#tribe headers

[estrelinha-s]

★ . . girls group layouts ( tumblr ) 𖹭

☆. . like or reblog if you like, save or use! hey, don't republish without  credits!!

[hopkei]

Keito and Sota x CanCam

[romana-after-dark]

Our Gentle Sins: Part 7

Dark!Logan Howlett x fem!reader

My god this header is ass but I was an emo kid what can I say

Series Masterlist : Main Masterlist : Logan Masterlist

Spotify Playlist

Follow @romana-updates and click follow, join my tumblr community or ask to join the tag list to keep up!

Buy Me A Coffee : Kofi : Go Fund Me

Chapter summary: Past. Logan has a nightmare. Present. You have a nightmare.

Warnings: This fic features non con, pregnancy, and themes of religous trauma. I will not be saying everything that happens to warm you, by clicking read more you are prepared for extremely dark themes and that you at 18+. You are responsible for your own media consumption.

EXTRA WARNING!!!!: Pretty graphic. Again, I cant and wont tag everything but I dont wanna throw you off.

2.3 words

Before

“Logan?”

Your voice broke through the noise, the sound of machine guns and children screaming and a bomb dropped in the distance but he heard you. Everything was disjointed, every war, just or unjust, melded into others. Nazi’s shot by WWI German troops, a confederate soldier beheading an English man, Indigenous tribes fighting alongside terrorists, a confusing group to say the least. Still, he heard you.

“Logan!”

You, standing in the middle of it all in a modest pink dress. You, pristine as if you were teaching a class but surrounded by blood and bodies and murdered innocents. You, who when he blinked, was covered in blood but not from bullets or beyonets or gunned up airplanes, but slashed up like Freddy Kruger was hopping his way into his dream. You were holding your stomach, scrambling to keep your guts inside yourself. He was trying to reach you, but hands pulled him back. He couldn’t see faces, but Logan knew they were the hands of all those he’d killed. In front of him, separating Logan from you now, were other. Scott, Charles, Jean, everyone who’d told him to stay away from you.

They aren’t helping you, they aren’t even trying. Instead, they just admonish Logan.

“See what you've done?” Jean asks, and Logan tries to push through.

“She’s bleeding! She needs help!” He screams and screams, watching as you fall to your knees, blood beginning to spill out your mouth. “I need to help her!”

Charles now, voice calm. “I think you’ve done enough.”

“No! I didn’t hurt her! I’d never hurt her! Please, Dolly! Dolly I’m coming!”

Scott, for some reason without his glasses. “We knew this would happen, we knew you couldn’t be trusted, Logan.”

“I wouldn’t hurt her! PLEASE! Just- Let me- DOLLY!!!”

You’ve collapsed, convulsing on the ground as you shout his name over and over again. Logan screams for you, using all his strength to try and get away, to help you, get you out of the war zone and to help, but the weight of the hands around him are too much. They pull and grasp and voices moan in agony behind him.

They pull him away from you.

“LOGAN! WAKE UP!”

Then his eyes are open, claws out and he’s scanning his dark bedroom for the danger, the danger he knows has to be there because why else would he be so fucking scared? But then he turns and he sees you, standing in the corner with your arms crossed over yourself and and he thinks back to the scene in his head where you were dying and Logan almost runs to you- but when he moves, he sees you flinch.

There is a long, long moment where the only thing breaking the silence were your ragged breaths and the pounding of blood in his ears, eyes inter looked in mutual fear. Logan looked at you like you were a spooked deer, even though it was him that felt an unyielding terror inside. You stood in PJ’s, and as his eyes adjusted he took in the new side of you, clothing revealing more than skin you didn’t show. You slept in a dress. Not pants and a top, not a dress meaning lingerie or something cute. Logan thinks for a moment of those outfits worn on the Amazonian Islands in the 70’s Wonder Woman show, how it was just lingerie. No, nothing like that. You just wore a dress, something akin to what he’d seen women wear more than 100 years ago, something a grandma would wear now, a skirt that went to the mid-shin.

Even in the privacy of your own bedroom, you weren’t free from the rhetoric. He bet you wore cotton panties.

You were the first to speak, voice soft and careful as if you weren’t the one shaking. “Are you… okay?”

You, sweet beautiful you, were concerned about him. He’d had a nightmare, because of course he had, of course he could never be free from all the before… but he was okay. 

“Yeah, I uh…” Logan ran a finger over his face, shaking off the tremors. “Nightmare.”

A little nod from your head, then your voice, barely audible. “I get them too.”

Of course you did. Of course a sweet wonderful little doll like you was plagued like this. 

Logan relaxes, shoulders slumping and he slides his legs over the side of the bed before burying his face in his hands. “I’ll kill him, you know.” He mumbles. “Just tell me anything, anything about him and I can track him down. Anything about you.”

The name you used wasn’t a real name. You’d chosen from some woman in the bible you admired, a jewish woman who used her beauty to seduce an enemy and slayed him. Judith was the subject of two Artemisia Gentileschi paintings, hence his familiarity. Logan wasn’t an art guy, but being the history teacher he’d had to brush up on his renaissance art. Your last name was fake too, something you and Charles drummed up and probably had some other religious significance, although he wasn’t religious enough to know. Maybe he’d ask Kurt. 

It’d all been faked and slapped on some ID’s no one would ever be able to tell weren’t real. Your new identity was sealed. Even if you left the school, you could go on. Charles had even faked an education degree and high school diploma when you promised to not use it to do anything you weren’t qualified for. Charles didn’t want you to be trapped at the school, and since the school had been your only option at the time, you’d been given a freedom to leave. This was more than your husband had ever done, keeping you trapped and helpless, not even knowing how to drive. 

All he needed was your real name, and he could track your husband down and bring his head on a platter like John the Baptist. Was that a Gentileschi painting, or was that Caravagio?

“I know.” Your voice breaks him out of his thoughts like you had done with his nightmare. “Which is why I won’t tell you.”

When Logan looks up, he sees you still standing so far away from him, and chuckles dryly. “You scared of me now, doll face?”

You shake your head no, but it’s not as confident as he’d have liked.

“I’m in my pajamas. You’re shirtless in shorts. There’s a bed.”

His eyebrows rose at that. “You think I’d do something to you?”

This time, when you shake your head, it’s much firmer. “No. Absolutely not. It’s just… I was always taught to never be in a man’s bedroom… or I might bring something on myself, or it would lead me to sin, or, or there’s something about the appearance of sin… I dunno, it’s just considered improper.”

He let the words settle into his skin. Sometimes, loving you was like the women he’d loved, bedded, courted so long ago. Such a different time, a different world. Yet you were still so different. Back then, women were just waiting for someone to untether them, give them an out, run away. They craved that freedom, the liberty sex brings. Logan didn’t know what you craved. There was nothing inside you that said you wanted to scream, to be unhinged, to let go. You weren’t a bubble waiting to pop, you were simply happy to be as you were, dresses and all.

“I understand, Dolly. Thank you for uh, for waking me. But you should really just let me be, next time.” Flashes of Rogue all bloodied in his arms flattered across Logan’s memory. Kayla, scratched up before his bones became the weapon they are now.  “I might accidentally hurt you.”

Something he doesn’t recognize flashes on your face before you give a little nod. “Are you alright? I can go make you some tea?”

Part of Logan wanted to say yes, because he loved when you made him tea, but you looked tired. “No, thank you doll. I’m alright. Are you sure you’re okay? You’re acting weird.”

“Thanks kinda my thing, isn’t it?” You smile just a little, making a bit of a face as you walk sideways towards the door. “Little homeschooled teen marriage weirdo?”

Logan’s eyes narrowed at your weird behavior, not turning your back to him, but he decided he didn’t need to question your every move.

“You’re not a weirdo. You’re one of the coolest people I know.”

You laugh at that, eyes bright as always, and slide out the door.

