#ultroloth

[vaguely-concerned]

honestly I don't think I'm ever getting over looking up the class description for the Fiend Warlock and finding this shit in there:

Fiends powerful enough to forge a pact include demon lords such as Demogorgon, Orcus, Fraz’Urb-luu, and Baphomet; archdevils such as Asmodeus, Dispater, Mephistopheles, and Belial; pit fiends and balors that are especially mighty; and ultroloths and other lords of the yugoloths.

wizards of the coast this is. this is silly. this is the funniest thing I've ever read and I'm not sure that's what you were going for maybe. this is the kind of shit people were shoving us into lockers over and it makes me feel like maybe they were right to

[adndmonsteraday]

Arcanaloths (pronounced: /ɑːrˈkɑːnəloʊθz/ ar-KAN-uh-lothz), or arcanadaemons (pronounced: /ɑːrˈkænɑːdeɪmʌn/ ar-CÆN-a-day-mun), were greater yugoloths known for their covetousness of information and arcane power. The sly fiends were the record keepers of the yugoloths and scribes of Gehenna, managing transactions for services rendered in the Blood War.

“An arcanaloth. Loyal to neither side in the Blood War. Always making a deal with everyone. They are as slippery as a greased basilisk and just as deadly.” — The cambion Zaxarus

Arcanaloths appeared as 6 ft (1.8 m) tall humanoids with the heads of fanged jackals or war dogs. Protruding out from the top of their skulls was a pair of ivory, whitish horns. They kept themselves well groomed and dressed in immaculate robes, but often wore disgruntled expressions. When conducting negotiations they took on the guise of other humanoids, replacing their hateful snarls with charming smiles.

Arcanaloths were a relatively civilized breed of yugoloth, possessing both keen minds and silvered tongues. They were business minded and somewhat surly, but were generally truthful and had expertise in manipulation and diplomacy. Their kind had earned a negative reputation for being adulating, avaricious and conniving in their dealings, and it was true that they viewed all around them as stepping stone to reach the rank of ultroloth.

Within the feudal hierarchy of Gehenna, arcanaloths were responsible for commanding units of lesser yugoloths while keeping track of their contracts, records, and accounts. Their schemes were not in service to their kind but meant to bolster their own power and reputations, dependent as they were on their careful judgement.

Arcanaloths were rumored to have originated within the Abyss but had been driven out by the demon lords due to their deceptive nature. It was also claimed that both the raavastas and rakshasas were the descendants of the arcanaloths, a notion supported by their mutual greed, but quickly dismissed as slander by the more honorable rakshasas.

Source: https://forgottenrealms.fandom.com/wiki/Arcanaloth

[onslaughtsixdotcom]

BEYOND ON A BUDGET

EDIT: As of May 2024, WotC have removed the ability to make ala carte purchases on D&D Beyond. So they can get fucked. Google 5e tools.

I wrote this article a while ago and left it in my drafts folder. The idea was to figure out *exactly* what a new group joining 5e and using D&D Beyond *should* buy in order to maximize their dollars.

Obviously with the new OGL stuff (which has been partially resolved, at least for 5e content) and the big exodus of D&D Beyond subscribers, the usefulness of this article has been diminished slightly. Regardless, I'm posting it again anyway in order to get it out of my queue and so that I have this as a resource to point people to, whenever someone suggests actually buying the Monster Manual or 5e Dungeon Master's Guide (IMO terrible ideas by any stretch of the imagination).

This list also is a handy tool to figure out what content is not included in the 5e SRD, since that's all the "free" content on D&D Beyond.

Without further ado:

The PHB is very nearly worth the money. The most important things you need from it are the subclasses and backgrounds; the SRD contains only 1 subclass for each class, and only 1 background. D&D Beyond actually provides 6 backgrounds from the PHB as part of the Basic Rules, so that's a little better than the SRD provides.

The backgrounds bundle is $4 and the subclasses bundle is $10. I recommend you spend that.

Other things you can purchase from the PHB are the 41 feats for $4, 2 subraces for $3, and 57 spells for $5.

