#to kageyama's mindset

[causenessus]

I HIT 30 TAGS WAYY TOO FAST BUT THIS WAS SO GOOD RYE OMG PLEASE EVERYONE READ THE NIGHT SHIFT PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT!!! (rest of my tags are under cut <3)

the night shift — warmth

day 1 | masterlist | day 3

now playing: behind the moon shadow by lamp

kageyama watches as she rings up the last group of teenaged boys, the surplus of energy drinks and candies and chips failing to concern him. he thinks of her in her drunken, vulnerable, and giggly state, and her now, shielded and strong-eyed. the difference is evident in her stance, in her posture, in her tone. the group filters out and the jingle of the door marks the end of the night shift.

they follow their usual routine -- wiping down counters, taking note of stock, shutting off the heater -- and they move in tandem as they do so.

except, this time, she waits at the door.

"what are you doing?" he asks. his voice cracks ever so slightly.

she laughs at him, the noise filled with a heavy warmth that he finds unfamiliar. "waiting for you, of course. did you forget i was treating you tonight?"

he wants to tell her that he could never forget. that it never left his mind the entire shift. instead, he mutters, "a little, yeah."

again, she laughs, and it's whole. a far cry from what he perceived of her before, based on the cold shoulder she'd given him months prior.

the lights flicker off behind them, just like last night and every other night. she lifts a hand to her eyes to protect from tonight's harsher winds, with a sheepish admission that she doesn't quite have the funds to get something for either of them. "is it alright if we head to my place, instead? i can make you something," she offers.

he nods faster than he should.

——

it's awkward.

the lamps scattered around the house illuminate the kitchen and the dining table where he sits with his hands folded neatly on his lap and his leg bouncing up and down incessantly. despite all the uncomfortable silence, he feels a warmth that he hadn't experienced in a long, long while. maybe it's the air, he thinks, or the lighting, or the steam rising from her bubbling pot. but he doesn't think of comfort.

she stands over the stove with her sleeves rolled up to her elbows and her weight shifted to one leg. two packs of ramen reside on the counter beside her, both ripped open with tiny remnants of uncooked noodles. he watches her crack an egg in with one hand, then another egg with another hand. the pot stirs, and the water boils some more before simmering down to rest.

"spicy foods are great for winter, you know. helps to keep warm," she shares, an attempt at loosening the tension. her slippers click against the floor as she nears with the pot in her hands. the burning red hue of the soup and the assortment of vegetables reminds him of a meal from home.

the silence is less tense when they eat. they take turns as they pick up their own portions, her bites mirroring his. she chuckles at the pink spreading across his face from the heat, a mindless comment about his spice tolerance spilling from her lips naturally, and he can't find it in himself to argue with her. kenma's voice rings out in the background, and neither of them pay any mind to it.

a thought lingers in the air — whether or not he'd be in her house if it weren't for that accidental call. they don't want to dwell on it. good food is a good enough distraction.

"do you do anything outside of work?" the question disrupts the silence. he tears his eyes away from the meal and looks to her.

"volleyball. i play volleyball most of the time."

at that, she releases a hum and a nod, and he can't tell what it means. "yachi told me about that," she begins, her statement cut off by her own slurps. "why not go pro?"

he pauses. it's a simple question, but any semblance of an answer falls flat on his tongue.

it takes a moment before he responds. "i want to focus on myself first."

she can hear the bitterness behind it.

it's quiet again. they each take their last bites and the pot sits on the table completely empty, drained of all that it once had. together, they stack the collection of dishes up into a neat pile before she takes them to the sink, the water turning on and serving as white noise. porcelain clinks against metal in random bouts, and the warmth of the meal settles into sleepiness.

"what about you?" kageyama inquires, both an attempt to avoid silence and to keep himself awake.

"i don't have anything else to do outside of work."

her answer is instantaneous, a stark contrast to his, but similarly, it bears a hint of discontent. she bites the skin of her lower lip to redirect herself. "not that i really need anything else. or want anything else, for that matter. at least right now."

there's more to it. they both know that. but he glances at the clock hung atop one of the many lamps and realizes it's far too late to stay any longer. she jokes about how she couldn't care less, and it's natural. it flows.

the door closes behind him. she stands in the center of the living room with something heavy in her chest.

ᡣ𐭩 a lot of this smau is going to be convos between the frolickers gc bc i love them sm and they make everything feel natural

ᡣ𐭩 yams and yachi had the worst shift of their LIFE. an old lady came in and ordered the most complicated drink and when they couldnt get it down she started cursing them out </333

ᡣ𐭩 kageyama has a bad (?) habit of observing yn all the time. i hope it doesnt come off as stalker-ish i just think he’s a very analytical / people-watching person 😭

ᡣ𐭩 yn made shin ramen 😄😄

ᡣ𐭩 kags has an okay spice tolerance. he won’t throw up and die from spice but he will get super red and sweaty

ᡣ𐭩 i actually have no idea if i said this before but since new grounds and the convenience store are on the same street, yn and yachi tend to meet up during their breaks to talk and hang out !! they love gossiping about anything and everything hence why yn knew about kageyama’s vb stuff

ᡣ𐭩 similar to yn with kuroo and kenma, the frolickers gc is kag’s support system. he tries not to doubt their concern. he’s also just very avoidant so they try not to pry too much 😭😭

ᡣ𐭩 i hope this chapter was cutesy and nostalgic and warm and everything else that reminds you of home !! thats the vibe i was going for ^_^

taglist: @causenessus @strawberryuri @iiwaijime @savemebrazilhinata @tiramizuloz @conrad4life13 @wyrcan @zazathezaer @nperoconelcositoarriba @cupidsblonde @winniethepooh-lover

[glamourscat]

RECONNECTING | SUGAWARA X READER

time skip! | sugawara being... sugawara? | fate always has a plan even if it means waiting a few years to reach it

It’s strange, really, how life can change so quickly, so unexpectedly.

Sugawara Koushi was known for many things. For being kind. For being the mom friend though, in reality, he was more like the fun aunt who sneaks you candy when your mother says no sweets after dinner. He liked to think of himself as emotionally available. And yet, he had one big, striking problem: second guessing himself. Badly.

He prided himself on noticing things. The same way he had been painfully aware that Kageyama was a better setter than him back in high school. And despite being a third-year, despite wanting to play so badly, he had stepped aside for the sake of the team. He told himself he was fine with it, fine with standing on the sidelines, fine with only being subbed in at the last minute. As long as Karasuno won, he was okay.

What he hadn’t realized was how that very mindset had bled into the rest of his life, turning every decision into a relentless game of second guessing.

And that’s where you came in.

You, with your stubbornness. You, with your loud mouth and fleeting thoughts. You, who never let him get away with his twisted way of thinking. You called him out on a daily basis, or almost. And back then, at eighteen, he hadn’t understood it. He had been torn between wanting to cuss you out and just collapsing into your arms. Because how could someone see right through him like that? How could someone understand him so well it was almost terrifying?

But he never acted on it. Every day, he looked in the mirror and convinced himself it was nothing. That you were just in his thoughts too often because you were annoying. Loud. Always in his face. Always challenging him. Always—

But that wasn’t the truth. It never was.

The truth was that Sugawara had been deeply and utterly in love with you. With every irritating habit, every flaw you tried to pretend didn’t bother you but he saw through it anyway. He had been in love with the way your hair moved in the wind, the way your eyes lit up when you laughed, the way you always tried (and failed) to suppress your laughter, only for it to burst out louder than anyone else's in the room.

Or maybe, it was simply the way you looked that day in early January, at the shrine.

Cheeks rosy from the cold, bundled up in a coat so puffy you practically rolled instead of walked, with a scarf big enough for three people. Maybe it was the way you looked at him, maybe it was the realization that in less than three months, you’d both be graduating and he wouldn’t see you every day anymore. His heart had felt heavy in his throat.

It had been the first time you two hadn’t fought. No arguing, no bickering, just laughter. And yet, even then, he had been too much of a coward to say anything.

"You’re staring at me." Your voice pulls Sugawara out of his daze. He blinks, realizing he’s been watching you fidget with your scarf, adjusting it every two seconds like it’ll somehow keep the cold out better.

"No, I’m not."

"Yes, you are," you counter, narrowing your eyes. "Do I have something on my face?"

Sugawara exhales, his breath visible in the winter air. "Yeah. A giant bug actually. It’s kinda distracting."

You gasp, smacking his arm. "Rude! I don’t… right? Please don’t tell me i actually have something" you say, while swatting your face with your hands just in case.

He laughs, too easily, too fondly. 

You grumble something under your breath but don’t argue further. Instead, you focus on the shrine, your eyes flickering between the colorful omikuji papers tied to the stands.

"You gonna draw a fortune?" Sugawara asks after a beat.

You glance at him, then back at the small wooden box filled with paper fortunes. "Dunno. What if it says my luck is horrible?"

"Then I’ll steal it and replace it with a good one."

"That’s cheating."

"No, that’s strategic optimism," he grins.

Your laughter is softer this time. Warmer. "Alright, fine. But if it says I have bad luck, I’m blaming you forever."

You reach in, pull out a slip of paper, and read it. Sugawara watches as your expression shifts. For a moment, he swears he sees a flicker of something, hesitation? Hope? Then, you shove the paper into your pocket and huff.

"Well? What does it say?" he prompts.

"Not telling."

"Why?"

"Because," you say simply, "if I do, you’ll probably start second guessing things again."

And just like that, something tightens in his chest.

He wants to ask. He wants to press. But instead, he just watches as you turn away, eyes still locked on the omikuji papers board fluttering in the cold wind.

✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦ . 　⁺ 　 . ✦

And now he finds himself in an interesting position. It’s been a few years and at the moment he was torn between a) drinking his melancholy away b) dive into the nearest bush and make his exit c) pretend everything is fine while internally screaming for the choices he has made at 18 and that are coming back now at 23 to bite his ass d) all of the above in that order 

Because when Tanaka had said, “Hey man, you have to come to my wedding. No ifs, no buts. And you’re going to be my best man,” Sugawara had certainly not expected to be paired up with you.

And it was embarrassing, he was twenty three years old, yet he still struggled to look you in the eyes. Because you were even more stunning now. Because your light had only grown brighter. Because, despite the years that had passed, that same feeling still lurked deep inside of him.

And for a moment, he was eighteen again.

He didn’t know if Kiyoko and Tanaka had paired the two of you as best man and maid of honor on purpose or if it was a complete accident. All he knew was that, now more than ever, he wanted to make up for lost time.

