#toby will have PTSD

[dare0451]

i desperately need rebecca sugar, nd stevenson, and toby fox to team up on a project made Explicitly For Adults. theyre all visionaries of horrifyingly toxic queer relationships being held back by their art being aimed at kids. somebody let those bitches off the leash!!!

[sicpvon]

What character was it?

rye you're bringing my demons to light

but I will answer

the character was Science!Sans, specifically the science sans from a comic where a handful of au!sans-es got together in the void and had a Christmas party.

my old user name was ScienceSnanzy, once upon a time on an app that no longer is available on any app store

here he is. he is lovingly referred to as "Sci"

[theredharlotybf]

Hi! I just read your post, If your requests are open then I’d love to ask for anything with Toby! I’m absolutely starved for any SFW content about him—but NSFW is also very appreciated if that’s your vibe 👀

Honestly, I just want to give you full creative freedom, but I’m also super curious about your headcanons for him. So really, anything at all would totally make my day 💖 Thanks either way!

AN: Hi everyone! Hope no one minds how long this is, my first time writing headcannons, not a professional yet but hopefully i get there soon.

Ticci Toby Headcannons

Disclaimer: Blood, Violence, Gore, Bullying, Seccual content, I make these up as I go, don't judge me.

PERSONAL HEADCANONS

Toby, Toby, Toby. Where do we start with Toby?

I know a lot of people see a hyperactive and silly goofy guy so, not a lot of people really take him seriously.But he is so much more than that.

Born with all those mental disorders does a number on you, especially at such a young age. He never learned how to interact with other people his age- his tourette syndrome which led others to call him ‘Ticci Toby? He never had a real friend in his life.

Of course, there was his older sister Lyra who always did her best to protect him. What with their abusive father screaming abuse at him, Lyra and the mother- taking his rage out on Toby by beating him while in a drunken frenzy. Even in those times, Lyra came to his defense- taking some of those punches even though she knew he couldn’t feel pain due to his CIPA.

I imagine their mother at the time would dissociate whenever their father was like this, just pretend it didn't happen and put herself somewhere else. A lot of people do this when in situations concerning domestic violence- but since she was too focused on protecting her own mental state- she completely forgot about the safety and wellbeing of both Toby and Lyra.

Then came the accident. Both Toby and Lyra were driving home one night after going to see a movie when all of sudden- a drunk driver is carelessly carousing on the wet and slippery backroad to their house and crashes into them. Lyra is killed on Impact and Toby- thanks to his CIPA is unfazed- but is forced to watch his sister die right before him. His safe space and only friend. But even after her funeral, his mother kept on dissociating and his father just got worse- the beatings, the verbal abuse…..the voices.

He was angry-he was depressed, he was losing his sanity.

How do you help a boy like Toby who is diagnosed with Schizophrenia, Bipolar disorder, ADHD and to top it all off- PTSD, who lost his sister in a gruesome way- his father abusing him in every way he knows and his mother- playing blind to all of it.

It wasn’t fair, it wasn’t fucking fair. Why did it have to be Lyra who died and not their dad? Hell- their mother can die too for all he cares- if she did- neither him nor Lyra would be in this mess. But running away wouldn’t have solved anything- he was still a minor. If he ran away from home- police would simply find him and drag him right back.

That is…. If he had a home to return to…

The solution was staring him right in the face- they told him the answer- yet he didn’t want to see it. But the minute he picked up those hatchets, gripping the handles in both hands, he no longer felt afraid.

He never knew killing could be so cathartic before swinging those hatchets down into his father- the beautiful smell of metal coating his skin as his father’s blood squirted onto him as if it were a geyser. The look of terror in his eyes that looked far too much like his sisters. He plucked them out and squished them under his boots. His screams rang throughout the garage and ironic as it is, his mother finally snapped out of it when she realised her son was murdering her husband.

While his mother called the police- he took a canister of gasoline and a match, setting fire to the neighborhood. He wouldn’t let the police take him- for something that was his right and yet- when the fires set in around him- the only thing he could think about was Lyra.

If he died, he knew there was a chance he might see her again- but he knew there was only one place he was going and it surely wasn’t heaven.

“Toby….. My child….”

The voices in his head had come again, his strength- had come in the form of an eight foot tall man with no eyes, no nose or mouth. A faceless being who stood among the burning trees, looking down at his helpless figure as he struggled to breathe

“This is not the end for you…. Your work has only begun…”

Before he blacked out, a searing burn was felt on his back, Toby had become the Slendermans’s proxy- and yet…. He didn’t hate it.

Toby felt as though he had ascended from the frightened and helpless boy he once was to a man- a servant of the Operator with the duty to murder any and all his Master deems as a target. He was strong, he was powerful and he had the backing of the most dangerous entity in the world.

Strangely enough- his master had other Proxies working for him. Two men called Tim and Brain, a bit older than Toby but more or less on the saner side. Tim was quite irritant and cranky while Brain was silent but sarcastic when he wanted to be. They clearly had some baggage but Toby wasn’t all that interested in knowing- both Tim and Brian- or rather, Masky and Hoodie were simply co-workers. One of them would always go for the kill, and the other would always film it.

Then came Kate, a new Proxy for their master. She never spoke a word and yet everyone could sense her bloodlust every time she walked into a room. She was not to be fucked with and Toby could respect that. Everyone just left everyone the fuck alone, get the jobs done and be done with it.

Though, a lot had changed in terms of his lifestyle. ((Realistically, there is no Slender Mansion ;-;))

Slenderman’s domain was spread out within the forest of the countryside, along with plenty of abandoned cabins ((Squatting in some or killing the original owners and taking it for themselves)). Even though Toby was a man now- he had to adapt to being an adult quickly- sure he could murder people and take their money- but it wasn’t as steady of an occupation as you would imagine, I mean, not every victim they come across is swimming in money so- they had to get jobs.

Toby has multiple jobs, working as a farmhand, a lumberjack, he even picked up some mechanical work after wrapping his head around it- guess it did help that his dad was a mechanic.

Now he fixes Masky’s car and Hoodies’s truck and they pay him back with either cash, cigarettes- alcohol. All the same to him.

He only wears his mouth guard when hunting- when he’s out in public, he puts a gauze over his cheek where he chewed through.

Sleeper build for days- yet has such an unhealthy diet of take out, microwave dinners and tinned food. This boy can’t cook to save his life.

MEETING TOBY

How would you meet Toby? He is quite the solitary creature, he won’t leave the forest if he can help it- the only times he ventures into the city is when he has a target there or when it's his turn to shop for supplies.

He won’t go to you so you go to him.

You live a stressful life with your own shit to deal with- a breakdown was imminent and when you crashed out, you realized this lifestyle wasn’t for you and getting away from the hustle and bustle of the city was just what you needed.

You bought an old Cabin nearly twenty years old, the owner went missing years ago and presumed dead, since then, it's just been sitting on the market place- waiting to be bought. You jumped at the opportunity, taking your pets and moving to the countryside. 

When you get there with the real estate agent- you notice some belongings, men's clothes, old food in the fridge- the agent tells you its most likely squatters but judging by the rotting food in the fridge, the squatters haven’t been here in a while and called up a locksmith to come and change all the locks in the house free of charge since no one knew the residence was being lived in.

Though, you did feel bad about whoever was living here, you understood times could get tough, hence why after scrubbing the fridge clean, you threw the old clothes in the wash, hanging them up to dry and then folding them neatly and leaving them in a box.

The previous owner of the cabin was an older man who enjoyed hunting, the house was decorated in taxidermied animals and it wasn’t really for you, preferring to put all of them up for auction instead. Over the next few weeks, you got to cleaning up the cabin, replacing old furniture with new ones and stuff from your old home. You brightened up the place with fresh coats of paint, new curtains and carpet, replacing the broken windows and fixing all the creaky doors yourself. Even installing an automatic dog door for your pets so they can come in and out themselves.

You planted flowers at the front of the cabin while starting your own little vegetable garden. The old smell of tobacco and musk was replaced with scented candles and the smell of your new hobby, baking. You had completely transformed the old cabin and it had become more like home.

Little did you know- this little home of yours was one of the less frequently used hideouts for Ticci Toby.

And when he first laid eyes upon it, he was shocked. Sure, he has his main cabin deeper in the woods- but this hideout was one that none of the other proxies knew about- and it pissed him off. Who the hell moved into his place? Was the previous owner not warning enough?

He walked up to the front door and- “Oh! Hello!”

He didn’t notice the comfy swing seat at the end of the porch, there you were, your knees tucked to your chest, a book in hand, your pet cuddled up to and by your seat was a small table with a glass of lemonade. You were careful not to bother your snoozing baby as you placed your book down and stood up. “Can I help you sir?”

Toby’s mind went completely blank. He couldn’t put words into what he was feeling but something about you just looked….. Sweet. You didn’t look like a bad person, you were wearing blue slippers with cartoon animals, a large sweater over some leggings.

“I…. left some stuff here…” He muttered. He didn’t know what else to say. You just nodded your head. “Ah, just wait one second then.” You opened the front door and headed inside the house, he peeked inside and noticed that the once yellow walls were gone, a fresh white coat brightened up the home, new furniture, a new flat screen t.v. to replace the old one with the big fat back. He could even smell something sweet and tasty cooking.

You re-emerged from the home, carrying a box full of his clothes, clean and folded. He didn’t remember cleaning them when he last left. “I have some cherry pie in the oven, would you like some?”

“Oh- I don’t think…” He couldn’t talk anymore where you got your oven mitts and took the pie out of the oven, the delicious smell making his stomach growl. You packed him up a slice of pie in some tupperware. He was confused, surely you would have realised he was the one previously squatting in your home, yet you washed his clothes and gave him some dessert?

“You take care of yourself…. Mr?”

“Toby… Just Toby…” He muttered.

“Toby… that's a good name, you looked after yourself Toby, and enjoy that pie!”

He went back to his main hideout, wiping off a dirty spoon on his trousers before using it to eat your cherry pie. It was good. Very good. He couldn’t remember the last time he enjoyed a homemade pie. Actually, now that he thinks about it- he can’t seem to remember any positive memories of having dinner. Mom just made dinner, no starters, mains or… desserts. She just just made everyone a plate and that was it.

He went back to see you, he had to see you again.

But only this time, you weren’t aware he was there.

It was annoying at first because you always got up super early and he wasn’t exactly a morning person. You would get up and water your plants, refill the bird feeder and you made breakfast that looked way too healthy and some type of tea he knew wasn’t that good. You also went for a walk with your pet which gave him time to sneak into the cabin. He found out your name, your age, your birthday, even your blood type. He even managed to get access to your laptop since you didn’t turn it off. He went through your emails and a bit more digging- he found out about your breakdown after someone continuously harassed you at your last home and that your doctor advised you to ease your stress levels and live a more relaxed life, a new place where no one knew where you lived but it wasn’t what he would call a relaxed life, seeing as you liked to keep yourself busy.

You worked from home now and only went to work if there was an important meeting. But you mostly kept to yourself, alone in that cabin with your pets- he wanted to talk to you again- he wanted to get to know you, he wanted to find out what it was about you that drew him in.

So, he kidnapped your pet.

Yes, dick move, he knows- but what you don’t know doesn’t hurt you and after a day of watching you run about, crying your eyes out, yelling for your baby to come home- he reappears, with your pet- saying he found them by his home nearby.

You wept for joy, taking your pet into your arms, smothering them with love and affection, vowing to never let them leave your sight again while taking Toby for bringing them back to you.

You invite Toby back to your home and offer him something to drink. You make him and yourself some coffee while allowing your pet to snack on their favorite treats. You respectfully inquire about the gauze on Toby’s cheek and there he tells you he was born with CIPA and accidentally chewed through his own cheek- it freaks people out to see it and that he hides it.

You then get worried because you gave him some pie last time you saw him and imagined how hard it would be to eat with a missing cheek. He chuckled, telling you he mastered eating his food on the one side of his mouth. He thanks you for looking after his belongings- and didn’t realise he left them behind.

You safely assumed he was a squatter until he said that he and the man who lived in the house before you used to be ‘acquaintances’, that they would hunt together on occasion which made your cheeks light up in embarrassment for assuming he was living in your house illegally. Another lie of course but the last thing he wanted was for you to think he was homeless.

Speaking of appearance- he began to wash himself more frequently, snuck away to the laundromat at the dead of night and washed all his laundry while no one was there. Even stealing cologne from a victim’s house just so he’d smell nice around you and his efforts were not unnoticed.

He would make ‘weekly’ appearances just so he could have his opportunities to interact with you by offering to do some handy work like chopping up some firewood and repairing your car (which suddenly started breaking down all the time!) and finding your pet when they ran off, you would invite him in for conversations and a meal- you once tried to get his social media but when he told you he had no social media- you found that refreshing- but at the same time, he lives out in the boonies, most people in the countryside down need social media so you just acquired a basic phone number instead.

Although his visits are ‘weekly’. He comes by your house every day to…. Keep an eye on you.

And when I say keep an eye, I mean watching you through the bushes as you tend to your garden and looking through your window as you go about your chores at home.

He was once luckily enough one night to catch you in the act- your hands under your shorts….

He never had the chance to engage in such acts but seeing you in that position was enough to make him dizzy.

But it made him stop and think- what was it about you that made him keep coming back? Sure- he found you attractive- he wasn’t ashamed to admit that but it was something more than that- despite his ticks and inconsistent mood swings- you didn’t treat him like a freak like everyone else did. He wanted to chalk it up to you having your own mental breakdown but looking at your personal info, it was more or less stress and work related anxiety that caused you to feel from society. Not that he didn’t understand how shit society was but when he interacted with you…. You never faked it.

Your warmth and kindness, not the fake smiles or carefully worded comments given to him by others. It reminds him of…. her. And suddenly, he felt like he was at home again.

His one real human connection, someone who saw him as he was and not a freak-

What the hell was thinking?

He was a murderer, a killer, a Proxy of the Slenderman. He can’t ever be human again. You didn’t know the extent of who he was- if you did- you would have gone running for the hills and never looked back.

This realization hurt- because he was really starting to become attached to you but he knew he was already crossing the line, befriending you like this. You know who he is and that was dangerous enough, he was putting the other proxies at risk and it was only a matter of time before you learned of his true identity.

He made up his made and gathered his hatchets.

He walked towards you home, both blades in hand. He didn’t want you to suffer- which is why he would make it quick and painless.

That was….. Until he saw another car in front of your house and a pet hiding under the porch- notably terrified.

He ran up to your home and saw you.

Tied up to a chair, bound and gagged as tears streaming down your face as a man who he had never seen before circled the chair you sat in while twirling a knife in his hands.

“What made you run away… darling? I’ve been with alot of women but you have to be the most ungrateful one of all! I’ve bought you the best gifts money can buy- I’ve took you on all those extravagant dates- fuck- I left my damn wife for you and you dare reject me? ME!? After everything I’ve done for!”

Toby’s first began to shake with fury- how dare this prick treat you like this?! The files… this must be the guy who was harassing you.

The guy ripped the gag from your mouth to allow you to speak.

“You never told me you were married! You lied to me from the moment we met and you try to pin this on me?! You were the one who pursued me and destroyed your own marriage! If you could cheat on your own wife- what made me think I could expect any loyalty from you? I told you as much and you still wouldn’t leave me alone- despite all those protection orders I had on you!”

“But what you and I had was true love- my wife never made me feel as fulfilled as you did- I only wanted you to know the extent of my feelings for you… then you just had to get the police involved….”

Then he stabbed the knife into your thigh

“And now, because of you- I am ruined! Everyone thinks I’m a degenerate! I got fired and my wife won’t let me see my children! We could have been happy together and you had to go and fuck it all up- now… I’m going to take my time with you… slowly.. Intimately.. I’m going to break you in every way I know how and leave your body in a ditch-”

Toby didn’t say anything else before busting down the door-  his blood raced to his face- hidden by his mouth guard and orange goggles. You both looked over at his direction, his arrival unexpected. Your stalker’s face said it all, he was terrified. Toby clearly overshadowed him with his height and physique, those two blood stained hatchets in his hands stating his intentions clearly.

“H-Hey… wait a minute there bud- lets talk about this-”

Toby didn’t give him another second before launching one of his hatchets into his chest. He screamed like a little bitch before he sauntered over to him, looking down at him. His dilated pupils studying his form through his orange goggles.

