#trust when i get the job im trying for im out because ill be getting payed what my dad is

[arolesbianism]

Just wanted to drop in and say thank you for finding and posting the ONI logs that you do! As someone who loves the story of the game but absolutely would not have the energy to find all of the logs that aren’t on the wiki legitimately its nice to be able to see some of them. The one w/ nails in it is especially interesting! Nails was already one of my favorite dupes but that log made me like them even more tbh. Everyone say thank you to Human Nails™️ for making dupes like actually cognizant.

Also, saw your ONI stuff on artfight! I am absolutely not plotting and scheming anything at all i swear :]

Oghhhh tysm :')!!!! I've been feeling a bit self conscious abt my oni obsession lately so this means a lot! I still need to get around to making my oni story catalogue actually readable, I started a while back but ran out of steam after the like 50th incident with said one with Nails in it lol. And I actually recognized you from artfight! Saw your oni guys a few days ago and I'm honestly obsessed with them, it would be a shame if I had my hand forced and had to draw them :3c

[xianzhoualliance]

my mom is such a bitch i hate her so much

[changbinsboobs]

Changbin as husband is next I'm curious for his and hyunjinss

This is the longest fucking reading I've ever had so i just HAD to split it in 2 parts so bear with me. I love him but i hate him right now😩 (no i don't)

Husband Series: Changbin pt. 1

Ugh...that guy🫠 i bet you if i let him use up my whole deck he would. The amount of "ok last card" i had to say...and yet there was still so much gushing put...and ugh, i just can't stress enough how much into details he is and how much he wants to stress on them and make sure they don't go unnoticed or get misunderstood or overlooked. Reminds me so much of my audhd friend😭. Anyways back on track - tho i don't even know where to begin from, i really think he used up half my deck. I just counted 23 cards😳 i do indeed draw a lot for the others too but thats just next level. Not on topic but i think he's a really chatty drunk😂 now i wanna read on them when drunk🙌🏻😂

Ok soooo since i have so many cards ill try to combine them as much as i can and keep the messages as concise as possible so this post doesn't become a novel - the overall energy i noticed here is not so much emphasis on him as a husband but overall him as a partner in a committed relationship. Which leads me to believe he himself doesn't view marriage with such dread as the others did (there wasn't really any dread with felix bust still a certain anxiety around responsibilities, meanwhile that with changbin is absolutely nonexistent). I would say he seems himself as capable and even ready to take on that responsibility and role if the opportunity presents itself and i think he believes he'll do a good job. He's responsible, capable and can take care of it. I actually sense a feeling of pride in him about that.

Another MAJOR theme is him being a "simp" for his partner (he insists on wife). There are many cards that im trying to sum up:

He's very protective over her and doesn't let anyone say shit about her, he's giving me guard dog vibes. Also a big bodyguardy. I can see him when being out with her eyeing people and being on alert and just idk, looking scary as to scare of any weirdos before they even think about trying something. And to clear any misunderstandings up, im really not getting this coming from jealousy (not that its not there, it is😂, but its just 10% reason, out of 100), but rather because he wants the woman he loves to feel safe and protected around him. He wants her to be able to relax and trust that he will always have her back and keep her safe. He wants her pretty little witty head not to be bothered by ANYTHING!

More from the simpy train - looks up to her a lot and kinda puts her a bit on a pedestal. This is not a very debilitating energy but feels rather like something he has made peace with and accepts - which is that she is indeed better than him and he can never be able to reach her, which means he is incredibly lucky and appreciative of the fact a woman like that has chosen him and he tries whatever he can to live up to her standard and continue to give her reasons to stay with him and continue to love him. Although she can never love him as much as he does (thats his thought🥲). But as i said this doesn't feel victimy to me at all but rather just seems realistic to him and he's a big boy and can accept reality for what it is and choose to feel lucky instead of beating himself up for not being good enough and self sabotage. Im actually really shocked looking at his energy because i can really feel the strength of his mind and ughh just how innovative and flexible he is. His will is just astounding and making me really happy, despite him obviously having some issues he doesn't let himself be defined by it and chooses to spin them to him favor. What an amazing guy💗

Back to the reading - so he spends a lot of time in his head, doing A LOT of 2 things. One is being thinking of his girl and what he can do to make her happy, analyzing previous conversations to see if he missed something or if he has remembered everything. Contemplating if she maybe gave him a hint about something, or if she maybe looked hesitant with something. Maybe her body language was off? He notes that. If there was any difference in her behaviour today, if she looked different. He's really putting LOTS of energy thinking about her and analyzing her and her behaviour. Again this doesn't seem to come from distrust (although he thinks of that as well, its just not his motivator, he just considers everything, thats why) but rather for his own feeling of safety. I think he is a very thoughtful and analyzing and sensitive person in nature so this may be something he always does, except when its something very important to him, and a relationship at that - he does it even more intensely. He doesn't only think about and analyze her tho. He does that to him too, to their relationship as well. He just wants to have a good understanding and overview of everything that is happening in the relationship so he has a sense of control and safety. You can always fix something if you know its broken. Or beginning to bend. You can fix the problem before the branch brakes i think is what he wants to say. And he wants things to run as smoothly as possible with them, and once again he has taken on the responsibility to make his girls life as easy and carefree as possible and how can that happen if he leaves the whole relationship in her hands?! He can't, so he doesn't his part very diligently and tries to keep up on the same level as her, emotional-intelligence-wise.

He also doesn't to just thinking but planing & organizing. So i think he takes lots of care for other stuff too like planing and booking fun dates. If he cant attend then books fun stuff for her. Provide her with the needed tools/means for her to be able to create, to indulge in her hobbies. He really loves that feminine creator energy and really wants to do his best to encourage and provide an encouraging environment for his wife to get in her feminine creator energy and bring him joy with it. Also thats really random but he's always ready and loves giving her massages😂💗(after her long day of crafting). He just loves hearing about it, seeing the excitement in her voice and face. It charges him.

He also spends lots of time fantasizing about her. Reminiscing wonderful dates, imagining potential future ones, creating scenarios etc. He's just A LOT in his head, his mind is really really active, and its very occupied with his love. Also another random message, commitment and love are tied with him somehow. Im seeing he cant commit if he doesn't love but he also cant love if he can't commit. So i would say he's very extreme-y. Like he's either all in or all out. No middle ground. What i mean is he HAS to be this intense in a relationship because for him thats commitment, THATS expressing love. And if he's not able to do that, then his love and interest and enthusiasm begin to fade away. He HAS to be able to be like that in a relationship and i think often he has been labeled (or was) just WAYYY TOO MUCH for the girls he has been in a relationship with. Im seeing he can get very overwhelming and overbearing if the person he's with just isn't the person to enjoy that kind of commitment and effort. But to go back to the cards, he also fantasizes about physical stuff too, for example he's riding in the car, and for the whole ride he's imagining and giggling and wiggling his feet and twirling his hairs because he plays over and over how that one time while they were still just dating she looked him in the eyes with that wet sexy look, and how his whole body got shivers and his stomach dropped and his heart skipped and his palms got sweaty and he swears some saliva started dripping out the corner of his mouth and his knees got weak and he almost felt like he was gonna black out and by the time he came back to his senses she was already sooo close to his lips and them BAM. Fireworks everywhere. He can never forget how that wonderful kiss felt and how sweet the sexual tension and anticipation before it was. He plays stuff like that OVER AND OVER again the whole damn day.

While being on physical stuff, he is pretty horny ill say. But not in a bunny way,m where he wants to fuck 5 times a day, but rather when around his girl he's always half way up, always ready to rise for the occasion iykwim. I think he gets *excited*👀 very easily and is just really weak when it comes to his girl. He's always ready to deliver whenever she ask, whatever she asks. Als im seeing once again he's a giver (and despite him loving head so much) he's focused on her pleasure and he can off just from watching her enjoy...whatever it is. So yeah thats that😂

Bro im so tired im thinking about doing this in 2 parts😭 im just halfway. Ok yk what im splitting it.

[tethered-heartstrings]

Something i could never understand is...why do people want Jack to die???

Jack is an obstacle plenty of times and is sort of flippant about Will's state of mind in the beginning, but in all fairness he was trying to stop a MURDERER and I could see how he would value saving lives over Will's health. (Not saying it was right of him, but I get it. And Alana does rightfully chew him out to a point.)

Its clear he just assumes that Will not wanting to be involved im the mass murders is a natrual response to seeing all of that stuff, Jack has no idea that Will and Hannibal are having murder husband fantasy dates until the later seasons. Which in all fairness, he has a right to be concerned about lol

People villainize Jack for a lot of reasons, and only want to see the bad in him. People hate him because he's a cop (okay, so is Will, and everyone else on the team for that matter but only seems to apply to Jack?), because he didn't take care of Will's mental instability/deterioration (as if Will isn't a grown man who should/could stand up for himself and admit to Jack when he isn't doing well), because he was "too dumb to see Will was Very Obviously Ill" (as if we the audience don't get special privileges on what happens behind closed doors and Jack is just supposed to read minds), because he was a criminal investigator "too dumb to not see it was Hannibal all along" (as if Hannibal didn't manipulate literally everyone in his vicinity to make himself look normal and stable and safe and trustworthy), because he "doesn't care about Will" (as if this wasn't literal manipulation Hannibal whispered to Will during his mental breakdown to drive a wedge between him and Jack), because he isn't perfect and he isn't allowed to be flawed, and tbh a big factor of it is racism. and many more reasons.