His thoughts though, were interrupted by you. Which after a moment of silence, awkward glances your voice fills the silent space between the two of you.

"You know, my omikuji back then was right." 

He looks at you perplexed. There’s no way after years of not seeing each other, the closest contact being likes on instagram pictures and occasionals birthday wishes, you brought up as your first thing the same exact thing he had been thinking just now. 

"About what?" he asks, his eyes curious, with a hint of something he hadn’t had in years. 

"That fate is patient."

🔮 "大吉  = great fortune. An important connection is slipping away. If left unspoken, regret will follow. However, fate is patient. Paths that are meant to cross will find their way back to each other."

© GLAMOURSCAT (all rights reserved. do not share, modify, translate and re-upload my work outside of tumblr)

[poofiellie]

Yes, Hinata recrowned Kageyama, set him free of his traumas, and stirred the monster awake so Kageyama could feel free on court (being strong... is satisfying). Hinata's is important to him just as much as Kageyama is to Hinata.

Kageyama gets Hinata and literally doesn't ALLOW shouyou to entertain any "what if" scenarios. The telepathy is so wack that he knows when Hinata's derailing, doubting, and second-guessing. And before hinata bitch and moans about any of this (how it sounds uncool, or his height, or anything dumb), you have kageyama speaking out those thoughts in his head and refute them before they become something tangible.

Kageyama's there every second Hinata flatters so that he can remind him that it doesn't end here. And it won't. So it's entirely Hinata's choice to stop or keep chasing. And Hinata will not lose to that kind of provocation.

It's a reminder: you have talent that people want and still can't get (that mindset IS NOT a joke), don't you dare forget it. What you don't have, you don't. But it's not a weakness.

Kageyama Tobio has almost everything, but he is still jealous of Hinata's agility. He saw use, potential, and power that Hinata himself couldn't see, and until Hinata fulfills his promise, Kageyama will be there to destroy anything that can sidetrack him and stand at the apex that Hinata wants to reach.

[animeyanderelover]

Tw: Yandere themes, possessive behavior, obsession, delusional mindset, clinginess, isolation, abduction, toxic reader

Tags: @leveyani @nightmaresprophet @iloveeyanderes

S/o is like Makima

Hinata Shoyo

☀️​The human brain tends to find unique ways to prevent someone from falling into utter despair and this is exactly what happens when the daunting truth threatens to burst Shoyo's happy bubble. There has never been anything wrong with his relationship as far as he could tell. You were always kind and caring and never made him feel self-conscious about his height, even encouraging and defending him when he felt bad about it or when others made fun of him for it. Your behavior only ever fueled his delusion that the both of you are a perfect match, there were never any indications in his eyes that you were manipulating and using him. So why do others try to shatter his happiness now all of a sudden? Hinata is in violent denial, refuses to even listen to to the words of the people who truly care about him even if they are his own friends. His mind drowns out all words and sounds and in the worst cases he reacts hostile, accusing them of just being jealous that you two are together. You two love each other! You love him! Tell it to them. Say it to him as well so that he may brush of their words in live happily in the present, wrapped up in your lies and own delusions until you decide to bring his world zo a stop.

Kageyama Tobio

🌧️​Initially Tobio's reaction is not too dissimilar to Shoyo's. Only that Kageyama never stays in the stage of denial until there is no way out. He may lash out on the people who warn him, may accuse them that they are just envious and spiteful yet their words stick with him like leeches, slowly sucking away at his view of the world. He may reassure you that their words are nothing that could drag him down yet there is a growing sense of paranoia that he feels in the pit of his stomach, a slimy worm that wriggles around and puts him constantly on edge. Kageyama doesn't want to believe their words yet the sparks have already been lit inside of him, the inferno just waiting to happen. He clings to you much more of a sudden, his jealousy at an all-time high as he can't help but observe you closely, gauging your every gesture and reaction. He leans into every touch of yours yet gets a cold shiver when your skin initially brushes against his, a sensation of dread seeping into his skin together with the comfort your touches always bring him. He constantly asks of you to tell him that you love him and always wants to be with you, his paranoia unquenchable. It's only a matter of time until he will explode.

Kozume Kenma

🐱​It has taken quite a bit of effort out of the introverted boy to work up the courage to confess to you, stepping out of his own comfort zone whilst doing so. It all worked out though. So imagine how Kenma feels when he is told that all of the silent pinning and yearning was essentially for nothing as he still doesn't have what he desires from you the most. Your love. Obviously he turns away from the conversation, deletes the messages and ignores the phone calls from people who are trying to warn him. At least until he has calmed down and decides to at least listen once. Those warnings stick with him from that day on and it affects how he starts acting around you. Golden eyes follow you with a sharper gaze as if trying to detect any flaws within your facade and you take notice of the way he subtly tries to question you when the both of you talk to each other. There is nothing that would hint at you merely using him yet he can't let go either as those words have rubbed him in the wrong way. He needs to be 100% sure, starts stalking your social media accounts as well as reverting back to his old habits of following you around again. If it turns out to be true, he wants at least some leverage against you.

Gyutaro

🟢​Gyutaro has always struggled to accept your words and touches even if a part of him desperately craved for your act to be true. His bitter personality and lingering memories of his human life have taught him though that no one could truly love someone who looks as hideous as he does. Your kind words feel like needles puncturing his ear drums and your touches scorch him, feeling as if rays of sunshine dance across his pale and sickly skin. Something about your gentleness repulses him, your calm personality even whilst he is screaming at you whilst his nails are digging into your flesh confusing and agitating him. He shouldn't be shocked when the truth eventually comes out. He knows how your kind works, he knows that you could have never loved him truly yet the pain of unrequited love still hurts him greatly, fueling his anger. A part of him yearns to rip the organ out that you call heart yet he is unable to do so. Not only because his feelings for you hold him back but also because it is then that he truly learns just how frightening your gentle personality is as well as your lack of fear even whilst he's choking you. In a way you are also a monster, only that you kill him in a different kind of way.

Itadori Yuji

🩷​Feelings truly can blind someone and the same counts for Yuji when the both of you intially meet and hang out together. Gojo has jokingly warned him, Megumi has done so much more bluntly and even Nobara has told him that you creep her out yet Yuji, firmly believing in the quote that one shouldn't judge a book by its cover approaches you, gets to know you and falls in love with you. He doesn't understnad why people are so frightened and wary of you. All of that changes as time passes though and the innocence of Yuji is brutally stripped away. Corruption, greed and violence are subjects he finds himself confronted with and it forces him to develop a new sense of maturity as his blissful simplicity is unable to exist with everything he finds himself surrounded with. Only then does he finally see what his younger and more naive self was either unable to see or just decided to ignore. You're manipulative and continue to do so even when he confronts you about your lies yet he is no longer deceived by your kind words. He notices the indifferent look in your eyes when he breaks down in front of you even whilst you soothe him, realising that you have already won. He's chained to you.

Kamo Choso

🩸​From all the sorcerers that he met after he chose to fight on Yuji's side you are the first one he has gotten close with as you approached him from the very beginning. In his eyes you are kind, gentle and patient as you teach him about social norms and the world around him as Choso has only been recently born into a new body, meaning that there is a huge gap of knowledge and this dedication of yours is one of the many things that leads him to fall in love with you. The rumors start flying around as some sorcerers joke that you have gotten yourself a new toy but Choso believes none of them. How could they even dare? You are kind and gentle, always willing to help. Especially when others make such jokes within your earshot does Choso get hostile and defensive, threatening others to take those rude words about you back whilst you watch him with intrigue. By now he is following you around everywhere you go, insisting that he needs to protect you and that he could never bear if something were to happen to you and he wouldn't be there for you. It is likely that deep down part of him fears that their words may be true which is one of the reasons why he is so needy and soon abducts you.

Fujioka Haruhi

👑​There has always been a part of Haruhi that has had a feeling that your every word and gesture isn't quite as sincere as others think they are. She is surrounded by people who put on an act to appeal to the customers of their club and she has a distinct feeling that you are putting on an act as well, though Haruhi doesn't know what your motives might be. As someone who has never believed in the concept of buttering up her words nicely for others she is very blunt to tell you that she has a bad feeling about you, much to the shock of the people around her as you are well-known and quite liked as well. You do not seem to take it personally though, the calm expression on your face never fading away. Haruhi doesn't even notice her own feelings developing into something else for you and perhaps that is her downfall as you very much notice what she has yet to see and use that to your advantage to coax her closer to your side. By the time Haruhi finally recognises what has happened and what you have done to her it is already far too late to recover and for the first time in her life her usually unflappable attitude is shaken. What have you done to her?

Chae Yul

💜​Chae Yul on his own is already a very toxic person yet with someone who is even more deceiving and manipulative than he is this relationship is about to be lethal. Even whilst Chae Yul is under the illusion that you are in love with him he continues with his manipulative behavior, faking tears to gain affection and sympathy whilst remaining extremely jealous of other people you choose to surround yourself with. Between the two of you only one is aware of the manipulation of the other one though and that is you yet it is fairly easy for you to coax Chae Yul to simply do what you wish of him to do as long as you coddle him afterwards and give him what he craves. When the truth comes to reveal itself though the first emotion that Chae Yul experiences is neither betrayal nor is it aggression. It is fear. Fear to be abandoned and left behind by you. The only one getting messed up is ultimately him, far too addicted to you to ever think about leaving you and living without you. So instead he abducts you, begs of you to stay with him, promising with teary eyes that he'll be useful to you and will be your slave as long as you act as you have always done with him, even if none of it was ever genuine.

[guppybibi]

karasuno first-years with idol!reader for @twiishaa !!

✧┊ft. Shoyo, Kageyama, Tsukishima, Yamaguchi

❁ཻུ۪۪♡

❥ Hinata shoyo

Even way before dating you, he already had somewhat of an idea of what idols were, some terms and all of that. Mainly because Natsu kept playing and dancing along to the beat of random pop idol groups during her free time, who could blame her?

He didn't get all of the hype around them though, like c’mon–watching sports is just so much cooler!

Bros mindset literally changed when he was scrolling through his feed and saw your fancam, was literally shook.

If you told the past him that he was dating you, he'd just start flying away like a stray plastic bag.

Tries to be present to each and everyone of your concerts, if he isn't, he’s probably in an important match. He’d never miss the chance to see you sing your heart out for no absolute reason, that was absurd!

When he does attend your concerts, you can bet a horse that he’ll be the loudest person there. Someone brought a megaphone? He's louder than it, what, like he’ll let a mere megaphone beat him?

