#unless you done a lot of therapy work

[neatfrog]

me watching alrawabi s2 thinking it’s gonna have a happy ending

[medicinemane]

I don't know, I get tired of a lot of positivity

Like yes yes, the world's wonderful and I'm so strong or whatever generic thing is being said (because it's always so generalized to the point of meaningless), but you know shit is what it is, and the only way forward is with changes I manage to make... which you're not helping with at all

And as for like... my internal mood, I'm deeply isolated, sorry if hollow platitudes don't sooth the gaping maw inside me

It is what it is, and I probably get my shit together enough to do stuff like teach out of my basement like I'd like, it's just I believe that I'll be alone in a crowd like I've always been

But positivity... I just... I kinda get sick of it. There's this guy on youtube I watch who talks about economics stuff, he's recently started doing positivity and... I just fucking know his personality enough where it's like sorry mate but I'm not interested in hearing you spout Secret light kinds off drivel

...I don't know, I suppose it boils down to this

One, I can barely fucking take in positive things said directly to me, about me. Generalizations don't help even a little... I'm a mess, I'd really like someone to toss me a life preserver instead of always tossing confetti at me while I struggle to stay afloat... doesn't help

Two, the world is a terribly imperfect place, and rather than taking a mentality of "everything will work out", I think it's important to acknowledge that sometimes good people live alone, die alone, and they never got the break they needed and slowly bled out

I think it's worth knowing that if you can't step in and help yourself, then maybe no help'll come at all

...I don't know, I suppose in the end the core of what I'm saying is a lot of positivity seems like self help tier stuff and... I get tired of that, and I see so many good people struggling and... eh... either I can at least come in and say something positive custom fit to them, or I can keep my mouth shut

Just fucking let me rot. Help or let me fester on my own, you know?

I got rid of the trailer, I maybe did something like cleaning though I can't tell... at what point will my pace on trying to make things better be good enough for people, and I'll be able to stop having people tell me to fix my life... as if I hadn't thought of that already

...everyone means well, it's just tiring

[harmoonix]

Winter Observations ❄️

❄️ Saturn in late degrees or 3rd decan (20° to 29° degrees) is meant to finish a lesson in this lifetime. The lesson can be something unfinished from your past life

❄️ Capricorn Moons/10th house Moons have a hard time staying focused only on one thing. They want to do multiple things at once due to their multitasking power

❄️ Saturn in the 6th/8th or 12th house gets drained easily. Tiredness can be a problem for them. They need to maintain a balance between their work and some time for themselves

❄️ 2nd house placements may love to make gifts/spoil others with it. They also love to plan things for others like surprises, parties, etc

❄️ moon - jupiter aspects are gifted with wisdom and optimism. Somehow, it is hard for them to think badly upon a situation. Always keeping their heads up

❄️ Chiron in the 2nd house or Taurus may struggle with their worth/self - value. They can over criticize themselves. They may also struggle to love their bodies

❄️ Having Moon or Venus dominance in your chart shows that you're a very gentle and nice person. Also, don't let others take your nice personality in vain

❄️ a couple who shares the same chiron sign can share the same traumas/dark traits. Couple therapy can be a healing key for you

❄️ Sun in the 11th house can sometimes indicate being married multiple times during your lifetime. Kinda like J-LO reference (Mi gente latino💣)

❄️ Taylor Swift has both Moon and Chiron in Cancer, which can be a bit of a sign of 'making a song about every romantic experience you went through'

❄️ Those with Chiron x harsh Venus aspects have a hard time opening their feelings. Sometimes, these can indicate a fear of breakup or abandonment

❄️ Mercury in dark houses like 8th or 12th hosue can turn to be big snitches. Mercury tends to have a darker energy here, especially if also aspects Pluto

❄️ Aries in the 3rd/6th or 11th house can posses a violent nature when it comes to their talking. Basically, it tends to curse and talk dirty a lot

❄️ Virgo in the 8th or 12th house can be triggered by many things. Is like you live in permanent fear of something. They may also show lots of phobias

❄️ Someone with Virgo Chiron is definitely the therapist of their friends, family and even partner. People approach you so much when they need help

❄️ 1st house lord in the 4th or 6th houses have a very empathic/kind nature. They also tend to be quite nostalgic and very in tune with themselves

❄️ 10th hosue lord in the 11th house can becomes famous on internet before anything else. Is it like people will know you from social media

❄️ Aries Risings or Mars should find a career/job where they can take the leader position because it fits them so much. They can also work in fields where people may do lots of physical work

❄️ 3rd house placements, especially Venus/Mars/Moon, may have a passion for cars/motorcycles/bikes. Everything that has wheels

❄️ Leo Chrion is either a placement where the native seeks love and attention, either the placement where the native never got to experience these

❄️ Leo Jupiter has a lot of chances to become popular for their talents. It can be done in a creative field such as acting or drawing

❄️ Lots of ppl with Mercury in the 10th house tend to be remembered for their voices. It's like the voice you'll always remember, even after a long time

❄️ Venus in the 4th house can often get a spouse who can be the 'bread winner', basically a traditional family or a trad spouse as well

❄️ Venus and Moon in the 5th house can be good at flirting/taking the first step in a relationship. Head over heals energy

❄️ Mercury in the 6th house is a very active house for Mercury. Basically, communicating daily helps your mental health and mood. You may also worry a lot as a person

❄️ Idk why people romanticize possessive aspects in a relationship like pluto - venus/asc/mars. They're not okay unless you're in that situation..which I don't wish upon nobody

❄️ I wrote in the past about how I don't get along with cancer placements, I realized it was because most cancer people I knew were very controlling. Tbh with you, I never got the chance to meet good people with cancer placements

❄️ Lacking water placements in your chart can manifest in 2 ways:

Being hypersensitive, lacking the feeling of feeling love or closure

Being a cold person. Not showing your feelings to the world thinking that they see you as a weak/soft person

❄️ Pisces Risings always tell what's on their heart. They seem so genuine and nice even when you don't interact with them.

❄️ Moon in Scorpio or the 8th hosue can indicate intense inner feelings. Is hard for them to explain what they feel, and that's what can make them to be more private

❄️ Something that I observed within the moon in fire signs or fire houses 1st/5th/9th is that they get pissed off very easily. Is so easy for them to burst out and be angry/sad/moody

❄️ Jupiter in Cancer/Capricorn/Libra/Leo can experience a step family. Like step-dad, step-mom, step siblings, Jupiter can also give you things in excess ex: in Cancer/Leo, many family members

❄️ Jupiter in aspects with Lilith (all aspects), can indicate issues with hypersexuality. Like I said, Jupiter can give you things in excess. When aspecting Lilith, the desire for physical touch can be high

❄️🩵 Hope you all have a good winter season for the next 3 months!! Also early/late happy birthday for everyone born in the winter🙏🏼🥳

Harmoonix ❄️🩵🫶🏼 2024

[heartlilith]

Solar Return Observations🦋

Having Venus in the 12th squaring the MC can mean that your relationship drama is the topic of conversation in the workplace that year

Any planet that resides/aspects your MC, could very well become public knowledge that year. For example; Venus - love life, Mars - sex life, Pluto - secrets

In your Solar and Lunar Return Chart, make sure to look at degrees. 29 degrees in Venus could mean a relationship comes to an end or a love-related chapter closes in a big way. Moon in 29 degrees could mean emotionally maturing and getting past hurt you held onto in the past; finally getting over something

For 0 degrees, expect a fresh start. Say the planet Mercury, you may say things that offend people or maybe you're insensitive (with or without meaning it) and people are correcting you a lot that year, "don't say that". Or you start studying something new and you make a lot of mistakes on exams because it's a fresh start! All this depends on houses and aspects, either way there's a lot of learning that has to be done with 0 degree placements.

