#ugh it makes my blood boil every time i think of it

[latentorogeny]

unlocking a new emotion I like to call “Dave Rage” in which I get so angry about the way Dave Filoni wrote/ writes Thrawn that i physically cannot stop talking abt it

[bg-brainrot]

The Thousandth Time (Astarion x GN!Tav)

Featuring: Astarion x Rogue!Tav

Series: Fits into Love at First Knife, AO3 link here

Rating: Explicit, 18+

Summary: Astarion and Rogue!Tav make love for the thousandth time. In a bathtub.

Tags: Smut, Slice of life, POV Second Person, Gender-Neutral Pronouns, Fluff, Spawn Astarion, Post-Canon, bathtub sex, sloppy sex, seriously just sickeningly sweet smut, Spawn Astarion, Post-Canon, Established Relationship, Domesticity is romantic, Hand Jobs, Blood Drinking

A/N: Some context-- I wanted to write soft, gender neutral smut. And by the gods is this soft. I tried to look at what it's like to love someone for so long. In my experience, when you've been with someone for so many years, you still find a lot of love in the little things. which I hope I hit? Anyway, enjoy!!

Word count: ~5.3k

The thousandth time you make love to Astarion, you don't know it's the thousandth time.

It's a day like any other, really.

After a long day at the guild, you've arrived home, a sigh on your lips, a furrow to your brow.

"Whatever is the matter, my dear?"

You compose your expression and turn toward your lover. "Astarion," you start, a reflexive wistfulness to your tone. Gods are you glad to see him after a day like today. "Nothing is the matter. Nothing important anyway. Simply glad to be home."

Astarion gives you a look that says he doesn't quite believe you, but knows better than to pry too deeply into issues you'd rather not bring home. "Very well, darling. But you know I'm all pointy ears. Especially if Nine-Fingers has been difficult again."

"Ugh," you say, wincing in annoyance. "Do not say her name right now."

The vampire gives you a bright, toothy laugh. "That bad, eh?" You nod. He walks toward you, arms outstretched. "Mmm in that case, shall we call it an early night tonight?"

You dive into the comfort of his arms, holding him to you, inhaling his fresh, familiar scent. It feels like the day's troubles melt in his cold embrace, and the tension in your body finally relaxes. "That might be nice."

"Dinner first?" he asks, pulling away from you slightly.

You look into his warm crimson eyes, feel that same warmth reflected in your face. Of course, he’d check to see if your mortal needs have been met. "No need, I've eaten. How about you?"

Astarion brings a hand up to inspect your face, this way, then that. It’s as if he’s examining you for injury, not assessing if he can partake in a bit of your blood. "Mmm, you seem a tad tired, love."

"You know I'll manage. Besides, get my blood while it's still boiling with rage," you say, craning your neck for him in response.

"As delectable as that sounds,” he begins, letting go of your face, tracing his fingers along your neck. “I think a bath and bed ought to come first."

You want to argue the point, make sure he's fed to the best of your ability, but the yawn that escapes you is irrefutable. With nary another word, his hand is on the small of your back, guiding you toward the bath.

"Would you like to join me?" you ask him as you open the door. Your expression is calm, the question harboring no hidden intentions. Any other day, you may have raised an eyebrow at him suggestively, begun taking off your armor in a tease– but you're tired, simply not wanting to relinquish the feel of his arms around you.

"Certainly, if it keeps you from falling asleep in the tub…" he trails off, looking at you warily. He appears torn, somewhere between keeping you from drowning and keeping you from resting.

You give him a wry smile. “Imagine that. After felling all manner of beasts and men, finally succumbing to the tub.”

Astarion offers you a reluctant smile in return. “My love, I swear to every god above and below, if you die in any manner even remotely that ludicrous, I shall have to pretend not to know you at your funeral.”

“That’s fair,” you say, holding a hand out to him. “Best to make sure that doesn’t happen then, don’t you think?”

The man can’t argue with that, nor does he seem to want to. After an entire day away from each other, this closeness is exactly what the two of you crave. So he takes your offered hand, and follows you into the bathroom.

It has been years since you had added a tub big enough for the two of you in your house. While the two of you had accrued wealth enough for an entire bathhouse, you’d settled for a more modest setup. At least, modest in Astarion’s eyes.

The floor is made of the finest marble tiles, the walls of intricately laid and patterned brick. And in the center of the room, is the room’s main attraction: the enormous, magical tub. It’s long enough that you could comfortably lay down across the entire bottom, wide enough that you have to extend your arms to reach both sides. The outer edges are infused with enchantments to improve your bathing experience, and the tub itself is made of the highest quality crystal that gold can buy.

Once you enter the room, you activate the heat and water sigils along the basin’s edges and turn back to Astarion. “Would you mind grabbing some soaps from the shelf?”

He gives you a lopsided grin, eyes crinkling with amusement, but still moves to do as you ask. “Would you also like me to bathe you while I’m at it?”

“Oh, would you?” you ask half-joking. You begin to strip your armor off, piece by piece.

“Mmm,” he murmurs, picking out a few of his preferred scents from a shelf on the wall. He’s accumulated quite the collection now, enjoying mixing and matching as his nose guides him. “That could be arranged.”

You’re almost halfway through your armor when he returns, bottles of lemon, bergamot, and sage soaps in hand. “Ah, you know how much I love bergamot,” you say, smiling at it fondly, pausing halfway through undoing your leather straps.

“I know,” he says, placing them next to the tub before turning his attention fully to you. “I also know that you need help with that armor or we may be here all night.”

Holding your arms out wordlessly, Astarion starts to unbuckle each and every strap from the front of your padded armor. As he releases you from its confines, you take a deep, relieved breath and say, “Thank you, love.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he murmurs, leaving a long lingering touch along your now exposed collarbone. “While you strike quite the image in your armor, I think I much prefer you without.”

You laugh, feeling quite light in the now steaming room. “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say your mind is straying quite far from rest, Astarion.”

The vampire shrugs, beginning to tug at your undershirt and small clothes with each of his hands. “Merely stating fact, my darling.”

With a few smooth movements, he’s taken off the last of your clothing, exposing every inch of you to the warmth of the room and the heat of his gaze. He seems just about ready to bury his head in your neck, begin covering every piece of you in kisses, when you speak, “Excuse me, are you planning to enter the bath in your house clothes?”

Astarion looks down at his own garb, the comfortable satins and silks of a man who spent the day lounging at home. When faced with your words and, ugh, logic, he says with a sigh, “Would you do the honors?”

You need no more invitation before your hands are on his soft, flowing shirt, running along it appreciatively. “Is this new?”

“It is,” he says, a hint of pride in his voice. “Do you like it?”

“It feels magnificent,” you respond, beginning to undo its buttons. “I may just have to steal it for myself one of these days.”

His lips purse at you. “You know, you could simply ask, darling.”

“Where’s the fun in that?” you taunt, pulling up on the shirt's edges, tugging it up and off of him. Now, faced with the plane of his ivory chest, your fingers act on instinct. They trail down his shoulders, trace the line of his pectorals, drop down the center of his stomach to the waist of his pants.

Astarion gives you a low, approving noise before asking you wryly, “Now whose mind is straying?”

“Not mine,” you respond, pulling his pants and underwear down in one smooth motion. “My hands are just so tired, I’m sure you understand.”

“Surely,” he responds, as he pulls each foot out of his pant legs. “How is the water?”

The bath is steaming by now, visibly fogging up the room, but still, you bend down to skim your hands along its surface. “Ah, it’s warm,” you say, gripping the edge with one hand. “Maybe too warm?”

“No such thing,” he responds, and one of his hands lands next to yours as he bends down to feel the water for himself. The man gives a happy hum before asking, “Shall we then?” Then his now-wet hand is smacking your butt, his head gesturing toward the waiting water. 

“Excuse you,” you say, indignantly, as you turn toward him. “I'm tired.” But you don't feel tired. Not after running your hands over his cold skin. Not after feeling the quick contact of his hand on your backside.

“Not to worry, darling. I’ll take care of you.”

As in, bathing or–? Luckily you don't have much more time to think about it before he’s lowering himself into the tub. Even with his quick movement, even with the water’s slight obscurity, you easily note that Astarion’s cock has stirred in interest.

Ah. While you hadn’t meant to illicit anything by inviting him… it’s certainly not unwelcome. It’s a good thing that your exhaustion is all but melting away under his loving touches.

Acutely aware of his sharp gaze on the length of your back, you turn to face away from him, grab the edge of the tub, and slowly enter its warmth. As was customary in your baths, he would start with your back, so you take a spot in front of him, leaving just enough room for him to settle behind you as he pleases.

Too much room clearly, as Astarion immediately scoots forward, extending his legs to each side of you. You feel his hardening length graze your backside as he does so and can’t help the smile that curves your lips.

"Astarion, dear,” you start, placing your hands on each of his knees under the water. “Are you certain you want to bathe me?"

“And why wouldn't I be?” He leans closer, planting a soft kiss along your spine.

You debate backing up into his groin to prove a point but instead shake your head. "No reason, I suppose."

He begins by lathering his hands in a mixture of soaps, carefully measured out by eye and feel. All the while, you sit before him, hands on each of his calves, thumbs repeatedly rubbing the ridge of his muscles. While he’d had a nice, calm day today, his calves are always so tight from sneaking about– and it’s the least you can do for the man that’s bathing you.

Then his hands get to work.

At first he drags both hands along your back, once, twice. Once he’s made sure that soap covers every inch of you, he starts massaging you, working the soap into your skin, kneading into your sore muscles.

Astarion knows your body so intimately and, after so many years of tending to each other, he rubs all of your tightest spots. His knuckles press deep into your neck. His fingers work around your upper back. His thumbs dig underneath the edges of your shoulder blades, working out the knots he knows lay beneath. And, by the gods, if you thought you’d been melting under his caresses before, now you’re practically a puddle.

You can’t help the noises that come out at the sensation of his nimble fingers at work. Your shoulders ache from a long day of sneaking, stabbing, and general tension of dealing with people– the relief is palpable in the way you relax into his touch, grip his legs, and release several breathy moans.

And with each moan, you can feel his cock growing firmer against you. After the first few, you can feel him shift closer with every noise he draws from you. Knowing your affect on him has always done something to stir the fire in you, and this time it has you shifting uncomfortably as heat blooms between your legs. The both of you spur the other’s building lust, all the while the fresh scent that Astarion’s concocted permeates the air.

Then, when it’s clear he’s done with your back, thoroughly satisfied with each gasping breath of pleasure, his hands drop from your shoulders. They tail down your back, playing along your spine. And, in an almost leisurely motion, they wrap around your torso, where they finally settle on your chest.

I don’t think this is a relaxing bath anymore, you think distantly. Yet you’re unable to resist leaning into his palms, arching into his touch.

Sensing your shuffles, Astarion curls further into your back, almost entirely flush to you now. His fingers feel their way to each of your nipples, first gently brushing against them, then thumbing over them each in turn. They respond eagerly, perking up under his delicate sweep.

“Astarion,” you begin, turning your head back to him slightly and raising an eyebrow. “What are you doing?” Your tone isn’t exactly admonishing– your voice comes out too quiet, desire muffling all other emotions.

His hands trail down your chest, past the surface of the bath water, settling on each of your thighs before he responds, voice low, lips inches away from your ear. “Making sure that every single centimeter of my beautiful darling is clean, of course.”

“Astarion, I thought you would be, ahh… taking care of me," you say, barely holding on to your trail of thought as his hands dip between your legs, brushing your sensitive core.

“I am taking care of you,” he whispers, finally closing the remaining distance between your back, his front. At the feel of his stiff cock pressing against your back, you give an involuntary gasp. He seems to enjoy your reaction, taking a moment to slowly grind the entire length of his hardened arousal along your backside once, before he settles between your cheeks. “Unless you’d rather leave all of this stress pent up, my dear?”

You’d been tired– been ready to bathe and head off to bed. But something about this man never fails to ignite the fire in your heart– or your loins. “I suppose not,” you murmur, releasing Astarion’s calf, running up his leg with your fingers, landing on his arm, gripping it closer to you.

“I knew you would see reason,” he says, taking your grip as guidance. His hand moves down to begin stroking your heat, building up steadily to the fast-paced rhythm he knows you like. In the water’s buoyant embrace, his actions feel a touch more fluid, his fingers more silken.

It has taken time experimenting together to reach this place– one of utmost security and intimate knowledge of each others’ bodies. But now that you’re here, you’ve found that Astarion’s agile fingers are obscenely precise in their movements. Like he knows exactly which pins to tumble to unlock your utmost excitement.

So you can't help the way you buck into his touch, nor the way the water sloshes around you both in response.

"Careful, love," he says, hand stilling. "We don't want to make a mess this time, do we?"

Somewhere in the back of your mind, you remember the last time this had happened, how the floor had been practically flooded. You should agree with him, make sure that such an incident doesn't occur again. But the front of your mind is wholly occupied, thinking only of how he's stopped moving his hand, how being careful may mean that he takes it too gently. "Mmm, we managed to clean it up well enough," you respond, jerking your hips back, pressing against him with need.

Astarion's laughter rings upon the bathroom's stone walls, before it turns into a groan as you roll your hips once more. His voice is a bit huskier when he responds, "You know we’re going to regret it later.”

You smile back at him, satisfied with the noise you’ve elicited. “Sounds like a problem for later, doesn’t it?” Then your hand squeezes his arm, motioning it back down to your now throbbing arousal. “For now, what was that about releasing my stress?”

“Oh very well… in that case, let’s find where you ache most, shall we?” Astarion murmurs, dipping his head, placing a kiss on the base of your neck. “Here?” Your shoulder. “Or perhaps here?” Then his hand settles back between your legs, fingers touching you in a rather delicate caress. “Or maybe here?”

You hum a noise of approval as his . “Oh, there.”

His fingers close on your swollen sex, rubbing languidly as he whispers in your ear, “Mmm, darling. So much tension…” A bit more pressure. “I must simply…” A bit faster pace. “Massage it all away…”

If anything, his touches cause you to grasp at his legs harder, all of the muscles in your body responding in kind to his ministrations. Your back arches instinctively, earning an exquisite groan from Astarion. So when his next stroke causes you to clench, you lean into it, grinding your ass back into the full length of his erection, sliding easily in the water’s low friction.

His other hand finds its way to your hip, helping you match his pace as you continue to rock into him.

The two of you fall into a beautiful, raucous rhythm, each open and generous with your vocal pleasure, the water’s regular splashes punctuating each movement.

“Yes, yes, gods, Astarion.”

“My sweet, you’re the only divine thing here.”

Then your words begin to lose sense, your rhythm begins to falter, and it’s clear that you won’t last much longer under his caring fingers.

You also know that Astarion hasn’t been tended to nearly as well as you have.

So you move to turn toward him. With how his full length twitches against you in urgency, your own nimble fingers ought to return the favor.

Astarion stops you, placing his unoccupied hand back on your chest to hold you in place. "Ah ah ah. Love, I'm here to help you."

"You are helping,” you start, pushing back against his hand. “But I don’t want to leave you like this.” ‘This’ is obvious as the man clearly exercises every ounce of self control he has judging from the visible veins on his arm, the way his legs squeeze reflexively around you each time he strokes you.

He gives you a reluctant groan, one that does nothing to hide his desire. “Must you always be so selfless?” His hand doesn’t release your chest though, and he begins tracing delicate, wet circles around one of your nipples, as he murmurs, “Fine, just let me continue.”

Staying in place for him, you reach back with one hand to feel for his cock. It’s almost unreal how naturally you slot around him, the way your fingers circle around its girth. The entire length, inch-by-inch, the pattern of his veins, the sensitive lip of his head– they’re all intimately familiar to you now. As is finding just the right grip, the right pace.

When you start to pump him in earnest, Astarion can't help but shudder, his movements losing their steady, pulsing beat. In losing his pace, he takes on a new one– erratic, a bit fumbling, but utterly intoxicating.

You're both stoking each other’s fires in tandem, wildly offset in your desperation to touch each other more and more and more. 

The water feels almost cool compared to your heated core, to the sweet friction you're building together.

Astarion's face tilts into your back, grunting as he strains to right his tempo– his forehead presses against you, his cool exhale grazes your searing skin. His chilled touch is a reprieve in the sweltering fog of steam and heady lust. Hearing your sigh of relief, he seems all too willing to make more contact.

His lips crash onto your back roughly, and his fangs nick your skin. An involuntary shiver runs through your body as you imagine the pleasure his drinking evokes from you. As you imagine the man behind you lapping at your neck, moaning in satisfaction, flushed pink with your very blood–

"Take some blood,” you offer, breathless. Imagining would never be enough, you find yourself craving the real deal. So when you say your next word, it comes out more pleading than you intend, “Please."

