#u get a kiss u get a kiss everyone gets a kiss
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sixpennydame · 3 days ago
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𝐌𝐢𝐧𝐞.
𝑳𝒆𝒗𝒊 𝑨𝒄𝒌𝒆𝒓𝒎𝒂𝒏 𝒙 𝒇𝒆𝒎!𝒓𝒆𝒂𝒅𝒆𝒓 // .6k words
𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭: Possessive!Levi. Sexually explicit content - minors do not interact.
𝐀/𝐍: Written for this anon ask. Based on the song, R U Mine? by Arctic Monkeys
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Captain Levi pisses you off.
How can he be sitting across the table from you, listening to Erwin go on and on about Survey Corps funding.
As if he hadn’t been fucking your brains out last night in this very room.
His eyes haven’t even glanced your way since you sat down. Had it all been just an elaborate dream?
No, you know for a fact it wasn’t. You have the kiss marks on your breasts to prove it.
Your mind wanders to the moments Levi had you spread out on this table, his tongue - walls, his magnificent tongue - drawing slow, lethargic circles around your throbbing clit. When you came the first time, he’d looked at you smugly.
“Such a dirty girl, letting me have my way with you here. Aren’t you afraid somebody will catch us?” He asked, undoing the belt of his pants.
“Aren’t you?”
“Not really.” He settled himself between your thighs. “And you’re not going anywhere until I’m completely satisfied.”
Now, sitting amongst your fellow Survey Corps members, that satisfaction feels like a distant memory.
“…Captain Levi, your report.” Erwin’s voice bellows through the meeting hall.
Levi’s chair scrapes across the floor and he stands. You allow your line of sight to flit towards him. His body weight shifts from one leg to the other and your eyes can’t help but move down the contours of his shirt to the waistband of his pants. Your mouth starts to water as you think about how it felt to have his cock in your mouth, his hand in your hair as he thrust a little deeper, seeing how much of him you could take.
“The thrust formation seemed to be effective—“
Wait…
What is Levi talking about?
“—during our last expedition. It allowed my squad and I to move in easily.”
You blink and take a breath. Now everything Levi says in that beautiful baritone voice of his is turning you on.
Get yourself together.
You spend the rest of the meeting looking everywhere but in Levi’s direction. The time drags on as each Squad Leader gives their report, and you begin to wish you could be anywhere else but this room with this man. When the meeting ends and the room is empty, you breathe a sigh of relief.
Until you hear the door close behind you.
“Are you trying to avoid me all day?” a familiar baritone voice asks.
You stand, determined to give him your most nonchalant face. “I should ask you that question. You didn’t look at me once during that meeting.”
Levi quickly closes the distance between you until you bump against the edge of the table. “What? Did you want me to take you again on this table in front of everyone? Such an exhibitionist.”
Just being this close to him again has your core throbbing. His hands land on either side of you, caging you between him and the table as he moves even closer, his lips brushing your earlobe.
“No…” you weakly answer, quickly turning to putty in his hands, “it’s just…”
All coherent thoughts leave you as he begins to pepper kisses along your neck, leaving you speechless.
“Do you want me to tell you that I haven’t stopped thinking about you since last night? That the meeting was torture because all I could see was you?” His hands move up the curves of your waist and he lets out a sigh. “I want to see the marks I made on you.”
Buttons and straps come undone as he releases your breasts. His eyes flash when he sees the purple bruises.
“Tell me, y/n,” his voice is a low growl that sends electricity through your whole body, “tell me you’re mine.”
Do you dare tell him that you’ve been his since the moment you first laid eyes on him? Do you confess that you’d given your body to him before his hands and lips had even claimed you?
Instead, you look deep into those silvery blue eyes and whisper -
“Yes…yes, Levi. I’m yours.”
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bunni-v1 · 2 days ago
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so shadow milk legendary costume is coming so can we get more content of pre-corruption smilk 😝😝😭 pretty please and thank you ♥️
🍓Again I’m gonna call him Blueberry Yogurt because typing out pre corruption is annoying as fuck. Anyway, yes you can pookie mwah mwah mwah! These are short, but I still hope u like them :)
-Blueberry Yogurt is veryyyyy different from Shadow Milk. Shadow Milk describes his past self as a “Goody two shoes wet rag with no personality,” and while he’s being dramatic I don’t think he’s far off.
-Blueberry Yogurt is contemplative, gentle, kind, and above all else caring. He loves his subjects and his friends and he aims to share his knowledge with everyone. He’s in all sense of the word harmless. A sweet cookie with nothing but good intentions.
-He’s, essentially, his position as sage. And he doesn’t mind that, but he’s never really considered that he could be anything more. It’s what he was baked for, of course.
-Booooriiingggggg, as Shadow Milk would put it. But Blueberry Yogurt was content with things, it’s only after he realized cookies turn from the truth — mixed with the understanding of the sheer amount of power he held, that his mind changed.
-You we’re part of that realization. That, maybe, he could be more than what he was. That the life he lived wasn’t all it seemed to be. He was never made to fall in love, but he did, whose to say there isn’t more for him out there?
-But before that, he was likely the perfect partner to have. He cares a lot about his partner and their well-being, and he wants to be their total equal, even if they’re weaker than him.
-He spends a lot of his spare time with you. He’s an incredibly busy cookie with too many things to do, but he will always find time to spend on you. You are a high priority in his life, and he makes sure you know that.
-He likes having you around him, even when you aren’t doing the same things. Just you being there brings him peace of mind and makes him feel content.
-You being educated is equally important to him, so he takes the time to have conversations about serious topics. He’s particularly fond of reading with you and discussing the books with a critical eye. He won’t let you be blind to the truth, and if you’re afraid of it, he’ll work with you to ensure you aren’t.
-He’ll take you around the town when he visits, and most cookies know you as “The Sage’s Lover”. He won’t admit it, but that fact makes him proud. He loves to show you off, and he loves the fact that others know you’re together.
-Oh he does this cute thing where he’ll sweep you up in his arms and dance around with you. He’ll press you tightly against his body and swirl around like you’re at a real ball.
-He is so much more open about how much he loves you. He has no reason to hide or fear his affections for you, so he just doesn’t. His love is unabashedly displayed through physical touch as Blueberry Yogurt.
-Soft and gentle kisses pressed upon you dough. He burns into your dough his love for you so that you never forgot how much you are adored.
-He pulls you close and whispers his adoration like a prayer, as if to convince you of his love for you. Like you might forget if he doesn’t remind you so tenderly.
-He treats you to beautiful dates in locations you’ve only dreamed about, each one more heartfelt and romantic than the last. They’re built specifically to wow you, and he’s phenomenal at his job.
-He also gives you gifts all the time, hand made or things he found around the kingdom, it doesn’t matter. They’re all things you’ll make good use of, he makes sure of that.
-His goal is to make you feel considered and thought of. Again, he’s very successful. Everything he does takes you into account, and you become a very important part of his day to day life.
-One thing he does that Shadow Milk keeps is his love for carrying you around. It’s not a strength thing, he isn’t showing off, he just loves carrying you around. He feels like he can really care for you like that, so he does it as much as he can.
-He’s also very protective of you. He doesn’t stop you from engaging difficult topics and finding out truths, but he does stop others from disturbing your peace. It’s the one time he’ll use his magical abilities for selfish reasons, his need to keep you safe and happy winning out his morals for once.
-This is why when he feels himself… slipping… he sends you away as soon as he can. He doesn’t want you to think of him differently, and he’ll even take extra measures to ensure he won’t find you once he’s fully gone. (It’s the most annoying thing about himself, if you ask Shadow Milk. He plans for everything far too well.)
-It does ache and pain him to be so far from you when he does it, but it’s more important to him that you are safe. Even if it means you have to be safe from him.
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mrs-kmikaelson · 8 hours ago
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apollo
Pairing: Aaron Hotchner x sunshine!reader Summary: Aaron thinks you're just about the most radiant person he's ever met. But then you fly too close to the sun, and all your light disappears. Warnings: grumpy x sunshine turned not sunshine, references to greek myth of icarus and the sun god helios, apollo lore, violence, mentions of reaper arc, heartbreak, complicated relationships, avoidance, unresolved trauma, feelings, hopeful ending Words: 4.8K
Masterlist | icarus (part 1) | helios (part 2)
a/n: this is the end! thank u for all the love! i love this series sm, and i'll prolly end up writing lil blurbs for it (esp at ur request). there's sm feelings in this one. enjoy!
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"I need to leave, Y/N."
"Wait— wait, we can talk about this, can't we?" You stepped closer to her, distraught colouring your face. "We can get you help."
She shook her head, a sad smile crossing her face as if she was saying she knew you wouldn't understand. Poor, sweet Y/N, her eyes said. Too good for this world. Too naïve. Too hopeful. What she ended up saying was, "No, Y/N. I can't."
"I— I don't understand." Tears welled up in your eyes. Her words didn't make sense. None of it made sense.
The smile on her face never fell. Only a single tear did, racing down her cheek. It occurred to you then that you'd never seen her cry.
"Oh, Y/N/N." She grabbed your hand, squeezing it tightly. "I hope you never have to."
When she let go of your hand, you knew there was nothing more you could say. She was leaving, and there was absolutely nothing you could do about it.
But, deep down, you knew she'd already been long gone.
"Goodbye, Y/N."
And before you knew it, she was out the door, too far away to hear you whisper back.
"Goodbye, Elle."
When Elle left, you didn't understand it. As the only female profilers, you stuck together like glue. You both came from units where you were at the top of your game, just to be shuffled back down to the bottom, having to learn an entirely new competence.
You didn't get it. The work tore her away. The job took too much away from her, took too much out of her. But that was the job. But what about you?
She could walk away from the job, fine. But why did she walk away from you?
You didn't get it then. Too young. Too naïve. Too hopeful.
But now you were older. You knew too much. The hope had been sucked out of you.
You understood now.
You understood what it meant to not be able to take it anymore, to not be able to face the people you loved while knowing you weren't the same. And you wanted to. You desperately wanted things to go back to the way they were. 
You wanted to go back to Rossi ruffling your hair, cracking jokes about your age but always knowing he took you seriously. You wanted to go back to lunch breaks with Penelope, talking about your nails and boys and feeling like a teenager. You wanted to back to laughing in Emily's apartment, her cat crawling across your lap. You wanted to go back to watching sci-fi movies with Reid, too convoluted to grasp. You wanted to go back to when Derek would tease you instead of treating you like you were made of glass. You wanted to go back to watching JJ's son without her wondering if you were in the state of mind to do it.
And Hotch.
Aaron. 
You wanted to hit rewind to before everything happened, if not just to be at his side again. Before you tried to kiss him and before he pulled away. Before a serial killer decided he was God and your life was his to play with.
But you couldn't, and now you understood Elle better than you ever did. Because no matter how hard you tried, you couldn't be the same sunshine everyone loved. 
You couldn't stay there anymore.
You submitted your resignation. You didn't know what happened next—you never thought further along than the BAU.
But you had to leave.
You understood now.
You wished you didn't.
— 
The words echoed throughout your head on a loop.
Hotch. Accident. Hospital.
The Reaper.
If it hadn't been for Morgan, you would've jumped into that SUV and driven there immediately. But he stopped you, taking away the keys and regarding you with a soft but firm stance. You both knew it wasn't safe for you to drive.
You didn't talk about the reasons why.
Now, you sat to Aaron's left. He was sleeping. He'd never seemed so peaceful.
How ironic it was that he had to be stabbed before he took a break. Even if you knew it wasn't peaceful, not really.