If your natal Sun, Moon, or Rising falls into your SR 12th house, you won't feel like yourself that year. The good part is that you'll come out of the year wiser and more mature.

Neptune in the 8th house in the Solar or Lunar Return should be very very very careful of substance use or anything potentially addictive. Neptune= addictions, illusion, smoky mirrors, 8th house= obsession, transformation, death and rebirth, finances

Having Sun in the 12th house this Solar Return Year is fucking wild. You realize so much shit. I have Venus there too. The rose colored glasses have come off and I see things way different than I did before. BIG realizations that are painful and uncomfortable but they're growing pains, necessary.

Your Moon sign in your Solar Return Chart can show how you emotionally react to things this year. Cancer Moon = you're going to be more sensitive, take things personally, be more empathetic in situations, have more emotional depth this year and be more caring and compassionate with yourself and others. Sagittarius Moon = you'll be able to see things in a broader way when faced with problems, it'll be easier for the problems to roll of your shoulders, you'll learn a lot emotionally and take things as lessons.

Your rising sign in the Solar Return Chart is going to be how you approach and see things in the world and how the world sees and approaches you. Having Scorpio/Pluto in the 1st house- learning, growing, and transformation that year will be huge and more or less drastic, you may transform others/situations that you come into contact with as well. Aries/Mars in the 1st house- you may approach things with more energy and vitality, this could rub off on the people around you and they could become energized too by feeding off that energy.

Uranus in the 10th house means you're 90% likely to change your job in some way; whether losing your job, being promoted and having completely different tasks OR working remotely or online more

Sun aspects are at the forefront in SR Charts (unless Sun is in the 12th house). If the orb is below 3 degrees, you'll exhibit the traits of the aspecting planet... a lot. Square/Opposition - more of the negative traits, Conjunction/Trine/Sextile - more positive traits.

Sometimes you have to think past the general meanings of the houses and instead, learn how the houses specifically relate to you. For me, I had Moon in the 6th house and I'm thinking my health will fluctuate more and I'll be working around women more for the year. Instead, I adopted 2 kittens and they became my world, along with my 1 year old dog I adopted last year. They are my children and I am their mother! My days consisted of taking care of them and also working and they became a source of therapy for me.

Alternative Meanings of the Houses:

1st house - What energy we rub off on the people around us, the lense we're using to see the world (pessimistic, realistic, optimistic, delusional, naive), the vibe of the situations we'll be faced with (Moon/Cancer - emotional situations, Sun/Leo - public/in the spotlight situations, Saturn/Capricorn - mature/karmic situations)

2nd house - How what we buy affects our self worth, for example, Neptune/Pisces - buying a lot of charts and readings that year, maybe feeling unsure or lost. Moon/Cancer - Buying a lot of blankets, pillows, food, maybe you're striving to feel more comfortable and stable. Jupiter/Sagittarius - Buying a house or paying for school, maybe you're trying to expand and learn. Trying to take the next step.

5th house - Your free time, what helps you relax/channel energy. Taurus - eating a good meal, laying on the couch. Gemini - driving around town, hanging out with friends. Aquarius - yoga, reading a book, or scrolling social media

10th house - When people gossip about you, the topics give off _____ vibes. Pluto/Scorpio - dark, secretive, mysterious ("what happened to her?" "Who is he?" "where are they from?"). Venus/Libra/Taurus: jealous, shallow, materialistic vibes (office romances, about your beauty or clothes). Mercury/Gemini//Virgo - harsh, calculated, competitive (how smart you are/how you're a know it all, where you went to school, your job tasks)

Book a Reading

Masterlist

[comfortless]

this thought has been running around in my head for weeks and your König hcs are my favorite… so here i go

what icks do you think our König has? ik he may consider himself to fall in the “beggars can’t be choosers” category but i am just so curious… 🤔

FAVORITE?! 💞 you are so correct about the “beggars can’t be choosers” mentality. König is very much aware of how other people tend to view him as some creepy, stupid brute. i think that there is certainly a lot that bothers him, mostly attributed to his past, but none of it is an actual dealbreaker in any sense. you’re likely to be met with a cold shoulder and a bit of trust diminished at most. the majority of his “icks” are just him picking up on red flags. the gross or awkward things are just cute to him!

A very “vapid” approach to interests and such is going to make him concerned. König does not understand trends, or liking something simply because someone else does. He equates keeping up with pop culture and fashion as being similar to the children that tortured him in the past (So: popular kids with popular hobbies). Authenticity is held in high regard here. The stranger and more alienated that you are, the more compatible and similar you two may be in his mind.

This said, König would go feral seeing you in one of those pretty dresses or outfits that are all the rage. Dressing like a cute milkmaid for a picnic date, playing some sweet love song for him that you may have picked off a viral video, etc. He’s not exactly in touch with these things so he’s no proper judge or jury here.

Being too pushy. There’s a fine line there that’s not to be crossed. He much prefers playing the role of a leader rather than being a submissive follower. He’ll boast about being your devotee, worship like a dog at your feet, but he likes to feel in control of the relationship and what goes on within it.

He’ll never tell you directly that yes, his anxiety will be gnawing at his guts if you plead with him to come along with you to a commonly crowded mall, and expects that a simple rejection should suffice. It’s likely he would keep hushed about the fact that your frustrated pleading actually turns him on, too.

Being unnecessarily cruel. The man gets cruelty, he’s paid in abundance for it. But women should be sweet and soft. If you’re talking poorly about another person, using words like “ugly” or a slur of some kind, how are you any better than some bully? It does not matter that the victim can not hear you speaking about them, what matters is that he can. It would send him into a spiral of thinking that each time you two have had an argument, you’re likely cruelly chattering about him to your friends afterward.

Yet… he is very much the type to shoot an inept employee a glare and make demands. He will call his fellow operators all sorts of things when he returns from a mission gone wrong. König is the king of double standards here.

By extension, dogging him/his work/his interests is sure to bother him. König likes to believe that he’s done the work to make himself more pleasing now: trained his body through the military to give himself the stature women seem to drool over, covers what he can of his face when it’s socially acceptable so that others don’t harp on an unpleasant glimpse, even thinks of himself as some sort of chivalrous gentleman (very easy to do so as no one gets a peek at what goes on in his mind). His work, not therapy, is where he gets to blow off steam in a justifiable, honorable way. Sure, he’s got some dorky, juvenile interests, but they’re things that he enjoys.

Talk of previous relationships/sex would immediately make his blood boil! Even if it’s said to assure him that he’s better than a former lover. He’s just very jealous and if he were to be blunt, he would tell you he is addicted to the relationship and doesn’t want to think of anyone else ever having what he does currently. It’s best not to mention any past you may have had unless you care to answer a series of questions. “Were they better in bed?”… “Full name?” … “When did you last see them?”

Ironically, if you already have children, he would absolutely adore the stepdad role. It’s not so much as a challenge, then, only the glee that comes with getting to play savior for more than one person.

Infidelity. Whether in a past relationship or in a current one with him. The thought of you ever cheating on him, emotionally or physically, would tear him apart. Something as simple as a fantasy of wanting two or more men to serve you is filed messily in his brain with this, too. Same with you confessing to finding another man attractive, whether a celebrity, someone entirely fictional, or even some random civilian padding by on the sidewalk. All of that counts as some minute form of infidelity to König. He does not share.

He’s guilty of threesome fantasies, guilty of staring down a woman that he finds attractive… he just doesn’t act on these things, holds his tongue and huffs that he certainly wasn’t looking and would never want to fuck any one other than you. It does not really occur to him that those things are normal, especially in long term relationships.