“Whatever my dearest desires,” Astarion replies, voice low and rumbling. He removes the hand from your chest and places it on your shoulder, holding you in place as he places his lips at the crook of your neck. His nose rubs gently against your fleshly washed skin. “Mmm, you smell so good.”

Then his fangs pierce you.

When you first began your relationship, you hadn’t intended to enjoy his bites as much as you do, but after years and years of them, the pain hardly registers now. All you feel is close– So very close to the man you would gladly give your lifeblood to.

He draws a gulp, and you feel the blood course through you, into him.

Another drink, and heat builds in you as you feel his cock grow harder in your hand, his veins more prominent.

A third long pull of your blood, and you feel his fingers quicken at your aching arousal.

You jerk into his hand in reaction, trying to seek an outlet for your pleasure. Your mouth emits a whimper– you hadn’t been comfortable whimpering with Astarion at first, but after he drew one out of you, he couldn’t get enough.

He still can’t, and you feel his lips curl into a smile at your neck, his fingers move with more urgency.

All the while you continue stroking his length, fingers sloppy in your own hazy state. It doesn’t seem like you need your usual dexterity though, because Astarion is practically writhing with newfound reactivity. Drinking blood always leaves him especially sensitive.

One last shaky swallow and he removes his fangs from your neck. But not his mouth. His tongue begins lavishing your puncture wound furiously as he struggles to hold back his approaching peak.

With the way he haphazardly tilts his hips into you, it’s all too evident to you that he’s reaching his limit. He’s not afraid to tell you so either.

"My sweet," he all but moans into your ear. "I–I can't last much longer. May I?"

You know what he means, and you honestly can’t last much longer either– you’re positively light-headed from a mixture of bliss and blood loss. So you stop your movements, nod your addled head at him.

He removes his hands from your core and neck, reaching out to your legs. Pulling them out and apart, he shuffles behind you, moving impatiently.

Realizing he can’t do this alone, he gestures, motioning for you to put your legs up.

Still a bit dizzy, you carefully place each leg on either side of the tub’s edges, hooking yourself in place by the ankles. It feels a precarious balance, but you can hardly care when you’re this eager to have Astarion inside you.

Astarion seems just as eager, rubbing his length against your ass hungrily as you get into position.

Perched and ready for him, the man is quick to help once more– his hands grip your asscheeks and lift in a swift movement. You’re particularly buoyant in the water, and you rise higher than either of you had expected. Your hand instinctively reaches out, gripping the edge of the tub to brace yourself, and you hear Astarion give a deep chuckle from behind you.

Holding back your own almost giddy excitement, you try to compose yourself for him. Angling your hips up, you’re almost floating on the water for a moment as Astarion lines the tip of his cock with your entrance.

However, you’re instinctively clenching a second later when a pair of your lover’s fingers tease at your opening. You barely avoid clamping your legs back together at the sensation. 

Recovering from the tickling probe, you look back to see a lust-drunk fanged smile, lips smeared with red. "Astarion, please,” you mutter. “I can't balance like this all day."

"Come darling, I know you’re quite talented," he taunts, easily gliding his fingers back in, curling until you truly do begin to lose balance.

"Astarion," you breathe out, clutching the side of the tub even harder to stay afloat.

Then his fingers slip back out, replaced a moment later by the head of his cock. “No need to worry, I have a seat for you right here.”

His palms cup your backside, his fingers squeeze, as you lower your hips back down, taking in his entire, slick length effortlessly in the water.

“Now isn’t that better?” he asks, grabbing your hips with one hand, the other finding yours on the side of the tub for support.

“Mmm,” is all that you manage, as you adjust to the sudden fullness. You haven’t lain with anyone else in so long, it’s hard to remember a cock other than his. Still, you can’t help but feel like he settles in you just right. Especially when you both slot together neatly, you taking him to the hilt.

Astarion drops another kiss on your back. “Comfortable?”

“Mhm,” you mumble. Now that you’re securely held in place by Astarion’s hips flush to yours, your legs hanging off the tub’s edges, you place your second hand back at your aching arousal. You begin to stroke yourself back into the same fervor Astarion had you in moments ago.

After a small, deliberate thrust of his hips, testing how you rise and fall in the water, Astarion starts moving against you. It’s slow at first, the water rippling out from you both in small waves. Then his hips rock back, only to drive back into you with sloshing force. 

“A–ahh!” Sweet hells, he knows exactly how to hit your most sensitive spot. You had already been so heated, but now, with your lover’s full, hardened length pressing into you? You feel dizzy with pleasure.

Years of lovemaking, and you’re still in awe of how well he knows your body. It’s more than his previous experiences culminating in some kind of skillful paramour. No, this was built through time, trial, error, effort.

So as this gorgeous man you call love bounces you up and down in his lap, you feel yourself coming undone. Your breaths come ragged as you ride his cock, water spilling out of the tub with each and every buck. Your fingers clench the tub, barely holding on as you feel your pleasure coil tighter and tighter.

Astarion places kiss after kiss down your back, and you hear him murmuring, "Gods you're perfect." A harder kiss. "You feel so good." Another thrust. "Each." A nip at your skin. "And every." A thrust. "Time." Another kiss. "I–I love you."

For your part, you’re finding entire sentences difficult. With the feel of him throbbing inside you, the way his lips feel along your back, each roll of his hips, you're truly only capable of a few phrases. "Astarion." A splashing bounce. "I love you–" A loll back of your head. "Oh hells–" A dip of your hips. "I love you too."

When your peak finally runs through you like a shockwave, when you clench around him in ecstasy, those very same words are still on your lips. "I l–love you."

He moans at the sudden tightness, the muscles that now hold him deep within you. "Darling," he breathes. "Oh love. I can't–"

Astarion means to say that he can't hold on much longer. He'd already been so close, holding back only to keep your pleasure going. So you reach down to his fingers on your hip, as best as you can while still hanging on for dear life, and squeeze his hand. A wordless affirmation, a plea to join you, as he always has.

And it’s that silent communication that has his fingers lacing through yours, his neck craning back, his hips stuttering.

When he comes, there's no pretense or performance. There hasn't been for many years. So when you look back at his face in a hazy fuzz of emotion, the expression you see is utterly unbridled.

It's a look of sheer pleasure– his perfectly pale skin flushed a light rosy color, his usually impeccable hair stuck to his face in a mixture of sweat and water. His eyes are shut, his mouth agape as he spills into you.

So enraptured are you by the mundane beauty of his climax, that you’ve strained too far from your precariously balanced position. Your foot unhooks from the tub’s slippery edge and you fall onto Astarion’s lap with a large splash as he finishes. You’re both left panting and wet in the wake of both your and the tub’s peaks.

Water drips down your face, all of the soap bottles have been knocked from the edge of the tub. The high you’d felt just moments ago feels doused in the stark reality of making love in a bathtub. 

However, when you feel Astarion’s breathy laughter on your back, feel his softening cock twitch with his last few thrusts, you know he’s still in fine spirits.

You stay together for a few moments as you both collect yourselves. Water is wiped from eyes, your second leg comes back into the tub, and several deep breaths are had. Once you’re relatively sorted, Astarion pulls himself out of you with a long, happy sigh.

The man falls back from you, sitting against the end of the tub in a tired flop. Then he’s patting the water in front of him, motioning you to join him in some post-coital cuddles.

You don’t need much more of an invitation.

Floating through the now much lower water, you stop just in front of him. Movements relaxed, you wrap your legs around his waist, your arms around his neck, and scoot into his waiting embrace.

"So," you start, looking at the wasteland of water and strewn soap bottles around the tub. "Looks like we made a mess."

"I told you we would," he says, closing his arms around you, pulling you against his chest.

"I know," you say, leaning into him comfortably. Your body is truly exhausted now, but your mind is a buzz of joy. "It was worth it though."

He laughs into your shoulder, squeezes you tighter. "Feeling better, I take it?"

"Gods yes," you say, tilting your head into his silver hair. "Thank you."

"Oh my sweet, it was my utmost pleasure," he replies, and you can feel his smile on your skin.

You both lean back, grinning at each other like fools. The smiles stay, even when your lips meet in a soft, wet kiss.

You will need to clean the room, the tub, likely your bodies once again– but all you can truly feel right now is content. Enjoying Astarion’s gentle fingers as they trace a pattern onto your skin, the warm water all around you, you very nearly forget that today was merely a day like any other.

The thousandth time you made love to Astarion, it was messy and wet and silly– somehow, it was sweet, caring, and loving all the same.

The thousandth time you made love to Astarion, you didn't know it was the thousandth time.

Just as you hadn't known your tenth thousand kiss, nor your hundred thousandth 'I love you.' Were anyone to ask you about them, you might not even remember the days or events surrounding any of them.

What you do know is that each individual moment holds no less importance, that the affection shared between you doesn’t diminish with each recurrence.

You’re unable to quantify your love, nor would you want to. All you really want is Astarion– his soft lips, tender hands, and whispered words of love– until your dying breath.

[xx-like-a-villian-xx]

I'd Love To Watch

You’re forced to share a room with Noah and he wonders what book you’re reading.

This one is for all my dark romance reading babes, stay slay 🥀

My ao3 is HERE

Also let me know if you want to be tagged in anything upcoming posts, (I have so many WIPs)

CW: one bed trope (ugh my fave), mentions of dark romance, fingering, Noah is a MUNCH, squirting, forced proximity (let me know if I need to add any more)

18+ MDNI | Noah Sebastian x Reader

“Are you kidding me?” You groan, staring at the second suitcase in the bedroom that you called dibs on when you arrived at the Airbnb. “Matt, who put their shit in my room?” You call out to your best friend and tour manager who walks towards you, a smug smirk on his face.

”Well Noah kept saying he would take the couch but there’s a California King in there so I told him he should just bunk in with you tonight.” He leans against the doorframe, grinning. “Call it team building.”

”Team building?” You scoff, exasperated.

All you want is one night to yourself without being stuck in a bus full of sweaty guys and Matt thinks it's funny to let the man you’ve been trying to avoid all tour share your room.

Noah doesn’t like you, it’s been clear since day one. Every time he talks to you he’s so patronising and cocky it makes your blood boil but it’s not like you can say much. You’re just their merch girl after all, replaceable. If it wasn’t for Matt you wouldn’t even have the opportunity so you keep your mouth closed and stay out of Noah’s way unless it’s important.

“Does Noah know that we’re sharing?” You fold your arms over your chest, staring at your best friend.

Matt chuckles. “More than aware, he actually seemed fine with it.” Your eyebrow raises in surprise and he laughs. “Goodnight, Y/N.”

You watch Matt retreat to his room and get to work pulling your pyjamas out from your suitcase, locking yourself in the bathroom to get ready for what you now know is going to be a hell of a long night.

While brushing your teeth you hear someone shuffle into the bedroom and you groan internally. Spitting the toothpaste into the sink, you gather your discarded clothes from the day and take a deep breath before opening the en-suite door.

Noah is lying spread eagle on the bed, wearing a pair of basketball shorts with no top, scrolling on his phone. He doesn’t even acknowledge your presence when you put your things back into your suitcase. You roll your eyes, grabbing your book to sit in the window seat across from the bed for a while, quietly reading to yourself. The silence is thick and you can hear his heavy breathing, distracting you from your book.

Your eyes flick from the dark romance novel to the man on the bed, eyes trailing over the expanses of ink that cover his toned skin and you feel heat pooling in your core.

”Anyone ever told you it’s rude to stare?” His voice breaks you out of your trance and your eyes flick back to the words on the page.

You scoff. “I wasn’t staring, you just breathe really loud and it’s pissing me off.”

He chuckles darkly. “Yeah, sure thing sweetheart.”

The sound of movement reaches your ears but you daren’t look at him, lifting the book higher to hide your red face. Suddenly the novel is snatched from your hands and you scramble to grab it back from him.

”Heartless Heathens?” He hums, holding the book out of your reach as he reads the blurb then flicks through a couple of pages, eyes widening. “Jesus, Y/N. I didn’t realise you were into this kinky shit.”

Your face is tomato red, burning hot as you try to wrestle the book from his hands.

“Noah give me my book back!”

All he does is laugh, eyes flicking back and forth as he reads the page I had bookmarked. “Oh my god! ‘Does that tight pussy hurt when my fat cock stretches it out like this?’ Wow…”

His dark eyes meet yours and you squeeze them shut out of embarrassment, hiding your face with your hands.

”You like that shit, huh?” You can hear the amusement in his voice as steps forward, throwing the book down on the window seat. You want the ground to swallow you up when you feel him staring down at you.

You huff, removing your hands from your face. “Loads of people do, it’s just a book.”

“I mean, do you like that stuff? Guys talking to you like that in bed? Asking you if it hurts when they stretch you out on their cock?”

You laugh, he’s joking right? You look up at him and your mouth goes dry when you see his dark eyes, pupils blown wide with lust.

”I don’t know,” you shrug. “I haven’t been with anyone for a couple of years, I don’t really have the time.”

Noah looks taken aback at your words and his lips turn up into a smirk. “A pretty girl like you? Surely you have guys begging for a chance in every state we visit.”

You chortle, crossing your arms. “Unlike most guys, I don’t need sex.”

He scoffs, picking the book back up. “So you just read this casually?”

”Most of the time.”

”And the rest of the time?”

The hot flush returns to your cheeks, reaching the tips of your ears. “That’s none of your business.”

He starts to flick through the pages again, humming as he reads. “Can I take a guess?”

You roll your eyes. “Whatever, go ahead.” You throw yourself down onto the bed, sitting against the headboard as he paces, reading.

“I think you like this Corvin guy most, I can imagine you getting all hot and bothered when you read his parts and you can’t help but find yourself fingerfucking yourself in your bunk when everyone is asleep.” His head tilts when he stops to look at you, his eyes searching for the telltale signs of your arousal, grinning when he sees your thighs clench together. “Am I correct?”

You shake your head in disbelief. What’s his game and why is he trying to get under your skin over some book. Your underwear feels damp from the wetness that is pooling at your core from his words and you have to stop yourself from lunging at him, to either punch him or kiss him…you’re unsure which one would be more satisfying.

”C’mon Y/N, tell me.” He sits next to you, pointing at a section where the main character is riding Corvin. “Is this what you get off to?”

You feel all too hot and bothered with him sitting next to you with his shirt off, tattooed skin taunting you as he tries to coerce the secrets of your alone time out of you.

”If I wasn’t in here right now is that what you’d be doing? Getting off over your little dark romance book?”

”What’s your deal Noah? Why do you want to know about all this?” You sit up straighter and he lounges back, eyeing you humorously.

He shrugs. “It’s just cute that you read this horny stuff. I never took you as the type to get riled up by it, is all.”

”You’d be surprised.” You mumble and his eyebrows shoot up in surprise.

”You read worse?”

”Oh shut up, Noah. It’s just dumb fiction, why are we even still talking about this?”

He turns to his side, propping himself up on his elbow, eyes burning into the side of your head. “Because I can tell how hot and bothered you are right now and it’s kind of sexy, I must admit.”

You gulp at his words, staring straight ahead in a conscious effort not to look at him or all of your resolve might falter.

”So tell me, were you so pissed about having to share this room because you wanted some special alone time tonight with your little smut novel?”

You can feel his smirk and the tension in the room thickens, turning into a storm cloud of lust.

”You can still do it, you know.”

Your eyes finally dart to his smug face and your eyebrows furrow. “What?”

He shrugs casually. “You can still get yourself off, I could read to you if you want?”

Your swallow thickly, your core throbbing at his words. “No, that’s weird.”

Noah chuckles. “Masturbation isn’t we-“

”I fucking know that! What’s weird is you’re my boss and you’re offering to read to me while I make myself cum. Do you hear yourself?”

You can’t lie to yourself, the offer is almost too tempting. It’s not fair that the most attractive man you know is basically offering to help you get your rocks off but he hates you right? He’s always so moody and weird around you. Why is he being like this?

He sits up, scooting closer so your shoulders are touching and he leans close to your ear, his breath tickling the skin of your cheek. “Or I could tell you every wicked little fantasy I’ve had about you since you waltzed into the studio with Matt all those years back.’

Your eyebrows raise and you turn to him, his mouth just inches from yours. “You fantasise about me?”

He laughs, a smug sound that makes you want to punch him. “Oh yeah, my favourite is the one where I get to bend you over and rip apart those fishnets you love to wear, the ones with the lace flowers on.” His eyes darken as he reminisces over the lewd thoughts and your mind wanders.

How would it feel to have his hands all over you, tearing away those expensive tights that you adore? How would it feel to have him buried to the hilt inside you as he pushes your head into whatever surface he can find? Fuck its all too much.

