#tragedy of comp het

[fairy-ganj-mother]

i hate how there were so many people i just didnt realize i loved

[tortoiseguy]

"Farcille is such a fun ship that's so well written! It sucks it's not canon though"

THEY LITERALLY MIRROR ORPHEUS AND EURYDICE'S STORY AS ONE OF THE MOST ICONIC AND SAPHIC CODED AS FUCK TRAGEDYS IN GREEK MYTHOLOGY

SHE USES HER OWN GOD DAMN BLOOD RUN THROUGH HER OTHERWISE PERFECT DONE UP AND CLEAN HAIR TO QUITE LITERALLY BIRTH FALIN FROM THE DRAGONS CORPSE USING FORBIDDEN MAGIC AFTER LITERALLY PAIN STAKINGLY PIECING TOGETHER FALINS CORPSE BONE BY BONE

It is so insane to me how people try to argue farcille isn't technically canon when all the fucking text points to that being the case. There are thousands of straight stories with the exact same plot as farcille. We're either of them a man everyone in the world would be like "ya they're obviously romantic."

FUCKING people are out here tripping over themselves to write entire ass blog posts to explain how a single line of dialogue between marcille and laios is not romantic and actually very platonic. THERE IS LITERALLY ZERO EVIDENCE TO SUGGEST ANYTHING ROMANTIC BETWEEN THOSE TWO

Like idk man if an entire Fandom all basically collectively have the exact same reading of some charcaters it's sort of no longer a reading and becomes just how the author wrote it.

You're doing the thing! You're comp het-ing!!! Stop!!!!!!

[fandomfreakstudios]

*cracks knuckles* I guess I gotta be coherent for this shit, huh

So, Raguma made a very good post here, that talked about her opinions on Peanutbutter’s feelings for Bojack earlier in the series, and the way she wrote about Peanutbutter slowly falling in love with Bojack hath inspired me (also I need to stay awake really bad, I can’t fall asleep I need to leave the house in an hour and a half)

I’m not gonna claim I don’t like the idea of Peanutbutter pining and nursing a secret massive “love at first sight” crush on Bojack since the 90s. It’s fun, it’s interesting, it is an impactful reading of Peanutbutter’s early-series behaviour that brings some well-earned queerness into a piece of media I know and love.

Do I think it’s canon..?

Kinda

I think having stuff be cut and dry like that is a disservice not only to the characters depth, but to the realism that the show is always managing to portray to a truly stunning degree. That conclusion just feels so… one note in comparison to basically all other Peanutbutter analysis i’ve seen.

Really think about it. We all know about the Labrador Peninsula, we’ve talked about it a thousand times by now, so i’m not gonna use too much space reiterating. But tl:dr the peninsula is a very cookie-cutter environment that cuts out any sort of negativity or perceived abnormality.

An environment like that wouldn’t exactly be the most ideal environment to develop the sort of vocabulary that would help him understand and recognize his own queer feelings. While never actively bigoted it’s still easy to fall in the “it’s ok for everyone but me” sort of mindset.

Implying that Peanutbutter would have a solid and identifiable crush on Bojack in the homophobic 90s is just… not the most true to life. It’s unfortunate, but that bit of tragedy is kind of ingrained into the circumstances of his childhood and the political environment of the era.

Furthermore, implying Peanutbutter KNOWS he has a crush on his peer while repeatedly getting into relationships and marriages just feels… scummy. It undercuts the loyalty that is so central to his character until his divorce with Diane. That moment with Diane is supposed to be a huge dip in morality, but implying he would do something similar with Bojack and his wives, even just on an emotional level, leaves the impression he’s just kind of like that, which removes some of the impact of him cheating on pickles.

But I ALSO don’t think the crush is necessarily something he just suddenly develops post canon, or even mid series.

I think Mr. Peanutbutter is a victim of Comp Het

And this isn’t necessarily just for his potential unrecognized and under-developed feelings for Bojack, I’m talking total queer denial. I think he’s Pan, and Pan specifically, not TRULY caring about the gender of his partner, but also not recognizing his feelings for men as romantic.

Also, throwing some autism in there, mistaking a crush on Bojack as some sort of fixation. He could definitely realistically have Horsin’ Around be a special interest of his, and of COURSE he would respect the wonderful actor who brought one of the main characters to life! (also side note about the autism, him learning how to mask and socially present from a combination of both his overly cheery hometown, and an overly fake Hollywoo)

And another thing! One very good point Raguma brought up in the post I linked earlier, was the way in which Peanutbutter had his relationships. About how his relationships with others often lacked a certain depth and emotional connection (I personally believe this is something he craves but has no idea how to actually pursue). ALSO that Peanutbutter would only really know the sort of persona that Bojack put forth until a lot closer to the end of the series.

This is definitely part of the complicated semi-feelings and semi-fixation he has on Bojack. Thinking he’s cool, and thinking he’s another fun famous guy who he REALLY likes and appreciates and wants to spend time with. And as Bojack opens up, and Peanutbutter emotionally matures, their relationship becomes more deep and powerful.