Spells in the PHB but not the SRD:

Arcane Gate

Armor of Agathys

Arms of Hadar

Aura of Life

Aura of Purity

Aura of Vitality

Banishing Smite

Beast Sense

Bestow curse

Blade Ward

Blinding Smite

Chromatic Orb

Circle of Power

Cloud of Daggers

Compelled Duel

Conjure Barrage

Conjure Volley

Cordon of Arrows

Crown of Madness

Crusader's Mantle

Destructive Wave

Dissonant Whispers

Elemental Weapon

Ensnaring Strike

Feign Death

Friends

Grasping Vine

Hail of Thorns

Hex

Hunger of Hadar

Lightning Arrow

Phantasmal Force

Power Word Heal

Ray of Sickness

Searing Smite

Staggering Smite

Swift Quiver

Telepathy

Thorn Whip

Thunderous Smite

Tsunami

Witch Bolt

Wrathful Smite

The above list does not include all of the "named" spells, such as Bigby's Hand, Mordenkainen's Magnificent Mansion, etc. These spells are provided in the SRD/Basic Rules, but under generic names instead (Arcane Hand, Magnificent Mansion, etc.)

Monsters in the Monster Manual but not the SRD:

Arakocra

Banshee

Beholder

Beholder Zombie

Blights

Bullywug

Cambion

Carrion Crawler

Crawling Claw

Cyclops

Death Knight

Demilich

Barlgura

Chasme

Goristro

Manes

Shadow Demon

Yochlol

Spined Devil

Displacer Beast

Dracolich

Young Red Shadow Dragon

Empyrean

Faerie Dragon

Flameskull

Flumph

Fomorian

Gas Spore

Galeb Duhr

Dao

Marid

Gith (all)

Grell

Helmed Horror

Hook Horror

Intellect Devourer

Jackalwere

Kenku

Kuo-Toa

Mud Mephit

Smoke Mephit

Mind Flayer

Drones

Myconids

Quaggoth Spore Servant

Nagas

Nothic

Half-Ogre

Peryton

Piercer

Pixie

Quaggoth

Remorhaz

Revenant

Fire Snake

Scarecrow

Slaad Tadpole

Red Slaad

Blue Slaad

Green Slaad

Gray Slaad

Death Slaad

Thri-kreen

Troglodyte

Umber Hulk

Water Weird

Yeti

Yuan-ti

Arcanaloth

Mezzoloth

Nycaloth

Ultroloth

Magic Items in the DMG but not SRD (30 items):

Alchemy Jug

Cap of Water Breathing

Mariner's Armor

Cloak of Invisibility [functionally identical to Ring of Invisibility]

Driftglobe

Efreeti Chain

Elixer of Health

Gloves of Thievery

Instrument of the Bards [multiple]

Potion of Fire Breath

Potions of Greater Healing, Superior Healing, Supreme Healing

Potion of Invulnerability

Potion of Longevity

Potion of Vitality

Rod of Ressurection

Rod of the Pact Keeper

Saddle of the Cavalier

Scroll of Protection

Sending Stones

Sentinel Shield

Staff of the Adder

Sword of Answering

Sword of Vengeance

Tentacle Rod

Tome of the Stilled Tongue

Weapon of Warning

Blog of Holding made a breakdown of all 30 of these items and even made a few homebrew alternatives for you:

https://blogofholding.com/?p=7803

[jonjmurakami]

#pungeonsanddragons •Bad puns of Dungeons & Dragons monsters: 071123 •Ultroloth •The enigmatic rulers of the Yugoloths (demon fiends). They were corrupt schemers, manipulators, plotters, & mysterious masterminds obsessed with power and wealth, never considering themselves “evil” but above the extremes of law & chaos.

•As a kid, I was always envious of those classmates who had the box of Crayola l crayons with 64 colors- and the built-in sharpener. So when I got the full set of COPIC markers, I thought I’d use them all! In reality, I use the same 24 colors - lol

- Keep smiling and stay safe, everyone! 🙂

#jonjmurakami #dandd #copic @copic_official_us #copicmarkers #comic #comicstrip #cartoon #dungeonsanddragons #dungeonsanddragonsmonsters #dungeonsanddragonscreatures #dungeonsanddragonsfanart #pun #puns #ultroloth #colorful

[thecreaturecodex]

Daemon, Ultrodaemon

Image by Conceptopolis, © Wizards of the Coast.