“Wanna B-break her huh? All because your a disloyal f-faggot who wasn’t worthy of a decent relationship. It's people like you that make this world so u-ugh..unbearable to live in. I’m not even gonna take my time with you…. You're not worthy of all that attention… but you’re not gonna die a painless death- that I can assure you….!”

True to his word- he ripped out the hatchet from the stalker’s chest and brought them down on him again and again, relishing in their screams until they eventually died out.

And all he could hear was your cries.

When he finally snapped out of it, he realised what he had done- you lovely kitchen which was always so clean and tidy was now saturated in blood- you were covered in the blood splattered by Toby’s reckless abandon. You shivered, crying weakly as you shivered- you were so absolutely terrified and he knew he was the cause. He wanted to run out of that cabin- to never darken your doorstep again-

“Toby… is that you?” You whimpered.

You looked up at him- with a smile breaking out into tears ago.

What happened after that was quick. He untied you, stuck you in the bathtub and let the shower head soak you as he went to clean up your kitchen as best he could, getting rid of the body and the car he came in. He let your pet back inside which gave you a lot of comfort before you rejoined him in the kitchen, wearing a fluffy bathrobe. You had a towel placed on your thigh to stop the bleeding and Toby was able to sow up your leg- using his own experience from showing up his own wounds, and yet, after he finished tending to you, you had such an empty look in your eyes.

You wanted the truth from him, no more lies.

He spilled everything, he was a deluded murderer- he killed his father and set his neighborhood on fire, he came into the service of the operator where their sole purpose is to make sacrifices in his name- how… he was planning to kill you tonight. He couldn’t lie to you, not anymore.

You were clearly taken aback- sitting on your couch and staring into space, holding your pet close to you before asking him if any of your interactions were real- was he just trying to get close to you so she would kill you.

He remembers grabbing your hands, he would never hurt you, after tonight, seeing you like that killed him so much, he never wanted to see you hurt or scared again.

You ask him to leave your house and to give you a week to think.

He obeys but not without checking his phone every five minutes- he never wanted you to hate him but if you hated him- he couldn’t live with himself. To think the only girl he ever came to care about and he fucked it up for what?

He got sloppy with his missions- targets nearly escaped and he had to hunt them down and kill them before they got away. So much so, his master confronted him about his work. And what made things worse- Slender had known about you all along. Whiched confused Toby, but his master’s reply was simple.

“I care not for your relationships outside of work but it is your job to make sure those who know of your work are kept to be indiscretion. If indulging in the flesh and company of a female is what will keep you at the top of your game- then let it be so- but if she tells anyone about you or the others…. I will dispatch her myself.”

Finally a week went by before you called again, when he came to your home- the kitchen smelt of chemicals- fresh pain and cleaning materials to remove the stains and the smell. It irritated his nose but you looked more angry. You had been through all the motions over the past week.

He asks if you and him were over and you tell him it depends on what he says.

He felt as if he was walking on thin ice before he sat down across from you. You ask if it was always his intention to kill you. He refutes this- you were always more of a curiosity, he didn’t understand why you had treated him so nicely even though he was a stranger, someone who you didn’t know. That made you even angrier, claiming it was called basic decency- that not everyone is a horrible judgemental human being- you were nice and kind to him because that's how you were with everyone- despite his disfigurement. You were hurt because of how he automatically assumed the worst of you when you met.

You also bring up the fact that he was watching you which surprised him. But you reminded him that you had a stalker before you had come to the countryside so you had recognised when someone was watching you. He admitted to watching you from afar and to looking at your private information. You had to get up from your seat- your face red with anger, betrayed at the fact that the one friend you thought you had made would do something so underhanded. That it disgusted you.

Yet- you couldn’t completely dismiss the fact that he did save you from being raped and murdered.

He asked what that guy was about. You explained that you met him at a company dinner where he asked you out, you had no objections but he brought you on super expensive dinners and good gifts like jewellery and bouquets of flowers- practically showering you with affection. That's when you knew something was up. Because if something was too good to be true, it probably is, which is why you did a deep dive into your date’s background when you found out he was married with children.

You had urged him to go back to his wife and both of you forget your affair ever existed- even though you never slept with him thank god- but he wouldn’t take no for an answer. He would show up at your house at ungodly hours and send gifts to your work. You made several complaints but no one ever took you seriously. You had a doorbell camera installed at your old residences and in one video- he left a dead bird at your door and only then people had started to take you seriously but by then- the bird was the last straw and you wanted out as fast as you could. 

You asked Toby what his angle was- you had been through enough shit as it was and if he was gonna do anything to disturb the peace you fought so hard for in your life.

He promised he had no desire to hurt you but you reminded him he came to your home that night armed and ready- if that man had not been there, torturing you- what would he have done?

He didn’t know how to answer- but he knew that no matter what, he couldn’t lose you, but what could he say? What could he say…?

“Toby… I think you should leave-”

“I l-love you.” 

His lips moved on their own, he couldn’t control his words, his voice- they forced themselves out of his mouth. You stared at him with disbelief in your eyes. “You love me? How can you say that- I don’t…”

“I screwed up…. But give me a chance… I will make it up to you for the rest of my life if that what it takes”

You didn’t want to believe him, he’s done a lot of terrible things in order to be close to you, how safe were you with him near and yet….. Just by looking at him, you can tell he’s never had a genuine relationship in his life. He was a sad….lonely…and miserable boy with not a hope in the world.

But…. you were just as alone as him. Both of you sat in that darkness- with only each other and no other person to support either of you.

SFW HEADCANONS

You wanted to start off your relationship slowly with him- if he really wanted to be with you, he would have to work to earn your trust back. Which is easier said than done, so you laid your ground rules. First and foremost- boundaries. No more was Toby going to sneak around your home nor snoop like a creep. He is to keep his nose out of your computer, phone, documents- anything confidential! If he wants to visit, he will do so during the day and he will text you beforehand and not show up randomly. 

When you found out he was the servant of this demon- god- whatever it was- you didn’t want to know. It was hard enough to stomach that he would come and go, after potentially hurting and murdering a lot of people. He would tell you these people were the scum of society- but it didn’t help to stomach it any easier. Toby could do as he pleases- just as long as he didn’t bring it to your home.

Also, he was no longer allowed anywhere near your pet after finding out he would take them just to gain your trust, and you were keeping an extra close eye on your engine. As much as Toby hated the fact he was now walking on eggshells around you- he would rather this never never speak to you again.

When he was allowed to come over- you never left his sight and you never left his. If you were gardening, he would do his best to help you- but he mostly stuck to cutting up your firewood and what not. You always made him a meal when he came over and he was always happy to eat what you made, in fact, he believed he had gained more muscle by eating your foods. But you would always make him something sweet as well.

You also did more research on his conditions as well- seeing what you could do to help better accommodate him- Toby wasn’t on any medication, he stopped any medication the day he killed his family. As worrying as that was, it wasn’t like you could make him take meds- but the specific meds he would need would have to be prescribed by a doctor and as far as anyone was concerned, Toby was dead.

You two would watch movies, play some games and sometimes, Toby would take you hiking. You visited many places where you two could sit and have lunch together- it was a nice peace.

Sooner or later, you two got to talking about each other’s past. Toby told you all about his childhood, how everyone would bully him because his tourette syndrome, how they used to beat him up but because of his CIPA, he could never feel anything, but he could feel shame because he knew they were hurting him- calling him names, like ‘Ticci’ Toby because of his ticks. And to reinforce that- sometimes he would flinch when you put your hand on him before you said anything.

To that end- you thought that physical touch was not something that he wanted, so you refrained from touching him for a while- but he hated that. He wanted you to touch him- because he would never feel comfortable with anyone else touching him. It started with you two holding hands, the rough skin of his fingers rubbing against your smooth ones.

He liked to be held and to hold you. Sometimes, when you're at the kitchen, he’ll come up behind you and loop his arms around your waist while burying his head between your neck. When you watch movies, he likes to lay his head on your lap while you run your soft fingers through his hair.

Your first kiss with him was not what you had expected- he and you had taken a trip down to a nearby lake where you rented a boat. He rowed you both out while the sun shone down on the pair of you, it was a lovely day. You decided to give Toby a peck on the cheek and he looked shocked.

For a moment, you thought you messed up before he grabbed your face and pulled his lips towards yours. You remember gasping his name as he sucked on your face as you both fell to the floor of the boat with Toby on top of you.

Toby didn’t have a lot of experience with kissing, so it was up to you to teach him how to kiss. It was awkward- teaching a guy to kiss- but Toby often gets carried away with his kisses. He kisses you everywhere that has skin exposed, your face, your neck, your fingers- your legs.

When you finally came back from the lake, your neck was full of bitemarks and hickies from Toby’s love attacks.

Toby became even bolder and bolder with his affections- he was a quick learner.

NSFW HEADCANONS 

Oooooh boy, figured we get here eventually.

Toby didn’t have kissing experience prior to meeting you, what makes you think he has any sexual experience?

He doubts masterbation counts. Fuck, he has alot of porn back at his main hideout- he has needs but no one to release them on. Sure- he's a proxy and there have been many female victims- but the thought of forcing himself on someone makes him sick- despite his twisted sense of morality.

Though, he is a bit of a voyeur if you're really asking. He stalks his victims, sometimes those victims will be busy knocking boots with one another- and you. 

He has tried to wipe that night from his mind- you were in the privacy of your bedroom, your curtains were closed but he was able to see all your actions through the crack of your curtain. He wanted to touch you down there as well and after a while of dating, you believed you were ready.

You told Toby to come over and when he was on his way, you got ready. You had a previous hunch he had seen you changing and massaging your sweet spot- although you had dealt with enough stalker business- the thought of Toby watching you? You would lie, it turned you on.

Imagine Toby’s face when he comes into your home and finds you on your bed, black lacy panties and bra, and when he stood there, you told him to stay. Spreading your legs, your fingers tracing your pussy through the thin silk of your underwear. You could hear his breath hitch before you snuck your fingers inside, playing with your clit as you stuck your fingers inside your heated walls.

Toby looked like a man in the desert, thirsty for water while you slipped a tit out of your bra, it pebbled at the cold air as you gave it a slight pinch, making your core tighten as you repeated a single word.

“Toby….Toby….oh Toby!”

You made him absolutely feral, he practically lunged at you, ripping your bra off your body as you went for your tits.

Toby loves your tits, if there were ever a perfect stress toy, if it would be them, they just fit so snuggly in his hands, he loves seeing the reactions you make as he pinches at your nipples, bites them, flicks at them with his tongue.

This boy has a lot of pent up energy, a lot of pent up libido, you were both each others’ first and you know how they say the first is the worst?  That couldn’t have been any more false. Toby had you dripping before sinking his cock inside you. Not only did you get super worked up after he bullied your titties- he wanted to taste your cunt. He always wondered what pussy tastes like.- he even said this to you as he pulled your hips up, his arms wrapped around your torso before going tongue first. He had your legs suspended in the air with the way he helped you and there was no escaping his grip. He was a man on a mission, his tongue wiggling around in your cunny like an alien object while you grabbed at your sheets.

Toby’s penis is a wonderful size and shape, six inches- a good width that curved upward, uncircumcised of course. Toby never thought much of his penis- he hated looking at it- there was a time where after gym class, the boys in the locker room stole his gym clothes and ripped his towel off him- he was a kid a time and he remember their jeers clearly- making fun of the size of his dick while some took photos. ((They’re dead now.))

He hesitated for a bit but when he finally started fucking you, he swore he saw stars in your eyes. “Yes Toby! Oh- fuck! Toby- you’re filling me up so good! Give me more Toby- please!”

He gained back a confidence he didn’t realise he had or needed.

Your first time was vanilla, just him on top of you while he fucked his cock back into your cunny over and over again as tears weld up in your eyes from the sheer fullness of him

With it, came a sort of dominance he displayed over you- he loved seeking you weak from pleasure- he loved your submission, the control he had over you.

“You're mine, do you understand… this little pussy belongs to me.” He would snarl in your ear while fingering your pussy. He can be quite mean, he likes to call you his slut while making you masterbate in front of him- you recently invested in a vibrator and you’ll sit there, legs spread and cum as many times as he wants- whether you're over stimulated or not, even go as far as to slap that pussy after its all red, swollen and dripping with yours and his spent.

When he comes to your home and you're doing ordinary things, you're the one incharge, he’s the one who can’t put a foot wrong, but in the bedroom, he’s in charge and you have to watch yourself. Speaking of submission, he loves seeing you tied up, he loves your tiny body against his. He’ll fuck you everywhere he can, on the bed, against the wall, on the floor, on the sick counter, in your shower. He even once got you outside of the grass where he fucked you into the dirt.

But he’s not entirely ruthless, he’ll run you a bath while you hydrate yourself with some water. Because of his CIPA, he doesn’t really feel hot or cold so one time, afterwards, he tried to put you in a bath- you screamed your head off because the water was too hot- but he’s gotten better at evening out the temperature. He’ll sit with you in the bath and wash your hair while your relax against his chest

He’ll change your sheets and dress you up in airy pajamas before tucking both himself and you into bed, big spooning you with his head buried in your neck.

“You're my home now (Y/n).... so please…. Don’t ever leave me.”

[nickythehickey]

*emcee voice* hello sfth fandom, by the request of myself and literally four people (hi @not-an-idiot @very-confused-alpaca @chaostributary97 @bbatcat), i give you

my best attempt at a list of disability representation in the sfthverse

*for the purposes of the list, "disability" includes physical/mental/developmental disabilities, neurodivergence, chronic illnesses, and mental health conditions

*i went through and added as many as i could think of but easily could've missed some. also i can't get the patreon rn so there's no patreon exclusive characters, sorry. if you know of some more feel free to reply/reblog and i'll add them!

canon (either explicit or heavily implied)

bubba (inside the mysterious cube) is stated to be an amputee with prosthetic legs

peter steven (the milkman) is stated to have adhd; granted its a throwaway line but i think it's true. since adhd has a large genetic component, that implies that either janet or david or both likely also has it- my money's on david since peter seems to mostly take after him

post mortem, L (the creak in the attic) is mute and uses mime/sign language and possession as forms of aac

donnie (the detective vs. the christmas tree bandits), my personal blorbo, is explicitly stated to have adhd and a seizure disorder- likely photosensitive epilepsy based on the mentions of the lights in the strip club. "i was never good with numbers" could be interpreted as dyscalculia as well. frankie may also have adhd bc again genetics, but if he does he can mask like a motherfucker

chip (the cardboard stegosaurus) has an unspecified seizure disorder (although i can't find one that turns you french), and while she isn't present, we learn that his mother marie-claire was suicidal

queen of representation that she is, amanda (clarissa's diy wedding) is all but confirmed to have prosopagnosia, or face blindness

according to divorces and teddy bears, the entire north pole elf population has adhd. congrats on the diagnosis luke i mean snowdrop

"that one gas station man" as @doodle-ratz called him (the pilot's final flight) is blind

mrs jeffery (the milkman) was blind at the beginning of the scene, they ended up not going with that but she probably does still have poor vision

the bartender (the hare who wore a sweater) slut dropped so hard his knees exploded, and that's now a sentence i've said on the internet. im.... not sure what to count this as tbh, but as a person with vague undiagnosed joint fuckery myself, he makes the list regardless

they don't like... SAY IT say it, but john hobson (the creak in the attic) with the whole "thunderstorm killed my parents" thing probably has ptsd. like yall see it too right

based on body language, granddad (wine under the bridge) appears to use a walker, suggesting mobility issues

headcanons (still implied like at least a little bit but mostly up to interpretation, this is mine)

*(this one's messy, its more me sensing vibes than anything else, there's almost definitely some projection in there, honestly you can disregard it if you want. spoilers its mostly autism bc that's me)

frankie (the bard with a scar) says that he can't run fast, maybe implying mobility issues? i like to think so

i don't think their ages are ever established so i may be completely off base and they're just meant to be children, but jimmy (toby's secret pocket) and jeffery (party quirks) are both autistic teenagers/young adults to me. jeffrey specifically bc he reminds me immensely of how i acted the first and only time i threw a party

i get... a vibe. from titch (the unrelenting aubergine). im not sure what it is, but its there

fellow autistic people yk how there's this weird kinda split that happens where when you're a kid people think you're mature for your age but then once you're older people think you're immature? yeah johnny and janae (the neighbor's under the bed) are the extreme incarnation of that dichotomy

someone in the comments of ballet on the battlefield pointed out alexa stimming after she befriends janusz and i love that so im saying she's some flavor of neurodivergent

troll-son (wine under the bridge) probably has some kinda allegory for something idk

because of the way i visualize character designs for sfth, pretty much any character luke played while wearing glasses (like andrew (all eyes on nigel) or fullset o'hands) also wears glasses. im not gonna list them all just know they're included

i've been working on this list for seven hours. i feel like sysiphus (thats a very smart reference). im going to bed

EDIT: if you're seeing this now there's an update in the reblogs!

