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I'm on my betrayal loving bullshit again thinking of some shit like, the typical hero plot where one lies to an ally to intentionally mislead them and keep them away from danger, but it's hidden under the guise of, something that can be REALLY shitty on the surface, and I'm thinking about a yandere coming to "collect" you after revealing the truth and you're all "oh, ok, I understand! I'm still staying here and not coming back with you though :)"
Batman showing up at your apartment, "listen I know I started voicing complaints and even initiated the vote to kick you from the Justice League BUT it was all part of my contingency plan, there was a mole in the League connected to Darkseid and--" and you just hit him with "ok great thats awesome good for you um, I destroyed my costume and threw it in the garbage and I'm an alcoholic now and also thanks for making me realize how much I hate myself and how I never belonged anywhere, you can go now ok thanks byeeee :')" and here therein commences the mass surveillance on your phone/house/walking routes/internet use/the inside of your bedroom--
Same idea twice really but, Miguel coming back from those one ideas I had, "hey, I'm sorry I kicked you out of the Spider Society because you weren't trying to date anyone in your universe, also maybe we fooled around a little and had mutual feelings and I broke your heart by kicking you out and trying to get you to date in your own universe, but it turns out canon isn't real, so, 👉👈🥺❤️?" and here you are, "oh cool, I wish you happiness with whomever you choose :) I'm glad I'm 'allowed' to be single since, you know, you proved to me i dont belong anywhere :)"
Gojo "I'm sorry I bullied you and called you weak when you wanted to go up against this one curse but it was actually way stronger than you and you would have died if I hadn't talked you out of it" Satoru standing there with disbelief as he sees you've gotten rid of anything to do with Jujutsu Tech (uniform, equipment, or otherwise), "being a sorceror is stupid. You were right, I'm NOT cut out for it. I think I want to settle down. I'm gonna give Nanami a call"
You gotta take the character that's totally down bad for you and have them absolutely break your heart and then when they come back for you and reveal, actually, they may have had an extremely good reason for doing so and never wanted to anyways, you're just like "actually you know what? You opened up deeper psychological wounds inside of me and fundamentally damaged me and I don't think I can be the same person you remember me as anymore" and leaving them DESPERATE to keep you, any version of you, in their lives at all costs
#yandere x reader#yandere batfam#yandere jjk#yandere spiderverse#sighhhhhhh still thinking about Miguel and was also transferring a lot of my drafts into word docs over the last few days
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so with echoes of wisdom .. i havent watched any of the trailers beyond the very first one and the thumbnails/screenshots and what others have said about it-
but with the world inside the rift being called "Welt des Nichts" aka "world of nothing/void" in german ('still' in english, for some reason) and demises title in french being "avatar of nothing" ... yeah my anxiety is shooting through the roof again
(hopefully you can be a little more forgiving for me being anxious/weird about it bc demise is my blorbo)
i had similar worries with totk, that werent proven true thankfully, but the darn book is making it all worse again with all those weird lore things the game doesnt even so much as hint at AND potential retcons- im in for a really rough time huh, not just stress in real life (more in tags.. its alot) but now about my specific hyperfixation from two things even (AND artblock still..)
weird as it may sound, i dont want demise to get more lore, partly bc i dont believe theyd do anything with him that i would like (given their track record) but much more importantly- the fact that he has this little lore about him is precisely one of the reasons why i fell in love with him, i tend to like characters that are neglected by the narrative, and his story being both so flat and already done meant i can be very creative with what i come up with for him without necessarily contradicting anything in canon (which is ... or was a big point of how i wrote destiny's story and lore, working with canon in a way that reframes it all without straight up ignoring it ... but i suppose i urgently need to let go of that and accept i spend alot of time working things that will go to waste :( ) AND not having to worry that there will be more stuff with him that would massively change not only what im writing but also potentially how i feel about him since the game he was briefly in was the oldest chronologically and ended with his death- i didnt expect them to mess with anything that far back and thought theyd just go forward and leave the timeline behind and wouldnt mess with it again, given how botw seemed to be a sort of 'fresh start' that seemingly regarded the past as the past that needs to rest and that the timeline was finally no longer a discussion if everythings unified through botw and one thing going forward
but i suppose i was very wrong with that .__.
