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genericpuff · 1 year ago

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The Extended Mishandling of LO's S3 Midseason Finale Premiere

Alright, so I had mentioned leading up to the release of the newest LO episode that my feelings regarding LO returning were pretty "meh". Not hyped, but not completely back of mind either. Just sort of a weird calm before the storm type feeling that could go either way.

I'm glad I got to have that moment of calmness because good god, this episode was an absolute shitshow. And honestly, I'm not surprised, for several reasons:

Rachel has never been good at maintaining a buffer, even back at the start of the series she only ever had 2-3 episodes ready ahead of her schedule which is NOT an ideal buffer for an originals series.

Rachel has never been good at writing, she's very "draw first write later" and has stated as such in interviews that when she gets 'stuck' on what she's writing, she'll just start drawing and fit the pieces in later.

Four months is NOT enough time to both rest, attend massive conventions, and work on improving a project while also getting buffer episodes ready.

Because of the FP episodes remaining locked over the hiatus, technically Rachel only needed to have ONE episode ready upon return for the newest FP release, not multiple like she'd usually need like in the past during the S2 midseason hiatus or the season finale episodes which would unlock those FP releases like normal - so for all we know, she could have drawn this episode literally last week, especially when the promo material was so last minute. Frankly I think it was REALLY stupid for whoever it was who decided to keep these FP episodes locked (whether it was her or WT, it was more likely WT) but you can read all I have to say about that in my review of the midseason finale episodes.

All that's to say, no, there was never any guarantee Rachel was going to somehow "turn around" the ride we're currently on. I know that many of the critics were hoping for that to happen, but with the circumstances of the hiatus mixed with Rachel's bad habits of putting her best efforts into the procrastination projects that aren't her actual comic (ex. the few original pieces and LO sketches she put out during the hiatus) it just wasn't in the cards. This is where the comic is at and this is where it will remain until it's over.

I want to also point something out about this episode that was... really glaring to me.

As with all of these hiatus returns, LO got priority advertising in the first two banner slots and push notifications AND a popup ad within the app. This is unsurprising, Webtoons is still trying to milk this thing for what it's worth.

I know a lot of people are gonna focus on the art, or the fact that WT is continuing to shill LO, but I wanna point out the part that WT implemented specifically - "NEW SEASON".

This is literally just false. At best I'd like to think some intern just messed up and thought this was a new season, but it's literally not, the episode designation still says "S3". Note that the creators only design the banner art, the actual labels on top are put there by Webtoons.

But at worst, this feels like blatant lying to continue to hide the fact that LO is ending. Mind you, Rachel and Webtoons have still not put out official posts stating that this is the final arc. There is NOTHING from either of them to communicate to the audience that the comic is ending next year. It feels like they're trying to avoid the topic altogether out of fear of losing the fanbase they still have, rather than hyping up the comic's end for those who have stuck around to see how it all wraps up. And honestly, I wouldn't be surprised if this was the case, considering they're now trying to funnel the fanbase into Penguin/Inklore with new marketing deals and the whole Rachel Smythe Presents thing. They're trying to make this seem like the beginning of something "new" when it's really just a quiet shifting of management (Penguin House).

But all that aside, let's actually get into the episode. It's one episode after 4 months, which is not standard for LO's hiatuses, typically FP episodes release on schedule (meaning free readers start hiatuses 3 weeks after FP readers do), the only time this has been an exception has been with the 2 week breaks because the whole point of those was to build a buffer (which you can't do if you're going ahead and releasing the FP episodes anyways). For extended hiatuses like these, usually free readers still get their FP episodes, but that wasn't the case here. That means Rachel technically only needed one episode ready for the comic's return, and it shows. It really fucking shows.

FROM HERE ON OUT THERE WILL BE FASTPASS SPOILERS REGARDING EPISODE 254. DO NOT CONTINUE IF YOU DO NOT WANT TO BE SPOILED !!!

As per tradition, we get a title that means nothing at all. It just says what we already know.

Our collective husband Zeus is dying, no thanks to the poison cupcake fed to him by Apollo. For those who don't remember, Apollo had tricked Zeus into eating the cupcake by making him believe it was from Hebe. We are fully aware that it was Apollo who poisoned him. Remember that for later in this review.

Right off the bat we're off to a hilarious start, both with a cryptid appearance from Apollo in the background (lmao) who is, for some reason, ALREADY returning to the scene of the crime he just committed because... who knows at this point. Apollo and Psyche know it was Apollo at this point, I might add, but I have no clue why Apollo is actually returning to the scene of the crime when he has no idea Eros and Psyche know.

Moving on from that, can we talk about this hilarious dialogue?

"We have to call a doctor! Let's call Asclepius!"

"No, we can't trust him! Gosh darn it, why are we only bothering to think of ONE doctor in this universe where we've seen more than one doctor?? Guess Zeus is just gonna die! What a horribly contrived situation this is!"

And that's literally how I can best describe most of this episode. Contrived. There is a LOT of manufactured drama in this that makes ZERO sense even on a surface level.

And what do you mean exactly, Eros? "What a terrible system!" Is this supposed to be a joke? Lampshading? We've seen Persephone go to the gynecologist. There are non-god doctors who tend to gods all the time here.

Eros just doesn't seem to be that pressed over this, he sounds like Ned Flanders and that's NOT a good way to open up a scene like this... let alone an episode people have been waiting four months for.

Anyways, after a few pointless reaction panels (again remember I have to cut a lot of what I show here for Tumblr image limitations but I promise you, I'm keeping as much important stuff as I can in this, there's just THAT MUCH filler at this point), Eros and Psyche confront Apollo and he is... good god.

There is... so much to unpack here.

First of all, remember those theories about how Rachel was clearly trying to write Apollo as this "secret twist villain" the whole time but it doesn't work because Apollo is simultaneously written as both a 'conniving villain' and a massive dumbass at the same time?

Well, I finally have a more appropriate term for him. He's your average red pill redditor - someone who thinks he's smarter than everyone else when really all he does is sit on reddit all day using big words incorrectly in arguments he gets himself into with a bunch of equally-air-headed dumbasses.

"You can't possibly understand the nuances of the Olympian political system," Apollo said proudly, a man who had, ironically and obliviously, run for president in a monarchy. The union of kettle and pot is eternal.

He's the Slappable Jerk but instead of it being a painfully hilarious impression, it's just painful and hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

this is so stupid because it's 1.) Eros pointing out how obvious Apollo's plan was, despite Apollo acting smart two seconds ago with a goddess who, mind you, has been a goddess for ten years, and 2.) patricide isn't even intrinsically linked to politics, there's nothing 'political' about a guy trying to kill his dad except in, idk, a monarchy, which again, Apollo has spent ten years trying to rise to power in as a president which is a completely different form of government.

If I wanted to be really granular with this, I'd like to think Apollo is making some kind of point about the critics who call out LO's whack as fuck political system (especially in the trial arc) - as if he's saying "well you're just a stupid reader and this is fantasy where you don't understand exactly what political system we're using, so shut the fuck up you stupid twig" - but I don't think it's meant to be that deep. I think it's just Rachel trying to write a smart character and then failing at it because she, herself, is not a smart writer. And I'm really inclined to believe that more than the theory about this being some kind of meta-narrative about the critics because this entire plotline is contrived and stupid down to its core.

I did not cut anything out here, that's the pacing. Leto literally just appears out of nowhere and uh oh spaghettio's, she has Kassandra! Remember Leto? The character we were led to believe was truly "pulling the strings" until she disappeared from the story completely after she realized that Apollo and Persephone weren't a thing, even going so far as to call out her own son for being a fucking dumbass? Well, she's back and once again she's being involved as some kind of "double agent" in this whole thing, even though we literally haven't seen her since halfway through S2.

"Mm yes, you're so stupid, falling into my trap! Even though you had no reason to remember Kassandra anyways because she's literally a mortal woman you just met and you yourself have committed acts of violence against mortals without a shred of care! I'm so smart! My plan is all coming together!"