[vanyatas]

TICCI TOBY HCS

GENERAL HCS:

Midwest emo.

But in a more silly way if you feel me chat

6’0.

Very sweet, He’s still a bit younger than the rest of the creeps so i still feel like he has a bit of joy and whimsy

Gash on his cheek from chewing through it.

Cannibalistic tendencies.

Soft, brown, messy hair, goes down to his neck but keeps it medium length on the top.

Operator mark on his ribs.

Car seat headrest(LMFAOOO), Angels and Airwaves, Weezer, Ptv, Modern Baseball, American Football, Sorority Noise, Origami Angel, Title Fight, Mom Jeans, No Pressure enjoyer.

Chews on his hands and finger tips

Wears leather gloves to avoid this

Def has BPD

Even if he’s sweet, because he has this ^ his mood can be set off immediately.

Piercings. Double eyebrow and a septum, ears as well.

Gets them done to see if he likes them, Will probably take them out a second later if he thinks it doesn’t look right.

BROWN EYESSS PLSS DO YALL FEEL ME!! I see him having very dark brown ones.

Skinnier, But by god does he have muscles regardless!! nothing too toned, but he’s definitely built from well. being a killer and having to chase and do crazy shit.

Stutters yes.

Autistic, PTSD, Tourette’s, Tics, CIPA, and Schizophrenia!! Keeping it 90% og still.

Also attention starved, It gets to him severely that Masky is The Operators favorite.

They’re still friends. Along with Jeff, EJ, BEN and Hoodie.

Hoodie and him don’t talk a lot.

ROMANTIC HCS:

A little awkward.

After all Clockwork was his first girlfriend.

They ended on good terms but I digress.

Even if he’s anxious and awkward, He is trying his best to try to flirt and show he likes you.

It might fail 50% of the time and he just apologizes and fast walks away to scream at himself for fucking it up.

Mid-Dating he might be a little fucking scared to even kiss you.

Will look at u with his autistic eyes until he either just walk away with a hot face or if you take the initiative to kiss him first.

Probably feel melt and blow up if you kiss him without him asking or staring.

Any compliments will make him stim I’d like to think.

Get excited to tell you about anything.

If you reciprocate, a burst of ‘i love you so much’ and more rants about the things he likes.

Once he’s settled in enough he will be at your door every night to sleep with you.

Cuddles omg, the amount of physical affection you will receive once he’s comfortable enough is crazy.

Plays with your hair, scratches at your scalp.

MAKES A MIXTAPE FOR YOU.

He would love to do the trend where you buy nail polish of each others eye color n paint it on your nails, or buy gemstones to make bracelets.

Might carve your initials into the wood of his hatchets when you guys are together for while.

Cups your face before he kisses you.

WILL burrow his face into any part of you.

Show him new music and he will listen to it everyday to memorize it for you.

can i go to ellie and mason. HOUSE 💜

also it might be obvious i have a favorite.. 100% listened to don’t you dare forget the sun writing this.

HUGEEE creds to bae (/plat) @kumcore !!

[dailyfloweys]

Flowey Analysis from a fellow flower 🌼

Happy National Siblings Day! for April 10th, I'm posting something a bit different than my usual daily flowey art. I'll be talking a bit about Flowey's character and comparing the nuances of his character with my personal experiences.

talk of PTSD and sibling death ahead:

Day 28 | I see you

Before I dive into the meat and potatoes of his grief I just want to add how I view flowey in terms of how he Feels Emotions because I forgot that not everyone is on the same page:

-him lacking a soul to feel compassion or most of his own feelings (besides anger and fear) feels very representative of how the brain will protect itsself after experiencing extreme stress situations like the shit he went through… There will be a wall that feels impenetrable between you and your emotions and it takes sooo much to find your way over that wall. and when you get over it its just one time and you wont really remember how to get back over that wall. yeah.. It gets a little easier each time at least.. And people who love you can help make it easier too ❤️

-him being immortal but getting reincarnated before reaching adulthood… feels very representative of how PTSD works on the brain and how ultimately it will just take Much longer before your brain can fully mature.. He needs some more time to live! Him further traumatizing himself by going through constant resets is not living!!

Ok. Now lets start the post:

He just misses his best friend. He misses the only one that understands him. He just wants to talk to them one more time. He doesn't understand why hes alive or why he was left behind. It's a weird feeling to be alive and be forced to live through so many years without that once-familiar company. The longer you go on without them, the harder memories with them are to recall. You start to fixate on a set few that you feel are most important, and soon it becomes your mantra. It starts getting harder to recall what their face looks like, but you remember when you look in a mirror. (I talked about this before on my sideblog too)

It being almost 6 years now since my brother passed away, this has been the culmination of how I've felt throughout the years. Maybe it wasn't intentional of Toby Fox to have Floweys simple smile resemble Charas smile, but I can't help but see it that way. You may not notice the similarities you have to your sibling at first, but once they pass on, those features really start to shine. In Floweys case, he didn't start to resemble chara until after losing them. It can certainly feel this way-- that the features just sort of appear out of nowhere. Parts of you that you ignored are now more apparant than ever.

Flowey/Asriel talking about how Chara is the only person that understands him is something I get more than anything. The sibling you lived and grew with would absolutely understand you more than anyone else... They know what your home life is like, what you get for dinner, secrets you dont tell anyone... Regardless of how close you feel with your sibling, they know you better than anyone else.

Losing someone that you have this kind of relationship with can very easily cause your whole world to fall apart in front of you, and you're left to pick up the pieces. It's usually preferred that you have others in your life to help you with this process, but if you don't... It could be hard to heal. Not only that, but it could be easier to hurt a lot more than you should in the grieving process.

Isolated and alone, there isn't much to do besides hope for something better than this. Mom or Dad couldn't fix me, so maybe... maybe They can. They'll come back for me. They know I can't live without them, right?

For some time, I wanted to believe this. It was so scary being in a world without my sibling. Hes the one that protected me from those that hurt us, and with him gone, I'd be vulnerable. For many months, I'd have the same dream, night after night...

They show up in your dreams, telling you that they're alright. They're not dead! It was just a lie someone made up. You feel their warm embrace. And then, you wake up. For a second, you still believe that its true--They really didn't die. But, then... You lie there in bed for just a bit longer. You realize the truth. You realize you have to live through today, tomorrow, next week, next month, next year, next decade, and next century without them from now on. You get up.

For Flowey's case, he never fully made peace with Chara's passing until Frisk comes along. He needed someone to pull him out of the constant trauma he was inflicting upon himself (his power to reset) and ... a bit of kindness and patience... to finally move forward. To finally get to live life again, day by day.

Before Frisk, however, all he had was himself. With his best friend seemingly not coming back, and his family unable to help him ...

He simply can't continue. If it wasn't for the fact that he came back to life by being combined with concentrations of Determination, the grief he felt upon being left behind would've caused him to be gone again for good. It makes so much sense to me that his parents couldn't help him in this state. They don't understand how different the grief of losing a sibling is from losing a child. Both hurt deeply and last a lifetime, but the loss of a sibling is a loss of someone who you've known your whole life. its the loss of someone who was growing up with you.

So, of course, since he found out he can't die AND that he can reset the timeline whenever he wants to... He decided to start playing god to cope. He can't have his body, soul, or best friend, so... this is his compromise for some sort of control. As the years DONT go by, and he continues to reset the timeline for the fun of it, he only continues to get worse... And theres no one there to help him. Of course someone does come around to finally help him, but its been so many years already. It's horrible he had to wait so long to finally move on and live again.

Cuz of this, I like to think frisk remains his friend and he starts to find himself again after everything that happened. He needs gentle people in his life to let him heal however he needs to. And, I feel out of everyone, he could only ever talk about the trauma he went through to frisk... No one else would understand. Like literally. they'd go "What the fuck are you Talking about". except maybe sans. But it wouldn't be a good idea to open up to sans about that kind of trauma 9_9;

Frisk may not be able to fully understand (If we are going off the premise that Chara is aware of all the Resets and Not Frisk) but Flowey doesn't need someone to fully understand...just someone to talk to and have a shoulder to lean on.

Okay I'm done speaking my stuff heres art I made last September with a cool background I drew up recently on it:

This drawing is rather personal to me because this drawings actually a memory I have of me and my brother in the last years we shared where we Didn't have to worry about us being hurt anymore. We were playing each others favorite games at the time.

I decided to post this on this day because:

A. April 10th is National Siblings Day!

B. the day after today, April 11th, is the day my brother died. Once a year, I like to do something cathartic for myself. Whether I'm just getting bottled up feelings out of me or I'm letting myself understand where I am with my grief, I like to always try and do something like this to remember my brother. Hes the only one that could understand what I went through and how hard it was to get here.

C. In general, I feel its important to post this because I know personally how hard it is to write about things like this. There have been many times where I've tried writing or drawing about my PTSD and, even though I didn't even write the first word or draw the first line, All of my days energy would get zapped out of my system just thinking about it. Its been long enough now that I can write as much as this post and still feel okay! So if anyone out there reading this is in the same boat, just know that healing truly does take time. Sometimes it also takes a certain person, or a certain phrase. Be patient, take care of yourself, and appreciate the ones around you while theyre still here.

Sticking this here because I didn't have any reason to include this in the main post But the 9 year anniversary letter Asriel wrote about Chara really messed me up </3 for many reasons, but also because my brothers favorite number is also 9... ❤️🤝🌼

[thehorrorsoftheblackbunnymask]

Paid Internship (Part 2)(Prison AU)

Author's Note: This is a Prison AU that the viewers of my blog seem to be pretty fond of. The main focuses for the romance parts will differ depending on the part. The reader is gender neutral and uses She/He stuff, but sometimes depending on what's going on I'll use stuff like Tits. Also, Sully will be in the fic, but I won't use his name. Pay attention to how Liu talks.

Author's Note 2: If you wanna be tagged for part three, leave a comment, or reblog.

Series Summary: Welcome to your paid internship at Roosevelt Federal Prison. After being seen for your potential and skills by your instructor at the Academy, he decided to give you opportunity of working in the US' most dangerous prison despite the disapproval and rejection from the higher ups. However, due to miscommunication and faulty paperwork, you're gonna up working with some of America's most danger serial killers for the semester.

Warnings: Implied Non-con, Murder, Lying, Deception, Descriptions of crimes, Perversion, Manipulation, Gaslighting, Gore, Sadism, Violence, Implied Nudity, Mocking, Humilation, Threats, Mood Swings, PTSD, Alcohol, Mental Illness, Dealings, Attempted Murder, Cursing, Sleep Deprived Workers, Stress, Agression, and More. This AU is not for the faint of heart.

Links: {Part 1} {Masterlist} {Series Concept}

"Oh god, what would Gibbons think of me if he saw me doing this," You said, rubbing you eyes as you stood infront of the door separating you from the inmates.

Liu didn't even tell you what Jeff stole from him, for all you know this could be some sick set up to get you hurt. However, you were slowly growing desperate. Toby's implication that Abbie Grace was still alive was filling you up with concern, she could be alive and out there, terrified, alone, probably hurt. Liu promised to tell you what he knew about Abbie if you gave him whatever Jeff stole.

Getting into solitary wasn't going to be easy. When you were first brought in, you saw a large line of men running into the ward. Based on this, your best assumption was that mostly security personnel were allowed in the ward, and if officers were let in, it was most likely with some kind of clearance. (A clearance you didn't have.)

"Ok Y/N, think, think. What are the pros of doing this... you get info from Liu, but he's already on your roster, meaning you'll be interviewing him some time down the road. But, he seems stubborn, so he won't tell me anything easily. You get to explore solitary! But, there's an extremely high risk that you'll get caught, expelled from the academy, fired from your internship, and most likely get charges placed against you."

You almost took back the deal. Almost.

"But if you don't fuck up, if you do everything right, if you solve this case, you'll be legend. You'll...get praise from Gibbons, from mom, from...," You paused, looking up with a shine in your eyes. "From...dad. I'm doing this."

Walking away from the inmates quarters, you made your way back to the little office Mandel assigned you. Closing the door as you entered, you looked at the little map posted up against the wall, looking for any security storage rooms.

Your plan may seem crazy, but it could work. Your plan was to somehow sneak into a security room, put on a uniform, grab some gear, find a keycard, and get into solitary. You'd be lucky if you even found the security room. The map was hard to understand, nothing was written in words, instead they used symbols as labels for rooms. You assumed that the orange coat for a symbol for some kind of inmate section.

"What would a symbol for the security room look like?" You asked yourself as you looked at the map.

Suddenly, you flinched at the sound of knocking coming from your door.

"INTERN! YOU IN THERE?" A masculine voice yelled from the other side.

Taking a deep breath, you made your way to the door. You couldn't but admit that you were a little on edge. What if they caught you sneaking into the inmate quarters through the cameras (But now do you think about it, where there any cameras to begin with?). That idea sent you into a panic, but you did your best to keep a neutral composure.

Opening the door, you were greeted by a large man. If you had the guess, he was probably was around 6'3, 6'4. You didn't take note of his appearance however, because you were more distracted by the large gun in his hand, and the large word "SECURITY" written on his chest.

"Um, can I help you?"

"Do you have a TV in here? We're checking all offices and rooms."

"...Yeah, why you ask?"

Without saying another word, the man pushed you to the side and grabbed the large TV from the corner.

"Hey! Dude! I need that," You stated, Marching towards the man as he lifted up the TV.

"Don't know if you got the news, intern, but any technology is strictly forbidden on prison grounds."

"...A prison...with no tech? How the hell is this legal, hell, how is this safe?"

The guard didn't say another word, walking off with the TV as you chased after him.

"If it's not allowed, why did I get it in the first place, hm?"

"From some dumbass I bet. Now, leave me alone; I have more bullshit I gotta deal with for the night."

Giving up on trying to get information from the security guard, you watched as he walked off into the distance. But, what he failed to notice was the fact that you were able to steal his keycard from his pocket. One of you cousins was a notorious thief back where you grew up, and he taught you a thing or two about pickpocketing.

"Never knew that dumbass' methods would work," You joked to yourself before quickly making your way to your office.

Opening the door, you took one last look at the map. After a few seconds of quick skimming, you saw the security room wasn't too far from the inmates quarters. It was a few doors down from the entrance to solitary, a pretty smart and convenient spot to hold the room.

Doing a quick check of your surroundings, you locked the door to your office and casually made your way to the security desk. You learned from when you snuck into the inmates' quarters. Even though you were an intern, looking scared and nervous drew attention, making you look suspicious, but if you kept a casual and calm expression, no one would suspect a thing!

"Just stay calm. Stay. Calm," You mumbled to yourself as you used the stolen keycard to open the door leading to the office area you saw when you first walked into the pasta section of the prison.

Taking a left, you did another skim of your surroundings before opening the security door and quietly making your way in. However, the first thing you were met with was the strong smell of sweat and iron.

"Shit...it smells like a high school locker room," You groaned as you pinched your nose. "Jesus...never heard of deodorant."

The security room was set up like a locker room. A few random uniforms were hanged against the wall with various numbers indicating their sizes placed above them. Some were hanged neatly, while others looked like they were placed in a rush. On the opposite side of the room, locked up in a glass container, where various guns, cuffs, shields, and batons. Even though the weapons were placed behind, hopefully, bullet proof glass, you couldn't help but feel like the glass wasn't going to prevent anything from being stolen. One thing you didn't notice at first was how dim the lighting in the room was. It wasn't so dark you couldn't see, but it was dark enough for some things to be barley noticeable. The last thing you cared enough to note was on the wall directly infront of you, a few lockers had their locks still open, meaning either someone was going to be back soon to get something, or someone forgot to close it, either way, you didn't want to stay long enough to find out.