[Commissioned by @justicegundam82​, who is of a similar mind to me: the ultroloth/ultrodaemon has gotten a raw deal for the last 20 years. In the original Monster Manual 2, the ultrodaemon actually had more hit dice than a pit fiend or balor, and in 2e they were on an even footing with those two paragons of evil (thanks, Planescape!). But in 3.0 they were CR 16, 3.5 they were CR 13, and they’re CR 13 in the current edition. If you want a CR 13 ultrodaemon for Pathfinder, @thecreaturechronicle​ did one here.

Also, the olethrodaemon is a little disappointing for the capstone daemon. Maybe because they’re adorable]

Daemon, Ultrodaemon CR 20 NE Outsider This regal-looking creature has no face, merely a blank green-grey void with eyes that shine like opals. It carries a finely made sword in one hand.

An ultrodaemon is an extinction event made manifest, the representation of the death of an entire species. They are the generals of Abaddon’s armies and the masterminds of its triumphs. An ultrodaemon is mercenary to the extreme, working with other ultrodaemons, daemonic harbingers or Horsemen of the Apocalypse as their own needs see fit. They are especially fond of obcisidaemons—after the daemons of genocide have wiped out a culture or civilization, the ultrodaemons savor mopping up pockets of survivors to lead the species to oblivion.

Ultrodaemons are unusual among daemons in that they prefer subtlety to mass murder. They are capable of walking the earth in mortal guise, and between their natural skills at persuasion and their telepathic commands, are able to shape the efforts of kingdoms and nations towards destructive and deadly ends. Only when their plans come to fruition do they enter the battlefield directly, although they are happy to test their skills and those of their minions.

An ultrodaemon rarely if ever fights alone, and if caught off guard is capable of summoning aid to its side. They often bolster their forces with magical enhancements, flying over the battlefield and surveying weak points that require their attention. Their opalescent eyes flash in ways to render foes completely helpless, but ultrodaemons much prefer to leave these enemies with self-destructive or murderous suggestions rather than merely finish them off. Thanks to their selective spell immunity and ability to conjure symbols with a mere gesture, ultrodaemons are versatile combatants, and no two fights with them are likely to go the same way. If badly pressed, an ultrodaemon will flee to fight another day, plotting revenge against those that best them.

An ultrodaemon stands over six feet tall in its natural form, and weighs about two hundred pounds. They do tend to indulge their vanity with fine clothes and jewelry, and often wear trophies from especially memorable fights—necklaces of preserved fingers are a favorite.

