#tw toxic shame

[linked-maze]

Your Links having the same issues as you sounds super interesting. What are some of the things you struggle with? If you don't mind me asking?

this is such an old ask- im so sorry for never answering- anyway this is gonna be a very personal answer- so for the people who don't care about this and are only here for the comic, so sorry, and plz ignore XD so some of the things I struggle with are: Toxic shame. People who often feel like they're not good enough and are ashamed of themselves and it curses them to self-sabotaging behaviors. Anxious attachment style. People with anxious attachment styles struggle to feel secure in their friendships and relationships. While they long to feel close to their friends and partners, this need is often driven by fears of abandonment, mistrust, and low self-esteem. Autism. I don't wanna go too deep into this one since it's such a broad one and I'm still not educated enough in my opinion. Dyscalculia. is a learning disability that inhibits a person's ability to use and have a proper sense of numbers. and it also affects my way of direction at times. I might have more but those are the ones I struggle with every single day- I'm 23 years old and don't have any exams yet- so I'm still in school but in special classes for people with some type of disability and learning difficulties. I have put some of the issues I struggle with onto some of the Links in my comic- and also some other stuff that I have tried educating myself on to try and put some more representation out there! ^w^

[suddenly-frankenstein]

cat dead, details later

(oh hey is this my every year's toxic-green-gremlin acrylic fanart? woaaah? there are 2023 and 2022 btw)

[traumatizedjaguar]

Something was broken from the start.

[furiousgoldfish]

You get born in this world and right off the bat you're taught you exist to please your parents, and you will in fact, be punished if you don't please your parents. And you don't even know what this means, all you know is that if those people abandon you, you die (they don't tell you about human rights). So you please them and it's never enough and you always get punished regardless of how hard you try and you feel like a failure and like it's your fault that you're not good enough to deserve to be alive.

And then when you reach out beyond your parents and try to feel out what is true, the society comes back at you with 'If you feel anything else but overwhelming gratitude and love for your parents then you are a selfish and unkind person' and it messed you up! Because you did once love them, and they did so much, for so long, in order to destroy that love within you, they forced you to live with survival instincts only, they made your world into nothing but hatred and injustice, and you can't love what has been trying to kill you and made you suicidal.

And by then the entire conversation about the abuse they inflicted on you got side-tracked and you spent the entire thing again, analyzing why you're not good enough, why you don't feel how it's socially acceptable to feel, what you need to change in yourself and examine in your own feelings, and all that time the abuse goes unchallenged, unacknowledged, unpunished. You just live with the consequences all your life, always pushed to examine yourself more when you want to bring it up.

[shalom-iamcominghome]

So, I've been a bit open about my mental health on here since it affects how I experience and interact with judaism, but I'm wondering how you all balance it? I've found that antisemitism does not specifically cause the recent episode/s I have been having, but it makes them worse, and I find that it makes it even harder to engage with judaism, so I'm currently in a Sisyphean spiral. I guess for me, my brain has been so high-alert about this stuff that it completely shuts down, but not engaging with my jewish community is just as detrimental to my health as antisemitism is. Plus, I'm just angry at the thought that something like antisemitism would prevent me from being with my community.

[helaenadream]

sometimes I come close to knowing peace and then I remember lancelot died by suicide twice. like wow what is it about the inherent erotic pull between that sad knight and a noose

[slaughterlocked]

can you hear me? / from jules! it's worried wife hours 😭

THEIR PRIOR ARGUMENT HAS LONG SINCE FADED TO A DULL IMPRINT AT THE BACK OF HIS MIND. That doesn’t mean he’s above taking impromptu naps in his study; giving Jules and himself some space after the heated words they’d exchanged barely forty eight hours ago. Is it childish, to semi - avoid his wife instead of trying to resolve their issues ? William doesn’t think so. He chooses instead to view it as the decent thing to do. Offer space, time for reflection. They can both have tempers, sometimes. Him more than anyone. Better to cool off than spark the fire again.