I know my thoughts are very disjointed right now but I have a ton of them and I want to at least get them out there

[harmonicabisexuals]

i do think cameron was being truthful when she said she wasn't in love with house by the end of season 3 (she still loved him ofc but the puppy love crush was long gone at this point) but it IS hilarious/tragic that she chooses to be with chase instead cause like...her original reasoning for hooking up with him was that he was the person she'd be least likely to fall in love with- aka, he was the one person from her perspective who was the least like house. which makes sense, seeing as foreman's whole end of s3 arc was how much he didn't want to be like house even though he had become exactly like house, and everyone could see it. but, as we see in "the jerk", chase is the only one who figures out house's scheme of sending everyone on a wild goose chase over foreman's cancelled interview. which is really the first clear foreshadowing that actually chase is turning into house 2.0, he's just not as far along as foreman is yet. but cameron doesn't know this, she thinks he's just a boring normie so ofc she drags her feet into a relationship with him because as we know unless the guy is fucked up in some way, she doesn't want him lmao. but, i think she basically comp-hets herself into believing that she needs a "normal" relationship and job to get over whatever the fuck those last three years with house were. the tragedy is of course as chase becomes more and more like house she convinces herself that this is a bad thing (even though hypothetically this should make him more attractive to her) because it's easier than admitting to herself that she never had romantic feelings for chase in the first place <3

[asha-mage]

Shkp bingo: Rand/Asmodean and Perrin/Galad?

[Send me a problematic ship for bingo!]

Randmodean:

Bingo!

Man I have always had a profound softvspot for Asmodean and Rand's relationship, because it is so fucked on every axis and it's a delight. The way Asmodean professes despair even while secretly dreaming of Rand's triumph, the way Rand projects so much of his own self hatred and anger at Asmodean despite the fact that Asmodean proves his loyalty to Rand's cause repeatedly, and Asmodean accepts it without protest because of the guilt and uncertainty that is eating at him deep down. The way that the forced trust that clashes with both of their desires to stay stand offish and guarded and not take risks or be vulnerable. The way the weight of LTT's soul hangs between them, the unspoken history shared between Joar, Meierin and Lews that is haunting their every interaction. It's so. God. Damn. Delicious.

It's also Rand's tragedy with the Asha'man writ large: Rand is so consumed with his own self hatred, projecting it onto Asmodean, berating Asmodean for things that Rand really feels about himself that he can not recognize Asmodean's genuine efforts to reach out, can not think that maybe redemption is possible, that Asmodean is ready to come back to the Light. Asmodean is a man who can channel, and so can not be trusted or redeemed or saved. It doesn't matter that Asmodean volunteers to join Rand in the fight against Rahvin even knowing how likely his death in the cross fire is (which bears out as true), it doesn't matter that he lends his own two hands to the efforts to help the wounded during the battle against the Shaido, or that he tries his best to heal Rand with his meager strength after Rand collapses. It doesn't matter that Lanfear confirms that Asmodean has truly started to dream of Rand's victory over the Dark One, of helping him reach it. Asmodean is a man who can channel. He is a monster. He shouldn't be trusted or liked or forgiven anymore then Rand ever forgives himself.

Anyways I think they should fuck nasty in the show about all this.

Perrin/Galad:

No bingo, but I still have a soft spot for it. One of those friendships that Sanderson's comp het writing wants us to believe is platonic so badly even though their is something way more messed up and erotic happening under the surface.

Cause. Listen. I'm a simple man. It's about the inherent eroticism of seeing yourself in the monstrous other, of feeling empathy, compassion even attraction to a man dripping with the blood of his enemies and with the eyes of a wolf.

It's about the inherent eroticism that comes from the pleasure of prying open a closed mind with your own fingers, of forcing a pretty white clad paragon to get down with you in the muck of battle and stain his sword saving your life.

Perrin could ruin Galad's perfect neat clean world and philosophies. Galad could lick the gore off Perrin's chin and taste his primal courage. It would be deeply fucked up in that hot fun way.

[tigerlilycorinne]

Is It Bad If My Gums Bleed When I Floss? Review:

10/10!! Or: 5 stars out of 5!

(Yes, it is bad if your gums bleed when you floss.)

This poetry collection is utterly stunning. It gathers together so many ideas that I love to see written about (including but not limited to: the entanglement of love, desire, pain, grief, trauma and healing, and the tragedy of memory and lost youth) into one incredible, cohesive, and connected experience. It follows a dental student, Netty, through her life, from childhood crushes and naivete to sexual desire and sexual trauma, to a beautiful point even with this pain with the love of her life. It is a breathtaking experience, the kind of work you have to be curled up with, at a time and place where it’s possible for you to put it down and close your eyes and breathe deeply before you keep reading. It made me cry multiple times, at this intersection between recognition, tragedy, and joy. I’m happy for Netty and heartbroken for her and everything in between. These poems portray Netty’s humanity in such an intimate, honest, and internal way.

As someone who doesn’t read poetry that often, I was absolutely delighted to understand the narrative that runs through each poem: it is understandable, never confusing, and never so on the nose that it feels like spoon feeding. It gives so much meaning without getting tangled in cross-metaphor, it paints vivid emotion without becoming melodramatic, it draws striking images without getting stuck in descriptive tangent, and it is heartbreakingly earnest without ever crossing into cliche. Behind each pause, space, repeated phrase, and bolded letter is a careful intent—Blue is an artist creating the most authentic and meaningful art-experience with deliberation and rhythm; someone who knows how to best communicate experience in a way that’s both receivable and gut wrenching. Each poem feels essential to the work as a whole; the collection is infinitely more than the sum of its parts because each poem is so deeply interconnected with each other poem: Netty wouldn’t be the same without every single entry.

