#unironically one of my favorite things ever

[velvetvexations]

It's amazing how quickly I've started seeing triggering shit. I thought it would take a little while for things to really start moving, like, that it'd take a bit of time for them to cut the ribbon on the first death camp, but no immediately it's this and this and this. Truly inescapable now.

If you ever said the words "99% Hitler" unironically I hate you worse than the fascists themselves, honestly. Fucking rich idiots living in your safe blue states. Virtue signaling clout-obsessed motherfuckers. Vapid superficial morons who couldn't care about a single other person in their life depended on it. You will always be more personally offensive to me than than any MAGA guy because they're the way they are and there's very little we can do about that, but when did you become this miserable, disgusting thing you are? Were you always just wearing the skin of progressive values or did the light in your eyes go out when you realized how popular contrarian politics are? Tankie motherfuckers want so badly to be the ones cannibalizing their neighbors like in the Cultural Revolution but they know that's never happening and are just grifting to fuel their endless egos.

I'm sorry, this is just going to make my life like, a regular hell, and I already struggled so badly with depression and a million other things, it was so hard just dealing with things on the state level. I saw something about Meta's new hateful content policy* and I'm kinna going insane at the level of dystopia we're entering when things looked so bright and hopeful just ten years ago. I want to compare this to the past and how we lived through that, but even back when I was a kid and queers were outsiders we weren't being targeted this extensively. Being on the margins was better than being dragged out into the town square and publicly executed.

And already people are like..."well Trump only mentioned trans women" like hey does it...does it feel good to see something like that and then immediately run to your favorite dying social media website to weaponize it against other queers? Do you realize that's what you're doing? You're using the brutalization of your "sisters" as a cudgel because you've decided other trans people are a good target to soothe your insecurity and puff yourself up, and when you do talk about stuff that actually harms us it's purely to use as a sword in that bullshit crusade.

I don't know how to end this post. I'm scared and exhausted. I want to die but I'm just going to go back to bed instead and listen to this six hour Signalis video and pretend that nothing else exists.

*don't talk to me about it

[roadunk1ll]

I’m back on my bs (yuzuru hanyu inspired Tim figure skater brain rot) he occupies my mind 24/7

[serpercival]

whatever insane cowboy episode I've been having lately continues. More Stagecoach West fic (smut flavored) be upon ye

Mr. Murchison was happy to put Davey up in a room at the inn for free, but that courtesy hadn’t been extended to Luke or Simon. Meant they were sleeping in a tent on the land they’d bought together, or sometimes under the stars if the wind wasn’t too harsh. Trouble was, they only had the one tent. And for all that Luke could put on a show about appreciating women when the time came to press it, sleeping only a few feet away from a man who was kind and good with the bluest eyes he’d ever seen wasn’t doing him any favors in the lack of privacy situation.

Rating: E Fandom: Stagecoach West Word Count: 2.5k Relationship(s): Simon Kane/Luke Perry Characters: Luke Perry, Simon Kane Additional Tags: First Time, Frottage

[katagawajr]

watched saw x. quite enjoyable movie. shawnee smith the woman you are.. literally acting the roof off like the rent was due 😭

[thebrassbat]

"..." - Vy at Ruby

"Square up, punk."

[maverickflare]

david what is your least favourite keyblades and why

HMMMM good question.

generally i fucking loathe any of the neverland keyblades mostly bc they remind me tht peter pan exists and then i feel a deep rage in my bones but other than thaaaaaaaat.......

in terms of designs i think the nightmare before christmas themed ones are kind of lame :/ its just tht i generally dislike the aesthetic of the movie and subsequent oversaturation of it has given me a distaste for them. theyre well designed keyblades i just dont care for them ! kind of lame !

oh ! i also dont care for All for One, i think its a particularly boring looking keyblade in a game that has some of the most fun/silly keyblade designs. and part of that is bc its three musketeers themed and i just think it had very little to work w . so its like down in the bottom of my keyblade ranking bc its just. not so good comparatively.

[freakylittlestarcreature]

I literally just heard their voice in a voice message and vibrated a little out of a nice, butterfly-y, calm happiness that just came over me. Teehee

Istg I was built to be a cringe little simping lovergirl. I can't wait to have the social energy to worship and generally get with them again ackkbualubud.

I may be away from my goddess, but it appears their day-making light manages to rival the sun in brilliance nonetheless.

