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kass-storycorner · 3 years ago

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An unpleasant surprise

I should definitely do my coursework instead of writing this fic, however the idea just came into my head and I couldn’t focus until I wrote this down. Writing this took waaaay longer than I anticpiated and it was way more spontanious... so it’s not proof read or anything, still hope you’ll enjoy it.

The idea/prompt: character is secretly in love with you, but won’t tell you because you are already in a relationship with someone else. Character however finds out that your partner is cheating on you – this is how they would react/act upon finding it out

Word count: 3637 Words (I’m sorry)

Character: Kaeya x gn!reader (in this it’s still very platonic and one sided love) Genre: Angst (?), Hurt, Comfort, even a bit of humour but maybe not, idk haha

Content warnings: cheating, threats, mention of blood and a major injury, mentioning of Dilucs and Kaeyas past, but nothing to explicit (tried to avoid the major spoilers)

Format: The first part / backstory is written in bullet points, but at the end you’ll find a fic written in the normal text format

He just wanted to drown his sorrows in peace at the Angel’s Share, but no. He had to be witness to that disgusting display of infidelity of your (hopefully soon to be ex-) boyfriend

Kaeya has known you for several years now, both of you started around the same time in the Knights of Favonius. The early years of your training were some of the most fun times Kaeya had- thinking about it always made him smile. Both of you were known from the beginning as rule benders, mostly breakers, within the Knights and if it weren’t for the influence of Kaeyas adoptive family none of you both would’ve gotten that many chances to stay until each of you proved their own worth without familiar ties.

However, in the last few years you both grew a bit more distant. Kaeya blamed himself entirely for it, after Crepus death he knew he should not have any emotional ties to anyone in Mondstadt, at first he ruined the relationship with his brother by telling him the truth. He then just tried to avoid you more and more, which wasn’t easy, because after Diluc quit his position as a Cavalry Captain Kaeya rose up to his position – only to have you as his subordinate.

It was not until you were on a mission with Kaeya that went horribly wrong, that Kaeya realised his feelings for you never were platonic, he was in love with you since the early days of training.You are his first love.

That mission was more of a secretive one, a few months after Diluc had left Mond and Crepus died, and one of the first bigger outings Kaeya had to lead as a Cavalry Captain. And the first mission without his brother by his side. The dragon Ursa resurfaced and continued to cause harm to the people of Mond, so Grand Master Varka gave Kaeya the responsibility to find that Dragons lair.

Instead of finding the hiding spot of Ursa, Kaeyas troop stumbled into a hiding spot of the, at that point not known as, Abyss order. That was the last time Kaeya went into a mission without information he himself collected and checked, because looking back it was so obviously a trap. How did he not notice it back then?

The fight was brutal and exhausting – somehow it was a miracle that the only Knight dangerously wounded was you. At least that is what the other Knights who were on that mission too would say, thankful that the worst they had to suffer from back then were a few scars at most. Hearing anyone talk about it enraged Kaeya, though he would never show it. It was because you were the most skilled fighter in that troop, even without a Vision Kaeya was sure that at your peak back then you could’ve bested him even now. But because of one of his mistakes, he did not care to watch his own back, maybe because he knew you would protect him, it was you who was injured and not him.

In that moment, seeing you unconscious on the floor laying in your own blood because you protected him, Kaeya understood his feelings for you.

After bringing you back safely to Mondstadt, and you thankfully not dying because of the injuries, Kaeya became even more distant. At first he wished to be able to tell you his true feelings after you’ve woken up, but he just couldn’t. When the healers and doctors gave the news that the injury was so severe that you would never be able to fight again, or even walk down the streets of Mond without being in pain – Kaeya thought the guilt of keeping that secret from Diluc and Crepus for years was unbearable, but the guilt he felt from being responsible for this? It pained him even more.

You stayed in the Knights, taking over administrative tasks and helping every other department of the Knights in the best ways you possibly could.

What surprised Kaeya is that you were never bitter about it. You never said it was Kaeyas fault, even went out of your way to constantly reassure him after you got the news that he shouldn’t blame himself for it (until this day he refuses to listen to you). Your smile and laughter didn’t stop after it, which he never could understand.

How were you able to be so happy and kind when your dream of leading your own troop just – vanished. To travel around Teyvat, see the world. When you weren’t able to do the things, you loved on your own, like going to Windrise to pick some of your favourite flowers.

Somehow, Kaeya thought, it was because of that guy. He never liked your boyfriend to begin with, but Kaeya thought maybe it was his jealousy that clouded his judgement.

He came into your life shortly after the incident and Kaeya remembered the first time he saw you two together – holding hands, you looked so smitten and the way you laughed when he leaned down to whisper something into your ear. After seeing that Kaeya knew he could never have something like this in his life. Not if its not with you.

Kaeya didn’t spend much time with you outside of the Knights anymore, though he would always have a conversation with you when you came up to him or he had to visit your office. Whenever he saw you outside of the Knights, you were always with your boyfriend, sometimes stopping and having a quick chat with Kaeya. Sometimes he wished you would stop being so nice to him.

Now seeing that disgusting piece of shit of a boyfriend sit in the corner of the Angel’s Share, with his hands all over some young thing made Kaeyas blood boil.

How dared he, the man who should be so lucky to have you, have his eyes and hands on another woman.

Also it’s a good thing that Diluc is not at Angel’s Share today, he was also a close friend of you back in the day and even though the friendship with Diluc didn’t survive his three years absence, Diluc would definitely throw that bastard out

Kaeya was astounded by the audacity your boyfriend had. He never had a high opinion of him but seeing that man openly flirt and make out with a woman that was not you, so obvious for everyone to see… in a bar that was frequently visited by your colleagues and friends. If it weren’t for the fact that he was cheating on you Kaeya could maybe muster up some respect for a man who had so clearly a death wish. Eyeing him from the corner of his eye, Kaeya kept observing that situation. How the hands that always held yours in public were touching all over the body of that unknown woman. How the mouth that told you sweet nothings over and over, told you that he loved you, was occupied with kissing the neck of another woman. That whole display just filled Kaeya with disgust. The loud giggles of that woman in his lap filled the Tavern and that was the moment Kaeya decided he had enough. Calmy, he finished his drink, stood up from the bar and made his way over to the table. “You surely don’t mind if I join you two”, Kaeya said in a nonchalant manner, sitting down opposite to the couple. “Oh, Sir Kaeya!”, the young woman giggled, clearly intoxicated, and embarrassed by the way Kaeya eyed the two. Quickly they both shifted, so the woman sat now besides your boyfriend. The way the cheater looked at Kaeya, it was quite amusing. A mix of fear, shock and uneasiness filled the eyes of him. It filled Kaeya with a weird sense of pride, knowing that being caught by him was something that scared him. “Seemed like you two had quite some fun back here”, Kaeya smugly started his interrogation. It was not unusual for Kaeya to use the Angel’s Share as his interrogation room – the casual setting and the alcohol made it so much easier sometimes for people to spill all their secrets. Especially when Kaeya could just be so charming. What Kaeya interested the most was if this was the first offense of the cheater or if that behaviour was a more… regular occurrence. It was at least for him the first time he caught that man red handed. Getting some information out of the girl was quite easy, she was so eager to tell the Cavalry Captain all about the two. Though from what Kaeya gathered the whole thing between her and your boyfriend was quite fresh. “You two really seem like a fitting pair”, Kaeya replied after a long ramble of that woman on how she was just so in love with your boyfriend. His voice sweet and smooth as silk, not showing how the anger inside him grew. It was just not fair, not fair to you. “Hey,” Kaeya began and eyed the empty glasses on the table, looking then back at the woman. “How about another round of drinks, it’s on me. Would you be so kind and go to Charles and order a few?”, again his voice was charming as ever. “No, no, Sir Kaeya, that’s too kind, but another drink won’t be necessary. It is quite late; don’t you think flower? We should get going”, the cheater chimed in and Kaeya nearly lost his cool when he heard him call the woman ‘flower’. Whenever Kaeya met you and him on his patrols around Mondstadt he always heard him call you ‘flower’. Fucking bastard, is all Kaeya could think before the voice of the woman protested the cheaters concerns. “Nooo, just one more round. How can you turn down Sir Kaeya, love? Just one more, please”, she looked at him with pleading eyes and he just sighted. “Fine”, he said and with that the woman was on her way to the bar. Kaeya now hoped that Charles would keep her occupied long enough so he could find out everything he wants to know from that cheater. His eye shifted from the woman who made her way to the bar to your boyfriend who sat directly across Kaeya. Now completely alone and vulnerable, for his shield left his side. The tension in the air seemed to be unbearable, Kaeya could see how uncomfortable the silence and his curious glance made the cheater. But Kaeya knew – sometimes saying nothing says it all. Helplessly your boyfriend looked over to the bar only to see that the woman he was with was now totally engrossed in a conversation with Charles. After a few minutes, that might have felt like hours to that cheater, he broke the silence. “So,” he tried to start a conversation, clearly not knowing that he fell right into Kaeyas trap. “What gives us the honour to be invited by the Cavalry Captain?”. “Oh, I think you might be smart enough to come up with an answer yourself,” Kaeya replied, keeping up a smile. Though the look in Kaeyas eye was just as cold as the top of Dragonspine, causing the other man to shiver. “As much as it honours me that you think of me this highly, I sadly have no idea what would make the renowned Sir Kaeya sit down at my table tonight.” “Oh, so this is how you want have this conversation”, now his voice was just as cold as his look. “I don’t understand what you mean.” ‘Bullshit’, Kaeya thought. “I’ve been just curious about that woman that just sat so prominently on your lap earlier this evening, she seems to be not the same I saw you hold hands with earlier this day.” “As nice at it is that the Cavalry Captain seems concerned for me, it isn’t one of the Knights duties to pry into the lives of citizens, now, is it?” Oh, how confident the cheater now sounded, thinking he was winning that conversation. Kaeya couldn’t deny that the entire situation made him furious and that he handled it a bit differently than he usually would if he were to talk with drunk treasure hoarders. “Oh, we’re awfully bold now, are we? Believe me the Knights don’t care about your infidelity, though I guess a certain one might find it awfully interesting to know how you spend your nights.” There was a short moment of silences between the two men, the tension just rising. “Well, they wouldn’t believe you. But if you want to go and be a telltale go, I won’t stop you”, the man gave as an answer. His words did not fit his body language – bold words, but his body was tense and Kaeya could see the fear behind the eyes of the man. But it was not fear of losing you, no he seemed to be quite confident that this would not happen. Kaeya said nothing, he just looked at that man, piercing him with his ice cold look. “You see”, he continued, “I wouldn’t be sitting here in Angle’s Share with that lovely company if I thought they might believe the words of any low-rank Knight coming in their office, believing their lies. Quite sad what pranks some people want to play on them, don’t you think?” Slowly, but surely, Kaeya understood that this tonight was definitely not the first offense of that man. And he now understood why most of the Knights here tonight just looked away from the scene, not batting an eye at what was going on. Kaeya could kick himself in the ass, how did he not notice the behaviour of that rodent before him earlier? If he was so open about cheating on you that even most of the other Knights knew, how come that he did not? “And I think its just so sad, that one of the people they hold in such high regards would join in on those baseless accusations, don’t you think Sir Kaeya? I mean it would be so disappointing for them to find out that you tell them such a lie, only because you just don’t like me.” If Kaeya wasn’t a Knight, if he weren’t Kaeya right now, if he hadn’t to uphold a certain image… the floor of the Tavern would be painted with the blood of this absolute bastard. Oh, how Kaeya wished he could lose his cool. “If you say it like that, then I guess I won’t tell them a word,” Kaeya replied. “I’m glad you understand”, the cheater smiled, the fear in his eyes now subsided and he seemed to relax a bit. At that Kaeya just leaned forward, his look cold and his voice even colder. “You are telling them.” The man just scoffed, looking confused at Kaeya. “Why should I?” Kaeya now coming closer, his voice more threatening than before. “Do you really want to find out, if you don’t?”. Kaeya leaned back, smiling and at that moment the woman came back with the drinks. The face of the man was just pale as snow, the fear back in his eyes. “Oh, thank you dear”, Kaeya said when she places his drink before him, and he took a sip. If your boyfriend is smarter than he seemed to be after fooling around with that woman in public, it would do him good to do as Kaeya said.

Dealing with the pain in your leg was something you were used to now for a few years, but the pain in your heart today… you somehow would prefer a broken leg over your shattered heart. Your eyes were fixated on the documents before you, though trough the tears in your eyes you could barley make out what they said. What they were even for. How could you ignore it for so long, that he cheated. That he fooled around with any woman in Mondstadt willing to be with him. This sleezy asshole. The tears fell down on the paper, you couldn’t care right now what important piece of documents you ruined with your tears. How, how, how??? Why were you so stupid to believe him when he always said that all the people that came to you with their concerns must have been mistaken. Why did you believe him over and over again. You couldn’t stop thinking about how the first person coming to you was Outrider Amber, so nervous to even say anything. How you just laughed her worries away, saying she definitely was mistaken. How after Amber again and again told you how sure she was. Had you just listened to her. Then maybe you wouldn’t feel so humiliated. If you just hadn’t listened to that damn liar. In that moment you heard a knock on the door. Quickly you wiped your tears away with your sleeves, clearing your throat. “Come in,” you said, though you were shocked at how hoarse you sounded. Stepping into your office was Kaeya, but when he saw your red eyes and tear stained face, he quickly closed the door behind him. “Are you alright?”, he asked in such a soft and kind voice. Since you woke up in the infirmary all those years ago you hadn’t heard him talk in that voice. You couldn’t help it, it made you immediately tear up again. Throwing your head into your hands you just couldn’t stop the uncontrollably sobs that took over you. You didn’t even notice that Kaeya was kneeling beside your chair until he felt his hand on your back. “Hey,” you heard him say, again in this soft voice. “It’s alright, let it out.” And you did. For a while you just sat there, crying and sobbing until you ran empty. The whole time Kaeya was on your side, saying nothing. He was just there and somehow, even after you two grew apart in the past years, after all that happened – Crepus death, Dilucs disappearance and return, your injury. Even after all it did not feel awkward to just cry and look for comfort at his side. After all, you still were friends. Slowly you calmed down, looking up to him. “I was so stupid, Kaeya. So many people came to me, told me what they saw, who he was and I- I just ignored it. I ignored it all, my feelings and-“, you felt the lump in your throat, making you stop speaking. It was just too much. “You’re not stupid,” he said, taking you in his arms. It felt so good to just melt into the hug. Just trying to forget the pain for a few seconds, slipping back into the familiarity of Kaeya you haven’t felt in such a long time.

Kaeya on the other hand couldn’t stop asking himself if what he’s doing here was alright. Was it okay to comfort you, he asked. If he hadn’t basically threatened your, obviously now, ex-boyfriend last night to tell you the truth, he might have been met with your bright smile today and not that painful expression. But it was the right thing to do, you deserved to know. You deserved for that guy to tell you, although he should have told you the truth out of his own free will. Not because Kaeya got involved. “Thank you”, he heard you mumble into his chest. “For what?” he asked, both of you now parting from the hug. “For just… for being here. And for being a friend”, you answered, again wiping tears away. Kaeya couldn’t help himself and chuckled at that statement. A friend, yeah. That is what he was and what he must be fine with. However, he didn’t really expect you to view him as one, after all that happened and how much he tried to avoid you in the past. “Well, I have been an awful friend the last years, haven’t I?”. Your eyes shot up, looking directly into his eye. “No, what makes you think that?”. You genuinely looked surprised at his statement. “Well,” he gestured towards your leg. Before he could even say anything, he felt your hands cup his face and looking at him sternly. “Kaeya Alberich, how often do I have to tell you this. What happened to my leg is not your fault, please stop taking blame for it. It was my choice to join you on that mission.” For a short while you both just looked into each other’s eyes until Kaeya couldn’t stand it anymore, a sigh leaving him, and he looked away. “How come that I want to comfort you and you just end up telling me something I just can’t seem to learn.” He stood up and then he saw it. You smiled at him. A sad smile, but a smile, nonetheless. “One day you’ll hopefully learn it”, you said. “Now, to make up for this”, pointing at your leg, trying to joke, “and for threatening a Mondstadt citizen, I think you should get me something from Good Hunter.” Kaeya was surprised. How did you know? He couldn’t even ask you, you already gave him the answer to the question that was so clearly written all over his face. “He literally begged me, after telling me the truth and breaking up with me, that I made sure you wouldn’t hurt him.” Now Kaeya gave out a small laugh, partially because he felt a bit embarrassed by you knowing, but also the thought of that arrogant asshole being so afraid of him amused Kaeya. “And, what did you tell him”, he asked, now back with his more playful tone. “Mmmmmh, I told him I’ll think about it.”

#genshin impact fan fiction #genshin #genshin fan fiction #kaeya x reader #kaeya fanfiction #genshin angst #kaeya angst #genshin hurt #genshin comfort #how do you tag fan fiction help #reader insert #gender-neutral reader #genshin impact x reader #genshin impact #genshin x reader #angst #hurt #comfort #kaeya alberich

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meteorologears · 2 years ago

Note

Someone sent c22 already so I'll give you a couple for the other two

Girlverse Clevbar for the ships :}

And for the character- Couture 17 tamiz (do ocs count? They should 😋)

Omg hiiii aud!!!!! Thanks for the ask !! :D

002 | Send me a ship and I will tell you:

When I started shipping them: The 25th of May 2022 at approximately 7:16 in the morning

My thoughts: I like the regular universe in absolutes... however I do feel like there's more you can add to the characters in the girlverse. Example: Clevinger is the kind of guy to be big into social justice in the way that doesn't really help anyone, but it makes more sense to do it being part of at least one marginalized community--something that's not gained with regular book Clevinger. It's almost more introspective than the fast-paced c22 humour even though it's still in the same vein.

What makes me happy about them: Something something the inherent homoeroticism of being the only person who can stand the other person for long periods of time. In all seriousness, I appreciate the consistent banter and the enjoyment of having the other person around. Dunbar gets longer days. Clevinger gets entertaining arguments. There's something for each of them.

What makes me sad about them: In canon, it's a short-lived relationship. They die, or at least one of them dies, or there's something that cuts off the relationship before either of them is ready. Actually, it feeds more into their individual themes as characters; Dunbar is resigned to her own death but doesn't seem to take into account the effects of other's deaths on her.

Things done in fanfic that annoys me: Lol I do think only 3 people (including myself) have written fanfic about regular clevinger/dunbar let alone the girlverse version (just me). I don't think they communicate particularly well, which I write in even though it annoys me (I write it anyway because it's accurate. Whatever. I'll just have to suffer). Or when I make a philosophy allusion, post the fanfic, read 2 books about that philosophy, and find inconsistencies in my wording/phrasing. That, too.

Things I look for in fanfic: I look for fanfic!! It would be incredibly cool to me if someone else ever wrote this niche and hyperspecific thing and I'd be insane about it.

My wishlist: Hmmm this is tough. I think Heller should've written them interacting at least one other time before they were written out. Otherwise just for more fanfic to exist that I didn't write, that'd be cool too :]

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: I've never given this much thought, actually. I think they're both nightmares in their own respect, but given that Yossarian is friends with both of them, he might be able to tolerate that.

My happily ever after for them: Either they go to Hell together in the ClosingTimeverse and spend eternity like that OR neither of them is actually dead but someone has amnesia/something else that makes rekindling after several years difficult. Clevinger gets tenured and no less insufferable. Dunbar picks up a boring hobby and works a boring job and gets some passion for something in her life. They adopt a kid. It's not happy exactly, but it's where they ought to be.

003 | Give me a character & I will tell you:

[for those wondering, this one of my characters from my original novel, 17 Tamiz (An all-too familiar tale of arcadia descending) that you can read here.]

How I feel about this character: She's entertaining to me to write. She's an interesting case because she's the only non-chapter character who's still a main character, and her story is only told in letters she's written as an epilogue. She's interesting to me too, mainly because she never means what she says and never says anything she means, even though she always has other's best interests at heart.

Any/all the people I ship romantically with this character: Eloise Rosales

My favorite non-romantic relationship for this character: Tex Knapp. Eldringhoff is a close second.

My unpopular opinion about this character: She's more of a rule-follower than her romantic interest and narrative foil, Rosales.

One thing I wish would happen / had happened with this character in canon: One thing I wish would happen but I will not write is for her to have a happy ending. I wish she would dial it back before disappearing forcibly--however, doing so would take away the tragedy that she inherently represents. To get caught in a whirlwind and destroy yourself--why, I'd say that's human. :(

Favorite friendship for this character: Probably Tex Knapp too. They are best friends.

My crossover ship: Haha I have no idea!!

#hi aud :) !!!!!#this got lengthy (too many opinions syndrome) so--#long post #c22 #radio show host #17 Tamiz #catchllection

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sincerelytan · 3 years ago

Text

Girlfriend V / S Bestfriend

Girlfriend v / s Bestfriend

Word count: 4245

Prompt: “Free Day” Day 7 of Digiweek 2021

Features Characters: Yamato, Mimi, Taichi, Sora, Takeru, Kari, Koshiro and Joe

A / N: I had written this a while back and thought I would post it during day 7 of free day. Hope you enjoy my attempt at this little humours fic.