Bear in mind that this is all from a man who almost entirely lacks shame. He’s comfortable with himself now (somewhat). He has no qualms with chewing the skin around his fingernails when he’s stressed out, picking his nose in front of you, shitting with the bathroom door wide open, or talking with his mouth full when he’s just that engaged in a conversation. I think it’s only fair to include some of the things he does that may be repulsive!

Absolutely clueless when it comes to seeing you cry. He has no idea how to comfort someone properly as he never really had that. His solution seems to be hovering over you and asking a thousand questions or just draping himself over you and letting your arms curl over him for comfort.

Would kiss you with his eyes open. Not his fault that you’re so pretty and he doesn’t want to miss a moment of it. Not always, but once is bad enough.

Would absolutely send you an “I miss you” text the day after your first date. Will also tell you that he’s in love with you the first time you have sex.

Will get hyperfixated on historical weapons and will absolutely purchase some rusted, ancient relic without telling you beforehand. It gets well polished and loved, then displayed on your living room wall.

Loves talking about his kills. He’s proud, because if there’s one thing that he’s good at it’s knowing where to shoot or stab or punch. He knows to hold his tongue about the more grisly details around someone delicate, but more often than not he is prone to slip-ups.

Will use your toothbrush without asking.

Thinks he’s very skilled and very cool because he can trim up any overgrown facial hair with a pocket lighter. It is not cool. There’s a razor and shaving cream right there. He may not burn himself, but it’s not exactly pleasant to have your bathroom smelling of burned hair.

Does not have a lick of fashion knowledge. Plain t-shirts, jeans, combat boots, maybe a belt if he cares to bother with it at most. At the least, when he’s at home, you can expect him to indulge in some nudist fantasy because it’s unlikely he will bother to wear a thing. Maybe socks.

[nurse-floyd]

Carlos Motherfucking Sainz

This man. I cannot. Also, these men also keep putting my love of nursing and my love of F1 together so let's get into it! How did Carlos Sainz manage to win 2 weeks after having an appendectomy?

In the UK, at least, you can leave the hospital the same day you've have an appendectomy as long as there are no complications as long is it was done laparoscopically and there were no complications (burst appendix etc)

Carlos had his appendix removed laparoscopically (which I predicted considering how quickly he was back at the paddock to watch the Grand Prix!) you can tell by the incisions - 3 small ones for the camera and tools rather than one long incision for an open appendectomy.

Usually after an appendectomy you can go back to work after 1-2 weeks. IF YOU HAVE A NON-PHYSICAL JOB. We know this man was back training and strengthening as soon as he could. You can usually start to work out after 2 weeks, depending on wound healing. Those sit ups would have been agony!

That alone would have had him in a lot of pain, let alone the amount of g-force the drivers encounter when they're driving around the circuits - up to 5G in some cases. That's 5x their body weight.

On his latest Instagram post you can see him in a weird glass tube - this presumably is a hyperbaric chamber. There are multiple studies investigating the effectiveness of hyperbaric oxygen therapy in the speedier healing of surgical wounds and reduction of post-operative infection.

In short, this type of therapy can reduce inflammation and boost the formation of white blood cells (the cells that protect the body against infection and defend it from attack of unknown organisms) to improve healing and lower the risk of infection.

Overall, we know he wouldn't have been able to drive unless he was safe to and he said himself they made sure he could get out of his car in the required time and padded his wound and made adjustments to ensure his comfort but you could see the pain he was in after and Lando helping onto the podium.

That man deserves his seat.

[blacknedsoul-blog]

A detailed explanation from my headcanon that Annabel has ADHD

So I had this six fucking hour trip. On a bus. Alone. And I was bored out of my mind, because sitting around being bored is as close to mental torture as it gets for me.

Fortunately, the light at the end of the tunnel: I was inspired. Away from the burnout I have with fanfics, I remembered that I've mentioned this headcanon several times on Nevermore's Discord and just thought, what better time to talk about ADHD than when I'm having a pretty ADHD moment?

But before I start, there are a few little things that need to be pretty clear on the table:

I'm being a bit hypocritical here: in general, I'm deeply against diagnosing fictional characters for two reasons: first, it's an impossible task to distinguish between character traits and symptoms to such an extent that you can go around forever without coming to a real conclusion unless the author of the work confirms it, and second, even if you have the disorder you're talking about, you can fall into the trap of perpetuating stereotypes or generalizing, thereby invalidating other experiences. So even if the tone of this review sounds very assertive, it is because of my writing style. I am in no way diagnosing Annabel; this is an analysis of her character through the lens of a possible disorder.

In relation to the above, where I point out an event in the comic that can be read as a symptom, I am not reducing it to "this only happens because she has ADHD". You CAN'T reduce a person's personality to "they has a disorder," and when I point out these examples, I'm not doing so with the intention of denying the background behind it, but rather pointing out how, under the magnifying glass of having it, it might exacerbate that behavior.

I am NOT a psychologist, a psychiatrist, or a neurologist: I am a woman with ADHD. One who has done a lot of research on the subject, been in therapy with a psychologist who specializes in the disorder, and talked extensively about it both with friends who also have it and with professionals. But I don't have a career in mental health, I don't pretend to, and everything you'll read below is a mixture of research and personal experience.

You're going to see a lot of "we" or "those of us with ADHD" because, as I said, I have it too, but this is all a generalization made for the sake of flow. The symptoms of this disorder can be expressed in many different ways, and not everyone has all of them (for example, there are some that I don't have, but it would be strange to change the voice of the text just because of that, it makes it harder to read). If you have ADHD and read a symptom and think "hey, I don't get that", that's perfectly normal. Your experience is valid and I don't want to pass it on. But it would be exhausting for me and for the reader to use tentative phrases all the time.

If this text resonates too much with you, I strongly recommend that you see a professional, if you're able, and not self-diagnose: ADHD has many symptoms in common with autism and other neuro divergences, don't risk misdiagnosis.

If you have a different opinion than mine on this subject and want to share it with me, I'll be happy to read it, if I don't answer it's because I forgot (forgive me?). But you can be sure that I will read it.

Anyway, let's get started.

What is ADHD?

According to the NIH (National Institute of Mental Health) website, this is the definition of ADHD:

Attention-deficit/hyperactivity disorder (ADHD) is marked by an ongoing pattern of inattention and/or hyperactivity-impulsivity that interferes with functioning or development. People with ADHD experience an ongoing pattern of the following types of symptoms:

Inattention means a person may have difficulty staying on task, sustaining focus, and staying organized, and these problems are not due to defiance or lack of comprehension.

Hyperactivity means a person may seem to move about constantly, including in situations when it is not appropriate, or excessively fidgets, taps, or talks. In adults, hyperactivity may mean extreme restlessness or talking too much.

Impulsivity means a person may act without thinking or have difficulty with self-control. Impulsivity could also include a desire for immediate rewards or the inability to delay gratification. An impulsive person may interrupt others or make important decisions without considering long-term consequences.

Here is an impression that needs to be clarified: ADHD is more about an inability to regulate attention than a lack of it. A neurotypical person may choose to focus on a task to get it done, we may procrastinate to death because even if we want to, we can't focus on it, or stand there absorbed in it ad infinitum until the house falls down around us (and we may still have trouble noticing). This is understood, Understanding all this, here is the list of Annabel's behaviors that could be interpreted as symptoms.

Hyperactivity

One thing that not everyone knows is that hyperactivity is not about running around like an uncontrolled animal. It can manifest itself in many ways, and there are many types: physical, mental, and even emotional.

In Annabel's case, she seems to be the first two types.

Perhaps due to her difficulty in expressing emotions, it is quite obvious at this point in the comic that her moods are made explicit through gestures: playing with her rings when she is happy or nervous, touching the ribbon around her neck in moments of anxiety, or playing with her hair almost as a default state.