After

You scream. And scream. And scream, over and over again. There’s blood everywhere. Logan tore everyone you loved apart; your students, your fellow teachers, Scott, Jean, Kurt, Emma, Charles. Every single one was hacked to pieces. Logan pinned you to the ground, pounding into your cunt as if you were just a lifeless doll. You didn’t fight. You didn’t scream. Were you screaming before? You can’t remember now.

Lifeless you lay, head lulled to the side as Logan fucked you. There was blood coming out of your cunt, but you didn’t know how you knew that. Spread and prone and stretched you took what Logan gave you, his soft words grunting in your ear.

“Isn’t this better, doll? Not fighting? See, I can make it good for you. I can make you wet. You’re so wet for me, my little submissive dolly.” It wasn’t blood between your legs anymore, it was cum as an uncomfortable orgasm swelled through your body. Still, ever so still, you never moved. Remy lay next to you, unrecognizable outside of intuition as he’s just a pile of slashed flesh now.

“My perfect, lifeless doll.” You’re pliant in his hands.

Suddenly Scott is in front of you, a bodiless head , eyes gouged out of his face, nothing but bloody pits. Still he speaks.

“You did this.”

No. No you’d never-

“You’re dangerous. Violence follows you. You’re a grenade.”

It wasn’t you! It was Logan!

“It hasn’t always been Logan. But it’s always been you. You are the common denominator.”

You blink and it’s no longer the friends and family and children of your new life. It’s your mom and dad, siblings, in laws, everyone who meant something to you before. 

It’s your husband between your legs now, and you think there is nothing possible worse than this, nothing could be worse than him being back. Everything you went through, it’s never going to end. You’re dying. Maybe you’re dead because you’re watching from above now, your body on the ground and cold.

Your husband strokes your lifeless, compliant form. “The perfect wife.”

You’re back in your body, your mother lying next to you now. “Why couldn’t you just be good?”

You wake up to Remy shaking you.

His voice is an immediate calm, a recognition that he isn’t dead, he’s not a mass of gore on the floor while you’re being raped, killed for something you’ve done that you didn’t even know what. He’s alive.

“Remy!” You grab his shirt, pulling him to you and you don’t care that he’s a man half on your bed. He’s alive. Remy has often woken you from nightmares, his room right next to yours. Remy was closer, but Logan could hear you from further. Still, Remy was a light sleeper, so he usually got to you before Logan was aware.

Once you let go, Remy took several steps back, right up against the wall. This was something Remy did to prevent further anxiety. You trusted Remy fully, you never got an inkling that he wanted to fuck you or was playing the long game, just that he wanted to help you.

“They are getting worse again, pistache. It’s more often than when you first came here.”

You pull your blanket close to your chest even though you were fully covered. Remy slept in boxers, but he wore a robe around himself, something he bought after the first time he helped you through a nightmare. He came in in just his underwear and you were only three days into joining the school. Needless to say, seeing a man almost naked had scared the ever living hell out of you, so Remy bought a robe to cover up without having to waste time dressing. He was thoughtful like that. 

“I know, I know. I just… stress… I got the prom coming up, been a lot.”

Remy frowned, “Planning a high school dance shouldn’t trigger nightmares. Is this because of what happened at the ball?”

You wince. That memory was a lot, something that you didn’t like to think about. You doubted Scott did either, and if his jaw was ever the same. 

You took to long to answer, looking down at your blanket, so Remy continued. “I know that you and Logan have had… a falling out.” Your heart clenches at the words, heat flushing over your skin. Your blanket hid what you had been under loose clothing; a bump. You tuck your knees up so the blanket downs fall over your stomach. “I think he can fix it. You and him… well, I thought you’d get along before you ever met him. I brought your down stairs that first day because I’d seen him walking in, sent him to the store with you, sent him to have lunch… I think you two suit each other.” Remy gives you a smile. “You soften him. He protects you. It’s good for you both. Whatever it is, I think you can fix it. That’s all I’ll say.”

Remy stayed true to his word, not continuing about it… but you couldn’t help thinking how horrified he’d be if he found out what Logan did to you. He’s still gone, coming back any day now. Remy thought you softened him, and you suppose you did. For a while. 

You let Remy get you a snack, a little sweet treat to get the sick taste out of your mouth and cheer you up. He was kind, attentive, but the memory of him as nothing but a pile of slosh haunted you. Logan was dangerous. You were already worried about Scott prying where he didn’t need to, worrying about him getting himself killed, but now you think about Remy. What will he do when he learned Logan raped a baby into you?

Logan returns to his dolly next chapter! Next chapter we have 2 dances. Past, a ball Dolly put on because of the pride and prejuduce unit for her lit class, and presant she put on a sort of prom for the teenagers.

That chapter is where we get another HUGE chunk of dolly's past! the final bombwill be nearer to the end. I'd LOVE to hear your thoughts on what you think dollys secrets are!!! There was a hint this chapter!

Ideas for a poll is always welcome! as are songs for the playlist

I need to make a better cover pic now that ive gotten a feel for the series and its themes

If you've read Rooms on Fire or The Wrong Way, you know I tend to write a similar type for these dark series. Dolly, Little one and Madonna are all girly, quieter, feminine, submissive types. I hope that those whove read it all, because i know some people have read most things i put out, don find dolly boring. I think all three are unique in their own ways, and Dolly has her own things too, even if she's quiet and nervous

I love all yall and am so thankful for the support ive gotten here!!!!!

please remember, comments keep me writing. It doesnt have to be a compiment, just something that shows engagment like "remy is a good friend"

@multiversed-daydreamer @my-secret-shame-but-fanfiction @del-ightfulling @miraclesabound @hindi-si-ikay @samsamsantos @madamerubrum @shybluebirdninja a @hornystan @rogueinmymind @accountforreading123 @yawnetu @princessanglophile @and-claudia @new-genesis1000 @teaganthemorningstar @oldloganslittleslut @zaggprincess2 @bugsinmyeyez @groundclueless @cosmolight

[neteyamslovrr]

RETURN - PT3

summary: five years ago he left you. left you alone with nothing but memories of your love. so how dare he come back now?

contents: 2.8k words, depression, angst, slight conflict, not very well proof read but that brings authenticity lmao

authors note: thankyou all for being so patient with my upload <33 ALSO LOOK AT WHAT MY BAE @cinetrix made omg (its the header pic) THATS GROWN UP NETEYAM THATS OUR BABY hes so handsome and bae is so talented and kind

previous / next

It had been over a month since they Sully’s had returned to the clan. While they slid back into their forest way of life, like a lost puzzle piece that was finally found you felt like you were back to being a bunch on scrambled up pieces with no way to connect yourself back together again.

Seeing him was a constant reminder of the despair that took over your life for years. The rotted you from the inside out leaving you as a shell of a woman as he took your soul with him when he left.

Those closest to you noticed your decline. Especially Mo’at. Someone you had to start seeing regularly due to your mothers pestering.

“Child…it is not hard to see the way your spirit has left you.” She spoke softly yet with so much truth it felt as is she had stabbed you with a dagger.

You were sat on the floor of her large medical tent that was set up in High camp. It was cold, the cool breeze making the fine hairs in your body stand up as you consciously avoided any gaze that Mo’at threw at you.

“He took it with him.” It felt like a deep dark secret that you had ripped out of your throat as it sliced its way up. Admitting that Neteyam had broken you so much that he had managed to start cracking you away with his return made you feel weak. Made you feel defeated.

“Maybe…he is here to give it back.” Mo’at sighed softly, a kind hand pushing your hair out of your face as she crouched in front of you. “Dear child your heart cries out. You must listen when your body talks to you.”

“I am afraid, so afraid.” Mo’at nodded letting you fall into her arms, a much needed hug that you craved for.

“Fear is never unreasonable child, but do not let cowardice infect your heart like it infected his.”

Neteyam had desperately tried to even get you to look at him after the last time you both conversed. It ended in him running away. As soon as he walked off he wished he could have socked Va’tep. Knocked him hard enough that his grubby paws would never caress your precious skin ever again.

