#travel fears
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Me when I remember something I said ages ago that was wrong or my values no longer align with
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#my path of self improvement has been less self righteous and personally gainful#and more just. a lot of embarrassment and pain#like i wouldnt change the path i took to get where i am now but i wouldve chosen to travel that path sooner because omg#nothing hits me like the fear that future me will feel the same way about right now me that right now me feels about past tense me
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what if she was an ex borg drone and you dont like her but you're the best mechanical engineer on the ship and you have to work on the maintenance of the remaining - and most crucial - implants on her body and the monthly check ups are always strangely intimate-
what if
#im sooooo embarrassed at the time it took to me to post this. life and college and shit#there was a week i traveled and left my drawing tablet at home. that happened also. but here we are#star trek#star trek voyager#st voyager#seven of nine#b'elanna torres#b7#seven has short hair still and b'elanna has wavy/curly hair bc they deserve it#will ever stop drawing the same two ppl from star trek? dunno#probably#i fear the day it happens bc it will mean i'll go just as much insane but for different reasons#my art
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& Many more to read....
#beauty#skincare#fitness#health#outdoors#beauty tips#wellness#yoga#travel fears#travel#fashion#tech#technology
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DCxDP: Travel Buddy
"I already told you I'm not going to another country! I'm going to New Mexico!" The shout echoes with frustration across the airport. Dick looks up from his phone to where a man is arguing with a woman behind a counter. She has a pinched grimace on her face, an expression only those who have worked in customer service are familiar with.
It's the look of someone who dances on the line of "I don't need to up with this bullshit. I don't need this job" and "Think of your bills, think of your check, stay calm."
There is a long line behind him, where everyone is making faces at the delay.
Dick often preferred to travel with Justice League tech, as nothing beat the speed of instant teleportation, but he needed to have some records of traveling the normal for his civilian identity. It would be suspicious if he was seen worldwide with no signs of how he got there.
It was a necessary evil to have his loveable wanderlust persona that was Dick Grayson-Wayne. He had taken a few aspects of Brucie Wayne but replaced the playboy reputation with a restlessness that couldn't stand being in one place for too long.
Growing up with people constantly pointing out how attractive he was, which would have been fine were it not for the rich old men and women who leered at him through his teen years. He could not stomach being a playboy, allowing those who objectified him to think he enjoyed their attention.
It was easier to be the easily distracted, pretty son who was always away from home instead. It helped that Bruce had plenty of private jets to gift his son for whatever whimsy urge to move hit him. That was why he was in Illinois today.
Dick's jet had needed to stop for some fuel, and like most commercial airlines, they were told that they needed to wait before heading up again. They may have enough money to afford their own planes, but commercial planes have the right of way.
Then a storm was reported at Gotham Airlines, and his pilot told Dick they were grounded until it cleared up. It could be a delay of six hours.
Dick didn't mind, having told his staff to take a break. If it got too bad, he would buy everyone a hotel room to try again tomorrow. His private jet staff seemed stunned by the offer, insisting they could wait to see if it was clear enough to fly in a few hours.
He had decided he wanted to have some crappy airport snacks, as it was part of the experience, and walked around the airport munching on his chocolate donut. He found a little booth selling local coffee, prompting him to find a seat near the welcome counter and scroll through his phone.
He still had three hours to kill, so he considered exploring the area a little. I suggest finding some hotels just in case. There was little in this place. The closest city was Amity Park, but it was only beside the mall and a decent burger joint; there was little to do.
It was one of those small towns that, despite not having many people, was well spread out due to all the open spaces. The people who lived there either raised a family, retired or had bloodlines traced generations back to the town's founding.
"Sir, as I stated before, you need a passport, and you have to pay for an international ticket to go to Mexico," The woman hissed. Some people in line began muttering about how annoying the man was for arguing.
"All I have is my driver's license. I could go home for my passport. That's no issue, but I am not paying for an international ticket to Mexico when I am not going there! I'm staying in the US! New Mexico is a state!" the man shouts, flailing his long black trenchcoat. It makes the black ponytail swing side to side as he leans on the counter. "How do you work in travel and not know that!?"
"What is going on here?" A man demands, stepping beside the gumming woman. Dick can tell he is the manager just by the way his uniform looks different.