Annabel.

Doesn't.

Sit.

Still.

Never.

It is also clear that Annabel is always planning something. Always.

This can be read into the logic of mental hyperactivity: when you have it, your brain just doesn't stop. Ever. And that's something that resonates with this lady.

Emotional Dysregulation

The part of the brain that regulates our moods works…erratically. Not to say it doesn't work at all.

This leads to a painfully common problem in women with ADHD: lack of emotional regulation is seen as drama, and instead of being taught tools to deal with it, we are taught to repress and bottle up emotions.

Annabel has highly internalized this as a defense mechanism. But here's the thing: if repressing emotions instead of learning how to deal with them in a healthy way is harmful, being biologically unable to regulate them can be even worse.

It touches the right nerves, and if you catch us flying low, it can cause explosive outbursts.

Possibly violent reactions to feeling offended or uncomfortable.

Or completely over-the-top reactions that we can't control.

And it's not just anger that's affected, it's the whole emotional spectrum. Another emotion that is very noticeable is fear. If we don't develop tools to help us calm down, we don't get scared, we panic.

If this happens too often, we can become prone to developing severe anxiety or frequent attacks.

We may also have great difficulty dealing with frustration. Our brains love rewards, and feeling that we're not getting them because of our own inability to do something can be downright annoying. And if we don't have the tools to express our frustration appropriately, we can have quite childish reactions, ranging from temper tantrums to…pouting.

I find it funny how several of these pouts are caused by Lenore, a bit like "Oh, come on, honey, what are we talking about?"

Another important thing to note here is that one of the most fucked up and notorious symptoms of this lack of emotional regulation is RSD, short for Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria, defined as "a problem that interferes with your ability to regulate your emotional responses to feelings of failure and rejection. While rejection is almost always unpleasant, people with RSD experience overwhelming levels of emotional pain. This can lead to long-term mental health problems, fear of failure, and behavioral changes that negatively affect them throughout their lives."

Rejection and fear of failure are a problem for us. So much so that we may seek strategies to avoid it as much as possible, even when it causes us problems (such as not completing a task for fear of doing it wrong). This is an issue that can tear us apart emotionally.

Annabel is terrified of being rejected or despised. Her whole life has been built around appearances and getting the right people interested in her. If she can't do that, what good is she?

And that's something that comes up a lot in her relationship with Lenore. Repeatedly, in fact, but my favorite has to be this one:

Annabel thought it would be the smart thing to do to break that bond because she knows they're never going to see each other again. But the look on her face when Lenore calls her a "damn liar" is just painful to watch. I think ripping her heart out with a rusty spoon would have hurt less.

Finally, on the subject of things that aren't so funny: that thing Annabel does about biting her fingers when she's in a critical situation is something I used to do, too (only I'd bite my knuckles or palms).

My psychologist explained to me that when you feel like you're losing control, you immediately look for something to ground you, and unfortunately, physical pain is often a quick (if damaging) way to do that.

Codependency

Okay, here's a thing: it's not that we have a tendency as such to codependency, but this is a situation that can occur due to bad practices within a relationship. Especially a couple one.

As it stands out, people with ADHD can have a lot of problems with micromanaging ourselves, remembering things, dealing with our emotions, etc, etc, etc. And it is natural for close friends, family or our partner to help in those processes.

The problem arises when that help starts to become a parentification process where the partner who is providing support starts to do this on behalf of the other person, infantilizing them in the process.

This is a cocktail for resentment on both sides: the party calling the shots can easily feel that the other is putting a huge burden on their shoulders and not trying hard enough, while, on the other side, no one likes to feel like they are being treated like a child. Let alone that the person doing it is your partner.

But at the other end of resentment, there's codependency.

The constant feeling that you are a burden, insufficient or even disposable.

And that means you have a lot to make up for. On a regular basis. So much that you put yourself in a situation where you have to make horrible decisions so that someone else doesn't have to because somehow you owe it to them, who hasn't had that happen?

What I mean is that yes, Annabel feels like she owes this to Lenore because she only remembers the part where Lenore came kicking in doors to save her from a marriage she didn't want. And if she can't do this for her, she doesn't deserve a relationship.

Feeling inadequate, that your partner is doing you some kind of favor by tolerating you and ending up idealizing their in the process is obviously not unique to the neurodivergent experience.

But we try, we try really hard and, like anyone else, we like to feel that the effort we put in is seen and valued.

If we are not careful about that, we do indeed fall into the risk of becoming codependent. The desire to feel loved or valued becomes a constant hunger for validation from which it is difficult to escape because we are aware that our brain will never function in a different way. And if that is mixed with RSD, it can become an even bigger problem.

Novelty, games, challenges, and rewards

Producing dopamine on a normal basis is one thing our brains aren't very good at (one of the reasons we can be prone to depression, for example), but you know what they love? Challenges and rewards.

New things feed our endless curiosity, but for some reason unknown to me, our brains really love challenges and dares. They give us dopamine like we're on a high.

So much so that some people use it as a tactic to perform tasks they don't like: "How many dishes can I wash before my dinner is ready?", "If I can finish this in less than 30 minutes, I can go get chocolate."

One medium we may like very much for this reason is games. Board games, card games, or virtual games. It doesn't matter. Games provide a very good balance of challenge and reward.

If you see that Annabel seems overly interested in how this works, it's because there may be a part of her that thinks "aside from the deadly situation we're in…this is like the most hardcore escape room ever" and inevitably there's something here that stirs her bug.

It may be something she loves about Lenore. As a good hypocrite, Annabel despises the rules she knows so well, so when Lenore comes along with this gimmick and completely changes the paradigm of what she knows, there is inevitably something that appeals to her. Others who are good at the game look down on Lenore's disdain for the rules, to Annabel it is fucking appealing because it offers a range of unexplored possibilities that she fucking loves.

Erratic Communication

When our brains are running at full speed, communication can become a challenge, and we tend to exhibit erratic patterns.

One of these is info-dumping. Touch a topic we know about or are interested in and it's like stepping on a landmine: we explode talking about it. Non-stop. You'll have to hit us to shut us up.

Another thing is that we can have a bad habit of interrupting. A lot. It's not malicious, it's just that we're really into the conversation and want to participate as much as possible.

That said, even if we're extroverts, it can be a nightmare to withhold information or participate in a conversation if it doesn't grab our attention. It's not that we want to be disrespectful or anything, it's just that, again, we have no control over our ability to pay attention and we're swimming against the tide to hold on to whatever it is you're telling us.

This scene is something I've seen in friends with ADHD and have been told I do: stare at people while doing your best to do the hamster run to remember what they're telling you because you know it's important, even though your brain is putting it together with junk information because it's not engaging your attention in the right way.

Ignore the murderous stare part, it's not that common - at least I hope not.

Drinks that are like a pill

Our brains are not designed to produce certain hormones naturally or, in some cases, they produce them under other circumstances. For things like that, we can take pills, develop strategies to help our brains produce hormones.

And drink coffee. Lots of coffee.

Caffeine can be extremely relaxing for us because it can actually help our brains keep functioning, you know that stereotype of the highly coded ADHD character who drinks coffee like it's his life? Well, that's because.

You know what other beverage has a similar effect? Tea. Theine is also a natural activator, perhaps less aggressive than coffee, but it can have a similar effect.

If you're interested in describing this topic in fanfic or touching on it in fanart, tea should have a relaxing effect on Annabel and even help her concentrate.

Boredom

We get bored. A lot. And we get painfully bored. Here's what happens: boredom is caused by a lack of stimulation, and our brains aren't stimulated just because we can't regulate our attention to seek out that stimulation.