”Noah, we shouldn’t talk about this stuff.” You try to reason with yourself but your resolve quickly disappears when his long inked finger trails up the bare skin of your thigh, stopping at the hem of your silky black pyjama shorts.

“Why? We’re both adults.” He smiles almost innocently.

”Because you don’t like me.”

He huffs out a laugh. “Since when? Didn’t I just tell you that I literally think about how I want to bend you over?”

You roll your eyes. “You literally talk to me like shit the majority of the time.”

”I like watching you squirm.” His smile is cocky and it only sends more electricity to your core because he’s right, he does make you squirm and you like it too.

A lust filled silence lingers in the air as he stares into your eyes, a smirk plastered on his lips.

”So do you still want to get yourself off, I’d love to watch.” He cocks an eyebrow and there it is, the last of your resolve leaving out the window.

”Fine.”

He’s like a kid in a candy shop when he sits up, watching you lie down on the bed. Your heart hammers in your chest as you close your eyes, trying to pretend he isn’t there. You slide the silk shorts down your legs, leaving the black lace thong on and your hand travels over the soft fabric, running over the damp patch that is only getting bigger.

You gasp when you slide your hand between the fabric, fingers slipping between your slick folds, easily finding the sensitive bundle of nerves that's been begging to be touched since you walked out of the bathroom to find Noah sprawled out shirtless on the bed. Oh how you wanted to just climb on top of him, to sink down on his cock like you owned him.

A quiet whimper escapes your lips when you circle your clit, slowly teasing yourself to the images of Noah’s cock buried deep inside your cunt. You feel him shift next to you to get a better look at your movements, how your fingers move under the dark lace of your panties. You hear him take a shaky breath and it sends shockwaves to your sensitive core.

“Does that feel good?” His voice is deep, coarse in your ear and you whine out a confirmation, moving your fingers faster over your clit. “God, you don’t know how good you sound. Do you like it when I talk to you?”

”Y-yes.” You sigh and he chuckles.

”Such a good girl.” He whispers, breath tickling your ear. “Do you want me to tell you what to do, huh? Do you want to be good for me and remove your underwear so I can see how you touch that pretty little pussy? God, I bet it’s so perfect.”

You whimper, using your spare hand to push the lace down your thighs, kicking them off as you toy with yourself. Noah leans forward, a hand landing on your thigh to pull your legs further apart and a feral groan leaves his throat when you spread yourself open for him to see just how wet you are, fingers covered in wet slick.

”Oh fuck, you look so good sweetheart. Show me how you bury those pretty fingers in there.”

You push two fingers into your core, the wet sound reaching your ears. You don’t think you’ve ever been this turned on in your life. You hear Noah’s breathing quicken as he watches you fuck yourself with your fingers, soft moans leaving your bitten lips.

”Doing so fucking well for me.” The praise feels like heaven when it meets your ears and you speed up, curling your fingers upwards. “Fuck, what I would do to bury my own fingers inside you.”

”Please.” You whine, opening your eyes to look at him, your breath coming out in pants when his lust blown eyes meet yours.

“Please what?” He smirks, tucking a piece of stray hair behind your ear as you find your clit again, rubbing your soaked fingers over the sensitive bud.

“I need your fingers inside me, please.” You’re so fucking needy and you can tell how much he gets off on it by how his smirk grows into a cruel grin and he holds his fingers against your plump lips.

”Are you gonna suck them for me? Get them nice and wet like the good little slut you are?” Your eyes roll back at his words and he gasps when your tongue swirls around the calloused pads of his fingers, soaking them with your saliva.

He pushes two long fingers into your warm mouth and you hollow your cheeks around them, staring up at him with innocent eyes that make his aching cock strain against his shorts. He pulls his fingers out with a pop and trails them down the valley of your clothed chest, down your navel to where your own fingers are still toying with your clit. Your eyes follow and your hand moves, giving him full access to where you need him most.

”You gonna watch me fuck you with my fingers huh?” He smiles sweetly, sliding his fingers up and down your drenched folds teasingly.

You nod, leaning up on your elbows to watch his slender fingers disappear between your folds, rubbing tight circles around your clit and you gasp his name, your mouth falling open at the immense pleasure. He chuckles, sliding them to your entrance to gather the wetness that pools there, moving back to your clit to play with it all too slowly.

”Please Noah.” You whine and he tuts.

”Be patient, I’ll get there. I want a better look.”

He moves to lie between your legs, pushing your legs further apart to get a good look at your glistening cunt. You can feel his breath hot against you and you could just cum right there without him even touching you, especially with how he looks up at you through those long lashes, eyes black and predatory like he wants to eat you whole.

“You’ve got such a perfect pussy, fuck.” He groans, pushes his long middle finger in, the dark ink disappearing inch by inch inside your cunt and you moan louder than expected, your hand flying to your mouth to keep yourself quiet. “Fuck, it feels so good, so soft.”

A second finger joins the first and he slowly curls them, finding that spot that leaves you seeing stars, your eyes rolling back, your head lolling back on your shoulders. His spare hand grips your inner thigh with a bruising hold and you're sure there will be bruises there tomorrow but you don’t mind, it feels like heaven.

”My mouth is so close to your pussy I can practically taste you.” He growls and your hips buck, pushing his fingers even deeper inside you. He chuckles darkly. “Do you want me to taste you?”

You sob, nodding enthusiastically.

”Use your words, pretty girl.” He hums, kissing your pelvic bone.

”Please taste me.”

He hums, his hot tongue dragging over your folds before his lips close around your clit, leaving you gobsmacked from how fucking good his tongue feels against you with his fingers fucking into you.

You’re close, you can feel that tightness building in your lower abdomen, so fucking close. His fingers curl faster, his tongue lapping over your clit like you’re the last water source on Earth and you’re falling. Your legs shake, a feral groan leaving your lips as your orgasm rips through your body like a fucking tornado. His fingers only move faster as his lips leave your sensitive clit and you're tipping over the edge again just as quickly, gushing around his fingers and the bed sheets below.

”Fuck, good girl!” He grins, lapping your sweet nectar from your thighs. “Think you’ve got another?”

You have no time to protest, he rises to slide between your thighs, fingers still buried deep inside your cunt as he stares down at you, curling them fast exactly where he knows he can drag another orgasm from you. His free hand covers your mouth when you cum again, screaming into his palm, soaking the front of his shorts where his leaking cock strains against them.

”Good fucking girl, well done!” He kisses your forehead, pulling his drenched hand away from your sensitive core to suck his fingers clean.

You stare at him in bewilderment when he smiles down at you. You’re in shock at how much you just came for a man you thought hated you half an hour ago.

”I think I need to catch you reading more.” He chuckles.

”Shut the fuck up.” You roll your eyes, pulling him into a searing kiss.

︵‿︵‿୨♡୧‿︵‿︵

“So you two didn’t kill each other last night?” Matt smirks when you make your way downstairs in the morning, wearing one of Noah’s shirts with him freshly showered following behind you.

Folio storms past, looking a little worse for wear. “I would’ve preferred it if they did, I need to bleach my ears.” He groans, pouring himself a mug of coffee.

You blush bright red, throwing a grape at the drummer and Noah wraps his arms around your torso, pulling you into his lap.

”Guess my plan worked then.” Matt chuckles, popping a grape in his mouth with a grin.

[redrose10]

I hope this is okay! This one was requested for Yoongi, Namjoon, or Hobi and I went with Yoongi.

#4 I should’ve told you a long time ago

#23 We have to be quiet

Warnings: Angst, swearing, Teen pregnancy

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

You felt like you’d just seen a ghost. The man standing in front of you being the same man that broke your heart fifteen years ago when he decided his career was more important than you or your relationship.

“Hi Y/N, sorry to just show up announced. I was back in the area and thought I’d stop by.”, he smiled a familiar heart stopping smile.

Against your better judgement you invited him in. Once the coffee was finished brewing you put two cups down on the table before taking a seat across from him.

“Okay Yoongi, how did you find me and what do you want?”, you spat.

He was a little taken back by your cold attitude, “I got your address from Mia. I just wanted to see you. Make sure you’re doing okay. It’s been a while.” You made a mental note to scold your best friend the next time you saw her.

“Well you can see I’m okay so finish your coffee and go. I’m sure you’ve got a hotel room full of women and booze waiting for you.”

“Seriously Y/N? That’s how you’re going to talk to me? Even after all these years.”, he questioned.

After breaking up with you and once his career took off Yoongi became somewhat of a hard partying womanizer. Always being photographed with a different woman every night or stumbling out of random clubs if he wasn’t thrown out. He’s been married three times, but claims only one was legit and the other two were just drunken mistakes. Sometimes you were glad he let you go. Maybe he did you a favor after all.

“I’m sorry Yoongi. It’s just late and I’ve worked all day. I wasn’t expecting company, especially not you.”, you said.

“I understand. I won’t stay long. I just wanted to check on you and finally apologize for everything.”

Before you could respond you heard the front door open and shut and soon after your teenage daughter appeared in the kitchen.

“How was work baby?”, you asked trying to calm your nerves and appear normal.

“Ugh well I’m covered in grease and pizza sauce, but I’m another day closer to affording a car.”, she replied grabbing a drink out of the refrigerator.

“That’s right Anna. You know the deal, I’ll match however much you come up with so the more you save the better of a car you can get.”

“Alright well then get ready because I want to have a similar one to the Porsche that is currently parked in the drive way.”, she chuckled before looking at Yoongi with wide eyes.

“Anna this is an old friend of mine. His name is Yoongi. And Yoongi this is my daughter Anna.”

Yoongi curiously looked her over before giving her a wave. Anna politely said goodbye before mumbling something about needed to scrub the pizza grease off and running upstairs.

“How old is she?”, Yoongi immediately questioned.

“She is about 15 years old.”, you cringed because you already knew what he was thinking.

“Mmhm I see. And her father is…?”

You nodded, “Her father is sitting at this kitchen table right now.”

He jumped back until he was flush against the wall, “What the fuck Y/N? What the fuck? All these years? All these years and you never once thought to tell me you gave birth to our daughter? To my daughter?!”

Just as fast you ran to him placing your hand over his mouth, “We have to be quiet. She doesn’t know about you or us. Let’s go upstairs and talk.”

He nodded as you took his hand leading him towards your bedroom where you could make sure the door was closed and locked.

Once inside you heard Yoongi laugh. “What is so funny?”, you questioned.

“Oh I don’t know. I guess because the last time you snuck me up to your room it ended with you getting pregnant and me not finding out about for fifteen years.”, he hissed.

Your blood started boiling, “Look, I should’ve told you a long time ago. I admit that. But you’re the one that broke up with me without even asking what I wanted.“

“Because I wanted to protect you. I knew I couldn’t give you the relationship you deserved with how much time and energy I had to put in my music. We weren’t even adults yet. I was young and dumb and didn’t know how to handle all the changes.”

“Maybe I would’ve been okay with that. Maybe I would’ve been okay with what little you could give me instead of nothing at all.”, you whispered hearing your voice become unsteady.

Yoongi still knowing you well knew that was a telltale sign that you were about to cry so he sat down on the bed and pulled you down next to him while while running soothing circles on your back.

“Did you know you were pregnant the day I broke up with you?”, his voice cracking at the end.

Too scared to speak you nodded your head.

“So why didn’t you tell me? I would’ve taken care of you, both of you.”

“That’s why I didn’t tell you. After you told me that you got an offer from a record label and were moving to the city to pursue your career I didn’t want to be the reason you gave that up. You were so close to achieving your dreams and a girlfriend and a baby would have only made it harder.”

He ran his hands over his face in frustration and maybe a little anger, “Fuck Y/N, I can’t believe you’ve been doing this along all these years. How could you hide this from me?”

“It wasn’t bad. My parents helped when they could. I have friends. We’ve been doing okay.”

“She’s beautiful.”, he said after a while causing you to giggle, “Of course she is. She looks like you in a wig.”

You continued, “She’s really smart and kind. She’s so thoughtful. She has a big interest in music. Just like her father. She’s a big fan too. She’s probably freaking out in her room right now. I don’t know how she kept it together downstairs. ”

He smiled at the thought.

The room fell into an awkward silence after that.

“Well I better get back to my hotel. It’s really late. Maybe I can come back and get to know her more. If that’s okay with both of you.”, he said standing up.

“Yoongi wait!”, you leaned forward to stop him, “Um what if you spent the night? You can have breakfast with us in the morning and we can talk about everything. The three of us.”

He nodded and crawled back into bed making sure to leave a comfortable space between the two of you but reaching for your hand to let you know it’ll all work out in the end.

[stolasdearest]

I want to cuck Adam so bad dude. I want to fuck Lucifer knowing he'd hear/see. I want to make him watch while Lucifer fucks me into the mattress better than he ever could.

Could you write something like that? Completely understandable if you don't want to write cuckolding stuff, have a good day

Lucifer x Reader˚₊· ͟͟͞͞➳❥

Warnings: Not proofread, I can't write smut

Reader is female

Adam groaned and whined, he had been called to Hell for an "urgent meeting" with Lucifer, What he wanted he wasn't sure; the Extermination wasn't for another long while and he couldn't possibly think what other subject Lucifer would possibly wanna talk about.

This whole ordeal annoyed Adam, having had a date with his wife that day he was disruptively summoned down below; Especially being told by Sera to appear in person as Lucifer had asked. Why would he need to be there in person; ugh whatever he was just going to get it over with..Speaking of his wife where was she today? You weren't next to him when he woke up and your phone went straight to voicemail.

Going through a portal he arrived in the Hall of the Angelic tower in the middle of pride, Adam being completely over this already groaned and scratched his neck clearing his throat as he had looked around; walking down the corridor he was quickly pulled from whatever train of thought ran through his head upon hearing a melodic voice echoing through the halls, euphoric whines and whimpers echoed out from a meeting room; it took him awhile to pick up why the sounds sounded familiar it was the same string of noises his wife made only this time they..sounded more real, more genuine, Sensual.

Every muscle in his body stiffened the realization setting in what was happening, nobody but those morningstar's entered this building and the meeting? Oh Lucifer you fucking asswipe. Wanting to confirm his suspicions he slowly, quietly made his way to the door, his pants tightening hearing the noises you made becoming louder, he sucked in a breath before cracking up the door and peeking inside, his blood began to boil; watching your back flush against the cold marble table your hands intertwined with that dickheads hands; Lucifers hip sharply snapping against yours while his teeth grazed your soft neck; bites and hickeys already evident on your collarbone and shoulders; Lucifer only adding more with a low chuckle. His raspy chuckle vibrating in the room while his six wings fluttered gently behind him, His eyes full of Admiration and love for a woman that isn't his.

"does it feel good, Dollface? Do I fuck you better then that pompous prick you call a husband does, Hm?"

Adam's hand clenched to the point his knuckles turn white, hearing a mewl from your mouth while you wrap your legs around Lucifer's waist, his forked tongue licking up a stray droplet of blood caused by his sharp teeth, he had heard the door open and Adam arriving and he made sure Adam knew that he knew, Side eyeing him whilst he angled your leg, a loud moan ringing through the room as he hit that spot you loved so much while you slapped a hand over your mouth

"well, Darling. Answer my question"

"yes, yes! Your cock is the best I've ever had.."

"good..~"

His voice laced with condescension that you didn't pick up as Lucifer kept his eyes on the peaking Adam, His hands slid down your body as he placed gentle kisses down your chest; He had had you completely at his mercy, Making you forget what time was as you squirmed under his burning touch, and he was going to give you a ride, and Adam a show he'd never forget

Authors note : I need to get better at Writing..I dont like this.

Taglist: @k1y0yo @ihavetoomanyfictionalcrushes

Comment or send an ask to be added to the taglist

[kingofbodyrolls]

BTS fic recs: my 30th birthday special

Shit. I’m turning 30 today (I still feel like I’m 18 lol) 😯 So I wanted to make this special recommendation list for you, as a birthday present from me 💜 This includes some of my all time favorites (no, I’ll never stop screaming about those!!!!) and also, some good old ones that I’ve never gotten around to rec at the time. 

I also have another birthday present for you (wish is also why I didn’t finish my reading list and why ‘Friendcation’ is on pause until after my birthday). I wrote a short one-shot, so if you’re in the mood for that, check it out → ‘Say that Again (I Dare You)’ [reader x jjk (ft. pjm)].

I actually didn’t get to finish my reading list for this special rec list, so I’ll add the rest of my recommendations as I read them (I’ll specify which I haven’t re-read yet) and the rest will be posted to this month’s regular rec list.

I want to thank each and every writer on this list for creating such wonderful stories and art - you are truly amazing ✨ All the fics on this list hold a dear place in my heart 🥹

❗Most of these fics are smutty as hell or contains dark themes, so minors dni.❗ 

If you read anything on this list and you like it, please leave a comment to the writer or reblog the original fic’s post 💜And if you want more fic recs you can follow me to stay updated 🙂

BTS fic rec index → May | Jun | Jul | Aug | Sep (jjk)(knj) | Oct (pjm) | Nov (💜) | Dec (ksj)(kth) |

Emoji meaning → angst = 🌩️, smut = 🥵, fluff = 🥰, comedy = 😂, yandere = 😈, thriller/dark = 👻.

Namjoon

⭐All Night by @luaspersona // knj x f.reader // college!au, brother’s best friend!au, s2l // 🥵

📝 When your brother bails on you, you have to find another way to entertain yourself for the night and Kim Namjoon just so happens to be a great company.

🗨️ This was the most perfect, pure masterpiece of fucking gold writing 🤌🏾🥵 it is insanely filthy, so deliciously smutty!! Like I think my soul has left my body 🥵 the writing, story and the characters were brilliant ✨ this is hands down one of my new favorites and I WILL read this again soon, I promise you! Don’t sleep on this sweet bad boy Namjoon, okay 🥵 such an easy recommendation for me to make - do yourself a favor and read it if you haven’t (and if you have, then read it again!) ��️💯

⭐All Aboard! (the passion express) by @ve1vetyoongi // knj x f.reader // office worker!namjoon // 🥵

📝 There were not many things that got your blood boiling in the same way that two simple words could. Kim Namjoon. The name of your irritating and (unfortunately enough, as the universe would have it) incredibly handsome co-worker. Which is exactly why you never expected to find your self on your knees for him on the train home.

🗨️ Holy fuck, fuck, fuck this was so incredibly filthy (in the best way possible) 🥵 the tension between reader and Namjoon was perfect, the build up was so satisfying 🌟 what’s not to like ✨😍

⭐The Wedding Arrangement by @sugaurora // knj x f.reader // ‘enemies’ to friends to lovers, wedding!au // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 Unfortunately, he’s just gotten engaged to someone who isn’t you. Even more unfortunately, he expects you to help plan the wedding alongside Kim Namjoon, his other best friend and, based on your first meeting, just another judgmental jerk. Putting aside your distaste for the sake of your friend’s happiness, you both set about giving Seokjin the wedding of his dreams. Following a rough and satisfying affair at the caterer’s, you strike an unusual deal: you and Namjoon will be enemies with benefits until the wedding is over. And after six months of wedding planning, you both just might learn that weddings aren’t usually the end, but a brand new beginning.

🗨️ This was so amazing 🥹 the characters had so much depth and ugh! It was just so, so good. It was a pleasure reading their love unfolding 🥰 aish, I’m soft! It’s filled with plenty of soft, slight heartbreaking angst at times, but oh so fluffy and smutty too! It was perfect 👌🏾 💯 please don’t sleep on this one, okay? 🥹

Yoongi

⭐Roommates by @automnesleaves [AO3] [119K] // myg x f.reader // roommates!au, covid!au, slice of life // 😂🥰🌩️

📝 February 2020: Your best friend Jimin’s roommate recommendation, IT guy Yoongi Min, moves in with you. March 2020: Covid Lockdown.

🗨️ This is really, really good! I remember being so hooked on this, that I stayed up multiple nights to finish chapters. It was hard to put down, and so interesting to read how readers luck slowly turned – also, the dynamic between reader and Yoongi is great and there’s just so much lovely slice of life in it 💜

⭐Three Tangerines [series; ongoing] by @kithtaehyung // myg x f.reader // fuckboy!yoongi, brother’s best friend!au, age gap!au // 🌩️🥵

📝 Throughout high school, you sometimes caught glimpses of your brother’s older friends: some of them were sweet, some of them were smart. but the one closest to him? that guy was a total f*ckboy from day one. after a foray of horrid relationships spanning years - ending with one that broke up with you for an alarming reason - you needed advice on what the hell you were doing wrong… and this wasn’t a conversation for anyone sweet or smart.

🗨️ Yes. This is here again. It is one of my all-time favorites and I will not stop screaming about how fucking good this is! You just have to join the 3tan party or you are severely missing out, Doll. 💖✨

⭐Oh, darling! [series; completed] by @yoongiofmine // myg x f.reader // university!au, non idol au, professor!yoongi, student!reader // 🥰🌩️🥵

📝 Starting your second semester at one of South Korea’s most prestigious universities should be stressful enough. Between juggling classes, good grades and a social life, your plate was full. Hoping to spice up your academic career, you thought it was a good idea to enroll as an assistant for your literature professor, whom you’ve held a very secret and very forbidden crush on for the past several months. What will happen now that you’re forced to work closely together? And what if your crush isn’t as one sided as you thought? 

🗨️ Holy fucking shit 🥵🫣😳 This is just one of my favorites series, EVER 💜 This is in my top 10, no questions! ✨

Hoseok

⭐Fate Doesn’t Exist by @whenIseeUsmile [AO3] [47K] // jhs x myg (mxm) // pilot!au, formula1!au // 😂🌩️

📝 Yoongi is a pilot. Hoseok is a Formula 1 driver. Jungkook's a fanboy and Jimin is oblivious.

Yoongi hates people but likes one-night-stands. One in particular but he doesn't like the fact that he's famous. He really shouldn't get involved with Hoseok. He does it anyways.

🗨️ I’ve read this multiple times! And it will forever be one of my favorites! I just love how their personality compliments each other, and how they keep meeting each other (also can’t stay away from each other). Plus, the side couples, both Jungkook x Jimin and Namjoon x Seokjin are just fucking hilarious – everything about this is golden, so if you’re into mxm it’s a really good read! 👏

⭐Flight 18 by @noona-la-la-la [9.5K] // jhs x f. reader // flight!au, idol!au // 🥵😂

📝 Korean Air Flight 18 leaves daily from Los Angeles traveling to Seoul.  You’ve taken this flight before, but this time you’ve got an irritating passenger in the neighboring seat.  Little did you know that he would end up giving you the ride of your life.

🗨️ This was just really really amazing; utterly funny (like I was laughing at certain points), so much sexual tension that evolves into satisfying smut 😗

Jimin

⭐The Airport Couple: P[ass]anger from Hell + Drabble by @dovechim & @jimlingss [8K] // pjm x f.reader // e2l, frequent traveler jimin x tsa agent reader // 😂😂😂🥰

📝 As a TSA agent, you expect your job to be relatively easy, most passengers these days follow the rules to the T in order to avoid prolonging their custom checks. But not a certain Park Jimin, who seems to have a problem understanding what 100ml is, or the very simple fact that gadgets must be taken out of the bag, and bomb jokes are strictly off limits. Frequent traveller Park Jimin is your nemesis, but darn is he a cute one.

🗨️ This is just so fucking hilarious, don’t get me started. I laughed from beginning to end 😂 And it’s still as good as I remember, if not even better??? Like ✨ I’ve highlighted a few of my favorite parts from the fic. I don’t want to give too much away, but these lines are just so damn hilarious! Please go read it, it’s one of my faves 💯

⭐The Airport Couple: Park Jimin’s Cock[pit] by @jimlingss & @dovechim [12K] // pjm x f.reader // pilot!au, bf2l, coworkers!au // 😂🥰🥵

📝 Talk about Angry Birds, and most people would immediately think of the mobile game app. But within your circle of friends, it stands for something else. It’s synonymous with Park Jimin, one of the most talented pilots from your batch who also just happens to have anger issues, or in other words, air rage. He is your best friend, but when you get teamed up with him as his co-pilot, you can only pray that things don’t go south… literally. 

🗨️ I remember reading this a few years ago, and I loved it then and I still do ✨ It is incredibly funny, has good banter and dialogue to match. The chemistry between reader and Jimin is just priceless, their friendship is just pure giggles 🥹 It’s also fluffy and will tug on your heartstrings in the best way possible. Just really, really good and definitely also one of my all-time favorites 💯💜

⭐Since We Met by @inkjam-moon [9.2K] // pjm x f.reader // roommate!au // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 Your in love with your roommate, so you think maybe trying to date someone else will help you get over him, but when your roommate shows signs of jealousy, you begin to wonder; could he like you back?

🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).

⭐Turbulence by @yminie [9.3K] // pjm x f.reader // flight!au // 🥵🥰

📝 On your first flight the cute boy next to you helps to sooth your nerves, and on the second flight he soothes something else.

🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).

⭐Accelerate by @yminie [8.9K] // pjm x f.reader // flight!au // 🥵🥰

📝 Jimin comes to retrieve his jacket on the condition that you then accompany him for dinner, and you can bet he satiates every hunger.

🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).

⭐Beneath the Water by @jungshookz // pjm x reader // fantasy!au + mermaid!au // 🌩️🥵🥰😂

📝 His legs were sparkling. You looked up from his face slowly and towards his legs, your head tilting in confusion when you were met with the sight of… well, it certainly wasn’t a pair of legs. What the fuck?

🗨️ This is just perfect; a tiny bit angst, gold certified comedy and fluff (with a sprinkle of smut). There’s also a bullet point drabble of this, so please check that out too (here).

⭐Make Me by @jikookiekosmos // pjm x reader // office!au, boss!jimin/employee!reader + dom/sub themes // 🥵🥰🌩️

📝 After a bad breakup, you decide to go out one night and drink your sorrows away - that is, until you see your now ex-boyfriend there with someone clinging to his arm. To get your mind off of things, you go back to your job after hours; what you don’t expect is for your boss and CEO of the company, Park Jimin, to show up and offer you help in ways you didn’t know you needed.

🗨️ It has heavy dom/sub themes (which I’m normally not into, but imma switch for this one!). It is incredibly hot and so, so damn perfect 🥵

⭐Pay Attention by @jikookiekosmos // pjm x reader // office!au, boss!jimin/employee!reader + dom/sub themes // 🥵🥰

📝 You’d mentioned it in passing once before, your fantasy about blowing your boss - and now boyfriend - under his desk during one of his important CEO business meetings. So what happens when you want to turn that fantasy into a reality, and he wants it just as much?

🗨️ This is a sequel to ‘Make Me’ (but can be read as a stand-alone) - and it is just pure dirty smut. The dynamic between reader and Jimin is just so good ✨

Jungkook

⭐The Wedding Planners by @gukyi [28K] // jjk x f.reader // e2l, wedding!au // 😂🥰🌩️🥵

📝 Jeon jungkook is three things: cocky, terrible, and your worst enemy. then your best friend hoseok gets engaged to the love of his life, and suddenly jeon jungkook is four things: cocky, terrible, your worst enemy, and the man you will be spending the next seven months with in order to plan your best friend’s wedding. 

🗨️ I also remember reading this a few years ago and it was just a very funny and pleasant reread 💜 What I love about this is one, is definitely the slow-burn and the enemies to lovers aspect too. The banter between reader and Jungkook is just so priceless and reading how their relationship slowly unfolds and develops through the months of the wedding planning was just everything 💯 Hoseok and Yoongi’s personality in this also makes this fic truly amazing.

⭐Secret Slut (1) by @jeonsweetpea [7.7K] // jjk x f.reader (ft. pjm) // office!au, pa!jungkook x ceo!reader // 😂🌩️🥵

📝 Jungkook accidentally gifts you, his boss, a sex toy for Secret Santa.

🗨️ I remember reading this a few years ago and now I see that there’s even a part two to it, that I haven’t read! This one is really funny, like straight up hilarious – really made me laugh at times and then it got so freaking smutty 🥵 Really good!

⭐Secret Slut (2) by @jeonsweetpea [18.1K] // jjk x f.reader + pjm x f. reader // office!au, pa!jungkook, pa!jimin, ceo!reader // 🌩️🥵

📝 After being fired, Jungkook finds himself a new job only to realize he misses you too much. He comes back to discover you’ve hired a new personal assistant, Jimin. You offer him the only job position available, which was being the assistant’s assistant. Being demoted results in Jungkook feeling inadequate and he soon learns what it means to be jealous.

🗨️ I was so speechless after reading the last part of the series, like 🥵🥵🥵🥵 There’s so much smut in this, you’re like swimming in it, lol! And then something happens, that I won’t spoil because I actually didn’t expect that to happen (even though I should have seen it coming, because the build-up was there). So, a really good read! 

⭐Departure by @nomnomsik [6.2K] // jjk x f.reader (ft. jimin) // pilot!au, coworkers!au // 🥵🥰

📝 As a flight attendant for Korean Air, you’re scheduled for a thirteen-hour flight to Japan. However, things get intimate between you and your partner and co-pilot, Jeon Jungkook, when he realizes Park Jimin, the famous idol from Korea, broads the plane and blatantly flirts with you. 

🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).

⭐Something Like Love by @iamtaekooked [8.4K] // jjk x f.reader // cop!au, police office!au // 🥰

📝 It was meant to be a regular day at the hospital. That is until you get kidnapped in broad daylight. Meanwhile, the famous detective Jeon Jeongguk who also happens to be your best friend, just wanted a normal day free of world’s bullshit, but he couldn’t even have that.

🗨️ I haven’t re-read this yet – but I remember I loved it 💜(I’ll insert my rec here when I have read it again).

⭐The Forgotten Spaces [completed series] by @oddinary4bts // jjk x reader // college!au, dancer!au + e2l // 🌩️🥵🥰

📝 you’ve been dancing on the same dance crew since your teenage years, and you finally have an important role in it. It feels like life is taunting you when your rival comes back after disappearing for a year, ready to tease you every chance he gets. Will the teasing turn into more, or are you going to take him down with you?

🗨️ This is truly a masterpiece! The writing is perfect and the characters have so much soul, dimension, hurt and love. It is exceptional 👏🏾♥️ you just have to read this gem 💎

⭐Two point Five (2.5): pt2 + pt3 [series] by @bratkook // jjk x f.reader // handyman!jk, s2f2l // 🥵🥰

📝 Who would have thought booking a handyman from an app would lead to this. sure, you wish he’d mount you instead of just your television, but you could totally be friends. Right?

🗨️ This is also one of my all time favorites! 💎There is just something incredibly hot about handyman JK 🥵 It is so good, juicy, smutty and there's comedy in it too! Please don’t be sleeping on this one.

Okay, okay, okay. So the list got out of hand! And I know I say “this is in my top 10” but I can’t even pick my top 10 because I have waaaay too many favorites 😂

I hope you have an awesome day, are happy and stay healthy! I’ll go and enjoy my birthday with a chill day, birthday dinner with my family, probably some reading and watching the finale of Loki  🥳 🎂 Thank you so much for liking, commenting or reblogging my rec lists, it means a lot to me – remember to reblog, comment and/or like the fics you like on the list to the the lovely authors know you love their stuff 💜

[brrrkdslek]

HYUNG'S SECRET! O.O

❒ psh x male! reader

❒ porn w plot

❒ dry humping, raw sex, mommy kink, kinda somnophilia, recording, pet names, nipple play, possessive hwa, belly-bulge, creampie

❒ you discover your seonghwa hyung's secret and one thing leads to another.

❒ 4.1k

you have a problem. so your current room was yours. since there are nine members, the staff decided to do a lucky draw to see which member would get a room all to themselves. and guess what? you got it of course.

sometimes the members would sneak in and cuddle you at night and you never minded. in fact, you loved cuddling with your members. they all held a soft spot for you as you were the youngest and last member to join.

but recently something weird was happening. you'd wake up most mornings covered in sweat, and your thighs and shorts would be covered in- what even is it? you didn't know.

you just think it's some weird shit you do when you sleep, but how wrong you were.

the members all had split schedules for the day. you would sometimes come across a few members and talk for a bit before moving on, but throughout the entire day you barely saw your seonghwa hyung.

you brushed it off as everyone's schedules were packed and busy, so you thought nothing of it.

seonghwa was the last to arrive back to the dorms. he sighed tiredly as he entered, placing down his things before making his way into the living room, where he found you cuddled up between yeosang and yunho, watching a movie.

seonghwa's blood boiled as he saw yeosang lay against your neck, and yunho's hand gripping your thighs gently. however you didn't seem to mind, instead you smiled more at the affection. which angered him even more.

seonghwa had always held this possessive behaviour towards you. he knew you way back during middle school. you were a few grades below him and always looked up to him, his heart would swell whenever you would run up to him yelling 'hyung!' and telling him all about your day.

not that he hated his members, he just hated how touchy they were with you. you were his, damn it. he knew you longer, been with you longer. heck, he was the one who brought you into kq in the first place.

seonghwa rolled his eyes as he went into his shared bedroom with hongjoong, unpacking his things.

he shouldn't be doing this. seonghwa knew how bad it was, how much trouble he'd get in. but he couldn't help himself.

he wrapped his arms around your waist, big spooning you as he rubbed his hard erection along your plump ass. he reached under your baggy tshirt, playing with your nipple as you let out a quiet whimper in your sleep.

he took a deep whiff when he buried his face against your nape, he moaned. god, you smelled heavenly. he almost came as he heard you let out a breathy moan.

you blink a few times, adjusting to the darkness as you felt something rub at your ass. you stayed silent as you blushed furiously. you bit the edge of your pillowcase as you held back moans.

you could feel yourself get harder. seonghwa leaned forward and nibbled at your ear, "oh fuck-! my darling n/n, hyung's sorry- ugh~ shit! fuck, i love you so damn much." seonghwa sucked at your neck, marking you as his.

he stopped and slid his cock between your thighs, squeezing him perfectly. "oh- n/n you were made for me, see how perfectly we fit with each other? fuckkk~ you feel so good, taking such good care of your hyung."

he thrusted messily as his tip rubbed against your leaking cock every now and then. both of his hands moved to fiddle with your chest, he pulled and twisted your nipples, massaging the flesh of your chest. you whimpered as he bit down on your neck once again.

there's no way seonghwa hyung would do this. there's no way, right? of course you recognise his voice, you knew it was him but you just just couldn't believe he would do something like this. you weren't disgusted at all, the opposite actually.

"fuck- n/n, mommy's gonna cum! cum with me, okay?" seonghwa put his hand into your shorts, stroking your hard cock gently. you bit your lip at the feeling of his callous fingers, you were so fucked. god, why did he have to call himself that? it made you feel all weird and shit.

"ugh~ you're mommy's boy, aren't you? you're mine. mine, mine, mine! fuck- you belong to me, and i belong to you. i- i'll do anything for you, baby," seonghwa kissed your neck lovingly as you feel your orgasm nearing at his possessive tone.

"i love you so much, n/n-! so please, love me too! mommy will take care of you and love you- ah! fuck, you feel so good..." seonghwa teared up, moaning beautifully before cumming all over your thighs.

you came into your short right after, tears sliding down your face. you felt so good, so needed, so loved.

you panted as your eyelids became heavy, just then seonghwa flipped you on your back as you stared back at him with half-lidded eyes. he smirked and kissed your forehead, "go to sleep, it's all a dream..." seonghwa covered your eyes, lulling you back to sleep.

you woke up clean for the first time in forever. bits and pieces of last night coming back to you as you became flustered.

you guys had a fan meeting to attend today. you were pumped and excited to see your lovely atinys, you jumped around with wooyoung as you neared the stage.

the meeting flew by so quickly. you met a lot of nice atinys that gifted you plushies, your favourite! you and the members began answering some questions from a mystery box filled by atinys.

"okay atinys, it's time for our maknae to pick his question!" san taunted as he handed you the box, you swayed your hand around it for a while before picking out a small slip of paper.

you opened it and read exactly as it said, "is seonghwa your mommy...?" the crowd roared and cheered as you stood, flustered. seonghwa smirked and wrapped his arms around your waist, face dangerously close to yours.

"aww, you're all flustered n/n~ do you like mommy that much?" the crowd along with a few members screeched at the sudden comment. your hands rested on his forearms as you stared at anywhere else but him, "uh- yeah of course i like you hyung, what are you talking about?" you laughed it off as you detached yourself from him.

seonghwa's heart fluttered even if it wasn't the 'like' he had wanted. he smiled widely and latched himself onto you again. the atinys awed and cooed at your adorable interaction.

you felt his hand slid under your cropped top, kneading at your waist. you bit your lip and squeezed your thighs together.

"n/n, i know your birthday is coming up soon. look what i got you!" a staff ran out to pass the giant kuromi plushie to him, before he passed it to you.

completely forgetting the past event, you squealed happily and threw yourself at him. catching you easily, seonghwa kissed your cheek. "thank you hyung! really, i can't believe it! it's so huge!" the plushie was almost as big as you.

the audience cooed at the interaction, atinys have always adored you, being the youngest and cutest member, you easily attracted lots of fans.

wooyoung whined, "yah! hyung, why do you only buy nice things for m/n? what about us?" "maybe if you behaved properly i would buy you something too." seonghwa said with a raised eyebrow.

you laid on your bed as you cuddled your very very large plushie. you buried your head into the fur, taking a deep whiff of its scent.

it smelled like... seonghwa? i mean, obviously. he bought it for you. weirdly enough, his scent overtook your senses. your sight became hazy as you sniffed more and more, hips moving instinctively.

"hyung..." you mumbled as you humped the plushie. you muffled your moans by biting into the ear or the plushie. memories of the night before flooded your brain, seonghwa's moans plagued your mind as it replayed on loop. it made you realise how hot and bothered he got you last night.

as you got more into it though, "ah~ m- mommy... oh-!" your toes curled as you shivered at the memory of his touch. his delicate fingers, pretty hands touched you so gently, with so much care, so much love.

you stopped and looked through the crack of your door, thanking the lord no one heard you. you got up and wobbled over to close the door, closing it gently then picking out seonghwa's hoodie from your closet, which he gave you and put it over your tshirt.

you squeezed your thighs together as his warm scent engulfed you. you laid on your bed again as you brought the hoodie up to your nose. you shut your eyes as you suffocated yourself in his florescent smell.

you whimpered as you caged the plushie between your legs, grinding on it. "mmh~ ah-! mommy, please- ouh~!" you pleaded pathetically at seonghwa no one in particular.

then, you heard a quiet giggle. you opened your eyes, face red with sweat as your hair stuck to your forehead. there seonghwa stood at your door, leaning on it. your eyes widen as you froze in embarrassment.

seonghwa walked in, closing the door and locking it as he made his way to sit at the edge of your bed. "so... i guess you like your present a lot, hm?" seonghwa smirked as he held your chin with his finger.

you blushed and swatted his hand away, "n-no! you're crazy anyways! how could you be doing such... lewd things to me when i sleep, hyung!" seonghwa smiled gently before crawling towards you, caging you between his arms.

seonghwa dipped his head next to your ear, whispering seductively. "you're so cute, my love. fuck, i want you so bad," you squirmed as you tried pushing him by his chest, only to have them pinned above your head.

seonghwa licked along the shell of your ear, squeezing a whimper out of you. "i know you want me too, baby. just say the word and i'm yours~" he smiled as you squeeze your legs closer to each other, trying to create more friction.

he slid his knee between your legs and rubbed circled against your crotch. you moaned loudly as you arched your back. taking the chance, he slid his tongue into your open mouth, sucking your tongue as drool trickled down your chin.

he let go of your wrists as you wrapped your arms around his neck, pulling him close. then, a knock sounded at your door. you pulled away with wide eyes as you and seonghwa held eye contact for a second, before the man smirked and dived down to kiss your neck.

everybody knew how sensitive your neck was, so it didn't help that he attacked at your sweet spots so eagerly. you let out a quiet moan, covering your mouth immediately.

"m/n, are you in there?" hongjoong asked as your doorknob shook,

"why's your door locked-? whatever, have you seen seonghwa hyung?"

"n-no..." you bit your lip as you stared down at seonghwa who moved his knee, you felt him smile into your neck as he teased you. you gripped his hair, hoping he's stop, but it just made him groan and whimper.

"you okay? you sound sick, do you need me to-"

"no! i mean- uh, no it's fine! i'm just feeling a bit t-tired..." you shivered as seonghwa's hand slide under his your hoodie, trailing up to your chest slowly.

"alright... then, sleep well!" as you heard the footsteps of hongjoong slowly diminish, you allowed yourself to relax into his touch.

"a-ah, not there!" you whined dumbly as seonghwa caught your lips again. kissing you with so much heat and passion, making your head spin.

his fingers flicked and toyed at your nipples, making you whimper into the kiss.

seonghwa pulled away, replacing his knee with his crotch as you rubbed against each other.

"baby- ugh, let me fuck you, please? mommy will fuck you full of his cum," he stare at you with half-lidded eyes, sliding his thumb into your mouth.

"tch, i don't know why you're always so touchy with the members. you're fucking mine, got that? i loved you way longer than they did, it's only fair that i should have you, right?"

he slid his finger further into your throat, making you gag a bit in the process. as he pulled out, a string of saliva connected at the tip of your tongue and his thumb. he smirked and licked his thumb clean seductively.

he grinded himself into you agonisingly slow. eyes begging you to just say the word,

to let him take you,

let him pleasure you,

let him love you.

which is what you did. you leaned into his ear and blushed furiously, "uhm, i want you... mommy, ah!" he suddenly bit down on your neck, nearly drawing blood.

"there, now you're all mine. now they'll know who you belong to, right baby?" he stroked the bite mark on your neck, internally hoping it'll last forever.

the male cooed as he watched tears well up in your eyes, softly stroking your cheek, kissing you sweetly. "awh, i'm sorry honey, did it hurt? mommy's sorry, let me make it up to you, hm?"

his hands slid under you as he pulled you up swiftly, switching your position with you now straddling him.

he laid down as he lazily pulled you up by your thighs. your crotch slowly inching towards his face. you leaned forward, putting your hands above his head to level yourself.

"what are you... doing?" you were almost afraid to ask as you internally sweat-dropped.

"i want you to sit on my face" he smiled, almost sweetly if it wasn't for such a lewd thing he just said.

you blushed furiously as you tried to get up, proving to be futile as seonghwa pulled you back in, capturing your lips in his.

"i promise i'll make ya' feel good? please? just once, baby... spoil your mommy please?" he jutted out his bottom lip, eyes begging you to approve.

you thought about it for a few seconds as seonghwa kneaded your ass, teasing your hole by brushing his fingers against it.

you shuddered before nodding. seonghwa helped you take off your boxers, your leaking cock bouncing as it freed. seonghwa smirked before landing a few small kisses on the tip, making you shiver.

you slowly moved yourself forward and closer to his face, "are... you sure about this?" you shot him a worried look as he just nodded frantically, begging you to suffocate him already.

"i just– ah!" he pulled you down onto his face as he kissed and sucked at your hole. his pants tightened more and more every second he smelled your strong musk, it was intoxicating.

you moaned and whimper as your toes curled at this new feeling. his tongue began prodding at your hole as he held you down by gripping on your thighs.

your vision became hazy as you gripped his hair, pulling his further into you. seonghwa moaned at that, sending vibrations into your core.

"oh... mommy! i- ah!" you could only mumble the word 'mommy' pathetically as you rode his face, not even able to form comprehensible sentences.

your thighs tightened against his head as your soft flesh sandwiched his face. seonghwa swore he would've came on the spot if you had squeezed him any harder.

you felt his hands shake as you pulled away from his face. seonghwa's face was red as he panted.

"oh my god! why didn't you tell me you couldn't breathe, i-" before you could finish your sentence, seonghwa pulled you back on his face, sliding his tongue into your hole.

"w-wait, ah~ mommy!" tears started filling your eyes as pleasure overtook your body. his tongue slide in and out of your hole, teasing you.

you looked back to the kuromi plushie and pulled it back into you. moaning as you buried yourself into seonghwa's scent, getting closer and closer.

with you gripping his head and sitting on his face, seonghwa knew he couldn't last any longer. you softly whimpered that you were close as seonghwa went ballistic.

hands groping you everywhere as he slurped and licked at you. your moans were music to seonghwa's ears as he felt himself getting close.

"mommy... 'm gunna cum—" just then, you came all over the kuromi plushie as you pulled at seonghwa's hair, triggering his own release.

slowly, you pulled yourself up as your thighs shook. seonghwa had slick covering his mouth and chin, lazy smile painted on his face as he stared at the ceiling, as if fucked out.

"mommy?" you softly poked his arm as he turned to look at you for a few seconds. fuck, how could you look so innocent even in this scenario?

he crashed his lips into yours, as you tasted yourself on his tongue. you moaned into the kiss as you sat on his lap again, grinding yourself on him.

you looked towards your clock as it read '2:00am'. you made a mental note to not be too loud as you'll disturb the deep slumber of your members.

seonghwa gripped your thigh as he flipped your position, never leaving your lips. "are you finally gonna let mommy fuck you?" he mumbled between your lips as you nodded your head, pulling him so his body was flush against yours.

your hard cock grinded against his, the only thing separating the two were his shorts as he wriggled out of them, stroking your cocks together.

seonghwa went down and licked your nipple, suckling it in his mouth. you shut your eyes, throwing your head back as you tangled your hands into his hair.

he used his free hand to play with your other nipple, twisting and pulling at it. you covered your mouth as you moaned whorishly, never in the world did you think your seonghwa hyung would ever have you in such a position.

even if you did have a big fat crush on him during middle school, you never expected him to eat you out and probably fuck you dumb later. you turned your head to look at the picture on your nightstand.

it was your graduation and seonghwa had surprised you by coming with flowers and chocolates. you remembered how shy you felt as if he were your valentines. you still remember how you squirmed when he pulled you in by your waist for a picture, kissing your cheek.

seonghwa pulled away, looking towards the direction you were looking at. he smiled at the sight of only his picture on your headstand, "'ya know, i actually liked you back then." you turn to him with wide eyes,

"what? no way, i did too!"

he smiled apologetically, "i should've made you mine back then, huh?" you blushed and pouted, "well, you can still make it up to me~" you laid down with your hands above your head, flashing him a flirty wink.

"fuck- i can't do this anymore, i have to be inside you." seonghwa spat into his hand, stroking his hard cock before lining it up to your hole. you gripped the bedsheets above you as you gulped nervously.

he entered slowly at first, holding you in his arms and checking on you as he didn't want to hurt you. you moaned out at the feeling, you felt so full already.

he kissed you sweetly as he entered more and more. seonghwa had to hold himself back from fucking your brains out right then, the way your walls clenched around him, how warm you are, everything was driving him insane.

he felt you relax as he slid his entire length in in one go. your body jolted as your eyes rolled to the back of your head, he was... gigantic.

seonghwa waited until you told him to move. he slowly dragged his cock out, making you whimper. then, he snapped his hips back in. "AH! fuck..." you looked down to see a bulge at your belly as you closed your eyes and threw your head back into the pillows.

"heh, you looks so cute like this my love." he began fucking you quickly, almost dizzying. seonghwa pulled his phone out of his shorts pocket, putting his phone eye-level as he recorded you.

"c'mon baby, tell mommy how much you love his big cock, hm~?" he gripped your waist with his free hand, fucking you into him.

"puah~ mommy, i love your- ah! 's big..." you moaned whorishly before opening your eyes, you turned your head to the side, burying it in the pillows. "noooo, mommy don't film me please..."

seonghwa tsked as he gripped your jaw, turning your head towards the camera. "c'mon love, tell me. tell me how much you love it, how much you love me. unless, you like your other hyungs more than me?"

he sped up as you cried, cradling his hand at your cheek. "no- no way! i- ah~ i only wan'chu, mommy... not them, only- mmh! only you...!" you look up at him past his phone as fat tears streamed down your face.

you'd always craved seonghwa's affection since you first knew him, he was the perfect man in your eyes. you were attached to his hip like a puppy during your middle school years.

he was only ever gentle and loving to you. the mean glares he sent to other students were nothing compared to the large sparkling eyes that watched your every move.

of course, you two shared a whole lot of sexual tension. such as 'accidentally' making out with each other during a project at your house one time, but you both pushed it behind.

you always told yourself you only needed him, which he did you too. not that you didn't love the other members, just that your love towards them couldn't compare to yours for him, your hyung.

seonghwa cooed as he rubbed the tears from your cheek, "awe, my love. did'ja think i was giving you away or something? mommy's only teasing~ i would never do that to you, babyboy."

you blushed and smiled sweetly before he put down his phone, hands at your hips as he thrusted speedily. you felt yourself getting closer and closer with each look you shared.

you wrapped your arms around his neck, forcing your eyes open as you spoke, "mommy- ouh! i- i actually enjoyed it when we made out that time during middle school. i was jus- just scared you, ah! scared you wouldn't like me back..."

you shut your eyes, dizzied by the mix pleasure and pain. seonghwa's heart clenched, "my love... if i'm being honest," he leaned down near your ear, licking the shell.

"i actually thought about fucking you after that. every time i'd see you, i imagine folding you on the desk and fucking you in front of all the students. it would've been fun, huh?"

your stomach flipped as you only whimpered in response. it would've been heaven... just imagine, everyday after school he'd fuck you in your seat, in your classroom, where anybody could just walk in. you moaned as you felt a knot in your stomach.

"mmh, mommy, just a bit- faster please..." you nibbled at his neck as he pounded you, lewd sounds of skin slapping and bed creaking arousing the two.

"the bed might break if you go any faster..." you giggled into his neck as he let out a breathy laugh.

"doesn't matter. i need to show my baby how much i love him, how much i've needed him, how much i've wanted him." he rubbed your waist in small circles as you shivered.

"i'm gonna- mommy!"

"ugh! me too, love."

he thrusted messily before cumming inside you, triggering your own release. your back arched as your eyes rolled back, seeing stars. you moaned loudly as he filled you up the brim, hot cum burning your insides.

you let out a quiet moan as he pulled out, kissing you lovingly. slow and sensual, making you sleepy.

you pulled him towards you, tangling your legs together as you whispered a soft, "g'night..." before drifting off to sleep.

seonghwa smiled, kissing your head as he picked up his phone. he watched the recorded video, already getting hard again. he smiled as he went onto his messages.

he scanned the contacts of his members, who should he send this video to?

©BRRRKDSLEK 2023

[jayladfanpage]

OPENED the first page of Robin lives #3 and just EXPERIENCED EMOTIONAL DAMAGE

fuCK. LIKE. GENUINELY. FUCK. going to consume raw bismuth rn im sobbubg I had hopes after they showed Shelia and just F U C KKKKKKKKKKK

I think writers forget so much of what made adtif adtif and what made Robin Jason Robin Jason. that boy was willing to give up Robin at that point for just a loving family? The issues that led to adtif? WHAT ABOUT HIS whole struggle and issues with being robin itself? what are we even doing here. Nothing is addressed. Instead we get fucking revenge story after revenge story I'm going to implode die. now I feel stupid about waiting for it. I'm half incomprehensible about most of the things I HATED. DICK. What is he saying. God.

I miss u robin Jason, he was so much... a singular character... barr's run... starlin too to a degree... UGH. HIS CHARACTER THESIS IS LOVE ??? ON GOD I will consume 2 tons of pipebombs today fucking hell on god he barely gets dialog, he barely gets shit, I liked 1 panel and that s it im

Anyhow :D yippie ! Happy to see that you're here for fanon writers and all ! Super cool of you ! And your posts are vvv cool, much love ! Would love to hear your thoughts on Robin lives#3 :) <3

Anon you are so incredibly fucking real for this

Issue #3 is... such a fucking disappointment. Exactly like you said, already the first page makes my blood fucking BOIL.

There's a fundamental misunderstanding, in this issue, of where Red Hood!Jason's ideas of revenge come from. His obsession with Joker's death specifically isn't actually out of a need to have Joker dead, it's a need to prove to himself that Bruce loves him more than he loves his mission. Which is not true for Jason or any of Bruce's other children. Gotham will always come first.

So to have Jason go after Joker with the intent to kill him (and succeed at it!) is spitting in the face of all the complicated, messy familial ties that are at the core of UTRH, for the sake of some sense that Jason was always doomed to be the way he is as an adult.

Jason also doesn't feel good after killing people. He doesn't derive any pleasure from it. He's not disgusted by or ashamed of the things he's done, far from it, but to him the murders are just a means to an end. A task to complete if he wants to save Gotham in the way that Bruce isn't able to. Murdering people sure as fuck isn't the "best thing" to ever happen to him. What the fuck.

I also really hate this page. As much as I don't expect any teenager to fully "deal" with their trauma, because they're a teenager, Jason certainly wouldn't run from it. Jason is perhaps the most openly emotional Bat character, and that's always been one of his most important personality traits. He talks about his pain and his trauma, constantly and endlessly, because Jason benefits from communicating his emotions, even if he does it aggressively or explosively.

Plus, "paralyzed with fear" ?? Jason's fear response is FIGHT not freeze. It's never been freeze. Every time Jason is scared, as Robin or otherwise, he responds by picking a fight. He flings himself head-on to the thing that's making him afraid because god fucking damn it Jason has always been good at saving himself -- which is why he's so desperate to have Bruce kill Joker, so that somebody else will protect him for a change.

This plot I'm conflicted on. I've always hated Timmy Todd and always thought that Jason should have been Joker Junior instead. However, this was not the comic to do it in. Robin Lives should have been a comic about trauma and vulnerability and healing. Main Continuity already gives us the neverending loop of Jason's trauma, of how it keeps constantly getting worse and worse, and I wanted Robin Lives to have been different. I wanted it to grab me by the shoulders and say He could have been fine. Jason could have healed. If only things had been different, Jason Todd could have been good.

But it didn't. It's just another fucking Cheer storyline where we read about a child being "doomed from the beginning" and shifting the blame of Red Hood onto Jason for being a lost cause instead of acknowledging the greater context of Jason's death and revival and it's just. Ugh. It fucking sucks.

Also, Bruce would never say this about saving like a dozen children. "Bigger fish to fry" WHILE HE IS RESCUING BRAINWASHED CHILDREN? where is my Bruce Wayne and what did you do to him

About the fanon writers -- thank you! I always find the hate for them a little misplaced. There are dozens of canons across hundreds of comics and fanfiction as a medium is supposed to have a certain degree of separation from its source. I think a lot less people would be upset over "fanon" batfam fics if the writers understood better core traits of the characters. Fanfiction isn't about "Would [x] do this" it's about "How would [x] do this" and a lot of non-writers don't understand that and just think fanon is always horrible.

[ilovewomenfr]

just a pissed off rant about straight women calling themselves pillow princesses🥰

i saw like three tiktoks of straight girls calling themselves pillow princesses today and oh my god it boils my blood. i open the comments and there’s always such a huge fight going on; the sapphics are like hey this is actually a lesbian term you genuinely cannot be a pillow princess if you’re with a man and then the straight girls are like it’s seriously not that deep its just a term. oh my fucking god i hate it so much.

BABE YOU CANT BE A FUCKING PILLOW PRINCESS WHEN YOUR PARTNER IS ALSO RECEIVING STIMULATION AT THE SAME TIME! it drives me absolutely insane that they can’t let us have anything. like why tf are you wearing a goddamn carabiner because you think its trendy and get mad when a girl thinks youre a lesbian! all these girls dressing masc bc its trendy… dress how you want but dont start making fun of butches and mascs when the trend is over. LET LESBIANS HAVE THINGS!#mycultureisnotyourcostume type shit.

im actually gonna get violent this stuff pisses me off so much UGH. AND they use it because they think it just means you dont do any work and just lie there lazily… massive eye roll. why do straight people minimize the fucking history behind queer terms, you hate us but you copy everything we do? and i know for a fact half these girls hate lesbians in general.

sort of unrelated; lesbians having a preference for dating other lesbians BECAUSE of their shared experience of the isolation of being a lesbian in a heteronormative society is in no way biphobic. i think in my experience being a femme it is so isolating growing up and having alot of friends having their femininity revolving around men. like i wouldnt change my sexuality for the world but goddamn its so frustrating when it seems like almost every aspect of queerness gets stolen by straight people.

one more thing that pisses me off (also unrelated) is when straight girls call their friends girlfriends… no. dont call your friends your girlfriends when im paranoid of being hate crimed every time i hold my girlfriend’s hand in public.

and yes i did format this because the whole clump was hard on my eyes

[darkficsyouneveraskedfor]

Lost Together II

Sequel to Forbidden Lessons

Warnings: possible dark elements such as noncon, age gap, abuse of power, coercion, mentions of suicide, depression, pregnancy and abortion, violence. Y'all know I do it dark and spicy. You have warnings, use them.

Note: I never really intended for Thor to get his own little thing but here we are.

Thots, comments, screaming, and feedback are welcome and highly encouraged. Thank you. Thanks all for following along.

As promised, you have a bed to lay your head. A room to call your own. For now. You're not yet convinced this will be forever. Loki needed to hide you and do it quick. You would hate to overstay your welcome. Especially once there's a squalling baby attached to you.

You don't have much. Thor found some clothes for you, freshly washed along with the bedding. Some loose cardigans, a few oversized dresses and some wool stockings. He apologised profusely that it was all he could get for you. You assured him it was fine but he was less than content with your affirmation. You're flattered by his concern.

You settle in, exhausted but without reason. You didn't do much aside from read an old book about a woman on an ocean liner, travelling to a new life. Every time you tried to help, Thor firmly but gently ordered you to stop. You'd hate to disrespect his home so you obeyed.

Little by little, the displacement fades away and you doze off. You sink into a deep sleep, on your back, snoring loud enough to hear in your dreams. For once, you make it through the night without waking up, but when you do, you hear a sonorous rumbling from the hall.

It takes a moment to remember where you are. You stare at the blank ceiling and let your eyes travel down the wallpaper. You roll onto your side and sit up with a groan, folding back the flannel sheet and thick quilt. You rub your shoulders and stretch out your neck as you stand. Ugh, you feel gross.

You rub your stomach as it boils. It isn't going to settle. You put a cardigan over your borrow nightgown and twist back the creaky oval handle of the door. You step out into the hall, the floorboards cold against your soles.

You turn towards the bathroom and as you make your way down, the low deep mutter comes clearer. You slow down even as the constricting in your stomach gets more urgent.

The door is slightly ajar. You can see Thor's shadow moving on the other side. There's another bathroom on the first floor, you might-- nope, you can't make it.

You knock on the door, more frantic than you mean to as you clap a hand over your mouth.

"Huh!" Thor grunts and the door swings open. He holds a wide brush with a furrow in his forehead as he faces you. You wave your free hand as you desperately clamp your other palm against your lips.

He moves and ushers you in with his arm. You don't think of how cramped it is as you race past him and flip up the toilet lid. You drop to your knees and hug the bowl, wrenching without restraint as your insides spasm.

"Oh, mouse," Thor grumbles over you. You wince as his large hand touches your back and he bend over you, "get it all out."

You have no choice. You heave until you're empty then hang heavily over the contents of your stomach. You reach up shakily and flush. Breathless, you accept a washcloth from Thor and wipe your mouth.

"I should've warned you. Any blood of my brother will cause trouble," Thor jokes as he gently squeezes your shoulder, "here."

He offers his hand and helps you to your feet. He cranks the four-pronged faucet and lets the water flow. You rinse your face then your mouth, before reaching for your tooth brush. He hovers behind you, his hands clutched over his large stomach as he watches you in the mirror. You spit out the toothpaste and look at him.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to interrupt," you saw as you wash the bristles.

"Not at all, I was only..." he raises a hand to rub his neck, "I... was trying to deal with this... rat's nest."

He lowers his eyes and you see how his cheeks turn rosy. You look at the counter and see the broken comb and the brush he held before. You glance at him again and notice a few shakes smoothed out.

"Oh, uh, did you... did you have any conditioner? Or coconut oil?" You ask as you face him. "It will help with the tangles."

He pets his beard meekly and stares at the floor, "I didn't think of it..."

"Can I... Can I help? It might be easier than doing it yourself."

He blinks and peeks up at you, head still tilted down, "you would do that?"

"Sure. Why not? I'm kind of an expert. My barbie's used to get all matted," you shrug.

"Hm, I suppose I wouldn't be able to get the back... my next option was the razor," he says grimly.

"Oh, no, we can handle this," you grab the brush, "so... let me see if I can find anything to make this easier..."

"I shall find a chair," he suggests."

You look around the bathroom but only find shampoo and soap. Not of much help. You hear Thor approach from down the hall and he enters with a wooden chair and a jar. Hr presents the latter to you as he plants the former on the tile.

"Oil," he announces proudly, "might be a bit old..."

"That'll do," you smile and twist off the cap.

He lowers himself onto the chair, his shoulders straight and set. You near as scoop out a little oil with your fingertips. You take a lock of hair and grease it up, putting the brush to the tails of it as you start to work out the knots.

"It's easier if you start at the end," you explain, "then you don't make new knots."

"Oh," he utters. "You know, you don't have to..."

"Please, it keeps my mind off of how crummy I feel," you say, "and really I don't mind."

"Mmm, I shouldn't have let it get so bad."

"Nothing that can't be fixed," you use your fingers to loosen some matting, working closer to the scalp.

"I suppose..." he murmurs and you notice his shoulders relax just a little.

"You have beautiful hair," you say, "it's a nice colour. Thick. Not like Loki's."

He snorts. You let yourself laugh as you continue on your task. He shifts but doesn't pull away.

"He's adopted, you know?" Thor says, "if you can't guess."

"Ah, well, that's... interesting," you comment; that might explain a few things. "I don't have any siblings."

"They are both good company and the worst," he chuckles, "how's it looking, mouse?"

"Not so bad," you move on to a new section, "but you might smell like coconut for a while."

[2laffy2]

Laffy's opinion and relationship with the other members?? :>

●How they see Laffy

Trickster: Best friend [ @boiling-potato ]

"Oh? My bestie?,yeah she's very interesting. i love brushing her wings they are soooo soft and when ever she has time she gives me a lot of sweets from her universe, they are amazing XP"

Casimir: Hate/Neutral

"Laffy? I'm sorry but i don't think i have heard of this name before. Tho for some reason I'm having this sense of dejavu in this period everytime a new guest enters"

Rosemary: Neutral

"I'm sorry but I never heard some named like that entering the mansion"

Heaven: Scared/Neutral

"She is really scary when she's angry, if you ever encounter her NEVER touch the- wait- why am i even warning you? Eheh"

Nevaeh: Scared/Romance (crush like Romance)

"She is very cute when she's angry that face that she make, omg"

Hayden: Neutral

"... Who?"

Penelope: Best friend

"Big sis? She very cool she let me cut her in many pieces. But for some reason when I'm talking about her to some members of the family they don't seem know who I'm talking about even tho she's been here a lot of times. Its like they just del- uh? What was i talking about?"

Chaoxiang: Dislike

"Her? Ugh i don't know how someone like her managed to beat me in her first time playing *inserit game* even tho she's have no idea what videogames are"

Willow: Best friend

"She is one of the few guests that i manager to help, but i don't understand why she keep coming back in the mansion and no one remembers her. She's very kind but a lil strange"

Elijah: Hate [ @gachaclubideas ]

"Uh? That name, for some reason it get on my nerves"

Talissa: Neutral

"For some reason after hearing that name i want to laugh at my brother"

Juliet: Like

"She protect me from Elijah when he is being a little to much and I'm very thankful to her. Her appearance keep changing but i can tell who she's everytime"

Tsutsuji: Best friend [ @n0vatsu ]

"She very gentle and help me with my nightmare when i can't sleep. I just don't like when she talk to that monster"

Yoake: Neutral/Scared

"... she doesn't hate me even after i killed her, she just waved to me the next day as it never happened, she's too kind"

Sylas: Like/Romance [ @justafriendlystranger ]

"Oh Laffy? She's a very interesting specie man er woman, how much I would love to experiment on her, the faces of pains that she would make~ *sigh*. With that little power of hers i would be like the rest, thx me that i write down everything."

Caleb: Dislike/Hate

"That name... its infected"

Trevor: Best friend [ @edgywithaheart ]

"She Funny, i like her personality. As any other vampire i can sense her"

●How Laffy see them

Trickster: Best friend

"She amazing, she the one that helped me when i was teleported in this realm after being burned on a stick. I Love when she brush my wings <3"

Casimir: Like/Neutral

"Its really funny seeing him confused and annoyed every time i enter or stay in the mansion ihihi"

Rosemary: Like

"She a really gentle mother figure, when she doesn't try to kill you. Very pretty"

Heaven: Like/Neutral

"Uh, she's fine i suppose"

Nevaeh: Hate

" i don't want to talk about her after what she did"

Hayden: Like/Neutral

"He is very quiet, so I stay away from him so i don't disturb him with my presence"

Penelope: Best friend

"She such a cutie even when she try to kill you <3. I love having tea party's with her and Trickster"

Chaoxiang: Like

"I like listening to him explain how stupid i am for not knowing what videogames are. he is really funny seeing getting worked up for losing"

Willow: Best friend

"Cutie potato <3 nothing to say more, i just wanna pat her head"

Elijah: Dislike

"consent is the key my friend >:/"

Talissa: Like

"Her soul is so tormented, so I always try to calm her when she is having nightmares, i also do that to her brother even to i don't like him much"

Juliet: Like

" I like spending time with her. She is very elegant. I sometimes give her my blood since i can live even without it"

Tsutsuji: Best friend

"I spend a lot of time with her. I help her with my powers when she cant sleep"

Yoake: Like

"Her face when she saw me the next day after she killed me was hilarious. I feel bad for her tho, so i try to spend time with her if she let me"

Sylas: Like/Hate

"I swear I will kill this man if he keep bothering me with questions. Its so annoying that he is cute. One time i found him snoping around in Penelope room trying to get one of my arms that she kept after cutting me for the first time ugh"

Caleb: Neutral

"He kinda hate me for some reason but i don't mind"

Trevor: Best friend

"He is a cool vampire, i like him :3"

[beanghostprincess]

Oh my god man just read your childhood sanuso au and I gotta say, it's such a nice read. One of my favorite tropes are childhood best friends who lost each other then reunite it's so beautiful.