right now the only thing that motivates me still is the left over determination and spite to work on my zelda comic, since i have never gotten this far and really want to get something done for once, but i cant lie that im feeling like i should pause all work on it too to wait and see waht the book and the new game will do .. either to determine if i still have the will to keep working on it after those things are out (my love for tloz has been taking alot of hits lately ..) or if i have to change stuff (mostly bc of my lore problem trying to not ignore it ..)
#ganondoodles talks#zelda#ganondoodles rants#sorta#suicide attempt mention in the IRL stuff im talking about in the following tags btw#theres some construction stuff on our house going on#and my father is extremely stressed about it#he used to be very explosive- being silent and then exploding out of nowhere .. probably left me with lasting damage yippie-#but now he much more lets it eat at himself bc hes old and feels bad for the past stuff so now it makes him irritated and depressed#my older brother is the most normal cis straight guy you can imagine and incredibly impatient and bossy (you CANNOT talk with him)#(brother doesnt live in our house)#and while hes helping out hes doing it exactly how my father doesnt like and since you cant talk to the guy (explosive +200) it stresses hi#to the point of my father yesterday saying that “it would have been better if i had just died back in the day”#likely referring to the time when he was drafted for the military against his will and tried to kill himself#which i learned only like .. a year ago- theres so little my parents tell me ....#its like my mother telling me- while my father was in hospital for heart surgery- that she not only almost died back when i was a young tee#and only survived bc of some incredibly unebelievable lucky coincidences (medics on a travel being there that knew what she had-#-while our local doctors said welp- nothing we can do lady AND them beign there with a helicopter and emergency transferring her#to antoher bigger hospital while giving her immediate treatment our local one didnt do- AND at the big one just so happened to have-#-an expert on that illness in the facility when she arrived who was able to narrrowly save her life#BUT ALSO while she was recovering and weak and frail as a dust bunny witnessing someone stealing hospital surplies-#not noticing she was in the room at first (which .. the nurses left her in the nurse room while going on break ... which uhm .. yeah cool)#and if my mother hadnt acted in time like she was fully asleep and the lady stealing stuff beign in hurry- she might have killed her#without my mother being able to fight back bc she could barely even talk (the nurses didnt want to believe her when they got back either)#ANYWAY that comment from my father brough me to tears#and my mom is trying out more ... other medication shes not prescribed in hopes of it helping agaisnt her many pains#but i worry it will interact with the other stuff shes on ...#and i worry so much about both of their mental and physical well being#always trying to be the one to calm them down or help with communication bc that is a big problem in this houesehold#but i myself am also a very much not normal and not medicated shut in who has trouble dealing even with my own feelings
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post-nut gender crisis
#captains orders#this has been in my drafts for months and it keeps staring at me when i transfer my drawings between devices#(i use tumblr drafts instead of like. emailing myself like a normal person)#so i figured id let it go free
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Timeskip Marnie concept
#pkmnart#trainer Marnie#Pokemon Marnie#Pokemon#artists on tumblr#my art#Pkmn#marnie#this is draft 1 so it may change over time as stuff does#okay technically 2 if you could my one from early 2022 but none of that transfered over to this one it’s a new design so starting fro we#so basically draft 1
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i really hate to do this but i think i just have to throw it out there. my family and i are in a lot of debt, mostly bc of rent (i don't know the exact amount bc my dad refuses to tell me), and we recently had some emergencies come up (had to take our dog to the vet + 2/3 of our cars for our family of 4 went kaput in the last month). i got paid last thursday and immediately gave the entire paycheck to my dad. i've been doing this with every paycheck for the last 3 years. i wish i could offer commissions or other compensation of some kind, but doing so on top of my full time job made me injure my hand so bad that i've been in near constant pain for the last year and a half