Grabbing the uniform that looked like it would fit you best, you quickly changed into the security uniform. Looking at yourself in the mirror, the uniform was practically riot gear. Using the keycard to open the glass, you grabbed one of the guns from off the wall.

Walking out of the room, you took a deep breath before quickly making your way to solitary.

Opening the door, you instantly felt a shift in the atmosphere. Outside of solitary, there was always some kind of noise. May it be the sound of people walking, the noise the lights made, or just random white noise, there was always something. But here, here it was dead quiet, so quiet you could hear a pin drop. For some reason, you felt terrified to even make a single noise, to take a single step, hell, to even take a single breath. You felt regret hit you like a bus, you could feel your body begging you to go back, to take off the uniform, to figure out Abby'a case without Liu's advice, to do anything but fucking continue in solitary, but the idea of getting praise from Gibbons for solving such a hard cause, the idea of making your parents proud, the idea to prove to everyone at the Academy that you were capable of handling this internship blinded you from your body's judgment. So, as if your body went on autopilot, you started your journey down the halls.

The sound of the heavy boots of the uniform echoed throughout the hallway. Solitary was very bright and clean, walls perfectly white, and the lights lacked the ugly yellow tint the other parts of the prison had. It was such a breath of fresh air compared to the rest of the prison. Not only that, but you haven't seen a single prisoner yet. All the rooms you walked past were either empty or locked, none of them had a single sign of life in there. So, it left you wondering, was anyone even supervising the prisoners? None of the rooms were labeled, none of them. No signs telling you were to go, nothing. So, if someone found you wondering around like a duckling without its mother, you'd be caught red handed.

"Hey! You!"

Flinching at the loud and sudden noise, you slowly turned around as you saw a woman dressed as a nurse power walking towards you.

"What are you doing here? You're supposed to dealing with Jeffery."

"Jeffery?"

"Yes! Ever since he's came back from his interview with that intern he's been out of control. He bit a chunk out of Elisa's arm when she tried to give him his medication. And his behavior starting to get...Ben relied up, and we can't have that! I refuse to deal with that fucking freak again."

"Oh shit... Where's Jeffery right now?"

"In his room left of here, just follow the noise."

"Ok."

"Thanks. Now I have to deal with a few injured prisoners in the normal section, have Goosemen radio me if things get bad."

As the nurse walked off, or more so ran off, you quickly took a left and followed the faint noise of screams and laughter.

What you saw made a chill go down your spine.

Jeff was running around his room with three security personnel chasing him as a nurse yelled for Jeff to calm down. Unlike earlier, Jeff's mouth was bleeding, his shirt tied around his waist as he ran around, revealing the fresh scratches all around his arm and chest, and for a quick second, you saw the flash of something shiny on his back.

"Jeffery! Please sit down and take you medicine! Afterwards you'll be left alone for the night, ok!?" The nurse yelled as she waved a bottle a pill in the air. "We've been at this for hours...tasers don't work, pepper spray don't work, and we can't shoot him nor use fear..."

"Is this common?" You asked, catching the nurse's attention.

"When he first got here it was, but he hasn't acted like this in years. Even when he didn't take his medicine, he wouldn't act like this."

"Maybe he's getting bored," A guard commented, causing the nurse to nod her head in consideration.

"Maybe, or maybe it was that intern. I don't know what happened when they spoke, but maybe they said something to cause him to act like this," The nurse said, a look of annoyance written on her face.

The nurse's statement made your blood run cold. After all the events that happened in the past few hours, you were starting to accept the fact you weren't the most liked by the staff.

"What did I even do?" You thought, a look of hurt and confusion in your eyes. "They don't even know what I look like!"

"I'm going to talk to Mandel about getting them off this case, or even out of this section in general. I don't know what Gibbons sees in them, but things where running as smoothly as they can run until they showed up, and now all the prisoners are acting up."

"Fresh meat," The guard added, causing the nurse to chuckle.

"Fresh meat in deed, sharks they are."

"Hey, it's their first day, give the kid some slack. Once the prisoners get used to their presence they'll simmer down," You said, shifting your gaze over to the various cells in the hallway.

"I hope you're right."

As you looked at the various cells, one cell in particular stood out. It was at the very end of the hallway, the light right above it flickering rapidly. Not only was it locked with a different kind of door, instead having the ones with a simple hole with a few metal bars to peek through and a small hole to slide food in, the entire thing was closed, no one could peek in or out. It was also kept shut with a wheel, and alongside the wheel was a bunch of chains, each tie holding a different lock. Whatever the hell was in there, nobody wanted it getting out.

Suddenly, the sound of a large thump drew your attention away from the door. Lying down on the floor, Jeff was being pinned down by the three guards that were chasing him previously.

"Ugh...I'm tired," Jeff said as he let out a yawn.

Taking out the knife from the back of Jeff's waistband, one of the guards slide it over to the guard you were talking to prior, who then placed it in a zip lock bag.

"OK Jeff, just take these and we'll be done," The nurse said softly, trying her best to hide her agitation.

Based on the nurse's appearance, she was exhausted, not only physically, but mentally as well. Her eyes had dark purple bags, her hair was a mess, and her uniform as practically in shambles.

"Fine," Jeff mumbled before swallowing the two pills.

"Finally," The nurse said under her breath. "OK boys, get out."

As everyone cleared out the room, you made sure to be the very last person to leave. Once everyone turned the corner, you quickly made your way back to Jeff's cell. Peeking through the small section of bars, you watched as Jeff spat out the pills he just "swallowed."

"Airheaded bitch," Jeff joked as he let out a chuckle.

"Jeff," You whisper-yelled, causing Jeff to turn his head.

"Awww, you missed me," Jeff teased before making his ways to the bars.

"No. You got something of Liu's, give it."

"Took him long enough."

"Huh?"

"I took that idiot's scarf a week ago and now he wants it back? Is he slow?"

Walking over to his bed, Jeff lifted up the mattress and pulled out a black and grey scarf.

"Here, and tell him that he owes me big time," Jeff said before hitting the door two times, causing the sound to echo throughout the halls.

"Ok."

As you walked off, you heard Jeff burst into laughter.

"How crazy is he?" You thought.

Howver, you froze in your tracks at the sound of chains hitting the floor. Turning around ever so slowly, you saw a pile of chains and locks sitting infront of the door at the end of the hall.

You knew not to go knew it, your brain was sending you all the alarms.

"Leave it be," "Go back," "It has nothing to do with you."

Those words rung in your head over and over again, but your body started to move on its own. It was as if the door had a magnetic field to it that caused you to get closer and closer, your mind was begging for you to go back, but your body was consumed with curiosity.

Every day you wish you never took a step near that fucking door.

Picking up the chains, you examined the material. Pretty standard chains, amazing quality, but still standard.

As you looked up at the door, you felt your mind begin to fog up. As if you were a puppet on strings, your hands reached towards the wheel, and before you could process what was happening, the door was already open.

There was a single light bulb in the room, dangling from the ceiling. As the light bulb flashed, you could make out the figure of someone tied to a chair. However, the moment your body took a step into the room, closing the door behind you, the lights stilled, and you could control your body once more.

"What...?" You said, turning behind you.

Sitting in the chair was a man, couldn't be older than 25. His head was facing the floor, his blonde hair hiding his features, but it couldn't hide his pointed ears. Heavy chains were keeping him bound to the chair. There was no bed, no sink, no toilet, no trays, nothing. The room was completely bare, the only things taking up space was you, the chair, and him.

As if he could sense your fear, the man slowly lifted his head, his head remaining tilted to side as he looked at you. His bright green eyes bored into your soul. The chill that went down your spine was indescribable. And that smile. It was something you could never forget. The dilated pupils, his wide, sinister smile, and the crazed look on his face. It still gives you nightmares.

"What...are you."

You didn't even think about your words. Whoever he was, he wasn't human.

CRACK!

You flinched as the sound of chains hit the floor once more. He broke off his chains.

Gibbons never trained you for a situation like this, saying that they would teach you once you got a job in a prison. So, all you could do was stare, pushing yourself as far back against the wall as you could.

As he made his way towards you, you felt your life flash before your eyes. The only thing you could think about was never being able to show your parents your certificate from the academy, how they'd never see you walk across the stage, and the sight of them seeing you body in a casket.

As he stared down at you, all you could do was cry. But then, all you heard was...

Laughter?

Looking up, all you saw was him throwing his head back in laughter, clapping his hands as he did.

"YOU SHOULD SEE YOUR FACE!" The man yelled as he sat down in front of you, holding his stomach.

All fear you had was traded with confusion.

"...What?"

"You're, you're that intern, right?"

"Uh, no?"

"Liar," The man said before booking your nose. "You're hot for an intern."

"..."

Standing up, the man reached his hand out towards you. "Name's Ben."

You swore you had heard that name before, but you couldn't place your hands on where.

Taking his hand, Ben pulled you up with a suprising amount of strength. Due to the how hard he pulled you, you ended up stumbling into his arms, causing his to wrap his arms around your waist.

You knew better than to think this, but you couldn't ignore how attractive, or more so how cute he was. Despite being in prison, his hair was relatively neat, and his smile and freckles were adorable.

If only you knew...

"I, uh... I didn't mean to come in here."

"I know!"

"...How?"

"You got a phone in your, left, no, right back pocket, along with a keycard that you stole," Ben said before leaning in, a teasing but flirtous look in his eyes, "Pretty illegal Little Miss/Mr. Intern."

Oh my god you could die right now. You were never one to fall so easily for someone's advances, but the way he spoke, the look in his eyes, and the way his arms wrapped around your waist made you melt.

"Can I see your phone?"

"O-Ok."

You didn't even think twice.

What was he doing to you? You were always reasonable, you rarely allowed yourself to fall into such emotions.

It didn't matter how he made you feel or react, he's a criminal, and if his room was this this locked up, that meant he was dangerous from the rest. Despite how fogged up your mind was, that was the one thing that you could think straightly about.

While you were distracted by your conflicting emotions, Ben was quickly slipped your phone into the pockets of his pants.

"Why don't we take this off," Ben said before pulling the helmet off your head.

Now that he had a good look at your face, Ben could feel his smile only growing wider. Thoughts raced through his head as he looked at you.

Disgusting.

Suddenly, he kissed you. You wanted to push him away, tell him that you couldn't put this opportunity at risk, but you just couldn't. Instead, you leaned into it, your body moving on its own.

"No, no we can't...I can't lose this," You said as you pulled away from the kiss.

"No one's going go find out " Ben responded, pulling you closer. "No one comes in here anyways."

You shouldn't believe his words, he's a criminal, you know better. Don't let every Gibbons taught you be all for nothing.

"...ok."

As Ben kissed you again, much rougher this time, you felt your mind go blank. As his tongue slipped into your mouth, his hands taking off the guard uniform, your hands made their way under his shirt.

Stop. Stop now. Go back. Leave.

The two of you then sunk to the floor, you straddling his hips as he gripped your hair.

As his hands pulled down your pants, you felt as if none of this mattered. The internship you worked months to get. It just, didn't matter anymore. Your mind was blank.

The room then went black, the only thing you could see was his eyes. All you could feel was his hands roaming your body touching every last bit of you. All you could remember was you straddling his lap, one of his hands holding your arms back as his other gripped your hair, forcing you into a kiss. You felt everything. And it all felt sooooo...painfully good.

"M-Mh fuck baby~ I ain't ever gonna stop..."

-------------------------------------------------------------

You never hated yourself more.

The entire event was a blur. Your mind and body weren't even on the same page, hell, they weren't even reading the same book. You didn't even feel like yourself during the whole endevour, it felt as if someone was wearing your skin, acting as you while you watched from the outside.

You had the power to stop it, you were an officer afterall. But the look he gave you, the touches, the words of reassurance, it was all intoxicating and so painfully mind numbing.

Did you even want it? You didn't even know. Moments before, when you felt in control of yourself, all you could feel was fear. He wasn't safe, he wanted to hurt you, but why didn't he? You were right there.

You didn't want to see him again, not at all. He was fucking with your head. You can't trust him, but anytime he's around it's as if all logic and sense leaves your body. You were completely at his will and he barely had to try.

But, something about him made him addicting. The way he's making you feel isn't normal, the way you so blindly opened the door wasn't normal, the patchy memories weren't normal. HE WASN'T NORMAL. He's doing this to you, but how?

"Y/N!"

Shooting up, you were no longer in solitary, but instead you were back in your office. Liu's scarf was placed neatly on you lap, and on your desk was you phone.

Standing at the desk was a very tired, but concerned Mandel.

"Ma'am?"

"I came in to check on you two hours ago, but you weren't here. Came back an hour ago, still not here. Came back five minutes ago, still not here. But when I come back now, FAST ASLEEP. Where. Were. You."

"...I was...I... I was trying to get my TV back from a guard..."

"One, for two hours? And two, who gave you one to begin with?"

"Um...Yeah, and I don't know..." "...Ugh...Wait, why the hell do you have a phone?" "Why wouldn't I?"

"Our prison doesn't allow tech due to a certain inmate."

"Why?" You asked, your blood going cold.

"He's able to control any kind of technology in a twenty-five mile radius. He's able to travel from tech to tech, he's one of our nonhuman inmates."

"What is he?"

Mandel looked around in the hallway before fully entering the room.

"We're not allowed to talk about him...but I'll tell you," Mandel said before taking a seat in front of you. "I won't say names, but he's a ghost. He was sacraficed by a cult, and came back as a vengeful spirt. He died relatively young based off what he told us, but he seems to be aging even as ghost. The longer we keep him, the harder it is to keep him under control. Not only that, but he's getting stronger too."

"...Will I be interacting with him at all?"

"What?! No! Are you crazy? You may be handling the Abbie Grace case, but he is far too dangerous for you. He's already on death row, Y/N, have you noticed that no one else is despite their crimes? I want you to focus on this case and nothing else. I don't want you interacting with inmates outside of the ones I assign you," Mandel said before leaning into your face, her eyes glaring into yours. "And I'll know if you do."

"...Y-Yes ma'am."

Picking up a file on the table, Mandel skimmed through the folder before speaking to you. "How did Toby's interview go?"

"Ma'am, have any of you guys thought of the possibility that Abbie still might be alive?"

Mandel's posture immediately straightened as she looked up at you, the atmosphere of the room changing into a more serious tone. Lowering the file, Mandel spoke, "What happened?"

"Getting Tobias to talk was a challenge. He kept teasing and refused to corporate. I asked him a few questions just to get a rough idea on his personality and patterns, just to get to know him better," You replied, sitting up straight as you played with the hair tie that was wrapped around your wrist. "When I bought up Jeff he finally started talking. Gibbons taught me to look into the way someone spoke, and when Tobias was talking about Abbie, he was talking about her in the present tense. When I asked him if she was dead, he said that he never said she wasn't."

Mandel's eyes widened in shock after you spoke. You neve saw Mandel so expressive due to her face being caught in constant exhaustion. "Never... We never found her body so we assumed she was dead. But, I'm not sure if we can take his word for it."

"How so?"

"He may not look like it, but Toby is a pretty good liar, anything he says we take with a grain of salt."

"Who else if involved in the case?"

"Jeff, Toby, and this Boss character from what we know."

"What if we get someone besides Toby to tell us if she's dead or not?"

"Hm... Jeff might, but his awnsers really depends on his mood."

"What about this Boss guy?"

"Here's the thing, we don't know who he is."

"What? What do you mean?"

"We've caught every pasta we know of, except for the guy they call Boss. But, there's also the possibility that the Boss isn't just one guy. Based off what we know about the proxies, one of their bosses is a man known as Slenderman, but we don't even know if he's real. He's only a legend, there's no picture of him, nor has he committed any acts himself. But, when Timothy and Brian first got here, they heavily implied that there way another boss. They didn't say any names, but that's what they implied. We also don't know if they're all working for the same boss. When Jeff calls someone the Boss, he can be talking about a completely different person than Toby," Mandel stated before hiding her face in her hands. "This case in so confusing..."