And when you wrote how Nami said Usopp talks about him, ugh literal heart eyes

I have this hc where before Sanji, Usopp and Nami would be the one taking care of the kitchen and food so I can just imagine Usopp yapping about his old best friend to Nami while they're preparing dinner together and she's just nodding along not believing him in the slightest but still happy to listen

Like they'd be chopping vegetables for some simple stew and Usopp would open his mouth, "you know Nami, I actually met one of the best cooks in all of east blue when I was little, dare I say he was the best in all the seas" and he starts to ramble as Nami just goes "oh yeah? Mhmm" to him 😭😭

Love your little fic thing man it's such a treat

It's one of my favorite tropes too!!! I think they totally have the energy to be childhood BFFs. It fits them so damn much!

Nami would not believe a word Usopp says. Not her. Not anybody. Because, okay, saying "I used to have a cook best friend" isn't really that unbelievable. But the way Usopp talks about Sanji is so dramatic and poetic that they genuinely don't believe a word he's saying because it sounds too fantastic and too good to be true. Luffy won't stop mentioning they need a cook, and Usopp acts the same way every time and starts telling all the stories and little adventures they had (by 'little adventures' meaning 'we once sneaked into Kaya's home and baked cookies with her in the middle of the night and one of her caretakers was really angry but instantly gave up when he tasted the cookies because Sanji's food was just too good'. Which sounds like a real thing that happened. Because it happened. But they don't believe a word he's saying anyway because of the way he talks about him it's... Too romantic and imaginary to be true). Zoro and Nami don't believe that he had a friend like that (because he genuinely speaks about Sanji like a fucking God of food) and Luffy won't stop saying things like "If you know a cook you should've said it sooner!! Where is he now???!! Perhaps he joins us!!" but it's a very sensitive topic for Usopp and he refuses to tell them the truth, so he just smiles bitterly and says "We had to go separate ways I- I don't know where he is but!! But he wouldn't join us, anyway! He'd stay loyal to his captain! (referring to himself)". This is kind of why Nami and Zoro don't believe him either, y'know? The way he talks about being someone else's captain like it's a real thing.

Usopp wants to find Sanji again, he really does. But he also doesn't want to because it's embarrassing for him to find Sanji again and tell him he's the sniper of another pirate crew instead of having one of his own. The thought of Sanji joining them is great and he's dying to meet him again, but just thinking about Sanji being somebody else's cook makes his blood boil with envy. Even if it's Luffy. He loves Luffy. He knows he'll be the king of the pirates, and there's no doubt about that. But damn... He can't help but wish, just a little bit inside, behind all the jokes he makes about being a captain, that he was still Sanji's captain.

Then they meet again and none of them can believe that Sanji is actually real. And he actually calls Usopp captain??? And it's- It's just too much, man. Luffy gets a bit defensive over his title and says that no, HE is the captain and not Usopp. And Sanji is a bit confused at first and shame takes over Usopp because: "So- So you are not the captain, then?"

Usopp: Well, It's- It's a vague thing, right, Luffy? It's a shared- Luffy: It's not a shared thing, I am the captain. Zoro's the first mate. Nami is our navigator- Nami: I am not your anything. We're just working together! Luffy: And you are our sniper!!! Sanji: You're the sniper, then? Not the captain? Usopp: .... I really tried to- Sanji: It's fine. Don't worry. I'm sure your gorgeous navigator right here is starving. What do you all want to eat?

It's a bit uncomfortable. Really. Everything's the same as in the original story except that now you need to add a scene of Usopp explaining what really happened to the crew when Sanji goes away, and Luffy going "You might not be the captain but he could still be your cook!! I want him with us!!" and Usopp keeps saying that he doesn't need to do anything for him. Luffy actually says he's not. He just likes Sanji's food. Sanji refuses to go with them, yadda yadda yadda. And Usopp goes to talk to him because, despite being ashamed, he really, really wants Sanji back in his life. It kind of goes like this (I don't do narration today guys I just woke up and I maybe write a fic so y'all will have to wait):

Usopp: So... You're not coming with us? Sanji: .... I have stuff to do here. I can't just leave. Usopp: But you're not happy here- Sanji: How do you know that? Usopp: Because I know you! Sanji: We've been what?! Nine years without seeing each other?? You don't- Usopp: So you're going to find the All Blue trapped in here? That's what you're saying? Sanji: It's not- Usopp: Sanji, you can't just throw away your dream- Sanji: Throw away my dream like you did?! What happened to Captain Usopp, huh?! What's the point of finding the All Blue if you're not my captain?! What's the point of only one of us achieving our dreams?! Usopp: ... I'm sorry. I really tried to, I just- Maybe dreams change? Maybe I'm just meant to be a sniper! An adventurer. Like my father is. That's enough for me. If you accept Luffy's offer then we will be together and- Sanji: And you won't be my captain. I don't think I can- Shit, Usopp, I waited for you. For so long. Usopp: I might not be your captain anymore, but you're still my cook! You will forever be my cook and- If I go away and I don't bring you here with me I will forever regret it. Not going with you was the biggest mistake of my life, please. Sanji: ... I'm kind of glad you didn't. I nearly died the week after I left Syrup Village. Usopp: ??? What???! Sanji: Long story short, bad weather, Zeff's crew attacked us, ship sunk, got stuck in a huge-ass rock without food, Zeff saved me, uh- Yeah. Long story. At least you were safe, so- Usopp: I could've been with you. Sanji: Or you could've died. Hey, just- Let me do my own thing, okay? It was nice seeing you again... Captain.

You know the drill, Sanji has his talk about the All Blue with Luffy. Everything is kind of the same? The soup thing. Zeff fights with Sanji. Zeff tells Luffy to take him with him. Etc, etc, etc. You just need to have in mind the 'Usopp factor' and that Sanji needs to learn to see Luffy as his captain (not hard, because it's Luffy) and learn to see that Usopp's dream wasn't being a captain, but to be more than what people thought he was. And with this crew and Luffy he'll be able to do so. So Sanji happily joins them and he sees Usopp as the best adventurer and bravest pirate already. Like, in his eyes, getting to know Usopp again is the most exciting thing in the world + having a new captain he trusts with his life + getting to achieve his dream.

I don't want to use this post for more because I think I'm getting too carried away, but... You know. Everything is extremely sweet. They have the same canon dynamic but Usopp really, really tries to act braver and show off more in front of Sanji. He wants to live up to his expectations. But then he gets scared easily and Sanji doesn't mind at all because he knows how his best friend is, it's alright. He'll protect him. He'll do what he can't. On the other hand, Sanji is- He's the happiest he's ever been. He's sometimes so done with Usopp's shenanigans, but I think he's extremely clingy with him. They're not dating but they're... It's so obvious. The closet is glass and Sanji's hatred for men and internalized homophobia does not exist when it comes to Usopp. I mean, a bit of internalized homophobia is always there, but at least he doesn't try to be the straightest man alive when he's with Usopp. They feel like kids again when they're together and they have,,, So much fun. They sleep cuddling together because Sanji has missed him so much and likes having Usopp close. Usopp stays with him every time Sanji cooks. Nobody gets the inside jokes they make in front of everybody. Sanji is way more vocal about his feelings for him and keeps referring to Usopp as his best friend to anybody who asks. Usopp tells stories that are definitely not true to Sanji but Sanji nods and accepts them happily anyway. Usopp tells him about how Kaya had a crush on him, and Sanji is extremely confused because he's like "No?? She told me she had a crush on you?" and Nami is behind them like "You two are fucking idiots. She wants both of you. Now deal with it without fighting on deck, please." And they- They don't really know what to do with that information, so they send her a letter asking (and panicking about it) and she responds with another one, saying that Nami is right and if it's not too impertinent and selfish she'd like to wait and see both of them to tell them how she feels face to face. Until then, she'll wait for them. Usopp and Sanji don't really, uh, talk about it. Basically, they're the clingiest thing ever and everyone knows what's going on between them except them.

I have thoughts about how Water 7 would play out with these two, but I don't know if you're enjoying it enough for me to write the biggest post about it??? Idk. Let me know. I feel like I'm making this post too long. I am sorry-

[hel-phoenyx]

Kaizarz belongs to @corneille-but-not-the-author, Oli to @thal-ent and Domhildr to @soupedepates

Meili (mentioned) belongs to @azeler

There aren't many people that can make the bear gets out of its cave. In fact, it's limited to one. One, since the event ; the one that bears the crown.

Heh. Making an unintentional pun in my head probably is proof that I drank too much.

It's the night. Oli and Domhildr decided to relieve the king of his royal duties for the evening. I guess the reasoning would be that for once, he would be our friend, and not the Kraken king, hero of the tournament, and, even if I may be the only one here that knows that, future killer of the Tyrant. I appreciate there's still people that care that much.

However, deciding to string me along was a very poor move.

I'm tired. i'm annoyed. I'm pissed. By Gods I don't wanna be here. I may have wanted to, or Kaizarz convinced be gods know how, but right now I just wanna go back to my books and my alone time.

Why am I so irritated, some might ask ?

Guess whose idiots started a truth or dare while severely intoxicated. AGAIN.

And of course no one let me run away. Because it's not funny to play with only three people. So I'm sitting here, choosing dare after dare after dare and drinking my penalty for more than two thirds of them.

So I'm probably very drunk, I can't activate that damn spell because I can stay focused for five secs, and I have to look at those three idiots laughing at my expense and calling me a coward.

Well, to be fair, Domhildr is the only one to do so. But that's Domi, so she's noisier than five people combined.

Worse is that they're fucking audacious with their dares. Like, right now. Domhildr just dared Oli to do a strip-tease, and of course Oli did, though they stopped at the top. Luckily for everyone's cheeks. Kaizarz is avoiding that part of the room since Oli's shirt flew away on the middle of our circle.

I'm not looking either.

But now it's my turn, and Oli turns towards me with a big smile on their face.

"Tyr, truth or dare ?"

I roll my eyes.

"How about neither."

"No fun. Com'on, Tyr," adds Domhildr. "Don't be a bitch."

Ugh. Either I be a bitch and run away right now, but Kaizarz who is looking at me with big doe eyes is gonna get sad and I don't want that, or I subject myself to another humiliation with a potential bonus drink.

Choice is quick to be taken.

"Fine. Dare."

I hate how weak I am.

Kaizarz's face tints itself with a hint of worry, probably noticing that I reached my limit. Yet, he doesn't say anything, and Oli is the first one to answer, their big smile still on their face.

"Dare huh ? Then kiss Domi."

"Huh ?"

"On the mouth."

"Huh ?"

"For at least five seconds."

"HUH ?"

Are they fucking serious right now- yeah. Yeah they are. They're laughing like a little gremlins, their smile even wider than before. I doubt they think I would do that, it's probably a ploy to make me drink and loosen up, it's not gonna have the desired effect.

Kaizarz has a little frown.

"Hey maybe we shouldn't go that far-"

"Oh com'on, Kaizarz, don't be a galiant knight, Tyr knows how to defend himself !" Shouts Domhildr, now up on her feet. "And we all know anyway he won't do it !"

She turns towards me and stick her tongue.

"Right, mister I chicken out every time ?"

"With how daring you get ? Of course I "chicken out"."

Domhildr smiles even more. That little shit is getting on my nerves.

"Well, you get the same thing than Oli and I, even Kaizarz drank less than you ! I say it's not because we're daring, more like you're a coward~"

She's really getting on my nerves. Gods I miss Meili. He would be able to put some sense in her bonehead. And for the love of Harkyr stop smiling, it's making my blood boil !

Why are you taling so much pleasure in my annoyance ?!

"So Tyr, what will it be ? Beer or serpent's liquor ? Or you just step out of your comfort zone for once, you prude-"

"Fine !"

That was too much. I saw an echo in her voice, her words, and not the type I enjoy. Plus, I had my fair share of her vicious mockery. So if I have to put my lips on her to shut her up, so be it.

She looks dumbfounded, like she didn't expect that. All time for me to catch her by the shirt, pull her toward me and mark a pause before joining our lips together.

I hear a little sound of surprise probably coming from Kaizarz, but the countdown started by Oli covers it, sung on an enthousiastic voice. They're drunk, I can hear it in the little slurring, and the absurdity of the situation is enough to break their composure.

Five.

Domhildr feels surprised at first, but I only need less than a second to feel she's letting loose. Her face is too close, her eyes too wide. I close mine.

Four.

I'm still holding her shirt. I don't let go, but my grip gets weaker. I don't need to keep her in place, anyway. Rather to stop her from snuggling up to me.

Three.

She answers the kiss with an audace I suspect is for pushing me to my last limits. She's still standing, I'm sat, so even with our tremendous height difference I have to keep my head raised, and I feel a hand on my shoulder.

Two.

It's getting hot in here. Alcohol, probably. I don't deepen anything, but I can still feel her booze breath. We're both wasted at that point. It doesn't bother me the slightest. I have kissed drunker people. Somehow it adds to the appeal, probably because I am, myself, drunk.

One.

Her second hand is on my cheek. It's soft. It's warm. Her lips are softer. She's a good kisser. I guess she's used to it. Not judging. I'm no better.

Zero.

I let go a second too late.

They all look flabbergasted, everyone. Kaizarz, looking at me with a very weird expression, Oli, still smiling despite the surprise, and Domhildr, eyes wide, cheeks rozy, blinking once, twice, thrice.

She opens her mouth. Close it. I can't restrain a slight, victorious smile.

"So who's the coward now ?"

"........ Okay," Oli ends up answering. "I won't say anything, anymore."

"Good bird."

Yeah, I'm pissed. And maybe Domhildr's dumbfounded face is making me vicariously happy.

She runs her thumb on her lips.

"Wow. Didn't think you would do it."

"What, after getting on my nerves all evening ?"

"Yeah but. Did I get your first kiss or what ?"

She winks, Kaizarz blinks, eyes squinted. I just sigh.

"Absolutely not, as much as you wanted to."

I still remember their lips on mine.

Domhildr laughs.

"Oh, if only you chose truth, I would ask who was your first !"

"And it's exactly the reason I don't. Alright, either we keep this game moving or we do something else, because I am not saying anything about either my love or sex life, you motherfuckers."

"You have a sex life ?!"

"I said, not saying anything. Gods."

That's not details I wanna share anyways, godsdamnit. Luckily for me, they don't insist, and Kaizarz probably himself at his limit pulls out a game of cards. Oh, se we're doing kraken-king and peasant.

Good. I've always been good at this game.

[another-miracle]

the thing about hands (4/?)

When Hisame tells Obi of the plan, the first thing Obi wants to do is to laugh.

Because, conniving snake that he is, this is the best he could come up with? 

Obi slides his gaze over to the wretched slime of a man, hoping to project just how incredulous his suggestion is. In turn, Hisame raises an infuriating eyebrow and smirks. Obi’s blood boils. 

A scan across the ballroom; Little Ryuu, who, inexperienced as he is, has his hands clutching his little glass of punch for dear life; Shuu, smiling with daggers behind his glazed eyes; Miss Kiki, with one brow raised, mirroring her- ugh, really?- fiancé. The murmurs around them only increase in volume as Miss and Lord Eisetsu make their way to the gardens.

Obi realizes he does not have the luxury of time.

Plastering on a smile, he excuses himself with a short bow to Hisame. Passing on his wine glass to Little Ryuu, he ruffles his hair and shoots him what Obi hopes is a reassuring look. 

Obi then makes his way toward what can only be his doom.

Approaching the pair, he begins to unbuckle the official cloak draped over his uniform blacks. From where he stands, Miss is stiff and evidently uncomfortable. Obi puts that at the forefront of his mind, instead of paying heed to his heart threatening to claw its way out of his chest.

“Young Miss,” he calls, schooling his face into something neutral- he hopes-  and tries his best to appear nonchalant as he passes on the cloak over Miss’ shoulders. Obi thanks whatever deity there is out there that he has his gloves on. There is no need for him to be familiar in any way, with the softness of Miss’ skin around her collarbones.

Obi’s eyes shift towards Miss, silently confirming the plan. Obi’s right hand then tightens, ever so slightly, around her upper arm. He steps into her space, directs his face towards hers, and begins the count.

1.

Miss’ frame is slight, or perhaps Obi is just larger now. He remembers her weight slumped on him when she was drunk, what seems like a millenia ago. How different she was- they both were- back then.

2.

Her breath passes over his neck, warm and short. As if realizing this, Miss clamps her mouth shut, a blush forming on her cheeks. Obi’s fingers twitch around the cloth, entrapping them further. 

3. 

Miss gazes up at him, her eyes shifting left and right. Obi wants to tell her to look at his nose, or the space between his eyebrows - an amateur move, really. But he finds the way the firelight reflects off her eyes, revealing a different shade of green with every movement, entrancing. He catalogues each one in his mind.

4. 

At this distance, Obi can see the light freckles splashed across Miss’ nose, a testament to the much-needed sunlight she’s been exposed to ever since leaving Lilias. His chest hurts from the need to kiss every single one. 