Also Today is August 1st - Happy Odaiba Day

@digiweek

Summary: Yamato finds himself in between yet another argument of Taichi and Mimi, but this time Sora has a solution that just might solve the age old question or just make things more awkward for Yamato

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“I hope we are not too late,” Sora commented as she, Yamato and Takeru were making their way to Taichi’s house.

“We are very late,” Yamato replied blandly.

“We would have been on time if you hadn’t taken so much time in picking out a gift for your girlfriend,” Sora shot back caustically. “besides, you asked us for our help.” she further pointed out.

“She’s right you know,” Takeru added; “who knew you would take so much time!” he muttered “in choosing a dress,” last part almost to himself.

“Yeah, whatever,” Yamato said rolling his eyes, clearly having heard what Takeru said.

“Thanks for helping though,” Yamato murmured after a bit of walking in silence. “I really want this date to be special.” And Takeru; Yamato said halting and turning towards his brother, “She better not find out about this surprise.” Yamato commanded Takeru in a playful warning tone, remembering how Takeru had a habit of confiding in her in just about anything and everything.

“My lips are sealed!” Takeru said enthusiastically. “Relax, she will love it! I’m sure, besides your anniversary is next week! He said beaming at a nervous Yamato.

Sensing Yamato still needed some assurance, Takeru added, “You got the black dress, the necklace, you booked the table at Il Ristorante - Luca Fantin,” he stopped and looked at Yamato, “You booked it right?”

“Yes, of course, a month ago” Yamato added.

“And we got the limo, I know because I booked that one, Sora’s going to give you the flowers in the morning” Takeru added counting down the list on his fingers, “We have the perfect coverup story so now,” he continued as they reached Taichi’s house “let’s just hang out with the others and not let her suspect anything.” He said beaming to a somewhat confident Yamato.

Great, poker face, Yamato thought as they rang the bell to Taichi’s door.

When they arrived at Taichi’s all 3 of them were revising their excuse as to why they turned up together and that too late. The excuse was going to be that Yamato and Takeru were held back by their mum and on the way to Taichi’s place they bumped into Sora who was going to say she came from her tennis class that was near Takeru’s place and thus they ended upcoming together.

As it turned out they didn’t really have to worry about their excuses because they could hear Taichi and Mimi arguing while they waited outside for someone to open the door.

“What’s the argument about this time?” Sora asked as Joe opened the door.

“You wouldn’t believe me even if I told you” Joe sighted back rubbing his forehead.

“Are they finally here?” Kari called out from the room.

“Yeah,” Joe shouted back.

“Tell them to come here and end this now.” they heard Koshiro say clearly sounding annoyed.

“We have been friends forever.” They could hear Taichi claim loudly at Mimi.

“So have we! and we’ve been dating for 3 years now.” Mimi shot back.

“Ha please, you’ll didn’t even talk with each other during elementary school.” Taichi declared assuming his victory.

“So what! I know things that you would never ever know,” Mimi replied back with a smirk, “I am the one that sleeps with him.”

Yamato blushed bright red overhearing this conversation as he, Takeru, and Sora entered the room.

“Are you two fighting; over who knows Yamato better?” Sora asked with amusement.

“Obviously I do!” Mimi smiled as she approached Yamato and gave him a quick kiss.

“Kissing someone doesn’t necessarily mean you know them,” Taichi said shrugging his shoulders. “I kissed Catherine a couple of times; didn’t know she already had a boyfriend.”

“That’s because all you guys did was kiss,” Sora commented back dryly.

“Touché!” Taichi smirked at the guys as Sora and Kari shook their heads.

“Anyway,” Yamato said butting in “I guess I would say, Mimi does know me better than you, sorry Taichi.”

“That’s my man,” Mimi said happily sending an air kiss in Yamato’s direction.

“Whipped” Taichi smirked as he received a glare from Yamato.

“Anyway, I know you are just saying this because you want to continue sleeping with her.” Taichi continued now rolling his eyes at Yamato. “and you know I am right, thus further proving my point that I know him better,” Taichi concluded with his hands gesturing and looking at everyone to agree with him.

As Yamato opened his mouth to argue back, “A quiz!” Sora chimed in quickly.

“I will ask both of you’ll a few questions about Yamato, and whoever answers most of them correctly is the winner.” Sora continued excitedly as Yamato, Mimi and Taichi looked at her with confusion.

“That’s a good idea but obviously Yamato will agree with Mimi and cheat,” Taichi said shooting a look at Mimi.

Before Mimi could argue back to that, “Written cards” Koshiro butted in. “Sora can ask the question, all 3 of you’ll get a card to write the answers and then everyone can reveal the answers that they wrote at the same time, so no one can cheat,” Koshiro explained.

“You can’t be serious!” Yamato said facepalming while Taichi and Mimi were giving it a serious thought.

“This is a great idea” Takeru chimed. “Although technically I am supposed to know him better than both of you’ll.” He said pointing at Mimi and Taichi, “but this way I will find out things I don’t know about you” he added with excitement.

“This is going to be so much fun” Sora smirked with gleaming eyes as she looked directly at Yamato.

“I’m sorry Yamato”, Joe added sympathetically patting Yamato on his shoulder.

While the others prepared the questions, Yamato, Taichi and Mimi waited in the other room.

“Better game up Tachikawa,” Taichi said stretching his neck, getting his game mode on.

“You’re going down Yagami,” Mimi said narrowing her eyes at Taichi.

“Oh Boy!” is all Yamato could mutter.

“Okay, we are ready,” Kari giggled as Taichi, Yamato, and Mimi entered the room.

“Please sit at your assigned seats,” Joe said, pointing to the chairs that had each of their names, a bunch of empty cards, and a marker for them to write with. “This way no one can cheat,” he said as Yamato, Mimi, and Taichi took their seats.

“Rules are simple,” Koshiro continued, “Sora will host, asking you’ll questions about Yamato, you get 10 seconds to write your answers on the cards and when asked you will reveal what you have written after which Yamato reveals his answer, Kari keeps score, and we can see which one of you’ll knows Yamato best.” He finished taking his seat near Joe and Takeru as Sora stood in front of the three participants.

“Welcome to the game of Girlfriend v/s Best friend; a game where Mimi, the girlfriend, and Taichi, the best friend or is it the other way around?” Sora spoke commanding everyone’s attention as she began the game joyfully in her best host voice.

“Anyway, where both will try and answer some questions about Yamato. The person with the most correct answers wins the game and proves to the other that they do indeed know Yamato better.” She continued gleefully.

“Okay, let’s do this!” Mimi said with a determined look on her face.

“Bring it on!” Taichi answered equally determinedly.

“You all are enjoying this way too much,” Yamato said annoyed.

“You have no idea,” Sora replied giggling.

“Starting off with an easy Question, Question 1 for girlfriend vs best friend is What colour M&Ms are Yamato’s favourite?” Sora asked grinning at the three.

As soon as Sora finished asking the question Mimi, Taichi, and Yamato quickly wrote down their answers as Koshiro timed them.

And “Mimi” Sora said pointing at Mimi as Koshiro gave her the nod indicating the time was up.

Blue – Mimi’s card read. “He always snatches up the blue ones while I go for the red ones.” She said smiling broadly.

Blue – Taichi’s card also read “this is too easy.” He said lazily.

“And now for the reveal, Yamato?” Sora asked turning to Yamato.

Yamato sighed and held up his card, where it was written Blue, “remind me why I agreed to this again?” he asked in a defeated tone.

“Because it’s fun and we get to take your case,” Sora said with a bright smile. “Also, I get my revenge on you for dragging me through 20 different shops” She added the last part softly to Yamato while Mimi and Taichi were busy taunting each other. “A point to both Mimi and Taichi” She concluded loudly pointing at Kari who giving a thumbs up and wrote down the score on the board.

“After an easy start moving on to Question 2!” Sora continued with the same enthusiasm; What is Yamato’s favourite food?”

As before all 3 of them wrote down the answer as soon as Sora asked the question and Koshiro began his timer. With a nod from Koshiro, Sora asked Taichi and Mimi to reveal their answers.

Pizza – Taichi’s card read. “obviously” he muttered while showing his card.

Onigiri/Mochi – Mimi’s card read “I know this because I cook for him.” She answered giving Yamato a sweet but dangerous look indicating his answer better be this.

Onigiri – Yamato’s card read. “I like pizza and mochi as well,” Yamato said looking at Taichi apologetically, while Mimi gave him one of her widest smiles.

“Oo bad luck Taichi, looks like Yamato’s favourite food is Onigiri.” Sora concluded in her host voice. “and that’s a point to Mimi." She said pointing at Kari who put another point up for Mimi.

“Whose favourite food is not Pizza!” Taichi said out loud and annoyed as he threw his answer card down.

“We all like pizza but you have an unhealthy obsession with it Taichi,” Kari said sighing. “Seriously I once saw him finish 2 large pizza’s in 1 go,” she added looking at the group.

“Hey, those pizzas were to die for,” Taichi said defending his love for pizza.

“Oh, is it the place you insisted we go for my birthday?” Koshiro asked. “Oh yeah, those pizzas were really good” he agreed, much to Taichi’s delight.

“The very same” Taichi answered happy that Koshiro was there to back him up.

“Which reminds me, we should order some food for later,” Joe said taking out his phone to place an order. “Any suggestions?” he asked looking around.

“Pizza” Taichi answered before anyone else could. “And Yamato my Pizza is on you for not answering pizza.”

“And mine too” Mimi added. I agree with Taichi on this, she giggled much to Taichi’s delight.

“Wait, What! But Onigiri? Fine!.” Yamato said just throwing his hands up and giving up.

“Hey, I am the host, my Pizza is on you as well,” Sora added to the mix.

“I keep the score” Kari chimed in.

“and I time you guys,” Koshiro added.

“and I am your brother,” Takeru said giving his best puppy dog face.

“you guys torture me like this and expect the pizza to be on me?” “Some friends you are!” Yamato started protesting.

“Pizza is on me and Yamato,” Joe said giving Yamato an apologetic look as Yamato put his hands on his face in annoyance.

“As Joe orders the Pizza, we move on to Question 3, What is Yamato’s preferred pizza topping?” Sora continued in her host mode.

“Was that question on the list?” Koshiro asked giving Sora a confused look.

“Well, I just thought of it” she added. “come on guys it’s a relevant question!”

Alright, muttered the three as they wrote down their answers.

“And for the reveal,” Sora said pointing towards her best friend, “Mimi”

Double Cheese – Mimi’s card read. “Yamato really loves cheese”

Double Cheese – Taichi’s card read as well; “you better not answer anything else, our friendship is literally at stake now” Taichi said dramatically.

Double Cheese – Yamato’s card read, “you know it” Yamato exclaimed as Taichi grinned chanting, “Our friendship is saved.”

“Mimi leading by a point, we move on to Question 4,” Sora said laughing at the exchange. “Which is Yamato’s favourite band?”

“And answers,” she said as she got the nod from Koshiro.

Mimi and Taichi held up their cards at the same time

Nirvana – Mimi’s card read, “Yamato absolutely loves them, he also likes Linkin Park though.”

Nirvana – Taichi’s card also read. “Yeah, I remember this from elementary school.” He said shooting a look at Mimi.

Nirvana – Yamato’s card also read. “I think everyone knows this.”

“Apparently they do, adding a point each to Mimi and Taichi.” Sora concluded.

“For Question 5” Sora continued; “Which sport does Yamato least suck at?”

“Thanks for putting it that way,” Yamato said rolling his eyes at Sora.

“My pleasure, and Mimi?” Sora smirked, clearly enjoying her role as the hostess.

Basketball – Mimi’s card read “He loses against Takeru every time,” she said earning a grin from Takeru and a very annoyed “hey” from Yamato.

“Taichi?”

Basketball – Taichi’s card also read. “He really sucks at soccer.” Earning a further “hey!” from Yamato.

“I can beat every one of your asses in Basketball,” Yamato stated as he showed his card that read Basketball.

“and yet somehow you always lose to me”

“Shut up Takeru.” Yamato glared at Takeru as everyone laughed.

“Moving on to Question 6,” Sora continued. “What is Yamato’s favourite guilt trip series to binge?”

Doctor who – Taichi’s card read when Sora called out his name to reveal his answer. “I don’t know why but he loves that show.”

Glee – Mimi’s card read next.

“Mimi that’s your favourite guilt trip series, not mine” Yamato said, showing his card that read – Doctor who.

“but you always watch glee with me” Mimi pouted.

“yes, because you enjoy it, I watch it with you,” Yamato said smiling at her, at which she further pouted.

“Looks like Taichi knows Yamato’s Tv preference here better than Mimi” Sora concluded. “With a point to Taichi, he is now caught up with Mimi.”

“And for Question 7,” Sora continued in her best hostess impression. “If Yamato could have anyone’s superpowers from the Avengers team, who’s powers would he want to have?”

“Great question!” Kari said looking at Koshiro, who had suggested the question. Blushing at Kari’s comment, Koshiro nodded to Sora as the time ended.

“Mimi? Your answer please” Sora asked her friend.

Captain America – Mimi’s card read as she looked at Yamato with a dreamy expression.

“Oo Captain America, that would be a hot choice,” Sora giggled. “Taichi?”

Iron Man – Taichi’s card read. “Please, Yamato is more like Tony Stark, also he’s the coolest.

Thor – Yamato’s card read. As everyone gave him a bland expression. “What?” he added.

“Seriously? I thought you like Captain America, you have a keychain of his shield” Mimi squealed, somehow offended, “also he’s the hottest! and you definitely have the Ass, perhaps not America’s but definitely Japan’s Ass.” Mimi added winking to a very red Yamato.

“Hmm I don’t know, maybe; Yamato, give us a twirl now, will you?” Taichi said trying to check out Yamato.

“And deleting that image from my mind,” Takeru said making a face at Yamato.

“Yeah, but I would prefer Thor’s powers, I could fly and manipulate thunder and also not to mention I would be a God.” Yamato tried defending his answer.

“Okay, no points for anyone, looks like you guys need to buck up your game, if you wanna win who knows Japan’s Ass better,” Sora concluded laughing.

“Shudd up.” Is all Yamato could say red in his face as everyone laughed.

“Moving on to DC, Question 8!” Sora continued as the laughter died down. “Who is Yamato’s all-time favourite DC character?”

“I actually like DC more than Marvel” Takeru added to the room.

“Nah aa, marvel all the way” Kari shot back at Takeru. “They have better movies”

“Please, who can compete against Batman?” Takeru chimed in.

“Have you read any of the comics?” Koshiro asked them both.

“some” Takeru mumbled while Kari shook her head.

“And before this gets into a Marvel vs Dc or TV vs Comics, answers please!” Sora slipped in halting that discussion.

Batman – Taichi’s card read. “obviously”

Nightwing – Mimi’s card read. “This time it’s definitely the butt," she added with a squeal.

Nightwing – Yamato’s card read. “It's not because of the ass” Yamato added to a gleaming Mimi.

“Okay, seriously Yamato, you have got to give us a twirl!” Taichi exclaimed.

All Yamato could do was glare at Taichi as the girls giggled and the boys laughed.

“We are just getting started on to the good questions” Sora added cheekily as the laughter subsided. “Moving on to the next question! Question 9” “What age did Yamato have his first kiss?”

Yamato and Mimi both blushed hiding their faces behind their cards as they wrote the answer.

“And Mimi?” Sora asked

13 – Mimi’s card read

16 – Taichi’s card read. “He was a late bloomer” Taichi teased

13 – Yamato’s card read as he held it up to cover his face.

“13? Really? Who?” Sora asked surprised, asking the question that was on everyone’s mind as Yamato was extremely closed off as a person that time.

“Mimi,” Yamato answered slowly “the day she was leaving for the states”

“But you guys weren’t together that time,” Koshiro asked. “or were you already secretly dating”

“Well, it was unexpected for me as well, I mean I did have a crush on him that time but didn’t think he had, so imagine my surprise when I went to tell him goodbye, he kissed me.” Mimi smiled at the memory, “And he’s really improved a lot since then in that department” she added in a teasing tone.

“I knew I saw the two of you kiss, you told me I was seeing things,” Takeru exclaimed at Yamato.

“I didn’t really want anyone to know,” Yamato said apologetically to Takeru.

“Those mood swings make so much more sense now” Takeru added laughing.

“Okay, moving on” Yamato gestured to a smiling Sora.

“This game is just getting started,” Sora said amused at Yamato’s embarrassment.

“I am going to kill all of you,” Yamato replied pointing towards Sora and the other spectators.

“Kari, would you tell us the score please,” Sora said sticking out her tongue at Yamato.

“Taichi needs to game up, as Mimi is leading by 2 points.” Kari added with a giggle.

“Revealing more secrets of the lone wolf, moving on to Question 10” Sora smiled “What is Yamato’s favourite alcoholic beverage?

Even before sora could ask for an answer,

Beer – Taichi’s card read. “phh please” he added with an air of confidence.

Old Fashioned – Mimi’s card read. Please, Yamato likes his classic gentleman’s whiskey drink”

Old Fashioned – Yamato’s card read.

“What old fashion? Are you kidding me!!!! We always drink beer together” Taichi bellowed.

“But I like a good whiskey, bourbon, or scotch.” Yamato tried to defend himself.

“And you don’t like the beers we drink together?” Taichi asked absolutely furious.

“Yeah, of course I like beers but that’s not my favourite alcoholic beverage Taichi” Mat tried to explain.

“oh! So now beer isn’t sophisticated enough for you! First, you turn your back on Pizza and now Beer!” Taichi crossed his arms absolutely fuming.

“Taichi” Yamato tried to continue.

“Next boys’ night you get your own fancy-ass drink” Taichi pouted cutting Yamato off “Sora, next Question”

“Taichi” Yamato tried again.

“Next Question Sora”

Giving Yamato an apologetic look, Sora continued “Moving on to Question 11, What is Yamato the most afraid of?”

Ghosts – Taichi’s card red. “Remember the time when me, Takeru, and Mimi pranked Yamato” Taichi said laughing at the memory as they had spooked Yamato quite badly.

Ghosts – Mimi showed her card, smiling at the memory.

Ghosts – Yamato’s card read as well, cursing Takeru for revealing his secret.

“With Mimi still in the lead, Question 12” Sora continued with a knowing smirk towards Yamato. “Which celebrity is on Yamato’s list? Basically, which celebrity does Yamato wish to sleep with?” she further clarified.

Mariya Nishiuchi – Taichi held up his card excitedly

Merei Kiritani – Mimi held up her card with a stoic expression.

Mariya Nishiuchi – Yamato held his card, looking anywhere except at Mimi.

“oo she is pretty” Joe let slip to everyone’s amusement.

“Didn’t she come for one of your shows?” Takeru asked with an innocent curious look, while Mimi looked surprised, and Yamato tried to signal him to shut up.

“I don’t know what you are talking about” Yamato dismissed Takeru.

“Hang on!” Mimi added looking at Yamato now. “When was this? And how do I not know about this?”

“She came backstage as well” Takeru added. “I remember it was when you were in New York for your work visit,” Takeru said looking at Mimi.

“Mimi, I swear, nothing happened. She came to meet the band and that was it, I walked out of my dressing room when she came in”

“Okay this even I didn’t know,” Takeru said amused. “I just remember she came backstage to tell you guys she really enjoyed the show.”

“Are you telling me, you had the opportunity and you chickened out?” Taichi roared with laughter.

“Excuse me?” Mimi said tartly to Taichi.

“I didn’t chicken out Taichi, I didn’t want anything to do with her.” Yamato replied just as tartly.

“Not what you said when we were watching ..” Taichi continued in a teasing tone

“Shut up Taichi” Yamato cut Taichi off. “Mimi, babe, its not ..”

“We shall talk about this later,” Mimi said narrowing her eyes.

“Is this over yet?” Yamato asked to the room where the others were just giggling at his misery.

“no no, I want to see what else I don’t know about you.” Mimi replied in a teasing manner.

“Is it lets torture Yamato Day, today?” Yamato asked rhetorically.

“Mimi,” Joe asked cautiously, still not convinced of her mood, to which the ever bubbly girl just smiled and winked. Satisfied that Yamato won’t be in much trouble, Joe cleared his throat, “I think we have 3 more questions” to which Sora and Koshiro nodded.

The bell rung indicating the pizza was here. Joe and Yamato went to get the pizzas and pay for them, with Yamato insisting to pay for the whole thing and Joe politely but sternly telling him that they can split it amongst both of them.

Handing everyone their food and beverages, as Yamato and Joe got back in their place, Sora continued the game.

“To continue on to Yamato’s torture, Question 13,” she asked, “What type of porn category does Yamato like?” in a very serious and calm voice.

Joe almost choked on his drink while Koshiro spat out his drink, as the remaining two roared with laughter.

“Taichi?” Sora asked barely able to contain her laugh,

Cheerleader – Taichi’s card read. “I remember the time when he used to fantasize about Mimi in her cheerleading outfit all the time. I don’t think he’s gotten over that.” Taichi said raising his eyebrows cheekily at Yamato and Mimi.

Threesome – Mimi’s card read. “Really? You used to fantasize about me back then?” she asked amused. “And here I thought you were dropping hints for a 3way.”