[mad-hunts]

symptoms worsening over time not being a good sign whenever you were about 90% sure you had a concussion was a fact that barton was devastatingly aware of right now; for there was absolutely no way that they could go to the hospital despite that he was really starting to feel wrong. the staff would probably turn both barton and jervis in the exact moment they walked through the door, despite any attempts to intervene that matilda might try to make. and he didn't want to put her in a position like that either. so, he guessed he'd just have to try to stay awake until they got to their place in the east end. which couldn't be that hard — right?

except barton only registered that the other man was rushing napkins towards him at the last second, so he almost didn't even catch them in time to put them up to his nose. he had to tilt his head at jervis just to see him properly in the first place since he was now seeing double. a exasperated groan left his lips as he murmured a soft 'thanks' before covering one of his eyes to see if that would help. it didn't, unfortunately. matilda decided from then on that she was about to break every single traffic law if she had to to get them home asap. there was nothing that she could do for him here, after all, but the abandoned car workshop had all kinds of medical equipment in it.

blood was staining the napkins that jervis had given barton like crazy in the meantime. he knew that there was a way to stop a nosebleed, but it took him a moment to remember it... matilda noticing that her father was putting more of his weight on her than before. and all she could think to that was thank god she was strong, because even halfway carrying someone? it was a lot harder than it looked. matilda gritted her teeth and looked back at the front doors as she was about a quarter of the way to the ones in the back; the police officers seeming to just be getting out of their vehicles now. ❝ come on, jervis! don't make me regret letting you come along. ❞ she watched on in silence as the person who was soon going to be their guest packed up his things.

then, the two mathises were off again, matilda not having anymore time to quote unquote 'waste' as she'd put it standing around for jervis. barton closed his eyes as a severe pain right in the area that his daughter was pushing on hit him and his voice ever-so-slightly took on a shaky tone, ❝ ahh, merde, bon sang*... matilda! i've got a popped rib so move your arm more up while you're helping me, please. ❞ matilda's eyes widened as if to say 'oh' before she did just that. the adrenaline was starting to hit barton in particular now as he was walking a lot less unsteadily now, when a few seconds ago, he seemed rather off-balance. he supposed that was one of the good things about it: as the rush does enhance your physical abilities.

they were reaching the door now, and right on time, because the cops seemed to be right on the precipice of coming into view of them. matilda dared to grab onto jervis's upper arm afterwards and pulled him outside with them seemingly in sync of the front doors to the restaurant opening. ❝ oh my god, am i going to need a drink once we get home. a heavily alcoholic one. we're in this old green jaguar over here. ❞ she stated this to both jervis and barton while she rushed to the car, settling barton in the passenger seat so she could keep a better eye on him. matilda started up the car and waited for jervis to get in before saying, ❝ okay, so i'm going to need for both of you to put your heads down as much as possible because even when we leave this place, we aren't going to be totally safe. can you do that? ❞

barton let out another groan before nodding slightly, ❝ yeah, yeah. i'll do... whatever it takes for us to get out of here without being arrested. ❞ he lowered his body down as much as possible to avoid being seen. jeez, what a mess, barton thought. whatever happened to the days where he was as happy as a clam and keeping so well out of trouble, that the batman didn't even know who he was?

Matilda's announcement, coupled with the rather alarming blanching of Barton's complexion and the blood dripping out of his nose, was enough to light a metaphorical fire beneath Jervis' seat. With a sudden burst of energy, he practically launched himself out of the chair, hastily snatching the napkins to catch the mirage of trickling blood that stained his lips and chin.

Ridiculously, he couldn't stop the flood of technical terms and phrases related to head trauma that he had absorbed from countless articles and chapters in the days following Alice's injury. The information raced through his mind too quickly for him to fully process.

'A blow to the head can rupture the delicate blood vessels within the nasal cavity. This can occur due to a direct impact, such as a fall or collision, or from indirect forces, such as whiplash or rotational movements of the head -- particularly in cases where there is a history of trauma or the injury occurred in conjunction with symptoms such as a headache, dizziness, or confusion.'

Shoving the napkins into his pockets, he swiftly placed another handful into Barton's outstretched hand before Matilda guided him away. It was all a blur, a whirlwind that left no time for leisurely detours. His heart pounded loudly in his ears as he glanced furtively back over his left shoulder, like a rabbit who had caught a whiff of the approaching hounds.

No. He refused to return to Arkham. Not again. To hell with the coppers. He would sink his teeth into them if he had to. They would never take him back there.

'All the world will be your enemy, and whenever they catch you, they will kill you. But first they must catch you.'*

The intensity of his thoughts startled him, foolishly and wildly. After all, his actions in the van should have proven that he was beyond such things. But no. It was undeniable, what they had done to Marty and his partner. Jervis couldn't deny the evidence. He had crossed a line, and there was no way to undo it. Sooner or later, he would have to face the consequences, a wergild* to pay.

Snapping the cane shut, its joints clicking as it folded, Jervis tossed it into his bag. He swiftly retrieved his glove from the table, where it had been carelessly discarded next to the falooda, and pulled it back on with a satisfying crunch of leather. Sliding his bag over his shoulder, his right hand instinctively slipped back inside his coat, tracing the outline of the plush bunny's ear. Adrenaline coursed through his veins, even as a nagging sense of guilt gnawed at him.