"Tell me about it," You said before looking up at Mandel. "So, what should we do?"

"Hm?"

"I mean, if Toby's right, this changes how we'll go about the case. It wouldn't be a murder case anymore but instead a missing person's."

"How we'll go about it isn't much of your concern. As you have interviews with the suspects, we're also having interviews with them as well, just to compare and contrast statements and behaviors. Keep in mind, you're still in training, and this is an internship afterall. Don't get ahead of yourself."

"I knowww, but this is such an exciting experience! I've been trusted to work with the worst criminals in the country, it's truly an honor."

"It's an honor til your working 22 hour shifts," Mandel stated bluntly before opening a redbull that she pulled out of her pockets. "I'm going to leave you to your devices."

"Is their anything you want me to do in particular?"

"Hmmm... Ask Chief Salloum for some evidence we collected on Abbie's case, I want you to look into and see if there's one, any clues on where she can be if she's still alive, and two, just look for anything you think is important. In the mean time, I'll try to get you an interview with Jeffery by the end of the week."

"OK Ma'am. Also, um, where can I find Chief Salloum?'

"Salloum is next to Banklin's Office. Salloum is leading the investigation while Banklin is handling the officers, he might have some information, but I'm not entirely sure," Mandel stated as she opened the door, "Good luck, Kiddo."

As the door closes after Mandel, you didn't even notice how long you were holding your breath for. What Mandel said about this ghost inmate really sent your mind into a frenzy. Whoever he was, they clearly wanted to keep him a secret.

"OK. Should I meet up with Liu or Salloum?" You asked yourself as you looked down at Liu's scarf.

After interacting wuth the Woods brothers, you couldn't help but notice how different they were from each other. Jeff was loud, perverted, sadistic, playful, and emotional, while Liu was more quiet and reserved, but his behavior was flipping. When you first met Liu, he was playful and painfully teasing, but when you met with him again at the cells, he was quiet and acted like he didn't want to speak with you at all. To be honest, you didn't know what was scarier, Jeff's weird unapologetic personality, or Liu's bipolar one.

"Liu."

Standing up from your desk, you wasted no time as you made your way back to the inmate quarters.

Checking the time in your phone, you noticed that it was 2AM. When you got here with Gibbons, it was around 6 or 7, and based on the waiver and contract Gibbons had you sign, you wouldn't be let out til 7AM.

As you walked towards the door of the quarters, you flinched at the sound of banging on the glass. Turning your head, you felt yourself ease up as you made eye contact with a pair of dark green eyes.

Raising up the scarf, you could feel Liu smile from beyond the glass. Liu's smile was different from everyone else's, it was soft, it was genuine.

Entering the quarters, Liu was waiting for you on the other side. Handing him the scarf, he stared at it for a bit before putting it on.

"Fucking asshole."

"Sorry it took so long, stuff came up."

Liu only glanced at you before rolling his eyes.

"This isn't even all of it," Liu said bluntly.

"What? This is all Jeff gave me. What else does he have"

"My gun."

"...oh... So uh, deals off?"

Liu didn't say another word as he grabbed your wrist, dragging you towards a cell.

"...ugh," A voice from the top bunk said.

Looking up, all you saw was the top half of Toby's body dangling from the top bunk.

"Are you drunk?" Liu asked honestly, poking at the man's face.

"Maybeeeee," Toby said before reaching out to Liu, making kissing noises as he did.

"Go to bed, Tobias," Liu said, pushing Toby's body back onto his bed. "Got any more?"

"Under the desk," Toby said as he face planted into his pillow.

Picking up the bottle, Liu sat down on the bed as he opened it. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything you know."

"Pretty vague to be honest."

"Alright then... What did you do to Abbie?"

"Even more vague."

"How?!"

"Cause I said so," Liu said before taking a sip of his alcohol, hiding his amusement as Toby giggled.

"He ain't telling you shit!" Toby yelled before bursting out into laughter.

"Shut up, Ticci," Liu said.

"Don't call me that," Toby slurred.

"Whatever."

"Enough! I don't have time for this. Where is Abbie?"

"I don't know."

"What do you mean you don't know."

"I wasn't the last one to have her."

"Last one?! How many people was she with?"

"Too vague."

This man was going to be the death of you.

Groaning into your hands, you thought about your most important question.

"Is he awake?" You asked, pointing to Toby.

Peeking over the bunk, Toby was sound asleep, snoring into his pillow as he did.

"No."

"...Is Abbie Grace alive?"

That was the first time you saw a reaction from Liu. The best you could describe his face was stumped.

"Why you ask?"

"Just awnser the question."

Liu's face went back to his numb expression before glancing upwards.

Without saying another word, Liu nodded his head. That was all the conformation you needed.

"Where is she, Liu."

"I don't know, and this isn't an interview, so I have no obligation to anwser."

"How would you feel if I told the head of this side that you have a gun in your possession?"

"One, you don't even know who that is, two, I don't have it, Jeff does, and three, how would you feel if I told Mandel that not only did you sneak into here, did a favor for a prisoner, but you also slept with one as well?" Liu said, leaning in so close to your face that your noses were just barely touching. "That's pretty punishable."

You felt your blood run cold, and he could see it on your face.

"Yeah, that's what I thought," Liu said before pushing himself against the wall. "Don't talk all big when your small, sweetie."

"How did you know..."

"Know what?"

"W-What you just said."

"I didn't say anything."

Both of you knew what he said; you could see the amusement in his eyes.

"Ooooo, what'll happen if Banklin finds out that the intern slept with dear old Benjamin...Intership go bye bye," Liu joked, waving his hand before laughing. "Don't worry, I won't tell if you don't. Secret safe."

You never thought you'd be blackmailed by a prisoner, but today was already full of surprises.

"Now, is that all, princess/princie?"

"...Yeah."

"Don't be so sad," Liu said before grabbing your face with his hands, his touch being painfully soft. "You're the only one."

You felt sick to your stomach.

Standing up as fast as you could, you quickly made your way out of the room; Liu's giggles echoing throughout the halls.

You were so dumb.

You were supposed to logical, practical, and you normally were, but ever since you stepped into to this hell hole it was as if a switch was flipped in your head. You would never be making these many mistakes. Gibbons would kill you if he found out, but you just wanted to make him proud, he's worked his ass off to get you here, you didn't want to waste it.

"What's wrong with me?"

"OW!"

You were so caught up in your train of thought that you failed to notice the man in front of you.

"Oh I, I'm sorry. Let me help you," You said, quickly bending down to help the man pick up his files.

Pushing up his glasses, the man revealed a soft smile.

"No no, it's ok. You're the intern, correct?"

"Um, yes!"

"What's your name, kiddo?" The man asked as he started to walk towards the offices.

"Y/N L/N, sir."

"Call me Salloum. I'm one of the leaders of the case we're having you look into. How is that going?"

"It's been a Rollercoaster to say the least."

Salloum pulled a key out of his pocket as he opened the door to his office. "Hm... How so?"

"I thought I had the case figured out. But, when I was interviewing Tobias he said something interesting. "

Sitting down at his desk, Salloum pulled out a small notebook as he leaned back into his chair, placing his feet on desk in the process. His tired, empty eyes stared into your young, stressed ones as he looked at you and his notebook. "I'm listening."

"He implied that Abbie Grace is still alive."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"He implied-"

"No I know I know! It's just. Fuck! How could we miss that, how could we overlook that? How could I overlook that?"

"Um, Salloum..."

"Not now kid, just. Ugh. Thank you for bring this to my attention, but I need you to leave now. There's a lot of stuff I need to get done."

"Yes, yes, of course, of course."

Once you got back to your office, all you did was sit down and think. It was all so overwhelming.

However, all you could feel were hands roaming all of your body as you zoned out entirely. Faded whispered slowly growing louder and louder as your body went limp.

You don't even know.

Such a good girl/boy you are.

You're mine now...

My perfect little whore.

You're so pathetic.

Stupid.

Dumbass.

Useless.

Useless..

Useless...

USELESS!

What did he do to you. It wasn't natural. You weren't in control. You were a puppet. He controlled you. But why? Why you? For what reason? Why does he have your phone? Should you tell Mandel? Why are you crying? Why are you shaking? Why is the world spinning?

BEN. The most dangerous inmate in the entire prison. His power: technological manipulation.

You were so stupid. Did you really forget, or did his control fog your mind? But if he did control you, how?

You couldn't take it anymore. You needed to go home for the night. Now. You needed to leave now. He couldn’t reach you if you left, right? He couldn't touch you again, he couldn’t control you again, he can't hurt you again if you leave. You'll come back tomorrow with a fresh mind and be ready for work. Yes. Yes. Just, leave.

"Miss," You said as you walked into Mandel's office.

"Yes?" Mandel responded, not looking up from her paperwork.

"I need to go home."

"What? Now? Your shift isn't even..."

As Mandel looked up at you, her words froze. You looked tired. Traumatized. Souless. You looked done.

"Kid what happen?" Mandel asked, standing up as she made your way towards you.

"I need to go home for the night."

"Look at me kid, what happened."

"...home... I want to go home," You stuttered out as you burst out into tears. "I'll be back tomorrow I promise but I need to go home."

Mandel just stared at you before nodding in approval. She got you an Uber and you were able to get a ride back to your dormitory at the Academy.

"Hey! You're back early, how'd it go?" Your roommate asked as you walked in.

However, you just walked past them, closing the door to your room as you plopped down onto your bed.

You were exhausted to say the least. You didn't even notice you fell asleep. But, for some reason you woke up in the middle of the night. You were still kind of sleepy so you weren't fully aware of your surroundings, but after some complicating of whether or not you should get out of bed, you slowly became aware to the sound of a TV.

Looking at your clock you saw that it was 4:45 AM.

"Lillian's never up this late," You grumbled as you stood up.

Your position on the bed was kind of awkward. Your upper body was laying on the bed while your legs dangled onto the floor.

"Lillian, can you turn it down please?" You asked as you rubbed your eyes, standing infront of your door as you faced the TV.

But, much to your suprise, no one was there. The TV was the only source of light in the entire room, and playing on it was just static.

"...I'm too tired for this," You mumbled before grabbing the remote.

But, the TV wouldn't turn off. No matter how many times you slammed down on the button the static would just continue.

"Are the batteries dead or something?" You asked yourself as you examined the remote.

In the back of your head you knew something was wrong. But, all you wanted was to get a normal night's rest and in the morning you could go back to work like nothing happened.

In what little time you were at the prison for you were able to deduce one thing. That place was full of secrets. Secrets that everyone knew but were never brave enough to discuss. Everyone you interacted with just held this vibe of uncertainty, anxiety, fear. It was like everyone knew that this place wasn't secure, and it didn't look like it either. What kind of prison doesn't have cameras? Or evenbetter, what kind of prison holds some of Americas most dangerous serial killers all in the same prison, in the block, knowing damn well that all of them are acquainted with one another.

If you were any other intern you would've just quit the moment this happened, but you were just any other intern. There was a reason on why there were here, a deeper reason. A reason that surpassed even government control. Maybe you were better off being a detective. Maybe you wouldn't be where you are now.

Rotting away. With Mom and Pa staring at you from the other side.

I should've quit.

"Nope, nothing wrong with the remote," You said before setting it back down. "Imma just put my headphones in."

But, as you turned around, you felt your blood run cold as you heard an all too familiar voice come from the TV.

"Baby~"

That glitchy, raunchy, mocking voice. You didn't dare turn around.

"Awwww, don't be scared."

Footsteps.

How? How the hell did he get here? How did he escape without anyone noticing?

Hands....hands. You felt his arms wrap around your waist as you leaned onto you. It felt as if he was towering over you.

"I ain't gonna hurt you," Ben said before placing something in your hand. "Just wanted to return this."

Your phone. A part of you just wanted to throw it out of your dorm window, something about it just didn't feel right, but, you stopped yourself. You didn't have the money to just buy a new one, and this was the only way you can communicate with your parents.

"How'd you get out...?" You asked.

"Oh, I'm not here. You see, I can travel a little bit of my soul to anywhere I want within my technological reach. I'm like a little hallucination while my body remains in my cell. I could come here right now if you want."

That voice. That feeling. Your world started spinning.

Not again.

"Have a little fun," Ben whispered, rubbing your arm as he talked. "We could do way more here than out there... You'll be fucking screaming."

Stop.

Your mind and body was fogged up. You couldn't think, you couldn't move.

But suddenly, you felt normal again. All of a sudden you came back to your senses and pushed him off you.

"No! I don't want any of this. Go back before I file a report that you escaped."

"What is that going to do? I can just report that you had sex with an inmate. That's pretty immoral, Y/N."

He wasn't wrong. But, Liu told you this wasn't the first time something like this happened, so maybe you'd have a chance at saving your career.

"I'm not the immoral one. Go. I don't want to see you again, you hear me?"

All he did was laugh. That glitchy, high pitched laugh...

"Loud and clear!"

You watched as Ben floated back into the TV, causing it to shut off completely.

Exhausted, you made your way back to your bed. As you laid down in your bed all you could think about was Abbie. Despite the Rollercoaster you had today all you could think about was her. She was out there somewhere. Sad, scared, alone. You had to look into it more tomorrow. You had to get a sit down with Toby and break him. Maybe you could look more into his file and figure out some weaknesses you could exploit. Out of everyone you talked to, he seemed like he'd be the most easy to crack. Jeff is too violent, trying to crack him would probably leave you with a cracked skull. Liu is way too unpredictable. Sometimes he's wacky, sometimes he's quiet, sometimes he's cold, sometimes he's compliant, sometimes he wants to just fuck with you point blank.

Plus, Toby was pretty interesting to talk to. A little manic, a little unhinged, but he had a surprising amount of life and personality to him. Charming? No. Chaotic and fun? Definitely. Maybe a talk with him can lighten up your mood. You still had to figure out how to talk to him. He was the inmate you wanted to have a bond with. An inmate who trusted you and would be honest with you. An inmate you could rely on.

You made up your mind. You were going to talk with Toby.

-------------------------

"Feeling better, kid?" Mandel asked as you walked into her office.

"Much better," You said as you sat down in front of her. "Ma'am, I'd like to have a meeting with Toby today."

"Why?"

"I talked it over with Salloum and I'm pretty sure I got the go to dig into deeper."

"You sure?"

"Positive."

No you were not.

"OK, I'll have him ready by 10."

You knew lying to Mandel was going to bite you in the ass later, but you had to do what you had to do. Some of the best officers are considered the best because they did things differently, or at least that's what Gibbons taught you.

You spent the next three hours analyzing your interview with Toby. You analyzed his awnsers and behavior in order to come up with a solid approach.

You were able to come up with a series of questions that weren't too obvious in showing your motives. One thing you learned about Toby was that he was stubborn, and you had to navigate through that. Was it going to be easy, of course not! This man is the definition of a maniac.

Back to room 111.

You sat there anxiously as you heard footsteps slowly approaching.

"Don't make me regret this, don't make me regret this," You mumbled to yourself.

Rule number 1.

As the door opened, your breath hitched as you met the manic gaze of Tobias Erin Rogers. As he eagerly took a seat in front of you, you watched as the door closed behind you.

Now it was just you and Toby.

Always take what Toby says with a grain of salt.

"How are you doing Toby?" You asked, organizing your question paper as he talked.

"Pretty shitty *WOWIE* until I heard I was talking to you today," He said with grin on his face, leaning into the palm of his hand as he looked at you with admiration.

Hell, don't even consider it.

"That's good I suppose. Now, you want to get straight to it or would you like to talk about your night first?"

"...Straight to it."

No matter how believable he seems.

"OK, so."

Because he's always five steps ahead.

--------------------

Tags: @fexthehetalialover @asimpforlife134 @my-jukebox @ch3rrydr34ms @crejia @mspoisoncoil @bruhimsoinlove @imwallysdarling @idkisimptoomuch @noclue-0 @chexrybloss0m @refrigeranteborbulhante @tak0truc @br-que-ama-yanderes @bruhimsoinlove @constantine559 @jamja @srt-buu2 @ghostwriter54 @elevenbts @officaljackmiles

[vivicas-dollhouse]

Crp in the psych ward!?!?!?

