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meg-moira · 4 years ago

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The Witch Who Spoke to the Wind

Sequel to Eindred and the Witch

In which Severin, the golden eyed witch, learns that his greatest enemy and truest love is fated to kill him.

Dealing in prophecies is a dubious work. Anyone who knows anything will tell you as much.

“Think of all of time as a grand tapestry,” his great-grandmother had said, elbow deep in scalding water. Her hands were tomato red, and Severin watched with wide golden eyes as she kneaded and stretched pale curds in the basin. “You might be so privileged to understand a single weave, but unless you go following all surrounding threads, and the threads around those threads, and so on - which, mind you, no human can do - you’ll never understand the picture.”

Severin, who was ten years old and had never seen a grand tapestry, looked at the cheese in the basin and asked if his great-grandmother could make the analogy about that instead.

“No,” she replied. “Time is a tapestry. Cheese is just cheese.”

And that was that.

By fifteen, Severin who was all arms, legs, and untamable black hair, decided he hated prophecies more than anything in the world. He occupied himself instead with long walks atop the white bluffs well beyond his family’s home. Outside, he could look at birds, and talk to the wind, and not think about the terrible prophecy which followed him like a shadow.

His second eldest sister had revealed it - accidentally, of course. Severin lived in a warm and bustling house with his great-grandmother, grandmother, mother, two aunts, and three sisters. All of whom were generously gifted in the art of foretelling (a messy business, each would say if asked), and every one of them had seen Severin’s same bleak thread.

He would die. Willingly stabbed through the heart by his greatest enemy and truest love.

Willingly. That was the worst part, he thought.

Severin, who had no talent in the way of prophecies, but plenty of talent in the realm of wind and sky, marched along the well-worn trail, static sparking around his fingertips as the brackish sea breeze nipped consolingly at his face and hair.

I will protect you if you ask me to, it blustered, and Severin was comforted.

He didn’t care who this foretold stranger was. When this enemy-lover appeared, Severin would ask the wind to pick them up and take them far, far away. Far enough that they could never harm him. The wind whistled in agreement. And so it was settled.

At seventeen, he was still all arms and legs, though his eldest sister had managed to tame his hair with a respectably sharp pair of shears. The wind, who had delighted in playing with his wild, tangled locks, did not thank her for it. Severin did thank her; in fact, he’d asked her to do it. He was of the opinion that his newly shorn hair made him look older - more sophisticated. And he left his family home with a new cloak draping his shoulders and a knotted wooden walking stick in hand, thinking himself very nearly a man. He was far from it, of course. But there was no telling him that.

He set out on a clear, cool morning to find his own way in the world, and was prepared to thoroughly deal with anyone who so much as dared to act ever so slightly in the manner of enemy or lover.

He discovered, soon enough, that this was not a practical attitude to take when venturing into the world. Severin spent his first months away from home making little in the way of friends and plenty in the way of thoroughly baffled enemies.

When you meet his gaze, you’ll know, the wind chided as it whisked in and out of his hood.

“His?” Severin said aloud, lifting a single dark brow. “Do you know something I don’t?”

The wind whistled noncommittally in answer.

The wind did know something, as it turned out. At twenty, Severin stood on the warm, sun-loved planks of a dock. As gulls cried overhead, he pressed his fingers to his lips. The young sailor had touched his lips to Severin’s in a swift, carefree kiss before departing on the sea. And though the feeling was pleasant enough, Severin knew that his enemy-lover was not on the great ship cleaving a path through the cerulean waves.

“When I meet his gaze, I’ll know,” Severin said, golden eyes sweeping the horizon. The seaward breeze blustered in such agreement that the gulls overhead cried out in alarm.

What will you do? The wind asked, delighting in whipping the gulls into a proper frenzy.

“Get rid of him, of course,” Severin replied.

What if you don’t want to?

Severin thought that was the stupidest question he’d ever heard. “He’s going to stab me through the heart. Why in the world wouldn’t I want to get rid of him?”

People are foolish, the wind answered, shrugging the nearby sails.

“Not me.” Severin leaned on his stick and looked out at the sea. “I won’t let anyone get away with stabbing my heart.”

When he was twenty-two, Severin knelt at the bedside of a withered, wilting woman. She was a stranger, but the town’s herb witch was away, and Severin happened to be passing through. Though his true strength would always remain with the wind and the sky, the youngest of Severin’s two aunts had a special way with plants, and she’d taught him a fair bit about the many healing properties of the region’s hardy, windblown flora.

He boiled water, adding the few herbs he carried to make a rejuvenating tea. He helped the woman drink, his hand supporting her head and fingers tangling in her sweat drenched hair. After, he pressed a cool cloth to her head, and in the half dark room, she murmured, sharing delirious fears that she would accidentally speak cruel dying words and lay a curse upon him.

Kindly stroking her forehead, Severin assured her that he was not afraid of curses. Even uttered by the dying, a true curse was rarer than the superstitious soldier’s and barbarians liked to believe. Besides, she wasn’t going to die. Severin, who’d seen just enough of the world to have a taste of wisdom, was certain he could save her.

She died within the day.

Whether her condition had been beyond help, or Severin lacked the skills to twist the herbs to his bidding, he would never know. The wind rustled reassurances through the sparsely-leaved trees, but Severin was beyond consolation. Clouds gathered on the horizon, and by nightfall, great branches of lightning crackled across the sky.

He spent the next year and a half in the wilds. Beneath the jubilant light of the sun, he collected plants, acquainting himself with the earth. And beneath the soft, watchful light of the moon, he whispered to the wind and dared to wonder at the shape of his enemy-lover’s face. He could never seem to summon the slightest picture in his mind. Though it really didn’t matter, he supposed. Their eyes would meet, and Severin would know. And then he’d use all of the power at his disposal to send his enemy-lover away.

During this time, Severin sometimes saw bands of barbaric warriors crossing the plains. He kept his distance, but he doubted any of them were interested in either recruiting or killing a scrawny young man in a worn woolen cloak. Few he encountered ever suspected he had any great abilities, and Severin certainly didn’t go out of his way to advertise the fact that he could command the wind and sky when he wished. The barbaric companies had their eyes on more obviously lucrative targets, anyway. A handful of city states which spread across the great peninsula were openly at war with the barbaric tribes from the north.

It was when Severin was returning from his self-imposed isolation that he had his first real encounter with war. He held his sturdy walking stick in hand and carried a bursting bag of herbs, poultices, and leather-bound journals over his shoulder. Severin was so surprised by the sudden, brutal clash of metal and the primal cries that erupted nearby that he halted where he stood. His curiosity both outweighed and outlasted his fear, and after a minute or two of tense consideration, he pressed cautiously onward in the direction of the noise.

By the time he arrived, the battle was done.

It had surely been an ugly, bloody affair, if the splayed out bodies of the city soldiers and barbaric warriors were anything to judge it by. Holding a hand over his mouth, Severin gingerly navigated the carnage and valiantly resisted the impulse to be sick right there in the field. He was nearly on the other side of it when movement caught his eye. Squinting, almost afraid to look, he glanced from the corners of his eyes, sure that it was some grotesque remnant of warfare which awaited him.

Instead, it was a man.

Just a man.

The movement Severin had spotted was the rise and fall of his chest.

Only after turning a careful look around the terrible and silent battlefield did Severin approach the fallen man.

The barbarian’s eyes were closed and his pale brows drew together, as if reflecting pain. His face would probably have been handsome in a rough, simple sort of way if it weren’t smeared in dirt and blood. His light hair, braided and pulled away from his face, was bloodied as well, and Severin frowned at the sorry state of him. After a second wary look around, he knelt with a sigh.

The barbarian’s leather vest was cut, and his thick, scarred arms had earned several new slices as well. Severin, who had more than enough herbs and poultices on hand, reluctantly tore his only spare shirt into bandages. Within the hour the stranger was fully bandaged and muttering in fever addled sleep.

“Don’t worry,” Severin murmured, knotting the last makeshift bandage. “I’ve learned enough from the plants and trees to save you from both fever and infection.”

Behind closed lids, the barbarian’s eyes flitted anxiously to and fro and he mumbled something that sounded like no. Nose wrinkling, Severin leaned in. He heard the sleeping barbarian say, his voice low and cracking, “The curses will take me.”

Severin frowned down at him, unimpressed. “No they won’t,” he snapped, and yanked the bandage tighter.

The barbarian silenced then, and Severin stared at him a moment longer, pursing his lips in consternation. It wasn’t that he minded using his supplies to heal a stranger. But a part of him worried that healing a warrior made Severin responsible for whatever slaughter he resumed when he rose.

Severin abhorred warfare. It was such a terrible waste. But he supposed there was no helping what he’d already done. The barbarian was already on his way to recovery, and Severin certainly wasn’t going to murder him in his sleep. He reached out, intending to test the temperature at the man’s temple, but no sooner had Severin’s fingers touched his overheated skin than the world bled around him. In its place: a vision.

Shock echoed through him, because he was not like the women in his family, able to see phantoms in time. He’d always simply played with the air. The vision dancing before his gaze, however, didn’t seem to care.

Like droplets of ink spreading in water, a prism of colors twisted, threading together into nearly tangible shapes. From the chaos, rose a blond child holding a knit sheep. He was ruddy cheeked and pouting up at his mother. Then ink and water swirled and the images collapsed and shifted. Hulking shadows loomed over the child. The mother wailed her grief. The formless ink shivered, morphing from one scene to the next, nearly too quickly to follow, and Severin was swallowed up in it, overrun and overwhelmed by violence, blood, and pain. Beneath his fingers, Severin felt the movement of shifting, slipping thread.

Just as abruptly as it had started, the vision ceased. Severin’s knees ached where they pressed against the dirt and the barbarian’s skin beneath his hand was no longer overheated. How long had he been within the vision’s grasp, he wondered?

As Severin shifted back, the barbarian groaned. Severin watched as the man’s eyelids fluttered - and at once, the air turned heavy, as if the wind had drawn and held an anticipatory breath.

Dread flooded Severin and he rushed to stand. The barbarian had not yet opened his eyes, and Severin knew with a terrible nameless certainty that he must not be here when this man awoke. Severin could still feel those elusive, unknowable threads beneath his fingers, and his hands shook as he rose. Awakened by his urgency, the wind roared, lending him speed as he fled the clearing.

By the time the barbarian cracked open a single, world weary eye, Severin was long gone, heart still safely beating in his chest.

Severin endeavored to forget about the barbarian. He convinced himself that the vision had been the hallucination of an overexerted body, and that the sensation of inexorably moving threads beneath his fingers was nothing more than a flight of fancy. Severin did not think about how the threads had felt - certain and unyielding - beneath his fragile, very mortal hands. If he did, he feared he might ask the wind to whisk him away from the world altogether, and that, surely, was no way to live.

In a deep, secret place, however, Severin suspected the reason he was granted such a vision was because the stranger’s thread was woven perilously close to his own. Because of this, he set upon an easterly road, endeavoring to put a healthy distance between himself and the pale barbarian.

After nearly a month of travel, he arrived in a small village which sat nestled in foothills, tucked beneath the shadows of great mountains which stood like sentinels above. Severin hadn’t intended to stay, but when it was discovered he had some skill with plants and medicine, the villagers eagerly led him to a hut some distance from the village. It was empty, they explained, and had been for some years. A healing woman had occupied it, some years back, before she’d passed on. The villagers had been saving it, hoping the space would be enough to entice a new healer to make their isolated village a home.

Severin had nowhere else to go, and he supposed a distant, mountain village was as good a place as any to avoid a blade to the heart.

Two years passed, and Severin settled into his little hut. He spent his mornings taking long walks around the surrounding lands, collecting herbs and specimens. Returning home, he’d throw open the windows to allow his friend the wind a brief but wild rampage through the hut. With the air freshened, Severin spread plants across his square dining table and sorted them into jars to be sealed, dried, or preserved in vinegar. His neighbors in the village visited frequently, just as often for his company as for his medicines, and Severin delighted in visiting the town on market days and making the streamers dance in the wind for the children. Evenings were spent in his rocking chair, with a book in his lap and his feet pressed near to the low fire in the hearth.

He was happy, and hardly thought of the barbarian he’d found bleeding in the dirt. That is, until fate caught up with him.

One day, when he was foraging for moss on the hillside behind his hut, Severin felt the whisper-soft touch of thread against his palm. He sat upright at once, and turning and craning his neck, he absently rubbed his palms against his robes.

A company marched into the village. From up on Severin’s hill, they appeared a swarm of ants overtaking the miniature thatched roof homes. The slipping, shivering feeling beneath Severin’s palm intensified, and he stood. His heart drummed a frantic beat against his ribs, and Severin felt with a terrible certainty that fate, like a hunting hound on the scent, had sniffed him out at last.

When Severin called out, begging the wind’s help, it rushed to him, howling atop the hill.

I am here. I am here.

Cradled in the gale, he begged the wind to take him and hide him away, so that the tapestry’s relentless threads might cease dragging him toward the one he never wished to meet.

So be it, the wind said. If that is truly what you wish, I will take you and hide you away forever.

In that moment, nearly caught as he was, Severin was willing to do anything to avoid meeting this man who would kill him - until the screams rose from the pastures in the valley beneath his hut. Severin’s heartbeat was in his throat, on his very tongue, as he held up a hand to stay the wind.

“Just a moment,” he murmured, and turned bright, pained eyes toward the village. The terrified screams of his neighbors pierced him as surely as any blade, and with a mournful twist of his fingers, he bade the wind disperse.

By the time he reached in the pastures, the shepherd, the blacksmith, and Helvia’s two sons lay dead. At the sight of his friend’s bodies, grief and rage stirred within Severin, and the wind, always nearby to him, trembled in sympathy. Gaze sweeping the warriors, he marked the five whose weapons were stained red. Severin was not violent by nature, but if he was to die this day, he resolved to remove from the earth at least these five men, who with bloodied blades, uncaringly spoke of feasting upon the village’s few precious sheep.

When the warriors turned and finally noticed Severin, he lifted his chin and prayed his voice did not betray his fear. “These are simple people. They have little in way of money or goods. It wasn’t for nothing that the shepherd, blacksmith, and teenagers died. They need these sheep. And I cannot allow you to take them.”

The men glanced at one another, eyes filling with a cruel sort of mirth. They laughed at him, and Severin steeled himself for what must come next. He was friends with the wind, but to call down the heavens was an entirely more serious matter. And he’d never done it. At least, not like this.

Severin turned his palms up and glared at the heavens, daring them to refuse him now when he needed them most.

For a long, terrible moment, nothing happened.

And then, the skies erupted.

He had never felt pure, visceral power in such a way, and as it whined and crackled, Severin, with splayed fingers, used all of his strength to tear the lightning from its home in the sky. It rained upon the warriors, screaming in wild, untamable fury. Severin watched the men cry out in agony, and he felt horror and satisfaction in equal measure.

When a single figure broke from the group, agile enough to evade the lightning and charge across the field, Severin could only look on in exhausted realization. It was the pale barbarian. The man from the battlefield. The child in the vision.

The barbarian charged like a beast, his thickly braided hair bouncing. His brows were drawn down in focus and his lips poised on the precipice of a snarl. It was with a hopeless sense of finality that Severin met the stranger’s gaze.

He met eyes of icy gray, the color of hazy, snow capped mountains in winter, and Severin knew, he knew with a certainty that was sunken into his bones and twisted in his marrow, that this barbarian was the shadow which had haunted him. And he knew, more than anything, the crude blade in the man’s scarred-knuckle hand was fate’s exclamation point at the end of Severin’s ephemeral existence.

Watching as the barbarian pivoted, drawing back his blade, Severin only wished he understood why the women in his family had persisted in calling this man Severin’s truest love. If this was love, the man had a spectacularly terrible way of showing it.

Time slowed to a crawl, and sunlight flashed, reflecting off the blade. As the jagged edge touched the fabric of Severin’s robe, the wind whispered at his ear. Let me show you a piece of the picture.

The wind around him froze, and so too did the world.

Look up, said the wind, a rustle within his ear.

Severin did.

The complexly woven image was shaped by currents in the air - all but invisible to any whose eyes are untrained to look for them. But Severin had a born understanding of the wind and sky, and when he looked up, he saw bits and pieces of an impossibly complex tapestry.

He saw scarred knuckles gently shaping wood. A small child that sat upon broad shoulders. Rocking chairs placed side by side before a glowing fire. Warm hands enveloping his own. Safety. Home.

It was...everything, and Severin’s heart ached with a strange and complex longing for a future that surely could never be.

It’s not impossible, the wind whispered. But the threads will have to tangle and untangle just perfectly so.

“How?” Severin asked, and wondered if he was a fool to feel so desperate a pull towards this life glimpsed in impressions and half images.

The warrior must weep and repent. And a curse must come to fruition.

“And if these things do not happen?”

Then your soul will fade from the earth.

Severin felt torn in two.

The blade has not yet struck your heart, the wind murmured, kind and conspiratorial. There is time still for me to secret you away. I could pull your thread from the tapestry altogether.

“But there would be no hope for that life,” Severin said with a last wistful glance at the scattered mosaic above.

No, none, the wind agreed.

“Okay,” Severin whispered, “okay.” And it felt terrifyingly like surrender.

The wind stirred, and a breeze like a kiss tousled his dark hair.

The blade struck.

It was an intense pressure and then swift, vibrantly blooming pain. Severin wavered on his feet, and looked up. For the second time, he met the warrior’s gaze. And Severin saw and understood that there was no malice in those wintry eyes. Not even frustration or anger. But, instead, an exhaustion deeper than Severin could conceive.

When Severin toppled backward, it was concerning to realize he could no longer feel the grass beneath his body. The man knelt down, and Severin blinked tiredly up at him.

It seemed as though the man were waiting for something. Severin’s slipping mind struggled to think of what - until he recalled the dying woman and her talk of curses. And hadn’t the barbarian said something about curses when he was fever addled and hurt? What had the wind said? Severin was struggling to remember. As his life trickled away in red rivulets which stained the grass and soil, he thought of the boy in the vision - lost and afraid. And he thought of the man he’d become, kneeling stonily over him.

And Severin knew exactly which words should be his last.

Swallowing, he mustered the strength to whisper, “-my hut…it’s just past…the next hill over. In it, I keep medicines and herbs. For the villagers. And travelers who pass.”

For the barbarian would have to stay if he were ever to show remorse. He couldn’t very well continue going about fighting and murdering his way across the peninsula. Which brought Severin to his final words. It took all of his remaining strength to lift his hand. When he reached out, the barbarian startled, as though he expected more lightning to spring forth from Severin’s fingers. But Severin merely tapped his chest and smiled. “May you live a life of safety and peace.”

It was a fitting curse, he thought, feeling particularly clever. And there, on the field, surrounded by sheep, Severin’s heart stuttered and stopped.

It was an abrupt, slipping sensation, like losing your footing on iced over earth. Raw existence rushed around Severin, and he was battered and blown about, like a banner torn loose in the storm. This continued for a dizzying moment, or perhaps a dizzying eternity - Severin really had no way of knowing which. But it stopped when a familiar presence surged around him, blowing and blustering until the wild chaos of existence was forced to let him be.

The wind could not protect him forever, Severin knew, and so he focused his energies until, like a wind sprite, he swirled about the hillside. Below him, he saw the barbarian, his great head bent. Severin, as incorporeal as a breeze, could not resist blustering over the barbarian’s shoulder and observing himself, limp and pitiful in death. Whipping around, he beheld the barbarian - because surely this sight would bring him at least to the verge of tears.

The barbarian frowned down at Severin’s body and rubbed a scarred hand over the patches of stubble on his chin. And then he rose with a great sigh and set off down the hillside, away from Severin and the village.

Severin, who was nothing more than wind and spirit, watched him and despaired. He could do nothing more than whip and howl through the hills as his murderer left him without a backward glance.

Months passed.

Severin did not follow after the barbarian. What good would it do? In this form, it wasn’t as though Severin could speak to him. And if he was doomed to fade and dissolve from existence, he would much rather do so here in the hills he loved than in some strange land trailing after an even stranger man. The wind kept him company, at least, and Severin spent his days whistling through the black, porous stones at the base of the mountains and blowing bits of dandelions across wild tufts of grass.

One day, long after Severin had begun to feel more spread out and thin than was entirely comfortable, the wind rushed to him, carrying with it the scent of dust and dirt and faraway lands.

The barbarian had returned.

Severin was an icy breeze that whipped around the edges of town, and he watched with cool distrust as the man trudged through the streets. His shoulders were slumped and his blond head was turned down. He looked utterly defeated, and any sympathy Severin might have felt was eclipsed by petty spite. He didn’t hold any of the pettiness against himself, though. He was dead, and therefore felt he’d earned at least a little pettiness.

When the barbarian crossed the field, stopping to stand before the place where Severin had fallen, Severin swirled around him, newly curious. The man didn’t look grief stricken, but his face was difficult to read. There were dark shadows beneath his eyes and lines of exhaustion around his mouth. Mostly, Severin thought he just looked tired.

When the man approached Severin’s home after having ignored the invitation for months, Severin had a second moment of pettiness and whipped the wind up on the other side of the door, sealing it closed as the barbarian tried to open it. Only when the man shoved it with his great, muscled shoulder did Severin retreat, allowing the door to swing open.

It was with a strange sort of melancholy that he watched the barbarian’s silver gaze sweep over the room. The man looked first at the damp, unkempt hearth before slowly making his way across the room. He glanced from Severin’s well-loved walking stick to the bookshelf built into the wall. He fumblingly ran the backs of his fingers along the spines of the books, as if he was unlearned in the ways of a gentle touch.

Severin was still very much put out about the whole being dead business, but as he watched the barbarian’s almost reverent inspection, he unthinkingly twisted the air in the room, drawing out the cold and pulling in a bit of sun warmed breeze.

By the second day, the man was sitting in Severin’s chair. Severin stewed, swatting at floating dust by the window as his killer rocked to and fro in Severin’s favorite seat. Later, the barbarian stood, stretching his strong arms overhead and twisted his back experimentally. Brows lifting in pleasant surprise, he gave the chair an appreciative pat.

By the third day, Severin had no more dust to swat about. The barbarian had rolled up his ragged sleeves and set about scrubbing every inch of Severin’s little hut. When the hulking man worked open the stiff windows, the wind rushed in, delighting in whipping about the space once more.

He’s done a better job of cleaning than you ever did, the wind sang, slipping once more outside.

He was dead and that meant the wind had to be nice, and Severin told it as much. It’s reply was a soft rustling of chimes that hung from the house’s eaves, and the sound was almost like laughter.

Days passed, and the man began reading Severin’s books. This was probably the most surprising development yet, in Severin’s opinion. It wasn’t that he hadn’t thought the large, scarred warrior capable of reading, just - well, he hadn’t thought the large, scarred warrior capable of reading particularly well. But the man seemed to be doing just fine, and sat in Severin’s rocking chair, putting a far greater strain on the sturdy wood than Severin ever had, as he thumbed carefully through the book’s smooth pages.

When little Mykela took ill, Severin knew it well before anyone else. He’d taken a spin through town and as he rode the wintry wind past where she played in the yard, he’d felt the rattle of air in her lungs. But at this point, Severin was little more than a memory on the breeze, and though his worry was agony, he could do absolutely nothing. He spent the rest of the day roaring about the mountain peaks, sending snow flurries spilling down the far side of the cliffs.

Two days later, Severin was idly observing the barbarian, watching the crease between his brows twitch as he slept, when a great pounding broke out against the door. The barbarian rose at once, and Severin watched him cast a brief glance at the walking stick before turning instead to the candle on a nearby shelf. With warm light cupped in his palm, the barbarian approached the door.

When Dormund, Mykela’s father, entered the hut, carrying a limp mound of blankets, Severin felt a spike of icy terror. As the barbarian poked and prodded the fire, Severin carefully stirred the wind to better feed the flames. Severin would have shouted instructions, had he lungs to shout, but the barbarian already had two jars in hand. He held them up, looking a little lost, before he hurried to the bookshelf and selected a thick book. Muttering under his breath, he flipped hurriedly through pages until he found what he was looking for. And then he was kneeling before the pot of water he’d set over the fire, and Severin watched as he scooped careful measurements of Severin’s dried herbs into the roiling water.

Mykela was saved, and as the barbarian sent the girl and her father off with a bag of herbs, it occurred to Severin that he wished to know the barbarian’s name. He wouldn’t learn it until two days later, when Old Cara arrived at the hut, seeking the barbarian’s help for her arthritic knee. After supplying her with the appropriate poultice, the barbarian helped her to the door, and looking up, she patted his shoulder and asked him his name.

Eindred, was his answer.

Eindred.

Severin wished he had lips to test the shape of the name.

Months passed, and was easier now to watch Eindred move about Severin’s hut. In fact, Severin had even begun to enjoy riding the soft breeze from the windows as it wafted around Eindred’s shoulders, curiously observing whatever small thing he happened to, at any given time, be doing with his hands. One day, Severin was surprised to find Eindred’s hands at work, deliberately whittling the curved back of a rocking chair. When the chair was done, Eindred set it carefully, almost reverently beside the first. At the sight, Severin had a bright, nearly overwhelming flash of recognition, and he thought of the image the wind had shown him - of the rocking chairs before a warm, crackling fire.

Severin was fading, he could feel it. To hope was to court a greater disappointment than Severin could rightly comprehend, and yet - he watched Eindred set out with Severin’s walking stick to join the festival, and saw when Mykela took his hand. The barbarian’s stony expression softened, then melted as the girl tugged him after her.

It was the strangest of sensations, because while Severin didn’t strictly have a heart these days, watching the great Eindred meekly follow little Mykela made something in Severin’s incorporeal being ache with unexpected warmth.

Whatsmore, Eindred had been reading Severin’s journals and he would sometimes stop and stare about the hut, as if trying to picture the ghost of Severin’s life there. Once, Eindred draped a thick blanket over the back of one of the rocking chairs and ran his rough hands over it as he frowned contemplatively into the fire.

Summer had come and gone and Severin feared that parts of his soul had already begun to slip into that other-place. And so, with a tender sort of weariness, he drifted on the sunbeams cutting through the clean window glass, and watched with only mild annoyance as Eindred carefully tore a blank page from one of Severin’s journals.

Lips pressing together in focus, Eindred wrote in with small, precise letters, what appeared to be a list.

Confused, Severin drifted closer.

May your every loved one die screaming in pain.

I hope you die with your eyes stabbed out and your heart in your hands.

You will never know happiness.

Your existence will be suffering.

It was a list of curses, Severin realized. Morbid curses, by the looks of it. The last two, however, caught his attention.

May your greatest enemy rise from the grave and never leave you alone.

And,

May you live a life of safety and peace.

And Severin understood.

When Eindred set out from the hut, looking drawn but resolved, Severin began at once to gather his energy. It had been nearly a year since his death, and he feared that there might not be enough of him left to make a return. The second to last curse would help things along, but Severin knew it would be a mistake to rely on it.

And so, as Eindred entered the village, Severin stretched upward and out, calling wind and storm clouds with reckless, hopeful abandon. For his entire life, Severin had lived, certain in the knowledge that love and happiness were not meant for one such as he. How could they be? When a blade was foretold to make a home in his heart?

But Eindred had changed. And the patchwork pieces of tapestry were there, a life Severin had never dared to dream of, right there - if he could only summon the strength to reach out and grasp it.

Below, Eindred bowed his head before the townsfolk, confessing his part in the tragedy which played out on their soil. Above, Severin swallowed the skies and became the storm.

Severin felt it, distantly below, when the people in the village forgave Eindred. And he felt when Eindred’s bittersweet tears tickled the earth. He felt Eindred return to the hut, and then after pacing restlessly about, return at last to the pastures where it had all begun.

And then came Eindred’s pained voice, calling out from the fields below. “Severin!”

Eindred had never said his name before, and Severin, who was the clouds and the wind and the rain and the sky, rumbled his joy at the sound of it.

“It was my hand which ended your life,” Eindred continued. His deep voice was shaking. “And with your dying breath you gifted what I thought was a nightmare. Did you know that it would turn out to be a dream? I think you did.”

Just wait, Severin wanted to tell him, because he’d seen a future better still. The only question that remained was whether he had strength enough to reach it.

Rugged face upturned, Eindred called to Severin and the sky, which were one and the same. “Though it’s a dream, I’ll never know peace. How can I? When I live in the home of the one I so coldly murdered? I would leave, but the villagers have my heart - as they had yours. In this state, I don’t think I’ll ever truly know true rest or true peace - despite the great power of your curse.”

You will, Severin said, and lightning streaked across the sky. I will.

“Even now,” Eindred said, through wind and rain, “I’m not sure if you are my greatest enemy or ally.”

There it was.

His greatest enemy.

Severin, with every ounce of power he possessed, claimed the title. For he was the greatest enemy the old Eindred, warrior and killer, had faced. With his parting curse, Severin had forced the old Eindred to do the one thing he’d feared most of all: to live and face all he’d done.

Severin felt a rushing, coursing energy thrumming within and without and he knew that he must catch it and hold it, though he wasn’t sure how.

The tapestry threads, the wind whispered. Severin had spread so thin, his old friend was nearly a part of him now.

Severin listened, and felt for that thread which had teased and tickled his palm. And when he was sure he felt it, he wrapped himself around it and pulled. The sky around him screamed as he dragged himself forward toward something - something -

White light was all around him, and then it wasn’t. The air was cool and damp, and the evening sang with the wind’s gleeful gusts and the soft patter of rain on grass. Severin lifted a hand, and looked it over in tentatively blooming relief. Pressing the hand over his heart which beat with a strong, steady rhythm, Severin breathed a relieved, ragged sigh.

Eindred stood in the field, turned away from him. Drawing in a breath, Severin delighted in the sound of his own voice. “May your greatest enemy rise from the grave, Eindred, and never leave you alone.” He smiled as he spoke, and very nearly pressed his fingers to his lips to feel the shape they took when saying Eindred’s name.

Eindred turned. “So you are my greatest enemy then?” He sounded wary.

“I don’t think it’s so simple as that. Do you?”

Eindred’s expression shifted and he shook his head. When he next spoke, it was soft and fumbling, as if he still hadn’t fully adjusted to a world which was kind. “I made a chair,” he blurted out. “A few actually,” he added, rubbing a hand over the back of his head.

Severin wanted to say, I know. I saw. But that would require more explanation than he cared to give at the moment, so instead, he replied, “Do I get the new rocking chair or my old one?”

“Any,” Eindred stammered, “Either. Both?” He looked at Severin, and the earnest weight of his gaze held the promise of all the chairs Severin could want and anything else Eindred could possibly make with his scarred hands.

The fondness that bubbled up within Severin was so abrupt and filled him so thoroughly that he wanted to laugh with it. “Lucky for you, I only need one chair. You can keep the old one if you like it. I trust your craftsmanship.”

Severin turned then, because it was cold and every part of him felt so entirely bright and buoyant that he thought he might die if he didn’t move. However, when he realized Eindred was not following, he stopped. “Well? Are you coming?”

Eindred looked up, as if he’d been startled. “Where?” he called.

Standing there, sodden in the field, Eindred looked after Severin, as if he was afraid to hope - as Severin once had been afraid to do. And it occurred to Severin that Eindred would need to hear it said aloud.

“Home, of course. Where else?”

“Home,” Eindred repeated, as if confirming it to himself.

And when Severin turned again towards home, Eindred followed.

By the time they reached the hut, both were shivering from the cold, and as they crossed the threshold into the warm space, Severin swayed on his feet. He’d almost forgotten the immense power he’d used, and now the harsh ringing in his ears was a stark reminder. Warm, rough hands steadied him and when Severin tilted his head up, he saw that Eindred wore an expression of poorly concealed terror.

“I’m not going to die all over again,” Severin assured him. “I just used a lot of magic.” As he said it, he swayed once more, this time falling forward.

Eindred caught Severin again, one arm wrapped around his back and his other hand braced against his chest. Beneath where Eindred’s palm pressed, Severin’s heart thrummed. And Severin watched, curious, as Eindred’s expression twisted. He no longer claimed the title of warrior, Severin knew, but it was nonetheless with a warrior’s gravity that Eindred met Severin’s gaze.

“These hands will never again harm you. I swear it.”

“I know,” Severin replied, and pressed a hand over the back of Eindred’s rough knuckles. “Help me to a chair?”

Eindred did, and helped to remove Severin’s thick outer robe before Severin sank gratefully in front of the fire. Eindred left him a moment, and Severin closed his eyes.

He intended to just rest them for a second - maybe two, but when Severin next opened his eyes, the room was darker and he was draped and bundled in blankets, softer and thicker than any he recalled owning. The fire was still crackling, and the warm light made soothing shadows dance across the hut’s wooden floor. The other chair was occupied, Severin realized, and he watched as the hearth’s orange light played across Eindred’s sleeping features. Compared to Severin’s mountain of blankets, he had just one draped over his lap, though he didn’t seem cold. Nonetheless, Severin shifted a bit, and peeled a soft fleece blanket off his own pile to toss it onto him. The blanket fell short, and with a quick whispered word, the wind slipped under the door and flipped the offending blanket up onto Eindred’s chest.

“That’s better,” Severin said.

The wind played a little with the fire before tousling Severin’s hair and departing with a sibilant, save your strength foolish human. You’re still recovering, and slipped out the way it had come.

When Severin turned back to Eindred, he saw the large man was sitting up and his eyes were now open. Blinking, Eindred rubbed a hand over his face and then, stiffening in sudden shock, he whipped to look at Severin. Heaving a great sigh, he rocked back in the chair. “Still breathing,” he said.

“I don’t plan on stopping.”

Something almost like a smile twitched at Eindred’s lips and Severin was enchanted by it.

“You were dead and now you’re alive. Forgive me. I’m still trying to wrap my head around it.”

“You’re the one who believes in silly curses.”

Eindred’s brows rose. “Silly? Says the one who was brought back from the dead by one.”

Severin waved a dismissive hand. “The curse might have set the stage, but I was director, crew, and cast.”

And there was another smile, like a glimpse of sun between clouds. Severin was beginning to fear there might be no practical limit to the lengths he’d be willing to go to see another smile.

“I’ll take your word for it,” Eindred replied. “I get the feeling you know a great deal more about the world and magics than I.”

“Well Eindred,” Severin said, scooting his chair a little closer to both Eindred and the fire. “What do you know of grand tapestries?”

Eindred, looking more than a little lost, shook his head. “Nothing. I don’t know that I’ve ever seen one.”

“Well,” Severin said, and grinned. “What do you know of cheese?”