He would try and talk to you only to be shut down by a harsh glare or excuse to leave. However whenever he even entered the same room as you he would immediately watch you excuse yourself and leave.

And Eywa did it crush him. To see how opposed he was to your presence. To see how his face repulsed you so much. He knew it was naïve to think he could return to you running into his arms so he could spin you around and hold you close. It was stupid for him to think you would ever wait for him. Not when he abandoned you.

A habit he had as a child was always to go to his grandmother for wisdom. Something he had sorely lacked the past half decade. He knew you were close with her. He knew she was the wisest woman this tribe had. But he was also terrified of a reality check that would hit him so harshly he wouldn’t know how to react. That’s why he was so resistant on approaching Mo’at.

But when he looked over to the top levels of High Camp where you and Va’tep had sat yourselves as you weaved expertly. He saw the way Va’tep’s smile was not as wide as it could be, he noticed that your eyes never met his even as you talked. He stared closely, squinting his eyes to focus on how Va’tep’s hands would crawl up your thigh and your body would stiffen and squirm instead on relaxing into the touch. As if his hands were grating your perfect skin.

When he saw how miserable you were when you looked away from Va’tep to wipe your eyes subtly. His heart sunk. He could not go on without you, he couldn’t continue without being able to get you back.

Neteyam hesitantly opened the curtains of his grandmother’s tent as he sucked in a nervous breath.

Her ears perked up immediately to the sound. “Neteyam…I expected you sooner child.” Her eyes were always sharp, enough to slice the strongest man in half.

Neteyam let out a soft chuckle. “I assume you know why I am here.” He sat beside her, shuffling awkwardly on the mat so he could watch his grandmother mush together fine pastes that turned into her medicines .

“Is she troubling your mind?” Even the mention of your cut his soul, like a sweet melody that sudden struck the wrong chord.

“Grandmother… I know I messed up. I know I abandoned her… if I could take back everything I did, I would in a heartbeat.” His voice was pained, head hung low in shame. “I just… I just want her back.”

Mo’at nodded as she laid an empathetic hand on his back. “You must give her time…”

“But I have already been here for so long! I know I was gone for so…so long but I thought she may have at least… warmed up to me slightly. I don’t expect her to change completely. I just want to be able to talk to her, look into her eyes. I miss the warmth I felt when I saw her smile…I never see her smile anymore.”

Neteyam tried desperately not to cry, but oh how difficult it was when he felt the weight of your absence lay so heavily on his chest.

Mo’at let out a sigh, one that felt heavy, one that changed the atmosphere as she exhaled. “She is scared child. She was…she was gone once you left. Your absence was sorely missed, but it truly broke her. There was nothing left of her when you left.”

Neteyam said nothing, though his eyes begged for some sort of explanation, his pupils pleaded as his entire focus was centred on the words exiting his grandmother’s mouth.

Mo’at sucked in a sharp breath, repeating your despair was always hard, to think you experienced such depression. “The day you left she didn’t stop crying. For days she replaced the strongest waterfall in the forest. Her sobs racked through the village as she cried your name out. She screamed it in her sleep, she sobbed it as she woke. She was completely broken. But that was not the worst of it.”

Neteyam already felt his heart sinking. It floated down as he thought more about the anguish he had caused you. His ears hung low in shame as he attentively listen as Mo’at continued to speak.

“It was after the tears. The acceptance. The betrayal. She was no longer her, she was a shell, a corpse. The poor child…she didn’t move for months. No one could get her to leave her hammock, she laid there for days, she didn’t eat, didn’t sleep, didn’t speak. She was nothing.”

Neteyam let out a whimper. One that tried to cover up the sob that was aching to escape him. Guilt racked through him as he could barely look in Mo’at’s eyes as she continued to speak.

“Some days I look back and remember the state she was in, the way her body was so frail, so weak. She was so sick, riddled with the disease of heartbreak. My child I know you left her here because it was safe. Child I know you thought were saving your lover. But Neteyam…she does not want to remember her anguish, but every time she looks at you she is remembered of those times.”

“What could I possibly do” His voice is raspy and quiet. Barely able to let out a noise as his throat betrays him.

“Create new memories, let her remember new days with you, why she loved you so much. Enable her to let go of the sadness she holds in her heart that filled in the place you took from her.”

Neteyam nods. His mind swirling as a million epiphanies hit him at once. There was no way he could ever forgive himself for causing you sorrow, but he only prayed that you would be able to feel enough forgiveness to let him put back the missing puzzle piece in the jigsaw of your heart.

Va’tep was Tarsem’s brother, the Olo’eyktan. So Va’tep was his right hand man, right beside him through every decision and every battle. Which meant as Va’tep’s promised mate, had a large amount of expected participation in war party meeting such as this.

“If we attack from the east we will get a clear shot towards the demons.” Va’tep said as he drew out a map with a stick onto the large plot of dirt that everyone was circled around.

You couldn’t help but notice the flaws in his plan. East was directly in front of the base the demons had there. While we would have clear a view…there would be significantly more danger.

“Va’tep…I think we should maybe approach it from the south.” You hated speaking up in these meetings, as all the warriors’ beady eyes locked onto you. It made you queasy, as if you were going to spew instead of saying the words you were thinking.

Va’tep’s eyes sharpen as he looks as if you had slapped him across the face with your suggestion. “The south has many sight obstacles…it will be harder to navigate” His voice was deep, and husky. It was obvious he was starting to fume.

“But the base is right there. It would be dangerous to approach that direction!” You raise your voice slightly, only in a way to show how desperate you were to get your point across.

Neteyam watched this interaction closely. Studying every single inch of your body language. He always knew how wise you were when it came to stuff like this. You were always calculating the best solution for anything that may spring up in the battlefield. When Jake was Olo’eyktan, you were one of his greatest assets because of your knowledge.

The back and forth goes on for a while as no other warrior dared to speak up. Until he did. Neteyam of course.

“She’s right…there would be much more danger if we were to take the East route.” As soon as you heard his voice it felt like a spotlight of hope was shun onto your heart.

Va’tep grunted at the unwanted input. “The South route is a cowardice route. Something I guess you can sympathize with.” His words were like venom, scorching Neteyam as he stared daggers into him.

“The East route is brazen, unsafe and uncalculated. Something you definitely can understand. Isn’t that right Va’tep?” Neteyam rarely stooped to a level this low, but with the overhanging threat of you being shut down by your ‘mate’ was enough to make Neteyam seethe.

“I’ll show you something you’ll understand-”

Va’tep fumed as Tarsem decided it was his time to step in, changing the subject and postponing the decision for further analysis. But you didn’t forget the way your heart-beat as Neteyam supported you. Something you hadn’t felt in a long time. Supported.

The day turned to dusk as you sat by the river, kicking your feet in the cool water as you listened to the world around you. Each sound was perfectly tuned together, a perfect song of the world.

You heart-beat is slow, resting on your hands as the dirt meets your soft palms. Your eyes closed to protect themselves from the harsh rays of light that shun down onto your body. It was peaceful, it was calm.

The unfamiliar sound of crunching leaves grew behind you. Ears perked up tail swishing in alert you turn to see Neteyam approaching.

You can’t deny the dread you feel when you see him. And you can’t deny the way your heart beats like crazy whenever you are close enough to see how much he grew. How much he changed.

You wonder if he thought about you. If he ever noticed the changes of your mature figure or if he couldn’t notice if you looked different to how he remembered you.

“Hey you.” His voice was sweet and musky, enough to send shivers down your spine as you refused to meet his golden eyes.

“Hi there.” Your voice was always quiet…but these five years made it dull. As if there was nothing much else for it to be excited  about.

“I thought I would find you here.” Your brows moved in curiosity, body facing him as he sat beside you, waving his defined legs in the water.

“Why’s that?”

“This was our river…do you remember.” Oh you remember. How could you forget. This river was the one thing you held into when he left. As you slept on the riverbed pretending the rushing water was his soft voice hushing you to sleep.

