#today was Great btw it was lovely <- lie

[drill-teeth]

I was like this close to bursting into tears and calling an ambulance today I could hardly get up or swallow my medicine and I can't sleep now because it still hurts every time I so much as twitch. And I appreciate my doctors because at least they're listening to me and testing me for stuff. But I only have so much time and money right now for appointments between working my ass off and some bitch wrecking my fucking car, so if they don't diagnose me soon, I'm gonna freak the fuck out. AND ACTUALLY if a single person whines to me right now that it's so hard to do things with adhd or autism or whatever I'm going to lose my fucking marbles. Because I empathize and struggle with my mental illness too. But at least they have the option to fucking play games or draw or do chores or SLEEP. Instead of lying in bed twitching and crying because they can feel a brutal stabbing pain in their neck and shoulders with no one around to help and no money to afford the ambulance to the hospital while also experiencing a nightmare of self doubt thinking "am I really that disabled" while trying really hard not to just scream in agony.

[robertsbarbie]

i do really wanna study the phenomenon of people going to multiple shows of an artist and getting multiple meet and greets with an artist and feeling very entitled to said artist to the point they genuinely believe they’re friends with the artist and i know it goes along with parasocial relationships but like oh my god

[crescentmp3]

hiii im home! ^-^

[natalchartnurtures]

PAC: Mitski, what about me is eternal like the.. moon?

I had so much fun doing this

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 1:

'Cause my love is mine, all mine I love mine, mine, mine Nothing in the world belongs to me But my love is mine, all mine, all mine

I'm sitting right in front of your cards in utter awe. I got goosebumps when I laid eyes on your cards, pile 1. Let me begin by saying this: you've seen some DARK and truly terrible times, haven't ya? Even as I say this, it feels like an understatement. There have been times when you were stripped down to bare bones, and you had to "grow back the rest of you." I apologize for the gruesome metaphor (but hey, I'm just the messenger; this ain't really coming from me :p). Maybe you've had to encounter times when you felt painfully lonely, stuck in your head and in your general life too, like your spirit was beaten down. Or maybe it felt as if the universe snatched away something you thought was incredibly precious? But I hear that it wasn't what you thought it was; that's why it had to go. You probably didn't see it that way at all, and THAT'S ALRIGHT because we don't have Spirit's perspective, now do we? I see that you really struggled to put yourself together after that somewhat 'impossible-seeming' loss. It seemed like it came outta left field.

BUT GUESS THE FUCK WHAT. You, my friend, took this PAIN and these fucked up times and turned it into a damn palace of gold. You read that right. What's eternal about you? Your alchemy. Your fire. Your willpower. Your ability to take life by the balls. Your refusal to let it beat you to dust. Your refusal to be small. Literal goosebumps, you feeling it yet? It's your connection to God/Source/Universe. Your faith. Your mastery of your mind, babe. Yeah. You've somehow mastered your mind in this process of putting yourself back together. Acknowledge that ish! 'Cause you really did do that.

Nothing can ever get you to stop dreaming, and much less trying to stop you from achieving them, love. You're a powerhouse of energy, and God bless anybody who ever underestimates that (you included side-eyeing you right now). Not you getting low key called out, haha.

Don't get me wrong, though; being a powerhouse of energy doesn't necessarily mean being in everybody's face trying to assert your dominance, y'know? It can look like silent crying in the middle of the night and waking up the next day determined to overcome the thing that made you cry the day before.

Your light is what's eternal about you. It never goes off. Like ever. Your dedication to learning and growing through whatever, and I mean WHATEVER, life throws your way is what will never die, sweetie. It's like a part of your essence at this point. I hope you're proud of that and know that it's what will bring you to your success in life, whatever that looks like for each one of you beautiful ass people reading this :)

Haha, that's so cute; I just heard Spirit go "you're going places, sweetheart" ><

And with that, let's end your FABULOUS, goosebumps-inducing (btw, I don't say that about just ANYTHING), and awe-inspiring reading here.

Thank you, pile 1, for sharing your energy with me today. I love you guys so, so much and… not gonna lie, I'm low key honored to have been in your presence today. Haha, see ya!

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 2:

My baby, here on earth Showed me what my heart was worth So, when it comes to be my turn Could you shine it down here for her?

My god, why is there so much happening as I tap into your energy, pile 2? And I mean it in a nice way, though. I heard T Swift's song "The Last Great American Dynasty" as I was shuffling for you, and I heard Spirit go, "she's sweet and salty," lol. We'll see how all that plays into the reading eventually.

The first thing I noticed was your incredible balance within your mind and heart. It's shocking. Maybe you've been working on getting these aspects of yours to agree with one another and balance each other out, or it's simply your personality, but… pile 2, this beautiful mind-heart balance is what's eternal about you, love. Your peace. Your calm. The childlike innocence of your heart blending seamlessly with your mind's unending curiosity for life. Your emotional intelligence. The way you flow… like water, I heard. Wow! I find that so amazing, ugh, like can we be friends, pile 2? T-T, 'cause I definitely need some of that in my life right now, not gonna lie, haha.

There's that AND then there's a whole other dimension to you where you give 'life of the party' vibes as well. OH, so maybe that's why I heard Spirit say "sweet and salty," like two very different things but produce a wonderful taste together. Complex. Addicting. You make people want to come back for more, pile 2. Mmmmmm! Love that!

You have this laid-back vibe to you as well that a lot of people in your life appreciate. I see that your ability to lighten anybody's day is what's eternal about you awwww. I heard "she's the sunshine of my life." UGH, this is too wholesome for my heart; please save me. You seem to really perk up people's day/week or just life in general. You give, like, Saggi vibes, bro. It doesn't matter if you have that in your chart, but it's just your soul. The eternal aspect of you feels bright, expansive, loving, and so vibrant in energy, my god. You've also got strong feminine energy too… you must be really good at attracting 'cause you're strong in your feminine energy AND you're chill and detached from it at the same time. Effortless manifester, master manifester are some words that come to mind as I describe this.

Your divinity is what's eternal about you. Your 'witchy vibes.' Your embodiment of your highest truth. Your commitment to maintaining this divine connection in your day-to-day. Bro, what's eternal about you is that you can turn any old mundane task/thing into something fun and magical and full of meaning and symbolism. You live life deep, and even though there aren't a whole lotta people who can join you there, you wouldn't have it any other way. It's your raw authenticity, babe. Circling back to "The Last Great American Dynasty" song, maybe you're like Rebekah that T Swift sings about, "the most shameless woman this town has ever seen." People tend to call raw, authentic women shameless, but you couldn't care less. You will forever do what you like 'cause you're a free-spirited divine mystic in the body of a teeny lil human. Love it.

That's all I have for you, pile 2. Thank you for spending time with me! I love you so much <3

~~~~~~~~~~~

Pile 3:

Moon, tell me if I could Send up my heart to you? So, when I die, which I must do Could it shine down here with you?

Ah, my divine activators. What's eternal about you? Your intensity. BS detection might as well be your middle name. Sherlock Holmes who? 'Cause you're the new detective in town, baby, sniffing out illusions, falsities, fake people, LIES, victim mentality. None of that runs free with you around, I'll tell you that. It's your capacity to hold divine truth, lovingly, which is INCREDIBLY hard, btw. You can't stand half-assed people and people who seem to not have their "heads screwed on straight." Lmao, what kinda people are you surrounded by, pile 3? Ooh, I heard that you're divinely planted where you are so you can activate a lot of people into awakening to their true selves, but it looks like nobody wants to actually awaken. Lmao.

-Side note: My heart goes out to you if you've been surrounded by really difficult and chaotic energies that bring you down a lot. That SUCKS so hard, bro. Been there myself too lately, and it's not a fun merry-go-round to co-exist with. Just keep being your amazing cool-ass self, ok? Things will work out eventually. You already intuitively feel that things will get better, so trust that feeling!-

If I could describe your energy, I would use the Phoenix rising from the ashes symbolism to do so. Ohhhhh, as I told you that, I saw a vision of T Swift's music video of "Look What You Made Me Do," where she comes out of the grave and sings, "Honey, I rose up from the dead, I do it all the time." I'm a fan, pile 3. Omg. That's some badass ballsy energy, and I'm so here for it right now. You're the epitome of what psychological death and rebirth looks like. You're the textbook definition. And THAT'S what's eternal about you. No matter where you are or what you end up doing in life, you'll always be able to "rise up from the dead" and do it iconically too. Haha, I literally heard that. Lmao. This ability of yours is an extension of the greater aspect of you - your higher self. Whoa… I just heard you've had this ability for lifetimes and you will take it strongly with you to the next ones as well. Powerful. It's etched in your soul, pile 3. You know what you want and how to get it, even if not immediately; you always do eventually. It's the security you possess within yourself that's eternal, love. Nothing can really shake you at this point. Lmao. You've got a strong-ass foundation.

-Side note: I'm really seeing a healed and fully realized root chakra for you. If you haven't gotten there yet, you're well on your way! Good job! Root chakra work is the most brutal, btw, so… you really have my respect. Haha, moving on-

You have warrior energy present quietly in your personality as well. You give spiritual warrior vibes. You don't prefer to live in it 24/7; it's simply something you tap into when a situation calls for it. Otherwise, I see you being quite heart-centered, full of love, looking at the world with rose-colored glasses. Your inner child is what's eternal about you. Your divine sensitivity and your capacity to hold your emotions without judgment and live big from a place of heart. You embody the energy of water in my eyes, tbh. Life-giving but also destructive if need be, and there's absolutely nothing weak about water. Phew. You are eternal as the oceans are.

Ahhh, pile 3, that was sooo much fun! Thanks for stopping by, and I love you soooo much!

