#to clarify i do have pockets of time but then i'm just too tired to sit down and actually write

[pandora15]

y'all i'm behind on reading whumptober fic, let alone writing it

but I wanna write something :/

but I don't know when I'll have time and I really feel like writing some whump would be good for me

[luveline]

OK THE STEVE ZOMBIE AU BUT HE DOES FINALLY MIRACULOUSLY FIND ROBIN OR MAYBE DUSTIN OR LITERALLY ANYONE FAMILIAR. Our girl is happy but also like 👀 u finna ditch me now?

theres literally no zombies in this lmao </3 apocalypse au with new (but not really) boyfriend steve wherein you reunite with some old friends and find a community (and worry steve is gonna break up w u) fem!reader 7k words

The border between Indiana and Michigan is quiet. Nothing denotes its location besides a Welcome to Indiana sign. 

Steve's hand tightens around yours. You stand there for minutes, wind breezing past your tired bodies and ruffling his limp hair. 

"Do you think this is our last time seeing Indiana?" you ask quietly. 

There's no need to shout. The town surrounding the border is abandoned. 

He drops your hand. You miss his touch and the soothing effect it gives to hold it immediately. 

"Maybe," he says. "Does that bother you?" 

It fucking scares you. Staying there wasn't really an option anymore, not with the infestation of geeks dribbling away from Indianapolis or the lack of food. And besides that, you'd wanted to get to Michigan badly. Steve and his friend Robin had been planning to come here together before their untimely separation. Half of Hawkins had been aiming for Michigan after the news broke all those months ago — Illinois, Ohio, and Kentucky overrun by flesh-eating monsters. 

But if you leave Indiana, you're admitting it's a lost cause. That the lives you led there are gone, candles snuffed out by a sudden ripping gale. 

"I just…" You look over your shoulder at Michigan. "Can't believe we're here." 

"I think I'm glad we're here." 

You cock your head toward him. 

"Not just to find Robin," he clarifies. "But, no offence? Indiana was kicking your ass." 

You grimace at his implication. Indiana was kicking your ass. You've rolled your ankle more times than you can count. You'd fallen ten feet through the floor and given yourself a major concussion. You've been snarled at, robbed at knifepoint, and almost eaten. 

"Fucking Indiana," you say. 

"Fuck Indiana." He turns on his heel, but not before he's wrapped a hand around your arm to drag you with him. "Michigan better be nice to my girl, or we're going to Canada." 

You've already let him walk you a couple of feet when you have the bearings to splutter, "Your girl?" 

He ignores you, the smallest hint of a smile playing on his lips. You’re pretty confident in being his girlfriend, but something about being ‘his girl’ makes your head rush.

You'd found a gun a little ways back but no ammunition for it. It's a good prop regardless, so Steve keeps it in hand stuffed into the pocket of his windbreaker ready to scare off anyone with enough wits to find guns scary. You're sitting ducks otherwise, armed with one small penknife and the metal baseball bat that Steve keeps in the strap of his rucksack, so you stick to the side roads. Being out in the open is risky. You're used to this mode of living, adept at slinking and skulking in dimly dark places. 

"Steve?" you ask, a murmur in the ringing quiet. Cicadas chirp in the trees, leaves rustling with each burst of wind. 

"Yeah?" he asks shortly, distracted by the door in front of him. 

He's attempting to pick the lock of a convenience store's sidedoor. You're standing guard.

"Where do you think Robin is?" 

He doesn't answer for a while. He works a delicate job, the slim pick in his hand creaking formidably with every wrong move. He's too forceful, and you're the better locksmith, but your wrist still twinges from your fall in the woods a few days ago. Steve's too protective for his own good. 

"I don't know. But she's smart, and-" He hisses, hair falling into his eyes. "I'm hoping she's still here." 

"If I were her, I'd wait for you." 

He tips his head back to meet your eyes. "If you ever stay somewhere dangerous waiting for me, I'll fist fight you." 

Usually you'd burst into laughter at his familiar abrupt absurdity — you've grown to adore his jokes now that you know there's no real malice behind them — but you want him to hear what you're saying. You want to know if he'd do the same. 

"I would," you say softly. 

The lock clicks open. 

Steve grins at you. "You won't need to. You're stuck with me like glue." 

Inside of the store is a sorry sight. While the shutters had been down, a good sign, the interior is much less promising. Sunshine filters in through the smallest cracks, casting a scarce light over what's left of the aisles. Two are crushed to one side as if a huge hand has swept them away. Smashed booze bottles litter the floor. Glass like snow crunches underfoot, and a sticky sour smell is heavy in the air. 

You ease into the room on pins. 

"There's gotta be something," Steve says, pulling his pocket-sized torch out to give you a better view. 

Where the shelves have collapsed, there's a small tunnel to the front of the room. You bend down to assess it. 

"I think there's cookies over there." 

"Where?" Steve demands. You point to aforementioned treats.

He army crawls through the gap and pops out on the other side. Those few seconds where you can't see him are unsettling, and from the speed with which he looks at you, he may have felt the same. 

"Keep an eye out," he says. 

You turn to the door. You've closed it tight but it won't lock without a key, and anyone might assume what you have and come inside. 

Steve hisses an excited, "Yes!" 

"How'm I s'posed to keep watch when you're doing that?" 

"Babe, there's fucking Chips Ahoy." He loves them.

"I'm sick of Chips Ahoy," you mumble to yourself. "I miss carrots. And potatoes. I miss pasta. Pasta." 

"Should I be jealous?" 

"Definitely. I'd trade you for a full, home-cooked meal any day, handsome. Fresh made pasta, sun dried tomatoes. Garlic bread." You could cry thinking about it, all those rich flavours together. 

"Call me crazy, but I think we could make you some pasta. Look-" He holds up a small jar. "Crushed garlic." 

You brighten. "Where'd you find that?" 

Garlic is a great flavour to make literally anything taste better, like all the canned stuff people don't always take: artichoke hearts, asparagus, aubergine. 

"Holy shit, score.” Steve holds another tin up, torch held between his chest and his upper arm. 

Your eyes turn round as saucers. 

That night, you decide to stay in the convenience store. You'll be cornered if somebody tries to get in, but you'll be safe from geeks and the elements. Two out of three isn't bad. 

You and Steve share the only fork, chowing down on his amazing find of tinned vegetable soup and dumplings. It barely registers in your head that it's cold, it's so nice to be eating something that isn't spaghettios. You could've built a fire outside to warm it if you weren't scared of being spotted by scroungers. Or worse, cannibals. 

"Maybe we should go outside. Look for smoke," you say. Smoke means people.

"Good idea.” He urges you to take what's left of the soup, stands, and kisses the top of your head as he does.

You're pretty sure there's bliss like the light of a star radiating off of your skin, elated at his easy affection. You're almost as happy to get to finish the soup. 

While he's gone, you open your bag and scrounge for what little self-care you have. Toothpaste is abundant in every store no matter how looted, as is soap, but soap needs water, and you're running low. You brush your teeth with toothpaste alone and use a little bit of water on a rag to wipe the oil off of your face, guilty and thankful at once. If you don't wash yourself when you can, you'll go crazy. 

You apply another layer of roll on old spice and hope it'll hold out until you can find another lake, river, or tributary, which shouldn't be impossible. Michigan is surrounded by water, a fact that had put you off coming here at first. 

You go where Steve goes, though, so Michigan it had been, and Michigan it is. 

Your first night’s already proved fruitful. There's more than enough food here if you're willing to get weird (and you and Steve usually are). More food than you could carry. 

Which is a little suspicious, now that you think about it. 

Nobody thought to look here? 

Is there anybody to look? 

You push all your stuff aside and scramble onto your knees, suddenly paranoid. Steve's taking too long, what if this place is a trap? A honeytrap to lure in mindless ants. What if they've already grabbed him, and– 

"Oh, Jesus," Steve says as he opens the door, voice uber loud in the night time stillness. "You scared me. What's the matter, need to pee?" 

"I thought somebody kidnapped you," you say, trying for joking and missing by a mile. 

Steve leans against the door. He's regained his controlled volume and demeanour, "Safe and sound. I'm serious, do you need to pee?" 

You and Steve pad out your corner of the store against the pilfered chip aisle. He lets you use his chest as a pillow, and when he turns off the torch there's nothing to do but listen to his breathing and feel his chest move under your ear. 

You rub his sternum with the heel of your hand. "You could use me as a pillow sometime. If you wanted to." 

"Yeah? You're softer than me, I think I'd love that." 

You draw a short line to his navel, thinking. Lucky to have found him. Lucky to like him this much, and lucky that he likes you. You're 'his girl', and you get to sleep on his chest and sometimes when he's not worrying himself to the bone he'll tell you secrets. You know him better than you’ve ever known anybody.

He curls his arm around your shoulder and takes your upper arm into his hand, the heat from his fingers seeping into your skin. You've taken off your coat because it's uncomfortable. Steve will fold it over your chest when you fall asleep. 

"It was a good day, right?" He sounds terrified of jinxing it. 

You kiss his chest, or his t-shirt, so lightly he likely doesn't feel it. A kiss for your sake rather than his. "It was a good day." 

He holds you close. His heart thrums in your head. 

"Floor's like a fucking ice cube," he mutters. 

You cover as much of him as you can with your arms, sleep tugging at your eyelids. "I'll keep you warm," you promise as they close. "Wake me up when you get too tired." 

"Alright." He massages your arm in his hand gently, and you fall asleep. 

—

Steve flinches awake at the whisper of a sound outside. A younger Steve, one who'd known nothing about geeks, or people, really, how awful they can be, wouldn't have woken. Hell, Steve could've slept through a hurricane when he was in high school, all those years where he'd stayed up too late playing hooky and smoking Malboro's behind the Big Buy. He looks back now and wonders how much sleep he missed out on in his king-sized mattress, up to his eyeballs in cushy sheets and fresh linens. Why had sleeping felt like such a chore? 

And after that, when he and Robin would stay up watching shitty movies and eating the free stale popcorn from the video store. Though he wouldn't trade any of that away. 

Fucking idiot, he thinks to himself scathingly. He was not supposed to fall asleep. He checks you over quickly. In your sleep you've slid off of his chest and onto the tarp next to him, but you’re unharmed.

He sits up and scrambles for his penknife. Weak dusk light breaks through the store's shutters, dust motes disturbed by his movements diving between rays of light like lightning bugs. His joints click with the force and speed with which he springs up to protect you. 

What sound was that? It had come as loud as a crack of thunder, but could've been something small, a squirrel over a tree branch. 

He should wake you up. If it's one person, even two, you could help him. But if it's more, and they find you… 

He shoulders open the door and walks out into the morning light. 

— 

You wake to hands on your shoulders. 

You're scared instantly. Steve usually wakes you reluctantly, a shake and a whispered, "Up," or, "Up, baby," if he's especially tired. 

"It's me," he says, his voice burning with something you haven't ever heard before. "It's me. Time to wake up." 

You peel your eyes open, horrified at the sight above you. Steve face hovers over your own with his hair tucked behind his ears and a blazing smile, daylight behind him haloing him in gold. 

"You didn't wake me." You bring clumsy hands to his rough cheeks. "Why didn't you wake me? You look so tired." 

He looks electrified, the bags under his eyes no match for his smile. You can feel it as he leans down, as he plants a kiss firmly to your unsuspecting mouth. He kisses you all over, a joyous chuckle bubbling out between them. 

You laugh yourself, tickled as his stubble scratches your cheeks, your neck as he works his way down. 

"There's- There's people," he says. "My people. Fucking Robin-" 

"What?" 

You're a half inch from headbutting him unconscious. Luckily he's already veering upward, stuffing what you'd left on the ground back into your packs. 

"I haven't seen her yet, but there's this other girl we went to school with, Darcy Mulligan, and she said this is an outpost, right? They keep all this shit here for people who need it, and then they watch to see if you're dangerous-" 

"They were watching us?" 

He plows onward, ignoring you, "And they saw us and I went out thinking they were gonna shoot me but-" 

"Steve, we can't go with these people." 

His smile fades a little. "No, we aren't. I told them already, we aren't that stupid. But," — he grabs your arm — "they said they're gonna bring Robin." 

You don't want to keep fighting him. To shoot down this newfound hope, this lightness you've never seen him shine with before, feels cruel. But you don't want him to get ahead of himself. 

"What if they're bringing back reinforcements?" 

He swallows and nods, reassuring your conjectures. "Right, I thought that too, but- I don't know, baby, Darcy was with a guy, and they both had guns. They could've shot me. 'N' if they were empty, the guy could've just knocked me over the head with it, you know?" He crawls impossibly closer than he'd been, hands rubbing your arm unthinking. "I think this is real." 

I want it to be real goes unsaid. 

You're ashamed that you can't find any excitement to wear with him. Dread licks over your skin as you smile at him, as you cup his cheek in your hand, and as you stand up to help him pack away his things. You feel like you're going to your death. 

Steve can read you well. He grabs your shoulders. You're selfishly hoping he'll say you can run. He doesn't. "You trust me?" he asks. 

You deflate, shoulders falling. "Of course I do." 

"Thank you." He tries to pull you in for a hug but you're reeling, distracted, he has to persuade you, and he does so sweetly. "Hey, c'mere, come on." He pulls at you. "Come here." 

You flop into his chest with all the grace of a shored fish, arms limp. He smells like sweat which probably means you do too, but he smells like himself, and that's what's important. 

"Nothing bad is going to happen to you." 

"What about you?" 

"If Robin's here, I have to take the risk. She's my best friend." 

You understand that. You'd never ask him not to do this, because you'd do it for him. If you'd ever gotten separated, you'd spend months looking for him. Years, maybe. He's the only person left. 

You have no clue if he'd do the same for you.

He scrubs at your back roughly. Such a boyish kind of hug. 

"You have your knife?" he asks. 

You have it. Rather than let them corner you in here, you both make your way out into the woods. Steve shows you the short path he'd taken to find Darcy Mulligan and the man she'd been with, evidence of their stakeout left in the embers of a small fire. You stand frozen with a tree trunk to your back and Steve stations himself in front of you, pack secured on your back. Steve has his baseball bat in hand. What good will it serve against a possible group of gunmen? You start to panic, really panic, and you're a hair's width from begging him to run with you when his grip on the bat falters. 

"Fuck," he says softly. 

Three people turn the corner; a dark haired girl with twin pigtails and a rifle hanging at her side; a boy, presumably the man Steve had mentioned; and a shorter girl with light brown hair, her expression — her entire body — lit with happiness, elation, and her laugh loud enough to prove it. 

"Holy shit," Steve says. 

You forget to be scared. You forget to worry. Steve lets the baseball bat drop out of his hand, and then he's taking three weak steps forward to meet her, and that's it, it's her, Robin throws her arms around his neck and nearly barrels him to the ground. His hands come up to meet her. He's shaking so hard you're surprised he can grip her waist, his face crushed to the side of her head. 

Tears well in your eyes. To get to see this, so soon, when you'd thought maybe Steve might never see his best friend ever again, is a blessing. It's a fucking miracle. 

Your tears bite back when the boy moves forward and hugs him too. 

You tighten your grip on your knife and pull it from your pocket, confused and alarmed that Steve's about to get gutted, but Steve starts to shake worse. 

It takes you a second to realise he's crying. 

"Henderson," he says. 

Oh. It's Dustin. You've heard enough stories about him to know it. He has the same curly hair, and while he's taller than you'd thought, Steve had only ever talked about one Henderson. 

Steve's relief is a knot in your throat. You wipe your cheek quickly with the back of your hand and shove the knife into your pocket. 

Over their heads, the dark haired girl narrows her eyes at you. 

"I can't believe you're here," Steve says, voice raspy with emotion. 

You have never heard him cry. 

"Where have you been, Steve?" Robin asks hoarsely. 

You take a step toward him without thinking, and he hears it despite everything and looks up at you with a teary-eyed smile. 

"We got lost," he says, holding your gaze. 

"Lost? It's been months. We thought you were zombie mulch, you shithead." 

"I'm here, aren't I?" He rolls his eyes at you, like he's saying Get a load of this guy? 

It's a reassuring gesture even if he doesn't mean for it to be. You're still a team. 

"Hi," Robin says, her hands clasped in Steve's shirt, but her attention fully yours. "I'm Robin." 

You don't have a chance to introduce yourself. Steve does it for you, and he says, "She's my girl. Saved me this entire time." 

What the fuck does that mean?

Robin looks at you again. "No fucking way." 

"Only took an apocalypse for Steve to get a girlfriend," Dustin says. 

There's something about their playful arguing that makes you want to cry again. It's the relief they've padded it with. You can imagine how brilliant it must feel to make fun of somebody you'd thought long dead. 

"Don't worry, Y/N," Robin says gravely, "there are tons of dudes at camp. You have options." 

Steve steps on her foot. 

"We should head back," Darcy says shortly. 

On the walk, Steve feels very far away. He keeps looking at you to check you're there, but his thoughts are months ago, recounting the details of your survival to his friends in short. You and Steve had been together since basically the very start when you'd saved him from a horde, and he tells that with pride. So much so you feel heat blooming behind your neck and at the tips of your ears. 

"We fucking floored to to the meeting point but you guys weren't there-" 

"Sorry-" 

"No, it's okay," he says. "I get it. It was rough." All of you shiver at the memory. Hawkins had been hit hard, a close knit town with nowhere to hide.

"No we- we should’ve fucking waited- I begged them to wait," Robin says. 

"Who did you get out with?" 

And there's the list of survivors. It's short. The amount of orphaned kids is extremely depressing, and for a while there's silence. All those people. Dustin's mom, Robin's dad. 

"Hopper's here, though," Dustin adds after a while.

"That explains why you're still alive." 

"Actually, dickhead, we're alive because I'm awesome. The radio-" 

"How many people are there?" Steve interrupts. 

"It's a whole new world, Harrington." 

It's better. 

You turn onto what looks like an old college campus and suddenly, there's people. So many people you walk backward and almost tumblr off of the curb, because fuck. There's noise, and smells, and sounds. There are little kids running around in a closed off area of the quad, laughing and chasing after one another. There are guns on guards patrolling makeshift walls. 

Your ears start ringing. 

"Think your girlfriend's gonna pass out," Darcy says. 

You're the last one to figure out she's talking about you. 

"Oh, hey. Hey," Steve says, stepping toward you. 

You take another step back. 

"Baby," he says softly. 

"There's people here." 

"So many new boyfriend's to choose from," he jokes. He's tentative, but he offers his hand like he knows you'll take it. "Come on. I promise I won't get jealous when you run off with somebody cooler." 

"I don't want somebody cooler," you say. 

"Okay, awesome, 'cause I was lying. I'd be super jealous. I'd feed myself to the geeks." 

"Don't say that." 

He grins at you, hand hovering in the gap between your bodies unwavering. Trust me, it says. Nothing bad is going to happen to you. 

You take Steve's hand. 

—

The world is more than you and Steve against it. There are people to answer to. 

Chief Hopper actually recognises you when he sees you. He recognises Steve first, and he gives him a pat on the back. You aren't expecting any hellos, figuring you're barely a memory to him, but Hopper smiles at you like you've just told him you have the antidote for zombification in your rucksack. 

"It's good to see you, kid."

That night, in the dining hall, you get a small welcome between shift announcements. Hundreds of heads turn your way, and while some house cagey unsurety, the majority are happy to see you. 

You sit with Steve and his friends (plural, a growing number, because nearly all of them are here), torn between stopping him from crying his eyes out with happy tears and listening to the older woman sitting beside you. Her name is Mallory, and she offers a generous gift. 

"You have any questions at all, sweetpea, and you can come to me. Or if you just wanna talk, my shoulder's right here." She pats it for emphasis. 

"Thank you so much." But, you want to say, I have Steve.

"Young love, and in a time like this." Mallory's smile is genuine, if a little haunted. "It's amazing." 

You indulge her, turning from Steve just slightly. "But?" 

She brushes a strand of hair behind her ears. It's three colours, a faded red at the middle, a mix of grey and brown at the top. "Listen, I have some unsolicited advice for you hon, but I'm not trying to offend you when you just got here." 

You shake your head. "No," you say hurriedly, "of course not. I wouldn't think that." 

She digs around in her pocket and opens her hand covertly under the table. When you look at it, she hisses. "No, don't. Keep your eyes up." 

You right your gaze accordingly. The canteen is simply that — the college's canteen. Every night there's something cooking, and every morning if they can afford it. Although you'd been told some people eat at home, most people come here, because this is the only place with a reliable generator. From where you're sitting, you can see everybody, and you suspect Steve had chosen this vantage point on purpose. 

Hopper stands at the front of the room behind another man, who's moved from the important stuff and is now lamenting at the book club's low attendance. They have a fucking book club. You can't believe it. 

Mallory drops something into your hand. A hard-boiled candy.

"My advice," she says, the two of you watching as Hopper and the second man confer, "is to try and be in both worlds at once." 

"You've lost me." 

"That's not a good sign, I've barely started," she jokes, laughing so much that the men sitting across from you laugh too. She carries on, "What I mean is, this isn't home. It probably never will be. We fight so hard to make it home, we plant trees, 'n' we sleep warm every night, but…" She squeezes your shoulder amicably, a light, quick touch. "I know how it felt when I got here. Me and my husband, we kept to ourselves. And we were right to, not everybody here can be good. But when he died, I had nobody." 

You let your eyes drop to you plate, a small portion of a soup that's not the best and a sandwich that's marginally better. You get what Mallory's trying to say — don't put your eggs all in one basket, not when the basket might get mauled to death any day coming. 

You get what she's trying to say. You don't appreciate it. 

"Thank you," you say weakly. 

She nods, and Steve saves you from anymore conversation with an arm hooked through yours. 

“You okay?” he asks. Unmistakably fond. 

You can feel the eyes of all of his friends. All these people you knew too, or knew of, and should be happy to see. You should be so fucking happy right now. 

So why aren’t you?

You turn your face to his and take him in. He’s got a red rash of skin over the top of his head from prolonged sunburn and a scar under his left eye from a cruel tree branch. He looks different than the Steve you’d met at school, and he looks different still from the Steve you’d saved on day 1. 

But he’s your Steve. 

You drop your forehead into his neck, love like a warm blanket encapsulating you when he presses a kiss against your forehead. 

“I know,” he says, moving back, forcing you to sit up again. “It’s crazy.”

You return his smile, though you aren’t sure you're on the same page. 

—

Little Hawkins makes you want to curl up into a ball and cry. It’s a floor of rooms in the campus dormitories, and Robin shares with a couple of other people your age. She only has a mattress and her things on the ground in one room, but soon Steve and another guy are dragging another mattress from across campus while you watch. 

"No offence," Steve says, "but I'm trying to spoil you right now. Can you stop pouting? I'm giving you a breather." 

"I don't believe you." 

He and the unnamed man lean the mattress up outside of Robin's door. 

"Well," he says warmly, and you're starting to feel lovesick with how sweet he's being, nearly enough to forget how scared you are, "maybe you should try." 

Steve is nice. He's always been nice, ever since you met him, even if that nice was strapped down and buried under one layer of derision, one layer of sarcasm, and another layer of sternness for prosperity. But this is another level. Ever since he woke you up he's been ridiculous (he's been the kind of affectionate you've secretly ached for). Steve's sparing with affection but you wouldn't ever complain — can you expect him to play doting boyfriend when each day he's hardwired and on the fritz trying to make sure you both don't die agonising, gross deaths? 

This is fucking crazy, though. 

Steve pulls you bodily by the waist into his front and talks into the highest point of your cheek, words muffled by your skin, "When was the last time we slept on a mattress? Gotta be months ago," — you lean into him entirely, he takes your weight with zero qualms — "when we were in that house by the lake with all the soaps." 

"So many soaps," you murmur, melted by his closeness. 

He laughs. He giggles, all boyish and pretty and you can't help yourself, you lift your chin, practically begging for a kiss. 

You get a short one. Steve's too busy laughing. "And the canned pickles. I know they were, like, doomsdayers, but what did we count, like-" 

"Fifty seven-" 

"Fifty seven jars of pickles," he finishes. 

If this is what Steve is like here, you can make the trade. You don't trust anybody that isn't him, and it feels like you're surrounded by people who could easily hurt you, but his easy joy right now is contagious. 