Fully dressed for the occasion, light sticks are in the air as he waved them. He feels so proud of you right now! (He isn't really happy about all the fanboys though..)

❥ Tobio Kageyama

Never really understood or got the hype about it, his sister stanned all sorts of groups. He first saw you on one of her posters, still all new to this ‘idol’ thing. He never really thought anything about it, you just caught his eye. Simple as that, you were basically a celebrity. It's not like he was..going to meet you or anything right?

But fate had to do something about it and let you two meet! Sometimes, he’s still in shock to be honest. He often forgets his girlfriend is a well known idol, so when the two of you get chased down on your supposed date you two are like..”Why are they chasing us?!” “I’m not wearing my sunglasses and hat!” “What?! Are you like a wanted criminal or something?” You hit the back of his head lightly for being such a dumbass.

Because of this happening too often, you two often just have indoor dates like movie nights or cuddle seshs! Your relationship is pretty lowkey and private too, you may be an idol but everyone has their own lives.

Tobio may not cheer as loudly and boldly compared to the other people at your concert, but your heart knows that he's your #1 supporter.

❥ Yamaguchi Tadashi

Secretly is the biggest fan of your group, only Tsukki knew about it and it should stay that way. He didn't want to risk getting bullied yet again..

But if you told him that he'd end up dating you, his literal bias, he’d combust on the spot.

He probably doesn't remember how it even happened, just internally so happy about it. Like he's basically your biggest fan!

Literally attends every single concert you have, doesn't care if he's busy or whatnot. It's basically a win-win situation for the both of you so why skip on it?

May not cheer as loudly compared to the other people there but that didn't matter, you knew he was admiring you. Too stunned to speak as he watches you perform.

The only thing he's bothered about is the paparazzi..yeah, that was self explanatory. No one likes the paparazzi, not when they keep disturbing your daily life.

❥ Tsukishima Kei

Doesn't care about these idol pop groups or whatever, he knows you exist but then again, you're just a regular girl who happens to perform for other people.

Little did he know he’d end up with you, an idol from a pretty famous group. If you told him that he'll just scoff and walk away without a care in the world.

Doesn't admit that he goes to every single one of your concerts, but you do know he's ‘secretly’ hiding in one of the crowds. Watching you intently to make sure you're safe and enjoying yourself.

Like everyone else, DESPISES the paparazzi. Got so pissed one time because they disturbed his ‘romantic’ date with you that he flipped them off, which left you cackling as you tried to find a place more private.

[cosmickoshi]

Okay so I'm supposed to be studying for finals but I can't stop thinking about the way Tsukishima's backstory is interpreted by the fandom so naturally I need to rant about it. I'm not even the biggest Tsukishima fan out there, but I swear this claim that he was "overreacting" in a situation where his feelings were completely justified frustrates me to no end. And the thing is... it wasn't even about the lie itself. It was about why Akiteru felt the need to lie to Kei in the first place. (For the sake of this post, I'll be referring to the Tsukishima brothers by their given names.)

"So lame" was the first thing Kei said after spotting Akiteru in the stands (and, subsequently, when it dawned on him that his brother has been lying to him this entire time), but as Yamaguchi acknowledges, it wasn't Akiteru or the lie itself Kei saw as "lame" — it was the notion of allowing yourself to get so invested in something. Kei saw how passionate Akiteru was about volleyball and how much he poured his heart and his soul into it, and yet that passion wasn't enough to land him a spot on the team's starting lineup, let alone to be its ace. In Kei's mind, what's the point of fully immersing yourself in something if it's only going to lead to disappointment later on?

From Kei's perspective, Akiteru investing himself in volleyball only led to disappointment. To feeling the need to lie to his younger brother — the boy who idolised him so much — to not extend that disappointment to him.

The fandom's refusal to take Kei's backstory seriously due to their insistence that he was "being dramatic" when "his backstory isn't traumatising" makes me seethe. We as a society have grown so accustomed to characters having these incredibly tragic backstories (especially in the shōnen genre), but the notion of a backstory isn't inherently tragic — they're supposed to contextualise a character's actions; providing insight into why they are the way they are presently, into what exactly has shaped their motivations and beliefs.

Yes, backstories can be tragic, but that's not always going to be the case — however, that doesn't make them any less valid or important to the character's journey. Just because Kei's backstory isn't Kageyama's or Tendō's doesn't mean that it didn't deeply affect him or that it shouldn't be taken seriously (by both the narrative itself and the audience). His mindset and attitude were still heavily influenced by his past, and you can't gush about how well-written his arc is without acknowledging the role his backstory played in it.

[aosawako]

Answer

“Feelings that come back

Are feelings that never left.”

Tobio Kageyama

Tobio Kageyama asked you to be his girlfriend in your 3rd year of middle school. It was the most he’d ever let someone in. At the time, he was completely focused on volleyball and unable to let you completely in.

That didn’t mean you didn’t try. You managed to make him more comfortable with you, but you couldn’t change his mindset.

It was sweet at times, other times not so much. You understood him in a way no one else did. Understood why he never depended on anyone and chose to do it himself instead. Though, his independence in volleyball appeared in your relationship with him. Tobio insisted on not telling you anything, not communicating because he believed he didn’t need to.

He believed he could do it himself, forever and always. It started frustrating you, though you never admitted it. Instead, you tried to lightly encourage him to depend on you. At least a little. But he didn’t.

There was only so much a person could take before it became too much. Kageyama would push you away and then it would repeat. All it took was a bad game, someone else acting up, a slight mistake in his game.

Tobio would try, he really did. Though he couldn’t change because of the people around him. They just kept disappointing him over and over. Which lead to him being frustrated around you, shutting you out in the process.

That led to what happened a year ago. You told him how you felt, and he couldn’t answer you. Tobio just stared at you, he wanted to say something but he didn’t know what.

He wasn’t like you, comforting and good with words. You knew what to say to him, how to ease him even at the worst moments. He wasn’t anything like you, he couldn’t give you anything more than an, “Okay.”

It was nearing the end of the school year, a few months before summer. You had told him you wanted him to feel like he could open up with you. That you understood why he didn’t but it tired you how he wouldn’t attempt to communicate, just shut you out.

“I really do like you , Tobio.” You had sighed softly, preparing yourself. “And I’ll be rooting for you, in every way imaginable. Maybe right now isn’t the time for us, and maybe we’ll have a better chance in the future.”

Tobio Kageyama thought about that moment often. More frequently than he liked to admit. He saw you around at Karasuno, staring as you passed.

He thought about what you meant, a better chance in the future? Was his time up yet, or could he still make it?

Kageyama had changed, his team taught him more than he thought they would. He could depend on them, he wasn’t alone on the court anymore. The team irritated him but it was different this time. More for stupid reasons over anything.

Now, all he was missing was…you. He thought he lost feelings for you, but all he did was gain them back. He had grown, and you weren't there. You didn't see the fact he had changed. Tobio wasn't going to avoid communication with you, nor try not to depend on you.

So did you mean it? Would there be a chance to make it right this time?

Sugawara was the first person he asked. Kôshi supported the idea, only if Tobio was ready to be the person for you. He saw the progress and growth in him over the school year.

Then Kageyama asked Hinata before sending the message. If he really should do it, if you would even respond.

Hinata was excited for his friend, saying that if you said you really did like him, you would love him now. He encouraged him to send the message because even if it did go wrong, it's better to fail knowing you tried rather than fail not knowing if it could've worked.

You were walking home from school, chewing at your gum, headphones blasting. The music was cut off by a message being read.

‘From Tobio: I miss you.’

Then your music started up again, and you let it. Not checking your phone once as you walked, millions of thoughts running in your mind.

As soon as you got home you opened it, you saw exactly what you heard. You pondered for a moment, what to say. You had noticed his changes, they were subtle. But he had grown more from who he was.

He was in practice when you had responded. So as soon as it was over, he checked his phone. Relief filled him when he saw your name, a simple message followed but it was exactly what he needed. You reciprocated, you missed him too.

(Click photo if blurry)

His message surprised you to say the least. He was almost outside? The two of you didn't live necessarily far from each other, however it would take some time to get to your house. Was he already heading there before he sent you that?

That didn’t really matter at the moment. You quickly got yourself ready, whatever that meant. After a few minutes, you grabbed a pair of shoes. Putting them on before stepping out.

It was already dark out, but you could still spot him. He was standing in front of your house near the sidewalk. The door clicked close after you pushed it into place.

Kageyama looked back to see you, taking his hands out of his pockets. Rubbing them on his sides, was he nervous?

You approached him, walking down to the street. You were going to say something first but he beat you to it.

The top of his head was visible when he gave you a short bow, “Thank you for coming.”

“Well, I just came out of my house. I should thank you. You ran all this way didn’t you?”

Tobio stared at you, lips parting. “I did but it was nothing.” His head perked when he heard you laugh at him, he missed that.

“Thank you..Tobio. I can still call you that right?” He nodded. It was still new to him, but it was welcomed. His eyes stayed on you, he hadn’t been able to get a good look at you in a while.

“What I told you, I meant it. I do miss you and want to get back together.” Kageyama stumbled on his last words, but you could still see he was attempting to be better for you. “I promise you’ll be a priority and I’ll do my best to communicate. I won’t let you down.”

You smiled, he was so serious about it. He only really ever said something if he meant it. The silence sat for a moment, “Then..I trust you keep your promise. You’ve never let me down before so there really isn’t a need to say-“

Kageyama didn’t mean to cut you off but he couldn't wait. “Will you be my girlfriend?” He stared at you like you created volleyball itself. His ears were pink, followed by his face dusted with blush.

“Yes, I will.” You didn’t hesitate when you said it. Tobio really liked that, more than he would want to admit. You saw him bolt to the corner of the street, you were about to follow. Then he ran back, gently pushing flowers into your hands.

“I hope you like them, thank you again.” He watched you touch the flowers. His hands shoved back into his pockets, they were so sweaty. He didn't want you to see that.

“Thank you Tobio. That’s so sweet, you really didn't have to. Did you keep them over there in case I said no?” He looked away from you sheepishly.

“Maybe.” He looked back feeling your arms wrap around him. His face was so red, he was happy he didn't have any of his teammates around. Especially now that he was hugging you back, yeah. It was better that they weren't there.

Bonus ౨ৎ

Kageyama laid in bed, just about to fall asleep. His phone flashed back on, making him grab it begrudgingly. It was Sugawara.

Practice does pay off.