What in the world made this idea real? Idk

Genre: headcannons

Characters: ticci toby, jeff the killer, masky/tim, clockwork, kate the chaser, nina the killer

Desc: i dont know what compelled me to do this, i just did. This whole thing is just "what ifs", none of them would ever ACTUALLY go to the ward i dont think, im just really loopy on muscle relaxers

Cws: Mental hospital lingo like bootyjuice and the quiet room, ik that was a trigger for me for YEARS so i thought id mention it. (If you dont know bootyjuice is a thing injected in the ass that knocks you out for hours) (crazy shit man), and general mental illness talk

Enjoy?

Toby

-is in the ward for psychosis related homicidal ideation

-is THE BIGGEST DICK TO THE STAFF

-he starts fights immediately, bro is in there to find targets

-he WILL need to be bootyjuiced. Multiple times.

-hes also a huge flight risk, he gets his green band the last day hes there

-speaking of which, hes probably in there for 10+ days

-he doesn't make it easy on staff, he throws snacks at them and stuff

-he wont take his meds. Unless its a sleeping pill, then he will

-he loves snack time, but HATES that he cant bring it into his room

-he also is not a fan of hygiene, stinky rat

- “i dont st-stink, i sh-showered 3 days ag-ago,”

-he doesn't change unless forced to, its not a fashion show

-he hates the groups, he just straight up bed rots until hes forced to leave his room

Jeff

-he is in there for something insane, like he killed a man (or at least tried to) or something

-instantly gets sent to the high risk ward

-he calms down a bit after being bootyjuiced to high hell for breaking shit and starting a brawl

-he is placed on 1 on 1 immediately, that poor tech

-he picks up a couple assult charges while hes there, both on staff and other patients

-has to be put in the quiet room a lot

-he definitely goes from person to person taking their snacks

- “you gonna eat that? You definitely shouldn't, you could go months without eating and not feel a thing piggy bitch,”

-will try to go ada but is kept there anyways

-he is LIVID at the no blankets in the dayroom rule

-he stays in the same sweatpants and hoodie the whole time. No shoes either, grippy socks are superior

-easily 2 weeks in the ward MINIMUM

-doesn't go to group and doesn't talk to doctors, is only released because they cant keep him for longer

Masky

-is admitted for psychosis/hallucinations

-he is instantly asking to smoke, and will pester the staff asking when the next smoke break is until the doctor prescribes a nicotine patch to help with cravings

-he stays in the dayroom most the time, hes not terribly tired. just mentally

-he takes medications and works with doctors because it means he can leave sooner

-he gets a journal to write in to keep sane, its not much but anything helps

-he goes to group but doesn't talk much, he doesn't like the idea of trauma dumping to strangers

-he complains about the food and the lack of variety but he doesn't turn it away or anything

- “it aint good but im hungry enough to eat a rotting horse corpse so itll have to work,”

-changes and does hygiene daily, and washes clothes when given the chance

-the only thing thats getting him through this is the idea of a good burger, a large Dr Pepper and a pack of marlboros at the end of this

Clockwork

-is admitted for ptsd paranoia and flashbacks lasting for hours

-shes only going in if shes forced to

-she is not lucid, just straight up tweaking

-she calms down a bit once she realizes no one can get in or out without a master keycard

-she is a coloring queen, she wants to color and draw all the time

-she stays in the dayroom because she feels anxious about sleeping in the same room as someone else but eventually she is able to go to her room when she's exhausted and a tech promises to sit outside her door

-she doesn't really want meds but she takes the anxiety meds shes prescribed and they really help

- “damn this is the good shit huh?”

-she will be there for about 5 days because they cant really treat ptsd/paranoia in a hospital so she gets referred to outpatient

Kate

-in the ward for suicidal ideation and drug related psychosis

-shes quiet, rocking back and forth while she's anywhere but her room

-she stays in her room most the time, only coming out for snacks and doctors. She will always be first in line for snacks

- “whens snack time, and whats the snack?”

-she doesn't go to group that much, its too loud and mind numbing

-she doesn't talk unless she has to, shes still suffering from withdrawals and is very tired

-she gets green band quickly but doesn't leave the unit unless its to go outside or if shes being forced to go to the cafeteria for once

-she trys to change clothes but it takes too much effort to try and get up. depression is rough man

-she does enjoy a nice hot shower at the end of the day, but she hates how the bathrooms dont have real doors

-she takes meds willingly, she wants to get better despite her line of work

Nina

-is admitted for a prolonged manic episode

-she is a NIGHTMARE

-she isnt screaming on purpose, but shes so manic and talking so fast its loud

-she gets diagnosed with bipolar pretty quickly but fights doctors when they try to make her take meds

-she gets bootyjuiced for starting catfights with people at least 3 times

-shes put on high risk because she wont eat anything non-vegan and even then she barely eats

- “dont you guys know eating makes you ugly?? You have no idea what they put in that meat, fuck even the dairy you-” (ramblings)

-she fully girlrots because shes not allowed to have her cool clothes or 8 million accessories or makeup

-she does shower bc they let her bring in most her shower routine stuff and she showers a LONG TIME

-she makes friends and expects the friendships to last after the hospital but they do NOT. They never do.

[booliuu]

Can you write random ticci toby headcanons

heeeey, thx for checking out my blog!!! :D and of course! The headcanons are bit long because i love yapping about this silly guy TvT.

TW: self harm

pt 2

᭄᭡ Ticci toby General Headcanons ⊹₊

• German 🇩🇪. When he is pissed he will curse under his breath in german🧍‍♀️ no one in the mansion knows what the hell he’s saying. Has a slight accent too..!

•He’s super tall like standing between something like 5’6 or close to 6’2.. BUT HAS SUPER BAD POSTURE LIIIKE….

•Im sticking with his canon age so he’s around his mid 30’s by now .

• His favorite colors has to be green , orange, brown, red, yk warm colors.

• His hobbies consist of animal watching and petting random animals that he founds crossing path during missions or just simply hanging out around the slender forest far away from other creeps because he values his alone time.

• wood craving !!!

• speaking of wood craving oh my gosh he’s really good at it, sometimes he make his friends wooden animal figures and will leave them in their room’s as a presents :) he’s so sweet…

• listening to music from phones that he stolen from people he encounters ( if you know what i mean..)

• drawing animals he finds interesting :) I like the idea of him having a sketchbook dedicated for this specifically.

• Speaking of his hobbies , he preferable likes to do them alone because he gets overwhelmed easily ( I blame his father -) and considering his past and being teased frequently about his tics and so forth he close to non verbal. But if he does talk it close to really short responses.

Here’s angst headcanons ( it’s mostly about his past) . . . TW: self harm

• I am a very firm believer that the name “ ticci toby” was not a chosen name but rather a nickname from his bullies from school that tease him. he absolutely hates the name.

• When his family found out about his diagnoses of CIPA ( Congenital Insensitivity to Pain with Anhidrosis) they had to take matters into their own hands, and they all made sure to the house is safe for him. Such putting tabs on their showers or bath tubs so he doesn’t burn himself alive or it’s so cold that it’s concerning, making sure the food he eating isn’t too hot or cold, yk stuff like that..

• With tourette’s , I have a feeling his parents put him through countless speech & physical therapy. None will work and his father would yell at him about something he can’t control.

• When he found out about his CIPA , he tries desperately to feel pain or even any kind of bodily sensations. Such as ( TW : SELF HARM) scratching himself until he bleed , hitting himself , stuff like that. Mainly because he confused as hell why he can’t feel anything. My guess is that he so frustrated about it he can’t wrap around his head that’s the way he is.

• Every night , he goes to bed fall asleep to thoughts about what his life would been like if he was not like this….

OOOK enough angst!! here’s the continuation of his general headcanons . . .

• Yk how he has a scar on his face. Well many people like to state that he doesn’t take care of it..blah ..blah.. hides it with a mask that he always wears. Personally I feel like he takes care of himself by adding cream on to it ( proscribed by eyeless jack himself :D) , slowly but surely the scar looks better than when he first got it, he wears the mask to protect it from getting infections. ^^

• has a sweet tooth!!! It’s not just about waffles y’all just sayin…

• Even though he preferable like to do missions alone. He will sometimes bring someone with him like tim, brian , kate ( basically the whole gang-) , or ej .

• Not only he has CIPA & tourette’s but I believe he has schizophrenia, PTSD , Bipolar disorder and amnesia. especially with his encounter of slenderman is it made far worse…

dividers credit: @arneefigisikir , @saradika-graphics & @nakaharaism

A/n: Oh my gosh this was so fun to make!! I’m sorry if sentences were typed a bit weird , wonky , or very wordy TvT. I just reread your ask and it said random but… i thought it said general. i’m.. so sorry 🥲I hope this is alright if not my inbox is always open for requests :,D

* if you like my content please don’t forget to like , comment or reblog ^^

liuuboo2025 ♡ﾟ

[acexsmhking]

𝑷𝒆𝒓𝒔𝒐𝒏𝒂𝒍 𝑻𝒐𝒃𝒊𝒂𝒔 𝑳𝒐𝒓𝒆/𝑭𝒂𝒄𝒕𝒔

: ̗̀➛ Toby lore/facts

Summary: I wrote a document of Toby that contains my personal lore/facts for him along side non-canonical and original content. Get to know my perspective of Toby better!

Warning(s): 18+ content, dark themes, child abuse, alcoholism, descriptions of gore, descriptions of child abuse, cannibalism, non-canonical mentions

Subject - SCP-524-S

Full name: Tobias Erin Rogers

Date of Birth: 4/28/1994

Place of Birth: Trier, Rhineland-Palatinate Germany

Height: 6ft, 0in

Weight: 165 lbs

Name Origins: Hebrew - Good of God

Zodiac: Taurus

Immigrated to Denver, CO. US at age 5 with parental family (Father, Mother, Aunt and Sister)

Multiple detected physical disorders: TS (Tourette Syndrome, class: both), CIPA (Congenital Insensitivity to Pain with Anhidrosis)

Multiple detected mental disorders: SAD (social anxiety disorder), Depression, Bipolar III (Cyclothymic Disorder), D-PTSD (Dissociative PTSD), Autophagia, Amnesia

SCP-524-S ranges from multiple Northwest states: Oregon, Washington, Alaska, Idaho, Wyoming and Montana

SCP-524-S rarely visits Middle/South states, typically more active during Spring, Fall and Winter. Moves to costal areas during Summer.

Subject experienced symptoms of interaction with the creature known as The Operator (SCP-582) through juvenile development. Faced interaction with the creature as 14yrs

Subject has a complicated case with D-PTSD (Dissociative PTSD), and Amnesia. Cause of D-PTSD being after death of family member: Lyra Rogers, Subjects age was 17yrs.

Shortly after tragic events SCP-524-S showed an increase in irrationality and hostility. SCP-524-S experienced increasing memory loss, waking up either dirty or with strange marks, bruises, and indents on body.

Subject is noted to have chewed through the flesh of his left cheek. Other notible scars being a long cut from Subject left eyebrow to eye cause after altercation with Father. SCP-524-S also chewed flesh on both hands, right being severely injured

Seven months after tragedy event Subject was forced to wear a metal wire muzzle fitted to face by pulling wires tighter. Two years later Subject went aggressively brutally killing Father, multiple citizens in a fire

Amnesia later induced on Subject after final contact with SCP-582

SCP-524-S kills in large numbers, typically aiming on office buildings and neighborhoods. SCP-524-S may kill a few victims before entrapping builds in large man-made fire

Singular kills are mainly done in forest areas. SCP-524-S will used leftover body parts from past victims to lure in new ones. Ambushing from trees and bushes

SCP-524-S has a talent of mimicking crying, whispers, and human sounds

Prior to capture, SCP-524-S was elusive. Scent trails and tracks always cut off mid-way and Subject would be lost. Subjects infected by The Operator possibly have chameleon like abilities, blending into their surroundings but not quite teleportation

SCP-524-S has yet to willingly show these abilities

Subject described waking up in the middle of woods with no prior memory after making contact with The Operator. There Subject was met with another proxy to The Operator, Kate the Chaser

Another Subject that has remained unseen by eye or photograph. Subject described learning, living and bonding with Kate which also resulted in his habits of consuming human flesh

“We had to find our own food, eat whatever we caught” — SCP-524-S

Subject stayed in territory of SCP-582 and Kate for six years before leaving, stating SCP-582’s behavior grew increasingly hostile and violent towards him. Kate guided him to the Northern states before leaving

Subject refuses to give location of Kate

While not certain and test remain negative SCP-524-S exhibits behavior of AIWS (Alice In Wonderland Syndrome), could be cause by stressful events and ill-maintained health

When captured, it became apparent that SCP-524-S grew a bond with SCP-225-S as creature could be spotted in distance watching. Subject also had a relationship with a murder of crows

The flock could be seen at sights where victims had been found in woods, and swarmed the capture-spot of SCP-524-S seeming irritated. A few members of the flock attacked personnel

More later….

♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*•. ♪¸¸.•*¨*

: ̗̀➛ OMG WAS THIS STUPIDLY ANNOYING TO DO. I was switch between this and preparing Jack’s Masterlist and general head-canons ugh. Anyways eat this up my goofy goobers I’m gonna work on another Toby smut — Ace

-`♡´- tags list: @vanyatas @moriitis @theredservant

[oldwritingm]

the creeps!!

how about... creeps x reader who is having a ptsd response due to something/someone from their before life?

your choice!

EEE thank you for giving me a little freedom with this one hehe, you're a doll <33 (hope these are okay; I realize these aren't exactly "comforting" but these guys are messed up,, I don't think you can really expect comfort from them lol)

!!TW!! for depiction/mention of PTSD! Proceed with caution lovelies!!

Creepypasta/MH: How They React When Your PTSD is Triggered

Characters: Jeff the Killer, Clockwork, Jane the Killer, "Ticci" Toby, Tim/Masky

Jeff the Killer

I'm going to be so real with you, his first response is not going to be to comfort you

He is going to kill whoever triggered you, or burn it if it's not a person

You can try to stop him, but he's not going to

Honestly he might lowkey be making it worse, doing it right there and then with you watching

Well, he'll probably tell you to close your eyes and plug your ears first

(But if you want to participate, he'll just say: "let me do this for you, babe.")

All you'll know is that one minute it's/they're there, and the next Jeff is taking you by the shoulders and leading you away quickly

Just ignore the char/blood on his hoodie

He'll ask if you want to talk about it while you're walking

If you decline he'll ask again when you're back home

While he doesn't really need a reason to kill for you, he still wants to know what that scumbag did (or just what happened)

If you're mad at him for what he did, he's not going to care

In his eyes, he did the right thing, and he's not going to apologize for it

Anything that hurts his love deserves to perish, if not for their sake then for his

He can't stand the thought of someone/something that makes you unhappy existing in this world

If you ever stress about it again, he will actually focus on you, holding you, consoling you by repeating "they're/it's gone, they/it won't hurt you anymore..."

There's an eerie smugness to his voice as he says it...

Clockwork

I feel like you guys would've already talked about your trauma

She's prone to attacks too, so it was a mutual discussion about triggers/what helps/what doesn't

So she knows exactly what's going on when you're triggered

Her first concern is you, trying to quell the attack before it gets too bad

She'll do something you told her helps ASAP

It'll make her feel better if you let her stay with you, but she understands if you need space

What she'd really like is to hold your hand and get your mind off of it by talking about something else

She'd be fine if she was the only one talking

Just as long as you're showing signs of improvement

When the attack is over, she'll give you time to process it

But eventually she will want to bring it up again

Specifically, she wants to make plans to... uh... "eliminate" the thing that triggered you

And those plans will be vividly detailed

If you don't want to take part in that, she'll make them (and execute them) herself

She just thought you'd wanna take part; I mean, it's how she """solved""" her trauma

She won't follow through if you explicitly tell her not to, but otherwise she operates under the assumption that this is a plan, not a fantasy

When you have another attack, she won't talk about how it/they can't hurt you anymore; she'll just focus on doing the things you said helped

Jane the Killer

She's pretty good at observing people, so I think she'd be able to sense your attack early on

Even if she doesn't know about your PTSD

The first thing she does is remove you from the situation, wrapping an arm around you and rushing away

She sends the meanest scowl to anyone who looks at you funny while you go

Then she focuses on grounding you; she's not too good with feelings, but she's logical enough to try and figure something out to help you

She won't talk much; just an occasional "breathe with me" or "focus on me" while she holds your hands and maintains eye contact

It doesn't show but she's actually so nervous, she has no idea if she's really helping you

She'll be right there with you through the worst of it, and she'll be there if you want to talk after

She will want to know what caused it, if she hasn't figured it out already

I honestly don't think she'll want to "eliminate" it/them

But she will talk the nastiest, goriest, most illegal shit about it/them

She gets all giddy when you grin about it too; internally she's going yeah!! made them smile!! (happy dance)

She'll try not to bring it up intentionally, but whenever it does come up she makes sure to express her strong distaste

If you ever actually want to... take care of things, she'll help with the cleanup, but she'll want you to have the satisfaction of planning and doing it yourself

I mean, she dreams of having that satisfaction herself (looks at Jeff)

Regardless of whether or not you want to do something illegal, ultimately she respects that it's your trauma and you get to deal with it however you like

"Ticci" Toby

Murder. Arson.