A surge of bile rose in his throat, sharp and bitter. It seemed like he was caught between a rock and a hard place. There was no denying the gravity of his situation as he trailed behind the Mathises. How did Shakespeare phrase it again? Ah, yes…

'Our strong arms be our conscience, swords our law. March on, join bravely, let us to't pell-mell. If not to heaven, then hand in hand to hell.'

Footnotes:

From Richard Adams' "Watership Down" (1972).

Wergild - A historical term designating the value set in Anglo-Saxon and Germanic law upon human life in accordance with rank and paid as compensation to the kindred or lord of a slain person and to prevent a blood feud.

Richard III, Act 5, Scene 3.

[glassrowboat]

Lights! Camera! Headcanons! Reca.

SFW collection of silly HCs!

- Little Miss Frog is only ever oiled by Reca. He doesn't trust anyone else to be as thorough with her joints as he is.

- Reca has multiple hats for his favorite assistant director, it's just the one we see her wearing all the time is her favorite

- If for some reason you ever needed to switch shoes with Reca, he would gladly do so. After all, what kind of love interest would he be if he couldn't even do that much? The only problem is that he looks better in your heels than you ever have.

- He has a pair of shades with a print of old TV static on the lenses. They are not practical at all but he still uses them.

- This man does not know the meaning of the word subtlety

- You're getting atrocious petnames 24/7, to the point you even begin to think he's forgotten your actual name. It's always love muffin this, honey bear that- and if you ever jokingly refer to yourself as one of them it might as well become a part of Reca’s daily vocabulary.

- He has had multiple people in the past pointing a remote at him to see if they could pause the YouTube play button in his eyes. Now, whenever he sees someone holding one close to him, Reca just snatches it because he's that fed up.

- The button can change, but he's never telling you how it works.

- “The mystery only compels you further to my character, sweetie pie.”

- Please do not trust this man with cooking. He's more of an order in kind of guy and trust that that's preferable over letting him near a stove, oven, or even a microwave on some days. However, he will set the table and clean the dishes for you- it just might take a while because he's busy editing a script.

- Has picked up tons of little facts over the years from all the research he's put behind films. You could ask the most random questions and he'll undoubtedly have an answer- even if it concerns you how he knows how to dispose of a full body.

- On that note, Reca knows a good handful of the meanings behind names, so when someone introduces themselves to him, he usually ends up deciding if that “meaning” fits their character.

- Usually, it doesn't.

- Aka: Crew members

- It's easier that way.

- Those who are a regular part of his filming crew all carry earplugs with them now as a habit after having to listen to Reca's …excited shouting.

- He disapproves of relationships amongst the cast. There's always going to be issues working with people, but he doesn't need the entire film getting pushed aside because one couple had a fight! It’s utterly nonsensical to bring that onto his set. Save that for after everything has wrapped up.

- Anyone listen to Distractible and Markiplier’s entire stunt with lenses? Reca's worse. That's your only warning.

- After your first kiss, when Reca was walking back home, all self accomplished, he jumped up and cracked his feet together- completely unironically. He's not even ashamed about it, either.

- If Reca didn't start on Broadway as part of the crew, then he at least had some experience with it. (He was the theater kid in school). He knows a good couple of songs off the top of his head at this point, and when this one particular song comes on, he always has to stop himself from dancing.

- Owns a gramophone, but it only works half the time. Reca claims it's part of its charm….

- You've watched him mix redbull and coffee together only to drink it all down in a single sitting, then walk away without an explanation. That entire night he was yapping in your ear excitedly only to fall asleep on top of you as soon as it hit 4am.

- Reca tends to repeat the stories he's told you. He just loves them so much that he gets a little ahead of himself and forgets which ones he's shared, that's all. Plus, with his flair for the dramatic and tendency to add in a new line or two, it keeps things fresh.

- Reca affectionately pinches your nose using that baby voice of his. It’s supposed to be an affectionate gesture, in his own way, but it just comes across as annoying.

- Reca will pick you up and spin you around (just like the movies) but at the same time this man will happily let himself flop into your lap with a hand to his forehead so he can lament to you about his woes. Usually, this just means he wants attention.

- He gets busy with filming a lot, to the point you both can go up to a month without really getting anything more in than a one minute call. Usually, Reca is running around during these, or he's so close to passing out after a long day that you're left with the sound of him snoring on the other end of the line.

- Because he's famous, there are actually a good couple of edits and images of Reca made into memes you see when scrolling online.

- His handwriting is comically large. To the point it takes up so much space, Reca might as well be writing a signature instead of scrawling down notes to ensure he doesn't forget a fantastic idea.

- He writes his 7's with that little line crossing it.

- Reca is the type to grab your shoulder while he's laughing. And he does this whether you know him well or not.