[romaevelizz]

Hope your still mine ˖ ࣪⊹

Various! x Fem!reader

Inspired by Pretty little birds by Sza

˖ ࣪⊹ he sat In front of his desk doing his assignment his focus on them as you watched from the other side. It was weird the feeling that you’ll both be graduating soon. That you won’t see each other every day because of school, the sickening feeling of being accepted into different universities. Having to possibly work long-distance relationships.

The nightmare of breaking up because of that, living far away and not being able to work a relationship, the fights, the stress. That you wouldn’t be with him for the rest of your life that all of the talk of having a future might have just been talk… “I can feel you staring..”

You didn’t say anything just watched him you could feel your self starting to cry. All of it being so overwhelming, that maybe just maybe he won’t be yours anymore, that all of the memories and moments you’ve created and shared we to be forgotten. That he’d give up on you, that your ‘difficult’ nature would get rid of him even after all this time. That he’d get tired of you.

His eyes finally left if paper meeting your teary eyes, his brows frowning “love what’s wrong?” He asked his hand coming to cup your face whipping away stray tears that slipped down your face. “Common talk to be baby..”

“Please don’t give up on me..” you sobbed, “please..” his eyes filled with concern and he moved you close to him. “My love what makes you think that I’d give up on you, ever.” He asked his attention fully in you now.

You could only shake your head, nothing really just these intrusive thoughts that haunted you because you did want to be with anyone that he was the person you could only see yourself with ever. “I don’t know..” you muttered a frown plastered on your wet face.

“Hey, hey listen to me, just because we’re graduating doesn’t mean I’m gonna leave you. I dosent mean that if we go to different universities I’m not ever gonna take a train to come see you even if I’m traveling across the country. That I won’t call you every chance I get, hell I’d transfer schools if needed no matter how hard it is. No matter how angry we get at eachother I’d be right by your side once again. Because every day I wake up, every time I go to sleep I hope in the morning you’ll still be mine.” He spoke in full sincerity.

God his heart broke that you thought he’d ever give up on you because he may not be as open and giving to others but lord with you. With you it’s different his mindset is heart is so open, and he doesn’t want that with anyone else how could he? When you were right in front of him.

You were perfection no matter what. He pulled you ups to his lap your arms wrapping around his neck and his lips kissed your neck and shoulders softly. “I don’t want anyone but you.”

“I am yours, as you are mine. I plan on growing old with you I’m in it for the long run alright? Because I wanna be with you..” You nodded “I wanna be with you to..” you muttered lips meeting his the kiss filled with such love.

“I’ll find you no matter what.”

Tetesuro Kuroo, KENJI AKAASHI, WAKATOSHI USHIJUMA, Kiyoomi Sakusa, DAICHI SAWAMURA, Asahi Azumane, Toru Oikawa, HAJIME IWAIZUMI, Tobio Kageyama, KEI TSUKISHIMA, Takanobu Aone, Satori Tendo, + ur Fav!

[seumyo]

hi! How would you characterize Sakusa? And do you have any fic recommendations where you think he’s very in character?

I’VE BEEN WAITING FOR THIS ONE !! PLEASE, BUCKLE UP 💺 BECAUSE I’M GOING TO YAP (in 12 paragraphs or more, I think)

PLEASE DO NOTE THAT THIS IS JUST FOR ENTERTAINMENT PURPOSES, I’m not mad or trying to be all wise and condescending with how people interpret his character, huhu. People can interpret characters to their own judgement, and these are just my thoughts <33

I just realized nonnie just asked how I (ME) would characterize Sakusa and NOT a Sakusa analysis, uhm. Let me just take a hiatus rq—I’M EMBARRASSED

Let’s start with the beginning (and no, this doesn’t have a chronological order; I just yap and yap) !!

Sakusa is one of the most misunderstood characters in Haikyuu, mostly because people tend to reduce him to a simple “germaphobe” and a “mean, blunt jerk.” But that’s honestly such a bit of a shallow take on a character who’s way more nuanced than that !!

Let me explain 🤓☝️

NOTE. WORDS MAY REPEAT AND LIKE, I JUST YAP SO IT GOES IN CIRCLES 💥 if it doesn’t make any sense, it’s bcs it’s just yap and no brain cells applied 🙀

^ Canonically, we know that Sakusa was a quiet child, not very social. He didn’t make friends easily, and with a family that was often too busy for him, he was mostly on his own. It was Komori, his cousin, who introduced him to volleyball, and even then Sakusa didn’t immediately love it.

He just needed something to do.

But slowly, he found something meaningful in it—a sense of control, perhaps, or a challenge that suited his methodical nature. He started practicing alone, pushing himself, and that’s such a key part of who he is. Sakusa doesn’t rely on external motivation—he’s self-driven. That’s rare.

He’s also very independent.

What really gets me about Sakusa is how high his standards are—for himself, most of all. After losing to Ushijima, he didn’t sulk or lash out. He drilled his receiving technique until it was no longer a weakness.

He sets goals with ridiculous precision and won’t stop until he’s met them. That kind of relentless improvement isn’t born out of ego—it’s born out of pride. Pride in doing things right. Pride in being the kind of player who doesn’t settle. And yes, maybe that makes him intense. Maybe it makes him hard to approach. But it also makes him someone who doesn’t break under pressure, who doesn’t shy away from challenges, and who quietly holds himself—and everyone around him—to a higher standard.

He wants to finish things until they’re polished and there is no more room for errors.

+ There’s also this layer of competitiveness and self-awareness that a lot of people miss. Sakusa doesn’t gloat. He doesn’t react much even after scoring a match point. But put a strong rival in front of him, and it’s like watching a storm roll in. He focuses, studies them like a puzzle, and works until he can dismantle their strengths piece by piece.

When Kageyama said he seemed “average”? Sakusa didn’t get angry because of insecurity—he got irritated because he knew better. He knew what he was capable of, and being underestimated wasn’t something he tolerated, not because he needed praise, but because it was factually incorrect.

That’s such a realistic and mature reaction, honestly. He’s not prideful for the sake of ego. He’s just confident in his analysis—another sign of his realist mindset. Like, imagine if someone said you were just “okay” in something you excel in—you would be angered too, no?

Komori and Washio have both pointed out his bluntness, which people often confuse for rudeness. But it’s not that Sakusa doesn’t care about people—he just values honesty more than pleasantries. His sense of humor exists (surprise, he’s funny I wanna k*ss him so badly), but it’s dry and subtle, more likely to show up during a deadpan tease than a laugh-out-loud moment. FREE MY MAN FROM THE TOO SERIOUS ALLEGATIONS

And the thing is, his quietness isn’t arrogance. It’s just... focus. He observes. He analyzes. He doesn’t speak unless there’s something worth saying. And in a world obsessed with noise, that can look like superiority when it’s actually just self-possession (the state or feeling of being calm, confident, and in control of one's feelings; composure).

People love to shorthand it as “germophobia,” but that misses what he actually feels—he’s just blunt about the things he dislikes (which is getting dirt on him or possibly getting sick). Sakusa’s fear of germs isn’t irrational or obsessive in the way the label implies. It’s rooted in control—specifically, his desire not to compromise his physical condition.

He’s hypermobile, meaning his joints move beyond the normal range. That kind of body demands meticulous care, because one wrong move or a simple cold or injury can set him back.

A research conducted by Nathan et. al. (2018) concluded that “Hypermobility is relatively common among individuals, and there is a lot of anecdotal evidence associating it with increased rates of injuries. This project finds that NH individuals are more likely to sustain a ligament or joint sprain in sports. This is due to increased joint laxity and flexibility preventing injury.” The limitations of this research are “assessing for particular hypermobility and focusing on one sport to investigate its association with sports injury in those who are hypermobile or not + focusing on one specific joint, assessing its flexibility and association with injury.”

So yeah, he avoids crowds. He wears a mask. He probably wipes down his water bottle like it’s a sacred artifact (maybe !! I do too because I don’t wanna get sick in this scorching summer heat in the archipelago I live in). But this isn’t just paranoia—it’s discipline. It’s the same discipline that drives him to spike a ball 378 times just to get better or to keep setting until his hands blister because he’s not satisfied with “good enough.”

He doesn’t just wear a mask because he’s scared of germs for no reason—his caution is tied to his identity as a perfectionist and realist.

Sakusa is hyperaware.

He’s constantly calculating risks—on and off the court. He isn’t trying to be dramatic about hygiene; he’s just cautious. Everything he does is intentional. When you look at how he plays, you realize that he’s methodical, adaptable, and incredibly precise. He doesn’t waste energy or motion—his gameplay is almost pristine. That’s not someone who’s just gifted; that’s someone who demands the best from himself, which probably explains why he’s so cautious about staying healthy and injury-free.

SAKUSA ISN’T A MEANIE BLUNT JERK PLS (okie, maybe a little, but all is forgiven; I can apologize for him #mybebeloves)

++ Sakusa’s not closed off because he doesn’t care—he’s closed off because he does. He’s observant, he listens, and he notices the little things others miss. His standards are high, but he holds himself to them first. That quietness, that distance, it’s a kind of armor (could be a response to what he experienced in childhood—probably neglect OR fear of attachment). But underneath it, there’s someone fiercely devoted to the game, someone who knows the cost of excellence and still chooses to pay it every day.

Sakusa isn’t the type to shout or make a big deal out of things, but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t care. You can tell he respects and values his teammates, even if he’s sarcastic or reserved. He notices small details that other players might overlook, and that says a lot about his thoughtfulness. His kind of loyalty is quiet but strong—he doesn’t need to be loud to lead or connect with people.

I also think his quietness is often mistaken for arrogance.

He’s not trying to act superior; he just genuinely thinks deeply before speaking or acting. That makes him come across as aloof, especially in a sport where a lot of top players are loud or super high-energy. But honestly, I find his presence really grounding. He brings a calm intensity that balances out more explosive personalities like Bokuto (another bebeloves of mine ☹️).

And let’s be real—Sakusa wouldn’t fall for someone he couldn’t trust. If he lets Y/N into his space, into his world, that means everything. It means he’s choosing them, despite every instinct he’s built to protect himself. So no, he wouldn’t be a jerk to them (pls just let my bebeloves love with his whole heart 😪). He might be a little blunt, a little awkward maybe. But he’d be gentle in his own quiet way. The kind of love that’s slow, thoughtful, but undeniably real. LIKE HE’S A BOY LET HIM BE GOOFY, MY SILLY LITTLE CUPCAKE DESERVES JUSTICE 😭 DON’T MAKE HIM A MEANIE I AM BEGGING ON MY KNEES

So yeah, when I write for Sakusa, I make him 20% serious and 80% loverboy 😋🫶

Neway, fic rec time uwu — fics that I think captured his character well☝️💞

when you start dating kiyoomi by @kleftiko

period cramps and a little bit of pining by @omi-boshi

make up for it by @cierai

won’t you get up off, get up off the roof? by @/uaigneach on ao3 - one of my fav sakusa/atsumu fics (but it’s mostly atsumu-centric!)