“Yes…I do.” Neteyam felt a rush of joy run through him. Maybe it was hope. Hope to get you back. Hope to show just how much you mean to him, that you are his treasure. He let out a soft chuckle, fighting the urge to let his fingers slip over your knuckles. He knew it was too soon.

“You were wise in the meeting today.” He said earnestly, looking at you with nothing but sincerity as he watched a blush form on your face, as you turned away from him. Avoiding his intense stare.

“It was just common sense.” You shrug, trying to not seem flattered. “I am at the meetings for a reason.”

“Well…it was still impressive. Was your mate as impressed?” The subject of Va’tep left a sour taste in his mouth and a sour look on your face.

“Please do not speak of him.” You say defeated. Va’tep was a sore reminder in your mind of how you were nothing but a trophy to your parents. A woman to marry off to gain rank.

You were lucky enough to be fated with Neteyam. But it all crumbled when he left. Everything did. Like an earthquake that broke the foundation of every single building in your soul.

Neteyam gave a curious hum, nodding. “Why not?”

“Neteyam. Stop.” He freezes at the tone of your voice, his mind begging that he did not mess up the harmonious moment you were both sharing together.

“W-What?”

“Neteyam…please have mercy on my heart.” You sucked in a sharp breath as you looked into Neteyams watery eyes. “Please.”

He frowned at your plead. “Have mercy on yourself… please… please have mercy on me. And I will never hurt your heart again.” Neteyam gasps after he talked, his sentence being so vulnerable it took the breath out of him.

“I can’t do this…Neteyam you know I can’t” And oh how you wanted to run away with him. To escape your dull life with Va’tep and be able to freely be who you were. To find yourself once again. But it was all too much, his absence took your hope. But he was adamant on giving it back.

“…We can… trust me. Please we can start over… I know. I know I have hurt you, I have scarred your heart. But on the great mother’s name, I will never leave you again… you were my everything and still are. Please don’t think for second I ever stopped loving you.”

The tears started running down your cheeks, but you barely noticed as you stared into the ripples of the water. His words seeping into your skin like a tender kiss.

“Neteyam I’m afraid.” It was barely a whisper. A soft confession that made your lips quivered. “I’m afraid of losing you and myself again.” Neteyam frowned, his brows furrowed as he took his rough fingers to turn your face towards him. His thumb wiping the tears off delicately.

“you have every right to be afraid… but please let me prove to you… that its okay to let go of your fears. Let me... please.”

And in that moment it was as if a switch flipped in you. Every worry washing away as you felt his warmth once again. The years of built up wishes and cravings for him were finally met. As his gaze melted into you, a sad smile across his face as he held onto you tenderly. Every ounce of love pouring into you.

“…please show me how to let go…”

thankyou so much for reading my lovelies!! reblogs + replies extra appreciated!!

series taglist (closed): @notsaelty @mommyneytiri @hannabanana-09 @gloryavila @peachinsominac @jaidalise @neqeyam @hello222sthings @tsuteysyawntu @neyetams @yhern05 @emjeez @adaiasafira @kiri-tuk @yaya6765 @biscuitbeater15 @iwannahaveaprettyaesthetic @plooloo @savvysscandles @dilucslilmeowmeow @69cocktimusprime @newjeansbonnie @chatoicboy @pinkpantheris @plzfeedmebread @afro-hispwriter @lollife1617 @goddesslilithmoriarty @cinetrix @grierpilots @melsunshine @valentineheartzz @tsveria @mikeyswifie @junnniiieee07 @wifeyofeveryone @baebinana @thatonegirlwiththebeanie367 @neteyamssbaby @taleiak @cheyehc @shoyos-sugarbaby @be3flow3r

everything taglist: @8resa @ilovejakesullysdick @neteyamsblog @live-laugh-neteyam @reyalvr @trashfox @darkacademictrash @scntfrhs @dreamyescapesfromreality @fanboyluvr @neteyamzmate @neteyamyawne @neteyamssbaby @oceanstar19 @sharkybabe9 @laylasbunbunny @s-surreality

[ramonag-if]

The public-access demo has been updated to include Chapter Four!

Play the game HERE. Please RESTART the game as old saves will not work.

New to this update:

Edited version of Part One - around 20K words of extra content in Part One;

Chapter Four;

Dealing with the aftermath of Virion's arrival;

Making plans to secure your safety;

Saying goodbye to your family;

Boarding a ship;

Dealing with conflict;

More conflict?;

Spending time with your chosen RO or friend;

Lock in your romance with Prince Irus;

Smooch your chosen RO;

Discover the Nomad Tribe;

Escape a sinking ship;

Reunite with your old friends.

Chapter Four Word Count: 46 909 words. Total Word Count: 246 442 words.

Other things of note:

New, fancy chapter header font and accompanying adornments;

Removed the passive/aggressive stat;

The game will be extended to twelve chapters - instead of three parts, there will now be four parts of three chapters each;

There is an apk version of the game available for android users;

Chapter Four is very bare bones at the moment. I will be going back to add extra content when I start edits.

Thank you for being so patient and I hope you enjoy the game!

Remember to report bugs to me via the bug form in the game or you can report them to me here on Tumblr.

[chakotaybodypillow]

Topics for my Chakotay research!! :D

Before I fully dive into everything I have about Chakotay I want to create and share my sort of headers or what I plan to discuss so yall have an idea of what I’ll be discussing the following weeks :D I may or may not follow this to a tee. I have tried over the years to create a document organizing my thoughts. But there is always so much to consider and it's forever changing. Especially now his background region is specified.

If there is anything in here that is not addressed that you would like me to cover, please let me know! I'll let you know whether or not its something included deeper in the text or if its something I've not yet considered. If that's the case my dms are open and we can discuss it :)

The Al-lore of Chakotay

1: Self Introduction

-How Chakotay made me consider “self” and “others” in the real world and in media.

2: Prodigy and the Nicarao

-The research and the why -The Greater Nicoya -The petroglyphs -Further thoughts and questions

3: The wrongdoings of Chakotay

-Negative stereotypes -Inaccurate cultural portrayals -intro to fixing this within canon? (statement or kinda thesis idk)

4: My past research for a “tribe”

-The research and the why -The Maya -The Lancandon -Q’eqchi

5: Considering the cards we were dealt

-The issue with Trebus -A realistic look at Trebus -Trebus within the Star Trek realm -Tying together the loose ends (how it works for his story/issues in community)

6: Considering the cards we were dealt part 2

-Chakotay's identity as told (issues with his “identity”/the Ladino) -The issues with the destruction of Trebus -Posing some questions (futurism for poc) -Further and final thoughts on fixing him within canon (chronological issues)

7: Exploring Chakotay 1 (Important themes to potentially explore)

-Chakotay's story and immigration -Chakotay's story and “Nepantla” -Chakotay's story and exploring self identity -Chakotay's story and generational trauma

8: Exploring Chakotay 2

-Chakotay through the eyes of the creators and actor

9: Final thoughts!!

-readings (completed/planned/currently reading)

PART 2: Headcanons for background story!!