It is about so many things—exploration of the development of queer desire and comp-het, the way a trauma follows you and the strength it takes to live and love even if it cannot leave you, and, of course, teeth—but most of all it feels like a comprehensively tragic and hopeful collection about the heartbreaking process of growing up. It is steeped in grief for Netty herself. For the Netty before she learned the bad things of the world. It is full of sadness and still recognizes that everyone moves through this loss of innocence; everyone begins wishing their baby teeth meant something more to someone (“I guess I just wanted it to mean more to you / than it did.” (“2004”)) and ends up aware of the darker ideas surrounding keeping a child’s teeth (“I think I get it—what kind of / person / keeps a child’s teeth?” (“Daddy”)). Everyone makes mistakes, or gets taken advantage of, and finds a way to blame themselves, and everyone mourns and misses who they were before the pain. Ultimately, this poetry collection feels to me like an extensive, difficult, beautiful journey to find who Netty is not outside or minus her sadness and her self-grief, but who she is with it. It’s about finding love that doesn’t evoke gore and destruction.

Though it’s difficult to pick favorite poems in a collection that feels as if each poem is most valuable next to each other poem in the collection, I’d have to pick “Career Day,” “Adolescence,” “Anthropophagus,” “Apostrophe,” “Sticky,” “Butterbugs” “Coffee Stains,” and “Things That Don’t Mean Anything At All” (it should say something that I had to list THIS MANY favorite poems). Each made me take a breath before I kept reading. I’m absolutely in love with every one of them.

I love this dearly and I will never forget it.

If you want to pre-order it, go here

If you want to read its goodreads listing go here

[amandabe11man]

the swede being gay-coded makes so much sense, not just in the way chris heyerdahl portrays him, but also in the HOW-verse itself...

a lot of it you just have to see for yourself by watching the show, but first and foremost, the swede is an outcast who nobody likes when we first meet him. he’s a chronic schemer, hounds people for taxes, makes life hard for others because he can etc. but another reason for him being so hated by pm every other character could very well be that he’s gay and not bothering to hide it. this being the 1800′s, of course he’d get some looks. of course he’d get judged. but when we first see him, he’s durant’s right hand man and thus in a position of power. naturally, no one’s dumb enough to fuck with him (until an opportunity arises)

even after being tarred and feathered, he still returns to HOW because where else could he even go? he’s humiliated, loses his job and has to start from the very bottom again, and despite his slightly humbled attitude, he’s still disliked and doesn’t even have the luxuries around him anymore to help him pretend he’s not an outcast. all this, coupled with him not learning from his mistakes and instead letting his fall from grace validate his victim mentality, makes him even more dangerous; a disaster waiting to happen. and oh, he WILL make it happen... hell, not even when he steals bishop dutson’s identity and leaves for a whole other town do people like him. not even when he tries to lead the people at fort smith do the folks there seem to like or even respect him. they don’t question him much because they think he’s the bishop, but it’s still clear everyone’s like “wtf is this dingus doing”. see the tragedy here? even when he pretends to be someone else who’s supposedly benevolent, (in an entirely new town, no less) people STILL don’t like him. once again, he’s an outcast, and the only other person who respects him from that point on in the story is brigham young’s son phineas, who he also ends up using for a petty revenge-plot, because from all these years of being side-eyed, hated and humiliated, the swede has given up on (forgotten) how to love and care for his fellow man.

the only true companion he loves unconditionally (and who loves him back just as much) at any moment in the show is oslo the dog; a stray who’s uncared for by the others and, just like the swede himself, is a social outcast. with oslo, he allows himself to love and care about someone else again for the first time since andersonville... with this little dog he just happened to meet and who doesn’t judge him for who he is or what he’s done. unfortunately, the swede doesn’t allow himself the happiness of disappearing and starting over somewhere else with oslo; so stuck in his years-long victim-mentality that he leaves oslo behind to try to take revenge on bohannon once and for all. the swede’s neverending grudges are a story for another time, though.

lastly, we get a glimpse of how he was back during the war, which ironically seems to be the last time he was happy and at peace before he met oslo. he’s accepted by his comrades in the army, he has friends and feels like he belongs somewhere... at least on the surface. is he really, truly, being himself in the flashbacks we see? there’s something wistful about his smiles in those scenes. something that says “i am happy....but it could be better”.

he talks about some girl named “elsa”, but does elsa really exist, or is she something the swede made up in order to be accepted as one of the guys? trying to live as a comp-het man indeed did get him friends, but in the end, all those friends died and one tried to cannibalize him out of desperate hunger, so maybe the trauma and bitterness born from that made the swede finally act out against a society he knew would never accept him as he was?

because after andersonville, he no longer cared about being accepted. he was craving respect from others, but having people’s fear-based respect is not the same as having those people accept you. he stopped putting on his comp-het act, and so gave people around him just another “reason” to ostracize him. he tells himself he doesn’t care about being an outcast, because look what happened last time he befriended people (they were killed). therefore, it’s simply emotionally safer to keep others at arm’s length, so he won’t bond with someone and have them die on him again. it’s a cruel world for gay people sometimes, even more so in the 1800′s and earlier, and one can hardly blame the swede for ending up a cruel person in the end. the “they think i’m a freak? okay, i’ll BE a freak and they’ll all be sorry”-attitude really comes to mind when I think about the swede’s journey as a character. as stated before, he doesn’t find another human that accepts him for who he really is, not truly. bohannon is the one that comes closest-- is the only person to see the swede for who he is--, but that’s not real acceptance either. bohannon sees him, acknowledges him, hates him but still cares enough to avert his eyes and shed a tear as he watches the swede’s execution-- but bohannon was never gonna accept him after everything he’d done. perhaps in another life, if they both had made better choices, they could’ve been friends... lovers, even. oslo the dog, however, accepts him and is the one to finally bring out the swede’s long dormant capability of love into the open. and OH, how he showers his little dog with love and attention (and food, because he knows all too well what it’s like to go hungry). we get a glimpse of who the swede might’ve been if he’d made better choices and if he hadn’t been reviled by others at almost every turn.