We've never seen Apollo do anything except cry and poop his pants, the closest he got to being "powerful" was his attempts to murder Daphne (who he seems to have forgotten about in this "master plan" of his) but ultimately he's literally just a piss ant baby and there's no reason to believe that he could somehow outmatch the God of Love who can literally manipulate people's emotions and states of mind with his arrows. But yeah sure go off, you're so powerful and smart.

The worst part is, I can't even buy this as the narrative trying to be like "see how manipulative and conniving he is?" because it's just silly. We've SEEN this man cry with his victim complex, we've seen him say and do the DUMBEST things that don't lend to any amount of "intelligence" he may have, it comes across less as him being "smart the whole time" and more as him trying to sound smart but ultimately sounding incredibly stupid. And I can't even immerse myself into it and buy that maybe that's the point, because it doesn't feel like the point, it just feels like inconsistent writing, he doesn't feel like a 'threat', he's just monologuing.

Bad art and Apollo literally just repeating what Leto already implied so this is a waste of the audience's time.

This is the funniest panel in the whole episode because I can't tell if Apollo is supposed to be in the background (for some reason, despite him literally being in front of Eros and Psyche two seconds ago) or if he's in the foreground and just REALLY small for some reason. This is so off-putting. And of course, it's just Apollo explaining what we're ALREADY SEEING ONSCREEN.

You see, in addition to this episode being contrived, it also talks down to its audience a LOT by explaining exactly what we're seeing onscreen. It's like Rachel saw the criticisms about her not including enough to depict what's actually going on in her head and so she thought the solution was to spoon feed information over pictures that are already doing the job of explaining what's going on. Rachel really doesn't know how to write and even when she tries to implement changes that reflect criticisms that have been made of her writing, she somehow makes things worse because she completely misses the point of what those criticisms are trying to get across.

Anyways, without even trying to resist (for some reason) Eros and Psyche get sentenced to horny jail.

They're now trapped in a basement that Leto somehow has in her home. How do we know that?

HAHAHA FUNNY LAMPSHADING SO FUNNNYYYYYYY

Leto claims that they shouldn't try to escape because the dungeon is "enchanted", but she doesn't even bother to explain what that means. So they literally don't bother trying. They don't try to call her bluff, they don't try to teleport out of there, they literally just go "well shoot", shrug their shoulders, and accept their fate. Just like with the whole "we can't trust the only doctor we bothered to think of" situation, Eros and Psyche are turning out to be some of the stupidest, lowest-effort characters in this comic who literally can't be bothered to try because that would require too much brain power.

Notice how much time we've spent on this and we haven't gotten back to where the cliffhanger of the last episode left off? Well buckle up because there's still more to cover.

So it turns out Hebe was still inside with her dad, in FULL VIEW of what was going on through glass which is somehow COMPLETELY soundproof, and when Apollo steps inside, she just has no idea what happened. She never bothered to even look outside to see what was going on with Eros and Psyche, she's just been sitting on the floor staring at Zeus' dead face for what was likely several minutes, unless Rachel is seriously trying to convince us that conversation and hostage negotiation from earlier only took 2 seconds. The timeline is such a mess at this point that characters basically freeze in place as soon as they're not the focus of the scene.

Apollo rushes inside, acting shocked over the situation, and when Hebe asks where Eros and Psyche are (again, she could have just looked out the window at any time), he's just like "dur idk they just left lol" which Hebe just... buys, I guess.

That's just Persephone but yellow. She's even missing her beauty mark.

See how Apollo put his hand on Zeus' chest/shoulder by the way?

Apparently, despite Mr. Smarter Than Everyone Else trying to pretend it wasn't him, he's able to discern that Zeus is dying from a toxic and rare poison just from touching him. He doesn't even really seem to use his powers, he just touches him and goes "welp he's dead i guess lol don't bother asking me how I know that".

But oh nooo remember that note from before? Well gasp Apollo's gonna use it to frame Hebe! In front of no one else at all!

Hebe of course says she didn't write it, but Apollo continues to try and frame her anyways, even though, again, there's no one else present here, and so it effectively just becomes the most absurd form of gaslighting I've ever seen.

Again, THERE IS NO ONE ELSE HERE IN THE SCENE. He's just trying to claim she did it to absolutely no one at all, in the hopes of... what exactly? That she'll just take the fall for something she knows she didn't do? That she'll somehow be convinced? It's not like Hebe has the same thing going on as Persephone where she has a 'wrathful dark side' he could pin it on, this is just a criminal who just robbed a building pointing at the first person they see and yelling "YOU DID IT!"

All I'm saying is that Apollo would be really bad at Among Us. He'd be the type of player to kill someone, hit the report button, then claim yellow did it which, even if he DID convince the rest of the team, would still get kicked anyways as soon as yellow was proven through the eject to not be the imp and everyone would go "okay cool so yellow wasn't the imp, that means obviously it's purple self-reporting." It's a trick that doesn't even work anymore because of how old it is. Hebe isn't a child here, she's an 18 year old woman who should be fully capable of raising an eyebrow and wondering why Apollo is this quick to accuse her - almost like he's trying to hide the fact that he did it.

But Hebe can't catch onto this, just like Eros and Psyche, she has to act stupid for the sake of the plot.

At first I thought maybe Rachel was trying to do some "whodunit" scenario, but that doesn't work here because we already know who did it. And while there are stories that exist like that that pull it off (ex. Knives Out) the problem with trying to do this the way Rachel did is that the person being framed has to have this thing called motive. The reason why Knives Out and Glass Onion work so well is because the person who was murdered (or conspired against) is someone who is being targeted by multiple people who could all be the murderer. It's quite literally called out in Glass Onion as a form of smart lampshading. "It's like putting a loaded gun on the table, and turning off the lights."

But it doesn't work here because Hebe does not have motive. If you're going to attempt to frame a murder on someone, it has to be someone who would have reasonable motive to commit that murder, even if they didn't actually commit it.

And who among Zeus' children has motive?

What about the war-mongering bloodthirsty god of war who has been regularly sentenced to time in the Mortal Realm to fight in wars in which he's been regularly injured?

What about the chaos-seeking wrathful goddess who would do it to get revenge on the parental figure who cast her aside, or even just for the fun of saying she did it?

Why try and pin it on Hebe, the doting daughter of Zeus who's only had a collective of maybe 20 panels in the entire comic?

But then I realized... it's not Knives Out, it's the fucking Lion King.

Which is just as contrived - if not more - than the assumption this was gonna be some attempt to frame Hebe. It's not. He's literally just trying to keep her from assuming it was him. He could have just as easily played dumb without calling attention to the note but he intentionally went out of his way to try and be Scar from The Lion King , while completely missing the point of why that scene worked in the original movie.

Scar wasn't trying to 'frame' Simba for Mufasa's murder. He was trying to hide the murder, while also attempting to get the only heir to the throne out of the picture, so he passed the guilt of the death onto Simba - a child who, unlike Hebe, wouldn't have the ability to rationalize or realize his uncle his a scumbag - who then ran away from home because he was too terrified to face his family for what happened, assuming that it was all his fault when it wasn't.

That's not how this is panning out here. Hebe is the now 18 year old daughter of Zeus, and not one of his only children. She doesn't even fit into the whole "sons overthrowing their fathers" prophecy like Aries would. Apollo is literally just being a big idiot here by saying "well I'm gonna give you a headstart to run away, because if you stay, I might hurt you" (which btw, should be MORE of a smoking gun that Apollo did it??)

And again, it's all so contrived so that the plot can move forward. "Well I'm going to frame you for this murder, but y'know, you should just leave, I'm not gonna try and press it further lmao"

Again, Apollo is a fucking idiot here, because he just attempted to frame someone who has NO MOTIVE to harm Zeus, to absolutely NO ONE at all who would side with him, only to let her go which would leave her to question why Apollo would try to accuse and harm her in the first place before considering other options. And through ALL this he claims he's the smart one, which I can't even be bothered to "love to hate" because it's written so poorly.

