#tros positivity

[hardware-sparks]

Some silly doodles + a cropping of one because I think it's actually good.

[dameronswife]

literally everyone is so mean to poe in t.ros and for no reason. the fandom likes to claim he's mean in it too but honestly he's only giving as good as he's getting. everyone treats him like their own personal punching bag and I hate it sm...I hope off screen he got a lot of hugs and reassurance from Leia before they left

[namism]

lost | seishiro nagi

➳ categories: canonverse, breaking up, angst, communication problems, gender neutral reader

➳ word count: 1.7k

➳ summary: Nagi breaks up with you nonchalantly and you're wondering where it all went wrong.

➳ notes: this may or may not have been based on experience and i may or may not have gone through war flashbacks while writing this but it's a-okay!

➳ cross-posted on ao3

You got up from bed 28 hours ago. Nagi broke up with you 5 hours afterward.

Now that the clock strikes 1 in the afternoon, you can't tell whether or not the substance you're drinking out of your personalized coffee mug—which, by the way, was given to you by Nagi on your sixth monthsary—is water, coffee, or Red Bull. You have been officially up for 28 hours with nothing but this mystery substance to fuel your brain, but even not-water, not-coffee, or not-Red Bull can take your mind off the sinking anxiety that floods your system.

Thus comes the sudden urge to walk to the nearest convenience store and buy the first alcoholic drink your eyes land on. Although best boy Yoichi Isagi is already on speaker as he talks you out of doing so, in fear that your insomniac body will crash in the middle of the street with no guidance or a merciful civilian around to rush you to the hospital. He speaks in a hurried tone, almost panting, like he's on his way to your flat so that he can stop you before you ride the elevator four floors down to the building lobby, where the exit doors await your presence—but the sad truth is, he's in München, Germany, for work-related reasons, so all he can do to lend a hand is to stop whatever he's doing and focus on talking you out of doing silly things.

"I just need to sleep, Isagi," you tell him weakly, clutching your wool blanket closer to your chest as you lay on your couch in a fetal position. From the looks of your ongoing FaceTime call, Isagi is in his apartment, well-groomed and dressed in simple house clothes, and fresh out of the shower after a morning gym session. He has an AirPod in his left ear, while the other is probably somewhere in his apartment, wedged between tight spaces or buried under heaps of laundry. You wiggle your toes as the air conditioning restarts, feeling the cool air blow on your feet. "A Strong Zero will do it. They also have a new flavor, ha-ha."

"No, it won't. Sit tight and wait until Chigiri comes," he advises sternly. He called your mutual friend Hyoma Chigiri ten minutes ago upon FaceTiming you and learning about the terrible news that he never would have seen coming. Isagi was terrified by the sight of your bloodshot eyes, deepened eye bags, and unruly hair that spread on your couch pillow. When you began to cry, he knew that calling for backup was the best route. "I just… don't understand. Why did you break up?"

"He broke up with me," you correct. He mumbles a passive apology. "I don't understand it either. I mean, I kinda do, but my brain isn't making any sense of it, or maybe it just doesn't want to."

"Nagi is unreadable. I get it."

You groan.

"You see, it's not even that."

You turn on your side and lay flat on your back. You situate the phone on your chest, so that Isagi has a rather unpleasant view of your chin. He mimics your actions by flopping on his bed and lying on his back, inclining his phone perpendicular to his torso.

"Most people can't read him, but I can. I can tell if he's bothered or hungry, if he's annoyed or upset. We were doing okay until yesterday."

"Maybe there's a part of him that you can't read after all," Isagi suggests, then he realizes his indifferent tone. "Crud. Sorry, I didn't mean it like that."

"It's fine," you mumble with a frown. "I might as well get used to reality."

You fear that Isagi might be right. While you were always confident that Nagi was more loose around you (save for his childhood friend Reo), there could have been some part of himself that he kept hidden.

In that case, you wonder why. As far as you can remember, Nagi never had any trouble voicing out his feelings to you.

"What did he even say?" asks Isagi.

"He said some things," you answer.

"I'm going to assume that he didn't elaborate." He sighs, disappointed in the turn of events. "How did it sound to you?"

You think about it deeply. Nagi, a man of a few words, in fact, did not elaborate much on his breakup speech, but from the many years you knew him, you caught on to his reasoning. The way it happened and how it turned into a breakup just didn't make sense.

"Let's break up," he said out of nowhere as you were getting yourself a glass of lemon tea. Your eyebrows furrowed, and you put down the glass on the counter. "Sorry. It's random."

"Are you serious?" you asked quietly. When you turned around, Nagi was already looking at you.

He nodded.

"I think," you begin, "I think he fell out of love."

Isagi stares at the virtual image of you on his screen, jaw slightly ajar as he finds the right words to say. You beat him to it, though.

"He didn't say much, but he could have been embarrassed to admit it because all this time, I've-I've been..."

"You've been loving him for God knows how long," Isagi finishes.

Tears well up in your eyes, and you turn to your side again. Your whole body hurts as you're hit with a new wave of emotions. Falling out of love? It happens to couples all the time, for many reasons. Usually one gets fed up by the other, or one ends up not being good enough for the relationship to move forward in the long run. Your heart sinks.

Suddenly, you're finding certain moments in your relationship with Nagi that can support this thought, and they don't stop coming even when Chigiri is knocking repeatedly on your apartment door.

Isagi is the one who alerts you of your friend's presence, but you're bundled up under the blanket as the shitty feeling resides in you. You need alcohol. Badly.

Chigiri manages to break into your apartment using a key that you have hidden on the upper ledge of your door. When he finds you rotting on the couch, he embraces you in a warm hug and uses a couple of back pats to snap you out of your senses, but they don't work.

Isagi has to go to work, so he hangs up the call after bidding you goodbye and giving an empathetic look that you don't notice. Chigiri sits with you in silence until you're ready to speak.

"Chigiri," you croak.

"Hm?" he hums.

"Did Nagi ever think I was horrible?"

He sighs.

"Of course not."

You snuggle your head into your hands.

"Then why are we in this situation right now?"

"As much as I want to help, you're the only one who can truly answer that," he explains.

"Could it be because I don't play the games he plays?" you mutter. Chigiri is quiet. "Or maybe because I wasn't too big on football when we met?"

He shakes his head.

"That's stupid. Nagi didn't even get into football until high school."

"But when we started out, I learned that we were much more different than I thought we were, so I was always catching up with him and his friends," you admit. "I didn't know how to play his games, so I tried to get into them just so we could spend time together even though I sucked and he looked happier playing with Reo and his girl. I couldn't understand football language until a few months of dating, either. No offense, Chigiri, but I couldn't understand any of your lingo and I would just sit and stand in your celebrations while nodding my head just to fit in!"

"You can't doubt your relationship because you don't game the way he does," Chigiri reasons, "and Nagi never expected you to know football like that."

"But wouldn't those be reasons to get tired of someone?" you ask. "What if... just what if he thought that it would have been nicer if he had someone who had the same interests as him?"

Chigiri sighs.

"Look. You've been awake for more than a day, so your brain isn't braining correctly. How about you get some sleep and we can talk about this again when you wake up?"

"But—"

"No buts!"

Standing up from the couch, Chigiri tugs the wool blanket off your body to force you up on your feet. Once successful, he drags you to your bedroom, where your pillows and comforter are sprawled on the mattress, just the way you left them a day ago. He forces you under the comforter, which you obey pretty quickly.

He fetches your water bottle from the kitchen and cranks up the room temperature. He doesn't leave until he's sure that you're asleep, but your mind stays running long enough for Chigiri to doze off first in your mini sofa bed by the door.