Better Together by @/ghostystarr on ao3 - aha, another one of my favs on ao3 🫶

[candyskiez]

thinks about teru again. he’s so funny and tragic to me. like. ok so he got targeted by a psychic terrorist organization that sent adults to try and kidnap him at a young age. and he rationalizes it by going “i am the Protagonist this is happening because i am the Main Character” and then lives his life by that idea bc it’s that or face the fact that he’s nothing, that he’s an average person and all these things happened to him for no reason. and then he meets mob and wants to befriend him, has questions he wants to ask- here is someone who might finally understand him. and then bc teru is thinking like a Main Character i think he goes “ok so if i defeat him then we’re friends otherwise we’re rivals” bc he’s still going off of tropes and cliches. and then shigeo fucking curbstomps him and he goes “oh ok i get it im not the main character 👍 KAGEYAMA’s the main character. so i must be The Rival Character then” but it’s just a way he can act as a friend without breaking the tropes he uses to rationalize his trauma

YEAH YOU GET IT! YOU UNDERSTAND! He's so horribly lonely but also literally everything about his mindset is directly standing in the way of giving him any connection. He holds people to such high standards that they're always going to disappoint him, so he spends time with none of them. He craves constant approval and affection but none of it is enough to satisfy the need for actual connection. So he just goes through shallow relationship after shallow relationship going Yep. This is great. I am happy. And I genuinely think he doesn't realize he's NOT happy because like. When you're in a shitty situation for your entire life you don't necessarily realize things can be Better. So Teru is not captured by claw when other people are, and he can do things that other people can't, so his situation is better than most! Nevermind the fact hey maybe there shouldn't be Claw. Maybe people shouldn't be attacking random kids. Maybe this is all insane. He's just like. Wow I'm so strong and smart for evading claw, because the idea that he just was Lucky would be terrifying and take away his entire sense of safety. He needs to be the smartest toughest guy that Has Ever Existed™ because if he's not, then suddenly he could get captured or die at any moment. And that's suddenly way less haha my life is so cool! The denial juice is strong here.

Literally everything about his introduction episodes is so damn telling. He tells the body improvement club everyone always underestimates him. But he conveniently leaves out how this makes him feel, or if he's offended. We see him lose his shit when Mob says he isn't able to hurt him, so clearly he's far more affected by it than he wants to admit. But he can't be upset by it. It's an Advantage in this Battle he's in. No one takes him seriously, and that means he can get away with more shit, and that means it's easier to beat them in battle! Nevermind the fact that he works his ass off, he is not upset at all, because that would be ridiculous. It's an Advantage. He wraps literally everything in his life that hurts him up in a bow of "Actually, this is good." He cannot admit that anything about him or his life is bad. He cannot admit that he isn't perfect, or that his life isn't just a fun challenge, or that he maybe misses his parents a little bit. He like...just fully submerges himself in the idea of being a character so he doesn't have to realize how easily he could die or have his life ruined. If his parents stop sending him money, he's fucked. If claw beats him, he's fucked. He doesn't have actual connections with people, because he views them too lowly to let them in at all, and he is fucking himself over so hard with it. He needs this to not be terrifying. And he also needs to be in the right, I think. I mean, he treats all of the fights at school like a game. It feeds his ego and it means he's safe. People can't touch him and it feels good to take out his anger (he's just angry that they disrespect him, he has nothing else whatsoever to have unresolved anger about, he is completely fine and is just enjoying being able to wipe that smug smile off that assholes face. He is so okay and well adjusted!) He's just. A mess of weird ass coping mechanisms. If he isn't right, which he definitely is!, suddenly he isn't the main character, suddenly he's not just Doing Whatever, suddenly he's just another asshole. Y'know. Do I make sense. He needs to be right because if he's not right it goes from a fun game to he was just an asshole for no reason and he didn't actually gain anything at all.

God. I need to rewatch EP five, because it's insane and also tells you so much about Teru, I'm sure it's even better on a rewatch. I need to rewatch this show soon or I'll die. But like. God. He takes the idea of the only other natural esper his age he's ever met being different than him SO personally. Because he's right. He is doing everything exactly the way he is supposed to. Clearly this guy is an idiot and weak. That's why he's afraid to fight him. Clearly. He can't comprehend that maybe Mob just straight up doesn't want to hurt him. Mob thinks he's better than him. Mob needs to be taken down a peg. And then he can't hurt Mob. Then he can't break his fucking barrier. Hes fought espers before. He knows how to fight espers. He is perfectly capable of it. He has literally everything he needs to beat him and for the first time he very suddenly Can't. And this person is so different and is treating him like he's having a temper tantrum and isn't following his rules that he's formed his entire life around. Can I interest you in autistic Teru. Can I please interest you in the fact Teru has autism. Please ma'am I just want a minute of your time.

I also feel like. The fact he Needed to idolize Mob is very telling. Mob defeated him so CLEARLY he's so powerful and perfect and amazing. He still can't let go of Being Amazing, of the idea he can't fail for no good reason. He needs Mob to be special or else he means nothing. Or else he's worthless. He needs to mean something. His entire identity is hinged around Mob now which. No pressure. He needs Mob to be perfect or else he's worth Nothing. So he puts him on a huge pedestal so he doesn't have to do any reflecting and now he can have the added bonus of a friend and it's Fine! It is totally fine. He is not affected by the fact he almost killed a man on accident. He is not affected by the fact he may have severely injured several people. He is not affected by the fact Mob could've killed him. He is not affected by the fact he was wrong. None of this affects him at all. He is So Fine.

And then he switched the narrative around to haha I was the one who needed to be taken down a peg. This is fine. My world view is not in shambles. I don't need to reassess anything. Everything that happened to me is still cool and fine and I still matter because I'm in the main characters life. So it's fine. He goes from nothing matters except Me to nothing matters except Kageyama, but at first he's done absolutely zero reconfiguring.

Also like. He romanticized that fight so much. Can we please talk about that. God. Hi. This fucking kid. Someone please like. Get him a therapist and maybe a Capri Sun.

I'm too tired to write more right now and think I should probably go ahead and post but like. Yeah. God. This show. Teru makes way too much damn sense. I want to shake him. What is his problem (just spent several paragraphs analyzing his problem.)

[astrowaffles]

As Iwaoi shipper, what do you think is the difference between them and Kuroken (both duo are childhood friends and in fics tags as friends to lovers, right)? What do you think that made Iwaoi more popular than Kuroken? In your opinion if Aoba Johsai vs Nekoma, who will win in a match?

i've had a think about this, and the short answer is: kuroken is too normal.

LET ME EXPLAIN:

both kuroken and iwaoi contain individual characters who are batshit insane. in fact, arguably, the characters of kuroken are more unusual than the characters of iwaoi. however, kuroken's actual dynamic is very usual. they're childhood friends so they know each other pretty well, they have a special attack that they worked hard on, they have a silly yes-no-yes-no dynamic. iwaoi, on the other hand, know each other so well kageyama thinks they read each other's minds, they have no special attack but continue to win, and their yes-no-yes-no takes the form of ridiculous fully-fledged arguments.

haikyuu's top ships are mainly absolute weirdos, like iwaoi, kghn, and bkak. kuroken are just not weird enough, and i never thought i'd say that!

of course there are other factors:

kuroken are not often seen together, especially in comparison to iwaoi. kenma's main role is to be hinata's friend/rival, while kuroo's biggest part was to train tsukki, so kuroken moments are minimal. by contrast, iwaoi go to the bathroom together.

iwaoi's relationship has been fully explored, first introduced very early in the show and ending a loooong time later. meanwhile, kuroken - especially before the movie - get like 1 episode backstory and 1 episode current-relationship to themselves. we aren't really shown the scope of their relationship because they're too busy trying to win nationals.

the fandom loves an argument! have you ever noticed that popular ships in fandoms tend to be ships that act like they hate each other? kuroken are too domestic and therefore not as interesting.

angst potential. kind of like point 3, iwaoi are fulllll of angst potential. you could argue there's equal potential in kuroken, especially as kenma is a year below & therefore separation is inevitable, but iwaoi are just soooo traumatisable, from oikawa's not-really-injury to unhealthy mindset to moving across the world. kuroken are pretty well-adjusted. oikawa and iwaizumi? less so.

as for who would win, i have no idea! my personal bias wants to say aoba johsai, but objectively it all depends on whether oikawa would be able to 'read' nekoma. do you think he could?

thanks for the ask!

[kageyahma]

the timing of kageyama's backstory reveal: need, acceptance, and compassion

kageyama's late backstory reveal not only services the recontextualization of the whole story and reinforcing kageyama's deuteragonist role, but it also holds so much power in haikyuu's themes of growth particularly in that it is revealed during his adulthood.

specifically: why does it hold so much power in its timeskip reveal? let's consider why it wouldn't have hit as hard and as meaningful as it did if it was revealed, say, during nationals

the backstory as a device to communicate TO the audience: we understand kageyama's whole mindset throughout the series through his lens rather than just hinata's. there are little pieces of his past that gain a new layer of meaning: his commitment to self care, his love of curry and being a setter, his desire for someone to Be There for him, to hold hinata to a Better standard.

kageyama as an audience stand-in, encouraging reflection WITH the audience: it's just like growing older and understanding how your youth was shaped as a whole - a reflection on kageyama's part that all these people he dreamed of playing with for years are all here and have been there since high school. it's a prompt helping identify those moments that shaped you and made you who you are. that's the power in being revealed in his adulthood when these things especially tend to become clear.

a complete story is told even without kageyama's backstory, without the backstories of everyone else playing in the adlers msby game. However, the addition of everyone's stories isn't meant to serve as a completeness, but to reflect on how the story and everyone's lives are enriched by seeing other people with them. going through them one by one between each player ties in the thread of connection running through all of haikyuu before its ultimate conclusion.

so let's think back to the specific moments when karasuno is reforming, and after kageyama returns from the youth camp. both are key moments where kageyama struggles to communicate and understand his own reactions, and his team accepts him regardless and helps him through it. never do they press the idea "why are you like this, what's your problem", never do they try to accuse outside of what is happening in the moment, because that's not what's important. karasuno reflects on his experiences at seijoh, they reflect on the environment he was in during the youth camp, and help him through that. they never dismiss him, they approach his behaviour with curiousity and constructvely.

they don't need to know about his grandfather's recent passing to do this. if there's one thing haikyuu knows to express, it's that everyone is going through something and these connections can help process that with direct or indirect support. they don't NEED to know the full story, and neither do we as the audience to sympathize with him. the story never tells us "he's acting out about his role as a setter at kitagawa daiichi because his grandfather passed away". the backstory comes after years of the team and of us knowing and growing with kageyama. the backstory is not treated as some logical solution to a problem at hand, but rather like a bonus layer which serves to enrich the story in ways that go above and beyond.

back to chapter 388 itself: this is just something kageyama is reflecting on in the middle of a game. as it returns to the present we see everyone else in game mode, we see them smiling through kageyama's eyes and we see him smiling back. he's looking back with peace and joy and celebration as we as readers are looking back and celebrating the story as a whole in its final arc.

on a personal standpoint: what i believe it tells us is that people don't NEED to know and understand every nook and cranny of your emotions and history to help you, and neither do you. the current moment and potential can count for everything and growth happens whether you realize it or not. what withholding his backstory tells us is that just as karasuno accepted kageyama as he was, it is a compassionate reminder that people who care about you are very capable of acceptance as you are. the thing about love (in which i strongly include friendship) is that it's an avenue for constant discovery and new understandings both inside and out.

