#unpack your ableism

[suleikazuleika]

On this and every future Labor Day, don't forget us disabled workers.

[myfairstarlight]

Listen, as an ace person, I do love the ace Viktor headcanons. However that does not mean that man does not pull or is a virgin because may I remind you how in s1 his first instinct when Mel caught him and Jayce trying to sneak into Heimerdinger's lab is to go "wait a minute this isn't my bedroom" which implies:

He's done THAT before

He and Mel knew each other. He needed a reason that she would somewhat believe (though she didn't here, obviously, when the guy who almost got exiled is standing right there)

No shame whatsoever he knows he can get it and does

[the-moogle-of-your-nightmares]

one thing i really deeply wish is that i'd had access as a kid to the plural community and information that are more easily available today, instead of my first experience with plural community which both took it seriously and was nonjudgmental having been 10's era tul/pa.info lmao

[peanutbutterandbananasandwichs]

I would very much like to never see the words "goes psycho" used to describe Sam (usually in reference to mystery spot or S4) ever again please and thank.

[angorwhosebabyisthis]

me: i'll just write up a quick post about a couple simple things you could change about sdmi to fix the worst of the talking animal stuff. maybe a little disclaimer at the beginning about the Utopia Problem

me an hour later, 3k words into the post and still writing: ah lads not again

[mars-ipan]

i do love my family very dearly but the internalized ableism the men in here struggle with is. so much

[hikeyzz]

i'm not even gonna lie getting surgery reaaalllyyy brought out the ableism of everyone around me. people really think i can just will my body to heal faster and are pretty shocked to hear i haven't just woken up completely healed yet (it hasn't even been 72hrs since my surgery...). or they get suuuperrr uncomfortable seeing/knowing i'm in pain and there is nothing that will make the pain completely go away. it makes everyone squirm that i'm being honest and keep saying i am in pain and uncomfortable. all that's really needed is an acknowledgement, you don't have to go over the top "poor baby," but you also shouldn't cringe away and just say "i hate that you're in pain." none of us LIKE seeing our loved ones struggling or in pain or ill. BUT it's a very, very normal part of life. and to say you hate that someone is in pain makes the pain about YOU and YOUR discomfort, not the person who is actually experiencing the pain. now i have to console YOU that i'm going to be okay bc you let your emotions dominate your reaction to MY experience.

[kerryweaverlesbian]

This is old news for fans of the CWs the flash and presumably the rest of the extended arrowverse but this fucking crisis on earth x crossover across 4 shows having the WEDDING of TWO MAIN CHARACTERS that has had a season and a half of build up and a PROPOSAL of two DIFFERENT main characters from a DIFFERENT show all in SUPERGIRL. OF ALL PLACES. Which none of those 4 characters are from. Is INFURIATING!!!!!!

I bought the fucking DVD. I bought the goddamn DVD of season 4 of The Flash so I could watch all of the events of season 4 of The Flash and the important things that happened to the people in season 4 of The Flash such as. Say. Getting fucking married. So I watch season 4 episode 6 of The Flash and they say "next episode we are going to get married :)". And then I click on episode 7 and it is called Crisis on Earth X part 3 and I go that's weird. Well maybe this is just where The Flash joins the crossover. During their wedding. Because it would be crazy for them not to put the wedding of two main characters including THE titular Flash on the DVD. And Barry's cheerful little voice goes "previously on Crisis of Earth X" and it shows me a clip of their wedding.

So I go. Fuck you, for one. And for two okay I guess I will find???? Supergirl?? (ew) and watch them get married :3. And find that Supergirl is only streaming on fucking. NowTV. because nobody wants to watch Supergirl. To which I obviously don't have a subscription. So I am reduced to looking up "Barry and Iris wedding" on YouTube dot com of which there are only two scenes. Neither of which feature Cisco for more than a brief cut to him as best man. So what's even the point.

Anyway now I'm watching the DVD part 3 and I am once again asking where is Cisco. Why am I seeing conflicts between Supergirl's sister and (?) A guy from Legends? Or maybe he's a new guy from Earth X? And then cutting from them to an old guy and the guy who had to ask what a pink triangle represented on a human person in a concentration camp (jesus christ?????? Why are they tackling this?????????). And THEN to MORE people from different shows. I haven't seen someone from the Flash for 5 scenes in a row let alone had them be a main character in the scene. Where are MY friends from THE FLASH. The Flash, the show I bought the DVD for!!!! SO I COULD WATCH THE FLASH!!!

Like surely. The appeal of crossovers are to show "here is how the people you already like hang out with people from other shows you either already like, or could like, if you give it a chance". This isn't letting me get to see any of that.

It is nice to see Snart again though. And oh he's a man loving man?? that's nice. Why did they make this like this. Why didn't they put all the episodes on my DVD 😭

[grayve-mistake]

Not a big c.s. lewis fan but I just think this quote really applies here

This was an interesting article to read. I think it's a little simple but still fun to skim thru.

[infiniteglitterfall]

psycho delulu sociopathic narcissist insults

You know, Tumblr is the first place I ever saw people saying:

"Stop using psychotic as an insult. I have psychosis and it just means I have auditory/visual hallucinations.