Ultrodaemon     CR 20 XP 307,200 NE Medium outsider (daemon, evil, extraplanar, shapechanger) Init +9; Senses arcane sight, darkvision 60 ft., Perception +32, true seeing Defense AC 38, touch 28, flat-footed 29 (+9 Dex, +9 profane, +10 natural)hp 341 (22d10+220); fast healing 10 Fort +17, Ref +22, Will +20 DR 15/good and silver; Immune acid, death effects, disease, poison; Resist cold 10, electricity 10, fire 10; SR 31 Defensive Abilities profane shield, selective spell immunity Offense Speed 30 ft., fly 60 ft. (good) Melee +4 unholy longsword +35/+30/+25/+20 (1d8+13/17-20 plus 2d6 unholy), slam +26 (1d12+4) or 2 slams +31 (1d12+9) Ranged oblivion ray +31 touch (20d8 typeless plus energy drain) Special Attacks energy drain (1d4 negative levels, DC 30), mesmerizing gaze, symbol master, telepathic urge Spell-like Abilities CL 22nd, concentration +31 Constant—arcane sight, fly, true seeing At will—blasphemy (DC 26), greater dispel magic, greater teleport (self plus 50 lbs. objects only), invisibility, prying eyes, unholy blight (DC 23) 3/day— quickened contagious flame, empowered fire storm (DC 27), mass bear’s endurance, mass bull’s strength, mass cat’s grace, mass suggestion (DC 25), prismatic spray (DC 26) 1/day—greater scrying (DC 26), implosion (DC 28), plane shift (DC 26), prismatic wall (DC 27), summon (1 daemon of CR 19 or lower, 9th level, 100%), unholy aura (DC 27) Statistics Str 28, Dex 28, Con 30, Int 27, Wis 25, Cha 29 Base Atk +22; CMB +31 (+35 disarm); CMD 50 Feats Combat Expertise, Empower SLA (fire storm), Greater Disarm, Improved Critical (longsword), Improved Disarm, Persuasive, Point-Blank Shot, Power Attack, Precise Shot,  Quicken SLA (contagious flame),Vital Strike Skills Bluff +34, Diplomacy +38, Disguise +34 (+44 when using change shape), Fly +46, Intimidate +38, Knowledge (arcana) +30,  Knowledge (history) +30, Knowledge (nature) +30, Knowledge (planes) +33, Knowledge (religion) +30, Perception +32, Sense Motive +32, Spellcraft +30, Stealth +34, Use Magic Device +34 Languages Abyssal, Celestial, Common, Draconic, Infernal, telepathy 100 ft. SQ change shape (humanoid, alter self), perfect copy Ecology Environment any land or underground (Abaddon) Organization solitary, council (2-6), or army (1 plus 20-200 HD of daemons) Treasure double standard (+4 unholy longsword, other treasure) Special Abilities Mesmerizing Gaze (Su) Paralyzed 1d4 rounds, 30 ft., Will DC 30 negates. Daemons are immune to this effect. The save DC is Charisma based. Oblivion Ray (Su) As a standard action, an ultrodaemon can fire a ray at a range of 240 feet with no range increment. A creature struck by this ray takes 20d8 points of typeless damage and suffers 1d4 negative levels. A successful DC 31 Fortitude save halves the damage and negates the negative levels. A creature reduced to 0 hit points by this ability is utterly destroyed, as if killed with a destruction spell. The save DC is Constitution based. Perfect Copy (Ex) An ultrodaemon can assume the form of specific creatures when using its change shape ability. Profane Shield (Su) An ultrodaemon gains a profane bonus to its Armor Class equal to its Charisma modifier. Selective Spell Immunity (Su) Once per day, an ultroloth can spend 10 minutes in meditation to grant itself immunity to nine spells, one of each spell level. These spells must be subject to spell resistance, and this effect otherwise acts as unimpeachable spell resistance against those spells specifically. The following is a list of sample spells that may be taken by an ultroloth as its immunities—magic missile, spiritual weapon, vampiric touch, holy smite, waves of fatigue, banishment, holy word, fire storm, dominate monster Symbol Master (Su) Once per day as a standard action, an ultrodaemon can trace a glyph in the air to have the effect of any symbol spell it chooses. This symbol has a save DC of 30 and is treated as being CL 22nd for the purposes of dispelling or other effects. The save DC is Charisma based. Telepathic Urge (Su) An ultrodaemon can implant a suggestion, as per the spell, in the mind of a creature paralyzed by its gaze as a swift action. A creature can resist this suggestion with a DC 30 Will save. The save DC is Charisma based.

[desertdruidcrafts]

Yugoloths for D&D minis

[ronamis]

For the reason of summer I’m hella busy being in places and doing stuff. I’m still alive. My tumblr is still alive. Thanks for still being here, tho

[inkspottie]

I wonder, even if d&d!lolbit became an ultroloth, would he keep those foxish traits?

Ehh they probably wouldn’t. Like how I imagine Lolbit is, is they’re a small Fae/magical being that William trapped in a box to try and use their magic, but found Lolbit useless cuz LolBit’s magic is trickery based. And trickery sometimes doesn’t get what you want (like wild mage shit)

So they probably wouldn’t become a ultroloth, but they just look just like a Arcanaloth when trying to be like “humanoid” or in disguise. Usually they just settle for a fox or kitty so they can pretend to be Mike’s familiar

[drmapzo]

Hello, everyone!

This week I've made a dining room! The room is quite large, and it's able to accommodate a large number of people. Good for having royal banquets!

You'll also find a large fireplace near the top, the host can order to burn some unruly players there if they get on their nerves. Ouch.

The creature tokens for this week are a King, an Ultroloth and a Yuan-ti Pure Blood. Emerald gets the King while Diamond gets all three.