again as stated before, unfortunately, he can’t let go of his grudge against bohannon. with oslo, he’s clearly still capable of love, but the hate and bitterness he feels about society and his fellow man is simply too strong, so he leaves after a loving goodbye to his dog, and in the end, even if the swede came to terms with his fate and his past, it was too late at that point. the hateful society that never accepted him + his own actions because of it brought him to death’s door and-- uh-

there’s a point about gay allegories and why thor “the swede” gundersen fits them all in here somewhere

bonus: then there’s the literal “evidence” too of course. for one, the swede tends to be very touchy-feely with men, and only men. for example:

when he oversees bohannon’s and naomi’s marriage, he puts his hand on bohannon’s head, but not naomi’s

in fact, especially when pretending to be bishop dutson, the swede can’t seem to NOT put his hands on bohannon

bohannon isn’t the only one the swede likes to touch, though. it seems when he’s manipulating someone, tenderly touching the other guy looks to be the swede’s go-to method. he won’t hesitate or think it’s weird to take another man’s hands, to touch their shoulders, and (in phineas’ case) even stroking a man’s cheek and putting their foreheads together as if they were about to kiss

hell, even on the rare occasion where he’s not manipulating someone, the swede seems to still find a way to touch the most random of guys he happens to be talking to. in an extreme example, after his first murder, he tenderly strokes the man’s cheek and coos at him as the guy bleeds out

i can think of only one scene where he touches a woman, but that’s during prayer where he’s simply holding onto the woman’s hands while also holding the hand of her son ezra. and then of course when durant asks him if he’d “ever had his heart ripped out by a woman”, the swede just answers very nonchalantly that his apparent ex-wife didn’t break his heart, “but she did steal his cuckoo clock”. in other words, he couldn’t care less if his former wife left for someone else. arranged marriage much?

[yallemagne]

Oh my god. This is why I have no patience for complaints going waaaaah a couple of people on tunglr write fics where Renfield is too complex or Jonathan is too badass or whatever. Like spare me y'all, far worse shit butchering the characters and the themes is distributed to millions every year through musicals, movies and books

Even the worst fanfic writers... I dunno, some of them are very bad... no, no, jokes aside. Even the worst fanfic writers have nothing on fucking Frank Wildhorn and his crew. Dracula das Musical and Jekyll & Hyde the musical romanticize and fetishize rape, murder, and abuse so damn much and they make MONEY off of it. They do it with silly lil catchy songs that draw in audiences that are willing to overlook the bad because "haha this song is so romantic". It's a song about rape, but okay, hun.

You can depict awful things happening or being said without supporting those things. I'll give even the most self-indulgent fanfic writers a chance because that is what fanfic writing is supposed to be: self-indulgent. Even when it's obvious that a fic writer actually does romanticize bad things... it does overall less harm than actual big adaptations.

By rewriting Dracula into a romantic musical where Dracula is the romantic lead, the writers are posing Dracula as being in the right. There is no nuance. His evil actions are EVIL they cause SO MUCH PAIN, but they smush in a few more weepy ballads about being lonely and say "he's actually a good guy once you get over your girlfriend's untimely death and start huffing lead paint". This is unlike, you know, classical tragedies where the main character gets his comeuppance because of some fatal flaw. Dracula does not die at the end of the Dracula musical because of any of his actions or character flaws. He dies because the writers realized at the last second that Dracula getting the girl is a bad ending.

Now, part of this ask is evidently referring a bit to some... recent drama. I've ranted about it before, so I'll spare specifics. Now, Dracula from the Dracula musical is an awful person, but the narrative functionally treats him as the underdog hero of the story. Look at all these cuckolds trying to keep him down. All he's trying to do is harm women, is that so bad? So, when a story depicts a character doing something wrong, the people who adore that character will probably be fine with it so long as the story does not acknowledge those actions as wrong. Because... if your favourite character... did something bad... then, are you bad?

No. Your poor little meow meow is kind of an asshole, I thought you knew this. That's what made you like them, right? Renfield did bad things. It's only fair to acknowledge that. He attacked Seward-- and yes, I know a great deal of y'all were in support of murdering Seward, but he did it so Seward would be unavailable to watch Lucy. He's indirectly responsible for Lucy's death. He's directly responsible for Mina's assault (though he did try to stop it). He tries to atone and gets killed after going against Dracula, but it doesn't take away the damage his actions caused. There's not enough content surrounding Renfield, to be perfectly honest. Though, I dread the writing that will result from that godawful comp-het disaster of a movie coming out.

I've never seen any fics that make Jonathan "too badass", honestly. Most fanfics severely undercut his capabilities and agency because um *whispers* most fanfics are Dracula/Jonathan. For once I want a Dracula 2020 fic that gives Jonathan a gun and fr kills Dracula. But that aside, that aside, even the stories that do make Jonathan "badass"... they don't really. He's strong and sexy, obviously, but that's just canon. The fact they go more in-depth as to how and why he's strong and sexy doesn't make it unbelievable. And those fics don't strip him of his weaknesses, he retains his PTSD. No fanfic like... ever... has made Jonathan a macho man.