EDIT: A novel based on Eindred and the Witch and The Witch Who Spoke to the Wind is in progress! I will post news about it on my Tumblr and my Patreon as news becomes available :)

#my writing #original writing #my story #Eindred and the Witch #original story #fantasy #fantasy story #love story #eindred the warrior #severin the witch #writing #writeblr #short story #long short story #7000+ words #fantasy short story #amwriting #story

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tobiosmilktea · 4 years ago

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hiii can i request tsumu, kenma, oikawa, and kuroo where they’re in a secret relationship and the reader feels like they’re hiding her bc they’re ashamed of her ? like a hurt too comfort type of thing? thank u bb 🥺🥺

- 🍒

secret relationships w/ atsumu, kenma, oikawa, and kuroo

a/n: i have so many angst requests,, yall must like getting hurt 💀 also this wasn’t as angsty as i thought it was gonna be since im going through writers block yet again and i can not handle pain rn (also not proofread, so read with caution lmao)

— m. atsumu

it honestly surprised you at first, the way someone like miya atsumu returning your feelings the moment you told him you liked him near the start of the school year

there wasn’t that instant gratification though, knowing that one of inarizaki’s golden boys still felt out of your reach

despite being in a relationship with you, it wasn’t like anyone knew of it besides osamu and your closest friend

of course you didn’t really mind as you’ve always thought couples who were obnoxious with their relationships 24/7 and constantly making out in the hallways wasn’t your cup of tea either, so you get why atsumu wanted to keep it a secret

besides, with a guy so popular like him, you really just thought he was sparing you from the harassment (not that it would be bad if all the girls crushing on him new)

you get that he was just trying to protect you, and yet the more you thought of it, the more than it was simply just an assumption and you really didn’t know why your relationship was kept secret

it wasn’t like either of you would get backlash in any way, so what was the problem?

you weren’t exactly the type to be the most insecure either

sure, you were aware of the flaws you had, but it wasn’t something you were ashamed of as you learned to get used to it

yet it’s hard to fully love yourself when your boyfriend isn’t even comfortable with the fact that no one knows you two are even together

you hated jumping to conclusions, but you couldn’t help but to think the worst case scenario—was he ashamed of being with you?

you honestly thought the idea was impossible

if he was seriously ashamed of the thought of being with you in public, why would he even waste all those months dating? were all those dates and nights sneaking out to see each other for nothing?

it was like this for weeks with the way your own thoughts sabotaged you as you stood next to him during lunch

in moments like this in school, surrounded by your classmates and acquaintances, you and atsumu were only friends who sat next to each other occasionally and shared conversations that only friends would have

only friends

god, you hated the way that atsumu wouldn’t even look at you the way that he would when you two are alone

was he that embarrassed to be with you?

you didn’t want six months of all your hard work and effort of making time to be with him for nothing,, you had to do something about it

everyday, you, atsumu, and osamu would walk to school together with osamu typically walking ahead of you and your boyfriend

most couples would hold hands as they walked together, but atsumu had made it explicitly clear as the closer they get to school the farther they had to be from each other to avoid suspicions

thinking of it now, it sounded wrong to begin with and you had no idea why you even agreed to do such a thing

the school was close, maybe a block away and instead of slowing down your pace to create a gap between you and atsumu, you stubbornly stayed next to him to which he flickered you a weird look

he shrugged it off but the moment you two passed the gates and into campus, you slipped your hand into his

without missing a single beat atsumu immediately pulled his hand away from you with a look on his face that held all the questions running through his head at that very moment

“what are you doing?” he asks, almost in a harsh whisper

a frown melted upon your expression at how quickly he pulled away, almost as if he was disgusted by you. “i um, didn’t know you hated the thought of people seeing us together so badly.”

you didn’t know where all your strength went as it disappeared the moment you needed it the most

yet as you were about to walk away, atsumu tugs at your wrist lightly and pulls you into his embrace—his warmth and comforting scent of chamomile from saved you from the embarrassment that was tainting your cheeks red

“no, no it’s not that,” he mutters, lips tickling your forehead. “i just wanted to keep you to myself a bit longer.”

— k. kenma

you honestly weren’t surprised at the fact that kenma wanted this relationship to be kept secret

he never seemed like the type to be in a relationship let alone get the attention of being in one in the first place, yet it irked you to the core

it was fine at first; acting like you two were just friends while at school or at volleyball practice and it wasn’t at all weird or out of the ordinary

maybe that’s why you were okay with it in the first few months of your relationship with kenma as you were always near him the majority of the time

yet you constantly had to fight the urge to not be so touchy with him from wanting to hold his hand to leaning your head onto his shoulder—you often had to stop yourself especially in front of your friends and his teammates

you were good at keep secrets, but it was absolute hell not being able to even tell kuroo considering you always hung out with him too (it was a given obviously but you digress)

kuroo is a bit curious in his closest friend’s antics so his constant teases of how you and kenma would be such a cute couple annoyed you to your core

he laughs as if you and kenma being together would be absolutely impossible and wouldn’t happen in a million years, and yet here you two were, pretending to laugh at his jokes and agreeing and it would be, in fact, impossible

as mentioned before, you’re more annoyed at keeping your relationship secret rather than angry

your actions were more abrupt and cold rather than your usual warm self and kenma definitely noticed

despite his usual calm and collected expression that he has on a daily basis, it covered up his own emotions of blatant insecurity and worry that you were losing your feelings and losing them quick

the last thing kenma wanted was for everything that happened between the two of you to be wasted over his own fear of being judged for being with you

you were his first in everything and he certainly wasn’t going to let you become his first heartbreak either

he worried about this for a few days, overthinking while he played video games with kuroo, lev, and yaku that they noticed how quiet he was being over the call

it was then did he impulsively asked kuroo to go on a separate voice channel with him just so he could blurt out, “i’m dating (y/n).”

and to his surprise, all his best friend said was: “yeah, i know. (y/n) told me.”

“what? why?” kenma asked with confusion evident on his visage

“she had no one else to go to vent.” kuroo answers, his amused laugh echoing through kenma’s headphones. “don’t worry, i won’t tell anyone.”

“thanks, but... i think (y/n)’s angry at me and i don’t know what to do.”

“she told me that she was getting tired of keeping your relationship a secret. she asked me if you felt embarrassed or even ashamed of being with her.” he explained.

confusion and a bit of worry washed over kenma as his words suddenly faltered, “i could never be ashamed of being with her,”

“then i guess, you should tell her that.”

“what should i do?”

his best friend lets on a smirk (not that kenma could even see it, anyway), “i’m so glad you asked.”

you weren’t exactly sure what you expecting to be honest

you knew there was something going on between kenma and kuroo as if they were planning something intricate, but you weren’t bothered to even ask

perhaps you were still in that petty mindset of giving kenma the cold shoulder after having to keep your relationship on hold all the time that stopped your curiosity

sure, it was a bit childish, but you were planning on talking about it with kenma the moment he came back into the classroom after going off somewhere with kuroo

which by the way, where the hell were they? lunch was ending soon and you needed to talk to you boyfriend asap

the timing was almost perfect the way the thought of him entered your mind was at the same time as his familiar blonde hair walked back into the classroom with a melon bun and a canned drink in his hand from the vending machine—your favorites

“i noticed you didn’t eat lunch, so i bought you this.” he says, placing them down onto your desk.

“is this supposed to be your way of apologizing to me or something?” you mused at him.

there was a faint smile on kenma’s face when you did. this was your usual self, one that constantly smiled at him rather than deadpanned and cold. “no,” he simple put it. taking in a breath of confidence before pressing his lips on the corner of yours. “but i was hoping that would.”

with wide eyes, your eyes scanned the room to see if anyone noticed, afraid at the fact that you broke the first rule. despite being a blushing mess from a minuscule peck on your cheek, there was an inkling of confusion still evident within you, “why did you do that?”

“kuroo told me everything.”

“i knew that guy couldn’t keep a secret,” you mutter as you tried to ignore that infamous feeling of butterflies in the pit of your stomach. “i don’t think people saw, so they won’t think we’re together—”

“what if i wanted people to know we’re together?” ded asf

— o. tooru

you honestly should’ve known oikawa was going to keep this relationship between the two of you a secret since the moment he confessed his feelings to you

what else could you have expected from aoba johsai’s most popular boy wonder with an actual fanclub full of naive girls

perhaps you’ve become naive yourself considering you dealt with months of having your relationship constantly being swept under the rug, psyching yourself out that he was doing this for your sake

and you understood that

it was the reason why you even agreed to keep your relationship on the downlow considering how annoyingly notorious oikawa’s fangirls were, they wouldn’t have let you see the light of day if they were to find out

if you were in fact being honest, there was a period in time near the beginning of the relationship how cautious you were being—barely talking to oikawa unless it had to do with school, avoiding his gazes during class, and even swallowing your pride by just watching his fangirls flirt with him and there was nothing you could do about it

you honestly had to give yourself a pat on the bat for dealing with six months of this treatment

you figured it wouldn’t be that bad, especially after schools where you and oikawa could finally have alone time to yourselves, but even those times alone with him there was a lingering feeling of tension and unease

the thought of someone from school even finding out of you two being together even affected your relationship outside of school hours

you were tired of waiting outside the school gates for hours just for him to come out of volleyball practice and apologize that he couldn’t walk you home yet again

you figured that oikawa had grown far to used to seeing you waiting for him all the time that it was practically common sense that he was going to reject you again and again

you had to stop waiting for him at some point, but there was an inkling inside that for once, just for once, he would look at you with a smile so sweet that he would finally go with you

but not once has it happened

was he really that afraid of people finding out of his relationship with you that he’s willing to disregard all your hard work to even make this thing (whatever is was) to even happen?

if you were truly being honest with yourself, the only reason why this relationship is still up and active for this long is all because of you

you’re the one always asking him when he’s available during the weekends so you two could finally see each other, you’re the one always texting him first, you’re the one always being the most understanding of the situation

and yet it’s almost like oikawa isn’t even batting an eye at how difficult it has been for you

you absolutely hated jumping to conclusions and thinking of the worst case scenario and yet here you were, suddenly drowning at the possibility that the only reason why oikawa wanted a secret relationship was because he was ashamed to be with you

it was a thought that kept you up at night, tainting your optimistic thoughts of hope that this relationship would actually work out to decimate into thin air

the more is simmered in your head, the worse it became—what if his feelings that he confessed to you was a lie?

you hated overthinking

but if you really thought about it, even before you and oikawa dated, neither of you two were close. just two acquaintances in the same class that occasionally shared answers with each other just by the convenience of sitting nearby

you even went as far as believing that him dating you was just a joke, that this whole goddamn relationship was just some mindless prank just because he was bored

six months of wasted time. you were over it

the next day at school, you didn’t even look at him, you didn’t smile or even acknowledge the way he said good morning to you (as a friend does)

you figured he’s probably too dense to even notice, but he did. the usual glow you had each morning when you said good morning back to him was gone

he already missed the way your gazes would meet and how he would constantly find himself lost in your irises, but now you couldn’t even look at him in the eye

the only person who’s aware that you and oikawa were dating was iwaizumi. it was a given as who else would oikawa ramble on and on and on about how pretty you looked or how smart you are if it wasn’t his best friend?

if anything, iwa was the only guy oikawa could complain about how you were ignoring him

“maybe she’s bored of you for once,” iwaizumi cuts straight to the point. there was really no point in beating around the bush

offense was written all over oikawa’s face, utterly surprised, “how could she?”

“you can’t keep your relationship with her a secret forever, you know.” his best friend goes on to explain, “with the way things are going with you two acting like you’re nothing but acquaintances, (y/n)’s bound to lose her feelings.”

“but i don’t want her to lose feelings for me! and it’s not like i can suddenly tell all my fangirls that i’m dating someone, they’ll freak!” whines oikawa.

“why do you care about your fangirls’ feelings more than your own girlfriend? seems to me, it doesn’t even look like you care about (y/n) at all the way she’s constantly waiting for you after practice only to be rejected.”

it’s obvious iwaizumi wasn’t here to sugarcoat

“i just don’t want them to harass (y/n)...” oikawa reasons, trying to ignore the way his heart drop at iwa’s words like a gripping poison

“then that’s your job to tell those girls to back off.” he suggests, “they literally treat you like a god, surely they’ll listen if you tell them to leave her alone.”

the following day, you came across oikawa waiting outside your door, dressed in his uniform with his gaze lingering about to occupying his attention

“what are you doing here?” you ask him as you close your front door behind you. he’s probably here to break up with you, you thought to yourself

you had to force yourself to ignore the way your heart dropped at your own self-destructive thoughts

taking a deep breath as you approached him, you readied yourself for harsh news to come your way

but it never did

instead, you were greeted by oikawa’s infamous smile that made everyone at school to fall in love with this guy (including you)

he takes your hand into his, intertwining his calloused fingers that dwarfed yours in size. you don’t remember the last time you held oikawa’s hand, but it felt so familiar and warm

it was like home

you couldn’t help but feeling the ends of your lips tugging into a smile as you looked up at him, “what if someone at school sees us?”

you were expecting some kind of excuse, but all he did was shrug. “who cares?”

— k. tetsurou

when you and kuroo started going out, you certainly wasn’t expecting it to be like this

if anything, ‘going out’ would be a stretch if you count late night dates and sneaking out at midnight just to see each other as dating

it certainly wasn’t your usual definition of dating either as you yearned greatly to be able to do normal couple things with your boyfriend—like actually going out on dates during the day, eating lunch together, hell, even just holding hands!

it almost seemed laughable how normal things done in relationships were something you never even experienced with kuroo even after a few months of being together all due to him wanting to keep the relationship a secret

and if you were truly being honest with yourself, you never really understood why he wanted to keep it on the downlow in the first place

you never really questioned it as you just that much of an understanding person, but at a certain point it just wasn’t adding up

it wasn’t like he had girls going after him 24/7 despite being at the top of his class, popular, and nekoma’s volleyball captain

it wasn’t like oikawa who had an actual problem with hoards of girls surrounding him and tracking his ever move, so what was the big deal of letting your relationship public?

it was then did it hit you

the suddenly downpour of insecurity within your own loving boyfriend that you trust so much was getting the best of you

“what if he’s embarrassed to even be with me?” you contemplated in a harsh whisper to your best friend

it was in the middle of lunch and you two were sitting alone on a bench in the school’s courtyard chatting while eating—well, more like overthinking in your case while you friend just sat there and nodded

“if he actually felt that way, then he would’ve broken up with you already.” your friend stated in between bites, “besides, if i didn’t have feelings for someone, i wouldn’t put in the effort to sneak out just to see them.”

you hummed, not sure what to say as she did have a point

but could you really blame yourself for wanting an actual relationship rather than one that’s forced to go unnoticed?

“i should talk to kuroo about it...” you sigh out.

“talk to me about what?” an oh-so-familiar voice calls out to you and your friend

kuroo’s figure approaches the two of you as he give you a curt smile with hidden meanings that you weren’t able to even notice. you were too caught up in your own meddling thoughts that you also didn’t notice the way kuroo frowned slightly at the way you avoided eye contact with him

“nothing,” was all you said before standing up and throwing your trash away. “lunch is almost over so we should all get to class.” was all you said before briskly walking away

kuroo’s brows furrow in confusion as he looks over to your friend, “what’s up with (y/n)?”

“she thinks you’re too embarrassed to be with her, that’s why you hide your relationship.” she cuts straight to the point (homegirl just wants to eat her lunch in peace ffs)

“what?” your boyfriend huffs out in shock, almost offended at the fact that you out of all people would believe such a thing. “why does she think that?”

your friends shrugs, “not sure. that’s something you should be asking her, but if it were me, i would want a normal relationship as well.”

kuroo doesn’t say another word before walking away. and yet his walk quickened so he could catch up to you before you could get to class, footsteps echoing through the hallway in patters as he sees your familiar figure near your classroom

“(y/n)!” he calls out to you as you slide the classroom’s door open. it was sure to catch the attention of the rest of the students already in the classroom as you turn towards him, brows furrowed in the same confusion

as he neared you, there was almost no sign in him stopping, sending your heart beating in a frenzy as you parted your lips to tell him to slow down

but before a single syllable could even fall from your lips, your boyfriend’s own pair press against yours harshly. it was sweet like caramel and you swore everything moved in a slow motion when you suddenly realized where you two were

he stole your breath away when he pulled apart from you, eyes immediately scanning the room of his own classmates staring at him in awe

“since when were you two dating?” matsukawa asked rather loudly, it seemed that others were interested in knowing as well.

panic suddenly coursed through you as you gave kuroo a look, gravely ignoring the way yoru heart was thumping against your chest and the dozens of unanswered questions running through your head

“w-we’re not actually dati—”

“we’ve been together for a few months actually.” kuroo cuts you off, sending you a wink before entering the classroom

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astaroth1357 · 4 years ago

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Demigod MC Series: Athena

So. I have to deal with the virgin goddesses… By mythos, there really shouldn't ever be children of Artemis, Hestia, or Athena (yes, Athena was a virgin goddess). PJ got past that by making it canon that Annabeth and her siblings were born from cracking open Athena's skull (yes, that's also more or less the canon explanation). They gloss over it real quick but I remember, Rick. I've always remembered and that mental image has haunted me for years...

I can't, in good conscience, ignore the history around Athena's worship (call it an academic restraint) but I REFUSE to do the skull thing. So, since I make the rules here, I'm going with magic adoption. They still get magic powers, they're just more human than demigod. Cool? Cool.

Demigod MC Series: Intro, Aphrodite, Hermes, Hades, Dionysus, Demeter, Athena

Lucifer

The human that popped out of the portal seemed to have enough sense not to attack everyone in the room for a change, but even Lucifer could tell that was more of a strategic choice than for lack of ability...

Their very existence was highly unusual… and quite worrisome. He wasn't even aware Athena could have "children" of her own, but apparently she had been taking in some particularly bright humans to raise and train like her own...

Unbeknownst to him, a surprising amount of human scholars, diplomats, and generals have her to thank for their trade… and that alone should speak to the level of intrigue at play here.

Was this an accident or Athena's attempt to plant an Olympian spy in the Devildom too…? Either way, he didn't trust them from the get go…

Look, Lucifer isn’t stupid. Athena is a goddess of Wisdom and War and war happens on more than just the battlefield…

Since they've shown up records have been going missing, official documents keep getting misplaced, and he swears that there's some kind of bug in the student council room...!

It's infuriating watching the MC suck up to Diavolo when he's almost certain that they're running their own agenda behind the scenes! And he can't prove any of it!! They cover their tracks too well!

Lucifer has one of those corkboards covered in newspapers and string in a secret wing of the Castle - 100% dedicated to just tracking the MC's activities…. The longer they're there, the more obsessed he becomes...

He swears between Simeon, Solomon, and MC he feels like a shepherd wondering why the sheep are growling… The Devildom has never been in more danger than it is right now... Send help.

Mammon

To be honest, he kind of thought that they were just going to be Satan 2.0 but that's not really true.

They're more than just a book sponge! Though they do read, like a lot. Let’s just say from one schemer to another… Game recognizes Game.

They come up with plans and ideas soooo fast, it’s insane! Honestly, there are times where he has a new money-making plot and he just brings it to the MC first to run it over.

Nine times out of ten, not only do they sniff out any problems but they have a solution for him in a matter of minutes! His scheme game has been on point since they’ve shown up!!

They’re also even better tutoring than Satan is, so he’s even managed to get a couple A’s for the first time in his life! Lucifer actually told him he was proud (which he secretly recorded and now uses as a ringtone much to his brother’s regret...)

So yeah, he likes them... buuut that doesn’t keep him from thinking they act a little weird sometimes...

Mammon: *points to a unused tower close to the RAD building* Over there is the Tower of Sorrow. We use it for storage.

MC: Ah. Interesting… *starts writing in a notebook, muttering* It may need a few minor tweaks but the location is defensible...

Mammon: *stops* Ya say somethin’?

MC: *looks back up* Nope! Say, you’ve been to the Castle a lot haven’t you? Do you know any good ways in?

Mammon: Uhm… Why do ya want to know that…? *starts looking around for Lucifer*

MC: In case of emergencies. I like being prepared. 🙂

Mammon: Look, I don’t know what Lucifer might’a told ya…

MC: I’ll pay you a thousand Grimm for it.

Mammon: Well shit, ya want those maps with or without color?

... Yeeeah, that’s pretty weird… But it’s probably fine. I mean, as long as they keep giving him money, who’s he to complain? 🤷‍♀️

Leviathan

Also thought that they’d be a lot more like Satan but was pleasantly surprised that they were into more than books.

What else did they like exactly? Military strategy!!

It’s been a looong time since he’s been able to talk to someone who’s actually interested in all the battles he’s fought, both in the Celestial Realm and the Devildom, and their curiosity is kind of flattering...! Not a lot of people take his strategic prowess all that seriously anymore...

Plus, they are the BEST partner to have any turn-based strategy game. Hands down. He once got stuck on a level of D-COM for weeks until the MC walked in and mopped the floor with the AI!! They have a serious head for probability and tactics.

The House once made the mistake of letting these two be on the same team during a Hell Game and they absolutely demolished the competition. Mammon didn’t even get a single shot off before half his team was lost to a rigged paint grenade… It took a whole day to clean up…

However, Levi’s also noticed some odd things about the human… He likes that they’re interested in his past but maybe they’re a little… too interested?

Levi: -and that’s how we defeated the Four Horsemen before they escaped from Purgatory.

MC: Wow, Levi that’s seriously impressive!! *furiously scribbling on a notebook*

Levi: Well t-thanks… 😅 But, uhm... are you writing that down…?

MC: Hm? Oh no, just doodling. *they lift up the notebook to show a bunch of cute little sketches on the page… and not the magic-based invisible ink all over them…*

Levi: Oh you draw too? Can you do fanart???

MC: Eh, sometimes. But say Levi, can you tell me about your naval ranks again? I’m still really curious… *gets the pen ready again with a smile*

Satan

Oh, it's been a long game of cat-and-mouse between these two… and unfortunately, it’s been pretty addicting too.

He honestly had every intention of tricking the human into making a huge mess do he could bother Lucifer, but at every turn they proved just a hair too clever for him...

He once gave them a cursed book to “lend” to Lucifer, but they saw through it the moment they touched it and lifted the spell before handing it over.

He rigged a podium to spray glitter during one of Lucifer's speeches but the MC disconnected the trigger mic before he even got on stage. It was pretty dang frustrating...

At one point he got so desperate that, just as a test, he tried to trap them in the House's Music Room. Fortunately for them, it only took a few minutes to work out an escape. They even passed by him in the hallway with a wink!

It's confounding! It's infuriating!!

...and it's so damn sexy... He should be furious but he’s just in awe!!

Add on that they know their art, literature, and multiple different crafts thanks to the tutelage of their adopted mother and that’s it. He’s finished. This boy is in love.

Truthfully though, a part of him is 90% sure that they’re also gathering state secrets… Like, they’re watching Barbs and Diavolo far too close for comfort - but he just can't bring himself to care. 🤷‍♀️

The MC could walk into his room one day and say, "Hey, do you want to help overthrow the monarchy with me?" and he dreads it because deep down he knows that he wouldn’t say no…

Take some notes, kids. Some bad influences get you to drink or do drugs. Others pull you into a centuries long conspiracy to destabilize and topple rival realms from within… But he has fallen for their brain hard. Devil help them all…

Asmodeus

They’re pretty clever, he’ll give them that, but uh… Are they a little off to anybody else?

Asmo is a charmer by birthright so he has a bit of nose for when someone’s just a liiittttle too nice… Not much of a nose mind you, because he can be thrown off by compliments himself, but enough to think that the MC might be a little too… “kind” for their own good...

First off, who wants to spend that much time with Levi?? They don’t even seem that interested in anime! They just keeping asking him for old war stories…

Then all the sucking up they do to Diavolo and Barbatos? Look, he gets it. Diavolo is a delicious piece of man-hunk and his butler could give him a lesson or two in sweet-talk (and he has), but they seem to be just a little too… nosy.

Of course, Asmo’s suspicions disappear pretty quickly after they start to spoil him with spa nights and beauty secrets they picked up from “casual research” into the subject.

And you know, get a little Demonus in Asmo and start massaging his back? Oh, sweetie he’ll sing like a bird!! … with gossip. Singing with gossip.

Asmo: So I’ve heard that Lucifer has been spending more time at RAD than usual… His whole club is talking about it, they think he’s meeting with some witch!

MC: Hm, is that so? *works on a knot near his shoulder blades* What do you think?

Asmo: Ooh~! Right there, MC! *purrs and lays his head on his arms* Well come on, this is Lucifer we’re talking about! I’m sure he’s just working.

Asmo: Hmm... though come to think of it, I think I heard him asking Barbatos for the spare keys to the Tower of Sorrow…

MC: Oh really? Huh. *works out the knot and gets up* I just remembered that I left some papers with Satan... I’ll be right back.

Asmo: You’re going already??

MC: *waves him off quickly* I’ll be right back, Asmo. *hurries out the door to do totally on-the-up-and-up things… surely*

Beelzebub

Honestly he doesn't like this one… But not for the reasons you'd expect.

He agrees with everyone else that they seem a little shady, but Solomon and Simeon are too so it's not like that's anything new... 🤷‍♀️

No, no. He dislikes them because they're the person who FINALLY figured out how to keep him from eating all the food in the kitchen!!

Turns out that the trick was to put a teleportation charm on the fridge door that would send all the food away if it’s opened after a certain time of night…

And where does it go? The Purgatory Hall fridge. And where does the Purgatory Hall food go…? The HoL fridge…

It doesn’t sound so bad until you remember that it means half of their fridge is now Solomon’s leftovers…. 🤢

After they put the same kind of spell on the pantry, it was all over… He couldn't get midnight snacks from the House anymore… Everything was contaminated by Solomon…

The MC is a nice enough person, he doesn’t have a lot of complaints about them, but he wants them to leave. Now. This is inexcusable… He’s so hungry… and he doesn’t want to die by “goulash” or whatever Solomon calls his latest culinary catastrophe… He’s still too young for death… 😓

Belphegor

In a way, he absolutely could not have asked for a better person to help him get out of that attic.

… In another way, he got one of the worst possible people to try and kill... Like. They saw through his scheme sooo fast…

How was he supposed to know that the human had training in body language and sniffing out lies???

Getting the door open was a piece of cake for them. They knew enough magic to undo the seals and just rummaged around Lucifer's stuff long enough to find the key to the door. He could not have found a more competent individual for a break out, really.

It’s just… well he didn’t expect to go from locked in a room like a prisoner to tied up in enchanted rope, still like a prisoner but now mobile. 😑

They even used his own hug ruse against him! They caught his wrists when they got close and tied him up before he could shake them off...

Admittedly, it wasn't exactly the best look for them either - what with walking Belphegor downstairs to the others like a one-man-prison-caravan but they're as silver-tongued as they are sly so they talked their way out of it beautifully…

And like hell was he going to trust them after that!! And not even Beel liked them so something had to be up...

Well, you want a detective? Look no farther than Belphie (no seriously, it’s in the canon). He can put things together pretty fast when he puts his mind to it and watching the MC for a while gave him enough proof to work off of...

He always knew that, humans were bad news and the MC just proved it to him all over again. They are bad news, bad bad news and they’re going to-!

Overthrow… Diavolo…? Is that what he is getting from them…? Huh…

Wait a second, MC. You might just have him interested… 😏

#you say athena mc is smart #i say athena mc is spy #because where better to use your smarts #in war #obey me #obey me shall we date #shall-we-date-obey-me #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me demigods

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ynscrazylife · 3 years ago

Note

Hey !! i love ur writing style <3 i wanted to ask you if you could write a loki x reader where the reader and loki have been best friends for a long time now and after he faked his death in tdw he knocks on their door and the reader and loki have an argument and then they kiss?? maybe like the scene in crimson peak “you lied to me” “i did” “you told me you loved me” “i do” smth similar? :)

The Greatest Deception | loki angst fluff fic

Summary: After Loki reveals himself to be alive, Y/N has some choice words to say. Loki has a question.

Authors Note: Thanks for requesting! Also, I want to say that I fully support and acknowledge that Loki is genderfluid. Seeing as this fic was requested with Loki having he/him pronouns, I will use those pronouns. (Also, I didn’t know which pronouns you wanted me to write since you mentioned they for the reader but typically I use she/her, so lemme know if you want that edited)

Request to be on a taglist (or multiple) here! (Taglists are at the end of the fic)

MCU Masterlist #1 | MCU Masterlist #2 | Main Masterlist

PSA: Do NOT copy, steal, translate, plagiarize, republish, etc any of my works on Tumblr or any other platform. Also, do NOT claim any of my works as your own. All of these works are either requests I’ve gotten that people have wanted me to write or original ideas I’ve had for works. If you happen to take inspiration from anything I’ve written and want to write something inspired by that, please a) ask me first and b) IF I say yes, credit me as inspo in your post by tagging me and link whatever work of mine that inspired you. Thanks.

header c @/someiconsx

“Lady Y/N?”

The voice was muffled through the door and the one in question rolled from her side and onto her stomach as she laid in her bed. A low groan emitted from the creature whose limbs were tangled in the blanket and sheets.

. . .

“Lady Y/N?”

A short knock-knock accompanied the repeating words, and Y/N had a feeling of that the lovely woman who she’d love to talk to at any other time wouldn’t stop until she replied.

She pulled herself into a sitting position, smoothed over her unruly hair, and finally pulled the covers up so her pajamas wouldn’t be seen and called out, “Come in!”

The woman opened the door and sent her a sheepish smile. “The All-Father has requested your present, ma’am,” she informed her.

Y/N furrowed her eyebrows in confusion. “Do you know the reason as to why?” She quizzed.

The woman spared a quick, darting glance at Y/N’s window. “Well, the All-Father has requested all of the palace’s royals and higher-ups to gather in the courtyard. He is gathering local citizens for a, ah, play, and more would like, in this words, his ‘most esteemed confidants to enjoy,’,” she answered, subtly bouncing her weight from one foot to the other.

Y/N thought for a moment. This was the first time she was hearing that the King was holding a play — not to mention, the fact that the last play (if you could even call it that, because by Heimdall’s recounting it was horrific) was held before any of the children of Odin were born.

Just thinking about that caused a twinge to hit her stomach and for it to twist up. Loki. Odin’s youngest child and the one that had most recently left her, as he sacrificed herself to save his vaillant brother, Prince Thor. It had been weeks, maybe even a month, since Y/N had heard the news and had been resorted to a lonely, saddened version of herself. Loki was her best friend, the person she trusted more than anything and—no, no, who was she kidding? He’s more than that, and he deserves to be remembered as more than that by her.

He’s also the one that she loves, and has loved for at least the past year when she realized it.

Nonetheless, she had taken many steps to get through the grief of Loki’s dead — as had his father — and she wasn’t going to let all her hard work crumble down on one, singular thought.

“Very well, then. Please inform the All-Father that I will be there shortly, thank you,” she said.

The woman nodded and bowed her head before exiting.

Once the door had been fully shut and she could hear footsteps no more, Y/N crossed over to her window and drew back the curtains, not having missed the look at said window.

The sunlight poured into her room but the stage was indeed sent. Rows of fine chairs sat with rows of fine people in them. In front, Odin stood with a red curtain drawn closed behind him. His arms were gesturing wildly and he had a big grin on his face as he gave his speech.

Despite the curiosity that itched into Y/N’s face, she pushed it aside. She had never seen the King conduct himself in such ways, but alas, everyone grieved differently. So, she closed the curtains and got dressed for the day ahead.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

The moment Y/N stepped outside, she could’ve sworn that there was already long beads of sweat trailing down her skin. She let out a huff but journeyed on towards the courtyard, as this formal royal wear was necessary and she had no intention of pissing off Sir Snotty-Dickhead — as she called him (he had some fancy and long name she couldn’t remember, in her defense) — who was Odin’s right hand man.

By the time she got there, Odin was still rambling on with his speech, but his sudden notice of Y/N saved the guests from boredom.

“Aha, the guest of honor! Lady Y/N, herself,” Odin announced, bringing his hands together in a clap and gesturing for her to come toward him.

She betrayed herself and her cheeks involuntarily reddened as all eyes laid on her. She approached Odin and curtsied out of respect, but her mind was full of wonderings of why she, of all, would be singled out.

“I’m sure you all know who Lady Y/N is, yes?” He began, briefly pausing before continuing. “If you sadly do not, let me tell you. Lady Y/N had been a friend of the royal family, specifically my child, Loki’s—” the name caused her to suck in a sharp breath, “—and she was granted the title of Lady to uphold the image of the palace and to complete very important Asgardian duties.”

Once he stopped talking and the crowd clapped politely, Y/N took the opportunity she was presented before it’s door could close and quickly went and sat in her seat, the only seat not occupied yet, in the front row.

Odin then began speaking against whilst he walked to the side, “Speaking of my dear child Loki, this play that has been put together is one designed to honor him and his heroic sacrifice. Without further ado . . . ” He let his words trail off, and the red curtain pulled open.

Y/N’s face contorted into surprise at the words, not expecting this to take place. Again, she reminded herself, everyone grieved differently, so she decided to give it a chance. However, as the play went on, she was quick to realize that honoring Loki wasn’t the intention here. The horrid acting could be excused but Odin himself allowing this mockery of how Loki died? Of how he sacrificed himself? Well, with every second that passed, her face heated more and more — and not due to the sweat — and she grit her teeth, just barely refraining from yelling.

The worst part for her came though when the actor who played Loki did a dramatic reenactment of his sacrificed and the actor who played Thor did the worst fake crying ever. Y/N turned to the others, expecting them to be just as enraged as she was, but was floored to find that no—they were laughing. And not just that, but Odin was having himself a chuckle as well!

Her fingers tightly gripped the edges of her chair and she forced herself to look straight ahead, just about able to hold in her tears until the play was over and the actors bowed.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

Afterwards, while everyone was standing and giving Odin rounds and rounds of praises, Y/N stayed rooted in her seat. She couldn’t just let this go by as if it were nothing, but she was struggling to compose herself to confront him.

After a couple minutes of going back-and-forth, she decided, screw composure. She didn’t have to be composed. She was allowed to be angry.

So, she stood up and marched straight for him.

“All-Father,” Y/N said through grit teeth, forcing herself to curtesy, “I request your company in private, if I may.”

It took Odin a moment to tear himself away from accepting his latest comment, but the way he quickly glanced over at Y/N, she knew that he had not noticed — or perhaps he did not care — the state she was in.

“My apologies, Lady Y/N, but should I depart now, I fear I shall upset my comrades!” Odin said, ending his comment in a boastful joy, which resulted in laughter and cheers.

He didn’t wait for her response before engaging in another conversation, and Y/N’s lips remained tightly shut until she decided to just go forth and let her stuffed-up emotions out.

“Fine. I will say it in front of everyone, then!” She said, firmly and loudly, gaining everyone’s attention. “That was a pathetic excuse to remember Loki . . . It was an insult! You mocked him, your own child! How could you even— I . . . I just don’t understand . . . He sacrificed himself for your son and for Asgard and this is how you repay him? God. I expected much, much more from you for him because I . . . Let’s just say that we both love Loki, in our own ways, and I-I . . . I am very disappointed.”

Wanting to flee from the tears that were now streaming down her face and from the silence that was pounding, she turned around and she walked away, the realization that she had just confessed her love in front of everyone hitting her.

“Lady Y/N!”

Odin’s words stopped her in her tracks, but she did not turn around. Just stood. Waited.

“He told Thor, before he passed, that he, uh . . . He loved you, too.”

Y/N stared straight ahead, her hand jutting out to grab the pillar next to her to steady herself.

Loki loved her?

She didn’t stop the tears from coming this time. She let them, and the sobs, overwhelm her.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

“Lady Y/N?”

The voice and the knock were much more stiff than they were this morning.

“Come in.”

Her response was devoid of emotion, much more curt than it was this morning.

The same woman turned the door’s knob and opened it, sending Y/N, who was curled up on her bed, head nestled into her knees, a wary look. “The All-Father has requested your presence at his quarters,” she said.

Y/N let out a small huff, in no mood to talk to the King after what had happened. She forced her head up and gazed boredom at the woman. “Is it an emergency?” She deadpanned.

The woman looked around the room and by her lack of response, Y/N knew that either she didn’t know or didn’t want to say.

She sighed. “I will be there shortly,” she said.

The woman nodded and wordlessly left.

After she did, Y/N stood up and went in front of her mirror, taking in her appearance. Her once brushed hair was now frizzy and in knots and her eyes were puffy and red. Angrily, she practically tore the hairbrush through her hair and dabbed at her eyes with makeup until the red could be seen no more. She had no intention of letting him see her this way.

— — — — — — — — — — — — —

Screw formalities, Y/N thought, as she walked straight into Odin’s quarters which composed of a small living room, a bedroom down the hall, an office, and a bathroom. She didn’t bother to curtsy or announce her presence.

When he finally and gradually turned around from whatever he was doing, a slight look of shock crossed his features, before he replaced it with a warm smile. “Y/N!” He said, but quickly corrected himself, “Lady Y/N.”

Y/N frowned and crossed her arms. “I hope that you have called me here to apologize,” she said, an icy edge to her voice.

Odin nonetheless looked at her kindly. “In a way, yes,” he vaguely said, before a magical transformation underwent before her.

His wrinkles disappeared, his beard disappeared, his grey hair turned jet black, and his clothes transformed into his usual wear.

No longer was the All-Father standing in front of her, but her best friend. The one she loved.

Taken by utter shock, Y/N instinctively stumbled back, her jaw dropping and her eyes widening. “What the hell is this?” She gasped out, not wanting to believe it at first. It was a cruel trick — it must be! There was no way.

“It’s me,” the mischievous deity said, a rare softness to his voice and in his eyes. He took a step forward, but then stopped himself. “I never died, I only impersonated my father.”

Y/N stared at him, angry tears coming to her eyes once more. “How?” She forced out, thinking that maybe she was dreaming. “Why?”

Loki looked around, slightly dumbfounded, as if he hadn’t expected anyone to question him. “I wanted the throne,” he answered, as if it were obvious and a perfectly acceptable reason.

Y/N stared at him as if he had grown two heads. To her, he might as well have.

“Oh, really? So you take over your father, trick everyone - me, your brother - into believing that you’re dead, you banish Sif . . . All because you wanted the goddamn throne?” She cried.