i have a kofi https://ko-fi.com/willyum
i already hate asking for donations, so please don't donate if you can't. i'm not even expecting or hoping for that much, but even just recouping some of the ~$350 emergency vet bill would ease a lot of anxiety. i appreciate any support i get on this, and that includes simply spreading it if you so choose. thank you <3
#i say things#i also have a paypal that ppl can send directly to if they wanna circumvent the transfer fees but#idk im nervous to just post that. deadname aside LOL#but if we're friends or mutuals you can ask for it ig#yes I’m posting this late at night bc this has been in my drafts for 4 days#and I’ll keep chickening out and putting it off if I’m Too Awake
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I just realized here in 419 is the first time he's ever said yoichi's name out loud
there's only been three other times in the present where he's referred to yoichi by name and they've all been in his thoughts
took him being in utter despair at the thought of yoichi being gone forever for it to happen, but it finally did. I still think yoichi may still be around in some way and that he's wrong about yoichi being completely destroyed. this scene gives me hope that if yoichi does appear again he'll say afo's true name out loud and we'll finally have a canon name for him.
#I specified present because he's also refers to him by name in his thoughts in 408 when he realizes the quirk transferred#and I wanted to just stick with things he's said in the present#also this is operating under the assumption afo does have a regular name and isn't just afo....#entirely possible but I have hope he does have a different name#been meaning to post more but I've been depressed lol I still got a lot more I been meaning to talk about in my drafts @_@
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Hiiiii may I humbly ask you to write a little planymphia excerpt for us? I love your writing and I love this pairing ❤️
Hi bestie I am way ahead of you I already have multiple planymphia things in the works I tried to stay away but I got converted into it 🤭 here’s just a tiny little intro I wrote in my mind on my drive home from work today
~~~~~~
Jane didn’t believe in love at first sight. She didn’t believe in love at second sight either, or third. Honestly, love was never really on her radar. Until she met Nymphia, that is.
Nymphia shouldn’t have been anything special. She was just a girl, like all the rest. Another pretty girl for Jane to bring home from the bar and then never see again.
Sex wasn’t complicated. Hookups weren’t complicated. Jane enjoyed pretty women and they enjoyed her. But emotions were messy, and Jane didn’t do mess.
Nymphia was messy. Everything about her was chaos and impulsion wrapped up in a yellow-haired bow. Jane should have run when she still had the chance.
#wrote this in my head while driving and then transferred it directly here#so if it makes no sense. that’s not my problem (me when I lie)#anyways I hope you enjoy I’m about to pass out for my post work nap but I am genuinely excited to write more planymphia#now that I finished my draft for ch8 I can finally put real work into other fics :)#ask#asks#anon#drag race#rpdr#RuPaul’s drag race#drag race 16#rpdr 16#RuPaul’s drag race 16#plane Jane#✈️#Nymphia wind#planymphia#also fun fact#In class Thursday I hand wrote planymphia fic I have a photo I sent to a friend#it makes me laugh :)#also will I continue this?#maybe :)#I don’t have an actual plot idea for it but I bet I could come up with something#my writing#drag race fanfic#drag race fanfiction
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missing my google docs so much right now... goodbye pureshadow soulmate au... goodbye eternal sugar study.... goodbye truth potion shenanigans... goodbye bthb wip... goodbye bad end plan.... goodbye love potion wip... i will miss you forever (read: however long it takes for me to procure a hard drive)
#desperately need to transfer all of my photos#i have 0GB of storage left#so Google docs won't let me edit anything :((#and it's way harder to use tumblr or ao3 drafts to write on instead :(((((#pureshadow#eternal sugar cookie#pure vanilla cookie#shadow milk cookie#white lily cookie#URGH I NEED TO WRITE MORE ABOUT THEMM#i also have. so many strawberry crepe wips#they are my genius child <33#fanfiction writer#google docs
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Bread and Eggs
(NOT A PR0MPT)
******
It started with the ringing of Villain’s phone. He wasn’t surprised to see Hero’s name pop up. He admired the too-small circle with her picture on it. It was impossible to tell by looking at the emblem, but Villain knew it was a picture from their first date.