"I know they're not real. It doesn't mean I know less than you. It doesn't mean I understand less than you. It doesn't make my opinions worth less than yours. It doesn't make me worth less than you."

This was really, really helpful when my bff-since-kindergarten told me about having psychosis. I knew what that was. I could skip right past the whole rack of panicked ableist assumptions.

But it clearly hasn't spread as far as it should.

And lately, I've seen people bringing back the R word, along with calling people "delulu" and "psycho" and all the other shit above.

There's always some level of debate about whether it matters if people use ableist terms. The debate basically boils down to, "I don't care what they call me, I care how they treat me. We need people to stand up for our rights and support us, not to get hung up on vocabulary and ignore our actual lives."

And sure. It's like any slur. If a cis person is really supportive and respectful of me, I'm not that worried about whether they use my pronouns correctly or whether they know all the right trans terms.

But on the flip side: often the only thing I know about someone is whether they're throwing around slurs and ignoring pronouns, or speaking about us respectfully.

If you call me "delulu" because I tell you something you don't want to believe, or "psycho" for disagreeing with you politically, what you're telling me is:

You're so sure you're right about everything, you think disagreeing with you should be a diagnosable mental illness.

You don't believe people with certain disabilities.

(Yes, even if you're disabled. Yes, even if you're mentally ill. Plenty of people with less stigmatized mental illnesses, or other disabilities, still buy into the stigmas around personality disorders, schizophrenia, intellectual disabilities, developmental disorders, cerebral palsy, and communication disorders, and probably others I didn't think of.)

You think of people with certain disabilities as automatically understanding and reasoning less than you, to the point that it's fine to openly dismiss anything they say.

You think of people with certain other disabilities as inherently being Bad People.

You're so comfortable in those assumptions that when anyone disagrees with you on an issue you feel strongly about, you assume they're either incapable of understanding and reasoning, or they're a Bad Person. And you automatically use the diagnostic labels you associate with those things to dismiss them.

I don't think people realize how much they're revealing about themselves when they use these things as insults.

It's like any bias we pick up from the world around us. We have to actually do the work to notice it, unpack it, and unlearn it.

I hope that this post can encourage people to do more of that work around ableism.

[hyperlexichypatia]

At some point I have to unpack and describe the specific intersection of factors that led to my specific experiences with food shaming (and all related topics like sizeism, ableism, neurobigotry, healthism, ageism, etc).

As a a fat, autistic, ARFID-ite who's consistently been treated as younger than I am, and with scandalously non-abusive parents (how dare they vaguely accept me as I am without beating me into submission!), a lot of the food shaming I've experienced in my life was based on treating me more as a "spoiled child" than as a "fat woman," even after I was clearly the latter.

Food with my extended family or parents' friends or anyone older than myself was always a site of shaming how spoiled I was, how overly permissive my parents were, how rude I was for not eating what I was served (specifically for that -- I wasn't actually doing any "rude things" like commenting negatively on the food, demanding alternate food, or anything like that! But simply not eating what I was served, as a Young Person, was "rude".)

I was also heavily desexualized and somewhat degendered, so it wasn't "You're an unsexy woman because you're fat and ugly, not thin and sexy like a woman should be," it was "You're a spoiled brat picky eater who needs a spanking." Up through age. Like. 24.

And I realize, please believe me, I am very well aware of what an incredibly privileged problem this is. I was stigmatized because my parents weren't abusive? What kind of problem is that? Everyone else was dealing with actual problems, like actual abusive parents!

So my point isn't to complain about my problems, it's to say that food-shaming takes many forms. I was reminded of that when I saw an otherwise good, innocuous post about getting along with family at Thanksgiving, that included something about "Don't ask teens if they have a boyfriend/girlfriend, ask them about their hobbies, or what they're most looking forward to on their plate!" and I was suddenly filled with anxiety, because, no, don't do that. If you had asked Teenage Me what I was most looking forward to on my plate, I would have assumed that you were admonishing me for only having two foods on it, lecture me about how I can't have dessert if I don't eat my vegetables, nagging me to "Just try it," and possibly throwing in some remark about "Back in my day, if we didn't eat what we were told, we got a whipping!" Questions about my nonexistent love life would have been comparatively less fraught.

Don't comment on people's food choices. Don't comment on kids' food choices. Don't comment on teens' food choices. Don't comment on adults' food choices. Don't comment on people's food choices.

Don't ask teens if they have a boyfriend/girlfriend either, although, if that tradition must continue, I'd at least like to add age balance to it. If you ask a 15 year old if she has a boyfriend, she should legally be allowed to ask you how your divorce is coming.