"This man is refusing to listen." The counter lady practically spits and is now leaning well over the "I don't need this job" side of the customer service line. Dick finds himself standing up as the manager gets a quick rundown of the problem.
The crowd was getting impatient, even with the two other representatives slowly calling up the next customer. Curious by the outcome, Dick drifts closer, listening to the man explain that he wants to go to New Mexico to study the enormous reports of violent paranormal sightings.
He was apparently visiting all highly haunted states in the US to write a book about the history of the hauntings, but when he was attempting to get his ticket, the woman had been convinced he was leaving the country. Dick watched in real-time as the manager also seemed to think New Mexico was in Mexico because he began to explain the international policy to the fuming man.
They threatened to put him on the no-fly list if he continued causing them trouble. That angered the traveler even more, and he raised his voice and waved his arms as he insisted the location be within the country.
Dick pulls out his phone, typing with one thumb quickly and pulling up a map of the country. He slid right next to the trio, standing at the stranger's left with an easy smile.
"Excuse me, can I have a moment of your time?" He asks
The woman's frustration is now nearing its tipping point, but the manager must have recognized him, for he hastily scrambles to make his expression more pleasant.
"Mr. Grayson-Wayne! Please give me one moment to sort this out. I can help you if that's okay with you. I'm sorry for the delay. Karen, call security to have this man escorted out."
"What!?" Demands the guy as the woman grins.
"With pleasure."
"New Mexico is a US state, " Dick cuts in, displaying his screen. "It's been one since 1912, I'm afraid."
The airline employees are pale as they stare at his phone before the manager pulls it out of his pocket and types rapidly on it. A few seconds later, his already white face goes even whiter.
Dick considers the man next to him, who has a grin starting to bloom on his face. It's a pretty handsome face if he's honest. A dig has him looking away towards his phone.
It's a message from his pilot. It seems the storm was due to Mr. Freeze, and they weren't expecting it to clear for at least four days. He was asking if there was anywhere else Dick wanted to fly to.
"I'm so sorry. I'll bump you up to first class." The manager says to the stranger, who is looking rather smug now. Dick considers his pilot's question before thinking, why not.
He does have an image to uphold, after all.
"Would you like a ride in my private jet? " Dick turns to the man, who blinks at him while cutting off the rambling of the woman and the manger. "I can drop you off wherever you want in New Mexico. Where were you headed?"
"Ugh, I wanted to visit Dawnson Cemetry, " the man stammers. "I-do you really have a private jet?"
"Yeah. Would you like to go with me?"
There is a moment of hesitation before the man grabs his wallet off the counter and nods. "If it's not too much trouble," he responds cautiously.
"It's not. I'm Dick Grayson-Wayne, by the way."
"Danny Fenton."
Dick waves the two employees away, winking at them as they slump in relief that Danny doesn't seem to want to make this into an incident. Likely, he had just been upset they weren't listening.
"Most haunted places in the US, huh?" Dick asks while sending a text to his crew. He gets confirmation that they can head over to the southwest post haste. "Aren't you scared of ghosts?"
Danny gives an odd little smirk. "I haven't been afraid of ghosts since I was fourteen."
Dick stares at his mouth a little too long, swinging his gaze back to his phone when he gets a message from Bruce. His dad had been informed of the flight change and was using the coded message to confirm Dick being the one to change it.
He types out a response, ignoring the fluttering of his heart. If he checks to see what other states are highly haunted as Danny looks around his jet with a fallen jaw, that's only because he has four days to kill.
#dcxdpdabbles#dcxdp crossover#Travel buddy#Part 1#death defying#New Mexico is a state and the haunted capital of the southwest#Guess why Danny is going to places with dangerous ghosts?#Dick's public persona is the rich boy always on the road#You take the boy out of the traveling circus but you can't take he traveling circus out of the boy#That woman and manger fear Danny will sue#Meet Cute at airport
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#anok yai#fear of god#black girl moodboard#black girl aesthetic#black women#black girl luxury#blackgirlmagic#blacktumblr#soft life#black girl magic#black girl hair#melanin#soft moodboard#black love#blackout#black girls travel#braids#summer#block party#black girl#luxury lifestyle#rich black women#educated black women#black women in luxury#natural black women#black women hair#black girl in luxury#black women with braids#afro's#black girls of tumblr
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Look how far I went, for fear of losing you.