~~~~~~~~~~~

[theotherbuckley]

Im in love with this fic and i need more

🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵🦵

You're an amazing writer btw 🩷🪱

Thank you! I'm glad people are liking this fic 🥰

Here's 900 more words just for you <3

🦵 - Buck and Tommy meet at physio after the truck bombing

Tommy isn’t there at his next physio appointment — now only seeing his physiotherapist once every two weeks, unlike Buck who still has to see her every week. The session feels slower than normal; it always does when he’s alone. Bobby promised him that next time he would be able to come with, but today, there’s no one, not even Tommy, to chat with afterwards. 

Dr Mistry seems to sense his subdued mood and has taken to being far more cheerful than he can ever recall.

“Why are you so happy?” he asks, slumping down into his chair after she had given his leg a deep and rather unpleasant massage. 

Dr Mistry turns to him, shooting him a look which he doesn’t care to decipher. “You are quiet. It’s unsettling.”

Buck opens his mouth, closes it, and opens it again, staring at his doctor. “Hey, I don’t talk that much.”

“You haven’t even complained one time.”

And okay, that’s fair, but still. 

“I’m just tired,” Buck tells her. It’s not even a lie. He is tired. He’s always tired. He’s just a little spacey today. He’s been feeling quite defeated lately. Sometimes, it feels like all of his hard work is for nothing. His leg still aches like bitch whenever the weather changes, and he only just managed to complete the full length of the bar unaided last session, far behind where he should have been at this point. He’s trying so hard to get better, to work again, but it doesn’t matter how much effort he puts in, it’s never enough. He’s never enough. 

And when there’s nobody with him to tell his brain to shut up, he gets stuck inside his head, and he doesn’t quite know how to get out of it. 

It’s exhausting. 

So he’s tired. He really, really is. 

It’s just a type of tiredness that he doesn’t think he can recover from. Not until his leg is recovered, at least. 

Dr Mistry looks at him for a moment, her eyes scanning over his face, hyperanalysing his expressions as though she can see right down into his soul, see all of those helpless thoughts running around in his head. “There’s doctors for that,” she says, and Buck doesn’t have to ask what she means. 

“I don’t need therapy,” Buck says back, a little too defensively. He’s probably lying, but he doesn’t want to see anyone. He’s fine. He will be. It just takes time, isn’t that what everyone keeps saying?

“It’s not healthy to keep everything stuck inside. Sometimes it is good to let it all out,” she continues, ignoring his slight outburst. 

“I have people. It’s just— It’s hard when they’re not around.”

She nods in understanding but hands him a card anyway. “Just think about it.”

He takes the card begrudgingly and sticks it in his wallet, where he knows he’s not going to touch it again. He doesn’t need help. He just needs to be able to walk— to work. He’ll be fine after that. 

As soon as he gets home, he takes the card out of his wallet and stares at it. 

And then he texts Tommy. 

Buck: Have you ever seen a therapist?

Tommy: Hi Tommy how are you

I’m great thank you for asking

Buck: Yeah yeah

Answer the question

Tommy: I have

Buck: And? 

My doctor wants me to see one

But I don’t want to

Especially not after last time

I’m not that guy anymore

Tommy: Not what guy?

Buck: Not the guy who sleeps with his therapist

Tommy: I’m not sure if I should ask

Buck: Probably best

So..?

Tommy: Therapy helped me

I wasn’t a great guy before

Buck almost scoffs at his phone. Tommy the guy who drove him home and helped him up multiple flights of stairs, whilst injured, on their first meeting, wasn’t a good guy?

Buck: You? Be honest

Tommy: I wasn’t

Turns out repressing my sexuality and listening to what my father taught me is not a good combination

Hurt a lot of people because of it

But therapy helped

I’m comfortable being myself now

Buck has to pause at that. It’s not like there’s anything wrong with it, he just didn’t really expect it. Maybe that’s not a good thing to say. He’s an ally, actually. The rainbow flag in his bio every June proves that. 

Buck: Wait

You’re gay?

Tommy: I am, yeah. Is that a problem?

Buck: No of course not! Men are hot.

Tommy: Mmhmm  

Buck: So you think I should do it?

Tommy: Do what?

Buck: See a therapist

Tommy: I don’t know, Evan

That’s up to you

But if your doctor suggested it, maybe you should listen

Buck: And I don’t need to sleep with them?

Tommy: You definitely do not.

Even after the conversation, Buck can’t bring himself to dial the number on the card. His stomach rumbles after a while, and Buck looks at his watch, mildly surprised to find it past 3 pm. He drops the card on the coffee table, and hobbles to the kitchen with his cane to make himself some food. 

When he sits back down, his mind is focused on queer history, and he finds himself googling pride and forgetting all about therapy. It wasn’t like he needed it anyway.

[pabloqavi]

mastermind

summary. you are a famous singer who knows what they want so when in an interview you are asked about your celebrity crush you are quick to announce to the world that there's only one man in your heart, he just doesn't know you exist ! genre. fluff ! pairing. gavi x singer!reader !

voguespain & yourusername

head over to our youtube channel to watch yourusername telling us her beauty secrets and answering some questions

yourusername thank you for having me 🤍

iheartyn SHE LOOKS SO PRETTY OH MY GOD

30gavi6 no way her crush is gavi

pedrigavi68 SHE SUPPORTS BARÇA !!??

pedri 👀 pablogavi

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

"hello lovelies, i'm yn and today i'm gonna be telling you my beauty secrets while answering some questions" you smile to the camera while getting all your makeup out.

"okay first question, what's my favourite city i've visited? oh that's easy i love new york but barcelona is where i grew up so can't compete with that" you say as you start applying your moisturiser.

"my first secret is i hydrate my face everyday in the morning and night, no matter if i wear makeup or not, you have to take care of your skin" you smile at the camera.

"next question" you start applying your concealer "what's the inspiration behind your last album? oh my god that's a good one. usually i write songs about things that happen to me but most of the time my songs are about fake scenarios i think about before falling asleep" you laugh

"okay guys this is my best kept makeup secret, before applying your setting powder slightly massage it on your hand so you don't apply it on excess" you tell the camera while doing it.

...

"okay now that my makeup is ready we are gonna answer just one more question" you smile "who's your celebrity crush? oh god this is so embarrassing, okay so i'm a big culer ever since i was little and there's this new player that i can't lie has been on my mind for quite a time now" you feel your cheeks heat up "he is of course pablo gavi" you say quickly before saying your goodbyes and finishing the video.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

pablo's pov

training was finally over and all of us were quickly heading to the showers so we could get home soon.

"ey gavi have you seen this" pedri passes me his phone as i get back to the locker room drying my hair with a towel.

"seen what?" you hear someone ask in the background.

"who's your celebrity crush? oh god this is so embarrassing, okay so i'm a big culer ever since i was little and there's this new player that i can't lie has been on my mind for quite a time now. he is of course pablo gavi" you see a brunette girl saying to a camera.

"has the baby got a girlfriend?" you distantly hear ferran yelling before feeling all of the guys joining him.

"dont be stupid, text her" pedri tells you before clapping your back and taking back his phone. soon enough you have your phone out and have already followed her back.

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

pablogavi followed you back

[pablogavi]: hey!

[yourusername]: hi so you've seen the interview haven't you?

[pablogavi]: yeah 😊 my friend pedri showed me the clip😂

[pablogavi]: just wanted to say that you're like really pretty and maybe you wanted to go out or something

[pablogavi]: not as a date

[pablogavi]: well unless you wanted to go out as a date

[pablogavi]: is okay if you don't want to or can't btw

[yourusername]: of course i want to go out

[yourusername]: it's a date then😉

[pablogavi]: great 🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

yourusername

barcelona has never been this pretty🤍

pablogavi 🥰🥰❤️❤️

pedri where's my thank you for being the matchmaker????

pablogavi shut up

iheartyn BARCELONA SHOW SOON !??

yourusername 🤐🤐🤐

iheartyn OH MT FOS YOU RWPLIED I LOVE YOU

30gavi6 IS THAT GAVI OMG

[the-girl-wh0-cries-w0lf]

Tiny humans - Dr James Wilson x peds!reader

description: House gets to meet Wilson's new girlfriend for the first time when his case takes him into his worst nightmare...peds. House is in for a shock at the ball of sunshine who has his best friend on a string.

authors note: my first post for this series I want to do of oneshots and my first fanfic post on tumblr ever...enjoy!!! Btw i'm taking a lot of inspo from Arizona Robbins from Greys anatomy

Masterlist

REQUESTS OPEN FOR PEDS!READER - request here

House limped down the hallway followed by an exasperated Wilson who was concerned at his friends eager step, seeing as he was on his way to see a patient. How un-house-like.

"This is peds remember, these aren't normal patients. They don't lie, they don't have ulterior motives, they're just...kids." Wilson halted his friends shoulder and turned him towards his concerned face.

"So, wait until they've had a sip of beer before berating their existence?" House mockingly tilted his head in faux concern. Wilson's mouth opened but all that left was a sigh.

After confirming that his friend was no longer going to halt the inevitable, he continued on with a new fervour in his limp. But Wilson didn't stop there and sped to catch up with the surprising amount of ground his friend had covered.

"You see she loves these kids almost...almost like they're her own. She's smart and is excellent at what she does but she doesn't care about that." Wilson paused and looked back into his mind, picturing the moment he first saw her in a child's room, a plastic tiara on her head and an empty teacup perfectly clasped between her fingers.

"She cares about the kids."

"Wow. I'm touched." House grasps his chest and wipes away a non-existant tear. "Do you know how easy being a paediatrician is. They can't lie until they grow teeth and after that they're stupid enough to reveal to us when their parents lie. There's a reason it's 'daddy touches my special place' and not 'daddy gets aroused by children.'"

"That's it I'm making the rule. No pedaphile jokes."

"But the jokes literally in the name...peds"

"Who lets you around children?"