To think it had been five years ago...
Villain’s picture on Hero’s phone had been a more recent photo, one from their engagement. An image of him kneeling with the classic black velvety case. It was warm the day of their engagement- Villain didn’t dare propose on a cold day; it would have led to an obvious refusal.
He used to joke that warmth was the only reason Hero even liked him. “You scorn me constantly,” Villain would tease. “You only like me because of the heat I so generously produce.”
“As if you have any control over it! You can’t help that you’re so warm, but it is definitely a plus,” she would ultimately agree.
Now, they were married- and, oh, hadn’t it been a dream? Looking for homes, buying a home, getting groceries, coming home to one another, holding each other at the end of the day. It was all Villain wanted in life, and for so long, it seemed impossible. Yet, here they were; her joyful face was beaming at his under the name ‘Love of my life’.
Answering the phone, Villain jokingly began, “Yes, honey, I remembered to get the bread and eggs.”
The voice that answered wasn’t Hero’s.
***
#not a pr0mpt#this has been in my drafts for quite some time and Im thinking that I should perhaps post it at some point#that some point being now#Bread and Eggs#I'm so creative#Guess who is finally able to take classes again? How many of you knew I was out of classes for months?#None of ya. Because I never explained it.#Basically I was taking classes and then my university was absolutely horrible so I transferred.#After transferring I was able to take two classes before I realized my old school refused to cancel my financial aid which meant I couldn't#use it at my new school. Which meant I could no longer take classes. But I should be able to start Monday. If not Monday then in August :)#Anyway- that's your update from Dee covering the last couple of months in which I have been inactive#I have also been putting a lot of work into my manuscript. I'm just shy of 10k words right now and that's been on top of a lots of life stuf#okie bye! Sorry it's such a short- and relatively incomplete- snippet. I'll try to get something written up for you guys :)
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that’s fucking it im making a side blog (also editing to say that this post is giving pg13 so if that makes u uncomfy/if thats something u shouldn’t be reading then don’t click the “keep reading” option ok if u do i WILL find you)
i know i shouldn’t be embarrassed about having interests! that still doesn’t change the fact that i am. so here is the last time i will ever planet of the apes post on main:
i think it would be so cute for annie and zira to be pregnant at the same time. the repeated mentions of annie and finnick fucking nasty style was something i included bc 1) fucking nasty style?? in cages??? yeah, sounds about right coming from these two 2) yall can’t be surprised when we move onto the next installment of the series and annie is suddenly pregnant. like if anything it should be expected bc in any universe finnick’s pullout game is so weak
#anyway i’m so excited to have the snoopy theme back#i mean i still love my current layout but the snoopy one has a special place in my heart#sigh. on one hand i was adamant about never doing a side blog bc i was like i can NOT splinter my soul like that#on the other hand. i can’t keep pota posting like this. i have so many posts in my drafts that im simply too embarrassed to bring onto here#and on the third hand. it’s never that fucking serious. having a tumblr blog is not a soul thing and i need to stop looking at it that way#i am NOT a tortured poet#and on the bright side ill be transferring some of my annoyigness onto there so i wont be as insufferable on this blog#also 18+ mutuals do we agree w the last sentence#i feel like it would have to be mf got her pregnant during a WAR… like girl
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connection between "the poets are just kids who didn't make it" -> "I went to sleep a poet and I woke up a fraud" -> "I'll check in tomorrow if I don't wake up dead"
also a branch off there that ties Hand of God with TMOTM but that's actually a lyric comp I'm planning to make soon more than an actual note
#lftos essay#I'm just posting notes now. apparently. I'm trying to write out an outline rn skfnskngsk#EDIT the connection between hand of god and tmotm is the fraud/liar bit#hand of god is very eh whatever about it. hand to my heart gun to my head swear to God I'm through with this - I'm the worst liar I know#tmotm is CONCISE and DIRECT and SPECIFIC. I went to sleep a poet and I woke up a fraud#which. idk when tmotm was written exactly. patrick wanted it on the album proper instead of dark alley and champagne#but the song released in march 2006. I'm just saying that in a lot of ways hand of god feels like a draft almost#and MUCH of what it says both literally and thematically is transfered into tmotm#the contrast of the 2nd verse of hand of god vs the clarity and precision of ''went to sleep a poet and woke up a fraud'' ?#um.... hm. I won't conjecture#especially not on main. but....... I do have An Emotion about this ngl#ok that was just for my own notes ignore me. pencil in hand I'm just trying to make this work#moving on.
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I genuinely need a hug after the completely unnecessary panic I just went through cause I thought I couldn't upload my art here anymore 😭
#ok this is literally so stupid so I'm just gonna put it in the tags#I have a vpn on my computer and not my phone#and I'm used to uploading pictures by putting it in a draft or emailing it to myself#but tumblr is blocked and so is gmail (and google stuff in general)#so I tried making a yahoo email#but it wouldn't accept my phone number bc it's not local#then I tried multiple school emails that don't use google#outlook said fuck you and didn't accept them#tried messaging my brother about the vpn but my messages don't send here#tried using wechat but I got logged out and I don't remember my password#tried slack but that was stupid for like 500 reasons#tried bandapp but it uses a google login or a phone number#also don't remember my password on there#ok I swear I keep track of passwords now I made these accs at a different time#thought about resorting to my laptop's camera but realized I wasn't that desperate yet#was gonna use my mom's phone but her phone number isn't fixed yet either#apparently discord works? but I can't message myself and I don't have a single friend on there that I would send hazbin images to#a literal hour later#I realize. I realize my phone can transfer images directly to my computer. because i'm a fucking idiot.#anyway everything's fine now#I'm gonna go lie down and cry#velvet rambles
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i need you all to know i woke up to this blog being shadowbanned and i simply Screamed. But everything is fixed now Woo. sending you all the best day <3
#i'm telling you it's tashi tumblr doesn't like a girl boss :(#but hi i am not going to work till one today if at all? trying to get a test done and the rest of the drafts transfered#so memes and messages and all the fun will be happening soon#either before i leave in a bit or after i'm off WE'LL SEE BUT WOO#( OOC. )
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i really should post all my bkg drafts so i can finally move on 😞
#didn't write bc i thought he was dead lmfaooosoejkd#erm either bkg for my sis or that one shoto fic for a friend or that one alhaitham in my mlist LOLOLLOL#347 drafts and counting bc i haven't transfer my docs 🥰
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y'know, if tumblr ever dies I'm screwed because the amount of times i have used the drafts feature to get a photo, link, or something else from my ipad to my phone, or my phone to my computer, or computer to ipad etc and so forth is astonishing
#i don't have an iphone or a mac so i can't airdrop shit to myself#and i can't text my ipad#and i can't be arsed to find a cord to do transfers to my computer so#my drafts are a mess because of this lmaooo#it's almost as deranged as my notes app
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criminal minds // the autobiography of my mother, jamaica kincaid
#coughs so loudly that i break the sound barrier. hi.#this is ABOUT spencer and gideon by the WAY#anyways the dreams scene was sooooooo like. i could write a whole paper on it my god.#and the transference of paternal love thats a shade teww weird that u could almost call it romantic...#criminal minds#words#mine#this has been sitting in the drafts since october....what was i on when i made this...my god..#that criminal minds rewatch (for the fifth time) was hashtag crazy.....
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