[r0-boat]

Lucifer headcanons PLSPLSPLSPLSPLS (Maybe what most citizens of hell think of him? And how they and the kings react when mc gets close to him?) PLSPLSPLSPLSPLS

I'm not confident in my Lucifer headcanon's since I wrote that Lucifer breeding fic but heeeeeere hhhhh

Lucifer headcannons

NSFW&SFW

Lucifer was once an angel and as angels the assistance of God they help make humans and devils so it would make sense that Lucifer one of God's most prized angels would know a fair amount of human and devil anatomy.

Perhaps he became Hell's greatest doctor because he felt guilt of how much useless slaughter he and his brothers did. So, instead of killing, he wanted to help. And his subordinates, supportive of his dream, became healers and doctors with him.

However, he is still the demon of pride, and he wants to be your primary care doctor, and he will not sway his will. The Kings really don't fight him on this because, well, he is the right person to trust with your health.

My most favorite headcanon (and probably the least true, to be honest) is that since his fall, he is slowly learning about sex and sexual attraction. And you are playing a heavy hand on corrupting him, and he loves it. He was a pious angel; though not perfect to many of his brethren, he was considered highly regarded. And now look at him, fucking you till you cry in an act so obscene that it would make his brothers weep. Corruption kink Lucifer. Go brrr.

He wants to corrupt you, just like you corrupt him, but how do you corrupt someone who is already sinful filth/affectionate

Lucifer sees you as the perfect partner to try sexual acts with because he trusts you the most, and he likes you. That goes without saying. Unbeknownst to you, Lucifer is a fast learner. Once you teach him how to pleasure you, the next thing you know, he'll be making you writhe and scream.

Lucifer is a little bitey during sex. Especially when he is about to come, he clenches his teeth before to stop himself from sinking his fangs into your neck, but he can't help it. He needs to feel your soft skin in his mouth. His favorite places to bite are your neck and your thighs, other than your tears and your cum,. Your blood is the third favorite taste.

Lucifer is on the more serious side; jokes tend to bounce off his head. Especially ones made by younger devils... So much so that he gets angry when anyone mentions any word he cannot understand.

As the demon of pride it is his way or the highway. He can break any rule he wants but you, less you want to be a brat (please do He likes to punish). You may not break any rules of his.

Lucifer is as caring and gentle as he is strict; your tears frighten him just as much as it arouses him. He doesn't want to see you cry if it's not from pleasure. His gaze will grow soft, his voice deep and gentle, calling you cooing as he wipes away your tears.

He still has that little bit of animosity toward you He knows it is not your fault. He tells you straight up that it's because he is an angel. Even though most of it is mostly gone, he still gets a slight sickly pleasure from making you cry; He can't help it. He's a little bit of a sadist when he comes to you.

Everyone knows what Lucifer's penmanship looks like but no one can fucking read it. It's a mess of This is the most doctor shit you've ever seen. To you it just looks like an L and a squiggle written in a shimmering gold font (expensive fountain pen gift from Mammon)

Mammon likes Lucifer in a sort of "ooh, that man is pretty; never had an angel in my collection before." Where when Lucifer sees Mammon, it's mainly with Satan, so his first reaction is "God damn it not again."

He still calls you child of Adam or child of man And he still apologizes for it.

Lucifer is quite the romantic despite now becoming a devil, he thinks that hellborn devils should learn that sex is much sweeter when the tension is right. Basically his version of "these youngsters are still young SMH"

Lucifer unironically likes Twilight.

Lucifer texts like he is a character AI bot with perfect English and punctuation. Good luck trying to text him back because he knows nothing about text slang.

You annoy him so much and he loves it. You're so cute please keep pissing him off he'll still love you even when he kicks you out. He literally can't stay mad at you.

He's wondering how the fuck are you still alive You've been wondering that yourself all these years. Maybe that's why you so protective over your health now.

Dads you a lot. "You have to eat this finish your food it's healthy. Blah blah blah- too much screen time is bad for your eyes." "Blah blah blah-humans should get at least 8 hours of sleep Go to bed- blah blah blah." "Stop eating shitty foods and actually cook a decent meal-blah blah blah." at this point, calling him Daddy is becoming less of a joke.

Also Lucifer: buys you chocolates, takes you to fancy dinners.

Lucifer hates being called Daddy. And he hates that he's starting to like it; please stop.

[olivia-anderson-fanfic]

My dumbest TWST headcanons

Yuu: everyone has forgotten their name and preferred pronouns. No one is willing to ask after so long, hence everyone calling them 'prefect' all the time

Grim: he is the reason why no dorm has tried to get Yuu to transfer in. They simply do not want him and unfortunately they are a package deal

Riddle: cannot handle spice. He ate a bell pepper once and started sobbing incoherently. Bell peppers are notoriously non-spicy

Trey: has mom hands in that he can handle hot plates without even flinching because he has permanently ruined the nerve endings in his hands from all of the times he's handled hot baking trays without mitts

Cater: has only like 7 Magicam followers because, as fun as his tags are, they aren't great for the algorithm

Deuce: has been told "that's unfortunate" multiple times after introducing himself. Does not understand why. No one tell him.