Cheerleader – Yamato’s card read. “That wasn’t a hint, Mimi. I told you it was a misunderstanding.” He said blushing furiously than he ever had.

“Shame,” Mimi said casually checking her nails, “I might have been game.” She added with a wink towards him.

Taichi nearly fell off his chair, while Koshiro did fall off his chair, his mouth open with shock.

“You lucky lucky son of a gun,” Taichi added to a blushing Yamato, with a slight hint of jealousy in his voice.

“Misunderstanding?” Sora asked trying to fish for the story, while Kari just laughed and Joe looked down embarrassed.

“Okay, too much information for me,” Takeru said clearing her throat. “Next question please,” he said gesturing towards Sora.

“So having that opportunity taken away from him, moving on to Question 14.” Sora continued still between her laughs. “What is Yamato’s safe word?”

Sora wiped the tears rolling down her cheeks and gestured for all of them to reveal their answers.

Orangutan – Taichi’s card read.

Orangutan – Mimi’s card also read.

Orangutan – Yamato’s card read as well.

Seeing the shocked look on everyone’s face, Mimi looked over to Taichi’s card and in a very loud pitch voice, almost shouting exclaimed, “What!!”

“What! No way, What! How do you even know that?” Mimi bellowed.

“Are you fucking kidding me right now?” Taichi laughed falling off his chair, as Yamato just stared at Taichi with total shock. “Dude we really are soulmates.” Taichi managed to say between laughs as he struggled to get off the floor.

“I’m done, you know what I am done. All the other questions are irrelevant now” Mimi dropped her cards, got up, and walked out the room.

“Mimi come back,” Taichi tried calling behind her. “Princess,” he called after her as he got up and ran behind her still laughing his head off at the coincidence.

Yamato just shook his head, covering his face with his hands, as the rest of the people in the room erupted in laughter that went on for quite a while.

#digimon #digiweek2021 #day7 #digimon adventure #taichi yagami #Mimi tachikawa #yamato ishida #mimato #Sora Takenouchi #my fic #august #fanfiction #Happy Odaiba Day

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meichenxi · 4 years ago

Text

*rant commencing*

ok guys let’s sit down and have a think about the way we talk to kids, particularly neurodivergent ones, and the weight it carries

the other day, I opened up to a friend about something really hurtful my best (and only) friend said to me when I was fifteen. It was a moment of emotional intimacy and the first time I had brought it up seven years later and, once again, I got laughed at and told I was too fucking sensitive

and ok maybe yeah I was a ridiculous child. I’m a ridiculous adult, that shouldn’t be surprising. But this hurt and hurt and hurt and I was trying to think about why this in particular and not anything else was so painful

so here’s the situation. at fifteen, like many smart kids, everyone thought the world was open to me. Ok I had no social skills to speak of and was ostracised by teachers and students and family, but I was an optimistic kid, and in a disaster of a home situation (involving kidnappings and court cases and running away and being out of school for a year and a brother starting drugs at 12 and living in a shelter and basically just a LOT) I was always the smiley helpful one. and apart from being defeated by very simple mechanisms like idk drawers or biscuit packets, I picked things up quickly. I took GCSEs early and extra and tutored others; I was a regional competitive swimmer in breaststroke and open water; I taught myself the flute and got into an international touring youth orchestra without lessons; I won a poetry competition for adults in primary school; I played competitive netball and was a long distance runner; I drew and sold my art; I wrote shitty novels and started making conlangs and was interviewed on bbc world about it; I loved performing and was invited to join a theatre company when I left school; and my biggest passion in the entire world apart from Tolkien was martial arts. And the best thing was for my parents - one of whom was disabled and didn’t work and the other who was a cleaner - is that I worked two paper rounds and tutored younger children and earned all of the money for it myself. blah blah blah. I was your mum’s friend’s kid.

well, I’m a disaster adult, so you can probably guess that none of that lasted for very long. and there are gazillions of people here with exactly the same story.

the point in question, though, was when I was fifteen and thinking about sixth form (the last two years of school in the UK) it was becoming clear alarmingly fast that you weren’t allowed to just keep doing everything you loved. at some point you had to make a choice.

but how could I give up swimming for music? Or music for languages? Or languages for athletics? Or athletics for theatre? or, actually, all of them but one???? how did people just know what they had to do with their lives? how did they choose?

the problem was, I said to my friend, I know I could do well at any of them, so how was I supposed to choose? (tactless and a stupid thing to say and also just not true but I was fifteen and simultaneously disgustingly cocky and cripplingly insecure) And he laughed and said, well, fuck you then.

oh noooo. poor meeeeeee. I’m so fucking good at things what do I dooooo

I haven’t stopped thinking about that comment for seven years. Every single time I think about wasting my potential, every time I can’t sleep because I’m terrified that I’m not being productive or useful and hating myself because I’m upset that I can’t do something right away and I know it’s a stupid thing to be upset about - I think about that comment. I’m lucky. It’s alright for some.

because, actually, being expected to know what to do with your life aged 15 is a fucking terrifying thing. we were kids at fifteen being told to make decisions as if we had all the facts, as if we weren’t also being blindfolded and spun around in circles until we couldn’t stand. Do you do what your parents say? what you think you want to do? what your teachers say? do you just stay in education even though it’s not for you because your dream is stupid, or because you don’t have a dream like everyone else seems to? are you supposed to have a dream?

*it’s NOT a stupid thing to worry about*

particularly when? well, when your entire self worth equates to the things that you output, the things that you do. so just for a moment, put yourself in the shoes of all of these wonderful, dazzling, damaged, crazy kids with big dreams and big hearts, kids that are struggling right now and kids that are our future, and imagine that you’ve been told since you were old enough to read or speak or walk that you’re just so very clever

isn’t it just wonderful how clever you are? isn’t it just great how we never need to worry about you? you’re such an easy child, it’s a blessing. always so considerate, so thoughtful, never making a fuss! isn’t it just fantastic how well you do in school? I can’t imagine what it must be like to have a child who went to all of those nasty parties. you’re so dedicated

raise your hand if you were only ever told you were good. raise your hand if you were never told you were kind.

so, what happens? you take a child, and you tell them for its entire childhood that they’re clever. You don’t tell them that they’re creative, or hard-working, or dedicated, or driven, or helpful. You let them know that it’s ok that they’re weird, because they’re going to be successful. what do you think parents say to their kid who’s crying because she has no friends and she doesn’t understand what the other children are thinking and why they would hurt each other like that? even good parents, the very best of them, say things like: you’re just more mature than they are. it doesn’t matter. keep your head down - you’ll show them.

your child, in the best case scenario, has access to her hyperfixation that makes the world big and bright and beautiful. she’s a bit weird, but it’s kind of cute. anyway, she’s good at it. and as long as she succeeds, conventionally, and you get to brag, then it’s ok that she’s a little bit unconventional.

and then things to break, just a little. and then, aged eleven, your child is having an asthma attack in the classroom because she got so anxious she couldn’t answer a maths question she couldn’t breathe. it’s ok, her parents tell her the next day. you’re just not good at maths - that’s alright. you don’t have to be good at everything

your child, because she’s perceptive, begins to realise that things don’t get better as you get older. people are just as cruel at 12 as they are at 7, and they’ll be just as cruel at 15. and then one day, as a bad joke because she doesn’t really understand humour, she writes a fake text to her dad from someone’s phone in legalese that actually has a secret code hidden it in that she knows her dad will crack right away because he’s brilliant. she thinks it’s hilarious. her father thinks he is being threatened, and spends the next week in meltdown, bedridden and burnt-out. and when she owns up, he turns and snaps at her, and says as if you could write something like that. an ADULT wrote this, not a fucking child

and suddenly, that cleverness they kept talking about? they don’t even understand that.

suddenly, no one sees her at all.

she needs to learn to be like the other kids. to be like a fucking child. and while she’s learning, she doesn’t speak for a year

that happened to me, but take your pick - I’m sure you don’t have to look far to find examples of your own.

My point is this: if you tell a child for their entire life that the only thing that is worthy of being loved is what they achieve, if every time they do something they love you tell them oh, you could be a famous writer! you’re so talented! rather than saying that you loved listening to their story, if you only praise them when they’re good and quiet and convenient and tell them that as long as they succeed, it doesn’t matter if they don’t have friends or if they’re miserable, and THEN you tell them to choose ONE THING and drop 90% of everything that makes them who they are -

what the hell did you THINK was going to happen??

because here’s the first thing. for many kids, whether that’s because of neurodivergence or age maturity or whatever, hyper fixations and hobbies aren’t just things they like to do. THEY ARE LIFELINES. they’re the things these kids go to when they’re hurt, angry, upset, because they make sense. for many kids, especially but not always girls, they are able to camouflage themselves and mask tendencies of neurodivergence because they’re ‘good students’. at a family gathering once, my mum, so frustrated at my inability and lack of desire to talk to any members of my extended family, snatched my German grammar book and locked it in the boot of the car. knowing that I escape and read it in the toilet was the only thing keeping me going, exhausted and stressed and overwhelmed. I vomited on the grass.

and here’s the second thing. you tell us from an early age that they only way we’ll ever be acceptable to the rest of society is if we succeed. autistic kids are fine, as long as they’re international maths olympiad champions. adhd kids are fine, as long as they’re famous athletes. if you’re obsessed with musicals that’s ok, as long as that obsession leads to a well-paying job as a successful writer on Broadway.

and then you tell us that we only have one chance at that success? and this decision determines the rest of our lives? and that we had so much potential when we were kids, and we better not waste it now? that not everyone is so lucky to be able to choose between so many things??

because being asked to choose between these things isn’t being asked to choose a hobby. when the only way anyone else defines you positively is by your success in one area, that becomes your entire identity.

so no, we’re not being too sensitive when you ask us to pick and choose what career, or what hobby to take forward. you’re not asking about hobbies. you’re asking us to choose what kind of person we want to be. you’re asking us to choose the most impactful way we can give back to the world, because we can’t waste those god-given talents. you’re asking us to figure out, still a child and hopelessly lost, what our purpose on this planet is. and you’re looking at us as if the ways that we survived all of these years, the things we clung to for comfort, are things we can just cast aside without further thought

ask me now, and I’ll tell you that’s not the way things work. we have second chances and third ones and tenth ones, we can be different things to different people and we can do different things at different parts in our lives, and be successful in different areas. life isn’t a fucking flowchart. and I’m still trying to come to terms with all the things I could have been, and my freak-outs about ‘wasted potential’ are so clockwork I could plan my calendar around them, but I’m beginning to understand that life doesn’t end when you’re twenty, or when you haven’t written a best-seller by eighteen. you have time.

but at fifteen? at fifteen, that question broke me.

do you know what you can do instead? you can show a little thoughtfulness. you can be kinder, and lead by example, and praise your kids when they’re kind too. when your son runs to you and shows you what you think is a better picture than you - a stick figure artisan, if you say so yourself - could ever create, you can actually just say you really like it. you can ask him if that’s him and daddy and the dog on a cloud. describe the picture back to him, and engage with this thing he’s made from his imagination - tell him the clouds he’s drawn are so big and fluffy and white, and ask if there are giant spiders living there. you know how to shut a child up? tell them yes dear, it’s wonderful. don’t be that person. promote your kid’s creativity - ask questions, have fun, play with this thing they’ve made - and not destroy it

when your daughter comes to you and shows you a song she’s written, don’t tell her she’s so talented or that she could be a musician one day. just sing along. ask her why she wrote it, and what she was thinking of when she did. ask her if she could make it different for two people singing it at the same time.

and if your child just really, really loves maths? let them do maths. it’s ok if their interests are stereotypical - as long as they love it and it’s fun, supporting them is wonderful. the best present my father ever got me was five hours of tutoring - an introduction to linguistics!! - when I turned twelve, starting on my birthday at 8am. I had never felt so understood and so loved.

as much as these simple things can destroy someone’s life, can stop them talking for a year, you have the chance to be that one voice of kindness that is a friend where a young person needs it most.

for me, this was the Bus Lady. I never knew her first name because I forgot immediately and was too embarrassed to ask again, but we got the bus together for two years right before I applied to university - she was a trainee teacher at my school. she saw that I missed tutor group and sat in the corridor every morning writing, and that I ran laps for an hour every lunchtime instead of sitting alone. but she came and sat with me one morning and asked what I was doing; I was developing a new shorthand and told her so warily.

she didn’t raise her eyebrows or say wow, that’s...that’s amazing. instead she frowned and looked at me skeptically and said ‘But why would you do that? There are plenty of functional shorthands out there - what does your shorthand have that they don’t? Tell me about it.’

I had no idea what to say

this was the first time anyone had actually ENGAGED in any capacity with what I was doing. and just like that, just by treating me seriously and asking valid questions and pointing out inconsistencies, I was a person who happened to have an idea that was in some serious need of questioning, and not a freak

there’s no way she remembers that interaction; she’s been a teacher now for year and probably doesn’t even remember who I am. But I had been this close to not going to university, to not bothering, and she made me stop, and wait a moment

she will never know the difference that that conversation and two months of kindness on the bus from a stranger made in my life.

so let’s be kind to each other, please. let’s be forgiving. let’s challenge each other and let’s engage with kids with special interests and listen to them talk. and so to any educators or teachers or parents or even other kids, I want to say - let’s treat our words seriously and with respect, like we treat our children, because they have immense capacity to hurt, because they can be used for good.

to any other fifteen year olds in a similar position, I just want to say: none of us here on tumblr have properly sorted our lives out, but I promise you it does get so much better.

you’re not too sensitive. you’re not a freak. you’re not only acceptable because you succeed. I know if you’re masking you feel you have to and it’s for survival, and I’m sorry, because you shouldn’t have to. and you should never, never have to think that you ‘have it good’ or that you’re lucky and are not allowed to hurt. there’s always some one who has it worse, and you can’t stop beat yourself up about that. fuck anyone who tells you otherwise. if you have gone through trauma, if you have unhealthy coping mechanisms, if you are depressed or anxious or otherwise mentally ill and some of it stems from this, I am so very very sorry. but you will be ok, even if you can’t write for a couple of years, or even if things change. you’ll get there. speaking as someone who is now writing for the first time in six years, drawing for the first time in longer, it’s scary and new and weird, but you will come out the other side.

and you do work hard. and you are creative. and you are loved. and you are so very, very kind.

*rant over*

#neurodivergence #neurodivergent #adhd #autism #giftedness #gifted kids #tag for this fucking awful school system?#neurodivergent kids #parenting #education #long post #meichenxi rants #mental health #trauma #depression #anxiety #mental illness #sorry for the scary tags I don't mean the post to be scary I'm just annoyed #and it got longer than I thought it would

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sunflowers-insherwood · 4 years ago

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Allan A Dale Analysis - 2x05

Analysing Allan’s Experience of the Confrontation with Robin in Ducking and Diving

As I was writing my analysis on Allan in 2x06 (which is coming tomorrow!), I realised it was necessary to first investigate this confrontation between him and Robin, as it changes their relationship massively and sows the seeds for the motivations behind their actions in the next episode. This is a quite casual line by line analysis of their conversation in the bar at the end of 2x05 (Ducking and Diving), and is quite speculative, as I outline my theories but also alternative interpretations – mainly of Allan’s viewpoint. I wrote out the transcript for this conversation myself, so the punctuation is intended to show more the pauses/ emotions rather than be grammatically correct. Let’s dive straight in! (Wordcount: 3.5k)

X = owner of the Tripp Inn, A = Allan, R = Robin

X: You’re late, I was going to keep your money back. Silver, not gold.

As soon as Allan walks into the room, he looks to the back corner and all around to ensure Robin isn’t there already to find him. He’s on edge and doesn’t want to be found, but now trying to do the right thing.

A: You’re gonna tell Gisborne to keep this money. I’m not doing this anymore, alright, I’ve changed.

I’m never sure what to make of the motives behind Allan’s actions here. To me, his actions are more of someone realising that their time’s up: he’s a rat on a sinking ship trying to cover his tracks before it goes under. This obviously paints him in a pretty bad light, as the only reason he’s stopping being a spy is because he’s about to get caught. I find this more believable than a realisation that he’s actually done wrong, however, because I doubt that if he hadn’t felt threatened he wouldn’t have tried to stop working for Gisborne then. I think he would have eventually, but it would’ve taken him longer to realise the severity of his actions. Alternatively, the reactions of the others and his conversation with Djaq have sped up his realisation process significantly and he’s genuinely guilty about what he’s done. Perhaps it’s a mix of both. On top of this, if he thought it was certain he would get thrown out by Robin, I think his survival instincts would tell him to keep the money and run. He refuses it, signifying he feels really guilty about what he’s done, or that he thinks he can still get away with it at camp. Maybe he intends to refuse the money, and then tell Robin he was working for Gisborne afterwards, to prove that he’s stopped being a spy.

X: It’s a bit late for a conscience now isn’t it?

A: Yeah. Very late.

Again, this could mean two things: that he knows he’s almost about to be caught, or that he genuinely feels bad and knows that he’s been playing the double agent for too long. I’m more able to believe the first but I think even if you see him as simply covering his tracks, the sincerity of how this line is delivered implies there is an emotional conflict going down here too.

*Arrow fires into bag of money. X gasps*

A: Robin. *swallows* You’re early.

I think of this as an attempt at humour, perhaps more to himself than anyone else as he says it so quietly. Classically the comic relief of the gang (when Much fulfils this function it’s accidental in his sincerity, Allan is more purposefully cheeky chappy about it) he’s still trying to lighten the situation and break the silence. Robin doesn’t allow it and Allan instantly has to go to defend.

R: Leave us.

A: Stay there.

This is an indicator of just how scared Allan is of what Robin will do to him – he wants the bartender to stay there as a form of protection, as a witness to anything Robin might try to do to him, under the theory that with someone else there Robin won’t hurt him so badly. Allan feels completely cornered, as he knows he can’t really blag his way out of this situation and that Robin would probably overpower him in a fight. Does Allan think he’s about to die? Quite possibly.

R: GET OUT! I need to talk to my spy.

A: What was that with Will? You banished Will.

Allan’s first thoughts are on Will. This could be (again) interpreted in two ways: he’s purely confused about the situation and is trying to work out where Robin stands, or he’s genuinely concerned for his best mate in the gang (which is the interpretation I prefer, although I think it’s a mixture of both). We see how torn up Allan becomes when Robin accuses Will of being the spy that afternoon – he almost admits to being the spy then as he cries ‘no…’ and ‘Robin…’ when he hears Robin explain it was Will, hating the idea that Will would be accused on his behalf. Even if he’s willing to sacrifice the cause, he’s still loyal to his friends, or at least tries to be. It actually benefitted Robin to frame Will as the spy, as Allan and him are so close; I know this was a random choice but it actually worked to Robin’s advantage, making Allan feel worse and acting as an extra punch in the gut.

R: It was an act! Only she knew who was guilty. And I knew the spy would want to come here before me to cover his tracks. For all I knew, it could’ve been Will standing there. But it’s not. Is it? It’s you.

On a related sidenote, @chaoticbitheatrekid recently mentioned ‘i don’t know if this is just me, but i always felt that if Robin had to pick one member of the gang to get rid of, he would pick Allan’. Although he says here ‘for all I knew, it could’ve been Will standing there’, to me the ‘but it’s not… it’s you’ indicates that, maybe if he didn’t consciously think it was Allan, to him Allan was the most likely to betray the gang.

A: Robin, it was over, ask her! I made a decision.

Robin interprets Allan’s presence here as I did, as Allan trying to ‘cover his tracks’. However, Allan did come here purely to reject the money, and he has a point here: if Robin asked the bartender, he would find out Allan was giving it back. I don’t think this would matter to Robin even if he did ask however, as he would purely view it as Allan trying to save himself rather than the more sympathetic view that he’s genuinely regretful.

R: Then what’s this?

A: No, I was giving it back.

This is true, but again Robin doesn’t investigate it any further. He consistently refuses to listen to Allan’s side of the story – something that Allan will become extremely bitter for later.

R: So you betray me. You betray yourself, you betray your king, and for what. For a few silver coins. What have you told Gisborne, Allan?

Another example of the differences between Robin and Allan’s priorities: Robin’s mind almost instantly goes to the King, a person I don’t think crossed Allan’s mind during this entire process. Perhaps ignorantly (or he’s decided to ignore the idea), he’s assumed the only thing his betrayal will impact is the gang’s immediate success. He can’t see the bigger picture that Robin strives towards, as his motivations for being in the gang are less to help other people (which I think he enjoys, but wasn’t the reason he joined) and more as a fun way of survival among friends. Robin also mentions (in true teacher fashion) that Allan has betrayed himself, indicating that Robin did believe Allan was a good person, perhaps especially due to his progression from a shameless liar at the start of series 1 to a pretty sturdy friend in series 2. Allan’s actions could almost be viewed as a relapse into the lies and pickpocketing associated with his brother. Interestingly, Robin doesn’t mention the rest of the gang at all here, implying that he sees Allan’s betrayal as a direct attack on him and the King. Allan begins to internalise this view in 2x06, but I think if he were to explain who he betrayed, he would only mention the gang.

A: Mmm… nothing really.