The cluelessness left his eyes and replaced itself with guilt, regret pooling inside him. He looked down, shoulders falling with a sigh.

“I’ve felt guilty tricking you ever since it had all went down. I wanted to tell you but, honestly, a part of me didn’t think you’d be that upset over my death. But you were really, so upset and I . . . I was lost. I didn’t know what to do. All I wanted to do was hug you and tell you that it was fine, that I was here, but I thought I’d screw up your emotions and hurt you even more,” he admitted.

Y/N just looked at him, her frown growing deeper. “That’s an awful excuse,” she hissed out, words laced with venom.

Loki immediately snapped his head up to look at her and his gaze held desperateness. “It’s not an excuse,” he said quickly. “It shouldn’t be. I’m . . . I’m so sorry. The last thing I ever wanted to was to trick you, and . . . I did. But today was the final straw. I couldn’t continue like that.”

Y/N took a step forward, having an inner battle in herself on whether or not to forgive him. “You lied to me,” she reiterated bluntly.

Loki nodded guiltily. “I did,” he agreed in a small voice.

She took a pause, taking in a deep breath. “You told me you loved me,” she added.

There was a brief moment of silence before Loki said, in the same small way but a little more firm now, “I do.”

Y/N kept walking, not even fully sure or convinced of what she was doing, but knowing that she needed to do it, until she was standing just inches away from him. They looked at each other for a couple moments, neither saying anything, until Y/N wrapped her arms around Loki. He returned the embrace.

“Never do that to me again!” She yelled through the tears that were now coming. God, was she tired of crying. Especially today.

Loki hugged her tighter, his own tears falling. “I’m so sorry,” he whispered, and repeated that over, and over, and over again. “I’m an idiot.”

Y/N leaned back and cupped his face with her hands. The love she had for him overwhelmed her pain, and more than anything she needed him now. Besides, she could see his guilt. She could see the truth shining in his eyes. He wouldn’t do anything like this again, because he loved her. And she loved him.

“At least you’re self-aware,” she whispered through a sniff, taking a page out of his book with her joking remark. Before he could quip back (and she was sure he’d have an excellent one), she leaned forward and captured his lips in his a kiss. Loki smiled against her lips and wrapped his arms around her waist.

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bratkook · 4 years ago

Text

i dont mind. jjk (m) part one.

part two. pairing: rockstar!Jungkook x reader genre: band!au, strangers to lovers, lots of fluff, smut, future angst warnings: overstimulation, he spits in your mouth yum(jungkook has a thing for spit ok), multiple orgasms, oral, face sitting, fingering, its sweet & playful okay word count: 21k+ summary: What do you do when a cute boy barges into your car and demands you floor it because he’s being chased by security? Well, you floor it of course, and somehow manage to fall for him because of it. author’s note: I’ve been writing this for ages whenever i’d get a minute to spare but its here and will be two parts!! plsplspls give it a read and drop some feedback or a reblog. please listen to I Don’t Mind by Defeater, that song it the reason I wrote this lmfao.

Day One.

The iced coffee you held in your hand felt nice despite the slight breeze that surrounds you as you walk down the street, phone held against your ear as Yeri spills her heart out on the events that just happened to her. Something about being rejected by someone and that said someone’s girlfriend popping up, you were sort of lost in her story, only humming when you deemed necessary.

“This is why I'm single!”

Mhm. That sucks.

“Like can you believe that?”

I know that’s crazy.

You shuffle the bags on your shoulder higher up, wincing when you realize the weight of them had left an indent on your skin. “I’ll call you back Yeri, I’m about to get in my car.”

She said her goodbyes promising to let you know even more details on her story later before you hung up. You grab your keys out of your bag and throw the shopping bags that unfortunately do not belong to you into the trunk as you curse your boss for making you do her shopping before getting into the driver's side and starting it up.

You place your coffee into the cup holder, put the car in drive and deem yourself ready to speed off when your passenger door flies open, a man flinging his body inside, practically throwing himself onto your side and shutting the door behind him, “Drive, please just drive!”

The stranger gives you an exasperated look when the car remains at a standstill, seeing you stare at him with wide eyes but how could you not stare? He looks absolutely frantic, the red flannel he wore was hanging off his shoulder and he wasn't even on the seat properly. His hair was a mess on his head, the length of it allowing you to see he has black earrings in his lobes, but you have no time to admire him in your state of shock.

“Please!” He begs again and honestly you don’t know why you listen, maybe because he sounds desperate, maybe because you’re slightly bored and want to see where this would take you, or maybe because he probably had a gun. Regardless you do so while managing to clear the tight parking space with ease before you were speeding out of there.

He visibly relaxes as he looks behind him and your curious eyes glance at the rear view mirror to see what he was staring at, gasping when you saw cops running down the sidewalk by the spot you had just left, clearly looking for someone.

“What did you do!” You shriek, your fingers gripping the steering wheel tightly as you look over at the brown haired boy. Making decisions out of pure boredom would be the death of you, literally. If the cops were after him your reasoning of him maybe having a gun were probably right.

“Don’t freak out.”

The car screeches to a halt as you nearly pass a red light, both of you jolting forward at the sudden stop. “Don’t freak out? You invited yourself into my car, demanded I drive and I have no idea who you are. Those cops were looking for you weren’t they?”

He chooses this moment to buckle his seatbelt and pull down your visor to fix his messed up hair, great he was making himself comfortable. “Okay, okay. Yes I was running from them.”

You were a split second away from physically kicking him out of your car, “What did you do?”

He flips the visor back up and rubs his jaw, looking back again to make sure the cops had lost sight of him before turning back around to face you, “I ...might have ...stabbed someone….”

Oh so not a gun but a knife.

You could feel your blood pressure drop and your mind going a thousand miles a minute as you try to figure out a way to go about the situation but in the end you opt for screaming, “You what?!”

Your fingers press the unlock button and you reach over to unbuckle his seatbelt, seeing him look down at it with a frown as it slid up his chest and off his body. You were not going to jail for harboring a fugitive. “Get out! Get out right fucking now!”

He just stares at you so you take it upon yourself to reach over again and open the door for him to let him know you were not joking. As your door swung open it nearly wipes out a biker who yells every curse word at you before flipping you off and continuing to bike away.

That's when the boy starts laughing, closing the door and buckling back up as he motions up with a smile at the light that had just turned green, “Wow you yell really loud.” His nose wrinkled up as he laughs, acting as if him admitting to stabbing someone was casual small talk.

You continue to drive, your nervous eyes bouncing around to see how many witnesses were around in case he did something. You were also debating just driving straight to a police station because as far as you knew he was a psychopath who needed to be locked up.

When you gave him no reaction he stopped laughing. “Okay, wow. You took that seriously, you’re super tense right now...and a little pale.” He tilts his head to get a better look at your face but you refuse to look at him, “It was a joke, ha ha, I didn’t actually stab anyone okay?”

“I don’t believe you.”

“Yet you keep driving.” He has a smug smile on his face, choosing to slide down the seat to really get comfortable, “I stole some guitar picks alright? They really called out the beefiest mall cops on me for guitar picks. Pat me down if you want, I don't have anything that is stabbing material.”

“I still don’t–”

“Believe me, yeah yeah.” His hand reaches into his jeans pocket, plucking out one of the black guitar picks and holding it in front of your face to see that it was in fact new because the tiny price sticker was still on it.

There was a split second of pure silence as you stare at the pick before looking back at the road. Clearly satisfied, he sighs and pockets the pick again, choosing to spread his left arm out to rest on the head of your seat, “So, enough about me. How’s your day going?”

Cue the screaming, “Why would you say you stabbed someone you asshole!”

His eyes widen up, fingers going to plug his ears until you were finished, “Once again, you’re loud. It was a joke, lighten up.”

The muscles under your eye were twitching as you filled up with rage but you kept driving. And that's when you realized you had mindlessly began driving back to work so before you could give this self proclaimed jokester personal information you swerved to the curb and put your car in park.

“Ha ha yes it was sooo funny. Get out and tell everyone else your amazing jokes.” You gestured towards the curb with a sarcastic grin on your face.

“You’re really gonna–” He looked out at the sidewalk and back at you, “you’re gonna make me get out? Seriously?”

A nod was given in response, your hand still spread out towards the sidewalk.

“Alright, I’ll get out but you have to give me your number first.”

Your jaw dropped and your hand went limp, falling onto the center console with a thud, “What?”

“Your number, you know like your phone number?” He was already pulling his phone out, tapping on his contacts to make a new addition.

“No.”

He looked up, confusion written all over his face, not being able to fathom someone turning him down, “C’mon, let me make this up to you.”

The crisp click of your doors unlocking again filled the small car, “You getting out of my car is more than enough.”

He lets out a whistle, another grin making its way onto his face, “Feisty.”

Alright, you were ready to pop him in the face. More so when he started rummaging through your glove compartment, pulling out a random pink highlighter you had and a gas receipt that was crinkled up. He scribbled on it and slipped it back into your glove compartment, “Give me a call, I’ll buy you an iced coffee since you seem to like that.”

Your eyes flicker down at the now watered down iced coffee, only looking back when you heard the passenger door close. He blew you a kiss before strolling down the street back in the way you came.

Curiosity got the best of you so you reach over and grab the receipt from the glove compartment, looking at the paper and seeing he scribbled his number along with his name and a heart.

Jungkook.

You scoffed and crumbled it up, tossing it into the back of your car to be forgotten.

Day Twenty-four.

“Jesus Yeri stand up!” You grunted, struggling to hold your weight and hers combined as she leaned on you. She was completely shit faced, well you weren’t that far off but she was practically dead weight right now.

“He was so cute.” She whined out, rubbing your cheek with the back of her palm.

You managed to shuffle the both of you over to the brick wall by the club, gently pushing her against it to ease the weight off, “You were flirting with the mural on the wall Yeri.”

Yeri mumbled a couple of angry things before throwing her head back and smacking it onto the brick wall with a nasty thud. Her face contorted into pain as she clutched onto the back of her head, resulting in her completely losing her center of balance and face planting it onto the concrete. It all happened too fast for your drunk mind to comprehend and you only noticed she was now on the floor when she groaned in pain.

“Oh my god.” You crouched down and flipped her over onto her back, sighing out when there were no visible injuries or blood, “I thought you were gonna break your face.”

Her eyes widened as she patted her cheeks, “No I’m too pretty!”

She lay there, hands inspecting her face for anything while you gave up. You chose to sit on the ground with your back against the wall, leaving Yeri on the floor in front of you because wow your legs really fucking hurt. Dancing with heels on for three hours did not feel nice no matter how many shots you threw back.

This was supposed to be a fun outing, which it was, but neither of you were planning on getting as drunk as you are now. Obviously things didn’t go as planned, once she saw some guy she used to fool around with the stories of every failed relationship came flooding out of her mouth and the only way to get her to stop was to make her drink.

Everything was great, dancing with each other and making friends with other drunk girls was always the highlight of nights out but when you lost Yeri and found her trying to make out with a mural you decided it was time to leave.

“Where’s our uber?” She mumbled out, curling up on the floor, deeming it the perfect napping area.

“I got it.” You reached into your bra and pulled out your phone to order the uber except the screen wouldn't light up. The reflection of you pouting at your phone stared back at you when the charging icon flickered before going black.

You don’t got it.

It was dead and apparently so was Yeri’s.

The phone went back into your bra as your fingers gripped the wall to pull yourself back up. The black stilettos you had on were slipped off your feet and placed beside Yeri as you walked a few feet up the sidewalk to see if anyone had exited the club. The ground was dirty and your feet were throbbing as you walked but you didn’t pay much attention to it.

The area surrounding the club was empty except for a few girls who were way more drunk than you stumbling away in the opposite direction. Once you turned back around when you realized no one could help, you heard the sound of voices, men to be more specific.

Oh god. You instantly got nervous and hurried back to Yeri, attempting to sit her up to not draw attention to how drunk both of you were.

“You should’ve gone for it!”

“She was all over you dude.”

They all started laughing with each other as they got closer to the pair of you.

“Nah, she wasn’t feeling it.”

Once again they all groaned in unison, “She wasn’t feeling it? I don’t know it looked like she was feeling up all over you.”

You kept your gaze forward, hoping that if you ignored them as they passed they would ignore you. Yeri had a different plan.

“Hey!” She shouted out and you just held your breath as they stopped walking a few feet away from you. “Can you get us an uber?”

“Why, are you broke?” One of them asked as they came closer, making a few of them laugh.

“No, we’re drunk.” She giggled out as her head lolled over onto your shoulder.

Please don’t hurt us. Is all you could think as they moved to stand in front of you both.

“Yeah, we’ll get you guys an uber.” You hesitantly looked up at the one who pulled his phone out, expecting to see some creep staring down at you both with sinister eyes but instead you saw a dimpled face guy with purple hair and a look of concentration that was lit up by the glow of his screen.

“Holy shit, my partner in crime?”

“Dude what?”

“That’s the girl that helped me get away from the damn cops. What’s up Bonnie.”

You scrunch your face up as you tried to see who he was talking to because neither of you were named Bonnie. “What?”

“You know, Bonnie and Clyde.” That's when he crouched down in front of you and gave you a smile.

Jungkook.

“Oh my god, you!”

His friends laughed at how pissed you sounded, “In the flesh. You look like you had a fun night.”

You placed your hand on his forehead before pushing him back making him flop down on his ass, “Fuck off.”

Yeri was handed the phone to input the address, her tongue poking out as she slowly typed it, trying her best to not make any mistakes. You’d grab it from her but it probably wouldn’t make a difference.

“You never texted me.” Jungkook playfully whined, remaining seated while the rest of his friends fell into their own conversation.

“I seemed to have misplaced your number, it’s probably somewhere in a landfill if I’m being honest.”

He pressed a palm to his heart as he winced, “Ouch, can I at least get your name?”

You stretched your feet out, your calves felt cold against the concrete but you didn’t mind it. The least you could do was give him your name, “Y/N.”

He was about to respond, something smug you were sure but he was cut off. “The app says this address doesn’t exist…where do you guys live?” He looked to you for an answer because Yeri had fallen asleep.

“In Gangnam.”

Jungkook stood up, reaching his hand out for you to take, “I can drop you guys off if you want?”

You let him pull you up but you protested on the offer for a ride. It was half hearted because you didn’t want to be a burden but you also didn’t want to be stranded here until the first morning bus. “No I don’t wanna bug you.”

He already reached down and grabbed your shoes, holding them in his left hand while letting you balance on him. “Don’t worry about it. I’d rather make sure you get home safe instead of laying on the street, consider this me making it up to you.”

The purple haired boy and another with silver hair reached down to help pick Yeri up since she was out cold. “My cars parked down the street.”

You mumbled out a slurred response, letting yourself lean on him. Jungkook had left your mind since your incident two weeks ago but you were pretty thankful it was him and his group of friends that had stumbled upon you instead of other creepy guys.

The whole group reached Jungkook's black sedan, opening up the back door to slide Yeri in and buckle her up while he helped you slide into the passenger’s side, clicking your seat belt into place.

“I’ll catch up with you guys yeah? Text me the address of the restaurant Namjoon.” The guy with purple hair agreed and waved at you before him and the others wandered further down the street to the other car.

Jungkook gently closed the door, making sure your feet were good before going around the car to get into the driver’s side. “Alright, I know how to get to Gangnam but you’re gonna have to help with your streets. Can you do that?”

“Yup!” He gave you a smile as he started up the car and slowly made his way out of the parking spot and beginning the route to Gangnam.

“I’d offer you a water bottle but these are all empty or half empty.”

You wiggled your feet, pushing around a few bottles that were on the floor in front of you, “Why?”

“My car overheats a lot. She’s thirsty but I love her.” Jungkook had a look of appreciation on his face as he patted the steering wheel and you couldn’t help but giggle.

“So where was this thirsty car when you were looking for a getaway driver?”

“Parked way too far away to be a good enough getaway car, you were very convenient.”

The lights of the clubs in Hongdae swirled by as he passed them, putting you in a trance as you rested your head against the window. “Well,” you sighed, “I’m glad I was able to help.”

The rest of the ride was filled with the soft hum of the radio playing a rock song that Jungkook mumbled under his breath. He was relatively quiet which differed from the small snippets of his personality that you had gotten glimpses of. Maybe he was keeping quiet because you were too drunk to really hold a conversation.

After directing him through the small streets you arrived at your complex, the surrounding area practically dead because people were either clubbing or fast asleep in their beds. Jungkook got out and helped you step out of the car, letting you rest against the door as he tried to get Yeri’s unconscious ass out of the vehicle.

You were less wobbly than you were earlier so you wrapped one of her arms around your shoulder even though realistically Jungkook took most of the weight. You typed in your code into the keypad and the front doors slid open, the three of you shuffling into the building and into the elevator.

“Who are you?” Yeri mumbled out while looking up at Jungkook

“A figment of your imagination.”

She nuzzled into him as the elevator rose up, “You’re cute.” Is all she said before she knocked out again, her body becoming more limp than before if that was even possible.

After a bit of a struggle and the pair of you almost dropping Yeri, you finally got into your apartment and laid her out on the couch. You let yourself fall onto the loveseat beside it and watched Jungkook take his phone out to scroll through the messages his friends had sent him.

“The guys are eating somewhere in Myeongdong do you wanna join us?”

You slumped down, your elbows resting on your knees, “Too drunk.”

That was very true, now that you were sat in one place you noticed that the room seemed to be spinning. He hummed as he took in your appearance, deciding to hand his phone over to you even though he was debating trying to persuade you. He knew more than anyone that beef tasted best when drunk but he also knew more than anyone that eating beef when that drunk resulted in it coming back out in the form of throw up. “Next time then.”

You grabbed the device, not really sure what he wanted until you saw that it had the number pad open and a blank contact waiting to be filled in. He was persistent.

You finally filled out your contact information, throwing in the middle finger and heart emoji beside your contact name before handing it back, not missing the giant smile that spread across his face.

Day Fourty-two

A nearly empty iced americano was is your hand as Jungkook dragged you down the streets of Hongdae once again, “I can’t believe your ass paid this much for an iced coffee.”

He sipped his own drink, smiling with the straw between his teeth, “One, it tastes great so stop complaining it wasn’t your money, and two did you not see how cute that place was? Definitely worth it.”

You had finally responded to the texts he had been sending you since he gave you and your friend a ride, the constant string of memes and stupid jokes he would send you only made you giggle to yourself but they wouldn’t elicit a written response.

You would open the texts while you walked from one place to the next, holding in your laughter in public or sharing them with your friends when boredom struck at work. But after a few days of silence on your end the memes and jokes ended and you couldn’t stop yourself from finally sending a text, Why’d you stop?

That was probably his plan all along, get you hooked on the jokes so you couldn’t stay away. Well it worked because the memes continued and with that came the invitation to finally getting you an iced coffee. The hassle of finding time between your always changing work schedule pushed the date further back but the wait was worth it.

“You’re right, it wasn’t my money so thanks. Where are we going now anyways?” He had told you to dress comfy and you were glad you listened because you guys had been walking for a while and if you had worn your normal flats your feet would be blistered by now. Your converse weren’t exactly the best but it worked, and Jungkook thought the same since he was rocking a pair of his own. Along with that he was also wearing a pair of ripped black jeans, a grey tee and a leather jacket on top that helped keep him warm now that the sun was setting.

“Somewhere fun. You’ll love it, I hope.”

A couple of blocks later and you were entering a dimly lit club, the bass shaking the walls. This was not what you’re used to, yeah you go to clubs on occasion but they’re usually playing the latest hits and everyone’s drunk and grinding on each other. A club like this, with a band playing and people moving around to the beat of a rock song was out of your element.

The second you stepped in Jungkook was greeted by a few people, shouts of heys and random handshakes being exchanged while he kept one hand on your shoulder to not lose you.

“You come here often?” You shouted over the music, luckily he had moved his face closer so he could hear you properly.

“Yes I do. A couple of my friends are performing tonight though, it’ll be a little more mellow than it is right now.”

You hoped that was true because from what you could see the current crowd were throwing elbows and a few fists around and you didn’t want to be caught in the middle of that. Jungkook seemed to grasp your hesitance so he lead you to the back, leaning against the wall he spread his arms out to invite you to lean into him. There wasn’t really an option, everyone was crowding around the back and if you leaned on him you wouldn’t get shoved around so you did.

He kept a loose grip around your waist, letting you rest your back against his chest, feeling him hum along to the current song, his hands gently tapping out a beat on your stomach. Jungkook rested his chin on the top of your head due to your height difference, you both probably looked ridiculous but it just made you laugh to yourself.

“Oh look they’re about to come on!” One of his hands lifted off your waist to point towards the stage where two people walked on, guitar in one of their hands, a box drum in the other’s and microphones being placed in front of them.

You remembered them from that other night, the one with silver hair that helped carry Yeri and another boy with faded orange hair that you hadn’t spoken to. One sat on the stool while the other made himself comfortable on top of the box drum, pulling the microphones a little closer as they settled in, “Thanks for coming out, I’m Jimin,”

“I’m Hoseok.”

“and we’re gonna play a couple of slow songs for you guys. Is that alright?” The audience cheered and raised their drinks up, a couple of girls screaming out that they loved them.

Both of them smiled at that, shifting in their seat and checking the tune of the guitar. Jimin tapped on the guitar and softly counted to three before he started playing off chords, Hoseok joining in to create a beautiful melody that made you want to dance along. And then he started singing and you knew you had just become a fan, especially when Hoseok joined in, both their voices mixing together perfectly. The crowd sang along, obviously being fans of them, their arms in the air slowly swaying side to side, it just made you wish you knew the song so you could join along.

“They’re really good.” You mumbled out to Jungkook who had dropped his head down onto your shoulder.

“Glad you think so. We’re in a group together, you should come see us next time we play.” You couldn’t say no to that, not with how his face lit up with hope that you’d say yes.

HALLOWEEN Day Sixty-seven

And that's exactly how you found yourself with a small group of your friends at the same club on the night of Halloween, but instead of being in the back the four of you managed to slip your way into the crowd right in front of the small stage.

You sipped your drink as you waited for the previous group to clear off the stage, the crowd was calm during their set, not really liking them as much which you were thankful for because you did not want your drink on your shirt.

“So what’s their name?” Irene asked as she looked around, Yeri and Seulgi waiting for a response because you had dragged them all this way with absolutely no explanation other than they had to come. You would’ve came alone but you just didn’t have it in you, the thought of doing that filled your stomach with too many nerves.

“Absolutely no idea.”

Seulgi smirked, raising her eyebrow at you, “Okay then, what instrument does the one you wanna fuck play?”

“Lead guitar.” It slipped out before you could stop yourself so your lips wrapped around your straw once again as the three of them gasped and started making a scene.

“Oh my god Y/N, go for it–”

“Especially if he’s hot!”

“Do you know if the feeling’s mutual?”

You were sipping on pure ice at this point, your drink running dry and no longer allowing you to stall. “Yes he’s hot and he’s also really fucking dorky in an adorable way.”

Irene smacked your arm, “Wait is it meme boy?”

Question marks appeared over the other two's head, obviously having no idea what kind of code name meme boy was.

You just nodded at her before she smacked your arm again, “Go for it!”

You were honestly tempted to do so but so far Jungkook hadn’t tried to make a move, yes he was flirty but that just seemed like his personality. Your texts were always friendly, very sarcastic and full of jokes and you had only really hung out twice since the last time he brought you here so you were stumped. Plus you weren’t quite sure what your friendship was...boy that snuck into your car and also saved your drunk ass while showing you good music and becoming someone you text regularly?

Suddenly the entire crowd shifted, everyone stepping up and successfully pushing you out of your train of thought and the four of you closer to the stage. Your knees grazing the stage and the feeling of elbows digging into your back just made you remember how nice being in the back last time had been but you wanted to see his group so you’d deal with it.

One by one they came out, all with giant smiles adorning their faces as they took their place and that's when your eyes landed on Jungkook who was standing directly in front of you, his shiny black guitar hanging off his shoulders.

Your eyes trailed up from his legs to his guitar where his hands loosely gripped the neck and that's when you noticed the subtle trails of ink he had adorning his skin, you had never seen those before considering he usually had a sweater or some sort on due to the current weather, but they definitely suited him. There wasn’t too many of them, simple script across his chest and a few designs against his left arm but they were bold enough to stand out. Your eyes went further up to see him staring right at you, a giant smile on his face when he realized you had actually made it.

“You came!” He mouthed out to you, his eyes crinkling up in excitement when you smiled back and nodded at him.

Irene shook your shoulder and squealed when she noticed that but luckily he had already turned around, lightly strumming a few times while the guy you remembered as Jimin spoke, “Wow, there's a lot of you here tonight. I see some of you have dressed for the occasion, we obviously haven’t because to be honest it gets hot as fuck up here.”

Shouts were heard from all over, mixing in with the sound of the members all checking their instruments when the man holding the bass grasped the mic in front of him with a smirk, “Plus a mask wouldn’t let you guys see my pretty face and lets face it, they’re just here to see my pretty face Jimin.”

Jimin shook his head as he fidgeted with his own guitar, his head lifting up for his eyes to scan the room, “Is that true guys? Did you all just wanna see Taehyung’s pretty face?”

Noises of approval and a few dirty comments were shouted towards the stage making Taehyung wink in return which only caused more noise from the girls all around, he was clearly the man in charge of making the girls go crazy.

Jungkook had turned back around, his hand no longer holding the neck of his guitar, instead just letting it hang low on his body. He grasped his own microphone, the damn black pick he stole being held between his fingers as he pressed his lips against the mic, “And what about my pretty face?”

The crowd got even louder than before and you couldn’t stop from rolling your eyes with a smile when he looked down at you, winking before crinkling up his nose and laughing at everyone's reaction.

“And what about me?” Shouted Hoseok, the drummer who was now standing up on his drum stool with his arms spread out.

The cheers continued and Jimin waved his arms around to silence everyone, “Alright, alright. Everyone here has a pretty face, but let’s be honest, it’s me you’re here for.”

Laughs were heard but before any of the members could respond to that he brought the microphone back to his mouth, “Anyways this is a new song, hope you enjoy it!”

Hoseok tapped his sticks together before the song began, the entire crowd moving along to the rhythm that you and your friends couldn’t help but join in. That's how the entire show went, even with the songs everyone but you four knew, the experience was fun and it was even more entertaining to see Jungkook on stage.

The white shirt he had on was damp with sweat and the collar was hanging loosely around his shoulders, letting you see the ink that painted his chest more freely. He got lost in the music, certain songs making him bob his head with his eyes shut while others made him roam the stage and interact with the crowd while him and Taehyung joked around and before you knew it they were saying their goodbyes, taking a bow on stage before hopping off and disappearing into a door to the right.

The four of you immediately slid your way out of the crowd that was still shouting out for them to come back out, finding yourselves back at the bar to get more drinks.

“They were so good!” Seulgi complemented before taking a sip of her beer.

“They really were and the amount of times Jungkook looked down at you,” Irene whistled,”you’d be stupid not to make a move.”

You took a sip of your own drink, replaying the moments Jungkook had looked down at you as he shredded away on the guitar. It was hot to say the least, you had to come out to more of their shows from now on.

A bit of a commotion was heard behind you before you felt someone sling their arm around your shoulder. You looked up in shock and saw Jungkook looking down at you with a sweet smile that didn’t match the smirks he was sending on stage. He had changed into a black shirt and he didn’t look as sweaty as before. “Did you like the show?”

You pretended to think about it, enjoying the fake shocked lock on his face before you admitted that you had really enjoyed it. “Definitely. You guys are really talented.”

He bowed his head down, suddenly feeling shy at your praises. “Thanks that means a lot, we’re gonna head out to this party our friend’s throwing not too far from here. Did you guys wanna go?” He looked at you then towards your friends.

“We didn’t drive here.” Irene spoke up.

He just shrugged in return, “There’s space in our van if you’re willing to squeeze together.”

Your friends could see that you were thinking of it because a party did sound inviting and they knew you had the hots for the guitarist so they motioned for you to say yes.

Jungkook noticed and his grin only widened when he saw you nod in agreement, clapping his hands together and telling you all to follow him outside, saying the bartender would put your drinks on his tab and to not worry about it.

On the way out a few girls tried to grab his attention but he only smiled and reached for your hand to get out of there but not before you saw the nasty stares being sent your way once they saw your hands intertwined.

Once you stepped out you noticed the sun had barely set, remnants of pinks and purples still lingering in the sky as the dark blue hue slowly overtook it. There was a slight breeze nipping at your skin, making you squeeze Jungkook’s hand as a reflex. He looked over at you as your group walked down the sidewalk, seeing your hair fan out to the side and the way you tried to look down to stop the breeze from hitting your face, the sight made him circle his thumb around your palm, sending tingles up your arm.

In that moment you felt like a schoolgirl developing a crush, stuck in the phases in between wondering if this was something you would forget in a few weeks or something genuine you felt inside. The feelings in the beginning of liking someone were always your favorite, finding out little quirks about them, realizing what you did and didn’t have in common and the anticipation of not knowing if they felt the same lingering in the back of your mind.

Was this situation love? Absolutely not. It was more than likely lust but considering the short time you had known each other that was a given, although maybe you could nudge that lust over into a nice like.

“Hey guys, this is Y/N and her friends.”

You finally looked up and saw Jimin, Hoseok, and Taehyung gathered around a black van, loading up the back with amps and their instruments.

“Isn’t she the girl you gave a ride to last time? Thought her name was Bonnie?”

Jungkook quickly said it was a joke as you nodded, slightly embarrassed at that memory and with Yeri’s noise of realization and horror you knew she felt the same.

“I knew I recognized you!” Jimin spoke with excitement as he pointed at you before turning back to the van to help continue the game of tetris in the form of amps. He stuck his head back out for another moment, “I kept trying to go on your side but Kookie here seemed to be a little territorial on that side of the stage.”

Jungkook rolled his eyes with a grin, mumbling out to ignore him and then stepping in to help his friends finish packing up. The back of the van was slammed shut and locked, Jimin rounding off to enter the driver’s side with Hoseok calling shotgun and Taehyung calling the only available seat in the back row because the rest were occupied with equipment.

Irene, Seulgi and Yeri stepped into the van’s middle row, Irene placing Seulgi on her lap and Yeri sliding in next to her, leaving you and Jungkook to squish into the last remaining seat. You shuffled in, feeling Jungkook step in after you and close the door but before you could sit down you felt his hands grip your waist and gently sit you down on his lap.

The heat rushed to your face at the position and the audience you had around you but you just laughed it off and shifted around so you sat sideways, facing your friends and letting Jungkook have a view of your profile.

“Sorry, it was either this or being squished beside my thunder thighs.” He whispered out to you with a laugh as he patted his muscular thighs.

“It’s fine, your thunder thighs make good cushions.”

He squinted his eyes at you with a grin, “Good to know.”

The engine started up and the conversations immediately followed, Jimin asking for brutal honesty from your group because deep down he thinks they need improvement. The chorus of no you guys are great from your friends filled the vehicle and a small tap on your shoulder from Jungkook drew your attention away from Jimin’s half convinced face in the rearview mirror.

“Hey how’s work been?” He asked quietly, a small grin spread onto his lips as he waited for your response.

There was always something nice about being asked questions you knew were genuine, and in this case you definitely knew it was genuine since you had been bitching and moaning to him about how much you hated your boss.

“I barely survived the week.”

“Yikes, what did she have you do?”

Oh man, where would you start? If this were a regular office job maybe it’d be easier to talk about but no, you were the head assistant and writer in training of the CEO of the biggest fashion magazine in South Korea and she just happened to sometimes be the devil reincarnated.

“She made me pick up her kid from daycare first off.”

“Why, did she forget?”

“No, in her exact words she said I don’t feel like seeing him today he gives me migraines.”

Jungkook laughed at that and so did Taehyung since he grasped the end of your sentence. In retrospect it was kind of funny but it also wasn’t in your job description to be a nanny.

“I can handle taking her coffee and picking up dry cleaning and phone calls and literally everything else but come on, she has three nannies.”

His palm gently patted your knee as he gave you a sympathetic smile, “Smile and breathe. Who knows maybe picking her kid up gave you brownie points and when she’s old and on her deathbed she’ll give you the company.”

You could only hope.

It was now three in the morning and somehow the majority of the people at this party were still kicking. The second everyone entered the house shots and halloween props were passed around in celebration of their friend Seokjin getting signed to a huge label to officially begin his career as a solo artist. He had gone around shouting fuck yeah no more playing on street corners throughout the whole night. He was probably somewhere in the house passed the fuck out.

Yoongi, a producer and close friend of theirs, and Hoseok were in the kitchen mixing up more drinks and discussing the band’s upcoming album and what ideas they had. Yeri and Irene were playing a match of beer pong against Seulgi and Jimin while Taehyung and a bunch of others you were unfamiliar with cheered them on. You were wandering around with a red cup full of water, the second you’d finish a beer you’d chug a cup of water because hangovers were the death of you.

“Hello miss soon to be CEO.”

A bottle was handed to you and you took it while grinning at Jungkook, his cheeks were flushed a cute red and his eyes and crooked devil horns made it clear he was a little past tipsy.

“Hi mister soon to be rockstar.”

He threw his head back as he chuckled, choosing to lean back against the wall that divided the kitchen from the living room. “Oh being a rockstar would be so crazy, imagine traveling all over the world. Are you gonna be there to make sure my outfits are fashion worthy?”

You gave him a once over, pretending to find his outfit unappealing and enjoying the look of shock that came across his face at your judgement. “I think you’re fine in the outfit department.”

Jungkook's eyes narrowed at you and his lips pursed slightly as he watched you take a swig of your drink, your water now forgotten and placed on the small coffee table full of bottles. “But what if I want you there with me?” His confession was quiet, so quiet it made you think you had imagined it, until he repeated it when you looked up at him and mumbled out a dumb huh?

“What if I want you there with me, y’know traveling the world and junk.” He seemed shyer now than before, his thumbs twiddling with the head of his bottle as he gave you a sideways glance.

“Well,” you took a step forward, choosing to stand beside him against the wall and nudge his shoulder, “I’ll be there as long as you want me there.”

Jungkook could feel himself grin at your statement, seeing you grinning right back as you tilted your head up to look at him.

“Can I ki–”

“Hey! You two look way too sober to be having a good time!” Jungkook’s head turned towards the direction of the voice seeing Jin who was miraculously not fucking passed out standing there while trying to juggle a few shots, fake blood dripping down his mouth accompanied by fangs and a cloak.

He was about to respond before your hand cupped his cheek and turned his face towards you, your lips wasting no time in slotting between his own. That caught him by surprise for a split second before he relaxed, his free hand coming around to weave through your hair. Before he was able to fully enjoy your surprising display of affection you were stepping back with a smile.

“Yeah you can kiss me.”

Day Eighty-nine

You had just finished slipping on your pair of tan booties when something caught your attention through your window. The bed squeaked underneath you as you stood up to peak outside, seeing Jungkook's car parked a couple of cars away from your complex.

“Fuck how long has he been waiting out there for?”

You huffed the hair out of your face as you reached for your phone, expecting to see a text from him saying he was here but you were greeted with nothing. That just made you smirk to yourself in the mirror as you fixed your hair.

You didn’t waste any more time grabbing your bag and leaving your unit, you had the element of surprise on your side so you wanted to use it before he texted you he was here.

Once you were out of your complex you slowly crept towards his car, standing a few feet away before you decided to sprint towards it, swinging open the thankfully unlocked door and throwing yourself into the seat much like he had when you first met.

“Drive just drive!” You shouted out as you reached for his shirt to clutch onto and weakly shake him.

The scream he let out during the whole thing made this all worth it. He didn’t catch a good enough look to realize it was you until he swatted your hands off and cursed.

“What the fuck!”

You covered your face as you laughed, resting back into the seat properly as you shut the door and buckled yourself up. “What’s wrong you big baby, c’mon let's go.”

He continued to stare at you, a deer caught in a headlight with his chest pounding and his lungs working in overdrive. “Who does that!”

“You.”

He stuttered over his words before giving up and rubbing his face with a groan that eased into a laugh. “I hate you.”

You reached over and gently patted his cheeks with a smile, “I hate you too. Now c’mon!”

Jungkook took a deep breath before grinning and starting the drive. After Seokjin’s party and the two of you kissing your relationship had become weird. Not in the sense of awkwardness, more like oh god we kissed what does that make us? What direction does this go in, friends, friends with benefits or a relationship dare you say.