Add to that the fact that when we are bored, without dopamine hitting our receptors, our executive functions diminish and we function like shit.

Boredom

Is

Fucking

Murder

Because our brain starts desperately asking for dopamine and we can fall into really unhealthy behaviors like fighting, being chronically online, or eating because we can't find anything better to do. This also contributes -again- to our depression or anxiety.

Conclusions (and if I don't make the joke, I'll die)

In the book ADHD After Dark (a study of ADHD, relationships, and physical intimacy), Ari Tuckman draws some interesting conclusions, one of which is that on a statistical level, people with ADHD seem to be more likely to have what he calls "sexual eagerness": kinks, fetishes, a tendency to be adventurous in bed, and the like. Again, our brains love play, and both intimacy and flirtation can involve a lot of it.

So…

Um…

…well, I think Lenore will be happy. Good for her.

Anyway, this has been a seriously long explanation. Thanks for reading this far.

[emersonfreepress]

help i'm alive

So! Long time, no see. 2023 was a whole goddamn lot lol

I don't have a demo update to share yet, but that's because I had to scrap nearly everything I managed to write during a very, very, very bad stint of writer's block last year. I hadn't even realized it had been a block like that until I went over my work so far last month and realized it was bad -- like, trust me; a slog to read that didn't even sound like me. It's been extremely frustrating but I've finally broken free of that and it's been easy and actually fun to write again for the first time in actual years. I just hate giving updates that have no actual news in them. And I really had nothing to share other than: I deleted thousands of words and feel so much better now 😅

Anyway, little about my demo plans have changed: I'm still putting out the Chapter 3 demos in Choicescript/on Dashingdon and then will be going dark to move things over to Twine. Where I am in the process right now is... feeling like 35% done with the overhauled version of this chapter and 50% done for the next demo update.

As far as asks, I'm... not really sure what to do?? I believe I've read them all (I love you guys), but so much time has passed since getting most of them that I'm not sure if it's, like... still pertinent??? To go back and answer them?? I suppose some of them like character asks could be, but all the nice messages of support -- that feels weird since I've practically ghosted this blog since August! Idk. Y'all tell me what to do with 'em and I'll do it. Maybe I should make a poll.

Uh... that's really all there is to say regarding the game! I've added some personal stuff after the cut, but if you're done here: Thanks for reading and sticking around. It means the world, for real.

So what has occupied my time all this time? Doctor, therapy, money, and friends. And improv! But especially the first two. There was a lot of non-writing related stuff fucking up my ability to focus and write, so hopefully with my mind and body both feeling a lot better, I can get back to being present and active with the game. I didn't realize how physically unwell I was until last year and it's been like... life-long issues I've been treating. It turns out it's not normal to feel exhausted enough to sleep at any given time, at all times, for your whole life! wow!!

I also uninstalled Tumblr from my phone back in February, so you could say I'm sort of generally focused on offline life. (And what an interesting coincidence that my writer's block dissipated shortly after that...) I also just moved!! The last two weekends have been so expensive and stressful -_- But I can't even compare the old place to the new. We're basically paying the same price for idek how much more space. The cats are so happy; which means the house humans get to be happy.

My schedule is finally freed up from constant medical shit (there was a 3-month stretch this winter with multiple doctor appointments literally every fucking week 🙃🙃🙃). My mental health is doing a lot better -- literally incomparably better compared to where I was this time last year. There's live comedy now (which I dabble in, to be clear lol), but I've finally found myself able to like... balance it all. The physical and creative energy that goes into it all, anyway. The lovely thing about improv is that you kinda just show up and do your thing -- it doesn't cut into my writing time so much as it costs energy. Unless I end up in this comedy debate show thing next month, which I am very excited to give up writing time for

So like... Life is life-ing and I'm just vibing. Or something? I'll be around.

Thank you all again so much for your interest, support, patience, and readership <3

[everlasting-rainfall]

AU called Yandere Society where basically it’s a world where our definition of normal love like bringing roses and being romantic and junk like that is seen as weird while things like murder, stalking, and creepy love notes are seen as the norm

Murder and a lot of crimes are legal in this world under specific circumstances like “Did you kill your darling? Jail” “Did you kill that man who was staring too long at your darling? Understandable, you’re innocent”. There probably is a better way to describe it but for now, I feel that works the best. Oh yeah! Also sex in public is legal as long as there are no minors around

There are also these people called Abnormals who find Yandere Love to be repulsive and creepy despite it being the societal norm, Abnormals only want to experience the type of normalized love from our world and are in constant danger as if they’re discovered then they get hit with a slew of things like “You can’t have these types of jobs” or “Mandated therapy” plus they tend to get harassed a lot and oddly seem to attract Yandere’s quite a lot

Abnormals can actually be “cured” though as if you give them enough therapy or even manage to pair them with just the right person, they’ll either develop Stockholm Syndrome or become a Yandere themselves

I NEED MORE !!! I’m already interested in this au , I wonder how will yandere strawhats react that there darling is a abnormal 👀🤔🙏

please if your not busy 💗

So flower friend, I actually am working on something like that at the moment. I currently have three of the Straw Hats done for it and I’m going to include Jinbei with it as well but not Chopper as he’s baby and underage

It’s not going to be done for a long time though as I’m working hard on it and Yandere Society can be hard for me to write at times especially if I’m having problems getting motivated

In the meantime, allow me to explain some things about the Yandere Society a bit better than I did last time…

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT-!

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

Murder, Crime, Violence, Implied Blood and Gore, Abuse Mention, Harassment, Potential Similarities to Homophobia (?), Public Sex, Noncon

!-POTENTIAL TRIGGER WARNINGS-!

!-MINORS DO NOT INTERACT-!

So as I said a lot of crimes in Yandere Society are perfectly legal under certain circumstances like you can kill someone but unless you had a “good” reason for doing so then you’re going to jail

Like the following things are innocent crimes in the eyes of the law in Yandere Society

A Yandere killed someone who was actively trying to harm their relationship with their Darling like seducing and trying to get them to cheat, it’s also innocent if the victim was trying to help the Darling escape their Yandere unless the Yandere was actively putting the Darlings life in danger

A Yandere killed someone who hurt their Darling, the Yandere will also be seen as innocent if they helped another Yandere kill someone that hurt their Darling or if the Yandere was saving the Darling from an abusive situation by killing the Abused Darling’s Yandere

I feel like that’s a good example and I hope it was easy to follow now here are examples of some of the things that will get you locked up in Yandere Society

So if a Yandere kills their Darling whether their S/O was a Yandere or Abnormal, that will get the guilty Yandere locked up tight and cause them to never see the light of day again, the only exception to this is if the Guilty Yandere had no other choice or it was an accident

If the Yandere goes on to kill everyone in their Darling’s life like friends and family, that’s seen as ridiculous in the eyes of the law in Yandere Society as most people are Yandere’s too and would approve of the relationship, the only exception to this is if it were to protect their Darling

I hope that these were good examples and that they were easy to follow

As for Abnormals, Abnormals aren’t allowed to do a lot of things as I said and it’s by law mandated that they have to attend therapy in order to turn them into Yandere’s like everyone else and this therapy isn’t too bad as it’s just sitting down and having a conversation like there’s no electroshock or anything like that, maybe a few exercises but nothing too intense

Abnormals typically hide the fact that they’re Abnormals as they don’t want anyone to find out as if they do, there’s that mandated therapy thing but they also get a ton of restrictions like they can’t have certain jobs

If you are a known Abnormal in Yandere Society, you are not allowed to be the following. Teacher of Any Kind, Any Sort of Government Job, Any Sort of Job involving Mental Health. Also you can’t attend college but Abnormals have been known to sneak in and attend