Allan seems almost awkward here. ‘Nothing really’ is obviously his attempt to diminish what he’s done to appeal to Robin, but also furthers the idea that doesn’t think he’s done anything too serious (he knows betraying the gang was serious, but doesn’t think the outcomes have been that bad), and that he never had intentions for his betrayals to impact more than the gang’s monetary success. This wasn’t helped by Guy reassuring Allan when he agreed to working for him that nothing he said would be of any real weight to the people or wider actions of the gang.

R: Does he know about the camp?

A: No.

R: No. Does he know about Marian?

A: No!

Allan’s reactions to this part of his interrogation further the theory that he really didn’t think he was impacting much outside of the gang’s money – he grows almost appalled at the idea of telling the location of the camp and Marian’s secrets to Gisborne, like they never even crossed his mind, or they were so out of the question that he never would have imagined telling him. He seems offended by Robin’s insinuation that he would betray the gang so greatly, that Robin’s idea of him is so low that he thinks Allan would sell the very safety of his friends for money. Robin’s assuming of the worst instantly is another action that Allan will grow to hate later, and although it is harsh, in Robin’s defence he is quickly ensuring the safety of his gang, not only accusing Allan. Their fighting is entirely based on a lack of proper communication and interpretation. If not loyal to the cause, Allan is loyal to the people he loves, and that can be seen by his repeated protection of Marian in the later episodes. He never tries to harm any of the gang apart from Robin (2x06), but I think that is due to loosing part of his love and respect for Robin in this confrontation. If he doesn’t lose it directly, he definitely projects Robin’s hatred of him onto Robin and villainises him until he feels justified in attacking him later.

R: More lies?

A: NO. This was the last time, I promise. And I was wrong. But he captured me, Robin, he tortured me, I didn’t have a choice-

You can hear how earnest Allan is on that final no. I guess Robin, in the midst of his anger and paranoia, can’t read just how truthful he is being. But I don’t think I’d be able to either, to be honest. Robin then interrupts him from speaking, actively talking over Allan rather than listening.

R: EVERYTHING IS A CHOICE. Everything we do!

Up until Robin says this, Allan has been purely defending his corner and reassuring Robin of everything he hasn’t done, and trying to get back on the same page – but when Robin diminishes his experiences of being captured and tortured, Allan flips and instead starts on the attack. You can see this change happen as he takes a second to think, eyes narrowing with offence as he thinks of what to say back. And what Allan said next has a point, Robin is in a place of privilege as the leader of the gang because if he gets captured, he’s never left for long enough to get tortured, and the Sheriff prefers to go straight to threatening to kill him anyway. He’s too prized a prisoner to be treated badly. Allan’s experiences of being caught are very different: he was left for hours, unsure if anyone would come and rescue him, while being pretty consistently tortured both physically and emotionally. (It’s also interesting that Allan doesn’t tell anyone anything while being physically hurt, but once Gisborne starts preying on his insecurities, he’s bought quite quickly. He is exhausted at that point but it looks like Allan is emotionally hurting more than he lets on to the rest of the gang. Also, he makes it explicitly clear that he isn’t going to help with killing anyone or giving away condemning information, it’s only when Gisborne brings up the idea of little bits of information he becomes swayed. The way to get to Allan is by convincing him what he’s doing isn’t actually harming anyone, actually showing he’s good at heart.) When Robin tells him ‘everything is a choice’, Allan sees it as a complete disregard of the position of hardships he’s been in. Robin’s lecturing him on morals, but in his eyes, Robin has never been/ will never be in the same difficult position as he was. Before that statement by Robin, Allan’s been feeling guilty, and been reaching out to reconnect with Robin – but at the dismissal of his experiences, Allan’s guilt turns to anger.

A: That’s easy for you to say though, isn’t it, huh? You get the glory, you get the girl. Everyone loves you. And then when the King comes back you’ll get lands, property, a wife, EVERYTHING. And what will I have? You are always in the sun, Robin, and I am always in the shade.

I’ll cover this more in the 2x06 analysis, but Allan’s biggest fears are being in pain, deprived, and without security. This outburst is actually one of Allan’s most vulnerable moments (looks like he’s only able to admit to his fears in anger) as he shows all of his insecurities by stating everything Robin has that Allan wishes he did. These play on his being deprived – ‘you get the glory, you get the girl’, ‘what will I have?’ – and being without security – ‘and then when the King comes back you’ll get lands, property, a wife’. As much as Allan enjoys being in the gang, he knows that it cannot be sustained for long and worries about what will happen to him after it ends and, he assumes, everyone goes their separate ways.

R: Is that meant to be an excuse. Heh?

In his anger, Robin misses the vulnerability in Allan’s side of the story. (To be fair to Robin, if I just found out someone I trusted completely had been selling important secrets to my arch nemesis, I’d be blinded by anger too.) But because Allan’s only way of showing vulnerability is by attacking Robin, and Robin takes the attack personally, he misses the insecurities behind Allan’s motivation by taking what he says as an excuse, not a reason. In this moment, Robin exerts his fury physically, pushing Allan up against a wall and shaking him – Allan sees no way out and begins to work on the defences again, realising he can’t gain anything but further disconnect by attacking Robin.

A: Give me another chance, please. I wouldn’t have let Gisborne hurt any of us, I’d never have told him anything like that.

I think this plea makes Allan looks particularly weak, as we see him switching tactics the second he realises one isn’t working (showing how clever he actually is), but also insinuating how happy to shift the truth he is in order to get what he wants. It makes him look almost cowardly, and in Robin’s eyes just furthers the mistrust, as he ricochets from an attack to a plea for forgiveness. However, it’s also a truthful admission by Allan of what he wouldn’t do and where he very firmly draws the line.

R: Harmless lies, innocent betrayals? They don’t exist, Allan!

Robin’s morals are consistently a lot stricter than Allan’s, and at their relationship’s best, this leads to Allan being inspired and positively influenced by him, but at its worst creates conflict and leads Robin to believe he is better than Allan, lecturing him on what is right (see 2x06).

A: Robin, I’ve changed. How can I get you to believe that?

I see ‘Robin, I’ve changed’ as an agreement with Robin that ‘harmless lies’ and ‘innocent betrayals’ don’t exist, but as Allan has only just realised the severity and extent of the actions he believed to be harmless until so recently, he shows his agreement through saying his beliefs have changed. He’s still reaching out to maintain his connection and trust with Robin and in turn, the gang. (I think if it hadn’t been Robin who had gone to the Tripp Inn, it would’ve been a very different outcome. Much would’ve been similar to Robin, casting him out immediately, but taking the betrayal very personally. John would’ve been really angry but I think Allan would’ve perhaps been able to talk him down. Will has a wicked temper for Allan to reckon with, and I think as Will and Allan are so close and Will’s morals so strong, he would be quite personally offended too, so Allan would struggle to win him over, but after some time to cool off Will would’ve heard Allan’s side of the story. Djaq says multiple times she believes Allan is a good man and could have changed, so would’ve listened to his entire story and possibly even let him stay if she believed him. As the leader of the group, Robin sees the gang as his responsibility to keep safe, hence having to be extra harsh in order to make sure they are protected.)

R: You can’t. And the funny thing is, you might be telling the truth.

Here, Robin shows he is aware of how blunt he’s being with Allan, but has so little trust for him he can’t even begin to think he’s telling the truth. He admits that Allan could be being truthful, but that he’s refusing to give him a chance anyway. In 2x06, as Allan becomes highly bitter, saying ‘you should’ve given me a second chance’, it’s likely largely in reference to this moment, where Robin refuses to even consider his viewpoint. For now though, Allan is still trying to regain Robin’s trust.

A: I am!

R: And how am I supposed to believe you anymore?

A: Robin, I swear to you, on my life.

*Robin holds knife up to neck*

A: Don’t kill me. Please.

I don’t think Allan comes across particularly well within this conversation, but the only reason he’s acting in a way that can be seen as cowardly is because he’s doing what he can to fight for his life the entire time, shown as he at first asks the bartender to stay, and coming to a peak here as Robin presses the blade to his throat. His attempts to stay alive have to be spoken, as he knows Robin would overpower him and there’s nowhere to run. His fears of what Robin would do to him are confirmed and in this moment, he truly has no idea whether Robin will kill him or not.

*Robin jerks knife away*

Woohoo Robin doesn’t kill him!

R: You are lucky I’ve left you with a life to swear upon. Never, ever, let me set eyes on you again.

This kind of insinuates Robin thought Allan deserved to die, or at least deserved a worst punishment than just being told to never come back to camp. As we see in the next episode, this doesn’t go to plan and essentially forms the basis for Allan’s further descent and the height of their physical conflict, which is in 2x06.

*Robin stalks away, Allan is left to feel sorry for himself*

TO SUMMARISE:

- Robin continually refuses to listen to Allan’s explanations, instead seeing them as excuses

- He dismisses Allan’s experiences of being captured and tortured, instead lecturing him on morals that Allan thinks he can’t afford to have (this is the biggest hurt for Allan, I think – the complete dismissal of his experiences)

- Robin’s quick to assume Allan would betray the gang completely (admittedly it’s better to be safe than sorry in these situations)

- He knows he could give Allan a second chance but doesn’t even consider it, and tells Allan this (a major catalyst for Allan’s anger in 2x06)

- He separates Allan from the gang, meaning Allan can’t go back to camp to collect his items, and can’t explain to his friends his side of the story; they will only hear it through Robin, furthering the bias against him

- Allan tries to reconnect and reassure Robin, only attacking him once and playing defence the rest of the time

- He came to the Inn to cover his tracks but also to return the money, implying he’s doing everything he can to stay with the gang – and whatever the motive, he was about to stop working for Gisborne

- Allan didn’t think his betrayals were as severe as they were, he never imagined telling Gisborne anything more than when they were planning on targeting a certain area

- Allan and Robin’s inability to listen and respond to one another properly leads to a worsening of the situation and drives them both to the actions of 2x06, as Allan becomes more bitter as he reflects on the conversation and Robin still doesn’t understand Allan’s motivations properly

Thank you so much for reading if you’ve made it this far, I hope you enjoyed! Please let me know your hot takes and interpretations too – did I miss anything? My analysis on 2x06 is coming tomorrow so keep an eye out for that :)

#allan a dale #robin hood #bbc robin hood #character analysis #robin of locksley #ducking and diving #allan a dale analysis

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selfcareparker · 5 years ago

Text

Sugarpie [p.p]

pairing: Peter Parker x reader

summary: You and Peter decide to spend Valentine‘s day together - as friends, though the lines between friendship and something more start to become a little blurry…

warnings: smut, puns about buns (omg-), swearing, I didn‘t realise until now but kind of parallels to the fic ‘Deja Vu‘ with Tom that I wrote??

word count: 3.5k

(x) ♡ Masterlist

Peter’s nervous. Would you tell him? Would Peter know if you already had a date for Valentine’s? He’s asked Mj and she said he was being ridiculous.

Here goes nothing-

Peter walks over to your locker where you’re standing, looking pretty as ever.

“Hey, Peter. Happy Valentine’s!” You say, hugging him for a hello.

Of course you had to bring up that it’s Valentine’s Day - will it be too obvious if he asks now? He’s not going to wait another year for the next V-day when you’ll have been scooped up by some other guy who - just like Peter - has realised how amazing you are.

“What are you doing after school… wanna hang out?”

“I was planning on baking cookies.” You tell him and Peter mentally slaps himself. He should have known that you already have a date, why did Mj tell him you were free today?

“Oh, okay, that’s fine. Sorry, I should’ve known you’re already busy with someone else. Want to hang out during the weekend, then?” Peter tries to save the situation and not to embarrass himself.

“Wait, no, no!” You laugh, grazing his arm, “I meant, I, alone, am going to bake cookies tonight, but you can join me. We can just hang out.”

Just hanging out today was not Peter’s plan, but it’s better than nothing.

“Oh, sure, cool. Should I bring some ingredients for the cookies? Oh- and I have to warn you, I have no baking skills, whatsoever.”

“Don’t worry, I’ll show you. And we can go buy all the food together, yeah? I need about an hour after our last lesson and then we can meet up.”

“Sounds good.”

“So, I got you a little gift. I walked past it in a shop after school and I thought it was quite funny.” You tell Peter while you’re on your way to buy the ingredients for your cookies and reach into your bag.

What, you got Peter something… Like for Valentine’s?

Peter was actually thinking about buying you flowers or something but a, he was busy showering and by the time that he was finished you texted him asking if you could meet to go shopping, and b, you clearly only saw today as ‘hanging out’ - as friends - and he didn’t want to make you uncomfortable with romantic gestures that were uncalled for.

“The shop had loads of cards, and I think this one was the funniest.” You pull out a Valentine’s Card with a pizza on it, and a white font saying ‘I wanna pizza dat ass’. Wait you want a piece of Peter’s ass? O-kay.

“That’s funny, thanks. I didn’t get you anything though.”

“Oh don’t worry, this was, like, one dollar. There was another one with a picture of a rollercoaster that said, ‘So excited to ride you’, but I thought that was a little too aggressive to give to an unassuming, male, pubescent friend.” You laugh and Peter agrees, it would have been weird… or it would’ve given him false hopes at least…

If you actually meant you wanted to ride him, that would have been quite beautiful actually.

He realises he’s been stuck in thought for too long but luckily you change the topic from wanting to ride him- uh- buying him a card, as a joke, about wanting to ride him, to the cookies you’ll be making.

“There’s something else you can ride.” Peter doesn’t know why he brings the joke up again, as he points to the shopping carts in front of the supermarket.

“Ha ha.” You say, “How about you ride it?”

“I’m sure it’ll break if you push me in it.” Peter argues, raising his eyebrows.

“You’re getting in.” He does as you say, and minutes later you’re pushing Peter - who is much heavier than you thought, if you’re honest - through the aisles and you’re both laughing your heads off until you nearly crash Peter into a wall, and you decide it’s better if you both just walk.

“I think we’ve got everything.” You check the recipe, when Peter throws another thing into the cart.

“Candy hearts. We can use them to decorate our cookies.” Peter comments and you look at them, “Cute.”

Peter makes you wait outside of the shop after you’ve paid because he claimed he had to buy something in secret.

What is this boy on about? Had you weirded him out by your joke about riding him? That’s just your type of humour and you thought he would find it funny too. You hope he’s really just buying something and not trying to get away from you.

You breathe a sigh of relief when you see him walk out of the shop, carrying something behind his back.

“I don’t think you can have a piece of my ass, that sounds painful. But you can still have a different piece of me.” He smiles and pulls out one of those candy necklaces, looping it around his neck and he passes you your own.

Without warning you take a step closer to Peter and pull slightly at his necklace, attaching your teeth to one of the sweets and from afar Peter’s sure it could look like you’re kissing his neck.

You pull away, “You taste good.” Oh God why is Peter making this harder for himself?

You end up going to Peter’s place because May isn’t home yet and you say your parents would be annoying at home.

The first load of cookies is finished surprisingly quick and you also realise you’ve made more than you could eat even on a hungry day. You decide to go give some to your friends, Mj, Ned and Betty, who you’re sure are also spending Valentine’s together.

You go to Mj’s first, and when she opens the door she shushes you two, “Wait don’t say anything!” You and Peter look at each other confused,

“Let me guess, so you two are spending Valentine’s together because you’ve finally realised that you belong together, and now you’re bringing me cookies to thank me because I’ve always said you’d make a cute couple.” Mj gets herself to smile, takes the cookies from your hands and leaves you standing there perplexed, shutting the door.

You wish what she said was true - obviously Peter doesn’t feel that for you though.

Before either of you have the chance to say something to make this even more awkward you make your way over to Ned and Betty’s.

“Have a nice Valentine’s day, you lovebirds.” Betty winks.

“Yes! And thanks for the cookies!” Ned agrees, casting a look you don’t understand at Peter.

Betty knows about your crush on Peter.

Ned knows about Peter‘s crush on you, which you obviously don‘t know, so the whole situation is just awkward but you and Peter, again, escape quickly.

“Why does everyone think we’re together?” You question, but Peter doesn’t know either.

“I have no idea, but if a girl as pretty as you was together with a nerd like me, I’m sure my dick game would really have to be on point.”

“Well, is it?”

He laughs, “I wouldn’t think so, you’re looking at a first-class virgin.”

“I don’t see a mirror anywhere.” He picks up on your joke and smiles at the fact that you haven’t been in any relationships Peter didn’t know about.

You’ve nearly finished the second raw load of cookies, “I’ll let you do the honours.”

You pass Peter the candy hearts to press into the cookie dough and he distributes them evenly. He has one left and passes it to you, ‘Love you’, it says on the candy.

“Love you too, sugar pie.” You tell Peter, reading more words from the candy conversation hearts. Not knowing what you’re referring to, Peter chokes on his water, spilling it over himself, but since you’re standing so close it mostly gets on you and your white shirt that immediately becomes see-through.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorr- woah what are you wearing underneath that?” His eyes go wide once he takes in the red lace peeking through from underneath your clothes.

“Oh, I, uh… underwear?”

“So you just wear stuff like that everyday?” Peter’s caught on to the fact that the red lace isn’t necessarily suitable for everyday use.

“Well it is Valentine’s day.”

“Who are you wearing it for then?” Peter hopes he doesn’t sound as jealous as he is at the thought of you wearing that for another guy, even if you just told him you’d never had sex and his fear is irrational.

“Just for myself. I couldn’t resist all the online offers so I thought I’d treat myself to something - it really didn’t matter I was going to be the only one to see it. I’ve been lifting my shirt every time I’ve passed a mirror today though.”

He nods, still staring.

“You wanna see?” You aks randomly.

His body isn‘t listening to his brain and so Peter just nods.

You pull your wet shirt over your head, revealing the lingerie and more bare skin than Peter’s ever seen of you.

You know you look good and although Peter’s eyes on you make you shy, the look in them is most definitely positive.

“Uh, you also spilled some on my pants so…” You look at Peter, slowly pulling down your pants in the sexiest way you can muster even when you have to shimmy your hips a little to pull your ankles out the bottom of your jeans, and Peter’s wide eyes are telling you he likes it. He’s looking at you like you’re walking the catwalk right now.

“I’m not gonna lie, you look extremely sexy right now.” Peter compliments, fiddling with his shirt.

“You know how you gave me a gift - the card I mean - I didn’t get you anything.”

“You gave me this candy necklace.” You draw your eyebrows together.

“Yeah, but you paid for all of the stuff for the cookies so I still kind of owe you, I should give you something.”

“Well, what do you have in mind?”

Peter’s sitting on the floor in front of your bed, head peeking out from between your knees.

“So you’re sure about this?” He asks, stroking your leg.

“Yeah, just give me a second, won’t be long.”

You stumble to the bathroom just to think clearly about this situation. You freshen up a bit, looking at your reflection and you can absolutely understand why Peter offered to eat you out.

You come to the conclusion that, right now, there’s absolutely nothing you want more, than Peter’s tongue between your legs.

You skip back into Peter’s room and sit on the bed, he’s leaning against his nightstand, looks up at you, “So, are we still doing this?”

“Yes, but are you sure you want to do it too?”

“Absolutely.” He answers and then shoots up, “Wait, I haven’t washed my hands.” He runs to the bathroom and you wonder whether it’s really just to wash his hands or if he’s doing the same thing you just did.

You know he’s also sure he’s up to doing this when you hear his hasty steps getting closer to you, and your hands already wander down your panties, making you even wetter than you already are.

He’s breathing hard when he kneels down in front of you again, staring at the hand under your panties and you giggle.

“Relax, Peter.” You smile at him, brushing a hand through his hair.

“I wanna make you feel good now.” He says, determined, grabbing both your legs to spread them further.

“Off to a good start.” You pull your wet fingers from your underwear and promptly pull your panties to the side to reveal to Peter how wet just the thought of him has made you.

You let go of the fabric and it falls back into place and Peter glances up at you, asking to see again, though still nervous.

“Don’t worry, Peter, you’ve done something right already, and you haven’t even done anything yet, so? You wanna… maybe - start?” You lift your legs off the floor and with your help he pulls off your panties and then your bra and boy looks like he’s staring at a goddess, his breathing becoming uneven again.

“Calm down, it’s okay, we can talk. I’ll tell you what I like.”

“How do I start?” He asks.

You use two fingers to spread your lips and put a finger on your clit, “You start here - either with your finger or-” a breath that’s actually more of a moan leaves your mouth when Peter’s tongue is suddenly on your clit, “-tongue.” you finish.

Though how his tongue concentrates directly on your little button feels good, it won’t be enough to get you to cum.

“You can move a bit more, bit further down and up again, oh, yes.”

After not too long he finds the perfect pace and where exactly to touch you to make you feel good. You moan out Peter’s name when you climax.

“Fuck.” You both say at the same time.

And Peter still thinks you look so effortlessly beautiful, in all your naked glory, trying to even out your breathing.

You think of just leaning down and kissing him. That should be fine after what he just did, right?

He’s looking up at you and you move closer but you realise the front door has just opened and you can hear May’s voice from the other room.

Peter jumps up and you scramble to get on a shirt of Peter’s while he says hi to his aunt, making sure she won’t pick up on what her nephew just did to you.

“Oh that smells nice.” May compliments once she gets to the kitchen.