[damagedcoda6669]

this is stupid

lets talk about this dumb ask for a minute. (leaving them anonymous so they dont get SLAUGHTERED)

ive gotten a handful of comments on my youtube video accusing me of the exact same things, so im gonna use this as an opportunity to teach you HOW NOT TO ACT TOWARDS CREATORS ONLINE. first of all, my financial situation is NONE of your business. i will establish that i pay rent, i have an income, i help synni out financially, but i dont owe you ANY of that information. making an assumption about my private life and then using said assumption to demonize me is exactly the kind of behavior exhibited by the internet growing up which ruined my childhood. you are making an assumption about me and using it to victimize synni and demonize me, two people who you have NEVER MET and in reality you know next to NOTHING about. stop making me out to be the bad guy in every situation, it goes to show that you have learned nothing from my video and are continuing the cycle of birdie hate for no good reason.

second of all, this is fucking ableist. assuming im mooching off of my best friend and being lazy because i happen to be disabled and mentally ill? fuck off. there is no "you need to get your act together" youre not my fucking parent, and also??? i need to get my act together??? you mean stop being disabled??? wtf are you on about??? synni chooses to vent about her financial situation, but i choose to keep that part of my life private. me and synni are in the exact same boat. you know NOTHING about me. for all you know i could be working a 9 to 5 like everybody else, but you never considered that possibility because im disabled. i did say in my video "fuck work" but guess what? people who have jobs also dont like working. synni has expressed the same "fuck work" rhetoric but instead of treating her as manipulative and evil in this situation you make her out to be a victim. we all know why youre talking about me the way that you are.

third of all, its not my fault synni is working 24/7??? its not my fault we're poor??? did you ever consider the economic climate rn??? or think to blame capitalism for making us need to work all of our lives only leaving us with a few hours to ourselves, barely surviving and scraping by? but of course, you dont want a rational answer to why synni and i are suffering financially. the internet always wants somebody to throw under the bus, and it will always be me because you will always see me as a mentally ill dangerous freak. think for yourself, unpack your own ableism. its exhausting.

OKAY BACK 2 NORMAL JACK MODE srry 4 writing a whole bible abt this, i feel VRY strongly abt this. my disabilities have been effecting me so badly ive been considering getting a wheelchair. (dont forget im physically disabled as well!!!) its not FUN 2 not be able 2 do the same things every1 else can (and it certainly isnt fun 2 have 2 explain that 2 ppl who dont care enough 2 understand) but i will never stop advocating 4 myself, becuz i never had any1 2 do that 4 me when i was a kid

[someshakespearequote]

Okay, I don't want to give airtime to assholes, but let's unpack this a little.

On the left, for the sexy way things used to be, we have:

Concept art for a Qunari woman, which was shown next to a Qunari guy wearing about as little. This didn't look like how Qunari looked in DAO! Also, this isn't actually a character! I understand that the guys making this video would prefer that women be objects of their desire rather than actual people in any capacity, but this was just an example piece!

Art for Morrigan looking like Little Red Riding Hood -- again, not actually how she looked in the game.

Leliana with a ridiculous glow-up because this is how she looked in the Urn of Sacred Ashes trailer, not in the actual game.

Isabela, okay, you got me, this one is actually an in-game asset, except that no, do not cite the DA2 ladies to me, witch. I was there when they were written. I am old enough to remember when DA2 shipped, and the spiritual ancestors of this asshole posted comments on messageboards saying that DA2 had no attractive romanceable women, because Bethany was your sister, Merrill had elven features, and Isabela was, according to these sad incels, "too exotic." I remember this because I remember saying, "If the dirty-talking sexually liberated rogue with sun-kissed skin and a lip piercing who runs around with no pants is not up to your standards, your standards are bad."

Meanwhile, on the right, for the apparent current non-sexiness, we have:

Morrigan, who a) looks great, to the point where some people are saying she should look older (not me -- give Morrigan the Cate Blanchett/Rachel Weisz "inexplicably hotter as she gets older" treatment, you go, girl); b) isn't a romance option this time; and c) is actually an in-game asset, unlike Little Red Concept Art over on the left.

Neve, using concept art that was meant to show the costume and not the attitude. Because when you see Neve in game sashaying up to you after freezing bad guys, she looks great, and when I saw the bit of her in the lighthouse with her scarf untied and her blouse unbuttoned, I legitimately forgot what the conversation was about. (And perish angry, ableist haters. People with prostheses get to be sexy, too.)

Taash, looking great. We still don't know what's going on with the whole gender deal there, but as someone who was lucky enough to take one random college elective course the same quarter that half of the varsity women's volleyball team decided to do so, if your spectrum for finding a woman hot does not include women who are tall and have muscles, then that's a you problem, not a them problem.

One random chargen Qunari, which, whatever.

Notes about people being trans, which, as with the ableism, perish angry. Trans women are women. And if Taash ends up being non-binary or some other non-cis-woman option, and that is what turns you off and not the muscles, then again, that's a you problem, not a them problem, and those of us who can like boobs even when they're on someone who isn't a cis woman will be over here with Ruby Rose and Demi Lovato.

Oddly not present on the horribly unsexy right:

Bellara, who is adorkable and also giving Neve a run for her money at "most distracting collarbones in the Lighthouse."

Harding, whose smile lights up the room in the scenes we've seen so far and who was called out by fans as someone they wanted back as a romance option after people saw her in DAI, which was before her glow-up.

