoonflower gave me an autograph ticket for Mark (as I gave her two selfie tickets so we kinda swapped) and Mark gives great hugs btw! He signed my book but the marker fucked up so I got the cover and the inside page signed by him. bless.

Later that day I had a selfie with Christian and one with Harry because they weren't at the selfie lounge on saturday. Harry was so kind and I wished him good luck with all his future projects and he really really appreciated that. He's so sweet! When I took my photo with Christian he said 'oh, great camera! Or do we just look good because we are two beautiful people?'

Now, I usually ignore compliments bc I suck with them, but I just said 'both,' because in that moment we were just two beautiful people taking a selfie. He said he loved my skull tattoo and that he considered getting a skull tattoo himself (something along those lines) which was really cool???

I then went to Eysteinn to get my polaroid signed, and he said he liked the photo and that we looked like a death metal band. I said I'm up for that and told him I can play drums, he then told me he can play piano and I said we could make that work, to which he smiled (god… that smile). He loves to give hugs, so I got one, and it was great!!

Okay… so, very last minute I decided to get my polaroid with Arnas signed and it was a shit show (positive). It started with the fact he mentioned he didn't like the Beatles (he was playing his own music on speaker again) except for one song and he then looked at me and said 'or is it because I am a snob?' I shrugged and said 'perhaps.' Big mistake. He was "offended" and said he thought he was amongst friends here. I snapped back and told him I heard from my friends the day before that he told them that I trash talk about his handwriting to everyone (something like that). He got defensive and said it wasn't true blahblahblah, we both didn't give up and (lovingly) argued about it. He then finally signed my polaroid and messed up (obviously with that handwriting) and he said that it was my fault (man child) and wrote a petty ass message on the polaroid (toddler). We then told each other (more quietly) that he wasn't talking bad about me and I told him I knew that, but it was sweet of him to clear up that he truly never intended to make something sound bad and I in my turn told him I understood that, and there was this mutual understanding that everything was just a joke but that bickering was rather intense, and I think we both felt the need to make sure we both knew this was never serious, which truly made me love his personality even more.

We ended on good terms and a hug, I told him good evening in Lithuanian and then left. And with that, the con got to an end too.

When I got home the next evening I had only stepped through the door and received a dm from Arnas with a photo of the postcard I gave him, indicating he had read my message to him and it was honestly the most perfect way to end that entire weekend. The timing was insane and I shed a tear!

Well then… if you are still reading this, damn, thank you! I hope you enjoyed this mess of a post and here are the photos. also yes I know, I have like one selfie face, I already said I suck at selfies...

[alex-strike-is-transgender]

Non magic au (special first gen).

Constantine sat down on his bed in his bedroom, letting his face relax for the first time in hours. It ached. Any convincing emotions are hard to express when he didn't actually feel them. He didn't feel anything at the moment. Though that wasn't anything new.

After a few minutes of this he got up, tying his hair back quickly and taking the dumb school uniform tie off. He didn't really care about whether he had the tie on or off but everyone else took theirs off when they got back so he did the same. And he hated the feeling of his hair touching his neck but for whatever reason he'd always get dresscoded for wearing it in a ponytail or bun, and he didn't want it cutting. So he dealt with it. He'd looked through the entire rulebook and couldn't find anything against it but the teachers didn't accept that.

He sighed and quickly checked his phone before anything else. Jericho and Declan were talking in the group chat. He read the messages for a few minutes. They were texting during class earlier. Jericho knew he could get in trouble for that, right? He didn't know about Declan. Declan and his sister Sarah went to a different school from them, their parents couldn't pay for it like Constantine and Jericho's could. Constantine didn't know much about them, at one point Jericho just befriended them and he was dragged along in whatever they were doing and that was that. He didn't like them that much but they were Jericho's friends and they made him happy and that was that.

It's not like Constantine didn't have his own friends. He had Alastair, who he definitely enjoyed the company of more than Sarah or Declan. He didn't know if what he felt was how friendship worked, but Alastair felt like far more of a safe person to be around. At least, someone who wouldn't call him boring when he got nervous about risking something illegal or mimic his expression when he went numb again. Constantine could pull off acting normal easily but it was tiring eventually.

He realised he'd been lost in thought for a good few minutes and shut his phone, remembering what he was up for. He had stuff to do, right. Homework, chores, then he could do his own things. The chalkboard on his dresser had his chores for today listed in bullet points in his mother's neat, cursive handwriting. Walk Kit, put the dark laundry in the washing machine, and put back the clean dishes. That wouldn't be too hard.

It seemed easiest to start with laundry. He left his room to grab the basket from the closet under the stairs. The house felt weirdly quiet, though that might just be because father is still at work. Almost immediately his dog -- a very large husky named Kitten, who he normally just called Kit -- ran towards him and headbutted him. He grinned slightly and petted her on the nose.

"Good girl." He muttered absent mindedly while grabbing the basket. He'll walk Kit once he's finished with everything else.

Only half paying attention, he took all the dark clothes from his own laundry basket and put them in the one he's carrying. Then from his parents room -- his mother is out again. Then he knocked on Jericho's bedroom door.

"What?" Jericho shouted. "I'm busy."

"I'm getting the laundry can I come in?" Constantine yelled back.

"Sure." Jericho sounded irritated. Constantine knew Jericho preferred being left alone after school. He didn't like seeing other people, he had enough of that in school he didn't need to afterwards too. Constantine barely even looked at him. He missed when they were close. But they grew up.

He always knew it'd never last forever. But he didn't realise how temporary it was. They're twins, and throughout their entire childhood they were always known for being inseparable and "never seeing one without the other". Why did it change?

They didn't speak to eachother though. Constantine just shoved the dark clothes in the basket and left. He was thankful for the numb episode for once, he didn't have the time to process what emotions that'd usually give him.

He put the clothes in the machine, shoved everything needed in and turned it on.

Task one done. Just two more to go. And walking Kit is fun.

It felt like he was just going through what he had to do currently with no reason or feeling to it. He hated being numb like this. But it was probably better than whatever emotions he'd have to deal with if he wasn't. He took a deep breath, trying to ground himself back to reality.

Next task. Just put the clean dishes away. That would take ten minutes at most.

Easy. The movements of his arms were slightly calming. Physical sensations helped make up for the lack of emotions currently. Plates in this pile bowls nest to them cups on the other shelf cutlery in this draw with knives in this bit and forks in this and this type of spoon here and the other type of spoon there and the other type of knives in this bit and why the fuck this their a cheese grater in the cutlery draw?

Whatever. He was done now.

"Kitten!" He shouted the dog, who immediately ran over to him and licked him. He attached the lead to her collar and petted her between the ears. "Good girl."

Constantine shoved on his shoes and at a glance out the window his coat as well, putting a ball in one pocket.

Outside was quite cold in the late autumn, with orange and yellow and brown leaves on the ground that Kit seemed very intrigued by. The sun is far too bright for Constantine but he tried to ignore it.

Kit barked. Constantine looked up to see what got her attention.

A person. Definitely a person. Curly black hair, wearing a red coat and the same school uniform as Constantine underneath with leather gloves -- shit that's Alastair. Constantine couldn't help but smile. Alastair was definitely his best friend. He associated him with warmth and comfort like the feeling of a fireplace in winter or the taste of good hot chocolate or--

He realised he hadn't said anything, he'd just been staring awkwardly.

"Connie!" Alastair grinned, running over to him.

"Al," Constantine smiled back, though he was struggling with emotions again. He put one hand on Alastair's shoulder, trying to register his feelings before he acted on them. Alastair was his best friend. Nothing more complicated than that.

Constantine didn't want anything more complicated than that. He was okay with his life how it is, maybe it's not the very best and there were some things he'd change if he could, but it was okay anyways. He didn't want to complicate things.

That's why he didn't tell his parents about Jericho's new things, why only two people in the world know about his occasional numbness and why everything he's interested in stayed between him and his notebooks (and Alastair if he was willing to listen).

Because he didn't want a more complicated life.

"Are you okay?" Alastair brushed Constantine's hair out of his eyes with his hand. Constantine felt his face heat up slightly.

"Yeah, fine. Sorry." Constantine muttered. "Just having a... Day. I don't know." He struggled to put his feelings into words.

Alastair nodded as if he understood. "It's okay. What're you doing anyways?"

"Just walking Kit."

"Can I come with you?" Alastair asked. He sounded quite hopeful.

"Sure."

Alastair grinned and took his free hand. Constantine went red and looked away.

No. He didn't feel. No complicating this with stupid feelings.

He tried to calm his breathing and started to walk again.

[squadron-goals]

Summer 1916

14.7.16

At 2:30 in the morning I slept rather fitfully, I heard quite a racket outside. In a moment, the inevitable Paulicke rushed into the room and shouted: "Gas attack!” I grabbed my standby can and put on my boots. Vogel, who shares my dugout, couldn't find his gas mask because he had left it somewhere. He danced (Me, bad guy that I am, secretly gloated) from one corner of the dugout to the other shouting, "Oh my God, my gas mask, my gas mask." The first smells of hydrogen sulphide, which suggested phosgene gases, were already wafting through the door. I claimed to already have great trepidation. Vogel built a smouldering fire, sat behind it with a whining expression and sucked on a three-layer cartridge at the top of his lungs. In addition, the 23.5s from last night were banging around in the area, as well as bullets of all kinds. This got on his nerves again, he disappeared into a tunnel entrance and lit a fire there, but soon reappeared half-smoked. I increased his fear by saying: "What if we have to go to the front and you without a gas mask!” -- Finally he ran to the staff quarters to look for a gas mask. When the fire died down, I lay down again.

27.7.16

In the south, especially from the Douchy-Bienvillers road, the English fired bottle mines. Our artillery responded with shell bursts that it was a real pleasure to see the black, yellow and white clouds. By the way, I'm getting in holiday spirit now. But you don't know whether you might not think back later on this rough life among men with a feeling: Yes, life was rough then, but consecrated to a firm purpose and carefree. War also has its peaceful moods. Tonight, for example, the sounds of an ocarina flow softly into the mild air from a dugout and hardly a rifle shot disturbs the mood. Leaning against the trench wall, a pipe in his mouth, someone is dreaming of something here, a group is sitting there chatting about this and that. Everything is simple and natural. In any case, this time is better for those who survive it than if they had spent night after night bumming around in smelly pubs and strolling through the big city streets with their hats crooked on their heads and easy women on their arms. In the evening the company commander came to my dugout for a little chat. Yes, there are very pleasant moments in war.

28.7.16

I gathered people together for a patrol today. In the evening, the platoon leader from the 6th who relieved me, Lieutenant Brauns, came to my shelter for dinner with various good things. He wished me “a shot in the neck and stomach.” The English machine guns were firing until 11 a.m. At 11:30, Lieutenant Jünger, Ensign Wohlgemut, Private Bartels and Private Birkner climbed over the wire with a loud groan and stalked towards the English trench.

We were sitting halfway between both trenches when we heard a clicking of wire. Immediately afterwards the same noise sounded very close in front of us and we saw the inevitable dark figures. They disappeared and we crawled closer to a number of figures in front of the English trench. We had already gotten pretty close when the old figures appeared again and seemed to want to get in front of their wire. At the same moment we discovered an insulated conductor wire in front of us. I considered this discovery to be very important and commissioned Wohlgemut to cut off one end of it. While he was still struggling with his cigar scissors, the guys climbed over the wire and started cutting with wire scissors etc. 7 m in front of us. This had to be exploited. "Wohlgemut, hand grenade in between!" (I said this almost inaudibly because I had had enough from the previous patrol.). Rtch! He pulled the safety off and I had the feeling you get when something is absolutely unstoppable. In a very flat arc Wohlgemut threw the hand grenade after the guys. They didn't hear it fall. One second, but what a second that was - - - - - - Boom! A flash of lightning that illuminates tumbling figures. At the same moment I jumped up and with the attacking roar: "You are prisoners" I rushed against the guys. A wild scene now unfolded in a split second. I shoot my gun right in a guy's face. He fell with a hideous scream. To my left, Wohlgemut unloaded his pistol. Private Bartels threw a hand grenade between us at the wrong time, so that by a miracle we remained unhurt. That confused the whole thing. But what was even worse was that after the first shot the magazine popped out of my pistol. It was like a nightmare. I shot and shot, not a single bullet left the barrel, I tore open the chamber door, nothing helped. At the same time, to our left, an M.G. started. Unfortunately there was nothing left but an immediate retreat. I stopped again and fired my pistol at a figure following me. This time it was fortunate that no shot was fired, because it was Private Bartels. Wohlgemut shouted next to me: "Where is the fourth?" "Here he comes!" "Back quick quick!" We quickly made our way to the German trench via mine funnels and shell holes. In front of our wire the bullets hit so hard that I jumped into a filled mine hole that was full of water and blocked by wire. After about 20 minutes, I climbed over our wire with my pants in ruins and jumped into the ditch, greeted happily by our people. Wohlgemut and Bartels were already there, and after a quarter of an hour Birkner also appeared. The people said that they had heard the scuffle very well with all the orders and all the shouting and shooting and were already ready to support us with hand grenades. This is the third patrol I've made to capture a prisoner, but now I know about this too and I'll do it when I go out again. The participants all said that it had been a nice patrol. The main points on which I will make the next patrol are as follows: 1. Only the best people, the more the better. 10 men are not too many. 2. Very precise instruction and encouragement to the people in the resting place. Awakening the sense of sport. 3. Instruct each man what to do, e.g.: You seven kill everyone except the Englishman furthest to the right, who I will take prisoner with the three others. 4. Take a man with you who can speak English. 5. Only the best hand grenades, ball hand grenades from the “Wilhelm” brand 6. Weapons for close combat such as clubs, rubber clubs, sharpened spades. 7. Shortly before the attack, put white bandages around your arm. 8. Every man must know that only great courage can get him out of trouble, so: Parole Blücher!

