#tw how help pls???

[girlyteengirl16]

i get so depressed when people tell me about their accomplishments and my only accomplishment is getting through each day without killing myself

[chrisbangz]

happy birthday chris ♡ insp.• insp.

[faetima]

𝐝𝐥𝐦𝐥𝐮 (𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐮𝐧𝐭𝐨𝐥𝐝) . .

. . you have hanahaki, a severe case of shyness, and a crush on scaramouche, and scaramouche is an absolute jerk.

// tws ; blood ; gn reader ; hanahaki & modern au ; slight cursing 

a/n: first time posting here yippee (pls be nice)

you sobbed, heaving up stupid yellow carnations while sitting on the cold, hard floor of the school bathroom.

you wretched up the damned flowers. they fell ungracefully into the toilet which sat in front of you.

your knees hurt from sitting on them for so long.

if only you could tell him how you felt. it would finally all be over, one way or another. maybe with your feelings being requited.

or maybe with you choking to death, the only thing with you while you die being the stupid fucking flowers.

you coughed again, pale yellow petals fluttering to the ground elegantly.

it was a stark contrast to how, just moments after that, you were coughing your lungs out, flowers flopping down into the toilet in large clumps; stuck together by mucus and blood.

you wheezed and wheezed and wheezed until it felt like there was nothing left in your lungs and your throat was burning and your knees were bruised.

you sobbed and sobbed and sobbed until there were no more tears left.

you coughed and coughed and coughed to the point you thought maybe just dying would be better than this fucking hell.

you curled into a ball, crying. crystalline tears ran down your cheeks, falling onto your clothes, the ground, anything.

if only you could fucking talk. why were you like this? why were you fine with your friends, but so terrified to talk to anyone? to everyone?

to him?

maybe, just maybe, if you were different you wouldn’t be in this situation.

if only you weren’t so pathetic, so stupid, so scared.

you hated yourself. you hated yourself so, so much. who the fuck was this terrified to talk to people, but opened up so easily once others talked to them?

maybe you should just confess and get it all over with.

—

you opted to just give him a letter anonymously. 

who knew if he would even read it? he received dozens of confessions everyday.

even if he did read it, it couldn’t be that bad, right?

—

if you could, you would eat up your words.

it was much, much worse than you thought.

he had ripped open the envelope, immediately reading the letter with a scowl.

he wasn’t even halfway through when he burst out laughing.

”what the fuck is this?” he snickered, holding onto his locker so he wouldn’t fall from how hard he was laughing.

”what pathetic fucking weirdo confesses from an anonymous letter? are they too terrified to say it to my fuckin’ face?”

he continued reading the letter.

when he was done, he crumpled it up and threw it away behind him, still laughing.

”that’s so goddamn stupid.”

unfortunately, the crumpled up letter hit you on your head.

not embarrassing, right?

well, it wasn’t until scaramouche saw it had hit you.

”oh, sorry,” he exclaimed in a voice dripping with mock sweetness.

”didn’t see you there.”

it would’ve been fine until his next comment, which you unfortunately overheard.

”these dumb fucking bitches. they’re so stupid, can’t even move out of the way. what are they, blind?” he muttered under his breath, tone condescending.

you burst into tears right then and there, unable to stop the overflow of emotions.

you walked away as quick as you could, wanting to kill yourself right there.

”so emotional, and over what?”

his laugh rang down the hallway, following and taunting you.

—

you don’t know what had come over you that day. before that you had always tried to keep your emotions in check, always tried to stop the tears from coming out in front of people you didn't know.

maybe hearing your crush degrade and insult you had just struck a chord or something.

—

weak coughs wracked your frail body, using up the little energy you had left.

you were on your death bed (quite literally! you were laying on your bed while dying).

honey yellow flowers surrounded you, their sickly sweet scent making you feel nauseous.

you choked up another batch of the flaxen flowers, watching them flop forward onto your bed sheets, staining them a dull crimson because of the blood on them.

with half lidded eyes, you stared at the carnations. your mind was hazy, and your vision blurred.

if you recalled correctly, they symbolized disdain and rejection.

how fitting.

[qteachoice]

[jack-the-killler]

My brain every time I come across a minor inconvenience.