[thehollywoodhootsman]

The number of people I've seen getting mad at the fact that Caitvi is a canon thing now is crazy. Like, even some of my queer friends are talking about how they hated them getting together, and it's like, idk, I'm just happy we didn't get another sapphic romance ending in tragedy. I'm glad we didn't get a bury your gays scenario.

Idk, representation like this makes me feel just a little bit more like no matter what happens, one day I might finally get to meet a woman I love who loves me back, and we too might get a chance to be domestic and soft and happy. This ending and other happy sapphic endings show us what the majority of the world doesn't want us to know: we (sapphics) can absolutely be happy, fulfilled, and loved in long-term relationships. Things like bigotry, comp-het, and sheer lack of numbers might make it harder, but it IS possible.

Endings like this show me that one day I, too, can say some cheesy ass line to the woman I love, and she too will snuggle herself deeper into me. I might try to avoid the prison sex tho, we can get just as hot on the bed lmao.

I'm still in disbelief that the end of Arcane was a scene reassuring us that Caitlyn and Vi are together? and happy? and GOING to continue being happy? And build a whole life together after all the things they've been through? And be stupidly domestic and soft? THAT was the actual ending of this show?! and the episode was named after Vi's final vow that she's sticking with Caitlyn for the rest of her life? I don't think we can ever understate what an absolute win this was for gay representation in media. Bless this masterpiece that spawned from a sweaty mmo man, who could have guessed this is where we'd end up

[quillkiller]

I’m so glad you like them!!! I was really nervous about talking about them but I needed to get it out cuz none of my friends know I’m freak 😔. I absolutely adore them! And yes, mrs Williams having a first husband that Andy reminds her of!! I think he died, I’m not sure how, but I think that they already had kid together at that point and mrs Williams was desperate to get remarried so she married a man who had a good job who could provide for her but she had no real love for him. Then it was all for naught cuz he loses his job and they have to move to a ‘seedier’ neighborhood. I think however, that the time that Andy and her spent together was very beneficial for the both of them, not only just In the obvious way but also bc Andy is, at first, very sleazy, kind of a dirtbag but thru falling for an older more ‘sophisticated’ woman he learns that he wants to change, he wants to be a better man not only for her but also for his brother. He’s still kinda sleazy but he gets better. And on mrs Williams end I think thru having an affair and disobeying her husband, finally doing something for herself she become a lot more whole. After that summer I think she divorces her husband, moves away, and lives out her life a lot happier. It’s still very melancholy for the both of them but I think at the end they’re a lot happier and a lot better off after everything.

Enough rambling about them!!! It’s time for fucked up brother sister dynamics!! I honestly want her to be a lesbian, I think it would be really good for her. I think after the bachelorette party Annalise has a lot to come to terms with, she deludes herself for a while that she wasnt into it bc that’s Wrong, and that it was just a way to get back at her brother. She goes into full comphet mode and gets a sleazy grimy boyfriend who’s like 24 or something. She hates him so much tho and breaks it off after like 2 months. Annalise does eventually move away, goes to college, comes to term with her lesbianism, cuts her hair in a panic over her first girl crush. All that jazz. But I think her brother still haunts her sometimes. She’s mostly come to terms with it by now but after all, he’s still her family, she still has to go home every winter and see him and his wife. WHICH!! Btw let’s talk ab the wife!! I think her names some very basic name like shelia or something. She’s the real tragedy here, cuz while Annalise escapes to the Big City TM shelia can never!! She’s stuck, forever a wife, forever a daughter, forever a mother. And she hates it!!! But there’s nothing she can do! So she jsut has to sit there, picture perfect wife, over thanksgiving staring at the one woman who made her feel something. Staring at her and whatever girlfriend Annalise has brought over,, thinking about that night.

this reply is so late but trust!!!! i’ve been thinking about this constantly…… im so happy you wanted to share them with me :,) 🤍

GOD I LOVE MRS WILLIAMS AND ANDY….. and her desperately wanting to remarry as fast as possible to make sure she and her child are provided for…. and then the new husband loses his job and they have to move to a worse neighbourhood. god it breaks my HEART. she’s everything to me i want this to be a film so bad. & andy and his brother. god… and this affair being a trigger point for both of them, with a happy ending but not a happy ending together. but like. melancholy like you said. oh it’s so sweet ……

FULL COMP HET MODE AND SLIMY BOYFRIEND I KNOW THATS RIGHT…….. moving away and cutting her hair when she tries to figure out her identy/has her first crush on a girl . we’ve all been there… god i love her. and yeah, its still so complicated because she cant ever fully get away from her brother. that’s still her brother. she’ll still see him, and maybe they’ll regress to their old dynamics whenever theyre under the same roof, and GOD !!!! you’re so brilliant. AND SHELIA !!!!!! THE FIANCE !!!!!! the real victim !!!!!! shelia can never escape oh God. doomed to be a wife, a mother and resenting it. SHELIA ILL SAVE YOU……. the image of them all spending thanksgiving together and her watching annalise and all her girlfriends, thinking back to that one night where she felt alive. oh it makes me fucking sick to my stomach.. alexa plat good luck babe chappel roan …….

[funeral-clown]

yeah your comp het was bad but did you ever get really into ed sheeran

[nellasbookplanet]

I've never liked the term 'fix-it fic'.

When I read and/or write a fic with a different pairing than in canon, it doesn’t mean I necessarily think the canon pairing is wrong and needs to be fixed. When I read alternate endings where someone lives instead of dies, it doesn’t mean I think the original story should’ve kept that character alive.

It’s all about possibility, curiosity, exploring dynamics we only glimpsed or didn’t get around to at all in canon. I recognize the themes and their importance and see how these things might actively have worsened the source material, but in a fic, operating under different themes and having zero impact on the canonical outcome? It’s fun to explore. It doesn’t mean I wanted it to happen in canon.

But sometimes I come across people who seem to think the only reason people read so called fix-it fics (god, I really do hate that name) is because they’re in denial, unaware of or doesn’t grasp the themes of the source material, too immature to handle dark themes in fiction (and, if the accuser is feeling especially mean, therefore too immature to handle the darker aspects of real life).

Conversely, there certainly are fix-its written with the express purpose of 'fixing'. Sometimes they are even right! (something being canonical doesn't automatically make it good, you know?) But most of the time they come off as dismissive, entitled, and, yes, even as denial of the canonical themes in favor of others (often much more shallow and not as supported by the narrative), and are also the exact kind of fics that I avoid.

Much as I enjoy a Molly lives-fic (I just want to see him interact with the nein and find out about all the hijinks they got up to post his death!), erasing Kingsley and ignoring his purpose as a character feels wrong. Writing off Jester's feelings for Fjord as comp-het or their relationship as toxic to facillitate another pairing (what would Jester finding out about Beau’s or Caleb’s feelings have looked like? let's explore!) feels dismissive of her character and ignores much of her development and growing understanding of romance over the course of the campaign. Shadowgast fics that write off Caleb’s feelings for Jester (or even retroactively give him feelings for Molly instead) feels dismissive of Caleb as a character.

But the assumption that ALL alternate happy endings, everybody lives nobody dies, different main pairing-fics operate under 'canon sucks and I refuse to engage with the narrative themes, also I refuse to reckon with death and tragedy as a concept' is just. Mean and dismissive, and the term fix-it fic doesn't help in fighting that.

[saint-starflicker]

This is now funny because Colin is Alexander's secret boyfriend and that is canon.

I can only imagine Alexander's frustration that James and Oliver are comp-hetting their entire friend group into a Hamlet finale tier of tragedy while he is out and proud and the diversity token subplot in Oliver's tragic coming of age. I'd overdose on meth, too, Alexander.

[ Oliver Marks narrating: A few stubborn drops of water clung to James's cheeks. He didn't quite look like himself, somehow. He seemed so fragile I was afraid to touch him. He started to say something—maybe my name—but only the ghost of a sound slipped out before he stopped, pressed the back of his hand against his mouth. My chest ached, but the ache went deeper than muscle and bone, like some sharp thing had ripped a little hole right through me. I risked reaching toward him. He let out a small shuddering sigh, then breathed more easily. For a long time we sat side by side without speaking, my hand on his shoulder. ]

[ meme of a large trollfaced stick figure making to headbutt two regular-sized stick figures with surprised expressions against each other, captioned with NOW KISS ! ]

I am still not enough of a bardolater to get very into this. There's definitely a group dynamic that the narrator knows and is comfortable with but I'm just sort of ..who are these people again??... Colin, who is Colin.

[meteorologears]

4 your recent reblog, catch-22 >:)

001 | Send me a fandom and I will tell you my:

Favorite character: Pass. Too many guys to choose from.

Least Favorite character: It'd have to be Aarfy. Not a massive Kid Sampson fan either he's just a non-entity to me.

5 Favorite ships (canon or non-canon): Clevinger/Dunbar Milo/Wintergreen Cathcart/Korn (I didn't even consider this one until more recently) Yossarian/the chaplain Michaela/Luciana (I think they're nice)

Character I find most attractive: Luciana from the movie adaptation OR Wintergreen from the failed 1970 sitcom pilot

Character I would marry: Scheisskopf's wife. Terminal case of comp-het and mathematics major but I think I could fix her

Character I would be best friends with: Chief White Halfoat

a random thought: everyone should own a dumb Hawaiian shirt like they do on M*A*S*H, if for no other reason than to increase the tragedy of things like Cathcart sobbing at his desk over the concept of Yossarian!!!(?)! while wearing said Hawaiian shirt.

An unpopular opinion: I like the concept of the genderbends better than the original, non-genderbent characters--except for a few of them. I think the story can be told exactly the same, although with genderbends, there's an additional layer of introspection and tragedy.

My Canon OTP: Cathcart/Korn (none of these are really canon nor intended by Heller unless it's like... Yossarian/Luciana. However, I do think a good case could be made for the worst guys ever just from the actual book context)

My Non-canon OTP: Clevinger/Dunbar. Though Milo/Wintergreen is a close second because of how unhinged they are.

Most Badass Character: Moodus

Most Epic Villain: None of the villains in this are epic. If I had to pick, though, Korn.

Pairing I am not a fan of: Yossarian/Orr, not because I don't think it couldn't've happened, but because I can't write Orr for the life of me and thus can't imagine him doing anything ever.

Character I feel the writers screwed up (in one way or another): Every time someone tries to adapt Cathcart they fail awfully. Also, every adaptation screws up Wintergreen and Dunbar but only because they don't include them.

Favourite Friendship: Whatever Yossarian and Dunbar had going on. Get a friend who will pretend to be sick and leave his own squadron 24/7 regardless of what he's supposed to be doing to hang out with you.

Character I most identify with: Maybe Wintergreen?

Character I wish I could be: I would not want to be any of them. Everything sucks for everyone all the time and nobody wins. #love

Ask me anything from this post!