[broadstbroskis]

no better company than you | nathan mackinnon

a/n: alright, i’m rolling in late for @antoineroussel oussel summer exchange (thank you love, for running such a lovely exchange again, it was wonderful and i’m glad i was able to particiapte) and i’m very sorry for the lateness! i had the pleasure of writing for the lovely @ghstandpucks​ 💜 again, i am SO sorry about the wait but i hope you enjoy this! 

word count: 3.2k

-----

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry I’m late!” You slide into the booth and throw your bag down next to you, hoping to god you don’t look as frazzled as you feel; this restaurant is far too nice.

Nate just smiles at your words, too familiar with your family by now to know that you’re always running 5-10 minutes behind. He’s ordered a bottle of wine- a nice rosé, fitting for the beautiful end of summer day- and had already started pouring a matching glass for you the second you started sitting down. “How’d the interview go?”

You bite your lip. “Eh.” 

“I’m sure it went better than you think.” Nate says encouragingly. “You’re too hard on yourself. All three of you are.”

And well, that’s not a lie. Your siblings were just as critical of themselves as you were. Sid was famously known for it and Taylor, your twin, was as bad as you. But…

“Listen to you!” You laugh at him. Nate’s just as bad as the three of you. A mini-Sid in many ways, to many people in your hometown.

But that was in Canada. This was Denver. And here, Nate was cool. Laid-back. Lowkey. Everything a professional athlete should be. Nobody knew about what a dork he really was, except his teammates.

And now, maybe you too, if all went well with this job interview.

“Don’t know what you’re talking about.” Nate says, looking at his menu to feign ignorance.

You giggle, pulling your own up toward your face. “Sure, buddy.”

It’s not often that you and Nate spend time one on one like this, even if you see him all the time over the summer. He’s usually with your brother when you see him, politely trying to decline your mom’s invites to dinner or already hanging at Sid’s house when you invite yourself over to your brother’s house for pool or lake time. Usually time one on one with Nate like this is brief, usually like in passing while he’s waiting for Sid in the kitchen while you’re eating.

It’s nice. Nate’s funnier than people give him credit for and it’s easy to relax into dinner and conversation, to forget about the anxiety from your interview as you chat about what’s new for both of you and gossip about people you both know.

By the time he drops you off at your hotel, it’s late and you’re too tired (and maybe just on the right side of tipsy) to even worry about the interview. You just barely change into pajamas, run through your nightly routine, and climb into bed, before shutting the lights off. It feels like you’re asleep before your head even hits the pillow. 

In the morning, you’re awoken by the sound of your phone ringing, and it takes a second for you to place the sound, but when you do you pounce on it, recognizing the local area code immediately. “Good morning.” You say, trying your hardest not to sound like you woke up literally thirty seconds ago.

It’s human resources, from the job you interviewed for yesterday.

You got it.

-----

“Ew, no!” Your dad holds his hands up innocently, when you rush over to stop him from unpacking a box. “Why would you put that there?”

“Hey, sweetie, maybe it’s time for a break.” Your mom says gently, exchanging a look with your dad, who nods his agreement enthusiastically.

Which is fair. You’d just about almost taken his fingers off just because you didn’t like where he was unpacking colanders. 

“Dinner!’” Your dad latches onto immediately. “Nate offered to take us all out tonight, I’ll let him know we’re ready.”

“Ready?” You frown, looking down at your workout shorts and baggy t-shirt.

“We’ll be ready in an hour.” He amends, already texting Nate.

Nate knocks on the door to the new condo you’re renting an hour and fifteen minutes later, sheepishly grinning when your dad tells him that you and your mom still need a few minutes. “Thought I had my timing perfect.”

Your dad snorts. “Oh buddy. Keep dreaming.”

He’s not too off on his timing, but unfortunately for Nate, you don’t have too much else going for you in your condo yet. Your dad had gotten your TV all set up, but in addition to the TV and living room furniture, you haven’t gotten much else, and that includes food and beverages. So the two of them sit in mostly silence while they wait another few minutes for you and your mom to finish getting ready. 

“I told you that you should have just met us there.” You tell Nate, as he trips on a box on his way out the door.

“Oh, so this wasn’t deliberate sabotage?” He deadpans.

“You caught me. Just trying to keep you around the city full time until I have time to make better friends.”

Nate laughs, as the two of you follow your parents out the door. “Be nicer to me or I won’t introduce you to my friends.”

“Who said I want to be friends with your friends?”

“Children.” Your mom turns to look back at you and Nate smiles at her innocently, but it’s been a while since that’s fooled her. “Do we need to stay home?”

It serves to get the two of you moving, even as you laugh at her joke. Nate drives you to another one of his favorite restaurants, and dinner flies by, with Nate insisting on picking up the tab, even when your dad tries to fight him on it. 

It’s started to cool down a little by the time you’re walking back toward the car, Nate and your dad still fake-fighting about paying for dinner, and you find yourself not realizing you’re smiling at the two of them as you walk behind them until your mom bumps your shoulder. “A few hours off for dinner with some good company was just what you needed.” She says.

And even though the smile on her face seems too knowing, you’re too tired to ask about it right now, so you just nod in agreement. “Yeah, this was nice.” You smile back at her.

-----

Mel Landeskog pokes her head around the corner and you wave at her, trying to catch her attention. “Jesus Christ.” She shakes her head. “I didn’t think he was serious.”

“I mean.” You bite your lip. “I did have to work today.”

“I would have picked you up!” She shakes her head, muttering under her breath, and you know Nate’s going to get an earful from her later. “But no, no. That dumbass just let you come all the way over here by yourself. Sends me a text to come meet you by the door. All casual.”

“I mean.” You send her a look. “Did you expect anything different from Nate?”

It’s the way she looks at you and sets her face that almost has you nervous for Nate. You’ve known Mel for a long time now, but really, you don’t know her from more than just years of NHL events. “I do now.” She says.

You hope Nate knew what he was getting himself into sending Mel a text to come find you earlier.  

Once she leads you up into the box with some of the wives and kids, she’s back to smiling and laughing, making introductions all around. The mood all around is light and easy, everyone excited for the home opener of the season, and happy to be back with everyone again. 

It’s fun to be back in this atmosphere. Hockey’s been a part of your life for so long and there’s truly nothing like the energy of the first game of the season. You feed off the energy, catching up with some familiar faces and chatting with all the other girls, probably too excited when they invite you to a girl’s night later in the week, but it feels good to have plans that don’t involve trying to invite yourself to Nate’s when you’re bored.

“Hey, good job tonight.” You nudge him afterwards, catching up with him in the family room.

He laughs, pulling you in for a hug. “A little different than what you were used to?”

“It lived up to the hype, I guess.”

“I’ll turn you from a Pens fan.” Nate promises. 

It’s your turn to laugh. “Feel Sid’s wrath.”

“What’s he going to do? Check me into the boards? Bring it.”

Nate’s been hanging out with your brother and your family for years now, so he should really know better by now. “Okay, buddy.” You pat his shoulder patronizingly. “Sure.”

“I could take him.” Nate insists. 

“Throw hands. Next game. I dare you.” 

He side-eyes you, because you both know that’s not going to happen and it’s only a minute before you’re both laughing. 

“I better see you on Friday!” Ashley Kadri shouts out to you as she’s walking past with Naz and Naylah, interrupting your laughter. “No excuses!”

“I’ll be there!” You call back. “Promise!”

When you look back, Nate’s pouting-exaggerated, albeit, but pouting. “Are you ditching me this Friday?”

“Yup. Found better company.”

“How dare you?” He cries. “There is no better company.”

“Well.” You shrug. “I’ll know for sure after happy hour on Friday.”

“Find your own ride home.” Nate says and then he starts speed walking away from you at an absurd speed.

“Nate!” You protest, jogging to catch up and he finally slows down enough for you to catch up when you round the corner, bumping your shoulder right back when you purposely bump into him in retaliation.

-----

No one lets loose like a group of moms when they’ve got a night without their kids.

Someone has mentioned this to you before, at a bachelorette party or a wedding or something, but you don’t think you’ve ever seen it really in action before until this happy hour. 

“If the waitress comes back, order me another drink!” Kerry calls, before running off to the bathroom.

The waitress nods at her, before addressing the rest of you. “Another round?”

“Oh, please!” Mel nods quickly and repeatedly.

“Can we get a few more orders of mozzarella sticks too, please?” You look down at the empty plates in front of you. “And maybe some nachos too?”

“Yes!” Jackie lights up across from you. “Great call!”

It pretty much only goes downhill from there and by the end of the night, both Mel and Ashley are crying for reasons no one is sure of entirely and you’re pretty grateful to see Nate among the group of husbands and boyfriends to come to pick up all their girlfriends.

So grateful you scream his name the second you see him. “Nate!”

He winces, trying to pull his ear away from you, but he’s laughing. “Guess you had a good time, huh?”

“Uh huh!” You nod enthusiastically, not realizing how loud you are until he winces again.

Nate laughs. “Alright, I think it’s time to go home.”

You gasp loudly. “I can’t leave my new friends!”

“Your new friends are all leaving you!”

You frown, but look around and realize he’s right. Naz has already sneakily pulled Ashley out of the bar and Gabe and Erik were collecting Mel and Jackie’s things. “Oh.”

“Oh?” Nate parrots. “Come on, get your stuff, crazy girl.”

“Hey!” You protest, grabbing your purse. “I am the least crazy person in my family.”

“I hate to break it to you.” Nate says, as he guides you into standing. “But that’s not saying much.”

He’s right, but you bump him with your shoulder anyway as you walk past. That’s about sibling honor and shit.

Nate parked too far away and by the time you reach his car, you’re leaning on him, the adrenaline from hanging out with friends wearing off quickly. Nate’s nice about it, guiding you to his car and then helping you into his front seat before heading around to the driver’s side. 

“You guys had a fun time then?” Nate says, once he’s started driving and you’re half asleep leaning against the window. “Looks like it at least.”

“Yeah.” You nod sleepily. “But you were right.”

He chuckles. “About what?”

“There’s no better company than you.”

-----

Nate becomes pretty clingy after that night, texting and facetiming whenever he’s out of town, and stopping by pretty much anytime he’s got a free minute. It quickly becomes something you look forward to, missing his visits when he’s out of town and looking forward to his calls, smiling when his texts come in and breaking up your work day. And it isn’t long before you realize that you’re being just the same. Sending him messages before and after games. Inviting yourself over for dinner and making Nate cheat on his diet.

In a blessed move from the NHL scheduling department, Sid and the rest of the Pens are scheduled to arrive in town on a Friday morning and aren’t leaving until the end of the weekend. 

They have a practice scheduled for early afternoon, which is perfect for you to wrap up your work day before heading over to watch the end.

Geno lights up when he sees you watching from the glass, the first person to acknowledge you, and skating over in the middle of the drill, leaving behind two shocked linemates. “Mini!” He shouts cheerfully, even as you roll your eyes at your least favorite nickname. All because you happen to be the shortest of your siblings. “Great to see you.”

“You too, Geno.” You smile warmly at him, a little annoyed that you can’t get a giant bear hug from your favorite pseudo-older brother right away. “But I don’t think a few other people feel the same right now.” You jerk your chin back over his shoulder. 

He turns his head quickly but then looks back. “Psh. They’ll get over it.”

You bust out laughing, which is right about when your brother comes over, and in classic Sid fashion, is all about hockey. “Stop being a distraction.”

“I was minding my own business until Geno came over here!” You protest, even as Geno starts laughing and Sid eyes you skeptically. 

“Why don’t I believe that one?” Sid says dryly and sure, maybe you were making faces at some of the guys you knew well as they were passing you, but you weren’t actively being a distraction.

“That’s your prerogative.” You tell Sid, who shakes his head and pulls Geno back for the remainder of practice. 

Practice doesn’t last for too much longer and you spend a few minutes chatting with the coaching staff while you wait for Sid to change. But he and Geno finally come out of the locker room and you stop mid-sentence to throw yourself at your brother.

Sid’s laughing and so are you, but both of you start laughing even harder when Geno pulls you both into his arms. “Two of my favorite people!”

“Taylor’s going to be so offended.” Kris grins, watching the three of you amused.

“Taylor?” You grin back at him, going for a hug once Geno releases you. “How about his wife and kid?”

“Those are my other favorite people.” Geno reasons.

“Now I’m offended.” Kappy deadpans.

“You’re not even close.” Geno grins, roughing his hair.

Kappy tries to get him right back, but Geno just swats his hand away and then Sid’s shaking his head, like this is just the same shit, different day. “Look what you did.”

