#trans in the south

[genderqueerpositivity]

CW: gender affirming care bans, surgery, etc

My appointment to hopefully 🤞 start on the process of having a hysterectomy is only 25 days away now and I've been googling this morning trying to figure out if the hospital I'll be seeing a doctor at receives public funding.

You know, trying to figure out what my chances are of being told to fuck off at the door, thanks to our asshole governor and the absolute clown car that is our state legislature.

A hysterectomy is priority to me over top surgery...and maybe even over remaining on testosterone long term, for gender affirming reasons, medical reasons, and childfree reasons.

I don't really care what codes they put on the insurance paperwork. I don't care what pronouns they use for me. I just need for this to happen.

I wish I had pushed for this sooner instead of waiting to feel ready for it.

[lesboyjack]

Nov. 8th, 2024

Times are about to get even tougher, but despite it all, I still love being queer.

Death before detransition.

- Jack

[manicpunk98]

No one talks about trans people in the south. No one talks about our issues.

I have been trying to get to a place where I could afford insurance for my top surgery for about 5 years and now that I've managed to afford it, I'm just finding out South Carolina doesn't require insruances to consider trans healthcare medically necessary. That it's just a cosmetic procedure in their books.

When did this happen? Why is there no news about this? Why doesn't anyone care about us? Who are you actually fighting for if not the most vulnerable of us?

[shartreuse1312]

Phizzi’s mutual aid boundaries~

I DO NOT ACCEPT DIRECT REQUESTS FOR FUNDS, I will always share! I donate what I can when I can and I don’t when I can’t!

I am poor & multiply marginalized myself as well!

I try to only answer&/share everybody ONCE PER DAY as to not drown out anybody else’s needs!

So I beg of you, PLEASE only ask/tag once per day!

Thank you for understanding and respecting this.

Attached ~ MA graphics for my own current needs

[rox-in-the-box]

Hey everyone

I'm asking for some aid as im below the amount of my rent. I need to pay it off before I risk getting evicted and fine for 200 dollars. If anyone is willing to help out

I have currently living in Louisiana for two years, and it's been hard since I moved down here. I can finally get the care that I need for my transition. However, it's a struggle to get a job since I was laid off from my dream job back in 2023. I'm currently working, but it's not enough to keep up with expenses and bills. According to the state, I make too much income to be on Medicaid and SNAP as a single individual. Yet, I'm over here struggling to keep up. I do appreciate anyone who's willing to donate. Hopefully, it gets situationed before the 5th of September.

Message me for PayPal and venmo

Cashapp is $R0xN33dM0ns

[bekandrew]

Free Resource Downloadable

The Further Reading Section of "Operation Lavender," a trans-focused adventure for Trinity Continuum: Aberrant set in the Southern US and written by a Southern trans guy, is up on my Patreon for all members. https://www.patreon.com/posts/operation-108488268

[topsurgerystuff]

Okay I’ve never actually posted my own, brand new post on the internet before so I’m kinda nervous but bear with me. I guess I’ll start by putting all my little links and such. I’m sure most people already know about these but fuck it what do I know.

The GALAP is where I got the therapist who gave me the little letter that tells them I’m trans. It’s got a list of therapists who have agreed to give out free letters that iirc are sorted by state. It’s down as of right now but it says they hope to be back up by April 30th 2024. I live in Texas so there was only one for me but she was real cool, she did the evaluation but made it clear that it was only because she legally had to and that she would give me the letter regardless, it was 100% free and it was over telehealth so I didn’t have to go anywhere.

https://www.thegalap.org/need-a-letter/directory

Folx Health does all kinds of stuff. They do gender affirming care as well as just regular doctor shit and they have guys in every state and they take a lot of insurance but their membership is SO GODDAMN EXPENSIVE. If you’re Jeff FUcking Bezoso well here you go I guess.

https://www.folxhealth.com/

Legacy Health is the same as Folx but much more affordable and only in Texas. Sorry if you don’t live in Texas.

https://www.legacycommunityhealth.org/contact-us/

Trans in the South is a directory of all kinds of trans-affirming health and legal service providers. It also has a guide on how to fund your transition and its got a list of grants you can apply for too. Never noticed that before, might do that shit.

https://southernequality.org/resources/transinthesouth/

Trans Legal Aid of Texas has volunteer attorneys that will help you get and do the paperwork to change all your legal info but you gotta live in Texas sorry sorry.