With the background sound of Chigiri's faint snores, you're left with even more time to think about what went wrong with your relationship with Nagi and how you can possibly move on. Every aspect of your life for the past few years that you've been together has had Nagi involved in it in some way. With the presence of the man you're no longer with appearing in every recent memory you have, how is letting go anywhere achievable?

By the looks of it (and your personal gut feeling), perhaps Nagi did get tired. Although the extent of this certainty falls a little below 50% because he didn't explain his reasons as well as you wanted him to.

Using the strength you have left in your drained body, you grab your phone from the nightstand and open your messages. You type a message that comes to mind as soon as you see his contact.

You hey, can we talk? Read 1:43 PM

Nagi reads the message fairly quickly. You're nervous upon realization. A few minutes pass, and the read receipt stays as it is until a small bubble pops up.

Nagi okay can we talk later?

The same nonchalant Nagi that you love is the same person who just replied.

You sure. as long as we get to talk, please

Nagi mhm of course

Whatever is about to happen, will happen. If he can explain as well as you want him to, then you're happy to accept it and move on. If he's sure of losing you, then maybe you should, too.

[nikaizkool]

How they’d cuddle you 😻😻😻😘

Beanie trio + oxey duo

•George

Literally cradle you, wrapping his arms and legs around you like one of those hair claws practically trapping you in his grasp with his head tucked in your neck. If you try to get up he’d mumble into your neck/shoulder “mmmmmnoooooo stayyyyyy” and if you managed to escape he’d kiss your cheek and try to get you to come back to his comfort. “Mmmmmmmmm—love come back” he’d pull you back and cuddle you.

• Sapnap

He’d lay his head in your chest with his torso on your thighs and his hands cuddling your waist. If you tried to pull away he’d squeeze you to him groaning into your chest “nononononono—stay please” he’d low key just trap you by switching the position between you two where your head is in his chest and your torso is on his thighs. Eventually he’d let you go but he’d follow you around everywhere.

• Quackity 😻

His knees bent up between your stomach his head above yours and your head in his chest and your knees cradled up next to his, his arms around the small of your back and your hands closing the gap between you two by holding onto his chest. If you tried to get up he’d just slowly pull away from you looking back up at you “no more? :(“ you’d nod and he’d get up with you, following you around by your hand leading him around like a lost puppy.

• Wilbur

His lanky arms gently laying on top of you while your in fetal position with his head laying gently in the crook of your neck he’d smile into your neck whenever you made the slightest movement. Lowkey would probably lay his head in your thighs and fall asleep while you massage his hair but if you tried to get up from any position he’d groan “mnoooo come back— my love.” He’d put his hands on each side of your face and press a kiss to your forehead letting you leave and do whatever

•Charlie

He’d let you rest your head on his chest while his arm is wrapped around your shoulder with your hand resting on his stomach. If you’d troed to get up he’d lean down to kiss your forehead “why are you leaving? D:” he’d change position to where you were wrapped in both his arms and your head is tucked in his neck. If he let you get up he’d give you one last kiss before falling back to sleep.

[suzannahnatters]

Wellp. The Rings of Power season 2 ep 8 has come. There are many eulogies to deliver in the coming days (and trust me I will) but for now, there is a certain someone who requires a proper sendoff. SPOILERS BELOW

They fulfilled my one true wish: we got to see Fair Form Adar (and my goodness he did not disappoint). And then they exploded my insane crack theory, sunk my ship, and killed him off. Oh well. At the same time, I'm so grateful for what we got. Adar wasn't Celeborn, but they didn't try to make him some other Big Name from the Sil that only 0.04% of the audience would recognise. It was a bit rushed, but the entire episode was sadly rushed and I felt that his sendoff was one of the few moments that did get sufficient screentime. He didn't get the redemption arc I was trying to manifest through sheer willpower, but the way he died fit the story while also extending a moment of grace and hope for the character. This was not Ben Solo in TROS; it was not the Darkling in Shadow and Bone, being gutted as his killer hisses "there is no redemption". And for that, I'll always be grateful. Meanwhile I'm going to spend the next week just staring into the distance, thinking about how the orcs recapture Galadriel and drag her into the presence of their lord, and he's down on his knees giving her his back in a posture of utter vulnerability. I'll be lying on the carpet thinking about how she was the only person he could show his face to. (I may have been wrong on Adarborn but I DID correctly predict that we'd get to see his fair-form). I'll be chewing on broken glass thinking about how when Sauron offered Galadriel a ring and a position healing Middle Earth at his side, she tried to stab him, but when Adar offered Galadriel her ring back and proposed a partnership...she accepted. SHE ACCEPTED. Oh, and? the probability that in all likelihood Sauron saw that happen. (and yep, I also predicted a callback to s1).

*high-pitched fangirl keening*

Anyway, my chums tell me that in the BTS segment for this episode, Adar was originally slated to die much sooner, but Simon Tolkien advocated for the character to be continued. Let's all raise a glass to Simon Tolkien, who is obviously continuing the Lord's work here. And let's admit that even though Galadriel seems to be stuck in the worst possible version of Middle Earth Bachelorette, in which her actual husband is lost and her boyfriends are a hit parade of Middle Earth's Most Wanted (stay tuned for s3, when we all watch in mind-boggled fascination while Galadriel romances Ar-Pharazon!) in hindsight the fact is that this was supposed to be a supporting character who ended up dominating much of the show almost by mistake. I can't imagine how they'll manage to outdo Adar when they bring along Actual Celeborn (unless they cast Dev Patel! I'm sure he's not got anything important scheduled!!!! THE PEOPLE DEMAND A HOT DESI CELEBORN), but if Adar was a mistake, he's a mistake I wish many more shows would make.

In conclusion: yes, I will be writing an Adariel fix fic, filing off the serial numbers, and self-publishing it. It will be titled AUTUMNTHRALL. Stay tuned.

[hyptrance1]

Hypnovember Post 1 - Objectification (Trophy)

Hi all. So I wanted to take a crack at doing some Hypnovember stuff, but I didn’t want to do just some more stories (since I do them all the time on twitter) so I thought I should do something new and maybe a little different. Well, I haven’t done a new induction in…months now? So that is my goal, I will not be doing an induction for every day, cause my fingers would fall off and I would go insane, but I thought I’d choose one topic / prompt a week and post it when the day comes around. You’ll get some new inductions, I’ll be having fun and getting back into some form of hypnosis, and we all win. Now today’s topic is objectification, which what a way to start. So this induction will objectify you into a trophy. If you go under you will pose in whatever pose you think looks best for you (doesn’t just have to be a flex, but I’m imagining some of you on your knees for a “best sub” trophy, or, “most gooned out” trophy) and take a picture of yourself. Dont worry, you’re not sending it to anyone, but I thought you’d like to see yourself in your very own trophy pose. As usual, if you dont wanna go under or dont want to follow the post hypnotic suggestion, then dont read this. I hope you do though, and that you enjoy it, but it is entirely up to you. Without further ado. 

I want you to focus on my words. Allow yourself to get into a comfortable position, allow yourself some grace to be a little bit distracted if it happens, a little bit uncomfortable if it happens. Just allow the thoughts that pass through your head to enter and leave as you see fit, allow your body to shift and get more comfortable as you continue reading. You’ll find that the more you read the easier it is to continue. Might be because you committed yourself to finish this, it might be because you just slowly zone a bit as you continue to look at word after words and all the sudden you’re at the end of this paragraph in no time. Either way, you are continuing to get into the groove of reading this, continuing to let yourself shift into more comfortable positions, let your thoughts pop up and allow yourself to recognize them before allowing them to drift off as you continue to refocus on the next word and the next. 