A U.S. Marshal had just come and retrieved Jack and Haley, taking them to an undisclosed location. Their lives were upended. His life was upended.
Your fearless leader, stony and brave. He approached every challenge with determination, like he knew he could beat it. Aaron Hotchner was a man who won battles. But when you walked into that hospital room, for the first time since you met him, he looked afraid.
He looked like he'd already lost.
Your heart squeezed in your chest. It wasn't fair. 
Suddenly, a mumble broke you out of your thoughts. "I can hear you thinking in my sleep."
You looked down, seeing him slowly open his eyes. You fixed him with a smile, even though it didn't feel right on your lips. Be brave, Y/N, your mind chided. He'd be brave for you. "Really? I can hear you thinking in your sleep."
His face remained blank, unfazed by your attempt to change the subject. He did that often—calling you out. Never maliciously, always with the greater good at heart. But he knew you. Sometimes, it felt like he knew you too well.
You wondered, did you know him as well as he knew you? 
You liked to think so.
Like usual, you crumbled under his gaze, looking away. If you kept looking at him, nothing would stop the onslaught of tears from making their way down your face, and you wouldn't do that to him. You wouldn't cry; it wasn't your right to. You weren't his wife. 
But you were something. Enough of something to feel the need to cry, anyway.
A shaky exhale left your lips. "Why do bad things always happen to good people?"
The room was silent after your question, the only sounds being his heart monitor and the shuffling of the hospital outside. The beeping felt like a taunt, a reminder that Aaron's life hung in the balance, that he could've died.
It made you realize that you weren't specific enough. What you really meant was, why did bad things always happen to him?
Aaron Hotchner. The leader. The father. A good man. The best man you'd ever met.
The man you'd fallen in love with.
When he responded, you could hear the despair in his voice, like he had the same questions.
But for once, he didn't have the answers.
"I don't know."
You didn't have to knock on Aaron's door long before he was opening it, having expected you. You grinned, holding up the brown bags in your hands. "I come bearing gifts. Chinese."
"You're a godsend," he praised, undoing his house alarm. You had helped him install it when he got out of the hospital, no questions asked. 
While he did that, you placed the food on the table, going to grab some plates and drinks. This was the rhythm you'd settled into, a routine. You came over every other night under the guise of updating him with your cases, but really, it was a lot more than that for you.
You hoped it was for him, too.
You always brought food. Sometimes, he even cooked (it was edible). It was your way of making sure he ate.
You never talked about what happened. He never talked about Haley or Jack, even though you knew they were the only thing on his mind. You talked about work, and the weather, and what movies you were gonna be watching after dinner, but never anything that mattered.
You didn't need to. This, being here, mattered. You didn't need anything more than that.
You just wanted him to know he wasn't alone. No matter what happened, you'd always be there for him. This was your way of showing that.
After watching a movie you didn't pay much attention to, you stood at the door, shrugging on your coat. You were just about to leave when his hand enveloped your wrist, making you turn around.
Curiously, you stared up at him. "Hotch?" Your voice was soft, the kind of soft that came with fragile things. Fragile. Delicate. Valuable.
Aaron opened his mouth and then closed it again, looking like he knew exactly what he wanted to say without knowing how to say it. He could command a room with quiet confidence, negotiate with the most unstable unsubs and power-hungry police chiefs, and give a profile like no one you'd ever met. But when it came to his own emotions, he was at a loss for words.
You weren't used to seeing that. There was something about it. You didn't like watching him struggle, but some part of you was satisfied that you could make him pause. It made you think that, maybe, he thought about you the same way you thought about him.
Just maybe.
When he seemed to collect his thoughts, he spoke. "Thank you." He didn't take his eyes off you, making sure you knew how earnest he was.
Your breath got caught in your throat. The weight of his gaze told you everything else he wasn't saying. How this wasn't just a thank you for the food or the DVD. This was a thank you for everything.
But, in your eyes, he had nothing to thank you for.
So you smiled and said, "Don't mention it."
And you hoped he knew how earnest you were, too.
You awoke to loud pounding on your door.  You remained motionless, hoping the person would get bored and go away, but the knocking persisted.
Glancing at your alarm clock, you groaned. It was far too early for anyone to be visiting you. Today, any time would be too early. But the knocking only continued, so with another groan, you rolled out of bed, throwing on a sweater in a hassle as you yelled, "I'm coming!"
You muttered curses to yourself all the way to the door, hastily unlocking it. When you finally threw it open, you were ready to give someone a piece of your mind, only to bet met with who you were least expecting.
Your mouth fell open slightly, all your curses dying on your tongue. And like you'd been doused in water, you suddenly felt wide awake.
On the other side of the threshold, Derek Morgan gave you a soft smile, his expression light while his eyes carried all the heavy things you thought you left at the BAU.
Now, all those things were at your doorstep.
"Hi, princess." He paused. "We have to talk."
— 
You would've thought that, after all your time in the BAU, you would've gotten used to hospitals.
Apparently not.
As your eyelids fluttered open, you were disoriented, instantly closing them again at the sheer bright lights. The sound of feet shuffling came to your ears, followed by a flicking sound.
When you opened your eyes again, the lights were off, and Derek Morgan stood in front of you. He gave you his classic smile, but for some reason, it looked a little tighter than usual, a little bit harder to conceive.
What had happened? Why did he look so sad? Was he okay?
"D-Derek?" you croaked, interrupted by a cough.
Quick on his feet, he was soon passing you a glass of water, guiding the straw into your mouth. "Easy there, easy. There you go." He was tending to you like you were a sick child. You weren't sick. You weren't a child.
What happened? Why was he taking care of you? Why did you need to be taken care of?
When he removed the straw from your mouth, you repeated your question. "Derek, what's wrong?"
He looked like he didn't want to answer you. Instead, he countered, "Y/N, do you remember what happened?"
As if his question singlehandedly opened pandora's box, pain suddenly radiated from your lower body, aching all over. 
Your brain caught up with your body, and then the pain intensified.
You shakily exhaled. "Yes."
Derek exhaled, too, but his looked more like relief than anything. Relief that he wouldn't have to explain this to you. Relief that he wouldn't have to say the words out loud. 
"You were in surgery for a while," he said. "Yesterday night. The doctors say you'll make a speedy recovery."
You didn't respond.
"Garcia's still flying in. She won't believe anything I say until she sees it with her own eyes," he lightly chuckled. But his tone was heavy. No jokes could erase that. "The others'll be on their way back when they wake up. I told 'em you were in good hands."
You wanted to laugh. You tried. The only thing that left your mouth was a sob.
Derek was immediately at your side, cradling your head into his chest, letting your tears soak his shirt and not saying a single word about any of it. You wanted that to make it feel better, but you just felt empty.
Like there were holes in your body.
You sat on your couch, wrapped in a warm blanket as Derek rummaged through your cupboards, looking for something to give that was fit for human consumption. You would've been a good host and offered him tea, but he already had a pot on the stove.
He said you looked like you hadn't eaten. You didn't deny it.
"Everything in your fridge is expired, so I ordered us some breakfast from that place downtown," he informed you, setting down two mugs of tea on the coffee table and taking a seat in the armchair across from you. 
You watched the steam twirl into the air, nodding blankly.
Derek sighed. "Kid, I'm worried about you."
You sighed back in response. "I'm fine." The words came out harsher than intended.
Derek's eyes softened. "You quit your job, Y/N. You love the BAU."
Love. Loved. You shook your head, lightly scoffing through your nose. For the first time in a while, you were honest. "I love the BAU when it isn't taking everything away from me." You could count the things this job had taken from you on two hands too many, turning your reflection into a stranger.
It made you wonder what you'd do without it.
Derek's eyes didn't meet yours, looking down at the floor instead. The room went quiet. You could hear the cars outside, the rest of the world moving on while you stayed right where you were, stagnant.
Right now, you were in your apartment. Your feet were touching your hardwood floor. Your fingers played with a loose string on your blanket. Derek sat across from you. Your body was here.
But in reality, your mind was stuck in that house. Stuck walking into a trap with Morgan right behind you.
"I'm sorry."
At his sudden words, you looked up. His eyes locked with yours. You didn't know how long it'd been that you'd sat in silence, but you certainly didn't expect it to be broken with those words.
You furrowed your brows. "What?"
Despite the long period of quietness that came before, he didn't stay quiet now. He didn't even look like he had to think about what he was saying—almost like he'd thought it all a thousand times before. "Y/N, I'm sorry that you're in pain. And if I could switch places with you, I would— in a heartbeat." He leaned forward in his chair. "There's not a day that goes by that I don't think about what happened. About how I left you alone." His voice tightened up. "But Y/N, I swear to you, if you come back to the BAU, I won't ever leave you alone like that again."
Strong conviction laced his voice, like he was under oath. For a moment, you were confused by what he was saying. He never left you alone— oh.
Oh.
Tears welled up in your eyes. "Derek—" your voice cracked. Oh, you felt terrible. So, so terrible.
How long had one of your best friends blamed himself for something he had no control over? How long had this slipped past you?
You were supposed to be one of the best profilers in the nation.
But right now, you just felt terrible. 
"Derek, I never blamed you." A tear slid down your cheek against your wishes. "This isn't your fault. It never was."
Your vision was so blurry that you didn't see him crying, but you did see him wipe at his eyes. That made you get up, and he met you in the middle, wrapping his arms around you and engulfing you in his embrace.
In his arms, you cried freely, just like that morning in the hospital. You cried for all the things you pretended not to cry about. For all the things you lost. The things you didn't see. The person you were. The person you could've been.
"I'll never leave you alone again, you hear me, kid?" Derek hugged you tighter through his muffled words, making sure you didn't just hear them but that you felt them. "We're family."
Family.
You hugged him back just as tight. If you lost everything, you still had that. You might have lost yourself, but your family was right there, shining a light in the darkness, looking for you.
You prayed they'd find you.
— 
When Morgan left, it was dark out. He only left after a lot of crying and even more food, but you felt different. Reminded of what you still had.
You weren't okay. Nothing was okay. But you wanted to things to be able to get better. You didn't just want to give up and walk away from it everything. You built a life at the BAU with people you loved. Maybe there was one person you even loved too much.
God, he hurt you. He hurt you in irreversible ways, leaving you out in the cold multiple times, begging for him to see you just for him to turn away. 
And you knew he cared about you. No one acted the way he did without caring. Sometimes, you thought Aaron Hotchner cared too much, masking it behind a wall of indifference. 
Before all this happened, you were allowed behind the wall. He showed you the man he hid from others. You fell in love with that man. You missed him.
You just wanted to go back to those versions of yourself. The Y/N who would make a stupid joke late at night and the Aaron who would be too tired to pretend not to smile.
But Hotch wanted to talk about it. Aaron did, too, but it was mostly Hotch. A different version of him that was too concerned, too focused on drilling the truth out of you.
Could you give it to him? There was a time when you would've given him anything; all he had to do was ask. Now, you weren't so sure. There were certain parts of yourself you couldn't just hand out, certain things you wanted to keep for you and you alone.
You had already given up so much. You already gave your heart to Aaron Hotchner once, and he discarded it. Who was to say this time would be any different?
No. You couldn't give him everything.
But you'd give him something.
You found the route to Hotch's apartment the same way you did time and time before, like a dance you still knew the steps to. You knew when to turn right and when to turn left, when to keep going straight and when to stop. Nothing about this was unfamiliar.
Aaron Hotchner was once the most familiar person you'd ever known.
But you knew things were different.
Even though the elevator up to his floor hadn't changed and he still had the same mat outside his door, you knew that you weren't the same. You had changed. You weren't familiar anymore.