https://translegalaidtx.com/

Also I don’t have a link for them but Dr. Daniel Freet and Dr. Rachel Goldstein did my top surgery at Memorial Hermann. They did a great job, they were so nice to me, they didn’t question my decision at all and the whole experience start to finish was pretty nice. The wait was forEVER but they are really fucking busy and they’re booked like crazy so. Understandable. Unfortunately, the full cost of my surgery is ~$17,000 and my insurance, who initially said they would cover it, decided they would actually wait until we get the bill before deciding to cover it and since the bill arrived they’ve been dead silent but [screaming in agony] its fine. My incision scars are nice and straight, I have very little dog earing going on and its flattened over time. I’m a little chunky so that’s impressive. It’s only been 5 months and I have full mobility, it only took me about 2 months to get there. My nips are a little ugly but they are intact and they are recognizable as nips. More on that in a later post though. Overall, 10/10, would recommend. End post.

[kirkwallhellmouth]

Regarding the post about changes to what can be prescribed via telehealth, like.

I’m really glad (and also lucky) that I got to have an in-person meeting with my HRT provider when they did a pop-up clinic, because they’re not based in my state and they’re probably THE closest informed consent folks to me. Luckily that was also pre-Covid.

I met a doc at a clinic in my state and I am pretty sure that man does not believe informed consent should be a thing.

Here’s a hint if you’re a medical professional: if you think other providers aren’t worth shit, for fuck’s sake do a better job of hiding your disdain for them from their patients.

Only saw that guy because the law firm doing my gender marker change pro bono works with a judge who’s cool with things as long as the doctor’s letter about “yes, this is a Certified Trans Person who has Done Procedures” comes from a doc in the same county.

[andyinmiddleearth]

One of my friends in my small red town high school was literally the second one. She was so “supportive” until I talked about medically transitioning, and she basically said what person #2 said, and that broke me. Later I found out she was a Trump supporter and had never told me😭

Same goes for a girl I had a crush on that pretended to be okay with my transness but was secretly a pro-life antisemitic Trump supporter and I didn’t find out until years later when one of my actual friends told me. Also broke me. You pretending to be an ally ain’t very girlboss of you.

I also had a white cishet man that was like “just because we disagree on politics doesn’t mean we can’t be friends 🤪🥺” like no, sir, I can’t be friends because you disagree with my very existence and vote for people that are oppressing me and committing genocide against my community.

Similarly, I had a dick in high school trying to “politely” cisplain to me why it’s okay for trans people to be banned from the military because we are “mentally ill and the military could be dangerous for us 🥹” like yeah no shit, welcome to the military industrial complex that YOU signed up for too, but I can’t. Also being trans isn’t a mental illness. It’s people like that that vex me the most.

Also, shoutout to the girl who broke my heart by completely ghosting me and never talking to me again after she found out I gave her an anonymous rose for Valentine’s Day. She lived in an even smaller red rural city so uh. Kaylee if you’re out there, I was in love with you and you didn’t even properly reject me, just. Stopped hanging out with me and that hurt. So much. I deserved an explanation at the very least. I would have understood if you didn’t wanna date me.

You know who were some of the best allies at that same place though? The girl that tried her hardest to use my pronouns, even though she once called me “biologically a girl” when talking about FAFSA.

It was my super progressive dual credit English teacher, who was a DOCTOR btw, who would sometimes call me “Miss *chosen name*” and then apologize for her mistake.

One of my closest friends, who to this day sometimes accidentally calls me ma’am, and corrects herself, and also said I listen to “lesbian music” one time (tbh she wasn’t 100% wrong).

My economics teacher who would mess up my pronouns over and over again, but kept trying anyways, showed up to my top 10% honors dinner and took pictures with me in a suit and tie, and defended my transness when my parents were being transphobic towards me.

My school nurse and principal, who offered for me to use the women’s nurse bathrooms because that was the only option available for me. And my principal also defended me and was quite “aggressive” according to my mom cause she refused to let my parents be transphobic towards me.

My Latina Spanish teachers, who did their best even though our language as Latines (I’m Mexican btw) is extremely gendered and were always so sweet to me. I don’t like being called “mija,” but it’s the affection that was there that matters.

It was my classmate who called me a queen when I offered her muffins but then was like “oops my bad, sorry king,” who restored my faith in Gen Z.

The white lady that took my senior picture, who offered me the fem outfit and when I told her I wanted to wear a suit she went “I can respect that, that’s valid” and gave me what I wanted to wear.

My two cis Black gay male friends, who would say stuff to me like “no ma’aaaaam” but later eventually caught on and then they were like “no sirrrrr…”

My biology Muslim teacher whose name I don’t remember (he wasn’t teaching for too long because he kept getting made fun of for his SWANA accent unfortunately, and that got to him) who would try his best to call me by my name even though he would use the wrong pronouns.

And my physics teacher, who let two of my classmates and I start my school’s first LGBTQIA+ club when no other teacher would (not even the only openly gay teacher) and put up with our weekly meetings and never outed anyone. He would say funky things like “do any of you girls think you might be homosexuals?” (I wasn’t out as trans then) He would also talk about how he thought it was cool that a type of fungi has thousands of sexes and would just. Vibe with us the way a sweet millennial ally uncle would. I think later he ran over a deer and a cop cause I think he was on drugs since he didn’t look too hot the last day I saw him in class, but anyways shoutout to him. I did not learn a single thing about physics in his class but I did learn how to catch crickets to feed a lizard.

People aren’t perfect, but I would much rather educate person #1 than person #2. And I say this as a queer transmasc nonbinary person that has been out for years.

"The trannies should be able to piss in whatever toilet they want and change their bodies however they want. Why is it my business if some chick has a dick or a guy has a pie? I'm not a trannie or a fag so I don't care, just give 'em the medicine they need."

"This is an LGBT safe space. Of COURSE I fully support individuals who identify as transgender and their right to self-determination! I just think that transitioning is a very serious choice and should be heavily regulated. And there could be a lot of harm in exposing cis children to such topics, so we should be really careful about when it is appropriate to mention trans issues or have too much trans visibility."

One of the above statements is Problematic and the other is slightly annoying. If we disagree on which is which then working together for a better future is going to get really fucking difficult.

[perikrone]

Any time I see an anti-trans legislation map I know I'm gonna see some just absolutely awful takes from coastal trans ppl

[menaceadored]

hard to enjoy fandom things when you are female, a lesbian, trans, and living in the southern US

i fear i have doomscrolled too far from the sun and now my feed is filled with only the bleakest of subjects

[titan-god-helios]

i love you black trans people. i love you asian trans people from all over asia (not just east asia). i love you hispanic trans people. i love you indigenous trans people. i love you poc trans people. you're doing great, i promise you, and i'm so fucking sorry the community erases you as much as it does.

[stargore]

new patch vest 💖💖💖 it’s so silly!!!! im very proud!!!!!

and ALSO…

IT GLOWS IN THE DARK.

how cool is that?!?!?!?!?!?! i wore it out for the first time to a show last night and it got sooo many compliments i’m so so so happy

[pumpomulos]

[cheescheesy]

kenny & marjorine 🥺🌷

[bekandrew]

A Good Trans Medical Story

This morning I had surgery today for the phase 1/trial period/temporary version of the nerve stimulator bladder implant I'm supposed to be getting (and first of all, holy shit! A relatively minimally invasive and easily reversible trial period for implants!!!). I'm decades younger than the usual patient that needs this, but I had sepsis earlier this year and it fucked up a lot of things, including leaving me walking with a cane. It should be noted that I'm transmasc and I live in Mississippi. Even though the doctor I was seeing wasn't in a religious hospital when I saw him for appointments, he had surgical space at one of the religious hospitals - and his people had marked me as Male in my records. Even when I had to clarify with the receptionist at the Mississippi religious hospital that I was trans because it was potentially relevant to the surgery, she was kind and happy to help me, and even went out of her way to ask a supervisor how to enter the information properly so it wouldn't get messed up. It should be further noted that the surgery had nothing to do with transitioning in the slightest, I was just a person who happened to be trans seeking healthcare. Even the original sepsis had nothing inherently to do with my transness, really, just poverty and being brushed off as "med-seeking" until I was obviously and visibly dying. The surgical nurse was polite when asking whether I still had the equipment needed for pregnancy to determine whether I needed the routine pre-procedure pregnancy test. No one gawked or made a big deal about anything. There was only one person who misgendered me, but I don't remember how long they were actually in the room, and I don't know whether they even saw anything other than my long hair. So I don't know for sure whether it was malicious and will choose to believe it was accidental because the rest of the experience went well. Beyond that, when I was (as usual) a difficult stick for the IV - I probably have some scar tissue in places from the sheer number of times I've been hospitalized or needed ER trips - the nurse tried only a couple short times before reaching for the lidocaine and using what would be a normally painful spot in the wrist. he got a great, painless IV line in only one more try and I wish hospitals would just do that sort of thing with me from now on. 11/10.

The surgery itself was also significantly less painful than other surgeries I've had before, and they provided low-dose but still completely sufficient medication and recommendations for how much ibuprofen to take. My symptoms already seem to be getting better to the extent I hadn't realized quite how bad they were before and I'm very excited to get the full implant soon after the trial period is over. My quality of life is going to increase measurably.