After a week of it Jungkook decided to throw caution to the wind and ask you out on a proper date. He was very blunt about it, his exact words being I don’t know how I feel exactly but it makes me happy and I want to take you out to see where this goes. Please tell me you’re up for it.

You couldn’t say no even if you wanted to, hell your friends wouldn’t allow you to even think about telling him no. Jungkook was always as understanding as could be when it came to your work, he knew your career was your top priority, filling the time between then and now with never ending messages about what he had planned for it. It made you feel like you were in highschool, enamored by the cutest boy in class who only had eyes for you, slyly responding to his messages when you had the time underneath your desk at work.

When the clouds parted and you were given a day off, one hundred percent off, no worrying on if Mijoo would text you and demand you come in, you pounced on it, immediately asking Jungkook if his date needed more of a heads up than a day. The odds were in your favor, so now you were on your way to a cute little cafe beside Han River in Jungkook's thirsty car with the feeling of butterflies in your stomach.

It had been a while since you’ve felt this giddy about someone, work had basically taken over your life so you had absolutely no time to even think about a relationship with anyone. Sure you went out with Yeri and the girls whenever you all had a moment to spare and sure you’ve had your fair share of one night stands because a girl has needs but this, this was definitely new.

You found yourself excited to get messages from Jungkook, regardless of what they were. His random bursts of messages that he sent when his mind was whirling around and he just had to tell you of how certain he was that life was just a simulation and follow it up with fifty messages providing sources and proof. The random goofy selfies he’d send you in the middle of his band practice and on his lunch in the back room of his “real life job” because sometimes your dream job doesn’t pay all the bills.

But, your favorite texts would be the ones he would send when he thought of you, maybe a random flower on his walk out, a random stuffed animal, the smell of coffee. There was always something sweet about being shown that you were missed and being thought of.

His messages were no longer one sided at all, you had sent him a good amount of I miss you texts and selfies and memes and he was just as sucked in as you were. He hadn’t told you yet but he had a folder saved on his phone full of the ugly selfies you’ve sent him and screenshots of his favorite messages. It was clear that the lust you had for him earlier has nudged way over into a nice little like.

“Wait what?”

You were now sat in the corner of the cafe, right underneath a vibrant neon sign that just begged to be taken pictures with and luckily Jungkook had done so for you. A half finished iced coffee sat in front of you and a cup of green slush that used to be his green tea frappe sat in front of him, a slice of cake was currently being picked at by both of you in the middle of the table.

“I’m so nervous!”

You had just finished telling Jungkook about the new opportunity presented to you at your job. The fact that your boss had put her trust in you and allowed you to do a full spread for the last winter issue set to drop in the beginning of February on whatever topic or subject you deemed appropriate was shocking. How did you go from fetching her clothes and drinks and dealing with her appointments to doing a full spread?

“Don’t get me wrong, I know I worked hard for this to happen but like...what’s the catch?” you paused and took a sip of the last remaining part of your drink, “I can do this, one hundred percent.”

“Of course you can, you’re like ready to emerge from your cocoon. You won’t be able to see it but your wings are gonna be sick as fuck.” He cut you off, sending you a genuine smile before cutting a piece of the cake and popping it in his mouth as if he hadn’t just said the sweetest words to you.

“Are you calling me a caterpillar?” You tease, smiling when he forces himself to swallow the cake in his mouth, an exasperated face adorning his features.

“No you doofus, I’m calling you a butterfly.” He rolls his eyes before focusing back on the cake, his fork stabbing at another piece, “My butterfly.” He grumbles so lowly you almost don’t hear it.

You smiled at him in thanks for believing in you, opening your mouth to tease him about the cute analogy but not having a chance too since he thought it would be great to shove some cake in your mouth too.

“Whatever you decide to focus it on, I know you’re gonna make it work. I believe in you Y/N, I hope you believe me now when I say the she-devil will leave you in charge when she’s done.”

Now that was harder to believe, almost laughable honestly but you appreciated his kind words of support. You couldn’t help the slight smile that crept up on your face as you thought of the way to phrase the following words.

You finished chewing the cake in your mouth and occupied yourself by swirling your straw around the ice left in your cup. Jungkook watched you intently, picking up the slight nerves you clearly had but decided to just observe. He could tell you had something you wanted to blurt out by the way you nibbled on your lips.

“I actually have an idea,” you started off, pursing your lips slightly as your raised your head back up to make direct eye contact with him, seeing his head tilted slightly and his eyes giving you a questioning look, “I was wondering how you—well all of you actually—would feel being the subject I cover for my spread?”

His jaw dropped slightly at that, his eyes bouncing around the cafe almost as if he was trying to bring himself back to reality by remembering his current location. “Are you serious?” He wasn’t sure if you knew what that would mean to him or his band. The magazine you worked for was not some small internet zine that a handful of people read, no, it was one of the most influential magazines sold in Korea. If you guys wrote that an ugly orange beret was the next big thing then dammit every ugly orange beret would be bought and worn the following day.

The amount of publicity their band would get could potentially boost up their career and that’s exactly why they were your first option. They deserved to be heard, to move on from playing small clubs to bigger venues. They deserved to be able to fully live out their dreams and if you focusing a full spread on them helped in the slightest then you would do so.

“Yes, I’m serious Jungkook.”

A laugh left his lips as he covered his face with his palms, shaking his head in disbelief. “Holy shit...why?”

“Because just how you believe in me, I believe in you.”

Day One Hundred & Twenty

“Is this okay?” Taehyung asked you as he adjusted the leopard printed blanket he currently had draped around his shoulders. Him and the rest of Bangtan were in a studio taking shots for the spread next month and to put it simply, they were fucking nervous. They weren’t models, they didn’t consider themselves fashion savvy, they were completely out of their comfort zone but you assured them that they had to do this in order for the spread to be accepted by your boss.

As much as you wanted to slap pictures of them on stage in all their glory, this was a lifestyle and fashion magazine so you were going to tie those two together with their music and fucking run with it.

“Yes, you look great Tae!” You shouted behind the photographer, stepping back a little to give him room to work. Your back bumped into something and you stopped and glanced behind you, smiling widely when you saw Jungkook grinning back down at you.

“You look so hot bossing people around.”

He was one to talk, he looked so hot just standing there doing absolutely nothing. His black hair was laying messily on his head, he had a bit of light red eyeshadow around his eyes to give the pictures more of a pop, his outfit of choice being a leather jacket and a white tee tucked into tight black skinny jeans and his classic black boots.

“You just look hot.”

His lips turned up into a smirk, his hands tucking themselves in the pocket of his jeans, “Oh yeah?”

You hummed in response, letting your eyes gaze up and down his body and he clearly wasn’t opposed to your attention since he took it upon himself to give you a small twirl, finishing it off with a laugh.

“This still doesn’t feel real Butterfly.” He admitted as he threw his arm around your shoulder and brought you closer to his side, the both of you watching Taehyung posing for the camera and trying not to laugh as Hoseok teased him from the sidelines.

“Why?”

Jungkook took a deep breath and paused for a moment, letting everything really hit him. “I don’t know. I mean, we’re a random fucking local band that plays shows in a hole in the wall bar yet we’re here being styled by some of the best people. Shit, I’ve never had my makeup done for me so I didn’t expect to like it this much, but I know the girl who did it is probably top notch and this photographer,” His finger pointed at him and you reached out and grasped it, deciding to just hold his hand so people wouldn’t think they were being talked about, “He obviously knows what he’s fucking doing!”

You couldn’t help but laugh at him and his excited little ramble, “It’s just crazy that in a few weeks we’re not just gonna be known by the fifty fans that come see our shows every now and then. I just…we don’t know how to repay you for putting your ass on the line for us.”

His gaze moved from Taehyung back down to you, choosing to give the top of your head a kiss. The gesture was sweet and made your heart swell while also making a slight blush rise on your cheeks so you wrapped both of your arms around him to bury your face in his chest so he wouldn’t see how easily affected you were.

“Okay Y/N, last two to shoot are Jungkook and Hoseok.” Ildo the talented photographer of the day called out to you. He had finished shooting Taehyung and was now moving to sit behind his monitor and review the shots he had just taken. You and Jungkook walked over to stand behind him and beside Taehyung who was looking at the monitor in awe at the shots just taken.

“Wow, I can just hear the panties dropping at these shots.”

Jungkook reached over and smacked his shoulder as they laughed loudly, the pair of them starting to bring up inside jokes that you knew nothing about. You scooted a bit closer to Ildo as you both flicked through the images. “These are gonna look super nice. We’re doing the group shot last right?”

“Thanks Ildo, you’re amazing and yeah we’ll save that one for the end.”

Jungkook was guided to the white backdrop, one of the hair stylists fidgeting with his hair for a moment before deeming him decent and retreating back to allow his shoot to begin. He had the same leopard blanket Taehyung had on draped over his shoulders for a few of the pictures. Whether or not they were models they were very handsome men that knew the sex appeal they carried with them, that was obviously thanks to the women that went to their shows and fawned over them, and you were extremely grateful for that because your boss would’ve thrown these in the garbage if they screamed amature.

Ildo easily instructed him on how to tilt his head and where to look for the shot to come out nicely and before you knew it you were halfway through Hoseok's shot. Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook were standing around goofing off while they waited for him to finish because the final group shot was next.

“I need to fix my instagram theme.” Jimin mumbled out, tapping filters he couldn’t decide between on a selfie of his.

“Why?”

He frowned at the photo, not sure if he liked it enough to post yet so he passed it over to Jungkook, “Because no one wants to follow you if your theme fucking sucks Taehyung.”

Taehyung looked completely confused, pulling his phone out to open up the instagram app. He tapped on his own page and scrolled down and back up, “I never realized?”

Jungkook handed the phone back to Jimin, “Yeah post it, it looks good. And Tae, that’s because your instagram is amazing without you even trying.”

Taehyung continued to scroll through his own photos, a small pout on his face as he craned his head over to see Jimin's instagram page from his phone.

“You have like a weird art hoe meets alternative vibe going on.” That caught your attention so you made a mental note to bring it up during your interview later.

“Thanks I think?”

All of you turned your head around to focus on Hoseok when you heard excessive clapping and excited screams coming from him, signaling the end of his shoot. You rubbed your palms together and grinned at the boys, “Alright, almost done guys. Just a few shots of you together and we can go get some food in our system before we figure out the interview.”

They all shot you a thumbs up before making their way back towards the lit up backdrop, all of them acting a lot more casual with being in front of the camera now that they were a group.

The shoot wrapped up fairly quickly after that, you shouting out thanks to the entire crew and the guys joining in as everyone gathered their things. Jimin had suggested you guys go to this new pizza spot near by, saying he invited the others to join in if that was fine.

You honestly didn’t mind it, as long as you were able to get a page written on them during this outing it didn’t matter who was there.

Jungkook fished his keys out of his pocket, jingling them in front of everyone before approaching his thirsty car. “Shotgun!” Taehyung yelled before bolting to the passenger side, not getting a chance to throw it open since Jungkook clicked the lock button.

“You wish.”

“That’s his wet dream’s seat Taehyung.”

They both started cackling when Jungkook sent them daggers for eyes. “Am I the wet dream?” You teased, giving him a smirk as you pressed your hand to your chest acting like you were flattered.

“Yes!” Shouted both Tae and Jimin, Jungkook only mumbling a timid yeah.

“Kinky. I’ll take it.”

Day One Hundred & Thirty-three

You were currently in your building’s conference room, your thoughts going a million miles a minute as you adjusted the giant blow ups of the mock spread you were in charge of.

The next months issue was dropping in a few days and considering your boss had been out of town for two weeks, if she didn’t approve of it she would scrap it, maybe fire you for pulling out amateur work and then go for the backup spread that one of your coworkers was told to provide just in case.

You tucked in your floral button up and adjusted the cuffed sleeves for the final time before taking a deep breath and plastering a smile on your face as everyone who was in charge of your job walked in, your boss being the last one.

“Good morning everyone!”

Everyone was shuffling into their seats but spoke a greeting in return, their attention automatically going to the huge posters behind you.

“Are you ready to impress me Y/N?” Your boss, Mijoo’s voice cut through the room, a smile on her face as she looked at you.

She may be extremely bossy, and strict, and sometimes bitchy but you couldn’t argue with the fact that she knew what she was doing and she put her trust in you so that had to count for something.

“Yes, of course!” You cleared your throat and stepped to your left, fully letting your spread show behind you.

“With winter approaching us it’s obvious to step away from fresh and inviting looks in fashion, everyone wants to bundle up and stay warm but something about the same old burgundy scarves and black trench coats is very–“

“Last year.” Mijoo cut in and you nodded in agreement with her, everyone else in the room nodding along.

“Exactly, I think we can switch it up by gravitating towards a more alternative look for winter.” You gestured towards the group photo of Bangtan on the first poster, they were clad in layers and boots.

“It would be a nice switch from the typical cutesy fashion worn for winter, it will give us an edge compared to other magazines. This style is meant for layering, it looks very messy but every article has purpose and it feels like every outfit has a story that comes with it.”

Mijoo stood from her seat and walked over, her gaze on the posters and not at you. She was intrigued, that much you could tell. She stood in front of what would be the first page, a compilation edited like polaroids of the four of them with their signatures under their respective picture, “It has an edge to it, and it’s very androgynous.”

You stepped aside as she continued to make her way through every photo, her eyes skimming the words you wrote with an approving look on her face, “Who are they?”

Her light brown eyes looked directly at you this time and you almost choked on your spit from trying to speak so fast, “A band, Bangtan. I know we never cover music artists but when I saw them perform live their sense of style combined with their sound is what really drew me in. I feel like this sense of fashion is heavily influenced by the artists who really birthed it so it just seemed right to have the focus of the spread be people who really live and breathe this.”

“Interesting.” Was all she said, taking a few steps back to see the spread in full with her hands crossed in front of her, “Were these the only pictures shot?”

“No, there’s still plenty of single and group shots that didn’t make the cut.” You were reaching for your phone to open up dropbox and show her but the sound of her own cell going off stopped you.

She reached into her pocket and fished it out, looking at the screen in annoyance before answering with a What? You looked away from her, giving your own work a look of pride because damn were you proud of this spread. Directing everything on your own and managing to put together a team that brought your vision to life really made you feel like you had found your niche.

“Well, pass a few photos you deem worthy of being cover material over to Sunmi and we’ll have it finalized and ready for production in a few days. If the general public is as intrigued by this as I am then you’ll be seeing more opportunities like this in the future. Good work Y/N.”

And with that she was walking out of the conference room, everyone else calling out a good job as well before packing up and leaving you standing there with your jaw basically on the floor. She not only loved your spread but she deemed it cover material, that was big for not only you but Bangtan as well and you couldn’t wait to let Jungkook know.

Your fingers were shaking so hard as you sat in your car with your phone in your hands, your contact list was lighting up the screen while you scrolled through it to find his name and when you finally did you pressed your finger down so hard on his name you were surprised your screen didn’t crack.

C’mon, c’mon…

“Y/N!” He shouted your name out in greeting, and you couldn’t help the giant smile that came across your face.

“Jungkook!”

“What’s up Butterfly?” You could hear the faint sounds of drums in the background, making it pretty clear he was currently practicing with the rest of the guys.

“Are you with the others?”

Shuffling was heard through the phone and from how clear his voice sounded you could tell he had his palm cupped over the microphone, “Why? Is this your way of initiating phone sex? Should I go somewhere alone?”

“Oh my god are you guys about to have phone sex?” Taehyung shouts out, having heard Jungkook’s hushed words from beside him. A deep laugh fills the air as he dodges a punch aimed at his stomach, running away towards Jimin with his bass hanging low on his shoulders.

Your face instantly went red as you let out a small scream followed by laughter, “No! And that’s not how I would initiate phone sex, c’mon romance isn’t dead-” Jungkook starts apologizing immediately, “I would obviously send some kind of nude before calling.” And the apology was over and now he was joining in on your laughter.

“I’ll keep that in mind for next time, but to answer your question, yes I’m with the guys.”

“Cool, put me on speaker!”

Jungkook was confused by that but said okay regardless and did just that. His phone was held in his right hand as he waved them all closer together, Jimin and Taehyung had been fucking around with their instrument making a parody of a The 1975 song as Hoseok recorded them with a smile on his face.

“Hey!” He shouted out obnoxiously, a giant smile on his face as he watched his friends have fun. They all turned to him, Jimin falling to his knees as he played a random guitar solo with his head tilted back and a cheeky smile. “Y/N’s on the phone, she has something she needs to tell us.”

The last notes Jimin played echoed out in the room as they all quieted down, that honestly made them just a tad bit nervous and they were kind of assuming that you were going to inform them that their spread had been cut. Nonetheless they all gathered around the phone as Jungkook raised it up and told you they were ready for whatever news you had.

“Alright,” you began, trying not to let too much of the excitement seep out of your voice, “you know how I told you guys I was going to be in charge of a spread for next months issue?” They all hummed in agreement, Taehyung chewing on his fingernails while Hoseok continued to record with his phone.

“Well, about that. Uhm, how would you guys feel if maybe instead of that-” their hearts instantly dropped for a moment, “we make you guys the cover of next month’s issue too?”

All of them looked at each other in a state of shock, Jungkook screaming are you fucking serious into the phone while Jimin dropped to the floor with his hands over his head, Taehyung walking around the room with his hands in the same position and a smile on his face as Hoseok hopped around and recorded the whole thing.

Your laughed mixed into the sounds in their room over the phone, “Yes I’m serious! My boss loved the spread and told me to send our editor some more shots of you guys to make a cover for the issue. So get ready to see your faces plastered all over Korea on February 1st!”

Day One Hundred & Sixty

“Why are you staring at me like that?” Jungkook questioned as he stood in your doorway, a black leather jacket framing his body, a sliver of his dark red printed button up peeking out between the zipper.

You weren’t staring at him, you were just admiring him entirely, especially his new hair which he had decided to dye a bright red. “Because you’re fucking hot Jungkook.”

A bashful smile took over his face and he let his gaze fall to the floor before trying to play it off, “You’re one to talk, also, why do our outfits kind of match?”

You also had on a pair of black jeans, a thick belt around your waist and a dark printed button up tucked into them with a leather jacket in your arms. “Haven’t you heard? This group called Bangtan says this is totally in right now.”

Both of you were currently on your way to the nearest magazine stand to pick up as many copies of it as you could, a copy for both of you to frame as memorabilia, some copies for Jungkook's family, a few for them to toss out at an upcoming show they have, and some more for safe keeping.

Your eyes were a little dry due to the fact that you could barely sleep, tossing and turning the entire night with butterflies in your stomach at the thought of your first spread dropping today, but you were so full of excitement, mostly for Jungkook. The look in his eyes was one of achievement, this was something he and the guys only dreamed of and to have it happen was like a daydream he never wanted to end.

“So,” Jungkook started off, his hand reaching out and intertwining his fingers with yours, “heard any good feedback yet?”

Your thumb rubbed the back of his hand gently, “Yes actually! I got a couple of articles linked to me of other fashion outlets talking about you guys and mentioning our interview. So far everyone loves you guys.”

That just made his heart burst in his chest, he could only imagine what his mom was thinking as she sat in her cozy little house in Busan, maybe she had stumbled upon the magazine spread or an article on her own before Jungkook could surprise her but he was hoping that wasn’t the case, he wanted to have this moment with her.

“This is so...wild to me.” He spoke softly, his eyes downcast and a bashful smile on his face as you guys exit your building. “You know that feeling when things finally start to fall into place and you catch yourself thinking that this is it?”

You nodded at that, squeezing his hand in reassurance, “That’s what I feel like right now. Fuck, thats what all of us feel right now. We’ve been dreaming of this for years and the fact that you gave us this opportunity is beyond me.”

That warmed your chest up, you had only known Jungkook for a short amount of time but he had grown into someone special in your life. Every now and then you stumble into someone that makes everything click and he was that person. You wanted to make him happy, going out of your way to just make him smile and this opportunity did all that and more.

The rest of the walk was spent in silence, Jungkook getting slightly more nervous as you both approached the magazine stand and you felt like you wanted to barf already. You could see the stand in the distance, a small crowd gathered around it to buy the new magazines and you were praying you would hear some good feedback.

“Good morning.” You greeted the old man stood by the magazines, he greeted you with a smile while he checked out a group of teenage girls.

“Wait,” one of them whispered before looking down at the magazine, “that looks like him.”

Her friend looked down as well before looking back up at Jungkook, a small gasp leaving her mouth. “Excuse me!” They called out, tapping Jungkook on the shoulder and bringing him out of his own daze as he stared at his face on a magazine cover.

“Can you sign this!” Jungkook’s eyes bulged out, almost expecting them to say they were joking but when they stuck out their magazines with giddy expressions he realized they were being serious. You stood beside him with a smile, your phone coming out to take a sneaky picture of this moment because you were sure he would want this memory to be photographed.

Jungkook’s shaky hands took the sharpie the old man handed him and scribbled out the signature he had been practicing for years, bold strokes of his name on the glossy paper making a feeling of pride taking over when the girls thanked him excitedly and walked away.

That feeling of being on cloud nine lasted the entire time you guys trekked to the makeshift practice room the guys had in some random shop, a bunch of magazines being clutched in your hands and nearly spilling out when you guys entered the room.

“Holy shit!” Taehyung laughed out, your eyes drifted around the room until you spotted him and you burst out laughing because he was sat surrounded by his own pile of magazines.

“I guess we all had the same idea then huh?” Jimin spoke out, he was sitting criss crossed on the floor with the magazine opened up to their spread.

Apparently so, because all of you had a pile of magazines to share, to keep and just for the sake of having. This was meaningful memorabilia, something you all could hopefully look back at years from now, when you were all successful in your own way, and see the moment where it all seemed to take off.

“I honestly want to plaster a hundred copies on my bedroom wall as makeshift wallpaper.” Hoseok spoke as he flipped through the pages containing the interview, his eyes skimming the words typed on the paper, eyes squinting as he recalls the way you all had bantered throughout it.

“Oh my god, imagine when you bring a girl over and she sees hundreds of you staring back at her on the bed.” Taehyung snickered out as he took a photo of a magazine against the patterned rug he was on top of.

Jungkook giggled to himself before telling you he was going to facetime his mom and walking to a far corner of the room.

Jimin was sorting through a bag he had beside him, pulling out a flyer and handing it to you with a grin on his face. It was a red flyer, the words Hope World on the top with the date right beside it, June 26th.

“We’re headlining this festival with our friends. We actually had this planned before the whole magazine spread but tickets dropped today so this timing is perfect.”

Underneath the title was a group picture that hadn’t made the cut for the magazine spread, all of them looking absolutely amazing. Right beside them was a photo of Jin, the last time you had seen him he was drunk as fuck and not as put together but you couldn’t deny the fact that he was handsome. And right underneath him was a photo of Yoongi, someone you remember meeting at the halloween party, the name Agust D being right below him.

“We actually got a call a few minutes ago saying that tickets sales went through the roof and just sold out.”

You finally looked up from the flyer and met Jimin’s eyes, creased into half moons from excitement. “Holy shit, really?”

“Y/N, we weren’t expecting to get close to hitting capacity and today we get a call saying its completely sold out.” Taehyung interrupted, a giddy smile on his face.

“Obviously we aren’t Coachella over here expecting over half a million people but considering who we are we never thought it’d sell out.”

At that, Jungkook walked back over, dabbing his cheeks lightly as he slid his phone back into his pockets. “Sell out what?” He asked curiously, sliding his arm across your shoulder.

“Hope World Fest dude!” Hoseok shouted.

“Wait what?”

He slid his phone back out and called someone frantically, chewing on his bottom lip as he waiting for whoever it was to answer.

“Namjoon!” He shouted into the receiver making everyone flinch and the person on the other end chuckle, the sound filling up the small space through Jungkook’s speaker.

“Hey JK, what’s up man?”

“Don’t whats up me, did we really sell out Hope World Fest?”

Namjoon only laughed again, “Sure did. Sells went through the roof this morning.”

Jungkook could only stare at the floor, the shock rendering him speechless. His mind was currently going into overdrive. This was all happening too fast he felt like he was going to puke everything up.

His band mates felt the exact same, they’ve had this band since the last year of high school. They were used to playing house shows, the occasional club and bar but never a festival. The closest they had gotten to playing a show similar in size would be the one time they opened up for a band called The Rose but that had been a year or so back before they blew up.

When Namjoon first spoke of creating this festival a little over a year ago they never thought they’d be a headliner. Namjoon knew everyone, he had so many massive bands and solo artists and rappers on the bill for the festival but he always insisted on having them headline. And when the news that you’d be writing about them for your magazine came up he was sold on the idea.

Seeing everything come full circle like it was right now was too surreal.

“JK? Uh...can you guys confirm he still has a pulse?”

Jimin stood up and plucked the device from Jungkook’s hands, pressing it closer to his lips instead, “He’s breathing, might be in shock but he’ll be alright.”

“Okay good,” he laughed, “by the way, all the travel arrangements to Busan are set i’ll send you all the itinerary. Is Y/N there?”

“Yeah, I’m here!” You nervously spoke up.

“Oh, hey! I wasn’t sure if you’d be able to make it but there's an extra flight ticket with your name on it if you decide to go.”

You thanked him and let him say his goodbyes, Jimin handing you the phone with a smile before going back to what he was doing. You slid it into the front pocket on his jeans, giving his cheek a tiny poke to make him come back to reality. His nose crinkled up at the action, a smile spreading across his face as he cupped both your cheeks in return and planted an obnoxious kiss against your lips.

The both of you lingered in the practice room for another hour, talks of the show they played a few days back that you missed due to work, all of them taking turns to show you whatever footage fans had captured of the show, the boys going through their social media, having mini freak outs as they saw their followers increase before their eyes. There was just something about witnessing this moment in their life that filled you with happiness, the sparkle in all of their eyes as they watched views of their music videos increase every few minutes. It was absolutely priceless and made it so much harder to leave once you finally said your goodbyes, leaving the room with your hands clasped together and the biggest smiles on your face.

Your phone vibrates just as you reach Jungkook’s car once more, a small feeling of anxiety bubbles in the pit of your stomach when you pull the device out and see Mijoo’s name on your screen. It’s a short and simple message, Amazing spread, great feedback. Keep it up Y/N.

Jungkook sees you grinning to yourself, pressing the device to your chest lightly before locking it again and placing it on your lap. “Good news?”

You nod at that, “Yeah, my boss just sent me a good job text.”

“I’m telling you, she secretly loves you and her world would fall apart if you weren’t there to help her. This is just her moment of realization.” He’s giving you the cutest smile, and he’s about to keep going, already having a novel ready to gush about how amazing you are at your job but his phone sounds off next.

He hesitates to answer but you motion for him to accept the call so he does. He has to place the call on speaker since he’s started to drive already, “JK?” A voice fills the sound of the car.

“Yugyeom, whats up brother?”

A laugh sounds out from the speaker, “What do you mean whats up, your face is plastered all around Seoul from what I can see. Can’t walk more than 30 feet without seeing all of you on a magazine stand or on some girls phone screen.”

At that, you can’t control the smile that spreads across your face, looking to the side and seeing Jungkook once again had the giddiest expression on his face. “What can I say? There’s no escaping me.”

Yugyeom laughs again, “Honestly how did you guys manage to pull this off?”

Theres a beat of silence, Jungkook nibbling on his lip before his arm reaches over the center console and rests on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze, “It’s all thanks to my girlfriend.” You can practically hear the intake of breath from the other line, no doubt Yugyeom was about to start firing questions out before Jungkook interjected, “Who can hear everything you’re saying because you’re on speaker.”

“Noted.” You laugh quietly to yourself, “well tell your girlfriend-”

“Y/N.” He interrupted again.

“Y/N, right, tell Y/N she’s currently winning the title of best girlfriend. Anyways, I gotta go. I’ll see you in Busan?”

Jungkook confirmed he would and ended the call, suddenly looking very nervous and you know why. Your hands comes down to grasp his thats still on your thigh, you slip your fingers underneath his palm and weave your fingers together, “So, I’m your girlfriend now huh?”

And now his face is warming up, a soft blush creeping onto his cheeks in embarrassment. If he’s being honest, he’s been calling you his girlfriend to all of his friends for a few weeks now even though he hasn’t technically asked.

He lifts your clasped hands and brings them to his lips, planting a gentle kiss on the back of your hand before bringing them back down to rest on the center console, “Please?” He very cutely mumbles out.

“Jungkook, I’d love to be your girlfriend.”

His body sags into the drivers seat in relief, his head falling back momentarily, “Thank god because I kinda told my mom you were my girlfriend already when I face timed her earlier.”

That just makes this warmth blossom in your chest and slowly spread throughout your whole body and you can only giggle to yourself as you give his hand another squeeze and enjoy the drive back to your place.

When you finally do get to your place Jungkook instantly orders take out before saying he’ll be back right back, choosing to go to the convenience store right outside your apartment complex because you both really need alcohol to properly celebrate this magazine spread.

Its still relatively early in the day, the sun only starting to set but you decide to get comfy. You switch into an oversized dark grey shirt and a pair of shorts that your shirt manages to cover and when Jungkook walks back in with bags of alcohol he acknowledges it, “Is this your way of tempting me?”

You look down at your exposed legs, lifting your shirt up slightly to show your shorts with a smile, “Are you telling me its this easy to tempt you?”

He grunts as he sets the bags down on your kitchen table, never taking his eyes off you, “When its you tempting me of course.”

“Mm,” you hum to yourself in thought, plopping onto the couch with a grin, slowly inching your shirt up to once again expose more of your legs, “so then should I throw away all the lingerie I have?”

You only laugh harder when his eyes bulge out, his hands already coming up to protest when your intercom system buzzes to inform you of your delivery downstairs. Jungkook tries to sputter out a sentence in defense but you just point at the intercom, “Can you let him in please?”

He groans and nods before buzzing the delivery man inside the building. He wants to pounce on you at this very moment, you’re just sitting there with your legs folded in front of you, looking comfortable and nonchalant but your thighs are teasing him and he just wants to bite and lick his way up them to your center.

It’s not until your front door buzzes that he’s snapped out of his wet dream of defiling you on your couch. Jungkook begrudgingly turns around and opens the door, you’re covered by the slab of wood so the delivery man is none the wiser to the fact that you’re now lifting your hips up to drag your shorts off of your body.

The sound of rustling has Jungkook turning around, his eyes widening up when you kick off the fabric, your shirt now pulled up to your stomach, showcasing the cute black panties you were currently wearing. When your fingers hook around them as well, Jungkook chokes and closes the door some more to further shield you.

You hold back the laugh you desperately want to let out when you hear him nervously talking to the man, hurrying up the transaction and shutting the door just as you finish sliding off the cotton material off of your legs.

With the door now shut, Jungkook fully turns to you now, your legs are resting innocently on your coffee table, your finger trailing up and down your thigh and over your stomach. The way your legs are placed he can’t see your exposed core but just knowing you’re bare from the waist down has his blood rushing to his cock and he groans.

The bags in his hands rustle as he rushes to set them on top of your table, giving you a glare because you’re not playing fair. How do you expect him to focus on this food now with you sitting on the couch, you’re the only meal he feels like devouring at the moment.

“You’re playing dirty.”

“Am I?” You question with a smile, eyes following him as he rounds the table to get closer to you. His eyes are boring into yours now, a small shake of his head is the only answer he gives you when he reaches the coffee table. Its the only piece of furniture separating you two so he has no qualms about gripping the edge of it and yanking it back completely.

A gasp leaves your lips when your feet thunk onto the floor, the wooden material being yanked away from you as Jungkook hauled it back with a grunt. Now that its no longer in the way he stands inches from you, looking down at your slouched frame, the material of your shirt had slid back down to cover you up and that just wouldn’t do.

You watch on silently when he drops to his knees in front of you, his lips curling up into a smirk when his fingers touch your skin, gently rubbing the skin above your knees and chuckling when your skin breaks out in goosebumps.

“What are you doing?” Your voice is barely a whisper, waiting to see what he would do next. The way he’s staring at you makes that obvious but you needed him to say something first.

His fingers reach the hem of your shirt, toying with the fabric, “I’m going to eat, if thats okay with you.”

He lifts his gaze from your skin back to your eyes, a smile gracing his face when you nod your head at him, “Yeah, perfectly okay.”

Thats all he needs, a squeal leaving you when his hands hook underneath your thighs and yank you down further until your butt reached the edge of the couch, your shirt bunching up around you and giving him a small peak of your center.

Your fingers instinctively grip your shirt, tugging the material higher up your body to give him a clear view. A teasing smirk is sent his way when he looks up at you, his eyes narrowing in accusation, “Like I said, you’re not playing fair.”

“Fair shmair, or should we actually eat our chicken before it gets cold?” Jungkook pouts at you even though he knows you’re just poking fun, a scoff leaving his lips when you bring your foot closer to nudge your toes against his chest with a giggle.

“I’m inches from your pussy, wanting to make you feel good, amazing even, and you wanna think about chicken?” He huffs playfully.

One of your hands leaves from its place holding your shirt, reaching forward to slip through his newly dyed red strands, twisting a chunk of it until it curls on his head.

Being the ever competitive person he is, he does you one better, his finger coming up to pinch the skin of your thigh like a child, a smile replacing the adorable pout on his lips when you yelp in shock, your hand moving to swat at his.

“Ow! Now who’s not playing fair?”

Adding insult to injury he has the audacity to snort, “Fair shmair, wanna make you feel good.”

A laugh spills out of you when he starts obnoxiously pressing sloppy kisses onto your thighs, the small huffs of his added laughter hitting your skin as he trails up towards your center, “Jungkook!” You chortle, squirming around from the ticklish feeling.

It’s not until the the sloppy kisses turn into gentle licks, then a soft suck as he reaches your clit that the tone of his name turns into a soft sigh instead.

“Oh, Jungkook.” It comes out playful, a low rasp in your voice as you sigh out and let your body sag into your cushions. He hums in content, his tongue swirling around your clit in a tantalizing manner. His eyes move up to stare at you and sees that your head is pushed back into the dark blue fabric of your couch, your eyes shut and a cheeky smile on your face due to his ministrations.

The chicken was definitely out of your mind now, a victory for Jungkook if he’d say so himself.

His hands haul your thighs higher onto his shoulders, his fingers urging you to tighten your hold on him, push your heels into his back, anything at all and you don’t disappoint.

Your thighs grip the sides of his head a little tighter as you groan out at the way his tongue slithers between your folds, the subtle roll of your hips being welcomed by him as he dragged the flat of his tongue up your slit, collecting the arousal that coated your lips.

One of his hands comes forward, his fingers spreading your folds apart as he spits onto your pussy, his saliva coating your folds as he rubs his spit around. A surprised moan fills the air when he sucks your clit back into his mouth, savoring the way you taste on his tongue. His hands grip your thighs tighter as he hums against you, his lips puckered around your skin as he sucks gently.

“Hmm, is this your way of trying to secure another cover spread?” You tease, your eyes opening up to stare at him while your heels push him closer to you with a giggle.

Jungkook pulls away with a wet smack, his lips glimmering as he grins at you, “That depends, is it working?”

“I don’t know,” you shrug, bringing your hand back to his hair to twirl another strand. His eyes flutter shut when you give a soft tug, goosebumps flaring on his body at the sensation, “maybe.”

He lets himself bask in the feeling of you playing with his hair, ignoring the way you impatiently press your heels into the middle of his back. For someone who was trying to act like you weren’t affected, you were doing a pretty shit job at it.

“Jungkook.” You finally whine, the pleading tone in your voice making his lip curl up into a smirk, his eyes opening up and squinting at you.

“What?” He jokes, softly blowing cool air onto your exposed pussy and smiling like a child when it made a shiver run through your body. “Do you not wanna eat the chicken now then or?” He continues, eyes full of mischief thinking you’re about to start begging him.

But oh no, you weren’t a begger, if you wanted something you’d go out and grab it for yourself. So thats exactly what you do, loosening your legs from his shoulders and reaching forward to hook your hands underneath his armpits. Theres a split second of confusion that clouds his face when you recklessly haul him up from between your legs as if his muscle mass was something you could easily drag around.

Jungkook takes a brief moment to acknowledge how hot it was that you were manhandling him around, but only a moment because with the way you yank him up his hand clambers onto the back of the sofa as to no crush you when you force him nearly on top of you. The look on your face has a laugh threatening to escape him when he sees the clear frustration etched onto your features.