The harassment that an Abnormal can face is usually based on Yandere’s stalking them and being after them as they attract Yandere’s more easily than other Yandere’s do but it’s also from the government as well as you’re likely to get way more mail to encourage you to just accept a Yandere into your life or become one

But this will all change the second that an Abnormal either develops Stockholm Syndrome for a Yandere or becomes a Yandere themselves

Also Two Abnormals are not allowed to be in a relationship, if they wish to do so then they will need to hide it from the public as it’s illegal like I don’t think you’ll straight up be sent to prison over it but you will be forcefully separated

As for how someone can tell if someone is a Yandere, typically these Yandere tendencies make themselves known in early childhood and it can be tested by trying to take their toys or watching how they interact with friends but the best way is to have them take a test which depending on how they did can tell you if they’re a Yandere or an Abnormal

There are late bloomers in Yandere Society who don’t show any Yandere Tendencies until they’re older but the test can distinct between a full Abnormal or a Late Bloomer

There’s also this thing that me and a friend came up with called Yvette Newgate Syndorme and it’s where someone has experienced something or a string of events that led to them not being able to process their Yandere feelings properly and it leads to things like this

“Hey, do you like this thing?” “Yes” “Do you want this thing?” “Yes” “Ok then take it” “Nevermind” “Ok then I’m taking it” “No, give it to me… It’s mine and you can’t have it…” “Ok, here” “Nevermind”

There is therapy for it but so far, it hasn’t really been successful like it’s helped but there’s been no real breakthroughs like there have been for Abnormals

Also for the sex in public thing, that’s perfectly acceptable and seen as completely legal like no one bats an eye if they see people having sex in public

No one even gives too much of a shit if it’s a Yandere with an Abnormal unless the Abnormal belongs to a different Yandere as if that’s the case then people are stepping in and law enforcement will be called

Besides that, it’s very illegal if its done where minors can see you as well

As for other things, it’s actually not uncommon for someone to just be sitting in on a business call with a bunch of other people meanwhile they’re being ruthlessly fucked by their partner like they’re naked with private parts potentially on full display and no one bats an eye

Just remember to mute your microphone as it’s seen as very rude to not do so and if you’re asked a question then you’re allowed to unmute to answer it probably while moaning but afterwards you have to mute again

Plus if you’re being fucked in a video call then it might encourage other people to start getting it on with their partners and will potentially weed out the Abnormals in the workplace as they’ll be the only ones who look uncomfortable with it

Anyways I think that’s all! I’ll attempt to put out the Yandere Straw Hat thing soon but no promises! Have a good day and I hope that I was able to explain things well!

[tokoyamisstuff]

gn! Reader (that's what adoption is for) I no warnings

A/N: we all aggree those guys need to have some serious therapy before even thinking about children, right?!

Alucard

While I think this is probably not his only child over the past decades, it's the first one he is actively involved in it's upbringing.

At the beginning he's cautious to even hold it and never wants to be left alone with it, partly feeling like he doesn't deserve to be close to such a pure little miracle and deeply afraid to mess something up. He's already fearing it'll grow up to hate him one day, will needs lots of reassurement.

Super overprotective due to his own experiences as a child. Only a chosen few will be allowed to even interact with it. I feel in general you'll need to make him loosen up and act as counterweight to his extremes.

Will probably spoil it rotten and doesn't care about the consequences. It's his child, after all, others don't matter!

The Captain

100% relies on his instincts and sees how things develop naturally.

His quiet and collected aura is contagious for the baby, and in general he deals with tantrums etc. way better than you.

Will teach them sign language for obvious reasons, but doesn't even need to make a sound to get them to (not) do something - one look is enough.

He knows best how fast time can pass, so he tries savouring every moment with your little family. You blink and suddenly they're all grown up.

Sorry, but your kids will definetly be clinging to their dad more than you.

Plus his wolf form will be a great cuddle buddy!

Anderson

C'mon you guys this man is a dad already.

Pretty confident in his parenting skills due to his work at the orphanage. He's seen it all, done it all, knows it all. Can be a bit overbearing but he only means well.

Is a completely different person while tending to children in general, like way calmer and legitimately enjoying himself. Watching him play, sing and cuddle with them is a heartwarming sight, really. His dad-jokes are horrendrous, though.

The only thing he's worried about is that the orphans might think he loves them less now that he has a child of his own, but you're gonna prove them otherwise. And hey, so many friends for your little one!

Fuck vampire-hunting, this is what he's born for.

The Major

Oh, he's definetly one of those super prepared ones that got the child's room set up when you're like 3 weeks pregnant.

Definetly educates them early on, they'll know several languages as babies already and shit like that. He's strict and has high expectations but remains loving nonetheless.

Is aware of his own shortcomings especially when it comes to empathy and other things that require emotional intelligence, and will gladly ask your assistance if necessary.

Has a surprisingly great humor and plays very carefree unlike his usual self. At home he's just a papa.

Walter

Oh you don't have to lift a single finger, he's got you.

He'll go all househusband mode, this is what he's dreamt of doing all his life. Let him have this. If you'd wish you only have to do the 'fun' part of parenting because he's thrilled doing everything, no exceptions.

Really is a family-man that would plan trips, photo-shootings, certain classes, the whole package. Carries the child anywhere, it literally doesn't have to walk unless it wants to.

Might teach it some self-defense but is in general absolutely against training it in his field of work. He's very insistent on making your child experience a normal childhood full of wonder, unlike his own.

[bakersimmer]

One could immediately sense the cozy atmosphere by stepping inside Dr. Olivia Vella's office. The room was bathed in the gentle glow of a floor lamp, casting warm shadows on the walls adorned in pastel hues. It was a carefully crafted sanctuary for unraveling the intricacies of the mind. Dr. Vella herself was a reflection of the serenity of her office. Her presence radiated a genuine warmth that invited trust as if she were a guide ready to accompany others on their journey of self-discovery.

Despite the comforting ambiance, Laila found herself on edge. The walls seemed like they were closing in on her. The floor lamp's warm glow was like a spotlight. The sofa felt like it was made of pins and needles. Laila thought with horror how these would be the longest 50 minutes of her life.

Olivia: (sensing Laila's discomfort) It's okay to feel uncomfortable. You know, when I first sought therapy, I felt like the room was trying to swallow me. I kept fidgeting because it felt like the only way to keep me from sinking inside the chair. Laila: (gives Olivia a skeptical look) Olivia: Why don't you tell me what brings you here today?

Laila: (guarded) I'm here only because my husband thinks I can't handle my problems. Olivia: I appreciate your honesty. It takes courage to come here, even if it's not by choice. Can you share a bit about what's been happening in your life? I'm here to listen, not to judge or push you into something you're not ready for. Laila: (crosses her arms) I don't need to spill my guts to a stranger. I've handled things just fine on my own. Olivia: I understand you might feel that way. We don't have to go to your deepest thoughts. Maybe we can start with something more surface-level, like what's been on your mind lately?

Laila: (pauses, then reluctantly) My husband thinks I'm crazy and need fixing. But I'm not broken. I don't need him or some stranger poking around in my head. Olivia: (nods understandingly) It sounds like a lot of pain and frustration surrounds your relationship with your husband. Laila: (irritated) I'm frustrated because he's cheating and refuses to admit it! First, he started telling me how I needed help, then suddenly, he just packed up his things and left, like I had done something wrong. Now he refuses to talk to me unless I come here twice a week…

Olivia: That's undoubtedly a challenging situation. Could you share when you first started having doubts about your husband's fidelity? Laila: It's been building up for a while. He's been staying late at work or finishing up work things until early morning and then sleeping on the couch. Also, he's always on his phone. He has liked his job since day one, but less than he does now. And I know how he works. So, saying he needs more time to finish things doesn't apply to him. Olivia: It must be incredibly distressing to witness these shifts. Have you tried expressing your worries to him directly? Laila: He claims he's just working, providing a better life for us... building his legacy... But I know him. He's slipping away, and I can't understand why.

previous / beginning / next

[bitchy-craft]

How To Get To Your Fullest Potential | Pick A Pile

Hello and welcome to this Pick A Pile! In here you'll find out how you can get to your highest and fullest potential. I hope you guys enjoy and find this useful. Do make sure to leave comments down below on your experience! I do want to remind you all that this is a General Pick A Pile which means this is for a lot of people: therefore keep what resonates and leave what doesn't.