“Yeah, we were just baking cookies, like I told you, but then I accidentally spilled some water so we just went to my room and I gave her one of my shirts.” Peter reports, he’d texted May earlier that his plan to ask you out on a date for Valentine’s hadn’t exactly worked but you were still hanging out together to bake.

You hurry to the kitchen in Peter’s ‘I survived my trip to New York’ shirt to greet May. Whenever he’s wearing that shirt he looks like a shapeless potato - which doesn’t matter because they’re pyjamas - but you look so fucking cute it should be illegal.

He doesn’t know if it’s a curse or a blessing that May keeps you two occupied the whole time, making conversation and helping you with the rest of the cookies.

You hum once you taste the sugary heaven on your tongue, saying how good the cookies taste, and Peter’s eyes on you tell you that you still tasted better.

By the time that May finally gives you two some time alone it’s so late that you have to leave and the situation from earlier doesn’t come up again.

“So. Valentine’s Day last week was nice.” Peter whispers to you during your lunch break.

“Yeah - what part?” By the way you’re raising your eyebrows and smirking, Peter knows you’re on the same page - you might not talk about your actual feelings, but you’re not going to pretend the sexual encounter, which you both thoroughly enjoyed, didn’t happen.

“The part in my bed.”

“Not quite sure what you mean - care to elaborate?” You rest your jaw against your hand, arm propped up on the table, your elbow grazing Peter’s.

“The part where I gave you,” he forms the next part as more of a question, “one of the best orgasms of your life?”

“Not just one of the best.” You assure him and Peter grins, and you’re calm, cool and collected again, “Yeah, I remember that. What about it?”

“Well I thought maybe, if you want, then we could um, repeat it.” Peter proposes.

“Yes. And what about if this time I help you out instead?”

“You don’t have to do that, I mean I really had fun last time, so I’d like to make you feel good again.”

“‘M not going to argue with that.”

That day you’re alone at your home and with a little help from your vibrator, Peter has you undone in less than two minutes.

You wouldn’t admit it, but you’ve never been as wet as with him.

Under the pretext of ‘hanging out’, you’re at Peter’s place again a few days later and he’s inching closer and closer to you in his already small bed and his intentions are clear.

“You wanna… you know, go again?” He asks you.

“Well, I’m on my period right now, so we can finally focus on you and I can take care of you.”

“No, you don’t have to.”

“Why not?” You urge, “I don’t have to, and I’ll accept if you don’t want me to. But can you at least tell me why? I’ve offered it to you like three times and every time you said no. Is it because of me? Am I not attractive enough for you to get off to-”

“What? Nonono, it’s nothing like that at all.”

“What is it then?” You take his hand and he opens up to you.

“Well, when I’m going down on you, I really enjoy it. I mean your body is so sexy and feminine… and your pussy - well, what I’m trying to say is, you’re beautiful and even just the thought of you - I could get off to that. But I know that most girls don’t like… dick as much as guys like pussy so, yeah.” He shrugs.

“I don’t understand. Are you telling me you’re self-conscious about your dick?” You manage not to laugh, he’s worn grey sweatpants around you when he wasn’t hard, so you can only dream of how big he’ll be then.

“Don’t laugh, and I don’t necessarily mean the size I guess, but I just know you wouldn’t enjoy it as much as I enjoy going down on you.”

“But it’s not just about me liking your dick. And, sure I might not want a picture of your cock as my phone wallpaper, but I can guarantee you I don’t exactly mind helping you out.

And anyway, it’s not about that. It’s about trusting someone enough to see you so vulnerable, and to touch you and please you. And to want to please you. And I want that, to please you, I mean. But only if you’ll let me.”

“Of course.” Peter’s still only sitting next to you. He’s kissed the most intimate parts of your body, but not the lips on your face yet. And finally, you lean in to him, connecting your lips to his, in a soft kiss.

It just lasts a few seconds before it’s over.

You feel his muscles contract under your hands and his cock twitches once you reach his pants.

It’s only a few minutes later, and you’ve ended up beyond turned on, Peter with white, sticky streaks on his stomach, your hands covered too, and a cock that’s already hard again.

It’s a long night before he’s finally satiated, but it’s more than worth it.

The next weekend, and you’re hanging out with Peter again- this far it’s seriously only been hanging out.

You’re lying together on your bed, both listening to music, sharing memes and videos, when you decide you can’t go on like this anymore.

You put your phone aside and Peter does the same, waiting for what you have to say, but when he glances at your neck and he says something after all.

“You still have that candy necklace?”

“Yeah - you gave it to me, of course. The candy can last up to five years before expiring, and I’ll have eaten all of them before that, for sure.”

He smiles, “I ate mine the first day I bought it.” And there’s silence again.

“Peter?”

He turns to his side, kissing your mouth but you stop the kiss, laughing into his mouth.

“I, I was actually going to ask; what is this between us?”

“Oh,” he sighs, “whatever you want this to be, I guess.”

“So... friends?” It‘s not a suggestion of yours, but a worry about what Peter wants from you.

“If this,” his fingers pass the waistband of your panties and find your clit immediately, and you gasp, “-if this is what friends do and as long as I‘m the only friend you do this with, sure - friends.”

You sit up, trying to disregard how you’re already wet. “Wait so you... you want to be like, exclusive?”

“I do, yeah. I want it to be just you and me, if you want the same.”

“Yeah I wanna do that - be that - whatever. I want the same, Peter.” You kiss him, passionately for the first time.

“I’m so glad - I really can’t even stand the thought of you with another guy.” He mumbles against your neck.

“Didn’t want to see you with another girl either.”

“Don’t worry, I only want you.”

“Peter?”

“Hm?”

“I wanna pizza dat ass.”

#Peter Parker x reader #Peter Parker smut #Spiderman x reader #peter parker #Peter Parker x you #avengers #Spiderman x you #marvel #mcu #fanfiction #spiderman homecoming #spiderman far from home #Peter Parker one shot #Peter Parker imagine #smut #fem!reader #selfcarecap

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ootori-sibs · 4 years ago

Text

Kyoya's second shot

Episode eighteen: Plan B!

Tw: implied self harm

"Kyoya? You have yet to hand in your homework?"

Monday again, Kyoya had a plan that was about to be put into action, but unfortunately he hadn't managed to bring himself to complete the homework expected of him. He looked up from his book, well aware of all the eyes that were on him. The teacher seemed to have assumed it was a mere mistake that Kyoya had forgotten to hand it over, he stared at her with blank eyes, "yes ma'am," he sighed, hanging his head, "I am aware."

People gasped and the entire classroom broke into a cacophony of hushed whispers, even Tamaki leant over and hissed, "Kyoya! Are you feeling alright?"

The teacher looked unsettled, adjusting the cuffs of her shirt. She swallowed and tried to make her tone sound gentle, "alright, is there a reason you have yet to hand your work in?"

"Yes ma'am," Kyoya started, not wanting to finish that statement. People were all looking at him, it was unfathomable that an Ootori would fail at such a simple task, and Kyoya was especially known for being painfully studious. He looked back down at his book, bracing for the outcry, "I simply didn't get around to finishing it, my apologies ma'am."

10:23 - I did not complete my homework, the class have gone mad with shock after hearing.

Go mad they did; the whispers quickly became normal talking, people were phoning their friends and he was sure someone had been recording him. He simply sighed, waiting for the teacher to stop talking about his homework. Said teacher looked extremely unnerved, unsure what to do, "well uh, this is certainly a surprise but I suppose this is the first time this has happened so I'll let you off with a warning, please try and complete it as soon as you can, alright?" Kyoya nodded and the teacher moved on to other things.

The rest of the class seemed intent on staring at Kyoya, whispering about how shocked and disturbed they were. Kyoya shuddered as he realised that this was the kind of tiny change that would send Tamaki into full nonsense mode, he would likely get no reprieve. He had been planning to complete the homework during club hours as well…

So he just sat there in silence, ignoring the very pointed looks he got from Tamaki. Unfortunately he couldn't ignore Tamaki whilst they were walking between classes, "soo…" the accusation started, perfectly innocent, "you didn't do your homework?"

"Does that really matter? What bearing does it have on your day?" He didn't like being short with Tamaki, but he wasn't about to have a discussion about it with him. His heart was hammering in his chest already, he’d never done something like that before and he felt he was about to cry and/or faint.

Tamaki clutched both his hands, nearly knocking poor Kyoya into the wall, “you never forget that kind of thing!! You're always so serious and smart! You’ve never done anything like this before! What's going on??"

"That's none of your business." He pushed Tamaki away, frowning, "please don't assault me like that again, I'm not in the mood to deal with that today." He proceeded to turn on heel and walk down the corridor, towards his class. He felt bad for leaving Tamaki on his own like that, but he felt he had been in the right to get upset, it wasn't any of Tamaki's business to pry into.

Tamaki, obviously told the other hosts, and of course they panicked and did their best to figure out what was 'wrong' with Kyoya. Obviously Kyoya didn't humour them, just sighing and telling them that it's none of their concern, that he doesn't need their intervention. Even Haruhi seemed worried, approaching him towards the end of the very first session.

"Senpai? Are you alright? I know they're being a bit annoying at the moment but it's just because they care," she smiled gently, sitting down at his table. Kyoya resisted the urge to roll his eyes, hating every word that left her damn mouth. They don't care, they just want to poke their noses where it doesn't belong, both of them knew it, Haruhi just liked to pretend to be nice about things like this.

"The key word here being annoying," was his only answer, not even glancing at her for more than half a second, she didn't deserve that much.

A sigh, she raised an eyebrow and tilted her head just a little, "you've been very snappy lately, is there a reason for this?"

Yeah, he's looking at her. Kyoya stopped what he was doing, turning to look at her, "do you just want to know why I didn't do my homework?" He knew that she wanted to know, but he also knew that wasn't why she was asking. He was mainly trying to get her to shut up and leave him alone, he didn't want to talk to her.

It worked, as she stood up, turning to leave, "I'm here if you need someone to talk to, senpai." He actually did roll his eyes at that, hating the way she acted like she was so much better than him.

Woman#2: I can't do my job if you can't take me off the blacklist.

Moron.

Oh right, her. Kyoya sighed and did as he was told, hating what he had to resort to. He hoped it would work.

A week went by and Friday rolled around, Kyoya had nearly forgotten what he'd asked Sieka to do, and was just looking forward to no longer being grounded. He'd ended up stealing the twins' spare fabric shears, and had made sure to clean them before he returned them to their place in the storeroom the day before. This morning he was sure to do his makeup fully, no more lacking as he had done the past week.

When he saw the note on Tamaki's desk, he remembered what Sieka was to do. Her job was simple; talk to Tamaki every day, get fully on his good side, then send him an anonymous love letter, requesting that he meet her in a quiet corner of the school, making sure the letter only gives enough information to stand out from the others, Kyoya would encourage him to go see, so she didn't need to work so hard to do that, but Haruhi would walk by, just when that happens, Sieka would ensure something scandalous to enrage her- Kyoya had told her to make it up as she goes along.

"Usually they put love notes in the mailbox…"

"Maybe she wanted to make sure you read it," Kyoya offered, "you know who wrote it?"

Tamaki shook his head, rereading the letter, "no clue, why would someone write me a love note if they know I've got a girlfriend."

Ugh, that sentiment made Kyoya feel nauseous, a girlfriend, ew. "Strange isn't it?" He had to agree, to make Tamaki happy, "maybe you should go, just to ask her?" Tamaki looked at him in confusion, so Kyoya continued, "well obviously she knows, so there has to be a reason she sent the letter regardless, I think you should go, so you can find out."

"I am curious…" Tamaki pondered on the idea, "you think Haruhi will get mad if I go see?"

"Just don't tell her," he shrugs, frowning, "if she gets mad over something so small, she doesn't deserve you." He offered a smile when Tamaki looked concerned, "it's not like you're accepting the confession, just asking."

The king nodded, smiling a little, "you're right, you're always right. Ok, I'll go see."

Kyoya chuckled, feeling a rush of good feelings as Tamaki praised him, "oh you don't want to say that Tamaki, what if you give me an ego?" He smirked as the blonde laughed, feeling like it was almost back to normal for just a second.

"You've already got one! I couldn't give you a bigger one if I tried!"

"I mean, you've definitely got the superior ego," Kyoya shrugged, knowing full well that neither of them had very high self esteem in truth, they just liked to act like they were egotists.

"Ha!" A slap on the back and Kyoya winced, Tamaki was always one to play rough, "at least I'm not the evil one!" Kyoya smiled fondly at that, remembering the first time Tamaki had called him evil.

"Oh, you have no idea…" well he was evil now wasn't he? It was no longer still aesthetics, and it was the aesthetics that Tamaki was fond of.

The first club session was good, quite quiet actually, the other hosts were pleased to hear that today was the last day of kyoya being grounded, having gotten grounded last friday, so naturally they made plans to hang out over the weekends. "Oh! How about a sleepover on Saturday!"

"We can use my place this time!" Tamaki grinned, "I've made sure to get extra blankets and futons since last sleepover!"

"Oh about that," Kyoya spoke up quietly, "would it be possible to achieve another 'boys night', as you put it?"

"Yeah!" Hikaru nodded, a grin on his face as Kaoru agreed, the two nodding in unison.

"We could do that on Sunday, right boss?"

Tamaki nodded, snapping his fingers, "of course we can! Anything for my best friend!" He paused, glancing down at Haruhi, "oh, you don't mind not joining us on Sunday as well, do you Haruhi?"

She just deadpanned up at him, "believe me, I'm totally fine with just one extra day with you guys."

Then came lunch, and Tamaki made his way down to the specified location. Kyoya made sure to follow him part of the way, finding a place to sit where he was at least within earshot, but he made sure to stay out of view, he didn't want to ruin his own plans. He opened his phone to text the twins, he almost felt bad using them as tools to erase suspicion like this, but it had to be done.

Demon-lord: We're out of commoners coffee, could you get some?

The annoying one: We'll tell Haruhi to do it,

Kaoru: she knows where to get it.

He knew they'd do that, they always make Haruhi do that. Those boys were such fools, always doing the playing and never realising when they were being used. Although, other than their cruel nature, Kyoya was quite fond of them, they were the second hosts that he considered friends. He had forgotten how cruel they could be, he had almost forgotten to see their nicknames and terms for him as their way of expressing friendship, but it wasn't, was it? It was just their cruel nature leaking through, corrupting everything around them.

Either way, Sieka was here now, Kyoya could hear her speaking. "You came! You know, I really didn't think you would," she giggled, it wasn't her natural laugh, it was the one she put on to appear innocent.

"Princess Ayanokoji? It was you?" Tamaki seemed surprised, of course he was, but Kyoya could hear the little layer of spite in Tamaki's voice, oh it almost made him shiver. Tamaki knew how badly Seika hated Haruhi, and although it was inconvenient, hearing Tamaki so bitter was… interesting.

"Yes," Sieka seemed to ignore his tone, she was likely making her attempt to corner him now, "I hope you enjoyed the letter I wrote, I worked very hard on it."

"But you know I'm with Haruhi, you knew…"

"You aren't very close, for a couple, are you? She doesn't even love you, and she boasts about that to your best friend. That has to hurt, are you alright, Tamaki?"

Ooh, cutting where it hurts, Kyoya hadn't expected that but it would definitely help. The shock in Tamaki's voice as he spoke proved that, "but… she…"

Footsteps, Kyoya caught a glimpse of Haruhi passing the room he was hiding in, there she goes. Kyoya almost felt scared, he was hurting her, he was hurting them both. He glanced down at his hands, lipstick smudged on his right thumb, ink on his left forefinger and thumb, a small, half-healed cut on his right hand from when he slipped with the twin's fabric shears. What had happened to him? What was he doing?

But it was too late to stop it now, this should be the straw that breaks the camel's back. Kyoya was doing this, Kyoya was tearing his friends apart… Kyoya was tearing them apart with a smile...

Wow, you're beginning to look really evil…

...guess you're finally showing your true colours.

Wasn't that what Tamaki had said? Looking into Kyoya's eyes after such a weak moment, all he saw was evil? Tamaki had always called Kyoya his best friend, always praised Kyoya's mental fortitude and pointed out any little kindness Kyoya proved he had. Even after all that positive reinforcement, was Kyoya still the same villain Tamaki had laughed at, the same boy who had been pushed to the edge by just a few words from the blonde? Kyoya felt like crying at that revelation, had Tamaki really not had any effect on him? After all this?

He could hear yelling, Haruhi was yelling at Seika, she must be really mad to blow up at her like that… she yelled at Tamaki to go back to the club room. Kyoya should probably make his way back there too, he'd told Tamaki he'd wait there for him. Luckily, Kyoya knew a few shortcuts, so he got there just before Tamaki, waiting outside because he knew the others would be there by now, ready to set up for the next session.

#kyoya ootori #ouran high school host club #tamaki souh #tamakyo #Haruhi Fujioka #Seika Ayanokoji

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translitsupplement · 4 years ago

Text

Watching and Learning - "Darryl" by Jackie Ess

Reviewed in this essay:

Darryl - Jackie Ess (Clash Books, 2021)

I read Jackie Ess’ new book Darryl recently and, like a cliche, I couldn’t put it down. I started reading it at about seven AM and before I knew what was happening, it was afternoon and the book was over, and I felt like crying a little. It was a damn good read.

It follows Darryl, a guy who lives off an inheritance and likes watching his wife fuck other men. He’s a cuck, as they put it, and he’s strangely proud of it. There’s a bit where he talks about coming out as one to his mom, and it’s funny and kind of cringe, but in a good way. Which is about how I’d sum up this novel: Darryl is a guy who stumbles around, searching for answers, and he doesn’t always like what he finds but he’s plucky and keeps on searching all the same.

Ess takes readers into the darker corners of the web where people play for keeps and occasionally die, and eventually, Darryl faces the darkness himself. It’s hard not to ask sometimes if it’s a GHB dream, and to ask if he’s scared of finding himself in this darkness… but there’s always Ess’ sense of humour and compassion, and her skillful writing keeps the book grounded.

Darryl’s an internet novel, in the same way that Patricia Lockwood’s new book No One Is Talking About This is, and it’s written in a similarly breezy, casual way about the trouble and mess the internet can bring to people’s lives. Darryl is writing a blog, or just keeping people updated on his comings and cummings, and the people he runs across. The demonic shrink Clive, the tarot-reading Sartori, and Bill, a guy who likes fucking Darryl’s wife and becomes something more than a friend.

But he’s plugged in online, talking about his message board pals, people calling each other “cucks” on the internet, and investigates people like a sleuth. He’s a smart, interesting guy who knows a little about poetry, opera and has opinions on the Golden State Warriors. As Torrey Peters’ blurb puts it, he’s a seeker. And in him, we find some answers, particularly to the statement posed one time by Vonnegut: we are who we pretend to be.

For example, about halfway through the book, Darryl has a moment where he talks about crossdressing:

“The idea of crossdressing is so fucked up, man, like what do actual women wear? Not big frilly dresses. Not big frilly dresses. T-Shirts and jeans, yoga pants, fast fashion bullshit. So what’s crossdressing? That’s what I already wear. It’s just an attitude.” (Pg 88).

In little bits like this, Darryl resonated with me. Back a few years ago, when I was trying to get my shit together, I wrote about Grimes and her “vibing in a gender-neutral zone” and asked what women’s clothing is but just a different fitting shirt. A few years later, I’m wearing that shirt and taking seven pills a day and have a different legal name. I’m not saying Darryl is a trans narrative or anything, but I am saying I saw myself reflected at times in this book and it’s stuck with me.

There’s other ways I saw myself here. I too spent a lot of time on the internet looking for answers to questions; unlike him, I never had the time or social skills to like meet up with people off-line, and my journey took a longer, maybe less weird route through stuff like Fictionpress, Tumblr blogs and eventually, a zine Ess edited a few years back which influenced me enough I followed all the writers from it on twitter. It’s weird seeing someone ask themselves similar questions as one asked oneself back in the day, but it’s refreshing, interesting and kind of messy. And maybe that’s a better way to look at this.

A more serious review might ask how Darryl examines stuff like masculinity in the 21st century, and maybe someone will write that review. I’m just here, at 9:30am on my day off, on coffee number four, trying to sort my thoughts about this book into something coherent. Something more than “Hey, I really liked this book and I think it’ll win a Lammy.” But I’m willing to bet it will.

Throughout Darryl, I found myself glued to the action. It’s told in a simple way, with down-to-earth prose, and although the story takes on an otherworldly quality - like how I imagine Twin Peaks is, although I’ve only seen bits and pieces - with murders and sex and death and a town with hidden secrets, it always comes across like Darryl is telling you story, maybe over a beer and maybe while you’re watching the big game, not because either of you really care about sports, but because he’s feels like he’s supposed to, and maybe you do too.

I feel sometimes that Peters writes what I’d call messy fiction, in that her characters are fully shaped and involved in tangled, frayed relationships, as compared to someone like Casey Plett, who’s people feel heartbreakingly real, but have a comparatively cleaner life. I’m thinking of, say, The Masker, a story about two people in Vegas (I think - it’s been a minute since I read it) who are involved in the sexual underground, in a relationship with dark edges of sex and violence. I think Darryl lives in a similar universe. It’s messy and the people are complicated. They get mixed up in things that threaten to sweep them away, with people who are dangerous to know, and sex with strangers who smack people around.