Like, I understand that the ideal right thing to do is to tell these jerks that the companions of Veilguard are deep and fully realized characters, and judging them just based on which ones you wanna bang is asshole behavior... but this is a Dragon Age game. It is, as the devs once joked, a dating sim with a small "save the world" minigame you do between scenes. And by those standards, the women of Veilguard (either including Taash, or and also Taash, depending on how that goes) look fantastic. I don't know who I'm gonna romance yet, because I fall for a character more while I'm doing quests with them and getting to know them, but this is a squad with many flavors of gorgeous. Sorry it has character art that includes, you know, character and not the creepy sex doll look of one of those Steam games that includes disclaimers about everyone being of legal age and none of the girls being actually related to you.

It's not a them problem, assholes. It's a you problem.

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

The Sticking Point 6

No tag lists. Do not send asks or DMs about updates. Review my pinned post for guidelines, masterlist, etc.

Warnings: this fic will include dark content such as noncon, possible violence, illness, death, bullying, ableism, and other elements. My warnings are not exhaustive, enter at your own risk.

This is a dark!fic and explicit. 18+ only. Your media consumption is your own responsibility. Warnings have been given. DO NOT PROCEED if these matters upset you.

Summary: You are sent in the place of your ailing sister to marry a stranger. (Regency AU)

Character: Loki

Note: I'm moving tomorrow.

As per usual, I humbly request your thoughts! Reblogs are always appreciated and welcomed, not only do I see them easier but it lets other people see my work. I will do my best to answer all I can. I’m trying to get better at keeping up so thanks everyone for staying with me 💞

Your feedback will help in this and future works (and WiPs, I haven’t forgotten those!)

Love you all. Take care. 💖

The tension turns roiling. Even in such airy halls, you cannot escape it, not that you venture very far from your rooms. It seems with each interaction, your relationship with your fiance only grows more fraught. You needn’t wonder why. It’s the very same reason your own father regards you with derision. You’re defective, less than what he hoped for. 

You sit in the window seat, looking over the greenery that reflects Jade Garden’s title. It’s a home anyone would covet and yet it feels as a penitentiary might. These walls are unyielding and the isolation suffocating. 

Your visions drifts into the distance as the leaves turn to green smears blending into the dimming blue of the sky. You close your eyes and turn your head straight, leaning against the wall as you hook your arms around your legs. 

A banquet. It’s less than a proper debut. You’re not certain anyone would be expecting you, or even know who you are. Will they be surprised when they hear your father’s name?  

There are things you know. Things you must ready yourself for. Certainly, there will be jeers, mocking whispers, and errant giggles. Just the same as anyone ever reacted to you. Even the farmhands would echo your speech and laugh bawdily. It hardly matter’s your a lord’s daughter when you sound so ridiculous. 

You hang your head and sigh. It isn’t just one banquet, it is the beginning of a lifetime of events. You will not only face this one night, but many anon. You will be the one they speak of behind their hands and the joke at the card tables. 

You stand, made restless by your dread. The window darkens with the evening’s arrival. Doreen raps at the door and leaves a tray of supper. You pick at it but don’t eat much. You must keep yourself busy so your mind is not. 

You go to your chests. You will need Doreen to unpack these soon. It’s as if the longer you leave them full, the less assured your fate. You might still strap them up and flee. 

You know that isn’t truly an option. 

You take out a gown the shade of cooked pumpkin with an overlay that lends it a bronzish hue. The bodice is trimmed with an eyelet effect and the hem of the cap sleeves and skirt finely threaded with beads. You lay it out on the chaise and find a pair of slippers to go with it and ribbon for your hair decorated with black onyx and brass. 

If Edith could see you then. It should be her in your place. That thought rings louder and louder, bolstered by the constant disapproval. 

You back away from your attire, spinning so you won’t have to look upon it. You never thought to miss home so much. Not your parents, you’re certain they hardly grieve your absence, but for the familiarity, for the simple walls and memories. Edith is there, even gone, you know you would see her in every cushion and every corner. 

You go to the door and listen. As silent as ever. You emerge into the corridor and make careful progress on the pads of your feet. You come to the top of the stairwell and peer down on the foyer. For all it’s beauty, this place is rather grim. 

You descend and let your eyes lead you. You take in every ornament, every statue, every door trim, and every tile of the floor. You want to know it all. You don’t want to feel so lost. 

You find your way along to the sunroom. Upon your approach, the door opens and you falter. A lithe figure emerges. You press yourself to the wall, unready for Loki’s appearance. He has a snifter of liquor in hand as he glowers in the light of a lantern in his other.  

He steps towards you and pauses, lifting the light higher to cast over you. His breath escapes him derisively. He lowers the lantern and sniffs. 

“Like a rat, you skitter incessantly,” he remarks. 

“My Lawd,” you push away from the wall and angle away from him. 

“I am speaking to you. Do not go until I give leave to,” he demands. 

You stop and face him again, hands meeting in apprehension. 

“This banquet business,” his nostrils flare, “I will not be humiliated. Not as you have tonight.” 

“My Lawd, I have been twained in etiq—etiqwette,” you insist. 

He scoffs, “your manners hardly bother me. Certainly you might have some grain of awareness.” 

You seal your lips. He’s said it plainly, as you have. He might be able to close his ears to your impediment but it is with you always. 