“Shut up about the chicken.” You growl, cupping his face and yanking it towards your own, your lips slotting together in a messy kiss. Jungkook wants to laugh, so badly, but the way your tongue slips into his mouth, softly wrapping around his own before pulling back and sucking on his lower lip, the laughter fizzles away.

“Baby,” he tries to mumble in between kisses, his free hand scoping underneath you to try to haul you up from the awkward position you’ve put the two of you in, “Y/N.” He tries again, being muffled by the way you squish his cheeks, his lips puckers out in a way that almost prevents him from kissing you back but that doesn’t stop you from planting them on him as if you’ll never be able to again.

“Butterfly,” he attempts a third time, the word being almost indecipherable but you hear that loud and clear, pulling half an inch away from his swollen lips with a hum of interest, your eyes half lidded and locked on his.

“Here, let me,” he scoops you up and properly arranges you on the couch, your head resting on the cushion by the arm rest while he slots on top of you.

That laugh of his finally bubbles out when you impatiently try to go back to kissing him, his nose scrunching up when your lips miss his mouth entirely, landing on his cheek messily, “You’d rather make out than have me eat your pussy?” He quips, letting his resolve crumble when he starts to kiss you back.

It’s a change of pace, gentle presses of his lips against yours, simmering down the urgency you feel inside until its a slow roll of the tides crashing in. He feels the way you smile against him, your left leg hooking over his hip and bringing him flush to you, “I’d rather fuck you.”

Oh.

Jungkook hums against your mouth, this wouldn’t be the first time you two were intimate, having been on the receiving end of pleasure a few times, during the movie nights you would have and he’d somehow find himself between your legs halfway through whatever motion picture you decided to put on. Jungkook was absolutely a giver, loving to see you falling apart at the hands of him. But this felt different, with you acting so desperate as if you weren’t trying to play hard to get minutes ago, with your lust filled eyes and kiss swollen lips.

It’s not lost on Jungkook, but he loves it too much to comment on it. Loves the way you rut your hips against his, the friction of his jeans on your exposed core making you groan against his mouth in an almost filthy way.

And god does he want to make you feel good, you’ve done so much for him, became such an important part of his life in the span of knowing each other. The infinite amount of selfless acts you’ve done for him is more than he thinks he could ever repay you for, but if you wanted to fuck him then that was a good enough place to start.

“Are you sure?” he manages to ask in between your assault of kisses, the teasing tone to his voice is gone now so you pull back from him, letting him properly catch his breath as he stares down at you.

His wide eyes bore into yours, searching for any sense of hesitation but he finds none. A nod of your head confirms that, your fingers softly caressing the skin of his cheeks as you grin, “Yeah I’m sure, I want you Jungkook.”

Jungkook smiles at that, eyes crinkling up in the most endearing way, “You have me Butterfly.” The sweet nickname he had given you months ago makes you smile right back at him, a silent conversation passing between the two of you as you stare at each other inches apart.

You had him, he was yours, and you knew he meant it.

It becomes a flurry of clothes right after, Jungkook stripping out of the layers he has on with your help, his jacket being tossed behind your couch while you nearly popped the buttons off of his top in your haste to take it off, the red material joining the heap of growing garments on the floor.

“Fuck,” You sigh dreamily when he yanks his pants down, his broad thighs coming out into the world and its almost insulting that he has them caged inside denim all day. A phrase you had told Jungkook months ago pops back into your mind, you mentioned his thighs made great cushions, “wanna ride them.”

That makes Jungkook pause, one leg free from its confines while the other ankle was trapped at the end, the damn skinny jeans being a battle to take off. “What?”

“Your thighs, wanna ride them. Make myself cum on them.”

Jungkook doesn’t know if he hit his head and was currently dreaming because that has to be the absolute hottest words he has ever heard come out of your mouth. The image of you rutting against his thighs, desperate to get yourself off, maybe wearing one of his baggy band shirts as you did so made his aching cock twitch in his briefs.

A short giggle leaves you when you notice it, “You liked that huh?”

He glares at you as he yanks his pants off his trapped ankle, balling them up and tossing the jeans down like a basketball, now standing in just his black briefs, his cock tenting the fabric of it.

“Y/N,” he whines with a pout as he steps closer to you once more, “you can’t say that shit to me.”

Another laugh bubbles out, your hands hooking under the hem of your shirt and sliding the loose material off of your body. Its discarded behind you without a care, your tits out on full display as you stretch across your couch teasingly, “Why?”

He groans at the way you’re sprawled out, arms lifted above your head casually with your back slightly arched to allow you to rest your head on the arm rest. Jungkook thought if the phrase paint me like one of your french girls held any real meaning to him it would come to play in this very moment. He wanted to capture this image and hang it on his living room wall, a tangible memory of just how delectable you looked.

“Because, now all I’m thinking about is how hot that would be.”

You make grabby hands at him after he slides out of his underwear, as if you’ve tied an invisible rope to his body and guided him to you, Jungkook makes his way closer. His cock is fully free now, bobbing slightly when he reaches the couch, but he doesn't go further than that. Instead his hands scoop under you, hauling you up much like you had done to him earlier, your knees folded over one arm while the other cradled your upper back.

“Jungkook!” You shout in surprise, your hand cupping his chest in an attempt to stabilize yourself from the sudden action.

“I’m not fucking you for the first time on your couch–“

“But it's made of velvet.” You joke, laughing when he rolls his eyes at you with a smile.

“Even more of a reason not to, good luck cleaning up whatever ungodly fluids get on it.”

He carries you across the living room, his foot nudging open your bedroom door, the eclectic style of your living room flowing into this space as well and Jungkook smiles to himself at how prominent your personality lies within your home.

“How dirty.” You jest, laughing when he drops you onto your bed, your hands propping yourself up to stare at him as he kneels onto the bed after you.

Jungkook smirks at you as he crawls towards you, a soft laugh filling the air when he sees you slowly inch back from him, “You think thats dirty?” His eyebrows cock up as he inches closer, enjoying the way you bite your lower lip as you take him in, “Just wait until I’m done with you Butterfly.”

The way Jungkook says that, with his eyes glazing over with lust, the tip of his tongue running along the bottom of his teeth as he prowls forward, sounds promising. You knew Jungkook had a way with his mouth but he seemed extra determined today to make you feel good, maybe it was the overwhelming joy he felt about the cover spread but you didn’t mind it.

“Mm, show me.” One hand comes up towards his shoulders, his proximity allowing your fingertips to trail along his skin down onto his chest, tracing the simple script he has marked on it.

“You actually gonna let me this time?”

You purse your lips, slowly leaning back until you’re once again flat on the bed, Jungkook hovering over you with his hands sinking into the mattress on either side of you.

“Yeah, i’ll let you.”

His head tilts slightly at your words, a curious smile gracing his lips in an almost taunting way. Jungkook clearly had something up his sleeve and when he decides to flop onto his side next to you, with his head near your headboard and that same smile spreading further across his face, it spells it out for you.

“Come here then.” He motions with his hands, slight rolls of his fingers in a come hither action leading you to his face and you have never wanted anything more.

You crawl over to him, swing your left leg over his body until your core is hovering above his face, your position allowing you to see the way his hard cock rests against his stomach.

Jungkook’s fingers trail up your thighs until they reach the juncture of where they meet your hips, softly digging into your flesh as he eases you down towards his awaiting mouth.

The small sighs of his breath hit your skin, a feeling of exhilaration spreading throughout you at being in this position with him. His thumb softly caresses your skin as he pulls you even closer, his nose nudging against your folds slightly. A soft whimper is let out when his tongue trails up your slit, short and gentle licks swirling around your clit to get you started.

When his tongue parts your folds, softly sinking into your entrance, you hunch forward, your arms seeking purchase on his hips to hold you steady. The noisy ways he slurps at your cunt, licking up any ounce of wetness coating your folds and dripping out of you has you moaning out, your jaw dropping slightly as he tugs you further onto his face.

Jungkook is lost in you, surrounded by your scent and the way you taste on his tongue, the soft moans of his name filling his ears and lulling him into a trance as he pleasure you, he doesn’t register the way you lean forward. Your sights were set on his cock, a small puddle of precum pooling around his tip, a soft shade of pink with the prettiest veins surrounding it. It was just beginning to find its place in your mouth.

The weight of it feels heavy in your hand as you wrap your fingers around it, the slight throbbing you feel being a clear indicator of just how much he enjoyed pleasing you.

He groans against your cunt when you give him an experimental pump, your fingers wrapping around the base of his length, a slight twist in your wrist as you come up towards his tip. The leaking beads of precum coat your palm, leaving a sticky trail in its path as you repeat the motion once more, the slight huffs of breath are felt against you as Jungkook tries to focus on you and you only.

Its not until he feels the softness of your lips against his tip that he finally pulls away from your dripping core, “Butterfly what are you doing?” He rasps out, his fingers digging into your flesh harder when you pop the tip of his aching cock into your mouth, soft kitten like licks on his mushroom head that has his stomach caving in.

“Making you feel good too.” Is all you mumble out before taking him all the way in. He feels like the wind gets knocked out of him when you sink fully down in one go, the tip of his length nudging against the back of your throat with no signs of resistance from you and Jungkook groans.

His head is thrown back against your pillows at the feeling of your warm mouth enveloping his entire cock, the wet noises following suit only making his toes curl. You suckle his length when you slide back up, hollowing your cheeks to suck for a moment before sinking back down with a wet slurp.

“Fuck.” He groans out, lifting his head back up to once again meet your center.

His lips wrap around your messy clit, giving a harsh suck as one of his hands trails off your thigh and towards your center. His fingers circle your entrance, coated in a film of your arousal before he sinks a digit in, feeling your walls tighten around it as he starts to thrust into you, intent on stretching you open for his cock. You were absolutely soaked, his mouth covered in your wetness and he wanted to drown in you, with your thighs caging him in as you quivered on top of him.

A small hiss leaves your mouth when he sinks a second finger in, scissoring them apart before fucking them into you with more purpose, distracting you enough to pop off of his cock, leaving your fingers wrapped around it loosely as you hunch forward. Your oncoming release creeps up on you, making every nerve in your body tingle as you feel it building up.

“Jungkook, fuck-” You whine out, a subtle roll of your hips starting up that he welcomes whole heartedly, “I’m cumming, shit-” his fingers urge you to roll onto his tongue faster as he uses his other hand to continue fucking into you. A final roll of his tongue against your bundle of nerves is what sends you over the edge, a sob of his name filling the air as you cum.

Your knees give out on you, dropping you further onto his face but he has no complaints, moaning in content and continuing to slurp against your pussy, his tongue flicking against your clit as you come down, your skin prickling with pleasure as the sparks spread out on your body.

Jungkook slips his fingers out of you slowly, letting you catch your breath for a brief moment as your hearing returns and the room comes back into focus, the small spots in your vision clearing up as you float back down.

When you move to properly sit up as to not suffocate him thats when his vice like grip returns, both hands digging into your hips harder than before and forcing you back onto his face with a short laugh that showed he was up to no good.

“Nngh, Kook,” you groan when he reattaches his lips around your clit, strong pulsating sucks flaring up the tight coil in your stomach once more. The after effects of your orgasm being too fresh in your system, the tingles spreading out throughout your body as he continued the torturous rhythm he had going, hurdling you to another release embarrassingly fast.

“Shit, so good.” You mewl and his eyes shut, there was nothing Jungkook would love more than to hear you pant and moan about how good he made you feel for the rest of his life.

He feels your thighs tense above him as your second orgasm rushes over you in a more calming feeling than the first. Your bones feel like jello now, a warmth flowing across your limbs as you moan his name out like a mantra.

Jungkook finally pulls back with a sigh, his lower face covered in a sheen of your cum that his tongue comes out to lick up. “Fucking delicious.” He groans out, releasing your thighs and giving your ass a gentle slap.

You let yourself flop off of him, your knees nearly knocking into his head but all he can do is laugh at the fucked out look on your face as you try to catch your breath again on the bed, your limbs twisted about in a careless manner.

He sits himself up, his cock once again resting against his stomach and making the small puddle of precum near his belly button drip down. His fingers trace up your quivering thighs, enjoying the subtle twitching he had caused with a smirk on his face.

“You still wanna fuck me baby?”

Your eyes flutter open, not even realizing when you had shut them in the first place, but when you focus back in Jungkook is hovering above you with a sweet smile on his face as if he hadn’t let you get a taste of the good life just now.

“After that? Of course I do.”

Your legs fall open as you say that, leaving your messy folds on display for him, covered in his spit and your cum. “You see how messy you are already, is my Butterfly that excited for my cock?”

A whimper leaves your mouth when he gently slaps his cock over your pussy, the head of it nudging against your sensitive clit when he starts to rut against you. His thick length spreads your folds apart, your arousal coating his aching cock every time he thrusts forward.

“Jungkook.” You cry, utterly desperate as your hips roll up into his to match his motions.

“I got you baby,” he grunts out, forcing himself to pull away from you. His eyes start to roam your room, looking at either night stand on the sides of your bed and you grin when you realize what he’s searching for.

“Left side.” You point towards the top drawer and he smiles, reaching out to pull the drawer open and slip out the squared packet he was in search of. He tears it open with his teeth, discarding the foil aside as he slips the condom on, a small groan escaping him as he squeezes his length on the way down.

“Fuck, gonna make you feel so good.” He sighs as he nudges his cock head against your entrance, a teasing motion as he grasps his length in his hand, circling around it.

“Please Jungkook.” You plead, your thighs spreading further apart as he shushes you gently, easing his cock into you inch by inch. The girth of him is spearing you open, your pussy spreading apart as he drives his cock forward until he bottoms out in one go, the both of you gasping out when he sinks in to the hilt.

His hips are flush against you, his palms placed on your inner thighs to keep you spread open for him, his eyes shut softly when your sensitive walls flutter around his length. Jungkook had found his new favorite view point, looking down at you, seeing his thick cock splitting you open as you lay beneath him with your fingers clutching your sheets, your mouth dropped open in a silent moan as you pleaded for him to start fucking you.

He smirks above you, replacing his hands to rest by your sides on the mattress as he rolls his hips back, beginning a rough pace as he pounds into you, every thrust of his hips making a cry bubble out of you as his cock curved just right inside of your pussy.

“God,” you gasped out, throwing your head back as he hit your g-spot just right, your cunt spasming around him every time he thrust back in, “so good.”

He moans in response as he leans forward his mouth enveloping one of your nipples as he does so, swirling his tongue around your bud as he fucks you like his life depended on it. Your hands tangle in his hair once more, freely yanking and tugging on it just the way he liked it, the slight sting in his scalp surging his hips forward with more force.

Jungkook releases your nipple with a slight pop, your pebbled bud covered in a coat of his spit as he looks up at you, seeing your face screwed up in pleasure. He can feel the way your walls pulsate around his cock, your thighs quivering as your third orgasm approaches.

“Fuck baby,” he groans out, his head leveling out with yours as he rocks into you, your hands wrapping around his torso to help you ground yourself as your body gets jostled up with every thrust of his hips.

“You close?” He whispers into your ear, one of his hands coming up towards his mouth, his tongue licking a broad stripe onto his palm before he snakes it down your torso, connecting his fingers with your sensitive clit.

A choked gasp leaves your mouth when he starts to rub tight circles on it, your cunt tightening even more around his length as he does so.

“Shit, y-yes–“ you practically sob, your nails digging into his back, hearing him hiss at the slight pain. “Jungkook,” you plead out, your eyes locking onto his, your brows furrowed together as your mouth dropped open.

“What do you want love?” He wonders, pressing a gentle kiss onto your lips before pulling back, not stopping the intoxicating roll of his hips. A small shudder flows through him as he feels his own orgasm make its presence known, the way your walls are sucking him in making it harder for him to focus on anything else.

“Can you–“ you get cut off with a moan, your thighs lifting up to hook your legs around his waist, desperately trying to tug him closer to you, “spit in my mouth, please.”

Jungkook groans at your request, his thrusts stuttering slightly as he nods vigorously, “Fuck, anything you want Butterfly.”

You think you could actually cry with the way his cock fucks into you, your toes curling in pleasure, more so when you drop your mouth open further for him. His eyes are hazy with lust as he stares down at you, mouth open and waiting for him to fill up and he swears he can cum just from this visual.

Jungkook’s lips pucker up as he collects spit from the back of his throat, letting it pool behind his lips before he opens up and lets the drool pass onto your mouth, the glob of his spit sitting on your tongue for a moment before you pull your tongue back into your mouth and swallow. Your eyes roll back into your mouth with a moan before sticking it back out for more, “So hot,” he groans out as he repeats his actions again, his fingers not letting up as they stroke your clit.

Your breath hitches in your throat as he starts to fuck deeper into you, his cock brushing against the sensitive spot inside of you that has you keening, “Fuck r-right there, nngh please Kook.” You whine out and hes not going to deny you, maintaining the angle that has you delirious on your bed, your body quivering underneath his as your orgasm finally crashes down over you, setting your body ablaze as he fucks you through it.

His fingers pull away from your overly sensitive clit, hearing the small gasps and whimpers leaving your lips as the pleasure lights you up. Your eyes fall shut once more, bright spots flashing behind your lids as your pussy spasms around him, a small gasp of your name leaving his lips as you milk the orgasm out of him.

Jungkook’s hips lose their rhythm, his mind heady with pleasure as he starts fucking into you desperately. His hips smack into the back of your thighs, forcing himself deeper into you as he cums hard, emptying himself into the condom inside of you with a deep groan of your name, soft pants following suit as the pleasure fizzles out within him, lulling him into a calm sense of clarity as he looks down at you.

You’re yanked back to the present when he starts to plant kisses on your face, gently bringing you back as he shallowly thrusts into you until fully satisfied.

“You okay?” He questions softly, pressing a kiss to your nose before moving onto your cheeks and then your mouth.

“Mm, yeah.” You mewl, letting your legs unhook from his waist as he pulls out of you slowly, the feeling of being empty making a pout form on your lips. Jungkook snickers when he sees it, pressing a hard kiss against it as he laughs and sits himself up.

As he’s sat on his haunches his eyes are glued to your swollen cunt, covered in your orgasm and the lube of the condom, your quivering thighs coming together to cover the view from him with a short giggle.

“Oh are you shy now? All of a sudden.” He teases, his hand playfully swatting at your thighs before he stands up and slides his condom off, tying off the end and tossing it into the small bin by your night stand.

“No,” you laugh as you prop yourself up, “but with that face you were making I had to hide the goods before you got any other ideas.”

He joins you in your laughter, his hands reaching forward to yank you towards him, your face pressed against his chest as he stood at the edge of your bed. His arms are wrapped around you, the rumble of his laughter being felt from your proximity.

“Hey,” you start out softly, pulling your face away from him, a sly smile spreading out that he eyes inquisitively, “can we go eat that chicken now?”

He scowls at you immediately, his facade being cracked as his lips curl up into a smile, a devious glint in his eyes that you spot instantly. A squeal leaves your lips when you feel his fingers dig into your back, swatting him away from you as you get off the bed with a laugh.

Jungkook stomps behind you as you exit the bedroom on your shaky legs, entering the living room and bending forward to scoop up your previously discarded shirt from the floor and putting it back on to cover the goods you knew Jungkook would be after.

You hear his footsteps behind you as you approach the kitchen, your hands busying themselves as you untie the plastic bag holding the food you two had ordered, pretending to not give him any attention as he walked your way, still fully naked in all of his glory.

He shakes his head slightly when you pull out a piece of chicken and take a bite, your eyes squinting up at him as you smile around it, “You’re never gonna play fair huh?” He questions as he stands beside you, plucking out the chicken from your hand and taking a bite of his own.

“Fair shmair–“ you yelp out when his palm reaches out and smacks your bare ass, the slap sounding out in your otherwise quiet apartment.

“Remind me to make sure we get our own room in Busan.” He smirks as he continues munching on the chicken, fighting the urge to laugh at the face you give him, acting as if you weren’t already having the same thoughts he was.

“Yeah, what do you think we’re gonna have a fuck fest?” You joke, as you sort through the alcohol bag he also brought, pulling out a can of beer and cracking it open.

He extends the half eaten chicken towards your lips, offering you another bite which you take. “Oh I know we’re gonna have a fuck fest. Are you joking, good luck trying to escape my glorious dick after tonight.”

You nearly choke on your drink as you laugh, your own hand reaching out to deliver a swift smack onto his own bare ass, his skin smarting as he yelps with a chuckle, his palm soothing the burn on his cheek.

“Pervert,” you cackle, grabbing another piece of chicken as you saunter away from him, “but text Namjoon now please.”

His jaw drops when you wiggle your hips at him, another laugh leaving your lips when you see him take off after you, the both of you bounding back into your room for a round two. Busan was definitely going to be a fuck fest if Jungkook had anything to do with it.

#goldenclosetnet #btsghostie #btswritingcafe #yoonkooknetwork #jungkook smut #bts smut #jungkook angst #jungkook #jeon jungkook #new

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writertitan · 4 years ago

Text

The Swan

pairing: levi x reader

word count: 2398

themes: musician!reader, v soft levi, just fluff, Levi’s POV

requested by anon

The day Historia was crowned was important to Levi for two reasons. One was that, of course, he felt a surge of pride at one of his cadets rising to her full potential and becoming queen. He had always been slightly concerned about Historia; she was small - even smaller than him - and admittedly, he’d always viewed her as the weakest of them.

The second reason that day was so important to him was a reason he wasn’t quite ready to come to terms with.

That day was the day he’d noticed you. Noticed you fully.

You had always kept to yourself and Levi hadn’t chosen you to be on his squad. He barely had time to keep track of his own squad, let alone remember all the other scouts. Not that there were many scouts left. Still, you’d joined right before this entire mess had happened. Most of those who had been around before knowledge of titans being humans were dwindling off now. Except for you.

But you being a survivor wasn’t what had caught Levi’s attention. In fact, you hadn’t even been the one to catch his attention. Not literally, not physically.

After the coronation, Levi had stepped away, just for a breather and to take a break from socializing. It was exhausting, being around so many people, and being around so much celebration.

He walked down this hall and that one, turning corners and essentially losing himself in a maze. There wasn’t a soul in sight.

And that’s when he heard it. Very soft and faint at first, and growing stronger as he made his way down the empty hallway. Someone was playing notes on a piano, and beautifully so. Levi couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard music like this, where it wasn’t being played by some drunk outside at the markets, or being played in jest on base by slapping pots and pans and bringing out a worn out guitar.

Soldiers didn’t get to hear refined music like this. So, Levi stopped. He stopped walking once he was right outside the door to the room where the music was. He stopped and he listened. It was so...rejuvenating. The exhaustion and stress he felt seeped away just the slightest bit, but it was enough.

Out of curiosity, he leaned in just the slightest bit to peek his head into the room and figure out who was playing the piano like that. To his complete and utter surprise, he knew who you were immediately, even though you looked...different.

There was the you that he had seen in passing at base. The you who saluted him and carried an air of respectfulness. The you who gave respect and followed orders and did what a soldier did.

And then there was this you. The you Levi would have never thought you to be. The you that demanded respect instead of gave it, just from the way you poised yourself over the black and white keys and moved purposefully, eyes closed and face peaceful but concentrated. He barely recognized you and yet he knew exactly who you were.

He shrunk back into the shadows and leaned against the stone wall, his head resting against it as he let himself, for once, relax.

Each time you stopped playing, letting the last notes die out and fade away, Levi felt his heart sink in an unfamiliar way, only to swell in his chest when a new song began playing from your fingertips. He stayed like that all night, slumped against a wall and out of view while you played song after song as the night wore on.

Even though he understood that eventually you had to stop and everyone had to leave, it still pained him when you stopped for good, the dying song accompanied by the scraping of the bench you sat on moving on the wood floors as you shifted to stand up. Levi sighed to himself and let reality creep back into his mind. The stress that had melted away was slowly weighing back on his shoulders, and made him feel heavy again.

He was gone before you left the room.

After that, Levi couldn’t stop watching you. It was like you made music with everything you did. He noticed how you’d hum a tune to your horse. He noticed how you even managed to form some sort of gentle melody just tapping your fingers against a table.

You were constantly making music. He heard music whenever he was around you now. It was starting to get ridiculous, because it wasn’t like anything had changed, really. You still greeted him the same way, treated him the same way, acted and performed the same way. You had absolutely no idea that Levi had changed towards you.

He was good at keeping his distance, at masking all of his inner thoughts and feelings. That’s what he was good at. And he was good at convincing himself that his choices were sound. Maybe he’d just been a little drunk that night and your music had moved him because of that. There was nothing different about you. You were just another soldier. He didn’t know you.

But why did it feel like he knew you? Why was he catching himself being more observant? The tune you hummed to your horse never changed. When you’d been put on stable duty, that was when another tune escaped you. He’d only caught it while passing by the stables, but he immediately noticed it was different.

He also noticed how you stopped and listened to the musicians at the markets when you’d all ridden into town for some supplies. He saw the way you eyed the man with the fiddle, your eyes watching the way his hands produced music from it in an almost careless fashion. The music Levi once thought was atrocious was of course still not as good as the music you had brought into his life, these drunken fools were still atrocious in some sense, but now he listened to it differently. It wasn’t that bad. Not when it had you smiling.

It drove Levi crazy that you still looked at him the same way when he was bursting at the seams with wanting to tell you his big secret. You looked at him the same, you talked to him the same. All surface level. Levi often caught himself staring at you. And, when he had a few minutes of spare time, he filled those few precious minutes with thoughts of you and what it would be like for you to look at him so serenely, the way you did when you made all that music.

He hoped he wasn’t being too obvious. He had honestly convinced himself that he was the same as always and nobody knew his little secret. It didn’t matter that he was gentler with you, went out of his way sometimes just to say hello to you, made sure you were eating enough and sleeping enough. You didn’t notice, which calmed him down and also made him a little crazy. Although it was better, easier this way, he still hated that he couldn’t tell you what was happening to him. How could he tell you that he was constantly thinking about you, even when he wasn’t supposed to? How could he tell you that those songs you hummed were stuck in his mind? How could he tell you that he loved music now because of you?

There was an irrational part of his brain that screamed at him to tell you, but it was not as strong as his rational parts that told him to never even take the opportunity should it arise.

Levi was sure his rational brain was winning. Until the day he sat down next to you in the mess hall and handed you his bread when he saw you giving half of yours to Sasha.

“Don’t starve yourself,” was all he said, and fought the twitch in his lips when you replied with, “I could say the same to you, Captain.”

He ate quietly beside you, heart thumping wildly in his chest the entire time. He’d never said so many words to you all in one breath.

It had taken so much work and, truth be told, he almost didn’t give it to you. Levi felt the rational part of him slowly succumbing to...hope? And he understood why so many people clung to this feeling.

He hoped that if he gave you this gift, you would see. You would be able to understand what he was feeling and thinking and fighting himself about. And maybe, just maybe, you would be flattered. Maybe you would be willing to reciprocate.

But Levi found himself not caring about what the endgame would be as he walked to your room, gift clutched tightly and clumsily in one hand as he knocked on your door. After a moment of waiting, he deflated, wondering where you could be right now. It was evening, after supper, and there was some down time to be had tonight. Could you have gone out, were you with someone els-

Then suddenly, you were there, surprise etched on your face at the sight in front of you. Levi hid his gift behind his back just in time, and he couldn’t remember the last time he’d ever been this nervous. Had he ever been this nervous?

“Captain,” you greeted him, voice trailing off so it sounded more like a question. And then a real question. “Can I help you with something?”

A real conversation. Levi hadn’t really prepared himself for this. Whatever he’d planned on saying was suddenly forgotten and he cursed his now completely irrational brain.

“I got you something,” he managed to say, shifting uncomfortably and no longer able to meet your eyes. He pulled out his gift from behind his back to show you, eyes snapping to your face at the gasp that came from your mouth.

The look in your eyes was enough to make the whole endeavor worth it. But the way you were so gentle with taking it from his hands and examining it closely, it made any regret, any hesitance, leave his body.

You scrunched up your nose and looked at him, violin close to your chest as you almost cradled it.

“Captain, this looks expensive...I can’t accept it. Where did you get it?”

“Don’t worry about it,” he assured you almost instantly, panicked at the thought of you not keeping his gift to you. “Really, nobody wanted the damn thing. I thought you’d like it.”

“How did you know I could play the violin?” you asked him, genuinely curious.

Levi gulped. He hadn’t known for sure, had only guessed based on one encounter, and hoped that you’d at least just like the gift. So, he told the truth as best as he could without incriminating himself.

“I saw you eyeing one of those musicians at the market once, the one that always plays that goddamn fiddle,” Levi explained, voice as stiff as his body. “Figured maybe you knew a thing or two…”

You broke out into a smile then, though it was bashful, and Levi looked away again before his face got too hot and he flushed in a way that gave him away. If you noticed anything amiss, you said nothing.

“Thank you...this is the best gift,” you said earnestly, then paused, voice growing soft as you asked, “Would you like to hear a little something? I haven’t played in years so I can’t promise it’ll be any good. But maybe you could critique me.”

“I’d love to.” The words came out of his mouth before you could even finish what you were saying.

You let him in your room and closed the door behind him, and suddenly, the atmosphere was much more intimate. Levi tugged at his collar, wondering why it was so hot all of a sudden, but kept a polite distance as he settled into a chair by the corner and you surprisingly got comfortable in the middle of your room. Levi didn’t know much about music, but figured it would have been more comfortable to sit down or something.

When you started playing, it was a song he’d never heard before. Hadn’t heard you play it on the piano before, hadn’t heard you hum it or drum it with your fingers before. It was new. And it was beautiful.

This was the song that told him he was in love. How silly was that?

But he listened, enraptured by the way you put your heart into every note. He took note of how your eyes closed in that way that was somehow familiar to him now and how your brows furrowed slightly in concentration. But you still managed to look so serene.

He never took your eyes off you. Levi watched you play out the entire song, feeling his heart move with the strings. You played his heart like you played the violin, in the most purposeful and melodic way. It was pure music.

Even when you stopped playing and got a little shy, the confidence in the musician version of yourself slipping away, Levi didn’t look away. He was in awe and didn’t care if it showed on his face.

“You’re not rusty,” he promised you. “You’re incredible.” He meant it in more than one way.

He wouldn’t have been able to know the way your heart swelled at the sweet words of praise.

“Thank you,” you whispered.

He stood up slowly, not wanting to invade your privacy any longer, but stopped at your door and turned to look at you, that damned nervousness seeping back into his veins.

“Do you think...do you think I could hear you play more often?” he asked you, the words forcing themselves out before he could catch them. But who was he kidding? He didn’t want to stop himself from asking.

He didn’t fail to notice the way you brightened at his question. He was relieved at the eager nod.

“Anytime,” you replied. Then you held up the violin; you held it so gracefully, and knew exactly how to handle it. Levi warmed at the sight. “And thanks again for this gift...I love it, Captain.”

“Levi. Just Levi,” he corrected you. And you gave him a grin.

“I love it...Levi.”

It was music to his ears.

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi ackerman x you #levi ackerman oneshot #levi one shot #levi fanfiction #levi fluff #levi fic #levi ackerman fic #levi ackerman fanfiction #levi ackerman #levi #aot fanfiction #aot oneshots #aot #snk fanfiction #snk

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bukojuiice · 3 years ago

Text

farewell, my dark knight. — diluc ragnvindr

ೃ ft. diluc x gender neutral! reader

ೃ 6k words

ೃ tags and warnings: angst. a sweet and lovestruck diluc. reminiscing memories with him. he writes you letters and talks to you about his day. he’s very soft and he’s very much in love with you.

ೃ requested by anon: “hi! could i request a diluc x reader, in which diluc dies from a mission, and as reader is cleaning out his room, they find letters neatly packed into drawers, and with closer inspection, they are letters diluc wrote to reader every day, so when he isn’t around anymore, reader can read them and not forget about him? sorry i’m a sucker for angst and your writing omg” (thank you for this request! and for making me cry while writing it! <3 i put a lot of work into this, so i hope everyone enjoys!)

ೃ genshin impact masterlist

ೃ if you want to be a part of my taglist, answer this form! ♡ (please like and most esp. reblog if you enjoyed! it means a lot!)

They say all your senses and your feelings are heightened when you are broken and mourning.

You hear things more clearly like the tenderness of his voice because it’s better than listening to the drum of your heart.

You feel the sun, the air, and his gentle touch on your skin because you are trying to feel things instead of shutting down.

You smell his perfume and the scent of the pancakes he used to make- everywhere.

You still feel his fingers as though they are knotted through yours and it makes you cry.

It hurts.

It pains you.

This is the most tragic day of your life.

“Sir Diluc has.. passed away.” Jean announces, reaching for your hands and squeezing them in support. She pulls you inside a spare and lonely room in the Ragnvindr manor. Lisa is at her side, for extra emotional support, handing you a spare handkerchief as they break the news to you.

Your heart sank.

You were not the first to know. But, even if you were… there was no possible way.

You were a traveling adventurer in search of something that will quell your curiosities; disappearing for days or weeks on end. There were times when Diluc would come with you on your travels and the two of you would just go wherever your heart desires. Staying in Qingce Village and mingling with the elderly townsfolk, Visiting the Adeptus abode, strolling around Springvale or vacationing in the summer islands… there was nothing that could stop the two of you together.

As two of the heroes of Mondstadt from the Stormterror incident and his status as the esteemed owner of the Dawn Winery, you were famed and loved by all. Though as Diluc was not one for friendliness or casual interactions with others, It was all because of you that he had befriended some particular members of the Adventurer’s guild and the Knights of Favonius. You had even asked them if they could visit the Dark Knight hero at the winery from time to time.

Well, aside from the regular visits of Venti and Kaeya to satisfy their quench for wine, Jean accompanied by Amber and Lisa to ask for advice, uncommon visitors such as Klee and Albedo had even come by to accompany him now and show him their wonderful new experiments and discoveries….

You had given him a reason to have hope in the people of Mondstadt once again. His previous faction with the Favonius knights may have been imperfect, but Jean had proved to be amazing enough to rectify all these past mistakes that had eased Diluc’s resentment to the knights.

You continue to count back to all the things that he has done for you. As someone who’s had no home and who’s been traveling all their life, Diluc became your home. He had fallen for you and your wondrous soul. He was your living reminder that you can find home in a person. Someone who you can rely on, someone you will come back to after a long tiring day, someone who will love you for who you are and who will kiss your flaws away.

And now, he’s gone. Just like that.

You have been gone for three months prior to all of this as you were on a secret commission to fight off a huge group of treasure hoarders in Natlan. Although you were able to travel back to Fontaine shortly after, you had to wait for further instruction from the guild before you could come back to Mondstadt. At the time, the only thoughts to occupy your mind was Diluc who had been waiting for your return and your longing and desire to run into his arms and for him to kiss your tiredness away.

However, it took two agonizing days before Jean’s letter had arrived. All you could do was weep and worry endlessly at the inside of a quaint inn at the heart of the bustling and picturesque region that was Fontaine. Inside her letter were updated reports of Diluc’s disappearance; he had been missing for three days without telling the maids or any of the inhabitants of the mansion and the winery of his departure. He left without a trace…

As soon as the sun had risen that same day, you quickly left the region and made your way back to Mondstadt. With no knowledge or premonition that at the same day…

Diluc would be found.

On the road to Mondstadt, the staff at the Winery had been going on their merry day to deliver the wine to the city, when they came across a body. Battered and bruised. Upon closer inspection, it was their dearest master; the current head of the Ragvindr family. Further suspicion arose when a hoard of Fatui members had been defeated; lying beside the riverbend not too far from the manor. The Knights of Favonius had quickly deduced that Diluc had crawled all the way back to the outskirts of the Manor but had unfortunately succumbed to his injuries.

From that day on, the sun had never shined again.

Your stomach was in knots. You had a feeling that something had happened and yet, you didn’t expect for it to be something like this. You didn’t expect to hear about the state that he was in when he was found.

He’s strong. He’s the Dark Knight Hero, One of the protectors of Mondstadt; Hell, he’s one of the most powerful vision users of the region.

Yet… how did this happen?

A knock on the door had brought you out of your trance. With a simple “Come in.” said by Jean, the guest in question was revealed to be Kaeya who peered out from the door. A forlorn expression plastered upon his face. His head turns and your eyes meet his, “(Y/N)... how are you doing?” His voice gentle and melancholic.