"Who lets me around people? Haha, I got you there!" He jabs a finger into Wilson's chest. Wilson rolls his eyes and holds out his arm to prevent his morose friend entering the land of happiness. Well as happy as a bunch of sick kids can be.

"Well let me appeal to your true nature." Wilson sighs. "I like this girl and she likes me. Please don't ruin it?"

"How could I say no to those puppy dog eyes. Fine! But only in the name of your libido, at least until I finish my soul-searching and realise my true calling is your bed."

Whilst House finishes his thought, they are spotted by a woman in pink scrubs, absent of any colour of coat. She briskly walks towards the two.

"Dr Wilson, Dr House. My name is..."

"I don't remember nurses names, it's nothing personal, I rarely remember anyones."

Wilson coughs and shoves his friends shoulder to direct him towards your burning gaze.

"As I was saying, my name is DOCTOR y/l/n. Pleasure to meet you."

Despite the gaze, her smile remains cheerful and she extends her hand for House to shake. Reluctantly, he eventually offers it and it is taken in a firm and bouncy handshake.

"James has told me so much about you, to be honest I'm surprised our paths have not crossed sooner. Regardless, today I am so happy to welcome you both to peds. The most magical place on earth."

Whilst listening to her, House took stock of the woman in front of him. Her pink scrubs seemed to be the dullest thing about her. Her hair was collected in a ponytail that swished its way down between her shoulder blades. Her pockets were lined with memories of her past. A pink glitter pen given to her from a girl who was continually brought in for asthma, a ball of yarn from a boy who had loved knitting, a yellow sticker saying great job, a blue glitter one saying 'you go girl'. There was a pencil with a yellow smiley face rubber and another that seemed to contain many colours. I guess that just made it all the more fun. House smirked when he saw a pocket protector. Not too dissimilar to the one that lined the pocket of the smitten brunette next to him.

"Gentlemen, this is peds. This is the place of the tiny humans. They like glitter, they play games, they see us as magicians. They believe we are the magical healers who can cure them. So that's how we present ourselves to them. The tiny humans may be tiny but they are strong. Stronger than most. Their bodies fight because they know they have so much life left to live and we try our hardest to give them as much life left as we possibly can."

As the girl speaks, absolutely in awe of her job and the lives it saves. She fails to notice the adoring gaze of the one she calls hers. The brunette looks to her as if she hung the stars and the moon and even though he could hear House's eyes rolling into the back of his skull, he couldn't bring himself to look or care. Not when she was in his line of sight.

"So you will not be stubborn, you will not be blunt or sarcastic. As far as I'm concerned, today you are the two newest editions to the circus. So play the part and follow my lead."

She picks up her files which were each coordinated by colour and glitter. House smirked at this. She turns to push open the door to the unit but falters.

"Also..."

She turns back to face the two men.

"The owners of the tiny humans can be quite volatile. You've been warned. Enjoy!" Her look of warning is quickly replaced by a mask of pure joy.

House softly giggles.

"I like her. Will we soon be hearing the pitter patter of tiny 'Wilson' humans?"

Wilson didn’t even hear his friends comment and instead chose to follow his beauty, like a moth to a flame.

House shrugs.

"Men, never thinking with the right head." As he eyes the glitter residue that adorns Wilson’s sleeve.

[iateyourparents]

i want to write you a song | c.b.

pairing: colby brock x musician!fem!reader

summary: you were an artist. when you were heartbroken you didn’t just cry alone in bed. you’re just making something out of your emotions.

warnings: kinda angsty, break up, use of y/n, bad writing and grammar(i’m sorry, english isn’t my first language)

an: inspired by ‘I want to write you a song’ by One Direction. (btw guys i’m slowly running out of ideas so if you have something you would like to read you can request it/write to me or in comments <3)

pictures are from pinterest:)

You wanted to lie in bed all day. You really wanted to. But you weren’t this type of person, you couldn’t just lie all day while not doing anything but crying. It would just make you more frustrated.

So instead you just decided to pour your emotions on a paper and write a song.

You really wanted to make some energetic song where you would just badmouth your ex but you still loved him too much to do that, so instead you wrote a goodbye song for him. And it was really good.

“I want to write you a song, one as beautiful as you are sweet” you hummed to yourself trying to make a melody that would be perfect with your song.

“Already sounds great sweetie.” your manager, Ellie, said coming into your studio room. You deeply regreted giving her keys to your apartment. “What got you writing something like that? It doesn’t sound like love songs you made about Colby.”

“It’s a goodbye song for Colby. I actually wanted to call him an asshole and viagra taker but I just couldn’t make myself do that so I decided to do this. And I actually feel pretty good after writing this.” you shrugged and put your gituar in its place.

“Oh honey, what happend?” she sounded concerned.

“Colby broke up with me because he ‘didn’t felt as he should feel’ he just…wasn’t in love anymore.” you felt tears pricking at your eyes. Ellie gasped and hugged you tightly. “Don’t feel too bad, that song is amazing.” you laughed even though tears were already streaming from your eyes.

|||

“Okay guys, so I have this new song and you’ll be the first ones to ever hear it before it comes out today at midnight.” you told the crowd which started screaming with excitement. “That’s actually a form of a goodbye to someone who was, still is, important to me and even if we won’t ever talk again I want him to know I wish him the best.”

Well, maybe that wasn’t the best way to announce your break up to the world but whatever. It’s not like twitter and tik tok detectives weren’t starting to notice little things.

Music started playing right when you started playing your gituar and crowd got silent to listen better to new song.

“I want to write you a song, one as beautiful as you are sweet…” you continued singing and people started to get what you meant, and who you meant, in your little speech and well, you never heard a silence quite this loud.

“I want to write you a song. One to make your heart remember me, so anytime I’m gone you can listen to my voice and sing along. I want to write you a song.” you ended the song with tears in your eyes. Singing it out loud in front of thousands of people made you realize how real that situation was. You were no longer with Colby. And it still hurts.

You could see that some people in the crowd had shock on their faces and tears in their eyes. It was the first time ever it was so silent after you ended a song. And it felt weird but also so right.

It was like a minute of silence for you and Colby and for your relationship. For your memories.

You and Colby were popular couple. Many people said you’re the perfect example of right person in right time, so you knew these news would be heartbreaking for some of your fans.

“I know it’s probably a lot to take in just a moment but it actually felt good singing this out loud. Yeah, some chapters in life ends but that doesn’t mean there’s nothing waiting for us. New chapter is just a new chance and I’m gonna use it as best as I can.” you did a little speech and your fans finally recovered from the news you dropped at them and applaused for you. “I love you guys, I wouldn’t be here without you. I’m so fucking grateful for y‘all. See you soon!” as you were coming off the stage you could hear squeaks, shouting and clapping and it made you smile. You made it. And you will make it through this negative feelings. And you will be fine again.

|||

You were in a bar. It was your friend’s birthday party and as much as you liked her, this party sucked. Everybody was so sober and awkward that it made you want to leave.

“Oh hi.” you heard next to you. When you turned you saw Colby.

“Hi” you smiled to him. He looked really good. His black button up was revealing part of his chest and his beautiful blue eyes were shining in dim light “How are you?”

You tried to be civil with him. You were almost used to thought that you are no longer together. It still hurt, especially with world still talking about it since you announced it just few days ago even though you were broken up for few months.

“Good, thanks. And you?”

“Fine.” you smiled awkwardly. You stood in kind of awkward silence and just from looking at him you knew he wanted to tell you something but wasn’t sure how. “Just say it.”

“I like the song you wrote.” he finally choked out and you felt your heart squeezing. You didn’t expect him to start this topic but you just gulped and faked a giggle.

“Thank you.” when you wanted to say something else he stopped you with his words.

“I know I hurt you. I regret it like nothing else in my life but you deserve better. I just didn’t feel like I loved you enough. Not as much as you deserve to be loved. So I didn’t want to hurt you even more with pretending. But maybe…” he quickly shuted up and then changed his words, or rather tried to avoid saying what he started saying. “So I thought that would be better. But I still love you and think that in some way, I always will. But I think it’s better if you find your perfect match instead of being stuck with me. And it might seem cruel for me to say this now but I just wanted you to know that it would be impossible for me to forget someone like you. You changed my life, y/n.”

You wanted to say something but before you realized it he was out of your eyesight so you just sighed and took a sip of vodka.

|||

It’s been a month and you couldn’t stop thinking about Colby’s words.

Did he meant what you thought he meant?

He still loved you but didn’t think it was enough? Didn’t think he was enough for you?

You had so many questions and it made you sleepless trying to think what you should do or what are answers to these questions.

So now here you were, at Colby’s door in the middle of the night, still in your pajamas, hoping he was home.

You inhaled an air into your lungs and started knocking. Maybe more aggressive than you should but you just were desperate for answers and you couldn’t give up.

Finally moments later, the doors opened revealing sleepy Colby who looked at you confused and then he suddenly were more awake looking at you with concern.

“Everything okay? What happened? Are you hurt or in danger?” he looked over you as if to look for any visible wounds.

“Yes, I mean no.” you sighed and started explaining. “Since Doris’ birthday I can’t stop thinking about your words and it’s fucking crazy. Like, what did you mean?”

Colby could see desperation and tiredness in your eyes and it make him feel bad because he was the reason of your distress.

“I…”

You interrupted him.

“I thought about it so much that i got to a conclusion that you still love me but don’t want to be with me because you’re too… scared of something, like hurting me or whatever. And it hurts so much anyway because I don’t think I can function without you anymore what is so funny to me because I literally wrote a song to get over you. But it didn’t work because I still fucking love you and want you back and I hope i’m right and you also still love me because I think it will break me for good if I’m wrong and you don’t love me anymore. And I might sound so pathetic right now but I don’t care becau…”

This time he was the one who interrupted you. But with the way he did that, you couldn’t be mad.