And so, when he opened the door and his brows raised up to his hairline, you understood the surprise. You didn't just do this—you didn't just show up at his apartment unannounced, not anymore.
His lips parted. You weren't sure if he was going to speak or if he was just in shock. You spoke first regardless.
"I, um," you wrung your hands together, "I don't have food this time." A nervous smile lit up your face, no less nervous than your first time in his office. Maybe more nervous this time. Maybe you hid it better back then.
And maybe he could hide his emotions better back then, too. The shock on his face didn't clear until after you had spoken. He blinked, then opened his door wider. "Please."
A small thank you left your lips as you walked in, crossing the threshold into a world you knew you wouldn't be able to leave again.
The apartment looked like it hadn't changed at all. The only thing that caught your eye were the toys splayed out on the living room floor.
Your heart spiked, but as if Hotch could read your mind, he said, "Jack is asleep."
Glad you weren't interrupting anything, the tension in your shoulders was released. You wondered if that's what he saw: visual cues that indicated your mental state. Was it mind reading or behaviour?
Was he a profiler, or did he just know you as well as you both thought he did?
You couldn't really tell anymore.
"Would you like something to drink?" he queried.
"No, I uh..." this was small talk. You weren't here for this; you didn't even know what you were here for, but it was for more than this.
Whatever you were here for, you had to figure it out before you lost your nerve.
You turned around, finding him right behind you. You inhaled a sharp breath. The last time he was this close to you— 
"You hurt me, Hotch." The words tumbled out of your mouth before you even had the time to filter them. You watched his face fall. You continued, anyway. "You hurt me when you left me alone that night. And I— I can't fault you for rejection. But you left me all over again when I— when I needed you."
"Y/N." He took a step closer.
You took a step back.
"I needed you. I really, really needed you." Tears built in your eyes. "But you weren't there." You wiped away the tears in your eyes before they could fall, refusing to cry. "And then you have me go on the record to talk about the most horrible experience of my life, and suspend me when you don't get what you want. Like I'm just some rookie agent."
Unlike the previous conversations you'd had, Aaron didn't say anything to his defense. He stood there, unmoving, letting you say what you needed to say. You were equal parts grateful and equal parts angry. Exasperated.
You wanted him to say something. You wanted to know if it was really all in your head, if it really happened or if you imagined it. "Is that—" you faltered, "is that all I am to you, Hotch? Just an agent? Did I ever—" you swallowed, "did I ever mean anything to you?"
"Yes." His response was rapid, his eyes narrowing as if he was insulted by the question. As if he was shocked you could ever think otherwise. He took a step closer to you, and this time, you didn't step back. "If I have ever made you feel like you are 'just an agent,' then I sincerely apologize." He paused, his eyes boring into yours. "Y/N, you are one of the most qualified and accomplished agents I have ever met, let alone had the pleasure of working with. And I can say with absolute certainty that you are one of the best people I have ever known. You are beautiful, inside and out, and full of so much light that you have brightened every room you've walked into." His words reverberated through the quiet room, soaking into your bones and into every fibre of your being. "So, if I've pressured you since your return, it is because I am worried."
Your breath hitched as he took another step closer. "I'm sorry I wasn't there. I'm sorry for leaving you alone that night and every other night afterward. I was—" he took a breath, looking down briefly. When his eyes met yours again, they were just as honest. Brave. Afraid. "I was terrified I'd lose you. That I would ruin what we had. And then I was scared for what happened to you. Too afraid to look you in the eye after I made a decision that almost cost you your life. By the time you got back to the BAU, my fear wasn't just losing you physically. It was losing you. Your heart. Your spirit. All the things I love about you."
Your heart might've stopped then and there. After a few seconds, you echoed, "Love?"
Aaron didn't back down or retract what he said. He nodded, like he was confirming it you and to himself. "Yes."
There were words he wasn't saying; you understood that. There were words you weren't saying, either.
But you knew what it meant for things to go unsaid. People blamed themselves. People crumbled. They said things they didn't mean to compensate for what they weren't saying. They were crushed under the weight of it all.
You didn't want that to happen anymore.
You took a step back, not because you were stepping away from the conversation, but because you were stepping into it. You nodded toward the couch. "Let's have that talk."
Aaron's eyes flooded with relief. You both made your way to his couch and sat down.
And then you talked until the sun came up.
— 
Your talk with Aaron wasn't easy. And despite your best promises to yourself, you still ended up crying, anyway. 
You weren't naïve. That may have been the first conversation you had, but it wouldn't be the last. There was still so much you had to talk about, so much you had to work through, but you had the time to do it.
Your suspension was lifted, but you didn't return to the BAU. At least, not right away. You decided not to throw yourself back into it, to let yourself find your footing first and process everything you tried to shove down.
Every member of the team supported you, and you knew there was a spot waiting for you when you were ready. Garcia had reassured you there were issues with your resignation, anyway (which you knew was undoubtedly her doing). You thanked her for her troubles.
She visited you often while you were home alone, updating you on the team's shenanigans. And Rossi visited you with enough food to feed a shelter, rendering it pointless to go grocery shopping at all. You accused him of spoiling you. He retorted that he could cook for the whole team if he wanted to.
And that's how you ended up where you were, underneath the fairy lights in his backyard as Reid summarized Greek mythology to you.
Gesturing his hands in the air, he explained, "No, actually— although thought to be, Apollo is not the sun god. Helios is. Helios is meant to be a personification of the sun—the sun in human form. But Apollo is god of the sun—an important distinction in categorization. He's not the sun, but he's not supposed to be. He just has sunlike features, and— I'm sorry. I'm rambling, aren't I?"
He looked sheepish, but you were leaning forward in your seat. "No, not at all." You gave him a reassuring smile. "Please, keep going."
Spencer's eyes lit up, and he went on, "Well, Apollo has many more characteristics that make him an interesting god to look at it, like his love of truth, music, poetry, healing, and..."
As he continued, you couldn't help but connect what he was talking about to yourself.
He's not the sun.
But he's not supposed to be.
Inadvertently, you realized what you'd been trying to learn for so long. The answer was right in front of you the whole time, but now, you finally understood it.
You kept trying to be this person that didn't exist. The sun. A work of fiction. But you couldn't be that. The sun wasn't up all the time. It wasn't always bright. It was impossible to be light at every waking moment. The light didn't define Apollo, and it didn't define you.
No, you realized. You weren't the sun.
You were so much more than that.
taglist: @ithinkitzleslie @burrithorr @ill-be-okay-soon-enough @bunchofcells-blog @hotchspearl @famouslywaiting @lailamares @avis-writeshq @zoeyredbird1 @dyslexicreader64 @lolagaming23 @thomasshelbyswife @spct0r @qualitygiantshoepsychic @duruxoxo @idontlikesleeping
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ryusuisloveinterest · 19 hours ago
Note
hey girl!! it's been a while,
I've been having massive stanley brainrot, so may I request Stanley x Reader where reader is one of the scientists in the DARPA expo and was also one of the ones who revived by themselves. Reader and Xeno are like close colleagues and Stanley falls for reader??
Also, how do u feel abt dr stone season 4 coming out next year?! I'm sooo excited honestly!!
I’m so this took so long!!!! I’m loving season 4 so far and Stanley is cooking every time he’s on screen😩 I hope you like it and thank you for your patience bestie💕💕💕💕
Stanley x DARPA scientist reader💝
You’ve worked with Xeno countless times, on different assignments, experiments, and whatever else people at NASA do
Though it still took awhile for you to meet Stanley
I believe Xeno would keep his personal life to himself, keeping the line between his life and work very bolded
But one day he invited you to his house to work on some thing together or because he’s let you cross that line 
You both chat for a while with some tea and treats when some grumpyass soldier barges through the front door 
“Guess what they’re doin now Xeno??? They’re cutting down spending for my branch!! Not only that but my men are leaving left and right! That’s some utter bull-“ 
Stanley pauses when he sees you, his eyes in complete awe at the sight of you 
“Oh um pardon me…” he reaches his hand out for a handshake, “Lieutenant Stanley Snyder, it’s a pleasure to meet you. I apologize for that outburst.”
You giggle and introduce yourself as well, “it’s ok Lieutenant Snyder, the government doesn’t treat us that nicely at NASA either”
“Please, just call me Stanley”
Xeno gets the vibe REAL QUICK
He’ll quickly say something like, “oh I need to use the restroom,” or “I’ll go prepare more tea” and just leaves you with Stanley 
After that you’ll see Stanley appear around the office more and more
“Oh sorry y/n I didn’t mean to bug you. Xeno’s office is right around the corner so I thought I’d come say hi”
Xeno’s office is halfway across the building💀
That brings us to the DARPA meeting
Everyone’s discussing the birds and stone and idk what else they talked about lol
But a small break is held
Stanley gives you a drink while you two talk about random things
“Say y/n, maybe after all this shit is over, me and you can go have a little drink together, my treat. What do you think?”
“You better be the one paying, since you’re asking me out~”
A smile breaks out of the soldier
BUT THEN A MYSTERIOUS BIG GREEN LIGHT POPS OUT OF NOWHERE AND EVERYONE GETS TURNED TO STONE😛
3700 years pass when you’re randomly awakened 
You walk around and immediately get a gun to your back
Without fear, you giggle and say, “is this your idea of a first date Stanley?”
His cool helmet falls off and you see the man you’ve waited 3700 years for
He kisses your forehead
“I’ll be sure to make it up to you with much better dates doll~”
You two waste no time in starting to date
Ofc Xeno still need a help working to rebuild, so during the day everyone focuses on working and rebuilding the modern world 
But as soon as the day’s over or works all done, yours his and his ONLY
Like I’m talking bodies constantly touching (whether it’s hand holding, sitting on his lap, cuddling, other things👀)
Always talking to each other, whether it’s deep or not is up to you two
Tries to take you on whatever dates you can in the stone world (dinners, stargazing, crafts, etc.)
While he might cut Xeno off on some of his science rants, but he’d never do that to you 
“Sorry if I’m talking a lot Stanley, I’ll stop it you-“
“No I like your voice, way better than Xeno’s.”
Overall 1000/10 would recommend 
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toiletclown · 6 hours ago
Text
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆ you wanna kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid.
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spencer agnew x f!reader
fluff <3 word count: 6354
summary: being best friends with spencer agnew was the greatest gift the universe ever gave you. you don't have anyone else in your life who keeps up with you like he does. which is why the flirty banter between you two is so fun, right? it's silly. it doesn't mean anything. right??
(basically the you wanna kiss me so bad x that's so gross get tf away from me freak bestie to lovers trope. or whatever. i don't know. love u.)
��。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
“Spencer, ew!” You yelled from across the Board AF table. You were in the middle of a Moose Master shoot, and it had very quickly turned to chaos – as usual. Luckily, Moose Master shoot days meant a long, long lunch after wrap to recuperate the massive amount of energy you lost after screaming and laughing like a banshee for an hour. 
“What, you don't think that’s funny?” Spencer shot back. He was using his freshly-pulled Echo Master card on you, because of course he was. “I'm the one in charge here! You're my echo and you have to say baaaabe if I say it.” He dragged out the word, a whiny cadence, then crossed his arms in front of his chest. Cute, he was attempting to put his foot down.
“I’m not doing that, Spencer!” You crossed your arms right back. Two could play at this game.
Being best friends with Spencer Agnew was the greatest gift the universe ever gave you.
Courtney, Chanse, and Angela were just whipping their heads back and forth, following the banter from each side of the table.
“Alex!” Spencer called out, a last ditch effort.
Alex laughed from off-camera. “Sorry, Y/N. He has the card, he makes the rule.”