Ace: the type to never wait for his food to finish cooling. He burns his tongue at least once a day. He will never learn. Nor will he ever actually taste anything he puts in his mouth. Uses this for bets ("bet you that I can eat *insert the most disgusting concoction ever*" "don't...")

Leona: the entire school has a group chat devoted to the most insane places they've found Leona sleeping. Nothing has managed to top the time someone spotted him curled up in a cauldron that the first years were about to use for Alchemy. (Ruggie has tried to bribe his way into this group chat multiple times but everyone is too scared of Leona to give it to him)

Ruggie: the type to dump trauma on you without realizing it's messed up. Jack asked him once "Where'd you get that" and pointed to a scar and Ruggie was like "oh yeah that's from the time a guy stabbed me" and Jack has never asked him anything since

Jack: complains constantly about how big his tail is because it keeps wagging and giving away his tsundere-ness. Wants a little tail he can stuff into his pant legs to hide it

Azul: his glasses are fake. He thinks they make him look intimidating

Jade: will make fun of people for yawning in front of him. ("Scandalous" "????") He refuses to explain

Floyd: bites people he likes. Moray eel bites can cause paralysis and even beyond that his teeth are wicked sharp. This has caused several misunderstandings in his life

Kalim: everyone know's he's coming because all of his jewelry clink against each other. Like a cat with a bell on its collar. There is a betting ring about whether Jamil planned for this or if it's just how Kalim is that has spread schoolwide

Jamil: has absolutely responded to Kalim saying "Treat spiders the way you want to be treated" with "Killed without hesitation". Unironically

Vil: has accidentally cursed his own food several times. Never anything serious, but you would think it was with the expression of utter horror on his face every time

Rook: is the one in class to deal with bugs. He will pull a hairband out of his pocket (saved for this very occasion, or in the horrible case that Vil's hair tie might snap) and snipe the bug out of midair

Epel: constantly tries to get away with breaking rules right under Vil's nose. Out of spite. He has yet to succeed, but insists he WILL. One day. He will not

Idia: has lamented sending his tablet to class several times because he can't play some of his favorite games when it's away. Does not seem to realize that he would not be able to play those games while in class anyways

Ortho: has programmed idle animations

Malleus: his horns constantly hit the top of doorways. The entire room will go very quiet when this happens because they're scared if they breathe they will laugh and they Can Not Laugh At Malleus Draconia

Lilia: upon finding out his true age, the first question he is always asked is how his cooking is seriously "like that"

Silver: will wake up, find a miscellaneous animal sleeping on him, and go back to sleep because he would rather die than wake up the poor thing

Sebek: banned from the school library. There is no librarian so it literally doesn't change anything there's no one to enforce it but he still won't go in on principle

Crowley: has submitted a tax form with simply the word "No" on it. Is not sure why it didn't work

Crewel: messed up a potion once in front of a class. Swore everyone to secrecy about it. It is the only secret that has not spread through the school

Trein: has been called by his cat's name more than once

Vargas: students are often late to things because "Coach Vargas is hunting students for sport again :( ughhhh"

Sam: will trip students he doesn't like over 'loose floorboards'

[renthony]

I know cringe is dead and nobody should be ashamed of their passions, and I would never ever ever make fun of somebody for the things they like, but I don't know if I'll ever not be at least a little embarrassed by how much I unironically, wholeheartedly, enthusiastically adore Disney's Sleeping Beauty. That movie goes on and I instantly become the world's most obnoxious Disney Adult who knows all the songs, all the trivia, and has opinions about every single frame in the film. I could write a paper on the damn thing, and maybe I will one day.

I'll go on tirades about the evils of the Walt Disney Company and the Hays Code at the drop of a hat, but damned if I am not a weak bitch for that iconic Hays-era Disney faerie tale. I contain multitudes, it's pretty to look at, and Maleficent is my favorite anything in the history of ever.

Also, Hubert and Stefan were definitely fucking. I assume we are all in agreement on this.

[imjustdelusionalok]

yandere dc: meeting camgirl! darling <3 pt. 1

have you ever wondered if...

the batboys and conner k. have met cam girl! reader?

The answer is..... yes! She has met most of them, but the same cannot be said to the other poor precious viewers of hers ;( feel very bad to the other members of the young justice and teen titans for that.

Warning for everyone: darling and my headcanons is sooooo unserious, and darling is probably a gen z-er whose referencing too much tiktok trends 😭 be warned

and anywho, these are my headcanons for their meetings <33

please repost i luv you >0!!!