Robin's voice comes loud from inside her room. "Hey, lovebirds! Are you coming in? They turn all the lights off in like, twenty minutes." 

It's obvious how much Steve trusts Robin. You get the mattress in her room through a series of squeezing and hoping, and she shows you her fancy little sink with running water, nothing short of pride in her eyes. 

"It's freezing," she says, "but you can wash up." 

It genuinely doesn't bother you that it's cold, emotionally. Physically you get the jitters, and it's worth it because Steve pities you and wraps you up tight to rub your arms. He and Robin talk a lot, so much that your brain has given up on listening. It's not something you're happy to hear anyhow, your perilous journey. Steve is generous on your account, leaving out all your most embarrassing moments. 

You sit on the end of the mattress and wonder if you can take your shoes off. 

"Robin?" you ask. 

Both turn to look at you, surprised. 

"Yeah?" 

"Does the door lock?"

She brings her legs up to her chest, chin on her knees. "There's no deadbolt, but you need a key to open it from the outside. So kind of?" She watches you for a moment, and then she nods towards the desk covered in books. "I used to put the chair under the handle when I first got here. You can do that, if you're worried." 

You nod uselessly and get up to do just that. 

"Thanks, Robs," Steve says. 

"Yep." She flops into a ball on her side and pulls the blankets up and over her face. "Goodnight, then." 

Steve laughs and steps over your legs so he can get to her. "Robin," he says, pulling the blankets down. "I- I really missed you." 

She holds out her arms and they hug. She pats his back. "Missed being a pain in my neck, maybe," she mutters. He pushes away from her in mock disgusts and they smile, a shared smile that douses you in an unfair jealousy. You shrug it off pretty quickly when he sits down on the mattress beside you, looking content and, shockingly, really tired. 

He encourages you up to the top of the mattress beside him and folds up the blanket from the rucksack for you as a pillow, sliding it under your head. When he seems confident that you're comfortable he blows out the candle burning on Robin's desk. 

This part's easy, you and Steve in the dark. You're practised in the art of moving around one another. 

Your heart pounds in your ears as Steve pulls a heavy blanket over the both of you, his arm strewn across your stomach haphazardly. 

"Are you okay?" he whispers. 

You turn your face to his though you can't see it. "Of course I am. Are you okay?" 

"I know this is weird." 

Weird doesn't feel like the right word. Surreal, maybe. Something out of a dream. 

"I think my back aches more on the mattress, I'm so used to twisting myself into knots between your legs." 

He snorts. "That doesn't sound right." 

You cover his arm with your hand. "Pig." 

"You can lie on my chest, if you want." 

"Think it's your turn to use me as cushioning." Your voice is coloured by your smile. 

He exhales into your shoulder. 

"Mm. This is nice," he murmurs. 

"You want me to take the first shift?" 

"I don't think we need shifts." 

You can't agree. Steve trusts Robin and you trust Steve, but you do not trust Robin. She seems lovely, and through Steve's stories you know she's a good person, but he hasn't seen her in a year. She could be anybody, and she's locked into a room with you.

You don't mean to be deceitful. "Alright," you utter, "no shifts." 

"You smell nice," Steve says. His lips move against your skin, and he lifts his head enough to kiss your jaw, three kisses in succession. "Goodnight, honey." 

You raise your hand to his head. "Goodnight." 

He falls asleep to you carding through his hair. Even when you're sure he's dead to the world you keep going, the feeling of it between your fingers calming. 

You don't sleep a wink. 

—

It becomes a mantra. Steve is happy here. Over and over and over. 

You're happy too by consequence; Steve is a new person, still the man you know but with this emanating happiness rolling off of him in waves. 

Chief Hopper has promised to get you and Steve a place together if you want one. This had scared you half to death, because you want one bad, but you'd been expecting a little resistance from Steve (or, admittedly, a lot). Because… 

You're starting to think maybe you aren't scared of the people here. You trust Hopper to run a community that's safe if he says it is, and as the days stretch into a week, two weeks, you start to feel secure. Steve's never far, but that's the terrifying part. 

You're worried Steve is going to leave you. 

It sounds dramatic. It is dramatic. But you're scared shirtless that Steve is going to wake up and realise he doesn't owe you a thing, that he doesn't harbour the affection for you that he thinks he does. You're worried that Steve had gone soft on you because you'd been there, like a habit. 

Your feelings for him only grow, despite this. He's fucking handsome when he's clean-shaven, clean in general. Somebody's mom gives him a haircut and you can't believe it, because he's always been good looking but you can tell he's more confident like this, and the confidence makes him golden. 

He's also super handsy. 

You love it, and you get it. You know you look prettier clean, even more so after somebody's mom gives you a haircut and you've managed to scrub the perma-dirt from under your nails. The want to kiss him is dialled up by a thousand because you always have clean teeth.  

The nagging fear remains even when he's got a mouthful of your neck. 

"Ouch," you moan, hands in his hair, legs spread enough to accommodate his figure between them, "s'like a geek, nibbling on me." 

Steve bites a little harder. 

You gasp at his show of force and push your head away from him. "Steve," you say with a laugh.

"Sorry, sorry," he apologises, pulling back. Elbows at your ribs, he holds his weight off of you though there's no reason to. "My teeth missed you." 

"What the fuck." 

"All of me missed you." He strokes the side of your face mildly. "I hate this." 

You wiggle under him, mattress springs digging into your back. He doesn't bother explaining what he'd meant, only leans down to kiss your cheek, your chin, the tip of your nose. 

You stare at him. 

"What do you hate?" 

He scrunches his nose up like it's obvious, and you're stupid for not knowing. "Us being on separate schedules. It's fucking shitty." 

You don't have an answer for him. It seems more than lucky that he would assuage your worst feelings considering you haven't told him anything at all. You haven't told him about staying up at night to make sure Robin's not gonna kill him, or how worried you are that he's gonna realise he can leave you now you're safe, now you don't owe each other anything. You haven't told him how much you love him, and how much that would hurt. 

Somehow, you get the impression that he knows anyway. 

"This is really nice," you say eventually. 

He rests his face against yours. You close your eyes. 

"What's nice?" he asks. "Our separation? You're sick, babe. I'm trying to bare my heart here and you're stomping all over it." 

"Not our separation, dummy. This. You lying on top of me. It feels really nice." 

His small laugh warms your cheek. "I know. Why'd you think I let you climb all over me for months?" 

"'Cause otherwise we'd freeze to death?" 

He kisses a line down to the skin under your ear. "That, too. But mostly because it feels good." 

You wrap your arms around him and press your nose to his hair, smelling him for your own self-indulgence. He lets his weight press down on you, shifting his arm so they're digging behind your shoulders. 

You hook a leg behind his. 

"Steve, I…" 

"I love you." 

You stiffen. 

He hugs you that tiny bit tighter. "I love you," he says again. "I should've told you before, but I- I was so afraid that you'd-" He clears his throat quietly. "I was fucking terrified that I was going to let you down. You kept almost dying on me, and I kept realising I wouldn't be able to do this without you." 

"I love you too," you say, shell-shocked. 

He kisses your cheek slowly, softly, and then he lifts himself up so you're face to face. 

"I love you," you say, because he'd said it twice. 

His smile is gentle, eyes creased with a loving amusement. "I know." Steve steals back one of his arms so he can thumb under your eye. "I know you're not sleeping." 

"Steve-" 

"No, listen. I know you don't trust Robin-" 

"I do-" 

"You don't, and it's okay." He cups your cheek. "It's okay. You know, Hopper said it wouldn’t take long to find us a room. A couple more days and you won’t have to worry. And you know I wouldn’t let anything happen to you.”

“I know,” you say, voice softening to match his own. 

He squeezes your cheek. “There’s a lot of stuff I should say to you and I’m kind of trying to hang onto my last shred of dignity here, but I mean it. More than I’ve ever- More than anyone. I love you.”

Your lips fall into a self-pitying pout. You won’t cry, though you feel like you could, because this is possibly the happiest you’ve ever been in your life. Steve loves you more than anyone, plain as day. He wouldn’t say that if he were going to swap you out for a new apocalypse girlfriend anytime soon, ‘cause Steve doesn’t mess with feelings. He’s earnest. 

“Ever since we got here, I’ve been waiting for you to break up with me,” you say. 

Which is funny in itself. You and Steve kissed each other every now and then for weeks before you had the conversation — it feels juvenile to think of boyfriends and girlfriends in life or death, and, paradoxically, it feels really important. The label means a lot to you. The ‘I love you’ means the world, even if he’s been showing it everyday since he met you. 

He makes a sound that’s a combination of a scoff, a snort, and a pitying sigh. “You’re ridiculous,” he says. 

You laugh so loudly it surprises you both. “I’m ridiculous? Get off of me, rich boy.”

Steve hunkers down. “What? No way. I live here now.”

“Seriously, Harrington, get off. I'm sick of you. Robin promised she’d find me a new boyfriend. Maybe I’ll get one with compassion.”

He laughs. He’s trying not to, and it comes out warm and soft to spite him. “Fine, let’s break up.”

“Fine.”

He tilts his head toward yours until your foreheads are touching, staring into your eyes. It takes a lot of willpower to hold in your laugh. “Wanna go on a date with me?”

You lift your chin and kiss him through giggles. “Yeah, okay. Options are pretty limited here, anyway.”

[selodka-pod-shuboy]

Statement regarding a possible Lonely encounter I had today.

So I live on the coast, and after work, I use the bus to get home

Today, when walking to the station, I saw a very thick mist coming from above the mountains, mixing up with the clouds above. I thought: "Well, that's unexpected, but not strange'

And so I get to the bus stop, and after some waiting, get on the thing. Just to clarify: I start working really early in the morning, so i usually get to work by train, due to it being dark anyway, and the tickets are cheaper. During the day, on the other hand, the inconsistent timing of my shift end means that I tend to miss the train and go for the bus. It's a little bit pricier, but i get to see the coast, because the road goes along the side of the mountain, and the sea just seems so infinite and pretty... I get to sit all by myself, tired and satisfyed with my day, and listen to whatever music I currently fuss over. And so I'm on the bus, as usual, enjoying the view, right?

But after a couple of minutes guess what I see? We've just left the city I work at, and there is a ship. Not in the nearby harbor, nor moving anywhere. A ship, big and dark and it was not there in the morning, and it is absolutely SWALLOWED by the mist, and you don't get fog just covering the water like this, or at least I have never seen that before.

So by that point my thoughts are already a mixture of "What the fuuuuuk" and "Oi, Peter". As if it wasn't weird enough, the bus, even though stuffed to the brim with people was too quiet, and the ticket lady wasn't in sight, even though she is always really quick to get to you.

And for some context: I have only been living here for a couple of months, so I'm still in the process of beating the language barrier. I have progress, but I'm not that good still. And when I use public transport, I always think, of how nice it would be to understand , what the people next to me are laughing about (I'm not an eavesdropper, it's just the shit you hear sometimes is wild). And I just feel so disconnected to them. And utterly alone... Well, all that combined, you can't blame me for seeing it as one big TMA statement material

The bus went like this for about 3 minutes, right until we made a sharp turn to the other side of the mountain, where my home city began, which lead to the ship going out of the sight.

The fog was still there, but it looked a lot more like a normal stuff you get before the rain. As well as, before I knew it, the ticket-lady was in my face, and i reached for the change in my pocket.

Not that it matters, but right before my stop, the driver unexpectedly slowed down, causing all the people standing to half-trip (me among them). In that moment, everyone almost... Sorta woke up? Like, you didn't notice it before, but everyone were suddenly chatting and complaining and that just wasn't there before.

So, guys, what do we think, was this a genuine Lonely encounter, or do I just see a TMA reference everywhere nowdays?

[becauseicantthinkwritings]

Teeth

Part 13

Masterlist

Warnings: Stalker vibes, confrontations, anxiety.

Photo by shaazjung on Instagram

"There's something you haven't explained to me." Billy says suddenly.

You pause, from sending your messages, looking across at him from your spot in the passenger seat.

You raise your eyebrows expectantly.

"Why do you think hackers- or people trying to breach security in general- would underestimate the level of sophistication of the system?"

You take a deep breath, lean back.

"Because," You say with a tired sigh, "When they search up the company structure, they'll see me as a consultant."

"You?"

"Female." You clarify.

"You really think that people will make that assumption?"

"Why not? It's been happening for most of my life anyway, I'm just weaponising it now."

He's silent for a long moment.

"I'm sorry that you have to go through that."

"It's fine," You sing, "It means I get to design a system that looks dumb but ruins some fucker's life."

He smiles fondly, glancing over at you.

"Come over to my place next week, I'll do the cooking this time."

You hum, prolonging your response so that it seems like you take some time to decide.

In reality, saying no was never an option.

"Sure, I'd like that."

You don't notice the way his shoulders drop subtly, relaxing, just moments after.

.

It's not as difficult to leave your place alone as it was before.

Sure, for those first few weeks after the robbery, you'd only gone to and from work with Billy and occasionally, one of your friends would accompany you to the supermarket.

Today, when Amy calls to find out of you're still on for later, you pause, and tell her that maybe you're going to try to go by yourself today.

She's quiet for a moment, and you can almost hear her thinking.

"Okay, but please call if you feel even a little bit unsure?" You can hear the worry in her voice, you know that she's thinking about the first time she accompanied you, and you hid in the bathroom for ten minutes cause you thought you were being followed.

"I will, Amy, thank you."

Truthfully, you could never shake the feeling that you were being watched.

It went with you everywhere, like a shadow that just kept coming back no matter how much light you shined on it.

You tried to take deep breaths, and reassure yourself that everything was okay. It was the best you could do.

Billy was the only person that made you feel completely safe, his knowledge and background meant that you could very much trust whenever he said you weren't being followed.

But now? Alone like this, you try not to look over your shoulder too many times when examining apples, or not to freeze up when someone got too close to you.

Overall, at the cashier, you find yourself a little glad that you're able to at least get this far despite anything that may happen later.

It's a step in the right direction for your self-empowerment, a reminder that time can sometimes help repair the damage caused by traumatic events.

You're piling your groceries into the trunk of your car when you hear someone say your name.

Freezing in fear is a normal response for you, but once again, you do your best to breathe through it, and turn.

"Andrew? Hello," you greet.

Your former boss gives you a sharp smile and approaches. You take your time, assessing him as a possible threat.

He looks a bit sallow, the underneath of his eyes are a little grey, possibly with lack of sleep, a shadow of a beard sprouting on the base of his face.

He looks a bit unkempt, his hands in his pockets and you make sure to casually put your trolley between him and you for safety.

"You look like you're doing great." He says, taking in your piles of items, and then carefully looking at you.

You watch his eyes trail down your body and your head lights up with warning signs.

You smile politely, nodding your head.

"I'm fine, I hope you are too." You offer lightly, trying to finish packing your car as quickly as possible.

"Well, when you left, the everyone was counting on Anvil to accept our offer. When he declined, the board decided I wasn't good enough at my job."

You swallow. Is that was this was? A guilt trip?

"I'm sorry to hear that." You state calmly.

He takes a shaky step forward, and you stand your ground looking right at him. You think if he tried something, the shopping cart would come in handy in keeping him away from you.

"It's odd though, I keep playing my last meeting with Russo over and over in my head, and do you know what stood out to me?"

You don't respond.

"What stood out," he continues, "Is that Russo only wanted you."

So this was an accusation.

"Now why would he want someone like you, if you weren't fucking him?"

You press your teeth together angrily.

"Fuck. You." You grit out.

He blinks, having never seen you this angry before. You continue before he has the chance to speak.

"You think I wanted to leave? I left because you kept treating me like shit. Over and over again, and now you think you can come here and accuse me of this? No wonder you got fired when I left, because you couldn't keep taking credit for my work."

"You little bitch." He says taking another step forward until his body is right against the shopping cart. He grips the metal side of it, leaning forward even more in an attempt to get into your space.

"I vouched for you so many times. I'm the reason you got this job in the first place. You were nobody, nothing, until I decided to give you a chance. I've been watching you for a week now, trying to get you alone to talk to you, and you've been hooked to William Russo like dirt under his boot, and you want to tell me you aren't fucking him?"

You feel the fear of realization sink under your skin. Your stomach turns, making you nauseated.

"You've been following me?" You ask, in a much smaller voice than you want to.

He frowns, pushes away from the trolley and turns his back to you for a moment.

"Don't flatter yourself, I only wanted to talk."

He grits out.

You don't say anything, just watching his figure, trying to figure out how to get away from him.

You close your trunk, he watches you return your cart to the little docking station nearby.

"I'm sorry for the way things turned out." You say to him finally, trying to ease the tension.

He studies you for a long moment.

"You can fix this. Bring Russo back to us, they'll take you back, you can vouch for me like I once vouched for you."

"I'm not going to do that."

He grunts angrily, taking steps to approach you.

You back away, but he just keeps coming, he's almost in your personal space when suddenly a hand claps down on his shoulder.

The parking lot security guard looks very stern as he pulls Andrew a safe distance away from you.

"Is this man bothering you?" The security inquires in your direction.

You gulp, thinking that if you said 'yes,' you'd be forced to stand around here for longer.

"A bit, but I just want to leave." You finally say.

The guard nods, standing as a wall between Andrew and you, and you take the out, sliding into your car as fast as you can and reversing out of your park.

You don't look back.

.

'I don't suppose you could spare a moment to come over?' You send in his direction.

You swallow, turning your phone over in your hands, deep in thought.

You phone vibrates, you glance down.

'Be there in 5.'

"It's open." You say, when you hear a knock on the door.

He comes through slowly, no harsh sounds ever present when he's around.

"I know this building is safe, but you really should check before you let people in. What if that wasn't me?"

You don't answer, just staring at him as he locks the door behind him.

You sigh, your feet tucked under you as you lounge on your couch, your third glass of wine cupped securely in your hands.

You look up when he says your name.

You study him the same way he studies you. His hair is wet from a recent shower, but he's dressed comfortably this time, in black sweatpants and a soft green hoodie. He looks so comfortable, and the words 'boyfriend material' spring to mind, your mouth twitches, deep in thought, thinking about what he would say if you said that to him.

"Are you alright?" He asks after studying you.

You nod, taking another long sip of wine. He looks behind you, probably noting the abundance of unpacked groceries on your kitchen counter. You'd brought most of them up, only really worrying about the frozen and refrigerated items before you'd stopped, in favour of the sweet white you were now holding.

"Sometimes, I really hate the field I chose."

Billy looks at you for a moment, trying to read into you, but you know he doesn't have all the information.

"Why?" He asks, stepping forward and dropping into the spot beside you easily.

You rest your cheek on the back of the couch, looking up at him.

"It would be easier. I could have picked the culinary arts instead of this and no one would question if I was sleeping with my boss everytime I did something good."

"Someone accused you of that?" Billy asks evenly, doesn't take his eyes off of you.

You sigh, nodding, swirling your wine around in your little cup- not using a piece of glassware out of fear that you may break it.

"Andrew," You say softly to Billy, despair heavy in the farthes reaches of your mind.

"He followed me, confronted me, accused me, and then tried to bargain with me to come back."

You sigh, sniffling for a brief moment, fighting the pressure behind your eyes as tears pool.

You blink quickly to stop them from falling.

"He told me that I would be nothing without him. And all the way home I kept thinking that if I'd just picked something else, anything else, I might be a little bit happier."

A teardrop splashes into your wine, you wipe at it quickly.

He lets out a slow breath and you glance up at him in surprise, half realising that he's still here, watching you.

His dark eyes are tender, studying you in great detail before lifting a hand and crooking two fingers at you.

"Come here." Is all he says.

You breathe out a rush of air, knocking back the last two moutfuls of wine in your cup before setting the item on the little table in front of you.

You move slowly, giving him a chance to change his mind, leaning into him, and slowly resting your head into the crook of his neck.

His arms wrap around you, pulling you even closer until you're half seated in his lap.

There's just a rightness to being in his arms that finally breaks the dam inside of you. You let out a little sob, and his arms tighten around you as your body begins to shake as you cry.

"Sorry," you hiccup, "I- I'm sorry."

He shushes you softly, his cheek resting on the top of your head.

You feel small in his arms, a fragile thing made to be picked up and cared for and he very sensation makes you cry harder because it feels good, and you find yourself unable to gather the strength to think about pulling away from him. His scent is around you, his body pressed so tightly to yours that there's no gap between you.

There's a small abstract moment in your head, that you're able to identify a wholeness that wasn't there before.

You shiver, looking up at him with tear-stained cheeks, noting the feeling that you'd never realised you were missing something until he took you into his arms.

His thumbs wipe at your fresh tears, pushing them back, forcing them away.

You press your head back against his chest, shudders out a sigh as his arms go right back around you.

"There's so much I want to say," Billy starts, "I don't even know where too begin."

You sniffle.

"You don't have to." You murmur, hoping that he doesn't feel obligated to comfort you with his words.

You feel your head begin to swim as your third glass of wine begins to catch up to you.

"When I started Anvil, I had nothing." He says, his voice smooth and deep in your ear.

"There was me, and an idea, and I made a lot of questionable deals in order to get my company started."

You hear him swallow.

"There was one man, he believed that because he gave me a chance when no one else would, that he owned me. He treated me like his own personal dog, and for a couple of years, all I did was whatever he asked."

You listen intently, melting into him as he begins to rub circles into your lower back.

"It took me a while- longer than I'd care to admit- to understand that just because he helped me, it didn't mean I owed him everything. Sure, his generosity was appreciated, but it was my work that took Anvil off the ground, and seeing how far it's come, how far it has yet to go, and how much good it does makes it worthwhile for me."

He takes a moment to catch his breath.

"What I'm saying is, that you don't owe anyone a damn thing. Your successes are your own, because you did them." He makes a little sound of amusement at the back of his throat before continuing, "You're the secret ingredient."

You sniffle, smiling at his words.

"Andrew thinks he gave you these opportunities out of the goodness of his heart, but that's bullshit. You showed him who you were, and he picked you because he thought you were good at your job."

"And you?" You ask, desperate to hear it, "Why did you pick me?"

He makes a tiny huff of amusement.

"Because I love my company," You feel his face press into your hair, "And I wanted to give it the best chance, which is you."

You sigh, pressing yourself as close to him as possible, breathing in that amazing spiced scent, before relaxing fully, turning to a boneless mass in his arms.

"Thank you." You finally say to him.

He makes a deep sound in the back of his throat, you feel the vibration against your cheek.

He doesn't let go, and you have to motivation to pull away.

You're so at ease that you can't help closing your eyes, falling asleep in his arms without a second thought.

.

He holds you for a long while, a stupid smile on his face as he breathes in your strawberry scent.

When he's sure he won't wake you, he slips a hand under your knees, and stands with you in his arms.

You make a little sound, your arms wrapping tighter around his neck.

Billy takes his time, walking you to your bedroom, pulling the covers back and placing you down.

You don't let go of him, clinging like a koala, his eyes widen as you almost pull all of his body weight on top of yourself, he catches his weight on his arms before he crushes you.

He tries to pull away but you're not having it, maneuvering him in your sleep, until he's on his back, and your body is cradled against his, your head on his chest.

He lets out a breath of amusement, raising the hand that isn't pinned under you to stroke you hair.

He hears you hum in bliss and he smiles.

He wants to worship you so badly, kiss every inch of your skin, and then twice over for good measure.

He can't help it, pressing his thumb over the pout of your lips, his heart flipping when you draw even closer to him.

How can he pull himself away from you now? What kind of strength would that take?

Billy thinks about what would happen if he stayed right here beside you, if you wake up in the morning and find him here, you'd probably be so at ease.

He wanted that, he would probably kiss you at some point.

He can feel his heart racing as he thinks about it, kissing you breathless, giving you rounds of uninhibited pleasure, hearing you beg for him as if he would ever deny you.

But what about after?

He swallows, worried about after.

He wouldn't be able to keep himself away from you. Once, would never be enough.

He'd have to have you, over and over and over, never wanting to hide your relationship.

But that would make rumors true, it would invalidate your successes because you were sleeping with your boss.

The breath that escapes him is so pained that it takes him a second to take another.

He'd never forgive himself if he ruined your reputation that way.

He sighs, tracing the back of his hand over your cheeks and listening to the way you sigh.