Of course Jack has flaws, that's what being a human being is. Everyone on the show has faults, but people focus and amplify only the characters they don't like. Hannibal, and to be honest Will also, are literally right there in the same frame and are horrible people, who have done so much worse than Jack. But people don't want to be critical of their faves. Hannibal fans often also have like, main character specific lens so only their favorites are talked about highly and everyone else is dragged through the mud (Jack, Alana, even Abigail) and are not allowed to be seen as a multifaceted character. (admittedly, the women on the show are very poorly written which can contribute to this for the female characters of the show but I digress)

Jack genuinely wants to do something good, he wants to save lives, and he wants to so badly he can get horseblinders on and focus too much on the end goal and not on the path itself. That isn't evil though. He does care about Will, and in a very dad-like way he wants what is best for him but it isn't entirely through Will's lens ir his best interest. He trusted that Will would talk to him, and Will didn't. Like sure he hinted the job wasn't good for him and it was affecting him but that isn't specifically saying "hey Jack, I have headaches that won't go away, I can't sleep, I am sleepwalking, I am losing time, I am scared. Help me." Yeah, looking at horribly mutilated bodies all day isn't good for anyone. He tried to get Will genuine help, by setting him up with a well-renowned psychiatrist per someone else's recommendation. He tried, but Hannibal didn't do his job. He lied to Jack saying Will was fine, rubberstamped him sane. What is Jack supposed to do? Call him a liar? A well respected professional in the field? Be real. And to your point, again, Will never said how bad he actually was, so it makes sense Jack is doing his job and prioritizing saving lives.

Jack also didn't want to believe Will was guilty. The evidence was piled so high against him they eclipsed the sun. Jack is smart, his entire job is finding evidence to lead to a conclusion. He can't just suddenly turn a blind eye because it's Will. Jack was willing to risk his career to help him, a career that took decades and immense hard work to achieve. He then trusted Will and Will betrayed him. He wanted to trust in him until the very end. People get mad at Jack for not trusting Will but then call him dumb for trusting him later like lol what the fuck do you want?

Jack also knows when he messed up. He lives with the guilt of Miriam going missing forever, he knows he fucked up and makes it a point not to make that mistake again. He isn't careless. He cares for the people he works with. You could see it in his face how devastated he was when Beverly died, when Will was arrested. Even thinking about Miriam. There is a tenderness in him being the one to take off Will's mask and straight jacket, as an act of humanizing Will and saying "I trust you".

Jack is also a good husband who loved his wife. Yes, his job kept him away from home a lot, but Bella isn't dumb and she knew what his job entailed. He took care of her as best as he could. He wanted to do anything to support her after her cancer diagnosis, he was always in her corner. Of course he wanted her to do chemotherapy, of course he didn't want her to die. He didn't want to lose the love of his life and traverse the world alone, his most trusted and longtime support system gone. He broke the law to smoke weed with her and join her, and be a part of her care and comfort. And in the end, he did the hardest thing by letting her go so she wasn't in pain anymore. It wasn't passive, it wasn't that she died and he just watched. He pushed the plunger to give her peace. He is a human being capable of compassion and love and care.

People forget we have the audience view, so we see Hannibal being manipulative and murdering, and we see Will wake up from nightmares covered in sweat and sleepwalking. But the characters in the show aren't us! They only see what is in front of them or told to them. And they act like if they weren't in the same shoes they wouldn't do the exact same stuff.

To put it shortly, Jack is a complex and flawed character, as is literally everyone on the show and people in real life. He genuinely tries his best and wants to do good things in the world. He is sooo far from the worst character on the show (I argue he might be the most morally stable and centered) but is made out to be the worst person ever, when he isn't. He doesn't deserve to die, and he doesn't deserve to be murdered. He deserves a nice, peaceful, retirement (or vacation, not sure he could stay away tbh especially now that Bella has died) and to be left the fuck alone.

[just-a-floofy-catt]

I feel like i haven't posted in forever again TwT

I found an old GlitterGolf idea drabble that I wrote after reading a really good fic about them buried in the depths of my phone so uh...

*throws it at you*

Omg a glittergolf fic with judgemental, sassy, hw2-esque Sun

So like, not only is there the trope of Monty disliking him and thinking hes annoying asf and a weird freak,  but now instead of being oblivious and nice, Sun returns the same energy, thinking that Monty is a selfish brute who shouldnt be trusted around children. Like, he'll make very off  comments about him and just spend the whole time scowling and trying to shoo him out XD

So, like, imagine there's a thing going on at the daycare.

Where, as almost like, a way to bring more business in and shit, theyve started having a daily thing where one of the glams will visit the kids there and do an activity with them for an hour or so. Usually its Freddy, sometimes its Chica, and rarely its Roxy. This is the first opportunity that Sun really gets to meet them, and it actually goes really well. Sun absolutely adores Freddy, has a new bestie in chica, and shockingly has some good banter and an unlikely friendship with Roxy.

However, theres a day where Freddy has to go for energency maintenence, and the others are all booked for parties.

Leaving only Monty free to do it.

Now, Monty has never done one of the shifts before, because he doesnt do well with the younger kids. Both because hes scary to alot of them, and because he also just doesnt really know how to deal with them. Maybe deep down theres even a deep rooted fear of hurting them 👀👀👀

(There definitely is)

But so he is absolutely NOT excited to go.

Despite the way that the rest of the Glams praise up Sunny and how great he is, Monty does not care and still views him as the same annoying freak he always did, despite not having met him yet.

So, he shows up and Sun opens the door all cheery being like "Oh hello Freddy! Youre a bit late i was worried you werent gonna show up and-"

And then he clocks that its monty.

"Oh."

He immediately glares down at him in pure, utter distain, voice filled with disappointment.

Monty stares back up at him with a huff, tense. If he had fur, his hackles would be absolutely raised.

Then Sun would be all like "ugh. Ew. why are you here", and Monty very bluntly explains that hes been forced to go and that Freddy is in maintenence.

Then Sun tries to shut the door on him XD

"Im sure the kids can go one day without a glamrock then! Ill let them know freddy is sick, thank you for telling me. Lovely to meet you, Montgomery!"

Monty stops the door by grabbing it stongly with his hand, scoring clawmarks into it.

"What do you think you're doing?!"

Sun scoffs at the damage

"Im the one taking over, dipshit. Im here to do my fuckin job"

The realization that hes truely stuck with Monty dawns on him, and he opens the door again, taking a deep breath.

"No swearing in the daycare..."

He spits it through gritted teeth and relents, turning his back to him and stalking away.

Then the cheery front goes back up and he completely changes XD

He introduces Monty to the kids as best as he can, but none of them really seem too interested, making him both snicker but also be incredibly frustrated that his dramatic intro didnt work.

(Also, to explain more character stuff, Sun is mostly in typical fanon form, and then uses all that hw2 sass mostly as a defence mechanism. Hes definitely got some mischief to him that he also uses it for, like banter with Roxanne, but for the most part hes a sweetheart. He gets easily frustrated with management and people that he doesnt like, but has alot of patience with activities like crafts and also with the kids. He is still like, painfully innocent and has his loopy childlike vibe, but just covers it up when he feels threatened. The best way i can describe it is that he acts like a playground bully when he doesnt like you. XD Still childish, but now just a more snarky, cold and mean version. Hes a bit cautious of some new things, although very curious. So he normally is a bit cautious around new people, but very welcoming and nice.

This is different for Monty, because of what he hears from the kids XD

Alot of them when mentioning him in passing, see Monty as scary and violent, so now thats how Sun views him. Alot of the kids see him as a threat, so now Sun does too. Hes protective of the kids, so of course hes jumped to judge someone he doesnt know based on whether the kids like him or not XD

Dont get me wrong, in some situations hed definitely try to show the kids the thing theyre scared of isnt so bad, but in the case of Monty, he has confirmation  that he can be angry and violent from the other glams and staff, so of course he still just sees him as bad lmao.

Like, the way he acts towards Monty is mostly because of mama bear instinct stuff. He sees him as a threat to the kids  so he doesnt like him.)

Enemies to lovers my beloved ✨️

But over time, Monty starts having to do it more and more, as inconveniences keep piling up, and Sun starts to kind of let his guard down, and the scathing defensiveness turns into teasing. He sees Monty actually trying to connect with some of the kids, and also after spending his whole life w Moon, understands that Monty is frustrated that theyre scared of him. He starts to see the good in Monty, and also pity him a bit.

Monty on the other hand, starts to admire how much Sunny cares about the kids, and steadily gets used to his upbeat and overly cheery demeanor. He no longer sees him as annoying, but instead, endearing.