You grin, leaning against him. “Not sorry. I’ve missed this entertainment.”

Sid shakes his head. “Then you can round them up for dinner.”

You do. Easily.

Nate had suggested one of the team’s favorite restaurants and you’re happy to see that he’d accepted your invitation to join everyone, even if he rolls in a little late. You’re deep into Kris’ camera roll, looking at pictures of his kids and catching up on stories that you haven’t heard about them recently, so you don’t even notice he’s arrived and said hello already until he blows on the back of your neck.

You jump. “What the hell?”

Nate’s grinning. “Hey.”

You shake your head at him and bump your shoulders against him. “Hey.” You mimic and then turn right back to Kris.

But your shoulder stays leaning on Nate, and it remains there comfortably all night.

-----

Sid’s a little cranky when you first meet him for breakfast the morning after the game and you’re sure it has everything to do with the last minute turnover that cost them the game (and bragging rights over Nate this summer, which is really what he’s probably cranky about).

He gets over it pretty quickly though, and soon the two of you are laughing and talking, catching up about your family and your lives.

“-and I even love my office, the vibes are just great!”

Sid shakes his head. “Vibes.”

You grin. You know he hates that word. “Good vibes.” You confirm.

“So you’re liking Denver?”

“Love it.” You confirm, smiling.

“Meeting good people?”

You eye him skeptically. “Yes dad. I already said my coworkers are great and I’ve been hanging out with Nate and his friends a lot too. It’s good”

“Geno thinks there’s something going on between you and Nate.” Sid says casually.

The jump of your heart is far from casual. “Oh yeah?”

Sid eyes you but his response to that is surprising. “You know if there was something going on between you and Nate that would be okay?” He pauses, watching you again, but your face is completely neutral, purposely not moving. “Right?”

“You know if there was something going on between me and Nate that your opinion wouldn’t matter at all, right?”

He grins, laughing as he nods, but after he takes a bite of pancakes he says, “To you, yeah. To him, it does.”

“Why?” You blurt out, giving yourself away before you can stop yourself.

But Sid doesn’t say anything to that. He grins again and then changes the subject entirely.

-----

You only make it about a day before you’re knocking on Nate’s door, pretty forcefully.

“What’s up?” He swings the door open, with a frown. “You okay?”

“Does what my brother thinks really matter to you that much?” You blurt out. It’s been bothering you ever since Sid mentioned it at breakfast. That you lasted this long was probably a miracle.

Nate blushes and your jaw drops. “It-”

“Oh my god.” You grin delightedly. “Come on, really?”

“That’s not-” He blows out a frustrated sigh. “You’re really going to make me say it?”

You nod, but you’re pretty sure he’s not going to get far into what he’s going to say.

He sighs again. “It’s not about, like, his approval, or shit. It’s just- he’s important to you. So obviously he’s important to me-”

You kiss him. 

“You know that you don’t even have to worry about that, right?” At some point, you’d slid one hand to his hip and the other arm around his neck, and the hand there plays with the hair at the nape of his neck. 

“I’ll argue about that with you later.” Nate says impatiently and so you’re laughing when he kisses you again.

[marvelouspeterparker]

all worth it

pairing: tom holland x interviewer!reader

summary: tom is an actor, doing interviews is a part of his job. but there’s just something about you that makes him feel like the stress that comes with press tours and interviews is all worth it.

warnings: none, just fluff

notes: literally got this idea from looking at an onward interview gif (the one where he recites the lines from back to the future, iykyk) also imagine the pandemic never happened in this jfskgh

so tom loves his job, obviously

he gets to be his number one favorite superhero, make people happy, do what he loves, and more

but that doesn’t mean that there are no downsides to his career

there is actually a lot of stress that comes with being in the limelight and that includes people constantly watching your every move, being critiqued, questioned and put on the spot

and the perfect time for all this to occur? during interviews

now some of the time, interviews are nice, sometimes they’re even fun

but unfortunately a lot of the time, the same questions are asked in each and every one, one after the other, for hours on end and it honestly gets very boring and very draining very fast

so to be quite frank, he wasn’t expecting much when he walked into the next room for his last interview of the day

but when you walked in, he couldn’t help but perk up a bit

you were pretty and you seemed very nice as well, greeting everyone, including the crew as you made your way over to tom, jacob and zendaya

some of the interviewers would just walk straight to their seat and start the questions almost immediately, no warmth in their manners––but you, you were different

you shook each of their hands, smiling wide as you said hello

you couldn’t really contain your enthusiasm, you were a big marvel fan, and a fan of each of them, so you couldn’t tame your smile even if you wanted to

your energy was infectious and tom was more than grateful for it

when you reached him, he looked into your eyes deeply and you had to snap out of your daze before you made a fool of yourself

‘hello darling’ he licked his lips as he looked up at you, a gracious smile on his face and you blinked a couple times before responding

‘hi it’s––so nice to meet you, i’m a big fan.’ you turned to look at the others, ‘of all of you, really.’ 

they all ‘aww’ed and accepted your compliments, thanking you as you took your seat

when you were given the green light to start, you gave a curt nod to the crew behind the cameras and started right away

you were professional and good at your job, making the cast feel welcome and at ease after a long day of work

you told jokes, asked interesting questions that others hadn’t and since you were a marvel fan, you were able to ask specific questions that showed your genuine interest in the comics, the films, the plots and more

tom could feel himself getting more comfortable as the interview went on and the smile never left his face throughout the entire thing

when it ended and they turned the cameras off, you all felt a bit disappointed that you would have to say goodbye so soon, you were all having a good time and genuinely laughing so hard that your cheeks hurt 

you thanked them all for their time and jacob was quick to wave you off

‘no thank you––i think we can all agree that we saved the best for last today.’ he looked to his friends and they nodded along

zendaya chimed in ‘for real, this was fun.’

you smiled, honored that you managed to make their day a little better and tom spoke up quietly, making you turn to look at him

‘yeah this, this was really great. thank you y/n.’

you could feel your cheeks heating up but you nodded, smiling as you tried your best to calm your raging heartbeat ‘my pleasure’

tom would have loved to speak with you more afterwards honestly, but unfortunately as soon as he exited the room, he and his friends were being ushered towards the next location for the day, preparing for the long week they still had ahead of them

though you had hoped to see more of tom, you only had one interview with him, so you wouldn’t be seeing him any time soon

or so you thought, anyway

your boss surprised you with a chance to go to the premiere, and interview some of the cast and other actors on the red carpet of course (since you were there for work)

you honestly thought that if tom did see you, he would only give you a small wave, maybe a slight head nod at best since you’d already interviewed him, but to your surprise, when he saw you, he smiled immediately and made his way over to you, swerving away from his entourage (which consisted of his brothers, assistant, and others you didn’t recognize)

‘hi love, how are you?’ 

his eyes were shining under the bright lights on the carpet and there were hundreds of shouts and conversations going on around you, but he somehow managed to make you focus only on him, from his voice and presence alone

‘good! how are you? you excited? nervous?’

he laughed, tilting his head, ‘both, but you know, i’m really proud of this film and i’m ready for people to see it’

you didn’t have much time to talk since there were plenty of other interviewers, journalists and on top of that he had to take pictures so you wished him good luck and he thanked you genuinely

‘i have to run, but be sure to tell me what you think of the movie afterwards, yeah? i know you’re a marvel fan, wanna see if it lives up to your standards’ he winked and you stuttered for a bit, agreeing as he walked off 

you were shocked that he wanted to hear your opinion, but granted there was a camera on you both, which you might have forgotten about while you were talking

but you couldn’t help but think, was that flirting? does he really want to know what i think?

you tried to push the butterflies down and focus on the film as you watched and honestly, it was easy to forget about everything else once you looked at the screen

the film, the plot, tom––everything was so captivating and entertaining, you couldn’t look away even if you tried

it wasn’t until after the film had ended, and you’d stayed for both end credit scenes that you realized you had no way of contacting tom

surely he would have things to do after this, after parties maybe? so you most likely wouldn’t see him outside

and it’s not like he followed you on instagram––he probably wouldn’t even see your dm if you sent one

as you were on your way out, thinking about all this, you felt a hand tap your shoulder and you turned, a smile on your face

but soon realizing it wasn’t who you’d hoped, you tried to not let the disappointment show on your face but as you looked clearly, you realized the man looked familiar

‘hi’ he smiled, ‘i’m tom’s assistant’ you nodded, greeting him a little confused

‘tom’ he started, pulling a piece of paper out of his pocket, ‘wanted me to give you this’ he handed you the paper and you opened it, feeling your stomach jump when you realized a number was scribbled on it, signed -tom ;)

without even realizing, you stared at the ink on the paper for a few seconds silently before his assistant snapped you out of it

‘he wanted you to know that he’s not a dick and he would have come if he could’

you laughed and looked up at him

‘honestly he felt really bad he couldn’t come himself, trust me.’

you nodded and put the paper in your bag, ‘thank you, i’ll be sure to use this’ you smiled

he smiled too, ‘tom hopes you will’ 

you had a feeling that tom would be busy that night, and probably hungover the next morning, so you waited a couple of days before contacting him

and during those two days, tom was honestly freaking out inside...and outside

were you not interested? was he too forward? did he do something wrong? did you get the wrong idea of him?

he was even texting harrison, jacob and zendaya about it in their group chat

tom: i’m an idiot aren’t i

zendaya: yeah but we already knew that

tom: 😑

harrison: i’m sure she’ll text you, maybe she’s just busy

jacob: yeah man, you’re a total catch

jacob: and anyway if she doesn’t want you, i’ll have you 😏

tom: thanks babe 😘

zendaya: i’m just gonna go––

tom: but anyway, i don’t think i’ll ever shoot my shot ever again because this is just embarrassing

not even a full minute passed before the he send the next text 

tom: nevermind she just texted me

tom almost dropped his phone when he saw the message pop up

maybe: y/n: hi tom! this is y/n :) i’m free to give you my thoughts on the movie when you are

you felt like you were going to be sick when you hit send on the message––you didn’t want to bother him, it’d been several days, what if he changed his mind? 

and you––nevermind he responded immediately

tom: hi darling :) i’m glad you used my number 

tom: i’m free to talk now actually, we could facetime if that’s easier? only if you want, of course

you paused when you read his text, luckily you had showered and gotten dressed today so you didn’t look a mess but you opened the camera just to check if you looked alright

were you really about to facetime tom holland?

when you finished fixing your hair, smoothing down your eyebrows and licking your lips, you swallowed your nerves and replied

y/n: sure, i’d like that

he took a deep breath and hit the call button, eagerly waiting for it to connect when you answered

when you both came into view, you smiled, greeting each other shyly

‘was a little worried when you didn’t call me that night’ he admitted sheepishly

your brows raised, surprised ‘oh i just––i assumed you would have been busy you know, after parties and all that’ you laughed and he joined you, a small smile on his face

‘darling even if you called me during the party, i would have left just to talk to you––missed hearing your voice honestly’ 

when you paused to answer a blush coated his cheeks and you couldn’t help but think how cute he looked

‘sorry was that lame?’ he laughed nervously and you shook your head, biting your lip to suppress your smile

‘no––that was, really sweet actually. i––like talking to you too, it’s really nice’ 

soon you get to talking about the actual movie and you couldn’t stop the praises from flowing

‘honestly it was incredible tom, you were incredible, i loved it’

‘thank you love, i’m really glad you enjoyed it, i was hoping you would.’

and the way that tom smiled bashfully and blushed, even pointing the camera away from his face to hide at one point had you swooning more than ever

after that, you and tom texted here and there, sometimes even facetiming, and he wouldn’t hesitate to compare you to his other interviewers and even tell you about it

‘had an interview today, can’t even compare it to yours, love’ 

you just rolled your eyes, a smile on your face ‘oh shut up, tom’ 

you talk often but due to both of your busy schedules, months go by before you see each other again

you run into him at red carpets for other marvel movies, and there’s never a dull moment between the two of you

‘‘there’s my favorite interviewer’ his smile was wide as he walked up to you. ‘you excited for this one?’

you scoffed, fully having a conversation with tom as though you weren’t on camera ‘of course i am, it looks amazing’

‘even better than my movies?’

you raised your hands in surrender, ‘legally, i can’t answer that’

he put a hand to his chest, acting dramatically offended ‘wow well, i guess it’s time for me to go then’

‘at least save me a seat?’ you joked

‘you know i will’ he smirked

by the time ‘the devil all the time’ press came about, you hadn’t told tom that you were assigned to interview him, honestly it was a last minute schedule change 

honestly, he’d gotten good at hiding his bad moods from the public, but you’d known him for enough time now to be able to see when he wasn’t at his 100%

which is why you could see him visibly brighten up when he walked into the room and saw you

‘what are you doing here?’ he asked, clearly (pleasantly) surprised as he hugged you 

‘uh, my job?’ you joked, ‘you didn’t actually think i only interviewed for the mcu did you?’

he blushed, ‘well i uh––no, obviously not’ he said unconvincingly but you brushed him aside as you got ready for the interview

once you started, tom couldn’t help but smile as he watched you, you were just really good at your job and he enjoyed being with you, even when it was for work

‘so obviously audiences are used to seeing you as peter parker, a rather lighthearted character, despite all the hardships he’s had to face––would you say approaching a character as dark as this was challenging in any way? mentally, emotionally, or just in regards to the fact that the public would be seeing a new, more sinister, villainous side to you?’