5.

Miss breathes, and her chest expands, contracts, brushes against the hand Obi perches politely over his cloak. Obi tries to avoid combusting on the spot.

6.

A breeze unlatches a lock of hair from behind Miss’ ear. Again, Obi locks his fingers further into the cloak, willing ice into his veins to keep up the facade of a man colder than he currently is. Instead, he burns.

7.

 Her tongue darts out, wetting her lips. Obi’s gaze flickers down, snaps back up, refusing to pay any heed to that any more than necessary.

8. 

This is torture of the highest order, he thinks. 

9.

-this is something I want every day of my life.

10.

Obi closes his eyes, tattooing Miss’ face behind his eyelids. He smiles, releases his hand from its supposed death grip around Miss’ arm. The traitor hovers around Miss’ back, though, as Miss thanks him and he bids his regards to Lord Eisetsu. 

As the pair walk away, Obi holds his arms behind his back, fingers digging into his sleeves. He releases a breath, and wills the pounding his ears to stop. 

A hand clamps down on his shoulder, startling him. Obi turns. Miss Kiki’s face is unreadable as she returns her hand to her side. Little Ryuu comes up next to him and passes back his wine glass. Obi accepts it, takes a large swig from it, and exhales once more.

His fingers continue to twitch around the stem of the cup, Miss’ warmth a phantom ghost searing the skin beneath his gloves.

[dearausten]

things i noticed while rereading the tenant of wildfell hall (aka my favorite brontë novel) for the third time

- the bromance between gilbert and jack halford (the person he’s writing to, aka his sister’s husband). if i didn’t love gilbert with helen so much, i’d actually go down with this ship.

- i’m DYING to know everything about halford and rose’s relationship, they seem really cute!

- gilbert’s brother, fergus, is actually hilarious. i have never seen someone so dramatic. he’s like “yeah you have to work the land but i gotta look pretty and gossip and that’s actually harder”. also my boy cannot read social cues for the life of him.

- everything from the beginning until we reach helen’s diary. the ANGST. the way he falls in love with her. the way anne brontë gives him a personality and shows us why he is perfect for helen. ALSO THE WAY HE BONDS WITH LITTLE ARTHUR IS ADORABLE.

- just everything about helen. i love her character SO MUCH. she’s so smart, witty, and outspoken. she’s one of the best written female characters ever, no joke.

- the way anne brontë is giving us clues from the beginning! when helen’s aunt gives her advice on marriage, she is unknowingly listing every mistake helen makes in marrying arthur. (not saying what happened is her fault tho!). my girl helen is like “i’d never marry a man without principles just bc i’m horny” and that is exactly what she does! jokes aside, she really did love a arthur, for some reason.

- i had completely forgotten that she was only 18! and arthur huntingdon is said to be 10+ years older than her??????? i completely missed that detail.

- arthur’s manipulation begins even before they get married. the way he knows he’s hurting her when he flirts with annabella and he does exactly that, the way he loves to humiliate her and never thinks of her, only himself... ugh.

- when they do get married, he has the audacity to say that she’s too religious, so she mustn’t love him as much as she says, bc she’s given her heart to the lord. he then proceeds to make the (terrible) point that the only master of women should be their husbands, not god. he only thinks of helen as his possession.

- HOLY SHIT. clearly i can’t have so much time pass before i read this book again bc i had forgotten so many details.

- did i mention i hate arthur’s ass?

- anne brontë does a brilliant job writing the demise of their relationship. it doesn’t happen abruptly. like yes, he was an asshole from day one, but helen didn’t start hating him until the third year of their marriage (still a short time, tho). you can see how much she struggles with loving him while also being awfully aware of his moral flaws, how hard she tries to help him with his drinking problem, how she’s always there for him even though he doesn’t deserve it because he lashes out on her every time he’s upset. a lot happens before she decides she’s had enough of him, and i just love that we see her slowly realize what she’s gotten herself into.

- arthur trying to manipulate her USING THEIR SON is so disgusting. he tries to make her feel bad for spending so much time with their newborn (who he is totally neglecting btw) instead of him.

- i hate you arthur huntingdon. i hate you mr. hargrave. i hate you grimsby. i hate you annabella. i don’t exactly like hattersley but he kinda gets better so he’s forgiven.

- POOR HELEN. she literally thought arthur was finally putting effort into their marriage. every time i read the scene where she finds out about the infidelity i want to cry for her so bad.

- honestly, it’s so badass of her to confront him like that. it took everything in her to control herself and not commit double murder.

- UGH. WHEN ANNABELLA IS TAUNTING HELEN, AND SHE SNAPS ANNABELLA’S MUG BC SHE GOT UNDER HER SKIN AND ARTHUR JUST LAUGHS. istg it makes my blood boil.

- again, POOR HELEN. her finding out about the infidelity was the last straw. arthur stopped pretending to give a damn about her and straight up began to treat her like a piece of crap. i know, he always has, but now he knows how much pain he causes her AND HE PURPOSELY CAUSES HER MORE PAIN. he doesn’t even try to hide it anymore.

- he knows how to hit where it hurts, doesn’t he?

- hargrave is so annoying, but i love how, this way, anne brontë emphasizes why gilbert is a much better match for helen than him. hargrave wants to have her, to dominate her. this goes to say that helen wouldn’t be better off marrying just any other man, but someone who actually takes the time to know her and loves her as an equal, like gilbert.

- ar*ur trying to turn his son against helen is so infuriating. he knows he’s taken everything from her. he knows all she has is her son. he knows how much she loves him, and he wants to take that away too.

- UGH. him and all his friends literally make little arthur, a child, drink as much wine as them. not only that, but ALL OF THEM insult helen in front of him and laugh when he says something that upsets his mother.

- i. cannot. arthur has been neglecting his son since he was born, and only takes an interest on him to teach him how to insult helen and behave like he does, because he knows it drives helen insane.

- thankfully helen is smarter than that son of a bitch and tricks her son into hating wine.

- UGH. AGAIN. when arthur discovers helen’s plan to run away, he doesn’t scream. he doesn’t yell. he MOCKS her. he just stands there with a smile on his face while he takes away her keys AND HE GETS HER PAINTING MATERIALS DESTROYED. OH. MY. GOD.

- once again, arthur knows how to struck a nerve. not only does he completely take away helen’s role as arthur’s educator (something she’s highly invested in) by hiring a governess. HE HIRES HIS FUCKING MISTRESS. i am done. and so is helen.

- SHE’S FREE. i have read this book three times now and i still cannot help to relieve the tension built inside of me when she escapes, as if i didn’t already know what happens.

- a big element to helen’s character is how seriously she takes being a mother. all she does, she does for arthur (her son). she would have stayed with that bastard, and she would’ve willingly suffer the abuse if it weren’t for her son, because he deserves better. no matter what costs her, her son mustn’t grow up like his father. she’d rather her son die by her side, than have him live with huntingdon.

- my poor baby she’s in so much pain :((

- SO. MUCH. ANGST. ANNE BRONTË WHO GAVE YOU THE RIGHT.

- gilbert making amends with lawrence, as he ought to. we love a man who knows when he’s wrong, and wants to make it better. i think this is the main difference between him and arthur. gilbert, in spite of all his flaws, takes responsibility for his actions, unlike helen’s husband (i can’t even name him). also, he is the only man in the novel who loves helen because HE KNOWS HER, and not bc he wants her to be his possession. he just wants to be with her, and make her happy.

- and the angst goes on and on and on!

- helen tells gilbert he can write to her after six months. he doesn’t. because he figures she’s forgotten about him, and he doesn’t blame her! he is hurt. devastated, really. but he understands. he wants her to heal, first and foremost, after he knows how much she’s suffered.

- i love that the last straw for him is hearing that she’s supposedly getting married. and to hargrave, no less. ngl i would try to keep her away from him too.

- oh, sweet misunderstanding! so happy for lawrence tho.

- WHEN THEY FINALLY GET TOGETHER OMG.

- gilbert is a dumbass lmaoooo, SHE’S TELLING YOU SHES IN LOVE WITH YOU YOU IDIOT.

- THEY KISS! GOD BLESS!

- the ending is easy to savor bc of how sad the rest of the book is. like it’s the ONLY moment we see the characters happy.

- I LOVE THEM YOUR HONOR.

- i LOVE that she had time to heal before marrying again. it’s just so satisfying.

to sum it up, the tenant of wildfell hall is still my fave brontë book. for me, the thing that makes it so special are the characters, especially helen. god, how i felt her pain. she is so strong and i love her so much.

guys, this book is SO IMPORTANT. it was back in the day, and still is now. it truly shows just how vulnerable women were in a marriage, and how they were completely stripped of their freedom and liberty. imagine your life depending absolutely on someone else’s whims! i will leave the rant for another post since this one is long enough. feel free to share what you loved about this book as well! <3

[multiverse-imagines]

A/N: part 2 baybeee! Hell hath no fury like an inspired fanfic writer!! time for some Disney magic, y'all!! ✨✨

I'll do the best that I can

Plush!Vash au (part 2)

She stumbled out of bed as she does every morning. She got dressed, trying to decide what she wanted to wear. The choice between a short or long sleeve shirt.

"Fuck, it's only gonna be twenty degrees today" she shook her head and chose the long sleeve, tossing the short sleeve back into the clean, yet unfolded clothes. 

After she was dressed, she scooped me up, and brought me out to the living room, setting me on the end table as she grabbed a quick breakfast of cereal. She had been restless last night, a nightmare probably. It looked as if it still haunted her in these early hours.

I was excited, able and willing to get some more cuddles before she left for work. She watched tiktoks as she ate. She giggled at the funny ones, and swooned when a rare Trigun one came on screen. 

"He's so babygirl. Ugh, I love him so much." She fangirled over the Spiky haired blond on screen. She let out a sigh before gazing my way. She used her thumb to stroke my face, with that all too common loving gaze that said, 'Why cant you be real?' 

"Look at me and my silly little delusions." She gave a chuckle of self pity, "Thinking I could ever win over the heart of a man who doesn't even exist." Her eyes seemed to moisten up with threatening tears. She shook her head, as if the motion would remove the thoughts from her brain. She curled her arms around my tiny being, hugging me to her chest. 

"I'd make him so happy though. I just know I would." She whispered, even though no one else was in this big, lonely house. She checked the time on her phone and sighed.

"Time to head out already. Fuck." She picked her unwilling body up from the chair, and walked to her bedroom, giving my forehead a kiss before setting me down on the pillow of her bed. 

"Have a good day, Vash. Love ya." She petted my hair before leaving the room. I heard another fit of self pity chuckles before I heard the front door shut and her car leave the driveway. 

It really tore me up inside to see the loneliness get to her like this. I'd heard her say to a friend who apparently lived far away that they feel like they can never truly open up to anyone. No one is there to hear the whole story, only bits and pieces of her life. A new mask for every new person in her life from strangers to friends, to family. To her, she's a stranger to everyone.

Everyone except me, it seems. The words she rambles to no one but herself, talking out stories, talking out her mental health, things she would say to Vash The Stampede or Nicholas D Wolfwood. 

Why can't I be with her? Why can't I give more to ease her pain? I wanted to throw something, but I can't move. I have to sit here and let my non-existent blood boil. 

A twitch in my arm, something I'd never felt before. Pain? Was this pain? Arms. Legs. Head. Holy hell this hurts. I shut my eyes. Shut my eyes? I can't do that? I could now, I guess, because they were shut. 

By the time the pain subsided, the bed was a lot smaller. The room seemed a bit smaller, but not too much. The reflective surface of the TV showed a man. A man I'd seen many a time, Vash the Stampede. But only in face and hair.

I figured I'd be the same height when I stood up, but my body wasn't riddled with scars. My left arm was real too. The real Vash had scars and a prosthetic arm.

Upon closer inspection, some of the missing scars were markings on my body, tattoos. It was all of the major ones she liked. The one over my right shoulder, the little cross on my left hip, a thick black tic tac toe over my left peck. Then there were two dark lines where the prosthetic would have been, and a symmetrical scar tattoo that he had on the other arm. Moving my right hand, I noticed tattoos of the thumb stitching he had. She'll be excited about that one.

I was pretty fit as well, the muscles he'd worked so hard on, only to be gifted to me.  Looking to my side, a pair of orange W wire rim sunglasses sat folded on the bed. I stood from the bed- oh shit I was naked.

I dug around in her dresser for a pair of basketball shorts, and one of her larger t-shirts. I prayed that they would fit me. The shirt was a little tight, but liveable until she got home.

I looked on the bed to find the ripped remains of my little coat I used to wear. I hoped that the trade off of losing her beloved plush for, basically, the real thing would be acceptable to her. I was starving. 

I went to the kitchen, trying to find something that didn't require cooking. I didn't know how to cook, and didn't want to risk damaging the house or an appliance. I settled on some chips I'd seen her eat before, and sat on the sofa, opening the bag. Thankfully the process of eating seemed to come naturally to me. 

I found myself picking up the controller for the video game system she had. I booted up the system, and chose a game that had multiple files, and started my own. 

By the time I was hungry again, I checked the fridge and found a small pizza lunch able. I'd seen her heat up the little bread rounds in the microwave. 

"Twenty seconds!" She would sing whenever she would put them in the machine. She did that no matter how much time she needed. I smiled at the memory, excited for her to come home. 

I had just finished the last of the pizza when I heard the front door open and her beautiful singing echoed through the house. She was listening to her headphones, considering the lack of pause. She entered the living room, and stopped mid lyric, frozen in place at the sight of me. The bag of fast food she'd gotten, fell to the floor, unnoticed by her. 

"V…Vash?" Her voice was a whisper as her eyes were locked on me.

"Hey… w-welcome home, Mayfly." I said the favorite nickname she would have wanted to be called by him.

"You're… I've gone full on delusional, haven't I? Have I finally lost it?" she pinched her arm. When I didn't disappear, she bit her thumb. I wasn't gone.

"You're real. You're really here."

"Y-yeah, I had to borrow some of your clothes. I uh, don't fit into my coat anymore." I dug the little fabric coat out of the pocket of my shorts, handing it to her.

"You're… little Vashie. You're really Vash."

"Kinda, I guess. My left arm is real, and my scars aren't. Check this out!" I lifted the sleeve on my left arm, "They're just tattoos. All of the ones you like!" I smiled down at her. She was so much shorter now. She just came up to my chest. She looked back up at me, bringing her hand to my face, she seemed to hesitate before cupping my cheek, caressing the beauty mark under my eye. 

"Holy shit, you're real." Poor thing was still in shock. I spoke her name, and took her hand with my left, and cupped her cheek with my right hand. 

"I'm here. I'll always be here. I've wanted this for so long, just to be here with you." I gently pulled her into a hug. She stiffened up for a second, before finally returning my embrace.

It wasn't long before she began to shake, and her throat released a chorus of sobs. I caressed her hair, and rubbed her back. Something I've always wanted to do when she was crying. I could tell these were tears of joy and relief though. 

"Mayfly, I'll do whatever it takes to make you happy. I've seen your ups and downs for so long, and I want to make everything better for you."

"Yes please. Please please please." She sobbed against my chest, "b-but, you gotta let me know if you need anything too, okay? We can't both be neglecting ourselves to make each other happy, ya know?" She looked up at me with a sniffle.

"Of course silly. We can take care of each other. 50/50?" I laughed, wiping some of her tears away.

"Y-yeah, 50/50." She smiled through her tears. I let go of her to retrieve the fallen bag of food.

"I can start by insisting that you eat something." I handed her the bag.

"Oh yeah, I completely forgot about that." 

--

We laid in bed that night, she'd eaten her food, and she'd told me about her day at work. We laid tangled up in each other, while one of her favorite movies played. One she'd probably played a billions times since my arrival. Not that I cared. 

"You're really sure that you're okay with looking after me?" She asked for the 3rd time since the movie started.

"Yes, Mayfly. I want to make sure you're happy, and loved, and heard and can be your authentic self around me. It's all I've ever wanted for you."

"But I'm a lot to handle. I don't wanna be a burden to you." 

"You've never been those things before. You relied on me when I was just your plush toy. Please continue to rely on me."

Her face went red, remembering I still have all my memories of being a toy.

"Oh, oh no, I'm so sorry, that means you've seen me-"

"And it makes me love you even more, Mayfly." I cupped her face with my free hand, "I love who you are. The you that you don't show anyone else. Your real opinions, your real emotions… every inch of your body…" my heart fluttered as I pressed a kiss to your forehead. 

"You deserve Vash the Stampede. You deserve to be loved by him, and your kind heart deserves to love him." I pressed my forehead to hers, "I-I mean, I may not totally be Vash, but I am officially licensed." I chuckled, "so let me be your Vash. It's your turn to be loved."