“Judas!” You hissed. 
Everyone was laughing at this point, and despite your bickering, you were over the moon. You loved your job, and all your friends. 
“What’s wrong, babe?” He winked at you, and you pretended to gag.
“Babe, nothing is wrong,” You deadpanned. You didn't use the same inflection as Spencer, wondering if he would try to argue that that counted as a penalty.
“Penalty card! Pull a penalty card!” Spencer’s face was filled with childlike glee. Bastard, of course he would pull that shit. Although, you selfishly loved seeing his face light up like this. You loved seeing him happy. 
“For what?” Courtney asked, no malice in her voice – they were enjoying the show.
“No answering questions!” Spencer yelled, thinking he pulled one over on you.
But really, Courtney pulled one over on him. “Penalty card, pull a penalty card, Spence!” You mocked him, rubbing it in his face.
“Bro, you want to kiss me so bad right now,” Spencer made several kissy noises at you.
“Do we still have a yeet bucket available?” You begged, tipping your head back and rolling your eyes.
“Do we?” Spencer asked you, remembering the rule that got him yet another “bummer, this is your penalty card to keep!” card. It was first to seven, and he was at six. You, however, were at four.
The game went on and on, you echoing Spencer’s babe, incessantly. You finally missed one and took your penalty card, but you had lasted several rounds of play and were still proud of yourself. However, if this was a bummer card, you would lose.
You hold the penalty card face down, attempting to build suspense. “Can I have a drumroll?”
Spencer immediately began tapping his fingers on the table.
You squealed. “Lucky day! Hmm, who shall I give this to…” You held the card up to your face, tapping it against your chin as though in deep thought.
Everyone started shouting names. Courtney called for Spencer. Spencer called for Angela. Angela called for Chanse. Chanse called for Spencer, too.
You shot the card across the table to Spencer, and it hit him in the face. “Oops! Sorry, I’m a bad shot,” you shrugged, knowing he wouldn’t actually care.
“I gave you a drumroll!” He yelped, incensed that you would do this to him, knowing he was one card away from being out.
“Sorry, babe, it wasn’t the right tempo.”
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
You and Spencer decided on Homestate for lunch, sitting in your car in the Smoffice parking lot, bent every which way to be comfy and facing each other in the small car.
You loved having time alone with Spencer, and you refused to think deeper into why. You weren’t that extroverted in your real life. It was easy to be extroverted on camera, especially when your best friends in the entire universe are there with you, making you double over in laughter, egging you on to take a joke further.
The past few times you’ve been one-on-one with Spencer, you had gotten a bit nervous right beforehand. You’ve never, in all your years of friendship with Spencer, felt nervous before seeing him. And you were choosing to blame one Courtney Ruth Miller for this.
“Spencer’s thirst trap edits on TikTok,” Courtney giggled.
Shayne breaks into that high-pitched laughter that only Courtney brought out of him, and Amanda was laughing in either disbelief or agreement. Actually, it was probably both.
“No, I don’t save them,” Courtney clarified. “But I send–I send them to him.” 
“Check this out, dude,” Shayne said in his frat bro voice.
“And also me, why don’t I check it out again?” Courtney laughed again.
“Also, where did I save that? Hmm…” Amanda added.
The room devolved into a fit of giggles.
Courtney left out a small part of the story. You were usually the one that sent the edits to her.
You wouldn’t say that you had a crush on Spencer. Or that you even had feelings for him that weren't platonic. But sometimes, late in bed, scrolling on TikTok, your for you page would really be for you and put a thirst trap edit of your best friend on your feed. Sometimes, once you sent a video to Court, your algorithm would pick up on it and put a bunch of edits in a row. You’d watch them all, sending half of them to Courtney, fawning over how pretty he was.
You didn’t have feelings for Spencer, you just had eyes that worked. You knew he was beautiful, with his wild, curly hair, his glasses, his humor. Everything about him was attractive to you. He was extremely funny, never took a joke too far, and respected your boundaries. These were all desirable traits, normal things to find attractive in another person.
But, when you watched that Smosh Mouth episode, and dared to look at the comments, your stomach started burning.
The spencer thirst edits is so real, courtney
I also send my friends spencer thirst edits <3
Spencer thirst trap enjoyers rise up !!
You couldn’t place the emotion that was rising inside you, swallowing you. You weren’t dumb, you knew that other people saw those edits. You once saw one with over 20k likes, clearly Spencer being attractive wasn’t a hot take. And it wasn’t – he was objectively hot in looks alone, right? But knowing him personally, well, that only endeared you to him more. 
Jealousy. You felt… jealous. You had pinpointed the emotion that was skyrocketing your body temperature, but you needed to pinpoint the reason now. Why do you feel jealous? What is there to be jealous of? He’s not yours. 
You had had a bit of an anxiety attack over it all when you woke up this morning. You let it all fade away once you got to the office, but sitting in your tiny car, cramped up next to Spencer… the confusion, the jealousy, it was all rearing its head once more.
“You good, babe?” Spencer asked, followed by a large bite of quesadilla.
For some reason, the pet name – despite its frequency in conservation with Spencer – burned you just a little more.
You moved your food to the side, no longer hungry. “Yeah, Spence. I’m okay.” But your voice was tight, and you knew it gave you away. Spencer always knew.
“Y/N, you know you’re a shit liar.” He tossed a crumpled up napkin at you, his way of encouraging you to open up. 
You let out a laugh, weakly. “Shut up.”
Spencer tapped your leg, prompting you to meet his eyes. “Hey. Please? Let me help my best friend,” he said, and the platonic tone he used made you want to shrivel up and pass away. His best friend. That was all you were, all you would ever be. You thought you had made peace with this sentiment, years and years ago. You thought this was a thing you understood, a thing that was an unspoken agreement. 
But maybe it wasn’t. “I don’t think I want to talk about it just yet. Let me process a bit more, and you’ll be the first one to know.” You held out your right pinky, silently asking for a pinky swear.
Spencer smiled, a beautiful sight in the afternoon sun, and linked his pinky with yours. You both leaned in, kissing your respective thumbs to signify the pinky swear was official. It was something you had done for so many years at this point, that the motion was entirely subconscious. 
You pulled away with more force than was necessary, but if Spencer noticed, he took mercy and he didn’t question you. “Let’s talk about you!” You blurted out, desperately trying to redirect the conversation. “How are the apps treating you?” You said ‘apps’ with a certain sense of disdain, meant to come off as a joke but coming out more truthful than you meant.
You’re not sure why this was your best choice for “redirecting the conversation”. Because whatever he was going to say wasn’t going to be any easier to hear.
“Oh, I deleted ‘em.” 
Eyes wide, you leaned forward again, your body constantly stuck in a gravitational pull towards him. “What? When? Why?”
“Who, what, when, where, why, and how?” He mocked you, and you made a big show of rolling your eyes.
“You’re so dramatic, Y/N. I love it.” He said. 
So, you did what you always did. “I might be dramatic but I’m always right.” You loved your friendship with Spencer, because he was the only one that pushed you hard enough. You loved to volley insults back and forth, and to have someone keep up with you when you’re really in the groove. Here you were, starting up your game. A back and forth of barbs with frightening frequency, always on the same page. Spencer never had a problem keeping that insane pace with you. It almost seemed like you were the one running, and he was on a leisurely stroll right behind you, never struggling to keep up with you. Always right there.
“Best friend my ass, why didn’t you tell me!” It was a rhetorical question, and you didn’t need or want an answer to it. You were afraid of what his reasoning would be. 
What if he met someone?
He didn’t seem to pick up on your internal battle. “I don’t know, we haven’t really hung out lately.” His voice was suddenly a lot lower, an air of sadness in his tone. “I feel like this is the first time I’ve had you to myself in a month.” 
Your heart skipped a beat, just for a moment, at that. You decided to push your luck.
“Had me to yourself, eh?” You winked at him, “And you say that I want to kiss you so bad.” You leaned back again, letting the space between you and Spencer return to a normal, friendly, platonic amount. 
To his credit, Spencer was usually the one that made the suggestive jokes. Then, you would shut him down immediately. You would call him disgusting, say he could only have you in his dreams, make a small dick joke, something. That was how the bit went. But you were surprised to see how dumbfounded he looked.
“Sorry I stole your bit,” you exhaled, a bit breathless at the way he was looking at you. Like you were always surprising him, and that he loved it. Like he could maybe love you.
Your phone’s alarm went off, signaling it was time to go back inside. You didn’t have another shoot today, but Spencer had a livestream. Maybe you’d sit in, but you’d more than likely go for a walk to try and get rid of this negative, nervous, jealous energy.
Spencer groaned, and you laughed. “What?”
“I just wanted more time with you is all,” he started, measuring your reaction. When you raised an eyebrow, he pushed his luck. He leaned over the console, right up to your face. Your lips were merely an inch apart, a soft, warm kiss just a small distance away. You stayed silent, and you stayed still. 
A beat.
He looked down at your lips.
Another beat.
“Wanted to see how bothered I could get you,” he whispers, and as he speaks he loses his balance for a second. Your lips brush for the quickest moment. It wasn’t a kiss, not really, just a slight touch. Lips to lips, but no pressure. No romance. 
Somehow, you both managed to keep your faces straight.
Then, Spencer pulled away, agonizingly slow, tantalizingly slow. You didn’t breathe for a moment. It felt like recess again, like you had just run around too hard for too long and now your little lungs couldn’t fill up all the way. 
You forced yourself to stay silent. He smiled again, a wickedly beautiful thing. Then he left you in your car, a raging fire fueled further with every one of his antics.
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
After three full minutes of deep breathing exercises, you finally reentered the office. As soon as the door came to a close behind you, Alex came sprinting up to you, scaring you a little with their sense of urgency.
They came to a stop right in front of you, and after doubling over trying to catch his breath, he finally spoke. “Angela got sick after lunch,” Another quick breath, “can you come do the livestream with Spencer in her place?” 
All that fucking nervous energy came flooding back in, thousandfold. Those deep breathing exercises were useless. All for naught.
Alex was desperate, and despite your current problem, you loved him. And Spencer. And Smosh. Fuck it.
“Yeah, of course I can. Is there anything planned?” You said, following behind them when they rejoiced and started heading for the stage.
They laugh, which makes you laugh, only his was genuine and yours was nervous and obvious.
“Oh, no, what?” You asked, another nervous chuckle coming out of you.
You had reached the door to the stage, and when you walked in you watched as Spencer rattled on about – you listened a bit closer – Family Guy? What the hell, sure. Alex probably told him to start the stream and keep it going while they grabbed someone to cover.
You’d like to think you were Alex’s first choice. You knew that you and Spencer had incredible chemistry on camera, which was only because you had incredible chemistry for real. There was a not insignificant amount of the fanbase that shipped you two. Sometimes, if your TikTok FYP didn’t serve you Spencer thirst traps, it served you edits of the two of you flirting. Compilation videos of moments you shared on camera would come up in your YouTube suggestions. And you watched them all. All the way to the end.
And that never really made much sense, now did it? Why watch these videos speculating on the romantic nature of the friendship you cherished so dearly? You wanted it to be just friendship. That’s what you’ve wanted for nearly ten years now.
And now, all of the sudden, it really was starting to feel like ‘friends’ wasn’t enough. Like you wanted more, and you wanted it bad.
Shit.
You walked over to the livestream setup, making a loud whooping noise to announce your arrival. “Big dick daddy’s back in town baby!” You said, for some fucking reason. While you were doing your breathing exercises in your car, you were also on Twitter. Clearly the brain rot was influencing you. Or it was the gas leak.