[thelonelysoulhome]

Doumeki is the first person ever that hold out his hand to Yashiro:

(Part 1)

Doumeki is the first person ever to stop yashiro's assault, in their first encounter doumeki stops the guy that is pinning roughly Y down on a desk,

look right in his eyes and ask him a question, THE question that never been asked to him before :

"Are you okay ?"

This question that no one before cared enough to bother ask, a simple question that is so meaningful and important but never been asked to Yashiro before.

No one ever cared enough about Y to just chek if he was alright, he always been abused neglected and used, he's whole life, by everyone he encountered in his existence:

His mom :

The little nine years old yashiro never been asked by his Mom if he was okay, we have no clue to know if she knew or not what was going on with her son, but as a mother not seeing that your own son is being raped by his stepdad is kinda off ( he literaly raped Y just behind her while she was sleeping..)

we know that plays a big part in Y's trauma and fucked up mindset, this disgusting piece of shit that raped him violently used that to brainwash Y to think that he liked feeling pain, to convince a literal child that don't even understand what's going on, that if he felt pain than he would get pregnant and if his mom find out she gonna be mad and abandon him, he was so young and clueless that he didn't even understand that it's imposible, 'cause in the mind of a child, if an adult say something than it have to be true.

How horifying and disturbing to hear that for a child ? How much those words shaped the way of thinking and logic of the current Y ? How much of an impact those fucked up words disturbed his way of thinking and shaped thise thick walls that he lived with for 40 years ?

This panel is one of the most hurtful (and one of my favorite btw) in this masterpiece, it speaks without words, him watching a little kid being sheltered by her mom with an umbrela from the rain speak so loud, the pain, the loneliness is screaming.

Why not me ? Why my mom, the one person that should be protecting me from all the bad of the world, didn't care about me and the abuse I lived ? Why didn't she sheltered me ? Why didn't she protect me ? Why she never asked me if I was okay ?

So heartbreaking (just for doumeki to return to the car with an fuking umbrella...crying right now).

I'm not saying that his mom knew but I'm saying there is always clue from abuse, she negleted him to the point that she didn't even bother enough to notice or maybe even ignored them (the sighs) in purpose.

And after all of that she abandon him like a piece of a trash that Y is already convinced to be at this point, dirty, twisted beyond repair, unloveable, a livestock that no one wants, like he said himself .

A parent or carer’s belief in the child, support and actions to stop the harm after the child’s disclosure have an impact on the child’s resilience and recovery from the sexual abuse. If a child is not believed and supported appropriately after a disclosure it can lead to a higher level of relational trauma for the child leading to significantly more negative health and mental health outcomes for the child in the long-term.

Kageyama Kanji:

Now come kageyama, yashiro's first friend and first Love, when Y met kageyama he's already deep in self destruction by seeking violent sex with violent men (mostly yakuza men that are more violent and homophobic) as a coping mecanism from what he lived from his childhood to his puberty.

(At this point Y didn't see his step dad for 3 years and he stoped the rape surely because Y body changed and grew up, disgusting pedo.. And he didn't see his mom for aroud a year)

With kageyama Y encounter for the first time physical touch without pain but he's to deep to even realize it at this point.

intersting to notice how Y did not seek out violent sex when he though about kage.

At this moment Y try to seek a reaction from kageyama but the only thing that he would have is :

"Okay" okay ? like WTF ! (Y look so disappointed), he's begging for attention here, he's begging for care, for confort, even if he dosen't realise it, he wants someone to care so bad.

But Kage is again an another person that did not care enough to even try to ask him a simple "Are you okay ?" and after this indiference he take his distance from Y (the worst thing to do in this situation) I know kage is just an akward teenager and just a random classmate but for god sake he could have tried a little harder...

Again we can see how Y try so hard to seek a reaction from kage he want him to care so bad, deepdown he wanted someone to notice that he isn't well.

I know Kageyama feel sorry for Y and care for him in a way but never verbalize it he just tell him that he's pitiful and pathetic because he is all alone..(something he continue to think even now) he pity him but he never been bothered enough to really reach out to him.

And that lead to again one of the most hurtful and heartbreaking moment, Y breaks down in tears 'cause he can't hold it anymore (the only time we see him cry with chapter 25 ). No one cares about him, he have no home, no roots, no one to rely on, no one to trust. He is all alone, in both physical an mental distress.

So he seek a sort of "confort" in what he knows : pain, physical one, as a form of self harm but also mental pain relief, to not feel emotions up there (brain) to numb his unbearable existence.

Yashiro learned with Kageyama, by loving someone for the first time, again, the deception, the emptiness and the loneliness, of not being loved.

And the despair of this first person being a man. Those same men that raped him, abused him, used him, crushed him, breaked him. He hates them but he finish by falling for one of them.

See you in part 2

[animeyanderelover]

May I request Chuuya, Dazai, Kageyama, Tendou, Yuuji(jjk), and Urie with an s/o who has social anxiety. Happy new year 🎉

Tags: @naeho @flaming-vulpix @shumidehiro @leveyani

Tw: Yandere themes, unhealthy mindset, unhealthy relationship, possessive behavior, obsession, delusion, protective behavior, clinginess, isolation, manipulation, threats, co-dependence

S/o has social anxiety

Kuki Urie

🖤He knows that it’s very much wrong to feel this way but Urie can’t stop himself from enjoying your social anxiety at times. He’s someone who wants to be useful to you, mainly by protecting you and making you feel safe and that is what ends up happening due to your fear of interacting with others. You tend to stick close to his side since he’s your boyfriend, let him do most of the talking when someone approaches you two and are very skittish when you’re left alone, terrified that someone might try to talk to you since your nervousness shows. This gives him a lot of control and power in the relationship, something that isn’t healthy, yet even if Urie knows that, at times it just gets to his head. The problem is that even if he tries to encourage you to be socially active, you often just run back to him when you’re too scared.

🖤The way you clutch his hand in your own sweaty palm and hide behind him always shatters his rational side telling him to have you adapt a bit better. How couldn’t he when he sees you shaken to your core? Slowly he starts resigning himself to the new role he has to take as your boyfriend and soon he starts liking it. Sure, it’s unhealthy and your borderline co-dependence on him is toxic but you seem so much happier and at ease with the way things are right now. You’re feeling good and protected when he’s with you and that’s all Urie really wants. He reacts slightly aggressive when his own Squad points out that your relationship isn’t really healthy even if a part of him silently agrees with them.

Tobio Kageyama

🌧️Poor boy is a bit overwhelmed with his darling but he really only wants the best for them. Unfortunately his good intentions can come across as very overbearing most of the time. He’s just very protective of you due to your fear to speak with other people and the fact that you come running to him so often since you’re more comfortable around him, Kageyama also ends up getting the wrong idea. He’s not really letting you leave that much without him because what would happen if you’d end up needing his help with something? Worst is that you would rather prefer being with him.

🌧️You feel so much more comfortable when he’s with you since he can just take over the socializing part for you. It becomes such a routine for him that at one point he low-key normalizes it without fully acknowledging that you should require some help. Even if his friends tell him that he should help you with your problem instead of coddling you by doing what you want to avoid, he just can’t deny you the moment you become anxious in public. He’s too protective to see you struggling like this. No, instead he starts turning angry when someone starts making you uncomfortable, even if they had no bad intentions at all.

Satori Tendou

❤️Tendou finds himself stuck in a bit of a moral dilemma when it comes to his darling. On the one hand he also feels a very sick enjoyment by having you rely on him so much but he also understands that your social anxiety is a hindrance since social interaction is unavoidable, no matter how hard you may try. It isn’t really healthy. Obviously he helps you when you struggle which oftentimes just ends with him doing everything in the end as you end up feeling too embarrassed and nervous, hiding behind his tall form. It’s very hard forcing you into something when you’re shaking, have clammy hands and keep on looking at him for reassurance. Honestly, at times he just scares some people away with his creepy looks when they make you very visibly anxious and don’t seem to have plans to leave anytime soon.

❤️Satori is still doing what he can to help somehow since he knows that you yourself are sometimes frustrated because you just can’t hold a normal conversation and ask for help. To not push you into cold water right away though, he starts by having you around Ushijima and the other volleyball players in his team. They’re quite a chaotic bunch so he deems that if you’ve gotten used to them, being around others should be easier. He’s also trying to take you out more, although he never leaves your side once. All his good intentions aside though, sometimes Tendou feels insecure about himself too. When that happens, your clingy behavior and reliance on him is reassuring and he’ll even encourage it to feel better about himself.

Dazai Osamu

🤎I don’t think that you’d be much surprised to find out that Dazai would love this a little bit too much. You’ve just given him the golden ticket to enable him to do what he wants. It isn’t hard to notice that you struggle enormously with social interactions and this gives the man a great idea on how to manipulate you and make you dependent on him. All he has to do is get close to you and then worsen your already anxious condition to have you fully rely on him. As soon as you have opened your heart for him, he starts spreading his poison. Always taking over in public, something you tend to let him do very gladly. After all it spares you all the potential embarrassment and struggles to speak up.