#they’re my roman empire#and hell bent isn’t just an episode it’s the breaking point the emotional explosion#It’s where everything gets flipped upside down when it comes to love sacrifice and pushing moral boundaries#It’s the Doctor at his most vulnerable and powerful like at the same time#he’s not just some space traveler anymore he’s a person torn apart by his own contradictions battling his nature his past traumas#his fight with himself with Gallifrey with a world that doesn’t get his pain – it’s a cry of despair straight from his soul#and that cry? It’s all because of her#the Doctor’s ready to go to any extreme step over all the moral lines he used to stand for#It’s about keeping her alive#It’s scary and mesmerizing at the same time#his love isn’t romantic in the normal way it’s more like a raging storm capable of anything to keep the person he loves safe from harm#It’s not a calm harbor it’s a hurricane tearing everything in its path#every move he makes every time he tries to touch her to hold her to protect Clara it’s soaked in this crazy all-consuming love#he’s almost obsessed with it like he’s ready to rewrite reality break every law possible just so she stays alive#and it’s not just about being attached it’s an addiction fueled by the pain of loss and the fear of feeling that pain again#he’s lost and found himself in that pain#doctor who#12th doctor#twelfth doctor#twelve#hell bent#new who#dwgifs#dr who#the doctor#nuwho#clara oswald#whouffaldi#dw#peter capaldi
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To see the whole world.
Where are they going to next?
#observant individuals will see two cameos there ;)#slay the princess#stp#lavdoods_vb#the long quiet#stp princess#stp fanart#slay the princess fanart#slice of life stp#shifting quiet#i personally dont have that drive to travel the world#cuz itll be VERY tiring#and im not very good at adapting to new environments#and theres also the fear of being on very long flights-
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#travelling#ontheroad#roadoflife#escape#alive#peaceful#tranquille#serene#chillout#alternative#lounge#triphop#gratitude#freedom#overcoming fear
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FELLOW TRAVELERS 1x07 “White Nights”
#fellow travelers#matt bomer#jonathan bailey#hawkins fuller#tim laughlin#hawk x tim#tim x hawk#fellowtravelersedit#*#the fear in hawk's eyes as he tries not to laugh dfhsjfds#i love the wide shot with the candles and lights so pretty#something something tim asking hawk to make a promise he know he'll break...
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ending B levi outfits i made a while ago as well, i think he'd turn out working random jobs while traveling across the continent and trying to outrun his past
#fear and hunger#fear and hunger termina#levi jordan#levi funger#my art#also he travels w/ marina it's canon TO ME!!!!!!!!!
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i finished rereading the first four vorkosigan books (+ "the flowers of vashnoi" because ekaterin!!!), and you really have to feel for piotr vorkosigan because what a nightmare life, truly.
imagine you are born just in time for your world to be unified by dorca vorbarra and rediscovered by people from wider galaxy. things are finally looking good, for the first time in 600 years of isolation there is no more feudal infighting, and the promise of galactic medicine and technologies being available lightens everyone's perspectives. sure, your grandpa is called count pierre "le sanguinaire", but who doesn't have terrible relatives?
then you are 15, and suddenly your planet is attacked by the aggressive eugenecist space empire hell-bent on subjugating your people and turning them into disposable material for unethical genetic experiments. you flee into the mountains, away from your family, and create guerrilla forces from locals sworn to your dad, and it's really terrible for a very long time. you have no high-tech weapons and no food, you sleep in a cave in the dead of winter, and the cetagandans try everything (from carpet bombing to chemical weapons) to murder you.
but hey, at least you now have your bff ezar vorbarra, and (from the bff's words on his deathbed) it sounds like you two had so much fun between unimaginable horrors and despair, and it's not surprising, since no one really believes in death after life at 20. then the emperor makes you a general at the tender age of 22. fortunately for him, you & bff make a frighteningly competent dream-team, and the joke's on cetagandans.
then, several years later, you ask the emperor for weapons, because you still sleep on the bare cave floor, there are little resources, and every ghem on the planet is trying to murder you. he offers you the hand of his granddaughter instead, like it's some sort of twisted fairytale, but you grow to love your olivia more than anything, and the tide of war is finally turning, and you allow yourself to entertain the idea of peaceful life, and then...