Masterlist

Pick A Pile!

Pile 1:

Stand your ground and be confident. Don’t compare you self to others unless it is to see how you can improve on the things you love. You need to never give up to get to your fullest potential, how cliché it may sound. You need to work hard and take people’s ideas into account. Don’t stand your ground on every idea and wish you want, be open to be influenced by people around you, things around you. You may not like having people give other ideas and opportunities, but you need to realize that people helping can get you greater and greater.

You need to be able to be open to new ideas and opportunities, accept that people can think different and that their ideas can be amazing. And when you have a goal in mind, don’t hold back, go for it, do everything you want for it, throw all your energy into it, as long as you enjoy yourself and don’t get worn out.

Pile 2:

Put yourself first. You need to be able to know where your boundaries lie and know what you need to be able to thrive. Some things may overwhelm you, so make sure you don’t get too overwhelmed, avoid getting into things that make you uncomfortable or don’t want. Don’t settle, do what you need to do and achieve what you want.

You might carry a lot of stress with you, and that is okay, unless it holds you back or gets you worse grades than you are able to get. Find out what you need to relax yourself, find out what you need to get through life comfortable, rid all the things that don’t serve you and hold you back. Find yourself, find what kind of person you are, do what you love and do what you need to do to protect yourself from all the things around you.

Don’t think you’re alone on this, there are people around you that might need the same thing, and there are definitely people around you that can help you go through your journey the best way possible.

Pile 3:

Accept what comes your way, even if you might feel a bit unsure about the idea, as long as it isn’t dangerous of course. If people ask you to hang out with them and you want to get to know more people, do it. If you want to go to a certain college but you’re not sure because of the distance, do it. If you want to quit your job to continue with school or start over again, do it if you have enough resources.

Don’t feel pressured because of your family, your neighbourhood, the expectations that have been put on you. Ignore those, how hard it may be. Work on the affects that this pressure gave you, which might have to be done with possible therapy or talking to other people about it.

It may be difficult, it may be hard to make those decisions, but if you truly want to do something, how scary it may be, go for it.  

[x-other-souled-x]

No. Nope.

Using language that systems may also use in a medical setting to describe their expereinces and go through treatment is not appropriation. Full stop.

There is no culture being exploited, unless you want to argue that the medical-industrial complex is a closed culture somehow.

Which I have definitely seen posts saying something dangerously close to this, and I urge you to not base your entire sense of self on the guys making money off of you. Even if they're helping, there's intentional siphoning of money from poor patients.

Secondly, language is a tool used to communicate. Words exist as "bodies" to a concept, and sometimes this concept is interpreted a little differently from person to person. There are a lot of words that mean several different things depending on the context. The most important thing is the setting which they're used in. A good ammount of medical terms are also words that are used by laymen in other contexts, meaning something different.

A system is a group of interrelated parts working together as a whole.

An Operating System (OS) is a system of code and software that tells the hardware what to do in order to make your computer run. There's agricultural systems, government systems, the solar system itself. Are these things appropriating the medical-industrial complex by existing as parts that make one whole thing work?

And before anyone splits hairs about this, I am not equating human life to computers or the government. These are examples of things that are literally defined AS SYSTEMS. The main takeaway you should be having here is that system is a broad term with many many applications outside of the medical-industrial complex. That one institution does not own the word nor the concept of being multiple parts (headmates/alters/whatever) working together.

The concept still exists and system still is a word outside of a medical context.

In other words, people would have eventually came to the conclusion of calling themselves systems regardless of if it was used in a medical context or not. It's not hard to put 2 and 2 together, to see parallels in concepts and expereinces and decide those words work just fine. Thank you for coming to my TEDtalk.

This is a post online, made by a trauma-formed system. I'm not going to have the time and foresight to cover every little nuance, and I don't care to be pedantic and pick apart small case instances. At the end of the day, this does not actually matter to how I live my life, how I get therapy, how we as a system have to work together. Endos using terms that are also used in a medical setting (but also used outside of medical settings) is not harmful to me in any way. And quite frankly, I think anti-endo witchunting has done more damage to us as a system trying to figure out how to navigate life than any endo friendly post has. I'm not arguing semantics, I'm going to go live my life and go outside and do my job and pay my bills like everyone else.

All this discourse around stealing terms and what you can and can't call yourself is so seriously unimportant in the grand scheme of things. You all sound so comfy and privileged to be worried about something so trivial as a word or three that is used in multiple contexts accross human language.

[demvalhaken]

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!! Just some super cool arts

If I EVER had the patience to write and draw the Catecis comic, it’d look like this

This is just a grasshopper sailor out on the Waspian port

I was thinking about naming him Sir. Irian like the Iris flower. The thing is I have to differentiate him from Iris, a male monarch Butterfly across the entire world. Or Sir. Astroway as his last name is Astroway due to his sailor family using stars as a way to travel.

About my long break: Look guys, I haven’t been doing well mentally. I am in a depressive state, I am sleep deprived, I am done with life. To draw so much and pour your time and skill into an artwork only for a few likes can be frustrating. I don’t post my art for fame or love, I do it to share my ocs and ideas, I don’t want the masses to flock, I just want recognition for my work. I didn’t really mean to take a break, I get distracted very easily and forget to post. I wish I could post more but art takes time, I have to develop ideas and passion due to my constant art block and burnout. The only good thing in my life is just being alive. There is a large scar on my neck because I gave myself a friction burn with my lanyard at school due to anxiety :( I have mental problems, whatever I have, it isn’t good and will probably slowly deteriorate me to a depressive glob of my former self, but I will never get diagnosed. My family is constantly angry at me for no reason, I get that my clean obsessed behaviour can get annoying especially when I panic and get water everywhere, but I hate to be yelled at for something that I cannot control or fix. They say I am overreacting and will got over it, but I’ve tried, there is no fixing this. That’s why I’ll probably never ever get a diagnosis or therapy session. I lied, I am actually not as okay as I say I am. If I ever don’t post for a period time, please know that it’s either from lack of art or mental issues. I am sorry for not posting in awhile as my usual breaks take a time of 3 days or 2. I am deeply sorry.

Bevel, Snow, and Berry.

I drew these in my math book, very classic place to doodle, I know. There’s not a lot of doodles in my book though, I am usually trying to do equations and get an 100 on my test

I finally got a haircut, though my hair is now a short messy thing, I feel quite confident even if I don’t fully look masculine. My arm hair should be quite an indicator and the trans pin inside my backpack, haha! That pin was made by a friend of mine, don’t worry he’s very fruity and slay. Idk if it’s just my senses but my hairdresser was definitely an ally, he slayed, my hair is hairing. Also I have giant eyebags and a cowlick, like I literally have Dem’s cowlick.

Here’s some more little oc ideas. Eclipse is my first transfem oc, I know I know I’m slaying. She’s has a twin sister, Luna! Yes, Eclipse and Luna are Hornet twins, from the same egg btw. I still don’t know how it works, I’m too tired to research though. Arctic and Viper are a married couple, I like to think Arctic is just a lesbian and her/his wife is a crazy queen with schizophrenia who totally didn’t kill her family. They’re both from Bloodlust’s time period, though a little older.