But gosh, I wish I could write like this, even if I’d never want to live in this world.

All in all, it’s a stunning debut novel, a compelling story about a seeker who gets more than he reckoned for when he started asking his wife to fuck other men while he watched. It’s equally moving and funny, and like I said up top, I literally read this book in one marathon stretch. It’s not out for a few weeks, but you can pre-order it via Clash Books. I’d recommend you do.

#darryl #jackie ess #clash books #book review #books

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blissedoutphil · 4 years ago

Text

Dan the Personal Assistant Epilogue

1038 words

on ao3

~Part 13~

“Wake up, boy.”

Dan groaned, sprawling his body to Phil’s side of the bed.

“Do you want a spanking?” Phil chided, buttoning up his own shirt.

Dan made a sound that was like a whine, but it was muffled into the pillow.

“What was that?” Phil lightly smacked his butt through the blanket.

“No Sir,” Dan grumbled, finally sitting up.

“Hey, at least you don’t actually have to go anywhere,” Phil kissed his forehead, “I wish I could stay home and work here with you.”

“I wish you could stay here with me too,” Dan pouted, looking downright precious as he rubbed his eyes.

Dan dragged himself out of bed to walk Phil to the door. They kissed goodbye and Phil left for work. He opened the blinds and let the morning light warm the home - their home. He was still amused by the spiderman on the cord, and didn’t think he’d ever lose the humour for it.

After their New York trip, Phil had asked him to move in with him. It was harder than he’d thought to part with his simple and empty tiny apartment. He’d still had the mindset that he didn’t deserve what he’d consider high-class living in Phil’s penthouse. He’d never get used to it, he’s a simple guy, he’d thought. But he’d be mad to want to stay in an empty bed alone at night when he could be wrapped in Phil’s warmth instead. About a year later, and he’s settled in great. Phil always told him that he used to keep decorating this place yet it never felt complete, until Dan moved in. Now, Dan added on to their growing knick-knack collection, making this - their - place as whole as it could be.

He got dressed and had a quick breakfast before going to the office room. He’d been so afraid of what the future held once he was ‘laid off’ as Phil’s assistant. But Phil made sure he had nothing to worry about. Phil guided him to find his interests. He’d thought he’d never have passion in anything. He’d viewed himself as a failure ever since he dropped out of university anyway.

Phil was so kind that he broke down and told Phil that Phil didn’t deserve to have a boyfriend this dependent on him. But Phil wanted to take care of him, and Dan had no choice but to learn to embrace being taken care of.

Dan didn’t have the qualifications to work in the field he liked, so Phil signed him up for a part-time degree. It was easier for Dan to handle after a bad university experience. He liked that half of the course was online and the pace was slower so that he had time to do other things.

Things like getting a job.

Phil had insisted he could help Dan with the tuition fees.

“You’re my boyfriend, not my ATM,” Dan had retorted.

He had quite a sum from his stint as Phil’s assistant to pay off the fees, but he still wanted to be useful and help with his share of the house bills. So he worked whenever Phil was at work too and he didn’t have classes; it was better than staying home alone anyway.

His online class lasted for 3 hours, and though he loved his new course compared to his previous attempt at a degree, school was still school and he wanted nothing but a nap sometimes.

But he stayed at his desk and worked on his assignment instead. He’d asked Phil to help him - make sure he woke up for his lessons, didn’t procrastinate his assignments, studied for his tests. He did not want to fail his second attempt at school. Phil took the role very seriously. Sometimes Dan found it cute how Phil, an accounting graduate, tried to help him with psychology notes. Other times, it was less cute when Phil threatened to spank him or lock his dick for weeks if he didn’t study. But Dan had asked him for such help, and he was glad that he had Phil for some kind of kinky discipline.

Sometimes, he’d procrastinate on purpose just to get that spanking, but he would never tell Phil.

This time though, he made sure he finished his assignment before he had to leave for work.

-------------------

“Nice to see you’re finally early for once,” Frank said, rather surprised as he took his seat across the table from Phil in the coffee shop.

Phil was already buried in his laptop, preparing the documents he wanted to share with Frank. He huffed at Frank’s comment, but didn’t rebut it. His cup was already half empty, indicating to Frank that he’d left the office and was sitting here for a while before lunchtime already. Surprisingly, it wasn’t caramel macchiato like what Frank would’ve expected Phil to drink.

Frank glanced at the counter, and nothing was surprising anymore.

“Ahh, you got the seasonal special drink from the special barista, did you,” Frank smirked.

Phil rolled his eyes, but he smiled anyway. “He can make you one too.”

Before Frank even ordered, his special coffee came his way.

“On the house,” Dan smiled at Frank, the same way he’s given Frank’s drink every time they came here for lunch or work while his shift was on.

Frank had insisted to pay lots of times, but to Dan, no amount of free coffee could ever repay how Frank had helped him and Phil back in New York.

“It’s the least I can do,” Dan would always answer as he refused payment.

“I was only being a snoopy busybody,” Frank had moped the first time, as he put his card back into his wallet. These days, he’d cheekily offer to pay just to see Dan get annoyed about how it’s the hundredth time I’m telling you, Frank, you don’t have to!

“Thanks, love,” Phil replied before Frank could this time, “see you at home later tonight.”

Dan all but beamed at him. Who would’ve known he’d end up here, happier than he could ever remember with everything he’d ever need and a love he’d never dreamed of getting, all because he accidentally sent a wrong - not to mention incredibly embarrassing - job application video?

----------------------------

The end :,)

When I wrote the summary as “But what happens when he accidentally sends a wrong video?” I never thought it’d end up this way either lmao.

This fic was born solely because of a prompt sent in which made me want to write office smut and nothing more. But somewhere along the way, between irl dan & phil coming out, me graduating uni and starting a proper job and losing free time to write, and the occasional discussion on the morality of writing phansmut in a post-coming out universe, I just kinda lost the motivation to write this.

But I hate abandoning fics, I know the feeling as a reader of one too many abandoned WIPs. I tried continuing but I started hating this fic, I never (still don’t tbh) understood how this ended up one of my popular ones. I can’t read back on this work because I can pinpoint the exact moment I lost inspiration/motivation and had no idea where the hell I was going with the fic lol, and wished I wrote those parts differently.

Then it took a whole pandemic for me to finally have free time off work so I decided to give this story another try. This resulted in the story having such a prominent shift from the beginning parts (to me anyway, a lot of you have reassured me that the story still flows well, thank you for that because I can’t bear to re-read and see things from my perspective lol). And I started having a bit more fun with it again, learning to write a bit more plotty things instead of pure smut.

I hope I did this fic some justice. It may not have been what I had in mind when I started it, but I can say I’m quite glad with how it turned out in the end :) For what’s originally meant to be only a smut work, it sure got me reflecting a lot lmao. I guess it’s because so much has changed in the past 2 years - like, imagine telling Me who was writing Chapter 1 that Dan would come out in a few months and confuse my whole conscience on writing phansmut lmao???

And thank you so much for still reading despite the long breaks and everything in between. All your interactions with the fic, every like, reblog and ask, were the main thing motivating me to even continue! It really does make me happy to see that there are so many of you who enjoy this (totally not worthy imo lol).

I don’t know what 2021 has in store in terms of fic writing, but I hope you stick around if I ever do come up with new works :) And if you have an idea you’d like to share with me, please do!! This fic wouldn’t have been born if not for a prompt after all :)

Thank you and I hope the remainder of 2020 will treat you kinder than the rest of the year had been <3 (wow this is a long end note lmao)

#dan the personal assistant #phan #Phanfic #phansmut #My fic

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no-heart-no-soul-t · 4 years ago

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IDK WHAT TO CALL THIS :)

Okay so. First time writing something.... don’t judge, I used Milli’s and mine names bc it was easier for me to write like that?

Also timeline is really bad because idk... jdadn first time writing a story QwQ

Whoever is going to read this I am sorry :)

pairing: Milli x WooYoung (love you @jaes-sweaterpaws <3)

genre: crack? fluff? IDK d sdskdsad

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First day of uni after holliday? Boring as hell.

That’s what went through Milli’s head when she woke up to her alarm blasting through whole apartment. She just turned it off and rolled over bed, snuggled to her blankets and tried to drift back to sleep. That’s when her roommate woke her up by splashing cold water on her. “Good morning sunshine.” Tami smiled at Milli and went out of the Milli’s room. To be exact she wasn’t happy by the way Tami woke her up and yelled at her “YAH! WHY DID YOU DO THAT?!”, and Tami yelled back “BECAUSE I DON’T WANT TO BE LATE LIKE LAST TIME!”. Milli went to do her morning routine. “I made you omelete, eat and I am going to go change,” Tami called at Milli from the kitchen.

The two finally went to uni. Milli is studying IT major while Tami is studying English major. Their schedules were so different, but always found time during lunch to talk with each other. Cheesy as always. They said their goodbyes in front of the main building and went to their classes.

Milli came to classroom all tired and dead on the inside she just put her laptop on the desk and laid her head down on her hands. Suddenly she heard someone pulling chair next to her and that startled her. When she looked up she saw a guy she has never seen in her classes.

“Oh, did I startle you? I am sorry,” says the guy with apologetic smile. She just stared at him. Why did she stare? First, because she never saw him. Second, he was so beautiful it hurt her on the inside.

“Are you okay? Did I scare you that much?,” he asked all concerned about her. “Ah oh no, I just- I have never seen you here before,” she said while scratching her neck. “Oh, right. I am new here. Me and my best friend changed uni’s. My name is WooYoung. Nice to meet you,” he said with a sweet smile while looking at her. “Milli. Is your friend also IT major?,” she asked while looking behind him. “Ah you have a beautiful name and no, he is English major. With dance on the side, well I have dance on the side too,” said with a wink her way. She blushed but then realization hit her “Oh! I have a friend in English major too.” “Really? What’s her name? I can text San to introduce himself so the four of us can sit together at lunch,” again that sweet smile. “Her name is Tamara, but she prefers Tami,” WooYoung took out his phone and started texting, “but, you want us to sit together at lunch? Why?,” she asked all confused. He looked at her beautiful green eyes and said, “Yeah? Why not? I just… you seem like a nice person. Plus you are the first one I am talking to in this uni who isn’t San. You don’t want to get to know each other?,” he asked all nervous, scratching his neck. “Ah no no it’s not like that,” she said while shaking her head, “it’s just that no one really wants to talk to me or Tami for some weird reason? I am just surprised that’s all,” again scratching her neck. He was going to say something but she cut him off - “We will surely join you and San for lunch,” she smiled. “Perfect!” he said all excited.

In the middle of lecture Milli’s dm’s on tumblr started blasting up. Tami and Milli prefer Tumblr because they found each other on it and became best friends thanks to that.

angelicdemontami: THE FOK angelicdemontami: HOW SOME HOT GUY JUST ASKED ME TO GO TO LUNCH W HIM? angelicdemontami: anD HE SAID U WILL BE THERE?! SPILL THE TEA FFS

jaes-sweaterpaws: is his name San? angelicdemontami: YES NOW SPILLDALDLSADL jaes-sweaterpaws: yah chill… his friend asked me to lunch with them but i told him you are also eng major like his friend

angelicdemontami: SO?! how he knows me or sndajpodôa

jaes-sweaterpaws: i told wooyoung your name and he texted san your name i guess??

angelicdemontami: BISH he doenst kno how i look wdym?!!

jaes-sweaterpaws: maybe he asked someone and they pointed at you?

angelicdemontami: k, makes sense...but still THE FOK?!!!!

jaes-sweaterpaws: chill out and concentrate on your lecture smh owo also cya at lunch uwu

angelicdemontami: imma kill ya :) he is so HOT

angelicdemontami: wait he lookin at me the FOK-------

jaes-sweaterpaws: going off bye byeee~~~

angelicdemontami: wAIT NO!

Milli closed Tumblr page while chuckling and started to take notes. She didn’t notice that WooYoung was looking at her whole time how she smiled at her screen while texting with Tami. After that Wooyoung’s Facebook chimed from new messages. When he opened them he saw they were from San who has a nickname “SanTan”, because let’s be real, his duality? Even WooYoung doesn’t understand that. Ironic, because San calls WooYoung “Sexy Performer”, San always says he is too sexy to stay alone.

SanTan: yo that girl Tami? she cute

SexyPerf: is she?

SanTan: yes god bless the girl u made friends with

SanTan: also… where we will meet?

SexyPerf: I should thank god for meeting Milli lol.. and Idk that pinkish coffee shop nearby?

SanTan: yessir!

Lecture ended and WooYoung leaned in to Milli, “Hey sooo… about lunch.. let’s go to that pinkish coffee shop nearby?,” “Sure! We love to go there. Almost no one goes in there,” “Perfect! See ya there!” WooYoung smiled and went out of classroom.

Lunch was already here and Milli and Tami were sitting at the coffee shop waiting for WooYoung and San. “So… how did you get to talk to WooYoung?,” Tami asked while sipping on her Iced Lavender Tea. “Psh. I was taking a nap on my desk like usual and he startled me by pulling the chair right next to me,” “You mean the chair that no one sits on?,” “Yes, exactly that one. And he apologised for startling me and we got to talk to each other and yeah somehow he asked me to go to lunch,” “hmm hmm.. oh there they are?,” Tami asked while looking out the window, habit she has while thinking about something.

WooYoung and San entered the coffee shop and looked around. San’s eyes found Tami and he nudged WooYoung and pointed to their table. When they sit down (WooYoung next to Milli, and San next to Tami), they greeted each other. “So… what should we get at this coffee shop?” WooYoung asked while looking around. “Depends what are your preferences,” Tami replied while munching on her baguette. Her dry humour present anywhere at anytime. “Hm… what are you having?,” San asked looking at what Tami had in front of her. “Four kinds cheese baguette with bacon, vanilla muffin and Iced Lavender Tea,” Tami answered looking down, refusing to look at San. “And what do you have?,” WooYoung looked at Milli. “I have ham and cheese sandwich, chocolate muffin and caramel macchiato,” she answered while looking at Tami who was very nervous. Waiter came to the table and asked the boys what they wanted. “I’ll have four kinds cheese baguette with bacon, vanilla muffin and Iced Americano,” San answered and after that WooYoung, “And I will have ham and cheese sandwich, chocolate muffin and also Iced Americano.” Waiter looked at them and then at Milli. She just shrugged and said, “I guess they believe us, not like you Brian.” Brian scoffed and said “Wait till Jae hears about you going on dates without telling him first place,” “It’s not a date. Also where is my BFF Jae?,” Milli asked while looking around. “I don’t know. You are his BFF, Milli, you should know,” Brian said while smirking and going away. She just scoffed and sipped her macchiato. “You know each other?,” San asked while looking at Brian who was already making their orders. “Yeah, we got to know each other during one party we were dragged to by older kids,” Tami answered while again looking out the window in thoughts, “and somehow we became friends with love-hate relationship,” she added and kept on munching on her food. “We just became best friends? Me and Jae, and Tami and Brian,” Milli also added while looking at her glass. Brian came with their orders and looked at Tami, “Hey, you okay angel?,” all concerned. “Oh? Yeah… just thinking about school stuff..,” Tami answered totally out of it. Everyone, except Tami, saw how San tensed after hearing Brian say “angel” to her. Brian looked at him with confused look and then back at Tami, “Well if you say so. I’ll bring you your tea to go,” Brian answered and went back to work after some students called him to take their orders.

They continued to talk to each other while eating. Everyone was having a good time, except Tami. I’ll just ask her later what happened, Milli thought.

After lunch they all went back to their classes. San and Tami had their next class together while WooYoung and Milli had separate.

While at class WooYoung texted San,

SexyPerf: yo, ask Tami for Millis facebook or num or somethin

SanTan: hmm why didnt u ask be4

SexyPerf: i forgot stfu can u do dat?

San sighed and nudged Tami’s arm which startled her and she looked at him with big grey eyes. “Sorry didn’t want to startle you. I just- WooYoung asked me to ask you for Milli’s sns or number,” “Oh no it’s okay I was just deep in thought,” she said with soft smile, “and yeah of course here’s her Instagram,” she said while writing Milli’s nickname on Instagram. San texted WooYoung Milli’s instagram and got only “thx” as reply. He shook his head and then realized he should ask for her contact info too. So he gently nudged Tami and smiled at her “Sorry, buuuut… can you give me also your contact info? I just… want to be friends with you and yeah..,” Tami looked at him all confused because no one ever asked for her contact info. But then she wrote at paper her Instagram and looked back at her laptop taking notes without saying anything. San just chuckled because he found it cute.

Meanwhile Tami’s Tumblr dinged with messages,

jaes-sweaterpaws: u gave san my ig?

angelicdemontami: yeah he said wooyoung asked for yo contact info

angelicdemontami: why?

jaes-sweaterpaws: bc wooyoung followed me and san also and i didnt give them my ig so i found it weird lol

angelicdemontami: ah yeah should have write u 1st sorry

jaes-sweaterpaws: nah is okay

angelicdemontami: wdy want to eat today:)

jaes-sweaterpaws: les go to that thai place at the end of street that just opened

angelicdemontami: YAY CaLL

jaes-sweaterpaws: should ask wooyoung if he and san want to join?

Tami looked at screen all nervous and thought about it.. Then she looked at San who was looking at his laptop screen taking notes.

angelicdemontami: yeah sure

After that she closed Tumblr tab and got back to taking notes.

WooYoung heard his phone vibrate with message. He looked it was from Milli on instagram and instantly opened it.

millispawspaws: hey wooooo! wanna join me and tami for food after uni w san?

WooYoung smiled while replying,

woosexyperf: yeah sure

woosexyperf: where?

millispawspaws: new thai place at the end of street

woosexyperf: sounds nice okay cya

millispawspaws: yay! cya!

This girl… WooYoung thought while texting San on FaceBook,

SexyPerf: Yo we going eat after uni

SanTan: huh ?

SexyPerf: milli texted me to join her and tami to that new thai place at end of strt

SanTan: ooooo okay cya

All classes have ended and WooYoung and San were waiting at the gate. After 10 minutes Milli came and apologised, “Sorry looks like it will be only three of us,” San looked at her and WooYoung asked, “Why? Where’s Tami?,” “She had to go to tutor someone. It came last minute. She said she is sorry…” after that they went to the restaurant and talked for an hour already. In the middle of conversation Milli’s phone flashed with incoming call from Tami.

“Yo Tami what-” “Milli come and take me home please,” Tami said while crying on the phone. “What happened? Where are you?” Milli all stressed asked while packing up. “I met Jake my ex while at the library and he… he made fun of me while kissing his new gf… and now I am a mess please just come and pick me up..” “I am coming don’t cry.” Milli stood up and just apologized and left the restaurant.

The next day Milli apologized again to the boys at the coffee shop. Tami came in, also apologized and sat next to San who pulled her closer and told her everything is gonna be okay.

~Time skip 6 months~

“Milli WAKE THE F UP,” Tami screamed at Milli who was still sleeping even thought it was already 10AM. “Why are you yelling, Jesus, it’s Saturday..” Milli answered still drowsy. “Did you forget our outing with WooYoung and San? We are supposed to set of at 1PM!,” “Oh SHIT!,” Milli screamed while running around apartment to get dressed and looking like a human being. They planned to go to the sea and chill there for five days, since school was closed down for some reconstruction or whatever. They already rented small cabin right next to the beach.

It was 12:30PM when they heard knocking on the door. Tami went to open it. When she opened it, WooYoung and San just went inside while saying “Wassup~”, she just shook her head. “Where’s Milli,” WooYoung asked while looking in to the kitchen. “Packing up, she, again, overslept,” Tami answered while punching San on the arm because he ruffled her hair. “Yah! Stop punching me every second of my life,” San said while sitting on the couch. She just rolled her eyes and went to her room for her bags. Meanwhile WooYoung went to Milli’s room, where he found her packing up bikinis. He went in and back-hugged her, “My sweetie pie again overslept, I see,” “Stop calling me that, and what I overslept tch,” she just continued to pack her things. WooYoung pouted at her.

When they came to the cabin Milli and Tami just ran in leaving bags with the boys, who just looked at each other and shook their heads. The cabin had four bedrooms, two on first floor, two on second floor, two bathrooms, one at each floor, and big living room attached with kitchen. First day was mostly about napping and eating.

On the Second day, they decided to go for a walk around the town. WooYoung held Milli’s hand the whole time during the walk with the excussion of “not getting lost.”

Third day, was beach fun? Tami and Milli woke up at 8AM to go to the beach, while San and WooYoung were still sleeping. It was 10AM when San and WooYoung woke up. When they came to the kitchen they saw a small note, “We went to the beaaaaaaach~~~~ come find us later uwu -Tami and Milli,” boys just shook their heads and went out to find them.

They found them, lying on the blankets, sunbathing. “Damn, they aren’t making it any easier,” San said while slowly going to them. WooYoung came and hugged Milli, who just screamed and smacked him on the arm, “What the HELL! Woo, I’ll kill you I swear,” and started chasing him around. They ended up in the sea just splashing water around and laughing. At some point, they ended up really close to each other. WooYoung was looking in to Milli’s green eyes, and slowly started to lean in. “What are you trying to do?...,” Milli just whispered while WooYoung pulled her closer. “Kiss you,” and he kissed her softly as if she was made of the softest glass.