You can see a preview of all of this week’s Patreon content here.

Thank you very much for taking a look and be sure to check out my Patreon where you can pledge for gridless version, alternate map versions as well as the tokens pertaining to this map.

[caimansoldaccount]

Hi I made an MSM D&D fusion table

(also the D&D Monster list was stolen borrowed from JessJackdaw on YouTube, go check them out they're very cool.)

MSM Monsters

1. Furcorn

2. Repatillo

3. Yool

4. Dandidoo

5. Zynth

6. Pladdie

7. Yawstrich

8. Arackulele

9. Deedge

10. Woolabee

11. Ghazt

12. Noggin

13. Hoola

14. Brump

15. Potbelly

16. Tawkerr

17. Bellowfish

18. Theremind

19. Stogg

20. Grumpyre

21. Shrubb

22. Plixie

23. Uuduk

24. Maw

25. Humbug

26. Punkleton

27. Wubbox

28. Bonkers

29. Fwog

30. Sneyser

31. G’Joob

32. Oaktapus

33. Glowl

34. Dermit

35. Gob

36. Scups

37. Blabbit

38. Parlsona

39. Peckidna

40. Fung Pray

41. Phangler

42. Riff

43. Attmoz

44. Floot Fly

45. Reebro

46. Floogull

47. Bona Petite

48. Bowgart

49. Nebulob

50. Kayna

51. Tweedle

52. Thrumble

53. Tapricorn

54. Krillby

55. Glaishur

56. Entbrat

57. Maggpi

58. Dragong

59. Toe Jammer

60. Poewk

61. Bisonorous

62. Congle

63. Jeeode

64. Vhamp

65. Fiddlement

66. Cybop

67. Yelmut

68. Screemu

69. Stoowarb

70. Quarrister

71. Drumwhol

72. Kazillion

73. Pango

74. Wynq

75. Hornacle

76. Whisp

77. Quibble

78. Tympa

79. Plinkajou

80. Mammott

81. Sox

82. Rootitoot

83. Loodvig

84. T Rox

85. Cantorelle

86. Pixolotl

87. Spunge

88. Ziggurab

89. Periscorp

90. PomPom

91. Jellbilly

92. Drumpler

93. Blasoom

94. Blipsqueak

95. Sooza

96. Denchus

97. Drummidary

98. Furnoss

99. Caimuse (Or Gloptic if you wanna use an official monster)

100. Galvana

D&D Monsters

1. Owlbear

2. Myconid

3. Faerie Dragon

4. Shadow

5. Beholder

6. Gibbering Mouther

7. Kobold

8. Star Spawn

9. Wyvern

10. Tarasque

11. Aboleth

12. Chromatic Dragon

13. Kuo-Toa

14. Mimic

15. Dryad

16. Flesh Golem

17. Rakshasa

18. Aboleth

19. Oblex

20. Ki Rin

21. Bullywug

22. Flail Snail

23. Kenku

24. Grell

25. Black Pudding

26. Mind Flayer

27. Stirge

28. Duregar

29. Hydra

30. Manticore

31. Cockitrace

32. Bullette

33. Chimera

34. Quasit

35. Empyrean

36. Displacer Beast

37. Lich

38. Flumpf

39. Death Tyrant

40. Ultroloth

41. Scarecrow

42. Metallic Dragon

43. Gnoll

44. Nothic

45. Deep Scion

46. Hill Giant

47. Cadaver Collector

48. Ettercap

49. Neothelid

50. Intellect Devourer

51. Remorhaz

52. Otyugh

53. Troglodyte

54. Kraken

55. Dragon Turtle

56. Shambling Mound

57. Quaggoth

58. Grick

59. Froghemoth

60. Merrenoloth

61. Arcanaloth

62. Umber Hulk

63. Hook Horror

64. Slaad

65. Axe Beak

66. Atropal

67. Animated Armor

68. Harpy

69. Couatl

70. Bugbear

71. Peryton

72. Banderhobb (prev. Bandersnatch)

73. Gelatinous Cube

74. Ochre Jelly

75. Storm Giant

76. Chain Devil

77. Behir

78. Drider

79. Cranium Rat

80. Specter

81. Yuan-Ti

82. Demogorgon

83. Neogi

84. Kruthik

85. Abyssal Chicken

86. Goblin

87. Rust Monster

88. Ettin

89. Water Weird

90. Revenant

91. Spectator

92. Succubus/Incubus

93. Boneclaw

94. Darkmantle

95. Modron

96. Purple Worm

97. Roper

98. Troll

99. Xorn

100. Astral Dreadnought

[riverbear13]