Usually when I do these types of inductions, I focus on your muscles and your breathing first. This is always to allow your body time to relax and to begin calming you down from anything that may have happened to you during your day. For some of you, it’s not needed. You’re already coming into my induction focused, relaxed, and zoning out. For some of you, it’s desperately needed. And I always think that it’s good to give people some calm and comfort before having their thoughts adrift out of their heads. I usually focus on breathing because it’s proven to decrease stress and tension in your body. Usually, you have to breathe in slowly, and then exhale even slower than you inhale, about double the time. It does something to your muscles, your head, your body to destress it. I’m not sure exactly what it is, but it does the trick, allowing for your muscles to relax, your body to get just a bit heavier in a comfortable way. It also allows me to continue rambling and having you read my words, which is always a good thing when my words are supposed to help you go under. 

Then after all the relaxing of your muscles, the repetition of “inhale slowly” and “gently exhale”, and the description of your muscles releasing their tension one at a time in probably to fine of detail, I then usually go into the topic of the induction, to allow yourself to be primed into the topic of the induction and have your mind understanding the concept before all of your thoughts leave your head. Not exactly sure if it helps, but I do like doing it, brings a smile to my face. But, trophies. We have all seen the poses that are on the mini figures that are on trophies, but I always thought that there could be so many more options for how trophy figures are posed. I’m sure you can think of one, but for me, I can imagine one on all fours, one on its knees, one with its legs up, really it just depends on what you want the trophy to be fore. Can you imagine, in your probably relaxed state, what you’d want to be a trophy for? Are you the best puppy trophy? The best gooner? Maybe just one for a jock or bodybuilder? Maybe it’s a little meta, best object, best drone or robot. Or just simply best hypnotized guy. Whatever it is once you think of a concept, you probably have a pose that comes to mind quite quickly, even if your mind is slowing down for whatever reason. I’m sure thinking of this is getting you hard. 

That’s another thing I usually do in my inductions. Once you’re nice and relaxed from all the slow inhaling and gentle exhaling, once your muscles and body are comfortable, we add the pleasure portion into it. Obviously you probably expected to be hard, and it is the body’s natural response to relaxing, but I always like to highlight that pleasure, that throbbing inflation pulsing in your pants. It just reinforces that going under, that relaxing to my words, that all of this is just very hot. And then I continue to reinforce it by having that pleasure emanate from your pulsing dick out to the rest of your body, cause why let your dick have all the fun when the rest of your body can be thrumming with pleasure as well. 

This actually helps the last thing that I need to do with an induction, actually get rid of your thoughts. The pleasure does a twofold thing of making you feel good, and also helping me push your thoughts out of your head. I usually say something like, “the pleasure is building in your body so much, that it enters your mind and has to push out your thoughts to make room”. It’s a good phrase because it refocuses your head, which most likely has been losing thoughts already, on just the pleasure you’re feeling going under, which makes it that much easier to have you lose the rest of your thoughts until its completely empty. 

Although nothing helps get you quite completely empty like a countdown. I like. A 10 count because it makes it easier to add just a bit more time into taking you under, and that sweet sensation of losing your thoughts and becoming hypnotized. But you know where this is leading to. When I count to 10, you will be hypnotized and completely blank and ready to follow. 

10

Last thoughts leaving

9

Body completely comfortable

8

Muscles feeling good

7

Breathing slow and steady

6

Pleasure flowing through your body

5

Pleasure flowing through your head

4

Blank

3

And empty

2

Like a trophy

1

Completely hypnotized. 

Now, with that you are hypnotized and ready to follow orders. While under in this state, I want you to remember the trophy pose that you imagined for whatever trophy you would want to be on. When you finish reading this paragraph, you will, while still hypnotized, get into the pose you thought of and take a picture of yourself in that position. You will then come back and sit and finish reading this induction. You will not send the photo you take to anyone until you are awake from this induction. Now I’ll see you when you come back. 

Glad to see you back. Now what I want you to do is begin to wake up from this induction. Feel your mind returning to you and when I count back up to 3 you will fully wake up, feeling great, refreshed, and back to normal. Alright:

1

Thoughts returning to you

2

Waking up

And 

3

Wide awake

Wide wide awake. 

Alright, so enjoy the picture of yourself, and if you feel like it, let me know what you decided to be a trophy for and what pose you did. This is more of my normal induction honestly, but I am hoping for the next induction to try something new. Obviously you can let me know how you felt about this and say hi if you want to. Other than that, see you for the next hypnovember post from me. 

[frumfrumfroo]

Imagine making a film series like Star Wars and framing the triumphant romantic kiss as 'goodbye'... I still can't believe they made that film. Obvs that's probably how Daisy Ridley interprets it, not necessarily how it was framed (which was lacking narrative altogether), but it's still miserable. It's not even Romeo & Juliet vaunted romantic tragedy. It just sucks.

I do pity the poor anons who are waiting for some sort of different outcome with a new ST film. Studio executives will never look at the critical failure of TROS (it was a commercial success though) and think the takeaway was 'maybe we shouldn't have fractured the SW myth', it's 'oh, okay, let's never deviate ever again, damn that blasted TLJ' - just look at how JJ and co. tried to retroject TROS' failures onto the previous film. Course correction, course correction. Rey Film, if it gets made, will be DO YOU REMEMBER THIS? self-flagellating apology. Ben Solo will never return.

Yeah, anyone trying to come up with any positive spin on it, including desperate attempts to see it as effective tragedy, are doomed to failure. Only by completely ignoring the context and taking the moment by itself carried only on the actors' performances as continuity from TLJ without any of the terrible fucking tros script in the way can the kiss actually mean something.

As soon as you try to make tros into any kind of story or draw any kind of sincere message from it, you immediately run into the brick wall of what a soulless, nonsensical piece of trash it is.

I had a whole rant about how it's not Romeo and Juliet and I am still so annoyed how often people draw the comparison, both utterly missing the point of R&J and giving tros credit which it does not deserve by imagining it assigns any meaning to Ben's death whatsoever.

Yep. We've seen them do nothing but triple down. They have no idea why the movie was such an embarrassing wet fart. Rey the sexless eternal child will never be challenged again, she'll go on a worship tour of references, places, and objects to do reverence as the Brand Avatar. She's not a character any more and she's never going to be again.

[steamedbuncollective]

DISCONNECTROJECT

A disconnectroject (dis-co-nect-tro-ject) is an introject who feels little to no connection to their source. This could be due to having no source memories, acting incredibly different to their source, the alter willingly disconnecting themself from their source, or any other reason.

This alter may still feel positively, negatively, or neutral about their source while still being heavily disconnected from it.

The gray and muted brown represent detachment from the introjects source.

The white represents the disconnection the alter may feel towards their source.

no credit needed to use this term/flag!!

endos do not use this flag. make ur own flag/term.

[awkward-tension-art]

Darkness on Umbara Chp.7 (Rex x Reader)

Chapter. 6 Chapter 8.

Silk

cw: Rex x Reader, Reader is a medic, incorrect military procedure, graphic descriptions of injuries, blood, swearing, death and battle, Spoilers for the Umbara Arc, Pong Krell is an asshole, reader insert, names of non-canon dead clones, Reader has an emotional breakdown, reader is gender neutral, no use of (Y/N), if i miss a tag LMK

Minors DNI

 While Rex and a few others scouted ahead, You took a desperate shot in the dark.

“General Krell,” you had the comm close to your lips, “We need the medical speeder. There's several wounded that need to get out of here.”

You were met with silence.

“Sergeant Appo, if it's you i'm talking to, get me General Krell before I shove my laser scalpel up your-”

“That will be unneeded, Doctor.” the General’s voice came through on the other end, “The wounded will be extracted when the airbase has been taken.” 

“Sir, some of the wounded can’t wait that long. They need to get to a safer location so I can-.” You were practically begging the Jedi at this point.