And really it all comes down to how everyone else behaves in relation to Apollo that makes it so stupid and unbelievable. Apollo, you're not smart just because all the characters around you are intentionally being written to be as stupid and non-confrontation as possible. If you can only write a smart villain by making everyone else stupid, you haven't written a smart villain, you've written a dumbass whose victory only happens due to contrived plot convenience. It's not even done well like in Glass Onion, it's just bad writing, full stop.

And who does he call to report this emergency? The satyr police? His son the doctor?

No.

The media. Literally just "hello, the media?? I need your best journalist here stat!"

I need you to understand, even if he were calling a tabloid magazine like The Weekly Nark, you don't just... call a journalist to report a murder. These are not the actions of someone who's trying to absolve himself of guilt, these are the actions of a complete dumbass trying to get news coverage of his trophy kill who would be better off just playing dumb instead of trying to play smart. Even Walter White wasn't this fucking stupid despite all the times he fell on his own sword, Apollo is literally just instigating suspicion towards himself for no reason at all. He's self-reporting so hard and worst of all, you can't even take any of this seriously because of how corny it is. There's no dramatic tension, no stakes, it's just a bunch of characters performing in a really bad stage play and reducing every conflict to "well I guess Zeus is just dead now because no one's bothering to make an effort to stop Apollo or ask questions lmao"

It's truly the epitome of "this plot wouldn't exist if characters would just talk to each other."

But finally, FINALLY we mention the thing this episode is named after, the transition point to Persephone.

Just like with the midseason finale episode, there's a lot to cover here, so I'm gonna get more into it in a part two post.

That said, you can see already this is the messiest, most contrived bullshit to ever wind up in LO. It's trying so hard to be smart and it just comes across as a bunch of toddlers in the world's worst stage play rendition of Clue. None of what was done here was in any way dramatic or tense, it's just a bunch of characters infodumping shit we already know, trying to set up new plot threads that don't make any sense, and allowing one another to get away with what they're doing because they don't bother to even try.

It's completely manufactured, contrived nonsense. It's not "smart", it's not "so dumb it's brilliant", it's just dumb.

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#lore olympus critical #lo critical #anti lore olympus #this is the comic that bought two eisners #uh i mean *won* two eisners #... no wait i had it right the first time lmao

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silverview · 17 days ago

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amazing bracelets @spcvarney made for me, i love them so much 😭💕💕💕 had a great time again at s/f, got to see a bunch of people from here who were all so cool & lovely, i feel so lucky!!

reece & steve DID come out to sign things this time! we were told not to ask for selfies, so i just got my s9 script book signed by both of them. i asked reece if he'd had a good time & he looked up at me, smiled, and said yes he did, and thanks for coming. 🥹💗

there was also merch for sale in the theatre, and that poster i mentioned is s/f specific, but in a way that's not obvious until you've seen the play.

some further unorganised thoughts about the show + audio links below the cut, spoilers obviously ⚠️

new recordings added here (18-01) [edit 20-01-2025: removed the link] in case you want to compare & contrast (@lapis-lazuliie!) there were a few small changes & the scene change with the video screen was much smoother. i accidentally cut off the coda to the song at the very end in my haste to get to the stage door

in the opening sketch, there’s a reference to an 80s-style production of taming of the shrew. certainly a reference to the play where reece first laid eyes on steve. theatre at the heart of their relationship from the very beginning. it really is all about them and their love story

(when you know the twist in this bit, you notice that toby leaves when steve comes onstage, and then once s & r are onstage together, s just stares at r for a moment too long)

in general, i just love the shakespeare in it. love hamlet obviously and love the range of their theatrical references. i get emo about reece on gbbo “jokingly” griping that he’ll never get to play hamlet, because you know he thinks he'd smash it, and you know he knows he never will. and that he still slightly blames his comedy career for the fact he didn’t get to. and that it's specifically a dream that dies when you get too old. (“the most devastating moment in a young man’s life…”)

goudron & hugo are doing it blake & drew style. as in, here’s a creepy guy. here’s the methods he uses to sexually abuse his female patients. now here he is doing those same things to a man. now let’s not address the subtext of that ❤️ yay ❤️ i honestly am thinking about writing self-indulgent fic about them but not till after the run at least. OH AND the set for that whole bit is turquoise, like the trolley problem. alright.

they've changed that bit slightly so that when hugo comes back in, he's already in the chair, and doesn't need to be restrained. which makes much more sense, and it's clear they should have done it that way from the beginning, except force of habit and reece's need to be strapped to a chair made them try it the other way first.

sidenote, i need goudron carnally, i’m sorry. if i’m acting more than typically horny for steve, you know that’s why. i think the drastic & abrupt shift in fuckability levels from act 1 to act 2 doesn’t help. white coat, sleeve garters, moustache, brown hair.

speaking of clothes, reece as himself at the beginning was wearing smart brown shoes + smart trousers + pale blue shirt + soft grey sweater vest. as marcus at the end he's wearing a jacket over a turtleneck, very cute. also very cute as marcus in hugo's stripy pyjamas with a big cosy cardigan over the top. hugo has curly dark hair with a grey streak, and a big curly moustache that gets a laugh when he takes off his surgical mask.

the guest this time was kevin eldon! he did the line from zanzibar and reece went fully into the hokey cokey!!! i would post the clip but it is mostly just me laughing

i mentioned this briefly in my original post, but it really is crazy that they make it so obvious how len has written his real feelings/anxieties about the relationship into the kidnappers sketch. purely because like… lads YOU are sketch writers. you are making it very clear that YOU put your real feelings/anxieties about your relationship into your work. we knew this already but it's too much too much

it's easy to not tell bf what happens in the show (we're seeing it together late feb) but it is very VERY hard to not walk around the flat constantly singing tears of laughter

on the final night at the end steve really does need to just grab reece and kiss him

#in9 #stagefright

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clevercatchphrase · 14 days ago

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Cheers to a decade

My blog is 10 years old today. I have some thoughts.

On Januray 22nd, 2015, I made this tumblr blog. I remember it being my second semester of my senior year in college and feeling lost and depressed in my dorm room. Despite being in the class of 2015, I had technically graduated the winter prior, having come in to college with enough AP credits from high school to be ahead a semester. I remember not being ready to become an "official" adult yet. Despite having a degree, I didn't feel like I had enough choices in my future, so I stayed an extra year (3 semesters) and got a second degree before finally just being too sick of college life to stay there any longer.

I made this blog to practice art, but in truth, I think it was to distract myself from existential dread of being bottle necked into an occupation I didn't want with little to no choice of upward movement. I can't remember my exact thoughts, but I have a strong feeling it was along the lines of "if I can't get a job I like with my entomology degree, then I will practice art and try my luck as a freelance artist!" Not that freelance is any easier than an hourly paid 9 to 5, but at least it let me feel like I had more options.

It's so surreal scrolling back to that very first year. I posted a lot more frequently and did a lot more doodles and sketches and figure drawings back then. I didn't care about scheduling or queuing posts. I saw a cool tutorial? Neat, I'm reblogging this right now. just pumped out a 2 minute doodle of an animal, and it's going up on the blog immediately. I did more art challenges. Heck, I made a 50 day art challenge for homestuck and DID it! I made my very first long form song comic less than a month after creating this blog. It was for kingdom hearts set to the song "king" by Lauren Aquilina (which was almost certainly inspired by the LoZ song comic made by caffeineandcarpaltunnel set to the same song 2 years prior. (and I don't even play loz, I just liked the song)). I can't help but question myself; "where did all this motivation go?" "Where did all that passion go?" "Now I only post one piece of art a week and queue all the other stuff in november only." (Well, I didn't start doing that last thing until 2022, so I guess I can always revert my neurotic habits). But then I have to remember that until the summer of 2016, I didn't have a job. I didn't have bills. I lived in dorm rooms and off of college loans that funded my meal plan. Any time I wasn't studying or hanging out with other Cepheids (shout out to the 3 of you who know what that means) I was undoubtedly on the internet, enjoying what the 2010's web had to offer.

Can you believe youtube hadn't officially been around for 10 years at that point? musical.ly hadn't merged with TikTok yet because TikTok hadn't even been created in 2015. Vine still existed. This blog is even older than Undertale's official release.

I can't help but think of my life in "chunks" or "eras", some based on where I lived at the time, some based on the state of the world at the time, but a majority of it based on the media I was obsessed with at that time. (For example, 1998 to 2002 I refer to as the "hawaii era" because my family was military and we were stationed in Hawaii.) Shorter eras can also exist within bigger eras, like 2016 to 2020 is my zoo era, because I was a part time zookeeper, but it exists within my undertale era, which is still ongoing (this hyperfixation has a choke hold on me). So whenever I am given a date, I cross-reference it with what era of my life it occurred in, comparing it to my mental state and what was happening with my life. This blog started in my homestuck era (which went from early 2011 to late 2015) and it fucking showsssssss.

Another example; some of the earliest art on this blog was for Kingdom Hearts, because I am a KH fan. KH3 released in 2019. My blog had just turned 4 years old THREE days prior in 2019. KH3 will be SIX years old three days from today. 2019 was before the pandemic. I was still at my zoo job. Ghost switch wasn't even 1 year old yet. It's this kind of mental math that I am constantly doing for everything all the time whenever I have a date to compare to. Why do I do this? I have no clue. To measure up progress or advancements? To contrast what I've accomplished in that same amount of time versus what others have achieved? I don't know, but I've always done it and I will never stop. The endless forward march of time bewitches me so in this way.

Looking at the years and dates, remembering how it overlapped with my time in college and the memes of the early 2010s, which reminds me of my college era (fall 2011 to spring 2016) which brings up a whole well of other memories, like the world ending in 2012, the let's players I'd watch because I didn't have a gaming console or tv in my dorm, the basketball concessions I'd volunteer at to pay for my ticket to go to the student-run convention in the spring, the libraries and computer labs and dining halls, and shitty dorm room thermostats in winter and it's blaring fire alarms that would go off at 3 am because people microwaved popcorn wrong, and the time it rained so hard on campus that the basement hangout zone flooded.

Man... this whole thing got melancholic. I thought it would be nostalgic, but now it feels like I'm doing an elephant walk for my own blog (again, shout out to the three of you who knows what that even means). I don't know if my past self would recognize or approve of who I am now. And yet, I also can't say i've changed all that much. I still live at home with my family because I can't afford a house of my own. I still keep up with the youtube channels I subscribed to in 2013. I still check in on the webcomics that went on indefinite hiatus in 2010. I still use the same deviantart account I made in 2007. I still log on to my neopets account that I made in 2004.

This blog has been with me through a third of my life.

I don't know what I'll do when I finish Ghost Switch. (which will still take me 6 more years to finish, don't worry, I'm not going anywhere soon). Maybe i'll go back to posting shitty little doodles that I drew quickly in 2 minutes to practice figure drawing. Maybe I'll finally learn to code and make that visual novel I've been brainstorming since 2017. Maybe I'll make more (shorter) webcomics with my own OCs. Maybe I'll sit down and actually seriously think about professionally editing and querying a few of those novel drafts I wrote for nanowrimo, which I've also done for 10 years now, too. Maybe I'll come out of the closet and finally embrace the fact that I am a furry and draw nothing but anthro wolves and dogs.

Last year, I pulled out 10 old composition notebooks that I used as diaries for the years 2005 to 2010. This covered the beginning of seventh grade for me, to the end of 11th grade. Rereading these journals was simultaneously the most hysterical things I've ever written as well as the most depressing shit I've ever written, but that's just middle and high school for ya, babe. Still, I bring it up because when I look back on the past, I never know what I will think or feel about the past in hindsight. Seeing so many informative and hilarious posts from those early years fills me with great joy and also great sorrow, because those times are gone now. The internet landscape has changed so much, tumblr included. I do wish I could go back, sometimes. To go back to being so care-free, to relive those highs fandoms gave me when everything was new and exciting and happening Right Now, to be less stressed out about the state of the world, to laugh at stupid nonsensical rage comic memes.

But I also want to stay right here. To be proud of how far I've come, to appreciate what I've accomplished so far, and to remind myself that Today is good, too. I don't want to waste all my time wishing to go back to the past, because in 10 years from now, I'm going to wish I could come back to Now.

Do I even think tumblr will still be around in 2035? Probably. We're kinda like a roach like that, and also i've got some posts queued for 2033 that i need to see go live for The Bit.

Anyway, to end this reflection on a more positive note, thanks for hanging around for so long. We're all stuck on this glue trap together, but I'm glad I'm with you. These last 10 years have been interesting and wild, both on and off the internet, and I hope the thrills don't stop anytime soon.

#ramble #happy 10 year anniversary to this blog #fun fact; this is not my only tumblr blog #I have an older one specifically dedicated to bugs that I made as an extra credit project for one of my ento classes #but you don't get to know what it's called tho because I'd end up doxxing myself.

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starzzluvr · 2 years ago

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★ boxer!ellie headcanons

first post ever :o these r balls but i was bored n wanted to post something so . . .

— boxer!ellie x reader (gf)

lowercase intended

★ ellie is an infamous bare-knuckle boxer, in some dingy, underground fight club within jackson.

★ of course the first rule of any fight club, is don’t talk about said fight club. and that applied to you too - a pretty girl like you should never be mixed up in a mess like that, therefore she had no plans on telling you anything about it.

★ she’d persistently lie and tell you the cuts and bruises littered across her face and hands were from patrol - you believed her of course, it made sense.

★ that was until cat, who was also a part of the same hobby, had accidentally ran her mouth and you flew straight back to ellie to interrogate her on the matter.

★ at first she’d try to deny it.

. . . “the fuck are you talking about?”

. . . “cat told me, ellie.”

. . . “cat’s a cunt.. and a liar.”

★ but you quickly learned the truth after doing some snooping. you weren’t mad she kept it from you, although you were beyond worried for her, this ‘hobby’ was far from safe.

★ ellie totally banned you from attending her brawls despite your pleas to go with her, to make sure she’d be okay, clean her up if need be. she wouldn’t let you see her like that.

★ because with you, and only you, ellie was gentle. to others, not so much. she was snappy, short-tempered, blunt, easily frustrated. but never with you - she had the biggest soft spot for you.

. . . “sweet girl”

. . . “hey pretty”

. . . “baby”

★ when she wasn’t getting caught up in her bad habit, she would often find herself painting or drawing, usually stuff for you. she loveddd the way your eyes would light up when she handed you one of her sketches or silly doodles, signed with a <3

★ she also loved space, planets, stars. no one would have guessed that asshole ellie williams would be into that, nor would she tell anyone, only you knew.

. . . she told the stars about you

★ she has the worst swearing habit, not only because of her short-temper, but because the words were naturally ingrained into her vocabulary.

★ of course ellie is strong. toned muscles, abs and all. she used that to her advantage around you, never letting you do any hefty work.

. . . “ellie. i’m perfectly capable of moving a couple bricks.”

★ even after a not so victorious fight or a shitty day, she’s still so gentle and patient with you, never letting a loss and her consequential frustration affect her tone with you.

★ she'd sometimes come home late, early hours in the morning and see you passed out on her couch after you'd attempted to stay awake until she came back. you didn't live together though you spent a lot of time at her house and that's what you'd been doing that day, before she'd had to leave for a couple hours. when she got back, she'd pick you up and lightly lift you onto her bed, gently brushing loose strands of hair from your face and admiring your pretty features.

★ she is incredibly protective of you. if a dude looks a you the wrong way, she can’t keep her mouth closed.

. . .“the fuck are you staring at, prick, huh?”

★ if somebody touches you, tries to hurt you, she sees red. she’ll have them on the floor beating the absolute shit out of them.

. . .”don’t you ever lay a fucking finger on her ever the fuck again. that clear? or do i need to dent your thick skull you fucker.”

★ since you couldn’t go to a fight with ellie, you still made yourself as useful as possible. as much as you hated her habit, you still made sure to take care of her as best as you could.

★ you’d have her sit on the edge of her bathtub, and slot yourself between her legs, her hands rested on the back of your thighs. you would blot her face with a dampened cloth, while she would run her hands up and down your thighs, then up to the curve of your waist, thumbs rubbing small circles on your skin, loving the way your heart would quicken and your cheeks would heat up, painted with a pretty pink.

★ beneath that cold, sharp exterior on display for everyone else, ellie was so unbelievably in love with you. most people ‘round jackson believed she was far from capable of loving.

if only they knew her like you do.

#ellie williams #ellie williams hcs #ellie williams headcanons #tlou #the last of us #boxer!ellie #lesbian #ellie x reader #ellie

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ghostingpen · 3 months ago

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hi!! i’ve been meaning to ask u abt this for a while, but the pic u posted of your 2025 journal inspired me to reach out. i would rly like to get back into using a journal as a way to organize, plan, and feel more in control of my life. i used to use a bullet journal throughout high school and college. but my situation is different now (no classes or defined work schedule) and i remember often having a hard time keeping up with it + missing a day or two and then just falling off. i also tend to be a perfectionist and get stressed out abt making The Perfect layout. ig i’m just wondering if you have any tips or advice for getting started again and figuring out a setup that feels good + manageable? i’d send this as a message but i feel this might be helpful for other ppl too. ty!!!

(rubs hands together) ty for asking >:3 i was in your boat too for a while, and what a lot of bullet journalers tend to understandably forget is that the bullet journal system is customizable and flexible. what this also means is that you can frankenstein the bullet journal method and create your system made up of sewn together components of various other methods.

if your primary goal with your notebook is feel more in control and present in your life, then it's important to view it as a second brain. it is reasonable to believe that not all brains work alike. when combining both thoughts, you can start to see the reason why many people who try the bullet journal method are unable to keep it up long-term. they try to be too rigid with the method. they expect themselves to create artsy complicated layouts that aren't actually conducive to their brain. they need to have the same notebook as other people, the same pens, the same supplies.

but each of our minds work differently. when you believe that, then it becomes easier to accept that your notebook does not have to look the same as others to be successful. you aren't failing because you're unable to work with the system the way others do. it is the current system failing you, and that simply means it's time to tweak it and change it as necessary until it becomes more compatible with your brain. maybe the size of the notebook is the problem. or the type of paper. for example: i find that tall and skinny notebooks like the traveler's notebook work best for me. but maybe you prefer big a4 sized notebooks. i also refuse to work on anything that isn't grid paper. but maybe lined paper works better for you.

for me, i use my notebook as a writer the way an artist keeps a sketchbook.

that means i don't play with the layouts unless it serves me. my creativity is expressed solely in the pages i want to be creative in, like when i'm writing fiction or sketching storyboards, but i am intentionally not creative and artistic in the basic setup.

for the basic setup, i'm using a hybrid system of the basic bullet journal method and the life hacker. my intentions are to be mindful of the goals i want to achieve and keep some memory of each day. otherwise it feels as though the month has gone on without me and before i know it, it's the next month and i remember nothing of the past few weeks.

i make sure to keep an index on the back of my notebook. i write down page numbers of pages i want to refer back to later.

i start with a "one line a day" page:

that way, if i miss a few days, i can always try to catch up and write down a single line of what i remembered that day. i also tell myself it's okay to write "i don't remember what happened" on days where that happens. in a way, that also indicates something about that day - usually that i was too depressed to engage with my interests, and that's important to log.

then i set up a basic monthly spread to track upcoming events, bills to pay, habits, tasks i want to do that month, and goals i want to achieve. i also added a d20 roll every day just for fun. if i really need the guidance, whatever i rolled that day determines how i go about with my day.

i also don't really treat it like a chore. i miss days here and there, but when that happens i just set the next day up and move on. this notebook is meant to serve me, not the other way around!

this notebook also serves as my commonplace book. if you've seen me occasionally tag posts as #commonplace, that's me saving posts to write down in my notebook. i love to save advice i appreciated, quotes that resonate with me, and other bits and bobs of information i'd want to re-read in the future.

i also like to write down my thoughts on topics that interest me. it actually is one of my biggest passions and special interests: optimizing a notebook system for myself and helping others find their system. so if you flipped through my current notebook, you'll find rambles about notebook systems and how simply following trends is ineffective.

hope this helps!! i wrote a lot more than i thought i would dfkghdf but this is a huge interest of mine.

#journal #journaling #bullet journal #planner #notebook #mine #asks #twinknote #my journal

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the-wip-project · 11 months ago

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Bad Brain Days

Today I’m having a bad brain day.

It’s not that my brain is misbehaving. It’s just having a rough time functioning.

You might call it something else, and it has numerous causes, a bad night’s sleep, a flare up of a chronic health condition, medication issues, a short term illness, or simply being overwhelmed with responsibilities.

Whatever the cause, we all have days when our brain doesn’t want to do what it’s supposed to, ie: think.

Which is bad for life in general, and particularly bad for the thinky work of writing.

So what does a committed writer do when faced with a bad brain day?

The first and simplest thing is yield. If your body is telling you to rest, it’s a good idea to heed it.

I don’t advocate for pushing yourself to write every single day. (unless streaks really work well for you, in that case streak on!) It’s especially important if your bad brain days are often caused by feeling overwhelmed.

No doubt you have things you must get done: work, classes, child or elder care, household responsibilities. Things you can’t skip just because you’re not feeling up to it. So do yourself a favor and skip the non-vital tasks, like writing. Just for today.

But perhaps that writing habit thing is starting to catch hold and you’re looking forward to your writing session as something you do for yourself, but sadly your brain just won’t go in the words and ideas direction. What then?

The best thing is to make a list of what you can do. If you have low brain usefulness days frequently, on a good day try coming up with a list of things you can do on slow brain days.

Here’s some ideas to get you started.

1. Read. Skip the social media doom scroll, turn off your devices, and read something on paper. It could be an old favorite that feels comforting, it could be something new and exciting, but either way, focus on what makes the book or story good. We hear a lot about reading critically, and finding fault seems to dominate that. But try reading to admire. Pay attention to what you enjoy, what makes you smile, what makes you feel immersed. Read with the intention of enjoyment.

2. Do something story adjacent. If you like posting about your WIP on socials, find a few good pull quotes and queue them up. Or create a synopsis or pitch to keep on file for whenever someone asks what you’re writing. If you like making visual stuff like mood boards, make one for a scene or character.

3. Feeling up to diving into the work itself? How about updating your outline? Read over what you have written and add whatever changes you’ve made to the outline. It doesn’t have to be complex. Just try making one sentence summaries of each scene. You can do this if you didn’t have an outline to begin with too.

4. Talk to a friend about your writing. Writers need social interaction and if your writing has been consuming a lot of your spare time, just connecting with a friend might be what you need. (and don’t make it all about your writing! Be a good friend!)

5. Make starting tomorrow easier. Do non writing stuff that smooths the way, like tidying up the formatting or layout, creating blank chapters or scenes, or even sketching out a scene without making an attempt to fill in all the blanks.

Finally, don’t make any major decisions about your WIP on a bad brain day. You might do something your regret. Instead make notes on any major cuts or changes that feel needed, and look at them again on a day when you feel good.

And don’t make your writing another burden that makes everything too hard to carry. Tomorrow, when your head is (hopefully) clearer, take the time to assess if your writing is too much. To consider if the goals you’ve set yourself are workable with your current life situation. There’s no shame in dialing things back. If writing 250 words a day is too much, consider reducing it to 200. Or adding in more days off. Or considering a lower pressure project. Writing short fiction instead of tackling The Novel.

Most of all, remember that a solid writing practice is first of all a healthy one. So take care of yourself.

—Maree

Subscribe to my substack to make sure you don't miss a post, chat with me on the WIP Project discord, and tag any posts you make about the challenge with #slomowrino if you want me to see them!

#slowmowrino #bad brain days #writing advice

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theepoetspoem · 9 months ago

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I bite my nails now. A disgusting habit I thought I'd kicked when I was 12 and looked over and saw how beautiful long nails looked on the girl who sat next to me in social studies. It's kind of wild that social studies as a class exists, when it stands as the study of social relationships and the functioning of society. We learned about it for a minimum of six years, and then we go out into the world and see what we see now. History repeats itself in a new color and we all cry collectively as a community about the things we can't fix, bc despite the idea of democracy, we really don't function as one. I have things to blame. So many. But even at a very base level, how can so many be neutral to genocide?

I bite my nails now. The anxiety is subsiding. I read an article about how anxiety is like living as a trauma doctor. Each day you see the worst, and you fix it. You stitch, patch, administer, heal and then go again. One day it's slow. There's no patient sitting in need. But the adrenaline is still there. The readiness to deal with another catastrophe. Bc you know there'll be one. That feeling doesn't go away.

I bite my nails now. "It's called complex post traumatic stress disorder". I hear the word "trigger" and cringe. Mostly bc the only womxn I really hear use that word, are the yt ones who want so badly to be a victim in a world that caters and holds them in safety. I think about my actual triggers. I hear three kinds of specialists lay them out in front of me. The scientist that I am, picks them up, looks them over and nods. "Your findings are sound". I agree. I have triggers. "How do I fix this?". The specialists look back at me. "In short, you'll need to learn to love yourself".

I bite my nails now. As we go over my case plan. Meds. Therapy. Possible IOP. Group. EMDR. Did no one else notice I needed this much help? A woman on the television set talks about how there was a surge of need for mental health workers since the beginning of the pandemic. I laugh knowing I've gone through this entire process before, decades ago. Decades. I am aged. Now we all need help. It was only a matter of time after the fourth catastrophe of our generation hit.

I bite my nails now. As I listen to my therapist go on about loving myself. I think of how often I use a filter in my photos alone. How many likes and comments I get. I think of how I've even made pocket change convincing others that my nose and chin are smaller. That my skin is smooth. That the circles under my eyes don't exist. I hear the love of my life tell me I'm beautiful. Sorrow fills my heart, because I feel for a man who deserves much better than falling in love with someone who looks like me. I shake my head. Try to remove the thought like an etch a sketch. Why am I so mean to myself?

I bite my nails now.

I tell myself I'll stop.

I tell myself so much.

#prsnl

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an-obligatory-blog · 7 months ago

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theoretical post-forces infinite that caters to my specific tastes

i'm too lazy to render this, so just deal with my messy sketch and om level foreshortening

I've been mulling lately how I would want Infinite to return and although I can't see it actually happening (it assumes settings regarding Infinite's past that I basically made up, see: my jackal squad hcs), I do want to jot some these ideas down somewhere so here it is.

Me after several edits: ok uh a lot of yapping happened bc I have a lot of thoughts, but I'm going try to keep this as tl;dr as possible

Me after even MORE edits: holy shit it's still long

The premise is as follows (I wrote this messily, but I wanted to finish this thing asap):

After his defeat, Infinite was trapped inside the real Phantom Ruby in a space is akin to Null Space. Contemplating Sonic's words, who told him that his illusions cannot match the real deal (the power of friendship om), he attempts to create illusions with "souls" on a whim (he had nothing better to do), and only succeeded when he created imitations of the Jackal Squad, who he knew inside and out. Believing that breaking out was impossible and that his captivity was somewhat deserved anyways (for failing the Doctor), he grew complacent in this new fantasy, creating not only his squad, but their ideal world. He re-adopts the name "Zero", interpreting this space as the "afterlife" and thus had no issue of taking the name of a "dead man".

The Phantom Ruby was sent back in time with Classic Sonic (Mania Plus), but Zero still remained and continued to remain even as enough time had passed for it to be the Modern Timeline again. During those years, Zero doesn't age, living out in his ideal world with his squad, who evolved to become stronger than real counterparts. Unlike Chaos/Metal Sonic/Zavok/Shadow, who were created with the data Eggman provided, Zero put a lot of thought into the imitations of his squad, using his memory as the basis to nail down their strengths and weaknesses, their habits and personalities, and more. However, this doesn't last forever, as a piece of his subconscious manifested as "Infinite", who was unsatisfied with the current circumstances and wishes to break out.

Zero and Infinite eventually confront each other. Although Infinite is representative of his cruelty, he also represented his will to live. When Zero had his breakdown about weakness back when he lost to Shadow, he tried to reach out to his squad, who he thought were just out of commission, only to find them dead in a crater. They died because Shadow used Chaos Blast as at the time, it was the most efficient way to get rid of them and overcome their teamwork. He had no hatred nor malice for the Squad and was thus indifferent to whether they had lived or died. If they had lived from the initial blast, he had no reason to run back to check on them when there is a mission to complete. To put simply, they were scrapped as if they were Egg pawns and the only reason Zero lived was because such measures weren't necessary to take out one person. This power gap instilled despair within Zero, who desired to be on top of the world.

When Eggman offered him the Phantom Ruby, a gem that can turn his dreams into reality, it was like the light of hope to him. It wasn't just physical weakness he wanted to throw away-- he wanted to start fresh, abandoning his past attachment to his squad, which was causing him much pain (this also leads him to abandoning his hatred for Shadow, since someone who wasn't attached wouldn't hate). "Zero", in his mind, should've died with his squad as they were only separated by coincidence. Even though he knew the dangers of being attached in a profession seeped in death, the squad was everything to him. "Infinite", his new identity, will be the Empire's new weapon and it's through that newfound purpose will he repair his ego. Shadow was so self-assured with his power that he had the luxury of being indifferent to whether his enemies lived or died, and Infinite wanted power where he could do the same and avoid being on the other end. It's not an exaggeration to say that "Infinite" could not exist without the Ruby.

Back to the present, Infinite threatens to tear this space apart and to take back his place as the "real" one. Zero criticizes Infinite, saying that he couldn't back up his bravado even with the Ruby, failing to end the war despite everything being in his favor. It is proof that his (their) incompetence is insurmountable and that they are better off stay here (staying dead) instead of chasing dreams that can't come true.

Infinite retorts that at least he tried. Even among "trash", those who fight to the end are worth more than those who do nothing but cower, accepting death when their cushy lives are destroyed. As a mercenary, Zero heavily relied on teamwork to establish his squad's reputation to make up for his personal weakness, even going as far as "deluding himself" for finding pride in being "a good leader", which didn't mean anything at the face of Shadow's ultimate power. Even if it all ended in failure, he was only defeated by a hair's margin-- a single oversight that allowed one of the Ruby prototypes to land in the hands of the Rookie. They could try again.

The mention of "the Rookie" gave Zero a pause. Now that he thought about it, he too was in a similar position as his past self, and yet he came out on the winning end. Wasn't it just because he had friends like Sonic to hide behind? No, he remembered fighting him alone in Metropolis, and although the Rookie was nowhere close to defeating him at the time, he drastically changed from the anxious pup he first met. It doesn't matter if he credits Sonic's encouragement because at the end of the day, you can only fight with power that you own. The Rookie didn't die because he found strength, and it would be an insult to himself to assume otherwise.

As those thoughts sit in the back of his mind, Zero argues that the Resistance wouldn't fall for the same strategy twice. Infinite still had that attitude where he thinks he's insurmountably strong and that it would always stay that way even as his enemies grew stronger. That attitude led to complacency, his illusionary imitations being the stagnant set of data it always was. Even if he escaped, would he even keep the power that he enjoyed before? The link between their Ruby prototype and the power source was most certainly broken by now.

"But we don't need that. After merging with the real Ruby, you were still able to make all of this just fine, right?"

And yet, how can he be so certain that it'll stay that way when they get out? Between Zero's pessimism and Infinite's optimism, it seemed as though the fight would never end.

Then, they both heard a familiar voice from the distance. A small pack of jackals were calling them over.

"Your attachment to them is weakness. They would just hold you back."

The phantom pain of the past was something Zero didn't need to be reminded of, but once again, the face of that Rookie came to mind. Even if he credited the support of others, didn't he have to overcome loss with his own strength? On the other hand, Infinite continues to deny that the squad had nothing to do with him, as if their deaths wasn't one of the causes of his existence.

Yes, at the end of the day, he and Infinite were the same person. Infinite was created to keep him going after being broken down and the fact that he's back means it's the same thing all over again. It occurred to him that Zero wasn't satisfied with paradise anymore. It became stagnant like the world he hated and promised to shake from the ground up. The real Jackal Squad would've wanted to break out.

Infinite is right... but not completely. Zero tried a different approach.

"So what? Even if I made them disappear, I won't ever forget them. They are coming with us, like it or not. Maybe, they can even be our strength."

"You're making the same mistake as before. The power of others isn't you own."

"No. The real Jackal Squad is dead. These people belong to me-- they are mine."

They were clumsy imitations at first, based on nothing but vague recollections, but that's not the case anymore. "He wouldn't say that; she wouldn't do that." "He would do this; she would fight like this." "He would improve like so; I would teach her like this." Sentiments like that built up after years and years and it shaped them into. No matter how hard he tried to reject his connection to his Squad, vowing to evolve beyond them, he remembered all of their quirks by heart and even the kind of people they strived to be. This new Jackal Squad is his creation, through and through.

"You can call it fake all you want, but how is it any more real than what you were doing before? Relying on power given by someone else? Using data given by someone else? Even those huge snake things we made bore a mask that was made by someone else. But our memory of them, no matter how much we hate it, will always be real."

Infinite and Zero are the same person. No matter how much Infinite pretends that Zero is dead, he was always there, just dormant. If Infinite is going to surpass his limits, then he needed to break out of that close-minded illusion of strength.

"If you're going to leave this place, don't be so sure it's going to be easy. The world isn't kind to villains like us."

Evolution isn't effortless, but there is hope. Infinite's and Zero's shared pride cannot accept that they can't do what an ordinary wolf can.

"If you don't want to fail all over again, take all of us with you."

"If that's what you want, then don't let them go. I'll keep living with or without you."

Infinite/Zero's internal reconciliation led to him breaking paradise from the inside, tearing a hole into the false sky. It was the whole-hearted will of its master, after all. Infinite/Zero chases after the light and right behind him were the illusions.

In the middle of nowhere, Infinite woke up alone.

Infinite conjured his mask and puts it on. Even after accepting Zero, he felt more comfortable like this. He looks down and notices that the Ruby in his chest changed from red to magenta, the color of the real Phantom Ruby.

Knowing what he wants, he found his way back to Eggman. He doesn't hold a grudge against him for what he did because he knew about his "Plan B" ahead of time. At the time, he wanted to rectify the mistake he made (missing one prototype he didn't destroy) with his own hands, but it was him who agreed to be Eggman's weapon and gave him the right to do that should he fail. Plus, it's Eggman who knew the Ruby best and despite everything, their goals still aligned.

The doctor was of course surprised to see Infinite walking around and Infinite was surprised to see a little girl next to him when he returned. After relaying what happened to him, Eggman analyzed his body as he requested.

The real Phantom Ruby merged with him, so he doesn't need a power source to use a fuel, however his innate powers are limited. Instead of the overwhelming army he was able to make before, conjuring his 4 former squad mates and a sword was the best he can muster. He's certainly more powerful than average and he can now truly call his powers as his own, but it's very far from the heights he once reached. Knowing that he had less promise than before, Infinite had little confidence that the doctor would take it well, but before he sacrificed his pride....

"...But even this is fine. By losing abundance, you were pushed to become more efficient-- the data I'm getting from your illusions are far more complex than what you made before. They're extremely lifelike, and yet incomparable to their real counterparts... yes, I'd be a fool to not invest in this. I'd lose next to nothing." Infinite didn't know it, but the new illusions reminded Eggman of Sage.

"Is it really fine with my track record?" Infinite said that half-heartedly, but unexpectedly, Eggman took it seriously.

"If you're going to put yourself down for that, then what does it say about me, who has yet to succeed in world domination? There's a reason why I keep Metal Sonic around and scrapped the other models. There's a difference between the two."

"Honestly, who do you think I am? The type of person who lies to comfort someone who had failed me before? Bah! I have an empire to run and a world to conquer, so if I say that you have potential, then I mean it! With my intellect, there's no way I'm mistaken."

"So enough with that self-pity party because it doesn't suit you, Infinite. You have the confidence of the world's future ruler. Shouldn't you act like it as his general?"

Eggman's acceptance made him feel something he didn't think he was capable of feeling. Once more, for a third time, they came to an agreement. The enemy that Sonic and friends thought was long gone returned.

Uno's efficiency, Deux's patience, Trois's bravery, Quatre's ambition... Zero's sense of responsibility and Infinite's stubbornness... although they all referred to each other as numbers, their lives and potential were worth much more, and they will always last as long as Infinite lived to remember them.

If names determined one's destiny, that Sonic will always be the wind you can't catch and that Shadow will always be the darkness that points toward the light, then Infinite will always be the sum everything that came before him, their undying dreams pushing him forward, marching towards a future that never ends.

#infinite the jackal #sonic the hedgehog #sth headcanons #sonic forces #sth #infinite the jackal hcs #it kinda turned into a fic but i don't write fic like this so om #should i put a name on this? it's not like an au but like #i'll come up with one later #there might be a hint of infidget bias in here eheh #i really want infinite to stay as a villain you have no idea ommm

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cygninae · 1 year ago

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Hi! 👋 Could you please do 20 and 23 for the Quagmire triplets for the character ask game? :)

Hi Ven ! Sure !!

20 (Weird headcanon)

Quigley

i have literally SO many headcanons for Quigley but I'll try and hold back and only share a few. (I'll refer to Quigley with they pronouns because that is my headcanon !)

if they had been raised in the 2000s, would absolutely have thomas the tank engine or cars bedsheets. so embarrassing

couldn't take serious photos, always had to be pulling a face or doing bunny ears or something

tried to pierce their ears with a safety pin and lemon (did not go well.)

disastrous handwriting. Like incomprehensible.

Isadora

gay awakening was Veronia Lake in I Married A Witch (dir. René Clair)

went through a goth phase (after discovering Mary Shelley and Edgar Allen Poe) where she attempted to dye all of her clothes black. They came out brown.

Duncan

tried to pull a prank on Carmelita Spats by balancing a bucket of water on a doorframe and have her walk through, getting drenched. Forgot to let himself out of the room first and drenched himself.

obsessed with lava lamps

23 (Future headcanon)

Quigley

felt so betrayed by Jacques leaving, that they completely turned away from VFD. Lost a lot of their love for cartography and it took a long time for it to come back. They began to prefer sketching landscapes and people they loved.

discovered David Bowie (this depends on your theory of when ASOUE is set) and he changed their life. Became obsessed with Ziggy Stardust and embraced gender fluidity through makeup, piercings, shiny clothes, etc. learnt to love themself :)

finally got that ear piercing they had botched when they were younger.

actually became really good friends with Fiona. She taught them that it was okay to view the world with more criticism. They got along and were actually really similar. Bickered a lot.

moved to a big city with Duncan and Isadora and got really into the world of music, art, freedom, self-expression. They probably joined a band at some point, no doubt.

Isadora

in the big city, joined a sapphic society and made friends who loved poetry (and girls).

got her poetry published in the paper on multiple occasions, but anonymously. She wanted to spread the beauty of poetry without getting attention for it.

opened up to the idea of writing prose too, and learnt that she was really talented in that area, too, joining writing societies and book clubs and learning so much more about literature. it gave her the opportunity to express herself in more ways than one.

her and Klaus (if reunited) absolutely became an unstoppable best friend duo. They were practically unseperable, and he was in a lot of the same book clubs with her. He worked at one of their local libraries and let her sneak in the back to write in the staff room while he ate his lunch or read on his break.