He knew what you wanted, your body made it crystal clear everytime he was around you, calling out for him, and if he were a weaker man, he'd oblige.

His relationship with control was strained on a good day. The military had helped him focus his anger, train his rage and his bloodlust, but nothing had trained him to control his desire.

As Billy looked at you, sleeping in his arms, he felt his control grinding down with each breath you took.

It was only a matter of time.

.

Alone.

Again.

You sit up, taking a sad breath.

How did he always manage to slip away from you? Why?

What would it take to wake up next to him?

A question that goes unanswered.

In your kitchen, you're stunned to find that all your groceries have been packed away, only a few items in unfamiliar places. A warm feeling in your chest, you almost want to text him and thank him, except that you remember the last time you did that he left you on read. You decide to tell him in person when he's taking you to work.

You get dressed for work like usual, but when you're halfway ready, you pause, thinking about Dani's words from a few days ago.

In an effort to torment him, you shed your fancy work shirt and grab one of the work appropriate dresses in your closet.

It's sky blue, with half sleeves and matching belt. You're not sure if it will even catch his eye, but you decide to try anyway.

Except that when you step out of your aparment building, it's not Billy waiting for you.

You've seen Sergei around before, but you blink in surprise when he nods his head at you, and pulls open the back door of the car he's standing in front of.

Your heart plummets.

He'd sent someone else to pick you up.

You smile at Sergei, asking him for a moment before you pull your phone from your pocket and dial his number.

"Russo." Is what he says when he answers.

"Hey," You greet lightly, trying to be quick, "Did you send someone else to take me to work?"

He's silent for a moment.

"Yes, I-"

"Okay thank you," you interrupt, not interested in hearing what he had to say, "Just checking to make sure. Bye."

You end the call, staring at your phone for a second before shaking your head.

You turn to Sergei, giving him a smile and a word of thanks as you slide into the back seat of the car.

"Do you have any music preferences?" He asks kindly, and you wonder briefly if that was even in the scope of his job.

"Anything is good with me." You respond, crossing your arms and looking out the window angrily as he begins to drive.

You have many hindsight realisations on your way to work, that you really could have driven yourself. The only reason you were okay with Billy taking you is because he was going in the same direction anyway.

This just seemed like way too much time and effort to get you to work.

You try to make excuses for Billy, like maybe something urgent happened at work, or something personal, you didn't really know every aspect of his life now did you?

But you knew in the back of your head, that this was something he always does. He gets close, gives you blissful peace, and then pulls away, ignores you for a few days.

Frankly, you've hit your boiling point, and by the time you get to work, you're fuming.

You drop your things on your desk, and you give your coworker a big smile when she compliments your dress.

You'd worn it for him. Pathetic.

You make it up to his office, smiling at Katerina, his secretary, asking her if he's available and waiting for a yes before you knock on his door and enter when he says.

He doesn't even look up at you.

Taking notes at his desk, and there's just so much anger inside of you that you're not really thinking straight.

"Is there something you need?" He asks flatly, still not sparing you a single glance.

So he knows it's me, you think, and yet somehow he refuses to look up.

It cuts like betrayal.

"I can drive myself to work from now on, thank you."

He pauses, finally, looking up at you.

You watch him swallow.

"I insist, really, it's safer this way." He says.

"But inefficient," you counter, "To have Sergei go out of his way no doubt, when I have a perfectly good car."

He looks like he wants to argue, but can't form the right words.

He stands, eyebrows drawn, coming to stand in front of you.

It's probably a bad idea on his part, given your warped headspace, your eyes drop to his lips for a brief moment, before going back up to his dark eyes when he speaks.

"Very well, if you insist on driving, it's your choice."

You nod sharply, your throat closing up in despair. Was this the end of your friendship?

"Good." You say, no emotion in your tone, "One more thing."

"Yes?" He asks.

You swallow, grabbing the knot of his tie and pulling him down a little, while simultaneously rising onto your toes.

You don't give it a second thought, pressing your mouth to his.

It's like fireworks going off in your head, sparks spilling over and scattering into the farthest reaches of your mind.

You let out a little sigh of bliss into his mouth before releasing your grip on his tie.

You pull back from his mouth, taking a deep breath to apologise when suddenly his hands are on your hips. You feel the way his fingers twitch, as if he's fighting something bigger than you.

You gasp as he pulls you closer, body pressed tightly to his and you look up into his eyes.

He angles his head down, and his mouth is on yours once more.

He returns the kiss this time, with eager hums and steady pressure. It's greater than any other kiss you've ever experienced.

Your chest feels warm, your stomach flips, sizzling sparks work their way over your skin.

Your hands grip his shoulders, snaking their way up behind his neck.

He groans, hot breath into your parted mouth and you accept the sound greedily, more desperate for him than ever before.

He turns you, presses you up against his desk, braces his arms on either side of you for a moment before his hand cups the back of your neck securely.

It's all consuming, the way his mouth moves this way and that, the friction of his beard on your chin the taste of his mouth threatening to undo you.

His blunted fingers pressing tight into your skin, his hands wander your body, reaching for your knee, raising it to wrap around his hip. Your clothed center just barely brushes a hint of stiffness at the front of his pants and all you're thinking in various levels of enthusiasm is 'yes.'

The loud pitch of his ringing phone startles you. You shove him away quickly in surprise, gasping as you slide from your spot between him and his desk.

Your body is hot, cunt throbbing, skin hypersensitive and aching for his hands.

You suck in a big breath, smoothing your hair over in a panicked frenzy and running your hands down your dress.

Oh God.

Oh God.

Had you really just did that? Kissed him when you'd come in here to tell him off?

You try to take another measured breath but Billy seems to have taken all the air in the room with just one touch of his lips.

.

"Russo." Billy says, leaning over the desk, putting his phone on loudspeaker.

"Apologies for interrupting, but Miss Meachum is here and demanding to meet."

Billy huffs, of course he'd be interrupted by a Meachum. The entire family never understood boundaries.

He looks over at you, facing the windows, taking deep breaths and looking more and more flustered by the second.

"Tell her I'll be with her shortly." He says, hanging up right after.

He studies you, the ripe scent of your arousal filling the air. The panther tears at him, to sit you on his desk and follow through with exactly what he was about to do.

When he resists, the beast plants images of you writhing in pleasure as he licks your strawberry sweet cunt. His cock is half-hard, growing more erect with each second his mind replays what it was like to finally have your soft lips on his.

He swallows, opens his mouth to speak.

You beat him to it.

"I'll drive myself to work from now on." You utter harshly.

He watches in disbelief, mouth parted, as you head to the door, opening it and stepping out without so much as a glance at him.

It's all he needs to realize how much he's fucked up.

.

.

.

A/N: sorry 😞

[sephirthoughts]

Vincent Got a Phone Ch. 4

YES I'M STILL WRITING THIS IT BRINGS ME JOY

Vincent got a phone and then Aerith adopted him as her friend, and all kinds of other shit started happening and he's very tired.

ships: valenwind, background sefikura, background aerti

rating: not explicit yet but it will be

Chapter 4: Vincent is Quite Literally a Boomer

“Vincent! Come on!” Aerith said, banging on his hotel room door. “You’ve been in there for three days, you can’t keep hiding forever!”

Her phone vibrated just then, and she paused her onslaught to dig it out of her skirt pocket.

VValentine: i am not hiding.

VValentine: now please stop shouting and go away, before anyone realizes i’m in here.

✿FlowerGal✿: no way! i’m not going anywhere! in fact i’m gonna yell even louder!

“Vin! Cent! Let! Me! In!” she bellowed, punctuating each word with a heavy thump on the door. “Vincent! Valentine! Let! Me—”

Her phone vibrated again.

VValentine: you said you wanted me to come out. if you wanted to come in, you should have clarified. the door is not locked

✿FlowerGal✿: …

After putting her phone away and taking some deep, meditative breaths, to prevent herself committing an act of violence, Aerith opened the door and entered Vincent’s room.

The rooms at this hotel were all different, so it wasn’t much like her own, which had more of a country-cottage aesthetic. This one was like an old library, with dark wood paneling and a well-worn leather easy chair, as well as a shelf of old books, and a small, ornate table with a reading lamp.

The large bed was of the antique, four-poster variety, with a burgundy damask comforter. It was a very lovely piece of furniture. The problem was that it was immaculately made, like it had never been touched, and Vincent was nowhere in sight.

“Um…Vincent? Where are you?” Aerith said, as the door swung closed behind her, with an ominous creaking sound.

The curtains were drawn, so the room fell into pitch darkness, till she flipped the light switch, and the incongruently modern overhead lights lit the place up like midday. She heard a muffled groan, from somewhere near her feet.

“Too bright!” Vincent’s voice complained. “Turn it back off!”

“Oh, there you are!” she laughed. Getting down on her stomach, she lay on the floor, facing the bed. Vincent was lying underneath, with his arms crossed sullenly on his chest. “Your room is really great. Love the vampire ambience.”

“Cid chose it for me, when he assigned the rooms.”

“He did well. It’s perfect for you. So…you want to tell me what you’re doing playing monster under the bed?”

“I am not playing. This is where I sleep,” Vincent glowered. “I’m also avoiding human contact, and you know that. Why do you persist in coming here?”

Aerith reached under the bed and poked his arm. “We’re friends, Vincent. This is what friends do for each other. When they see a friend who’s depressed and isolating, they pester them until they feel better.”

“Cid hasn’t come to pester me,” Vincent muttered, scowling up into the box-spring.

“He might be avoiding you, because he thinks seeing him would make you uncomfortable, right now. Didn’t he act super weird about it, that night?”

“No,” Vincent sighed, rubbing his eyes with the heels of his hands. “He’s not the one who was weird. I’m the one who was weird and ruined everything. He had every right to be upset.”

“Ok, Vincent, you’re an old man, so you probably don’t know these things, but you shouldn’t equate your queerness with weirdness. ‘Queer’ and ‘weird’ are not the same thing.”

“‘Queer’ and ‘weird’ are synonyms, Aerith,” Vincent replied patiently. “They are quite literally the same thing.”

“Not anymore, they’re not. I mean, the dictionary definition didn’t change, but queer is way more commonly used to mean gay, now.”

Vincent looked at her like she was deranged. “Gay means cheerful. Are you flashlighting me?”

“Am I what? Oh—gaslighting! No, I’m not gaslighting you. Terms evolve to mean different things, all the time. I’m just trying to tell you not to equate your homosexuality with weirdness.”

“Homosexuality?” Vincent said, taken aback. “But I’m not homosexual. Or, what did you say young people call it, now? Cheerful?”

“Gay. And queer. Queer is more of an umbrella, though.”

Vincent was utterly bewildered. “Umbrellas are gay?”

“Yep. But, why do you say you’re not gay? Are you uncomfortable with the label?”

“I say it because I’m not. I have been seriously attached to one person, before Cid. She was a woman.”

“Oh, got it. You’re bisexual.”

“I don’t know what bisexual means.”

“It means you’re equally attracted to people who present as male and people who present as female. You’ve been into one woman and one man. Fifty-fifty is about as clearly bisexual as it gets.”

“I suppose I am bisexual, then,” Vincent replied dourly. “I wish it sounded less vulgar. I think I prefer queer.”

“Whatever makes you most comfortable. Anyway, what I’ve been trying to say is, you’re not weird for being queer. If Mr. Highwind can’t accept you the way you are, then he doesn’t deserve your friendship, in the first place.”

Vincent sighed heavily. “He didn’t say he couldn’t, he just said he needed time. For which I don’t fault him. It must be startling to have a trusted friend, who he thought he knew well, suddenly announce that they feel entirely differently about the friendship than he does.”

“Mm, maybe,” Aerith said, tapping her lip thoughtfully. “I just can’t figure it out, though. My detection system has never been wrong, before. I would swear on a stack of yaoi that Mr. Highwind was under the umbrella.”

“You think Cid seems gay?” Vincent frowned. “He’s so rugged and masculine, though.”

Aerith groaned, covering her face with her hands. “Ugh, Vincent, can you try not to be from the 1950s for like, one second?”

“No, I cant. That is when I was born.”

“I didn’t mean literally, I meant don’t perpetuate outdated stereotypes, like equating queerness with levels of perceived masculinity. Lesbians aren’t manly, and gays aren’t feminine. Unless they are. In which case, it’s because that’s how they are as individuals, and not because they’re queer.”

“I don’t think of lesbians as manly,” Vincent said, indignantly. “You’re not manly, at all. You’re the most feminine young lady I know.”

Aerith stared at him, wide-eyed, with her mouth hanging open. “You…how did you know I’m—”

“Twelve days ago, when I confronted you in the area between the hotel buildings, you said, and I quote, ‘Even if I swung that way, you’re like a million years too old for me, yuck.’ And then you stuck out your tongue, as if the idea disgusted you.”

“Whoa. I can’t believe you both noticed and remembered that.”

“I have a near-perfect memory. But even if I hadn’t noticed that statement, your very obvious feelings for Ms. Lockhart would have alerted me.”

Aerith stared at him, wide-eyed, with her mouth hanging open, part II. “It’s not…that obvious. Is it?”

“It is to me, but I can hear your heartbeat and sense fluctuations in your hormones. I don’t think most humans can do that.”

“Well, congratulations, you’re the first person I’m out to,” she laughed. “But don’t tell anyone else, ok? I’m not out to the group.”

“Out?”

“Good lord, grampa. I’m gonna get the sisters to whip you up a queer dictionary. It’ll make everything easier. ‘Out’ means having your sexuality known by other people. Though, it’s a bullshit concept, since it implies an assumed heterosexual baseline, that you have to ‘come out’ as not fitting into.”

“That’s ridiculous. Why should anyone assume anything about another person’s sexuality, one way or another? Are people these days so sorely in need of something to occupy their time?”

“Tch. You’re preachin’ to the choir, old man. But I didn’t come here to get you square on the queer lingo. I came to drag you out of your lair into the living world. Cloud wants everyone to meet at the hotel restaurant for dinner, and I think you should come. Cid will be there. It’ll be a good opportunity to test the waters between you, in a casual setting, with other friends as a buffer.”

“I don’t think—”

“Come onnnnnnn. Solidarity, Vincent. If worse comes to worst, at least we can be two sad queers with unrequited crushes, together.”

“That doesn’t sound—”

“Before you decide, be aware that if you don’t come to dinner with me, I will be staying here with you. And singing the entire score of Loveless.”

Vincent narrowed his eyes. “There is no way you know every song from Loveless.”

Aerith narrowed hers back. “Try me.”

Thirty seconds later, the two were stepping out of Vincent’s room, into the balmy, early-evening breeze. At that same moment, Cid also happened to be exiting his room, which was directly across the walk from Vincent’s.

“Evening, Mr. Highwind!” Aerith said cheerfully, not giving him a chance to pretend he hadn’t seen them, which it very much appeared he’d intended to do. “Looks like we’re all headed to dinner. Let’s walk together.”

“Uh. Ha. Evenin’ Ms. Aerith. Evenin’ Vinnie,” Cid said awkwardly, not making eye-contact with either of them. “Sure, I’ll walk with y’all. If ya don’t mind a third wheel.”

“Not at all!” she chirped. “More the merrier.”

The three walked on, Aerith making breezy chit-chat to her stiffly silent companions, for about thirty steps, before she saw Tifa and Yuffie, who’d just come from their own rooms.

“Ti-chan! Yuff! Wait up!” she called out, waving to her friends. “You fellas can keep each other company, right? I’m gonna walk with the ladies.”

With that, Cid and Vincent were left to themselves.

“She’s, uh…energetic,” Cid attempted, casting about for a topic of conversation.

“Yes, very much so,” Vincent answered obliviously.

“Kind of a handful, huh?”

Vincent scowled behind his collar. “You don’t know the half of it. She barged into my room, a little while ago, lectured me for being an old man, and threatened to sing the entire score of Loveless to me, unless I accompanied her to dinner.”

“Hoo boy,” Cid whistled. “There ain’t gonna be any winnin’ with a woman like that. I’ll tell ya from experience, Shera and me got along lots better once I learned to just say yes ma’am and do as I’m told. We’re just roommates, but I figure it’s the same kinda thing with…uh. What d’ya call her, anyway?”

“I call her Aerith. She gave me permission to be less formal, since we’re friends.”

Cid’s eyebrows went up. “Friends? She ok with you sayin’ she’s a friend, still?”

“Why should she not be?” Vincent asked, a bit more defensively than he intended. “Do you think she should be ashamed of me?”

“Ashamed? What the hell you talkin’ about?”

“You know what I mean. Because I—I’m under the…umbrella,” Vincent explained fumblingly, in his agitation. “There’s a…weird umbrella. No. Queer. A queer umbrella.”

“Oh shit, Vinnie, are you havin’ a stroke?” Cid said, stopping him and grabbing his shoulders, to peer concernedly up into his eyes. “What year is it? What’s your full name and birth date?”

“I am not having a stroke,” Vincent said, shying away from the sudden touch. “I was only trying to explain that no one should be ashamed to be my friend, because of the way I am. It is not weird to be queer.”

Cid squinted. “Ain’t those synonyms?”

“Apparently not. At least, not the way young people use them, now.”

“Hm. Only other way I heard people use queer is for LGBTQ stuff.”

“I have no idea what that acronym means,” Vincent said dejectedly.

“Least, I thought that was how people use it,” Cid said to himself, scratching his chin. “Maybe I ain’t in the know, anymore.”

Before he could consider the matter any further, Vincent clenched his fists and blurted out what was on his mind. “Cid, are we really still friends? Or have I ruined things between us?”

“What? Well…of course we’re friends, Vinnie,” Cid said, clearing his throat against a slight waver in his voice. “Uh. So. About that. Sorry I acted like a jackass, the other night. I just never expected to hear ya say somethin’ like that. I guess I never thought of ya as a romantic type. And, to be frank, ya don’t seem like the kinda guy who’d go for…y’know. Someone so much younger.”

Vincent’s face fell. “Oh. You object to the age difference. I hadn’t considered that. I…I understand.”

“Not the age difference, per se. It’s just, when one of ya’s been around and seen some shit, and the other one’s barely outta the nest, there’s uh…an imbalance. Y’know?”

“Barely out of the nest? At what age did you leave home?”

“What, me? What’s that gotta do with anything?”

They had arrived at the hotel restaurant at that point, however, and couldn’t discuss it any further. During the seating shuffle, Aerith was trying to maneuver Vincent and Cid into seats beside one another, and unbeknownst to her, the others were trying to put her and Vincent together.

Vincent became the unwitting tuber in this game of social hot-potato, and wound up in the uncomfortable position of sitting between his two friends, rather than on the end, as he preferred. Tifa sat across from Aerith, with Yuffie in the middle, and Cloud across from Cid. The table was meant to accommodate eight, so there were two empty chairs on the end.

After drinks were ordered, the conversation became general. Cid anxiously downed an old fashioned and was already halfway into a second, before the appetizers even arrived. Vincent’s red wine stood untouched, however, as he had crossed his arms and promptly fallen asleep, as soon as the party were seated.

Cid thought it was strange that he wouldn’t be paying more attention to his girl, but she didn’t seem the least bit concerned with Vincent, either, and was intently focused on her friend across the table. It was like her and Vinnie weren’t even together, Cid thought, as he sucked down the remnants of his third drink and signalled the waitress to bring another.

He usually enjoyed all the lively banter between the young people in their group, but the mood was off today. Everyone seemed kind of tense and on edge, like they were expecting something to happen. Especially Cloud, who was usually so flat in affect, he could be taken for a cardboard standee. 

Or maybe it was just Cid’s imagination. It was taking every bit of his energy to put on a cheerful and supportive face for Vincent and his young lady, and he wasn’t even doing a great job. But how could he be expected to, after he’d been bulldozed by his revelation, the other night? 

He’d called Shera in a near panic, about it, at which she’d laughed for far longer than he thought was strictly necessary, and then said she was glad he finally figured it out. She didn’t have any advice regarding what to do, however, except to commiserate about it being really unfortunate that his first gay crush was on a bisexual guy who already had a girlfriend.

Then there was a whole back and forth where Cid asked why she thought Vinnie was bisexual, not straight, at which she’d laughed even harder, and called her girlfriend over so she could laugh, too. Damned women and their already knowing everything, Cid groused internally, as the waitress delivered his fourth drink. He was getting tipsy at this point, though, so he slowed down and nursed the beverage, while he tuned in to the conversation.

“People can’t control who they love, but if it’s someone they know is bad for them, or might even wind up hurting them, they should come clean to their friends and ask for support,” Tifa was expounding, in response to something someone had said. “I, for one, would be really hurt if a close friend didn’t trust me enough to talk to me about those things.”

“But maybe it’s not about trust,” Aerith put forth. “Maybe it’s just a really complicated situation, and that person isn’t ready to be outed to their friends yet.”

“I guess anything’s possible,” Tifa replied, looking unconvinced. “I’m just saying I think people should rely on their support systems, more. And by that same token, if their support system sees them doing something incredibly stupid, they have a responsibility to say something.”

“And I think everyone should respect each other’s privacy, especially about relationships, until they’re ready to talk about it, in their own way and their own time,” Aerith contended.

Cloud nodded vigorously, at his end of the table.

“Yeah but, if they’re going to be super obvious about it,” Yuffie interposed, “like basically eye-fucking every time they’re in the same room, not to mention running off to be alone together, all the time, they’re kind of making it everyone else’s business.”

“What do you mean, eye-fucking?” Cloud wanted to know. “Intense eye contact can mean all sorts of things. Especially in combat situations.”

Aerith ignored him and leaned around the unconscious Vincent, to look at Cid, who was sucking disconsolately at his drink, through the teeny cocktail straw. “What do you think, Mr. Highwind?”

“Hm? Ya wanna know what I think?” he said, slurring his words a bit. “Well, gather round, cause the old man is gonna tell you kids the way it is. It’s like this. People’s gonna follow their hearts, whether you like it or not. Best ya can do is respect your friends’ choices and not interfere in their shit, where you’re clearly not wanted. Even if they were your best friend, and it hurt that they didn’t come to you with it sooner, cause ya just want ‘em to be happy, no matter what, even if it means ya can’t be their most important person anymore, and you’ll probably die alone in a ditch somewhere.”

There was a beat of baffled silence. 

“Well, you won’t die alone, though. Right, Cid?” Tifa asked. “Isn’t Shera your girlfriend?”

Cid choked on his beverage and actually spit some out. “M—my what? Hell no, she ain’t! Can’t a man and woman be friends and work together and live in the same house without people makin’ wild assumptions? Damn!”

“Once again, I awaken to Cid spitting all over me,” Vincent sighed, dabbing his cloak with a napkin.

“Sorry, Cid, yeesh,” Tifa laughed. “I didn’t mean to offend your delicate sensibilities.”

“I ain’t offended, but I’ll tell ya what. Don’t ever let her hear ya say it, or there’ll be hell to pay.”

Yuffie blinked around at the group, none of whom had reacted to Vincent’s statement. “We’re all just going to move past that?”

Cloud looked at his phone and immediately hopped up from his seat. “Sorry, guys. Excuse me, for a minute.”

“Cloud, damn it! Not this again!” Tifa called after him. “You invited us to dinner, you have to actually eat dinner with us!”

“I’ll be right back. I just have to…go to the bathroom,” he said, as he walked briskly away.

“The bathroom is the opposite direction,” Yuffie said, squinting suspiciously. “What is he up to?”

“Morning, Vincent,” Aerith said sunnily, to the yawning vampire. “Cid ordered you a basket of breadsticks, but I ate most of them, while you were asleep. Also, I drank your wine.”

“You’re welcome to it,” Vincent replied, unconcerned. “I don’t think the wine here is all that good.”

“S—Sephiroth!” Yuffie shouted suddenly, giving everyone a jolt. “Cloud, look out! Sephiroth is right behind you!”

“Wait, wait! Everyone calm down!” Cloud pleaded, holding up his hands, as his friends leapt to their feet and summoned their weapons. “He’s not here to fight! I asked him to come!”

This elicited stunned silence from the group, in which the sound of Cerberus’ hammer clicking back rang out very clearly, followed by Vincent’s deep voice. 