[pyrosomatic-metamorphosis]

and a spare jaiden thought. because what the fuck was all that death. all that constant death. her minimap drenched in red from the endless death. she has been so self sacrificial at LEAST since bobby died, and now this?

jaiden has more family now. she has red team. she felt like cucurucho was the only one there for her, her only friend. traumabonded to an evil bear, now traumabonded to an evil cult. they have died with her. she will die for them. over and over and over and over and over again. needless in the pure quantity of death. her life is nothing to her. and why the fuck should it? the colour of the map doesn’t bother her- her world is already red

[2129888]

i don't remember how i stumbled across this interview but i've never seen anyone mention it so i'm dropping it here <3 it's a little dated but still like super valuable and a decently in depth look at higuchi-sensei's previous works and how she works and thinks as a mangaka... personally i think it's the most i've ever learned from an interview of hers. super interesting stuff :0)

[karmaajr]

guys I fucked up..

thought it would be cool for me n my friend to "mark eachother" w my deodorant in the park near school (I had it in my pe kit) and uhhh

mb y'all (im so cooked 💀)

[rocksmakingthings]

Here's one of my more nature themed projects I did recently! Just a tiny pine display box (i think from dollar tree? actually found it at a thrift store but it has a dollar tree tag lol). I don't have any before pictures of it (blasphemy). I got a hold of wood stain last year and have been having at it with a lot of cheap wood stuff laying around

Used to hold my moth collection but it has since outgrown it! So I stained it with wood stain + hot glued moss all over and decided to use it to display my more fragile specimen's that didn't have a place yet!

(Inside: dragonfly, dried shelf fungi, twin pine seed, bird skull, white lined sphinx moth (if I'm not mistaken), butterfly I forgot to identify, cicada.

On top: porcupine quills and a chicken bone.

Porcupine quills were a gift, everything else I found and saved. Actually my brother found the moth and saved it for me.)

It does have a protective casing on the front, but I took it off for the picture because of the glare.

[anonymocha]

My part of an art trade with @jabberwockprince of their oc Venison (they/them) and Pavia. SLAUGHTER PARTY!!!!!

[ Full BLOODY version under cut ]

bonus bc their oc so fine:

[th1nnerbefored1nner]

PLEASE READ!!! ADVICE NEEDED!!!

I have a doctor’s appointment tomorrow because I tested positive for covid, and I need a doctor’s note and medication. They’re going to weigh me. The last time I went to the doctor was a month ago. When I went to my appointment in early September, I weighed 92 pounds… I weigh 82 now. They know about my history with ana, and they’re going to know I’m relapsing. I’m scared that they’re going to send me somewhere. What do I do?? I need to get the doctor’s note, so that my absences from school are excused, but I don’t want my mom and the doctor to know my weight!

[girlyteengirl16]

i want to be the worst version of myself i can possibly ever be just to show them what they did to me

[dsabian]

Increase in young women and girls using paracetamol for self harm leads Australian Government to limit pack sizes for panadol etc. Limits on where and how you can buy. Recommendations have been put forward to make it a script only med.

No mention of any preventative measures to try and avoid women and girls getting to a point where downing a large box of panadol sounds like a good idea (please don't. Apart from all the many and varied reasons why you shouldn't do this to yourself it is apparently very painful).

Thanks very much Nickolas Buckley Sydney Toxicologist who has made these recommendations. As a cis white male in a major city I very much doubt you've ever had any difficulty in your life getting even the most basic pain medication so I really appreciate you making it even harder for those of us who are not in that demographic to live pain free.

There's one pharmacist where I live. They jack the prices up on absolutely everything. We have no permanent doctors they're all ring ins. None of them like giving scripts or doing tests. They don't want to be responsible for the care of a patient they've just met, don't know the history of and will possibly never see again. And wait times for appointments is months. Not days. Months.

All of which would be irrelevant if this measure actually stopped anyone harming themselves. It won't. Taking away one means does nothing. You need to take away the impetus. And that requires more mental health care availability, more education, equality for females (of all varieties) in healthcare & education & pay & bodily autonomy & everything else. It requires prevention not policing.

Why tf do I need to be angry about this? Why is it so hard for these jerkwads to see the obvious?? Wait a year and some other drug will be taken off the shelves because it's being misused and nothing of actual value will have changed.

[kaiserkisser]

can someone nice (!!) please please please adopt me im begging you im requesting you (huge word vomit and vent in tags, pls dont read if u dont want to!! and if you don't want this stuff on this blog PLS lmk!! i dont wanna make anyone uncomfy! )

[smhpunkacademic]

deep in my heart, i just want to be good. but maybe you were right when you said i wasn’t a good person. no matter how hard i tried. no matter how often i go to therapy or take my meds and use my skills. i’m not a good person. i was hurting you, i was always hurting you and i was never really… good. even if all i wanted was to be good.

you were right when you said “your not a good person.” - i am not. and there’s no point in trying to be. so maybe it was the right decision to leave me. just as it will be the right decision for me to leave.

no matter how hard i try, i will never be good. and the earth should not worry about rotten people.

~ by your rotting Juno

[wishful-seeker]

May Apollo bless this scorching hot bath and make my knees shut up and put out the buzzing fire in my joints.