Duncan

aside from writing journalism, he actually got really into photojournalism. He loved the peace of the dark room and the process of developing photos. He got into the habit of photographing his friends and siblings to immortalise them and kept his favourite pictures in his shirt pocket.

got an internship at a newspaper (NOT the daily punctillio, lol) and had a niche in foreign correspondence, (with the rise in use of the telephone) and he made so many connections across the world. Learning about so many cultures gave him a sense of freedom after feeling so trapped post the death of his parents.

and a dunklaus headcanon, since I can't hold back: after he and Klaus started dating, he would very occasionally sneak coded messages into the newspaper, just sappy stuff saying he missed him and hoped he was having a great day :)

interviewed Lemony Snicket once without knowing it was him.

This was so much fun !! Thanks so much for asking :)

#asoue #lemony snicket #a series of unfortunate events #asks #unfortunate gen #quigley quagmire #duncan quagmire #isadora quagmire #headcanons

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ryuichirou · 3 months ago

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Hello, 💜🌹 anon here! I don’t send asks too often but I’m pretty sure that’s the emojis I used lol.

Idk if you’ve been asked this before but was there ever a point you felt apprehensive or nervous about making NSFW art? If so how did you work through it? It’s ok if you don’t have an answer or it’s too personal. I’m just looking to work through some of my own hang ups so I figured I’d ask.

-💜🌹

Hi, 💜🌹 Anon ! It’s good to hear from you; thank you for your ask!

I think I talked about a similar topic at some point, but I since it’s been a long time, I don’t mind talking about it again.

To be honest, I feel like I only had moments of doubt and anxiousness when it comes to sharing art, not creating it. Over the years there were periods during which we wouldn’t post any smut at all, and sometimes we would gather some courage and start spamming it, some other time we created a separate acc for nsfw stuff; I feel like we went through everything lol But no matter what happens with our posting, I’ve always been drawing smut behind the curtains. Fortunately and thankfully, when it comes to art, for the most part I am pretty shameless lol

I was the most nervous about drawing spicy stuff back when I was a teen because I really wanted to start doing it, but it was very intimidating + I felt like I was doing something bad, like I wasn’t supposed to draw it because of how young I was + because it’s inappropriate in general. It’s silly to think about this now… But my very first nsfw sketches had this stupid censor round emoji-like thingie that Katsu absolutely fucking hated LOL

I wasn’t even posting this stuff anywhere, Katsu was the only one who saw those sketches! Who I was censoring it for??

In actuality, I think it was me being very shy about drawing explicit stuff, so those ugly things kind of helped me to get used to drawing smut.

To answer your question… I think it depends on why you have those hang-ups and what exactly prevents you from drawing things that you want to draw.

If it’s that you are not confident in your skill, then don’t worry about it and take it easy. One good thing about nsfw is that it’s pretty fun to study, be it irl/photo references or other people’s art.

If it’s you being uncomfortable or embarrassed, try not to stress yourself out too much; similarly to what I did, draw something that isn’t as embarrassing to draw: a lot of people draw hot stuff without ever picturing genitalia. It’s art, after all.

If you feel ashamed, please don’t be? I know I make it sound easy, but smut and kinky drawings/stories are a pretty natural thing. Even artists who are known for drawing cute things or animating cartoons have a lot of nsfw drawings, the majority of which we’ll never see lol

If you are anxious about sharing your stuff, then don’t do it for now or create a small locked acc for it, or just draw for yourself and your friends for some time. You know, low stakes, high rewards – you’ll develop a habit and comfortability, which is a very important base to build before diving into this.

Whatever is the case, ask yourself whether you really want to draw it or not; because ultimately this is the only reason that matters.

Oh! Watch “Quills” (2000), I feel like it could also give you a nice morale boost lol At least in terms of realising that there is nothing weird or unusual in this kind of interest…

If you want me to elaborate on any of those points or have any more questions, please let me know.

Thank you!

#replies #about drawing

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i-never-forgot · 10 months ago

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I wanted to ask for curiosity sake BUT!!! What does Lu wear/look like when he’s evolved into a fully fledged Lucario? We’ve seen Eliana but I don’t think we’ve seen him yet, and I’m SUPER interested :O

I’m not great at drawing Pokes besides Eevee (especially from memory) so the one other time I’ve drawn a Lucario recently I decided…not to post it🥲

But! I don’t give Lu enough attention (plus I’ve been meaning to post some more refined sketches of this duo), so…here you go!😊

Team Relic!

I’ve previously shied away from giving them any specific identifying features because I am frankly terrified of unique character design (I’ve never been particularly good at it tbh…I always draw a blank on what I could include that wouldn’t be terribly cliche…all my OCs weep bc of this lol), but I decided to try my hand at it.

Eliana as an Eevee is taller than average, perhaps the greatest indicator of her physical age despite being a first form Pokémon (still tiny tho). Her paws are a darker shade of brown, similar to the tone in the inside of her ears, and instead of having a somewhat coarse, stiff, straight fur like most Eevee, hers is smoother, silkier, and almost curly (to reflect the texture of her hair as a human more closely). Her fur is also a tad longer, so some of these errant cowlicks are visible. She wears the knot of her scarf in the front sometimes because she does (thankfully) have enough dexterity to tie it on her own, but it takes her a while. Most of the time Lu does it for her.

[Lu develops a habit of either smoothing down said curls with his paws or introducing her to the concept of mutual grooming as a response to either of their occasional insomniac episodes or when one of them is anxious, but only in the privacy of their room. Otherwise, he keeps a paw between her shoulder blades under her ruff and strokes the fur under his pads as a self-soothing tactic, such as when running into Team Skull.]

As a Leafeon she grows extra lithe and lanky, so she has a bit of fawn clumsiness at first because she’d gotten so used to her shorter legs. Her nose scar from Grovyle is fully healed by this point, so it’s faded a bit, but she hadn’t been able to see the dead patch of skin where Dusknoir’s Ice Punch frostbit the flesh around her throat and rendered it hairless before, so she wears something over it almost all the time bc she hates the reminder.

[Later on she continues to wear it bc it distresses Dusknoir to see it a whole lot—it’s hard to coax him back from his guilty spirals, so she only goes “naked” when her things need to be washed after exploring.]

[She doesn’t even realize she has to allow herself time to photosynthesize a certain amount of time per day so the first week she couldn’t figure out why she felt so awful until Sunflora pointed out that her ears and tail looked a bit wilted. Sun baths and afternoon naps become a main stay after that point, although Lu does have to occasionally remind her when she starts to feel down without realizing she’d forgotten to do so.]

[She feels a little naked without her ruff because she’d grown the habit of tucking her chin/mouth into it when stressed out, so when she swaps her Guild scarf for a Virid Collar, she’s grateful to have the extra fabric to nuzzle into when she’s overwhelmed.]

[She can also contort into the oddest shapes to sleep. Lu can’t understand it, but it’s because she and Treecko would often have to wedge themselves into crevices and cracks to rest.]

Lu is pretty much your run-of-the-mill Riolu, although he’s a little slimmer and taller with a bit of a longer narrower snout.

However, when he evolves into Lucario, he fleshes out and gets a bit bulkier after all the exploring they’ve done. His chest spike is broken in an accident, and he develops early gray hair along his muzzle (losing your best friend prematurely to sudden vaporization will certainly affect your stress toleration in the long run huh).

[His fur thickens up in the winter and he’s the best to snuggle with, but given the fact that Treasure Town is coastal it rarely actually gets cold enough to last the whole night without having to peel yourself away for a chance to breathe.]

Let me know if there are any other details or questions you wonder about :)

#fisara’s answers #ao3: in the morning light #pokemon #pokemon mystery dungeon #explorers of sky #my art #eevee/eliana #riolu/lu #lucario/lu #leafeon/eliana

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