Ok I have a critical role theory

In the Explorers Guide to Wildemount Matt presentes the ideia of vestiges of the Betrayer Gods which are evil and currupting weapons that come from one of the Betrayers.

We all know that Vokodo is probably a Morkoth because of his appearance and the described regional effects from Volo's guide of monsters, but Matt said that Caleb and Beau couldn't identify "what it is or what it was"

My theory is that this particular Morkoth is deeply currupted by Grovelthrash Torog's vestige.

Those evil vestiges are sentient very similar to Craven Edge.

"The weapon communicates telepathically with its wielder and can speak, read, and understand Abyssal, Common, and Infernal. Personality A covetous ultroloth named Ciria lives within Grove/thrash. The weapon values material possessions and doling out pain. It compliments its wielder whenever they claim treasure and takes pleasure in harming others."

Imagine with me you are a simple Morkoth that hoards and steals and have prisoners in your dreamlike Island until one day he founds this amazing powerful hammer that agrees with him slowly you became corrupted and even more powerful.

Now from a narrative perspective 7 powerful pcs like the mighty nien can kill a Morkoth with not that much effort. 130 hp and no legendary actions the big difficulty is the spell casting and lair actions, but that can be overcome specially with an archdruid and possibly an achfey. So Matt must have power up this mother******

Plus going way more meta TEGTW treats the destruction of this artifacts as a important part and challenge in a campaign in this continent maybe that's where the MN has to go now that they solve the war thing.

Am I overthinking things? I would love to discuss this

[yourplayersaidwhat]

My DM to me after polymorphing an Ultroloth: You are now holding a lawful-evil snail.

[daemons-and-deathrays]

Monsters of Reality - Yes, Even More Planar Creatures!

Monsters of Reality – Yes, Even More Planar Creatures!

“Give ya the dark for some good jink! I know tons, lots of things about distant sights and travels. Don’t let the grungy look dissuade you, I know all about the realms beyond the cage!” – Lanky, Ultroloth-blooded Tiefling Rogue/Planar Fighter, The Hive of Sigil

I’m back at it once more, bringing in some more classic monsters of the Planescape Campaign Setting. While Wizards might eventually port…

[darius-stormcrow]

Back to the Blood War.

We've had a bit of downtime since the collapse of Citadel Cavitius.  I went around Sigil, looking for any sign of Shar or anyone else who survived Citadel Cavitius but either nobody else has turned up or nobody in Sigil's willing to talk about it. Probably doesn't help that this place is utterly massive and full of people who all seem to talk some weird back-alley perversion of common.  Seriously, if I get called a 'barmy berk' one more time, we're gonna find out what happens to someone if they open every door in 'the city of doors' with their face.  But I digress; with my attempt to sort out any personal matters foiled, it was time to turn to other matters. I half-expected everyone to part ways after our multiplanar misadventure, but it looks like we're sticking together for now.  We probably have our collective benefactor to thank for that- Spiral's got another job for us.  He's been shipping goods between planes, and some of those shipments have gone missing; since we survived a fight between demigods, we're on the short list of people he can trust to get this dealt with.

The objective this time is to head to some dump out in the abyss called 'Hopeless'.  Never actually been there, but with a name like that, there's a ninety-nine percent chance it's a dump. I'm not sure what kind of effects constantly going to the abyss is having on the others, I've been pretty okay so far but then I'm also a paragon of immaculate mental focus.  All that time I spent gambling, drinking, and engaging in other vices was just training. Okay?  You wouldn't get it because you're not used to how spiritual and mental training works.  At any rate, I think most of us are going to be fine- the majority of my companions haven't been too adversely affected by what we've gone through.  My main areas of concern are with Jack and Calami.  Though the latter has calmed down significantly since we've arrived somewhere that isn't just entirely undead.  Regardless of what happens with them, I'm sure I'll be fine.