He kissed you to make you shut up.

You gladly reciprocated the kiss and after a moment he took his lips away just to place his forehead on yours.

“You’re right. I’m still in love with you. But I just felt like my love wasn’t enough, that you deserve so much better. Someone who will always be able to show you his love and share your passions with you and…” now you were the one shutting him up with your lips.

“Don’t say anything. You’re so stupid, Colbs. You’re the only one I want, even if you have your own hobbies. And you showed me your love in a way I loved. I want you, only you.”

Colby smiled at you and took your hands to lead you inside his home.

“I’m so glad you were brave enough to come here because I missed you so much but was afraid to confront you after Doris’ party.” you laughed softly at that and squeezed his hand.

Maybe now you will be back to writing love songs about this man.

[schrodinger-swriter]

hello, mx. atlas!! i hope you're having a good day/night :D i'd like to request 8 (mutual pining), 11 (domestic) & 12 (soulmate AU) for alastor if that's okay? i love and appreciate your writing/ideas so much btw, keep on doing what you do!

Prompts 8 11 and 12 with Alastor

I apologize if this is a little short, Anon! It's rather cold in my house currently. As well as this, my keyboard to my laptap is deciding to be rather... mean today. It keeps opening windows every now and then when I go to type, readjusting it seems to help (it's one of those bluetooth keyboard..) but boy.. is this an awkward typing angle!

Regardless, I hope you enjoy Anon! C:

MUTUAL PINING:

I've actually written this before in a post! You can find it here!

DOMESTIC:

He's rather neat when it comes to the house, everything is organized and he has a system of sorting everything out! He's great at keeping on top of the dishes, although he won't lie when he's asked if he uses his powers to help out with some of the more undesirable chores (he does!)

He's also, all things considered, a fairly good room mate! Once you get past some of his more sadistic tendencies and eating habits, he's polite and respectful of your space. You both cook dinner together at least once a week, alternating who picks the meal. There's bound to be some music playing during those nights to fill the quiet when there's a pause in your conversation.

SOULMATE AU:

Shared pain if your means of connecting with your soulmate in this AU. It's a rather unconventional one and it mostly leaves Alastor feeling a little sore thanks to your clumsiness.. oh he doesn't fully mean that..!

But imagine, you feel his pain when he's beat down by Adam in the finale. Usually these prompts tend to be fluffier, but imagine.. there's this sickening dread that hangs in you that there's something deeply wrong. You're body is aching, not from your own pain from the fight. No, this pain is new and sudden. Your relief is immeasurable when Alastor finally returns after the botched extermination.

[maverick-werewolf]

Daily Werewolf Thoughts - Days 10-16

More not super prettily formatting werewolf thought posts that I've been doing daily!

Day 10- You don't really love werewolves if you don't enjoy terrible werewolf movies. Which the vast and overwhelming majority of them are terrible, at least if you ask me. But I just love werewolves so much I am driven to watch them (I also love movies with all my heart and soul), and even if the film is beyond terrible - again, as most of them are, even the ones people say are good - there's going to be a few moments that make it worth it, because werewolves are so badass, and I absolutely love studying how they created the werewolf for any film. Here's a bit of a rant for today...

One such film and series is Underworld. I hate the Underworld movies. Yes, stone me. They're terrible. The only one I enjoyed in its own right at all was Rise of the Lycans, since it had a far more compelling story than Selene's tight black leather (I understand why men enjoy this, in their defense) and absurd motivations that only extend as far as what the director wants for the next action sequence - and it was set in the Middle Ages, which is way better as a werewolf story, imo. Anyway, regardless of how I feel about the movies, I LOVE how they handled the practical effects on the werewolves.

The Underworld werewolves are unmatched. I'm not crazy about the design of the main "lie-kans" - I will never forgive the movie for the "lycans" thing btw - because they were specifically designed to be more "cat-like" or even more like a pitbull. For some reason people like to use things like cats, bears, etc to design something called a "werewolf." So I think those initial ones, like in the first film, frankly look pretty stupid. But the "feral" lycan "breed" or whatever they're called that have the more wolfish heads are a very cool design, and ultimately what I'm talking about here is how they were created and put to film. Sidebar: I'm not one of those people who thinks that the instant a movie uses any CGI, it should be condemned; CGI is a tool like any other filmmaking tool, and it can be used to achieve things we otherwise could never film and that are artistically beautiful and creative; but yes, I do prefer practical effects where they can be used.

The werewolves in Underworld were created using bodysuits, animatronics, and creature actors. They wore leg extensions, got big guys in the first place, and had extensive work for muscle, hair, and especially the faces and facial animations. The entire face is created using servos that respond to controllers held by workers off-camera to animate the werewolf costume in real time, while it's being worn by a person. The entire face, eyes, mouth, lips, etc were fully animated using a complex system of animatronics, and a comm system so the actor can be given instructions from the lead puppeteer so everyone can properly sync their work - and the final effect is such a step beyond anything we've seen from werewolf designs of this size in film before - or since.

There are better videos of the later films that had more advanced technology, like Underworld: Evolution (terrible movie but great werewolf effects), but here's one on youtube that has a lot of what was involved: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3jWIF8lSlxg&ab_channel=IsaacKoo

*: "feral" by definition most often specifically refers to domesticated animals that have gone wild again and sounds very odd when used to refer to something like a wolf (but it always happens anyway because people don't care about the English language; ask any video game about their "feral wolves")

**: "breed" specifically refers to controlling the birthing of animals to produce a desired outcome, as in domesticated animals, such as dogs, cats, sheep, etc., and it makes me want to become a hermit living alone atop the Himalayas when I see people use it for werewolves

Day 11- I've often wondered what exactly set me down this path of being completely and hopelessly obsessed with werewolves. I've never really had an answer. I've speculated it was just Halloween itself, seeing the very rare and occasional werewolf around, since that's always been my favorite "kind" of werewolf. I have distinct memories of a little werewolf statue in a Hallmark; I really loved looking at that thing (never got it, though, sadly). I've occasionally wondered if it was watching Scooby Doo at my grandma's house - but in retrospect, the werewolves in Scooby Doo of that era weren't much to write home about, so that probably wasn't it. I do know for a fact I've been obsessed with them for as long as I can remember, certainly by age 6, so whatever it was, it started early. I was reading Sabine Baring-Gould's The Book of Werewolves when I was 8, searching for werewolves in video games forever, and I'll never forget the first werewolf figure I got to decorate my desk.

If you ask one of my favorite professors, who sat on the committee that passed ultimate judgment upon what became my book The Werewolf: Past and Future, she would tell you I was led to love werewolves because of "dream visions" (she is a professor and lifelong student of Old Norse, Old English, and the cultures, many sagas, and histories thereof). I told her about how my earliest memories of werewolves and the start of my obsession with them were actually long series of dreams and nightmares I had - a white werewolf would always crop up in them, sooner or later. Sometimes he was on my side, sometimes not. My dreams and nightmares are... very detached from reality in the first place, but the white werewolf became consistent for a long time. What put the idea of a werewolf into my head in the first place? I'm really not sure.

Some of my favorite experiences with werewolves come from playing as them in classic RPGs, including ones where you aren't technically supposed to be one. I loved playing a werewolf in Neverwinter Nights using character editors, cheat codes, and scripts on the big roleplaying server I played on. Now THAT was fun, but that's a whole separate story.

Anyway, I really don't even know. All I know is, I've loved werewolves for as long as I can remember, and I always will, no matter how silly that might seem.

Day 12- Remember when video games called RPGs had actual roleplaying elements in them? Some of the only games that have ever let you play as a proper werewolf are the Elder Scrolls series, specifically Daggerfall and Morrowind: Bloodmoon, the latter being my absolute favorite werewolf game ever. Why? Because you actually played as a werewolf - and all that came with it - instead of lycanthropy being a cool thing and/or awesome button.

In Bloodmoon, if you are a werewolf (having either become one from surviving a werewolf attack - werewolves spawn with INSANE rarity, trust me I found one naturally and it took me weeks, in the wild of Solstheim or you can become one through the main Bloodmoon questline), you will transform each night. You must devour 1 humanoid (playable race) NPC or suffer from hunger and exhaustion the following day, lowering your stats. The transformation will break any armor you have equipped. If someone witnesses the transformation, word of your true nature will spread, and you will be hunted. You are also attacked on sight - but NPCs will often run away rather than dare attack you. Your stats are insanely boosted, you run like the wind and leap to the point of almost flying, and you can destroy nearly anything in your path. It is one of the single coolest things in all of gaming and nothing like it has ever been recreated (I have biases).

Being a werewolf became part of your character and changed your entire gameplay experience rather than just being an "ability" or "race."

Many of these systems were also in place in Daggerfall, Morrowind's predecessor. But Morrowind was the last game of the ES series to incorporate proper werewolf mechanics. In Oblivion, we got exactly nothing, which left me crushingly disappointed as a child. In Skyrim, you have an awesome button werewolf mode wherein you must continually devour enemies in order to maintain the werewolf form. It's cool and it's fun, and I'm very glad Skyrim had werewolves playable at launch, but it doesn't have anything approaching the same feel as "being" a werewolf in Bloodmoon, where it is a curse. It can be an inconvenience, it can be an advantage, and it's something you have to plan your gameplay around - and something you must hide from everyone around you. That is what playing as a werewolf should be. I'm likely to make another post soon talking about that some more, because it's a favorite subject.

Anyway, therefore, Morrowind's expansion pack Bloodmoon is easily one of my favorite games ever made. It is really the only game where you can really play as a werewolf instead of a reasonably cool and fun but ultimately far less interesting alternative.