Literally his knee-jerk reaction

He just looks between you and the suspected trigger, points a thumb in its direction and says: "Want me to kill that guy/light that thing up?"

If you say yes he'll do it straight away; he doesn't care who's watching

He'll ask if you want to help first though ofc

Then he'll run away giggling like a second grader, grabbing your hand on the way

When you slow down he sighs satisfactorily, saying how fun that was

If you're still distressed (or if you refused his earlier offer), he finally takes notice of your emotions

He'll ask you quite bluntly what's wrong

When you explain it to him, he just nods solemnly

He knows from experience that having a rough past sucks, so he understands completely

If you haven't already he suggests that you "take care of it"

But if you agreed to murder/arson earlier he just grins again and says "Well then it's good that we did that back there!"

If you ever have an attack again he'll either remind you that the thing/person is gone, or he'll nag you about "taking care of it"

He'll begrudgingly put an arm around you though when you don't immediately calm down

He might offer you something to fidget with, too; that always helps him when he's anxious

Just try not to be too alarmed when it's a box cutter or a butterfly knife or something weird that he puts in your hand

Tim/Masky

I feel like he'd be a little awkward when you start to panic

He'll panic a little too, asking what's wrong and if/how he can help

He'll do anything you say, but if you're unable to respond he just puts his arm around your shoulders and takes you into another room

He'll hug you against him, patting your back awkwardly while you process the attack

He doesn't know what else to do :(

He probably realizes what's happening after a few minutes, and he only gets more awkward when that happens

He sucks at dealing with his own trauma; he is literally the worst person for you to be with right now

At least that's what he thinks

When you start to calm down he asks if you want to talk about it, but then immediately curses himself for asking such a stupid question (he doesn't even want to talk about his trauma; why should anyone else? (just his thoughts))

If you do want to talk it turns into a very deep and candid discussion in which you both open up a bit

He'll ask if there's anything that helps at all

Honestly he's asking for you as much as himself; he'd love to try anything that works for you

I don't think he'd suggest or condone killing/destroying the trigger; from his experience that just brings more issues

He'll basically just tell you "yeah, it sucks, and we just have to deal. Which sucks times two."

Very helpful, thank you Tim 👍

At least he always holds you whenever you have an attack <3

Thank you so much for this request!! And thanks for reading, take care sweethearts <33

(divider by saradika)

[moriitis]

write some horror about toby.. or Ej.

one shots?? x reader?

Toby Rogers x Reader.

took me a very long while to reply to this ask, apologies! if there's mistakes i didn't proof read

Wordcount; 3.1k.

Content/Warnings; PTSD, mentions of murder, mentions of death, attempted murder, scars, mentions of vomiting, panic attacks.

There were many things you were afraid of; spiders, the dark, monsters under your bed. The thing that loomed in the dark, the possibility of being taken in your sleep. Death welcomed all regardless what race, skin color. The thing is with Death, you can't choose how it takes you. Whether it takes you in the lull of night or whether you find yourself crumpled between a car or truck. It worked in mysterious ways, ways that made your skin prickle. The topic of death was so taboo because we, as humans, do not like talking about the end. That's it really, it's the end, that life will continue to flourish without you. So, you begin to question how do you want to make an impact in life? How can you do something to ensure that you will be remembered? We all want to feel satisfied, to say that we did something in our life that was worth living - so what is it?

Well, for you, in some cases, it could be just waking up. A small victory. Perhaps even taking the day as it comes or brushing your teeth. Therapy helped too and you were proud of yourself for attending in the first place. It was nice to find a motive, a mission so to say each morning, a routine that became the norm as you took the day in small victories.

You see, you treasured every day, every small feat because nearly three years ago now, you were nearly murdered. If someone had told you that somebody would attempt to take your life, you would laugh in disbelief or perhaps you would've been more cautious to who you spoke to but no, that was the thing; life is unexpected and some days are meant to take you by surprise. Therapy was a fresh start, to help you take back control of your life and trauma and to live life to the fullest. Only, how could you knowing the man that tried to take your life had not been caught?

"I'm really impressed with your progress, I feel like compared to a couple of years ago, you have taken such big steps in the right direction and I'm really proud of you," Layla spoke. Those words felt so alien because admittedly, you were in shambles. The anniversary of your attack had crept up quicker than you had expected, leaving you in a state of dismay almost as you tried to overcome the day ahead. A sense of dread lingered within you, like something bad was going to happen and you couldn't explain it. You mostly took those days being with your parents anyway, the thought of being alone suffocating you to the max as anxiety surged through your bloodstream. You shuffled uncomfortable in the cushioned chair, forcing an uneasy smile as you tried to blink away the tears. Your eyes, despite wanting to cry, felt so dry.

"Thank you," you croaked, meeting Layla's gaze briefly before moving your focus back to the small coffee table before you. It was a rectangular coffee table, with some coasters atop it that had motivational quotes like, 'you can do it!' or 'don't give up!' It was cute and on each coaster, there was a bright colourful rainbow, some sunflowers or butterflies. Despite the fact that they felt childish, it brought you with a sense of comfort. Silence loomed over briefly as Layla sensed the tension in the air, pursing her lips and reaching over to squeeze your knee. You stirred, peeling your gaze away from the lipstick-stained coffee cup on the table before meeting Layla's concerning look.

"I know it's going to be hard - the next coming days, but it does get easier," Layla reassured, like she had read your mind. Despite the reassurance, you didn't feel comforted. That man, whoever he was, he could burst in here and kill both you and Layla in a heartbeat. You still had the scars to prove it, the deep slash on your collarbone that left you slightly crippled and deformed. A scar so deep that each night, the burning sensation rippled in shockwaves throughout your body and leaving you in a feverish sweat.

"I know," you replied sheepishly as you sighed softly, your body deflating a little as you tried to process her words and comfort. "I think I'll be okay-" you started, the memories tormenting you the longer you dwelled on the subject. "I'm just so.. terrified that he'll find me, that he will finish the job-" Layla could sense the anxiety emitting from your form and she shuffled herself, the idea of being bludgeoned to death not really entertaining her. With a gentle shake of her head, followed by a soft tut, Layla interrupted your thought process.

"You got away once and he's probably too ashamed to come back knowing that you survived," her words, which meant to bring consultation, only brought you more worry.

"But what if it's the opposite? What if he's fuelled by the fact that I'm alive, that I live everyday in fear, he's toying with my mind, I just know he is-" You were rambling, feeling your body coat itself in sweat. Layla quickly shut you down, giving your knee another squeeze in an attempt to snap you out of your hysterics.

"You are safe," she spoke each word out thoroughly, ensuring your safety as the kept an intense look on your being. "I promise." Swallowing back a lump, you nodded slowly. You wanted to believe her and her words, you wanted to tell yourself this but you simply couldn't. This man, whoever he was, he had no remorse and he was hellbent on ensuring you would die to his hands. You shivered and your shoulders shuddered as you moved to tuck a strand of hair behind your ear, steadying your breathing for a moment.

Forcing a smile, you simply gave a nod before uttering a soft; "yeah." Layla sat back in her chair, securing the clipboard on her knee as she glanced down at the writing on paper. She sighed, filling the silence before smiling.

"Well, I'll see you next week?" she asked, leaning over to then grab her cup of coffee. The side of the cup had stains of her lipstick, a soft pink that complimented her features and skin tone. A part of you was thankful that this was over and yet that sense of impending doom still lingered in the pit of your stomach, like a part of you expected to leave her office and suddenly find yourself get jumped from around the corner. Shuffling down to reach for your bag, you lifted it up and swung it over your shoulder before standing.

"Yeah, next week, see you then." Then you slowly shuffled over to the door, hand lingering on the handle. You could feel Layla's eyes on your back, observing you quietly as you bit on the bottom of your lip. You hated this, you hated that your fear and trauma consumed you. That it controlled every aspect of your life, you were always on high alert no matter what. So many people praised you for your bravery, courage but you didn't feel those things. Deep down, your attacker fed on your fears and chewed you from inside to out. There were so many unanswered questions, why you? As far as you could tell, you didn't know him.

"He's not there," Layla then spoke and quickly you shot a glance over your shoulder toward her, a soft smile across her wrinkled features as she motioned to the door. "Nothing will hurt you out there." And she was right, her office was just in the most secure part of town, in a building surrounded by other people that were not going to hurt you. So, with a nod, you shot her a thankful smile and disappeared into the hall. The hall was empty, aside from the occasional chatter that happened behind each door that littered down the pristine hall. There were some chairs pressed against the wall, some posters about therapy and information booklets about different kinds of disorders and how to know when you should get help. Admittedly, a part of you couldn't help but feel as if you were just wasting Layla's time, that she could be talking to someone who really needs the help. Stepping out into the hall was a relief, knowing that nothing dangerous awaited you around the corner.

The walk home was the same, stopping by your local smoothie shop to grab yourself a smoothie before heading down toward the subway. It was busy, people nattering, men and woman in business suits and some tourists here and there. The city was so different compared to your small town back home and a part of you hated being around so many people but you had no choice, this was the only place you could get a good therapist and the smoothie place made it all worth the while. As you stepped off the escalator and headed your way to the track you needed, you glanced up and down the platform cautiously before setting yourself down in a seat just opposite the tracks. It was midday so it wasn't that busy, most the people here quiet and occupied with either a book or their phone. It brought an odd sense of comfort to you, that despite the fact you disliked large crows, it was nice to know that there were this many people around just in case something were to happen.

Taking a sip of your smoothie, you savoured the fruity taste as you watched and observed the people around you. Admittedly, you loved people-watching, you loved to listen in on conversations or glance over their shoulder to see what they were doing on their phone. You were a nosy person, you would admit that and there was something so joyful about watching life around you. Knowing that everyone had a worry, a lover, that something was going on in their life, that maybe they had just lost a loved one. It made you so curious and honestly, a little thankful to still be here today. You sighed in content, waiting for your train as you glanced up at the board before you. Another twelve minutes, you didn't mind. The train ride in the subway was ten minutes, then another twenty minute train to get out of the city. It was a lot of time and effort but it got you out your house and thus, helping overcome your fear a little.

As you felt yourself slip into a daydream, a figure stepped past your vision which caused you to blink back into focus of your surroundings. You were cautious of thieves and robbers, so your bag was placed atop your lap securely as you held the smoothie atop it. A man, with his hands stuffed into his pockets, stepped past you and took the empty seat beside you and despite the fact you avoided his gaze, you still smiled softly just to show your friendly manner. You could smell the soft hint of aftershave on him, along with deodorant which was feint but there nevertheless. Unlike everyone else, his focus was on the people around him, watching life pass by; much like you had been doing previously. It was nice to know you weren't the only one and from the corner of your eye, you glanced at him. He was close, so close that your elbows were practically grazing against one another and you shuffled awkwardly to try and make it seem as if you were just readjusting your bag atop your lap. He wore a brown coat which sat atop a flannel shirt, giving off an almost rustic, emo look. There was a patch of stubble on the bottom of his chin, his hair messy and brown which was slightly longer in the back.

With focus back on the bustle in front of you, you took another sip of your smoothie. For once, you felt relaxed and at peace.

"I found you." You froze, brows narrowing in confusion as you glanced around. That voice, it sounded so similar that it immediately raised the hairs on the back of your neck. Slowly, you craned your head over toward the brunette that was sat beside you. His gaze was down, focus solely on what seemed his shoes as you raised a questioning eyebrow. Was he talking to you? Had you succumbed to madness and now you were hearing voices? Your heart, which was once a steady beat, was now pounding against your ribcage in hysterics as you tried to comprehend what was unfolding before you. Perhaps he was on the phone or maybe he was talking to someone else. There were a lot of crazies here in the city and shit, you felt as if you were turning into one yourself.

"Hm?" You hummed softly, too scared to make even a peep. The brunette was stifling a grin, a shit eating grin that smacked you across the face almost, his gaze remaining on the tiled flooring below the both of you.

"I s-said.. I found youu~" There was a sing song tone to his voice, a mocking tone as his head finally, eyes peeling off the tiles to meet your gaze. You hadn't noticed, but you were squeezing the smoothie cup so tight that it were about to spill over, your body freezing as your brain began to battle between fight or flight. That voice, the same voice from the very same night, the one that mocked your cries and screams as you fought for your life. Despite the fear, you kept telling yourself over and over again that you were safe, that you were in public and there was nothing he could do to hurt you but that look - the way he soaked in your expression and the way his body shook in excitement, it filled you with a wave of sickness that was about to spew. This had to be some cruel trick, a prank gone too far; one of those annoying influences that secretly record you for content. This felt too real though, too specific and to any other person, his comments wouldn't make most sense. His piercing brown eyes made contact with the scar that exposed itself from the collar of your shirt, a scar he was familiar with, a scar that painted your collarbone beautifully and he chuckled a sick chuckle.

On the brink of hysteria, you shuffled further away from him, the only noise you could conjure up was nothing but a pathetic whimper. You shuffled further and further until your ass connected with the tiles below, using the grip on your shoes to scramble further and further away from this mad man. You neglected the smoothie, the contents now a colourful mess on the floor as you kept the bag pressed closed to your abdomen. Despite the commotion, passer-by's did not bat an eye as you helplessly tried to catch their eye contact, pleading for somebody to help you. For now, you were nothing but a spec of dirt on the tiled floor, even if you were bleeding out; nobody would ache a care toward you. So, with that thought in mind, you scrambled to your feet and ran to the nearest exist. Your legs shook and at times it felt as it you were about to buckle as you came crashing into the oncoming traffic of people, who grunted or yelled out at you in the growing distance. Whatever you had to do, you needed to be safe. The cops, the security guard, anyone and as you ran down the halls of the subway, a soft scream escaped from within you.

With burning lungs, you could see the escalators closing in and there, the local information desk. The worker who sat uninterested inside the booth, eating away at a croissant as they focused more on the paper below them than anything else.

"Help-!" You screamed, approaching the desk in a speed you couldn't comprehend as you slammed your hands down on the desk. The man behind it jumped briefly before sitting up, brushing the crumbs of the pastry off his cotton jumper. You were sweaty and your anxiety attacked every part of you as you felt the surge of passing out. Gasping for breath for a moment, you snapped a head around your shoulder to check that he wasn't following. "Please, help me, please-" you began to ramble, tears now unknowingly falling down your cheeks. The man behind the counter was now taken aback a little, trying to make sense of your endless rambling.

"Hold on, hold on," he spoke, throwing his hands up to try and slow you down and allow you to catch your breath a little. He was right, you needed to calm down but you simply couldn't knowing that you could die any minute!

"No!" you yelled, slamming another fist down on the counter. By now, many people were watching, eager and curious as to what the big fuss could be about. You didn't need this, you hated the attention and you heard the chuckles of a group of teens as they whipped their phones out to record.

"I'm going to die! He's trying to murder me! Please, listen to me!" you begged helplessly, the words feeling so raw that the flood of emotions consumed you, knees buckling and you falling flat back on your ass. Your throat hurt from the screaming, lips dry as you sucked in breaths to try and ignore the incoming panic attack that was looming over you. The man stood quickly to lean over the desk, glancing down at you from the tip of his nose. Everyone was muttering, glancing around cautiously; more concerned for themselves than they were for you.