　

₍ᐢ. .ᐢ₎

ᵈⁱᶜᵏ ᵍʳᵃʸˢᵒⁿ ᵃᵏᵃ, 'ⁿⁱᵍʰᵗʷⁱⁿᵍ':

one of our witty girl's most biggest and annoying dedicated fans in her stream! (He ranks 3rd in donating, and 1st in annoyance)

this man is LOADED with money, and knowing how darling can get greedy sometimes... yk what happens.

(not like he has any complain tho, as long as her attentions on him, shes allowed to take, take, take, take, and take from him <3)

How he met her fr is during on one of his late night patrols in bludhaven, he finds her on one of the empty streets in the city.

He gasps, very worried but so so excited.

'Bunny! :0' is what this man immediately thinks. Its his term of endearment for you, for looking so innocent and soft... yet so fierce and mischievious once known. (Live you is CRAZY.)

But 'Bunny', after seeing the man in blue and black latex, stood so still to the point of looking like this: 🧍‍♀️

You and him had a staring contest, so awkward and silenttt

Tho he snaps out of his train of thoughts when you finally, start to move.

Nightwing: !!!?!?!??

Darling: ....👋👋

nightwing: ...oh--

The hero of bludhaven could only pout inward, your normally so talkative and so very sharp tongued, so why wont you talk to him like you always do bunny? :( (this man forgot hes in his nightwing persona for a sec 🤦)

Turns out, our dear is very awkward when around people :( (or atleast to strangers face to face, bc she has absolutely ZERO shame when it comes to online people and her friends-- or that depends idk bc girly is unpredictable)

Anyways, before he could speak up, you ran away.

Nightwing was very worried, so he stalked followed you as you make your way back home.

Once you locked your doors and go to sleep, he takes a sigh of relief... but not before pulling out his phone and taking a picture of your address and place.

<3 what a nice little home his darling has.

(From that point on, you see this man in both his hero and civilian persona almost too often for your taste.)

Darlings pov on dick is that hes pretty f*cking annoying, and nightwing is 100 times worse

Fun fact: you often throw things at him, curse at him, or sometimes even FLASH at him whenever hes nightwing.

(he once tripped on a slime you threw and he fell straight down to a garbage can. Whoops.)

you think hes lame sauce and cringe af

you also think hes the type to say 'Golly' Unironically. (Hmm maybe u should start calling him that 😈)

Darling seeing dick/nightwing on top of the roof of another house infront of her own: go home you sicko 😾

Nightwing literally camped on top of it with the rest of the batboys visiting him + watching darling also: 🏃‍♂️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️🧍‍♀️ (minus a running jason since he CANNOT be caught watching her as he has the 2nd best relationship with her in his hero identity)

Yandere rating: 100% on money, ∞% for nuisance, 50% for humor (-100% as nightwing sadly)

ᓚ₍ ^. .^₎

ʲᵃˢᵒⁿ ᵗᵒᵈᵈ ᵃᵏᵃ 'ʳᵉᵈ ʰᵒᵒᵈ':

ofc this man is one of her favorites 😒 darling really has both the worst and at the same time, most interesting taste in men.

Hes in your top 10 on donations, but he can be very busy sometimes ;(

(Huhu but dont u worry, he makes up for it by giving u ur well deserved hundred grand before flying away to the next big battle he has <3)

In civilian, he prolly met u loitering around wayne manor's gates

(Dont ask how darling LIVES in bludhaven, yet is also in gotham 💀)

Your pretty face, so familiar, he recognizes you almost immediately even in his disheveled state in the morning.

...you were that p*rnstar. 😦 (ps: u middle fingered at him after hearing dat)

"--hey, okay, i'm sorry for saying that-" after hearing his apology, you put down your raised fists and eyed him. From head to... waistline actually his dick as you see the very scrumptious outline of it even through his baggy pants.

His eyes follows yours and-- hes flustered! Your such a perv, really, even when not in front of your screen you still do things like this?! >:( (not that hes complaining... he knows u like what u see and maybe wears these types of pants just in case u show up somewhere miraculously like today-)

"...You--" he sighs, pinching his nose. Its so early in the morning and your already at work in spreading chaos--- oh.

He stares down below him, feeling your arms hug him with a sweet smile on your face.

He gets hard a bit. God your even more beautiful face to face--

"Teehee, i always wanted to meet one of my fans :D especially you, mr. Big ;)"

...ah, he feels a lot warmer all of a sudden, the faintest red staining his cheeks. You... your such a cheeky little--

"Hey stop THAT!!--" he shouts, as you snuggle him aggressively >:)

(After that, he gives you some hefty money, and you feel very blessed afterwards and asked if hed liked a 'hawk tuah' as a reward)

...he dont know wtf is a hawk tuah. "You and your weird trends..." he groans, but watches you run around. like a playful little kitty.