“Care to elaborate?”

the author has something to SEPHIROTH JUMPSCARE

[toyybox]

Spiderwebs #43: Distance

Masterlist

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Jackie crossed his arms and sunk deeper into the car seat. “Your shrink creeps me out.”

 “You’ll get used to it.” Beside him, Heather shifted her grip on the steering wheel. “Tell me everything.”

“He asked me questions. About me. About you. About my circumstances.” He turned towards her. “I tried to make you look good, you know.”

“And… what did you tell him?”

“I told him exactly what I always tell you. I tamed it down a little, I guess.”

The studded lights of the road glittered in her pupils’ reflections. The night cast her face into a murky navy. “How bad, exactly, is your situation? Whatever’s happening with you. I have a right to know. As your—”

“Yeah, yeah, I know, you’re my…” What was she? What were they, to each other? No labels could contain it. “But the situation is fine. I’m fine. I’m doing okay. I’m okay. He just doesn’t get it.”

That didn’t convince her. Her gaze flicked to him for a moment, before returning to the road. Still, she didn’t say anything, to her credit.

He took a deep breath. He let it out. One, two, three. Three, two, one. He was just peachy. There was no need to be tense. “What did he tell you?”

“He told me…” She hesitated, here, swallowed her words. “Callaghan’s a nice man, but…” She paused again. “Well, he told me to give you medication.”

“What sort?”

“Alprazolam and Eszopiclone.”

“Mm. My favorite.”

“Anxiety and insomnia,” she clarified. “He also gave me this card.”

From her pocket, she slipped out some kind of business card between two fingers, then gave it to him. It was too elaborate to look professional—the card was covered in white and gold and flowery embellishments, neat and thin text.

“Mary Callaghan.” He handed the card back; she took it. “His daughter?”

“No, his sister. Don’t know if he has a daughter. He is married.”

“That must have really disappointed you, huh?”

She smacked him on the nose with the card. 

“Okay, okay, sorry.” He grinned instead, pushed the card away until she withdrew her hand. “I'm just saying, I wouldn't mind marrying into money.”

“He’s my professor. He used to be, at least. That would be highly—”

“Unprofessional, yeah, yeah. Whatever.” But the two were close in a platonic sense, clearly, a bond tempered by time and trust and probably a few graves dug. Heather did mention that Callaghan kept on the sour side of the law. Which explained why he took the news of Jackie’s kidnapping without so much as a raised eyebrow. 

He was just like Heather, too. Everything from the note-taking and faux-professionalism. They even spoke like each other. Explained where she got it from, then. Everything that irritated him, he saw mirrored. A double image. Curse all doctors, of all types and kinds, who played with the human psyche and self and soul like it was a goddamn game. He did not appreciate being poked and prodded like a particularly interesting specimen of insect. Heather was, at the very least, around Jackie’s age—he didn’t feel entirely comfortable talking back to a stately old man.

“So,” Jackie began. “Oxford, right?”

“Yes. In England. I lived there for a few years.”

“Wow, England. Did you have fun?”

“Not really. Too much rain.”

He could understand that. And Heather seemed to be tired. So he settled down a bit, and tried to ignore the feeling welling up inside him. As bright and pure as sunshine itself, splitting this bleak night. Someone to listen, to talk to. His worries seemed to be so far away.

“By the way, did he tell you why they’re happening?” he asked.

“The hallucinations.” Heather nodded. “He said it was stress. Whatever that means.”

“Stress.” He stared at the road. Chipping white lines over black, on and on and so on. “I didn’t like how he talked to me. Like… like I’m…”

“Like you’re…” She faltered, briefly. “Less than a person?”

“Exactly! Like I’m your… I don’t know. But I’m a person. I’m… a person.” If he said the words enough, maybe he’d believe them. “You think I’m a person, don’t you?”

There was a long silence. The car’s engine buzzed all around them.

“Yes, Jackie,” she answered at last. “You’re definitely a person. And you’re just as important as anyone else.”

He almost told her to say it again. If she kept repeating it, maybe he’d believe her. “Yeah, I’m not going to let some asshole with a skeleton in his soundproof room get to me. Did you know he apparently just keeps human skeletons around his house? He’s a psychiatrist. Why does he even need skeletons?”

“Well, he is a scientist as well. A scientist of sorts. Kind of. It’s probably… for his research?” 

“Because a corpse tells you so much about the human psyche.”

“Fair point. That doesn’t make a lot of sense. That… is strange, actually.” She paused. “Huh.”

Regardless, that was all behind him. Miles and miles back. Callaghan was just another distant memory, and Jackie was just happy to be going home.

· • —– ٠ ✤ ٠ —– • ·

Taglist:

@theelvishcowgirl @lthrboy @whumpy-wyrms

@yassifiedinformation @creppersfunpalooza

@vidawhump @dont-look-me-in-the-eye

[billysgirllol]

“if you turn your back on me one more time and start walkin’ away while i’m trying to talk to you, you best believe i’ll be grabbin’ you by the hair and bendin’ you over that fuckin’ table right there,” the cowboy hisses through clenched teeth, jaw taut as a combination of annoyance and frustration flashes through his icy hues. his hands, usually so gentle and loving, are itching to get rough and harsh with her now. to grip onto lucy gray’s slim waist and pin her to the nearest surface just to prove his point. instead, he smashes his gun against the counter, his other hand balling up into a fist. “i’m so fuckin’ tired of your games. what’re you tryin’ to do, huh? really wanna watch me go blow his brains out?” his blood has been boiling ever since they left the hob, the memory of some blond flirting with her, getting handsy, probably coaxing a fit of giggles out of her red lips, too, playing on repeat in billy’s mind. “what? you don’t love your new boyfriend enough to make sure he lives to see christmas?”

brows shooting up into her hairline, if he wanted to get her to stop walking... well, that kind of tone just did it. since when did he turn into jesse evans or the plethora of other men she's watched how they talk to women. oh... that made her jaw clench. "what did you just say to me, ᴡɪʟʟɪᴀᴍ ʜᴇɴʀʏ ᴍᴄᴄᴀʀᴛʏ ʙᴏɴɴᴇʏ?" her own object is slammed down next to her feet, clutching her guitar by it's neck. "you'll do WHAT? GRAB my hair?" fury stormed her mind at that and made her want to claw him, she dug her nails into the wood of her guitar instead as her hand tightly clutched it. red lips pursing, trying to force herself to not say the words but they go screaming out of her throat anyway, "no you won't either," the brunette growled, not backing down to the scary anger piercing his eyes, "i ain't playin' no games with you." she firstly clarified, pointing at him, "and if you think i'm tryin' to make you harm someone, you're out of your mind." which was shocking, alarming, scary. all of the above. as he was putting words into her mouth and convincing himself she was doing things on purpose and saying such violent things.

"you're the one chatting it up with alice and irene. not me. what's gotten into you? with all this murder on your mind?" it was alarming because he seemed serious, he didn't just seem mad.. he looked like he was as serious as a heart attack. that thought caused nervousness to curl in her stomach and increase her heart rate. "didn't take you for the violent type, but i guess when anyone gets this disgustin' and soused it'll turn the calmest into an ASSHOLE." she only had a few drinks, she liked the buzz a few gave but that's why she only stuck to a few. she didn't want to get to his state, make an ass of herself and be out of her mind. 𝑙𝑢𝑐𝑦 𝑔𝑟𝑎𝑦 picked up her guitar and walked to the living room with it, pushing by him while hand discreetly slid his gun off the table. didn't trust him with that right now as she slipped it inside her skirt in a secure pocket next to her thigh she sewed onto the top layer of her petticoat underneath her skirt.

he told her not to turn away again but she wasn't going to be some obedient dog. fuck and to hell with what he told– threatened her. she only turned around this time to CLARIFY an answer to begin with, that was the only reason. but now she proceeded to walk away from him, find a spot on the couch and put her guitar on her lap. starting to strum something, hopefully he'll shut up and go away. even if she's still boiling about him saying he'll grab her by her hair. if not, she might have to contemplate hittin' the road. she really hopes she won't have to take off running in the middle of the night. guesses she'll endure it as long as she can, hope he falls asleep, but she's never opposed to running away. flyin' out of here as fast as she came. he was getting this upset for what? just because she felt neglected and decided to chat with a friendly feller, she couldn't help it she just came off flirty to every person she kindly smiled at when it wasn't her intention. she also couldn't stand billy had to get dog drunk at her show, that's strike two that pissed her off. so it'd been refreshin' talking to someone sober. and if he can talk to alice or irene or whoever else, then she can talk to another male. fair was fair, she didn't know who he THOUGHT he was thinkin' he was allowed to get away with it and she wasn't allowed to give him a little bit of payback. she might've been petty for it, but least she wasn't being a double standard hypocrite.

[ybcpatrick]

HC that post!YBC Patrick and Joe both spend an unhealthy amount of time working in the studio to “cope.” Joe notices Patrick has a problem but insists it’s different when he himself does it because it “isn’t as bad.”

i've had both of these asks for almost two calendar years. i am SO fucking sorry about that. i'm gonna group these two together, and i hope this maybe makes up for it. 💖

"How's he doing?" Joe asks as he approaches, voice kept carefully low. Andy sighs, gently closing the door to the studio behind him.

"Patrick's fast asleep at the desk. He wore himself out with his episode earlier." Andy runs his hands over his hair, scraping at the shaven sides, and adds, "I was gonna move them both, but I know Patrick would probably flip out again if I did, so I just saved his work and threw a blanket over him."

"Good idea," Joe murmurs, then pauses. "Wait, both?"

"Pete's in there, too," Andy clarifies. "He passed out on the floor beside Patrick's chair."

Joe winces at that, brows knitting together. "Their backs are gonna kill 'em tomorrow."

"I know, but they're sleeping," Andy emphasizes, "and I'm not sure how long it's been since either of them have gotten more than an hour or two." He throws his hands up in faux surrender, backing away from the door as he says, "I'm not touching them. They can go ahead and hate me tomorrow if they wanna, I don't really care."

Joe elects just to shrug, and they fall into a pensive silence. Staring at the studio door, a familiar itch comes crawling up Joe's back; his fingers twitch where they're shoved into his pockets. He clears his throat softly, and his socks scuff against the carpet as he takes a deliberately-casual step forward.

"Ooookay, well, if they're both out for the night, I'm just gonna pop in quick and grab an acoustic–"

"Joe–"

"–I'll take it to the basement, don't worry, I'll make sure they don't hear me at all–"

"Joe."

"– I just wanna finish off that hook I had going earlier, I think I've almo–"

"Joe."

Joe freezes, fingers barely ghosting over the door handle. When he peers over his shoulder, Andy is already staring back, his tattooed arms crossed over his chest. His grey eyes are nearly black in the dim light of the hallway, and he looks tired. Guilt briefly squeezes its cold fist around Joe's ribs.

"Joe, it's nearly midnight," says Andy. He brings a hand up to rub at the sides of his nose (an old habit from when he still had his glasses he hasn't managed to kick yet), and falls against the opposite wall in defeat. His voice is unbearably soft as he pleads, "Come to sleep?"

And the thing is, Joe wants to.

He really does.

He just...

The thought of not finishing his work makes his stomach roll.

So instead of acquiescing, Joe crosses the hallway, leaning into Andy's space. He traces his fingertips, feather-light, over the ink-dark skin of Andy's forearms. Saccharine-sweet, he whispers, "I just wanna finish the hook. I'll do it quick, record it on my phone so I don't forget it in the morning, and then I'll be right there in bed. Then you can do your weird-ass impression of a spidermonkey-octopus thing while we cuddle like teenagers, or whatever." Joe tilts Andy's chin up to look him in the eye, flashing a reassuring grin at him. "Sound okay?"

Andy stares at Joe for a long moment. His typical silence feels more pronounced here, as his gaze darts all over Joe's face, seemingly searching for something there. That damned itch dances its way up Joe's spine again, leaving the chill of uneasiness in its wake; the corners of Joe's mouth crack like plaster as he forces his expression to stay light.

(He prays to anything for Andy not to notice.)

After another beat, Andy's shoulders slump, and a small smile graces his face. His hands find Joe's with practiced ease, weaving their fingers together tightly. He arches off the wall, using Joe's weight as leverage, and crowds so far into Joe's space that there's hardly anywhere left where they aren't touching.

"Just the hook?" Andy asks, his breath ghosting over Joe's lips as he cranes up, tip-toed, to nuzzle their noses together. Joe makes a small sound of assent, not trusting himself to say anything more as warm relief washes over him. He brings their joined hands up to his mouth and drops a lingering kiss on each of Andy's knuckles, his gaze trained on the way Andy's lashes flutter against his cheeks in response.

Andy's grip on him tightens for just a second, then falls slack as he whispers, "m'kay, go get the guitar. I'll meet you downstairs." At Joe's perplexed look, he adds, "I'm gonna come sit with you 'til you're done." Guilt lances through Joe once more, his eyes blowing wide.

"Dee, you don't have to stay up for me–"

"I don't have to, I want to. I like hearing you work." Andy cuts him off, with a finger against his lips. After a second, he shifts his hand, carefully cradling Joe's cheek. He smiles again, but it's tinged with something else, something that makes Joe's heart ache in his chest. "I just like you."

Sudden heat pricks at Joe's eyes and he quickly snaps them shut, leaning into Andy's touch. That awful itch, along with the guilt, takes a backseat in his brain for the time being, corralled there by the warmth of Andy's hand and the simplicity of his words; for just a moment, he savours it.

Before long, Andy's pulling away, nudging Joe towards the studio door. He gives Joe a stern warning about waking up Pete and Patrick as he walks away, and Joe keeps his eyes locked on Andy's back until he's completely disappeared from sight.

Quiet as a mouse, Joe slips into the studio. As promised, Patrick is bent over the desk, his folded arms shielding his face from view. Pete is sitting slumped beside him on the floor, unflatteringly open-mouthed and folded up like a pretzel. The throw blanket is haphazardly spread out over Patrick's broad shoulders, the edge fluttering mere inches over the crown of Pete's head. Even in sleep, the pair look utterly exhausted; Joe can't help the way he frowns.

He feels them. He's tired, too. Really fucking tired. And so is Andy.

But Joe can't stop yet, and Andy knows that. And Andy is waiting for him in the basement, because he's sweet like that. Because he's thoughtful.

Because Andy gets Joe, perhaps even more than Joe gets Joe, and he understands that Joe can't give it up quite yet.

Carefully, Joe slinks around the sleeping pair, grabbing his acoustic from the loveseat he'd abandoned it on earlier. On his way back out, the telltale whisper of fabric shifting stops Joe dead in his tracks at the door. Heart in his throat and apologies at the ready, he peers over his shoulder at Pete and Patrick.

Patrick has shifted in his sleep. His good arm has fallen into his lap, palm up. His slack hand is close enough to Pete's head that his fingers are tucked, just slightly, into Pete's dark hair. Pete snuffles, a little gross-sounding, and subconsciously leans into the contact.

Neither one stirs again. Watching them for a moment longer, Joe's smile grows a bit wobbly. Drawing in a deep breath, he eases the door shut once more, and leaves them to their slumber. (With any luck, they'll wake up at some point through the night, and at least have the sense to lay down on the furniture or something, but Joe's not counting on it.)

As Joe makes the descent to the basement, slinging the guitar strap over his shoulder on his way, his thoughts become preoccupied once more with the hook from earlier. Perhaps Andy, though sleepy and spent as he is from the day, may have some ideas for how Joe can nail it down.

After all, the sooner he does, and the sooner he satisfies the itch, the sooner Joe can get some rest, too.

He's just gotta finish, first.

[nomoreusername]

Who Are You? (Pt 3)

Paring: Aris x female reader

Summary: You finally escaped the Glade. Everything seems to be going your way. However, that is quickly disrupted when a random boy takes Teresa's place.

It had been days without food, and we were all absolutely drained. We spent a lot of time lying on the floor, a bed, the couch, or anywhere else we could. We had been surviving off of the tapwater Aris despised. That quickly became everyone's best friend.

"I don't even want to play my harmonica,"I mumbled, turning it over. Obviously, nobody knows where it came from. To be honest I don't even know. It just so happened to be in my pocket. The letters AJ were engraved into it. I have no clue why or what it meant. I just know this seemingly useless piece of metal means a lot to me.

Have you thought of anything?

I winced at how loud his voice was. In fact, it almost seemed like he was yelling in my ear.

"Aris, we're already suffering. Please don't give anyone a headache on top of it,"I begged, gaining enough energy to glare at him. To my surprise he seemed absolutely horrified.

"Nobody's yelling,"Minho mumbled.

"Oh. I guess I'm hallucinating then,"I shrugged, confused but too tired to question it.

Y/N?

"What do you want Greenie?"I sighed, now rubbing my head. "Y/N, I think you're about to snap. Do girl's just lose their minds quicker or something?"Frypan asked. "No. Maybe you guys are just going deaf,"I said, putting a pillow over my face. If I tried hard enough I might be able to make myself pass out because I'm sick of this.

"I thought of something. Can you two come help me?"Thomas asked, clear pain and exhaustion in his voice. "Nobody wants to do anything,"I pointed out, my voice muffled through the pillow.

Just come with us.

"Fine,"I groaned, following him and Aris out of the room. To my surprise they walked completely past everyone in the living room until we were all in a tiny corner.

"I don't think this is a good time to jump me,"I joked. Really, I didn't care what actually happened. I just wanted to go to sleep.

"We're going to do something, and you can't panic,"Thomas whispered. "That's reassuring."

"Just trust us,"Aris urged. I slid down the wall and waited for whatever they were about to do.

Can you hear us?

"Of course I can hear you,"I said, looking at the ground. "Look at our faces."

"This is getting weir-"

"Just do it,"Aris pushed. I begrudgingly looked at them.

Do you know which one of us is speaking right now?

"Thomas. How are you doing that?"I asked. He was clearly talking, but his mouth wasn't moving. In fact, his entire face remained the same.

Can you hear my voice too?

"Aris? What is happening?"I questioned, my mind looking for any rational reason for what was going on. So far I was coming up blank.

"This is going to sound a little bit insane,"Thomas warned. I gave him a look that said 'everything going on is insane'.

"No. I mean insane. So you remember how Teresa came up in a coma?"

"Yeah. I pulled her out of the box,"I reminded him. "Okay. Well, she spoke to me while in her coma. Telepathically. The thing is it disappeared when she did. Now he's the one I can talk to telepathically,"He explained.

"So you two are speaking, or thinking, or I don't know what to call it. Just, you two are having conversations with each other inside your heads?"I clarified, trying to wrap my mind around this. So far I wasn't doing a good job. In my defense you wouldn't either.

"Yeah, and for some reason you can hear us,"Aris shrugged. "How great. I was dying to know what interesting conversations you guys would have when you're alone,"I deadpanned. "Do you think you could be able to talk to us?"Thomas asked.

I looked at him like he was an idiot. "Why would I care about that? I'm focused on getting out alive and rescuing Teresa on the way. I don't have time for this stupid sidequest,"I snapped. Partly because I was irritable from going so long without food and partly because it was actually a stupid question.

"If you can hear us it has to be for a reason,"He pushed. "Yeah, and it's one I don't care about. You two can just be all cuddled up now because I don't want any part in whatever this is. For all we know it could be something meant to hurt us. With that being said don't get me caught up in something I don't need to be in. Especially, something that hurts my head."

I finished my rant and went to leave.

Subject A9, Y/N, The Partners Accomplice

"Can you stop that?"I asked, glaring at Aris. "Your name has to mean something. The fact that we randomly matched and now you being involved in the telepathy can't be a coincidence,"He pointed out.

I hate the fact that he had a good point. At the same time I don't know what to believe anymore. I don't know what's real and what isn't. If I'm being honest the thing that scared me most wasn't the tags, or the not having food, or even being stuck here. It was the thought that this place wasn't a physical place. The thought that I may be going insane was worse than anything else.

"Fine. Give me an idea of what's happening,"I responded, accepting defeat. Nobody said anything for a minute. Then, Aris seemed to gain a brilliant idea. At least, it was probably brilliant to him.

"We should see if it works for all of us. Like a three way,"Aris suggested. "Please don't ever say that again,"I encouraged, cringing at the sound. He seemed to realize how weird that sentence was as well because he looked extremely embarrassed to even be alive.

"But fine. We may as well see how much I can truly do with all this.

---

Can you still hear us?

"Yes, and I'm already telling you I don't know how to respond,"I groaned, seconds away from slamming my head against the wall. I just pulled out my harmonica and started tossing it up in the air before catching it.

"Where'd you get that?"Aris asked. "My pocket,"I said defensively. "No. Where did you get it in the first place?"

"None of your business."

"Why?"

"Because it's none of your business."

"I know, but"

It's none of your business!

We all froze. I had actually just done that. It wasn't even on purpose.

"I guess I'm caught up in this mess,"I sighed. So much for not getting involved.

[la-tramontana]

I agree, this is the correct interpretation of the situation. Go buy tickets, stream, etc. everything that you're interested in and would normally consume, but when we see the big quality drop in a couple of months, change your consumption according to how you really feel.

More than that: does anyone remember the general mills strike a few years ago? People vocally complained in public on Twitter about the drop in quality of e.g. cornflakes, with supporting photographs, and said that they would not buy the product due to it not being worthwhile anymore. That was extremely effective. It wasn't a boycott, it was a clarification to the company that their strikebreaking tactics were not going unnoticed on the consumer end.

Doing some productive complaining when we feel like it could be helpful.

"Man, those Barbie interviews were so fun, I really wish the studios would come to terms so we could be entertained like that again. The actors are really talented and should be compensated fairly."

"Man, it's too bad that Hollywood is pushing such bad and unreasonable AI policies, it's their fault we're missing Sandman. I'd really love to see that; I'm not so interested in this reality TV stuff."

"Man, I sure love Star Trek and I only got a Paramount+ subscription in order to watch it. I hope they settle with the striking workers' demands soon or I'm gonna have to cancel because there won't be anything to watch."

Make whatever your decisions are here very public. Boost strike content and Tiktoks from your favorite actors whenever you see it. It's less about their bottom line and more publicly showing your allegiance.

Put the responsibility for the strike on the shoulders of the execs and clarify to them that while you want to consume their product--and therefore they should care about your opinion--but that you are invested in a certain level of quality for that product, and want a good contract so that the shit they put out is worth your dollar.

Be aware that it is likely the companies will pay strikebreakers to say the absolute worst shit about the strike and the strikers in order to break morale and make it sound like it's coming from People Like You, their fans. It's very, very, very important to help the union maintain solidarity because holding onto morale is going to become extremely tough at a certain point. That's the point where your vocal enthusiasm for the strike, and potentially some $$$, is going to be critical.

Keep your powder dry. We aren't there yet.

But when that time comes, this isn't just about your faves or an abstract progressive cause. Back the labor movement and down the line it will help you put a dollar in your pocket, even if you have a non-union workplace. Tired of price gouging? Ridiculous scheduling? Low wages?

If we get a strong Teamsters or even railroad strike, stuff is gonna change in this country. But we need to show folks that it's possible and that we're willing to invest in labor. Successful strikes inspire more strikes. Support the long strike, show 'em how it's done, show all the other unions that they can count on the community.

(also, if you're bored, unionize your workplace. It feels like you're the star of a spy movie or a member of the Resistance and is one of the most badass things you could possibly do)

(also also, if that's a bad idea right now... don't you think it's time to make the union organizer AU as mainstream as the coffee shop AU, regency AU, and the high school AU? If you're missing your show and want to support the strike, why not do some detailed research and stretch a little? I promise it's one of the most psychologically interesting and stressful and funny situations you could possibly put your faves in, PLUS you're doing an educational service to the community. Why not??)

I’m curious as to where you all stand

Reblog for demographics!

[roroswitherose]

WHO DO YOU LOVE

SUMMARY: Taeyong is in love with y/n, his best friend since middle school. When his other best friend Doyoung finally meets y/n, Taeyong notices that Doyoung is slowly falling in love with y/n just like he did.

PAIRING(S): Best friend! Taeyong x Female Reader, Doyoung x Female Reader.

GENRE: Angst, Fluff, College AU?, Best friends to lovers, Love triangle.

WARNINGS: swearing, mentions of alcohol, kissing

WORD COUNT: 17,627

read note at the end Plz :D

and tysm for all the love in the master list!!