You went with that.
“Whoa, coming in hot, eh?” Spencer said, looking up at you while you fiddled with the headphones before sitting in the comfy little swivel chair next to him.
His eyes were full of love, but you knew that was just because you were saving his ass right now.
That was all. You couldn’t indulge yourself in the possibility of it being more. 
You just realized, as you nestled into the chair next to him, that you and Spencer hadn’t done a solo stream together yet. You were in a few of the group livestreams together, when there were four or five cast members involved. But you had yet to do one this… intimate. You shuddered mentally at that word.
“I’m here with Mr. Spencer Agnew, sir, can you tell us what we’ll be doing today?” You asked Spencer, holding your fist up like you had a microphone in. You leaned closer and shoved your hand in his face.
He laughed, and if you actually did have a mic in your hands, the audio would have peaked from the sheer sound of it. You didn’t think your bit was that funny, but you appreciated his enthusiasm.
Spencer played into all your bits. You were always thankful for that. You were never made to feel like your joke was going to bomb. He put his mouth right up close to the ‘mic’ you were holding, and he wrapped his hand around yours like he was trying to steady the ‘microphone’ himself. You threw your head back, giddy.
“Well, Mr. Big Dick Daddy, today we have a FNAF livestream! Super excited to be here, super excited that you are here, because I know how much you hate jumpscares.”
“Alex! You fuck!” You screamed in his general direction. That was why they had laughed when you asked them what was planned.
Spencer snickered, then added a dramatic gasp. “Hey! I was the one who decided that we were playing FNAF, don’t give them all the credit!”
“The only thing I’m going to give you credit for is giving me a heart murmur at such a young age, dickwad.” You crossed your arms in defiance, then bumped shoulders with Spencer to make sure he knew you were okay. “You play, please?” You asked, timid, picking up the controller. “I’ll watch. Please?”
Spencer couldn’t deny you much. He’d proven time and again that despite the way you both spoke to each other, your best friend had a soft spot for you. He gave you a reassuring smile, grabbing the controller from your hands. Just out of frame, one of his hands landed on your knee, a sign of safety, a hint of comfort. You instantly found yourself calming down, despite knowing you were about to get wrecked in the chat for your reactions to the jumpscares.
You looked over at chat for the first time since you sat down, and a blush started forming. The monitor displaying the chat was just off to your left side, and you were able to eye it surreptitiously. 
fuck they are SO cute
shayne and courtney truthers turned to spencer and y/n truthers WAKE UP!! it’s our time!!
the way she’s leaning into him goddddddddd ME AND WHO?
between the shourtney lore we’ve been getting and now these two, i’m going to explode
they act just how me and my now wife acted before we made the leap from friends to lovers. i have faith !!
The last comment stood out to you the most. So much so, that you didn’t realize you didn't answer Spencer’s question. The chat was flying, the comment you committed to memory long gone.
“Sorry, I zoned out. That Homestate was so good, I think I need a nap now.” You decided to acknowledge it while still deflecting. 
Spencer chuckled. He was swapping through the cameras in the game at warp speed, click, click, click. Click, click, click. You didn’t know how he even processed what he was looking at, or for. “You didn’t even finish it, how are you this tired?” 
“If I remember correctly, I was interrupted.” You shot a fiery look at him, pushing him. This was a livestream, nothing could just be cut out of it. He had to be careful. You wanted to see if he would be.
“You want to kiss me soooooo bad, Y/N.” To anyone else, that retort was normal. He’d said it to you on camera about a hundred times. Hell, he said it a few hours ago. But he was pushing back. Teetering dangerously on the line of caution.
You were trying to figure out if you should just push both of you over the edge, sending each other tumbling into madness. But you also wondered if you should pull him back by the sleeve of his stupid hoodie. “Maybe, maybe not,” was what you settled on. 
Chat exploded again, you could see the feed rapidly updating in your periphery. For your own sanity, you decided not to actually try and read anything being said.
“Oh, ew!” Spencer shouted. Your look of confusion, borderline a look of hurt, sends him spiraling and he hurries to explain. “You always say something mean to me when I flirt with you, I figured I’d return the favor this time.” He ended his declaration with a wink. Spencer wasn’t being mean, he was giving you a dose of your own medicine.
Fuck the cliff, fuck any sort of ground you’ve ever stood on. You were free falling, hurtling at record speed, mere moments away from going splat! all over the comically large bullseye painted below. It was the best adrenaline rush you’d ever experienced. All-encompassing, consuming, hungry.
“Ohhhh,” you said, like you just got the joke. “Okay, let’s go again. I’m ready this time!”
Spencer continued playing the game, focus never breaking because this was everyday for you. Neither of you had an on-camera persona when you were next to each other. It was just your friendship. The things you said off-camera, you said just as loud on-camera.
You watched as his thumbs flew around on the controller, flipping through the cameras, shutting the doors. No major jumpscares yet, but the knowledge that they would come was still in the back of your mind.
His hands were nice. Not too big, his fingers stopping not far above the tips of yours when you would hold your hands up to each other’s. You were both big on physical affection, so that was often. They were extremely dextrous, watching him type on a mechanical keyboard felt near-religious. The way they sped around, key-to-key, no effort needed, no concentration, no looking at the keyboard. 
He finally spoke again. “I’m waiting for you to do your line, babe.”
Spencer was on the brink of the danger zone. He didn’t call you babe on camera that often, as though he wanted to keep that for just the two of you, as often as possible. When he did, it was either a whisper – low enough the editor would have to add in an on-screen caption – or in a mocking manner like today’s Moose Master.
“Shit, sorry. Okay.” You did a few speech and breathing exercises, rapidly moving from noise to noise, just to make him laugh. “If I remember correctly, I was interrupted.”
“You want to kiss me so bad, babe. You want to kiss me so bad it makes you look stupid.”
Your head turned to him at Mach 1. Not necessarily because of his words, but because of how nonchalantly he spoke them. Like you didn’t have at least 5,000 eyes on you right now. Like you weren’t livestreaming, on the internet, for everyone and their fucking mother to see.
Like you weren’t having your heart ripped out on a live feed. 
The universe decided to throw you a bone, but it was unfortunately in the form of a jumpscare. It had you screeching, knees pulled up to your chest in your chair, both hands suddenly gripping Spencer’s hoodie. Your heart rate was through the roof, and anything you felt a minute ago was gone, replaced only with this new strain of adrenaline and a little bit of fear.
“Fuck!” You yelled one last time, your string of expletives sure to get clipped and bleeped to death for TikTok. “Sometimes I try to play this game and I remember that literal children can play this. This shit scares me at my big age, and my little cousins are telling me all about the fucking lore like it’s fun!”
“It is fun!” Spencer cut in, defending Scott Cawthon’s honor. The game was still on the ‘game over’ screen, and he was making no moves to jump back in. He wanted to make sure you were okay to continue, and you loved him more for it. He was so thoughtful, you wanted to throw up.
“No, no, the game is fun, please don’t attack me, chat!” You said through a fit of laughter. “I like the game, I promise. I can watch Spence play it, but I can’t ever play it myself because I simply freak out at everything. It’s embarrassing!”
“It’s cute.” Spencer restarted the night, since you had lightly tapped his knee to let him know you were okay to keep going. But now that he said that, you weren’t as sure. He was going to be the death of you, and he was likely going to enjoy it. Sadist.
After a few small jumpscares, another big one came in the form of Foxy. You yelped, again, shutting your eyes and grabbing onto Spencer’s hoodie for the second time in less than twenty minutes. “I told you that you would give me an irregular heart beat, but I think you just want me to die on camera.” 
“Hey,” Spencer said, voice soft and serious while not being too vulnerable. You were being watched after all. “Don’t say that.”
You kissed his cheek, deciding that nothing fucking mattered anymore. So what, you were in love with your best friend. It’s okay that he doesn’t think of you that way, because at least he’s in your life. You might as well do some fan service. Have some fun. 
“Sorry, babe.” Your head found his shoulder, curled up into him. Far too intimate for a Five Nights at Freddy’s let’s play livestream, far too intimate for ‘friends’. But Spencer just readjusted to wrap his arm around you, reuniting his hand with the controller once you wiggled around a little to get comfortable. It was a tight fit, but it wasn’t a bad one. It was comfy. You’d played video games like this with Spencer before, though usually you were in a dark living room, illuminated only by the TV screen as you watched him play Fortnite or Resident Evil or as you played Stardew co-op together. Never like this, cameras and microphones and viewers. But it felt nice, that he wanted to love you so loudly, despite you just being friends.
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
Ian called you into a meeting room two minutes after the livestream ended. Both of you, actually.
“Ian? What’s going on?” You asked, feeling panicked.
Ian sat down and let out a breath, contemplating his word choice. “Okay, so,” he paused, once again trying to figure out his wording. “So, I just have to ask, because I’m your boss, and because this is unfortunately a ‘business’ –” he added air quotes around the word ‘business’, which made you and Spencer chuckle, “Are the two of you in a relationship?”
You were genuinely too stunned to speak. You looked at Spencer, who was already looking at you. Because of course he was. Because of course Ian’s asking this question. Because why aren’t you dating? Why have you been wasting all these years as ‘just friends’ when you’ve both clearly been in love with each other this whole time? You finally broke the silence.
“Not that I’m aware of?” It was a cop out, but you needed to talk to Spencer one-on-one. This wasn’t a conversation to have in front of your boss. “You?”
Spencer slowly shook his head before looking at Ian once more. “Yeah, no, not as far as I know.”
Ian sighed. “And you would be one hundred percent honest if this changed?”
“Yes, Dad. If me and Spencer decide to start making out, we will ask for your consent first. Sorry, Dad.” You said, trying to ease the tension in the room. It was making you claustrophobic.
Thankfully, Ian and Spencer laughed. “Yeah, sorry Y/N’s Dad. We promise to ask you first. Please make sure you do not have Slack alerts silenced at any time.”
After some laughs, Ian stood back up and wrapped you and Spencer in a hug. Once he pulled back, he whispered, “Please tell me first so I can win the office bet.” And then, he was gone.
“Office bet?” You asked, turning to Spencer in confusion. 
He shrugged, “I’m not sure.”
“Okay. Well, can you come over tonight? I think I want to talk to you about that thing from earlier. I think I’ve processed enough.” You smiled at him, baiting him in.
“Well, I was supposed to hang with Alex tonight, but they’ll understand.” Spencer grabbed your hand, linking your fingers loosely. “I’ll see you tonight, babe.” 
And then you were alone.
With a lot of thinking to do.
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
You had agreed that Spencer would be at your place at 9pm. It was currently 8:45pm and you were on the verge of passing out from stress. You’d been doing laps around your apartment for an hour, and you’d never been so happy to be on the bottom floor. You cannot imagine being someone’s upstair’s neighbor right now. 
You paced once more, repeating the cycle. Kitchen, living room, bedroom, bathroom, kitchen, living room, bedroom, bathroom, on and on forever. Luckily, Spencer was always a little early. He knocked on your door at 8:50pm.
You rushed over, but waited a second before opening the door. You didn’t want to seem too eager. This likely was going to be an extremely emotional conversation. What if you came off desperate?
Once you had paused for what felt like a normal amount of time, you opened the door to Spencer’s beautiful smile. “Hey, babe,” he greeted.
“Hi.”
He nodded towards the entrance, “Can I… come in?”
Oh, right. You were still fully blocking the way. “Oh, sorry, of course!” You laughed, stepping to the side. “Entrée!” You were acting like a fool, but you were nervous as hell. You deserved some slack.