When they parted Milli looked at WooYoung all confused. “Milli, I-,” WooYoung tried to say something but was caught off by Tami’s screaming, “LEAVE ME ALONE JAKE WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING HERE,”. Milli came out of water and went to Tami who was screaming and pushing at her ex, Jake. “LEAVE,” Tami screamed again. San was nowhere to be seen. “Tami, let’s just talk huh?,” “NO. You CHEATED on me because I DIDN’T want to sleep with you after only going out for two months!,” WooYoung came and asked, “What’s going on? Who the Hell are you?,” while looking at Jake who was holding Tami so strong she was sure she will have bruises. “It’s between me and Tami. Leave,” Jake said while trying to drag Tami away. Suddenly Jake was separated from Tami and was on the ground. “Touch her again and I will kill you,” San growled at Jake while going to hug Tami to his side. “Who are you? How dare you touch her?,” Jake coughed while standing up looking at San. San just smirked, “I am her boyfriend. Some problem with that?,” Jake looked at Tami who was just covering at San’s side. “No. Didn’t know she had someone.,” “The HELL. LEAVE Jake you hurt her more than enough,” Milli screamed at him and shoved him away. Jake, at the end, left without a word. When he was gone Tami just packed up and went back to the cabin. Took shower, changed and locked herself in her room.

Milli sighed when she came to the cabin with boys. “It was her ex that cheated on her?,” WooYoung asked. “Yeah.. after that, she didn’t want to date anyone or catch feelings for someone. That’s why she has that “hate” relationship with every guy she knows,” Milli said while going up the stairs to take shower and change and check on Tami.

“San, you okay?,” WooYoung looked at San who was pacing around nervously, “If I ever see him again nearby her I will just kill him,” San said, finally sitting down on a couch. “I just, love her just like you love Milli. But, I can understand she wouldn’t get together with me,” San said defeated, standing up again and going to bathroom to take shower first. He went straight to his room and locked himself up same as Tami.

Milli came down and found WooYoung sitting alone on a stool in kitchen, “Where’s San?,” she asked looking around. “Locked himself in the room,” “Oh, he and Tami are really similar,” Milli said with small chuckle. She sat next to him and.. silence. After five minutes of silence WooYoung spoke up, “Look Milli, I really, really like you- no, scratch that. I am in love with you Milli. And I want us to be together. So- Will you be my girlfriend?,” he asked while holding her hand looking deep in to her beautiful green eyes. She looked at him surprised, “I--, Woo I--,” “You don’t have to answer right now, but I hope for a yes,” he interrupted with sad smile, and that sad smile made Milli spill, “I love you too WooYoung I really do,” “Is that a yes?,” he looked at her surprised, full of expectations, “Yes, Youngie, I will be your girlfriend!,” and he took her head instantly in his hands and kissed her softly and full of love.

They didn’t hear small soft pit-patting on the floor but broke apart after, “So you two are finally together?”. They turned and saw Tami still crying and sniffing but also smiling at them, “Yes we are. But come here for cuddles,” Milli answered standing up and going to Tami. Tami backed up with hands up, “No, it’s okay… where’s San?,” “Locked up in his room,” WooYoung answered while hugging, together with Milli, Tami softly. Tami broke the hug and went to San’s room. “They should already confess their feelings,” Milli murmured. “Yeah, it’s really sad to see them going around each other and don’t confessing their feelings they have for each other for so long…,” WooYoung answered while back-hugging Milli. “But, now let’s just the two of us cuddle,” he whispered in to her neck, kissing it softly. “What about them?,” “They will figure something out… need time for themselves.”

When they came in to Milli’s room on the floor, WooYoung started kissing her neck softly and murmured, “Gosh, I just love how you smell all the time,” he turned her around and started kissing her on the lips. First softly, then it became hungry kiss full of passion. They ended on the bed, WooYoung on top of Milli taking his shirt off, smirking at her, “Now, let’s have some fun.”.

#ok #first time writing #its for milli mostly #fanfiction #wooyoung ff #ateez wooyoung #wooyoung #i am sorry #it doenst make any sense #dndnsa§d #wooyoung fanfiction #ateez wooyoung ff

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dorizardthewizard · 5 years ago

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TLNM musings, part 2

Okay, here I ramble about problems with the movie. Ended up adding more stuff since I first wrote this :’P

Screentime and characterisation of the other ninja:

One of the biggest complaints from fans... they're all introduced individually with very different personalities, they’re told they each have a special element they control, making you feel like they should each get some moment to shine and affect the plot of the movie, but then none of that happens. Ultimately you could take out all the ninja and the story would be the same, you don't even necessarily need them for Lloyd's character since his journey of reconnecting with his father and bringing his family together can still work without them. It's so sad because if you read and watch extra material, you can tell thought went into their personalities, but we never get to see this as they're all just lumped together, mostly there to support Lloyd's development.

For someone who hasn't seen the show, it must feel a bit off seeing characters with distinguished personalities and no payoff for it; take Zane for example. Imagine not knowing anything about the characters and seeing one of them is a robot, for some reason? You wonder why he's a robot, what significance that has for the plot and why it's important for his character (I mean they missed a big opportunity to develop Zane from always trying to fit in and seem like a “normal teenager” to accepting that he's different but that that doesn't mean he's less valid), but then this really specific characteristic is never expanded on except for comedy purposes. People probably thought “oh, guess it makes more sense in the show”, but this just detaches viewers and makes them feel like they're missing something if they haven't seen the show beforehand.

Sigh, still gotta give the crew credit for fitting in a load of little subtle details about the ninja, I had to rewatch it a couple of times because there were things I didn’t notice at first, like Kai sliding down a bannister in the Temple of Fragile Foundations and falling off :’D

Group dynamic:

Another thing that bothered me is that the movie isn't that good at making you care about them as a team. They're already established as friends but I wish there were more material showing us how much they care about each other. The Kai hug scene was 10/10 but then when Chen and the other cheerleaders started picking on Lloyd, nobody said or did anything? In merchandise it said Kai is a hothead who isn't afraid to speak up or stand up to people, then show it in the movie! Him and Nya should have been on the verge of tackling that guy to the floor! Ok, I can see Lloyd asking them not to get into fights as it makes people hate him even more and he probably feels guilty if one of the ninja gets into trouble because of him. This would still have given more emotional connection between the characters but we're never shown it, except in the novelisation where Cole tries to block Lloyd from his locker so he doesn't see the insult written on it, I think. But again, we shouldn't have to read/ watch extra material for that.

Instead of moments showcasing the ninja’s friendship and close bonds, we got the opposite- everyone turned on Lloyd incredibly quickly for one mistake. Sure, it was a pretty big one and resulted in Garmadon taking over the city and their mechs being wrecked, but Lloyd was the only one doing anything about Garmadon at the time and he didn't exactly know what the consequences of using the ultimate weapon were; it's not like he knew it could potentially hurt his friends. In fact, how did the ninja know he used it anyway? That would mean they already knew about it and what it could do, yet Lloyd was not told? In which case, how can they blame him?? Damn it Wu, why couldn't you just tell Lloyd that using the weapon would unleash a cat that could destroy the city, instead of vaguely saying the weapon can be dangerous in the wrong hands. That's taking too many pages from TV Wu's book!

Honestly, it's like the ninja were just one character either shunning Lloyd or supporting him, depending on what the plot needed :/ That scene where they're talking with Garmadon while carrying him through the jungle really rubbed me the wrong way because first, no one seemed to care that Lloyd is so snippy because he's been forced to work with the man who made his life hell, and second they joke about Lloyd with that very same person and imply they don't respect Lloyd as leader, as Jay says he doesn't usually want to listen to him when he's talking? What??

Lloyd and Garmadon’s relationship:

I mentioned this in part 1, but they really didn’t execute this well- I feel like they had so much fun playing up Garmadon being the worst dad in the world that they forgot to give him redeemable qualities. It took me a second viewing to realise his relationship with Lloyd was actually pretty messed up, because they played off his despicableness as comedic and glossed over it by suddenly giving him a flashback to make it seem like he’s sorry. They wanted to go for the father-and-son-have-issues-but-reconnect story, and had Lloyd say “I wish we didn’t have to fight all the time” in his emotional ending, but that’s a line usually present in a daddy-issue story where both have a part to blame and there's issues with communication. In this, though? Lloyd did nothing wrong! It was just Garmadon being trash, and there wasn't even a particular scene of him recognising and apologising for his actions- not the bit about driving Misako away, but how he treated Lloyd after.

The message is all mucked up - hoping to find some good in neglectful parents is just gonna get you hurt, and in a story like this it would make more sense for the protagonist to realise they don't need validation from this guy, shouldn't feel like they have to keep connected with toxic relatives just because they're family, and that they should focus on the friends and family who actually love them (although, whether Lloyd's friends were even portrayed as liking him is a different story). I mean, Koko could just teach him to throw and catch! Does he have to have two parents just for that?

Tone and humour:

I think another main reason this movie didn't do as well was its more childish tone and dialogue; unlike the previous two movies, it was marketed at younger children. One of the main reasons TLM and LB were so successful is because of the self-aware jokes that could actually be enjoyed by adults too, while in this movie I may have properly laughed only a couple of times. Plus, in its effort to connect with kid's humour it just got cringy in some parts, like the Ultimate Weapon compilation. It would have been funny if it was ironic, like Amazing World of Gumball style, but it just didn't come across like that, so I can see why many jokes fell flat for older audiences.

People probably had different expectations for the overall tone as well- everyone loved the previous LEGO movies because of their constant barrage of action, witty jokes and a ton of references. This was never the selling point of Ninjago, but TLNM didn’t manage to capture the show’s dramatic style and deep lore-driven plot either.

The writers:

Okay last thing. This movie had three directors, six producers, six screenwriters and seven people working on the story. Compared to most animated movies, that's a lot, and its shows. It feels like they had a few different ideas and themes and couldn't quite patch them together, with vague messages like “looking at things from a different point of view” being thrown in as well to try and link it up. I guess at the end of the day, this is a father-son story, and that makes it very difficult to fit in a power-of-friendship plot at the same time, but still. Also, the shifting plot and ideas is really clear in the trailers, I mean half the stuff there wasn't even in the movie, it's as if the entire story was changed!

Final verdict? I think an overall theme with this movie is that the writers wanted to overhaul Ninjago to introduce it to new viewers, but also wanted to keep the fans happy so shoehorned in lots of elements from the show without giving them enough development. This just disappoints fans and alienates general audiences, which is a problem since Ninjago doesn’t have a huge following already backing it up like LEGO Batman did, and could have been the pilot for more original LEGO lines making it to the big screen. It was a technically amazing movie, with beautiful animation and visuals, an epic soundtrack and stunning voice acting, but it was also such a waste of potential.

The only other thing we can do is think about how it could have gone differently, so here's some of my ideas :'D

NOT using the deleted time travel plot. I know that after being disappointed in a movie you welcome any alternative, but giant mechs were already a big deviation from the ninja theme; flinging in time travel as well would be too much for non-show watchers. Plus, I thought we were all complaining about how time travel in Ninjago always just messes things up :'P

Also not following the show closer. We have over 10 seasons of the show, the whole point of a movie is giving a fresh take; using a giant snake or the Overlord possessing Garmadon again would just be boring.

Delete the first act? One of the best parts of the secret high school heroes trope is seeing how they juggle both lives, if you're gonna drop it after half an hour there's not much point of it being there.

Could instead just have Garmadon attacking again, the last invasion attempt being ages ago. Maybe the ninja rediscover a rich history of elemental masters protecting Ninjago when Wu decides to get a new team together to fight the new threat?

Make it about learning master building instead so they build their mechs at the end, and then gain elements in a sequel?

Or don't mention anything about elements and have every ninja individually go through an obstacle to obtain an elemental weapon, then they all lose them but don't know they're not necessary, so it's actually a surprise that the power is inside them? Everyone gets a sort of true potential moment?

Ninja having to warm up to Garmadon's son, so we have a plot of Lloyd slowly gaining their respect and becoming leader?

Higher stakes at the end, make the Shark Army more threatening and have them turn on Garmadon using Meowthra, so there's still an intense climax of the ninja fighting the army before Lloyd reaches Meowthra and gets his emotional ending?

Get rid of the live action sequence, or make it fit the message of the story more?

Feel free to add any ideas/ thoughts!

#ninjago #ninjago movie #lego ninjago movie #RIP lego cinematic universe v_v #my posts

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booksncoffee · 5 years ago

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in which cleo pranks harry

It’s a particularly slow day at Ward’s Bookstore and I’m bored out of my mind. It doesn’t help that I’m alone today (I’m always alone this lately because Adam’s a part timer now so he’s here only three times a week and I can’t seem to find anyone that could replace him because let’s face it, no one comes close to Adam) and I’ve got no one to talk to. But on the bright side, there’s only about an hour left before I can finally close up.

I pick up the book I’ve been reading but put it back down when an idea pops into my mind. More like a devious plan to get back at Harry who threw me under the bus a few weeks ago in front of our parents. We told them that we’re moving in together and as expected, that got our parents off of our backs about getting married. But it brought up the question “why did it take you guys so long to do this?” and instead of telling them that we didn't want to rush into things, Harry told our parents that I was the one who didn’t want to do it, that I wasn’t ready to take the next step forward. Which wasn’t exactly a lie, but still.

I thought as soulmates we were supposed to have each other’s back and lie for the other when needed.

The rest of the night, I had to sit through a lecture from my mum who tried to convince me that I shouldn’t be scared when it comes to my relationship with Harry. We’re soulmates, bound to be together for the rest of our lives, so there’s nothing to be scared of. Easy for her to say because the moment she and my dad found each other, they’ve been inseparable ever since. Unlike Harry and I who spend two decades of our lives hating each other because we thought that’s what our tattoos wanted us to feel towards the other.

Anyway, that’s beside the point.

The point is this: I’m gonna get back at Harry and I’ve just thought of the most brilliant way of doing so. It’s evil, but I want to do it. Harry is never going to see this coming.

I reach for a permanent marker pen, the one with the fine tip, and pull up the sleeve of my shirt to reveal the empty arm. Cautiously, I try to imitate the tattoo on my other arm. Once done, I hold my arm up in front of me, taking in my handiwork.

Alex Montgomery.

I just tattooed the name of the love interest of the book I’m reading on my arm and I can’t wait to see the look on Harry’s face when he sees it.

/////

Harry greets me outside of the bookstore. I have just finished locking up when he appears behind me, wrapping his arm around my waist and pressing a kiss on the back of my head.

“Hey,” he says.

I turn around and loop my arms around his neck, standing on my tiptoes to kiss him on the lips. “Hey,” I whisper back.

“I bought dinner,” Harry holds up a brown paper bag, a familiar logo in front of it.

“My favourite,” I grin.

It’s from the Mexican restaurant that opened a couple of months ago. We’ve been frequenting that place since its opening, as do other people. We haven’t gotten a new restaurant in a hot minute so when one opens up, everyone in town decides to give it a visit. Or two. Or ten, like Harry and I.

“I know,” Harry nods. “I think everyone in town knows how much you love it. The moment I walked into the restaurant, they knew our orders immediately.”

Harry leads me to his car and together, we make our way back to Harry’s -- our -- flat. We have our dinner in the living room in front of the television like we usually do and when we’re done, we leave the plates on the coffee table since we're both feeling extra lazy tonight. Harry leans against the arm of the couch and I lean my body against his side. He wraps an arm around me and I snuggle closer.

I’m about to drift off when I hear Harry say, “Cleo.”

My eyes spring open. The tone of Harry’s voice tells me that I’m in trouble. And so does his suddenly stiff body. “Yes…?”

Harry holds up my arm in front of my face, waving the fake tattoo that I forgot about -- I blame Harry and the Mexican food he got for me. I’m pleasantly surprised that the marker didn’t bleed and the tattoo looks very much real hours later.

“Alex Montgomery,” Harry says the name out loud. There’s an edge to his voice and I almost tell him that this is a prank but you don’t straightaway tell people it’s a prank if you plan on pranking them, do you? “Who… Do you know about this?”

I shift around so I’m facing him. “I--Uh. No, I didn’t know it’s there.” I pretend to eye the tattoo, brows furrowing. “You don’t think… Do you think it could be my soulmate?”

At that, Harry’s eyes widen and his entire body turns immobile. It’s like someone has just dumped a bucket of ice cold water over his head. But then something snaps in him and he gets up from the couch and begins his pacing.

“What kind of name is that,” Harry growls. “Alex Montgomery. Sounds like a douche name if you ask me.”

I fight the urge to laugh. “He didn’t really have much choice with his name, did he?”

Harry’s eyes cut to me and he scowls. He definitely does not appreciate my humour at the moment. “He can’t be… He can’t be your soulmate, can he? He must be your enemy. With a name like that--”

“Cool it with his name, babe.”

“It just… This can’t be happening.” Harry exhales. Shock disappears from his face and I see a mixture of feelings replacing it but one stands out: worry. My heart aches at the sight in front of me. God, I’m the worst soulmate ever.

Before this could go on for a second longer, I get up from the couch and make my way to Harry. I place my hand on his chest, “Hey, look at me.”

He shakes his head, refusing to meet my eyes.

“Harry.”

He reluctantly meets my eyes and raises an eyebrow.

“I’m gonna need you to promise me something.”

“Anything,” he says, desperation evident in his voice.

I place one hand on his neck, my fingers toying with his hair. “Don’t get mad at me.” Harry shoots me a quizzical look. “It’s a prank.”

“A what?”

“I wrote the name down with a permanent marker pen. This tattoo is me getting back at you for what you did a few weeks ago. It was an ass--” hole move I realise that now, is what I wanted to say but I don’t get to finish my sentence as Harry presses his lips against mine. I expect him to push me away, not closer. But I welcome the kiss anyway, deepening it.

When he pulls away, he says, “Fuck, Cleo. I was so scared back there. Fuck. Just don’t do it to me again. You hear me?”

I nod. “You’re not mad?”

“Oh I am, but I’m also relieved.” Harry doesn't talk about it much, but I know it bothers him how I only have one tattoo. He worries that one day another tattoo will pop up and I'll realise that he's not my soulmate after all.

Guilt surges through me and I sigh, “I’m the worst soulmate ever, aren’t I?”

Harry lets out a chuckle. “Nah, you’re still the best but if you pull a prank like that ever again I might have to reconsider that.”

“Deal.”

“Also, Alex Montgomery. Why does that name sound familiar?”

“It’s from the book I’ve been reading.”

Harry takes a step back and curses under his breath. Then he laughs to himself. “Of course, why am I such an idiot?”

“Nah, you’re my idiot.”

Harry rolls his eyes but he wraps his arms around my waist and kisses me until the only thing I can think of is him.

#1dff #haow #haow drabble #:)

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casually-inlove · 5 years ago

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aah i agree im vry disappointed in this chapter ! like its good like usual, but its kind of a let down after the last 5 chapters... ht rly exposed himself minutes before, and comedy aside, MGS answered him by ignoring him, and then saying "were not friends, were not as close as you think we are". it must have been hurtful for HT, its basically a rejection of recognizing HT vulnerabilities. and its totally In character for MGS to say this, so im not disappointed by it 1/?

i mean HT lay his heart down for Mo to see and theyve known each other for 15 DAYS, its too soon for anybody and especially for Mo who have mistrust problems to respond in the same way ? so running away and deflecting the declaration is cool, i wasnt excepting a "ill never abandon u!!" lol. but then HT being cool with this rejection and having a slapstick comedy just after doesnt feel right. mb show HT swallowing and being disheartened, and then put his usual facade and only then have comedy 2/?

would have been good, bc we would have known "oh ht is actually hurt by MGS reaction but doesnt know how to say it, so he plays it cool and change the subject bc hes still not at ease with being vulnerable". a realistic situation would have been "ht tried to be vulnerable but it was too soon, too much for mo who rejected him, so it confirmed ht biased thinking that showing vulnerabilities is bad and it will prevent ht to be vulnerable in front of someone in the near future". 3/?

i mean it could have been a nice although sad conclusion for this mini-arc, especially since ht have been grieving (?) his mother just this morning. a little step back, and then smth else happen and cause ht to crack completely but then mo is able to respond present and its a step forward. ok im daydreaming but that would have been climatic lol. instead this..ah i dont know i feel cheated, i know its ox' work but still haha ! like when they do an abrupt change of scene after an emotional page 4/

its a trick ox use often and after 300 chapters it feels old n cheap. when u engage in a emotional scene, u cant just do "oops i change my mind!!" and put slapstick comedy or ignore totally what just happened and dont have a progression. u have to stay on this road : u cant put traumatizing backgrounds and mafia affairs and mature problems (kidnapping, mother being threatening into prostitution,etc) n just.. not stick with it and making ur characters not traumatized by it and just 'lol comedy'.

sry im kind of monopolizing ur askbox lol, i guess im kind of frustrated ! it just the last chapters were so good and it was a while since ox use this cheap trick of not going through an emotional scene that i kind of forgot how terrible they were at handling transition between drama and comedy. theyre a good artist all in all (or i wouldnt be this disappointed!!), but they have this failing in their writing an it drives me nuts each time lmao. haa i hope next chapter will be better...5/5

Hell yeah, DEFINITELY, that sums up my thoughts. Also, you don't have to apologize, it was an interesting read and I can tell that you feel strongly about it. While I can’t say that I’m flat-out disappointed, as I wrote in my original post, I’m definitely feeling lukewarm and indifferent about the recent ch.