But he’s fuzzy - minded when Jules wakes him now, furrowing his brow as if it helps him recall better. “ What— ” He begins, and then grunts. There’s a crick in his neck, and his lower back aches from being slouched over his desk. It’s not often he has a deep sleep, but William never enjoys the aftermath ( especially not when it’s in his study ). “ Oh. Jules. ”

At least her name leaves his lips softly. He’s been struggling to even do that, these days. William stretches, stifles a yawn, and finally squints up at his wife. The lamp at his desk burns bright, but the rest of the room is cluttered with shadows and darkness. Hard to see her face. Is she still upset with him ? “ I didn’t mean to fall asleep. ” William says, unsure whether or not he needs to be defensive. Hard not to feel like he’s been cornered, even though nobody has backed him into one. “ ——— What’s the time ? ”

[jokerislandgirl32]

Zach: “Don’t You Ever Call Her That…”

TW for mentions of Toxic/Abusive Relationships! TW for discussion of sl*t shaming!

So, I’ve hinted at it, but I haven’t publicly announced it I don’t think….but….Before Violet and Zach start dating, Violet was in a toxic/abusive relationship with a creep she went to high school and college with named Travis Carter.

Violet started dating Travis after she found out Zach was in a relationship shortly after she and Zach shared their first kiss. Violet was devastated, and she was convinced Zach hated her and wanted nothing more than to forget her, so Violet tried to do the same. Travis had been obsessed with Violet for years, constantly asking her out and flirting with her even when she told him it made her uncomfortable (it got to the point it was near stalking).

Even though Violet wasn’t comfortable with him, she knew he liked her and convinced herself he was her only option. The only guy who would love her and the only way she’d forget about Zach. So, when Travis showed up in her first college class (and all of them for that matter), she allowed him to sit with her, and when he asked her out a few days into the fall semester, she agreed.

Violet soon realized this was a grave mistake as he tormented her in every way imaginable (he was awful….they had a toxic/abusive relationship for a reason, but I’ll get to all of that in later posts/fics), but he was particularly vile when it came to Zach.

More below cut!

Travis knew how she really felt about Zach (that she loved him), and Travis tormented her because of this fact, regardless of her faithfulness to him. Prior to their breakup and after their breakup, which occurred in tandem with a nasty confrontation between Zach, Travis, and an army of Zachbots, Travis essentially sl*t shames her.

This resulted in many of Travis’s friends and Violet’s old classmates also accusing her of being unfaithful. Violet listened to these insults knowing they were untrue, hoping that one day she’d be with Zach, and as long as they are together she’d take the insults because in the end it would all be worth it.

After the relationship with Travis ends, she still hears the accusations, but she deals with them as best as she can. Then she starts dating Zach, and let’s just say he doesn’t take kindly to people calling his Vi anything less than perfect. Let’s just say Zach overhears someone call her this…the Zachbots are assembled… and it’s game over…

A Hateful Onlooker (aka Travis’s mom) gets up in Violet’s face after seeing Vi and Zach out one day: “How dare you walk around with him. You should be ashamed of yourself! After what you did to my son! You ruined his life, you ruined his reputation! All because you wanted to get with some other guy! I can’t believe you’d even show your face around here with him, you lying little sl*t…”

Zach, seething with rage, pulling Violet behind him, and calling the Zachbots to him: “Don’t you ever call her that…”

Therefore, Taylor Swift’s song “Sl*t!” is very fitting for Zach and Violet as she faces inaccurate accusations and Zach’s the one who’s there to quell her fears and let her know she absolutely is not anything less than perfect to him 💜.

“And I break down, then he's pullin' me in… In a world of boys, he's a gentleman…”

I’m going to be posting more about this side of Zach and Violet’s relationship/ Violet’s past in the near future (maybe today, we’ll see!). I’ll strive to lable every tw appropriately! If you have any questions in the meantime feel free to ask.

[iwanttobekidnappedandtakenaway]

I want to be so skinny that my bones fracture and break from one single touch.

I wish I had an eating disorder so bad rn.

[minxthenymph]

A short fat store lady body shamed me (???)

[creatur3-featur3]

Dont you love it when your mom shows your sister your school picture and your sister says: 'omg [deadname] finally learned how to smile'??

And she fatshames me and makes fun of me for not being socially active, then gets mad when i tell her to leave me tf alone.