“N-never been better.” You remark in between sobs. “I-I need time to process this.” Wiping your tears with the handkerchief, you stand up, about to take your leave. “I-I’ll be in my room if you need me.”

“According to the Favonius accords, Sir Diluc must be buried tom-”

“To hell with the Favonius accords!” You snap, still trying to fight back the tears as the three knights stare at you in shock and in empathy. “M-master Jean… p-please. Just one more day. Before I have to say goodbye to him forever… Let me have one day to reminisce about him.”

The Acting Grandmaster hesitates, as if collecting her thoughts first before she speaks. “Very well. We will be arranging the burial and other matters in the near future. For now, please get all the rest and recuperation you need. Thank you for your time, honorary knight. We’ll see you in a few days.” Jean holds your hand and gives it another reassuring squeeze as she and Lisa watch your walking figure make your way out of the room.

Kaeya, who was still in front of the entryway, moves to the side to give you some space to make your leave. “Before the maids fully clean up his room, why don’t you tune in there for the night? I’m sure Diluc would love that.”

“He would.” You smile half-heartedly, the indigo-haired man giving you a reassuring pat on the arm. “T-thanks Kaeya. I will.”

“I’ll be staying in the manor for the rest of Diluc’s memorial if you want t-to… talk about him. See you around.” You nod at him before shuffling down the stairs to enter the manor wing that led to Diluc’s room.

Oh, how you wish you were as calm as Jean and as emotionally mature as Kaeya right now.

How are they able to hold up so well? How are they able to take this all in and not be on the verge of breakdown like you are? They’ve known Diluc since childhood. Hell, Kaeya was his adopted brother. His brother in arms. How are they able to accept his death just like that?

Are you just… not as strong as them?

You take a left turn around the manor wing that leads to Diluc’s room to be surprised by Adelinde who greets you in front of Diluc’s door, a torn and bloodied folded paper in her hands. “Honorary knight, we have a letter addressed to you. The staff at the winery found it tucked inside Master Diluc’s pocket. You might want to read it.” She gingerly hands you the folded piece, patting your hand gently once she places it in your palm.

“Thank you, Adelinde.”

You turn your attention to unlocking the door, fishing for the spare key that he had given you and inserting it into the knob, you hear the head maid speak behind your back.

“Whilst you were away, there was never a day that Master Diluc had not spoken about you with such love and praise. I hope you know in your heart how much he loves and cherishes you. As there was never another person in his life who he had loved the most after Sir Crepus’ passing.” She recounts, her voice is slow and meek. “Thank you for loving Master Diluc and for showing him what it truly means to be a part of a family again. The entire staff sends our deepest condolences and we will be here for you and Sir Kaeya whenever you need us.” From the side of your eye, you see Adelinde bowing deeply before she subsequently takes her leave and disappears into the hallway.

With a heavy sigh, the door clicks and you enter your beloved’s abode.

Not one thing has been touched. It still looks and remains the same.

His coat is still hanged on his wardrobe door, his usual button up black dress shirts folded neatly on one of the drawers, books that he’s read to you time and time again are shelved properly, a hearth in front of the bed that reminded you of your endless cuddles in front of the fireplace, his gloves neatly placed on his bedside table, and pictures of the two of you together in the Golden Apple Archipelago taken with the Kamera are hung on clips and strings on his desk.

It was like he never left.

Like his physical being had just gone off on a long adventure.

Yet, it feels so empty.

Because his soul and his presence is no longer here with you.

And it hurts. Everything hurts.

You take a seat on his bed. The mattress slightly creaks as you reach for an unusual piece of paper sticking out of his bedside drawer. Opening the cabinet slowly, your suspicion and curiosity heightens when what is revealed to be inside was a wooden box. Engraved were Diluc’s initials and letters that spelled out “Do not touch”

Curiosity overwhelming you, you gingerly open the wooden box to be surprised with folded letters written by Diluc that were all addressed to you. Along with the date and time it was made.

He wrote letters every single day. Hoping that once you came home, you could finally read them. Trying your best not to burst into tears, you carefully look through all of them and notice that they were all written during your absence. During those three agonizing months that you were gone.

Although his daily letters were short and simply written, he never fails to write to you an encompassing message at the end of the week. In each weekly letter, he entailed many things: Like writing to you about his day, how much he misses you, how much time has passed, and discussing particular things he found during his nightly patrols or interesting things about his day. He wrote letters to you as if you were right there with him. His words etched with simplicity yet full of love. He wrote these letters to be whisked away from a minute of his otherwise mundane life. And despite how uneventful they may be, he still shares them with you because he knows you will listen. He knows you will take your time to read everything. As even though the two of you may be thousands of miles apart, your hearts will still beat as one.

You finally find the one that he had written for you the day after your departure, and begin to read it’s contents. Preparing yourself for an overflow of emotions that you were not ready for.

JANUARY 3RD, 45 BP

As much as I hate to see you go, I realized that life has plans for all people. Even if those plans separate us from the ones we love. For the recent years that have passed, I have seen staff at the winery and maids in the manor come and go. And yet, I still haven’t gotten used to seeing you go off on your adventures. There are times I wish I could just be free of all of these responsibilities and come along with you on your escapades. But alas, I will presume that life is not for me. Always know that no matter where my life takes me or yours takes you, I will love you whether there are 1000 miles between us or none at all.

I miss you already, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

JANUARY 10TH, 45 BP

A week has come to pass since you left and I’ve been trying my best to keep myself busy. Kaeya has come to visit me and so has Venti, but they have done absolutely nothing to alleviate my boredom. In fact, they’ve all been a pain in the arse. When I tossed them into two of the guest rooms for passing out drunk, I was suddenly reminded of the times that you would wait for me at the Angel’s Share and help me drag Rosaria back to the cathedral, Kaeya back to his residence, and Venti back to the tree in Windrise. Then, we would take a night stroll around the city as the dwindling lights of the shops and houses being the only things illuminating our way. I cannot wait to do all of this with you again. It feels like the universe closes in around us whenever we’re together. But… the moment is so fleeting and you are gone again. The universe is awfully large and I am awfully small, unable to hold the world with my hands. I just wish you were here to make me feel as if the universe is close enough to reach once more.

Good night, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

JANUARY 17TH, 45 BP

It is 9 o’ clock in the evening as I write this. Today, Bennett had visited and asked if I could train him to control his vision. I said yes as I had nothing much better to do. Fischl and Razor were there to accompany him as well. To be quite honest, they’re quite a convivial trio. It’s nice to see them remain free-spirited despite everything that has happened recently. I could not bear to remain as cheerful as they are amidst the constant abyss order and Fatui attacks. After our training, Razor had come up to me and told me that you and I are lupical. I didn’t quite understand at first, but with Fischl’s long and heavy explanation, I had come to understand what it meant: Family.

Perhaps… we can be a family? Have a family of our own?

Oh… wait. I know, it’s too soon. So, please disregard my wishful thinking for now. I’d like to apologize if that may have come out the wrong way.

Thank you for reading today’s letter, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

JANUARY 24TH, 45 BP

I finished a book I borrowed from the Favonius library today. Lisa said you've been eyeing the tome for a long time. However, since Ella Musk was borrowing it at the time and you had to leave shortly for your trip to Natlan, you never got the chance to. I'd like to apologize for having been able to read it in advance. Perhaps, I can read it to you once you get home? Maybe in front of the fireplace, blankets hugging us for warmth, and cups of hot chocolate in our hands? Anyhow, there was something I found interesting about it.

There are Sumeru philosophers who claim that the past, present, and future all exist at the same time. That there are parallel universes. It had me thinking, in another universe... Would we still be together? Will fate bring us together? Could there be more for us outside of this blue sky we share?

I'm sorry for making you worry. It's probably my insomnia kicking in. These past twenty days have been quite lonely without you.

Goodnight, my love. May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

JANUARY 31ST, 45 BP

I can’t believe that January has finally come to pass. It feels like forever since you left. I know, I know, I sound like I’m sulking. But… the thoughts I had from finishing the book last week still have not left my mind. If only I could close my eyes and find myself in the place wherever you are right now. Kind of like…. What were those called? Waypoints? Yes! Those. Mayhaps, I should pay Sucrose or Albedo a visit and ask if they could make a portable wayfinder for me or a potion that can teleport me anywhere? Well, at least I have something interesting to do tomorrow.

See you soon, my love. May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

FEBRUARY 7TH, 45 BP

The day you left, I went through all my old journals, frantically looking for the first mention of you. Searching for details I can no longer recall and any morsel of information that may have been lost. It honestly made me laugh at how different I used to think of you back then. You were always a kindred soul and yet, there was an eccentric air around you that I just couldn't quite understand. It was the good kind, of course. I have never thought ill of you since the beginning. Ever since the tragedy that befell my father, I would push everyone away from me. I told myself that if you didn't form close bonds with others, then you wouldn't get attached to them. They would be easier to let go and you could. But... you were the first who went out of your way for me. The first time you entered Angel's Share and challenged me to a game of chess solely because someone from the Adventurers' guild told you so? I knew there was something about you. Something wonderful. I wish to show you these old journals soon. Mayhaps you can get a clearer picture of my thoughts and impressions of others once you read them.

For now, all I can do is count the days until you are home once more.

Goodnight my love, may the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

FEBRUARY 14, 45 BP

People should fall in love more. Fall in love with how the dandelions blow with the wind, Fall in love with the safe and comforting feeling of being in the middle of a bustling city that is Mondstadt, Fall in love with the stars and the night that shines before us and Fall in love with the idea of being in love or loving someone. Having recently realized these things, I had the most spontaneous idea of wanting to get married in the Winery with you. In the future, of course. I know it’s not much. But I know you’re not the type to want anything fancy, so it’s the perfect area for the most beautiful moment of our lives to take place.

I had gotten a little too into the idea of planning our wedding and I aimlessly listed down those who will be attending. All our closest friends and family. Can you imagine Little Klee as the flower girl? Kaeya as the best man? Jean and Lisa as the maids of honor? Maybe we can even ask Eula to choreograph our wedding dance for us? Most importantly, have the wonderful honor of having the Lord Barbatos to officiate our marriage?

Once again, I hope you can pardon me and my blissful escapism. I can’t wait for the day to arrive where we can plan all of this and make it a perfect wedding.

As always, thank you for reading my constant rambles and inner thoughts, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

FEBRUARY 21ST, 45 BP

If you were taken away from me, this place called our world, I would cry.

Sighing, wringing my hands, and wondering why.

How can the archons and those up in Celestia dare to take the most precious soul in the universe from me?

But... what if I would be the one who would be taken away from you? Will you feel the same way too?

FEBRUARY 28TH, 45 BP

Please excuse me for everything I said in my message last week. I may have sounded somewhat selfish and I'd like to apologize for making you overthink when you already have so much on your plate. I cannot wait to mail out these letters to you, but the postal office in Monstadt doesn't deliver letters to Natlan, unfortunately. I guess I have to wait until you reach Fontaine. Putting those aside for a moment, something happened today that I wanted to share with you. Whilst I was feeding Noctua, I had realized something. What about the little birds who dream of flight? Those who gaze into the starry night and think that one day... they might be a part of that same sky? To be free, to explore, and to have the feeling of air and light coursing through their wings. Is... this the same feeling you felt before? Is this why you go on adventures?

I'd love to talk to you more about this once you get home. For now, all I can do is write you a letter and bid you goodnight.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

March 7TH, 45 BP

Whenever I write a letter addressed to you, I feel a raw ache in my bones when the ink seeps into the paper— for I feel the bittersweet sorrow of wanting you to be right by my side, to have my fingers intertwined with yours, and to be exhumed by you because you have always seen past all my flaws and imperfections. I miss you. So much. At this point, it feels as if I have no right to. Tell me... is it right to feel this way? Am I being selfish for wanting the days to come by? For April to be in our midst? Can I blame the archons for wanting to have you in my arms again? There’s something happening next week, and to be honest, I’m quite excited for it. See you soon, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

March 14TH, 45 BP

Today is the first day of the Windblume Festival. How I terribly wish you were in Mondstadt right now. This would have been your first year and I know you would love the events. I remember when Father brought Kaeya and I to the festival for the very first time, and oh how my eyes were filled with wonderment and unshaken innocence. He gifted us a harp that day, and I still play it when I have time. It’s a wonderful keepsake with a lovely name, (The Windblume Ode) and it never fails to remind me of my father. I wonder if… Kaeya still kept his? Nostalgia aside, Venti caught up to me on the way home and told me I should see what he has in store for the second week of the festival. I know that the bard has a lot up his sleeve, but this particular encounter with him filled me with curiosity. What could it be? What does he have in store for me?

Before I end this, I bought you a bouquet of Dandelions and Cecilias today. They have a different color than the usual wreaths and posies, as these ones only bloom during Windblume. I placed them inside the vase on your desk just a few minutes ago. I do not necessarily have green thumbs, so please do not blame me if anything bad happens. I made sure that they’re still in season once you get home and I can’t wait for you to see them.

Goodnight my love, May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

MARCH 21ST, 45 BP

Once you get home, please do assist on reprimanding the bard for me. Can you believe he had tricked me into attending his love poem-making classes? Since a lot of the cityfolk have been dying to take writing classes under him and were willing to pay if he did, he had decided to take this opportunity to receive mora and “get rich.” Venti brags to the cityfolk that he will use their compensation for good reasons… but we all know he’ll just spend it wasting away at Angel’s Share. I won't let him pass me when it’s my hour to manage the tavern, of course. But… maybe one drink as a prize for all his hard work wouldn’t be too bad? After all, I did learn a lot of things from him. He was also quite smart for incorporating such an activity with Windblume. As during the festivities, the people of Mondstadt offer Windblumes to Barbatos and to those they love and adore.

I spent all day being mentored and trained into creating “the most romantic poem written in Teyvat” I know Venti is bluffing and was just trying to soften me so I wouldn’t get mad at him, yet he was actually genuinely impressed with my poetic skills. I didn’t want anyone else to read it before you did, but he snatched the paper from my hands as soon as I finished so that he may critique it. I… didn’t expect him to shed a tear.

Here is the poem I wrote for you, my love. I hope you’ll like it.

“I wish one day, I'd be able to lay you down on a bed of roses with

the stars watching over us.

I wish one day we will be able to see the world together, to touch the stars and become planets.

After all, darling, stars, like life, is what you make of it.

I wish you knew how much I've loved you for all these years, so quietly, so loudly.

One day these roses will never compare to the redness in your cheeks, the softness of your heart.

One day you will see kingdoms rise and the sun dance on your eyelids.

And one day the moon will hang from your fingertips, waiting for you to refract your light and hope onto others.

You are an enigmatic being. A beautiful soul. Sometimes I think that you’re not from this universe.

You have enraptured my soul; my whole being. You taught me how to love.

Everything about you is out of this world and I am merely a human amazed by your interstellar presence as if you are written in the stars.”

MARCH 28TH, 45 BP

I think I’ve gotten the hang of writing poems. I’m quite confident in my lyricism and in my writing now. So, here’s an excerpt of another poem I’m writing for you.

“I will love you through all the days and nights we are apart.

I will love you through every day and as the darkness turns to light.

It is four o’ clock in the afternoon and this is the hardest part.

But this is the way I love you, even if most days we are apart.”

That’s all for now. I’m afraid you’ll only see the final draft once you get back. I hope you’re having a wonderful time at Natlan. Take care always, my love.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

APRIL 4TH, 45 BP

I’ve been pondering about something again today. And It’s all because of Kaeya and Jean. They came over and we reminisced all day long about our childhood memories with tea and crumpets to accompany us. It was a nice feeling. To be able to look back on your childhood with such wistfulness. With such warmth. And with that, I realized something soon after: We’re young, but not that young. Some of the folk in Springvale are sixty-five and still feel young. Even Lord Barbatos feels young. Just because we have years ahead of us doesn’t mean our love isn’t going to last a lifetime. But… that’s the thing. We don’t have an entire lifetime to show love and affection towards each other and to others. Which is why we have to make the most of it. Live in the moment. Make the most of every minute that your heart is beating. Love endlessly. Be kind to others. That’s… what you always told me right? Even if we don’t have the rest of our lives to be with each other, I will still love you anyway. Every day, deeply, wholeheartedly, even if we are young and even if we are old. My love for you will be gentle, but fierce and bold.

That is all for now, my love. May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

April 11TH, 45 BP

The words are melting in my mouth like snow, and I feel like I'm running on empty, but there are only 5 days until you come home. I have dreamt every night of the morning we are together again. You will be drinking dandelion wine and I will be talking about how the orchard will finally bloom. Then in the next few months, we can do everything we dreamed about. We can go around the winery, have picnics amongst the stars, walk around Mondstadt and go on adventures once more. Soon, you will be home, and I will watch the leaves and patiently wait for time to pass by until we are together again.

But.. since I cannot wait no more, I plan to travel all the way to Fontaine to see you. I will not be telling any of the maids or the staff where I’ll be going. They would worry if I left again. This is all going to be a surprise and this letter will proof of that. I want to be beside you once more and I cannot bear to wait for five more days. I will be leaving at Dawn tomorrow! I’ll treat this as a little vacation. I rightfully deserve it as a treat for my birthday, hoping I can spend it together with you. Maybe… we can take a quick detour and go on a little adventuring? Just the two of us. I know you’ll be weary from your trip, but we can continue to stay at Fontaine but we can go once you’ve fully recovered.

I cannot wait to feel your warmth and your love in person again. See you soon, my beloved.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine upon us.

That was it. That was the last letter stored in the box.

You stare into nothingness, unable to find the words to say.

Tears began to form in your eyes, your vision blurring and your hands quivering at the thought of him. All these letters he’s written to you all throughout these months and the fact that he was planning to surprise you by meeting with you at Fontaine? It hurts you so much thinking of all the things that could’ve been. Thinking about what could’ve happened if this tragedy did not take place.

“Diluc…”

You call out for his name. Hoping there is an answer.

But… of course there isn’t.

Your hands absentmindedly graze upon the corners of the bed when you suddenly remember the torn letter Adelinde had given you.

You open the letter with slight hesitance, noticing the dark stains that presumably came from Diluc’s torn and dirtied clothes. With a heavy sigh and as you dry your tears, you begin to read the letter.

APRIL 13TH, 45 BP

Ever since you left, I felt as if we were breaking the whole world's heart. But... all this time, it was always the other way around. It was the world that was slowly breaking us.

Even in these last moments, I cannot fathom that I will be disappearing from this world without even seeing you again. It hurts. My body. There are bruises and wounds all over. My hands are trembling in fear and weariness. I can barely move my wrist and I can hardly think of the words I want to say. I feel the end is drawing near. Not for the world, not for you, but for me. Everything is caving in, my senses are slowing, my eyes are falling, and just waiting for the rest of my system to put me into an eternal sleep.

Would... time be so kind as to slow? Can the world stop for a minute and listen to my plea? To my call? A miracle to happen that could magically transport you to me? I w-wish we could have spent more time together. All these letters I’ve written for you these past few months… were they an omen? Was I foolish to think I could have a future with you? Is this the price to pay for having been separated from you for so long? Is it… still possible to attain it? The life I’ve always wanted with you? Maybe in another world, we can.

We will share every innocent dream and talk about our fears. All your hopes and dreams. I will listen to the sound of your voice and the echoes of your soul. I will kiss your forehead, your knuckles, and your lips. I will stand by you in every new day even when people seem so unkind. I will join up all your insecurities, bundle all your flaws, and make them into a constellation so that I may find them and wish them away. I will do everything to make you feel safe. I will do everything to make you feel loved. There was never a day that I doubted you. You are everything to me, (Y/N). You are a free and wandering soul. I wish I could be behind you to support you wherever you may go, but alas, that fate is not for me. And… I think that’s fine.

Remain as you are. Continue to love others like you have loved me. Teach them what it means to live. Like you have taught me.

Please… don’t be sad. This is the momentary sadness to a new beginning, my beloved.

I love you to the stars and back.

I hope that in another world, our paths may cross again.

May the stars of Teyvat always shine on you.

A heavy yet comforting feeling fills your heart as tears continue to stream down your cheeks. Folding the letter and putting it into the box amongst all the others, You clutch your hand to your chest, looking up at the ceiling.

“Diluc, my love… if you are out there. I will love you forever. Through all these months of my absence, you have never left my mind and I wish I could have been there for you. I wish I could have given you the same amount of love that you have given me. There are so many things I wish I could have done with you. Every letter and every word you’ve ever dedicated to me will forever remain in my heart. These handwritten sentiments will be one of my reminders that you are still with me, no matter where I go. Even if it hurts so much, I will continue to live for you. Honor your memory. I will show the world that I have only loved one man in this lifetime. Thank you for everything.

You have now become one of the stars that shine down upon me. Soon, we will once again meet in the same sky and there, we will have our happily ever after.

Farewell, my dark knight.”

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nelson-et-murdock · 4 years ago

Text

Home - Luke Alvez

*not my gif*

One-shot detailing the reader’s time with Luke and the BAU as they return from a 6-month sabbatical

Warnings: angst mixed with fluff, BAU! Reader, fem reader.

Didn’t proofread so possible occasional errors

Other Details: Reader has PhDs in Psychology and Anthropology with masters in Sociology and Criminal Justice

Pairing: Luke Alvez x fem BAU! Reader. Platonic team x reader. Maybe some mistakes here and there

Flashbacks/memories are in italics and bolded

Word Count: 4.6K

As you drove to Quantico, a familiar feeling started to consume you. It had been over 6 months since you last saw the inside of the BAU. As much as you missed the people you had grown to know, you were unsure of how smoothly your return would go. It wasn’t long before you pulled into the parking lot and made your way into the building and to the elevator. You weren’t officially reinstated to the unit yet due to delays in paperwork and had therefore only been in contact with Emily about your return. The feeling in your stomach as you approached the 6th floor was very reminiscent of your first day with the unit.

Despite having been part of the FBI for years, you still got first-day jitters when you approached the building. You had met with Emily Prentiss a few times prior when your name had been put in for the open position, but you had no idea who anyone else was or how they’d react to a new agent joining the team. You knew full well that the BAU was the crown jewel of the FBI and that there was going to be a lot of pressure to live up to any expectations.

As you made your way to the BAU, you fidgeted with the messenger bag you kept your things in, being in the FBI you found it much more useful than carrying around a purse. After calming your nerves you slowly made your way to Emily’s office, with the help of who would later learn was Spencer.

As you walked towards Emily’s office, Luke spotted you far before you spotted him. Quiet murmurs around the bullpen speculating who you were and what you needed to see Prentiss about were just out of earshot. The conversation with Prentiss was short before the two of you walked out of her office and into the conference room for Prentiss to introduce you to the team.

“As I’m sure you’re all aware we have a new agent joining us. This is Dr. y/n y/ln and I believe she’ll be an excellent addition to the team,” she stated. Quick individual introductions were done and the entire atmosphere was generally accepting yet professional. That was until you got to Luke and had to act like it was the first time you had met, well aware that no one on the team knew about your time spent with him.

“Luke Alvez, I look forward to working with you,” he said coldly, in a way that the team would chalk up to him having a bad day but that you knew was residual anger he had for you.

“Likewise,” you responded with a small smile despite the slight pang in your chest at the sight of the man you once knew.

Not long after you joined the BAU, Penelope had become suspicious of the way you acted around Luke. You had warmed up to everyone in the unit, except for him. One day she had wanted answers and the most she would get from either of you was “We just don’t get along Garcia it’s nothing important.” Even without being a profiler, Garcia could tell there was more to the story than that.

When she got a few spare minutes during a case she did a deep dive into your personal history, looking for anything in your past connecting to Luke.

Garcia didn’t know what to expect when she went digging into you, but it definitely wasn’t that you previously had an over 2-year long relationship with Luke. Garcia had gotten so caught up in finding out what went down between you and Luke that she didn’t hear footsteps approaching in time to close her search.

“Hey Garcia..” you started but tapered off as you saw the screens before you. “I - Prentiss needed - shit sorry I uh,” you tried to get Garcia back on topic for the case but fumbled on the words.

“No no don’t be sorry. I’m so sorry I did this. I know I shouldn’t have looked into your past with Newbie but I couldn’t understand why you guys don’t get along. I mean I get not liking him because he’s Newbie but you. You’re this little ray of sunshine girl wonder. I can’t believe he broke your heart like that-” she started to ramble on but you cut her off before she could continue.

“I left him,” you said hoping it would satiate her curiosity.

“Details? You can’t just drop that on me and not give me details. Did he do something? Was he a bad boyfriend? Should I hate him for it?”

“No, he did nothing wrong, it was all on me. I was scared he started talking about marriage and kids and he had the right to we had been together for nearly 3 years and I wasn’t sure if I was ready so I requested a transfer to a California field office and when it was approved I told him I got a job offer I couldn’t pass up and I left him.”

“Do you still love him?”

“I think part of me always will but Garcia this stays between us. I mean it, don’t tell anyone.”

“My lips are sealed. If you need anything the batcave is always open to have you,” she said as she stood up to embrace you in a hug.

Little did you know, Luke was having a very similar conversation with Matt down the hall.

The ding of the elevator signaling your arrival on the 6th floor shook you out of your thoughts. The closer you got to where you needed to be, the more anxious your return was making you. While you had come across a few bad cases, a few stuck out to you in particular, including the first one you had with the unit, which ultimately allowed you to reconnect with Luke.

The first difficult case for the team since you joined took more of a toll on you than you would like to admit. Once everyone was on the jet you took a seat and hoped to avoid any conversation about how you were feeling that day. You flashed a few small smiles at your colleagues in an attempt to let them know you were okay without actually saying anything. For the most part, your plan had been successful. That was until Luke had noticed the way you had been acting.

“Is it okay if I join you?” he asked motioning to the empty seat beside you. You silently nodded and avoided looking at him as he took a seat beside you. “I know we aren’t exactly close anymore but you can still come to me if you need anything,” he told you as you silently nodded.

“I know - I just. Can we talk about it later? I’d rather not talk about it right now,” you responded, finally looking his way.

“Of course. If you feel comfortable coming over tonight we can talk at my place. I know Roxy misses you,” he said with a smile.

“I’d like that. Thank you.” The rest of the time on the jet was spent in comfortable silence.

Upon getting back to the bullpen, you and Luke decided it would be best for him to drive you to his place after the two of you were done with the reports you had to write. As you sat at your desk and took out the files of papers you needed to complete, you couldn’t bring yourself to concentrate. As your mind kept replaying the events of the previous week, it was apparent you were becoming frustrated. It didn’t take Luke long to see that you were struggling and to tell Prentiss he was going to take you home for the night to make sure you were doing okay before heading over to your desk.

“You’ve done enough work today, let’s get out of here,” Luke whispered to you as you nodded. “I’ll meet you at the elevator in 5 minutes so no one thinks anything about us leaving at the same time,” he told you, knowing you wouldn’t like the idea of any possible attention on you that could come with the two of you leaving together.

The ride to Luke’s was much quicker than you had remembered it to be. Neither one of you two said very much and just let the radio play at a low volume. For most of the ride, you watched out the window while Luke focused on driving, occasionally looking your way to check that you were okay. As he pulled into his driveway, you realized how much you missed Luke and the sense of safety and comfort he provided for you.

The two of you talked about why the case had bothered you so much more than you had expected, and it soon turned to talking about whatever came to your mind. “I miss you. I know we work together now and that I’m the one who left but I really miss you, Luke. I miss spending time with you and the random updates we gave each other when you were gone and overall I just miss you. I think that’s why I struggled so much with this case when I didn’t hear back from you when you were in the field because I couldn’t live with myself if something happened and you didn’t know how I felt,” you started to ramble on.

“I’ve missed you too y/n,” Luke responded as he draped his arm around your shoulders pulling you closer to him, “I miss waking up and knowing you were either right next to me or that you were a phone call away.” Checking the time, Luke placed a kiss on your temple before whispering “Let’s get some sleep it’s getting late”

You nodded in response before the two of you got ready for bed. After changing into a pair of Luke’s sweatpants and an old shirt, you crawled into the bed the two of you had shared so many times before and eventually fell asleep in the arms you had previously grown to associate with comfort and safety.

As you walked down the hall, you passed the spot you were standing when you got an offer to lead a study and return to anthropology. It was a temporary out from profiling but it was something that you had missed doing. Upon getting the offer, a range of emotions flowed through you, yet it took nearly 2 weeks to tell Luke and another 2 weeks to tell anyone else.

The day started like any other day-off with Luke. The two of you slept until around noon and laid around just enjoying each other’s company. Working together didn’t allow for much personal time together as you had to remain professional when on cases. Prentiss didn’t mind when it was a paperwork day that you guys spent time at each other’s desks, so long as PDA was kept to a minimum, which it always was. However, it wasn’t the same as getting to just spend time together without having to worry about catching an unsub or fill out a report in time with no errors.

While laying in bed, the offer to lead an anthropological study at the University of Michigan kept eating at you. You had limited time to make a decision and respond to the offer. However, you couldn’t bring yourself to bring the topic up with Luke and you couldn’t make a decision without informing him of the offer first.

“Is everything okay princesa?” Luke asked, noticing the sudden change in your emotions.

“Yeah, there’s just something I need to talk to you about,” you responded looking up at him. “But I need you to hear me out and keep in mind that I haven’t made a decision yet and that nothing is final.”

“You’re beginning to worry me,” he started, “Are you sure nothing is wrong?”

“I was offered the chance to lead an anthropological study,” you stated, leaving him speechless. Memories of when you left him flooding back. You could tell by the look on his face that he was worried this was the beginning of the end for the two of you once again. “I know what you’re thinking and it isn’t like that this time. I know I did something similar when I left but I promise I’m different now. The study is through the University of Michigan and it’s only slated to take 6-months if not less. It’s primarily overseeing graduate students as they conduct a study. I’d be able to set my own office hours so that we can talk as often as possible. I just don’t know if I want to take the offer.”

“You sound invested in the study already. What would be keeping you from taking it?” he asked, his voice full of support for you. All he ever wanted was for you to achieve your dreams. When you didn’t immediately answer he spoke again, “Is it me? Is that why you might not take it?”

You slowly nodded in response, “I feel like I just got you back and now I might be leaving, and what if things don’t work out with us not in the same state?”

“Princesa, listen to me. If you promise that this is nothing like last time and that you aren’t doing this in an attempt to leave then I trust you. We can figure out us as the situation comes up and I’m confident we can work out this time around. Whatever you decide I am forever proud of you and in awe of all that you’ve accomplished.”

“I love you,” was all you could think to respond with.

“I love you too princesa,” Luke said, placing a gentle kiss on your forehead.

Two weeks had passed since you told Luke of the news when a really difficult case had seemed to take a toll on pretty much everyone. After the case, it was decided that those who were able to would come over to the house you shared with Luke to decompress. Spencer and Garcia came and spent the entire day, and much of the night, with the two of you. Having extended the invite to significant others, Matt brought Kristy by to visit with everyone after they found a sitter around 7:30.

Once everyone who planned on coming was there, it didn’t take long for everyone to get caught up in conversations about personal lives. The conversation started with asking Matt and Kristy about their kids and eventually, everyone started talking about overall changes in their lives. “So girl wonder,” Matt started, referring to you by a name originally bestowed on you by Garcia before it caught on to the rest of the team, “Luke said you got an offer to lead a pretty interesting study is that right?”

“Yeah. He wasn’t supposed to tell anyone I haven’t made a decision yet. The department I’d be overseeing for it ran into some problems and the start date has been pushed back. It would be nice to get away from the dark and scary parts of this job and back to what I started with but I’d miss you guys too much.”

“Would it be permanent?” Spencer asked. The two of you had grown close since you joined the unit and while he wanted to be excited for you, he would be lying if he said the idea of you leaving didn’t upset him at all.

“No,” you started to say, “It’s slated to last 6-months but there’s no guarantee the study will be finished in time.”

“Are you still going to work at the BAU when you come back?” Garcia questioned.

“I’m not sure. If I’m being completely honest, I’ve been struggling with deciding lately if I’m a good fit for the unit, but I plan to stay with the bureau somehow,” you answered hesitantly.

The rest of the night was spent answering questions about the study and getting support from those around you. By the time everyone was ready to leave, you felt completely comfortable knowing that whatever decision you came to, you would have a support system of amazing friends.

Looking back, you should have noticed that the number of times you were having trouble with cases was more of a problem than you should have was a sign you needed to step away from the job. The cases themselves weren’t getting harder, but you personally were having a harder time with them. The longer you were with the unit, the more issues you had been having an increasingly difficult time coping after them. You would have thought they would have gotten easier to manage, but you found yourself struggling every time you felt a decision you made could have changed the outcome of a case. In your previous position before the BAU, you felt powerless as the victims were long gone and often one-off crimes and you felt switching to the BAU and being able to get killers off the street would make you feel better as you’d be helping get active killers off the street. However, you were extremely wrong, and the feeling that you could, no that you should, have stopped their killers before it was too late became too much for you and you decided to take a step back from the unit.

“Y/ln, we need to talk in my office,” Prentiss said as you entered the bullpen.

“Yes ma’am,” you responded, setting your go-bag down on your desk before you made your way to where she was standing. The entire team knew exactly what Prentiss needed to talk to you about and a few members even gave you sympathetic looks as you crossed the bullpen.

“Before we start I just want to say I’m sorry. I know what I did was against protocol,” you started.

“That’s not why you’re in here,” Emily cut you off. “While what you did was unacceptable, you’re here because I’m worried about you. In these past 2 cases, you’ve shown reckless behavior, as if you’re trying to get yourself hurt. I’m not mad at you, but I do need you to let me know if anything is going on that is affecting your ability to do this job.”

You silently nodded as she spoke. The more she said, the more you began to question your place in the unit. “Thank you. I’ve just had some personal problems the past week but I should be good to go now,” you said lying through your teeth.

“Just let me know if anything changes. Your health and personal well-being are more important than this job.”

The next week the BAU was called in to help with another tough case. While it wasn’t the first tough case you encountered in the time you had been with the BAU, this one was worse than others.

The victims are similar in both age and appearance to a close family member of yours and it had made it difficult for you to concentrate in the field the way you needed to. At one point you had even froze and almost didn’t get to a victim in time. For the entirety of the case, you were closed off from everyone when it didn’t involve work.

Upon returning to the BAU, everyone slowly dispersed their desks and you made your way to Prentiss’s office. Her door was open but you still knocked quietly before entering. “Can we talk?”

“Of course, come in.”

You could tell from the sympathetic look on her face that she knew what you needed to say. As you sat across from her she waited for you to speak. After letting out a small sigh you found the confidence to admit what was happening, “I think I need to step away from this job.”

With a silent nod, she grabbed the appropriate paperwork from her file cabinet, “I knew this day was coming. Luke told me you had been having nightmares lately. Fill out these papers and return them to me as soon as possible. If you opt for a sabbatical instead of completely leaving it should take roughly 2 weeks for it to be approved. In the meantime, you would still be a member of the team but be able to use the vacation days you have or you can be solely a desk agent and assist Garcia. Whichever one you choose I, as well as the rest of the team, will be here for you and have enjoyed working with you.”

Fighting tears that had started to form as she spoke, you nodded and said a quiet thank you before leaving her office. Setting the papers down on your desk on the way, you headed towards Garcia’s office to let her know you planned on leaving.

Once you were out of earshot, JJ had peeked at the papers you had set down. “What is it?” Spencer asked, almost not wanting to know the answer.

“Y/ln is leaving the unit,” she responded, voice full of confusion. As she spoke everyone turned to Luke and he nodded slightly in response, confirming you were leaving the family you had grown to love.

After your sabbatical was approved, you accepted the offer to lead the study. Much to your dismay, the team was insistent on throwing you a going-away party, despite knowing you were going to come back in 6 months. You told the team that if they insisted on having a gathering at Rossi’s place that it needed to be something that the members of the unit with kids could bring them with, feeling there was no point in, “saying goodbye to a family member” as Rossi had put it, without all of the family members being there.

“Remind me again why we have to make a big deal of me leaving? I already said goodbye to the team and I’ll be back and with the unit again in less than a year,” you wondered aloud to Luke as you pulled into Rossi’s driveway.

“Because princesa, it’ll make Rossi happy to get to throw you a party and its tradition, regardless of how long the leave will be. And besides, the kids want to see you before you leave for 6 months,” he reminded you.

“You got me there,” you said with a smile before kissing his cheek. “Let’s head in before we’re late.”