“Perhaps you might keep your words to a minimum,” he advises, “select them wisely.” 

You stare at him, cheeks fiery and eyes tinging, “If you would wather, I might make an excuse. A sudden malady, my lawd. I’d hate to stain your chawacter.” 

His eyes roll to the side and his features sharpen, “more would be said were I to appear without my betrothed after my mother’s promises.” 

That he has referred to your nuptials is not so nice as it should be. He speaks to it as a sentence. You look him in the face. 

“It won’t eva go away,” you say. 

“Hm, I only need get through the wedding night,” he retorts and you can’t help but wince. 

You swallow, your hurt turning bitter. “As do I.” 

His head tilts and he squints. He lets out another snort, “pardon?” 

“My sista would’ve hated you,” you whisper. “You did not desawve to know haw.” 

“Be wary,” he steps closer. 

“You make an enemy of me, not I you,” you lift your chin.  

He’s silent. He shifts even closer. So near, you have to keep from wilting away. You stare back at him defiantly, heart beating. 

“You do not know yet what it is to have me as an enemy so you best mind your mannaws,” he mocks your cadence with his last word. 

Your lip trembles as he green eyes sparkle like dark emeralds in the lantern lights. Your chest is a flurry of hurt and anger. What have you ever done to him, or anyone, to make them so spiteful? You swing your arm against his to knock the snifter from his hand, sending a splash of alcohol across the wall and and his vest. The smell is acrid and sour. 

You back away from him, horrified at your reaction. You have learned to restrain yourself, to tamp it all down, to swallow it with a smile and say nothing. In that moment, you simply cannot. You shake your head as your face twists in despair. 

“I would wather an enemy, saw,” you hiss, “as I would be ashamed to call a cad like you husband.” 

His glare flashes and he sways as if he might lunge at you. He rights himself and his brow arches. His lips draw and his cheeks pale. 

“Very well.” 

He spins on his heel and stomps away, the light limning his silhouette sinisterly. You stare after him mortified. What has come over you? You were never bold or brazen or brutal to any. Edith would be disappointed. A gentle soul like her could never even think a hot word. 

You fall back against the wall and clutch your hands over your chest. Is this to be your life? Are you to live in loathing, not only of that man but of yourself. To be castigated for the lilt of your own tongue, the very pulse of your existence? You’d thought your father a villain but this man has proven himself worse. 

Worst than his distaste is your own futility, for he has assured you there is nothing you might do to appease him. As he is bound to you most miserably, so are you vowed to the same fate. Not even in that might you commiserate. 

🔹

You sit in front of the mirror, holding the brooch over the table, feeling the embroidery with the pad of your thumb. You turn it over and back again. It’s the only piece of your sister you have left. Every day she feels further away from you. Every morning, you awake, expecting to hear her, to see her, and she is not there, and you are not at home. 

You peer up at your reflection as your hand hovers over the painted wood. You’ve not touched a tress or cheek. You must ready, you know it, but your reticence is like chains on your wrists. You know what you are to face but knowing cannot make it any less unpleasant. 

A knock comes at the door. You call for the maid to enter, thinking Doreen’s come to remind you again of your pending engagement. The maid opens the door but says nothing, letting in the duchess instead. Lady Frigga is almost rapturous in a dressing gown of peach fabric as her hair is set already in tight curls around an elegant chignon. You stand, apologising for your misstep. 

“Dear, it is quite forgivable,” she assures, “I only meant to look in on you before the banquet, to be certain you do not require anything, but darling, oh,” she sweeps towards you and cups your cheeks, “you’ve not even begun. What is the matter?” 

“There is no issue,” you lie, “I mewely let time escape me.” 

You smile and gently pull away, turning back to the vanity. You open your hand and once more consider the pin. 

“Is this the dress you mean to wear?” Frigga asks as she crosses the room in a swish of silk. You peer over your shoulder as she looks down on the orange fabric. “It is a rather keen shade.” 

“Yes, my lady,” you answer in a dulcet tone. You cannot find a glimmer of concern for your attire. 

She sighs and returns to you, holding the ribbon you’ve chosen, “these are far too dour,” she touches an onyx, “haven’t you some pearls?” 

“Somewhaw...” You bend your neck, staring at the bluebird, at Edith’s handiwork. You remember the day she gave it to you and the way she smiled so proudly. How she pinned it on you herself and made you go around and show all. 

“Oh, dear, that won’t go at all. It would be nice for a lunch, no doubt, but not for a banquet,” she remarks and you close your hand around the brooch. You put your shoulders straight and face her. 

“I have a pawl band in my chest,” you resign and step around her. 

You go to the chest and sift around, careful not to let the brooch slip from your grasp. You take out the pearls on the ivory band and show it to her. She tuts. 

“It won’t go with this gown,” she insists. 

“Yes, the onyx--” 

“Mmp, I prefer pearls. Darling, you must be your best. It is your first social appearance. I do not say this to demean you, only to assist. I know your own mother cannot be here to see you debut but I cannot imagine her pain at this moment. So much loss. Both daughters at once, in a way,” she bemoans. 