Taeyong used to think having his two best friends being close would be easier, more fun.

Instead of having to plan dinners without one of them, they could eat together or not having to stress when he plans to go to pottery classes with y/n but forgets that he's supposed to binge watch the new dramas on netflix with doyoung, which has happened to many times already.

But now he's starting to regret trying so hard for them to be friends as he watches doyoung smile and nod his head along to the story y/ns telling him. Tonight is the 4th night they are having dinner as the three of them and Taeyong can't help but feel a little jealous that neither of them has paid that much attention to him especially y/n.

He knew they would get along but not this much, there wasn't even a chance for him to say something from their constant laughs and conversation jumping from one topic to another. y/n's plate was still almost full of dumplings and the food was served to them 20 minutes ago, normally she would be almost done or done even.

“ It happened out of nowhere I honestly felt a little bad but me and taeyong couldn't stop laughing in the back” Y/n laughs taking a sip of her drink smiling when doyoung throws his head back in laughter.

“ Right tae?” y/n smiles softly nudging his leg under the table.

“ Huh? What were you saying? '' Taeyong questions looking up from the dumpling he's been poking with his chopsticks for the past 6 minutes.

“ About that one time you guys were at that pottery class and that lady pressed too hard and her clay flew off the wheel and hit the wall” Doyoung chuckles, shoving a dumpling in his mouth.

Y/n looks over Taeyong's slumped shoulders as he leans back against the red booth seats, a faint frown on his face.

“ You okay?” Y/n questions slightly worried.

“ yeah im okay just a little tired” Taeyong says giving her a fake smile before looking at doyoung who's sitting in front of him.

“ But yeah it was hilarious everyone was so shocked the lady even glared back at me and y/n for laughing so much” Taeyong smiles at the memory.

“ Yeah that sounds fun, That sounds like something that would happen to mark” Doyoung laughs thinking about the look that would be on his and taeyongs friends' face.

“ That is totally something that would happen to mark” Y/n laughs along with him.

“ you know mark” Doyoung questions leaning back in his seat.

“ Yeah i met him like a year ago” Y/n smiles thinking about that time her and taeyong ran into him at a restaurant that they went to, to celebrate her passing her business exam.

“ I feel like i'm the only one of taeyong's friends that you haven't met until a few weeks ago” Doyoung pouts, crossing his arms glaring playfully at taeyong.

“ I haven't met haechan” Y/n clarified hoping to make him feel better.

“ For good reasons” Taeyong teases, just thinking about y/n and haechan being in the same room gives him a headache from how loud they would be.

“ Yeah that's smart” Doyoung jokes while looking at the time on his phone.

“ It's pretty late, I should get home, I have rehearsals tomorrow” Doyoung smiles sadly, hating that he has to leave.

“That's okay i have an early shift tomorrow i should be getting home two” Y/n sighed moving to stand up so doyoung can slide out of the booth.

“ don't worry i got it” Taeyong smiles seeing Doyoung pull out his wallet.

“ Are you sure?” Doyoung questions pulling his keys out of his pocket.

“ Yeah don't worry about it, good luck tomorrow” Taeyong smiles slightly, getting up to hug him goodbye.

“ Thank you, i'll see you guys later” Doyoung smiles, waving them goodbye before walking to the door.

“ ready to go?” Y/n questions making taeyong look away from Doyoung’s disappearing form.

“ Yeah let me go pay real quick,” Teayong nods, patting her arm before walking over to pay. Y/n laughs to herself grabbing his backpack from the seat that he forgot before following after him.

“ Thank you for dinner” Y/n smiles while putting on her seat belt after Taeyong gets in the car.

“ I've been paying for our meals for the past 4 years, you don't have to keep on thanking me” Taeyong chuckles pulling out of the parking lot, turning down the radio that immediately came on.

“ You're such a gentleman” Y/n teases leaning back in the seat looking out the window at the passing cars.

“ I'm glad you finally noticed,” Taeyong smirks, glancing at her.

“ Don't be silly i've always known that you're a gentleman” she promised turning her head to watch him drive, he just glances back at her giving her a smile.

“ I know,” he mumbles. After a few minutes of comfortable silence yln decides to break it.

“ I'm sorry”

“ For what?” Taeyong asks, stopping at the red light turning to look at her.

“ I barely paid any attention to you tonight, I'm sorry” Y/n frowns seeing him turn to look at the red lights.

“ It's okay, doyoung is pretty awesome, it's hard to not pay attention to him, '' Taeyong sighs, squeezing the steering wheel.

“ But youre awesomer to me” Y/n pouts trying not to smile at the weird word.

“ I'm pretty sure that's not a real word” Taeyong laughs, turning to look at her feeling his breath hitch at how pretty she looks with the red light reflecting on her face.

“ You're so awesome I made you your own word” Y/n laughs along with him.

“ Whatever you say” he chuckles, facing the road when the light turns green.

“ See such a gentleman” Y/n teases with a smirk on her face.

“ Sorry i can't hear you over the music” Taeyong smirks, turning up the radio. She just gasps dramatically before looking out the window smiling at the sound of Taeyong singing along to the song but sadly before he could finish singing to the song he was pulling into her apartment complex.

“ We're here” Taeyong says, bringing her out of her thoughts, turning down the music.

“ Noo i wanna hear you sing” y/n pouts looking at him smiling as he looks away in embarrassment.

“ I'll sing to you another time, it's late and you have work in the morning” Taeyong promises.

y/n just sighs loudly taking off her seat belt grabbing her book bag from the back seat.

“ don't remind me” she frowns looking over his face tilting her head in confusion when he takes off his seatbelt to turn off the car.

“ What are you doing?” she interrupts

“ I'm going to walk you to your apartment, '' he says, like it's the most obvious thing.

“ Don't worry about it tae my apartment is right there” she smiles pointing to her apartment that's in eye sight from his car. Taeyong just sighs knowing that she won't back down.

“ Okay, just text me when you get inside” Taeyong nods, causing y/n to giggle and shake her head.

“ you can see me walk inside tho”

“ Y/n please, just do it” Taeyong sighs with a worried look on his face. Y/n smiles and opens her door getting out of the car.

“ Okay i will '' she smiles, closing the door knowing that he's going to roll down the window.

“ get some sleep okay?” Taeyong says loudly looking at her with a worried smile.

“ I will but only if you do” she promises, knowing that he's probably going to stay up for a few more hours.

“ Okay i will” He promises. Y/n smiles, turning to walk to her door, turning around to blow him a kiss, smiling when she hears his laughter from his car before making her way up the stairs and into her apartment after unlocking it.

Taeyong smiles fondly, turning on his car watching as she walks inside safely. Taeyong turns up the radio grinning when he hears y/n's favorite song play. Taeyong waits for a few moments humming along to the song. Taeyong pulls his phone from the cup holder when he hears it goes off , seeing a text from y/n.

y/n <3: i'm inside and safe,drive home safely i'll text you in the morning goodnight tae <333

Taeyong smiles quickly texting her back, putting his phone in the cupholder before driving home singing along to the song on the radio with a grin on his face, the smell of y/ns perfume his favorite smell still in the air.

“ No I disagree, I'm happy they didn't end up together” Y/n argues while looking at the credits of the movie they just finished. Doyoung gasps, turning to look at her with wide eyes.

“ They were meant to be! He left his family's fortune for her” Doyoung says loudly, shoving the popcorn in his mouth.

“ He only left because he saw how happy she was with the other guy! He was selfish and didnt think of her feelings. Then he literally proposed to her in front of her boyfriend after crashing their date!” Y/n complained, shaking her head at the actions of the male lead.

“ He cried while proposing to her, It was romantic!” Doyoung exclaimed, trying to convince the girl.

“ tae please tell your friend that he's wrong” Y/n whines looking up at taeyong who's quietly laughing at their banter about the highly cringy movie they just finished.

“ I..I actually agree with doyoung” he laughed making doyoung laugh loudly while y/n quickly sat up from leaning against his side looking at him in disbelief.

“ Please tell me you're joking” Y/n sassed only making them laugh harder from how serious she got over the movie. Seeing that both of them were still laughing, obviously joking, y/n scoffs playfulling standing up.

“ I'm going to get my ice cream and i'm not sharing” Y/n smirks putting her blanket on taeyongs lap before going to taeyongs kitchen getting her ice cream and 3 spoons knowing that they will want some and that she will end up sharing.

“ What genre do you guys want now? ” Doyoung asks loudly so y/n can hear from the kitchen scrolling through the movies on the tv while taeyong wraps himself up in y/n’s blanket laying his head back.

“ Hmm, maybe action or horror? I don't think I can watch another drama” Y/n smiles walking back into the dimly lit living room where the trio has spent all day watching movies and playing board games.

“ I don't know” Doyoung winces, not liking the sound of a horror movie.

“ Don't be scared doyoung me and taeyong will protect you” Y/n laughs sitting between them crossing her legs stealing back her blanket from taeyong making him pout and look at her side profile while she stares at the tv.

“ That doest make me feel better” Doyoung chuckles, leaning back against the couch. Even though he's against it he still pulls up horror movies.

“ I heard that was a good one” Taeyong yawns pointing at the movie leaning his head on y/n's shoulder.

“ Sounds good to me” Y/n smiles, opening the lid of her ice cream. Doyoung sighs but turns on the movie also leaning his head on y/n's shoulder.

Y/n smiles looking down at both of the boys pulling the 3 spoons out of her hoodie pocket handing them one each.

“ thank you” Taeyong whispers, kissing her cheek. Y/n blushes and leans her head back focusing on the movie that's starting.

It was half way through the movie and both of the boys had wide eyes holding onto y/n's arm in fear at the movie. The ice cream is now melting in the carton on the table. After doyoung almost knocked the ice cream out of her hands at a jump scare y/n decided it was better to have it on the table.

“ taeyong i can't feel my arm” Y/n whispers looking down at her scared best friend who's squeezing her arm tightly watching the screen with wide eyes.

“ Oh I'm sorry” Taeyong says quickly, letting go of her arm slightly, not looking away from the tv.

Y/n smiles and looks over at doyoung who's hiding the bottom half of his face in her blanket also holding onto her arm. It's been 5 months since y/n met doyoung and the three of them were closer than ever, going out to dinner, going to karaoke and having weekly movie nights at taeyongs….She was happy, She was happy that taeyong introduced doyoung to her.

“ Ahhh!” Both Boys shout making y/n flinch and sit up. The sound of them yelling pulled her out of her thoughts.

“ What! What happened” Y/n panicked pausing the movie.

“ Okay i'm done lets watch a different movie” Doyoung begged putting his hand on his chest feeling his fast heartbeat, trying to calm himself from the jumpscare.

“ yeah i agree i would be laughing at doyoung because of his girly scream if i wasn't shaking in fear” Taeyong frowns lifting his hand to show them his shaking hand. Y/n frowns, grabbing his hand to hold, rubbing her thumb over the top.

“ I didn't scream like a girl” Doyoung scoffs glaring at Taeyong who just smirks and lays his head back on y/n's shoulder.

“ You kinda did” Y/n laughs looking at doyoung who pouts and lays back against the couch closing his eyes feeling tired from the long day of watching movies and arguing with taeyong while they play board games.

Y/n smiles and moves his hair out of his eyes, missing the way he blushes at her touch before laying her head on top of taeyongs.

“ Let's make a bed in here and we can finish that animation” taeyong says tiredly thinking about the last sleepover they had,It was the first time the three of them had a sleepover together and they still wanted to watch movies and since the tv in taeyongs room wasn't working they decided to just sleep in the living room instead of sharing his bed.

Y/n was used to sleeping in taeyongs very comfortable bed so she was very excited about the three of them having a sleepover over in the living room.

“ Okay i'll get the blankets you guys move the table” Y/n says excitedly quickly getting off the couch and skipping over to the closet down the hallway that has literally everything in it.

The two boys smile at how happy she got moving the table to the side.

“ y/n” Taeyong whines, grabbing the melted ice cream that leaked a little on the table. Doyoung turns to look at him wondering what the sudden outburst was for and he can't help but laugh seeing the annoyed look on his face as he holds the carton.

Y/n walks quickly into the living room at the sound of her name being called, almost falling over at how heavy the blankets are that she's holding.

y/n pulls the blankets lower down so she can see over them before smiling innocently at her best friend who's staring at her with an annoyed look she almost smirks when she notices the side of his lips lifting up hinting that he's trying not to smile.

“ You made a mess” taeyong whines trying to not smile at how cute she looks holding the several blankets.

y/n huffs putting the blankets on the couch before turning to look at him putting her hands on her hips.

“ It's not my fault, I couldn't get up because you were holding onto me so tightly because you were scared of the movie” Y/n teases.

“ That's just not true” Taeyong scoffed, turning to glare at doyoung who chuckled knowing that it's true.

“ And plus doyoung was the one who took the last bite so he should have put it away” Y/n accused pointing at the smiling boy who's laying down the blankets.

“ Hey don't bring me into this,” Doyoung laughs.

“ It's rule 35! If you take the last bite you have to put it away” y/n sighs pretending to be disappointed at him.

“ How am I supposed to remember 46 rules when you guys haven't even told me all of them? '' Doyoung whines remembering how the two of them told him about rules they have for their friendship that's kept their friendship alive.

“ There's 48” taeyong reminds him.

“ You know what I mean,” Doyoung shouts, annoyed, making the other two laugh.

“ Yes we do,” Taeyong laughs, walking into the kitchen to put away the melted ice cream.

“ Now let's hurry up, I'm tired” Y/n smiles while holding up a blanket.

The trio spends the next 5 minutes making the bed on the floor before they all settle down on the floor.

“ Mmm comfy” Y/n smiles, laying in between them looking at the dark ceiling. The only light is the animation that Taeyong put on.

They end up watching the rest of the 20 minutes of the movie before they decide to turn off the movie to get some sleep.

“ What's rule 47?” Doyoung asks, breaking the silence. Taeyoung tenses up at the question pulling the blanket up to his chin staring at the ceiling.

“ don't fall in love with your best friend” Y/n yawns closing her eyes feeling herself start to drift off.

“ Oh” doyoung whispers to himself thinking about the answer she gave him.

“ Goodnight” Doyoung mumbles, closing his eyes. y/n just hums in response to tired to answer.

Taeyong doesnt answer he just turns around his back facing y/n as he looks into the dark with a frown on his face thinking about the stupid rule him and y/n made in middle school, if only his younger self knew that he would end up falling in love with his best friend and that it would be easier if he never made that stuped rule at all but soon he falls asleep thinking about scenarios if the rule never existed.

y/n groans quietly turning over, opening her eyes and sitting up seeing that it was still dark meaning that it was still night time. Y/n reaches her hand back grabbing her phone off the couch, wincing when the light hits her eyes, sighing when she sees its 2 in the morning.

y/n decides that she should drink some water to cure her dry throat before laying back down.

Y/n frowns in confusion after she sees the doyoung is not laying down. Y/n shrugs it off thinking that he's probably in the bathroom or curing his own dry throat.

She quietly walks into the kitchen carefully so she wont wake Taeyong up from his peaceful sleep.

Y/n sees Doyoung leaning against the counter with his phone and a glass of water in his hands, the light from his phone reflecting onto his tired face. As if he felt her stare he quickly turns to look at her.

“ I'm sorry did i wake you” Doyoung frowns suddenly feeling sorry at the thought of waking her up because he couldn't stop tossing and turning all night because he couldn't stop thinking about her.

“ No you didnt dont worry, I'm just thirsty as well” She smiles tiredly, pouring herself a glass of water carefully so that she doesn't spill, the only light coming from the oven light.

“ Let me guess the scary movie kept you up” Y/n teases taking a sip of the water, leaning against the counter next to him, their shoulders almost touching.

“ Surprisingly it didn't” Doyoung chuckles quietly, chugging the rest of his water before putting the glass in the sink.

“ What about you? Did the movie keep you up” Doyoung wonders.

“ Oh no i was just thirsty and i noticed you weren't next to me” Y/n smiles tiredly rubbing at her eyes.

“ Thank you for inviting me tonight,” Doyoung mumbles, breaking the silence. Even though she can only see half of his face from the light she looks up at him with a smile.

“ No need to thank me, you're always welcome” Y/n smiles hitting his shoulder with hers making him chuckle and cross his arms over his chest.

“ I appreciate it, i just don't want to be messing up you and taeyongs time you know” Doyoung rambles rubbing the back of his neck.

“ don't say that” Y/n starts setting down her glass before moving to stand in front of him.

“ Taeyong wants you here….we both do” Y/n says quietly at the end looking up at him.

“ You do?” Doyoung whispers, standing straight from leaning against the counter, looking down at her. Y/n blushes under his gaze, her hands playing with the ends of taeyongs hoodie she's wearing, nodding her head.

“ Yeah….isn't it a little obvious” Y/n jokes quietly causing doyoung to laugh quietly and lean closer to her.

“ No it is, especially when we're watching movies and you're glancing at me every 3 minutes” Doyoung smirks thinking about the many times he's noticed her looking at him, and he thought he was obvious.

“ That's not true” Y/n whines hitting his arm embarrassed that she's been caught.

“ It's pretty obvious,” Doyoung teases, gently moving a strand of y/n's hair out of her eyes. Y/n eyes widen when he doesn't move his hand from her cheek. Y/ns breath hitching when doyoung leans closer.

“ Can I kiss you?” Doyoung whispers his eyes looking into hers. Y/n nods letting out a small yes closing her eyes when doyoung leans closer closing the gap between them,kissing her gently moving his hand to her hip pulling her closer.

Doyoung pulls away from the kiss resting his forehead on hers. Even though the kiss didn't last long it still left them breathless. Y/n blushes and moves back a little holding the hand that was once on her hip.

“ I'm going to head back to bed” Y/n whispers, squeezing his hand looking up at him to see him smiling.

“ Okay don't wait up for me” Doyoung whispers, letting go of her hand.

“ Are you not coming?”

“ I'll be there in a few minutes i'm just gonna get another glass of water” Doyoung rambles knowing that he's going to need a few moments to himself before he can go back to laying next to her and taeyong suddenly feeling a little guilty about kissing her while taeyong is in the other room sleeping.

“ Okay...Goodnight Doyoung” Y/n smiles before quietly walking into the living room and laying down staring up at the ceiling, her thoughts running wild that she just kissed doyoung well doyoung kissed her. Soon she was falling asleep.

“ Y/n..y/n wake up” Taeyong yawns, shaking her shoulder trying to wake her up.

“ No leave me alone” Y/n groans, pushing his hand away covering her face with the blanket. Taeyong chuckles and pulls the blanket back smiling when he sees her small pout and her hair in her face.

“ Y/nnnn doyoung is making breakfast so id get up if i were you he makes killer pancakes” He says cheerfully moving her hair from her face.

“ I'm gonna kill you if you don't leave me alone” y/n says in a fake cheerful voice opening her eyes to look up at him.

“ I'll make you a plate” Taeyong chuckles, patting her head,making her groan and swat at his hand before he walks into the kitchen.

Y/n sighs and sits up from the makeshift bed grabbing her phone off the couch fighting the urge to scream at taeyong for waking her up so early on a saturday, when it shows that it's 9am.

“ I'm actually serious this time. I'm definitely killing yo-” Y/n starts but cuts herself off as she sees the pancakes and the assorted fruit on the counter when she walks into the kitchen.

“ Hmm nevermind i think doyoung saved you” She smiles shoving a few blueberries in her mouth making doyoung laugh and look back at her from his spot in front of the pancake mix.

Noticing his stare she smiles and looks away moving to help taeyong set up the table, the memories of last night making her feel flustered.

“ So Some of me and doyoung’s friends are having a party tonight. Do you wanna go?” Taeyong asks y/n as they all sit down at the table. Y/n looks up from her plate of pancakes and looks at taeyong with a surprised look.

“ You never invite me to your friends' parties” Y/n reminds him glancing at doyoung who has a surprised look on his face also surprised that he invited her.

“ Thats for good reasons but this party is gonna be different so do you wanna go” taeyong asks, shoving his mouth with the pancakes making doyoung and y/n cringe at the image.

“ Yeah I'll come. When are we leaving? I want to go back to mine to get ready” Y/n smiles excitedly.

“ It's at 7 so we’ll most likely head over at 7:30 so we still have all day” Doyoung answered while Taeyong pulls his phone out to text Johnny that they're coming.

“ Actually I was thinking of going home early. I have a few things to do before tonight” Y/n smiles, taking a big sip of the orange juice Taeyong poured her.

“ What why you promised that you-” Taeyong starts

“ I also said i would go to that party with you” Y/n cuts him off making him pout and lean back in his chair.

“ I have to head back to my place soon, I can drop you off if you'd like,” Doyoung offers, smiling slightly at her.

“ That would be great thank you” Y/n smiles nodding her head looking down at her pancakes.

“ Wow, so you're both leaving me? '' Taeyong whines, shaking his head in disappointment.

“ Taeyong stop being so needy we will all see each other at the party, Do You all wanna ride together?” Doyoung suggests laughing to himself when Taeyong huffs in annoyance but nods.

“ Sounds good to me” Y/n agrees

“ Tonight is going to be so much fun” Doyoung grins at y/n making taeyong frown and look at his pancakes.

“ Yeah it is”

“ I don't know what to wear” Y/n whines into her phone while she looks over her closet.Its been several hours since doyoung dropped her off at home and after doing a few things around her apartment and finishing off some school work it was time for her to get ready for the party.

“ Why don't you wear those jeans you got last week and that shirt I got you” Taeyong suggests.

“ It's a party Tae i cant show up in mom jeans and a crop top ” Y/n scoffs at her best friend's poor outfit choice.

“ It's a SMALL party just wear something comfortable, you look great in anything anyway” Taeyong compliments making y/n blush and set her phone on her dresser to look through her dresses.

“ Thank you tae...What about that green dress i have”

“ The one you wore to your sister's wedding? Y/N just put on a skirt and a top and you will be fine” Taeyong laughs rubbing his forehead, they have been on the phone for 20 minutes discussing an outfit for her and he still hasn't gotten ready.

“ i'm gonna go shower i'll text you when we're on our way and don't stress you will look great okay” Taeyong smiles not hanging up until he hears her small okay.

“ he's right i will look great” Y/n reassures herself pulling out a pleated skirt and her black sweater deciding on that, its cute and comfy.

“ Where is it” Y/n groans tossing her throw pillows off her couch looking through her cushions for her other earring Taeyong texted her about 10 minutes ago saying that they are on there way to pick her up casing y/n to start rushing around her apartment looking for her missing earring.

“ Whoa what happened in here” Taeyong chuckles as he and doyoung walk into her now messy living room. Y/n screams and gets up from looking under the couch at the sound of someone's voice.

“ When did you get here don't you know not to sneak up on a lady….how did you even get in here” y/n shouts putting her hand over her chest trying to calm down from the scare.

“ The door was unlocked which i told you to stop doing and we said that we were on our way why were you on the floor” Taeyong says confused helping her put the pillows back on the couch.

“ I was looking for my other earring, the dangly one” Y/n pouts her eyes raking over doyoung who looks fantastic as always.

“ This one?” Dyoung asks, holding up an earring that he found on the table.

“ Doyoung you're my hero” Y/n exclamies grabbing the earring from his hand sending him a big smile making him smile back.

“ I'm just going to put this on and grab my phone and I'm ready to go” Y/n smiles rushing to her bedroom. She looks really pretty Doyoung thinks watching as she walks away.

“ Yeah she does” Taeyong frowns, crossing his arms not liking the way Doyoung was looking at his best friend.

“ Oh I um” Doyoung stutterd, shocked that he said that out loud.

“ Okay i am ready” Y/n grins grabbing her keys off her kitchen counter.

“ Okay let's go” Taeyong smiles at y/n the three of them walking out of her apartment. Y/n locking it behind her.

“ You never told me whose party it is, Do I know them?” Y/n asks as they walk towards taeyongs car.Taeyong opens the passenger seat for her while doyoung gets in the back.

“ Its at jungwoo and marks place” Doyoung tells her

“ Don't they live in a frat house?” Y/n says confused.

“ Yep,” Taeyong says quickly, Driving out of the apartment complex.

“ What happened to never going to frat parties” Y/n teases taeyong making him groan and roll his eyes.