[ohlookitstomorrowff]

Glinda for the hc ask game

(All my opinions are heavily biased because I just love Glinda too much…)

1. Sexuality headcanon?

Glinda is a lesbian. 100% lesbian. In every iteration of Oz. She’s gay. Fight me on that, but I’m right:)

2. Otp?

Glinda and Elphaba! (Although I think Elphaba really owes Glinda so many apologies… but hey, apologies can be cute)

3. Brotp?

3. Glinda and Crope! I want to know more about what they got up to in the EC after Shiz. Both of them were heartbroken - Crope had lost Tibbet, and Glinda had been abandoned by Elphaba - and I think that they must’ve had some wild nights in aristocratic ballrooms where they got drunk and caused an absolute scene just to forget their pain. Plus, they’re like the genderswapped version of each other; both of them are so sassy, flamboyantly camp, dramatic, and gay, that I just love them.

4. Notp?

Glinda/Fiyero/Elphaba Nope! Sorry, it’s not for me. I’m not a fan of any poly ships in general - not because I think there’s anything wrong with it, it’s just not my cup of tea - but I cannot see this at all. Glinda’s too possessive to want to share, and Fiyero’s not a girl so… he’s not doing anything for her (apart from highlighting her comp-het in the musical and stealing her girlfriend in both the book and the musical).

5. First headcanon that pops into your head?

That It was Glinda, not Chuffrey, that couldn’t have children, and it really messed with her head. That’s why she’s so distant with Rain at the start of ‘Out of Oz,’ but Glinda is an emotional little ball of feelings and can’t help loving the little girl that reminds her so much of Elphaba. Gregory Maguire already killed me with the fact that he had to go and make Glinda’s life such a tragedy, but making her have to give Rain away to the company of the Time Dragon Clock to keep her safe just when they were starting to get close - and to have it mirror the way Elphaba left her in the Emerald City - I’ll never forgive him. That was too much, bro!

6. One way which I relate to the character?

Her determination to do the right thing always overcomes her own need for self-preservation in the end - even though she tries to lie to herself about her reasoning. Glinda is very pragmatic and always tries to follow what her head is telling her, she weighs up the options and makes a decision that’s best for everyone, until she can’t ignore her heart. I’m a bit like that too.

7. Moment that gives me secondhand embarrassment?

I’m too biased for this question, I think this woman is perfect, and that her flaws only make her more so because she owns them - remember, she tells Elphaba at Nessarose’s funeral “I’m no pawn. I take all the credit in the world for my own foolishness.” In saying that, sometimes I dislike the way the musical goes out of its way to make her appear unintelligent and too spoiled or stuck-up, but I think that’s more disappointment than embarrassment.

8. Cinnamon roll or problematic fave?

Do you even need to ask? Glinda is THE cinnamon roll to beat all other cinnamon rolls, and I won’t be accepting criticism on that, thank you.

(This was fun. Send more characters to my ask box so that I can avoid the mountain of uni work I have to do… please? And it doesn’t need to just be wicked characters.)

[volturialice]

Spork Haven chapter 25: gone with the fucking wind

welcome to spork haven, where I spork the EL James fic you’ve never heard of

previous chapter | next chapter | contents

previously on Spork Haven:

recently-dumped actor!edward Possibility’ed his way back to london! esme was there! there was a time skip and everything interesting happened offscreen! orphaned ex-hotel maid juilliard dropout zillionaire murder witness bella moved back to new orleans with jasper! emmett went through her garbage and came to london to tell edward that she’s (gasp) pregnant! edward’s hopping a flight across the atlantic to snatch his girl back from that luminous-hazel-eyed fucksmith jasper!

chapter 25 has one of the best opening sentences to date:

there are a mere 6 “fucks” in the first paragraph, in which Edward describes how he has stepped into “Gone with the Fucking Wind.” there are actually several more Gone with the Wind references in this chapter (at least, I assume that’s what’s being referenced; I’ve never actually seen or read it), enough to make it clear that erika sees plantation owner life as aspirational. because of course she does. fair warning that this chapter is absolutely steeped in “la di da, wasn’t the antebellum south grand” racism.

still standing outside Bella’s mansion, Edward is deeply unnerved by the flora of Louisiana. (us locals too, Edward. careful of that spanish moss, there are probably chiggers in there.) having run out of Gone With the Wind references, he’s forced to reference a different movie:

if you wanted to look at english oaks you could’ve stayed in england, asshat.

still standing outside (seriously, he’s out there for a full page) he hears Bella playing the cello in her mansion and thinks about how he can’t let her “slip through his fucking fingers.” then he rings the doorbell, “heart in his fucking mouth,” and...

Bella’s housekeeper answers. Edward is shocked that his old-money, plantation-owning girlfriend has servants. a few things to note about Bella’s housekeeper are 1) she’s Mrs. Cope, 2) she looks exactly like the middle-aged, blonde housekeeper from 50 sh@des (is that also Mrs. Cope?), and 3) that she talks in a comically rendered southern accent.

I honestly can’t believe we made it this far into the story without hearing the word “master” only for it to show up now, in this context. 🤢 oh well.

once inside, Edward makes a dozen more Gone With the Wind comparisons as he describes the furniture and architecture. pretty amusing how he and erika think it’s gay to drink champagne, but not to wax poetic about upholstery and Scarlett O’Hara’s crinoline.

at last, “Little Bella Swan” (spelled right for the very first time! gold star, erika!) appears. at first she’s “shy as fuck,” but then she admits she’s missed him and that’s Edward’s “fucking cue” to start making out with her, in a paragraph full of hot, sensual details like this:

I’m sorry, but did you just say she was...running her fingers...through your stubble? 

how long is this alleged “stubble?” did Edward grow the patchy, ginger equivalent of a full-on Gandalf beard and just forget to mention it to the audience?? HOW is she running her FINGERS through his STUBBLE?