And then theres eventually endgame GlitterGolf

[laurrelise]

i’m rewatching tua season 4 because i guess i once again need confirmation that it’s just as bad as i remember …

but ive been told im too negative about the season on more than one occasion so im going to be positive and name a bunch of things i like about each episode of the final season!! <3

warning: this post is decent sized lol

today we are tackling: episode 2

i do love the beginning montage of the siblings all being sick while simultaneously using their powers to improve their own daily agendas if only it featured more than just 3 of the siblings…?

i love five’s assistant twink and also how he’s called mr. five at the grand old age of 19 years old (i know he’s 64 but shut up)

lila’s eyeball lasers and the rubber ducky

luther being devastated over the place being “destroyed” even when it was a literal shithole to start off with

viktor finding his VOICE. viktor with CONFIDENCE. i love you viktor “ill kick your ass right now” hargreeves. king, you are 4 feet tall, but eat him tf up

“why is it cold” “the real question is, why would you touch it”

five slapping diego’s hand out of the way and him not even trying to fight it is so them and i love it

viktor actually attempting to kick ben’s ass (and as much as he looks like a feral little gremlin, i love it)

luther’s “DUDE! I LIVE HERE” he’s such a grumpus

also viktor’s little speech about him building a life for himself and it all being fucked over because of ben’s dumb ass

“i could’ve lost my job!” “did you?” “wh-” and five looking up at him with wide eyes and genuine curiosity. not the time king but thanks for asking

allison eating ben tf up and klaus supporting her

“i’m not going back to that old klaus. i like this klaus! hey, he collects coupons! he’s frugal, respectable, reliable, and most importantly, he’s a klaus that claire likes. and trusts and looks up to.” THIS IS SO SAD I LOVE HIM

diego pulling ben back to the couch by his hair is such brother behavior

i do love the wanda van. she’s truly iconic

will forever love that five gets the front seat because he’s the old man. if i were his sibling i wouldn’t even try to take it. shotgun is for the senior citizen

the gag about baby shark not being able to stop playing for the entire several-hour long road trip is pretty alright comedy-wise i guess although it would’ve been much funnier if baby shark wasn’t the main goddamn song in the entire season’s soundtrack

i will never shut up about how much i love the love-hate banter from all of the siblings. the actors did such an amazing job bringing the dysfunctional family back to life.

ben getting humbled in the diner was pretty satisfying. sparrow ben i’ve never been your biggest fan but you’ve grown on me

luther’s mention of sloane is so sweet if only she’d been mentioned more than twice

luther is generally adorable i love that man

viktor saying “phones work both ways, yknow” when allison said he didn’t call. i love how much confidence he’s found in himself this season, quite possibly one of the only characters who wasn’t horribly assassinated trait-wise

diego throwing the axes, i love him. also lila’s unimpressed reaction always gets me

klaus with the TAROT CARDS!!!!!! yes please i wish he’d used them more

i do actually like jennifer’s character. the truman-show town thing was so interesting even if it had relatively no effect on the plot for the rest of the season, it had potential but i love that jen matches ben’s freak in the sense that she is absolutely not afraid to call him out on his bullshit

old man five trying to blink :( so sad poor guy

also five immediately pretending to stretch when lila calls him out

once again i love lila and five’s reluctant alliance. why couldn’t they just continue being frenemies for the love of god

five noticing the singular guy looking at them and mentioning it to diego and lila and she says “maybe he likes you” STEVE BLACKMAN YOU COULD’VE PUT FIVE WITH ANYONE ELSE. STEVE BLACKMAN WE COULD’VE HAD A ROMANCE BETWEEN FIVE AND THE ELF STARING AT HIM AND IT WOULD’VE BEEN BETTER THAN FIVE X LILA. STEVE BLACKMAN WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME

ben defending jennifer awwwww

five’s subway station to different timelines will go down as being endlessly awesome if only it hadn’t been created solely so steve blackman could fulfill his own weird ass ideas

diego and lila once again trying to convince the other to let them save the day is a very often-overlooked sign of love that i refuse to ignore. they do it like 3 times in the show and it gets me every time

“i have laser eyes im more powerful than you!” “they’re not even working right now!” “they’re gonna work i feel it they’re gonna work!!!!” lila i love you you’re so cute

“I TOOK OUT THE TRASH” hey btw diego it’s not the time

ok but diego’s flip where he redirects all the bullets… idk how i completely forgot about that part (probably because i was busy thinking about all of the other things that i hated) but it was SO fucking awesome stfu

diego and lila collecting reindeer stuffies for the kids even while they’re fighting for their lives is still so adorable

klaus’ positive affirmations. klaus I LOVE YOU

klaus accidentally finding a fake jennifer is so on brand for him NVM HOW DID I FORGET THAT SHE LITERALLY SHOOTS KLAUS

i LOVE the part where luther’s shielding allison and viktor from the bullets. especially when viktor tears out of his grasp like a feral little gremlin and takes out half of the shooters

still don’t know what the hell allison’s power is???? is it the rumor thing except she only has to think it instead of saying it?!!? idk but it’s cool i guess just wish it was explained more!!!!!!

luther’s “i should’ve known, those sconces were too perfect” he’s all upset but i can’t help but smile he’s literally a 5 year old

the car flip is so fucking cool. the glass flying around the van around everybody is so good, the “carol of the bells” is so menacing and simple, five absolutely serving while everyone else is screaming and flinging around in the back

ALSO DIEGO’S ARM GOING OUT TO PROTECT FIVE. fuck i love them so much. STEVE BLACKMAN FUCK YOU FOR WHAT YOU DID TO FIVE AND DIEGO

jennifer’s little “help me, ben” as she gets carried away is so tragic oh my god. and his little reach out to her as she’s taken. fuck

i’ve said it before and i’ll say it again, jean and gene are such phenomenal villains. nick offerman and megan mulally are phenomenal actors. christ on a cracker why couldn’t they have been utilized in a plot that was actually written well

and that’s the end of the episode! only positivity around here folks! :)

…

just kidding here’s some of the tiny little things i caught that i don’t like / that make literally zero sense

luther screaming “no! no! no” when his monkey body is back (for some fucking reason???) is so heartbreaking the poor guy hated himself 💔

i love the whole subway station thing but how the hell did five accidentally blink into the station when he was just running but couldn’t when he was genuinely trying lmfao

it’s absolutely wild that five deadass blinked accidentally and then just hopped on the subway even though he was just running for his life. if the writers genuinely believed five wouldn’t have immediately returned to help his family and checked out the subway later then they need to be fired immediately. thanks

it will never not be funny to me that literally every single person in the town has a huge gun. was that much security really necessary 😭

the part where klaus dies and they give him marigold even though he stressed 100% that he didn’t want it makes me so sad. i get why they did it (he literally would’ve died if they hadn’t) but the panic in allison’s voice as she holds her dying brother and tries to figure out if it’s right to give it to him against his will is so heartbreaking

KLAUS’ “what did you do?” WHEN HE REALIZES HE’S GOT HIS POWERS BACK IM SOBBING

ok and that’s the end

the first couple of episodes weren’t too terrible in my opinion? so it’s understandable that i’d find plenty more things i liked than i disliked in this episode. also all the things i pointed out that i liked were tiny little details when most of the season’s flaws imo were huge arcs / plot points that span multiple episodes so they might not be as relevant in a post of this format !!

might do this when i watch the rest of the seasons to truly identify if i really am too hard on this season (i don’t believe i am considering how many much smarter people have also stressed the issues with this season but it was fun so i might do it anyways)

anyways thanks for reading goodbye

[cconfusedkat]

(shaking hands, functioning on three iced coffees, not beta read we just die) (LIL BRO TREATING THIS LIKE AO3Anyways yeah i did not read anything i typed here a second time so my wording might Suck Major Kuss)

Hey chat! sorry my holiday depression unfortunately kicked in, i had a ,, relatively decent Eid (cuz i dont celebrate christmas) ...? so i hope everyone had a relatively better holiday than i did… 💦

My friends often tell me i look like my art and i kinda see it. Hooray! Meeting the artist! Except i took matters into my own hands of making my own collage because I Do Not Have Enough Storage Space For Any Other Editing App

Additional shitpost ❤️ the art I've been most proud of are not actually in here, really! I'm mainly proud of the fanart i made for the few smiling critters AU's aaaall the way back feb-march but. I guess the stuff i liked the most i did this year was probably for the one who wilts? Im trying to think of stuff earlier than that. I noticed i definitely had an improvement in art, and i learned i do have a preference of drawing certain ways now too lmao- the fun of art! I hope to improve more in 2025 :-)

Herm,, all jokes aside, im glad people like my art...?? I am not a very Secure artist myself (already taking me five minutes to type that out and consider myself as an artist) so im SHOCKED when people Actually like my things. My doodles. The sometimes rare occasion of real art i put out there. Like! Wow! Thats crazy

Id have to say the same for youtube- im currently at 456 subscribers 🥺❤️ that is huge to me,, i wouldnt have expected me posting for the first time in years on youtube would result to me getting this many subscribers? ? .???

