#to kill her

[casually-salad]

im writing my first proper fanfiction in litteral years (( i keep all my writing to myself usually )) and god i am so bad at not making things slightly horrorish . like man . oops

[stealingpotatoes]

tried to tell my faithful eunuch Tucker that he was basically tumblr famous, but he was too focused on defending the homestead to care

[humming-fly]

I love how Gerald was trying to keep Shadow from spoiling anything about the future meanwhile literally everything Shadow says and does around Maria is the biggest death flag ever

[marypsue]

Keep seeing that post where OP starts like 'Thinking about...grieving the undead' and then adds on about like. Real life situations where people have not died but have left your life and you would have reason to grieve them.

All respect, that's an important concept, but that is not what I am thinking about when I read 'grieving the undead'.

[eggdrawsthings]

It's the best decision I'll ever make

[mothmothwoth]

Found myself strangely obsessed with Skizz and Lizzie… there are apparently brain chemicals in there

[wusnus]

I love mabel and bill and i want to see them being bffs but i cannot see an interaction between them going any way other than this

[warden-anders]

the way that irving and helly's body language INSTANTLY switched from conflict to comfort as soon as helena switched out was INSANE. he cradled her so fiercely AND SHE CLUNG BACK. irving knew he wasnt going to come back from that, but helly was worth more to him than his life was at that point. all she knows is that she's cold and wet and that irving was there, and of course irving wouldnt hurt her, so she embraces him back! anyway they love each other theyre family and i need to bite something

[angelfic]

annabeth and grover frantically submerging percy in water the way you’d put an iphone in a bowl of rice

[chloesimaginationthings]

William Afton is very normal about his wife in FNAF

[inkskinned]

okay is she being actually immature or is it just a woman over 30 expressing a human experience you find to be immature.

like yeah. at certain ages... let shit go. im not defending the real immature shit. im not defending the karen you're picturing. i worked in retail i hate those people too. (once somebody got mad at me because she didn't like how our winter window decor was a snowman smoking a pipe. i wish i was joking).

but men at 57 will write books about how 17 year old girls are soooo sexy. they will invent worlds where women have to be naked for "armor reasons." they will write songs that treat women as objects. people rush to defend them. meanwhile a woman at 35 will be like "heartbreak is hard, actually" or "i feel betrayed by a friend" or "i am struggling with something emotionally." immediately people will say stuff like this woman is 35 by the way. by the way this woman is SO OLD to be experiencing this. BY THE WAY.

im 31, almost 32. the other day a poet was blasted online because at her "big age", she had written a poem about feeling unloved. top comment was "this woman is 29 by the way." this woman is too old to still be useful, by the way. she has to behave better . maybe if she was a good wife and mother she could stop existing loudly, and the story could continue on without her. this woman has served her purpose, by the way. she's so cringe, by the way. at 29 - so old! - she still hasn't figured out that her existence should be one of shame.

[edgarallenp0e]

Finding things on her Pinterest learning how to say “let’s go on a date” in Japanese that I know she’s trying to learn for this new job can only mean one thing

She’s already moved on & met some Japanese dude at her new work that she’s started flirting with

[rookanisstuff]

Rook got her dance

[thelilylav]

Aziraphale is the most character ever. He ran out of ideas so he declared war on hell. He canonically says fuck. His favourite colour is yellow. He’s literally an angel and can speak every language on earth but still isn’t fluent in french. He told his boyfriend to shoot him for his magic act and made him go through with it when their miracles weren’t working. He gave away his flaming sword and then lied about it for the next 6000 years. He has a bookshop that never sells books. No one’s doing it like him.

[kaitcake1289]

in paris you gotta sleep with one eye open

[moghedien]

Lae’zel’s romance arc is literally everything like it’s a one night stand. It’s a two night stand but she pretends she isn’t dying to be with you again. She’s a domme. She’s a bottom. She doesn’t believe in love and doesn’t like to cuddle. She thinks you’re weak for showing interest in her. She thinks she’s weak because she can’t stop thinking about you. She wakes you up in the middle of the night and makes you duel her because she doesn’t know what else to do about being obsessed with you. She cries and confesses her devotion to you if you win. She cries and confesses her devotion to you if you lose. She will tell everyone about your sexual exploits without shame. She’s embarrassed if you try to kiss her in public. She growls at you if you stop kissing her public. She is extremely possessive of you. She wants you to be as extremely possessive of her and is the most visibly heart broken if you cheat on her. She takes half the game building up the courage to ask you to cuddle. She changes her entire perception of the world because you showed her to was ok to approach things differently. She gives you multiple terms of endearment. She’s terrified that your relationship will end after all of this is over. The climax of her romance is holding her hand.