...this is the sideburns kink all over again, isn’t it

anyway, they keep making out, blah blah, it’s getting hot and heavy, when

oh no! has the Dicksona been suffering from amnesia? how tragic! guys i’m starting a gofundme for the Dicksona please chip in if you can 💕

anyway, Bella drags Edward up to her bedroom, he describes in great detail the “dark wood” bed complete with “fuck-off gossamer mosquito net,” and then tells us he doesn’t notice his surroundings because he’s so horny for Bella.

....erika. just a little writing tip. you don’t get to describe Edward’s surroundings in minute, Antiques Roadshow detail and then tell us he doesn’t notice them. that’s not how storytelling works in the first fucking person.

anyway, Bella gives him a blowjob

“using her teeth”

and then they have sex. erika makes sure to tell us all about such pertinent details as bella’s

well at least one of them showers.

we’re also told about her steel nipples.

then Edward calls her “homely,” which I know can also mean “cozy and familiar,” but I can’t get past the meaning of “ugly.”

and of course, the scene wouldn’t be complete without Edward once again reminding us that Bella is his safe haven.

anyway. that’s all that’s notable about this particular humdrum sex scene.

still in bed, Edward asks Bella to marry him. before she can answer, they’re interrupted by “the fucking doorbell.”

y a w l 

that’s right, it’s Jasper! none other than the fucksmith himself. 

Edward reacts with the calm stability he’s renowned for

and demands that Bella answer his marriage proposal right that second. Bella tells him it’s complicated.

then she throws on some clothes and goes downstairs to see Jasper. Edward is appalled that she’s talking to “that fucksmith” while going commando.

and then. and then we get the GAYEST PASSAGE imaginable. fasten your seatbelts:

that’s right. Edward...wants Jasper...to see him half-naked with his fly undone.

safe haven is a story about unrequited Edward/Jasper and the tragedy of comp het actually

it doesn’t help that one of the next sentences is:

yeah, Edward. I bet you wish he was. bet you wish he was getting ALL up on them.

Edward—who has been explicitly told to leave Bella alone and let her talk to Jasper—shows up to half-nakedly interrupt their conversation and mark his territory. then he promises to go “back upstairs” and leaves the room, but hangs around to eavesdrop on the rest of their conversation because he’s a controlling piece of shit.

at first, Jasper tries to make a graceful exit, but when Bella gets tearful and starts pleading (girl why? you don’t like him), he snaps at her that she’s obviously made her bed and she can lie in it (I hear it’s dark wood and has fuck-off mosquito netting!)

and with that, the luminous-hazel-eyed fucksmith drops the mic and leaves.

Bella wanders back into her bedroom and tells Edward she wanted to let Jasper down easily, which. bad job there. she also apologizes in a way that makes it sound like she’s about to re-re-break up with him, and “the abyss opens its foul mouth” before him. it’s no Dicksona, but this abyss sure gets mentioned a lot.

but of course Bella isn’t breaking up with him—she’s just confessing that she’s pregnant! 

Edward tells her he already knows, and when she asks how, he says

but wait, erika, I thought mad meant crazy? my little american brain can’t comprehend this sentence! I shan’t ever be able to make sense of all these erudite britishisms. ‘tis all too advanced.

Edward tells Bella about Emmett’s dumpster diving and narcing, and she’s totally cool with it. she didn’t tell Edward she was pregnant because she was afraid he’d leave her.

but she...had already...left him. make it make sense, erika

Bella doesn’t understand why a “hot shot movie star” like Edward would ever want to be saddled with a filthy rich, mansion-owning cello prodigy like little old her. Edward interrupts by proposing to her yet again (for those of you keeping track, this is the third time,) only this time it’s Worse.

okay, first of all this is horrible for me personally because my parents got engaged in the middle of Siberia and the only available ring for sale was an earring, so. thank you, erika, for permanently ruining my family history.

second of all,

the absolute audacity of this man.

put yourself in SH!Bella’s shoes for a second and imagine your kazillionaire movie star boyfriend proposing to you with your own earring that he stole. 

like, obviously erika was trying for romantic spontaneity here, but a) it’s not spontaneous when it’s the third time this has happened, and b) he flew across the ocean with the explicit intention of winning Bella back. he couldn’t have stopped and purchased a ring at some point? he made everyone pull over at Tiffany’s on the way to the Oscars, for fuck’s sake.

the moral of the story is “no need to spend three months’ salary when your girl has severe self-esteem issues,” because of course “Isabella Swann” (yep, we’re back to Swann) says yes. Edward reassures her that he’s cool with the whole baby thing and wants lots of kids, and tells her (out loud!) that she is his safe haven. Bella asks him to “make love to her” again and they end the chapter in

ok then.

best “fucks”

“fuck off columns or colonnades or whatever the fuck they’re called”

“fucking Atlanta”

“fucking servants”

“the fucking doorway”

“another fucking century”

“fan-fucking-tastic”

“no more Mr. Fucking nice guy” (edward)

“fucking bastard” (edward)

“a fucking marathon”

next (and final) chapter: eternal fucking flame