🤎Just like that he coaxes you into letting him handle everything which worsens your social skills and makes you all the more bashful and nervous when he isn’t with you. You find yourself unwilling to leave the house much if Dazai can’t be with you since you’ve grown too accustomed with him being the one in charge. Your avoidance of social events leads you to spend a lot of time with Dazai at home and he mostly doesn’t mind. Sometimes though he craves to see you all anxious and nervous, struggling to speak to strangers and ultimately hiding behind him. It’s adorable~

Nakahara Chuuya

🟠Little, aggressive man here only grows easier irritable with someone like his s/o. Chuuya is a very protective man so he can not bear to see you as scared and nervous as you often are. Technically he knows that the other person mostly isn’t at fault, he’s aware of your social anxiety. He just can’t keep his temper though, especially if you look at him with those frightened and pleading eyes which make his heart burst. Your social anxiety and his easily trigger-happy temper make for a very bad combo in public so Chuuya spends a lot of his time with you inside his house where he knows that you feel far more comfortable.

🟠He feels great seeing you far more happy and comfortable, so much more loving now that you aren’t a nervous mess. A part of him still knows that this isn’t healthy and that he probably should help you. He does try at times, takes you outside and encourages you to interact with the people on the cash register or with the waiter/waitress ready to take your order. Such attempts often end up with him doing everything in the end though. He’s initially always a bit disappointed, clear by the small sigh he gives, but it’s all forgotten when you break out of your shell and shower him with affection at home.

Itadori Yuji

🩷Yuji is a supportive boyfriend so he’d definitely take it upon himself to help you with your social anxiety. Sure, sometimes it’s cute when you squirm nervously behind him but he knows that social interaction is important. He himself is socially very active and loves to take you outside for dates as well and whilst he doesn’t mind staying at times home with you, he eventually grows bored. Now, Yuji doesn’t expect you to be the ultimate social butterfly but he wants to reduce your anxiety of talking to strangers and your refusal to ask questions when you need help. If you’re too uncomfortable starting with total strangers, he just asks his friends and his sensei to help you a bit out of your shell. Nobara says that she thinks it’s a bit ridiculous but ends up being the one most supportive out of his teammates anyways.

🩷Mainly because she thinks that Megumi is too gloomy to be much of a help and Gojo…well, is Gojo. He visits the same shops and places with you so you grow accustomed to the staff and the people working there, encourages you to speak up for yourself. The pink-haired boy never leaves you alone though so you always have a feeling of reassurance by having him next to you. It’s really sweet, he praises you and compliments you when you do manage to speak up for yourself and showers you in little kisses but also isn’t disappointed if you can’t do something. He’s celebrating even the small steps you take but don’t worry, if it’s too much he’s there to take over for you.

[serendipitysparks]

Haikyuu!!: The Psychology of the Game

Core Themes:

Growth Mindset and Self-Actualization (Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs)

Central to the story is the psychological concept of self-actualization, particularly as seen through the lens of characters like Hinata Shoyo and Kageyama Tobio. Throughout the anime, Hinata’s relentless pursuit of improvement exemplifies Maslow's idea of self-actualization—the desire to achieve one’s full potential. His journey isn't just about mastering volleyball, but also overcoming his initial feelings of inferiority and stepping into a space where he can reach the highest potential of his innate skills. Meanwhile, Kageyama struggles with egoistic tendencies and must move beyond the "Esteem" stage of Maslow’s hierarchy to achieve true mastery.

Cognitive Dissonance and Mental Struggles (Festinger’s Cognitive Dissonance Theory)

Kageyama's early inability to collaborate with others on the court creates an internal struggle—his highly competitive and individualistic nature clashes with the collective dynamics of the team. This dissonance between his inner beliefs (he must always be the best) and the external situation (he needs to trust his teammates) forms a psychological tension that drives much of his character development. Over time, he resolves this dissonance through cognitive restructuring, which eventually leads to greater team cohesion.

Flow and Optimal Experience (Csikszentmihalyi’s Flow Theory)

The state of flow—being deeply immersed in an activity—is essential to many key scenes in Haikyuu!! The volleyball games and practices are full of examples where characters enter a state of flow. Whether it’s Hinata’s pure joy in the air during a spike or Oikawa's artistic precision, moments of peak performance reflect Csikszentmihalyi’s theory. The anime emphasizes how psychological states such as heightened concentration, a loss of self-consciousness, and a sense of effortless control contribute to athletic performance.

Social Identity and Ingroup/Outgroup Dynamics (Tajfel’s Social Identity Theory)

Throughout Haikyuu!!, the relationships between characters reveal how group identities influence behavior. The rivalry between Karasuno and teams like Aoba Johsai or Nekoma highlights social identity theory—the tendency to categorize individuals into "ingroups" (the team) and "outgroups" (the rival teams). The characters' sense of pride in their team leads to strong in-group biases, but as the series progresses, we also see how mutual respect across group boundaries (as seen in the evolving relationship between Kageyama and Oikawa) challenges and reshapes these identity structures.

Psychological Resilience and Post-Traumatic Growth

Many characters, especially Ushijima, come from backgrounds where their intense focus on volleyball was a means of coping with past emotional trauma. Their resilience reflects the idea of post-traumatic growth—a psychological concept where individuals emerge from adversity stronger and more enlightened. Ushijima's stoic nature is rooted in a defensive mechanism, which is gradually revealed through subtle flashbacks and interactions with other players. The anime portrays how their personal history, traumas, and coping mechanisms influence their approach to competition.

Attachment Styles and Interpersonal Relationships (Bowlby’s Attachment Theory)

The bonds between teammates in Haikyuu!! are explored through attachment theory. For example, Hinata's initial over-attachment to Kageyama’s validation reflects an anxious attachment style, where he seeks constant approval from his "stronger" teammate. Over time, his evolution into a more autonomous player symbolizes the growth of a more secure attachment style, where he learns to rely on himself and his teammates rather than external validation.

Hinata Shoyo: A perfect representation of self-determination theory—his intrinsic motivation and constant drive to master the game reveal a deep inner desire to achieve competence, autonomy, and relatedness. His development demonstrates how intrinsic motivation can lead to personal growth and transformation.

Kageyama Tobio: Initially, his authoritarian leadership style reflects the dark triad of personality traits—narcissism, Machiavellianism, and psychopathy. However, his growth highlights how emotional intelligence and self-regulation (central to the Emotional Intelligence Theory by Goleman) can help a person shift from toxic leadership to collaboration.

Oikawa Tooru: His narcissistic personality and need for admiration align with Freud’s theory of the ego but are also tempered with deep insecurity that drives him to outperform others. Oikawa’s rivalry with Kageyama demonstrates how different attachment styles can lead to distinct interpersonal dynamics, including jealousy, admiration, and competition.

Tobio Kageyama and Shouyou Hinata (Teamwork Psychology): Their interpersonal conflict resolution is rooted in collaborative problem-solving. Kageyama’s control-oriented, high-performance demeanor contrasts with Hinata’s exuberant, less disciplined approach. Their partnership is a dynamic example of how cognitive-behavioral strategies (CBT) can help modify maladaptive behaviors and create synergistic interactions.

[co5oo]

Hey, me again!

I totally agree with everything you said. The show does talk about very serious topics, even if all of it is then excuse and red conned to soccer- and I do agree that it's a bit too much, sometimes. You're so right mentionning the war plot line, but also, can we talk about it's not even just soccer

It's JUNIOR soccer

Isn't there any adult team who could fight against aliens instead of kids?

But to come back to Kidou and Kageyama, yes, I 100% agree with everything you said. It's a deeply unhealthy co dependent relationship, and while Kidou obviously can not be held accountable for this, he's a child, Kageyama is an adult and to me cannot be excused for anything he did. I'm always struck by how obsessive he is with Kidou, to such a level it's actually creepy, even if the show often brush over it because ~soccer~. Like, he literally tried to RECREATE him through another child! Keeps calling him his "greatest creation", and begging him to come back to him! If all of it was not a subplot to reinforce the message of the power of friendship, it would be actually frightening. Imagine a grown ass man being so obsess with a boy that he keeps trying to recreate him. Imagine playing the sport you're so passionnated about with a carbon copy of yourself on the field, except it's the version of yourself in the darkest moments of your life. Horrifying.

And Kidou is utterly terrified of him, once he's out of Teikoku- actually, he already was terrified by Kageyama at the very beginning of the show. I remember him covering away, clutching his old magazine against him, trying to back of from his poor excuse of a coach. And once he's out, damn, if the show was actually aimed at more mature audience- what we see already strongly reminds me of PTSD, you know, when he keeps seeing Kageyama everywhere, looking, following and talking to him, and how it completely wrecks his usual reasonnable mindset. It's brushed over too quickly, once again, and it's so obvious he's not at all over that terrible relation he has with this man

And of course Kageyama dies before he gets to fully sort it out, and all Kidou has left is this leftover of fear, mixed with the impression of still owning that awful man everything. It's heartbreaking to me that we see him keep the glasses, like he's forever keeping with him part of Kageyama, and never, therefore, truly shaking his hold off of himself. We never get to see the aftermath, of course, because ina11 is not about that, but dang it's a shame.

I would absolutely love to hear every thoughts you have about Kidou, too!! Like, your headcanons, for example? The plot points you're most interested in? I'm taking anything, really, as I'm joining you in the autistic hyperfixation, ahah

first of all i wanna say i am absolutely astonished at the fact that i finally found someone that i 100% agree on every single point of view regarding kidou and that someone is you. congratulations we are brain twins

second, the ask is already long (WHICH I GREATLY APPRECIATE, SERIOUSLY), so just click on read more to see my reply (its to not clog people's feeds!)