I don’t want to talk about it… This is really gross but because Snow’s family wanted to keep the bloodline “pure” she’s SHORT and albino but like literally no one else in her family is albino… poor Snow… GUYS DONT MARRY YOUR SIBLINGS AND COUSINS… Bevel transmasc headcannon, I’m not making it cannon yet because Bevel is a lesbian.

Layze, Funkyfrogbait, and Bevel with one tooth

@purpledemonss asked for this minus Bevel, that was my idea

OKAY I LOVE YOU GUYS SM, EAT THIS UP, STAY A MENACE TO SOCIETY JUST DONT EAT LEATHER UNLESS YOU ARE DEATHLY STARVED

[foster-the-world]

Great Gatsby

My Mom, Aunt and I saw the Great Gatsby last night. Great show. Amazing costumes and scenes as you would expect. We got $24 tickets we get through Bee's ice skating program. My husband and I will go see Water for Elephants next month. The Classical theater of Harlem is also having free nightly outdoor performance of a midsummers night dream - which looks like a fun adaption. Thinking of taking the girls next week. I think it has lots of glitzy costumes and dancing. It doesn't start until 8:30 but I think we can go for the first half. As a kid my mom had weekly tickets to the Muny - a huge outdoor theater. All of the kids went to the kids show once a summer. Fond memories.

The girls start science camp next week. They love Camp Half blood/sword camp so much. So much imagination. They are bummed its over but they did science camp and liked it last summer.

We are scheduled to go to Banff and Jasper National Parks the end of August. We always do our summer vacation then because camps end but school doesn't start. Turns out two other people at work also want that week off. They may tell me no. Which is fine. So far I've only booked cancelable lodging. We will figure out childcare and go the week before. We may end up switching destinations because we will no longer have the extra labor day Monday off. Its a pretty pricey flight so I don't want to go if we don't have enough time. Maybe Columbia? We will make it to Banff someday.

Talked with baby boy's new school OT and PT. They said he's doing great. He's so used to doing therapies that he has no problems going with new people. PT mentioned the inability to slow down is his problem. Not news to us. Let's hope they can help.

Was reading the NYT's article about the study that says children's moving anytime between the age of 10 and 16 has really detrimental long term effects. For obvious reasons loosing your close knit community during that age is difficult. Here in NYC because of school choice kids can go across town for Junior high and then to a totally different location with no one they know for High School. In addition to the (unhealthy, I think) stress of applications, etc I do wonder if it would have the same negative outcomes. Maybe that's just common practice everywhere now? Where I grew up Jr High was everyone you went to Elementary school with and then three other elementary schools. High school was everyone from your Jr High. I def went from Kindergarten through Graduation with many of the same people.

In my circles everyone believes social media is the cause of teenagers mental health problems - which I believe. But I also think kids having so much less freedom contributes. Its tricky in NYC - as I can't send my kids out to their neighbors backyard - but I try to give the girls freedom as much as possible. Baby boys only four but unless his personality changes I think it will be even more difficult to give him freedom.

Here's to hoping Biden drops out in the next few days. Let's all buy the man a drink, give him a big thank you and let him live out his days in peace. Job well done. Lots of room for improvement but overall A+ in my book.

[honeytonedhottie]

quality of life‧₊˚✩彡🎐

this post is a collaboration with @prettieinpink my lovely mutual <3 so make sure to check out ur page for the continuation of this post and it has been a PLEASURE to work with her! go and follow her <3

HEALTH : ur health is easily the most important of these categories and ur own health must be prioritized in every thing that u do. health is wealth, and without health, ur quality of life will be very low.

eat foods that are good for u and that nourish you, pay close attention to ur body and how it reacts to certain foods cuz everyones body is different and u should have a vast knowledge on your own body and how it works. eat a variety of fruits and vegetables. a helpful ratio in eating that i like to use as a basic guideline is (80% of the time, eat healthier foods and 20% of the time eat what u crave)

stay hydrated and drink between 1-3 liters of water a day, about 15 minutes before u go to sleep drink a couple glasses of water, drinking water before bed literally CLEANSES you, it improves ur skin, helps ur heart pump blood more efficiently, and improves blood pressure and heart rate, which affects ur quality of sleep in a positive way

to continue on the note of ur sleep u should be sleeping 8-10 hours of sleep a night. sleep deprivation is NOT cute, so please opt to sleep at an earlier time and rise at an earlier time as well

aside from what u consume, take care of ur health by taking supplements, drinking lots of teas, sleeping enough, stretching ur body, dry brushing, lymphatic drainage massage etc

MENTAL WELL BEING : september is suicide prevention month so i feel like now is an AMAZING time to bring up mental health and ways that u can improve ur mental state of being.

i always talk about self concept and i always will because self concept truly is the foundation of everything. ur whole entire life is literally ur mindset. keeping a positive outlook, meditating and practicing gratitude sounds cliche but it does wonders for ur happiness.

understand that its okay to NOT feel happy 24/7 because happiness is simply a feeling, and feelings are fleeting. they dont stay forever. i talked about the science of dopamine and what it does to ur brain in a previous post but some things that u can do to improve ur happiness levels are :

cutting back on social media and screen time in order to experience the world around you

surrounding urself with people who build you up

consuming social media that impacts ur mental health in a positive way

if u can, invest in therapy and if u can't do some shadow work, and based on ur discoveries with shadow work use the resources that u have (like youtube) to learn how to heal from ur trauma properly. healing isn't an overnight process, its a journey but it will DRASTICALLY improve ur quality of life.

find ways to cope and deal with ur emotions in a healthy way if ur going through a hard time, if ur going thru a REALLY hard time please go and seek help bcuz u dont deserve to live in a constant state of sadness, and if u ever need encouragement my inbox is always open 💗

PHYSICAL APPEARANCE : ur physical appearance can greatly impact ur quality of life also so here's some way to maximize ur looks:

sleep, drink water, and walk everyday - the best way to be pretty is to be healthy so make sure ur taking care of ur nutrition and ur sleep schedule

skincare - build a solid skincare routine and be consistent with it, do ur skincare RELIGIOUSLY 2x a day and dont touch ur face with ur hands unless ur washing ur face. double cleanse and dont forget to apply spf &lt;33

haircare - learn what ur hair texture is and watch influencers or people who share the same hair texture as u and watch how they take care of their hair. once u know ur hair type then ur hair will thrive and be healthy

clean nails, long or short its all a matter of preference but keep ur nails clean and done nicely

wearing clothes that fit and complement ur body nicely, get ur clothes tailored to fit ur body comfortably

take good care of ur hair to keep it healthy, and learn how to do ur hair in cute hairstyles.

lastly POSTURE will tie all of this together, ofc these categories were rly broad but u can totally look into them more to maximize ur own looks and beauty

i know dear peachie on youtube has AMAZING makeup tips especially if ur a beginner she can teach u a lot

GENERAL : this is just a broad category of helpful things that u can do to improve the quality of ur life.

manifestation : when u learn about the way that the world works and operates and how ur mind creates ur own reality u will literally step into the power of knowing that you create. start committing to ur dream life and learning about law of assumption

finding little things to be happy about : i feel my happiest when im consciously living. and what i mean about this most of us just live our lives on autopilot out of necessity or habit, but paying closer attention to our lives and our experiences and romanticizing our lives will improve the quality of ur life

decision making : make decisions that will give the quality of life that u wanna live. for the future, make decisions that are good for ur future self instead of just focusing on making decisions that only look good in that one moment. ofc this differs depending on the situation but make an effort to make smart decisions that'll set the foundation for ur future

go check out @prettieinpink for the next part of this post <;3