“I have the utmost faith that you’ll be able to save them from where you are.” He responded, but even on this end, you could practically hear the uninterested look on his face. You were about to respond but the comm cut. Krell was done with you.

You looked around you, taking in the injured. Three of them needed surgery. Two needed bacta tanks ASAP. Five were entirely unconscious from blood loss and missing limbs.

And one, Fisher, was leaning against a broken and destroyed AT-RT. His chest had been completely eviscerated, exposing broken ribs and damaged organs. You couldn’t do anything, you didn’t have the bacta or supplies to save him. Yet, it would take hours for him to die. 

So you held his hand in yours and gave him as many painkillers as it took to stop his heart. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Jumper. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. 

“Doc?” Nax had remained close, guarding you while Rex and the others went ahead, “Are you ok?” 

“No, Nax.” You admitted, “I’m not.” 

This wasn’t the first time you’ve had to mercy kill. But you hated yourself every time you did it.

He remained silent as he stepped towards you and offered a hand. He was sweet. Very polite. So you took it and stood, “Thank you.” 

The trooper looked like he was about to speak when the ground rumbled. Terror filled your blood. Were there more of those worm tanks!? The air crackled and burned with fire and explosives. They sounded different from the centipede tanks the men shot down earlier…new weapons? You desperately hoped not.

Several soldiers dove over your cover, breathing heavily. Very quickly others joined, remaining hidden. You didn’t want to risk your head to get a look at what was happening. So you knelt, looking at Jesse, who had made it before Rex or the others. He met your confused and worried gaze before answering, “Heavy tanks.”

Rex, followed by Kix and Fives, got to your position. the captain had his comm on, speaking hurriedly, “Sir, we’re overpowered. we need reinforcements!”

“The rest of the battalion is holding the entrance of the gorge, captain.” Krell was on the other end, sounding about as calm and uninterested as when you called, “They're guarding it so your troops can break through to the air base.”

Jesse jerked his head up, sharing a look with Hardcase. Seemed everyone expected such a cold response, but it was still despair-inducing to hear.

A shot exploded directly on the other side of your cover. The heavy tanks were attempting to break through the trees and roots that protected everyone. Another shot hit right above you, raining scorched plant matter down.

You dove towards an unconscious, bleeding trooper and held him close, using your body to protect him from the debris. Once everything passed, you got to work stabilizing him. 

Rex continued to argue with the General, “But sir, we can’t possibly-!”

“You must stand your ground!” Pong fucking Krell shouted from his comm, “Do you read me!? Captain, are you listening? Do not fall back! That's an order!” 

Your lover was unmoving. He was paralyzed in horror that Krell would still push this suicide mission. After a few heartbeats, he shook his head. 

Two voices cried out from the otherside of the cover. You and Kix shared a look before scrambling over to grab them and drag them with the others. Your hands were on one trooper and getting his wounds under control while Kix was dealing with the other.

“Keep the wounded as quiet as possible.” The clone captain nodded to you before addressing everyone else, “Alright, you heard the general. Let's go.”

Jesse whirled around from where he kept an eye on the battlefield, “You can't be serious!”

“I used to think the General was reckless,” Fives spat, “But now I'm beginning to think he just hates clones.”

Dogma stepped forward, clear on which side he stood, “The captain is right. Now let's move out!”

The trooper, Trident, under your hands spasmed. He seized, and you did your best to get him on his side and let the seizure pass, “With who!?” you snapped, cracking under the stress, “Everyone is injured and exhausted or dead!” Trident stilled in your arms, and once you felt his neck, there was no pulse. 

The traumatic brain injury he sustained was too much for him. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Trident.

“Isn’t it your job to patch everyone up!?” He retorted, “With all the dead, you certainly are doing a great job!” 

Your eyes widened and Hardcase shot forward, immediately punching Dogma, sending him to the ground. “Shut the fuck up!” he shouted down at the trooper, “You’d be among the dead without Kix and-!”

“Hardcase! Enough!” Rex stepped between them, keeping his gaze level with the heavy gunner, “Fighting each other isn’t going to help.” Despite his words, he cast a glance at you.

Your eyes met him in his helmet. He was checking on you, in his own way. So you nodded, indicating that Dogma’s words didn’t affect you. You’ve been blamed before. Troopers that were grief stricken would lash out at you, blame you for your failings to save their brothers. Though, later, they’d come to you and apologize. You expected Dogma wouldn’t.

Still, you appreciated how Tup knelt to put a hand on your shoulder. Dogma didn’t look at you as he got up.

“What will help is finding another way to deal with the tanks!” Fives got into Rex’s face, clearly angry. Judging by the way his hands clenched into fists, he was ready to start getting physical too, “We can’t take them head-on.”

The captain remained steadfast, “You got any ideas?”

The ARC trooper looked down and shook his head, keeping silent.

“Then this is it.” Rex looked over at the men who remained standing, and turned to get out into the field. 

Hardcase huffed, adjusting the rocket launcher in his grip, “Ok, let's do it!” He, along with Jesse, Tup and Fives sprinted out. Kix was about to follow before he stopped and looked back. 

“Go. Send anyone hurt to me.” you nodded, remaining with the injured. He gave a salute before rushing to follow his brothers. 

Since the squad of soldiers had run out, all attention from the tank shifted to them. No longer were the trees that protected you threatening to fall or collapse from the shots. You looked over your cover, spotting the second tank that was shooting the trees across the field. Its focus was on the men who were fleeing into the foliage to hide. 

A trooper high in the branches fired a rocket. The explosive didn’t do much other than cause the massive tank to stumble. Once it corrected itself, it blasted the poor clone with its cannon.

You waited for the Umbaran to turn its focus away from that side before moving in. Your feet were quick, diving behind downed AT-RT’s, boulders and whatever other cover you could hide behind. 

Once you made it to him, you realized the trip was worthless. He was dead. Half of his body was gone the moment he was hit with cannon fire. 

But he wasn’t alone. Someone else was down, crying and writhing in pain.

Arm missing. Main problem is blood loss. Still awake. I have time. I can save him.

You got to your knees quickly, skidding on the wet ground as you did so. Your pack was off your shoulders as you began to get as many gauze pads and bandages on him as possible. Your hands were stained with his blood as you controlled the bleeding. 

“Come on,” you draped his good arm over your shoulder and stood, “I’m getting you with the others.”

You watched the tank again, waiting patiently before dashing to another point of cover. Getting back to the injured was slower this time, but you managed to get there. Leaning the trooper against a tree root, you commed Krell again, “General, I need the supplies on that speeder!” 

There was only silence. 

“General Krell!” You were desperate, and your voice was shaking from the fear. Fear for the men. Fear they wouldn’t even get a chance to survive, “General Krell, please!” 

Nothing. Unanswered. 

Your hands were shaking and you let out a frustrated, angry cry. The names of the dead replayed in your head over and over again.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Trident.

No. You still had supplies on you. You weren’t giving up. You refused. 

A trooper stumbled over the cover, carrying an ARF trooper. You recognized Silk and Hinge.

“Doc, he needs help.” The trooper slid the injured carefully down. 

Before you even inspected him, you could tell Hinge was barely hanging on, if he was even alive. His armor was blacked and scorched. Smoke still billowed from his body. When you approached, you felt his neck. 

Nothing.

“I’m sorry, Silk.” you murmured, taking off Hinge’s helmet. Carefully, you closed his eyes before standing. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Jumper. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge.

“...we’re all dead, aren't we?” Silk sat down, leaning against the tree. 

You hesitated to answer. Truthfully, you thought so. You wanted to agree. To accept the truth that Krell won and lead all of you to your deaths.

But…Rex would keep fighting. Your kar’ta wouldn’t go down without taking as many separatists as possible down with him. 