‘i mean it was a little daunting, definitely. but i was excited to sort of branch out mentally and challenge myself emotionally for this role––the story was fascinating to me and i was just so proud to be a part of this project, i tried not to think of any downsides.’ 

he paused and licked his lips, a glint in his eyes. ‘and honestly, we all have a little bit of a dark side, don’t we?’ 

you paused. of all times to flirt––

‘well hopefully not to the same extent of your character,’ you joked and thankfully the conversation smoothly transitioned elsewhere

now the fans took notice of your bond with tom

they noticed that tom seemed to smile the brightest and laugh the loudest during your interviews, even jumping into other conversations and answers to questions that were directed to his costars

there were dozens of videos, hundreds of edits––

‘tom falling for his interviewer for 9 minutes straight’

and you’d seen them––it was sort of impossible for you to not

you’d been tagged in so many of them, even your friends sent them to you

i mean you weren’t blind, tom was attractive and he did make your heart flutter but you assumed that he didn’t want a relationship since his career was only progressing, skyrocketing either––it would probably be difficult to maintain a solid relationship, or maybe he just wasn’t interested in you so you said nothing

it wasn’t until he had a break from filming that he asked you to hangout, and still you thought nothing of it, until he asked what time he should pick you up

you paused, and he even thought that you froze when really you were just processing what he said

‘like a––date?’ you asked hesitantly

he smiled, scratching the back of his head nervously, ‘yeah? yeah i––like a date.’

you smiled, ‘i would love to tom. but aren’t you worried about pictures spreading online? headlines and all that? i wouldn’t want to add any more stress––’

‘i promise love,’ he interrupted your worried rant, ‘you make it all worth it.’

[twotapbuz]

The leader and a body guard(Rin x reader)

(Sorry this took so long, school sucked all of my motivation away. You can find the rest of the series here: Eloni )

warning: violence, slight angst with a happy ending

Sometime after the rock revolution, Neon J decided to leave for a 3-week vacation

This meant that you and your coworkers would need to report to Rin

The first couple of days were difficult because Rin didn’t seem to care about the reports and would flirt with whoever was giving him the report

It wasn’t till week two that things began to spiral

1010 had been in the middle of a performance when a fight broke out in the crowd

You jumped out of where you were standing to help control the crowd

You assessed the damage after everything calmed down

The venue + stage was partially destroyed, Purl-Hew lost his glasses and an eye, Haym lost an arm, Zimelu and Eloni’s faces were cracked, and Rin was missing

Rin was missing

This was bad news as the factory still hadn’t been repaired yet which meant that he couldn’t be brought back until Neon J came back

And if Neon J found out that you lost a member of 1010, you and your co-workers would be fired

So your group split into two parts, one half would take Zimelu, Haym, Purl- Hew, and Eloni back to Barraca Mansion while the other half would search for Rin

You were placed into the latter

It had been nearly an hour since Rin was discovered missing and there still was no sign of him. You were definitely going to get fired. While the concert was in Cast Tech, you along with several others were sent to search Metro Division in case he simply went back to Baraca Mansion without telling anyone. You were about to head back when you heard the sound of crashing metal. 

“Hello, is anyone there?” You didn’t mean to say anything, but you were caught off guard. Against your better judgment, you began to walk towards that alley. You were desperate to find him after all.

“Stay back! RETREAT!” shouted a panicked autotuned voice. It was Rin.

“Rin? Is that you? Are you ok?” you rushed down the alley to find Rin hiding next to a dumpster.

“Don’t look at me!” Rin was trying to cover the right side of his face with his arm.

“What? Are you alright?”

“Y-yeah! Do not worry about me, I’ll make it back fine,” Rin tried to stand up, still covering his face, but immediately fell back down because his leg was missing.

“Look… everyone’s worried about you and you won’t be able to make it back by yourself with that leg,” you gestured at Rin’s broken leg. Please let me help you, I know some shortcuts.” You offered your arm. Rin hesitantly lifted his hand for his face and grabbed your hand for support. The metal that covered the right side of her face was gone, revealing the damaged hardware underneath.

You involuntarily flinched, he may not have been human, but it was still pretty jarring to look at something that looked like a person who was missing part of their face. Rin also flinched, covering his missing face with both of his hands now.

“I’m so sorry about that”, you rubbed your neck, “I just… well I didn’t expect the injury to be that bad.”

“You aren’t going to scream, are you?

“What? No, I'm very sorry about that. Besides I’ve seen way worse” you joked, trying to release the tension. Rin hesitantly uncovered his face once again and grabbed your hand and pulled himself up. The two of you dodged the groups of people walking through Metro Divison.

As the two of you were walking through, you couldn’t help but wonder about Rin’s reaction when it suddenly hit you, 1010 got severely injured during the rock revolution. One of these injuries included all of them losing their faceplates. Their fans unsurprisingly freaked out which caused 1010 to explode due to some protocol Neon J must’ve implemented. Your heart sank when you realized Rin’s reaction wasn’t because he was worried about his image, but he was scared of you screaming and what would follow afterward.

——————

After that incident, Rin seemed to act differently towards you. He took you more seriously and listened to your reports

Even after Neón J came back, Rin still came to you for your reports

Probably just practice for when Neón j retires, you thought

As the weeks passed, the time spent on the casual chats you had increased to the point you’d forgot to give him the actual report several times

“And that’s how we got Quienne and Bebe.” Rin had just finished telling you the story of how they got their cats by Haym and Eloni smuggling them in through a box. This was one of many of the 'behind the scenes stories' that Rin had told you. While they didn’t act that much different when they weren’t on camera or in front of a crowd, it was nice to be trusted enough to hear about their personal lives.

“So what about you?”

“Hm?”

“Do you have any good stories? I don’t think it’s fair if I tell all of my secrets after all~.” Rin teased

“Well, I do have one. I was at a dance audition and waiting for my turn to perform and this dude that was performing was pretty much a circus act. He was doing all these frontflips and backflips and it was just crazy. Wish I had recorded it.”

“You used to be a performer? How come you stopped?” Rin curiously asked.

“Nah, I never made it past the first round of auditions. I didn't really mind since I only entered to support a friend.” You sipped on your coffee

“That’s a shame.” Rin paused for a moment. “You know I could always offer you lessons.”

 “that's really nice, but I’ll have to decline. No amount of practice can fix these two left feet.” You looked at the clock, realizing half an hour had passed. You quickly said your goodbye and left to avoid getting into trouble. Rin watched your back as he left, unsure why he couldn’t take his eyes off you.

——————

Rin was walking to his dressing room when he saw you walking alongside several other security staff. As rude as it sounded, Rin normally wouldn’t think twice about the people he worked with. Most staff would either quit from being harassed by crazy 1010 fans or get fired for secretly being 1010 fans who used the job to get access to 1010 content, or worse, 1010 themselves. Rin shuddered as memories of one of the many incidents came back. Rin could count on both of his hands the amount of current staff that has been working for over a year and you were one of them. Rin began to think about the early part of his career when he and his family would actively engage with the staff, talking about both of their personal lives and inviting them over to hang out in the mansion. He and his brothers stopped interacting with the staff after the high turnover started. What was the point of talking with them if they were going to quit and avoid 1010 like the plague or get fired and be avoided by 1010 like the plague. He was glad that he could talk to you. He also liked the sound of your voice and how your eyes sparkled brighter than the LEDs that lit up him and his brothers. Rin blushed at the last thoughts. The sound of your voice and the sparkle of your eyes? It’s not like he was in love with you or anything. He was technically your boss and your relationship was completely professional. Yeah, your interactions were one of his favorite parts of his day and your smile would always brighten his day, but even if he was in love with you(which he is not) there’s still the challenge of gaining the approval of his family and having to deal with his fan’s harassment. He couldn’t let you go through that. Though Rin couldn’t help but wonder what it would be like to talk with you outside of work…even go on a couple dates… maybe he was in love afterall.

——————

You walked past Rin and smiled. Despite your attempts, you fell for Rin's charm just like his fans did and it took you no time to notice this. You knew you were never going to say anything, afterall, everyone knows the rule about not dating coworkers and Rin can choose practically anyone, why would he pick you?

——————

It was the first concert after the rock revolution

The fans were extra antsy due to the lack of content, so it was all hands on deck

You were positioned on the front of the stage

This concert was no different than the previous ones, 1010 were performing, a couple of their fans attempted to jump on the stage, and you could barely hear your own thoughts over the mix of music and cheering. Suddenly both of those stopped. You looked at the stage and so 1010 standing still in mid-performance. You were told about this situation during training: it was either a malfunction or a hacking. You prayed that it wasn’t the latter. 1010 suddenly began to move in sync, but it was different from their normal in sync movement. You saw two fans get tackled to the ground as a red saw blade passed them at what would’ve been chest height. Your radio buzzed loudly as you were given your new orders:

“Get everyone out of there.”

It was chaos as you rushed around to get everyone out of the venue. Those with superhuman abilities(pyrokinesis, levitation, etc) stayed behind to prevent 1010 from leaving the venue. Despite not having any abilities, you stayed behind too. You were running around in the back looking for anyone who still might be there when the rubble from an explosion behind you knocked you to the ground. You quickly got up and saw Rin towering over Neon J. Without thinking, you quickly grabbed a nearby pipe that came from the newly busted wall and smashed it over Rin’s head. This managed to stop his attack, but it also brought his attention to you. He suddenly ran towards you, grabbed you, and threw you against the wall. Your consciousness began to fade in and out as your head collided with the wall. You saw Rin approaching you, then darkness, Rin raising his arm to strike, darkness again, Rin being pulled away by Neón J, darkness again, the inside of an ambulance, and then nothing.

——————

You woke up in a hospital room. Your eyes scanned the room: on your right was a monitor accompanied by an IV drip. On your left was a small table with flowers, a get-well balloon, a couple cards, and a Rin with a worried face sitting on one of the chairs of the room. Rin noticed you were awake and quickly rushed before stopping unsure of what to do.

“Y/N” Rin said, unsure of what to do or say

“Rin”

“Y/N… I’m so sorry about what happened- I didn’t want to-I couldn’t stop- if there’s anything I can do to make it up to you-” Rin began to stutter out of guilt. He kept making sentences but giving up on them and starting new ones.

“Rin, please” Rin paused and looked at you. “It’s not your fault, I know you would never do this” the two of you sat in silence for what felt like an eternity before you continued, “You know... if the offers still up… I’d be happy to accept those dance lessons when I get discharged." Rin began to smile

“Yeah, the offers still up”

——————

Neon J walked through the hospital’s halls. For the past two weeks, he had been personally escorting Rin to your hospital room. He knew Rin felt responsible for your injuries so he didn’t object to this despite the possible security risks(he couldn't keep his boys locked up). He had heard from Rin that you had woken up and he was glad that you were ok, but he had to cut your visitor time short due to an interview that all 1010 members must be present for. He walked into your room to find the two of you sleeping with Rin’s head on your lap. 

“It’ll be fine if Rin misses one interview.” Neon J thought as he closed the door. He also began to wonder how long it will be before Rin introduces you officially to the family.

[tazatouille]

this is how the story goes

word count: 4249

warnings: mentions of death, disassociation, alcoholism and small mention of toxic masculinity

ao3 link

summary: In which Fabian deals with the fact that he doesn't always have to be the hero.

“Let me read to you tonight, my darling.” Mama says to him, holding out her hand. Fabian, being the small boy he is, lets out a giggle and runs over to her, taking it excitedly. She smiles down at him and he sees his own dimples on her cheeks. Fabian can’t help but think that she must be the most beautiful lady to ever live, because of course that would be his Mama. Her silver hair falls like waves down her shoulders and he wonders if one day his hair will grow as long as hers. 

She leads him to their library, hoisting him up briefly so he can pick out a book. He can’t quite read all the titles yet, so he picks the one he can reach, which is a small picture book. Mama brings him close to her chest, holding him with one arm. “Ah, that’s a fine choice, Fabian.”

“What’s it about, Mama?” He asks her, letting her flip the book over in his hands. 

“Hmm… let’s see.” She says softly. “It looks like you’ve picked an Elven tale tonight, one about a handsome adventurer who sails the seas in search of a great sea monster.” 

“That sounds like Papa!” This earns a laugh from his mother, who kisses him on the cheek.

“It does, doesn’t it?” Mama lets go of the book, letting Fabian press it to his chest. Then she carries him out of the library and towards the stairs. “It’s time to get you to bed now, Fabian.”

---

Fabian recalls that day as one of the last days that his Mama ever read to him before bed.

But that was alright, because he’s been fine with that for a while now. He knew even then when little boys grow up, their mamas don’t read them to bed anymore. 

When Fabian gets up for school that morning, he sees her when he glances out his window. Cathilda is patiently watering the rose bushes as she always does in the mornings and Mama is sitting in one of her kimonos, beautiful as always, but carrying with her the heavy weight of time. Time that has caused bags to form under her eyes, her frame to grow thinner and dull her eyes each passing day. Time that has aged her, with every sip of wine she takes from the glass in her hand. 

He turns away from the window.