Shortly after you guys made your way inside and to the backyard, Matt and Kristy had arrived with their kids. The kids knew why you were having a going away party and instantly ran to you when they saw you. When you noticed the kids running up to you, both you and Luke knelt to prepare for the number of hugs you were about to get. Due to offering to babysit when Matt and Kristy needed time to themselves, the kids had grown to see you as an aunt and Luke as an uncle. The same could be said for Henry and Michael, who showed up with JJ and Will shortly after the Simmons had arrived. The next couple of minutes were spent answering any questions the kids could think to ask you, in the most kid-friendly way you could.

“You’ll be back by my birthday right?” David asked looking up at you. In the time you had known the kids, you hadn’t missed a birthday for any of them.

“Of course I will buddy,” you responded.

“What about our stories?” Chloe asked.

“Yeah who is gonna tell us our stories while you’re gone?” While they had the Simmons Stories, the ones you told were different. You told them stories of the different cultures you studied and the different ways parts of the universe were believed to have come into existence.

“I have them all written down. I can leave them with Luke and he can read them to you,” you reassured all of them.

As the night went on, many memories from your time with the unit were shared with the group. Even though you planned to come back as soon as the study was over, knowing they would spend the next 6 months without you seemed to make everyone nostalgic.

Near the end of the night, everyone started saying their goodbyes. It was particularly hard to say goodbye to Spencer, knowing nearly everyone else he had gotten close to had left him as well. “I’m sorry,” was the first thing you managed to say to him. “I know you hate goodbyes and struggle with change but I promise I will come back and if not to work with the unit at least for our weekly coffee shop visits.”

“You don’t have to apologize. You’re doing what you have to do,” he responded as you opened your arms to offer him a hug. You were always the first to initiate hugs and he usually accepted them.

“I’ll miss you, Spence. You already have my cell phone number and the phone number for my office for the next 6 months. Call me anytime you need me,” you told him while hugging him.

“I’m proud of you. I’ll miss you too y/nn,” he said as you pulled apart.

“See you in 6 months.”

As you made your way into the bullpen you took note of the date. It was 6 months and 4 days since you had seen any of the team face-to-face. While you kept personal contact with the entire team while you were away, you hadn’t told anyone except for Emily that you were planning on coming back to the team. Luke knew when the study would end and was expecting to see you at home later that night, assuming that the team didn’t get a case that pulled him away.

When you entered the bullpen, Matt was the first to notice your arrival. He was already standing at Luke’s desk to ask him a question related to a report he was writing and flashed a small smile in your direction before nudging Luke on the arm, “Why didn’t you tell anyone y/n was returning today?”

Not thinking you were actually there, Luke brushed off Matt. “She isn’t coming home until later tonight and told me even if she does return to the unit it would take some time for her to be reinstated,” he responded, not even looking up from his file.

Knowing he wouldn’t look up from his file right away, you talked quietly with everyone else before approaching his desk. You brought back small trinkets for everyone and placed a small handmade miniature Roxy in front of him. “One of the students I was overseeing made it when she saw a picture of you and Roxy as my phone background to help me cope with being away from you. I figured since I’m home now you could use it more,” you explained as if it wasn’t the first time you were seeing your boyfriend in over 6 months.

Luke watched silently as you spoke, a smile creeping onto his face when he processed you were actually there in front of him. As he stood up from his chair, he quickly wrapped his arms around you before pressing a kiss to your forehead. “You’re home?” he asked, trying to comprehend your arrival.

“I’m home,” you responded with a smile as you looked up at him.

“I’ve missed you so much, you can’t leave me for that long again,” he said with a smile.

Before you could respond, Garcia came speeding out of her office due to having heard of your return from JJ. “Girl wonder! You’re back! Are you staying with us? You can’t leave me with Newbie for that long ever again,” she exclaimed as she approached you.

“Yes, I’m back. Weaning back into the job and will be on desk duty here and helping you for the first 2 weeks but I’m back,” you told her.

333 notes · View notes

andvys · 4 years ago

Text

Longing (part 5)

Warnings: little bit of angst, mentions of a shitty father, mentions of mental abuse, alcohol consumption, fluff

Pairing: Ellie Williams x reader

The following days you and Ellie were a little awkward around each other and your friends definitely picked up on that.

Ellie hurt you and you hurt her but that wasn’t the reason for your weird behavior towards each other. You would forgive each other everything, no matter how much you both would act like you hated one another.

You were currently sitting with Joel on his porch, enjoying a hot cup of coffee he made you. He always invited you to come over to just talk and you loved it, you loved spending time with him in general. Just sitting and talking to him behind the safe walls of Jackson or going out on patrols, killing infected and having each other’s backs, you knew you could always count on him no matter what and you hoped you gave him the same feeling. He truly was like a father to you.

You still haven’t talked about what happened after leaving Ellie’s place the other day, when you ran into him, with tears streaming down your face. After he managed to calm you down he asked what happened and you just told him about how you almost died that day because of the man that attacked you and that you were scared of dying and that’s why you broke down. That was obviously a lie you weren’t afraid to die and Joel knew that but he wasn’t going to pressure you into talking about it when you weren’t ready to talk. He always gave you as much time as you needed and waited for you to speak up about it yourself.

Taking a sip of your coffee you looked at Joel only to find him watching you already. He knew you wanted to talk about something.

“Can I tell you something?” You asked.

“Of course.” He gave you a smile, holding his own cup of coffee.

“My- my father was a horrible person and I’m afraid that I’m the same.” You said, looking down into your cup.

“Why would you think that, sweetheart.” He asked. He knew a few stories about your dad.

“He always made it clear how much he hated me and he always hurt me with his words and I swore to myself that I would never hurt someone like that but I did and now I can’t forgive myself for it.” Joel watched you, feeling bad that the person who was supposed to love you the most hurt you this way.

“People make mistakes (y/n), we say things we don’t mean and accidentally hurt people that we care about. If you were anything like your father you wouldn’t feel bad for having hurt someone.” He said, putting a hand on your shoulder.

“I hurt Ellie.” You said looking down you were ashamed, fearing that he would hate you now. Feeling tears build up in your eyes.

“I figured it had something to do with her.” He said. Looking up at him, he gave you a sympathetic smile.

“I- did she say something?”

“No she just talks to me when she absolutely has to but Jesse mentioned something about you and Ellie fighting.” He said.

“We got into a fight and she hurt me but she apologized the next day but I wasn’t ready and I said something hurtful.” You said, letting a tear fall.

“Did you mean it?” He asked.

Looking back at him “No! Not at all.”

“It’s okay kid, you were hurt because of whatever she said to you, your reaction was pretty normal. You can still make things right by apologizing and showing her that you care.” Joel said, looking at you.

“I apologized when we were on patrol together but I still feel like shit about it.” You said, wiping your tears away.

“It’s okay, kid. She knows she probably feels like that too because of your fight. Forgiving yourself is hard but when the other person forgave you than you can do it too.” He said. He was worried about you.

“Don’t beat yourself up (y/n).”

Nodding at his words, you gave him a small smile. “Thank you Joel, I don’t know what I’d do without you.” Smiling at your words he pulled you into a hug.

“I care about you kid, I don’t want you to feel bad.” He said.

You almost started crying again at his words. No one ever told you that they care about you, well Ellie did but that was after she hurt you.

“I care about you too Joel, thank you for everything.” Hugging him back.

“Can I ask you something now?” Pulling away you looked at the older man.

“Of course.” Curious about what he wanted to ask you.

“Do you like Ellie?”

Getting shy at that you looked away. “I- Ellie and I aren’t exactly best friends but I do like her, I tried not to but I like her.”

Joel smiled at your words. He has seen the way you and Ellie interacted with each other, to everyone else it seemed like you just liked to annoy each other but he saw the longing looks on your faces whenever the other would look away. He hoped that you two would figure it out someday.

What both of you didn’t know was that Ellie heard the whole conversation, she was leaving her place when she heard you and Joel talk, she wanted to keep walking but then she heard you mention her name and she decided to listen out of curiosity what you were saying about her.

She thought you’d tell Joel about what she said to you but she was surprised when you spared him the details on all the horrible things she said instead you were talking down on yourself, feeling bad about hurting Ellie and then you even confessed that you liked her. She was definitely more than surprised at your confession, she was happy to hear you say that you liked her. She couldn’t help but smile at the thought of you liking her back.

The next day you were all hanging out at Dina’s place, having a few drinks, you noticed Dina hasn’t even touched hers. Curiously looking at her you tried catching her attention without saying anything, not wanting to interrupt Ellie’s and Jesse’s conversation about video games but you noticed she was staring at Jesse. Smirking slightly you knew they’d probably gotten back to together already.

“I’m telling you Jesse my method is way better than yours.” Ellie stated.

“Alright, alright you’re right Ellie.” He put his hands up in surrender. “I’m always right.” Ellie said, smirking she took a sip of her drink.

Jesse groaned at her words, he sat down next to Dina throwing an arm around her shoulder, she leaned into him.

You and Ellie shared a look. “Whoa when did that happen again?” Ellie asked, laughing.

“A couple of days ago.” Dina said, smiling.

“Man you guys are so weird.” You said.

Ellie nodded at your words, winking at Jesse. She was right about them getting back together. Taking a sip of her drink.

“Enough about us how was patrol the other day guys?” Jesse asked.

Ellie immediately started coughing and you looked away, finding Dina’s living room pretty interesting all of the sudden.

Dina smirked at Jesse, both of them aware that something happened while you were on patrol. You and Ellie were always weird around each other but that was a different type of weird now.

“We found a gun store.” Ellie said awkwardly. Why did she have to mention the gun store, now you had to think about you both making out against the wall.

“Yeah... it was a nice gun store.” You said looking at Ellie, you noticed her cheeks were deep red.

“It was a nice gun store indeed.” Ellie agreed, staring at you.

Both Jesse and Dina watched your weird interaction, they both wanted to laugh at your embarrassed faces. Clearly something happened at the gun store.

The room suddenly felt too hot, taking off your hoodie you were left in a shirt, your hair was braided back that meant that everyone could see the marks on your neck that Ellie left when you were making out. You totally forgot about them.

Dina gasped making Jesse turned his head at his girlfriend to see what she’s looking at, noticing her eyes were on your neck his eyes widened at the obvious hickeys. Ellie looked at them weirdly, she looked back at you also seeing the marks now. She felt herself blush even more, remembering how she kissed down your neck.

“Umm wh- what are you guys staring at?” You asked nervously, rubbing your neck.

“What’s that on your neck (y/n)?” Dina asked, smirking at you. You looked over at Jesse to find him smirking as well and Ellie looking looking down at her drink with a blush on her face.

Realizing what she was referring to, you forgot that Ellie gave you hickeys. Feeling embarrassed now you avoided their eyes.

“Um- I- a bug bit me.” You said. Ellie laughed quietly at your ridiculous explanation. You sent a glare her way, making her shut up.

“A bug in the winter?” Jesse asked, smirking.

“Yeah, it was a special bug.” You said. Feeling so stupid right now.

Nodding his head at your words “does the special bug happen to go by the name of Ellie?” Jesse said, making Dina laugh.

Both you and Ellie sat there awkwardly not knowing how to react to their teasing. Ellie looked at you, you looked so embarrassed right now she felt bad for you. “Hey Dina, remember when I walked in on you sucki-“

“Whoa Ellie alright stop we got it.” Dina said, embarrassed. Jesse laughed beside her making her slap his chest.

You giggled, thankful that the attention was off you now, you send Ellie a small smile, her eyes lighting up at the smile that was directed at her.

“Anyone up for never have I ever?” Jesse asked.

“What are you 12?” Ellie asked.

“You’re never too old to play a drinking game Ellie.” Jesse said.

“I’m in, I wanna get drunk.” You said, Jesse happy about your answer he waited for Ellie’s answer.

Looking at Ellie, she agreed.

“What about you Dina?” You asked curiously, raising your eyebrows at her.

“Oh I’m still feeling a bit under the weather, I’ll pass.” She said.

“Alright anyways, never have I ever made out with a guy.” Jesse said

No one had to drink, well Dina but she wasn’t drinking. You all waited for someone to drink but everyone was just sitting there awkwardly. Ellie looked at you curiously, she knew you liked girls but she always wondered if you’ve ever made out with guys before.

“That was lame Jesse, Dina’s not drinking, you’re obviously straight and well we are gay.” You said. Ellie snapped her head towards you, nodding at your words.

“Yeah let me try again, never have I ever made out with a girl.” You and Ellie groaned at that making Jesse smirk, Dina laughed at you.

“What? You said you wanted to get drunk I’m just helping out.” Jesse said, smirking at you. Shaking your head, you took a sip of your drink.

“Alright never have I ever had a crush on the opposite sex.” You said laughing at Jesse, knowing he was the only one who has to drink.

He glared at you taking a sip.

“My turn never have I ever had sex in the woods.” Ellie said teasingly, making Dina and Jesse very uncomfortable. Jesse took another sip, giving Ellie a death glare.

You laughed, “how many times did you catch them doing the dirty?” You asked Ellie, grinning at her.

“Too many damn times.” Ellie said with a disgusted face.

Jesse chimed in “never have I ever made out at a gun store.” He said, smirking at you and Ellie. Dina laughed at the face you made.

You and Ellie both took a sip awkwardly.

“So Ellie was the bug?” Jesse asked teasingly

“No your mother was.” You said, making Ellie snort, she laughed at the face Jesse made.

Dina laughed at Jesse’s facial expression “I always knew your mother was gay Jesse.” You laughed at that.

“Ugh shut up guys.” Jesse groaned.

By the time you were done playing the stupid game all of you were drunk, well except for Dina and she was currently trying to get Jesse to go to bed.

“I’m gonna go home.” You slurred, getting up you tripped over your own feet making Ellie laugh she got up to catch you only for her to lose balance as well, you both fell backwards on the couch, landing on top of Ellie. You started giggling. She started laughing too. Looking down at her, you saw that she was already staring at you. “Hi.” You whispered.

“Hey.” Grinning at you.

“Whoah we leave you guys for five minutes and you already making babies.” Jesse slurred letting himself fall on the couch.

You quickly got off Ellie, sitting down next to her.

“We can’t make babies.” Ellie said.

“That’s what I said to Dina too and boom we got baby on the way.” Jesse said.

“What?!”

“Baby?”

Both you and Ellie said at the same time, snapping your head towards Jesse.

“Jesse!” Dina came back into the room having heard what he said.

“You’re pregnant?” You asked, standing up walking towards her

“Yes, I wanted to tell you guys but I was waiting for the right moment but yeah.” She said, putting a hand on her belly she smiled at you.

“Oh my god I’m gonna be an auntie.” You started crying, it was probably because you were drunk, babies usually didn’t excite you.

Ellie and Jesse started laughing at you.

“Aww (y/n) don’t cry. Come here.” Dina said opening her arms, you hugged her.

“Guess what (y/n)? Jesse said.

Pulling away from Dina you turned around looking at Jesse.

“Ellie’s gonna be an auntie too.” Wiggling his eyebrows at you, “our child is gonna have two gay aunts.” Jesse smirked at you.

“You mean two hot gay aunts.” You said grinning at him making Ellie blush.

“I’m gonna be a daddy, I mean I am one already.” He winked at Dina making her roll her eyes “but yeah you know what I’m talking about.”

Ellie looked at Jesse disgusted.

“Yeah I don’t know about that Jesse. The only daddy I see here in this room is me.” You said grinning at him making Ellie and Dina snort at that.

“Ellie get your girl.” Jesse said trying to get up, he fell back again, too drunk to get up by himself Dina went over to help him.

Ellie got up, putting her jacket on she gave yours too. Putting it on. You said your goodbyes to Dina and Jesse. Hugging them both, congratulating them on Dina’s pregnancy, Ellie watched you, smiling. She congratulated them as well.

Ellie opened the door for you letting you out first, she was about to go out when Jesse grabbed her arm making her look at him “have fun Ellie! And don’t make babies.” He said, smirking at her. She looked at him confused “how are we sup- you know what go to sleep dumbass.” She said before leaving.

Stepping out, she looked at you standing there admiring the snow falling, you looked so adorable right at this moment, she’d have to make a drawing of you based on this moment. But she noticed you looked a little sad all of the sudden. Must be the alcohol Ellie thought to herself.

“Come on (y/n), I’m gonna bring you home.”

“I don’t have a home.” You said, looking down.

“What do you mean (y/n)? Of course you do.” She said, not understanding what you were saying.

“I have a house but I don’t have a home.” You said, sad about having to go home into an empty house. You suddenly looked so small to her, with your guard down. You usually looked so tough and fierce, always ready for any situation but right now you were just a sad girl.

Understanding it more clearly now, feeling bad that you’re feeling this way.

“Do- do you maybe wanna come back with me? Just for tonight?” Ellie asked you, shyly.

Looking at her you noticed she was anxiously waiting for your answer. Blinking a couple of times you nodded your head.

Ellie smiled at you, offering her hand to you, you took it intertwining your fingers with hers you walked back to her place.

Arriving back at her place, she opened the door for you letting you go inside, following you she closed and locked the door, taking her jacket off. You took yours off as well.

“Umm I’m gonna give you something to wear so you don’t have to sleep in your clothes.” She said, grabbing something from her drawer.

You looked around, looking at the video games she had laying around. Grabbing one of them, you noticed it was the one Ellie and Jesse were having a discussion about earlier.

“Here.” Ellie gave you one of her shirts. It was an old band tee, you wondered where she got it from.

“Joel gave it to me a long time ago.” Ellie said, you smiled at that.

“I’m gonna change.” You said.

“Yeah sure.”

You went into the bathroom, getting out of your clothes you put Ellie’s shirt on. It was big and comfy, you’ve never seen her wear it.

Splashing your face with some cold water you looked at yourself in the mirror, you had a permanent scar on your forehead now from the incident at the old police station, it kind of pissed you off but it also made you look kind of badass.

Leaving the bathroom you saw Ellie putting a pillow on her couch.

“I’m taking the couch you know.” You said to her.

“Umm yeah no.” Ellie argued, sitting down so you wouldn’t.

“I’m not gonna take your bed while you sleep on the couch that is probably super uncomfortable.” You said walking towards her.

She looked you up and down, loving the way her shirt looked on you, looking at your legs, she licked her lips, you looked so cute and sexy at the same time. Ellie could get used to seeing you like this.

“I’m taking the couch.” You said, standing in front of her, you put your hands on your hips.

“No you won’t.” Ellie said, already laying down so you can’t.

You really didn’t want to take her bed while she was sleeping on the couch. You wouldn’t mind sleeping on the bed with her either.

“Alrighty then, make some space.” You said.

Ellie looked at you with furrowed eyebrows.

“If we can’t agree on who gets to sleep on the couch, we just have to share it then.” You said.

“Oh.” Ellie started smirking at that. If Ellie knew you’d be okay with sleeping with her she wouldn’t have put her pillow on the couch.

“Or we just share the bed?” Ellie suggested.

“Even better.” You said. Grabbing her pillow you put it back on the bed, sitting down on her bed you looked over at Ellie. She was getting out of her clothes, you looked away quickly not wanting to stare.

After she put on a shirt she turned off the lights, the room illuminated by the moonlight now. She walked over to the bed, laying down she got under the blanket, holding it open for you she looked at you noticing how shy you’ve gotten. “Well come on.” Laying down beside her, she put the blanket over you. You faced each other, staring into each other’s eyes. Scooting closer to her, you smiled at her, she smiled back. She moved your hair out of your face, running her thumb over your scar. Watching her, you tried to read her emotions.

“Ellie?” You whispered.

“Yeah?”

“Can I kiss you?” You asked, shyly.

Smiling at you “you don’t have to ask”

You smiled at her words, moving closer to her you kissed her lips softly, moving her lips against yours. Staying like this for enjoying the kiss. Running her hand down your back, she squeezed your butt lightly making you moan, she smirked into the kiss, moving her tongue into your mouth, she gripped your hips tightly, pushing you back she moved on top of you, making out with you softly, she ran her hand up and down your thigh. Pulling away from the kiss she started planting kisses on your neck, making you moan again. “Ellie.” You sighed softly.

Grabbing her face you smashed your lips back against hers, she smirked at your neediness. Moving her hand under your shirt she touched the soft skin on your hips. Enjoying the touch of her hands on your skin.

Your hands started roaming her body, you loved having her on top of you. You wish you could stay like this forever.

Pulling away from her after a while of making out, you were both breathless, Ellie smiled down on you. Getting off you she pulled you into her, hugging you tightly, you put your arm around her waist hugging her.

Looking up at her you noticed she was already staring back at you, you smiled softly at each other. Kissing her chin softly, her smile widened. Brushing your hair behind your ear she plants a kiss on your forehead. You kissed her lips softly, one last time before going back to hugging her. Feeling yourself getting tired, you whispered a good night to Ellie.

“Good night, babe.” Ellie stayed up for a while longer while you were sleeping in her arms. She looked down at you lovingly. She never thought she’d ever have you in her arms, kissing her and sleeping cuddled up to her but she was so happy in this moment, enjoying every second of it she hoped this wasn’t the last time.

#ellie williams #ellie williams x reader #ellie williams imagine #tlou imagines #tlou ellie

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ijustwant2write · 4 years ago

Text

Father Knows Best-Thomas Shelby x Shelby!Daughter!Reader

(GIF credit to @devileyedbanana)

Masterlist

Tags: @captivatedbycillianmurphy @jenepleurepasbaby @amirahiddleston @bloodorangemoonlight @haphazardhufflepuff @mzcrazy2

Requested by anonymous: ‘Can I request a Tommy x daughter angst one shot where she falls in love with a rival gangster and Tommy asks her to choose, and she chooses her love but then he turns out to be violent and Tommy comes and saves her.’

Characters: Thomas Shelby x Shelby!Daughter!Reader, Finn Shelby x Shelby!Reader (Uncle)

Meanings: (Y/N)=Your name

Warnings: Alcohol, being drunk, swearing, mentions of a sexual nature, family arguments, domestic abuse, weaponry, fluff

(A/N: Matthew is a made up character, AND THIS IS MUCH LONGER THAN I ANTICIPATED)

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I covered my mouth as I giggled uncontrollably, Matthew was shushing me despite chuckling himself. We held onto each other as we stumbled out of the club, our feet aching from all the dancing we had done, struggling to walk in a straight line due to the drinks. As we stood up straight, swaying slightly from the alcohol, Matthew took me in his arms, kissing me sloppily. Neither of us were anywhere near sober.

“You’re so beautiful.” he breathed out, going in for another kiss.

I smiled into it, gripping onto his coat for support.“Tonight was amazing. I don’t want it to end.”

“It doesn’t have to.”

I groaned.“It does though. You know I’m already past my curfew.”

“Your dad should be happy that you’re out making friends.”

“You don’t know anything about my dad then.”

We hesitated to start the walk home, though both knew that Matthew wouldn’t receive the best welcome if he got me back any later. I was in trouble now anyway, but I didn’t care what any of my family thought. Time flew by too quickly when I was with Matthew, it was as if we never had enough of each other. And I wasn’t stupid, my father definitely knew about us. As leader of the Peaky Blinders, he had eyes everywhere, and if he wanted his men to follow me, they would. I had spotted several of them just tonight, but I didn’t care.

Seeing as these men would be reporting back to my dad as soon as the night was over, I didn’t want to wake up to a lecture from him. Instead, I decided to head to my uncle’s house. Finn had given me an extra key, just in case, and we were extremely close in age, he understood what I was going through; he also wasn’t allowed to do anything dangerous, let alone be involved in any plans, even tough he tried.

“You sure your uncle won’t let me in? You can try to be quiet.” Matthew whispered as I stood outside of Finn’s house.

I scoffed at him.“I can be quiet!”

“Well I have yet to experience that.”

“He won’t let you in. I’m sorry Matthew.”

“Don’t be sorry. I’ll see you in the next few days?”

“Of course you will.”

We slowly kissed, hands still wrapped around each other. It was always so difficult to let him go. This time, Matthew was the one to pull away, gently kissing me on the forehead before leaving. I watched him leave until I couldn’t see him before unlocking the door. Although I had been incredibly quiet, I heard a thud, someone (my uncle) was fumbling around, thinking an intruder was here. He had a gun in his hands as he whipped open his bedroom door. The panic in his face was replaced with annoyance.

“For fucks sake (Y/N), what do you think you’re doing?” he sighed, rubbing his eyes.

“Um, coming in from a great night out?” I said, chuckling to myself as I walked into a chair.

“Oh good, you’re drunk. Why didn’t you get the driver to take you back to your house?”

“Because I don’t want to deal with dad. You know he’s awake too, he would shout at me as soon as I stepped foot in the door.”

Finn rolled his eyes.“You were with that prick weren’t you?”

“His name is Matthew and he’s not a prick. He’s my boyfriend. And I know that dad knows about him.”

“You should really stay away from him. He doesn’t come from a good family. We’re in the same circles (Y/N), people tell me things.”

I groaned.“Urgh, I didn’t come here to get told off by someone who is literally two years older than me. I’m going to bed. Feel free to call my dad, tell him I’m fine and that I had a good time, cause I know he won’t ask that.”

“What do you mean?”

“As soon as you call, or he calls you, the first question will be, ‘who was she with?’. Yeah, my dad really cares for me.”

Even though I slept late into the afternoon, I still didn’t feel rested. My head was pounding, I felt as if I would be sick every time I moved, and my feet throbbed, so all in all, signs of a great night out. As I shuffled into the kitchen, Finn was sat at the table, arms crossed and staring at me. Oh no, he was not going to act like a saint right now.

“I’m not dealing with you right now Finn.” I said as I poured myself a cup of tea.

“Tommy’s coming to get you in an hour. Make sure you’re ready.”

I mockingly saluted him.“Yes sir!”

“Come off it (Y/N). I don’t get why you act like this. Sometimes you’re really sweet, other times you’re...”

“Go on, get it out of your system.”

“You can be a bitch.”

“Look, I understand what you’re saying.” I sat down across from him.“But dad really hasn’t paid much attention to me recently. He doesn’t even greet me when I come down for breakfast. I know he’s got a lot on his plate, and it’s a big plate, but lately he’s been really harsh on me.”

“It’s because of Matthew.”

“He’s going to have to drop that soon. I get that I’m his only daughter so he’s overprotective, and because I’m a Shelby, but he doesn’t have to worry.”

“That’s the thing (Y/N). This Matthew has made him worry even more.”

“Why? Because it’s my first serious boyfriend?”

“No because...look, what I tell you now, you can’t say a word of it to anyone else, do you understand?”

“Finn-”

“Do you understand?”

I hesitated, but nodded, my curiosity getting the better of me.

“Matthew is....he’s part of a rival gang.”

I couldn’t help but laugh.“I get you don’t want me to date him, but that’s ridiculous.”

“(Y/N), I’m being deadly serious.”

“No he’s not. I’ve met his family, they’re sweethearts.”

“Because they want you to trust them.”

“You’re being ridiculous.”

“I’m not trying to piss you off, or make up something so you break up with him. He’s dangerous (Y/N), it’s all one big trap. They get Thomas Shelby’s daughter and they can bargain for anything.”

“Wouldn’t it be less hassle to just kidnap me? What if I didn’t fall for Matthew, what would they do then?”

“That’s not the point-”

“No, there is no point to this, at all Finn.”

“(Y/N), please, I’m trying to look out for you.”

“I’m going to get ready. I need to look decent for dad.”

Part of a rival gang? Pathetic. It wasn't even an interesting story. Yes, Matthew was a little wild, he brought out the party girl in me, but I was having fun! As long as he wasn't harming me, nor were we harming anyone else in the process, I saw no flaws with our relationship. We also had our downtime moments, times where we could lie down in each others arms, hint at our futures. Apparently not everyone could see that.

There was a knock at the door, and I sighed to myself, knowing my time of hiding was over. Luckily dressed, looking pretty decent after the night before, I took time walking out of the spare room, hearing some mumbling before I even saw my dad. Although he never showed much emotion anyway, I could tell he wasn't happy, staring me down as I approached him in last night's clothes.

"Morning dad." I greeted him kindly, hoping we would have this conversation away from Finn.

Dad looked at Finn in disbelief, then back to me."Morning? Fucking good morning?"

"Dad-"

"Get in the car."

I obeyed his order but not before saying goodbye to Finn."Thanks for letting me stay."

He just nodded to me, awkwardly waiting by the door as I followed dad outside. I kept up with his usual long strides, bracing myself for what could end up as a screaming match. Thinking about it, I never argued much with dad, but when we did, it was over serious topics, never anything petty. I loved him dearly, he always looked out for me, gave me anything I wanted, ensured that I had a good life he never had growing up. So the guilt growing inside of me was huge, but my stubbornness was strong. I was an adult now, I was allowed to make these decisions.

Surprisingly, there was no driver for us. I slipped into the passenger seat, both of us remaining silent as dad started the drive. I watched the streets of Small Heath pass by, the regulars of the city slowly making their way to work, dirty from the shift the day before, probably drunk to keep themselves warm. It was a sad, poor place sometimes.

"Are we going to talk?" I mumbled, putting my focus on him.

He sighed loudly through his nose."Are you going to listen?"

"Please can we not be malicious about this?"

"Why didn't you just come home last night? Any bar would have let you use a phone, they know who you are."

"Because I didn't want the hassle. And I stayed at Finn's, so I don't understand why you're so angry?"

"You were with that boy."

"Dad, when will you just accept that I'm twenty one and I'm allowed to see people?"

"It's not that. If you had found someone who wasn't trouble-"

"Matthew isn't trouble."

"You don't know everything (Y/N)."

"Oh, don't tell me, he's part of rival gang, right?"

Dad's eyes widened as his head snapped towards me, his gaze flickering between me and the road."You what?"

"Finn told me."

Dad groaned, putting all of his concentration back on the road."Told him to keep his mouth shut. Neither of you seem to be able to follow orders."

I rolled my eyes.

"I saw that."

"Look, I'm sorry for not at least calling last night, I know that was wrong." Dad was silent.

"But I really like Matthew. I don't want you to scare him away, or make up ridiculous stories about him."

"Stories eh? That's what you think they are?"

"I know they are."

Suddenly, dad put his foot down, making us go faster than I liked. He ignored my pleas for him to go slower, somehow not swerving off of the country roads that lead to our house. He was driving at this speed for far too long, skidding on the gravel as we braked in front of the house. Dad hastily got out of the car, whereas I needed a second to get my breath back. He was already walking through the front door by the time I was shakily getting out of the car, stumbling in my heels across the gravel.

I called after him but he wouldn't listen. Storming towards his office, he flung open the doors, not even flinching when they whacked into the walls. Quickly following, I watched his manic actions, shuffling through paper work and slapping down files onto the desk.

"There's your story." he said, pointing at them.

Hesitantly I walked towards him, scanning my eyes over his evidence. There were pictures, reports, files containing personal information. I focused more on the parts about Matthew, reading things such as where he was born, where he had lived, the schools he attended....and none of them matched with what he had told me. There was a portrait picture of him, I didn't know where dad got it from, and another photo slipped out from under it as I picked it up. Only this time, it was a mugshot.

"So, do you still think we're lying?" dad said.

"I...I..." I was speechless.

"You know that everything I do, I do for you. You're my daughter, it's my job to protect you. You need to stay away from that man."

"Why wouldn't he tell me?"

"Did you really just ask that?"

"We've talked about everything. He didn't even hint at it." I was talking to myself at this point."I met his family. Why would they go through all of that? Host that dinner, make me welcome, say such nice things?"

"I didn't take you to be stupid (Y/N)."

"I know what it sounds like. But dad, Matthew wouldn't lie to me-"

"HE'S USING YOU!" he screamed at me."You're a fucking Shelby, you're the daughter of Thomas Shelby, you have a huge target on your head! It's an easy way to get to me, and to find out secrets about us!"

My mouth dropped open in shock."I would never tell him anything they he wasn't supposed to know!"

"Wouldn't you? He seems to have a hold on you, and it's scaring me. I've never seen you like this."

"That 'hold' you're on about is called love! Not that you would know anything about that, seeing as my mother was a whore!"

"Don't you dare speak to me like that!"

"It wouldn't be a surprise would it, if I ended up with a fucked up relationship? Because I had oh such a great example from you. Fucks a random woman, she knows who he is, so she dumps the baby on him, hoping he won't give her away to an orphanage."

"Stop changing the conversation. We are talking about how we get you away Matthew."

“You’re not going to.”

“(Y/N)-”

“I’ve been with him for months, why is this now just coming out? How long have you known about this?”

He didn’t have to say anything but I still got my answer.

“Ah.” I scoffed a laugh.“You have known about this. And for some reason, you have’t decided to mention this.”

“It was for-”

“I’m going to stop you right there. Dad, I am going to speak to Matthew about this.”

“You will not go near him.”

“Yes I will. I’m going to get the truth, right now.”

My words escaped me before I could really think about them. I was already walking away from him, back out to the front door. Opening a cabinet, I searched through the keys for any car, any vehicle that would get me far away from here.

“I’m having someone follow you.” dad informed me.

“I know.”

“You’re stepping into enemy territory.”

“We’re not in the war anymore dad. And you’re not a soldier.”

I finally found the right key, heading towards the only car I had ever driven. Making my way to the garage, I ignored my dad, not even looking at him. I definitely felt guilty for what I had said, and what I was about to do. But I needed to do this myself, I needed to speak to Matthew without the pressure of anyone else.

I was not a good driver. Everyone was safe whilst I was driving, I just wasn’t very fast or great with spacial awareness. In my head, I had expected to be racing to Matthew’s, getting to his in record time. This had ruined my fantasy. Once I did reach his house, I slowly lined up the car with the path, wincing when I bumped into the curb; thank god no one was around to see that.

“(Y/N)?” I heard Matthew call me as I got out of the car. He was approaching me down the pathway of his house.

“Matthew, I need to speak with you, urgently.” I rushed out, pushing him back towards his home.

“Woah, wait, wait. What’s happened? Why are you in last nights clothes?”

“Just get inside.”

By looking at his house, you could tell he was well off. It was in a nicer neighbourhood, it was separate from the other houses and had multiple rooms. I asked him if anyone else was home, and when he said no, I was relieved. We didn’t want them getting involved, and I felt like shouting if this went wrong.

“You’re worrying me (Y/N).” Matthew said.

“Oh, are you worried about me?” I sarcastically said.

“(Y/N), can you just tell me what’s going on?!”

“Are you part of a rival gang against the Peaky Blinders?”

“What?”

“You heard me.”

“What makes you say something like that?”

“My family told me.”

“What makes them think that?”

“Matthew, I’ve seen the evidence. I didn’t admit it to my dad, but I believed him. I’ve seen your real information. You’ve lied to me about a lot of things. And why do you have a fucking mugshot?”

He exhaled through his nose, looking away from me for a few seconds.“I can’t lie anymore.”

“You shouldn’t have in the first place!”

He held up his hands in defence.“Alright, alright, let’s just use our inside voices. I’ll explain everything to you.”

Matthew directed me to his front room, sitting beside me, and although I initially wanted to shuffle away from him, I couldn’t bring myself to do it; especially when he took my hands in his, resting them on his lap. He wasn’t afraid to look me in the eyes, perhaps a sign of him about to tell the truth.

“(Y/N), your family is right. I am part of a company that rivals yours-”

I tried pulling my hands away, but he gripped onto me tightly.

“-but we would never cause any harm. We are only rivals in business. There is no bloodshed, no injuries, no deaths. The only thing we fight over are numbers.”

“That still doesn’t explain everything.”

“I didn’t tell you because I didn’t know if you already knew who I was. You know how it feels to have everyone already judge you based on a name.”

“Don’t use that against me.”

“I’m not. I’m trying to connect with you on this. The mugshot is from a brawl we had with a couple of ex-employees, they wanted to expose us with lies. Unfortunately we were typical men, and apparently that was the only way we thought to solve it. The police were called and I spent a night in a cell, but I was released the next morning.”

“That’s it?”

He nodded.

“You promise?”

“I promise. And my family have not been plotting anything like your father thinks they have. Of course, they had an idea when I told them about you, you know, to ‘unite’ our families to stop the feud. Obviously that was ridiculous because fights don’t just end like that. But when I brought you to them, it was because I was proud of you, I wanted to show them the amazing woman I had found and fell in love with.”

“Love?”

“Yes. I love you (Y/N).”

“I love you too Matthew. I’m sorry for attacking you with all these questions. But even if I tried to convince my dad that he was wrong, he wouldn’t believe me. I’m scared he’s going to try and separate us.”