"I'm gonna need some people here, got some crazy lady," the man spoke into a radio that once sat on his hip. The blood within you boiled and bubbled with rage, the idea of being referred to as crazy when he had no idea what you had endured; the trauma!

"Babe, hey, relax!" A voice called out from within the crowd and suddenly, your sobbing ceased to exist as you slowly turned to face the voice. "Shit, I'm so ss-sorry, she gets like this, I'll take her home." The brunette spoke to the man behind the counter, exchanging an apologetic smile before kneeling down to meet your level. His look, once soft, now turned into something more sinister. "I'll look after you."

[starstruck-sillies]

"I didn't say I have NPD, I just said I'm narcissistic, it comes from greek mythology so it's not exclusive to the disorder"

"Oh so you have PTSD and are traumatised? Well all of us are traumatised, don't act like you're special"

"OMG you're autistic and your special interest is pokemon? I'm obsessed with it too, our experiences are so similar"

"I know you're depressed but you shouldn't let your disorder dictate your life"

"I don't understand why people people think people with delusions are so different from alterhumans. Like... How do you know? It's all just a spectrum. You're just trying to create a boundry where there's none"

"Well you can't be sure that vaccines aren't the thing that causes autism, it's so underresearched"

"Saying that Autism and ADHD should be medicalized is so weird. There is no reason to see them as disorders"

When you switch DID with different disorders you can see how albeist SOME endos sound. If you don't believe they say such things, some of them are literally picked from the syscourse tag, I've just changed them up a little bit, because I wouldn't want the people to be found and harassed or something. Also just because you think our experiences are similar, doesn't mean they should be put in the same box./nay Also just because a disordered person relates to non-disordered experiences it's still doesn't mean it should be put in the same box. Also even if it is a spectrum, a boundry should still be made for the good of both sides. If you claim you don't have a disorder, then you should let disordered people be their own thing and have their own spaces. And I'm NOT saying shared spaces shouldn't exist at all or that these experiences cannot overlap at all. Anyway I don't want to ramble too much (tho I'm scared people will start putting words in my mouth if I don't clarify everything) so I'll just end here

Beautifully put. It really does sound extremely strange the kind of things they say if you put it in any other context.

-Toby

[dystopiandramaqueen]

The way Nick was acting when he "betrayed" June was more like a victim imo did you see how he acting around wharton? looks more to me like someone that's been abused and being manipulated saying sorry about mentioning the wall to nick and he wants to help nick so he has to tell him everything and we're supposed to believe he's evil now? I don't think this is just press interviews I really do think they want to go there with Nick in the show too

I’ve got really bad complex PTSD.

So many ppl do.

From childhood trauma, alcoholic or emotionally unavailable parents, death of loved ones, abusive jobs, toxic family, illness, injury.

Life hurts us. We collect damage. It makes our brains abnormal. For me- loud unexpected noises, or certain tones of voice make me feel like I’m going to die. Dogs. Ice. Cold. The triggers make me feel like I’m a scared little kid. Even though I’m a fully grown adult. I’ll do almost anything to get out of triggering situations it’s truly like torture.

What I saw Max show us was PTSD.

Nick looked like a scared little kid in that scene.

He’s a stone cold killer. We’ve seen Nick kill Fred and Cushing indirectly- leading them to their death- then we saw him straight up execute Putnam and Toby.

Nick was in HIS house. Alone. No witnesses. If he’d felt fully empowered? He could have shot that motherfucker.

So yea. PTSD. Fear so visceral it paralyzes you and makes you think you’re going to die.

That scene was so visceral. I felt really small and scared and trapped, just watching it. Max is such a fucking good actor.

Hulu may have wanted a “betrayal” scene but Max gave us a complex emotional feast.

Maybe that’s why they’re confused. Maybe they don’t WATCH the show.

They just wanted Max to read their script.

But it’s Max’s character, he identifies with Nick- and the way he played it made perfect sense and felt consistent w/ the character we love.

[ketamollykaine]

Creepypasta AU Headcanons

Midnight City: Ticci Toby

★ He is 26, born on April 28th. He's a Taurus sun, Aquarius Moon, Aries Rising, Gemini Mercury, Libra Venus, Sagittarius Mars, Cancer Jupiter, Aries Saturn, Aquarius Neptune, Sagittarius Pluto.

★ Toby is 5'11" and is pretty slim, but has a bit of muscle mass. It's taken him a lot of time to grow due to CIPA and delayed growth hormones. He doesn't get many chances to have nutritious meals, given his proxy status.

★ Is from a lower middle class family from Denver, Colorado with German descent on his mother's side. Connie taught him quite a but of German, so sometimes he'll speak what he can remember.

★ His amnesia caused him to forget Lyra and his parents, but the C-PTSD he suffers from gives him anxiety around cars, hospitals, older women with dark hair, and men with light hair. He's subconsciously platonically attracted to women with lighter hair.

★ Toby has a cute, boy-ish face. Even though his right cheek is chewed through, he still has some softness to his face, but otherwise has a strong, defined jawline.

★ Thick brows all day. Very expressive and uses them a lot when communicating.

★ His non-verbal tics include cracking his knuckles, whistling, cracking his neck, bending backwards, turning his head to the side, and snapping his left hand repeatedly.

★ Some of his verbal tics are "Hi!" "Hey!" "Fuck!"

★ He doesn't get much sleep, so he has pretty sunken in eyes with dark circles, but his eyes themselves are a dark brown and still have a light to them. He's a sad boy, but there's some sunshine left in him.

★ Loves to take walks alone and talk to himself for hours. He'll entertain the voices in his head just as much as they entertain him. One can often find him laughing to himself and cracking jokes.

★ Even thought he's a generally upbeat guy, there's still a storm inside. More often than not, the voices are volatile and tell him to hurt himself and others. If it gets really bad, he'll go out and find someone to kill just to shut them up. He won't hurt himself, even thought he can't feel it. He knows the importance of keeping himself as healthy as possible due to his multiple conditions.

★ Works for Slenderman and is 100% under his control. Has no moral compass like Tim and Brian, even sometimes Kate.

★ Likes to wear neutrals and earth tones to blend into his surroundings. His typical garb includes blue jeans that are stained with dirt, a black turtleneck, a tan carharrt jacket with a fur lining, leather gloves, steel toe combat boots with one boot ladder laced with blue and the other with black.

★ Referring to the blue ladder laces, yes, Toby has killed a cop. Several actually.

★ Lives in a cabin in the woods with Tim, Brian, and Hopper. He took the smallest room, it feels more cozy to him.

★ Doesn't have many hobbies, but really enjoys nature. He'll collect firewood for the cabin and summer bonfires. I feel like he gets stereotyped as the lumberjack/woodsman, but it just fits, y'know? Sometimes he'll make collages out of found magazines or even just make zines.

★ Has a strong punk mindset and belief system. His style leans more towards midwest emo though.

★ Some of his favorite songs are "Geek Bar" by T!lt, "XANNY" - FIDLAR (Billie Eilish), "Pale" - Modern Color, and "Fentanyl" by McCafferty

★ Has his left eyebrow pierced, a dermal on his left cheek, both nostrils (spiked piercing), his tongue, and several cartilage piercings. Is looking to get a coin slot or a hole punched in one of his ears.

★ Surprisingly he doesn't have any tattoos yet. Piercings are easier for him because they're quick and his tics don't interfere too much.

★ Doesn't care for energy drinks too much, they make him uncomfortably jittery.

★ His best friends include Brian/Hoodie, Jeff the Killer, Eyeless Jack, and Dove/Hopper.

★ On his time off, he likes to go camping and travel to any closely lakes or beaches.

★ One of his bits is going "uh oh, Uh oh, Uh Oh, UH OH!" when something minor goes wrong. Sometimes he'll do this when something serious goes wrong and depending on the proxy he's with, they'll either smack the back of his head or join him.

★ Says "I'm gonna touch you." to Tim at least 4 times a week

[strawberryflavoredvenum]

Creepypasta mental health hcs

Like always, I am completely disregarding the cannon(and my earlier hcs) ^⁠_⁠^

Also tw: mental illness (duh), self harm, psychosis, depersonalization. Idk tw everything.

Also I hope everyone knows that none of these disorders create these kinds of people. This is all fiction and 99% of people with these disorders don't even get close to this. Ik it sounds obvious but I still want to remind you. I have ptsd, asd, and persistent depression. I also have friends with some of these and they are all amazing people. I mean this for personality disorders/disorders with stigma like npd or bpd as well.

Toby

❤️ schizophrenia

He has an even mix negative and positive symptoms. He doesn't experience them all at the same time. The negative symptoms are more common throughout the day, but the positive ones are more severe. (negative or positive does not mean good or bad. They are terms used to describe whether or not a symptom adds or takes away something to someone's behavior/functioning. A positive symptom can be hallucinations, while a negative symptom may me impaired attention)

His negative symptoms include not taking care of himself, self isolation, alogia (made worse when people bullied him for his speech patterns/tourettes), and anhedonia.

Positive symptoms include scrambled speech (word salad), delusions of persecution, auditory and visual hallucinations. Auditory:voices, name calling, other proxies voices, crying and screaming. Visual: bugs, shadow people, Lyra, hands, visual distortion. He also feels paranoid and nihilistic thinking.

During episodes he is known to hide, lash out, extreme emotional outbursts of fear, paranoia, anger or sadness. He also displays agitation, poor hygiene, and a lack of social awareness.

❤️Pica

Idk but I've always head cannoned him to have this. He is kinda sneaky about it so other proxies watch him closely around objects he's been known to try. Things like paper, paint chips, parchment, or anything with a ceramic/clay pottery/glass like consistency.

❤️tourettes

It's not as severe in my hc as it is in cannon. Still noticeable though. If he could feel it, his neck would be in so much pain.

❤️cipa

This is self explanatory. He has to check himself over with a mirror so he doesn't accidentally leave an injury untended. He finds random bruises he didn't know about all the time. He has to take great care to make sure he doesn't forget about injuries, letting them get infected. He has many scars. Also a couple chunks bitten out of his cheek and tongue.

❤️ He needs more help than the other proxies but has learned to live with his disorders and hold a routine. Toby is willing accept help, but only from certain people that he trusts and cares for. He tries his best every day to be better than the next.

Nina

❤️ manic depression

She has horrible episodes of depression, with intense mood swings. She was originally diagnosed with bipolar. She'll either be in bed all day, flirting/obsessing over Jeff(who is not reciprocating) or getting into arguments and impulsively spending her money. She also struggles with self harm. She hides it behind sleeves or heavy bracelets. Jane worries and checks on her often to make sure she's okay. Bringing her food and trying to get her to take a walk when Nina is depressed. When Nina is manic, Jane tries to ground her and keep her on a routine. She feels very guilty afterwards. Her friends understand. They all have issues.

❤️ hypersexuality

She doesn't have a lot of sex but she has intense intrusive thoughts about it. Especially involving jeff. She doesn't like to open up about it because of the stigma. She doesn't want people to see her as a slut or something. Most of them would never think that of her or anyone with hypersexuality. They wouldn't care if she was a whore to begin with.

❤️ Erotomania

She is convinced that Jeff and her are meant to be. She finds random signs that Jeff is reciprocating in things that don't exist. Jeff doesn't like her very much. Other proxies feel uncomfortable about it and try to keep them separate. (Nina would never cross the line into predatory behavior. None of the proxies are like that.) It's gotten much better but she falls back into old thought patterns during episodes. Nina has learned to respect boundaries and respect Jeff's.

❤️ drug abuse

She's been known to abuse party drugs. They are hard to get as a proxy(and also banned in the house) so it's much less severe than before.

❤️ histrionic personality disorder

She feels much more intensely in every way. She believes that her friendships are closer than they are, her emotions have no middle ground, and she has strong opinions on everything. She has some attention seeking tendencies and feels bad when she doesn't receive the desired response. She isn't a liar but often exaggerates when she tells stories.

❤️Nina is pretty receptive to help as long as she isn't in an episode. Sometimes she feels hopeless and gives up but not for long. She watches a lot of online therapy videos since they can't get a therapist.

Jeff

❤️ Antisocial personality disorder

He struggles to have much care for other people or their feelings. He's incredibly impulsive and thrill seeking. This has made him both the best and worst proxy in the mansion. He doesn't see the moral issue with lying. Luckily he's pretty bad at it and can never keep his story straight. His mood throughout the day is either agitated or bored. Becoming a proxy has made his antisocial behavior worse because he is able to justify it in his mind. If you asked him, he would say that he doesn't love anyone. Though he doesn't care for anyone, he likes being around Liu. His brother is one of the only people he chooses to talk to outside of joking or missions.

❤️ trichotillomania

Skin picking was always something he did but it got much worse after the fire. He tends to pick at the area between burned, and normal skin. He does the same with his scars. Putting bandages on his arms can help prevent picking. He tries not to look in mirrors often. Not because he hates how he looks, but it makes him want to pick more.

❤️psychosis

It's how he became "Jeff the killer" in the first place. In the early stages, he becomes more paranoid, disorganized, and stops taking care of himself. During the episode, he becomes mistrustful, agitated, comes to random conclusions/assumptions, doesn't sleep for days, and becomes more hostile. The full episode can last from a week to a month.

❤️ insomnia

He stays up until he drops. He doesn't try to help his insomnia until someone else intervenes. It majorly exacerbates his other problems.

❤️ He's generally not open to change. he could have gotten better if his parents had caught/cared it sooner. Liu isn't going to give up on him though. He doesn't care how much Jeff complains or lashes out. Liu and Slenderman are the only ones able to get Jeff to cooperate or calm down.

Liu

❤️ptsd

He isn't upset at his brother. But he still survived a horrific ordeal because of him. Sometimes when helping Jeff through an episode, he'll accidentally trigger Liu. Liu is determined to help Jeff, even if his PTSD makes it hard. He has bad nightmares about waking up to see Jeff. He tries to isolate when it gets bad. Jeff doesn't notice when Liu is struggling but when he finds out, he tries to help in his own way. Usually giving him space since he knows Liu's PTSD is mostly from him. Liu feels guilty about it.

❤️ codependence

Liu doesn't feel that he has anything left after everything that's happened. Even if Jeff was the one to kill their parents, and almost him, he is all Liu has left. He doesn't like living here but he'll go anywhere his brother goes. He feels responsible. Jeff would never admit this but Liu knows Jeff still needs him.

❤️major depressive disorder

He's had it since he was a kid. He feels empty and his motivation to do anything goes down the drain. His appetite is one of the first things to go. Not because he isn't hungry, but he doesn't feel like leaving his room. He'll sit at his desk staring at the work he needs to do or lay in bed.

Helen

❤️ autism spectrum disorder

He's always felt different. Never really known how to interact with others. He mostly keeps to himself. You don't need to learn to talk to people if you never talk to them. He has a system for everything that makes it easier for him. He keeps most things about himself private because he can be sensitive. Before he became a proxy, he tried to mask but he doesn't care anymore.

❤️Social phobia

All the bullying wrecked his self esteem. He feels that everyone is judging him. The other proxies don't see him much. He would rather sit in his room doing art. He even got a mini fridge so he wouldn't have to leave as much. He has heart palpitations and feels nauseous when he has to interact with the more abrasive proxies(Jeff).

❤️ generalized anxiety

Even before the bullying, he's always been an anxious person. He fidgets and double checks everything around him to make sure nothing will go wrong.

❤️ paranoid personality disorder

He generally does not trust others. It's not completely inaccurate half the time. He feels that others are out to get him. Relationships are really hard because he doesn't believe anyone actually likes him.

❤️ He's neutral about recovery but he needs to let someone in. He won't get better unless he learns to rely on someone else but he's scared.

Jane

❤️ptsd

Like Liu, she also has ptsd after what Jeff put her through. Unlike Liu, she hates Jeff for what he did. She feels angry about it because she didn't deserve what happened to her. She has a hard time letting herself fall asleep and has had panic attacks. She doesn't remember most of what happened and that might be for the best.

❤️body dysmorphia

She had this since middle school but it got worse when she was burned. The fire and left her body burned and scarred. She tries not to think about it but she misses how she looked before. She covers up a lot because she doesn't like her burns being stared at. Also because the burns are sensitive.

❤️she is actually trying her best to get better. She reads books and does meditation.

❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️❤️