Yes, you think of your mother too. You know she won’t be well. Nor your father. All their hopes and dreams dashed in a deficient daughter sent to carry a legacy on with a spiteful husband who mightn’t even have the stomach to deliver one. 

“I vewy much appweciate it, lady,” you make yourself smile, “I suppose it must be nawvs.” 

“Suppose it must,” she hums, “how about you wear the orange gown and I fetch you a feather pin from my own collection? I have a fabulous ostrich and topaz piece,” she assures, “and some black lace gloves. Ooh, yes, dear, we will make certain all is perfect.” 

“Thank you, Lady Fwigga, but it isn’t necessawy--” 

“You are to be my daughter, of course it is,” she preens. “Besides, who shall notice anything but how splendid you look?” 

She twists on her heel and your smile dwindles. You know what is meant. What she will not state plainly. Perhaps a fine outfit might distract from your crooked consonants. You sit on the stool again and watch her go. 

Even those who are kind cannot help their thoughts. She mightn’t be cruel about it, but you can hear the disappointment in her pandering cooing. You are not the daughter she wanted just as you are not the wife her son wanted. Just as you do not want to be as you are. 

[covid-safer-hotties]

Also preserved on our archive

By Julia Doubleday

This week, the head of the National Institute of Allergy and Infectious Diseases (NIAID), Jeanne Marrazzo, sat down with Stat News to discuss succeeding Anthony Fauci amid public concerns over ongoing H5N1 and mpox outbreaks.

The conversation yielded a staggering admission from Dr. Marrazzo as she downplayed risks of a bird flu pandemic:

"Can I make a quick digression? We recently had a long Covid [research] meeting where we had about 200 people, in person. And we can’t mandate mask-wearing, because it’s federal property. But there was a fair amount of disturbance that we couldn’t, and people weren’t wearing masks, and one person accused us of committing a microaggression by not wearing masks. And I take that very seriously. But I thought to myself, it’s more that people just want to live a normal life. We really don’t want to go back. It was so painful. We’re still all traumatized. Let’s be honest about that. None of us are over it."

This jaw-dropping justification is perhaps more jaw-dropping given that Dr. Marrazzo was not asked to comment on the meeting but broached the topic herself. Her statement clarifies that she and other public health officials don’t wear masks because they find basic disease control to be psychologically triggering. Let’s unpack the layers of anti-science, anti-patient, anti-public health and anti-reality rhetoric - not to mention rancid ableism- in this statement.

First let’s consider the context. Dr. Marrazzo is not referring to masking generally, although any public health official who is informed about the cumulative risks of COVID infections like long-term disability and brain damage should be. She is specifically justifying a refusal to mask at a Long COVID research meeting.

The RECOVER-TLC meeting in Bethesda at the end of September gathered hundreds of scientists, medical professionals and patients to discuss Long COVID. What is Long COVID? Let’s use the definition offered in a recent review article published in Nature Medicine:

"Long COVID represents the constellation of post-acute and long-term health effects caused by SARS-CoV-2 infection; it is a complex, multisystem disorder that can affect nearly every organ system and can be severely disabling. The cumulative global incidence of long COVID is around 400 million individuals, which is estimated to have an annual economic impact of approximately $1 trillion—equivalent to about 1% of the global economy. Several mechanistic pathways are implicated in long COVID, including viral persistence, immune dysregulation, mitochondrial dysfunction, complement dysregulation, endothelial inflammation and microbiome dysbiosis."

In other words, a quite serious, quite common outcome of SARS-COV-2 infection with a multitude of physical markers, poised to drastically disrupt world economies. Even after vaccination, Long COVID risk remained around 3-4% in a recent study. Long COVID can follow any COVID infection and affect anyone, and risks are known to be cumulative. That means reinfections continue to raise your risk of developing Long COVID. COVID is an airborne virus, transmitted by sharing air with infected individuals.

To debunk several misapprehensions, there is no special kind of person who gets Long COVID. There is, conversely, no special, “healthy” kind of person who cannot develop Long COVID. A person who has had COVID three times and feels okay is not now “immune” to Long COVID. No one has long-term immunity to COVID, and vaccinations can reduce the risk of, but not entirely prevent, COVID infections. COVID spreads in our communities at high rates year-round, with late-September wastewater data showing about half a million cases per day, or one in 57 Americans infected.

But experts gathering at a meeting about Long COVID should be well aware of all of the above.

In year five of the ongoing COVID pandemic, we have plenty of tools to ensure that a meeting- even an indoor, in-person meeting- remains safe for all attendees. Mitigation measures that would have reduced the risk of COVID transmission include adequate ventilation, CO2 monitoring, HEPA filtration, on site testing, Far UVC technology, and- of course- the use of high-quality, respirator style masks. While patients were easy to identify in respirators, many of the government officials and scientists who spoke plainly chose to make the space more dangerous for people with Long COVID.

The Sick Times noted that the lack of accessibility, the risk of reinfection for patient attendees paired with a poor-quality livestream, undercut the meeting’s message of urgency and care around the treatment of Long COVID.

Meetings among experts could easily serve as a gold standard for airborne disease mitigation, modeling how to prevent infections and therefore, inevitably, more Long COVID cases. Airborne disease mitigation could and should be the first line of defense against Long COVID; it is the one and only tool we have that is proven to be effective vs the little-understood disease. This is especially important at this early stage, when treatments are so limited, with no proven path to recovery and certainly no “cure”.

But Dr. Marrazzo and her colleagues, instead of focusing on how to halt the spread of COVID at their Long COVID research meeting, are focused on how to preserve their psychological denial that they, personally, are special people who are not at risk of developing Long COVID.

There is no scientific basis for this idea; it is the fantasy of the crowd, the collective delusion of people much less informed than they are, who are desperate to resume pre-pandemic life and have been fed years of propaganda about COVID’s supposed harmlessness. To participate in this public delusion rather than attempt to pop it is a social decision, not a scientific one. Marrazzo’s statement admits as much.

Marrazzo notes that there was a “fair amount of disturbance” that researchers continue to refuse to mitigate COVID while claiming to want to address the Long COVID crisis. She goes on to state that “one person” accused the group of “committing a microaggression” by not wearing masks, obliquely referring to longtime HIV/AIDS and COVID activist JD Davids. But Davids was far from the only activist angry with the lack of mitigations.

Long COVID patients have been exceedingly clear, for months and years, about their ongoing anger that even doctors explicitly engaged in COVID work refuse to practice mitigations. This failure to mitigate is violence that very literally harms, disables and kills people.

Long COVID patients participating in medical studies like this one at Stanford have been forced to drop out of critical research projects due to staff’s refusal to mask, take airborne precautions, and provide protection from reinfection in dangerous healthcare facilities.

Twitter user Michael Coyle stated in February 2023 that, “my partner and I have both dropped out of a multi-decade (longitudinal) health study, and I dropped out of a COVID transplant study because they weren't taking airborne precautions.”

In July of this year, Jordan Crane wrote, “I have had to withdraw from the Stronger study run by @georgeinstitute in collaboration with @monashuni, 11 months in. LC patients should not be exposed to reinfection during trials aimed at helping those with LC, but that's exactly what @monashuni are doing.”

This is not only immoral, it is bad science; if research teams reinfect Long COVID patients, as well as potentially infecting control subjects, any purported results of said studies would be corrupted and invalid.

If the public at large can claim ignorance- they have, after all, been repeatedly told that risks of COVID infection are minimal and comparable to other common viruses- public health officials have no such excuse.

And why is it, by the way, that the public is so certain that repeated, continual infection with COVID-19 will not harm them? Could it have something to do with the fact that researchers, doctors and public health officials continue to appear in public unmasked, clearly communicating that continual reinfections are safe and nothing to fear?

NIAID officials and other health professionals masking at a large, indoor meeting serves multiple critical public health purposes: one, it avoids spreading the virus, which would create new Long COVID cases. Two, it conveys to the public that SARS-COV-2 infections are not harmless, that Long COVID is serious and can develop from any case of COVID. And three, it expresses that prevention is the most vital- and really, the only- tool we currently have to effectively fight Long COVID.

Marrazzo states that she took public criticism of the lack of masks “seriously”. She then goes on to provide an entirely unserious response, dismissing said criticism by whining, “people just want to live a normal life.”

What, exactly, is meant by this? What population is seen as “people”, who is excluded, and what is “normal” in the construction of this odd sentence?

Quite clearly, Marrazzo and her colleagues do not want to live the life Long COVID patients and other disabled people are now forced to live- a life of continual infection avoidance. They do not want to wear masks, be associated with those who wear masks, be seen as “disabled,” as “other,” as “sick,” “vulnerable” or “abnormal”. They want to be normal- in other words, abled and ableist.

They do not want to be stigmatized, like the abnormal patients they claim to serve.

They do not want to stand out from the crowd of abled people who are healthy enough to tolerate another COVID infection- the “normal” people who aren’t annoying or weird or old or sick or dying.

Like normal (abled) people, they want to spread COVID in peace, while pretending they do not know the damage it inflicts. Like normal people, they want to use conferences as an opportunity to have their photos taken and network over cocktails. Like all the normal people who continue to exclude Long COVID patients from public spaces, these officials, too, will not be making it any easier for sick people to be safe outside their homes. Like normal people, they are going to operate under the assumption that Long COVID and disability cannot happen to them.

Because no study, no statistic, no patient, and no research can educate a medical professional out of ableism, the unmasked people who attended this meeting have all the information in front of them, and yet cannot understand that they, too, are at risk of disability.

Marrazzo goes on to say that she and her colleagues “don’t want to go back” because “it was so painful.” What was? Disease control? The thing public health literally exists to do? Because COVID is still very much with us - 1 in 57 Americans currently positive, you recall? Long COVID patients, disabled people, and people who are avoiding infection do not have any choice but to practice mitigations, and to do so with extreme strictness, given the lack of any coordinated disease control coming from the top. Every day, this task is made harder by the abdication of public health leaders who prioritize the comfort of the most privileged over the safety of the most vulnerable.