I also recently wrote a big ol' article about the best video games that let you play as a werewolf: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/werewolf-articles/werewolf-article-play-as-a-werewolf-video-games/

Day 13- A werewolf's transformation sequence is one of the single most important things in any werewolf story. It might even be -the- most important. After all, the crux of werewolves is that even a man who is pure at heart (etc) can become a monster - and back again - and the sequence undergoing such a traumatic change is quite a thing to tackle.

I've seen it approached many ways. Painfully (obviously), painlessly, slow, fast, as something undesirable and as something desirable, as something controllable and uncontrollable - I swear this isn't innuendo. Anyway, personally, my favorite will always very easily be the most classic concept of the werewolf transformation: painful, traumatic, and very, very bad. I am not here for cuddly or happy werewolves. I'm also a fan of the werewolf not remembering what happened, but I'll ramble about that one later.

This also actually has basis in legend, as well. Even in antiquity, witnessing a werewolf transformation would potentially bring one to madness. This is mentioned in several stories, including but not necessarily limited to Niceros's story, in which witnessing the werewolf transformation freaks him out beyond reason. When he realizes the soldier he'd traveled with was a werewolf, he swears never to go near him again: "I couldn’t have eaten a crumb of bread with him, no, not if you had killed me!"

In Ovid's Metamorphoses, oft hailed as one of the "first werewolf legends" (that we have recorded, anyway), we also get our first proper werewolf transformation ever in the form of the legend of Lycaon...

"[Lycaon] howled his heart out, trying in vain to speak.

With rabid mouth he turned his lust for slaughter

Against the flocks, delighting still in blood.

His clothes changed to coarse hair, his arms to legs—

He was a wolf, yet kept some human trace,

the same grey hair, the same fierce face, the same

Wild eyes, the same image of savagery."

I've always found it interesting to note that his clothes became coarse hair, rather than him tearing his clothes off. Just a little difference there between this and many other legends.

Lots more on the ancient Greek tale of King Lycaon here: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-fact-66-the-legend-of-king-lycaon-of-arcadia/

There are a few legends, of course, that don't make it quite this dramatic. But popular culture carried over the painful transformation sequence for those with the werewolf curse, by and large, and it's incredibly effective. Everyone remembers seeing the first transformation in An American Werewolf in London (as much as I think the movie itself frankly just sucks), and likewise no one was exactly taken by a guy jumping really high and painlessly CGI'ing into a wolf in like .3 seconds.

I obviously have a lot of opinions on werewolf transformations, just like every other werewolf thing. The best and most memorable werewolf transformations are painful, dramatic, and traumatizing - because, after all, being a werewolf is neither a fun thing nor a good time... not for anyone involved.

Day 14- There's something I deeply hate in media, and it's when someone says "a werewolf scratch can turn you!" What on earth?

I have a lot of thoughts about all of this, obviously, and I'll get more into the whole werewolf bite thing later, but let's entertain if you will this notion that becoming a werewolf is like rabies. This is an extremely Early Modern concept, following the rise of scientific thought and the dismissal of all things mystical, religious, magical, mysterious, and allegorical, but even then, a werewolf spreading lycanthropy (in itself an Early Modern concept, as it was viewed as a disease, not a curse) via bite has no basis in folklore already. Does that make it bad? Nonsense, a werewolf bite is a classic storytelling element - that, once again, almost certainly comes from The Wolf Man (1941). It's so classic that for some reason zombies later completely lifted it and now everyone acts like it's a zombie thing, which is completely unfair.

But a werewolf scratch? Really? Even if we're equating it with rabies, that still doesn't work. And how stupid is it for someone to be like "oh no! the werewolf SCRATCHED you!" When I hear "scratch," I think "my cat got a little too excited about the tummy button," not "I've been mauled by a giant twisted man-beast and now I will inherit its curse." How does a werewolf even "scratch" someone without taking an entire limb off or raking red rivers through your torso? Are we sure it was a werewolf, or is it a chihuahua*?

I really wish this "werewolf scratch" thing would stop. It's just bad all over. Bring back werewolf bites exclusively.

*: what pains me is that some people would find this hilarious and make this their exclusive takeaway, because werewolves have just become jokes

Day 15- I love a wide variety of werewolf designs. If the werewolf is presented well, the design doesn't always matter that massively, as long as it doesn't look incredibly dumb and/or doesn't even resemble a man or a wolf. Unfortunately, it's amazing how often this happens.

Many monster design classes do actually say, when designing a werewolf, absolutely don't use a wolf as a reference. Artists are told by everyone under the sun, including filmmakers: use dogs, cats, bears, mandrills, hyenas - I've even seen mules, foxes, bats, badgers... and above all, they are told explicitly: whatever you do, don't use a wolf as inspiration. That'd be like, expected or cliche or bad or corny or something, because it's a WOLF monster. And we can't do anything "expected."

Werewolves are two things: human and wolf. If you're drawing the majority of your inspiration from a bear or a cat or a fox or hyena or whatever else, why even call it a werewolf? Why not make a different creature entirely, like the Beast of Gevaudan?

(more on that remark here: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/the-beast-of-gevaudan/ )

I can understand the desire of some to have some particularly "memorable" or "unique" design (although I have never been taken by any of these attempts, nor do I remember them fondly), but ultimately, it baffles me that someone would choose to draw more directly from animals that aren't wolves for a werewolf design. Then again, you can also go too far in the opposite direction and just end up with fluffy wolf-people, and those can look far too cuddly (at least to... modern audiences; no one thought the werewolves in Dog Soldiers were cute even just a few years ago).

It's a careful balance to walk. When I was very young and innocent, I hated that many designs removed the tail from a werewolf (which they have in legend and I think it looks cooler), but I completely understand now. I also understand wanting to change the head shape, ear shape, etc, but all of this can be achieved without making the werewolf look like some other animal or like nothing in particular. There's a reason the Underworld werewolf design that became ubiquitous for so many werewolves afterward - Skyrim, for example, and World of Warcraft: Cataclysm, just to name two - was the one with the wolfish muzzle and head shape, not the "cat pitbull" design from the first film.

Call me old-fashioned (I am), but I want a werewolf to look like what it's called. Note: I'm also not knocking the quadrupedal but still part-man looking designs, although those are far from my favorite, but it should still have wolf features. At least a few.

Day 16- Another werewolf folklore lesson! How about "curing" lycanthropy? What was that like in folklore - lifting the werewolf curse?

As per usual for my discussions, I have to mention that being a werewolf was not considered a "disease" until relatively recently; it was a magical curse, not an illness that could be "contracted" or "cured," and individuals were not "infected." Likewise, there weren't exactly a lot of examples of a werewolf curse - as per traditional "transforming between man and beast on a regular basis" definition of "werewolf" - being lifted in folklore.

There are some examples of more unusual variations of the curse being lifted, however, namely with those who end up stuck in a more seemingly permanent wolf form. Removing a magic item that cursed you to become a werewolf is fairly common, such as the magic skins donned by Sigmund and Sinfjotli in the Volsunga Saga; when they wore them, they were wolves, and only returned to human form when they managed to get the skins back off again. Another example is Melion (titular character of a British lai), who was trapped in the form of a wolf when he put on a cursed ring.

And in at least one story, that of Guillame de Palerne, the werewolf returns to his human shape when the one who cursed him is killed. This is a special case in that the werewolf never actually returned to a human form and was in fact stuck as a wolf, so it's not quite your typical werewolf example, but it is still from a French story whose title was translated as William and the Werewolf - and it's a good story.

However, in the vast majority of cases, especially with the werewolves that are more in line with what we think of as proper werewolves (transforming back and forth, instead of stuck in a wolf form), either the werewolf stayed a werewolf and it wasn't really that big of a deal (such as in several ancient Greek tales and some medieval tales, for example)...

Or else the werewolf was killed. Popular culture sometimes insists the only cure for lycanthropy is death, and that also often held true in many legends. It's also quite fun and dramatic, of course, although I do get tired of the werewolf predictably getting wasted.

There is, of course, a Werewolf Fact for this: https://maverickwerewolf.com/werewolf-facts/how-to-cure-lycanthropy/

[sheyfu]

》 even with all the sae in my mind, miyuki kazuya is still no. 1 in my heart 😭😭😭; another silly thought with miyuki kazuya from ace of the diamond; literally one of my comfort animes ahu ahu ahu 😓😓; fluff/comedy; you guys fight over the blanket (you love e/o dearly tho); (implied) mlb!kazuya (bro is your husband); no specified gender; wcc 555; read for a banger 🙏🙏

nights are never dull with miyuki kazuya. said nights include staying up well past midnight playing console games, gossiping about random couples you saw in his game a while ago, and something as simple as fighting over the blanket. 

well, this night is definitely one of those.

“stop moving i'm about to fall off the bed!” you complain.

“it's not my fault it's damn cold, who set the ac to 16 degrees anyways?!” miyuki quips.

him and his stupid brain. “you, stupid!” you say as you pull the blanket over to your side with all your strength.

it had been a very hot day which meant a very hot room in your shared apartment. while outside felt a bit cooler with the wind, the inside felt like hell. so here you both are snuggled up in your king size bed fighting over a stupid blanket because some stupid guy who plays baseball set the temperature to 16 degrees and left the ac remote on a very far table in the room. of course, neither of you plan to get out of the bed and walk those ten steps. amazing, right? yeah. definitely one of the worst nights with him 0/10, -1090200 aura points. never doing this again. 

you felt a jab on your chest. “hey! watch it, stupid” 

“it's not my fault you're hogging the blanket!” he complains.

you take deep breathes to calm yourself before threatening him with a white lie, “okay you know what just because of that im going to sleep in the bathroom.” 

then you heard it. he whines. miyuki kazuya whines and kicks his feet like a little toddler. “don't! it's cold and you're going to leave your poor and lonely husband here?! what a traitor!” he turns away from you and hugs the blanket closer to him.

great, he’s sulking now. and worse, he has the blanket. 

you sigh deeply, agitated with the way he's acting. yet, it's very endearing.

what a doofus. 

you close your eyes and try not to think about the discomfort of the skin-biting cold.

a few minutes pass and you faintly hear the sheets ruffling again—almost succumbing to the sweet embrace of slumber. however, your tranquility was interrupted by two strong arms and a heated blanket around your figure. 

you slightly open your eyes to see a pouting thing beside you.