You looked at your hand, testing if you could close it in the brace, luckily, you could. You could feel the movement. Feel your fingers on your palm. Your arm, despite the immense damage, was healing. Your nerves were connecting. Your veins and arteries were directing blood flow again. Your body refused to give up.

You could still fight. Just like Rex would.

“No.” your voice was resolute, “I’m not giving up.” You looked over the injured. More had managed to find your location in various states of bleeding, dying or crying, “I’m not giving up on any of you. Even if I have to pick up your rifles to protect you, I’m not giving up.”

Silk sighed and stood, “Doctor,” he saluted, “I am at your command.” 

You couldn’t help but smile softly, “I’ll need your help. Stay within cover, prioritize your safety, but look for any injured. Bring them to me.”

“I’ll help.” Hem, another ARF trooper stood, rotating his arm to stretch his shoulder, “I’m not too hurt.”

“Thank you both.” you saluted as they climbed out of the safety of the trees and roots. The ground shook with another cannon shot nearby. Thankfully, everyone seemed to be out of view. Or the Umbarans weren’t interested in killing those who couldn’t fight back. 

Still, since those heavy tanks weren’t focused on you, it allowed you to continue your job. These soldiers were your patients. They needed you. They needed your skills. And with whatever supplies you had left, you’d try to save them.

So you got to work. Triage. Deal with the more serious injuries. Prioritize. 

Your training took over. You were on autopilot weaving between the troopers. Your supplies dwindled. You ran out of painkillers and bacta entirely. Your tourniquets were the lifesavers at this point. Using them allowed you to spread your bandages and gauze pads between everyone.

Despite your effects, you still lost a few.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno.

At some point Tup had made his way back to you, followed by Hem, carrying Zeke. Silk wasn’t accounted for, but you trusted he would be alright. 

“Doctor,” Tup got to your side, “How can i-?”

Wordlessly, you handed him bandage scissors. He looked confused, even as you removed the minimal armor plating on your sleeve. As a field doctor, armor wasn’t the priority, medical supplies were. You had some plates on your wrists, thighs and chest, but that was about it. Everything else was covered in protective clothing to allow more medical packs and more freedom of movement. 

Which came in handy, “Cut the sleeve up to my shoulder, and then cut it into long strips.” you commanded Tup. 

“Ok…don’t move. I don't want to accidentally nick you.” The poor clone sounded unsure, shy even, but did as you asked. Despite his shaky hands, he kept the shears steady enough to prevent any small injuries to your skin. Once the cloth was separated, you slipped your arm from the sleeve and returned your focus to the other troopers.

Tup was an efficient assistant. Not even a minute later he had the sleeve cut into lengthy straight strips. You grabbed them silently and used them as extra bandages. 

The ground rumbled and shook. One of the tanks was getting close. Too close. You looked up, taking a chance to peer out into the battlefield.

Three heavy tanks were damn near on top of you as they chased those on the field. Through their shining spotlights, you recognized the silhouette of Rex and Jesse running across the field. Rex had a rocket launcher, and with a broken heart, you realized Hardcase must’ve gone down. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Hardcase…

Hardcase.

“Doc!” You jerked your head up, Silk had returned with another trooper slung over his arm. Once he put the unconscious soldier down, he went back out into the field before you could stop him. 

Kix had found you. He was standing on top of a thick root, back to the tanks, looking over the injured you've collected. Something in him snapped because he shook his head before letting out a cry. Your medic friend began to fire his rifle in the air wildly. 

Tup shot up, “Hey, Kix, put it down! You're wasting aim!” When words didn’t work, he body slammed Kix down to the ground, saving him from the massive foot of a tank.

The Umbaran weapon turned its cannon to where Tup and Kix hit the ground. Before it could annihilate the two, it was hit by a rocket. The explosion caused it to stumble, and its powered up shot hit the branches above your triage area. 

Rex had gotten to your position, standing on a toppled tree that was part of your cover. In his arms was a smoking rocket launcher. Despite the situation, you couldn’t help but think of how handsome he looked. Smoke and ash billowing around him. Back straight, standing tall and determined. You could picture his focused gaze under his helmet now. 

The tank readjusted, stabilizing its huge legs. It focused on the captain and was then joined by the two others. They all charged their shots, ready to destroy Rex completely. You ran towards him, intending to grab his hand and…do something! Save him!

Die with him.

Just as your fingers met his, shots rained down from the dark sky. Two Umbaran starships were shooting wildly. Their guns poured out bright green bolts like water, hitting everything they pointed at. 

You looked up and inside the glowing, round cockpit of the Umbaran ships were Fives and Hardcase! They were laughing, trying to navigate the never-before-seen tech.

They were alive!

“Clear out, captain!”

“The big guns have arrived, sir!”

The 501st captain wrapped his arms around you, pulling you close to his chest as the tanks exploded. He leapt from the position on the tree and held you close. 

Their rayshields weren’t made for their own shots it seemed. They buckled and broke, breaking down and exploding from their own weaponry. That didn’t stop them from trying to shoot at the clone controlled air support. Thankfully, Fives and Hardcase were doing a good enough job flying; they managed to avoid getting shot down.

Fives and Hardcase skillfully cleared the field. They managed to keep control well enough to finally destroy the heavy tanks that have taken so many good men. As the burst and exploded, killing the Umbarans inside, there were cheers and celebrations.

“Woo-hoo!”

“Attaboy, Hardcase!” 

“Way to go Fives!”

Once Rex stood to cheer with his brothers, you dashed to Kix. The medic had calmed down and was tending to the injured, “I’m entirely out of bacta and gauze.” He looked up at you, “and I can see you’re out of bandages.” 

You nodded, snapping your focus back on the injured troopers. The fight had been brutal. Even those that had managed to get to you alive, were fading fast. For every soldier you saved, it was like two more perished from their wounds. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

You repeated their names. Over and over again in your head. As the quiet took over, Kix helped you with the hurt and dying that crawled their way to your position. You didn’t look up, even as reinforcements ran passed to take that fucking airbase.

“Doc, we need help!” Was the only statement that caused you to bring your eyes up. 

Silk managed to stumble from the smoke. His right arm had been ripped off and his chestplate was shattered. His left hand was placed over his stomach, keeping his innards inside his abdomen. 

“Kix!” You practically howled, bolting from where you were tending to Jesse’s gashed wrist. 

You sent Silk out there! You were the one who asked him to risk his life for others! 

Your hands were on him, getting him to the ground, “I got you, Silk. I got you.” You breathed, ripping off the pieces of his armor. Kix was next to you, scrambling to get the situation under control.

Tup had managed to get a hold of the medical speeder. Krell must’ve finally brought it into the gorge when reinforcements were sent in. Ken and Rin were still on the stretcher, but you didn’t pay them any mind as you threw open crates and bags, scrambling to get supplies. 

Bandages. Bacta. Gauze. Sutures.

Supply levels were low. There wasn’t enough for everyone. But you grabbed everything you could and darted back to Silk.

He was still down, but Kix had stopped trying to treat him. The medic removed his helmet and looked at you, sorrow and despair evident. 

“No!” You dropped what was in your hands and immediately straddled Silk. Your hands were on his chest as you began compressions. The cartilage of his ribs cracked and broke as you began CPR. You were in a frenzy to bring him back, throwing his helmet away to pinch his nose and breathe for him.

Something in you broke. The situation finally hit you and your mind shattered. You sent Silk out to find his brothers. Silk returned injured. Dying. It was your fault. You got Silk killed. 

Dogma was right. You had failed so many of these troopers. They relied on you to keep them alive, and you failed in your duty.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

Tears blurred your vision but you weren’t going to stop. Kix said your name, but you ignored him. He grabbed your shoulder, but you shoved him off, “How long!?” you demanded before getting your lips on Silk’s to force air into his lungs. 