“ Okay you can't keep on bringing up how i passed out at that girls party” taeyong whines memories of that horrible night and morning coming back.

“ I didn't say anything” Y/n says between her laughter.

“ It was our first frat party!” Taeyong shouts annoyedly, only making the other two laugh harder.

“ How come I never knew about this?” Doyoung says, clutching his stomach in laughter.

“ Because it's embarrassing,” Taeyong pouts. Y/n smiles and turns in her seat to look back at doyoung.

“ Okay so basically this older girl invited us to a frat party and taeyong thought that she was making a move on him so when we got to the party he tried to flirt with her, only to get turned down” Y/n starts making taeyong groan at the story while doyoung smiles and listens.

“ He was so embarrassed that he was chugging drinks after drinks and i was trying to make him stop and then this is when it gets even more embarrassing”

This is going to be a long night. Teayong thinks with a sigh.

“ Wow and you said this was going to be a small party” Y/n says loudly over the loud music, looking at the over crowded house and the flashing colored lights that are seen from the outside.

“ You're not getting flashbacks are you” Y/n teases taeyong pointing towards the grass lawn that looks identical to the one taeyong passed out on.

“ Come on let's just get inside” Taeyong says, wrapping his arm around her shoulders pulling her towards his chest so they can walk into the house, doyoung walking behind them making sure no one bumps into the girl.

“ There in the basement,” Doyoung says loudly, remembering the text Johnny sent him.

Y/n moves closer to taeyong the loud music and the smell of alcohol making her feel dizzy and the crowd of people dancing and bumping into everyone was not helping.

“ God that was brutal” y/n laughs nervously holding taeyongs hand as they walk down the stairs to the basement feeling nervous knowing that she's about to meet taeyong and doyoung’s other friends. Taeyong just squeezes her hands 3 times letting her know that it's okay.

“ Hey guys!” Doyoung exclaims, making the 7 boys stop their conversation and look at them.

Y/n smiles and looks at the 7 boys only 2 of them being familiar. A course of hey and hellos are said as they greet them, Taeyong leaving her side to go and hug one of them.

“ You must be Y/n” Jungwoo smiles while getting up from sitting on a beanbag.

“ it's nice to finally meet you guys” Y/n smiles seeing them smile back.

“ Y/n it's so good to see you again” Mark grins getting up from the couch to hug her.

“ You to mark and congrat-” Y/n starts but stops when a mark gets shoved from in front of her.

“ Hi im haechan and it's sooo good to meet you” Haechan flirts, holding out his hand for her to shake.

“ nice to meet you haechan i've heard a lot about you” Y/n laughs shaking his hand.

“ all bad things might i add” Taeyong laughs, causing the others to laugh as well.

“ Well you can tell me all about it when i get back from getting drinks, would you like anything?” Haechan smiles, ignoring the look Taeyong gives him for holding her hand for so long.

“ A soda is fine thank you” Y/n smiles

“ I would like a soda to”

“ I wasn't asking you doyoung” Haechan laughs sarcastically before sending the girl another smile before walking up the stairs.

“ Here Y/n come sit” Johnny smiles, patting the seat between him and a very attractive guy who's talking with yuta.

“ Thanks” Y/n smiles sitting between them pulling down her skirt.

“ So taeyong and doyoung was telling us that you got into Mr.Rustfords class” Johnny says, taking a sip of his beer. Before y/n could respond taeil was already saying something.

“ Johnny, it's a party. I'm pretty sure she doest want to talk about getting into the hardest law class” Taeil laughs leaning back in his seat next to jungwoo and haechans bean bags.

“ I was just trying to be nice and get to know her more” Johnny says loudly and before she knew it taeil and johnny were arguing, well more johnny while taeil just sits back laughing weirdly.

“ You will get used to it i promise” Someone whispers to her making her jump slightly turning to look at the person sitting at her other side eyes widening slightly at how handsome he is.

“ Im jaehyun” He smiles making her smile and shake his hand.

“Y/n….So i'm guessing this happens often” y/n laughs tilting her head towards johnny and taeil.

“ Too often to be honest, it's normally haechan who starts the arguments and it's gonna be worse with taeyong and doyoung here” He laughs.

“ I can totally see that. Let me guess doyoung gets teased a lot” Y/n smiles thinking about the many stories taeyong and doyoung told her.

“ Correct” He smiles while taking a sip of his drink leaning back on the couch.

Y/n looks around seeing taeyong having a conversation with yuta and mark and jungwoo and doyoung trying to stop taeil and johnny from arguing.

“ Here you go,” Haechan says loudly, handing her a cola after opening it for her.

“ Thank you haechan” Y/n smiles, taking a sip.

“ Anything for you” He winks before going to sit on his beanbag. Taeyong rolls his eyes at haechans actions already knowing that Haechan would do that and plus he knew that Haechan had a crush on someone else. But doyoung didn't know about haechans crush clearly, as doyoung gives haechan a jealous glare.

“ So what did you have to do to convince taeyong to let you come to one of our parties?” Haechan questions, catching the attention of the others.

“ Would you believe me if I told you taeyong invited me himself” Y/n tells him.

“ yeah no i wouldn't” Haechan jokes causing y/n to smile.

“ trust me i was shocked when he asked her at breakfast” Doyoung adds.

“ you guys had breakfast together?” Mark frowns wishing that he was invited.

“Yeah I stayed over,” Doyoung tells them, making Haechan smirk.

“ You guys slept together?” Haechan jokes, making the others groan at his joke.

“ Haechan please stop,” Taeyong sighs, feeling embarrassed. He glances at y/n to see her laughing, showing that she wasn't bothered by the joke, making taeyong feel better.

“ Is that jealousy in your tone haechan” Y/n jokes glancing between doyoung and taeyong making the others laugh. Haechan leans back in his bean bag, shocked at her joke but he smiles and nods his head.

“ I have a feeling we're gonna be great friends y/n” Haechan smiles.

“ Sure haechan” Y/n smiles, taking a sip of her soda.

“ So y/n you're not much of a partier?” Yuta askes remembering the several times Taeyong has said she wouldn't want to come to a party.

“ Yeah parties aren't my thing, especially frat parties” Y/n answers leaning back against the couch, her shoulder brushing against jaehyuns.

“ What's wrong with frat parties?” Jungwoo asks.

“ Yeah taeyong what's wrong with frat parties” Y/n teases him.

“ What's that supposed to mean?” Taeil wonders.

“ Lets just say that they don't have the best track record with frat parties especially taeyong” Doyoung chuckles looking at y/n.

“ Okay i don't think i can handle having this conversation again, I'm going to go get a stronger drink” Taeyong says getting up from his seat glancing at y/n.

“ You wanna come?” He asks.

“ Yeah sure” Y’/n nods, getting up from the couch walking over to Taeyong holding onto his arm.

“ Wait for me” Both Jungwoo and haechan say, wanting to go with them.

“ I'm Going to get another soda” Y/n tells taeyong when they get upstairs, Haechan and jungwoo leaving them to go talk to some of their other friends.

“ Do you want me to come with you?” Taeyong shouts over the music moving over so someone can pass them. Y/n shakes her head no squeezing his arm before walking over to the table that has all the soda, being careful not to bump into anyone.

“ I'm surprised Taeyong left you alone” Someone says behind her making her turn around, smiling when she sees its doyoung.

“ I didn't give him a chance to say anything so i just walked away” Y/n tells him. Doyoung just nods and looks over her face before clearing his throat.

“ Um, can we talk?” Doyoung asks nervously, putting his hands in his pockets. Y/n nods, setting down the soda she grabbed. He must want to talk about last night, she thinks.

“ Sure, Do you want to go outside where it's quieter?” Y/n suggests not wanting to have this conversation with music blasting in the background.

“ That sounds good,” Doyoung smiles, holding his hand out for her to hold.

Y/n holds his hand following him to the backyard where only a few people were.

“ That's disgusting” They say in unison at the sight of a couple full on making out against a tree.

“ Lets go over there” Y/n tells him, pulling him over to a bench. Doyoung follows her, both of them sitting down there shoulders almost touching. After a few moments y/n noticed that doyoung was looking at the ground, a nervous look on his face lost in his thoughts.

“ You said you wanted to talk about what happened” Y/n reminded him, putting her hand on his shoulder. Doyoung nods and clears his throat turning to face her feeling even more nervous at the kind smile she gives him.

“ I was wondering if you wanted to go on a date with me” He says quickly, almost tripping on his own words.

“ A date” Y/n repeats unsure not expecting this to happen, She honestly expected him to say how they just should forget about the kiss.

“ Yes a date….With me, On friday at that new restaurant that opened up” He rambles feeling even more nervous that y/n hasn't said anything and that she's looking at him in shock.

“ But if you don't want to, i understand and maybe you're busy on friday or maybe someone else asked you out” Doyoung rants rubbing his thighs nervously.

“ I'll go on a date with you” Y/n giggles interrupting him. Finding his nervousness cute she grabs his hand and squeezes it.

“ Wait really” Doyoung grinned looking down at their locked hands.

“ I did say yes didn't I, now can we go inside? I'm getting cold ” Y/n smiles rubbing her thighs together.

“ yeah of course come on” He said with a fond smile, helping her stand up.

“ Thank you” she says quietly, Doyoung smiles and holds her hand walking towards the door. Both of them glance at each other laughing quietly when they pass by the same couple from earlier.

“ I'm going to go find taeyong okay” Y/n tells doyoung leaning up so he can hear her better.

“ Okay please be careful,” Doyoung tells her, leaning down to kiss her cheek. Y/n smiles and squeezes his hand before letting go. Y/n carefully moves through the crowd glancing back at doyoung to see him walking towards the basement door.

“ Oh hey y/n” Taeil says behind her making her jump in fright.

“ Oh hey taeil” Y/n smiles, turning around to look at him.

“ I'm sorry i didn't mean to scare you” Taeil frowns making y/n laugh and shake her head.

“ It's okay, don't worry, I'm just a jumpy person. Also, have you seen Taeyong, I've been looking for him?” Y/n questions rubbing her arm looking around to see if she can find him but the flashing colored lights and all the people didn't help.

“ He went upstairs. I think he went to the marks room, he was complaining about the noise. Mark's name is on the door” Taeil smiles before walking over to his friends that called for him.

Y/n sighs and moves through the dancing bodies making her way up the stairs. Y/n looks for Mark's name on the doors as she walks down the strangely long hallway. Stopping in front of Mark's door, she decides to knock on the door before just walking in.

“ Go away” Taeyong's voice is heard making y/n frown at what he said,Going to open the door but it's locked.

“ Tae it's me y/n can i come in” Y/n says her voice showing that she's worried. Taeyong sighs from the other side of the door, getting up from laying down on Mark's bed to open the door.

“ Are you okay” Y/n says walking into the room turning to face him.

“ Yeah I'm okay just remembering why I hate parties so much” He sighs, closing the door and sitting back on Mark's bed.

“ Did something happen?” She frowns sitting next to him resting her head on his shoulder. Taeyong smiles slightly looking down at her before laying his head on top of hers.

“ No i just hate parties” He tells her, not telling her the truth that he’s actually jealous.

“ So what were you and doyoung talking about? '' He asks her grabbing onto her hand to look at her charm bracelet, smiling at all the charms he's given her over the years.

“ what” she asks confused, lifting her head off his shoulder.

“ I saw you guys talking through the window and i didnt want to interrupt you guys” He asks, adjusting the way he's sitting so he can face her.

“ Oh he um” Y/n starts before pausing. She sighs playing with the end of her skirt.

“ He asked me on a date and i said yes”

“ He asked you on a date….and you said yes. '' Taeyong repeats quietly, the words repeating in his head. My best friend asked the girl I've been in love with since middle school on a date and she said yes.

“ Wow that's...awesome” He says with a fake smile, It only hurts more when she returns the smile.

“ He's taking me to that new restaurant that opened,” She grins facing him but she soon frowns when she sees the look on her best friend's face.

“ Taeyong, are you okay?” she asks gently, rubbing his arm.

“ Um” Taeyong starts pulling away from her and standing up.

“ Yeah I'm just not feeling too good, is it okay if we head home early? I'll go get doyoung and you...you can wait by the door” Taeyong stammered. Y/n nods letting out a small of course. Watching him rush out of the room a frown on her face.

After a few moments of sitting in silence she makes her way down the stairs and over to the front door, deciding to wait outside instead.

“ There you are i thought-” Taeyong starts walking over to her.

“ It was too crowded, wheres doyoung?” She asks, noticing that he's not with him.

“ Jaehyun is going to give him a ride back home, he wants to stay longer” He tells her, walking down the street and towards the car.

“ I only had a beer” He mumbles informing her, opening the door for her.

“Thank yo-” She goes to say but gets cut off by him closing the door. She huffs and puts her seat belt on, crossing her arms over her chest. Yeah he's definitely upset about something.

The drive to y/ns apartment was silent, it was obvious he didn't want to talk and y/n didn't want to push him.

“ I'll see you tomorrow” Y/n smiles softly, taking off her seatbelt and opening her door.

“ goodnight” He whispers, watching her walk off to her apartment making sure she gets inside safely. Taeyong drives home with a broken heart leaving a confused y/n.

It was currently Friday, a full week since the party and the day of y/n and doyoungs date and y/n was getting out from her last class for the day. It was an important class and instead of paying attention, All she could think about was how Taeyong is still avoiding her.

No calls, Texts or late study sessions. Even though they both took different majors, Taeyong always tried to help her if she didn't understand. But this week was total radio silence. Y/ns called and texted but he only responded to her texts with a few word answers. Saying that he was fine and busy.

Friends fight, and y/n and taeyong had their fair amount of arguments over the years they've been friends. But nothing this serious. They always forgiven each other the day it happened. So barely talking to each other and not seeing each other all week was really affecting y/n.

“ Y/n wait up!” Someone shouts, making her pause from walking down the stone stairs in front of their university, and look around for who called her. Silently wishing that it's taeyong. But stops wishing when she sees a smiling Jaehyun jogging over to her.

“ Oh, hey jaehyun” Y/n greets holding her books to her chest. Jaehyun smiles at her, fixing his backpack on his shoulder from his jog.

“ Don't sound to dissipopinted” He jokes with a laugh, noticing her slight frown and her slouched posture.

“ I'm sorry I was hoping you were taeyong, have you seen him by any chance?” She asks, moving down the stairs so other students can walk past them.

“ Yeah, I saw him yesterday and we talked this morning. Why has he not talked with you?” He frowns seeing the worried look on her face.

“ I Haven't seen him since the party. He was pretty upset when we left. And he's only answered a few of my texts and I saw him in the hallway and I called for him and he turned around pretending he didn't see me” she says, upset, looking down at her shoes.

“ That doesn't sound like him, Did something happen at the party that would have made him upset at you?” He suggests gently grabbing her arm and pulling her over to a bench to sit on so they can talk comfortably.

“ I don't think so, after i told him about my date he started getting upset” She says cluelessly.

“ Your date?”

“ Yeah doyoung asked me on a date, It's actually tonight ” She tells him with a pout still clueless as ever. Jaehyun's mouth forms into an O, Now understanding the reason behind taeyongs strange behavior.

“ Maybe...that's the reason...why he's upset” He explains, making her look at him in confusion.

“ Why would he be upset about that?” she asks, tilting her head, looking at him. Jaehyun sighs thinking of a way to tell her the truth but not fully expose taeyong.

“ Jaehyun? please tell me” She pleads, seeing the knowing look on his face.

“ Have you ever thought that maybe he likes you?” he asks.

y/n shakes her head no, looking away from him. “ taeyong doesn't like me”

“ Are you sure about that, it would make sense why he would be upset about your date” he suggests, even though he knows the truth, y/n doesn't. and he doesnt think taeyong would be too happy if he fully exposed his crush on her.

Y/n leans back and starts thinking about her friendship with taeyong. Him always showing affection and skinship, the compliments, all the things they do that other people would think were dates, the countless times they've been called a couple. And y/n liked it and taeyong seemed to really like it too.

“ I have to go, I'll talk to you later” y/n says quickly, getting off the bench and grabbing her books and her book bag. Sending him a quick smile before running down the sidewalk and towards her car.

Jaehyun laughs as he watches her run, almost dropping her books and tripping over a rock.

But y/n didn't care about how she almost fell and embarrassed herself, she only had one thing on her mind and that was she had to talk to taeyong.

As soon as y/n pulls up to taeyongs apartment building, She's quickly rushing out of her car and into the building ignoring the annoyed look that the security guard gives her for running inside.

And by the time y/n is in front of his door she's panting and leaning against his door. I really should not skip going to the gym with Tae anymore, she thinks.

After a few moments of catching her breath she moves her hair out of her face and knocks on his door.

“ Come on come on” She mumbles after a few minutes of him not opening up. She sighs and knocks again, louder this time but not too loud. She is the reason why he already has two noise complaints.

“ Taeyong please, I know you're in there. I literally saw your car in the parking lot,” she says loudly, Knocking again. Frowning when she hears a loud bang from the other side of the door.

“ taeyong please i know you can hear me, you just dropped something, please id rather not have this conversation with a door between us” but again there's nothing but silence and a closed door.

“ Are you seriously not going to open the door? You're going to leave me out here looking like an idiot in front of the screaty cameras. That security guard who hates my guts is probably laughing right now” she whines upset, leaning her head against the door.

After a few minutes of silence she lifts her head up glaring at the door. He's really ignoring me, he's not even giving me a chance.

“ I can't believe you. You have ignored me all week and now when I'm here, ready to talk, you ignore me again.” She says in disbelief at the way he's acting, Fighting the urge to start crying she crosses her arms and stares sadly at the door.

“ Did you need something?” One of Taeyong's neighbors asks her, unlocking her apartment across from his. y/n looks away from the door and sends her a weak smile.

“ No I was just leaving, It's not worth it anyway” she says, glancing one more time at his door hoping that he would open it and explain everything to her but he never does so she walks away.

“ Do you have a reservation?” The hostess greets nicely when she notices y/n walk into the restaurant. Y/n looks away from the nice hanging lights and smiles at the hostess moving closer to the stand.

“ I’m meeting with someone, Kim doyoung. He should be here already” Y/n answers making the hostess send her a big smile.

“ Ah yes, the nervous guy who's chugging water. This must be your first date. I'll show you the table” the hostess smiles leading her towards the table.

“ Thank you, and yes it is” y/n follows after her, the nervousness now stirring inside her. From everything that's happened the last week y/n found it hard for herself to truly be excited for the date. But as soon as she saw the happy smile on doyoungs face as he stood up from the table when he saw her, she knew that she had to try to be happy for this date.

“ Hi, you look beautiful,” Doyoung smiles, getting up to hug her. Y/n smiles and hugs him before sitting in the chair that he pulled out for her. Before y/n could say anything back the hostess smiled nicely at them telling them that their waiter would be over soon.

“ Thank you, you look handsome too” Y/n blushes looking down at the dress that took her 2 hours to decide if she wanted to wear it. It reminded her of taeyong.

“ this place is amazing, i didn’t know it was so fancy tho” Y/n smiles looking around at the restaurant. Doyoung smiles and nods while taking a sip of his water.

“ It is really nice, and they have a gallery next door, they even have a few paintings here” He says excitedly, making y/n smile fondly at his excitement.

“ I didn't know you liked art?” She asks.

“ I don't, well not really. I remember you talking about how much you like art, and if the gallery is still open maybe we could check it out after dinner?” he suggests.

Y/n smiled at what he said, the fact that he remembered makes her happy.

“ that sounds great doyoung”

“ Hi, I'm Olivia and I'll be your server for today, can we start out with some drinks?” Oliva asks, holding her notebook. y/n looks away from doyoung and quickly looks down at her menu before smiling at her.

“ Oh i'll have a raspberry tea” Y/n answers, it was the first drink she saw on the menu.

“ I'll have the same ” Doyoung smiles politely. Oliva smiles and writes down the orders, walking to the kitchen.

“ I heard that there's going to be a new musical, are you going to be in it?” Y/n asks him, putting her elbow on the table and resting her chin on her hand, leaning closer to him. Doyoung blushes at her eye contact and folds his hands on the table nervously.

“ I hope so, auditions are next week and i know this musical like the back of my hand so i'm pretty confident but anything can happen”

“ Well if you're as good as your last one, I know you're going to make it” Y/n compliments. Thinking about that time, she and Taeyong went to see his previous musical. Y/n was amazed by his talent and his dedication.

“ Thank you, that means a lot. '' Doyoung smiles and before he could continue a very joyful Olivia walked over to them holding their drinks.

“ Here you guys go, any idea of what you guys would like to order, i can come back in a few minutes if you're not ready” Oliva smiles brightly, putting their drinks in front of them.

“ That would be great thank you” Y/n smiles, taking a sip of her tea.

“ What have you been up to, we haven't talked much since the party” doyoung wonders after oliva walks away.

“ I'm sorry about that, this week was not the best and honestly just work and my classes” Y/n explains, looking up from the menu to send him a small smile.

“ Did something happen? Are you okay? '' he asks worriedly. Y/n bites her lip and contemplates if she should tell him about her and taeyong not talking, but then he's going to wonder why and then it's just going to be a mess and y/n doesn't want to go through that.

“ I'm okay i don't really wanna talk about it right now if that's okay”

“ yeah of course that's okay” Doyoung says quickly, sending her a big smile. Y/n smiles and glances down at his menu that he hasn't looked at.

“ Do you already know what you're getting?” She questions making him look down two then back at her.

“ Oh um yes, i already looked when i first got here” He confirms fidigitting with the ends on the menu.

“ I hope i didn't make you wait long” Y/n says with a frown glancing around the restaurant.

“ Oh no you didn't, I came here early. Don't worry you didn't make me wait” He says quickly to reassure her leaning forward a little. Y/n smiles and nods, setting down her menu while watching him take a big gulp of his tea.

Doyoung sets his glass down and clears his throat, rubbing his thighs. Sending her a small smile.

“ I'm going to go use the bathroom, i'll be right back” he says with a sorry smile.

“ Okay, i'll be here” she smiles back.Doyoung nods and sends her one more smile before walking to the back of the restaurant where the bathroom is.

Y/n sighs and leans back in her seat, resting her hands in her lap. Looking around the restaurant with curious eyes. Like doyoung told her there were beautiful paintings on the wall. It reminded her of that summer when she dragged taeyong to that art gallery during their first year of college.

Taeyong also enjoyed art a lot, he was the one who introduced her to her first art gallery. Y/n looks away from the painting and down at her hands. Thinking about Taeyong made her heart fill up with sadness.

Y/n looks at her purse that's hanging on her seat in confusion when she hears and feels it vibrate multiple times. Did Taeyong finally text me back?. Y/n pulls her phone out and quickly frowns in confusion when she sees the texts.

unknown: so how did it go with taeyong?

unknown: wait are you on your date rn

unknown: This is jaehyun btw!

How did he get my number? Y/n thinks, going to text him back but stops when she sees the three dots.

unknown: i got your number from mark…

I don't have Mark's number? Y/n sighs and changes his contact name.

Jaehyun: He got it from Haechan and I honestly don't know how he got it. He probably got it from taeyongs phone.

y/n: yes i'm on my date and things didn't go well with taeyong he pulled a elsa and ignored me.

Jaehyun: don't give up, try talking to taeyong again.

Y/n chooses not to answer and puts her phone back in her purse. She felt confused, she didn't know what to do. She wanted to give doyoung a chance and even though their date hasn't been long...she was honestly having a good time.

But the thought that Taeyong,her best friend for years actually had feelings for her. It...it made her feel guilty for being on the date. With his best friend. Thinking about it more only made y/n feel more guilty.

Was Taeyong going to hate her even more because she still went on the date? Is he ever going to talk to her again? Will their friendship ever be the same? Did he actually hate her? Was she going to ruin Taeyong and doyoung’s friendship by being on this date?

All these questions in her head and she was starting to feel overwhelmed but the biggest question was making her heart feel heavy. Did he even like her?. It was like everything was happening and she didn't even have time to actually comprehend the situation fully.

Y/n needed to think and as much as she was enjoying her time with doyoung, She knew that it wasn't going to help her resolve the problem at hand. Y/n starts rubbing her hands over her thighs and her dress suddenly starting to feel uncomfortable at all the thoughts.