If your a bunny to dick, then your a small little kitten to him. It makes more sense, you arent fit to be a bunny, your way too loud to be one--

"Hey i heard that >:(" he sees you stomp your feet.

...okay, maybe then just a little bit. Just a little...

Yandere rating: 89% on money, 5% for nuisance, 85% for humor (90% as red hood <3)

(everyone there will be a pt. 2 for tim damian conner and terry so stay tuned 😍)

(update: i think of rewriting this bc pt. 2 is so serious compared to this 😭 i think i was also high)

[pupkashi]

boyfriend!yuta headcanons

a/n: i have been having major yuta brainrot as of late ,, here u guys go ! i hope these are too badly ooc seeing as though I’ve only written for him a couple times ! they’re a bit all over the place so plz lmk what y’all think :3

wordcount: 1,183

masterlist

first things first this boy is an absolute nervous wreck anytime he’s around you before he asks you out, I’m talking stuttering and fumbling over his words, looking anywhere but you, trying his best to not embarrass himself (he inevitably does poor guy)

asks you out when it’s just the two of you, on a picnic or watching a movie, his palms are sweaty because what if he just hallucinated you saying you liked him back and this is a big mistake??

okok this boy would definitely wear those ‘i love my s/o’ shirts, starts off as a joke, then wears it unironically because yeah, he does love you, what about it??

the biggest simp in the world yall, does anything you want him to, buys you whatever you want whenever you want it, you tell him jump he’s asking how high while already jumping

it’s a serious problem, considering you now have to make it clear that just because you say something is nice doesn’t mean you want it

“this sweater is nice right yuu?” “yeah it is really nice” ,,,, “yuta why do you have two bags?” “i got you the sweater in every color you like :3”

you’re always getting packages at your door, handing them to him only for him to say ‘oh that’s actually for you!’

the worst part of this is he absolutely hates when you get him something, always telling you to spend your money on yourself or save it, saying he has everything he needs already

still accepts your gifts with open arms, over the moon because ‘you really thought of me ?? i love you :(‘ he literally is ‘🥺’ if it was a person

calls you every sweet nickname he can think of: baby, babe, sweetheart, darling, my love, honey (he tends to favor my love and darling)

you tend to call him things like: baby, lover, pretty boy, angel

he turns into an absolute blushing mess when you call him pretty boy and angel, giggling and trying to not forget what he was talking to you about in the first place

the kind of boyfriend who will buy you flowers weekly, no matter what.

ever since he overheard you on the phone talking about how much you loved his ‘just because’ flowers, he made it a reoccurring purchase at a local flower shop

gets you all your favorite snacks when he just so happens to stop by at a convenience store, handing them to you with a happy grin, ‘we can have movie night with snacks now!’

has your coffee order memorized before you guys even started dating, rarely asks if you want some, usually just surprises you with it <3

he is such a homebody boyfriend :( prefers calm and cozy nights in sipping on hot chocolate cuddles in warm blankets over going out

takes you out to nice restaurants though !! especially if you like going out, he’ll take you on all kinds of dates

goes ice skating, amusement parks, the fair, laser tag (you destroyed him), escape rooms, literally everything

at restaurants if you’re between two things to order he’ll get one of the ones you want so you get try both :3

if you don’t like what you ordered he’ll swap with you / will tell you to order something different, saying he’ll take the other plate home and eat it tomorrow so you don’t feel bad abt it <3

LOVES going grocery shopping with you </3 finds it so domestic and lovely to be able to pick you celery with you (he also gets excited when you ask him what he wants to eat so you can get the stuff for it)

he’ll always tell you he wants to bake cookies and other treats with you, grabbing all the ingredients and grinning at you sheepishly when the cart starts to get full

“we came here for four things, how did you manage to make me get all these things” “cause you love me” he giggles

giggles at everything you say !!!!! topples over laughing when you tell a joke (we get it bro you love us 😭)

it’s so easy to make him blush and flustered, literally just winking at him makes his brain short circuit (let’s not get started on when you two make out) (he whimpers 🤭)

has pictures of you as his lockscreen, always smiles a bit when he unlocks his phone, when he’s away on missions he finds himself checking the time more often than he really needs to

AMAZING TEXTER !!!!! will reply to you very quickly and address all your messages and reacts to all the things you send him (everyone is amazed because is this the same yuta who left them on deliver red for three days before replying ??)

he is SO the jealous type ,, he tries not to be, really he hates having negative emotions of any kind, but he can’t help it :(

his entire demeanor changed drastically when someone starts flirting with you, he’s standing up straighter, clenching his jaw and has that threatening look on his face, no sign of the once cheerful and bubbly boy

he’s wrapping an arm around you, tugging on your hand and trying to get you alone so he can make out with you and remind both you and himself that you’re only his <33

insanely protective of you !!! he’ll be holding your hand in public, always making sure he knows where you are, in crowded areas he has one hand on your waist to help you through the crowds <33

will obliterate anyone who even tries to threaten you, ‘look at them again and you’ll be wishing i had killed you’ but in a not creepy and actually very 🦋way yk ?