I love life :) /j

[nikki-smurfling]

People who find it disgusting need to learn that people who have them are normal and it should be treated with respect because it causes immense pain and sometimes dysphoria so bad that the reciever wants to bleed in other places.

People who find it disgusting need to ask themselves if it's because it's something they don't experience or if it's because it's blood. If it's because it's blood then maybe it's not the period itself.

I'm a man who experiences the pain. I find it disgusting and have been terrified to talk about it out of dysphoric fear and out of being literally raised to think periods are a sin.

They are not. They are natural.

Women who have periods, you are queens and rule the world because you live through that pain and that shame once a month

Men who have periods, you are kings and rule right beside those women because you not only live through the pain and shame but the self-shame too. That goes to every other gender out there. We who bleed are the gods of this world.

[bibliomementomori]

TW for white supremacy and black dehumanisation

I wanna start by saying i'm a white trans man, i don't really care about passing, i love critical philosophy, and i have a lot of opinions about transandrophobia, but this post isnt about any of that. I wanted to say that because of those things, i've been studying socialisation theory and how it impacts me, which made me think about how, in what way, i've been socialised to harm other people.

Always asking yourself what actions you do, that have been normalised to you, might be harming POC is a necessity. Doing this has made me realise, in my predominantly white staffed schools growing up, despite the amount of POC peers i have, i find it uncommon in myself to instinctively refer to black men or women of authority over me, or whom are my elders, as "ma'am" or "sir", as i refer to my white elders. I realise that no one around me had, as black figures of authority were virtually non existant.

I never thought myself to be actively racist, but realisations like these really do point to the existence of socialisation theory. I was never socialised around black authority figures due to my places i'd frequently be in having an almost entirely white staff body, and even combined with the most "one off" racist jokes i might hear from racist family or racist peers, that was enough for my white childhood brain to never recognise black people as deserving of the same respect.

Socialisation theory is real, and while it takes decades to unlearn, maybe you'll never truly unlearn it entirely, looking inwards and trying to improve yourself is an effort that can save pain and save lives.

[slaughterlocked]

i know things have been really tough lately, but i want to work things out. / hi have random angst from jules bc listen !!!!!!!!

HE HAS TO LAUGH. OH, JULES, FOREVER THE OPTIMIST. It's not a nice sound he greets her with, but the harsh short scoff of a man who feels he's lost the world he had ( forgetting, of course, that he's still got her, and them, and that life goes on ). " Don't you always, " he says, cynicism layered too deep in his voice to be anything other than sarcastic, " honestly, Juliet. There's nothing to work out. "

Nothing that he's willing to share with her, anyway. Nothing that she'd understand. Because it's eleven in the morning and he's four whiskies deep into his research, his own scrawling handwriting blurring before his eyes. Scribblings of a madman, maybe. Rambling notes about death and resurrection, hastily - copied passages from library books about reincarnation across differing religions and beliefs. Torn up journal entries. William's office is a disaster zone, not in the eccentric, absent - minded way it had once been; sweeping one broad hand across his work to hide it from his wife, a tired smile dripping of derision painted bone - deep into his face.

She thinks he's mourning. They both are, in their own separate ways. But she doesn't understand ! -- LIFE WILL NOT GO ON UNTIL HE MAKES IT. Until their child is back with them and he's proved to her ( to everyone ) that he can fix this by himself. Put their family back together again.

When he stands, he sways; caught off guard by his own intoxication. Still, William plants one hand solidly on his workbench, heaves himself upright to meet her eyes. Her presence is drained, but warm. But his own soul is brighter than ever, brilliant and burning, and he doesn't think he has much room in him right now to appreciate her comforting existence.

" If you want to stop arguing, then so do I. " He says flatly, but emphatically. Voice comes out wrong, a little too drawling and defensive. Shouldn't be drinking - even when he chastises himself, he gets more worked up. Using his free hand to gesture around him, he declares: " But if you're going t' ask me to stop working, you're wasting my time. " 'My time' had once been 'our time'. It's lonely with a broken home. He knows it doesn't show in his voice, how much he misses her deep down. Or at least, how much he misses missing her. He doesn't have much time for pointless grief, these days.