Well, Hopeless was as much a dump as I expected it to be.  As soon as we got through the portal to the city, we wound up in a washed-out colorless wasteland.  Also we were advised to cover up any vivid colors on our own persons, as apparently the denizens of this plane seem to consider anything that isn't solely on the grayscale to be a sensory assault.  We headed down to meet with a Tiefling by the name of Milay, and she arranged for us to travel with a shipment of goods through the area wherein Spiral's shipments had disappeared.  This is where things take a turn.

We get out there with the goods, and almost as soon as we're out of view of the city, we're set upon by a pack of mercenaries.  After everything we've been through, a bunch of mercnaries aren't going to amount to much of a challenge, and they didn't.  The other hired swords whom Milay had sent along with us had their hands full, but we sorted things out rather deftly- deftly enough to earn a round of applause.  Which was what we got once the fighting was over.

Clap, clap, clap.  Right from inside the tree line. Then who comes walking out of there but Shar himself.  I don't know if he knew we were coming, or if he was just trying to intercept the shipment, but he was right there in front of me.  And what's more, he called me out specifically.  It was time to fight, man to man.

Shar was strong, he had every bit of training I'd ever had, only with more experience to top it off.  I'd like to tell you that I dug deep and overcame him by sheer force of will- but I didn't beat him.  It wasn't like the last time we'd fought, where it took everything I could muster to simply stay alive; this fight was close, but ultimately experience made the difference.  Then, surprisingly, he spared me.  Even gave me a potion to heal myself up with.  Said next time we fought, he wanted me to be at my best.  I don't get it, but I asked him why he was serving Iuz.  He just said “Iuz was a means to an end.” And left it at that.  Before Shar left, Noxus made a move to finish him off; but I had to stop him.  Noxus has already demonstrated his ability to settle issues with sharp objects, and while I'm sure it'd save me trouble down the line if he did so; I have to settle things with Shar personally.

As a parting gift, Shar directed us down a side path, mentioned we'd “Find something interesting” there.  After we got ourselves sorted and cleaned up the aftermath of the fight. (Mercenaries that attacked us wound up being gross bug demons, by the way), we headed down the path Shar had mentioned.  It was partially hidden, but there were signs of recent use- and before long we found ourselves at the mouth of a big cave.  What was inside the cave, you might ask?  The cargo that Spiral had stolen from him and an Ultroloth.  To my understanding, Ultroloths are supposed to be neutral in the Blood War, not taking a side with either the Baatezu or the Tenar'ri; but this Ultroloth didn't like Spiral supplying cursed weapons to the Tenar'ri.  He told us to go tell Spiral, as a warning.  I'm not exactly a fan of taking orders from Demons- but I was exhausted from fighting Shar, and the others didn't feel like trying their luck.  So we're going to head back and let the boss know what's going on.

I don't know how to feel about getting dragged deeper into meddling with the Blood War, and I'm not entirely sure I trust Spiral yet.  But since we're already on this this track, we may as well ride it to the end.

[sageadvicednd]

D&D Monster of the Day: Ultroloth

http://www.sageadvice.eu/2017/04/08/dd-monster-of-the-day-ultroloth/

[thosewhobringham]

9. What is the funniest thing anyone has ever said in a d&d session you’ve played in?

Man, there have been so many funny things that I honestly can’t remember most of them. There was a super funny one that I’ll never forget, though.

Context: The party has just fought and defeated an Ultroloth in the basement of a monastery.

Rogue: I’d like to search for loot.

Me: Make an Investigation check.

Rogue: *rolls poorly*

Me: You find a bit ol’ pile of Ultroloth poop.

Also me: *Wrongly thinks that one-liner is the end of that train of thought*

Rogue: I’m going to harvest the poop for potions or something.

Me: You’re going to use poop in a potion? Would you drink a potion knowing that there’s poop in it?

Rogue: Hey, man. You gotta do what you gotta do. 

Me: Poop potions, though?

Me again: ...Pootions?

For the 20 Dungeons and Dragons questions