As he entered, you could tell he showered before coming over. You could smell his body wash and his cologne. And it… excited you. You loved the way he smelled, which is why you were constantly stealing his hoodies. 
You followed him through your kitchen and into your living room, sitting down next to him on the sofa. Instinctively, you curled right up to him. Though, as soon as you actually noticed this, you pulled back and put a bit of space between the two of you. You can’t be cuddling him when you’re planning to have a heavy conversation about feelings.
Spencer cleared his throat, and you finally met his eyes. “Is everything okay?” He reached a hand out, and you graciously accepted it. You needed a little grounding right now.
Without your consent, tears started pouring out of you, but you did your best to get your words out. “Yeah. Yeah, Spence, everything is okay,” you let out a laugh, and even though it sounded sad due to your state, it was a happy laugh. “Everything is great. I just, um, I just have a question. And it might be silly, but I want you to be honest.” You were thanking the universe that you got everything out without choking. Your tears were still falling, but luckily they were mostly silent.
“Of course, Y/N. What’s up? You’re starting to scare me a bit.” His thumb was rubbing at your hand, a featherlight touch that was so comforting, you could start sobbing all over again.
“Um, Spencer, are we in love?” You were sheepish, admittedly. It was a strange question to ask, and you were terrified at what his answer could be. It seemed like any answer was going to hurt, whether it was a ‘yes’ or a ‘no’.
Spencer started blushing, and sputtered a bit before saying, “Uh, are we in love? Like you and me?”
You couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re saying it like it’s impossible!” Even though that thought should hurt, a stab wound with the knife ripped out to make sure you keep bleeding, it didn’t. Because it wasn’t impossible, it was the reality, and you knew that.
“I-I mean, fuck, Y/N. Yeah, I’m definitely in love with you. I just didn’t know it was a mutual thing.” Spencer was getting teary-eyed now, and you just wanted to hold him.
So you did. You climbed into his lap, straddling him. Not in a sexual way, in a, I-need-to-be-close-to-you-right-now way. In a way that brought both of you comfort and peace. You hugged him as tight as you could. “I’m sorry, Spencer. I’m sorry it took me so long to understand.”
Spencer was hugging you just as hard, and when he laughed you felt the vibrations blossom in your chest, too. What a beautiful thing, physical touch. 
“It’s okay, babe. I was okay with waiting,” Spencer was softing running his hands through your hair now. “I knew I was going to have to wait – you’re fucking oblivious.”
You pulled back with a gasp, “Hey!”
“Baby, it’s been nearly ten years. I’ve been flirting with you excessively and loudly in videos with millions of views for years.” Spencer’s eyes were shining again, and you let yourself get lost in them for a moment. 
“I watch YouTube compilations of us flirting!” You blurted out, again, for some fucking reason. What the hell was going on with you today? 
Spencer’s laugh was boisterous, and it shook both of you. You were laughing just as hard. “Hey, I do, too. One time someone on Twitter caught me liking a fancam of us. I’m secretly very happy likes are private now.” 
“Wait, am I your girlfriend now?”
“Do you want to be my girlfriend now?”
You shook your head, “That is not how you’re asking me out, Spencer Agnew.”
He laughed, “My bad, let me start over. Y/N, baaaabe? Will you be my girlfriend? FInally? After ten agonizing years? Please?”
“Oh, my god, Spencer, that one was bad, too!” Your laughs were slightly betraying you, however.
“Baby, please, be my girl. Please?”
You broke out in a feverish blush, and put your head on his shoulder. “Yeah,” you laughed, “Yeah, I will.”
Spencer pressed a soft kiss to your head. “Sorry, what was that?”
You pulled back to look him in the eyes. You grabbed his chin with both of your hands so you could really drive your point home. “Yes, Spencer. I’ll be your girl.”
“Thank fucking god, can I kiss you now?” He was borderline panting now.
“Anytime, babe.”
And he did. He kissed you hard, and he kissed you soft. He was rough, and he was slow. He was everything, all at once, and it was dizzying and intoxicating in the best fucking way.
You weren’t sure how long you both sat there kissing, but it was well into the morning. You woke up in the middle of night, legs tangled with Spencer’s. You had both fallen asleep on your couch, and you were sprawled out across Spencer’s sleeping body. He was snoring very faintly, which was fucking adorable.
You fumbled around in the low light for your phone, checking the time. It was 2:04am. You also had a message from Ian.
I’ll have the HR forms on your desk in the morning. Love you both <3
Damn him.
You woke Spencer up after you had gotten up to pee. After a few minutes of attempting to get him to stand up, you both migrated to the bedroom. Under the covers, you both cuddled up to each other instantly. He sleepily kissed your forehead and wished you a good night. It was the most peaceful sleep of your life.
⋆。𖦹°⭒˚。⋆
When your alarm went off a mere four hours later, you both were tempted to ignore it. Unfortunately, you both had extremely busy days to tend to. You showed Spencer Ian’s text, which he laughed at. “I hate him.”
You snorted, “Same.” Despite this, you shot him a text.
I’ll bring my favorite pen to sign them with. We’ll be a little late this morning. Busy night :)
“Oh, don’t tell Ian that, please.” Spencer laid back against the pillow with his arm over his eyes, always the drama queen.
Ian’s reply came in, Please respect my boundaries of not discussing my employee’s sex lives. Love you both.
You laughed at his semi-contradiction. You won’t talk to your employees about personal shit but you’ll tell them you love them. Okay, Dad.
You then sat your phone down, and cuddled back up with Spencer. Just for another quick moment. “Five more minutes of this? Then we can get ready.”
“Yeah, I’ll steal something from cast wardrobe today. And I’m sure one of my hoodies is in your car.”
You gaped at the accusation, “Ugh! You don’t know that.”
“Y/N, I saw my grey Legacy hoodie in there yesterday.” He smiled at you, and you loved that he paid attention to you like this. You knew that that hoodie was in there. But it was in the backseat under a number of random items, because you were trying to conceal it. But he saw it anyway, because he sees you. And you were beyond thankful for that.
“Yeah, yeah.”
You both laid in silence, just breathing each other in. This was nice. You could get used to this. You were excited to have this part of Spencer, this side of him that’s just for you. The one that’s extremely soft and caring, but still extremely hilarious. The side that’s so understanding, so observant, so loving. 
Maybe loving Spencer Agnew was the greatest gift the universe ever gave you.
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d33pwithinmys0ul · 2 days ago
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୨★✧.*party 4 u ✧★.*୧
Jean Kirstein x Reader, one shot
★ recreational drug use, angst, fluff, post break up, kissing, ex boyfriend, insecurity and anxiety
Ik the song is trending but when I tell you it's been a fave with me forever.. this WIP has sat with me for a while, and I changed my mind with a lot of it but hopefully u all still like it! (If I had a nickel for every Jean fic I wrote inspired by a charlixcx song, lol) Who said you can't make corny songfic in 2025??
┈➤here's the ao3 link or read under the cut :)
Jean thought you were the most beautiful he’d ever seen. 
Silver confetti fluttered around you, the echoes of the crowd and thudding bass was overwhelming. You felt weightless and free as you danced in the darkness. The strobe lights made you see spots, highlighting the smoke that spun into the air, and for the briefest moment, everything was fine.
You couldn’t believe you almost didn’t come. 
Hitch barely managed to persuade you to skip your 8 am tomorrow, just so you could all get fucked up tonight. 
You took an Uber so none of the group would have to drive from the pregame near campus to Jean Kirschtein’s obnoxiously large house in the country.
You and Jean had a complicated history—Hitch and Annie didn’t know, because you hated the drama of it all. 
All your freshman year at Paradis State, you were inseparable in puppy love, and so unprepared for the consequences of it. You weren’t the best at expressing your feelings and boundaries, and Jean was eager to please you. It should have worked better, and you tried not to linger on that fact. He was breathtakingly handsome and had lots of friends, so it shouldn’t have been a surprise that you eventually just stopped seeing each other. 
Well, you stopped seeing him. 
You practically ghosted Jean when you found out about his weird feelings about Mikasa. You couldn’t unsee his crush whenever he was around her, and it killed you. You weren’t even angry with her for it, since Mikasa was happily infatuated with Eren, though you wished you could tell her plainly that you harbored nothing against her for it. 
You were young and emotional, and let your hurt get the better of you. It didn’t make any sense, and you didn’t even give Jean a chance to explain himself, ever. 
The aftermath was awkward considering how many mutual friends you had, so you just avoided him entirely. You started going to clubs in the next town over instead of bars and parties around campus, and you were content with the new friends you made in Annie and Hitch, despite their connections looping back to the same place. 
You supposed for as long as you lived in Trost, everyone you knew would lead you back to Jean. He was a good guy. You kind of freaked out, and got too embarrassed and proud to go back to him and apologize. 
“C’mon man, are you gonna try to enjoy yourself?” Connie gave him a light punch on the shoulder. 
“I am,” Jean said, irritated, and glanced outside again. “Are you sure she’s coming?”
He had spent the first hour of the evening hovering by the windows. They were tall and wide, so he would have seen you perfectly from the other end of the room, but as soon as he heard that you were coming, he was a wreck. 
He insisted on picking out the decorations instead of letting Sasha take the lead, like she usually did. He couldn’t help himself from the excitement that blossomed in his chest at the idea of seeing you, really seeing you. 
As the others around him began pregaming, Jean really drank. 
He didn’t want to get his hopes up, but he couldn’t help it. His heart raced all evening, resounding all his longing, begging, willing you through that door. Come to my party. Come to my party.
Jean felt like he was always catching glimpses of you, and no matter how hard he tried to move on, the way you seemed to, there was always a remaining trace of bitterness. You were barely there, yet not close enough for him to properly ignore the way you made him feel.
It was years ago, and should mean nothing. It meant nothing. 
“Look man,” Connie put his hand on Jean’s shoulder, his breath fanning the scent of beer over to his friend. “Just relax! Either y’talk to her, or you don’t. I don’t think you should waste your night being emo about it. Make a decision. Do something instead of moping around.”
Jean shoved his hand away, a little harsher than he intended to. He couldn’t gauge his own strength—or temper–when he got drunk like this. 
“Yeah, I know.”
By the time you arrived at the sizable mansion, up a long winding driveway lined with trees, you were so high, you didn’t give Jean a second thought. 
You walked in with the girls, immediately enamored with the superfluous decorations, the colorful, ambient lighting, and the blasting music. Balloons hung from the ceiling and littered the floor, and it seemed like over a hundred people were crammed into every crevice of the house. 
“What the hell is this party for again?” You yelled to Hitch, despite her face only being a few inches from yours. Her eyes were hazy and distant, as she’d shared some molly with you earlier, the dose she took was far more. 
“Uhh, I think Jean said he just needed a pick me up for the new semester,” she shouted back and slipped her sunglasses over her eyes. “I think it’s pretty.”
“I’m getting jungle juice,” Annie said boredly. She’d taken more shots than any of you, and remained composed like it was nothing. “Come with?” 
Hitch nodded. 
“Y/n? You rolling?” 
“Not yet. I’ll catch up with you in a bit,” you shook your head and gave them an encouraging smile.
“Fine, but if I leave here alone, I’m killing you both,” she stuck her tongue out at you playfully, and gripped Annie’s arm as they went off. 
You smiled and decided to occupy yourself by weaving through the crowd, people watching. 
There were people taking shots, legs in tall boots and short skirts, groups smoking cigs and rolling up by the staircase. A throng of people surrounded the DJ on the raised platform by the living room. 
Your senses were pleasantly heightened, you felt warm and light. The mixture of drugs kept you at ease, though a part of you ached, and seemed to search for a certain familiar face.