[one-abuse-survivor]

🦢

I was taking a bath, today. And there's this tinted window in my bathroom window, but clear enough. It shows the backyard. And my mother was standing in front of it and was jokingly saying hi. I don't know why, it made me fee really weird and self conscious. And then she remarked on how hairy i looked (from there). It's not a big deal but it made me feel exposed. I wish I could tell her how it made me feel but I know she won't take me seriously. She's just laugh me off and say she was kidding around.

I'm sorry, nonnie. That sounds like a big invasion of your privacy, and although there are probably people out there who wouldn't have minded an interaction like this because of the relationship they have with their parent and/or their body, it's completely understandable that it affected you and that it was a boundary you'd like to not have crossed again.

Even if you know she wouldn't take you seriously if you brought it up again, I hope you know that you're not the one in the wrong here. You do deserve for her to acknowledge how she made you feel and take your boundaries seriously. I'm sorry you can't have that.

Do you think you could ask for a curtain to be added to that window? I honestly think no bathroom window should give anyone outside the bathroom/house a clear look at what's happening inside. That sounds super stressful and invasive.

Sending all my support your way ❤️

[yanderenightmare]

Can you write more for naoya zenin? Your writting is soo good omg, i was thinking about ex husband naoya

Naoya Zenin

♡ TW: toxic relationship, toxic family, arranged marriage, obsessiveness, possessiveness, denied divorce, abuse, kidnapping

♡ FEM reader

Ex-husband Naoya, who refuses to sign the papers as there’s no such thing as divorce in the Zenin clan—who says it’s shameful and that you should know better than to think you can just walk away from him just like that.

Ex-husband Naoya, who is very clear about it—how if you leave, it will be with nothing to your name—nothing but the clothes on your back, and barely even that—because everything you have is owned by him—and the only reason he’s ever been willing to share it is because you’ve paid for it in his bed.

Ex-husband Naoya, who can’t believe it when you leave him anyway—who’s certain he’s coming home to a dutiful wife, all silly ideas put to rest, sweetly apologetic for ever having raised the thought—but instead comes home to a quiet, cold, and empty house—divorce papers the only trace you’ve left behind.

Ex-husband Naoya, who immediately has the Zenin clan shun your clan and makes sure all other clans do the same, completely cutting you off—telling your clan leaders that until they deliver on their side of their alliance and have you return to your rightful place, their clan is to be held in contempt.

Your family begs you to go back to him, to stop this rebellion you’re so childishly insisting on. Your father even commands you, but you’re done taking orders from men—and their brainwashed wives. You don’t owe them anything—they’re the ones who sold you off to that misogynistic madman in the first place. Serves them right to suffer the way you have.

And so, you go off on your own. 

But with his resources, ex-husband Naoya’s always able to find you—and make your life hell. Any job you manage to get fires you only a few weeks later for reasons unknown—encouraged by a silent donation—and realtors will suddenly tell you that the apartment you’ve been interested in is off the market.

Ex-husband Naoya, who comes to collect you from the woman’s shelter you’ve taken refuge at, fed-up and beyond ready to put an end to whatever it is you think you’re up to.

“I don’t have any more time for this nonsense of yours,” he says— patronizing tone making him look ugly and nothing like the great man he thinks he is. “You’re out of money, and you’re out of places to run. Come with me now, and I will still allow you a gracious return.” 

Ex-husband Naoya, who really must be the most entitled man in the world.

“Make me waste any more time, and I’ll—”

“Fuck your gracious return,” you cut him off, continuing with a sneer, “Only way I’m going anywhere with you is kicking and screaming. Now get the fuck out before I call security and have you arrested.”

Ex-husband Naoya, who looks at you as if you’ve gone mad, then proceeds to feel driven insane himself—laughing at your threat like it was all a really funny joke.

“I’ve been lenient enough with you, humoring this little rebellion of yours, allowing you to come home on your own,” he says, his voice whispy with breath, just shy of unhinged—then dead and cold come his next words, “But I see now… I’ve been too indulgent.” 

Ex-husband Naoya, who meant it when he said he was done playing games.

Ex-husband Naoya, who doesn’t have an issue with your kicking and screaming.

♡ NAOYA ZENIN masterlist ♡ JUJUTSU KAISEN masterlist