really listens to you and everything you have to say, asking questions about your interests and genuinely loves listening to you talk about the things you like <3

i know he gets u literally everything but he gives you amazing and thoughtful gifts for special occasions !! he manages to always get you perfect gifts every single time <3

he compliments you everyday without fail, no matter where he is in the world, he will ALWAYS tell you how stunning you look !!!

reminds you everyday how much he loves you, telling you and leaving you little notes, writes you love letters like he’s away at war even though he’s most likely to get back before the letter even ships

cooks you dinner when he has the chance (he’s actually a pretty good cook!!) going all the way with wine (if you drink of course) and roses

uses your shampoo and conditioner sometimes because he just loves the way they smell and they remind him so much of u hehe

has your skincare routine memorized to when you’re too exhausted to do it he can do it for you <3

he’s overall just a soft and sweet lover, doing anything and everything he can for you because he knows you’re the one for him <33

taglist (send an ask to be added!): @chilichopsticks @anime-for-the-sleepless @4sat0ruu @safaia-47 @nanamikentoseyebags

[veinvv]

i haven’t seen anyone talk about the outfit descriptions in wuwa and i honestly don’t know if they’ve always been there or if that’s new bc outfits are a thing in the game now

BUT LIKE

who wrote these ????????

rovers is so borderline passive aggressive that every time i look at it i giggle

also. did that line single-handedly make the fact that rover doesn’t ever change clothes canon within the story?

mortefi’s only has one line that’s actually about the outfit (same goes for like half the characters). but we know damn well that most of the academy researchers are NOT dressed like him and that’s all you had to say pertaining to his outfit ????

some of the funniest ones are like baizhi’s where they try and convince you the outfit is practical. like no….it’s not…

you have her fighting tacet discords in a mini bodycon dress….

shout out to yuanwu for having a description that is genuinely (mostly) just about the outfit

and then shout out to aalto and youhu’s outfit descriptions for having absolutely NOTHING to do with their clothes

“Red is Carlotta’s color.”

but…

…pink…?

her outfit is pink….

i can forgive that solely for for the laugh i had when reading that last line because i refuse to accept that they wrote that unironically

and lastly, my personal favorite. jiyan.

because what do you mean ?????

i have so many questions !!!

you’re telling me that either:

1.) jué can just materialize an outfit at will and its certified drip magic ended up outliving its omnipotence

or

2.) jué, the sentinel of jinzhou, a deity, somehow communicated with a human to commission a custom tailored outfit. (maybe that’s why it appointed jinshi as magistrate right afterward….so it could impart its dreams of making jiyan its personal dress-up barbie girl by making her talk to a tailor for it…)

but no matter what the answer is, just remember that jué specifically curated an outfit for jiyan that leaves little to the imagination in the chest area.

unless jué genuinely thought that’s what the rest of the rangers dressed like. “based on the standard uniform”—THATS NOT EVEN REMOTELY WHAT THE RANGERS ARE DRESSED LIKE??

there’s probably more good ones but i don’t have like half of the characters

this game is ridiculous i love it dearly

[crybaby-writings]

Afterglow {Howl Pendragon x Reader}

gender neutral!reader

it was quiet. unusual, but not unwelcome. the ever moving castle wobbled in its feet slightly, causing glassware and ceramics to 'dink' together softly. the silence was calming, completely the opposite of the usual loud and boisterous happenings of the magic building.

sitting in a chair next to a sleeping calcifer, the warmth of his fire seemed to seep into your bones, a feeling akin to being wrapped in your favorite sweater during the dead of winter. as you leaned back in your rickety old chair, the ceiling became the most fascinating thing in the room.

the softly tinkling sounds of things bumping around howl's room upstairs became a sort of background noise to your sudden reminiscing. "a heart is a heavy burden," he had said. having a heart was indeed a heavy burden, one that unironically seemed to pull at your chest and weigh you down.

before your thoughts could stray any further, a soft hand was atop your shoulder. there stood the wizard of this castle, hair mussed up and clothes askew. he has obviously been woken up by something, though you weren't sure what. his head hung tiredly as he swayed in his spot beside you.

"my star, are you okay? are you coming back to bed?" his voice was just above a whisper as he spoke, careful to keep quiet. a soft smile slipped onto your face as his eyebrows pinched in concern. "yes darling, im alright." you replied softly, reassuring the man beside you. "let's go back to bed, my love."

he nodded at your words, reaching out for your hand as you stood up. hand in hand, as a pair, you made your way up the stairs and into howl's room. patiently and carefully you maneuvered around the cluttered floor and moved to lay on the surrounded bed. softly leaning on one another, the soft starlight and the low creaks of the castle lulled you both to sleep.