“4 minutes,” Kix informed you, “He’s been down for 4 minutes. It’s time to stop.”

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

“No it isn’t!” you snapped. Kix looked up at someone who approached. Another injured soldier? He could deal with it. You had to save Silk.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

5 minutes now of compressions. 5 minutes of forcing oxygen into Silk’s lungs. 5 minutes of forcing his heart to beat. Yet it couldn’t function on its own. There was too much damage.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

Someone grabbed you and you howled as if burned. Your compressions stopped to thrash and fight. You weren’t giving up. Not on Silk. Too many have been lost. You couldn’t handle losing one more. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

Whoever was holding you had fallen backwards, getting both of you to the ground. They called your name, but you refused to listen. You clawed at their armored wrist, trying to get their hold off of you.

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia.

“I’m not giving up!” Tears were running down your cheeks. You’d finally broken. Under the loss. Under the death and destruction of the soldiers you failed to save. You kicked your legs and tried to get out of the arms that had wrapped around your torso. 

Fyre. Vim. Oz. Ringo. North. Gabe. Tro. Tess. Zeb. Sante. Reign. Pheon. Dawn. Nim. Jamie. Hek. Recon. Mav. Zeo. Fisher. Hinge. Trident. Iron. Mesh. Steele. Bruno. Zeke. Jumper. Aura. Dia. Silk. 

Silk.

Silk.

Silk.

“I know.” Their words, Rex’s, finally reached you. He was hugging you from behind so tightly, “I know, Mesh’la. I know.” His helmet was off and he whispered softly into your ear.

Your breath shook as you let out a wretched sob. You’ve lost soldiers before. They’ve died under your care. But never this many. 

Too many. There were too many! 

You wept, leaning into Rex’s chest, “I’m sorry…” you cried out, “I can’t save them. I can’t…I’m sorry Rex…Please…forgive me!” Your begging and pleading devolved into more sobbing. You’ve failed him. You’ve failed the man you loved and all of his brothers.

Rex remained silent, continuing to hold you.

[lensman-arms-race]

Episode 77 part 3 and 4

(I was going to make a post with parts 3 and 4, but ran into the Tumblr image limit! I'll make another post about part 4.)

Previously: Episode 77 part 1, Episode 77 part 2

DFB has given us TV-simps some delicious food!! And I had five asks about this! Spoilers under the cut.

Pile of asks:

Anonymous:

Now that episode 77 is done what do you think is the 'plot twist'? I found 'hardware heads were human' from part 2 to be a lot more shocking than G-Man helping The Alliance.

@some-girl-i-guess-1

Did you see the new episode? What are your thoughts about it?

@gamie99

I love reading your episode reviews because you always have so much to say! And I'm sure you have SO many thoughts about this one, because HOLY COW.

Anonymous:

The latest part of the episode was pretty crazy what did you think about it? What do you think will occur in the full episode?

@love-draw-fanart

After watching 77 part 4, I started imagining Titan-TV fighting with his ghost if his body was destroyed 🤣🤣🤣🤣 very, veryyyyyy "you can't kill the death"

Part 3:

I'm a little disappointed that Cam Matriarch appears to have lost her tortoise mode + flechette cannon, because that was what made me love her in the first place! The flying cannon replacement is pretty cool... but it's sad how all the cute robots are becoming badass rather than cute.

Wonder what the 'there are 3 Polycephalies' crowd will have to say about this? Will they think there are 2 Cam Matriarchs?

The distant 'hee hee' at this point was funny as hell! I do love how Boom breaks up tension with funny parts like this.

Not only has Cam Matriarch inherited Plunk's weapons, but also his idiot ball, apparently. Mate, you can't defeat that bastard, he's like a fucking battleship.

See, TV Matriarch agrees with me... Wait... there's absolutely no need for TV Matriarch to put her hand on Cam Matriarch's boob - she's copping a feel!

Also, holy crap, how have I only just noticed Cam Matriarch's goth boots?

Polycephaly, my beloved! And what an entrance! I swoon!

My earlier point about robots becoming badass but losing some of their cute appeal still stands. The head upgrades make sense tactically but they're uncute. And my boy's lost his cuddly tendrils! Now he's got Ass-tro tech bolted on him.

Also he looks goofy with his tie tucked into his trousers instead of his waistcoat. Boo.

There was a visual glitch at this point in which Buzzsaw's helmet temporarily despawned, but Boom appears to have fixed it.

"Someone is dying... and it's not me." OUGGGHHH HOLY CRAP!! Titan TV, my beloved!!

Also he flares out his back-spikes at this point and it's so good, hnnnngh.

Fuckin' no-sells the Astro projectiles.

Interestingly, Titan TV now appears to have the ability to fire off little 'pellets' of energy from his core instead of just a huge-ass blast (note hyphen position; that's huge-ass blast, not huge ass-blast).

After swiping away the Astro projectiles, Titan TV proceeds to get one of his monitor extensions chewed off. Oops. He seems strangely unbothered by this! It almost looks as though he turns his head towards the Astro to let it happen.

Excellent Astro grump face:

"Look at me!" (Okay, but why didn't you do that before Matey Boy bit your screen off?)

Goddamn, I love what Boom does with Toilet expressions; they're hilarious!

Decapitation!

Unfortunately, some other fucker arrives and manages to both deplete the Titan's back-spikes and smash his main screen.

The Astro strider appears to break the Titan's screen by getting behind his head and then suddenly pushing his head forward. Did the Titan's screen break on his own core-spikes? Or just from the stress on his head-casing?

The Titan does appear to catch the Astro in his back-spikes (and then fling the Astro away), which presumably is how the Astro breaks some of the spikes off.

"Your Titan wouldn't want you to die meaninglessly. Leave, while you still can." TVs are rude fuckers but they do still care about their comrades! That's why I love them best.

This prick shows up. I get the feeling they were muttering 'If you want something done right, do it yourself'. This Astro fights more competently than the last two.

Fortunately, Titan TV is saved from total annihilation by the Cams firing a shot from their tank, which buys the Titan enough time to counter-attack... and say a very curious line.

"You can't kill the dead!"

Is this just trash-talking, or an actual lore drop?? "I'll show you what the other side looks like!"

Is this an implication that TVs come from dead humans (or believe that they do)? Maybe TVs believe that they're already dead, because the state of the world is so shitty that it must be already Hell?

Or maybe this is just like Pete Weber, who got so excited bowling that he ended up saying "Who do you think you are? I am! Dammit right!"

Either way, we're treated to one of the most brutal deaths in the series, in which Titan TV crushes the Astro's head in his bare hands.

Polycephaly comforts the dying Cam who managed to fire the distracting shot. "You did well, lil bro." My heart!

"We teleported everyone to base." Except POV Cam, because they smell.

Also where's your head-turrets? (I hope Boom puts them back in the full episode.)

Titan TV is wrecked but is still spoiling for a rumble. Part 3 ends with him calling out the arriving Astros as 'pathetic trash' and demanding to fight Juggernaut. (One detail I liked here is that we hear the rhythmic clanking sound of Titan TV's core claws, rotating but no longer smoothly. It's rather like the ominous ticking of a clock signalling impending doom.)

Wait... if he has no working TV screens, he's not Titan TV Man. He's just Titan Man. Ehehe.

It's a little surprising how 2-dimensional these fights are - as in the characters stay in one plane close to the ground, even though they can all fly. I suppose we'd have to wait even longer between episodes if Boom had to choreograph swooping aerial fights!

[trashquisitor-shirozora]

*enables you* what happened with TLJ 👃

After all these years I still can't properly find words to explain how deeply betrayed I felt after the credits rolled and I shuffled out of the movie theater with everybody else. There was a TON of hype surrounding this movie, an absolute fuckton. I only saw positive reviews about it, the cast, the director, the plot. I got excited to see where Rian Johnson & Co. would take the ST.