KEEP IN MIND WHAT YOURE ABOUT TO READ IS 90% PERSONAL HEADCANON. i do try to link it to canon as much as possible tho.

well, from all what you said i have not much more to add because, again, its a carbon copy of my kidou interp. actually insane. im very happy! except maybe for the last part but I'll leave it for later

im just gonna talk about my 😁😁 my son whom i love!!! in a general way

first of all getting out of the way the basics if you ever see me use they/them for kidou is because my headcanon is nonbinary (he/they/xe, but for simplicity I'll mostly use he in this). second of all, hondureño, bio parents moved to japan for permanent business. 5'3, short king, possibly underweight but fit enough to play and not get exhausted. autistic and schizophrenic. thats the basics for headcanons

heres the not so basics!!!!

kidou yuuto is an extremely complex character and hes only 13. being a complex character and a teen is already a burden. why are you having the mental capacities and developements of an adult bro you should be? watching adventure time and going to bed before 10 pm get SERIOUS. and its because i genuinely believe kidou "matured" way quicker than most his friends (gouenji also has this issue, but less exaggerated). this is for two reasons. one is a personal headcanon and its simply me thinking puberty hit him early-ish 😅. the second one is EVERY single figure of authority in his life has expected things from him that a preteen shouldn't even know about. his step father's insistancy for perfection (might talk more abt that later) and a need for kidou to HURRY AND GROW UP so he can be successful. and of course, the man himself kageyama treating kidou as if he was a completely independent adult for more than one or two reasons... this cycle would kinda stop when he joins raimon. the coaches, both hitomiko and kudou, are strict with him, but thats because theyre GOOD at their job. they can tell between a kid and an grown ass man. i said the cycle would stop, but not break. kidou has already been used to be seen as the grown up of the team of sorts. he's the...the clever one. the one that directs the teammates, that strategises every move. the one in charge, the big man. indirectly and accidentally, his teammates influence this perception of him further. if you notice kidou has a wayy more formal way of talking. the only thing he's more childish in is when he's getting petty revenge (more clearly shown in orion), or..when he's with endou.

endou is probably one of the many keys to kidou's healing and the comfort of sorrows in the series. not completely, of course. but they see this other kid, a ray of sunshine that no matter how bad things get, he never gives up, he always offers a smile, even to his enemies. despite being the same age, endou becomes a role model of sorts for kidou. at first is more some kind of blinding jealousy. ' how come he can be so satisfied with life? why is he okay even when he loses? how is he happy being this imperfect? kidou can't grasp the idea of having a literal polar opposite being their friend, but eventually accepts it. endou offers a light in kidou's life that they have never seen before, and it's so warm and it feels so nice, it's natural kidou would stay with endou even in adulthood. he brings comfort. he picks kidou up when they can't bring themself to get back up. he makes them believe in a newfound sense of community with the team, and an enjoyment that only 13 year olds could have. so kidou can relax more when he's around with endou, or hell, with a good part of the raimon team as a whole.

now, if you go back to the first parragraph, notice how i put mature in quotations. and that's because kidou hasn't ACTUALLY matured at all. he was forcefully shoved into this role of responsibility with no way out, and believed it to be simply that his genius was far beyond the rest. when he's probably average, excluding him probably being high capacities. here's another headcanon that when he reaches 15-16 years old he has one of the biggest burnouts in the history of gifted burnouts. but in the end its not..true. he is not mature, he is hurt, and his best defense is act all "grown up" about it.

aghhh ok theres ONE topic about him. im squishing my brain trying to come up with more in a more or less chronological order......

ok. if i may jab a bit at his friendships, specially regarding the whole thing with shin teikoku in season 2. this small(ish) segment is about the dependency kidou has on his friends. setting aside endou, since i already covered him, im focusing specifically on sakuma and genda. i'll dabble in a bit of fudou too because his dynamic with kidou is a wonder.

mainly the dependancy in question comes from the fact that they all went through the same shit, except kidou suffered it in greater numbers, but still, same issue : some 50 year old guy thinks he can train/manipulate children into killing people via soccer. i am Not exaggerating this i love pointing out always that kageyama actively attempted infanticide (polite reminder. inazuma eleven is STILL a family friendly shonen despite this). so, when confornted with their friends as shin teikoku, kidou can't help but. see himself. that could've been me. that SHOULD'VE been me. remember how he's claiming the guilt for losing against zeus? which is also the reason (kindaaa fudou pulled strings) why sakuma and genda (and some others) decided to accept the alius stone, and brainwashed as they were, took sides with kageyama once again. kidou takes the ENTIRE blame for this thing happening, he even tries to push endou out of it because this is a..teikoku only issue. kidou finds it that his friends were basically the pillar of his crumbling mental state when they were all back at teikoku. he relied on them to perform well in matches so that then he wouldn't be charged with being a bad captain in case something went wrong. and let's be honest here, kidou probably couldn't do a lot of things outside of football without the guidance of his two friends. we also gotta consider, when shin teikoku is happening, genda and sakuma are feeling huuuuge amounts of jealousy towards kidou for being "perfect". the image kidou carefully crafted so that his friends wouldn't be TOO worried about him worked more than better, but at what cost. small summary for this point since its a bit all over the place is. kidou is reliant on his friends, both in soccer and personal life. it causes his friends to worry too much over him and slightly picture him as the centre of attention, which kidou accepts because for him it's the only way which he can mantain the friendship. ooooof course this gets better overtime. im not trying to say his friendship with these two is fake, not at all 🤒 quite the opposite, its just that when you get 3 teens that went thru similar trauma and never heal from it and one keeps dragging the other 2 down subconsciously. well. it needs some fixing.

then comes fudou, and he manages to reverse a gear in kidou's brain, because fudou is BOLD and Direct. and he puts kidou in his place in his own distasteful way, but it works. he also drags along sakuma and genda with him. fudou is like some kind of ' back to reality ' tool. they work together pretty well, unlike with sakuma and genda which is a constant of ' ok i support you and you support me and we support each other and we balance this tower of support so it doesnt topple over except it does, eventually '. with fudou, he grounds kidou, and kidou lifts fudou up. at least thats how i see it.

to not make this post too long I'll cover only one last topic. i think its time we enter kageyama territory.

BOY you dont know how much i could talk about these two. I'll start by saying DID ANYONE ELSE NOTICE HOW BARELY ANYONE CARES ABOUT THE LIOCOTT ISLAND ARC??? WHERE HE JUST. FINDS OUT KAGEYAMA IS FREE AND IN THE ISLAND AND HE GOES CRAZY. BECAUSE I THINK THIS IS THE FOCAL POINT OF EVERYTHING at least prior to the match against italy (bullshit episode. because of kidou's subplot. the match was fucking awesome)

i dont see this talked about enough. about kidou feeling GENUINE TERROR at the idea of seeing that man again. and kidou worrying more about what might happen to his friends and teammates MORE THAN WHAT KAGEYAMA COULD DO TO HIM. and then fucking demonio astrada shows up and its like???!?!?!?? his whole. fucking. world crumbles away because suddenly he, HE THE PERFECT CREATION IS REPLACEABLE.

OKAY IM GONNA USE ALL CAPS NOW BECAUSE I FEEL SO STRONGLY ABOUT THIS AND IM GONNA USE PRETTY BLUNT WORDS. KAGEYAMA HAS SUCCESSFULLY MADE A HOLLOW OUT OF KIDOU, SO SO SO EASY TO MANIPULATE ITS NOT EVEN FUNNY. HE MANAGES TO MAKE KIDOU THINK THAT THEY WEREN'T ALL THAT IMPORTANT FOR HIM, EVEN AFTER TAKING THEM IN SINCE AGE 8, EVEN AFTER ACTING AS AN ACTUAL PARENT BECAUSE DID YOU KNOW KIDOU'S STEP FATHER ASKED KAGEYAMA TO RAISE THEM??? DID YOU KNOW KIDOU WAS RAISED BY THEIR GROOMER??????? AND DID YOU KNOW KIDOU DEVELOPED AN ATTACHMENT TO KAGEYAMA BECAUSE HE WAS THE ONLY ROLE MODEL THEY COULD LOOK UP TO? BECAUSE HE DID ACTUALLY TEACH THEM EVERYTHING? BECAUSE EVERY EVERYYYY SINGLE ASPECT OF KIDOU'S LIFE HAS BEEN TOUCHED BY KAGEYAMA THERE IS NO TRACE OF KIDOU!!!! THERE'S NO KIDOU!!! IT'S JUST THE VERSION OF KIDOU THAT KAGEYAMA WANTED TO SEE.

...............and that's why i think the whole thing of post-italy match happens so quickly. kageyama suddenly revealing he loves soccer and is actually decent? my ass. yes he does love soccer. yes this hatred and impulsiveness roots from his hatred towards his father. NO, it does NOT justify the acts. it does not justify what kidou went through, only because some GUY couldn't PULL HIS SHIT TOGETHER AND WORK ON HIS DADDY ISSUES

did you notice kageyama projects HEAVILYYY on kidou??? the mentality. ' if i suffered then so he will ' because he sees his younger self in kidou. he also saw it in fideo but he didn't have enough time to groom him before he got killed in an accident ROFL🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪🤪

but yeah.

kidou. forgives kageyama. because what Else can he do? what else could he possibly do? kidou mourns kageyama because who else does he have? he feels lost. he doesn't realise how much pain he's been through, he keeps giving kageyama chance after chance after chance and all kageyama does is break him further and further. and now he's showing a good side. over some italian kid that he met 3 days ago. what did fideo did that kidou didn't? what else can kidou do at that point except. forgiving and forgetting.

so yeah. period.

now, i dont like assuming, but i get the feeling you havent seen inazuma eleven GO? if you have then good, I'll just briefly mention this. spoiler free except for the fact that. drumroll. kageyama is back!!!!! and he's um. normaler? he's not trying to manipulate or kill kids. kinda. he does financially coerce them BUT ANYWAYS.

yes, 10 years later kageyama returns and kidou. Knows that. and he's an adult now, so he can actually be...calm about it. but it just makes you wonder. how does it actually make him feel? knowing it was all left unresolved. knowing kidou didn't have the means to heal or even Realise most of the wrong stuff. did he realise? does he resent kageyama? his thoughts on this in GO are a mysery for me to be honest. i simply assume he's slowly working on getting better.

2 more things. 1. im not gonna talk about aries. its kinda the same shit except kidou isnt there AND THANK GOD. GET AWAY FROM THEM. GET A JOB.

2. you might find it positive that kidou Does eventually shed his goggles. his sister gifts him a different pair. which brings us to our last topic. what does haruna know about all this?

i honestly dont think haruna is even half aware of what Exactly kidou went through. she knows the basics...that he was. bad. and hurt kids. but thats about it. she doesn't know the magnitude in which this man has affected her brother. and we know kidou isn't the most talkative about it. she just...feels that something is wrong. that her brother is different from any other older brothers other people have. and she takes it upon herself to make sure he's ok, even if she doesn't know exactly what she's fighting against.

THATS ALL. THATS ALL!!!! IM DONE. gosh what a ride. 1:20 hours of typing!!!! im also sleep deprived so sorry if some of this doesnt make sense. bleehhhhh thank you for letting me talk about kidou yuuto 💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛💛