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#to kill her
thedisablednaturalist · 8 months
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Im fucking sobbing looking at the new black footed cat at Utah's Hogle zoo
Shes just a fucking baby
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Baby with a 60% successful kill rate
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pocket-size-cthulhu · 6 months
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I'm a cryptid in Stardew valley. I live on the outskirts of town. I disappear for days on end, purchasing daily one-way tickets to the calico desert. Nobody knows where I go while I'm there. Can occasionally be found fishing at random spots throughout town. I am never not running on at least one triple shot espresso. I take the abandoned minecarts to get around and am frequently seen disappearing into the sewers. I carry a sword for some reason. Once every week or two I will stride into your bedroom to deliver you your favorite meal. I'm a self-made millionaire. I attend all the town events and will go to your concert in the next town over. I have donated approximately 2583 items to the local museum and singlehandedly revitalized the town community center. There are rumors I can talk to junimos. I'm friends with the local wizard
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marypsue · 10 months
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Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.
All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.
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mihotose · 6 months
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always brother
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angelfic · 9 months
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annabeth and grover frantically submerging percy in water the way you’d put an iphone in a bowl of rice
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edgarallenp0e · 3 months
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Finding things on her Pinterest learning how to say “let’s go on a date” in Japanese that I know she’s trying to learn for this new job can only mean one thing
She’s already moved on & met some Japanese dude at her new work that she’s started flirting with
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kaitcake1289 · 5 months
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in paris you gotta sleep with one eye open
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moghedien · 3 months
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Lae’zel’s romance arc is literally everything like it’s a one night stand. It’s a two night stand but she pretends she isn’t dying to be with you again. She’s a domme. She’s a bottom. She doesn’t believe in love and doesn’t like to cuddle. She thinks you’re weak for showing interest in her. She thinks she’s weak because she can’t stop thinking about you. She wakes you up in the middle of the night and makes you duel her because she doesn’t know what else to do about being obsessed with you. She cries and confesses her devotion to you if you win. She cries and confesses her devotion to you if you lose. She will tell everyone about your sexual exploits without shame. She’s embarrassed if you try to kiss her in public. She growls at you if you stop kissing her public. She is extremely possessive of you. She wants you to be as extremely possessive of her and is the most visibly heart broken if you cheat on her. She takes half the game building up the courage to ask you to cuddle. She changes her entire perception of the world because you showed her to was ok to approach things differently. She gives you multiple terms of endearment. She’s terrified that your relationship will end after all of this is over. The climax of her romance is holding her hand.
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hellenhighwater · 3 months
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Whereabouts do you live, roughly speaking, and what drew you to that place in particular?
I'm in Michigan, and that's as specifically as I will answer that question! We have really lethal lakes.
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thelilylav · 1 year
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Aziraphale is the most character ever. He ran out of ideas so he declared war on hell. He canonically says fuck. His favourite colour is yellow. He’s literally an angel and can speak every language on earth but still isn’t fluent in french. He told his boyfriend to shoot him for his magic act and made him go through with it when their miracles weren’t working. He gave away his flaming sword and then lied about it for the next 6000 years. He has a bookshop that never sells books. No one’s doing it like him.
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maria-ruta · 8 months
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"what if chilchuck was a butch?" we thought
and Ryoko said - "say no more!" - and made Meijack, can you believe it???
anyway I'm surprised nobody's done it before, you can have it!
original panels under read more
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p.s. - she just doodled chilchuck genderbend once and couldnt let go of the design and BAM Meijack was born lol its so funnt tbh. but fucking valid
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townofcrosshollow · 1 year
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Shocked how many people think you can just turn on a computer and leave it on for weeks or months or years and never turn it off and it'll be fine. Computers need their sleep, and sleep mode does not count
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wusnus · 8 days
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I love mabel and bill and i want to see them being bffs but i cannot see an interaction between them going any way other than this
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rwsdarw · 8 months
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got sick recently so here sillies
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ironinkpen · 4 months
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there's something so poetic about kipperlilly copperkettle—who hated one of her classmates for daring to be better than her and having a dead dad, who refused to improve herself and instead chose to be bitter and entitled, who was so obsessed with being Special and Important like she felt she deserved that she willingly worked with a rage god, betrayed her party, and killed her friend—getting killed by fucking. Hold Person. her fancy optimal build IMMEDIATELY folding in the face of riz's cleverness and experience and applied knowledge. she spends years fixated solely on racking up EXP and getting the Best Abilities, and then when she dies, she's killed not in glorious combat but by a clever, practical application of a 2nd level spell that she NEVER would have ever thought of using because she has no creativity or adventurers' spirit, cast by the same classmate she always hated with a watch his dead dad gave him.
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fierylittleniece · 10 months
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Roxy: *excited for the holidays* Mun: *stares at her* When was the last time I killed you? Roxy: Wait please-
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