OX touched upon a few serious matters a couple of chapters before: namely She Li’s fucked up goading and the way it unsettled He Tian -- unsettled in no joking manner as follows from his reaction. Then we get He Tian swearing to beat up anyone who dares bully Mo, and the whole profound monologue from the previous chapter. Just as you say, He Tian truly laid himself bare there. One could argue that He Tian listed the reasons he was enamoured with Mo, or one could argue that he subtly commented on the milieu he grew up in, or one can even read it as He Tian admitting/reflecting on his flaws out loud. There are many ways to construe this scene, each of them is extremely meaningful. Not to mention it took HT visible effort to say these things out loud.

The problem which both you and I noticed is that OX left this mini-arc/mini-subplot unresolved. Instead, they abruptly switched to comedic relief. Much like you, I wasn’t expecting a big reaction from Mo -- no grand verbal declarations at very least. What I expected was a panel (maybe a close up of Mo’s face as I mentioned in my original post) that indicated he actually HEARD what HT told him, that it gave Mo some food for thought.

As you mention, Mo getting disconcerted and doing the tsun-tsun escape is fairly in character for him. Still, a panel like this would have been very welcome to emphasize his confusion and to justify him not gracing the other boy with an answer, ignoring HT showing his underbelly (which is something that doesn't come easy for him, as we readers know). Okay, sure, OX handled it differently this chapter -- we get Mo silently running away and blurting out the first comeback he could think of. No problem. It works to show that HT’s words had an effect on him, albeit it’s much less pronounced, than, say, the Aquarium scene -- again one would have to wonder why: HT’s “don’t abandon me” is just as strong, if not stronger, than “I’m afraid you’ll forget me”, so it follows that Mo should have been just as affected.

The problem is the way an emotionally charged moment quickly fizzled out into comedy. As you said, Mo blurting out “we are not friends, we are not familiar enough, so I don’t care what you think (of me)!” SHOULD have hit HT harder. Just minutes before we had HT being genuinely disturbed by the idea of someone looking to intentionally hurt Mo, seeking physical comfort, being disquieted by the idea of getting abandoned and losing someone he likes, confessing that he admires the other boy -- yet when Mo utters yet another curt rejection of sorts, we are not shown HT’s reaction, which, logically, should have been there.

And all of that emotional build-up is cheapened by an accidental dick slap comedy.

Indeed, showing HT being hurt (disquieted? deflated?) and then putting on a cool guy mask, and ONLY then switching to a slapstick humour would have been more appropriate. It wouldn’t have taken a big or an overly dramatic scene either -- just, IDK, show HT’s eyes widening, or his throat clicking, or his posture slumping, anything to indicate that Mo’s words affected him -- that the whole thing mattered to him. Otherwise, it leaves a bad taste in one’s mouth: “so Imma confess to the person I like and swear to protect them and beg them to put up with me -- oh! forget anything serious that I said, Imma touch some dick now”. While I don't have an issue with comedy coming into focus again, I do wish it hadn't been this abrupt. Had there been a better transition between these scenes, there wouldn't be this "lol jk" vibe that I’m getting.

So yeah, I, too, feel a little cheated. OX certainly has an issue with drama-comedy transitions, which are sort of hit-and-miss for me. Sometimes they work well to alleviate the grave mood, other times they appear to be out of place. The recent chapter is the latter case. Dangling a possibility of climatic resolution for the subplot and then intentionally subverting it just doesn’t work in favour of the plot here. It cheapened the emotional part and made the comedy feel much less fun for me. Of course, no one says that writing is an easy task. Plenty of mangakas, for instance, work with writers to strengthen their script and plots, so it’s challenging when a single person is responsible for both drawing and planning the story. OX is undoubtedly doing a tremendous job. Still, I wish they wouldn’t stick to using the old trick this monastically because it's becoming a trite writing device and works against them on occasion. It’s totally fine to keep the comic light-hearted yet it’s not good to ignore the needed dramatic development.

#19 days #long post #anonymous #ask #q&a time

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neoarchipelago · 5 years ago

Text

Bridegroom's oak tree (John wick x reader part two)

A/N: here's the final part! This was long and complicated guys but hey ! Hope you guys enjoy it.

Request by: @cynic-spirit (request in the first part)

Part one

Word count : 3 983

Warnings: blood?

___________

John arrived home, dropping his jacket on the couch. He reached for the bar, and served himself a glass of bourbon. He sipped on his cup thinking about the letter. Should he read it? Should he open up a past hope that he had long ago buried away? The cup in his hand he walked up the stairs to his office. He walked in, closing the door behind him, and sat down on his leather office chair. He sipped on his cup again. Looking down at the letter on his desk. He sighed, putting down his cup, and finally holding up the letter into his hand.

He finally decided himself and opened the letter. He read it, a small smile on his lips. Klaus had kept his word until the last day on the job. He had sent him the letter that finally answered his and another one telling him his goodbyes, wishing him as much happiness as he had since John had helped him. He had, in post scriptum, told him that the beautiful lady who answered him also lived in New York and that the tree had finally worked his full magic. John smirked, and started to read the other letter, in a beautiful black lettering. It was clean, perfectly written, in a very poetic style. His eyes scanned the letter a few times before looking at the signature.

(Y/n) (y/l/n). The name sounded sweet. He thought for a minute about his next move. This woman had recently answered him, she must be interested. But was John as interested as before? Was he willing to go look for this girl, and how would things go? After all his life had changed and the risk of having someone in your life was even bigger than before. He had been willing to fall for someone before, taking all the chances he had and protect the woman who was willing to share his life. His life had already been dangerous but he was the Baba yaga. John leaned back on his chair and thought for a minute.

His curiosity was killing him, he felt like he needed to at least see the girl who had picked his letter. All he needed, was to find a girl with that name in New York. It shouldn't be too hard after all for the Mafia's Boss.

________

You could feel your heart pounding in your chest. You felt lost in this man's eyes and the way he looked at you. He seemed to look through you, a protective look on his face yet severe.

"It's me." He said in a smirk.

He seemed older than you, but it only made him even more attractive. His cologne made you want to let yourself drop into his arms, and you mentally cursed at your weakness. After all you didn't even know that man!

"I-I..I didn't think anyone… would answer actually." You said shyly, trying to control your heart rate.

"Me neither to be honest." He spoke, his voice sending shivers down your spine.

Curiosity peaked, however, at his words. You looked at him with a confused look.

"Why wouldn't anyone answer your letter? It was beautiful, and perfectly witten." You said, your shyness flying away.

___________

John had finally been able to find the woman who had wrote him a letter. He has sent his men through New York and ordered them to find her, but in total discretion. She had been the most wanted girl in town for 24 h before John had finally found her. She was a teacher in a suburban high school and he had access to her work application. The picture made him smile, he had seen beautiful woman who had tried real hard to become pretty but this woman looked like a goddess effortlessly. Had he been this lucky?

John had been awake throughout the following night, pacing back and forth in his house. Was he to just go see her? Was she sincere in the letter, and would she be interested in him? How would she react to him being a mafia lord? No. This was much further into the future. No point in thinking about it so soon. John made up his mind as the hour of sunrise came near. He was going to go see her.

It had been exactly what he'd done. The next day he decided to show up at her school and talk to her. He waited for the classes to be over before going to her classroom. He froze at the entrance as he reached the open door. You were there, softly singing a tune, swaying your hips as you walked in between the desks. When he had knocked on the door and saw the shocked look on your face he felt guilty to interrupt such a peaceful moment. He was rewarded by your beautiful (e/c) eyes staring at him and then looking away as you blushed.

Maybe was it that attraction a predator had towards his prey that made him walk forward as you both spoke a few words. Watching intensely as he could feel your shyness but also your curiosity towards him. The kind smile you harboured made him want to do anything so it would never go away. John felt attracted to you, feeling some weird need to wrap his arms around you and keep you safe. And then you had questioned him. He thought your confused expression was absolutely adorable as you asked him why didn't he thought his letter would be answered. As you complimented it.

"How about I tell you, as we get coffee?" He asked.

He worried to have gone too fast as you quickly looked panicked, but quickly relaxed at your answer with a soft smile.

"Oh yes! I just have to quickly grab all those tests and get my things, I apologise i'll be quick!" You had said in a hurried voice, already running around trying to grab all the papers.

John smirked at you as he watched your body sway through the classroom, patiently waiting.

____________

You were getting ready for dinner, spinning around in front of your bedroom mirror. You and John had been seeing each other for four weeks now, you had exchanged numbers and talked almost all day long. You were delighted to find out your common love for books and dogs. John was such a gentleman with you. The thought made you blush. You remembered your first coffee and diner, the way he looked at you protectively, as if you were the most precious thing he had. You liked the way he looked serious yet had such a great humour. It was impossible to deny the attraction you felt towards him, physically and mentally.

You smoothed out your little red dress that almost reached your knees, and took a last glance at the mirror before walking out of your room. You took your phone and smiled at John's text. He was already waiting for you downstairs. You hurried up, grabbing your bag on the way out. You walked down the stairs of your apartment building, a small smile on your lips. You felt lucky to find a man like John, who you enjoyed spending time with and felt connected to.

You reached the door and pulled it open, revealing your prince charming and his mustang. But this time was different. You watched as John was on the phone, clearly looking angry. He was speaking in what you assumed was Russian, since he told you that he came from Belarus. You slowly walked up to him, leaving a certain space between you two, allowing him to keep a bit of privacy. You had already seen John angry when he sometimes talked about his business which you still didn't really know about. But this time he looked furious, almost, murderous.

You watched him pace slowly next to his car as he spoke darkly into the phone. It should have scared you, the way he looked so dangerous, but a small shiver ran down your spine and all you wanted was to jump into his arms. Yes, you were intoxicated, the man had you wrapped around his little finger.

Your breath hitched as he suddenly stopped in front of you, looking at you with the darkest gaze you ever seen him give you. You felt captivated by his eyes, like a doe in front of headlights. His dark voice still angrily spoke in russian but this time with a much deeper tone. The frown he harboured made you want to run to him but you were frozen in place.

He finally hung up, his eyes never leaving you. He walked up to you slowly as you swallowed hard, looking up at him.

"Is there something wrong John?" You asked in a small worried voice.

He sighed looking at you, and shook his head. His arms wrapped themselves around you, pulling you in. You gladly accepted the embrace you had been craving as you close your eyes, letting your hands rest on his chest. You felt him press his lips on top of your head as you hummed his cologne, feeling safer than ever in the man's powerful arms.

"Nothing darling. Just work." John's raspy voice rang, as you felt the vibrations in his chest.

He pulled away, a small smirk on his lips as you smiled brightly at him. His eyes roamed over you and you could see his gaze shift to a much darker one. You felt your temperature rise just from the look he gave you. He opened the passenger door of his car, his arm still around your waist protectively. His eyes never left you as you sat down on the seat and he walked to the other side of the car, sitting in the driver's seat.

You were headed to a restaurant John had chosen for you tonight. You had ended up taking turns in choosing your next dinner, coffee or date location but John had called you this morning, apologising, and asking you to let him choose a place this one time. You had complied not really minding, after all, all you wanted was to see John.

"I'm sorry you had to see this (y/n), I… hope I didn't scare you." John said, making you look at him.

He kept his eyes on the road, but let his hand reach yours. You squeezed it softly reassuring him.

"It's perfectly fine. I'm not scared of you John." You said in a soft tone.

You could almost see his body lose some tension as your words reached him. Why would you be afraid of him? That was such a silly thought. Well John was maybe a scary looking man, but you did not feel scared of him one second. You watched the landscape as he retrieved his hand. Something felt off tonight. John was tensed, clearly angry at something, but you figured it out it couldn't be against you since every time his eyes fell on you his expression softened.

You finally reached your location, a beautiful fancy restaurant. It was crowded, another thing that surprised you since John didn't really like crowded places. While you were lost in thoughts John had already reached your side and opened the car door for you. You stepped out, being careful not to trip with your black heels. You immediately felt John's arm around your waist again. Yes something was off. He had always been protective of you as if he was afraid something would make you vanish at any moment, but tonight he didn't even try to hide it.

You still leaned into him walking inside the restaurant. The place was beautiful, soft classical music played in the back and everything looked… expensive. You reached the entrance and the waiter smiled at you two.

"Mr Wick, please follow me to your table." The man said.

You walked behind the waiter, intertwining your fingers with John's, trying to relieve some of the tension you could still feel. You finally reached a table, in the back of the restaurant, further away from any other table. It was set for two, and was clearly big enough for six. You notice the two chairs had been placed close to each other instead of in front of each other.

You walked to your seat, John helping you with your chair as you whispered a small 'thank you' while furiously blushing. The waiter didn't wait long to leave, leaving you and John alone at the table. You could still see something was bothering him, and you could keep it together anymore.

"John…" you called softly.

He turned to you, looking at you intensely. Even if his expression softened, he still looked worried.

"What's going on?" You whispered, knowing he heard you clearly.

He took a sharp breath looking around first before letting his eyes fall on you again, his eyes locking with yours.

"Look… (y/n)... I need to ask you something very important. It might sound extremely weird though." He spoke, his voice low and deep, making you lean closer to him.

"Ask me then." You answered in a playful tone, trying to light up the mood.

John smirked at you for a second before his serious expression fell back into place.

"I want to take you home tonight." He said, looking directly into your eyes.

You stared at him, feeling yourself blush at the idea. You were unable to say anything for a few seconds, your mind racing over the idea and possibilities.

"I just need you to stay at my house tonight. You don't have to sleep with me. Just… come home with me tonight." John spoke quickly again.

Now confusion settled in. He wasn't trying to move your relationship to a new level he was trying to keep an eye on you. You didn't feel angry at him, simply confused.

"But… why?" You asked, frowning a bit.

John sighed again.

"It's.. complicated. I swear I'll explain everything tomorrow… but please. I promise I won't force myself onto yo-"

"I know you won't John!" You interrupted him.

He looked taken aback but didn't say anything. He simply looked at you, a small pleading look on his face.

"(y/n) please…"

You had never seen him like this. You wanted to know more, the truth, but you felt like you needed to accept the offer to reach that. You still tried one last time to make him speak.

"Are you trying to protect me?" You asked, a small worried look on your face that made John slightly panic.

Of course he was. His reaction had told you everything you needed to know. You knew his business wasn't safe. Many times you had met and he had been hurt, cuts bruises and sometimes worse. He always played it off, joking about them, saying he took part in some sports combats. You clearly knew he lied to you, trying not to scare you. There was something more and the fear of discovering it was nothing compared to the fear of not knowing.

"You are, aren't you?" You said again, in a lower voice, now clearly worried, not for you, but for John's safety.

He had seemed to deal with a lot while he didn't took care of you and now he wanted to protect you too. You felt like you were a bother to him, risking his own safety because he wanted to take care of you.

"Hey…(y/n) don't be scared, I'm not letting anyone touch you." John was now serious, his murderous gaze back again as he held your hand.

"What about you John? I'm worried about you…" you whispered again, looking at him directly.

He smiled, bringing your hand to his lips, kissing your fingers.

"Don't worry about me darling. Just please, stay home with me tonight." He said in a softer tone.

You quickly nodded breathing in and out, trying to control your anxiety.

"Alright. I'll go with you. Can we just stop at my house to grab some stuff?" You asked, glad that there wasn't school for the next two days.

John nodded while smirking at you. You finally saw him relax, and you did the same, finally being able to let go completely. There was still a lot to talk about, but you were patient, you'd wait. As long as you were both safe. However even if the night played on a bit more peacefully than it had started, something still felt off. A gut feeling perhaps that you should have listened to.

Dinner went on smoothly, the conversation falling back smoothly in between you two. You had to be honest with yourself, you felt excited and relieved to be spending the night at John's house.

When you finally walked out of the restaurant the night breeze made you shiver. You were glad that you were stopping at your house before going home with John. You mentally scolded yourself for not bringing a jacket with you.

The ride home was joyful. You and John talking about everything and anything, you playfully asking him to watch a movie with him tonight, as if it were a mere sleepover. John parked in front of your building, and just as fast as you had forgotten about it, the odd feeling came back. You felt something was off again. You both stepped out of the car, as you tried to push away that feeling, thinking about how silly you were acting.

"I'm coming up with you (y/n)." John spoke behind you.

You nodded, not wanting to discuss this, feeling like you would have asked him to come in anyway if he didn't propose.

John walked closely behind you as you two walked up the stairs to your apartment. The feeling grew as you got closer and closer to your apartment. Maybe was it because John was with you? You shrugged it off again. Turning the key to open the door made your heart race, and you felt silly for feeling so nervous. You opened the door to a perfectly normal and peaceful apartment, exactly as you left it a few hours earlier. You sighed smiling up at John.

"Make yourself comfortable I'll try to be quick" you said with a smile.

John smiled back at you as he stood by the door. You quickly glanced back to your closed bedroom door, where you had to pick up some clothes. And then you froze. Closed? You hadn't closed your door before leaving your apartment. You never did. Your heart was pounding in your ears as you quickly spun around a panicked look on your face. John immediately noticed, and his face instantly changed. You slowly walked to your small kitchen table as you spoke, trying to keep your voice from shaking as the tears already stung your eyes.

"Oh by the way, let me make you coffee first!" You said, surprised you managed to sound happy.

As you started a John and John back at you you grabbed a pencil and some sticky notes you were thankful for forgetting on the kitchen table. You quickly wrote something, as John walked up to you.

"Alright then, black with no sugar."

John's voice was perfectly normal, a total contrast to his expression and attitude. The way he quickly picked up on the fact you two couldn't say anything suspicious only reassured the idea that his job wasn't so normal. He took the note in his hand and his expression changed one last time. The look he gave you made you shiver. It was terrifying. He looked around quickly before handing you back the note, while mouthing 'bathroom, lock yourself' to you. You nodded feeling utterly panicked as you walked to the bathroom as silently as you could. You heard John turn on your coffee machine behind you as you entered the room and locked the bathroom door. You were trying to keep your breathing down as you looked down at the note.

'my bedroom door wasn't closed'

You jumped as you heard the sound of things breaking. You took off your heels, and tried to stay as quiet as possible. You heard your front door open notifying you that more people were coming in and your blood ran cold. Your first thought was on John. You were petrified, unable to help him even if you wanted to. You managed to keep a bit of self control remembering how many times you've seen John all messed up but alive. You'd never thought you'd hope that the man you had fallen in love with, because yes you loved John, turned out to be a cold blooded killer, but right now that's all you hoped. You wanted him alive and safe.

When gunshots ran through the apartment you let yourself fall down to your feet, finally letting your tears roam free. You still did everything to stay quite as you silently cried. It all suddenly stopped. You couldn't hear anything anymore but your heart pounding loudly in your ears. Your lungs burnt from the silent tears and the panic. You held your breath as you heard someone walk up to the bathroom door.

"(y/n), it's me, please open the door."

You let out a shaky breath as you heard John's voice through the door. You quickly stood and opened the door. You froze looking up at him. He was covered in blood and even if you hoped it wasn't his you still felt your stomach turn at the sight. You must have looked panicked again because he tried to soothe you.

"Please.. darl-…(y/n), don't be afraid of me… I'll never hurt you." He spoke clearly sounding worried too.

You stepped aside letting him walk into the room. He walked in making sure not to open the door too much and closing back behind so you wouldn't have to witness anything at all. He still stood by the door however, not trying to reach up to you.

"Are you going to tell me?" You asked your voice shaking from the tears.

It clearly broke John to see you like this, and you knew you weren't afraid of him, you weren't angry at him. You just needed the truth.

"I'm the head of the mafia (y/n). Those man learned about you… about… what I felt for you and… you became a target."

You finally understood the recent events as he spoke.

"I tried to keep you safe, you're everything to me… I'm sorry, I told you they wouldn't touch you." John sighed closing his eyes tiredly before opening them again.

You were trying to process everything, of course you had been suspicious of something like this. You were surprised to felt fine towards the revelation. Actually at the moment you only felt relieved that John stood there alive.

"They didn't touch me John." Your voice sounded a bit calmer as you tried to speak.

He looked up at you, a bit of hope in his eyes.

"How do you feel about me then John?" You whispered looking at him.

His eyes stared into yours as his deep voice let you hear the only words you needed to hear.

"I love you."

You threw yourself at him, kissing him deeply. The taste of his tongue making you melt, his strong arms around you making you feel safe. You only pulled away to whisper the only words he needed to hear.

"I love you too. Don't you dare let me go John."

John groaned as he spoke again, his dark eyes staring into your (e/c) colored ones.

"No fuckin way. You're mine nobody's laying a finger on you baby girl."

You let yourself go entirely, you felt safe. Your thoughts wandered back to the Bridegroom's oak tree and you smiled. It must have been magic.

____

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