Fabian’s morning routine is easy. It’s about a half hour of dancing, then he takes a cold shower to wake himself up. Usually, he would go straight to training afterwards, but his Mama has allowed him this single day without morning training. He takes another hour to do his hair and then his makeup. It’s nothing too fancy, just a bit of eyeliner and the tiniest amount of concealer. If it was too heavy, he would sweat it off during practice and Fabian Aramais Seacaster does not let his makeup run.

By the time Fabian heads downstairs, Cathilda is now cooking in the kitchen. She’s humming an old sea shanty, one that she’s sung for him time and time again as a child. When he walks by, he hums along with her, dancing around her to grab his green smoothie.

“Good morning, Master Fabian!” Cathilda greets him, shaking the frying pan. “Do you mind taking this plate to yer mother? She’s waitin' in the dining room.” 

“Good morning, Cathilda!” Fabian says proudly, placing a kiss on her cheek. “Of course, I can.” He scoops the plate up off the counter, carrying it to the dining room. Mama sits at the head of the table, where Papa used to sit. To her right is none other than Gilear, thankfully not in his father's robes again. Fabian tries hard not to fling the dish right at his head and keeps his shoulders up.

"Oh Fabian, my baby boy, how are you this morning? Off to that little adventuring academy again are we?" Mama says, nurturing a glass in her hand. 

"Morning Mama," Fabian greets, setting her plate in front of her. Mama puts down her drink to lovingly pinch his cheeks. He laughs, hoping she doesn't notice when he slides it further away. "I believe me and the boys are going to meet at Basrar's this morning before school, since we aren't training today."

"We stop training for one day and you're already eating ice cream for breakfast? Whatever will we do with you?" Mama teases with a wave of her hand. He takes the seat to her left, purposely not making eye contact with Gilear.

Here's the thing about Gilear. He may be the Chosen One, something that Fabian is willing to admit and even defend, however, Gilear is still Gilear, and Gilear is a sad, pathetic little man who did not deserve his Mama.

Fabian could admit that his Mama and Gilear did have some similarities, as they seem to be both inept at the simplest of tasks. That being said, Hallariel Seacaster was an accomplished and renowned fencer, who dashingly took his father's own eye. Gilear Faeth was an ex-diplomat who couldn't get the yogurt stains out of his shirt even with the highest levels of magic money could provide.

This isn’t how the story is supposed to go. After Fabian heroically killed his own father, his mother was supposed to find another adventurous and even in some ways, more deserving man. In the story, Mama does not end up with a man like Gilear, but with a man far better than maybe even his father ever was. Or perhaps, she remains a widow, vowing never to remarry because her love for her deceased husband is so strong.

And in the story, Fabian is supposed to feel proud for killing his father, laying the final blow that his Papa craved so adamantly. But all Fabian is left with is a vacancy, the same vacancy that still rests in his mother's heart. 

At times, it almost feels hereditary.

He stares down at his smoothie and thinks he hears Gilear say something to him, but it goes unaddressed. 

Fabian thought it would get easier after sophomore year. Seeing his Papa was a treat, surely. Knowing his father is having such a good time in Hell helps him sleep a little easier, but it’s not enough to snuff out the flames of guilt that still burn in his chest.

Ever since his Papa died, his mother used the sensory deprivation egg less and less. To Fabian’s surprise, it was his mother’s decision, with Cathilda helping her steadily ease out of it. Cathilda told him that if they were able to get her out of the egg, they might be able to move onto her sobriety. He still holds onto that hope, even on the harder days when his mother can only greet him after school and then retire to her room soon after. 

“You know she loves you with all her heart, Master Fabian.” Cathilda said to him one night. “People are complicated, ya see… Just because she’s struggling doesn’t mean she loves you any less.” 

Fabian comes back to reality when he hears his mother’s laughter. He downs the rest of his smoothie, a little too warm now, to distract himself. He pulls out his crystal to check the Boyz’ group chat. “Well Mama, I think I’ll be off!” Fabian says, getting up from his chair. 

“Off already, darling?” Mama asks him, brushing a lock of hair behind her ear. She’s barely touched her food. “Come here.” 

He leans down and lets her place a kiss on his cheek. “You have a good day, my boy.” She tells him. 

“Of course, Mama.” Fabian smiles at her, then nods his head. “Gilear.”

Gilear nods back. “I wish you a good day, Fabian.” 

He walks out of the dining room, giving Cathilda a wave before heading towards the front door.

“Hangman,” Fabian thinks. “Ready for the day?”

He hears the purr of the engine start up as soon as he closes his front door. “I am ready for anything, sire. Where shall we go?”

“Head to the Ball’s apartment. I’m picking him up this morning.”

“Hangman...” Fabian warns, watching him roll out of the garage in front of him. The Hangman revs in response. “We are picking up the Ball.” 

“Master, I remind you that the Ball no longer needs a ride to school.”

Fabian is sure if the Hangman could, it would sigh in disappointment. “Of course, sire.” He leans slightly to let him climb on. Then, Fabian revs the engine himself and tears down the street towards Strongtower Luxury Apartments. 

---

“Fabian, for the last time.” Riz starts, walking out of the apartment building. “I’m never gonna get enough driving hours if you keep giving me rides to school.”

Riz lost his hat after sophomore year, and thank goodness because Fabian didn’t have the heart to tell him it wasn’t going to work forever. He wouldn’t admit it to Riz, but he was quite fond of the way his hair fell. It seemed impossible to Fabian that Riz didn’t style it in any way, but one day while they were hanging out, Fabian spotted a bottle of all in one shampoo and conditioner and chucked it into the garbage can.  

Fabian laughs, putting a hand on his chest. “As if you would prefer to drive your mother’s car over a ride on the Hangman?” The Hangman revs underneath him for emphasis. He can see the smile creeping on Riz’s lips, so he keeps going. “Besides, everyone lies about their driving hours anyway. Who has the time to drive a whole forty hours both night and day? I certainly don’t.”

Riz looks like he’s about to protest, but instead his face spreads into a big smile. Fabian pats the Hangman’s seat victoriously. “Come on, The Ball. To Basrar’s.” 

With a roll of his eyes, Riz climbs onto the Hangman, situating his briefcase against his chest. Then, his arms wrap around Fabian’s torso tightly. “You aren’t always gonna be around to give me rides, you know. I should-- uh, probably learn how to drive at some point.” He says. It’s supposed to be casual, but in reality, Riz just dropped a whale sized weight on Fabian’s chest. It threatens to leave him breathless and not in a good way. 

Fabian revs the engine instead, letting the purr drown out his thoughts. “Don’t say stuff like that, Riz.” He says under his breath, before taking off down the road. He isn’t going to start thinking about this right now.

They are almost to Basrar’s when Riz shouts over the wind, “Oh hey, Fabian! Do you want to come over to the office after practice?” 

Fabian smiles. “Cracking another case, The Ball?” 

“You know it!” Fabian can practically hear the smile in his voice. “I always need someone to hold my string.”

Fabian feels the laughter bubble from his chest. “Yes, one of my many talents. Fabian Aramais Seacaster, holder of string!”

“It’s extremely crucial to my casework!” Riz adds. “I couldn’t solve them without it!”

Fabian feels Riz’s arms tighten around him and he lets out another laugh, pulling into Basrar’s. 

---

They walk into the cool air of the shop and see Gorgug sitting at a booth in the corner. He waves to them as they approach.

“Hey guys!” Gorgug greets, giving them a toothy grin. He’s hunching over, like always, with a pink milkshake in his hand. He always ordered strawberry with extra whipped cream.

“Hey Gorgug!” Riz greets, letting Fabian take the window seat. “Dude, I gotta tell you about this show I’ve been watching. It’s awesome.” 

“Oh yeah?” Gorgug says, sipping his milkshake. “Zelda’s been looking for more shows to watch, cause you know, all her parents watch is like those crazy reality TV shows.”

Fabian watches as Basrar floats over to their table. “Boys! Good to see you, and so early in the morning too. What can I get you?” 

Riz orders a weird concoction of chocolate mint, coffee, and pistachio ice cream topped with gummy bears and chocolate drizzle. Fabian never understood why the gummy bears had to be added to it, something that Riz no doubt picked up from Fig. The gummy bears become hard as rocks because the ice cream makes them too cold, but he’s been friends with Riz long enough to know he would eat almost anything. And so, Fabian orders a simple banana split with caramel sauce.   

By the time their ice cream gets here, Riz is already waist deep in the intricate world building of the tv show he’s been watching. The thing about Riz is that whenever he got really excited about something, he’d explain it so fast he’d have to keep back tracking and then return to his previous thought. It could get a bit confusing at times, but the Bad Kidz, at least Fabian, didn’t mind. They just made sure to ask a lot of questions. 

"Here's the real catch, though. It wasn't the butler, but it was actually--" Riz gets cut off by his crystal ringtone buzz loudly on the table. He grabs it immediately and presses it to his ear. A few moments pass before he says, "Mom? What's going on?"

Fabian immediately sits up straighter before Riz holds his hand out. "I'll be right back." He mouths to them, scooting out of the booth. Fabian watches as he walks out of Basrar's.

Gorgug plays with the straw of his milkshake for a moment."So… how are you and Aelwyn doing?" He asks innocently, because Gorgug would never ask a question he didn't want the answer to. Fabian suddenly feels a little sick, putting his spoon down.

"It-- uh, well--" Fabian is tripping over himself now. He hates when he gets like this. His thoughts race through his head and try to force themselves out his mouth all at once before he can even think of what to say.

"I--I get it, if that's like--" Gorgug stumbles a bit. "Too private or something, I just, you know, was wondering."

"No, no, it's fine, Gorgug. We just… broke up a few weeks ago."

"Oh." He says simply. "Why didn't you…"

"Say anything?" Fabian finishes for him. "I guess it was somewhat embarrassing."

"Embarrassing? Did she break up with you?" 

Fabian shrugs. "No, it was more mutual, if anything." He starts playing with his ice cream now, getting spoonfuls of caramel sauce and pouring it back into the bowl over and over again.

"Then why would you be embarrassed?" Gorgug presses. "I mean, my parents would say that's pretty mature."

"It just wasn't what I-- We? Expected it to be." Fabian admits. It feels weird to say it out loud after it's been rattling in his head for weeks. "I guess, maybe I expected it to be like you and Zelda. Two matches made in nerd heaven." 

"You know, not every relationship is gonna be perfect, Fabian." Gorgug reminds him. "Zelda and I get along great, sure, but that doesn't mean I don't fuck up every now and then or that I never get upset with her." He shrugs. "But that's a part of like, I don't know, loving someone. You guys kinda just get to figure stuff out together." 

"I guess Aelwyn and I never really tried figuring anything out together."

"Maybe you just expected too much from each other." Gorgug shrugs again. "Cause, you can't only love the best version of someone, you know?" 

Fabian opens his mouth to speak, but before he can, the front door jingles and Riz makes his way back to the booth.

"Sorry about that guys." Riz says, sitting back in the booth next to Fabian. "My mom needed to know where I put the law books I borrowed from her last weekend. Where was I?"

Gorgug responds, but not before casting a reassuring glance at Fabian. "Uh… I think you were about to tell us who the killer was, right?" 

Fabian can't tell if Riz notices and adds, "Oh yes, something about how it wasn't the butler?"

"Right, right!" He says excitedly. "Okay, so…"

He continues telling them about the tv show, which Fabian doesn’t mean to tune out of, but he can’t stop himself from thinking about Aelwyn. 

Their breakup had been mutual. They quickly realized that they simply weren’t compatible with one another. Fabian wishes he didn’t take it hard, but Aelwyn was technically the first girlfriend he ever had, and his first kiss.

Fabian was supposed to go straight to Fallinel, take on the Elven army and break Aelwyn out of imprisonment in a feat of gorgeous heroism. Which, if you left some parts out and moved a few things around, he did, technically. But then Aelwyn was supposed to be so impressed with his prowess that they would start dating, eventually get married out on the sea and then have beautiful children, born out of both Aelwyn and his exceptional talents. 

At least, that’s what he told himself. 

But when they actually got together, Fabian realized that he didn’t understand Aelwyn at all, and she didn’t understand him. They had both been through copious amounts of stress during sophomore year, with Aelwyn having to adjust to a new life without her parents, and Fabian having to grapple with the events of Leviathan and his own residual fears. It was just too much for them to sort out together, too many parts of themselves that they didn’t understand, so how could they ask the other to?

“You have this version of me built in your head, Fabian.” Aelwyn said to him. “Maybe, before all of this, I could have been that person for you. But, I’m not even sure who I am right now.” 

And he agreed with her, and that was that. 

Their crystals all buzz on their table, and Fabian reaches over to check the message.

figgy pudding: Hey losers, where you guys at? 

He types back. 

fabian: Basrar’s, be there soon.

“I guess that’s our cue, huh.” Gorgug says, gathering the dishes onto the table, like he always does. “Make sure to text me the name of that show, Riz, so I won't forget.”  

“Will do.” Riz replies, already sending the text to Gorgug. He gets up from the booth to let Fabian out and turns to him. “You ready to go?”

From the way Riz is looking at him, he can’t help but feel like he’s asking a different question, but he brushes past it. “Yeah, of course.” 