Patients are not merely harmed by the superspreader events Marrazzo and her colleagues continue to hold- although they and surrounding communities certainly are harmed by the spread of the virus itself- they are also harmed by the blasé attitude of officials which leads the families and friends of Long COVID patients to doubt the seriousness of their condition, or the need for precautions. Long COVID patients are unsafe in their own homes because masking has been so stigmatized that their own spouses, parents, and children will not stop reinfecting them.

If the head of the NIAID declares that she cannot wear a mask because she wants to be “normal,” what hope does an ill patient have to convince her husband to buck the social, political and professional pressure he faces in public life to consistently mask? When the very public health leaders who should be stressing the importance of tools that prevent reinfections are stigmatizing them, framing them as weird, abnormal and scary?

Lastly Marrazzo insists that researchers cannot wear masks because “we’re still all traumatized,” and “none of us are over it.”

A moment for the absurdity of the statement that you cannot use a safety tool that very literally saved lives during a traumatic event because you’re psychologically triggered by it. It is akin to saying you can’t wear a seatbelt because you were in a bad car accident and people died. Go to therapy. Wear the seatbelt. Definitely do not project your personal psychological problem with seatbelts onto the people fighting for auto safety.

Watching people get infected and die during a pandemic is certainly traumatizing. But…masks didn’t do that. SARS-COV-2 did. The same virus you’re spreading when you refuse to acknowledge and mitigate it, despite being well-aware of the long-term and cumulative harms of continual reinfections. By claiming the mask is triggering your trauma by reminding you of COVID, you are essentially saying that you exist in a state of utter denial that COVID currently surrounds you.

It’s doubly astounding to dare use the word “trauma” to describe the relationship of health officials toward masks while dismissing the trauma of patients being gaslit, ignored, further disabled, and forcibly reinfected by society at large- all while those who claim to want to heal them participate in stigmatizing the best prevention tool available.

Long COVID patients are traumatized by their illness, their abandonment, their social stigmatization, the relationships they continue to lose, in many cases the loss of careers and homes, and their utter exclusion from public life. Public health officials are not “traumatized” by having to mitigate the disease that inflicted and continues to inflict all of those actual traumas.

There is a social and cultural problem within public health institutions regarding airborne disease control. Broader social norms of ignorance and denial of the virus’s harms- which were themselves seeded by mainstream politicians and media, whose rhetoric was in turn cribbed from far-right libertarian thinktanks- have been absorbed into medical and public health settings.

The stigmatization of masking certainly began on the far right, but as Biden’s administration sought to normalize recurrent COVID reinfections and push people “back to normal,” Democrats joined in on the political project to socially destroy the tool humans would have killed for in centuries past. To be able to make use of respirators is not a burden or traumatic- it is a gift, not to mention a privilege that many around the world cannot access. People gathering for a Long COVID meeting should be all the more grateful, knowing full well the outsize outcomes such a small device can prevent.

It is a shame, a failure, and a shock to hear a public health official with so much power contribute to anti-mask sentiment amidst spreading mask bans which will kill disabled people. At a time when public health should be educating the public about the importance of mitigation, stressing the value of these tools, people in power are declaring masks weird and abnormal, contributing to further stigmatization of those who need these devices to even enter public spaces.

It is shockingly anti-science to hear a public health official disparage disease control technology at the altar of fascist social norms that seek to disappear disabled people from public entirely.

Dr. Marrazzo’s words reveal that she does not identify with Long COVID patients, nor does she see them as “people” who deserve to be a part of “normal” life. Only the able-bodied- those who have not yet been disabled by COVID- have a right to “normal,” which is defined by the disappearance of accessibility, disease mitigation, and medical devices. Trauma is not what has been and continues to be inflicted on those most harmed by COVID, it is what is experienced when a doctor sees a mask and, for just a second, remembers what it felt like to be scared, to feel vulnerable, to feel like maybe illness and death weren’t things that come only for the weak, the lesser, and the old.

But those days are over.

[cupcraft]

Just remembered cuddy’s argument over whether house needed a closer handicap spot or not and saw red. That was her lowest point in terms of ableism tbh. You dont need the parking spot….youre an addict….Shes in a wheelchair…. GET REAL!!!

No yeah that episode should've been unpacked more over the course of the series. She was like "Well technically house the ADA says 50 feet is how much you can walk so that means you're life's fine your spot is 50 feet away teehee!" and he's like "Um cuddy you realize that the ADA is not all encompassing and chronic pain and mobility issues is a lot more than feet to the door like I have to plan my bathroom breaks, when the elevator's out, walking to from my office to the clinic, etc. like it's a lot more than that....?" and she's like um well you're not SUPER disabled bc you can walk so it's not as bad as you say! And as punishment House had to use a wheelchair to "prove" he could handle "not walking" (even though House himself has used wheelchairs before and often uses it in certain settings, ie on planes. and Secondly, it shouldn't matter if he has or not) and forces him and the other doctor to fight each other instead of trying to make the hospital at large more accessible for the both of them. And then when House god forbid stands up to save someone's life during surgery he "cheated" and "proved he wasn't really that disabled because god forbid you stood during surgery!" Like are you fucking kidding me.