You pushed away the thought and made your way across the floor. 
You saw Historia posing as her girlfriend took photos of her, the flash briefly blinding you as you stumbled past. You waved at Connie and Sasha, the former shotgunning a beer as his friend timed him. It was always nice seeing them. 
“Hey Y/n!”
You turned to find a buzzed, cheerful Marco, with a solo cup in hand, and he leaned in for a hug. 
“Hey!” You said, surprised, and squeezed him tight. 
You liked Marco a lot, and despite being Jean’s best friend, he was one of the kindest people to you throughout the past few years.
“I’m great, did you just get here?” He asked. 
“Yeah. Looks like you guys went all out,” you grinned and gestured at the crowded room. If it wasn’t silver or gold, it was sparkling or glowing. 
“It was all Jean’s idea,” Marco rubbed the back of his neck, stumbling over his words. “I dunno. He’s uh– excited. Probably on a second bottle by now.” 
“Oh,” your eyebrows betrayed your concern. “Um, is he alright?”
“It doesn’t seem fair to… sorry, I shouldn’t have said anything,” Marco was pink from the alcohol, and seemed to turn a little redder. “You should enjoy yourself!”
“Well, where is he?” Your eyebrows pinched together. 
The temptation was killing you. Was Marco trying to say that Jean wanted to talk to you? Why else would he suggest it?
“Um, outside, I think,” he gave you an apologetic smile. “Really, he’ll be okay. You should enjoy your night. He sent me away to enjoy mine.”
You swallowed and watched him disappear into the crowd. 
You were fucking out of it. Maybe any mistakes you made tonight could be reasonably excused. Besides, you were friends with Jean long before you fucked things up. 
You made your way through the sea of people and to the back door, an angelic synth swimming in your ears. 
You stepped outside, and shivered from the biting February breeze. 
The pool shone blue in the night, casting a glow that shimmered and shook with the water. It was quieter in the backyard, the thudding music and chatter was muffled and seemed worlds away. 
You braced yourself to see Jean around the corner, or on a chair, but you were completely alone. 
Your head was pounding from the powerful speakers. You took a deep, shuddering breath, allowing yourself to feel. Maybe you shouldn’t have gotten so fucked up, knowing that Jean would be here. You kind of walked into this. Yet, you think you might’ve felt the same sober. That was sadder. At least with this, you could blame it on the drugs. 
Fuck. You couldn’t let yourself spiral and lose it. You felt like shit ruining girl’s nights like this, even if Hitch and Annie were preoccupied elsewhere. 
You sank to your knees by the pool, and took off your heels. You dipped your feet in the water, grateful for the cold, tranquil distraction. You closed your eyes, and took deep breaths. With the muffled crowd and the occasional car passing in the street, the moment felt a little more real. 
Jean was always good at helping you calm down. When you managed to convey the times you were overwhelmed, he was a saint, rubbing your back and keeping you hydrated when you got too high or anxious. 
Tears leaked down your face before you could stop them. You didn’t want to ruin your makeup, after using so much glitter, but your cheeks were wet and your vision blurred. You hadn’t thought about this, or him, in years. 
Did you overreact? You let your jealousy get to the better of you. God, you sucked. Maybe you should have stayed home. Maybe it’s just been too long, or you were high, and lonely, but the idea of Jean holding you close now made your heart ache. 
You heard the back door slide open, spilling more heavenly electronic music into the air until it shut again. 
“Hey.” A familiar voice called your name, nearly cracking. 
“Hey,” you said, hastily wiping your face, staring straight ahead at the water. “Are you alright?”
“I think I should be asking you,” Jean slurred and sat down on the pavement. He had a bottle in his hand, and wore a button down with the sleeves rolled up, his hair tousled and sticking slightly to his forehead from sweat. His legs were crossed, and he leaned down while he spoke, his posture ruined in favor of staying at your eye level. “I di–um..” He cleared his throat. “I didn’t think you’d come.”
“Seemed like fun,” you laughed, despite the salty taste in your mouth. “It’s all beautiful, Jean. You always throw one hell of a party.”
His eyes were pained, and it sent a stabbing sensation to your chest. 
“Thanks.” He seemed very tempted to say more, but instead took a swig and passed you the bottle. 
“No I’m good, I’m rolling,” you pushed it back to him. 
“Oh,” he said, surprised. “Any.. particular occasion?”
You shrugged. 
“Hitch offered.” You tried not to read too much into his question. You rolled very rarely—partying was always magnified by a little molly every now and then. You likely flattered yourself too much as you wondered if he was thinking you came out tonight to fuck someone, with its reputation as a sex drug. 
“Sounds fun,” he said, jaw tight. “So… why are you out here?”
“Marco kind of sent me,” you laughed. “Obviously, I was too late. Thought you’d be somewhere else by now, and the pool’s nice.”
“Well, here I am,” he said bitterly. He swept a hand through his hair, pushing it away from his eyes and ruining the near-perfect coif. You liked it better that way, messy and long, you didn’t think the perfectly combed look really fit him. 
“How–how are you?” You said lightly. His lashes were so long, perfectly framing his sad eyes, brushing his cheek with every blink. 
“Second semester always sucks,” he shrugged and took another swig. “Thought something extravagant would lighten everyone’s spirits.”
“Yeah,” you exhaled and laughed nervously. You were chewing your lip as you kicked your leg gently against the water, watching the small droplets flick away from you.  “I think it was a great idea. And it’s stunning– inside, by the way. It’s gorgeous.”
There was a trace of a smile on his lips from your compliment. He couldn’t make himself say that it was really all for you. 
Your features were glowing from the light refracting off of the pool, your short dress rode up your thighs, and Jean couldn’t help but stare. He wondered if you sensed it too, the tension—not from the awful history, or the unsaid professions, but the near tangible desire.  
“I’m glad you made it,” he said softly. “It’s really nice to see you.”
“Of course,” you said quickly. You averted your eyes, your hands in your lap. 
The drugs were heightening all your emotions, and all your senses—the tinge of chlorine in the air, mixing with Jean’s familiar scent, the faint thudding of music from inside the house, the cool water against your skin. 
“Um,” your breath was shaky, your hands clenched into fists. “I’m sorry, by the way. A-about freshman year.” You nearly choked on the words as they bubbled out of you. “It’s—I was really dumb and jealous. You’re a great guy, Jean. You’re an amazing, sweet, romantic son of a bitch. You deserve the world.”
You tried not to stare, but it wasn’t like he was returning the favor. You were both shamelessly memorizing each other's features, a mingling of fear, apprehension, and desperation. You felt so wretched, to pretend like he was someone you never loved. 
“Do you wanna dance?” Jean said pathetically. It was all he could manage, despite everything he wanted to say. 
You blushed and tried not to smile too hard. That was more than enough for you. 
“Yeah, I’d like that.”
You ignored the tossing in your stomach as Jean held the door open, leaking sound and smoke into the air before sliding it shut. 
It was a small, guilty pleasure, feeling him guide you through the mass of people, dancing, thrashing bodies and balloons. 
You found a small opening, nearly thrown together from the crowd. 
You spent the night with your arms at Jean’s shoulders, and his hands at your waist. The strobe lights nearly blinded you, but you couldn’t look away from him. The adoration in his eyes, the curve of his lips. Maybe he was thinking the same thing, that you were both ridiculous, cowardly idiots. Maybe you were just delusional. 
You couldn’t stop yourself when you leaned into him, taking in his scent, yearning to feel his heartbeat, as if you were the only people in the room. It was like time stopped and everyone else faded away when he closed the space between you, his lips warm and rough and they met yours, finally reuniting after all the heartache. 
Jean tasted like home. His hands roamed your body, through your hair, and you clung to him, kissing him and forsaking your breath. It all felt so good, so right.
“Oh my god,” Jean groaned, thrilled by the taste of you, the way you felt against him and in his hands. He tried to be gentler, but he was too excited by your shallow breaths, your impossibly soft skin, your moans urging him to be more and more indecent. 
You nearly stumbled, getting shoulder checked from a nearby dancer, and your tall heels failing you. Jean’s grip at your waist was firm, and he led you to the corner and pinned you against the wall. He kissed you until you gasped for air.
“Uh, should we do something?” Sasha nudged Connie with her elbow as she spotted you both from a distance, making out passionately, for all to see. 
“Are you kidding?” Connie snorted. “They need that shit. I’ll find them an empty closet myself.”
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whoopsyeahokay · 3 days ago
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Alphabet Soup
summary: prompt fill. the journey of a clandestine love affair at several stages because Wally Clark craves what he can't have and refuses to keep his hands to himself. and you live for it.
pairing: grey!Wally Clark x fem!reader
warnings: smut. AU - modern setting. romanticized toxic behavior. cheating. caught in the act. egregious use of the word 'baby'.
bon reading, frens
___________________________🧿
Alphabet Soup - U
U is for uh-oh, oops, and oh no. Even if it isn't Wally's fault, having become more and more unhinged as things between you and him unfold into something so perfect and permanent, Wally thinks he's died and gone to heaven.
He's caught with his head buried between your thighs, his chin and mouth shiny with your juices. He licks his lips, unbothered, raises a brow at Janet as she stands there wearing the ugliest scowl Wally has ever seen on her face, her body vibrating with unfettered rage. He sits back, naked and on display, lazily stroking his cock with pride in his eyes.
"Get out," He tells her calmly, and she closes door behind her because what the fuck else is she going to do? Watch? Wally slants his head toward you, smirking, crawling up your body to kiss you with unbridled passion, grinding his cock between your wet folds to coax you back into the right headspace. "Don't worry, baby," He coos, "She's gone." Since you can't see from under the blindfold, your wrists bound to his headboard.
You whimper, clearly unnerved by Janet's intrusion despite not having seen or heard her, the bitch wielding feline grace when it suits her. She isn't supposed to be at Wally's house, in his apartment above his family's garage. Janet was in the throes of organizing prom with the rest of the committee and wasn't due to meet him until tomorrow morning for another rundown of their court dance. Smile, wave, make a dumb speech thanking everyone for their votes. Blah blah blah, Wally doesn't care.
He's been on her shitlist since last week, anyway, so what's another nail in the coffin? He actually feels relieved that Janet discovered you and him. It gets him hotter, harder, more desperate for you, because now he isn't shackled to late nights and impromptu weekends alone. Wally can have you whenever he fucking wants. Which has steadily turned into always over the course of the year.
And, wow, has it really been that long?
He knows Janet hasn't left, doesn't hear her car pull out of the drive, so he greedily, selfishly, shamelessly eats your cunt like a Michelin Star meal. Tongue probing your pussy as he moans at how good you taste, his eyes rolling back in his head from it, and the whole time you're keening and crying out and begging him not to stop, oh fuck Wally, I'm so close, please please. Don't worry, baby, he loves this probably more than you do.
When you come, shouting his name for Janet to hear what she never had a chance in hell to get from him, Wally fucks you like reckoning. Paints your chest and belly like a Jackson Pollock before he releases your wrists and soothes you with affection. As you doze, he tucks you in, kisses your hair, vows to be back in five minutes. Dons a pair of low-slung sweats and a smug grin as he lopes out of the room, down the stairs, and meets Janet outside the door.
"Something I can do for you?" He asks, obviously unruffled which just drives Janet fucking nuts.
She wants an apology.
Wally laughs in her face, "For what? It's not like I'm really cheating on you."
She wants an explanation.
Wally snorts, "I don't owe you shit." He doesn't. Janet was never his girlfriend. She was never anything. A pest at most, an inconvenience at least.
"You don't get to have her." Janet seethes as if she has some kind of say in it.