1: From canon to beta-canon to headcanon (separating and combining the 3)

-the definitions and the how they work  -personal thoughts on how it works  

2: Character Bible

-super basic info on almost all characters

3: Life on Trebus

-Explanation on why I stay vague -Friends/family -Complications within these circles

4: The Academy

-Deeper intro to characters -1st year -2nd year -3rd year -4th year

5: 1st command (Uss Gettysburg)

-Deeper intro to characters -basic info

6: 2nd command (Uss Vico)

-Deeper intro to characters -basic info (segway to side mission)

7: 2nd command part 2 (the trip back home)

-catching up with characters -basic info 

8: 2nd command part 3

-um.. Kinda fuzzy here but intro to my plans for his return from leave

9: 3rd command (“shore” duty/admin at the academy)

-catching up/intro for characters -basic info

10: 4th/5th duty assignments

-yeah this is a bit fuzzy too but i’ll explain ok  -basic info

11: 6th command (Uss Merrimac)

-don't hate but kinda fuzzy too :( BUT I KNOW THE GENERAL DIRECTION OF ALL OF THESE :(

-basic info

12: The beginning to the maquis

-again…don't hate, but i have important ideas for characters lol

I know this makes me look INSANE but this has been something I’ve thought about for a very long time, maybe like 15 years :/ Its been through a lot in my head and on paper but through my art i’ve been able to generate ideas and a direction i want his character to go. I will state this probably a million times more as I type out my ideas, but the headcanons I include, i dont expect that it will align with everyones ideas and speculations with his story and i dont expect everyone to agree with my opinions. We all view chakotay differently and i'm perfectly ok with that. I do this to give others a different perspective on chakotay and his potential. To show that he is interesting. Also to maybe provide anyone with a more “thorough” background story and development for him. Also for any artist or fanfiction authors out there that want to include any of my work in their own, please feel free!! This is for everyone! Its the reason i do it :D anyways i hope i can share all of these thoughts in full before school starts but idk. Some may come in different formats like videos or art so stay tuned!

I will do my best to link my sources as I post but for now here are just a few videos to watch when considering Chakotay and his ethnicity:

this one is a animated retelling of the Maya creation story from the Popol Vuh : ) this ones a fun watch :D

[quillthrillswriting]

i'm writing in jealous aang AND a sparring scene in the upcoming ch of "the teenager in the iceberg"- y'all kataang stans are eating GOOOOODDD 🤭

in order to placate you lovelies, enjoy a couple short & sweet excerpts!!!

also, i love the way that tiny aang in the header looks like he's desperately trying to seperate jet and katara 😭🤍

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

Sokka rose, crossing his arms as his expression shifted to anger. “The traps are Fire Nation. You can tell from the metalwork- no other tribes can achieve seams this flawless without the aid of a Firebender that can bend blue flame.”

Aang’s nose wrinkled as he gently landed next to Katara. “What do the firebenders want with these forest animals?”

“We won’t be sticking around long enough to find out.” Sokka said decisively as the three began to walk back to where they’d left Appa. “As the leader, I say we get walking AQAP.”

Katara raised an eyebrow. “AQAP?”

“It means As Quickly As Possible.” Sokka recited the acronym as if it was obvious. “It’s a more efficient method of communication. I call them ‘short-word-quick-talkers.’ Trust me, they’re gonna be very popular.”

Katara and Aang side-eyed one another sceptically before falling into step behind Sokka. 

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

Katara bent a stream of water from the bottle strapped to her hip, then carefully sent a water-whip straight for their fire, silently proud at how much her late-night practice sessions had allowed her to improve. “Who says you’re qualified to be the boss, all of a sudden?”

“I’m not the boss, I’m the leader.”

Katara scoffed incredulously. “You’re the leader?”

“Naturally.” Sokka puffed out his chest like a peacock pigeon. “I’m the oldest.”

Aang raised an eyebrow, grinning teasingly. “Sokka, I’ve been around for over a century. I have training robes that are older than you.”

Sokka deflated slightly, his shoulders slouching before he managed a retort. “Well, I’m wiser, then. And I have instincts.”

“Ooh, instincts.” Katara wiggled her fingers at him, her voice filled with fake awe. “Please, oh wise leader, share with us your wisdom.”

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

“Down you go,” Jet grinned, self-satisfied and authoritative in his stance. Katara beamed back, her lips parted in an amazed expression, while Aang and Sokka’s features quickly settled into irritation. Before long, an archer and a few other kids dropped from the trees surrounding them, and both Aang and Katara jumped into the fray in response alongside the mismatched gang of weapon-slinging kids. Sokka joined in, his irritation visibly rising as Jet took down each soldier before Sokka could even get close to being in range.

“You snooze you loose, man,” Jet shrugged, his hooks snagging on a man who had been about to grab Katara. “Apologise to the lady.” He smirked, then kicked the man hard, dropping him to the side.

“I had her,” Aang grumbled under his breath, occupied with bending currents of wind to sweep soldiers out of the clearing. Katara furrowed her brow at Aang’s irritation, but decided to note it as something to ask about later. Finally, the remaining soldiers scampered out of the clearing in retreat, their shouts and yelps echoing through the forest. Katara still couldn’t take her eyes off of Jet. He sauntered over to her, a roguish grin on his face as he spoke.

“Hey.” He tossed his hair as he said it, his grin directed entirely at her now, and Katara felt a soft blush spread across her cheeks as she looked up at him. She broke her gaze only to check that Aang and Sokka were okay, and as she looked across the field to Aang…

Was she imagining it, or was his jaw clenching? Was she imagining it, or was his normally approachable expression shifting into a deadpan stare?

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

His gaze flicked from Jet to Katara, to the brush brushing her cheeks, the soft smile of her full lips. He was hit by the thought that he wanted to be there, next to her, in Jet’s place.

What was it about Katara that made Aang feel as though he could only breathe when she was around? 

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

Katara was too caught up in her Jet-related nerves to notice the way that Aang’s breathing was coming more quickly, that his fists were quickly clenching and unclenching. She walked towards Aang, who was joined by Sokka, only for Aang’s eyes to flit away every time they met hers. She reached out an arm reflexively, her hand lightly brushing Aang’s bicep as her brow furrowed in concern.

“Are you alright?”

His eyes flashed with something she couldn’t quite read, and his jaw clenched before he spoke. “I’m sorry, Katara, I just… I need a minute. My judgement is…impaired, right now."

⁎⁺˳ ✧༚ ˎˊ˗ ♡ ˗ˏˋയ ✩

He hesitated a moment before continuing. “Would you… would you care to join me for sparring practice, tomorrow morning? Might help you feel a bit safer next time you need to face off against Fire Nation swine.”

Katara smiled back. “I’d like that.” Jet continued to regale her with stories of all he and his fighters had accomplished as of late, but Katara found herself distracted, her gaze wandering over his shoulder every now and then.

It was not lost on her that Aang’s light had stayed on and his curtains drawn until Jet had returned her to her room for the night.

♥ if you want to stick around for this ch to drop, feel free to head over to the work here! ->

[frozenjokes]

Hermitdragons Masterpost (Wings of Fire x Hermitcraft/Third Life AU)

Grainshifter (Grian) was born to the Nightwings under one full moon, giving him the power to read minds. However, as fortold by Nightwing seers, he also possesses animus magic, a power that the Nightwings will use to bring their tribe into greater glory, becoming Watchers that feed off the strong emotions of the other dragon species, particularly fear. When Grainshifter attends Jade Mountain Academy in disguise as a Skywing called Grian, the Watchers take notes, and years later they surprise him with his very own death game featuring all his friends.

hello hello! this fic is on hiatus, and while I would like to finish it one day, it is my first foray into fic writing basically ever, and my writing has improved dramatically since a year ago when I started to write this. It’s been a while since I’ve reread this, but I have been told it’s good! lol. However! There’s still a lot of content (70k words and SO MUCH ART) so let’s get into it!

Fic One - Ruler of Everything

After Grian betrays Nightwatcher secrets to one of his best friends, Scar, he is punished by the Nightwatchers and placed into a death game with all of his past friends from the academy. However, there are two dragons he does not know; Scott, a Seawing who seems mostly normal, and Martyn, a dragon whose mind he can not read at all. Whose mind no one can read. Whose body can not be manipulated by animus magic. Soon, it is clear that Grian is not the only dragon here that is being punished.

Fic Two - Mechanical Hands (this fic does not exist but in theory it would after the first)

Grian comes to terms with his relationship with the Nightwatchers, finally realizing and accepting that they do not love him, and only want to use him. He teams up with Martyn in a shared goal of destroying animus magic, but a massive problem still stands; they’re both still stuck in these death games. And their friends are still under the Nightwatchers’ magical control. As the games go on, things are starting to feel hopeless, but revealing the secret of Martyn’s immunity to animus magic that he has so desperately tried to keep might just be the solution these trapped dragons need to escape.

Beyond these summaries, I’m going to try and keep these story explanations brief, however, if you’re interested is All Of The Art + commentary + more story explored through the art, then you can keep reading under the cut :) also just as a warning there is a lot of undetailed cartoon blood below

Designs

before writing, these were my first pass of most of the designs in the series! As you can probably tell from the references of the main three characters at the top, Scar, Grian, and even Martyn have changed quite a bit, and if I ever return to this series, other designs will probably change as well. Except Joel and Bdubs. Those are peak. The biggest change from these designs, is that Jimmy is not actually a dragon in this fic!(which is why I included the third picture with him, Scott, and Grian) He is super human, and he dies first for A REASON. He just looks the way canon Jimmy does, minus the wings.

Full Pieces

I made two fully rendered pieces for this fic. To the left is a scene from the academy where Pearl, Ren, and BigB are play fighting in the mountains while Grian and Scar watch. Grian is very uptight in the academy, struggling socially, and his friends, painfully aware Grian comes from a bad home situation and possibly raised in a cult, are trying to help him relax and have a nice time in school while he has the chance.

On the right is a scene from far into the death game, where Scar is overtaken by the magic of his red life, and is threatening to force Grian to kill all three Dogwarts dragons, and at the same time, blowing himself up in the process. The dragon on the left is Skizz and I hate his design, however the little tie thing is hilarious.

Chapter Headers

I made a ton of headers for the chapters of this fic, though most of them are broken on ao3 as far as I’m aware. However, you can see them here!

dragons featured in order of appearance: Scar, Pearl, BigB, Grian, Martyn, Scott, Jimmy, Ren. This isn’t actually every header but I’m going to run out of images and these cover most of them. The ones I left out aren’t anything special.

Mini Comics + Misc Art

I have literally run out of image slots. But that’s okay (most of the stuff was covered, but if you want to scroll through the hermitdragons tag then feel free). Hope you enjoyed regardless! This series is still very close to my heart, and even though I kind of lost touch with it, it’s something I still love dearly. Thanks for reading :)

[2boldlyqueer]

Hi, you reblogged a scam from fullbarbarianblaze, who is promoting a donation scam. They have had this scam running for a very long time, and this link leads to a post with the trail of all the usernames they've used to run this scam, starting with their header name, vero-og. https://www.tumblr.com/kyra45/740721061635768321?source=share

It has been going on for months, meaning that their story of constantly needing "just $370" for insulin is dishonest. Their PayPal name is "Sophia Magubo" which is not a Native American name, but an East African one. (This PayPal account has also been consistent through all of these blogs they've held.) Since they apparently live in the U.S., they should know by now that the price of insulin was capped at $35/pen, meaning that even if they were unable to buy a single unit, a full box of pens (3) would cost $105 plus tax.

Their insulin reading photo shows a 592, which could not last for months on end. Typically a reading of 592 is severe and would warrant a hospital visit if they were out of insulin. It could lead to a coma or death, not waiting idly by for days, hoping for tumblr users to donate to your PayPal.

Please, before interacting with a donation request, check their blog. Do searches of the text username through the tumblr search engine or reverse image search their photos, as some users have compiled scam lists. (e.g. kyra45, anonthescambuster, azalea-alter) Many donation requests are honest, but there are plenty of repeat scammers who are taking advantage of people's sympathy and generosity.

If you are interested in supporting a family whose fundraiser has been through a vetting process and is in danger of being killed in Gaza, please replace your post from fullbarbarianblaze with a post supporting @/nesmamomen. If you have any questions about how to determine the legitimacy of a donation ask, feel free to contact me through DMs or askbox.

While it does appear that this person is scamming people, I have some issues with this ask, to be honest. You have good intentions, which is why I'm responding to let you know about these concerns, instead of just ignoring it like I initially planned to.

Context: I am a white US American with type 1 diabetes, and my response is based only on how things are in the US. A lot of my diabetes facts aren't sourced because they're things I learned from my doctors, or in my time doing advocacy and educational outreach with the American Diabetes Association in high school and 2017-2019.

Firstly, just because someone's PayPal name does not match the ethnicity or nationality you think they are, does not mean they are lying. This is an incredibly slippery slope to start on. Interracial and intercultural marriages exist, and are quite common in the US.

This is especially true of Native American people, who face a ton of issues around the concept of "blood quantum" and not being counted as Native because of it. I am not Native American myself, so I highly recommend you look into what actual Native Americans have to say on the topic. Here's one place you can start:

ID: embedded link for "Blood Quantum and its role in Native Identity - The Indigenous Foundation" with an old black and white photograph of four Native American men in European style formal suits. /End ID

Highlight from the article for our purposes:

Blood Quantum, as a way to ascribe Native American membership, has dire consequences. Blood Quantum policies are little other than genocidal and will eventually lead to the extinction of indigenous people. For example, if the blood quantum limit is set at ¼ in tribal enrollment, and intermarriage proceeds, natives will eventually be defined out of existence. It is almost as if this erasure was premeditated by the government.

While you and I aren't actively trying to legislate them out of existence, by judging a Native American for having a "not Native" name, you are perpetuating the idea of what a Native American is or is not, and that by marrying and having a child with someone of a different culture, that child is automatically not Native enough.

Secondly, the information and assumptions you include about diabetes are not accurate. You say the reading they show is too high to last for months on end. It is possible to be that high for many weeks and sometimes even months. Typically it's before diagnosis, and it will lead to miserable symptoms and long-term complications, but it's not unheard of.

They also never claim to be in the 500s for months. As far as I can tell, that idea is coming from the same image with the same number being used for multiple campaigns. While I can understand you being reasonably skeptical of this, I could also fully see a miserable diabetic who isn't great with tech thinking they could just use the same picture.

One of the things that happens when your blood sugar is too high is that your brain literally doesn't work right. You aren't getting enough glucose into the cells that need them because it's all stuck in your blood, which causes irritability, trouble focusing, fatigue, confusion, and other mood changes. Keep this in mind whenever you say that this person "should" know something about diabetes, or that they would certainly be going to the hospital with a blood sugar that high.

Personally, the one time I had to go to the hospital for a high blood sugar, four people had to talk me into it, and I was told later by my family that I begged the doctors in the Cardiac Care Unit to let me go home because I could treat it myself (I was in the CCU because my blood sugar was high enough that my heart was in danger of failing, and I was told afterwards what happened because my brain wasn't functioning enough to form memories). I also tried to decline an ambulance when my blood sugar was severely low, as I knew in my addled state that my insurance wouldn't cover the bill and that I didn't have $2000 to spare.

Regarding the price of insulin, I live in a state with very robust Medicaid that I'm on, and I have issues at least twice a year with my insulin supply. Recently, I had to get a friend to give me a vial of hers to get me to my refill day, as I ran out two days before my insurance would let me get it, and it would have been almost $100 to fill it early.

Let's take a look at GoodRx to see the best prices possible in a less kind state to live in, like Texas. The amount of insulin required per month varies wildly depending on person, but Native Americans tend to have insulin resistance, so I'll go with 4 vials, as I'm highly insulin resistant and use 6-7 vials a month.

ID: screenshot from GoodRx of prices for 4 (10ml) vials of insulin lispro 100 units/ml in Austin, TX (73301). Prices are: Walgreens $51; Walmart $114.21; CVS Pharmacy $93.50; HEB Grocery $101.68; Community, a Walgreens Pharmacy $51; Costco $114.40 with Special offers available; Target (CVS) $93.50; Randall's $104.52 with Special offers; Walmart Neighborhood Market $114.21 /End ID

Indeed, it's not $370 like the person was requesting, but it's potentially more than you suggested. And it often doesn't make sense to buy one vial when you need more in a month, as it is more expensive.

ID: screenshot from GoodRx of price of 1 (10ml) vial of insulin lispro 100 units/ml in Austin, TX (73301) from Walgreens, priced at $19.50. /End ID

They also do not specify which insulin they need. If this person is not on an insulin pump (highly likely with the level of care Native Americans tend to get, which I will get into shortly) they most certainly need more than one kind of insulin. The most common combo of insulins these days is insulin aspart or lispro (fast-acting insulins) and insulin glargine (AKA Lantus, a long-acting "basal" insulin). It's possible to be allergic to any of these (I am allergic to glargine) and you can get a different kind, but it takes a major fight with your insurance if you have one, or a higher price if you don't.)

Right now, Lantus is so kind as to have a major coupon available that brings the price of their insulin down to the Medicare cap of $35 for everyone (because the cap you mention is only for Medicare recipients, though it has had rippling effects across all levels and kinds of insurance.)

ID: screenshot from GoodRx of prices for Lantus (1 carton (5 solostar pens) 3ml) in Austin, TX (73301). Prices are: Walgreens $35; Walmart $35; HEB Grocery $35; and CVS Pharmacy $35, all marked as Exclusive discount. On the Walgreens line is the text "$518 retail Save 93%" with the price crossed out. /EndID

Notice that teeny grey writing there with the retail price? $518 for a month of Lantus! A shitty pharmacy could absolutely get away with charging up to that price, without letting their customers know about the discounts available.

I mentioned that I'm allergic to Lantus. Last year, I ended up buying a month worth of the version I can tolerate (Tresiba/insulin degludec if you're curious) out of pocket to have as a backup. I paid about $80 for it, which tracks in Texas as well, though it could be double or worse depending on the pharmacy you can use:

ID: screenshot from GoodRx of prices for insulin degludec (1 carton (five 3ml flextouch pen…) in Austin, TX (73301). Prices are: Walgreens $84.92; CVS Pharmacy $160.34; Randall's $183.09 with Special offers; HEB Grocery $184.34; Walmart $189.82; and Costco $200.46 with Special Offers /EndID

Given all that, this person could easily have to pay $370/month if they have bad/no insurance, a shitty pharmacy, and don't have a doctor that will help them get the least expensive options. Not everyone knows about GoodRx and other ways to save on medications.

In fact, my biggest issue throughout your ask is that you have multiple statements on what this person "should" know about our healthcare system or diabetes in general. This is, to be frank, a very privileged view of health education in our country, especially for Native Americans with any concerns.

ID: A Native woman in casual modern clothing looks into the camera neutrally, posing in an office /End ID

Highlight from that article for our purposes:

Indian Health Service, the federal agency responsible for providing health care to federally recognized tribes, is chronically underfunded and doesn’t administer specialty care. So, depending on where one lives on the reservation, a person may have to travel hours for things like cancer treatment, behavioral health services or even to deliver a baby. 

You know what requires specialty care? Diabetes! Now, technically speaking, you can get diabetes care through a primary care doctor. That said, every single primary care doctor I've ever had has deferred to me as the expert in my diabetes, as I have significantly more training on it from my specialist care than my primary care doctor does from their schooling.

What does proper diabetes education look like? When I was diagnosed, I spent a week in the hospital learning how to manage. Then, I started seeing a diabetes endocrinologist (endo), a certified diabetes educator (CDE), and a diabetes ophthalmologist, with the endo and CDE being available via phone and email 24/7 (with a response time typically under 24 hr). (Also available at my kick-ass diabetes center are diabetes specific social workers and art therapy, which I only don't use because I have a therapist I love.)

From my diagnosis in 2007 up until the pandemic, I saw at least one of these specialists every 3 months. On top of that, I had access to classes outside of these appointments where I could go learn about a specific diabetes concern with a bunch of other diabetics (for example, I took a 3 hour class entirely dedicated to how to drink safely with diabetes!) Frankly, a lot of these appointments are dedicated to repetition of important things, because you have to learn so much to manage your health that it's impossible to remember everything, especially if you've only heard it once when you were still processing the diagnosis in the first place.

Imagine having to do all of this, but needing to drive over 50 miles each way, when you're already poor and struggling to survive (an assumption we can make about a Native American begging for help paying for medication online, especially considering the higher rates of poverty they face.

All minorities across the US tend to be left behind in diabetes education and support, and while there are many groups working to help, they aren't able to get to everyone. (Intense irony, I tried to access the CDC's Native Diabetes Wellness Program during this search, and initially got sent around multiple dead links! Even when you try to access the info it's not always there! Plus, it's type 2 specific, which is a whole other rabbit hole I'm not going down right now other than to say it can be hard to find type 1 specific info and they are very different diseases.)

All of this to say, while there are legitimate reasons to believe that user is a scammer, many of the reasons you included in your ask are not, and are instead based on anti-Native American ideas and medical misinformation. This quite honestly makes me less inclined to believe you, and it weakens your argument. All that was necessary was saying that the same exact paypal, story, and image have been used across multiple accounts (ideally with a link to proof, like another user who sent an ask about the same person did.)

[fictionalred]

Orange using a stereotypical image of native americans as the header image for their forum "Tribe" ⊙﹏⊙

[endversewinchester]

The Bad Batch 2x06: Tribes headers (3/3). Like/Reblog if you take any!

[estrelinha-s]

★. . tribe layouts 𖹭

☆. . like or reblog if you like, save or use! hey, don't republish without  credits!!

[tickledpink31]

A thought about Princess Yue from the Live Action AtLA

So, I did watch all 8 episodes of Netflix's Avatar just to give it a fair chance. I went in thinking that this is obviously not going to be as good as the original, and I thought it was okay. There are things I that liked and things that I didn't. At least I was feeling some excitement as opposed to the emotionless drag that was the live action movie. At least I get to shamelessly eat up all that Zutara scarfgate content.

But there was this thing that was bothering me in the back of my mind. It's gotten to the point where I actually jotted down notes before my shift at work started, as if I'm writing an essay for school and I don't want to lose my ideas because of my squirrel brain. You've read the header, it's about our favourite Moon Princess and her relation to the patriarchal system of the Northern Water Tribe.

We all love to complain about how Sokka's sexist to upcoming feminist character arc was taken away, and I do too, but I'd like to complain about the inconsistencies of the worldbuilding in this post.

In episode 7, we get this scene:

And in the very next scene we get this:

And I thought, "Huh, something's not right here."

I don't know about you, but a culturally sexist tribe wouldn't allow a woman to do something like that, at least not without her fighting for that right. You might say that, "Oh, but Hahn said breaking off the engagement is her prerogative. She's a princess."

I say nay. If she could do that in the original cartoon, then why was she so moved to tears after hearing about Kanna and Pakku's arranged marriage.

It's never explicitly said, but something tells me that Yue wouldn't have been allowed to reject Hahn's proposal even if she wanted to. It won't matter if she's in higher a position than Hahn. She's a woman and that's that.

Yue breaking off her engagement in the live action doesn't feel like a progressive move, but a conflicting part of the worldbuilding. We end up losing the tragedy of Yue's role as a woman and how that arc pairs well with Katara going toe-to-toe with the tribe's chauvinistic waterbending traditions. The Water Tribe's misogyny is not just about how women aren't allowed in combat, it's about the little things too. It's about how decisions are made for women by men, how women are told to know their place, how they don't have a say in who they marry, and how even men are made to feel emasculated if they stray too far from the "ideal" man's customs.

I do have a way to fix this, though. You want a Yue fighting for her rights? Here are some suggestions:

I love the original Yue the way she is. We love a soft-spoken and compassionate princess, but it's fine if the live action wants to give her a sprinkle of rebellion, just a sprinkle. Maybe you could SHOW Yue tirelessly fighting tooth and nail to break off her engagement.

You can characterize Hahn in the same way as the original—an egotistical warrior. The arrangement ended up forcing Yue's hand, so she decided that she won't have much to lose if she took a stand for herself.

Maybe because of her willingness to break traditional customs, the elders of the tribe are beginning to show Yue less and less respect than they used to.

Yue's defiance is a slow burn arc. Perhaps she and Katara bond even more and Katara's natural fury and rebelliousness rubs off on Yue, so she decides to stick it to Hahn.

Man, I cannot believe I wrote all this. If only I was this passionate while writing essays in high school.

[fishrpg]

Coming This October On FishRPG...

Somewhat surprisingly, the dice have demanded that I revisit the western aesthetic after only a month. Though instead of a weird west, I'm going to be focusing on a more historical western without magic. And I'm also going to be switching things up and focusing on fleshing out pieces of a singular fictional settlement instead of doing a broader area of larger areas. After much consultation with the dice, let me introduce you to

The Town of Bowman

Bowman is a frontier town in southern Oregon, right on the border with California. It was founded in 1852 back when the area was still the Oregon Territory. It was founded as hub for emigrants who were leaving Oregon and flocking to the Applegate Trail during the California Gold Rush.

Geographically, the town is on the Klamath River, just southwest of where Altamont would be located a few years later. The town would eventually fail and its population would relocate to Altamont and Klamath Falls, though this didn't happen until the turn of the 20th century. For setting purposes, the version of Bowman I'm looking at is how it would have looked during 1872-1873. During this specific time frame, Bowman is located in Wasco county, though that specific area will be reassigned as Lake County in 1874 and eventually turn into Klamath County in 1882.

Bowman's economy is at an inflection point during this period; its primary industry has been harvesting timber from ponderosa pines, but the clear cut areas have now given way to a thriving cattle ranching community. Exceptionally harsh winters in 1879 and 1889 would eventually destroy cattle operations, hastening the town's decline.

Rail activity in the area predates the Transcontinental Railroad. Currently the town is served by a branch line that connects to the larger Oregon and California (O&C) Railroad. The branch line runs east-west, bisecting the town.

To the north of Bowman is the Klamath Indian Reservation, established in 1864. The Reservation is home to three tribes: Klamath, Modoc, and the Yahooskin Band of Northern Paiute Indians. Unfortunately, the town's location puts it the crossfire of a conflict known as the Modoc War that is currently ongoing.

------------

Header image taken from the Oregon Encyclopedia, and depicts George Nurse's home in Linkville, which would eventually become Klamath Falls.

[missing-sock-misto]

For the writing ask game:

12, 20, 35, 76

12. Do you ever have trouble focusing on writing? how do you get around that?

Oh my god, so many problems, I am very ADHD XD However: I’ve learned that non-linear writing works really well for me. I will jump around from scene to scene based on what interests me or what pops in my head. I like writing this way because:

It allows for me to get to the fun stuff first, which for my dopamine deficient brain, gives me energy to continue working on the story.

If I get writer’s block, I can skip ahead to a different scene, and let the other scene marinate for a few weeks. Often, while I’m working on OTHER scenes, I figure out something to continue the plot forward earlier on.

It forces me to think about the story in a deeper way, because I need to keep track of the plot and the plot elements way more. Which, WOULD be exhausting, but by giving them scenes names, and make those headers, it turns into a functional outline.

If later something doesn't work out and I have to cut it, at least I have the scene out of my head. I can always recycle it, and at least I'm not building on bad foundations.

It means I'm constantly having to reread and edit my stuff, as I'm trying to remind myself what happens, so my editing can happen gradually through out the process.

I also will often have multiple creative projects in different states; various art wips, writing wips, long projects, short projects, will-not-be-published- projects etc. So I work with my moods. If I feel like drawing for two weeks, I do that. And if I want to write for a week, I do that. But I work WITH my moods. It means I approach the hobby in a pretty healthy and sustainable manner, even if it means my output is not as fast. But no point being fast if I burn myself out!

20. what is your favorite trope to write?

Whump, hurt and comfort. :3

35. tell us about a character who’s very different than you who you love a whole lot

Demeter. I write her as very traditionally feminine; she’s kind, loving, emotionally intelligent, and a hopeless romantic. She wants to be a mom, and loves being one. As someone who ID’s as a girl (though, more by default than any connection to my gender) but has never had any interest in children, romance, and has zero patience or nurturing instincts etc, it’s a very interesting headspace to be in. But it’s also fun to explore her strengths and her courage. I love that in the musical, despite being TERRIFIED of Macavity, she jumps on him to warn the Tribe of the danger. It’s such an amazing moment for her, and I try to keep that courage she has in my writing. She will do the right thing and protect those she loves, even if she’s scared.

76. what is one essential thing to remember when writing a villain? 

In my opinion- how do they relate to and reflect your protagonists? I love writing Macavity, because he has such a personal relationship with so many characters, and he’s a foil to so many:

Misto- with the themes of magic, and by extension, power.

Tugger- I like making Mac a dark reflection of Tugger. They both are charming, charismatic, magnetic, passionate, clever, (hot), confident, and more that a bit self-centered. But Mac lacks the kindness, loyalty and love that Tugger has. They’re also both emotionally volatile, but how they manage their outbursts is very different. Tugger gets angry because he’s pissed, Mac will use his anger to intimidate and incite fear.

Munkustrap- Leadership and Love. I love exploring Munk and Mac's relationship with Demeter, and likewise Demeter’s relationship with them. How Mac uses Munk’s weaknesses against him when courting Demeter, but how Munk’s ‘weaknesses’ become strengths in the aftermath of Macavity- where before his caution, general amiability and kindness made him “boring”, after Mac, it was exactly what Demeter needed.

Plus, it’s fun giving a moral paragon like Munk so much conflict with his brother, who he SHOULD have loyalty, respect, and love for, but has been hurt so deeply by that it causes him turmoil.

Bombalurina- Mac is also a dark reflection of her, though in a different way to Tugger. It’s like, both Macavity and Bomba are foxes (?), but Mac chooses to get worse where Bomba chooses to get better. 

Old Deuteronomy- again, the leadership, the familiar ties, power, etc. 

He’s just a really fun character to write because I can basically make him a foil with every protagonist I’m interested in writing. I actually had a brief hyperfixation on a different fandom, but it didn't last cause I couldn't get a villain as fun as him!

Thank you for the ask!

[mybeautifulbeautifuleternal]

Your feet kept hitting the metal legs of the man behind as you kicked them around. The thick arm around your throat and the maliciously glowing lightsaber held across your body were the only things keeping your master from attacking. Master Obi-Wan was a brilliant fighter but Maul had him frozen in place with your capture. You knew he wouldn’t risk you — and there was currently no way to get you out of danger before Maul ripped you apart.

It had been a surprise attack on your mission that had caught both of you off guard. It was supposed to just be a simple diplomatic mission — two warring tribes had decided to seek peace but they wanted a third party to officiate it. Master Obi-Wan and you had been chosen to go.

You had aced your diplomat classes in the Temple and you had confided in your Master that was what you wanted to do as a Knight. He had been more than happy to help you in your dreams and had asked the council for a small mission that you could lead. The fact that the two tribes had declared peace for themselves was the deciding decision for assigning you to this specific planet — they might be willing to overlook your small mistakes and your hesitancy because they were willing to look together towards a better future.

And it worked, everything coming together brilliantly. You had felt confident when you woke up on your last morning there, having led the peace talks to a successful conclusion. Then your ship had been attacked as you started to lift-off, Maul Force pulling you from the front of the ship and yelling out for your master.

Aside from holding you in place, the arm around your throat was also restricting your breathing. The panic that was growing within you was keeping you from being able to focus on the conversation that Master Obi-Wan and Maul were having. Their voices were just a soothing buzz in the back of your mind as you slowly began to gasp for breath.

Black was starting to edge into your vision when you heard R2D2’s scream and a small smile started to grow on your lips. Even as you fell into unconsciousness, you felt hope. The Hero Without Fear had arrived and together with The Negotiator, there wasn't anything that they couldn’t do.

@febuwhump

A/N — any blank blogs that follow me are going to be reported then blocked. Pick a different profile pic and get a witty header or something.