The only remotely negative comment I saw before watching the movie was a fandom blog saying they didn't like what happened to Poe. Since this blog was about racism in fandom, I knew something was off. That was my only warning.

And y'know, it was like, five minutes in? Ten minutes? And Poe makes a "Yo mama" joke at Hux? I used to go into movies with an open mind and spent days gathering my thoughts about them because I was always slow to react, slow to gather my thoughts into coherent strings of words. It's how I enjoyed Michael Bay productions and JJ Abrams' love affair with lens flare. I never got actively angry with a movie I was watching, and I was fucking angry by the time the movie ended. I still remember texting a friend while standing out in front of the theater because I was so confused. The response to TLJ was so positive so why did I come out of the movie so frustrated and confused and dissatisfied with the whole thing?

It's been years and we all know how this movie divided the Star Wars fandom and just... broke Fandom Spaces in a way I never expected. We all know what TLJ did and didn't do, and how TROS provided the final nail in the coffin that was the ST experiment. But back then, all I saw was positive commentary about the themes and messages of TLJ, how it portrayed failure and the dangers of putting someone like Luke Skywalker on a pedestal, how the Force was female, how... important it was to see Poe get characterized as a hotheaded hotshot who needed to be demoted, slapped around, and stunned in order to learn some kind of lesson, how important it was to see Finn lose everything he gained in TFA so that he could relearn how not to be selfish or something while starring in a fucking incredibly tone-deaf B plot, how Rey... I'm not sure exactly what because she didn't need training anyway and then spent most of her time trying to bring Ben Swolo back to the light????? Rose was so promising as someone who grew up under the FO's thumb but she and Kelly were fucking abandoned by Disney so I don't know if Rose existing was actually a good idea if it meant giving Kelly unending trauma. Mark slipped up by calling Luke "Jake" and expressing his displeasure in front of cameras, and I was so fucking baffled and alienated by his character after knowing how his story ended in ROTJ that I couldn't connect with whatever lessons I and he are supposed to be learning. JJ set up Snoke like a mystery box and Rian just yeeted him off without so much as a fucking explanation so what was the point of that? Hux was a fucking joke. Phasma was barely there. The only character that Rian cared about was fucking Kylo Ren and Adam says years later that he was never supposed to get a redemption arc anyway.

Like, this was the movie everyone hyped up? This was the movie that didn't answer any questions left unasked by TFA and didn't bother to move forward with character development for any of the known characters? I spent money watching a slow space chase that ended on a planet made of salt and killed off Luke for Reasons? Am I stupid? Am I dumb? Am I a peasant incapable of understanding the masterpiece Rian directed, this so-called Best Star Wars Movie Since ESB?

But I couldn't say anything. I couldn't be dogpiled for hating such a empowering movie for women, a diverse and inclusive movie that had the likes of John and Kelly and Oscar. I couldn't be lumped in with the Star Wars dudebros with their raging misogynistic and racist takes on the movie, the cast, Kathleen Kennedy and Lucasfilm, Disney, etc. I couldn't be seen as one of them just because I didn't like a movie that I should like, I'm supposed to like. So I sat in silence, read meta, witnessed the fucking catastrophic explosion around some wild ass AO3 fandom essays written by a racist OG member of OTW about Finn/Poe, saw hate piled on black and bipoc fans, saw r*ylo fans come for John and John clap back at them, just saw an absolute fuckton of hate, and so by the time TROS came around I just... checked out. There was no way JJ could salvage what Rian had done and I was right. TROS was a corporate-run soulless garbage end to the Sequel Trilogy, but it ended just as The Mandalorian finished its first season and regained a lot of good will with this small story about a lonely Mandalorian bounty hunter who encountered a Force-sensitive Baby Yoda.

And then TBOBF/Season 3 of the Mando Show happened, just like how TLJ happened. All the promise, all the unanswered questions of the previous movie/season, all fucking dropped or provided with the worst, most unsatisfying answer. I'm sure others have found better answers and can live with what Star Wars gave us, but I haven't been able to. TLJ came out years and years ago, and I am still so bitter today. I'm still so bitter because TFA had such an incredibly compelling setup with such promising characters, and then TLJ Did That.

I got so heated while writing this. I'm still so mad. I'm still so bitter. I bury my head so deep in the sandbox I built for myself so that I don't have to think how Disney is twisting and contorting all these Mando'verse shows so that they all eventually lead to the ST, their precious hot potato child that just... didn't have to end the way they did if they actually had a fucking plan and fucking stuck the landing. I'll give the MCU this - their Phase 1? They fucking stuck the landing. I fell off the train tracks and haven't really watched the MCU since Captain Marvel, but at least they had a fucking plan and didn't fucking derail themselves like Disney did with the Sequel Trilogy.

I could be nice to people who like this movie but I'm not going to be. They can be nice on their own blogs.

Man, I can't even watch Knives Out or Glass Onion because my blood starts boiling. Just. TLJ did a lot to ruin what I hoped would be a positive and creative connection with Star Wars, and it took the Mando Show and the 2 minutes where Din and Luke locked eyes on the Imperial light cruiser to bring me back.

I'm gonna stop before I get way too heated for sleep.

[deus-sema]

Part of me was expecting disappointment and disappointment is what I got.

I know the rest of the drill. Many shippers will be frustrated today. Antis will be smug and resort to mockery, both indirect and outright.

For now, I'm just reminded of some other ships. Regardless of how one feels about Reylo, it survived the ending of TRoS. Those who still ship it still like it and even its antis cannot move on from it. Another example closer to home would be Daemyra and Helaegon/mond from HotD where the fanon is better than whatever was shown onscreen. Anyway, the point is, wherever there exists chemistry, ships find a way to sustain no matter how many Ls they get.

I won't sermonize my fellow shippers on forced positivity and tell them to not be upset. It's valid to feel disappointed and even more so to vent one's frustrations in whatever capacity possible. Vent away. I will probably join in sometime later after getting some sleep.

But, take care of yourselves too.

[blackswampotter]

Season 1 of The Acolyte is over and I have some thoughts. A lot of thoughts, actually.

Acolyte spoilers below

What a weird show

I ultimately end up feeling the same way I did early on; it's a pretty average show with some great action held back by clunky dialogue, poor pacing, and several fairly dull characters.

And, I could probably leave it there, but I feel like that would ignore a lot of the most interesting elements.

Some of the show's best moments and emotional beats are centered around the character of Master Sol and his death and posthumous betrayal works really, really well. It's probably the most effective thing in the show and gave some genuine pathos to the last episode.

Osha and Mae swapping roles - something started in episode 5 - was also a compelling direction for the show.

Osha's fall to the dark side feels very unique compared to some we've seen before and I think it's because the show positions the Jedi as the antagonists in the end.

It's not framed as tragic, it's framed as brave and almost righteous in a twisted way. As though she's finally becoming who she was really meant to be.

But, you can't really talk about Osha and Qimir without talking about the Reylo sized elephant in the room...

The sequel trilogy had lightning in a fucking bottle with these two. Their chemistry is unreal and the pining, longing glances sell you on the enemies to lovers direction they were moving in.

In the end, Reylo sort of fizzled out with TRoS being unwilling to fully commit to, well, much of anything. But, the Reylo fandom was, and still is, massive.

With The Acolyte, Leslye Headland appears to be trying to capitalize on that kind of dynamic and it's just nowhere near as compelling.

Part of that is the lack of tension between them. Qimir feels so toothless compared to Kylo. Rey and Kylo push against one another. There's hostility, fear, and even some spite.

But, Qimir is just there to facilitate Osha's story. He doesn't feel like an independent actor playing off Osha in an interesting way.