Again, Wally laughs, shakes his head, tells her where to go as impolitely as he can. "She's already mine," He states, breezy, sucking the fingers he fucked you with to stress the point. Janet has a prima donna meltdown right there on his parents' lawn, stomps her foot and positions herself to slap him. He catches her wrist easily, stares her dead in the eyes, "You jealous, Janet?"
He fondles himself, pushes her arm away and grins, "Is this what you wanted?" Then he glances to his window, slides his gaze back to her, chuckling darkly, "Or is it her?" She doesn't answer, her face flaming, brows knitted, jaw clenched, "Is that why you wanted me to stay away from her? Because you wanted her all to yourself?"
"Shut the fuck up, Clark," Janet growls.
Wally knows it's not true; he's merely enjoying himself. He knows that Janet is actually just jealous of you, not because she wants to be with you but because she wants to be you. It's been obvious since Day One of their stupid arrangement. Everything Janet did was an underhanded plot to shrink you down as small as Janet feels.
"I'll show her the video." Janet threatens, voice full of umbrage. "She'll never look at you again."
In an instant, Wally's in her space, fire in his eyes, "I fucking dare you."
He hasn't exactly planned for this, but he's tired of worrying about it. If you walk away, you walk away—Wally's heart stutters—at least he has enough spank bank material to last decades. A blessing since he doesn't think he could get it up for anyone else ever. Thank Christ he saved every picture and video and voice note you've ever sent him.
"I'll make sure you lose Prom King," Janet sneers and, again, he snorts.
"I don't think I could care less," and, taking stock of himself, Wally finds that to be true. "It's just high school, Janet. Get a fucking hobby."
He hears the stairs creak, your honeyed voice from behind him wondering, "What's going on?" and he turns and saunters toward you without a second thought, bundles you into his arms, reveling at how you drown in his football jersey.
"You should go back inside, baby," He says even as he kisses you, soft, warm; hands groping your ass through the polyester. "Don't want my neighbors getting a peek at what's mine," he pecks the tip of your nose and gives you a humble smile that still feels a bit unnatural on his face.
It's then that Janet does the dumbest thing she could think of. She lunges at you while you're still in Wally's arms. A rapid badger fueled by envy. Wally pivots you to safety, blocks Janet's feeble attempts to get at you with his body. She loses steam pretty quickly when Wally doesn't budge.
Janet drives into the sunset with a promise to rat you out. To your mama first and then your dad. You look confused, "Why should I care?" You ask her retreating back, inviting her to go ahead because you've wanted everything out in the open since you and Wally started fucking that fateful afternoon after Janet's pool party.
Later, between dinner with his parents and Avengers: Infinity War on the projector in his apartment, Wally feels a weight lift off his shoulders. No more Janet. No more sneaking around. No more yearning and missed opportunities and bullshit. Just you. Just him. Together for real.
He combs his fingers through your hair as you lounge, draped along his front between his legs, head on his chest, breathing deep in sleep, and Wally realizes for the first time that, despite being free to do whatever he wants now, he still chooses you.
What the hell have you done to me, baby?
Still, his arms tighten around you and he doesn't let you go until it's time to get ready for school.
🧿___________________________
MASTERLIST
also available on AO3!
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eraserbread · 1 day ago
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more older married!satosugu since u guys seem to like it lol. part 1 ,part 3
it's hard to explain, but they're just on the same wavelength. older married!satosugu will do absolutely anything for you, no matter the burden. like clockwork, they tick for you.
it'll be right on the ten-minute mark when their familiar black sedan rolls in front of a row of apartments. you've been standing in the same spot, just like gojo asked when you called him for help. as you walk forward, their dark-tinted windows make it impossible to see inside until the passenger slowly begins descending.
it's so fucking embarrasing and you'd never admit it, but seeing them again like this makes you whine.
suguru, bedhead everywhere, still smiling so sweet with satoru's long ass hand on the top of his thigh. aching for attention always, satoru leans past his husband's figure, beaming an 'i'm so happy to see you' type of smile. you wish you could see his equally as expressive eyes, but they're covered behind expensive sunglasses. he must have had an exhausting day to keep them on at night.
"hello, dear!"
"you look absolutely freezing, get in." for once, satoru's being the strict one, but he can't hide the excitement in his voice when he sees you again. its been days since you three have been together. unfortunately, it'd have to be in the dead of night.
"both of you didn't have to come." you drag, unlocking the back passenger door and slipping inside the warm car. It's always so clean in here, it amazes you.
"c'mon." satoru peeks over at you through the rearview, finally pulling his glasses just enough for you to see the shadow of blue under his light, long eyelashes. "you know who you're talking to, right?"
which is why it's no fucking surprise when satoru ends that night with your back on his chest, knees pressed to your shoulders and falling the fuck apart on suguru's cock.
his name is on your lips -- yours on his, suguru's on yours. it's a filthy mess of sex-stained endearances, breathing life into your very soul.
"say it." satoru growls in your ear, wound extra tight from being confined to his grey sweatpants. he feels it, though - every thrust, like he's inside of you. he wants to be inside of you "fucking, say it. whose the one fucking you, hm?"
he knows how you get when you're like this -- so slurred and frazzled that words just don't compute the way he needs him to. talking is always the most important thing for them, so they end up drifting into each other.
"s-su-g...uru get-o,"
"well, kinda." satoru's teeth graw at the shell of your ear, hungry for something else with the feeling of you grinding on his erection. "'s my fucking pretty ass husband."
"gojo, stop." geto's beaming like a prize as the sun rises through the bedroom windows. wet hair sticking to his back and pajama pants still hanging on his right ankle.
except, gojo continues. he digs harder, chewing on a mouthful of your hair as he speaks. "my geto-chan, suguuuu, my baby. our baby."
"mmh, okay. okay -- i get it."
"say it. 's your sugu... geto-kun - fuck me, geto-kun."
gojo's fingers are pressing your tongue, so all you can do is moan dumbly against the slim digits. either way, it drives suguru crazy.
you look up and feel the look in his eyes, one so hungry and vibrant as he stares between the two of you. everything's wet -- everyone's a sticky mess, but he still leans down and kisses you through his orgasm.
"told you to stop or you'll make me cum." suguru's eerily competent for just plugging you full it. he trails messy lips from sucking gojo's face to kissing and biting all over yours.
it's usually how this goes, you end up remembering one sexual encounter more than the other. when you told them this, they were more than happy to switch places each time.
since satoru went first, suguru gets to go first this time.
somehow easing his sweats off his waist in your sex-fueled haze, he slips inside of your messy cunt. you're too fucked to moan, so you whimper when you finally cum.
"...so fulla shit.." satoru moans in your ear, gagging you deeper on his fingers. on top, geto reaches to wipe sweat from his brow, shaking his head because he knows what satoru is about to say.
"you said gojo stop." satoru mocks, kissing your cheek as he pulls his fingers from your slack lips. "now, don't you say that, darling. gojo's just getting started."
"she hates your stupid jokes, 'toru..."
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ella8rikii · 3 days ago
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I wrote you a note, but I didn’t send it
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Synopsis : Jungwon comes home from work to find an poem on the table, that you wrote.
Warnings : teary eyes, kissing, skinship, both of you guys are softy’s, nicknames, (let me know if I missed anything)
This is actually a poem I wrote for school about my dad:( so please do not copy it :)
Yang Jungwon walks through the door, tired after a long day at work. “Baby I’m home” his voice rings through the quiet apartment not getting a reply. He looks for you throughout the whole apartment but can’t seem to find you.
He decides to check your location, and he sees that you have gone to the supermarket.
Hes exhausted after a long practice and can’t wait to get to cuddle you and spend time with you. Missing you was an understatement.
He walks into the bedroom for a change of clothes and picks up a grey hoodie and black sweat pants. He changed and looked at the time “5:51” she should be getting home soon he thought.
As he was walking out of the room he saw a note on your vanity. Out of curiosity he went and picked it up. Jungwon looked at the note confused, it was a poem, u didn’t usually write poems but he decided to read it. On the note it read:
“Are you there?”
“I sat in the cold room, I felt you were there. I asked why you left. And answers I looked for.
I looked at the stars in the sky, And hoped you were there. That you could see me and make me feel better, But you’re no longer there.
But you were always here In my mind, in my heart, I will never forget you, even though you are gone.
You kissed me good night, And under the covers I crawled. But that was the last time I saw you. Oh how I wish you were still there.”
Y/n.
Jungwon’s heart stung reading the poem, it had a deep meaning. He felt his eyes tear up, and his cheeks getting red.
“Hey handsome” a voice suddenly says. Jungwon spins around quickly and sees you. You notice the tears in his eyes immediately. “Oh no, Wonie did you have s hard day at work?” Your voice was like an angel.
Jungwon was silent, looked down then held up the note. “Did you write this?” He asks voice cracking slightly. “Where did you get that?” Your voice was stern but soft. “It was on the desk, I saw it and read it. It’s beautiful, I didn’t know you were such a good writer” he truly means what he’s saying.
You pull him into a hug, you arms wrapping around his neck while his hands hold your waist tight, like he was afraid you’d let go, disappear. “Thank you, that means a lot” you say softly placing a tender kiss on his neck.
“My baby should be a writer” he says jokingly but also serious at the same time. You giggle at his comment “I am very happy with the work I do at the moment but thanks” you laugh.
He pulls away and leans in, lips inches away from yours, “I won’t kiss you unless you allow me to brag about this to everyone” his eyes are locked in with yours “you would have anyways” you chuckle. “True” is all he says before kissing you.
Here it is, kinda short~~ I’ve been on the worst writers block.. Let me know if you guys have any requests or ideass!!
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svnnnne · 2 years ago
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joker love week 2023: lipstick
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yuwuta · 10 months ago
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you ask yuuta if he wants a bite of your food and when he says yes you offer your plate to him, but he’s just sat there looking at you with his dumb big bambi boy eyes and his mouth slightly open and he will not look away or blink or close his mouth until you lift your fork to his lips to feed him and then he grins like shit’s sweet and hums about how good the food is like nothing happened like he’s not ridiculously attractive. gonna chew on steel
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wiklm · 8 months ago
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worlds worst polycule
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24601orwhatever · 9 months ago
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KYLE ADAMS as GRANTAIRE
mastered by @bikinibottomdayz
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choccy-milky · 9 months ago
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Might I suggest…
Sebby in a maid outfit? 🤔🥵
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the scenario is that their class/year is doing a maid cafe (for some reason) and if any dudes from other classes come by to try and see clora in her maid outfit / request she serve them food, seb gets in the way✋✋ LOL
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theloveinc · 9 months ago
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Togame Jo’s greeting kisses to you are always way too long.
The kind of affection that’s usually savored in private, instead displayed wherever, whenever, and every single time you see each other—he always takes two to three minutes just to kiss you hello, abandoning the task at hand (dozing off, attending to Choji, managing the Shishitoren) to mosey your way and pull your lips to his in something just a little too sloppy to be sweet, but a little too sweet to be… too distasteful.
Everyone’s used to it by now, even Sakura, knowing that when you arrive, there’s always a going to be a pause in action just for the sappy display of Togame drooping over you and announcing you to the crowd physically.
(What’s not readily exposed, however, and especially not in a room full of men, is that it’s not just a kiss Togame’s giving you, not just a hello that he hides behind his long bangs and your cheeks between his warm hands, but the kindest stare and sweetest little whisper, “missed you, baby,” as he wraps you up in his arms.)
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theythemmer · 1 month ago
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who up thinking abt the implications of dnp being controlled by and sacrificing themselves for demons
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