“Then live with me!”

“What? No I couldn’t do that to you-”

“Of course you can! You’ve seen this house, there’s plenty of room, my family loves you, it would be perfect! And...” he leaned in closer to me, whispering in my ear,“they’re hardly here, so we would have a lot of alone time.”

Although my heart jumped at the thought of living with Matthew, being able to see him everyday, spending every moment with him, I also dreaded telling my dad. I was old enough to make my own decision though. I could move in with Matthew if I wanted, what was stopping me? I believed everything he said, he had an explanation for everything. If Matthew was in a rival gang, using me for their own purpose, wouldn’t he just threaten me or kidnap me when I confronted him? It all seemed like too much effort.

All of that information dad accumulated must have been biased, especially if our families were rival companies. Although I was leaning more towards staying with Matthew, I didn’t want to lose my dad. I would have to be an idiot to believe that he would let me leave home with a man he didn’t like, but on the other hand, I was at the age where I could do what I wanted. Just because I had the last name Shelby didn’t mean I was going to be trapped by it.

There had been a lot of back and forth that day, both emotionally and physically. But here I was once again arguing with my dad. Stupidly, I had let Matthew come along (he was very persuasive), though he stayed in the car. Set on convincing him to let me leave with Matthew, we shouted at each other, screaming our opinions. He didn’t believe a word I said. Tears streamed down my face as I grew more frustrated, pleading him to listen, to give Matthew another chance.

“I don’t know why I’m bothering to ask! I could have left without asking, without even telling you. But I did it out of respect for you.” I suddenly exclaimed.

Dad stopped shouting for a moment, heavily breathing.“Fine. Go then. If you’re so grown up, pack your bags and move onto the next part of your life. I just hope for your sake that I’m wrong.”

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I had never felt such conflict in my heart before. The first month of moving away was extremely hard, I cried most nights in Matthew’s arms. I had loathed every moment of collecting my belongings from dad’s house, saying goodbye to my family because I wouldn’t be seeing them as much as I was used to. They thought the same as dad, all had tried to convince me to stay. But Matthew was always by my side, reassuring me that we could start our own life now, not forgetting our old ones of course, but creating a new one.

And oh, how quickly things changed.

Three months, three months of pure bliss. I was living with my boyfriend, having the joy of seeing him everyday when he came home from work, eating meals with him, sleeping beside him, not having to arrange weeks in advance when to next see each other. Matthew had even started talking more about our future, hinting at marriage, finding our own home to live in. It excited me. I was growing up, doing all the things a person should do. Perhaps this would show dad that I was happy, that he was wrong about those rumours, and I could finally see him again. I missed him so much.

It was like binding a contract with the devil. Once that engagement ring was slipped on my finger, my whole world was flipped. Matthew started staying out late. I knew he wasn’t going out drinking, he didn’t smell of alcohol when he returned, neither could he be cheating because I never caught a whiff of perfume, or found a hair on his jacket, or even see him come home disgruntled; he was just as immaculate as he had been leaving. Sometimes him, his father, his brother and uncle would come home, immediately gathering in the front room and slamming the door shut. They would be in there for hours, deep in conversation. And that scared me, because it reminded me of my family whenever they were scheming.

“Matthew?” I had mumbled late one night, disturbed from my sleep when he opened the bedroom door.

“Go to sleep.” it was an order, no note of sympathy in his voice.

I watched him undress.“Are you alright? I heard you arguing downstairs.”

“What did I just say?” I had never seen someones head snap around so quickly.

“I’m sorry,” I didn’t know why I was apologising,“I just wanted to make sure you weren’t upset.”

“I am now.”

“Why?”

“Because of you! Asking me all these questions! I thought you were smart.” he made a show of collapsing into a chair, starting to untie his shoelaces.

I sat up.“Matthew, there’s obviously something wrong. You know you can tell me-”

He suddenly threw his shoe against the floor, but for a split second I thought it was aimed at me.“Just go to sleep (Y/N)!”

I was scared to move, thinking I would somehow do something else wrong. But when he continued to stare at me, I slowly slipped back under the covers, clinging them close to me, trying to steady my breathing to hide how much I wanted to cry. I listened to Matthew get ready for bed, the silence making me more nervous. He climbed into bed, shuffling towards me. I flinched as he wrapped an arm around me, his body pressed up against the back of mine. Who was this person? What made him act like this?

“I’m sorry darling.” he whispered in my ear.

But I didn’t feel comforted by that, or feel like I should give him forgiveness. And I realised it wouldn’t have even mattered if I did, because it kept on happening.

Smaller things started to annoy him. I would simply ask him what he was doing with his day, and receive an eye roll. He would question why I was wearing a specific outfit, who was I wearing it for? His family would try to interrogate every detail about me, and it was suspicious from the beginning. I wasn’t receiving questions such as ‘How many siblings do you have?’, ‘Do your family get on well?’, ‘Where do they live?’; I wondered if it was because everyone knew about the Peaky Blinders, but it was getting too personal. I had been an idiot to become trapped by this man, however, I wasn’t going to let them use me against my family.

Some days I didn’t know how much I could take of Matthew. I was walking on egg shells around him. I quickly learnt what not to say or ask, how the tone of my voice should be, how I should look. It didn’t matter how many times he was sweet to me, apologised, bought me presents, I didn’t recognise the man I had wanted to marry. His hand held mine tighter, his grip on my waist hurt, and our intimate moments together...everything hurt me, and he didn’t care.

“Writing a letter to a friend?” Matthew startled me from the doorway of our room.

My head whipped around to see him standing there, casually leaning against the door frame.“Yes.” I quickly replied.“Well, it’s for my aunt, Ada.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m asking how Karl is. He’s growing up so fast.”

“Mention anything about me?”

“Of course.”

“Can I read it?”

I handed him the letter, hiding my nerves. He read through it, no expression at first until he looked at me, smirking to himself. That wasn’t a good sign.

“(Y/N), my father was in the war. He’s told me about how they got secret messages out of the trenches.” he smugly said, walking towards a set of drawers and opening the top one. He pulled out a pile of letters, the envelopes opened, and the handwriting was mine.“Being Thomas Shelby’s daughter, I had expected more from you.”

“You’ve lied to me this whole time.” I shuddered at the thought of him reading my letters, begging for someone to help me escape.

“No, I haven’t.”

“You said you were only rivals in business!”I leapt up from my chair.“I fought my family to be with you! I am such a fucking idiot!”

“Isn’t that what we are? A business at the end of the day? Look, you’re here now. We’re happy. I can make us happier once we receive our upcoming bonus.”

“What bonus?”

“The bonus of having the Shelby Company all to ourselves.”

My eyes widened, screeching out as I lunged for him. I landed a good punch to his face, but due to his size and strength, he managed to grab my attacking arms.

“Stop now (Y/N), before you get hurt.”

That was a threat from him, not a concern I may harm myself. But for once I didn’t care. They were going after my family, I would take all the beatings for them.

“You’re a fucking liar! A cruel, terrible, waste of space!” I screamed, pulling myself away from him.“I vowed to never become one of those poor women who had to live this life. You were in my head, and I’ll admit it, you were convincing, but I know who you really are. You’re all a bunch of sad men who feel that they need to murder, threaten and mock anyone in order to make them feel better. You’ll never be as powerful as my dad, it just won’t happen.”

“You’ve grown naive. I did like you (Y/N), once I got a good look at you, I wasn’t angry about the plan of marrying you anymore. And I’ll admit, you’re an interesting woman, easy on the eye which helps. And how loyal you were, standing beside me in everything. Don’t be upset (Y/N), we don’t want any blood on our hands, as long as your family are cooperative. And think, you will be in charge with me once they’re gone.”

“Gone? What do you think you’re going to do with my family?!”

“Nothing. We have a meeting tomorrow, you’ll be coming, and you will convince them to hand it all over to us.”

“I won’t.”

“That wasn’t a request.” he opened one side of his blazer jacket, revealing his gun.

“I would rather die than go against them.”

“You’ve done that already. And I would rather keep your brains inside your head.”

The next morning felt colder, more bitter than it usually did here; there was even a low fog creating a tense atmosphere. Although I didn’t want to comply with Matthew, I knew I had to go to this meeting if I wanted a chance of seeing my family and keeping them alive. Running on adrenaline and anxiety alone, I forced myself to get out of bed, having to get changed under the watch of the man I thought I knew. As I did my hair in the mirror, I had a sudden realisation that I wasn’t me anymore. I looked older, years older even, even though I had only been engaged to this monster for a few months. My skin felt...unusual, not right, it didn’t feel clean. The bags under my eyes seemed to droop more and more every day, as if they were dragging down my eyes with them, and my lips were missing the feeling of a genuine smile.

Matthew kept a hand on my back as we walked downstairs, his family waiting for us. I wasn’t scared to glare at them. They weren’t going to kill me, not yet anyway. I still had some time to live, and I was going to despise them every second. They talked as if I wasn’t there, checking their weapons and the plan. Matthew had managed to confiscate my gun, I was left with my fists.

I was in the middle of the group as we made our way to the meeting point. I knew the area now, we were headed to the back of a factory. There was a lot of noise from the machines, no one would be walking around because they would be working, and Matthew’s family had a very good deal going on with the owner; they pay him large amounts of money to keep quiet, he takes that on top of his rich salary already and keeps quiet.

As we rounded the corner, my heart dropped when I saw just my dad standing there. Out of instinct, I started to hastily move towards him until Matthew grabbed me, gripping onto my arms to keep me in place. I felt like a little girl again, scared and needing her dad to come save her. Although dad was expressionless most of the time, I was worried that he thought I was neglecting them all these months, when really, Matthew had stopped any contact between us.

“Mr Thomas Shelby, when I said about meeting, I didn’t think it would be just yourself.” Matthew’s dad started.“But that’s fine, you’re the only one we want to speak with anyway.”

“A business meeting outside, eh?” dad said.“Why do I think this is heading in another direction?”

“Let’s just get to the point, yes? You know what we want, we’re not going to stop till we get it.”

“Of course.” dad didn’t seem bothered.

“And we’re serious. But don’t worry, there will still be a Shelby within the business once you pass it over.”

Matthew urged me forward, staying very close behind.“Dad, I’ve been trying to contact you but they wouldn’t let me! I-”

“Shut up. That’s not important.” Matthew snapped at me.

“Don’t talk to her that way.” dad lowly said, and I recognised the warning in his voice.

Matthew wasn’t bothered.“She does as she’s told.”

“I fucking don’t!”

I stamped on his foot with my heel, quickly getting out of his grip and turning around, managing to knee him in the head as he doubled over. Another gang member pulled me away, and I didn’t know whether he was ordered to or not, but he held a gun to my temple, his arm in a choke hold around my neck. I had tried, but it was too risky to do anything when my dad and I were clearly outnumbered.

Despite that, dad pulled out his own gun, aiming it at the man.“Let her go.”

Matthew’s dad laughed.“I know you’ll have some of your people hiding around here somewhere. But you’ve seen the weapons we carry today, and how many of us there are. You are under prepared.”

Dad was still for a moment, suddenly whistling. I saw the men around me tense, wondering what my dad could be summoning. As expected, more men started to appear around my dad, a much larger group, some even rounding around the back so that we were surrounded. They all held weapons of some sort; guns, knives, knuckle dusters, anything of the sort. Matthew’s dad tried to not look effected, though you could tell he was shitting himself.

“What were you saying about no bloodshed?" I smugly said to Matthew.

He frowned at me, taking me out of the man's arms and throwing me to the floor. He got out his own gun, once again placing it on my temple.

"I don't want to shoot her. But I will if you don't go through with our deal." he stated.

My hands were scraped, blood already trickling onto the ground. But I didn't moan, I didn't complain, worried that one slight move would set him off and he would shoot.

"You will put down your weapons, give me back my daughter, turn around, and walk away." dad said."We don't want to start a war between us. Look at my men, now look at yours. You will lose, and you will lose your lives along with it."

"How dare you threaten us-"

Matthew's dad interrupted."Shut up Matthew! This doesn’t mean you’ve won Shelby.”

Dad didn’t reply, lowering his gun but the others kept their weapons on display. Matthew’s dad was waiting for a reply, and when he didn’t get one, he sharply turned away. Matthew was shocked, glancing between me and him as he wondered what to do. Although I was desperate to run to dad, I slowly made a move to stand. Matthew kept his eyes glued on me. I slid off my beautiful engagement ring, now despising it, holding it up in front of his face, and letting it drop to the ground.

“In case you were wondering, the wedding is off.” I spat, instantly turning on my heel.

My body broke out into a sprint, throwing my arms around my dad’s neck as I burst into tears. My legs went weak as he clung onto me, reassuring me that I was safe now, I wouldn’t be hurt any longer. How could I have done such a thing? I turned my back on my family for a man I should have known more about. I had to face it, I was a Shelby, and it was going to be difficult to find someone who wanted me for me, not my name.

“I’m so sorry dad!” I sobbed.“Please forgive me! I don’t want to be hated by you forever. I need you. I love you!”

He calmly shushed me, as if I was a baby again.“It’s alright, it’s alright (Y/N). I’ve got you now. You’re my daughter, I would never hate you.”

“I’m sorry! I won’t ever leave you again.”

“Come on, let’s go home, eh?”

“Please.”

“You’re my family, you always will be. I’m always going to protect you (Y/N), always.”

346 notes · View notes

chaozsilhouette · 3 years ago

Text

Turbulent Beginnings

This forms the opening act to Macaque’s story, showing just how different his and Wukong’s early lives were and why he took Wukong’s disappearance so hard.

The idea Macaque was born from the wind was inspired by @animemoonprincess. And yes, I am a shameless fan of Macaque originally having white fur. The angst is just too perfect.

Brace yourselves, this isn’t going to be pretty. I am essentially shoving our boy through an emotional meat grinder.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

On a remote island, a day’s travel from China’s eastern shore, a massive hurricane raged as it had since the beginning of this world. The surrounding storms fed into it as its winds carved stone. No life had dared blossom on its soil out of fear of a painful demise. The merciless storm drank deeply of the waters of the sea, draining all aspects of potential and life before casting it aside. Not even curious spirits were spared.

Various deities had wondered why such a storm existed or why the Jade Emperor allowed such a dangerous presence to continue unchecked. Most believed that since the hurricane was stationary and prove no threat to the established order of the world, it was not important.

One day the hurricane vanished. As though it had never existed. Or rather that it had been transformed into something else.

It was the night of a new moon and with the hurricane gone, the island experienced its first cloudless sky. The only one to witness the momentous occasion was a monkie with pure white fur and six ears. Minding his manners, the nameless monkie bowed to the four winds in greeting.

The newborn proceeded to spend his days searching the island for something. Some clue as to the reason behind his birth. He could hear strange voices and words he didn’t understand yet at the same time could. He knew he wasn’t the only creature alive, so why was he alone?

For food, he walked his way through a cave system towards the sea, where he enjoyed the fish that were drawn in through the whirlpools and the mussels that clung to the sharp rocks. He grew to savor the taste of life, even though there was a part of him that craved something different.

Almost forty years passed before he mustered the courage to leave everything he knew to seek out those voices. He gathered all the driftwood and rope that had drifted onshore over the decades, fashioned it into a makeshift raft, and sailed towards the closest source of voices.

His voyage was actually pretty boring once he cleared the whirlpools.

The only exciting part about it was when that strange fish tried to sink his raft. It was bigger than any fish he’d previously seen with a mouth to match. Didn’t mean it survived past the first blow. Taking a bite Macaque wasn’t sure if he liked this fish. The muscles were tough and the flesh was rough on his tongue. He didn’t particularly like the taste. But there was enough to feed him for a full day.

In the end, he chose to eat a third of the fish’s muscles along with its heart before tossing back into the water.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

Docking on dry land was an experience that would haunt him for years.

At first, he was filled with wonder at the sight of buildings and new creatures riding rafts far bigger than his.

When he stepped onto shore the whispers began.

The creatures, who he later learned were called humans, were pointing out his ears. They acknowledged his obvious intelligence. He heard them grip wooden instruments tightly. It was as if they expected him to do something.

No one made a move against him. No one approached him, but he could tell he wasn’t wanted. Everywhere he turned he saw eyes that cursed his every existence.

He didn’t stay in that village for long. In his mind, satisfying his curiosity wasn’t worth being stared at as though he was the source of all evil.

Demon.

That is what they called him. Was that what he was?

He didn’t know, but he didn’t like it.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

He aimlessly wandered the countryside for far too long.

The first act of kindness he received was from a couple who could not have children of their own. He stumbled upon them by accident, but instead of the normal fearful expressions he’d come to expect they greeted him with genuine smiles and an offer to join them for dinner.

They took him in and treated him like family. He became the son they always wanted. They taught him how to properly speak and how to walk comfortably on two limbs. They blessed him with a name.

They were kind and nurturing. In another world, they may have been called bodhisattvas. But sadly, due to them being ordinary mortals, his time with them only lasted four decades.

He buried them with love but grew resentful of his weak emotions.

He learned what it was like to have someone welcome him home after a long day. He learned to savor the taste of a mother’s home-cooked meal. He enjoyed having a father figure who was willing to teach him old military tactics. He experienced friendly competitions to see who could paint the most accurate portrait of a flower they saw earlier that day. It was everything he never knew he craved and then it was gone. Leaving him with an empty home and a broken heart.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

Nearly fifty years later he joined a band of traveling performers.

Their natural oddities allowed them to see who he really was and welcome him into their party. With their compassion, he was granted the opportunity to heal. He learned that despite the group’s large size, very few of them had any direct blood relations. What made them special was how they created their own family and turned what many called strange into something beautiful. Out of respect, he delved into the world of entertainment, found he had a natural talent for it.

When he took the stage people assumed he was in costume, but that didn’t matter. The applause of the audience was a gift he cherished. The sheer passion this family expressed through every second in life warmed his heart beyond words. They were just what he needed to bring him out of his depression.

Alas, it was not meant to stay.

One night their camp was ambushed by a group of demons. They were nothing special, hardly worth mentioning. But for him, back then, it was a fight he never imagined. He could easily handle human bandits, so could his family, but never had he traded blows with a small army of his fellow demons. With the rising of the sun, Macaque stared at the cruelly bright sky covered in blood. All around him bodies lay scattered, life essence soaking into the ground. Despite being tasked with fighting off nearly five dozen demonic opponents he managed to survive with barely a scratch, but he was alone. Again.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

He tried to change things by sticking to his fellow demons. At least they lived longer.

Somehow that ended up with him becoming the apprentice to a demon healer for almost a century. She was a cold-hearted bitch with a heart of gold. Meticulous in her work, masterful in deduction, and short-tempered with the foolish. She gave everything to her practice and expected the same from him. It was bitter work, but he found it fulfilling. The knowledge that he now possessed the ability to restore others to peak condition settled some unknown part of his soul.

Of course, they would have visitors who wished to take advantage of her skills or steal the medicine. Between the two of them, they protected their clinic, but they weren’t always together. While she may try to hide it, she wasn’t the strongest demon out there. Apparently, the entire reason she got into medicine was to uncover why she was so weak. Centuries of research turned up nothing, but it did make her incredibly skilled at using poisons with her knives to compensate.

One day after he returned from gathering ingredients, he pulled back the door to find the shop in disarray, five unknown bodies slowly dying of extensive blood poisoning, and his master bleeding out from her severed arms. She always said she had no intention of entering Naraka alone.

Guess she kept her word.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

The cycle repeated itself over centuries. He would experience a brief window of happiness only for it to be savagely stolen from him, leaving him to mourn and curse his weak heart.

The small glimmers of kindness humanity showed him only made him curse their race even harder when he couldn’t walk into a village without being harassed. The humans who had proven stronger were sadly a rare breed. He was rare to encounter one a century and often they perished at the hands of their kind rather than by demons.

There were times when the ignorance had gotten so bad he’d taken to traveling with a constant glamour, disguising himself as an average human. Whenever he was in the presence of other demons, he allowed his true form to manifest, however, he made it look like he only had a single pair of ears. Standing out was the easiest way to wind up in a complicated situation he had no interest in trying to defuse.

That’s not to say his time was wasted.

Quite the contrary, he had learned much during his travels. He could hardly be compared to the happy young monkie, who was ignorant of the dangers and hardships this world held. In a sad attempt to fill the void, Macaque sought out wisdom and strength. He located masters of both the mystic and martial arts. He may have had to lie about his age, he was becoming quite the accomplished liar, but the results were more than worth it. With every stop, he found himself growing more certain of his strength and his identity.

Eventually, he discovered a strange monastery hidden in a cave in the face of a mountain.

He had never seen anything like it during his travels. But what truly drew his attention was the feeling the temple exuded, every stone exuded a strange aurora. Something powerful dwelled within, powerful yet there was an undeniably human quality to it all.

Hiding beneath his usual glamor, Macaque approached the temple with the desire to discover exactly what was being taught. Before he knew what was happening, he was speaking to the immortal sage who was running the joint. Master Subhuti welcomed him to his home and offered some tea. The disguised monkie was bombarded by dozens of questions, all of which he attempted to answer as though he was a normal human.

The master welcomed him as his newest disciple and showed him his new home. Later he learned the master could see through his disguise and sensed his potential. Apparently, the old immortal believed that the monkie would do well to learn his disciplines and he was fascinated by the monkie’s natural talent.Said something about how with proper guidance only the Buddha would be able to peer past his façade.

The monkie even received a new name to celebrate his rebirth. From that day forward he was Liu’Er Mihou, or the Six-Eared Macaque. He liked it. While he cherished the name his first family gifted him, he felt this was a good sign. A tribute to show that he was a changed monkie.

Regardless, he refused to drop his glamor. He had seen too many demons be cast out and attacked for getting sloppy. The other students were not thrilled about the newcomer showing them up and he wasn’t willing to give them a true reason to despise him. He learned quickly, more so than any other human disciple, but that put him at odds with those who were still struggling after years of training.

Macaque distanced himself from the others. They weren’t that interesting anyway. He didn’t care that they talked about him behind his back or were fully aware he could hear them. He couldn’t risk getting close so soon. He was determined to break the cycle. He didn’t care about immortality. He didn’t care about obtaining power. All he wanted was to end the pain. So far things had been working out in his favor.

Then heshowed up…

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

That trice damned monkie with peach-colored fur and markings like a golden mask. He was so naïve about the world. He treated everything as though it was some exciting game. His upbeat energy made Macaque sick. Some twisted part of him wanted to snap his neck just to end it, but a small part was fascinated by it. The other monkie reminded him of a time he had almost forgotten.

The Monkey King, or Sun Wukong, didn’t bother hiding his true appearance. Truthfully, Macaque wasn’t sure he knew how or that he should. He didn’t seem to notice how other students would keep their distance or how they kept their conversations as brief as possible without crossing the threshold into being considered rude.

He was so earnest and happy, it was painful. The new monkie pestered everyone about everything, it was like dealing with a newborn, but it seemed Macaque was his favorite to bother. The worst part was how he stared at Macaque as though he could peer past his glamour. Although Macaque wasn’t sure if that was truly possible. The Master could, but he dedicated centuries to refine his skills. Wait. How old was this annoyance? Perhaps he could smell he wasn’t like the other disciples.

Either way, he knew it was just a matter of time until the truth got out. He just didn’t expect it to be when he was changing.

Each student was offered a meager room for privacy. They were all the same size and offered little to no space for any customization, but the walls were enchanted to cut out sound whenever the doors were closed.

Behind those flimsy walls was the only time Macaque allowed his glamor to drop. While he valued being cautious, even he couldn’t keep up the glamour indefinitely, much less when he was asleep.

It was in that small space of safety that he discovered he wasn’t alone.

He had just allowed himself to relax when a smiling face covered in peach fuzz was shoved into his own.

“I knew it! You’re like me.” Sun Wukong happily exclaimed, stars practically dancing in his eyes.

“Shut up.” Macaque clamped his hand over the other’s mouth. Checking to ensure no one else was present and the door was shut, he faced the intruder. “Have you told anyone?” He hissed, while berating himself for failing to check the ceiling. You always look up when scanning a room, he knew that.

“Nope. Why are you hiding? You’re beautiful.” The cheerful demon spoke as though they were old friends. His golden eyes took in every hair of his fellow monkie’s true appearance.

“I’m a demon. And there is nothing beautiful about me.” Macaque growled.

“Yes, there is.” Wukong insisted. “You didn’t answer my question. Why are you hiding? The Master let me in, I wager he knows about you, so why?”

Sighing, Macaque massaged the bridge of his nose. “I have been hurt enough times to know keeping a low profile is optimal in survival. It is better to keep one’s head down than risk getting called out.” From observation, he knew the newer student wouldn’t leave until he received answers, so the best option was to just give him what he wanted and pray he knew enough to leave.

“That’s no fun.” Wukong stuck his tongue out in distaste. “You shouldn’t have to hide who you are. We were born this way.” He jumped high into the air only to catch himself on his tail with a cheeky grin. “So, they’ll just have to deal with it.”

“Cute speech. But my answer is no. Now leave.”

“Don’t worry. We’ll fix that attitude right up.” Thankfully Wukong left, but not before sending a smile laced with mischief his way. “See you tomorrow.”

Macaque prayed to every deity that would be the end of it. But even he knew it was a futile attempt.

“Do you have a tribe?” Wukong asked, hanging by his tail from Macaque’s favorite tree.

A startled Macaque blinked at the random question. “A what?”

“A tribe. A family. A place to call home?” Wukong asked smoothly even if he wasn’t familiar with the term family until recently he knew it was important.

“Not anymore.” Glaring Macaque returned his focus to his meal.

“Aw.” Wukong knew that look. He had seen plenty of monkeys wear that arura after watching other tribe members die. “Then you should come with me!”

“What?”

“Yeah. You can join my tribe. There are dozens of us back home. Plenty of food and water, you’ll constantly be surrounded by others like us.”

“Other demons?”

“No.” Wukong smiled as though he told a funny joke. “Other monkeys.”

“There is no reason for me to join you.” Macaque stated, wishing he could finish his lunch in peace.

But Wukong wasn’t letting him go that easily. “And there’s no reason for you to refuse.” He stated, ignoring any and all social cues or common sense for respecting personal space.

It went on like that for years. Every day Macaque would awake to find gold eyes staring at him, waiting for his answer to change. Breaks were spent dodging the hyperactive monkie as he tried to eat alone. Training sessions soon found him sparring with the same partner.

The monkie was stubborn no doubt and Macaque feared his actions were slowly breaking down his walls. The pale furred monkie missed having a connection. He adored being able to talk to others, but whenever he opened up he only got hurt.

But maybe, maybe this time could be different…

Wukong was training to obtain immortality. He had already proven to be stronger and more clever than anyone he’d known. The simian showed that he wanted to know him better. He constantly tried to touch his fur, something he called grooming, which felt pretty nice.

Maybe…maybe this time he could truly have a home.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

A streak of light accompanied by a sharp whistle pierced the night sky. For a brief moment, it vanished before exploding in a beautiful display of color and light.

On the monastery’s rooftop, Wukong backflipped in joy at the sight, his golden eyes wide. “Happy New Year!” The monkie cried. In the village below, he could make out dozens of voices echoing the greeting.

It didn’t matter how many times he saw them, fireworks were a sight he always adored. “This has got to be mankind’s greatest invention!” The flowers of fire were simply too beautiful. So unique. Nothing on Flower Fruit Mountain compared to such beauty, it made him thankful he decided to leave.

From the corner of his eye, Wukong noticed that his companion was clutched his ears wincing with every detonation. “You okay, bud?”

“I’m fine. Just loud.” Macaque said. He was truly questioning his sanity by joining Wukong on the roof. Normally he barricaded himself in his room, but his friend was so thrilled about sharing their first New Year together he couldn’t say no.

“Oh.” Somehow the new set of fireworks didn’t look that attractive. “We can go inside if you want.” They were beautiful, but nothing was worth feeling helpless as his friend curled up in pain.

“I’ll be fine. I’m adjusting to the volume. No different than punches that break the sound barrier, right?” Macaque tried flashing a confident grin to varying success.

Wukong suspected that Macaque was lying, but learned enough to know further prying would just cause the other monkie to simply shut out the world. “I’m glad you’re coming with me.”

“You made a persuasive argument.” Anyone who could harass him for nearly five years straight proved their determination.

Wukong playfully stuck his tongue out. “Hehe…Seriously though, I’m happy you chose to be part of my tribe. No one should be alone.”

“Then why have I been for so long.”

“I doubt even Master knows. But you won’t be able to say that anymore.” Wukong wrapped his arms around his best friend. Pulling him close, Wukong faced the fireworks, unconsciously grooming Macaque as he savored every pop of color.

Beneath those gentle digits, Macaque steadied himself against the soothing heartbeat of the one he slowly learned to trust. As the display continued, the pale monkie learned to appreciate the human’s creations. Turns out they weren’t so bad so long as you have the right company.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

“I’m sorry. You’re what?!” Macaque’s response was perfectly justified. There was no way he just heard what he thought he heard.

Wukong flashed a blinding grin. “I’m heading to the Celestial realm. I’ve been given a position in Celestial Bureaucracy.” Not seeing any problems whatsoever.

“Why?” Just why? From everything he heard about those stuck-up deities, they would never hand over a position to anyone without requiring the completion of an impossible task, much less to a demon. Least of all a demon who has done nothing but terrorize others and unleash chaos whenever he went.

“Don’t know. But I got to go right now.” Wukong shrugged as he finished packing. The Gold Star of Venus was waiting just outside the waterfall.

“But what about Flower Fruit Mountain? What about your subjects? What am I supposed to do? How long are you going to be gone?” Macaque fired off a rapid stream of questions. Panic was beginning to take hold.

Wukong, however, was as calm and confident as ever. “Stop worrying so much. Look I’ll be back as soon as I can. Until then you’re in charge.” He finished as though it was obvious.

“Me!” A white tail nearly burst into twice its normal size in shock. “But I have no idea how to run a Court!”

“Neither do I. Not in the traditional sense at least. Look just keep an eye on things. Protect the monkeys from hunters and malicious demons. Sometimes one of the allied demon kings will ask for some help. It’s nothing you haven’t helped me with before. I’ll be back before you know it. I’m sure you’ll be able to handle things until I get back.”

Seeing his companion and good friend growing even more lost, Wukong closed the distance and took his face in both hands. “This is a good thing. If I can make this work, none of us will ever have to worry about being hunted or not having enough food ever again.”

In a snap, Macaque grabbed the king’s arms. “What if I don’t care about any of that? What if I just want you to stay?”

For the first time in their conversation, Wukong’s cocky attitude vanished replaced with a loving smile. Gently prying Macaque’s claws off his shirt, Wukong placed his cheek on a palm as he kissed the knuckles of another. “I can’t. This is too good an opportunity to pass up. This isn’t goodbye. I’ll keep in touch. The time will fly. We’ll make this work. Trust me.”

“Alright, Wukong. I trust you.” Macaque said, ignoring every fiber of his being that screamed this would end poorly.

“If things go wrong, remember I’m just a telepathic call away.” Summoning his cloud, Wukong back flipped onto it with his bag. “Monkey King, out!”

One sonic boom later and he was gone, along with a good chunk of the cave walls.

“Hpmh. That’s my idiot.”

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

How did this happen? How did this happen?!

One moment they were fighting for their lives against the army of the Celestial Realm and the next Macaque bore witness to Wukong being carted away in a diamond snare.

Now as he stared at the charred remains of what once was a growing village of monkeys, Macaque felt something within him change.

For almost two months he had burned in celestial fires. The sounds of the dead and dying rang out, making his namesake almost bleed. He choked on the ashes of the mortal monkeys. The air had a strangely sweet and bitter taste to it.

Macaque lost count of all the times he charged back into the fires to save as many heartbeats as he could. He wasn’t sure but he suspected he blacked out more than once. With every heartbeat that stilled before he could reach them, a part of him followed them into Yama’s realm.

Finally, the fires had died down. They didn’t have anything left to burn.

All around him he saw the pitiful leftovers of what was once a thriving community. He had treated the survivors the best he could, but he lost his medical equipment in the blaze. The only ones he didn’t have to worry about were the monkeys Wukong made immortal, but he did what he could to ease the pain.

But still, he wondered why…why were they staring at him as though they were confused?

Maybe he was overthinking everything. He just worked through 49 days without any sleep. Everything was stable for now. The best course of action was to wash off the ash and get some much-deserved rest.

There was nothing the Celestial Realm could do to Wukong that he couldn’t handle. Besides Macaque didn’t even know how to get there even if he was at full strength. Wukong couldn’t die so it was only a matter of time before someone tripped up allowing him to return home.

He just had to be patient.

Stepping into the clear river, Macaque’s jaw almost dropped as the water around him immediately turned gray. He didn’t realize he was that filthy.

He started scrubbing himself, ducking under the water to ensure he didn’t miss a spot. He had to move a few times due to the sheer amount of shoot and ash that clung to him. The entire cleaning process took a full hour before the water ran clear.

Stepping out, Macaque felt more refreshed than he ever remembered. Shaking to remove as much access water as possible, all the towels were soot so he had to make do, he paused by the waterside to see how much fur he lost. But what he saw met none of his expectations.

Instead of fur that invoked images of the moon, he was cloaked in the color of the darkest ink.

“What happened to me?”

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

Five hundred years.

Five hundred years he searched, for any trace of the legendary Five-Fingered Moutain Buddha used to trap Sun Wukong only to find nothing. Macaque scoured far and wide. Neither the winds nor the shadows could lead him towards his friend.

He picked fights with countless demons who claimed to witness the great Monkey King brought low. It barely took two punches before they broke down crying how it had been nothing but a lie, how they only repeated rumors.

He bargained for any information he could find, but all accounts claimed the mountain didn’t exist. Many refused to answer him on principle of not interfering with the Celestial Realm’s issues. Their last mistake. Others took Wukoong’s punishment as a sign to amass as much power as possible out of fear that they would be targeted next.

Macaque had witnessed the formation of more alliances and territory grabs in the past century than had been recorded in the last thousand years. Demons were becoming more power-hungry and suspicious, which meant even more trouble for the humans. Things were becoming so chaotic, Macaque had to wonder if it was planned.

But he couldn’t dwell on that.

He hadn’t visited Flower Fruit Moutain in years. His clones kept guard, but slowly he was losing the drive to keep replenishing them. The only reason he called that mountain home was because of Wukong. It wasn’t home without him.

But he had to keep looking. Had to keep trying. He would find his friend.

Somehow.

§~~~~§~~~~§~~~~§

He tricked himself into thinking this would be different. That he would no longer be alone. That finally he had found a family he could keep.

He was an idiot!

The truth was he was no different than anyone else. The world was Sun Wukong’s toy chest and Macaque was merely a shiny new trinket to bat around until he grew bored. Seeing him with that group, knowing that he chose them over their past, was too much.

He was sick of being left behind. He had been left alone so many times. What made him think he couldn’t be replaced?

He could have attacked, ripped their precious monk to pieces, he could have...should have...but he was tired.

Returning to Flower Fruit Mountain was a chore, but one he swore he would never complete again. The monkeys questioned his return, asking where their king was and if he’d return soon. Macaque ignored them all. He simply walked to the part of the manor he and Wukong had shared for years, where he had been waiting for his return.

Staring at all the knickknacks and souvenirs they had collected from their adventures, Macaque made up his mind. Grabbing a large sturdy bag, he swiftly packed his essentials. In another, he packed non-perishable goods and water containers.

Stepping out, a flash of something peach-colored caught his eye. Spinning around, hope burning a hole in his chest but his dreams once more were proved false. It was just the special peach tree Wukong had planted from the leftover pit he had saved from his time in the Celestial Realm. Apparently, it had reached maturity and was proudly bearing the first fruit Macaque had seen despite having been planted nearly half a millennia ago.

Macaque wasn’t sure why it was so special, Wukong just winked and said it was a surprise for when they could share a fresh one. Feeling something wet on his arm, Macaque looked down to see his hand stretched towards the tree and the memories he held. Feeling his cheeks, he realized he was crying, which was strange as he didn’t think he had any tears left.

Spurred by longing and spite, Macaque plucked six peaches from the tree and stuffed them into his bag. It wasn’t like Wukong was going to miss them. And he needed the food.

#lego monkie kid au #Vanishing Shadow Au #six eared macaque #liu er mihou #sun wukong #abandonment issues #no communication #angst #white macaque

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