“what's your problem now, kazuya?”

“go to sleep, stupid.”

“okay, whatever. thanks for sharing my blanket with me, handsome” yeah. your blanket definitely. 

right as you drift off to dreamland, you feel his lips on yours for a brief moment. 

“i love you” 

okay, maybe the night wasn't bad at all. +10000 aura points, 11/10 will do again.  

and thanks to that, miyuki kazuya woke up to his favourite sight on the bed-–a sticky note that says, hey, just went to pick up some groceries and supplies for my project. you're on cleaning duty today btw. also, mr. and mrs. fluff's litter boxes need changes. pls do them. it's to make up for hogging the blanket :)). love, your dearest 💛. definitely put a scowl on his face.

safe to say miyuki kazuya will never ever hog the blanket…

and forget about the ac remote. tsk. who even decided to put that stupid table in the corner? 

it was him.

HELLOOOOO tried something new with dialogue! i hope this was enjoyable for everyone!! even though ace of diamond has a small audience, i can't not write about miyuki kazuya, he's just too 😭😭😭. i'm still trying to find out my writing style so for now, similar pieces will be posted!! thanks for being here and hope to see you soon :)) reblogs, comments and likes are very much appreciated!! <3

[in-hav3n]

i have this idea of you reacting to james' mullet haircut for the first time, like you don't like it at first sight but after a few days you start to get into it <3 he was so hot in that era btw

𝐍𝐄𝐖 𝐒𝐓𝐘𝐋𝐄 

As you parked in front of the studio around 2pm, you were still wondering what was this important thing James needed to show you. You knew they were preparing a few new songs but you were sure he showed you all the riffs ideas they got. The only clue you had was a note he wrote this morning and left on the table.

"Meet me in the studio this afternoon, have something to show you".

Your first reaction was to smile at the note. You were used to these random quick messages, addressed to you for many reasons, like "Can you please buy bacon ? I'm hungry for it" or "Giant barbecue with the guys on Saturday night?". But this one was particularly mysterious…

More and more intrigued, you came into the studio's little kitchen a few minutes later, greetings the band and the studio's management, hoping that at least one of them could help you to discover what it was.

"Do you know why James asked us to all come here today?", Kirk handed you a coffee mug. You shook your head at his question, thanking him for the drink.

"Absolutely no idea and honestly, I thought you could help me..."

"Sorry honey", Lars added as he was playing with his drumsticks, pretending he was playing on invisible drums. "Jaymz is the best when it's about keeping secrets or hiding informations".

"Oh yes, he is...", you answered with a smirk, taking a sip of the hot drink, wondering when your boyfriend would show up to put an end to this mystery.

And just at the thought of him, his truck was heard outside, roaring into the parking area until he stopped the engine.

"There he is!", Jason said as he peeped through he window. "and...oh oh...", you saw the bassist opening his eyes like if he had noticed something. "NO he didn't!".

You frowned even more at his words, wondering what was happening. But soon enough you got your answer...James finally came into the room, joining you all and you discovered the big change he had done with his hair.

Everyone reacted to it of course, some laughed, others couldn't believe their eyes. And you, well. You just stared, eyes and mouth opened, realizing slowly that your boyfriend had cut those beautiful long hair of his you loved to do a mullet instead.

When he had finished greeting everyone, he came over you, wearing a proud grin on his face.

"So...", he started, hands on his hips, "do you like it baby?". He posed then to show his haircut in different angles.

"I...hum...", you mumbled, searching for the right words. You didn't want to disappoint him but honestly, you didn't like it...

"You?", he added, encouraging you to speak and it was worst. You couldn't lie to him. So you sighed and pouted, feeling sorry already for the words you were about to say...

"I'm sorry James, I don't like it...". You saw his smile fading away and you felt bad for it so you quickly added, "but if you like it then it's great!", hoping this would comfort him.

"I do like it"!, he defended himself, crossing his arms. "And I thought you'd have too ! But seems like no one does!", he complained, even pouted slightly and you felt bad.

"I know James but...you have to understand it's really...unusual and very 80s", you told him, still feeling bad.

"Well I like it and I'll keep it!", he declared and you didn't talk about his haircut anymore...

...until a few few days later.

Lying down on a deck chair, enjoying the beautiful spring sun, you were focusing on some papers you need to read for your job. James was out too, a few meters away, cutting some wood pieces with his axe for the next winter.

Lost in your thoughts for a second, proceeding to understand something you just read, you looked up from your paper and your gaze landed on him. He was wearing a black short, his working boots and had taking off his flannel shirt he had tied up around his waist. Some what drops were rolling from his forehead to his cheeks, some of his long hair were stuck on his back due to the sweat.

And this is how you realized that this haircut was absolutely sexy on him. It awaken you something primal, something you've never felt or thought before. He truly looked like a strong wood man and this was exciting.

James stopped his task for a moment, grabbed the bottle of water he let near the tree trunk and drank a big gulp, some water even ran along his bare chest. And soon he noticed your glance in his peripheral vision, smirking as he put the bottle down, wiping his lips with his palm.

"Enjoying the view baby?", his question put you out of your trance. You blinked a few times before you realized he had caught you. You blushed and smirked at him too, biting your lips.

"Forget what I said a few days ago..."

"About?", he wondered, walking over you with his axe on his shoulder. You looked more at him with sparkling eyes, biting your lips.

"Your haircut is absolute sexy". James frowned at first but then cracked a laughter at her revelation.

"Sexy uhm?...what made you change your mind sweetheart? A few days ago, you told me it was horrible".

"I don't care anymore. I changed my mind. Come here you sexy man!", you giggled as you grabbed him by his shirt's sleeve, ready to embrace those primal needs you were feeling...

A/N : I love those asks about James hairstyles! The mullet is definitely one of his most iconic one. I personally like it but I know some don't lol. Thanks for asking this sweet anon, hope you'll like it :)

[vibratingskull]

First time making a request, so if I do something wrong, I’m sorry!

This idea is inspired by another request about Thrawn and his s/o reuniting in ep6 of Ahsoka, which I loved btw. So, s/o (reader) realised she/they were pregnant shortly after Thrawn disappeared and so when they reunite, Thrawn is meeting his child (that he didn’t know existed) for the first time and his s/o is so happy because she/they never thought they’d meet. I really want to see how Thrawn would react to finding out he has a child and that he missed the first 9(ish) years of their life, I feel like he’d be so soft towards his s/o and child but also so enraged (even if he doesn’t show it) that he missed so much of his child’s life. Either fem!reader or gn!reader is okay, whichever works for you!

Anyway, I hope this made sense. Have a great day!

You did good anon, don't worry! ❤️

Thrawnxf!reader but no pronouns used

You place yourself between your daughter and the Great Mothers by instinct. You keep them at bay, holding her tiny hand in yours, she looks at them curious but they look at her like a predator would a prey. Casually, you reveal your blaster attached to your hips. You already got troubles to get Morgan to accept your daughter for the trip, you’re not gonna let some witches take her. 

They avert their gazes, slowly turning away.

Good.

Suddenly you hear a long loud hollow sound resonate in the sky. Your daughter presses herself against your leg, digging her nails in the fabric of your tunic.

“It is okay, Thooken.” you comfort her, caressing her head “It’s your father coming.”

She raises her gaze to you, you can see fear and apprehension but also a hint of hope.

“We’ll see dad today?” she asks with a little voice.

“He is the Grand Admiral, show some respect!” Morgan shouts over the noise.

You give her black look, she’s really getting on your nerves lately. The only reason you’re all here is thanks to you manipulating Ahsoka Tano to retrieve the map and recommending Baylan and Shin for the mission and she got the dirty habits to place herself as the leader of the expedition. One day you’ll end it all up with a bullet at the back of her skull.

“Cut her some slack, she can call him dad and however she pleases” you bite back “Contrary to you.”

She gives you a dirty look and you smirk at her in response. The exact same word resonates in both of your mind

Bitch.

You feel air movement in your back and spin to discover the Chimaera in all her glory. Your smile broaden. Thooker opens her eyes round like saucers.

“What’s that?” she mumbles.

“This is an ISD, sweety.” you take her in your arms, she grew a lot lately, soon you won’t be able to carry her anymore “This is the ship of your father.”

“Dad commands a ship this big?!” she goes into raptures.

“He used to command a whole fleet of ISDs.” you explain, kissing her cheek.

Her expression darkens.

“What if he doesn’t want to meet me?” she asks full of doubt “what if he doesn’t want me.”

“Oh, my sweet. Of course he wants to meet you. I am sure it is most dear wish.” You lie to her.

Unfortunately you didn’t have time to announce Thrawn the great news of your pregnancy back then, he never knew that was about to become a father. You wish you had the time, it would have been another reason for him to hold on for ten years, as of now you don’t even know in which shape you’ll meet him. Maybe he has been mutilated or became disabled, knowing he had a child somewhere in the galaxy would have given him comfort during dark times…

The Chimaera positions herself over the stone structure and slowly goes down, revealing to you an army of Stormtroopers in ranks, their armors seem patched up and hold on with red ribbons. You bite your cheek, life is not easy around here.

Suddenly they all start chanting the name of your lost husband.

That’s new…

Thrawn used to hate those displays of blind obedience. They had to adapt, it seems like.

A figure starts to descend the ally of stormtroopers, taking it’s time. 

You recognize him instantly.

Your husband.

Your loved one.

Thrawn.