“ I'm sorry there was a surprisingly long line” Doyoung smiles, sitting back down, tearing y/n away from looking at her lap.

“ y/n? Are you okay, you look pale?” Doyoung asks, feeling worried when he sees her frown and the paleness of her face.

“ um...i. I'm just not feeling too well, it's been a long week and i think it all just hit me suddenly” she stutters. Fumbling while grabbing her purse. Doyoung just looks at her with a confused look when she stands up holding her purse.

“ I'm sorry i think i should go” She says quickly but before she can turn to walk away he softly grabs onto her wrist. The worried look he gives her only makes her feel even more guilty for leaving.

“ Are you sure? I can drive you home” he says feeling uneasy at the thought of her being alone like this.

“ I'm okay i...ill text you” She stutters and quickly turns around rushing out of the restaurant, not waiting for his response.

Doyoung frowns and sits back down in his seat, watching as she rushes out.

“ I'm sorry for the wait, oh where did the pretty lady go? Should i come back in a few minutes for your order” Olivia's cheerfully voice makes doyoung look away from the empty seat and to her.

“ Oh no, just the bill please” He says with a sad smile. Olivia just nods and gives him a sorry smile before walking away.

Y/n quickly gets in her car and locks it. She groans loudly and rests her head against the steering wheel. God why did you leave like that she complains, the sad look on doyoungs face imprinted in her brain. She ended up staying in that position for a few minutes, trying to calm down her fast heartbeat.

But her heart beat only gets faster when someone knocks on the passenger seat window. She quickly looks up and faces the window, cursing to herself when she sees Doyoung leaning down and moving his hands around to tell her to unlock the door.

Y/n sighs and unlocks the door, watching as he gets inside and turns to face her, sending her a smile.

“ Hey” He says breathlessly from running over to her car.

“Hi...what are you doing?” She asks, confused not expecting him to be here.

“ I saw your car and I knew I couldn't end the night like this, I want to make sure you're okay” He smiles and before she can say anything he's already talking again.

“ You can come back to mine and I can make some soup. And we can watch a movie and I'll even let you pick the movie” he smiles, trying to persuade her. Y/n just looks away with a frown on her face why does he have to be so sweet.

“ doyoung i cant okay”

“ Are you worried that you might be sick and contagious? Or do you just want to sleep, my bed is pretty comfortable” he rants with a smile.

“Doyoung i can't be with you right now okay” Y/n snaps. Immediately feeling regret as soon as she sees the hurt look on his face at her outburst.

“I…I'm sorry, okay,I just have to go to taeyongs. I need to talk to him,”she tells him. Doyoung scoffs and shakes his head in disbelief.

“ You're leaving our date to talk to taeyong, what can he help you with that i can't” He says hurt, y/n sighs and faces him.

“ Doyoung please don't be upset, i promise to talk to you about it later but i cant right now”

“ What about our kiss? Did it mean nothing to you” He says hurt but y/n doesn't answer. Doyoung thought that with her silence she meant yes but honestly she didn't know the answer herself.

“ You like him, don't you? Like more than a friend” Doyoung accused and after a few moments of silence and y/n staring at her lap sadly. He frowns and goes to open the door.

“ How did you know” y/n asked, making him stop in his actions and look at her.

“ I didn't not until now…and it's no secret that taeyong feels the same” he says sadly feeling sorry when he sees the sad look on her face.

“ I should go, and you should go talk to taeyong” He frowns before getting out of the car and walking to his car. Y/n looks away from his fading figure and starts her car, driving away from the restaurant and to Taeyong's.

Y/n tried not to think about everything that just happened as she drove to taeyongs. She just wanted to focus on getting there safely. And in all honesty if she thought about it more, she would most likely go home instead of talking to him.

She was scared, she didn't know what was going to happen. Was he going to even open the door? Was he going to tell her that he never liked her? Or was he going to change their relationship forever by telling her that he does have feelings for her?.

Y/n was scared of change…and she knew that after tonight everything would change and y/n didn't like that.

“ You can do this” She whispers to herself as she turns off her car, parked in front of the apartment building. Half of herself is telling her to go up and talk to him and the other half is telling her to go home and cry with a pint of ice cream.

“Isn't a little late for you to be here” the security guard,Ray Complains as he sees her walk into the empty lobby. Y/n rolls her eyes and looks at the clock hanging on the wall behind the front desk he's sitting at.

“ It's not even 7, and you should be used to me coming at all times” She tells him, choosing to ignore the way he mumbled to himself on how he wishes he wasn't.

“ Well I was hoping that you wouldn't come back because of the breakup but sadly you're here” He groaned, setting down the magazine he was reading. Y/n rolls her eyes and holds tightly on her purse and walks towards the elevator pressing the button.

“ One we aren't dating and Two didn't Mr. Jones say you weren't supposed to read magazines while you're working” She smirks remembering that time where she and Taeyong got back from buying a bunch of macarons just in time to see the owner of the building getting onto Ray about not fully focusing on his job.

“ ha ha ha enjoy your visit” He says sarcastically already looking at the magazine. Y/n turns around and sends him a sarcastic smile before getting into the elevator and pressing the floor number nervously.

Ray was a security guard that's been working at the apartment building for longer than taeyong has been living there. He was a middle aged man who honestly had no interest in the two friends, he just liked watching how frustrated y/n would get at his comments.

Y/n plays with her bracelet nervously as she steps out of the elevator and walks forward to stand in front of taeyongs apartment. She takes a deep breath before knocking on the door, taking a step back to not be so close.

After waiting a few moments and he still hasn't answered she was starting to lose hope. As she turns to leave she hears the lock unlock. She turns back around to see Taeyong looking at her with a sad look on his face. She could tell that he was tired and upset by his appearance.

“ Hey” She hesitated, breaking the silence. Y/n nervously starts playing with the end of her dress.This all felt too weird to her she wasn't used to how taeyong was acting and she never wants to.

“ hi” he says quietly looking her over even though he was upset he couldn't deny that she looked beautiful in the dress she must have gone on that date he cursed at himself.

“ Can I come in?”

Taeyong doesn't answer, he just opens the door wider and steps back so she could come in. Y/n sends him a thankful smile before walking inside and setting her purse on the table that has his keys and wallet.

Taeyong closes the door with a sigh and follows after her, stopping in his tracks when she quickly turns around giving him a serious look.

“ We need to talk, and I'm not leaving until we figure this out. Because i honestly can't go another day without talking to you”

“ And can I just start out by saying how dickish it was of you to just totally ignore me earlier..and basically this whole week? Do you not know how worried I was or scared? I thought you never wanted to talk to me, and I don't want to sound dramatic but this has been the worst week of my life” Y/n rants, making taeyong look away in guilt.

“ I'm sorry okay, i didn't want to talk” He sighs, turning around walking towards his bedroom.

“ We have always talked through things. Why stop now?” She spoke following after him, grabbing his shoulder making him turn around with an annoyed sigh.

“ I don't know what to say,” he says frustrated. Throwing his hands up in annoyance. Y/n shakes her head and steps back from him crossing her arms over her chest with a frown.

“ Why don't you tell me the truth?” She says quietly with a knowing look. Taeyong shakes his head with a frown, knowing that if he does tell the truth things will change. For good or bad he doesn't know. And like y/n he wasn't too fond of change as well.

“ Just answer me this, you went on that date didn't you” he accused stepping closer to her looking down at her dress. He remembers when he first saw her in that dress, he had invited her to his family's christmas party and he swore he fell in love with her even more when he saw her.

That dress brings him back to a memory of him having an amazing day with her and his family but now all he will remember it by is the date she went on with doyoung.

“ I did,” She says quickly. She already knew that he wouldn't be happy with her answer so she just said it quickly to get over it. Taeyong nods, trying not to show how hurt he is by her answer. He already knew the answer but it hurt more when she said it out loud.

“Then the truth doesn't matter!” he snapped loudly, making her flinch and step back at his outburst. He's never raised his voice at her like that so he felt terrible when she looked at him with a look he couldn't explain.

“ Of course it matters tae, why do you think I'm here? Why do you think I left that date-”

“ You left the date?” He cuts her off shocked at what she revealed. Why would she?

“ Yes I did. I didn't want to be there, I wanted to be here…with you” she whispers towards the end. Looking at anything except him. Taeyong tries not to smile at her words.

“I'm sorry for yelling, why don't we go in the living room and talk” He murmured tilting his towards the living room. Y/n agrees and follows him to the living room. Taeyong sits next to her and hands her the blanket draped over the back of the couch so she can cover her legs.

Y/n covers her legs and turns to face him to see he's already looking at her. Taeyong sighs and runs his fingers through his hair, a habit he does when he's stressed.

“ I’m sorry, I shouldn't have ignored you” He sighs, breaking the silence.

“ You should have just talked to me and told me how you feel,” She says gently, playing with the corner of the blanket.

“ I thought it would have just been easier if i distanced myself, maybe i would feel different after some time” He says quickly hoping that she would understand.

“ Are you talking about being upset with me going on the date….or your feelings for me?” She asks, seeing how tense he got at her words.

“ What….haha my feelings…what do you mean?” he nervously says, shaking his head.

She can't know. He thinks to himself.

“ You don't have to pretend, jaehyun told me, or well he helped me realize i should say” She clarified watching him with a frown when he stands up and rubs the back of his neck, something he does when he's stressed.

“ Don't be mad at him please, he just wanted to help. '' She begged standing up, holding onto his hand, squeezing it three times like he does when she's nervous or scared.

“ I'm not mad, just disappointed” he mumbled, y/n wouldn't have heard if she wasnt so close.

“ In jaehyun….or me?”

“ in myself” He starts, facing her looking at her with a blank expression.

“ I'm your best friend, I shouldn't have the feeling I have for you. I don't want to ruin our friendship. So maybe it's best if we distance ourselves” He rants, pulling his hand from hers.

“Don't cry, it's only going to be for a little” he frowns when he sees her sit on the couch her eyes welled up with tears, She didn't understand why he would think that would fix things.

“ Is liking me really that bad that you want to stop seeing me so much” She whispers sadly, her voice cracking at the end. Taeyong frowns and crouches in front of her, reaching up to wipe her tears off her cheeks.

“ Y/n i dont want to ruin what we have okay, you mean too much to me. I know how you feel about change, I just think i need some time”

“ You haven't even asked me how I feel about this? You're not the only one in this friendship, it's not just about your choice” She says, clearly upset, pushing his hands away from her face. Standing up quickly, moving away from him. Taeyong stands up as well, turning around to face her.

“ I assumed that you didn't feel the same way, plus you went on that date and you've never...” He trailed off with a pout.

“ I've never what” Y/n crosses her arms over her chest and glares at him waiting for his answer. Is he trying to say this is my fault? She thinks.

“ You never showed that you liked me more than a friend, there was a few times i thought you felt the same way But your just naturally affectionate so i didnt think more of it” He defends

“ Well you've always been affectionate to me since we became friends, So i never thought you liked me more than a friend Besides you've had girlfriends” She argues loudly, She honestly Didn't know why she was yelling she just had to let it out someway.

“ Well i've always liked you, The whole time and i just dated them so i could try to get over my feelings for you but it never worked” He also argues loudly but with his answer it makes y/n quiet and drop her arms in shock.

“ The whole time?....you liked me the whole time and you never told me” She tears up again at the thought.

“ Yes the whole time and I never told you because I didn't want to mess us up if you didn't feel the same way” He starts letting out a breath and stepping closer to her.

“the reason i first talked to you was because i thought you were pretty” He confesses with an embarrassed chuckle. Y/n cracks a smile and wipes her tears with a sniffle.

“ I don't know why you would think that, I looked terrible in middle school” She laughs also feeling embarrassed when she thinks back at her appearance in middle school.

“ You didn't look terrible to me, I loved your messy pigtails” He teases with a smile. Y/n just groans and covers her face in embarrassment also hoping he wouldn't see the shy smile on her face.

“ I really hope i didn't mess up what we have, Because i want a lifetime of making fun of you for those pigtails” He smiles slightly, hiding how truly scared he feels at the moment.

“ You didn't mess up what we have,” She whispers, moving to touch his arm but he starts pacing clearly anxious.

“ Are you sure because I completely understand if i did and i will try to fix it, I will try harder than i've ever tried for anything. But be completely sure because i can't imagine how awkward it's going to be for us now when you know i have feelings for you and when i know you don't feel the same way”

He rants going on full panic mode as he turns around so he's not facing her anymore. Weekly movie nights that are normally filled with talking, Laughter, And cuddles? Yeah not anymore just full on awkward silence while he makes sure that he won't be touching her in any way. And it is going to be all my fault. He thinks blaming himself.

“ I do like you- a lot” She cuts him off. Taeyong goes quiet and turns to look at her, his arms that were resting on his hips are now at his sides while he looks at her in astonishment.

“It just took me some time to realize it”

He's been wanting to hear those words come from her for years; he's thought of different scenarios when she would say them. But now that it's actually happening he had no idea on what to do. He just stood still, his mouth parted open in shock.

“Y/n…Do you really mean that” he doubted, Finding it hard to believe that she would feel the same.

“ Would I lie to you?”

“ I mean i'm pretty sure you lied about liking one of my outfits” He joked making her roll her eyes. That is true though.

“ Taeyong be serious for a moment” She whines, slapping his arm,making him wince dramatically and start rubbing where she hit him.

“ I know I'm sorry, I'm just….wow” He chuckles to himself with a big grin on his face, too happy to be able to form a full sentence.

“Don't be sorry” She says with a comforting smile.

“I can't believe this is happening” Taeyong grins and hugs her tight, lifting her up and twirling her around making her laugh.

“ Me either but i'm glad it did” She grins looking up at him when he sets her down.

“ Wow okay im feeling slightly overwhelmed” He smiles. Y/n laughs and grabs his hand pulling him to sit down on the couch. Y/n sitting next to him turning her body to face him.

“ Does that mean i shouldn't kiss you….I don't want to overwhelm you more” She teased. Trying not to laugh when he quickly turns his head towards her looking at her with wide eyes. She wants to kiss me? He feels his heart beat faster at the thought.

“ No you definitely should, i think it would help” He says letting out a fake wince.

“ Well if it's going to help” She trails off with a smile. Taeyong nods and leans forward capturing her lips with his, their chests touching as he pulls her closer. Y/n moves her hand to hold his cheek while he moves his hand to her lower back.

Y/n used to think it was just something that happened in those romantic dramas she watched. Feeling all warm and fuzzy? Feeling fireworks? How unrealistic she used to think. But the moment she kissed Taeyong she understood completely what they meant. She did feel warm and fuzzy and she couldn't feel happier.

“ Is this real?” He asked in a gentle tone looking at her with a fond smile, when she pulled away from the kiss both of their cheeks tinted with a wild blush from the kiss they just shared.

“ You feel real” She jokes, poking his side making him push her hand away with a laugh. Y/n smiles and leans back against the couch, watching as he reaches for her hand playing with her fingers. A habit of his.

“ So um, where do we go from here?” He asks, glancing at her, almost frowning when he sees her smile falter at the question. What do they do now?

“ Would it be fair if I said we should take it slow? We've been taking it slow for years” She jokes in a sarcastic tone. Taeyong laughs and rolls his eyes.

“ I would say that we are experts at taking it slow” He smirks, internally cursing at himself for not telling her sooner.

“ Then I think you should take me on a date” Y/n grins, resting her legs on his lap, liking the soft feeling of his sweatpants against her bare legs.

“ What? I think you should take me on a date” He laughs caressing her legs, smiling when he feels her goosebumps.

“ You're the one who's been keeping me waiting all these years, It's the right thing to do tae” She teases him, grabbing the blanket to warm her up. Not only is this dress extremely uncomfortable, it's also not doing anything to keep me warm.

“ I've been keeping you waiting? You're the one” He rants but y/n doesn't listen to the rest all she can focus on is. The cute expression on his face as he rants. He looks so cute when he tries to be angry.

“ lets just agree that it was that stupid rules fault” She cuts him off with a smile. Taeyong stops ranting and looks at her with a smile, agreeing with her.

“ Who suggested that rule anyway” Y/n wonders, trying to remember. Taeyong plays with the blanket and looks back at the exact moment they made the rules.

The two 12 year olds were in y/ns treehouse that her dad built for her and her older sister. Y/n's sister was 5 years older than her and she was currently in the “ i'm the cool older sister who is too busy for you” phase. Meaning that the treehouse was all hers.

“ I think it's a good idea” 12 year old y/n grins looking away from the small window that she was looking out of; spying on her sister and her boyfriend.

“ I think I saw it in some movie my sister was watching,” she smiles, moving to sit next to Taeyong on the carpet, watching as he starts writing things in his notebook. And for the next 20 minutes they sat writing rules that they would follow to make sure their friendship lasts.

“ what about never falling in love with your best friend” Taeyong suggests watching y/n read over the rules they already have.

“ I don't know why we would need that as a rule, because it's never going to happen. My mom says that boyfriends distract you from your grades” Y/n shakes her head giving him back his notebook and grabbing her dried sweet potatoes from the small table.

“ Give me one” He asks, reaching for one but y/n moves away with a giggle, not letting him get one.

“ Y/n stop” Taeyong whines reaching out again. Y/n laughs and hands him the bag before grabbing her spyglass off the floor, moving to the window.

“ How long do you think they're going to be out here? '' She questions looking at her sister and her boyfriend drying off from the pool, a disgusted look on y/n's face.

y/n doesn't like her sister's boyfriend, and since taeyong was y/n's best friend that meant that he also didn't like him.

“ Y/n…why don't we just make them leave”

Y/n turns away from the window, seeing Taeyong holding up 2 water guns with a smirk on his face. And y/n knows immediately what he means and she was so down.

“ Okay i go left you go right” Y/n whispers, both of them hiding behind a bush that's behind the young couple. Taeyong nods and moves to the right, closing in on them so that they both will have an open shot.

Taeyong looks back at y/n to see her counting down on her fingers and as soon as she gets to one they both stand up and start shooting at the couple, both of them heavily focusing on the male.

Y/n and taeyong can't help but laugh as they watch them run around trying to not get wet. The two twelve year olds stop shooting when y/n sisters boyfriend trips into the pool from running.

“ Y/n taeyong! You guys are so dead!” the older girl shrieks, reaching out to help her boyfriend.

Y/n grabs taeyongs arm and runs towards the latter to the treehouse. They both rush up the ladder and move a beanbag over the trap door so no one can come up.

After a few moments of the heavy breathing from rushing up the ladder. They glance at each other and break out into laughter at what happened. Y/n lays on her back on the carpet clutching her stomach from how hard she's laughing.

Taeyong watches her with a smile and while y/n gets distracted with books Taeyong writes in his notebook.

Rule 47 DON'T FALL IN LOVE WITH YOUR BEST FRIEND!

“ I think I was the one who suggested it,” he says shyly, watching y/n laugh and shake her head.

“ you think?” she teases, raising her eyebrow. Taeyong blushes and playfully pushes her legs off his lap making y/n sit up with a fake frown.

“ Come on, I know you must be uncomfortable in that dress” He says standing up and holding his hand out to help her off the couch. Y/n smiles and grabs his hand and follows him into his bedroom.

“ You know where everything is, i'm going to get some snacks and we can watch a movie in bed” he suggests with a smile as he watches y/n pull out one of his shirts and a pair of shorts she's left over.

“ Okay, can you bring my phone when you come back?” She questions with a smile. Taeyong nods and walks out of the room, closing the door behind him for her privacy. Y/n quickly changes and lays her dress out on taeyongs chair at his desk before going into the bathroom to clean off her makeup.

Y/n laughs when she opens one of the drawers to see a bunch of chapsticks, most of them are ones she bought for him. She got tired of him complaining about dry lips so she decided to just buy him a ton for him to use.

Y/n grabs a watermelon lip smacker and coats her lips in it, setting it back on the counter. Y/n turns off the lights in the bathroom and closes the door behind her. Walking to his bed and pulling the blanket back to get under it smiling at the warmth of the bed.

Y/n leans against the headboard and grings the blanket under her chin, turning on the tv and looking through the channels for something to put on.

“ Y/n?” taeyong questions on the other side of the door knocking on it. Y/n tells him she's decent and sends him a big smile when he opens the door, his arms filled with snacks, 2 drinks and her phone. Taeyong grins something about seeing her all comfy in his bed, in his shirt and with what happened earlier he can't help but feel all happy inside. He honestly did not think this was going to be the outcome of things, it all felt so surreal to him. He was so thankful.

“ What are you thinking so hard about?” She asks him with a fond smile as he gets into bed, getting closer to her, their shoulders touching.

“ I'm just thinking about how lucky i am” He says, giving her a cheesy smile while handing her her phone. Y/n blushes and rolls her eyes, setting her phone on the side table without checking it.

“ I think i'm the lucky one” She smiles, laying her head on his shoulder and putting her leg over his. Taeyong blushes and opens the bag of sweets and watches her flip through the channels before she finally decides on tangled.

Y/n glances at taeyong to see him smiling happily at the movie stuffing the candy in his mouth.

Why does he have to be so cute?

“ Give me one tae” y/n whines leaning over to grab one basically sitting on his lap but taeyong just moves his arm further away a smirk on his face as he looks at the pout on y/n's face. Y/n looks at him now noticing how close their faces are to each other.

Y/n looks down at his lips and back to his eyes seeing that he's also looking at her lips. Y/n leans closer and kisses him quickly. As y/n goes to pull away, taeyong drops the bag of sweets at his side and gently cups her cheek deepening the kiss making y/n's heart beat faster.

Y/n pulls away from the kiss with a smirk when she grabs the bag of sweets. Y/n laughs and kisses his cheek when she sees his dazed look before sitting back against the headboard.

“ Is that watermelon?” He blushes looking at her lips.

“ Check again if you're not sure” She jokes, puckering her lips, Taeyong laughs and turns his body leaning down to kiss her again. Y/n giggles against his lips before kissing him back, moving her hand to his nape.

“ Hmm…definitely watermelon” He laughs, licking his lips. Y/n laughs and slaps his shoulder moving down so she can lay her head on the pillow. Taeyong lays down and pulls her closer to his chest.

“ So warm and cozy” He mumbled into her neck. Y/n smiles and reaches her hand up to play with his hair. Taeyong hums in delight and closes his eyes feeling tired.

“ You're so cute,” She whispers, kissing his forehead. Taeyong smiles and pecks her neck before yawning.

“ Isn't it too early to go to sleep?” Y/n teases him, running her hand through his hair.

“It's never too early now let's go to sleep” he hushes her, pulling the blanket to their shoulders. Y/n sighs knowing that there is no use of arguing with him and moves a little to get comfortable.

“ stop moving” he whines, tangling their legs together. y/n sighs and closes her eyes trying to fall asleep. Taeyong moves his hand to her hair and starts playing with it knowing that it will make her sleepy and soon they both were sleeping while the ending of the movie was playing.

Taeyong didn't want to move. It didn't feel real, waking up holding the girl that he's been in love with for years, in his arms. He was scared that he would wake up from a dream and the last 24 hours never happened.

Taeyong smiles and leans down to give a soft kiss on her forehead when she moves closer to him, hiding her face in his arm.

“ Good morning,” Taeyong whispers, looking down at her. y/n hums tiredly and opens her eyes, blinking away the sleepiness, breaking out into a grin at the smile on taeyongs face as he looks down at her.

“ Good morning tae” she smiles tiredly leaning back, rubbing her eyes and pushing the blanket off of her.

“ how did you sleep” he wonders, did she have the best sleep of her life? Because he did.

Y/n goes to say something but the sound of her stomach growling stops her.

“ I didn't eat dinner, stop laughing” Y/n whines embarrassed, hiding her face when taeyong starts laughing, teasing her.

“ I guess that's my fault huh” he says thinking about the events that happened last night.

“ Mhm it kinda is, so you have to make me breakfast to make up for it” she smiles sitting up moving her bed hair from her face. Taeyong smiles and gets out of the bed and grabs his phone.

“ What are you in the mood for?” He asks her with a smile already knowing the answer. She always asks for them.

“ Pancakes please” She pleads with a smile. Taeyong laughs with a smile before walking out of the room and into the kitchen.

Y/n yawns and reaches over for her phone, opening it and leaning back against the headboard.