Im very, VERY thankful for the people ive met this year through fandom and generally. Unfortunately—for the past few months—Ive hit a really low stump in my mental health that limits me from talking to people without getting super drained, even on social media i kinda struggle with being active again. I am thankful for the people that continue to stick around and know im the way that i am,, one day ill be mentally stronger and everyone is gonna see my growth as soon as i can ,, Actually leave my own home and hopefully start a new. I didnt really consider that until one of my friends shared its experiences with me and i GENUINELY realized i can run away and get better one day,, there is a light at the end of the tunnel,, there IS,, but not now. Not today. Not in a few months. Itll take me years to heal but 2025 and ongoing years as i get more freedom to do so,,

UHHHH UHHH. ASIDE FROM CHEESY RANTING OF HAVING HOPES FOR THE FUTURE, YAPYAPYAP- i got a drawing tablet (again another thing my friend inspired me for- technically two major things in a row it inspired me for- hope in the future and drawing BWAHAHA-) and uhhh. HmMMOOHHH YEAH I REUNITED MY MEOWMEOWS! HOORA🎊🎊🎊🎊

my 2025 goals are not just improvement in art,, but in hopes of getting a full time job (since my last full time UMM. did NOT work out well! How am i gonna learn to pay my taxes on my own dawg,) and trying to get a place of my own since i missed out on that two years ago (or one? One year ago? I DUNNO..!!!!) , therapy and trying to heal better compared to my terrible stumps of 2022-2024,, i dunno what else but. Maybe working on my social skills at some point 🗿🗿 a far fetched goal is moving out of state completely and also going on testosterone but that is farrrr from now </33

Thank you lot for following and keeping up with my goofiness i gen did not think an animanga nerd with a passion of indie and mascot horror games could reach 510 followers within one year HELPPP thats crazy

On less serious goals though i hope on watching more animes than reading manga in 2025 BWAHAHAGAHSAJD i read manga more and anime is Extremely Rare for me to watch but both jjk and Beastars have all ive been watching as of recent lol- trust i will be such a geek (girl Please that is NAWT something to look forward to) (YES IT IS. HAVE YOU NO WHIMSY?)

[codacontainmentbreach]

​im projecting borderline personality disorder onto johnny ghost and no one’s allowed to stop me

TW: mention of abuse / SH / sucide (nothing in detail) + generally heavy discussion of severe mental illness

so first, having BPD does not make people inherently violent or manipulative, nor is it an excuse for violence or manipulation. People with BPD more often take out our emotional pain on ourselves privately, not on other people. The stigmatization of BPD makes it harder to receive lifesaving treatment and therapy. It takes intense personal work to survive and reach a place of stability and happiness. Recovery/healing and having a good life with BPD is possible, it’s not hopeless if you have this disorder. We deserve to live and we deserve dignified support.

For this headcanon, Ghost/Jimmy Casket are NOT violent or murderers. Also I’m not going to try to tackle any other disorders, this is purely focused on BPD.

Feel free to disagree about him having BPD, or him and Toast being a couple. This ramble may not be for you and that’s fine!

(lastly, im not a mental health expert or a counsellor, please seek professional advice if you’re struggling)

Let’s go down the diagnostic criteria and how it applies to Ghost, keep in mind a lot of this is headcanon, he doesn’t have to meet all 9 criteria, and this is just for fun

1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or perceived abandonment

Ghost can get by on his own just fine for the most part, he can take jobs by himself, but he cannot function when he knows or believes that Toast is missing, leaving him, upset with him, or gone

The whole arc where Ghost was jumping through dimensions trying to get back to Toast, constantly running into “fake” Toasts in other dimensions who don’t know him. i think it’s suggested that this arc was a series of dreams, and a recurring focus is Ghost losing Toast in some way

Specifically about taking dramatic measures to avoid abandonment, we see him frantically arguing with “Toast” in the dreams, threatening other characters and taking desperate actions so he can get back to his dimension and the real Toast, and neglecting his health because their separation is destroying him.

I think Ghost would probably do irrational or drastic things that seem rational to him during an episode, in order to try to save his relationship if he feels like it isn’t stable or to protect himself from the pain of abandonment. This might show up as isolating himself, picking fights with loved ones, testing them to “see if they’ll stay”, etc.

In their normal life, Toast knows Ghost’s triggers very well and does his best to make their relationship feel secure, so Ghost doesn’t spiral as often anymore

2. A pattern of unstable or intense relationships characterized by extremes of idealization and devaluation

(a part of BPD is a defense mechanism called splitting; when we’re unable to hold opposing thoughts about ourselves or someone/something else, our thoughts shift entirely between extremes of adoration/infatuation or hatred/repulsion)

Things are better for Ghost now, he has Toast and the PIE team, he found a loving support network. Like I said, recovery and living a happy life with BPD is possible

I’d say his relationship with Toast is still intense; the trust between them is strong but it needs to be consistently maintained. Toast is an incredibly mature/patient/thoughtful person and is equipped to take care of Ghost the way he really needs in their relationship

Idk if this was canon, but when Toast went back to England for university, I guarantee you that felt like abandonment/betrayal for Ghost at the time. He probably spent years splitting on his feelings about Toast, because he can’t feel hatred/contempt towards Toast for leaving AND miss him/blame himself at the same time, so his brain would keep swinging back and forth between those extremes. When Toast came back, it took a lot of work to rebuild the trust that Ghost lost in him.

By now, Toast recognizes when Ghost is struggling to trust him, and Toast knows how to approach it —usually trying to communicate, apologizing if he actually did something that hurt Ghost or reassuring him that everything is okay between them, and giving him space if necessary. The episode will pass and the trust can be mended, they’re worth it to each other.

Realistically, sometimes Ghost is too much for Toast, and he might need space or extra help when Ghost is in an episode.

His friendships with Spooker and Chris (Colon) are unstable, even though they’re still friends and deep down Ghost likes them. They annoy him and piss him off VERY often, and he lashes out at them when they mess up on the job. Canonically, he sometimes isolates himself and cuts them off because “they’re all idiots,” but eventually they make up and continue working together. By now Spooker and Chris definitely have a good understanding that this is just a part of working with Ghost, and he has gotten better about it. They idolize him and Toast is the one paying them anyway

Also gonna throw in Ghost’s parents here, because remembering his father is extremely triggering for him and I headcanon that he and his mother fought a lot when he was younger

Adding a few more unstable relationships to the pattern: the Toilet Toucher is his uncle Ernie; Ghost has a hate-fuelled rivalry against his uncle

Katrina was one of Ghost’s few childhood friends, now the sight of her spirit puts him on the edge of a mental breakdown (although i have a different headcanon where she and Ghost reunite, she gets hired at PIE, and they’re still bff’s while she’s a spirit)

3. Identity disturbance: markedly/persistently unstable self-image or sense of self

Let’s get into it. Ghost was born as Gregory, a very frightened, shy, and vulnerable kid, and because of the unsafe homes he grew up in + demonic attachment, Gregory mentally could not stay who he was. He had a total loss of identity, and either consciously or subconsciously, his primary sense of self became someone completely different, essentially his brain was overhauling itself to become a dysfunctional mix between Johnny Ghost and Jimmy —a paranormal entity in the same body— in order to survive those years. Ghost doesn’t remember any of this.

It’s extremely difficult to maintain a consistent long-term personality/sense of self with BPD, especially during periods of life that are unstable, dangerous, or traumatic. From my own experience & to my knowledge, this is a more severe form of dissociation with BPD.

Eventually in early adulthood, it was impossible to keep denying that something was wrong, and that Ghost and Jimmy were not functioning. Ghost was still repressing this and his brain was determined to keep him unaware. He just knew he was more extremely depressed and forgetful than usual. It took a mental breakdown lasting several years, which I think Ghost blocked out completely, before his sense of self redeveloped to be more solidly Johnny Ghost —even if that identity may have been present sometimes throughout his life, since Ghost has small pockets of childhood memories, and even though Jimmy still exists in their body as a paranormal attachment

Now that he’s an adult and after a constantly unstable sense of self/safety for his entire life, and a TON of denial and amnesia barriers, Ghost’s identity is way more fragmented than he thinks it is

He doesn’t consciously know about Jimmy or Gregory, and he himself is a confident and strong person, so he doesn’t realize how unreliable his mind is

4. (TW) Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging

How about he quit his ghost hunting job at the drop of a hat, blamed all of his coworkers for being idiots, and was completely sure that he was retiring forever when really it was just a break and he eventually regretted impulsively quitting.

Johnny Ghost is such an adrenaline junkie, possibly Toast too. They chase tornadoes, they go skydiving, they hunt real demonic entities in dilapidated buildings, their whole job is risky and when faced with dangerous individuals, Ghost’s behaviour often makes it even riskier

But in other ways, Ghost is not impulsive. he diligently thinks things through and he doesn’t use drugs/alcohol. This may be a sign of BPD recovery. Honestly, based on the way he turns down alcohol every time he’s offered it, to me that seems like he has a strong conviction about being abstinent; maybe addiction runs in his family.

I think he probably goes on reckless drives, he’s from a rural town in the US, that’s not uncommon, especially in an emotional episode

When he’s not struggling to fall/stay asleep, he puts off sleeping or pulls all-nighters if something else is “more important.” This isn’t as much impulsive as it is self-destructive.

There have been times where, during an episode, Jimmy put himself in danger or triggered himself on purpose, which (imo) can be a way to keep feeling as much emotion as possible when he’s sick of being numb or disconnected. It’s essentially a harmful form of grounding.

If something triggering happens or during stressful periods, Ghost might experience impulsive tendencies for self-sabotage, a need to push everybody away, and the damaging behaviours in #5

5. (TW) Recurrent self-mutilating or suicidal threats or behaviors

In this headcanon, Ghost has struggled with these things, as well as psychosis and possibly euphoric episodes or hypomania where self harm or suicide can be a major impulse. He’s doing better now that he has a support system. This is personal so I’m not gonna say more on that.

6. Affective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few days

Ghost sometimes pushes everyone away or picks fights with loved ones over small or imagined issues. He also picks fights over serious issues. He picks a lot of fights.