Your heart sing and flutters at his sight.

You designate him to Thooken with a smile but she recoils over herself in your arms.

Morgan Elsebeth walks to place herself in the front and you can’t help but shake your head at her behavior. Baylan and Shin remain in the back, more respectful and humble.

“What was first just a dream has become a frightening reality for those who may oppose us.” he says with a smirk. “Great Mothers, I salute you.”

You smile blissfully.

Finally.

You are reunited!

What a blessing.

“Soon we should all escape this exile thanks to the help of Morgan Elsbeth.” 

Morgan bows with a smile.

“I am ever your servant, Grand Admiral.” she says with a fawning voice.

You remain in the back, managing your effect.

“They brought a prisoner.” one of the Mothers speaks.

“You never spoke of this.” he seems puzzled but not necessarily surprised.

They continue talking about Sabine Wren, Baylan reveals it’s thanks to him she’s there. Thrawn's attention is fully focused on them, giving you time to investigate Thooken’s behavior peacefully.

“What’s wrong, sweety?” you murmur.

“I am scared.” she pleas “What if he doesn’t love me?”

“Oh, my love.” you squeeze her tight “What father doesn’t love his daughter to death?”

She looks at you dead in the eyes.

“Tarkin.”

Ouch. Touché.

“He’s not Tarkin, sweety. He will love you like you’ve never been loved before, I promise.”

She circles her arms around your neck, hiding her face from everyone else.

“You are quite right… She will be of great use to us.” Thrawn nods with a light grin to Baylan before turning back to Morgan “What other great news do you bring to me on this day?”

Morgan seems taken aback, what great news? All news are bad lately, except yours.

“I have got one.” You announce clearly, revealing yourself to him.

His pupils widen at your sight, his light grin broadens.

“(Y/n), I was starting to wonder where you could be.” he says, amused and, you think, relief.

You come closer with love in your eyes, holding your daughter firmly.

“Who that might be in your arms?” he asks, tilting his head legitimately curious.

You turn your head to Thooken but she grips you tighter, refusing to budge.

“Little one?” he calls gently, he pushes a strand of hair behind her ears, revealing her blue skin to him.

You see him freeze. It lasted less than a second but you didn’t miss it.

“Thooken.” you encourage her.

Her grip loosen a tad and she deigns turning her head to meet her father. They cross their gaze and he stares at her, his knuckle grazing her cheek, with a shocked and puzzled expression. She immediately hides in the crook of your neck.

“She’s a bit shy.” you explain, caressing her back.

“It is quite okay…” he says lowly, still shocked. “She must be tired by this trip, as are all of you.” He exclaims for everyone to hear, recovering his serious demeanor. “You should use the remainder of the day to recover some energy. Captain Enoch, please escort them to their quarters.”

----------------------------------------------------------

“He doesn't like me!” You sweetheart laments, seated on the bed while you freshen up in the bathroom. You’re surprised the room got one.

“Of course he does. He’s just a little shocked.” you come back into the chamber “He never was really demonstrative, give him some time.”

She keeps her gaze low, she’s really sad. You come hug her on the bed.

“He loves you very much already, his whole world just got shaken up.”

She buries her head in the fabric of your shirt and you remain like that for a minute when you hear knocks on the door.

It’s Enoch.

“The Grand Admiral wants to see you both.”

you walk in the cold stone corridors of the citadel, following the curious trooper without a word. You finally reach a large door where Enoch leaves you.

“Ready?” You ask Thooken.

She just gulps.

You knock and open the door. Thrawn immediately stands up from his desk with an holographic map.

“(Y/n)...” He exclaims like he doesn’t believe it himself.

You throw yourself at him with a satisfied sigh, you hug him tight, revelling in his presence and scent. It’s been so long…

He seizes your face and kisses you languorously. You moan of pleasure against his soft lips, squeezing him.

“Ten years…” he whispers, eyes in yours.

“We are here now, love.” you caress his cheek “We can all go home now.”

He smiles at you before his gaze ends up on Thooken. He takes a step towards her, unsure like she would run away at any movement. She doesn’t move back but doesn’t move towards him either.

He kneels, placing himself at her level. He extends his hand to her, palm open.

“Let me see your face.” he gently asks.

She closes the gap after an hesitation. He holds her face between his two hands, all words seem to escape him.

“What is your name, young lady?”

“Thooken.” she reveals.

“Thooken.” he repeats “And how old are you?”

“9 years old.”

His thumbs caress her cheeks almost mind-absently.

“Maker.” He whispers “I had planned all the possibilities for today, but you managed to surprise me, Thooken.”

“It’s… a good thing?” she asks with a bit of fear in the tone.

“It is a very good thing. A marvelous thing.” He pulls her gently into a hug, manipulating her small body like the most fragile thing in the galaxy.

You smile when you see her hugging him back.

“Dad…” she mumbles with cracks in the voice.

“I am here my dear.” he comforts her, “I am with you now.”

“We are all together.” you say, putting a hand on his shoulder “And we will remain together.”

“Indeed.” he says with a hard tone “I will need to settle the score with Bridger. He robbed me of so much.” he spites.

He parts with Thooken and kisses her cheek before standing up to look at you.

“A chance we got his friend in a cell, she can be of some use to me.”

“I thought you would honor Baylan's engagement?” you frown.

“It was before I realized he deprived me of my child. I can not let that go unpunished.” 

You look into his red eyes to realize that his decision is taken and there is no changing his mind now.

You would almost pity Bidger.

But it is all his fault, after all.

@Bluechiss @thrawnalani @justanothersadperson93 @al-astakbar @thrawnspetgoose

☆Tag list

[patty-the-otterette]

I have finally slept well, so I'm ready to share my impressions regarding my 1st Joker Out gig of this year (3rd in total), this time in Kraków.

Ahhh!!! It was amazing! I loved that the guys were dressed in the colours of Polish flag 🇵🇱It was so cute and it suited them well! Watching the streams of previous gigs of the current tour, I wasn't very much convinced about more "casual" outfits (I'm a huge fan of Stožice outfits and their variations - Kris in the white outfit in Warsaw - my jaw literally dropped 😲), although now I really love them! It's just a different phase :)

The stage was pretty small and I was staying on my "casual" Jan and Nace side. I just love looking at them 😍 how they have fun with each other, either by walking around one another with stupid looks, playing peekaboo with a Polish flag, or when Nace is rubbing Jan's shoulder when the other one is pretty tired after the gig. I just love those two 😍😍

I loved all the songs, especially those with more intense guitar riffs (Šta bih ja, Everybody's waiting - second part, Ne bi smel, Plastika) where I could really lose myself in the music.

As during the previous gigs, I'm in such awe when it comes to Bojan managing the crowd. He always knows what to answer, it shows his great experience on the stage ofc, but it's more than that! He's just... right person in the right place. For example, when a girl invited him to her prom he said: "But there's five of us, it will be funny, all of us dancing in a circle 😂😂😂 ", showing appropriate gestures

Or when people started saying they have birthday 🎂 that day, after another person said that he was "Now you're lying 🤥😂" and he sang "Happy birthday EVERYONE" 😂.

Btw, it's my birthday today 🥳 and that's not a lie 😊

I really enjoyed this gig and I can't wait for the next one! Next stop - Antwerp! Who's coming there? ;)

Enjoy my very bad photos, but I like them anyway 😜

Aha! And Jan in "Jan pierdolę" shirt and Adidas tracksuit! To give you a wider context - the phrase "Ja pierdolę!" where "Ja" means "I", can be translated into "Oh, fuck!", and, from my own experience, it can be used in different contexts - either to express irritation, anger, but sometimes also excitement. The name "Jan" is very same both in Polish and Slovenian, both in writing and in pronunciation. It was so funny 🤣 to see him in this t-shirt!

[ratcandy]

I have returned in your inbox once again after a long time because I got reminded of the existence of cogr again. i am like a cockroach who cannot be exterminated because... there is a zote nosk (food) on your counter table 🔥🔥

I have a funny headcanon about the superiors in the den, other than being winged and feral women (mostly) with ridiculously long names that they look like they mauled a keyboard to insert dominance as they just screeched to the keyboard to give them a painstakingly long name for DOMINANCE!! (an order from its superior)

But what if.. they often do superior talks and gossip in the afternoon about the latest nosk drama and whatever nosks talk about.. other than murder, blood and to probably brag about the recent 1 kg morsel they snatched from a nosk hatchling (it was weak btw for being 1 day old. Not very noskly of you 🍅🍅🍅 that is so zotey NOT ✨️NOSKLY✨️).

i would also like to imagine that they all have offspring so it's something they will brag and talk because imagine having offspring to kill you and to take your place, that is so noskly!! *+1 nosk approval*

Imagine zote's mom being in the part of the group talking about nosk gossip, drama, lame superior bragging stuff and murder.

And then one of the superiors would start to brag how their offspring will kill them someday and to take their place as a superior to continue the bloodline and stuff whatever about their nosk offspring they have with their mates they held in gunpoint to mate with them (its orders from your superior, procreate with me now). I imagine that zote's mom would be Hella nervous and embarrassed since obviously... *You know* she would likely try to change topic whatever if she was even asked her offspring.

Likely in those topics, she will 100% avoid from those topics from being bullied, ridiculed, and to be made as a joke from her fellow superiors in the superior council for having weak offspring if they don't know, she would likely probably lie to them to say..