Their dynamic feels like a sanitized and sanded down version of Reylo without any of rough edges that actually made Reylo compelling.

Finally, there's the Glup Shitto of it all.

So, somebody who looks an awful lot like Legends Darth Plagueis shows up for five seconds and I imagine that's going to be the biggest point of discussion online.

It's hilarious because he's just sort of there, poking his head around the corner like he's part of the goddamn Scooby gang.

My initial prediction was that Qimir was going to be revealed to be a Knight of Ren (Kylo's theme can be heard when he shows up), but now I'm wondering if he is, in fact, being trained by Plagueis.

Perhaps he and Osha will break away from Plagueis in season 2 and create the Knights of Ren, but that's assuming we get a season 2.

The response to this show has been disgusting from the beginning. Just mountains of idiots who hate anything with diversity and go out of their way to read everything in the most bad faith way possible.

I don't even think the show is all that great, but it's not because there are women and people of color in it.

It's kind of ironic then that this show, in a lot of ways, gives that crowd exactly what they've always wanted - over the top saber action, high fantasy Jedi/Force stuff, and Darth Plagueis.

I guess we'll see if they change their tune or if their whinging is enough to prevent a season 2 from being greenlit, because I honestly think the show deserves to keep going, even if I think it's pretty far from perfect.

[thewayofthetrashcompactor]

Showing young Ben as thinking "maybe the Empire was right" is just such a fundamental misunderstanding of his storyline and what happened to him. He had the literal star wars personification of evil inside his head from a young age (originally shown in the comics, confirmed on screen in tRoS), telling him that maybe he was evil too, that the people around him knew it. And unintentionally, they play into that, even when they're trying to do their best for him: Leia sends him to train with Luke, hoping her brother who's spent years studying the Force, one of the only people she can trust, will be able to help her son who is struggling with elements she has no experience with, and Palpatine is there to whisper in Ben's mind that this is rejection, they're sending him away because they know he's evil and hate him for it. Luke tries to treat him as equal, and Palpatine is there giving the same explanation of rejection. All this building up to Luke standing over him with his saber, because he's seen the people he loves dying because of this kid, and it's the final confirmation for Ben that everything Palpatine has ever told him is true, that the people who should love him want him dead.

And it's a tragedy, because Leia and Luke (and Han) had no idea what they were fighting against, had no way to understand what was really happening to Ben, and Palpatine has been haunting the Skywalkers since the beginning, taking everything that should've been good in them and twisting it for himself. Ben is an echo of Anakin, where Palpatine was able to speak into the ear of the chosen one and corrupt all his potential because he always has a plan far beyond what the heroes can see. And to heal the wound from Palpatine, Ben should've been able to live free of his influence, but Palpatine succeeded in killing every single one of his family in the end and that's the tragedy we're met with.

But yeah. Positioning Ben as this contrary kid who's taking an edgy political stance to be contrary has nothing to do with his actual character or arc. He never shows any interest in the politics of the First Order throughout the movies or additional material. Maybe you're thinking of Hux.

[gffa]

Hi Lumi! I’m the anon who asked about your thoughts on the sequel trilogy. Thanks for your answer! It made me kind of want to rewatch TROS with this new lens because I do get what you said about the bones of the movie being good. Another thing your post got me thinking about was the concept of “The Chosen One” because I know a lot of people were frustrated that the sequel trilogy seemed to throw Anakin’s last act of bringing balance to the Force out the window. And I got to thinking that nowhere in the originals or prequels does it state that once Anakin brings balance, there will always be balance. Unfortunately, evil rises again. Anakin brought balance and it’s not his fault things became unbalanced again. That doesn’t diminish the moment and impact of his sacrifice. And with Anakin dead and Luke not in a place to answer the Force’s call, the Force needed to find a new Chosen One. And years after the sequel trilogy takes place, there will probably be a new threat that needs a new hero to be called. I kind of like the idea of there being a sort of community of Chosen Ones rather than one person carrying all of that. Anyway, I’ve written a mini essay in your inbox so I’ll sign off now. Thank you for all you do!

Hi again! To be fair, I can't make the movie more polished than it is, it's always going to feel like so much wasted potential, but I do genuinely like the bones of what's there and will always defend that. As for the "Chosen One" thing, that's exactly my view of things, too! Rey being a Chosen One doesn't take away from Anakin being a Chosen One, because, like, what is balance of the Force? It's when there's stability and light in the galaxy. It doesn't mean that the actions of one single Jedi fix all the problems, it means they take the Sith Lord out and the galaxy has to help heal things. Anakin killing Palpatine doesn't mean the Empire suddenly implodes, it means that without the Emperor there, the Rebellion can get to work on establishing the New Republic, it means everyday people can start cleaning up the mess of the Empire. Anakin is the Chosen One meant to destroy the Sith and balance can be restored through that. But what happens when the galaxy gets lazy and the New Republic isn't proactive enough? What happens when people decide to rest on Luke Skywalker and Leia Organa's laurels? Evil rises again. And looking around the world today, that's an incredibly salient message, especially when this movie came out. "Oh, we beat the Nazis in the previous generation, we don't have to pay attention to that anymore!" Yeah, we fucking do. And Luke's not there to be called on to defeat the rise of the First Order, he's cut himself off from the Force. So, the Force chooses a new Chosen One, Rey, and puts her in the position this time, she destroys the Sith, but the galaxy still has to rise up and help her on the bigger stuff. One Jedi cannot defeat the entire oppressive regime, but everyone in the galaxy standing up to fight back against the First Order? That is what balance should be. Rey removes the Sith Lord, so that the rest of the galaxy can help each other again. Because I don't think one Sith Lord can be the sum total of what determines balance. The Force lives in everything, every living thing has the Force moving through it, every living thing contributes to the Force. If the quintillions of people in the galaxy are suffering, if they're angry at the state of what's happening, if they're hurting, then how can that not affect the Force? One Jedi can't fix all that, but if Rey gets rid of the Sith Lord and the rest of the galaxy says, yes, we are going to help this time, we're determined, we're going to hold on to hope, we're going to fight to help others, which they can do because the worst part of the catalyzing of those feelings is gone? Then I really love that as a message. Rey being a Chosen One doesn't take anything away from Anakin being the Chosen One of his time, because they're not the sole determiners of the Force. Everyone has to do their part, no matter how big or small, that fits the theme of "balance" so much better imo.

[reylo]

The Acolyte... I saw the pictures and was like ' Eh' Star Wars for me was tainted after TROS. I really didn't feel like watching anything . Even Andor ( which I love Rogue One btw). So when I found out that this new show was like Reylo. My initial thought was " Well shit. Here we go again." And not in the good way. But here I am now watching it and enjoying it and planning to watch Andor as well. I really hope Disney/Lucasfilms don't burn another thing to the ground based on opinions. TROS did a number on my love for Star Wars and it was sad. What convinced me was actually your blog that said the show was good. So I decided to take a look. And so far I don't regret it.

I was on the same boat as you, Anon. After tros I gave up with sw. It burned me baaaaaad. I wasn't going to watch The Acolyte, but that one scene in episode 5 with the reylo vibes got me intrigued. Then episode 6 happened and I was SHOOKETH!

I'm still wary - once bitten, twice shy, you know - but the interviews from the writers and cast have been so positive about the ship! One of the writers is even a reylo shipper! It's so refreshing and such a delightful contrast to how we reylos got treated. I know sometimes we got positive stuff from writers/cast, but other times we were just thrown to the wolves 😭 This time though its just been validation after validation! I think we might be in good hands. We just need a season 2!!

I'm so glad you decided to watch it!! Have you seen episode 6 yet 👀

If you're into oshamir, I will say most of the fandoms on twitter or hidden in discords- if you need a link, let me know!