the space eugenecist empire nukes your hometown, killing your mom, dad, surviving brothers, and two hundred thousand of your people. plus your bff (ezar) gets a radiation doze large enough for it to cause severe cancer thirty years later. great.
but you win! your district is in shambles, your capital is an irradiated crater, your castle is in ruins, but you win! the old dorca dies, and yuri ascends the throne, but politicking is secondary to the fact that you are alive.
yes, you are probably not entirely sane, and you've long forgotten what the peaceful times look like, but you are alive, just under 35, and your entire life is ahead of you. olivia is alive too, and ezar, and you now have three wonderful children, and the extended vorpatril-vorbarra family that hosts regular get-togethers. sure, your mom-in-law is a betan with all sorts of crazy ideas in her head, but she is not pierre vorrutyer. small mercies.
but then the new emperor goes mad, and decides to murder your entire family overnight. your brothers-in-law are gone, one of your sisters-in-law too, and all your nephews and nieces except little padma. but all of this pales in comparison to the facts that olivia is murdered, and that your heir and daughter lay dead beside her.
all you have left of her, of your house, of the family you've lost in vashnoi not a ten years ago, is aral, whom you keep by your side throughout the bloody civil war to put your bff on the throne.
but you win again. you are 43, and ezar vorbarra is now the emperor. you are responsible for the imperium's entire ground forces. you are also responsible for a severely traumatized boy of 13, and the only children you've interacted with without olivia's genle guidance were little messengers of guerilla companies.
what a mess.
#vorkosigan saga#lois mcmaster bujold#piotr vorkosigan#i was also reading /the lives of wonderful people/ books about mikhail vorontsov and alexander benkendorf last month and these two in#their younger years have the exact vibes of piotr and ezar during the first cetagandan war#chase after some poor cossacks on mail duty because you have mistaken them for enimies & you're twenty and long for military glory? yes#fearlessly hang about very dangerous mountains despite the threat of ambush? check#ask your boss to let you travel to YAKUTSK of all places because his inspection of southern siberia is boring and you#want to prove to yourself how cool you are? yes#agree to be someone's second on the duel and then inventively sell it to the emperor? also yes#volunteer for the dangerous expedition to the aegean sea? conquer the unconquerable ottoman fortress? yes and yes#and like..... despite it all they were also competent!#benkendorf ended french occupation of the netherlands in 10 days#and vorontsov was a commander at one of the most dangerous positions during the battle of borodino#during the battle of craonne vorontsov led the infantry and benkendorf the cavalry and together they held their own against napoleon!#but yes general-fieldmarchal count vorontsov the imperial governor of everything between modern moldova and the caspian sea#and cavalry general benkendorf who was the feared head of the gendarmes and before that aide-de-camp of emperor alexander#were also once crazy (and crazely talented) twenty year olds#which is basically what guerilla piotr and ezar are
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You should plan on doing a meet and greet one day!
.
#I think you don't fully realize how far away from everything I live#Finland as a country is pretty remote from most places#and my home town is remote by Finnish standards#I'd actually love to go to a con for at least once but I'm in the middle of nowhere and travelling is expensive time consuming and stressful#and I have both intense social anxiety and fear of crowds so I don't know how that would pan out#but it was a cute thought!#it's nice to think that there's people out there who might see me as someone worth meeting irl#answered#anonymous#relive the lost franklin expedition by coming to see me in the arctic
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i love imagining a cinematic sort of montage of scenes that show the juxtaposition of Viggo's upbringing against the life of the dragon riders; going from a young Viggo being told by his father and grandfather that dragons are witless beasts of vicious nature, to an older Viggo watching the riders share a deep bond with those same creatures.
young Viggo being told by his grandfather that dragons are without mercy, harsh as nature's own hands, power given flesh—to adult Viggo watching a night fury risk its life to save a boy, using its fire not for threat but for warmth, its claws not to maim but to hold, its wings not to attack but to carry.
#dont know if i used the word juxtaposition correctly but you know what i mean!#i just love the imagery of it#young viggo playing maces and talons against his grandfather#listening to the old man telling him stories of his travels and the dragons hes defeated#to him sitting on dragonback himself listening to a boy half his age with twice his wisdom#it gets harder every day to lift a blade to the creature he knows has the capability to understand fear and death#he makes the same 'mistake' hiccup did in the first movie#he looked the beast in the eye and realized it wasnt so different from him#httyd#hiccup haddock#viggo grimborn#race to the edge#how to train your dragon#rtte#hiccup#toothless
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Overcoming My Anxiety: My First Time Traveling Experience
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Men fear silence as they fear solitude, because both give them a glimpse of the terror of life’s nothingness.