"i have only one son and it's "hunter donning of tiktik, idk who tf is that kid but that is not mine ew" *zote's mom sweats and says this in a fancy nosk dialogue whatever* or she would say it's just a rumor, I have so many haters here

or it would be funny for her to FAKE zote's age to say, "oh.. he is not a runt, he is justtt 1 day old and I just laid him yesterday, I likely believe he will have potential in unaliving me to continue the tradition and the fate i long off" *zote's mom glares at zote's dad to say, "bitch you better promise to change that "thing i laid you begged me to spare or i will kill you in the most gruesome way possible for embarrassing me, my own long with name with 46873 letters, my bloodline as well"* (NOSK DAD SWEATS. WHAT DOES NOSK DAD DO..LEAVE AND RUN DAD RUNNN AAAAAA)

But I am just sure that zote's very existence and the fact that he is the offspring of the superior, he is not only just weak in the nosk den but he is own to be peak pathetic in history of hallownest and in today and the worst part.. HE IS ALIVE...and OH NO.. ZOTE'S MOM IS GOING TO BE KNOWN AS THE SUPERIOR WITH OFFSPRING SO WEAK THAT EVERYONE IN HALLOWNEST CALLS HIM BIG PISS BABY AND KNOWN FOR THAT FOREVER NOOOOOOO... (i am sorry mamma, you have to accept your noskly baby is a transgender mushroom who rambles about their woes, do you want to read "camouflage of the great renown?! Like the chapter he talks bad about you and all chapters he trash-talks about nosk kind?)

So I believe that the superiors would talk behind her back to make fun of the fact that she had the weakest offspring in bug history and she choose to keep him alive. They would definitely humiliate her and mock her to say she probably has love goo goo eyes for mating one of the biggest losers in the den and to gossip if to say she also has motherly love for her offspring which is why she didn't choose to kill zote.

I can image Superior Kexadallaferfirin looking at whatever zote is doing and laughing in front of her to say, "geezz your offspring is so pathetic that he is memorable for being one of the most sad meow meows in not only the nosk den, but IN ENTIRE hallownest HAHAHAHAHA"

Superior Vorkalazelroth would say something like"what do you see in that loser did you mated? Cmon girl I know you have needs but you are a superior.. Did you have feelings for your mate and offspring? How lovely dovely of you mother~ ❤️❤️" *She giggles*

Superior Kalxaitvoitre would say "your offspring is terribly disappointing to look at that it feels to be second hand embarrassment to be next besides your side, I would rather give birth to a measly dirtcraver than to whatever tf you and your mate created ew"

This would build up her already low temper and hearing the snickering and mockery from her superiors maw, I would like to think that she would either screech at them to shut up, hung her head low in embarrassment and shame, and storm down upset but all which she will take out her anger on her lovely husband for the embarrassment she had birthed in the world.

I would like to imagine that zote's dad to like drag her away in those superior gossips and to say "hush hush yea um... darling they are not laughing at you, they are laughing at that nosk who tripped i swear"

Zote mom: "that is a fucking dirtcraver, I am not stupid, they ARE LAUGHING AT US YOU FUCKING NITWI-*

But if zote's dad is atleast witty and smart to buy her time from preventing her to maul him to blame for all the embarrassment she faced in daily. He would make an excuse to say, "he is young, please give him time, you know not everyone is strong at first, they become strong sooner at later, soon whatever Superior Kexadallaferfirin is gossiping about us, she will soon be in SHOCK *he starts to make exploding sound in his maw* to see his hidden potential someday *he sweats harder than he is cooking and it's himself*

Zotes mom: *rolls eyes* "Ok I am giving you time because uh... I like your energy and whatever.. and I reflected the main reason why I choose to mate with you because... you are efficient hunter yea, but YOU BETTER PROMISE ME THAT THIS THING... WILL NOT BE A DISGRACE TO MY BLOODLINE SKREEEE"

*Zote's dad who just pissed the floor and tries to look tough but he looks like he is crying and shivering* "Y-y-yes I will.. raise... him mm to toughen..up like .. I promised.. to be an efficient hunter like me.... uh you see me during courting.. yea"

*Zote's mom hand palms (claw palms?) And rolls her eyes at the same time as she hears another giggle from the maws of Superior Kalxaitvoitre, Superior Vorkalazelroth, and Superior Kexadallaferfirin making jokes about her for the millionth time*

I think most fo the nosk den would think the same as the superiors but most of them are not brave or knew that is a death sentence for a painful death, so most would likely talk behind her back..

Ghost nosk (hunter donning of two horned vessel): I can't believe that the weakest thing that ever walked in hallownest soul is in here and it's the offspring of the superior that gave me an order just last hour *he giggles*

Hornet nosk (hunter donning of two horned weaver): she likely has motherly affections for her wormly children i bet

*They both laugh*

*Zote's mom appears and gives them the hardest stare of hey bitches i heard what you're saying*

Zote's mom: Repeat. that. again.

Ghost nosk: "uh.. we are laughing about the nosk that just tripped and it's very funny" *points are dirtcraver and sweats*

Hornet nosk: it's very funny yea... *gets a heart attack*

Zote's mom: that. Is. A dirtcraver.

OK. There's so much in here I am so excited. Let's go through this one piece atta time

Something about the superiors being described as "winged feral women (mostly)" has opened my eyes to how silly they sound as a concept. i mean you're not wrong. that is in fact what the superiors are. but that's making me giggle

As for superior gossip oh yes I like to think so. I've had in my brain that they have regular meetings to discuss Stuff and Things, and shittalking their fellow denmates is probably something that happens. A Lot. "I hate that weakling donning mask of gruzzer I think I should slaughter them posthaste" and everyone nods along like yeess queen slay.

BUT AS FOR THE REST OF YOUR ASK. Ohh man.

The thing is, Zote's Mom is... scary. She's violent, she's cold, and she earned her place as a superior for a reason. She's very Strong and Not Afraid to murder. Lower-ranked nosks know to stay out of her way, and the other superiors. Well.

I think when Zote was hatched and was kept alive by his father, any scrutiny held for his Mother would be kept secret. If the other superiors thought it reflected poorly on her for letting her mate do what he did - which they absolutely would - they would Not be stupid enough to say so to her face unless they wished to die.

Because like. She would kill them. A superior would be like "Sharp in claw but dull in mind, it would seem. You allow your mate to keep that wretched spawn alive, and for what purpose? Is it trust you harbor, or affection?" and in response Mama would, in fact, kill them in front of the entire den

So any teasing done on Mama would have to be quiet. Discrete. Just between the other superiors. Should she hear them even snicker amongst themselves she would rear her head in like "Idiot says what?" and claw the throat out of the first one to respond

Outside of that she would absolutely deny Zote was ever her offspring, though! Weakest cringefail bitch in the den does NOT belong to me, I did not birth that thing, and I did not choose his equally cringefail father (that last part is also a lie of course).

And as for Dad. well they can make fun of him as much as they want. He's not a superior, he can't fight back without dying, and Mama won't stick up for him. They could kill him if they wanted to and she wouldn't do a damn thing

the "look at that nosk who tripped" / "that's a fucking dirtcarver" exchange has ABSOLUTELY happened in the den though jklhKMGJKFHJHF.

but yeass.s... Mama bullying. She can't know about it or she'll start killing people. But she should be bullied I think. Yes

[boyfridged]

I miss precrisis Bruce... like what the fuck happened to him at today's era and why he is characterize as an abusive asshole?

this is an interesting question because i don't actually think he is consistently characterized as an abusive asshole, especially not in the last couple of years. it happens, of course, and it brings in a lot of attention specifically because it's controversial– like gotham war, or king's iteration, or lobdell's whump– but there are plenty of writers who are quite persistent in their propagation of bruce as a loving & caring character – this is for example what zdarsky was so liked for before the current event (the famous "lollipop scene"), what tynion was set on during his run, and what williamson seems to want to achieve in batman and robin (or at least this is my impression from what i've seen, as i haven't read it yet). and it's not like there were not similar attempts to bring in some of pre-crisis-esque personality back.

the reason for which pre-crisis bruce is pre-crisis bruce is not just his personality; it's not that he is strangely modest for the circumstances or sweet to people around him as a rule or even gregarious by default. it's because he is portrayed in a very human, ordinary way. and the reason for which he is human is his civilian life and the civilian cast. we get to see bruce as a friend, as a lover, as a socialite, and as a father because his civilian persona is actually real. pre-crisis bruce does not have a social life just to gather "intel." it's not an undercover "brucie" mission. it is his life. and it's nowhere as grand as what contemporary comics make it to be, btw (@roobylavender has recently written a great post about how bruce's fame became more and more exaggerated).

but post-crisis, things around bruce change in many ways, and gotham is nowhere as cosy when it comes to the portrayal of its communities. bruce is also not really a father anymore (and in my opinion he never truly is one again at all). and in place of the vigilante lifestyle that was much slower, emergencies that were usually much more local, we have a major crisis after a major crisis. this is nowhere compatible with who bruce used to be.

in other words, pre-crisis bruce simply cannot exist in post-crisis; because the world is wider, because he's barely a civilian anymore, because the part of him that is a civilian is also just another mask. and part of it is just bad writing that i do not appreciate. but, i am not gonna lie, i do believe some of it also makes sense.

personally, i would not like to see bruce coming back to his pre-crisis personality all of a sudden, because it's horror material rather than a retcon that could be achieved seamlessly. and i think this is one of the reasons why batman of the last couple of years fails to bring back these qualities even though at times it seems they want to. the editorial wants bruce to be an ordinary man again but they also cannot compromise and by necessity keep all the edge and grandiose of the current era. they also fail to understand that it does not matter if bruce is not a 1% anymore if he still has no real civilian cast around. and finally, after all the tragedies, it would be disturbing to see bruce unchanged. so all i ask is just acknowledgment that he used to be different. i always talk about it but dc retconning their timelines to preserve the same characterisation is one of their biggest mistakes. let the characters be dynamic. let there be development, for better or worse.

sorry, this got away from me! i do miss pre-crisis bruce. i do. but i don't think he's coming back, nevermind bruce being asshole or not (and he also was not always an angel pre-crisis. obv. he could be an asshole too if he felt like it.)