He’s extremely quick to anger and stress, plenty of times he’s been triggered into a trauma response, and he shifts from panic to suddenly not remembering where he is or what just happened. Emotion-induced amnesia barriers can occur with BPD.

An important part of BPD is an inability/difficulty regulating emotions. Anger can feel physically painful, happiness can be overwhelming, sadness or depression can be catastrophically devastating. Those extremes are a baseline of how we feel things every day.

BPD often develops from repeated invalidation of a child’s emotions and needs, so a lot of people with BPD have deep-rooted beliefs that their emotions are unacceptable, invalid, or not real. In Quiet BPD, usually these emotions are hidden as much as possible and all anger/pain is internalized to be taken out on ourselves in private, because we’ve been conditioned to never express our emotions in front of people.

We might forget/deny we even have trauma, or believe what we went through wasn’t “bad enough,” so we might adamantly believe we don’t need help or don’t deserve it.

Johnny Ghost has a LOT of difficulty regulating his emotions. And although he definitely doesn’t actively repress them, he still has a conscious and subconscious reflex to block out any ideas of addressing his emotions and underlying trauma from the belief that it’s not real or serious.

It’s where the denial of anything being mentally wrong with him and denial that anything bad has ever happened to him that suggests his emotions and needs were consistently invalidated growing up. He firmly believes he had a good life and that he doesn’t need help, and he adamantly will not ask for help when he needs it.

This is another reason why Toast is so important in his life, because Toast knows him well enough to tell when he’s struggling, to take initiative with Ghost when he needs help, and to convince him that he deserves it.

7. Chronic feelings of emptiness

This one is debatable, because Ghost is in a place where he’s surrounded by people who care about him and he’s working his dream job. He knows who he is, he lives an exciting/fulfilling life, and he has people who affirm that he’s cared for. He may not deal with feelings of emptiness as much now, but he could have in the past

Feelings of emptiness with BPD can be spending minutes, hours, days, months, or years having no idea who you are or what you want in life, and feeling like you genuinely don’t exist/aren’t human/aren’t real. It’s a lot of depersonalization.

I don’t think Ghost meets this. Idk, maybe he does when he’s not busying himself with work

8. Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g., frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights)

Did somebody copy-and-paste this criteria from Ghost’s wiki page

Ghost has random bursts of anger, both intense/uncontrollable and casual/passive, alllll the time. This man has a temper. But it’s usually balanced out by how calming and level-headed Toast is, and how well he knows him.

The Acachalla family hires him often and on some occasions they refuse to pay him or threaten him and he’s triggered into an episode. (instead of killing them, let’s say it starts a fight between them, which is serious considering this would be him fighting with clients while he’s working)

Ghost fights a lot of his clients and most of his coworkers/employees

9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms

Ghost’s memory is terrible. And in extremely stressful situations, he sometimes blacks out and ends up not remembering anything that just happened or where he is. This kind of amnesia barrier is severe

On intense or exasperating jobs, Ghost also tends to get more paranoid, agitated, irrational, and delusional

I think he experiences a high level of dissociation as a baseline, especially when he’s either overworked and sleeping poorly or working too little for his comfort. If he’s not avidly hyperfocused on something throughout the day, he often spaces out, wanders, loses significant chunks of time/memory, and it shows in mid-conversation or on the job. It worries Toast a lot, but this is what Ghost considers normal and he resists talking about it.

Also in those moments when he saw Cardboard Friend, saw the drawing of Timothy Casket, and heard someone calling him Gregory, he may have been having flashbacks that were confusing and disorienting, while still being aware enough to speak (somewhat incoherently) and deny everything so he can keep doing his job

Conclusion lmao

So add onto that some major sensory issues, hypervigilance, workaholism, confabulation (processing false memories), and an ungodly amount of denial running through his veins, and you’ve got Johnny Ghost.

(Btw there’s a lot of crossover between BPD and Autism.)

I know some people dislike him as a character, because in canon he can be a gigantic asshole. My version of Ghost is not quite the same as the source character. In this headcanon, Ghost tries to work towards recovery to be a better partner and friend, and to push through his conditioning/denial, even though he’s not able to be aware of his trauma and it’s been slow/non-linear.

But characters with BPD are going to be flawed, especially those who don’t have the resources we have in real life. They’re not going to be completely likeable and comfortable and in the right all the time, whether they're in recovery or untreated.

The fans who like Ghost as a character like him because he’s so flawed. He’s a menace, he’s a jerk, he’s stubborn, he’s not always trying to heal, he’s dysfunctional, he’s got anger issues, he talks too much, he’s a control freak, he has poor social skills, he’s an amnesiac, he’s an insomniac, he’s childish, he’s irrational, he’s in denial, he’s unstable, he’s egotistical, he’s inconsistent, he's impatient, he’s irritable, he’s dramatic, he’s reckless, he’s delusional, he’s paranoid, he’s worn the exact same clothes for the past 10 years. He’s a gay disaster but he’s our gay disaster.

Ghost is not an easy person to get along with, his recovery has not been easy to maintain, he’s a person who’s suffered. Toast has done a ton of work to heal and better himself before getting into another relationship and be someone who can take care of the people he loves, because Ghost needs SO much care and patience from him. And that’s just who Toast wants to be as a partner. Still, Ghost is able to support Toast when he needs it too. They’re both grown adults and they’ve known each other for decades. Their relationship isn’t perfect, neither of them are. They’re human, but at the end of the day they’re always worth it to each other.

Ghost deserves the love and care he has in their relationship. He needs Toast, and Toast needs him. And the way they balance each other out is very much an “opposites attract” dynamic. Ghost has worked so hard and endured so much to get to where he is now, even though he still has issues and hasn’t exactly recovered. BPD is one of the most painful mental illnesses to have, I’m not sure if it ever fully goes away, but it goes into remission, and many many people who’ve reached stability and happiness fought like hell to get there. This is a very long road and having support from other people is essential.

Their relationship is so narratively strong because they’re both such a mess and they’ve seen each other at their worst and they love each other anyway.

And it’s fine that this ramble is so horrendously long because im never gonna post it. that would be crazy.

[a-sad-mage]

TOXZON MY BELOVED

Toxzon, Dr, Tytus Octavius Xander's was royally screwed over by both N-Tek, THI and basically everyone in his life.

[Click for full rant]

The man literally has a mental illness(im not even going to try and figure out what it is, because there are many possibilities). What he needed was support from both his jobs and the people around him, both past and present.

I mean you would think a military base like N-Tek would invest in a psychologist for its operatives to talk to, and THI, after Molly took over, would have encouraged and payed it's employees to seek therapy after what happened with Naught and Dredd.

Because honestly, if I found out my boss was an evil android, and worked for an even more evil guy that lived in the roof, and all the tech that was made was to be used as a siphon to turn people into a power source for the super villain guy in the roof who is effectively immortal(a rant for another day) I would need so much counseling, because WTF I was technically apart of harming so many people!

Also, I blame Molly for Xander's becoming Toxzon.

Like girl, the man was used to not being supervised because of how Naught and Dredd were running the company. Instead of firing the clearly mentally ill man that you yourself acknowledged was talking to a plastic fish, put him on unpayed suspension, have him supervised by someone you trust like an N-Tek scientist. Tell him he needs to seek professional help so he can keep his job.

Not publicly humiliate him by having security drag him out of your office(and the building) as your son and his friends walk in.

And at the very least, if you did have to fire Xander's, have a conversation that lasts more than five minutes about it, even if that means rescheduling with Max and his friends.

Because yeah, he did kinda make a tentacle monster that almost killed and traumatized an intern.

Also, how the hell did Molly not know about the huge lab under the building with toxic waste?

I'm just-

I'm not saying Molly deserved what happened to her when Toxzon infected and mutated her in 'The Secret Admirer', but like it could have been avoided.

On top of that, Fishy is clearly the evil one here. That bow tie, top hat wearing, uneven eyed, plastic fish is straight up the inner most, and quit frankly most toxic thoughts and traits of Xander's personified.

In 'Gone Fishin' Toxzon pollutes the whole damn ocean just to get Fishy back, and the moment he does, and sucked up all the contamination, it's Fishy that's like 'use that goop to kill some mofos', the thought did not cross his mind till Fishy was back with him.

I am willing to bet Fishy is the reason why he keeps making such destructive choices.

Now I'm not going to sit here and make a diagnosis, I'm not a doctor, but from everything I understand, my beloved mad scientist/eco-terrorist needs counseling, and needed it from a young age, but never got it.

According to the MaxSteel(2013) section of the FandomWiki, he is canonically 33 years old, and if we're assuming the show takes place is 2012 as according to the date of issue on Max’s drivers licens, Toxzon was born in around the 1980's. And back then, mental health wasn't taken seriously. And because Xander's was a bright kid, since you know the guys a freaking genius, it was most likely overlooked as a 'smart kid' thing. See Seldon from BBT & YS.

He was failed, by pretty much everyone in his life.

And much like the Decepticons from Transformers, Dr. Tytus Octavius Xander's became the villain people saw him as and not the misunderstood man that just needed professional help and a friend.

And I will forever defend him.

Jason Naught, Miles Dredd, and Troy Winter's can all kick rocks because they are genuinely bad people who take pleasure is hurting others and taking advantage of people.

Two of these three actually sided with an alien race that was going to consume the earth killing every living being on it and the other committed identity theft, and that's not a joke.

{@treeships, because you so kindly listened}

[lemmetreatya]

asking the jaegers to babysit

im loving val’s @mollyville mini series with eren, baby emiko and black fem reader and just had to write something !!

Eren

“you’re looking after your child today”

its not like he doesn’t look after the baby often but because hes most of the time being supervised by you he can feel uncertain doing it by himself? although he’s usually really good with it so you dont have to worry too much. baby loves their daddy lots and just sees it as fun time sjsksk but even if you do leave them with eren, he’ll always be calling and texting to see if hes doing shit right djdjd

Carla

“carla, please come and look after your grandchild!”

Mother Incarnate.

carla is mostly your first port-of-call for baby sitting! she had a real gift for kids and genuinely loves to look after them. she feels its her duty as a grandparent, honoured that she’s bestowed the chance to do so!

she was also one of your main helpers when the baby first came, giving you tips and health tricks to cope with post-partum depression and body changes so you trust her with your babe as much as yourself.

she also understands how sometimes you just want a break from looking after babies all day so she’s always willing to take the bundle off your hands.

Grisha

“hey grisha! sorry to disturb but is it possible if you’re able to look after the baby tonight?”

“carla isn’t available?”

on the odd occasion carla’s unavailable, you ask grisha. whenever you ask him to look after his grandchild, he’s at first shocked because ‘why on earth would you ask him of all people?’ but then he’s also worried because he doesn’t think he’d do a good job. sometimes you remind him like, grisha — you do know you’re a father of two, right? and he’d be like ‘yeah, and look how they turned out’

really, he’s honoured at the fact that you’ve asked him because again, if hes the next best option from carla then that’s a compliment, but he does try and advise against it. he’s also usually very busy so these asks happen only on odd occasions.

Zeke

“zeke, me and eren have a function tonight but we have no one to look after—”

“ill do it.”

its funny because this man would take up absolutely any chance to babysit but simultaneously disturbing since you’re weary of what exactly he’s teaching your child. he’d honestly be more of a last resort typa situation but because he loves spending time with his niece/nephew, you at least know you have an option.

it doesnt even matter if hes busy, just give him a chest baby carrier and he’s on it. hes a sucker for running errands with your little beau on his chest (he may or may not use your child as a way to get sympathy/numbers from woman ddjskdoem)

Mikasa

“hey mimi! i know you’re super busy but i just have one tinsy tiny favour to ask — and it’s desperate!”

mikasa is as much family as the others but shes always super busy with her lil etsy/amazon business that hit big! even more busy than grisha lol but she’s always so willing regardless? like even though most the time shes flying across the world and hosting events, when things get exceptionally desperate, you resort to asking her, even if it may be a bit of a lost cause.

[pinazee]

Talk Derby to Me

Alright, another Juliet ep, and it’s… fine. It has some good moments. Im trying really hard not to be nitpicky but its only because it had so much potential to be one of their best eps, but instead, it falls a little…flat. BUT this is a great opportunity to finally talk about juliet! So ill do it in two parts: the first, discussing juliet in the ep, and the second, who she is in the show.

So, to be completely honest, part of the reason this episode is kind of meh for me, is that the acting from our supporting players and even a bit from maggie, kind of takes me out of it. The one time i believed juliet was a badass though, was when she was protected shawn, but at that point shes not trying to be a roller derby girl. Shes just being her badass cop self. I think her undercover work gets better as the show progresses so this isn’t necessarily a criticism, but more of an acknowledgment of where she started at.

Juliet is adorable in this ep, though. Plus i like that her and shawn both got to give the chief the wrap-up in the end.

I wish juliet would have gotten an aha! moment and more participation in the solve. Like, sure, have shawn put it together in the end, he is our main character, but i think she could have gotten part of it at least, in her own way. For instance, she could have seen the green lubricant too and put it together that it was wilde, then gave that clue to shawn. Yes, she did find the scanners, but then immediately asks shawn about them instead of taking a second to work it out herself. I think this would’ve helped make them feel like more of a team, since it was mentioned explicitly by the chief. I think this is why it feels too much like a girl power ep and not a roller derby ep for me. That could also be a product of the format though, since the shows focus is shawn (and gus) after all. Plus, again, i think they get better at this (theres a moment coming up this season that ill mention specifically)

I think they could have developed the tension a bit more between juliet and shawn too, since her being “bossy” was part of the drama of the ep. Though, i dont understand why shawn didn’t tell her from the beginning it was a music video and was instead telling her to trust him blindly. I think instead, they should have gone one of two ways with this:

1. shawn tells her its a music video, but juliet cant, as a cop, ignore a lead simply because he “divined” it, then when she gets in trouble we could see shawn feeling guilty that he couldn’t prove it to her without casting doubt on his ability and thats why he takes the blame.

2. they could’ve had shawn try more tactics at distracting her with romance, and have her tell him essentially that now was not the time and ask for more support from him in solving the case instead of trying to woo her. Which again, would provide a reason for him to take the fall for the music video debacle.

Also its chivalrous, i guess, for shawn to take the blame but it kind of goes against juliets character not to be honest. I wish they wouldve let her come clean. That being said, it was funny to watch juliet in the background staring at shawns feet and then snickering at lassies expense.

Now, overall, i love juliet as a character! I love that they didn’t try to make her this like super badass and unrealistic woman. Juliet is flawed, and fun, and naive, and tough, and competitive, and feminine, and proud, and sweet. Actually, my favorite thing about her is just how sweet she is because of how that contrasts with her job. She is a full person and not just a love interest or plot foil to shawn. She would still be an important character to the show even if shawn wasn’t in love with her. Plus, how they portray juliet gets better and better as the seasons progress- or at least thats my memory of it, so im curious if thats still the case years later.

Obviously im going to talk about this moment:

I hated it.

Just kidding. It’s cute ☺️ but imo, not entirely earned in the episode, though certainly more earned than their almost kiss in bounty hunters. Personally, i would have preferred this moment to be more of a friends vibe, and have them like laughing together over him falling on his ass or something- but im a sucker for the friends to lovers trope so thats my own bias haha

I randomly heard one of the background ladies roller derby name was Miss-anthropy and its arguably the best one there and its not even a main character.

Lastly, the fact that shawn could take Gus’s test for him and pass, is honestly incredibly impressive and its so funny to me that its played for laughs. Like gus didn’t go how the hell did you pass that test without studying? But is straight up pissed because he had him fret over it all week for no reason. This goes to show though (because i doubt he opened a book) that Shawns been paying attention to gus’ little explanations and studies :)

Heres a random thought, do you think Gus was ever jealous that Shawn could remember stuff so easily? Like, as they were growing up, and gus is fretting over his studies for hours, only to find that his best friend didn’t have to study at all and simply remembered everything the teacher said but didn’t care enough to try- like personally i would be pissed lol. Gus is smart in his own right, but its not without hard work.

P.S

This moment is always a highlight for some reason haha idk why exactly, its barely a joke

[vai3r13]

Hello hello! :) I’m here for our matchup trade for Black Butler! (I sent the pictures for the Paparazzi end :) )

Starting off I am a neurodivergent, queer (but attracted to masculinity) female. I go by she/they and im an INFP Sagittarius.

Physically, I am a 5’2” but wear platform converse or boots every day of my life. Style wise, im definitely alternative. However, Im also a fan of the baggy jeans, tight top, kinda side of grunge. Im also a sucker for black with pastels, so I suppose my color pallete would fall under “Pastel Goth” or something similar. I actually really love the style called “Morute” which stands for “Morbidly Cute”. I just absolutely adore the creepy-cute combination, and i aspire to look like a creepy doll somedays.

That also would lead into hobbies, as I love dolls! I collect them and will gush over them any time i see one in public i like. Especially going to cons and seeing the little stands with BJD dolls? I go feral-...and broke. My entire room is decorated in pretty dolls, anime figures, manga, and cherry blossom vines. (I really want a cherry blossom tattoo on my back but im terrified of needles-) My other hobbies include writing, skateboarding, singing/making music, and dancing! I have a band with friends right now. I’m training my voice to be a metal singer despite having a feminine voice, so im a bit shy with it right now.

Personality wise, I suppose it tends to fluctuate, but i think what sticks the most is that I'm extremely sweet and loyal. I used to be very shy, and can even be pretty quiet nowadays too. Im definitely introverted but, ive gotten much better with it. Friends would definitely say that im bubbly, always trying to laugh. Definitely witty too because I absolutely love bantering and softly bullying people. Id say im very emotionally intelligent when it comes to other people. Im definitely a realist, and im told im very good with advice and empathizing with people. I feel i understand other emotions more than mine sometimes. Which annoys me- Because I have a habit of not expressing anything negative. I think it might be due to past trauma, but I have a hard time staying angry or upset with people. Its like- once you screw me over, i have no issues getting rid of you. I dont like that i can easily disconnect from people, as I feel it makes me sound like a bad person, but I just feel l like if i know my worth, and someone isnt treating me as they should, I shouldnt keep them in my life. That does go to say though, that I am an all or nothing person with people I care about. If i am your friend, I trust you can come to me with anything and I vice versa no matter what. I always come through and i expect the same. 

Another bad habit though would be disappearing. I wouldnt call it ghosting because I always pop back up, but I usually dont respond or see people for weeks or even months, even close friends. Most that are close know that if they need to talk to me, they have to double text or call me. Ill always answer then. I dont mean to, I just for some reason am really consistent with randomly dropping off the face of the earth for everyone but my partner, or person closest. Texts are always paragraphs though! Im not a dry texter, just forget I exist and have to respond :) Not to mention, i have ran away out of state before just for the sake of going and exploring. (Did a lot of Urbex and trespassing- it was fun but i dont think ill ever go to abandon buildings like that again. That doesnt mean ill stop climbing trains though!) I just love road trips and little late night adventures. 

Some notes about me… Id say my fears involve needles, the dark (I sleep with a nightlight but love horror-), Clowns, and deep water. I cannot swim and have nearly drowned before so I actually hate going swimming. I dont see the appeal and start to panic if i cant see or touch the bottom. I wouldnt say im scared of spiders though like most. I actually am the person my job calls for to grab spiders and take them outside. If theyre cute, ill just grab them with my hand. Another thing is that I have OCD and PTSD. My OCD isnt the typical stereotype of being clean, Im just very routine with patterns. The person im with has to be okay with frequent alarms I set for different time frames, my strange eating habits (I cant have anything touching, one food at a time, soft foods over crunchy, and i absolutely love bananas but cant eat them unless someone peels them for me while im not looking) I also get very paranoid about certain things, like for example, i get little episodes sometimes where I freak out because I believe Ill inherent my dads schizophrenia and Ill because dissociated with reality, so whoever im with needs to be able to help assure me i wont just lose my mind- That being said, my least favorite love language is touch! I can be touched, but its very easy to overwhelm my due to past trauma. I also flinch very easily without even thinking and it gets annoying when people make fun of it. Because of this as well, im a very silent walker and tend to scare people because i subconsciously make myself as unnoticeable as possible. Im also an insomniac. I will not go to bed until the sun is up, and even then I wake up very easily. My doctor keeps trying to give me medications for it so i can sleep better, but its so ironic because I stop taking them constantly because I hate feeling tired. SO someone who doesnt mind being up a bit late would be appreciated :) 

Random facts are: I absolutely adore raccoons and rats, and used to be a rat mom! I’ll spit out little rodent facts like im google. I know morse code. Im an amazing driver. I will get you there fast and safe….fast as in i max out my car frequently and if i get one more traffic misconduct i lose my license. BUT i know how to be safe with taking those risks, if that makes sense? Like i know where and when to speed and when not to- Most people fear getting in the car with me. But other than that, i think that’s it for now! Thank you <3

Hello!<3 @xxchthonicreaturexx

I apologize for any mistakes! English is not my native language and I'm new to writing:) Written in "you" perspective

possible tw - talk of mental health, mentions of unhealthy relationship ig? idk how healthy grim reapers r, mentions of drowning and suicide

barely proofread

To start, you're gorg and going off of everything I think your Black Butler match would be..

Undertaker !!

Both visually and personality wise I think you would compliment each-other! In my opinion your energies have something similar.

visual

I think Undertaker would like your piercings, he has an industrial himself.

small head cannons

You both have black nail polish, so painting each others nails as a cute activity:)

Doing each others eyeliner/make up.

classic

Undertakers mbti type most likely is ISTJ while yours is INFP. While your compatibility can seem difficult at first, by appreciating each others differences you "balance" each other out.

Sagittarius and Aquarius are an energetic match, being air and fire signs your elements fit seamlessly. In astrology, air feeds fire.

"i can easily disconnect from people"

Is a trait both of your star signs posses, a similarity that needs to be balanced between the two of you.

In terms of style I can see you in lots of similar/ partner outfits, as your style is somewhat similar too. Undertaker would, just like you, adore pastel goth and a creepy cute, dolly like aesthetic, - not on him but most definitely on his partner.

I think Undertaker would definitely share your love for dolls, acquiring many dolls and gifting them to you.

As we can see in the Luxury Liner arc, I'd say he has his own love for "dolls", if you know what I'm saying.

As for your other hobbies I think Undertaker wouldn't exactly share your interest in them, but he'd definitely support you. Ex. Watching your band perform, making tea to soothe your voice after you've practiced. He'd definitely be one to annoy and tease you in a joking manner, while you're writing or doing other things.

You being more calm/quiet and Undertakers more energetic and chaotic certainly harmonize. You'd participate in a lot of witty banter and Undertakers life mission would be to make you laugh all the time. He'd adore your sweetness and bubbly-ness (is that even a word??) and your loyalty would be VERY important to him. While he acts and is mostly carefree, I think deep down he still wary of deep connections with people, as he doesn't really have friends.

When he achieves said connection tho he might not always act like it but he'd be sort of possessive. Wouldn't let you get very close to Sebastian or Ciel out of a fear, that they would use you against him in some way. It takes a while for him to tell you what he is, it takes him a while to trust someone 100% wouldn't talk about how it happened tho.

I think arguments wouldn't happen very often, when they do tho they would happen out of Undertakers disregard for "human customs", ex. relationships with other people, etc. Undertaker doesn't resort to screaming, he wouldn't even comprehend that you're mad or annoyed with him. After a few days of not talking much he'd try and talk, bring you something, dolls, sweets, whatever. Makes you sit down and explain what's bothering you, wouldn't always get it but he'd try. Makes up by gifting you dolls or figurines.

Would get worried the first few times you disappear, always manages to find you tho. Absolutely goes exploring with you, might not say it but part of the reason why, is because he's worried about you.

Teases you about your fear of the dark, always lights a candle for you at night tho. Undertaker has died through drowning, as shown in a manga panel, so he shares your fear of water. It serves as a constant reminder for him, so you both don't see the appeal.

Might sound weird but he's fascinated with your OCD habits, he asks you about them. Once you explained them, he always makes sure that your food is arranged the way you like it and peels your bananas for you. Doesn't mind the alarms you set, can be your personal alarm clock actually.

Undertaker has dealt with a lot throughout his long life, he has his own problems. He will always assure you that you're going to be okay. Another thing, that might seem insensitive but sometimes he'd joke that you'll be "crazy" together.

Undertaker's very touchy by nature, I would say. After noticing you flinch, he'd be unsure if his presence and being a grim reaper still intimidates you in some way, if he decides talking to you about it, Undertaker will resort to gift giving and quality time.

Being a quiet walker doesn't matter with Undertaker, as he senses your presence, he isn't human after all, or easy to startle.

Grim Reapers require both sleep and sustenance, but have you seen Undertaker? That man runs on two hours of sleep maximum, he also definitely wouldn't mind staying up late. Dancing late at night, while nobody is watching, is definitely a reoccurring activity in a relationship with the Undertaker. He can be a bit overbearing at times.

Depending what century you're imagining this in, Undertaker loves when you drive, it's sort of an adrenaline rush for him.

head canons

-

Doing each others makeup, sitting on a coffin or your bed. "You have to be still, for me not to smudge the eyeliner!!", while he tries to tickle or smooch you.

_

Painting each others nails and making a cute date night out of it, lots of candles around you for the atmosphere. Playful banter, which ends in you two cuddling in a coffin.

-

Going out to explore the woods, him following closely behind you, suddenly disappearing just to appear in front of you, scaring you in the process, making Undertaker burst out laughing. Holding out a hand to help you climb onto things.

-

Exploring the city at night, when the people are sleeping and the bustling and usually loud streets of London are completely empty. Even jumping roof to roof. (This reminded me of that one Howl's moving castle scene. 01:47-02:10 in the linked video)

-

Late at night, while both of you aren't sleeping, Undertakers shop is dark, except for the dozens of candles littered across the room, as a music box starts playing a soft melody. Undertaker coming up behind you and offering you a hand, as you start dancing across his shop, moving through the space together, occasionally stepping on each others feet and giggling.

Again, it's my first time writing and English isn't my first language. I hope you could still enjoy this<3

[pricetagofficial]

get to know your moots

Thanks for the tag, @restwellsoon! divider by @/cafekitsune

what's the origin of your blog title?

In highschool I would often think what my handle on things would be if I ever got famous, and I adored One Direction. Niall's handle on twitter was niallofficial, so I did that but with a play on my name instead and used official.

OTP(s) + shipname

Ummm honestly, Percabeth.

favorite color

Orange (shocker its not like my blog is a giant hazard cone)

favorite game

Kingdom Hearts, hands down. But I also have a stong love for the Final Fantasy games, the Arkham games, and lego games.

song stuck in your head

APT by Rose and Bruno Mars, and Pink Pony Club by Chappel Roan.

weirdest habit/trait?

I have double jointed thumbs so I will frequently pop them in and out of place as a tick.

hobbies:

Writing, drawing, reading, crocheting

if you work, what's your profession?

Currently a student

if you could have any job you wish what would it be?

Paleontologist

something you're good at:

Making people laugh, I also have really good people skills, especially with kids. I also always try to be understanding and see the good in people, even when they may not deserve it.

something you're bad at:

Being patient, driving (im scared shitless), schedules

something you love:

Laughing until I cant breathe with my brother and sisters

something you could talk about for hours off the cuff:

Name any hyper fixation of mine, Jurassic Park, Marvel, DC, Kingdom Hearts, Final Fantasy, Disney

something you hate:

Chronic illness. I have celiacs disease, so I can't eat anything with gluten in it. If my body didn't react as violently as it does, I'd say fuck this diet and eat whatever. But it's like the exorcist, my body wants it out so bad sooooo hard pass.

something you collect:

Uhhhhh, everything. I have buttons, lanyards, pops, dolls, books, small animal trinkets, rubber ducks, mugs, legos, random assortment of nerdy jewelry, figures, the lost goes on.

something you forget:

To eat.

what's your love language?

I honestly dont feel like I fit into just one of these. I've got no idea.

favorite movie/show:

Finding Nemo/Agent Carter

favorite food:

Beef Stroganoff

favorite animal:

peacocks?

what were you like as a child?

Not much different than I am now, just a little more trusting but still stubborn and feisty as hell.

favorite subject at school?

History or music,

least favorite subject?

Math, doesnt matter if I was good at it.

what's your best character trait?

I've been told that I'm a trusting person, and that people feel safe around me.

what's your worst character trait?

I'm too nice at times.

if you could change any detail of your day right now what would it be?

School would be done, and my ideas would be written out in a nice organized way.

if you could travel in time who would you like to meet?

J.R.R. Tolkein. I just wanna pick the man's brain, see how he did it.

recommend one of your favorite fanfics (spread the love!):

Touch Starved by Envysparkler

This is one that I go back to to read all the time. I highly recommend anything by Envysparkler, if you enjoy batfamily gen fics. This one is just so good, and special to me because Dick is a character I hold close to my heart.

&

I wanna be your endgame by @yuujispinkhair

This is a hockey player! sukuna x reader fic, and this series made me want to find a hot hockey player and make them fall in love with me. Winter is amazing, and I lover her and her writing so much.

i tag @yuujispinkhair @strawberrystepmom @history-be-written @loafingdragon (no pressure obviously)

[pixiestickie]

also jamiazu prompt fr u to talk abt: who do u think kissed the other first. how do u think their first kiss played out

RUBS MY EVIL HANDS LIKE AN EVIL MOSQUITO ON A SUMMER MORNING

okay so ill get to the point my awnser is jamil im sorry . i dont know how many people here will agree with this post but i am no longer a coward on tumblr (LIAR)

i mostly feel like this because I can’t picture azul as being straight forward about that sort of thing. i can picture him as meticolously planning and practicing everything beforehand and then just failing miserably because jamil is jamil.

sometimes i think abt how azul never had a friend to socualize with in his childhood (other than the tweels which are FAR from normal friends). if he ever crushed on someone as a kid he 100% never acted out on it because of how insecure he was (and is) with all that bullying he received

also azul is at disadvantage because jamil is always so grumpy around him how is one supposed to know if its ok to kiss this guy without getting punched in the face

the whole thing about jamiazu is that jamil needs to learn how to trust azul (abd actually azul does as well but thats another can of worms that needs its seperate post) which is why i can only see it happen post-book6 jamil

once he learns to overcome his horrifying trust issues induced by his horrible job . thats when he kisses azul ^_^

i really went off topic with this post cuz it was supposed to be about a first kiss but i deserve to wtite paragraphs and be shameless i think

anyway my vision is: they’re hanging out alone in an unplanned place like maybe away from a scarabia party? maybe in the fucking hallways bathrooms away from classes? just not a planned date or anything because i have delusions (i feel like jamil would do it in an unplanned context on purpose). at first they’re just standing there alone with lots of tension, with azul trying to chat like he always does but jamil is deep in thought about how he feels about everything. jamil concludes that he is so tired of depriving himself of what he wants and of holding himself back. that he should go for that kiss because he deserves it ^_^ and azul explodes and dies……. u think about the rest…….

i hope you like my vision i should not be allowed to write crimge when sleep deprived ❤️❤️❤️

[jils-things]

after doing a round 2 of the game, with my sister with me last night - i have a more stable opinion on curly and this is what i think personally

curly can be easily defined as the leader and/or captain of the ship - captains are recruited based on their capabilities to steer everyone and themselves towards progress, or the right path... or the good way. the issue with curly is that he's a bit too generous and kind for a leader because he seems to be the type to give everyone a second chance, which is not necessarily a bad thing but you really have to pick the right people who should be given that chance. and the kind of chance that jimmy was given was way too... liberating for jimmy if you will.

curly is the type to suck up harsh words he receives just to let them have their chance, even if they're in the wrong - this is evident in the birthday sequence where jimmy is quick to criticize curly's "attempt" to be left in a more advantageous spot in his job - which of course is completely wrong and it's just jimmy trying to bash him to project his envy towards him. in fact, curly is even telling this ahead of the supposed time he would announce this (this was supposed to be announced once they're closer to their destination, which isn't ready yet) and i believe he said it because he is worried for his crew, he is very compassionate and he cares for how everyone is doing. it's not for himself. this is just one of his displays of his kind nature to others.

jimmy's friendship with curly is honestly a little... forced to me. i like to think that jimmy is some sort of criminal back in earth who was given a chance to "fix himself" by helping out in the tulpar, and he just so happens to be curly's friend. curly was probably happy that jimmy was "doing better as a freighter" and he wanted what's best for him. jimmy's anger towards curly was probably sustained by curly a lot of times because he believes jimmy is still in the road to "becoming a better man" and there's going to be some bumps here and there

which i now segue into the sequence where anya tells curly about what jimmy has done to her. i think popular belief (and myself included) thought that curly didnt think much of anya's struggle and just enabled jimmy's behavior like that. but after a conversation with my friend, she mentioned that he wasn't prepared for that outcome and he didn't know how to deal with it in that moment. put yourself in his shoes - how would you feel if your friend who was trusted to be in the process of "doing better", gets reported of misconduct? i wouldn't know what to do, and saying "ill talk to them" was just the least he could say in the moment, and he also wanted to believe that jimmy could be still redeemed so he was really conflicted. again, curly is a really kind person, but it's a bit too much that its going to do more worse than good

im sure deep down he definitely planned to do something better to help her - just not now. it's not worth starting conflict in a confined place, because you're stuck with the same people for a year... though his chance to "help anya" wouldn't happen because jimmy attempted to crashed the ship and thus caused curly to be disabled. and with his now, lost voice and mobility, he is unable to do anything to help anya and is now ironically, being taken care of by anya. so now because of his do-good habits, he now realizes he's carrying the burden of being too good to jimmy when he should've been more harsher to him and betrayed the one who trusted him (anya). and she's now caring for him. it's very ironic, and I'd understand anya if she felt upset for this. but even still, anya believed curly ("our worst moments doesnt have to make us monsters") and watched over him until she couldn't take it anymore with more events unravelling.

another example of curly's "i should've said something but I didn't" moment was when he should've complained to headquarters for including daisuke last minute to the tulpar. but he didn't complain

in other words, curly is a person who always aims to do good, but his methods (especially in this situation) wasn't handled as well as he hoped or decided it would be, and he rarely raises his voice to display strictness or concern which thus causes more chaos and struggles in the tulpar. he's very passive at times and if only he had spoken out ahead, things would've been handled much better. maybe not literally better, but at least he wouldn't have to be severely burned and left to lay on the medical bed forever and possibly even helped deliver justice for anya

i believe curly was sincerely sorry for not taking action sooner on her struggles, and that he was incredibly regrettable for being far too lenient on jimmy's behavior

[tuliplips]

first day after breaking up with him i cried unstoppably. anything and everything made me cry and sob. then something shifted in me and i had a really nice week focusing on myself. i felt pretty good, confident even. i felt strong, like i did myself a favour, proud. and i also felt hopeful somehow. hopeful for better things to come. hopeful in knowing i deserve so much love and i am amazing. this feeling lasted a week and it felt so good, empowering.

then he called me and said he wanted to meet up. i said yes. next day we were supposed to meet, he bails on me half an hour before meeting because he had to do shit for his family. he said i’ll see you tomorrow. tomorrow comes around, bails on me again, at the time we were supposed to be meeting. very short messages. barely talking to me. giving me nothing. when i said he doesn’t respect me he said no it’s not true. i said you can call me later. he said sure. it’s been a week and i haven’t heard a single thing.

since then i’ve been feeling devastated. the confident and empowered and trusting feeling i was having (or faking) has left me. constantly having him pop in my brain with everything i do. i can see him in my minds eye. i see him in everyone on the street too. i check my phone a million times per hour. it’s honestly insane. and i’m not even really sure if i even like him anymore. or if i want to be with him or not. or if i really did. i don’t know. there are things i didn’t like. but i also felt like so full of love for him, wanting him to thrive and be his best most vibrant self.

i’m not sure about anything anymore but it’s like i can’t seem to let it go. it’s like being a fucking junkie desperately looking for a fix. i realise now also that it’s extra hard to let go because i don’t have much going on my life right now. i want to have fun and see other people, go out with friends, have a job, have joy, but im battling chronic illness and trying to manage symptoms daily. i struggle to take care of myself like making food and washing dishes. i live in a daze of brain fog and fatigue. he was like the first happy thing i had in a really long time. he was my first sliver of hope, of joy, of lightness in a really dark couple years. it makes sense that it’s hard to let go of that. he made me feel like things are possible again. like life may be worth living again. i felt like he suffers but me too and we can be a strong team. and his eyes! oh god his eyes. the way he would stare at me for minutes and minutes. it’s hard to let go of his eyes. and the feeling of safety when laying on his chest.

i know i’m going to be okay though. but i need to get through this now. and also try to not have shame about these feelings. let them be here. they’re okay to have and to feel.