-- André Maurois
(Warszawa, Poland)
#solitude#silence#nothingness#andre maurois#travel photography#warszawa#warsaw#poland#quote#tower#humans#fear
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ghost fucking soap so hard and so good he passes out but he utterly panics about it
he thinks he must’ve ignored soap asking to stop; was it pain that made him pass out? how bad could it have been to make him pass out when he’s been shot and kept going? should he bring him to medical? he’ll never touch him again, he’ll never so much as look at him again; he’ll ask for a transfer- fuck that, a dishonourable discharge. there’s no coming back from this
he spirals, guilt chasing hatred chasing despair chasing fear, until soap finally wakes back up
soap's still floating, loose-limbed and buzzing; fucked so thoroughly out of his head that it takes him a while to notice ghost isn't in bed with him anymore. he frowns, lifting a heavy head off the pillow and freezes. ghost's on the other side of the room, curled up tight in the corner as far away from soap as he could get without leaving him alone
(he would've left, would've made sure soap never had to see his face again and be reminded of what he did to him, of the monster he’d let into his bed- but he couldn't just leave him unconscious; what if he didn't wake up, he had to make sure he was safe first even if he'll rightfully hate him forever when he does wake up)
soap's voice when he calls out to him makes him flinch, his head burying deeper in his knees. cold worry chases the bliss from his blood and soap pushes himself up but his shaking arms can't hold his weight
the sound of him collapsing back onto the bed makes ghost rear up, his panic growing and soap's heart breaks at his red rimmed eyes
it takes a long time for soap to coax him back to the bed, countless loops of, "sweetheart, please, come here, what happened? it's okay, everything’s going to be okay.”
(and how ghost’s self-hatred grows hearing soap comforting him; hearing the concern and love in his voice when he doesn’t deserve a drop of it)
it takes even longer for ghost to believe soap when he says that he passed out because he felt so good; that he never asked ghost to stop, never wanted him to stop. that he trusts him more than anything and knows he'd rather die than ever hurt him, especially like that
“you’re not a monster, love,” he promises, soft with conviction and it’s as much a surrender as a relief when he collapses into his lap and lets him hold him close
ghost believes johnny but he still can't bring himself to be intimate with him for a while; that fear still haunting him, but soap doesn't hold it against him, doesn't complain about ghost's perceived "step back" in their relationship
hell, ghost seems to hate it more than he does; he misses being with soap, misses the connection, the closeness they shared, the safety and quiet he found in his embrace, but he's always trusted soap more than he trusts himself
soap doesn't let him be consumed by his fear or worse, sabotage them and turn it into a punishment; doesn't let him even get through the suggestion of switching because he knows how much he hates it and he won’t let him twist something as good and pure as their physical love into something self-harming
instead, he brings them back to the basics, working through the steps to get ghost comfortable with intimacy again, to get him to trust himself again; spends happy months just grinding and exchanging handjobs like when their relationship first started
and it's a happy day for them both when soap finally falls apart on his cock once again, anxiety the farthest thing from ghost's mind when his arms are wrapped so tightly around him, kissing a smile against his lips
#i dont want to know what it says about me but i love traumatic misunderstandings?#thing like thinking the other is sh’ing or has an ed or in this case pushed the other beyond their limits#i think its the knowledge that its not true and the love or trust of the souple will win out above the guilt or fear#even less severe ones like thinking the other is mentally ill when they actually time traveled or can see ghosts or whatever#i just really like misunderstandings that have actual weight to them#tw for ghosts comic backstory#but ghost surviving roba and the hell he put him through only to be terrified of being like him? oh that shit Hits#like ghost knows hes fucked up he knows he has trauma and he knows he likes killing people a little too much#but him being scared of that twisting into him becoming like the people that hurt him? very interesting very painful#and him ever thinking that he did that to /johnny/? it would destroy him#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#ghostsoap#soapghost#ghost cod#simon ghost riley#soap cod#john soap mactavish#we’re a team. ghost team#save post#ghoap#call of duty#cod#cod mw2#cod mwii
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