---

"Is something wrong?" Riz asks that night, because Riz is too perceptive for his own good and Fabian acknowledges that he hasn't said a word to him in over 10 minutes. “You were kinda acting weird today.” 

"Hm? Oh it's nothing, The Ball. Don't worry about it. What were you saying?" Fabian replies, sitting up a little straighter. 

They are sitting in Riz's office, with it's stale mugs of coffee and scattered evidence. If this was anyone else's office, Fabian would hate being here. Sometimes, Riz is so deep in a mystery it becomes cramped with case files and boxes, but it always feels good to be in a space that is truly lived in. It’s nothing like home, and maybe that’s why Fabian likes it. 

"You can talk to me, you know." Riz says, taking the red string Fabian's been playing with out of his hands. He pins a photo up on his corkboard.

Fabian doesn't respond. He knows he should, but at this moment, talking to his best friend seems like one of the hardest things he can do.

Riz notices this, and looks at him. "I know how you get. We don't have to talk about it." He runs a hand through his hair. "You, uh-- wanna watch a movie, maybe?"

Fabian blinks at him for a moment before replying, "You want to take a break?"

Riz laughs at that. "Come on, Fabian. I'm not that bad."

Fabian scoffs. "Please, you almost missed homecoming because you were here piecing together your clues." He gestures to the corkboard.

"And then I closed that case the same weekend." Riz says proudly, puffing up his chest a bit. 

Fabian smiles, then makes the mistake of looking down at the floor beneath them. He runs his fingers over the scratch marks carved into the wood. 

He tried to call and Riz didn’t pick up. Riz never ever misses his calls and his ringer is always on, so why wasn’t he--

Riz’s eyes go from soft to panicked almost immediately. “Hey, don’t do that.” He tells Fabian, pushing his hands away from the floor. “I, uh-- still need to get someone to fix those.”

“I could get someone to do it.” Fabian says immediately. Riz shakes his head.

“You know I wouldn’t let you.” 

“But I could.” 

“Fabian, it wasn’t your fault.” 

And when Riz says this, Fabian lets out a breath of air. 

Because he knows, deep down, the situation with Riz last year wasn’t his fault. But maybe if he had been a better friend and called more, or came around the office more, or had just been there when it happened... then Riz wouldn’t have to pay someone to replace his floorboards. Maybe, he wouldn’t have such a hard time looking at himself in the mirror.

“You aren’t the only one who fails, Fabian.” Riz continues, seemingly reading his thoughts. He sighs. “Y--You do this thing where you think you are the only person in the world who can do anything. The only person who can save the princess in the tower, the only person who can kill your father’s rival, like you are trying to hold the whole world up on your shoulders because you are Fabian Aramais Seacaster. And I get it, you know? I’ve had some pretty big shoes to fill myself.” He lets out a short laugh. “But, you don’t have to… prove yourself to me. Or to-- uh, anyone, really.”

“Riz, I--” Fabian’s words fail him, because figuring things out was always Riz’s job. He knows he will pay to get Riz’s floors done, because maybe Fabian didn’t have to prove himself to anyone, but as well as being a Seacaster, he was also Riz Gukgak’s best friend, and that he needed people to know. 

“It’s okay, Fabian, really it is.” Riz says, interrupting him. “I’m not gonna lie, you haven’t always been-- uh, a perfect friend. I know I haven’t either.” He shrugs. “But you always try to be, and that means more to me than you probably know.” 

Fabian reaches over and pulls Riz into the tightest hug he’s given since he got out of the Forest of the Nightmare King. He feels Riz tense up at first, but then his arms wrap around his neck. 

“You are my best friend.” Fabian says into Riz’s shirt, because if he doesn’t say this now the flames that stir inside his chest will burn the words to ash before they reach his mouth. It was easier to say when Riz wasn’t staring back at him, picking him apart. A habit that Riz could never shake, but sometimes, Fabian welcomed it. He didn’t have to say much, because Riz always just seemed to understand. 

Fabian has never had a best friend before. His family sailed so often when he was younger that it was hard to make friends with any of the kids. He was constantly being pulled out of school and thrown into the next. Every time he did so he would play his little charade of being Fabian Aramais Seacaster, impressing the children in his class, and then his family set sail once again.

Near the end of freshman year, Riz pulled Fabian aside to thank him for the briefcase and the business cards. Fabian had brushed it off, saying it wasn’t that big of a deal, but it took him hours to hand write all those business cards. Something that, to this day, Fabian still hasn’t told Riz. 

After that, Riz never stopped calling him his best friend, and Fabian quickly realized that Riz is one of the only people who had ever really tried to be his friend. He denied it at first, but eventually he came to accept it as a fact. 

And maybe it was the same for Riz too. Like Fabian, he didn’t like talking about personal issues. It wasn’t until sophomore year when Riz was finally able to talk about his dad in front of everyone. And much like Fabian and his own charade, he much preferred his role as a detective versus a teenage boy trying to figure the world out. 

But that was just it, wasn’t it? Because maybe, they could be two teenage boys trying to figure out the world together. 

And so, Fabian may not write his name upon the world. Every living being in Spyre may not know the name Fabian Aramais Seacaster, but he is okay with this. 

Because Fabian doesn’t always need to be the hero, the knight who saves the princess, or the son who kills his father’s rival. Because even when he’s not the hero, there are people who still love him. And to be a part of a story that continues to write itself, that is bigger than his own, with Riz and the rest of the Bad Kidz?

Fabian couldn’t think of anything else he would rather do. 

[thefanficmonster]

You Never Notice

Sykkuno x Reader (Female)

Warnings: None

Genre: Fluff

Summary: The center of someone’s world is never aware of their importance even when everyone else is in the know. People are hard to understand, no denying, but if we all spilled our truth like how Y/N admitted her feelings to Sykkuno, mutual understanding would be achieved a lot more easily. JK, she needed an eternity and maybe a thousand pushes. What’s important is the result though, right?

Requested by Anon. You are my first Sykkuno request and I wish I could thank you with a tag. Instead, I’m gonna thank you with a fic in which I put my all. Thank you for the request, hope the final product doesn’t let you down. 🥰

Here we go again. Sykkuno’s love life is brought up. This time it’s more frustrating cause I can’t shout how wrong he is about himself and the effect he has on the people around him. He has no room to speak, he hasn’t experienced what I have - one of your best friends living in your head rent-free because you’re just that whipped by them. That’s right kids, some of us never grow past the middle school crushes - they are a constant for some. That can be a good or a bad thing, it completely depends on how you view it.

Currently, him and Rae are addressing some dating rumors that started spreading about them earlier this week while Felix, Sean and I are kicking each other’s butts in Party Animals. We’re not all playing together, actually, we were all playing different games when we hopped into the call and just grouped together after playing solo got boring. Rae and Sykkuno are playing Among Us on a random server, her being the only person who’s streaming right now. She said she just wanted to clear up the dating rumors cause they were annoying to see popping up on her feed on every social media platform she’s active on.

“It’s ridiculous, really. People just look for online personalities to put in imaginary relationships. Are they that bored? I know quarantine is getting to everyone, but damn“ Rae says, laughing a bit to take the edge off her words but I know she’s bothered by this ordeal more than she’s letting on. I know how much it bothers her when people ship random youtubers and streamers together, even when she’s not involved. 

And I agree. Ever since I started streaming I’ve been shipped with my friends left and right. First Corpse, then Dave, Joel...you name them. It gets kinda gross cause these people are legit like siblings to me. Unlike Rae, though, I don’t waste my breath trying to clear those ‘talks of the net’ up. I don’t know if it’s for better of for worse that I remain silent on the issue when I’m involved but am willing to stand up for my friends when they find themselves in a similar situation. Some people think the reason I don’t share my thoughts is because the rumors are true, but the hint is most often taken, resulting in the ship ending. Well, that ship ending, there’s always a new one popping up. As Rae said, it’s ridiculous.

“Why does everyone think I am ever dating anyone? I’ve already commented on this: no one would date me.“ Sykkuno says through a sigh-like laugh.

“Why are you so sure?“ I blurt out without as much as a second thought

My eyes widen just a bit, just a bit. I’m not too surprised with myself. I am slowly losing control of my raging emotions and I’m afraid of what I’ll turn into when all my restraints snap. A mess, that’s the most likely answer.

“Well....“ Sykkuno trails off, clearly more than a little nervous, “I don’t have a girlfriend right now, and I haven’t had one in a while...Nor has a girl shown any interest to be more than friends with me in what feels like forever.“

“I’m sure you just don’t notice the hints girls drop. We can be pretty subtle.“ I try to sound as nonchalant as possible while I’m still in my panicked animal mode. And by animal I mean a cub. A scared cub that is now showing confidence but will run and hide right afterwards. I silently thank the universe that I’m not streaming right now. I can feel the heat on my neck and cheeks which is pure embarrassment and would have been more than evident on-camera.

“Yeah Y/N’s right, Sykkuno. Girls can be very subtle, but they will always let you know if they like you, even through the smallest of gestures. You gotta keep your eyes open.“ Rae backs me up reassuringly.

“Guys never notice anything.“ I say, rolling my eyes. I feel the pressure lessen thanks to Rae’s involvement in the conversation.

“That’s not true.“ Sean protests, “We pay close attention, especially to girls we are attracted to.“

“Yeah!“ Sykkuno pipes in again, “I’m pretty sure I would notice if a girl was dropping signals that she likes me.“

Now that stings. That legit makes me wince and cringe as though his voice delivered an actual physical hit to my chest and stomach. It’s really unpleasant, painful even.

“You never notice.“ There’s something about this triple opportunity - proving him wrong that he’d catch onto a girl’s signals; proving him wrong that girls aren’t attracted to him; coming clean about the biggest emotional struggle I’ve experienced in recent years; - that snaps my last emotional restraints. I will totally regret this later, but after the regret comes the relief which is 100% worth it. 

“What?“ He sounds very puzzled. I can just about imagine him frowning as he tries to wrap his brain around something even I can’t wrap mine around.

“You say you’d notice a girl’s hints of attraction. OK.“ I nonchalantly throw Felix off the submarine in Party Animals while I keep talking, “Would you notice if a girl purposely doesn’t kill you in Among Us when she’s impostor? Or would you notice that a girl always sends you links to videos she finds funny? Or that she always shares music and movie recommendations with you and you only?“ 

Dead silence ensues. I feel like they have all glitched, considering Sean didn’t even try to put up a fight when I lifted him and threw him in the ocean as I previously did with Felix’s avatar.

Maybe I was a tad too specific and made the whole situation hit a little too close to home for me. 

Sykkuno and I have become really close friends and we chat and play games regularly. As I mentioned, I give him movie and music recommendations and I only recently started acknowledging the fact that I’ve never killed him in Among Us. Natural instinct I guess. In fact, I feel the need for vengeance when he’s killed. I refuse to even vote for him unless it’s absolutely necessary.

Now that I think about it, it’s not his fault he has no clue. I just don’t know how to properly drop hints.  

“Um...I mean, I guess I would notice but I’d never think they are that type of hints.“ He finally replies.

On point there, dear. On damn point.

“What does it take for you to be convinced that a girl is into you?“ Who cares that a bunch of people are about to witness this outpour? It’ll make it more real, yes, but it will also help me believe that it happened so I don’t try to crawl back to the point where return is an option. No return now. You’ve already passed two thirds of the way. The last one will set you and your mind free. 

“The only way I can be sure is if she tells me, really.“ He sounds so nervous and shy, like he’s trying to draw as little attention as possible.

He doesn’t have to worry. I’m about to pull all the attention on me.

“Well in that case....you leave me no other choice.“ My screen displays me as the winner of this round of Party Animals - an easy one considering my friends are glitched in real life. “I like you, Sykkuno. I like you a lot. And I know you will see it from every context except the one its meant to be in so I’ll be even more head-on - I’ve liked you, as more than a friend for quite some time now, but buddy, you can be sooo oblivious sometimes. Anyway...“ Here’s that regret I was talking about, it’s already creeping in. “Don’t feel the need to say it back. I don’t wanna hear it if you don’t mean it. And Rae,“ I can’t help but laugh at the thought, “Sorry for making your chat go crazy. Peace!“

And I disconnect from the Discord call.

“See? That wasn’t so hard, was it?“ I say out loud, staring at my desktop. “The cat’s out of the bag and you can move on now.“

I push myself to get some work done in order to get my mind off the mess I’ve created. I’m afraid of thinking about it, I know I’ll get too upset to do anything with the rest of my day if I do.

Suddenly, just as I’m about to open my email, my phone chimes. My brain doesn’t bother to stop my arm from automatically reaching out and checking the notification. A message.

From Sykkuno.

~ I knew you didn’t suggest me ‘My Best Friend’s Wedding’ for no reason

Me ~ So...?

~ So, I’m not the only oblivious one here, Y/N

Me ~ Wait WHAT?

~ ‘Nick And Norah’s Infinite Playlist’?

Me ~ Oooohhhh...I see

It takes him a few seconds to reply, the bubble with the three bouncing dots popping up and disappearing a few times now. I just now feel my heart banging against the inside of my ribcage, my pulse echoing in my ears.

He did seem a little too eager for me to watch that movie...

~ So, movie date?

I laugh, wholeheartedly and honestly. Genuine joy running through my veins.

Me ~ So it is.

The grin that is now decorating my features promises to stay there for the rest of the day. I bite my bottom lip at the thought that pops into my head.

Me ~ Phew, I can stop sparing you in Among Us from now on

He sends me three cry-laughing emojis in return, but I don’t need those. I can just imagine him laughing as he usually does with one hand covering his mouth. And here I thought my grin couldn’t grow wider.

 Imagining him happy makes me smile. His happiness makes me happy. He makes me happy.

Even better...

I think the feeling’s mutual.

[spotofimagines]

Rivals Last ~ Jadon Sancho

A/N: So I had this in my drafts before he signed with man united but that's fine, we move, we adapt. A third piece for the @footballffbarbiex summer challenge. Hope you enjoy it :)

Warnings: none - reader is female

Summary: You love both your brothers dearly, but being in the football world with them can make some things a little complicated.

gif by @archivesbvb - gif by @ermuellert - gif by @italynt

Being a footballer meant living in a special world. Being in a footballing family meant living in a special world too. Being the younger sister of Lucas and Theo Hernandez meant living in a really special world. But nobody told you just how crazy it would be for all three of those things to apply to you.

You truly love watching your older brothers play football. They teach you something new during every match you see; even though you play as a striker, their movements and handling of the ball always inspire you to play better. After all, it was their defensive skills that helped you become a good goal scorer growing up since they never let a tackle go unchallenged in the park and you had to find out how to manoeuvre around them. A lot easier said than done.

Currently Lucas is signed with Bayern Munich. In his time there so far, he has learnt the heritage, history, and importance of wearing the badge and defending its honour in every match they play, especially derbies. Having supported Lucas, it quickly became easy for you to support Bayern Munich too and celebrate their victories like it was your own team. You'd always managed to do it with the clubs both your brothers played for, letting the atmosphere of the fanbase carry you away.

You have just finished your second season in England with Manchester City women's team. You'd settled in nicely now, having learnt a lot of the English language and culture already. The experience was made so much easier because of the help given by your welcoming teammates and the staff that translated things into French and Spanish during your first months there.

Fans were a little disappointed during the 2019 summer transfer window when it was confirmed all three Hernandez siblings would be leaving Spain to play separately in England, Germany and Italy, joking that no one could know what might happen with you all so far away. However, to you, it made things easier, as Lucas and Theo would stop making so many awful jokes about each other's clubs, only to join forces to diss your club even more afterward. Now the only connection you have to the clubs you all play for is the want for your sibling to win with them. And it is a great feeling. A welcome change of pace.

But no new change to your life felt as good as your blossoming "relationship", situationship, whatevership, you have with Jadon Sancho.

It all started with you flirting back and forth on social media, which turned itself into countless hours of DMs no one else could see. You congratulated his goals and he congratulated your wins. All the light-hearted teasing and the warm-hearted compliments stayed in your own little bubble. The only thing peeking out was your silly inside rule that if you were going to comment on a post, it had to be emojis only, stretching to a few words if you really couldn't help yourself - but it would earn you taunts from the other for the rest of the night.

Some eagle-eyed fans noticed how you'd been liking each other's posts every time they appeared for a while now, but it just added to the fun and thrill you got from flirting with him so much.

You weren't meant to be forming a bond with Jadon. He played for your brother’s rival. He was supposed to be the enemy. Someone you should dislike with a snap of your fingers. Certainly not a boy to fall for like you have.

You couldn't help yourself. Lucas and Theo had helped you since you moved to England by being the steady rocks they always were, cheering you on from afar. Your new teammates had helped you since you moved to England by introducing fun things for you all to do together and taking you under their wings. But Jadon had helped you in a different kind of way. He gave you a new kind of comfort and reassurance when you talked. He became someone to turn to with all your interesting news and your curious problems. He told you the good places to visit around the city that he remembered from his time there and taught you English slang to make your teammates laugh. You spoke three languages to varying degrees now, and you'd managed to pick up more German vicariously through Lucas in two years faster than Jadon had done living in Germany in four years, so you'd clue him into rude German phrases you had asked Lucas about, alongside the French and Spanish swear words he used more often than English ones now when you text. 

Even though a language barrier comes up once in a while, you have both learnt behaviours from each other and crave the contact you share. Jadon was starting to drop everything to send replies to you, a change his teammates have noticed and jokingly mock him for. Little did they know the unknown girl they joke he is smitten over is the sister of their rival.

Theo is the one in your family you usually tell about the boys you go out with; boyfriends and dates have been shared with him since you were 13 and doting on your first crush. He does the same with his girlfriends; asking advice and telling you more than you need to know at times. So, when you all went home for a bit of family time around Christmas, nothing could stop him from noticing the tell-tale signs that you had something going on. He already figured out through persistence that it was another player you were getting involved with, and his insistent questioning hasn't stopped in his search for who the player is.

But you keep it hidden from Lucas, and you don't know when you'll tell him. He has been your protector since you were kids, comforting you on sad nights when no one else was there, teaching you little secrets about how to navigate through the world, he even punched a boy who teased you once at school. The idea of telling him you were chatting romantically to another player would be trouble enough, but telling him it was a Dortmund player might just end up in another schoolground incident. You hadn't wanted Theo to know for fear he'd go dishing your dirt to Lucas, but he discovered it on his own and there was nothing you could do.

Who knows what might become of this thing you have with Jadon, and lord knows your eldest brother owns a hard as nails death stare that just might do Jadon in, but for now you actually quite like having the secret. A little mystery tucked away up your sleeve.

The rush you always get when Lucas calls your phone as you're typing a text to the Englishman,  feeling as though the first words from the other end will be shouts of how he knows everything and he'll never speak to you again for keeping it a secret, fills you with dread at times. But it never is the reason he calls, and it turns out he is just making plans or has something funny to tell you. But the way your heart thumps as you go back to texting Jadon, that is part of the chase you have to admit you enjoy.

Hardcore fans online have noticed the past few months that when you do interviews in English, the odd slang term comes up during jokes - terms you hadn't used before and stem more from London boroughs than northen towns - so speculation of how you'd learnt these things easily coincided with dating rumors.

Lucas had seen the speculation online; seen fans trying to put your interactions with the Dortmund player together through both your instagram stories and comments and the tweets you both had liked about the other. Lucas had even grown suspicious of the little questions you asked him about Germany, German phrases and his lifestyle there, not knowing why you would need nor want to know those things. But Lucas doesn't believe it. He knows that you know better to mix with a Dortmund boy.

Sometimes an older brother just doesn't get it quite right…

Soon, the chance will come to really see if your connection is something you can build on. Jadon's new signing with Manchester United has been confirmed and he will be moving back to England. It is a great opportunity to get to see him more often, rather than the odd rendezvous point or clandestine trip during small breaks in the season. You'll spend more time face to face instead of over the phone. You'll get to wake up in his bed and him in yours, without needing to sneak away from hotel rooms afterwards. You'll maybe even get to go on a proper date, just the two of you, where you can flirt across the table your joined hands rest upon. Hanging out with Jadon won't be the first time you've spent time together in person. However, getting a full day with only the two of you where you won't have to pretend you hardly know who he is, and you won't have to pretend your eyes aren't meeting across the group of people you're in - it fills your stomach with knots and butterflies.

A certain pressure has fallen off you now Jadon has no growing rivalry with Lucas, but not completely. You won't be able to take back the way their teams made the other feel in the past, but the fact there won't be more of it next season comforts you a little. The biggest thing that will hold you back from going public before the new season starts will be the media, but that is an issue you can't even begin to worry about yet. You are too caught up in the excitement of being in the same town as Jadon to care. Rumours are spinning crazier than ever about you two as some of your liked tweets about his move got reposted by sports pages and fan blogs - now joking about him being your rival instead of your brother's - and yet it didn't stop you, no longer all that bothered about keeping a low profile now you both will be living away from Lucas. If he gets mad, all he will be able to do is shout down the phone, and whilst you never want that to happen, you know the time to flourish with Jadon and capitalise on the foundation you have already built is better than ever, brothers be damned.

There are big changes coming for the both of you, yet one thing will remain the same no matter the outcome of your relationship. You can't quite stop being football rivals.

[miraculouscontent]

what happened with optigami??

Ugh happened.

- Episode begins with Nathalie in bed with a screen in front of her, and Gabriel sitting next to her and watching. It's explained to the audience through Nathalie what she and Gabriel have been up to since "Miracle Queen," since they learned the heroes' identities. The screen shows each hero and their civilian self, and Nathalie created a sentimonster called Optigami (a mechanical butterfly - think Tippi from Super Paper Mario but edgy) with eyes that can appear on the wings that can possess any object and record what it sees, transmitting it back to Nathalie's screen) to reveal Ladybug's secrets. Optigami stalked the civilians, but they were just teenagers who "spent their time at school or activities outside of it" (thanks, Captain Obvious).

- It's said that Ladybug still entrusts the civilians with miraculouses, but has rules to prevent them from discovering her identity (Wayzz is also shown on camera despite kwami not being visible via technology; magic, I guess???). Optigami has tried to follow Ladybug, but hasn't managed to catch her. Nathalie considers the sentimonster useless, but Gabriel has an idea, pointing out the vulnerability of civilians returning the miraculouses and suggesting Optigami hide there. Gabriel makes a plan for all the holders to appear and to have a supervillain that Ladybug will need another hero to beat.

- Cut to Audrey shouting at someone about glitter when she gets a call from Gabriel, who talks about a fashion icon award from her magazine that she should give to his son. Audrey agrees to send invitations right away.

- Marinette is shown in her room, staring at her invitation with a big smile because Adrien is on it. Alya explains to the kwami that everyone is invited to the event where Adrien will get an award and that's why Marinette has been frozen staring at the invite for the past ten minutes. The kwami talk about being invited too since "everyone" is invited, and Marinette snaps out of her trance to deny them; no owner, no trips. Trixx argues that he can go because he has Alya, but Marinette reminds him that she (Marinette) has the miraculous. Trixx tells her to give Alya the fox permanently. Alya agrees with this decision, especially now that she knows she's Ladybug, but Marinette insists that it's too risky and that one of the rules she's sticking to is to not give out any miraculouses. Trixx turns away in a huff, arms crossed, while Alya assures that it's fine because it's Marinette's decision and they have to leave now anyway. Marinette snaps back into her fawning state, staring at the invitation again.

- The students show up at the event, specifically Marinette (the only one who makes no sense), Adrien (who's there for the award), Alya (Rena Rouge), Nino (Carapace), Kagami (Ryuko), Luka (Viperion), Kim (Roi Singe), and Max (Pegase). No other students showed up. While they're heading for the elevator, Nino and Alya are doing something on a tablet and do a special high-five in celebration. Kim also uses the stairs instead of the elevator, insisting he'll be faster and telling Max to time him. After he charges up, Alya slides up to Marinette and talks about the elevator being perfect to get close to her "secret crush." Marinette, who was literally fine a second ago, starts freaking out at the idea of her and Adrien accidentally touching, bracing herself against the elevator's frame when Alya tries to forcefully shove her inside. The elevator closes without her and Marinette sighs, telling Alya that she doesn't want to rush it.

- People are starting to sit down for the event and Alya and Nino are doing their high-five again (which Marinette smiles sadly at). Audrey is impatient and demands to start filming, but Alec isn't back yet. Meanwhile, Optigami flies in and goes into an Adrien picture to hide, which makes Nathalie's screen light up on top of her bed. Nathalie informs Shadow Moth via earpiece that Optigami is in place.

- Alec is in the restroom playing on his phone. Shadow Moth places an amok in his staff and makes a sentimonster that looks exactly like Alec. The real Alec comes out and is confused, then cowers at Shadow Moth and the sentimonster Alec. SentiAlec leaves the restroom, showing over-dramatic flair as he jumps on stage. A few people are thrown off, but Audrey doesn't care and just wants to get started.

- The filming officially begins and everyone is shown watching the event. SentiAlec is barely into his introduction before he starts openly trashing Audrey (such as calling her outdated), which shocks Audrey and briefly makes Chloe laugh until Chloe catches Audrey glaring at her. SentiAlec adds a comment about the award ceremony being rigged, then isn't phased when Audrey starts to say he's fired. He finishes the line for her in a question tone, saying it's too late anyway as Audrey has already made a fool of herself. Audrey, ashamed and humiliated, then gets akumatized by an akuma Shadow Moth sends.

- At the appearance of Style Queen, Marinette and Alya give each other a look. Alya whispers to Nino that they should prepare in case Ladybug needs them, so the two slip off while Marinette goes in the other direction. SentiAlec still insults Style Queen, then flees when Style Queen tries to shoot him, managing to escape. Style Queen goes to shoot Adrien, but her arm is cut by a chair that Kagami throws. Kagami yells at Adrien to run and Adrien stands there and cries out, "Kagami, no!" Style Queen then fires at Kagami, turning her into glitter, and only then do Adrien and Chloe bail. Nathalie then informs Shadow Moth that Kagami (Ryuko) has been eliminated, and Shadow Moth says that they need to find the others before Ladybug arrives. Optigami flies out of the Adrien picture to go searching.

- Adrien manages to slip into an elevator to transform, but before he can, Marinette slips into the same one to transform, both stopping and Marinette having to make an excuse for saying "Tik--". Adrien presses a button and claims he was about to get help and Marinette says he's wonderful, though corrects it to "brave." The elevator doors close and Marinette says that Ladybug will come while Adrien says that Chat Noir will come too, though they both look away nervously afterwards.

- Chloe, meanwhile, pops out from behind a table to tell Style Queen where Alec went. Style Queen reminds Chloe that she'd laughed at her, then goes to shoot her. Chloe uses Zoe as a shield, but the shot causes Chloe to turn into glitter anyway, just alongside Zoe instead of Chloe alone. Nathalie informs Shadow Moth that Chloe is eliminated, then tells Optigami to find the others.

- Max is leading people downstairs to the nearest exit. Nathalie sees it through Optigami and informs Shadow Moth, who informs Style Queen, who makes a tornado of glitter to surround the building, turning the building itself glitter-encrusted with Style Queen's mug on top. This movement apparently knocks out the elevator's power, which sends Adrien and Marinette stumbling to the floor. The people that Max had been trying to lead out are approached by Style Queen, who shoots all of them. Max is eliminated.

- Both Adrien and Marinette try to reach for the elevator's buttons at the same time, their hands touching. Marinette apologizes sheepishly, then tries one of the buttons, but to no avail. They try to pull open the door, but it doesn't work. Marinette is sure that Chat Noir will save them, and Chat Noir agrees nervously, but also brings up Ladybug as an option. Marinette then texts Alya to tell her that she's stuck in an elevator. Alya texts back to ask if she's with Adrien, adding a wink emoji. Marinette responds that--yes, she is, and Alya becomes nervous.

- At the same time, Nino gets a text from Adrien that he's stuck in an elevator with Marinette. Nino thinks it's cool and Alya laughs nervously, pretending to agree. Alya asks Marinette over text how she's going to make this work, and Marinette says that she has a plan but needs to be alone. Alya tries to split from Nino, insisting that she'll give Ladybug a signal that they're there, but Nino wants to go with her. Alya insists, saying that it'll be better that they not get shot as a group, but Nino gives her the lovey dovey eyes and says that he won't let her do it by herself. Alya relents, but says that she has to go somewhere first ("if you know what I mean"), kissing Nino's cheek and then running off.

- SentiAlec returns and Shadow Moth gets rid of him. The real Alec escapes and smacktalks Shadow Moth when he's out of earshot, but Style Queen promptly shoots him. Shadow Moth then tells Style Queen that people are trying to escape into the events, so Style Queen turns into glitter and goes through, finding Luka (who's leading Mayhem carefully through the vents) and turning both of them to glitter, eliminating Luka Couffaine. This leaves three left: Kim, Alya, and Nino.

- Marinette calls the kwami using her phone, as there's a mini cell phone inside the Miracle Box. They all answer at once, which shocks Marinette as she throws the phone in shock, embarrassing her in front of Adrien asks who it is and Marinette makes a hurried excuse about talking to the fire department. She proceeds to act like she's really talking to said department, explaining the situation. Longg says that they're on their way and Marinette hurries to reject the idea, arguing that "helicopters (flying) are bad for the environment." She suggests "riding a horse" instead, and her voice is heard through the elevator and Style Queen picks it up, following after the voice. Optigami also possesses the elevator and spots Adrien and Marinette, with Marinette still repeating the horse comment, which finally makes the kwami realize that she means Kaalki. She's huffy about it, claiming that she's a noble steed - not a horse - and Marinette must mean Fluff. Sass agrees, as apparently horses and rabbits had a common ancestor. Fluff cheerfully talks about going to prehistory and Marinette shouts to deny it, grinning weakly at Adrien for how ridiculous she must sound. Adrien then notices the pair of eyes watching them and ushers Marinette away, shushing her. Marinette notices what Adrien does and ends the call.

- Style Queen opens the elevator doors and looks down at the elevator shaft to where Marinette and Adrien are. Marinette touches her miraculous anxiously and Adrien stares at his ring, internally debating with himself. They both turn at the same time, saying they have something to tell the other, but Nathalie notes that Optigami is only seeing Adrien together with Marinette, who isn't on their list. Shadow Moth discourages Style Queen from going after the elevator and Optigami leaves.

- Adrien sighs in relief, then asks Marinette what she wanted to tell him. Marinette insists it's nothing, asking what he wanted to say, and Adrien claims that he was just wondering what the eyes were. Marinette says she doesn't know, but that they should stay hiding and she'll text Alya to get help. Kim, meanwhile, has just gotten up the stairway, asking if he's won, and Style Queen happens to be right there, shooting him on the spot and eliminating him.

- Marinette sends Alya the kwamis' number and Alya calls it, hearing Trixx complaining on the other line about how Marinette should've let him come. At the same time, Alya gets a call from Nino that she has to reject, which worries Nino enough for him to try and slip up. Optigami happens to be in the extremely specific room and spot to see Nino, which Nathalie informs Shadow Moth of. Style Queen swoops by, turning Nino to glitter, and Shadow Moth gets an idea, making a SentiNino to lure out Alya.

- Alya is running down the stairs when she hears Nino calling her. At the same time, Kaalki pops in through a portal and encourages Alya to jump through. Alya runs in and the portal closes behind her, then she asks Kaalki about kwami using their powers without a holder and that leading to chaos. Kaalki insists that she never causes chaos - only contributes to the extraordinary - and the scene jumpcuts to the Eiffel Tower in the desert.

- Alya gets a text from Marinette, telling her to bring the bee miraculous. Alya taps in the code for the Miracle Box, then takes out the fox and bee. She transforms into Rena Rouge and makes an illusion of Ladybug to keep Style Queen busy, but hesitates as she looks back at the Miracle Box. She pulls out the turtle and Longg questions if Marinette asked her to do that, to which Alya insists that it's a precaution. Kaalki makes another portal and Rena runs through with both Kaalki and Ladybug, the scene jumpcutting to a gate-esque monument on the moon.

- Rena and Ladybug split up, but Rena stops when she hears Nino calling her. Optigami possesses the wall as Rena runs up to "Nino" (SentiNino) and shushes him. Nathalie informs Shadow Moth that Alya is already transformed and has a kwami with her, which shocks Shadow Moth (idk why Shadow Moth can't see that since it's his sentimonster but I've also given up on making sense of this episode at this point).

- Rena gives SentiNino the turtle miraculous. Shadow Moth, through SentiNino, asks why he's receiving it from Rena, and Rena explains that she's doing it for Ladybug while Ladybug defeats Shadow Moth. She tells SentiNino to transform and help her, then runs off. Nathalie mutters about how the only people who've given out miraculouses before were Ladybug and Chat Noir until now, and Shadow Moth deduces that Alya isn't an ordinary holder. Either way, he's not concerned about their plan, having SentiNino transform using the turtle. Optigami merges with the miraculous as well and SentiCarapace runs off.

- SentiCarapace enters the room where MirageLadybug is fighting Style Queen. Shadow Moth monologues (through SentiCarapace for some reason but no one can hear him anyway I guess) a bit about his victory and Ladybug having no idea what's about to happen, and then the scene cuts to Rena Rouge entering the elevator Adrien and Marinette are in via Kaalki.

- Rena Rouge explains that Ladybug sent her, then has Kaalki make another portal. Rena takes Adrien first, which allows Marinette to be alone. Tikki congratulates her on the idea and Marinette thanks her before transforming. Rena Rouge, meanwhile, drops Adrien off on a rooftop and tells him that she'll come back for him later. After she's gone, Adrien talks to Plagg about it being hard to get back into the building. Plagg suggests they go home and Adrien insists they can't yet. He transforms.

- Rena re-enters the elevator through another portal, promptly high-fiving Ladybug. Rena and Kaalki boast about the great job they've done, and Ladybug nervously asks how many times Kaalki's used her power. Kaalki admits she's used it a couple of times and Ladybug laments all the catastrophes that must've happened. The scene jumpcuts to a trail sinking into the ocean and a skyscraper sinking into a volcano, plus many more objects on the moon.

- Ladybug says that they can't waste more time. She puts on the bee and unifies, then the scene jumpcuts to the two suddenly in the room where Style Queen is fighting MirageLadybug. LadyBee congratulates Rena on her good job, then notices SentiCarapace on the other side of the room. She looks confused and Rena sheepishly suggests that they can never have enough help. LadyBee squints at her, but admits that she was right and Carapace will be very helpful. Rena slumps in relief.

- LadyBee spawns Lucky Charm and gets a compact mirror (same lucky charm as in "Pixelator," for reference). However, she doesn't notice anything inherently useful, and notes that she can defeat Style Queen without her lucky charm. She shrugs it off, since it doesn't matter how they defeat Style Queen, and just tells Rena to end her illusion. Rena has MirageLadybug hide behind a table, which Style Queen shoots and groans as she realize that Ladybug isn’t there.

- LadyBee goes up behind SentiCarapace, surprising him as she tells him that she needs him to protect her. Shadow Moth has SentiCarapace agree, then monologues to himself and "talks to LadyBee" (not really, he's just being a weirdo) about how he won't tell Style Queen anything and how nothing will stop him from winning.

- LadyBee goes in to attack Style Queen with Venom, ducking under tables and doing various maneuvers before jumping up in the air. Style Queen fires, but SentiCarapace protects her with Shellter long enough for LadyBee to fall within range. SentiCarapace drops Shellter just in time for LadyBee to stab Style Queen. She divides Pollen away, then breaks the objects and purifies the akuma. Style Queen de-akumatizes and Audrey looks at Ladybug, confused. Chat Noir is outside, about to Cataclysm the building, when the glitter effect vanished. Puzzled, Chat Noir awkwardly opens the door and runs inside.

- Audrey echoes Chloe's "ridiculous, utterly ridiculous" line as she walks off, and Ladybug sneaks the magical charm onto Audrey's hat. Chat Noir arrives at the scene and sees Ladybug, Rena, and Carapace, asking how they got in. Kaalki greets him and Ladybug apologizes, saying that she would've gotten him had she known his identity. He's not bothered and takes the opportunity to flirt. She banters back, then has to leave to get Rena's and Carapace's miraculouses. She tells Chat Noir to wait there, which he does.

- The three go to the roof and Rena comments on how easy it was to defeat Style Queen. Shadow Moth, through SentiCarapace, says that it's because she has good partners. They fist-bump, at which point Carapace and Rena de-transform. The two return their miraculouses and Ladybug notes that she didn't have to use her Lucky Charm, still finding it weird as she usually manages to defeat the villain with it. Shadow Moth, meanwhile, is ready for his place to go down.

- Ladybug presumes that she just needs the lucky charm to fix everything, then turns around while staring at the open compact mirror. Through the mirror, she sees Alya offer SentiNino a high-five, which he looks put off by before giving her a regular high-five in return (no, Alya doesn't react to this). Ladybug remembers their secret high-five from earlier, then turns and suddenly says that they have to be even more careful from now on. She reminds them that Shadow Moth knows the identity of some of the holders and is obviously using that information. She asks if that's right, getting in SentiNino's face and calling him Shadow Moth. She apologizes to Alya and explains that the Nino in front of them is a sentimonster. Nathalie insists that it's impossible for Ladybug to know and Shadow Moth wonders how she found out.

- Alya staggers back and collapses to her knees in shock, and Ladybug hurries off the room to yoyo herself into the room where Chat Noir is, where he's found eating a cookie. Ladybug tells him to detroy the object in her hand, but Chat notes that it's a miraculous. She tells him to trust her and Chat destroys it (since he never used his still-ready Cataclysm from earlier), which Optigami is forced out of. Nathalie gets a strong headache from this and Shadow Moth punches a restroom door in anger, monologuing about how he'll win one day and that SentiNino isn't needed anymore. He snaps his fingers and both SentiNino and Optigami disappear.

- Ladybug uses Miraculous Ladybug then, which fixes everything including the miraculous (weirdly, they only show Max and Kagami being restored; screw Luka and Kim I guess??). Nino also shows up on the roof to see Alya (no, I don't know how he knew she was there) to hug her, and Alya smiles before hugging back.

- Chat Noir and Ladybug hop a large distance away and Chat asks her how she knew there was a sentimonster in the miraculous. Ladybug thanks her lucky charm for it and says that it always shows her the right way (*shudders at "Chat Blanc" flashbacks*) even though she was briefly led astray. Chat Noir just hums in serious thought.

- Later, in Marinette's room, Alya laments that Shadow Moth almost demasked Ladybug because of her. She also admits that she shouldn't have taken Nino's miraculous. Marinette says that she's right - she did make a mistake - which is why she has to make a difficult decision. She tells Alya that the most important thing is to learn from one's mistakes, and thus she herself learned that she needs an ally to replace her if something ever happens. She takes Alya's hand, then puts the fox miraculous inside, closing Alya's fingers over it as she tells Alya to keep the miraculous with her at all times. Marinette adds that she'll also tell Alya everything she knows, and the two hug as Trixx brags to the other kwami that he's always right even when he's not.

- The episode seems to end at first, but then there’s a post-endcard scene where Gabriel sits on Nathalie’s bed and admits that they don’t know their enemies as well as they think. He notes that Alya seems to have a special position now that Ladybug is guardian, and talks about getting to know her better. The episode ends there.