Immediately checking to see if she's gotten any new texts specifically from doyoung. Y/n cant help but feel terrible as she thinks about their date.

Y/n frowns when she sees no new texts from him, she presses on his contact smiling when she sees his contact photo. It was when the two of them and Doyoung went to go get ice cream and Doyoungs lips were covered with whip cream.

I wonder if we're ever going to be able to do that again, without it being awkward. Y/n thinks with a heavy sigh. Her fingers hover over her keyboard wondering if she should text him. Would he even respond to me?.

Y/n groans and leans her head back, closing her eyes and setting her phone in her lap. She doesn't regret what happened because if she didn't leave the date she probably wouldn't have the guts to go to taeyongs. She just wishes there was a way she wouldn't hurt doyoung in this situation.

Y/n must have been thinking for a while because before she knew it, Taeyong was calling her name from the kitchen. Y/n quickly gets out of the bed and rushes into the kitchen smiling at the smell of pancakes.

“ It smells delicious” Y/n compliments moving to stand next to him by the counter, watching him with a smile as he neatly sets the pancakes on two plates.

“ Hopefully it tastes delicious. '' He smiles, grabbing both of their plates.

“ I'll get the drinks” She laughs watching him walk into the living room, where they normally eat. Y/n quickly pours them both a glass of orange juice and walks into the living room, sitting next to him and putting the drinks on the coffee table.

“ thank you” y/n smiles at taeyong grabbing her plate from his hands.

“ of course” He smiles, turning on a show that they normally watch together. The two of them eat in silence both as they watch the show, Taeyong laughing when something funny happens.

“ Taeyong?” Y/n asks, setting her plate on the table.

“ Yeah,” Taeyong says, pausing the show and turning to look at her.

“ Have you heard from doyoung?” Y/n asks quietly, bringing her knees to her chest as she looks down at her knees. Taeyong sighs and places his plate on the table and puts one of his hands on y/n’s knee, making her look at him.

“ No i haven't, I tried texting him but he didn't respond” He frowns…Doyoung always responds to him.

“ I…I think we should go talk to him” Y/n starts, moving her hand to squeeze his hand.

“ He's our friend…He's your best friend and I don't wout our friendship to get ruined because of this, He doesn't deserve that” Y/n frowns playing with taeyongs fingers. Taeyong nods and watches her with a faint smile knowing that she's right.

“ You're right…we should go see him,” Taeyong nods, squeezing her hand one more time before getting up from the couch.

“ You don't mean right now do you?” Y/n asks nervously watching him collect the plates.

“ Well, we're obviously going to get dressed first but yeah we should leave soon” He says, glancing at her, furrowing his eyebrows in confusion when he sees her anxiously bite at her bottom lip.

“ Why, Did you not want to go today?”

“ Oh no, I guess I'm just a little nervous” She sighs, standing up and following him into the kitchen, where he starts washing the dishes.

“ I'm nervous too” He starts, glancing at her while he waits for the water to warm up.

“ But youre right, doyoung is my best friend…he's our friend and i don't want to ruin our friendship because of my feelings for you” he says sadly.

“ I feel bad” Y/n sighs, picking at her nails as she looks away from him.

“ Don’t feel bad y/n/n…” Taeyong frowns, Drying off his hands so he can reach out to hold hers.

“ We kissed….Me and doyoung” Y/n confesses, frowning when Taeyong lets go of her hands in shock.

“ I gave him hope, he thought I liked him as well. He was so happy for our date. And even though I knew deep down it wasn’t going to work out I still said yes to the date….I never should of said yes”

Y/n watches Taeyong look down at his feet with a blank expression but with how his shoulders dropped, Y/n knows that he's upset so she quickly apologizes.

“I’m sorry Taeyong, I should have told you sooner” Taeyong shakes his head and looks back at her with a sad smile.

“ don't be sorry y/n, I understand why you didn't tell me. And doyoung will understand when we go and explain everything to him” He says with a hopeful look in his eye thinking of his best friend.

“ Now let's get ready and head over to his place” Taeyong says, choosing to do the dishes when they get back.

The both of them quickly get ready and before they knew it there standing in front of the doyoungs apartment door. Y/n glances at taeyong who's nervously looking at the door.

Y/n reaches to hold his hand and sends him a reassuring smile hoping that it's not obvious how nervous she is as well. Taeyong gives her a grateful smile before reaching up to knock on the door.

They wait patiently for him to open the door and when y/n hears the door unlock she cant help but hold her breath in fear.

“ Hey” Taeyong smiles slightly when doyoung opens the door. Doyoung looks at them with wide eyes, not expecting them to come over…..together.

“ Hi” Doyoung says back as his eyes rank over them and stop at their united hands and he can't help but feel a pang of hurt at the sight. Y/n noticing where he's looking clears her throat making them both glance at her.

“ Um, can we come in?” Y/n asks, squeezing taeyongs hand tighter from her nerves. Doyoung just nods and opens the door wider for them to enter, closing the door behind them.

After a few moments of standing in silence in the entrance of doyoungs apartment, Y/n goes to say something but stops when taeyong lets go of her hands and throws himself at doyoung. Forcing him into a hug.

“ I'm so sorry, doyoung we both are!” Taeyong says loudly, closing his eyes. Y/n looks at him with wide eyes at his outburst when he planned out what to say on the drive here.

“ We really are sorry, You Are our best friend and we should have thought more of your feelings” Taeyong whispers, hugging him tighter. Doyoung groans and pushes taeyong off him annoyed by how tight he was hugging him.

“ I really am doyoung, i'm sorry i left like that” Y/n sighed, the guilt coming back to her. Doyoung looks at both of them and wants to frown when he sees the sincerity in their eyes and the frowns on their faces.

Doyoung knows that they feel terrible about what happened, he also feels terrible. He knew Taeyong liked y/n it was painfully obvious. But he still asked her out and kissed her.

“ It's okay y/n, i understand why you left” He says, sending her a reassuring smile.

“ I'm sorry to” He sighs looking at them fiddling with the end of his sweater. The sweater he stole from taeyong.

“ Do you wanna know what rule 48 is” Y/n asks, glancing at taeyong to see him already smiling at doyoung.

“ Is it really lime for those rules” doyoung sighs but on the inside he's extremely curious, especially when she brought it up now.

“ Rule 48…..Never let a relationship ruin a friendship” Y/n says softly looking at him with hopeful eyes. Doyoung glances at both of them and feels his eyes water at the confession suddenly feeling stupid from all the mean thoughts he had about himself earlier.

They still want to be his friend, no they still want to still be his best friends and doyoung wants that more than anything. Doyoung sighs and opens his arms wide and before he can blink he feels to bodys hug him tight.

“ Doyoung….are you crying?” y/n asks him when she hears a loud sniffle. Doyoung laughs and shakes his head, hugging them back.

“ No that's taeyong” He teases making taeyong pinch his hip causing doyoung to let out a loud yelp and pull away from the hug.

“ Shut up” Taeyong pouts, pushing both of their shoulders when they both start to laugh.

“ I don't know about you two but i'm in desperate need of a movie night” Y/n grins, changing the subject before they start arguing. They both agree and make their way into the living room after the couple take off their shoes and jackets.

“ I think it's time i find out about all of these rules” ' Doyoung laughs sitting next to taeyong on the couch. The couple laugh and nod their head agreeing with him.

“ Okay taeyong you make the ramyeon and i'll look for the list in my notes” Y/n tells the two making doyoung scoff at her.

“ Are you serious?” Doyoung says loudly, glaring at her making taeyong stop from getting up from the couch.

“ Do you not want ramyeon?” Y/n trails off looking at him weirdly.

“ You have a list of the rules in your phone but i had to do the dishes when i forgot what rule 3 is” doyoung exclaims in shock when the couple starts laughing.

“ When you say it like that it makes us sound…” Y/n says but has to stop from hard she was laughing.

“ What is rule 3?” Taeyong teases him, making Doyoung turn his glare towards him instead.

“ Just go make ramyeon!” Doyoung shouts, slapping his friend's shoulder, getting even more frustrated when they laugh harder.

“ Okay Okay” Taeyong laughs, sending them both a smile before walking out of the living room and into the kitchen.

“ So I was thinking we can watch a scary movie” She tells him while turning on the tv but turns to look at doyoung when she gets no response. Seeing him giving her a ‘ are you serious’ look.

“ A romcom it is” She smiles going into the genre, Both of them looking for a movie that the three of them haven't already watched.

After waiting a little bit for the food to be done, The three of them are sitting on the couch eating and watching the movie. Doyoung insisted they had to watch. And y/n cant help but feel happiness spread over her when she looks at Taeyong and doyoung,

She loves them both….. just in a different way.

Note: well that was the first fic of this series! I really hoped you enjoyed it. This has been my first fic I’ve written in a long time so it might not be that good lol. I was really excited about writing this because Monsta x and Nct are my two favorites. I’m sorry if it’s not what you expected and if it seems a little rushed. I honestly didn’t expect the series master list to get so much exposure so I really tried to get it out as fast as I could! I had some struggles writing certain parts but I’m happy with how it turned out. I hope you enjoyed it! :]

taglist: @hwangful @aedreamzy @kimga @chitaphrrrr @justineasian @flower-lise @thelmathinks @shfazleen @spideyweirdo @germoryisinvain @valentineyun0 @indiana452 @00mkhc @subhyuck @terjeno @vantxx95 @moonwalkun @j4pan @itz-taylor-alexis @jenoleesimp @rasberrypuurrr @kkooongie

[softpine]

Hi Brandi! I'm sorry if this is random but I could really use some advice because I've gotten a couple of out of pocket anons and I'm kind of frustrated. Basically just anons like "Erwin is trans but you made him so edgy when he's soft :(," "Erwin's cute for a trans guy," and even a lot of "Why did you make Erwin trans?" Is this a thing on simblr? I've been so close to making a post but don't want to start drama! I'm just... tired. Sorry to bother you, I just didn't know who else to ask. <3

(i wrote this whole thing and then realized i’ve been assuming you’re cis this whole time, i’m really sorry if that’s not the case!! i think the advice still holds up no matter who’s reading this though)

ugh yeah unfortunately i’ve gotten similar messages about stevie. you have to learn how to decide whether the message you received is a good faith critique (whether you agree with it or not), or just plain hateful rhetoric, or a question out of nothing more than curiosity. it’s easy to disregard the blatantly bigoted questions, but sometimes people will phrase things in an ambiguous way. in those cases, i try to really focus on what the person is asking or commenting on. would they ask the same question of a cis character? would they notice the same things about a cis character? would they hold the same opinions about this character if they were cis? is there any validity to what this person is critiquing my writing for? (in this case, the best thing you can do is ask a trans person for advice. i’m lucky enough to have trans friends irl who don’t mind me asking questions, but there are plenty of people online who would also be willing to chat if you look!). it’s important to keep your mind open to the fact that you might actually be making a mistake, or portraying something inaccurately, etc. and you can correct yourself if you need to. but if the criticism is patently not valid, just block them and move on. don’t even give them the pleasure of a response!

i would also say it’s a good idea to set your boundaries now and stick to them. for example, i already know that because stevie is a minor, i’m not going to answer any questions about bottom surgery or her sex life, both of which have been asked about WAY too many times (way, way more than any of the other characters around her age). i also choose not to engage with people who hate stevie for thinly veiled reasons. it’s perfectly okay to dislike a character, and i don’t mind you expressing this to me, but i’ve gotten pretty good at realizing when people are genuinely criticizing stevie vs. looking for reasons to hate her because they won’t just come out and say the transphobic shit they want to say.

tldr: if it’s a bad faith criticism, straight up ignore it! don’t respond in any way, it’ll just stoke the flames. if you’re not sure what the anon’s intentions were, give them the benefit of the doubt by asking them to clarify before you give them any kind of response. i’ve found that most of the time when an anon has to explain what they meant by something, it’s usually a genuine misunderstanding that gets cleared up easily. i hope that helps!! 💖

[mainveyn]

《 unspoken love 》 suna rintarou x reader

wc : 1.3k

genre : soft angst that u guys can handle :)

a/n : finding a divider that match w the picture is much harder than i thought 

series : silent love ▪︎ unspoken love ▪︎ nebulous love ▪︎ ardent love

practice was already over about an hour ago, but you insisted on staying back for free practice by yourself. your captain and teammates are concerned to have you clean up the gym all by yourself but you reassured them. after all, you need to stay back late enough to not cross paths with suna on your way to the school gate. surprisingly, you heard from his teammates that he went home quite early since the past few weeks but you didn't question it. you probably knew the reason already. 

even so, you still tried to avoid him at all costs. you didn't show up at your usual spot for lunch nor did you walk past his classroom anymore. he texted you daily but your replies are short and uninformative at all. you knew he probably noticed it but if he is not mentioning anything, you think it's better this way.

but it's not, not when you missed his presence so much. you missed those days when he walked you home and held your hands to cross the street. you missed him stealing food from your bento when he lied that he only brought chuupet for lunch. you missed him telling you to drop by his class and ask you to tutor him before he has to take an english test in the next two hours. you didn't realize he had involved himself in your life that much that you can never get him out of the picture anymore.

you regret for missing out all the opportunity to clarify your doubt with him. as much as you loved this wordless relationship with him, you didn't expect it'd throw you into the trouble of wandering to yourself just what exactly are you and suna. is he just being nice? does he only think of you as a friend? yeah, you should've asked while you had the chance. but now you can only imagine him rejecting your love when he already have someone in his heart.

the walk to your clubroom was pretty dreadful but you still dragged your feets toward it. the hallways are really quiet and peaceful now, which used to be your favourite place to take a stroll. but now you want nothing more than to quickly change out of your sweaty jersey and go home. you’re reminded of how you're totally off game today in practice as your mind only wanders around the memories of him. disappointment is just an understatement because you can't believe you're losing both the most important person in your life and the sport that you took pride in.

your hand stopped at the doorknob as you lifted your head to stop the tears that were threatening to fall, taking deep breaths in the process. you gave yourself a few minutes to steady your breathing before putting up a facade, trying to act normal again. as if god hates you right now, you caught someone round the corners of the hallway and halted a few metres away from you. and it's definitely the person that you didn't want to see right now. 

"hey," his gaze focused on you entirely, retrieving one of his hands from his pockets to wave at you. you merely gave him a side glance and faked a smile at him. "i'm gonna go get changed first. bye su-" "i'll wait for you," he cuts you off with his unfaltered stare as if he is telling you he won't take no for an answer. you could feel your shoulders tensed up at his stern tone but you knew you can't run from him now.

you didn't expect a confrontation would happen so soon nor are you good at it too so you find yourself shrinking under his stares. an exasperated sigh from you made him move closer to you, but he stopped as you turned to face him fully now. "you don't have to. aren't you supposed to be home early today?" you decided to go against him today, so that it's easier for you to reject his kind offer in the future. you insist it's better this way.

suna averted his eyes to the side for a moment before quickly bringing his eyes back to trace your feature. you didn't look angry or uncomfortable but he didn't miss the sadness swirling in the reflection of your orbs. "did i...make you upset or something? i don't remember i did anything but," he rubbed the nape of his neck out of nervousness before he continued.

“i’m sorry if i did. so stop avoiding me already," his stoic expression remains but you perfectly captured his emerald eyes laced with concern. he did nothing wrong and yet he is here apologizing because he is worried about you. you really didn't have the heart to push him away. probably never.

everything seems normal, like how you guys used to. you both walked in silence, except for the fact that your heart is getting heavier at each step you take. you two walked past the same convenience store, it's neon light sign lightened up the street in the dark just like every other night. suna stood in front of the same junction, eyes scanning for any cars even though the lights flashed green for you both to cross. he does it every time, making sure it's safe for you to cross before offering his hand for you to hold. you expected it so you walked ahead of him, not giving him any chance to do that.

you didn't notice you start picking up your pace as the distance to your house is getting closer. but you do after you feel a firm tug from the sleeve of your jacket. suna gave you an unamused look, but you tried to feint innocence and told him "i'm reallyyyy tired today! just wanna get home and rest." you hoped your smile was convincing enough.

you stiffened at the sight of his annoyed expression because he obviously doesn't believe it. you almost regret letting him into your life too much that he can read you so easily. he didn’t spare you a second and grabbed your hand instantly, ignoring that you tried to retract it and only held his grip on you firmly. the warmth from his palm is so comforting yet it hurts. but you’d exchange anything for his touch, including your heart. 

for the first time, the silence surrounding you two is unbearable. your house is just right in front you, yet he has no intention of letting go. you didn’t have the courage to speak up, just silently giving him side glances. suna looked up to the sky like he was thinking of something to say. you noticed his lips trembled a little so you squeezed his hand, trying to get his attention.

“what’s wrong, suna?” you whispered softly but he still remained in the same position. at this point, you loved him too much that you can’t leave him alone even though you’re hurting under his presence. even if you can’t be with him, you want him to be happy.

he turned to you swiftly, shifting both of his palms to your cheek now and pulled you in closer. you hitched at the sight of his face being just inches away as you balled your fist on his jacket. “y/n,” you watch his eyes drooped into a pleading look, his forehead touching yours now with so much affection. you didn't know what to expect, but you could feel he held back all the words he wanted to tell you before moving away with his shoulders slumped in defeat.

“there’s an important match tomorrow,” he said with his gaze on the floor, shoving his hand into his pocket to hide his nervousness. if you think you’re the only one who is afraid of rejection, then you’re wrong. because suna is afraid too, at least for now. 

“will you come and watch me tomorrow?” you can never say no, not even your heartache will allow you to do so.

reblogs are very much appreciated <3

[thepixelelf]

for the title thing, You're a Spi-Dear LOLOL its one of my favourite meme titles ive written

warnings: spiders/bugs, angst-ish

[you're a spi-DEAR] "You can't be serious," you deadpan into your phone. It's almost two in the morning, and aside from already not believing whose name showed up on your obnoxiously vibrating phone screen, you really can't believe what he's asking of you.

"Just this once," Hyunjin says, voice caught between hesitance and embarrassment -- though the combination is somehow even more pathetic. "I promise this is the last time."

You sigh. "Fine. I'll be there in fifteen minutes." Before he can complain, you cut him off. "I'm not getting a speeding ticket for you."

The drive really isn't that far, and you grumble to yourself about it behind the wheel. Maybe if you'd moved farther away, he wouldn't be calling you.

Or maybe he still would.

You try not to think about it too hard.

He opens the door before you even knock, and he takes your wrist in his hand (don't think about it, don't) to drag you towards the bathroom. It feels a lot more empty in there now with the counter cleared of a second occupant's things.

"Okay, where is -- WHOA." Your eyes widen at the sight of a huge spider on the shower wall. You take a startled step back and stumble against Hyunjin's chest, who apparently hid behind you as soon as you entered the bathroom. "Fuck, you weren't kidding!"

His other hand finds your wrist as well, and he moves up to squeeze your arm. Hyunjin half whispers, half yells, "Of course I wasn't kidding -- look at that thing!"

Despite its size, you only take a few more seconds to compose yourself and grab a glass from the nearby kitchen. You let the spider outside within minutes, and soon, you're slipping on your shoes again while Hyunjin stands awkwardly by the door, shuffling from foot to foot.

"Remember," you say as you tie your shoelaces. "You said this was the last time."

He nods, and you think he mumbles some sort of answer, but honestly, you're tired. It's two in the morning, you're at his despairingly empty apartment, and you came just to catch a freaking spider for him. Since when was he that scared of bugs, anyways? He never had this problem before you left.

"Do you..." He spares a look towards the kitchen counter. "I made tea. Your favourite..."

You sigh. Suddenly a piece of lint on the TV stand is the only thing your eyes can focus on. "Hyunjin." You put your hands in your coat pockets. "It hasn't even been a month..."

You don't have to clarify. He knows.

It hasn't even been a month since he broke up with you.

And yet, here you are, catching spiders for him in the middle of the night. Last week it was a cockroach. Two days before that, a smaller spider.

When he says nothing, you sigh again, and you turn for the door.

A hand on yours, light, hesitant, not necessarily stopping you, but asking -- pleading for you not to go.

"I know," he whispers. "I know what I did. I thought it was what I wanted."

You frown. "And now what do you want?"

He meets your eyes for the first time of the night.

"I just want more time with you."

[rattyoakenbitch]

❝𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐡 𝐬𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧𝐠❞ ─ 𝐰𝐢𝐥𝐥 𝐠𝐫𝐚𝐡𝐚𝐦

after all this time, i start asking why i'm staying

were you ever mine?

are we something that's worth saving?

❥ content ; gn reader, eventual fluff, angst, happy ending

❥ warnings ; cursing, themes of cheating

❥ synopsis ; you're will's s/o. when he comes home from work, you can tell he's off. what you didn't expect was him to kick you out.

❥ a/n ; none!

"Will?"

You call out after hearing the front door to your house open and shut. When you don't get a response, you get up from your laying position on the couch and approach the front door.

There, Will stood. His back was turned to you as he hung up his coat, and although you could not see his face, you could immediately tell he was off. Even the energy around him felt dark and tense.

"Oh, hey, hun.." You said anxiously, trying not to set him off in any way.

Will didn't react to your voice. Instead, he backed away from the clothing rack and walked past you, not even bothering to spare you a look. This wasn't the first time Will acted out like this, especially considering he was exhausted all the time from the work Crawford gave him. But he would at least greet you soon as he walked through the door, not flat out treat you as if you didn't exist.

"Will," you sighed dejectedly, more to yourself than to your boyfriend. You quietly followed him upstairs to the master bedroom, where he began to strip off his work clothes, changing into something more comfortable. Still, he ignored your presence. You had to make another move.

You slowly approached him from behind, placing your hands on his shoulders. You were immediately taken back when he forcefully removed himself from your touch and walked away to another corner of the room.

"Will, I just-"

"What?" he scoffed mockingly, "You just want to help?"

"You're my boyfriend, Will, of course I want to!"

He laughed.

"It certainly doesn't help when you breathe down my neck every fucking minute."

Tears pricked in your eyes, Will's vicious tone scaring you. You searched Will's own eyes, trying to find any trace of remorse or regret. He had none. You didn't even know who you were looking at.

"What are you talking about, Will? When you want space, I give you space. When you want love, I give you love! What more do you want from me?"

"I want you to leave."

And then it was quiet for a moment. You both stood there silently, feet away from each other, eyes burning holes into the others.

"..What?" You stared in disbelief. "Wh- What are you saying right now, Will?"

"I want you to leave. I want you gone, Y/N. I don't need you anymore."

"No," you bit your quivering lips, hot tears spilling down your cheeks. Will averted his stare from your crying form, the floor suddenly becoming more interesting.

"No, you're lying. You're just saying that. You can fool everyone else, but you can't fool me."

"I'm sorry, Y/N." Lies. "It's best if you just leave."

You choked on a sob. "What?! Where is this coming from all of a sudden? We were okay just the other day!"

Will remained silent, still not daring to make eye contact with you.

"Is there someone else?"

"I- No, Y/N. I don't owe you an explanation."

"So this is it, then? You're just gonna kick me out?"

"Please, Y/N. Don't make this harder than it already is."

"This is hard for you?! You're not the one getting kicked out!"

Will sighed, somehow managing to remain calm while you screamed at him.

"I'm sorry." And the conversation ended there.

You began to pack your bags. You also phoned a friend, asking them if you could crash for a bit until you had a stable job and a home. You were not about to sleep on the sofa tonight.

You opened and slammed drawers, taking your anger out on furniture as you took your belongings with you. You also did it to spite Will, who attempted to get some sleep. But he did not complain. He continued to act as if you didn't exist.

It made you wonder. Where did it all go wrong? How long has he thought about leaving you? Was there another person?

Will wouldn't answer your questions. At this point, you didn't wanna know.

You were able to finish packing up within an hour. Will was still wide awake during that time, listening closely to the angry banging of furniture, quiet sniffles and shaky inhales as you tried the best you could to keep your composure.

You loaded all your bags into your car, getting ready to head to your friend's place. You went back inside to get a couple more things and look around the house a final time. You stopped by the front door as you were about to leave, your eyes landing on a picture on the windowsill of you and Will. Your already tired, red eyes welled with tears again. You opened up the frame, sliding the picture out and folding it into your pocket. Not like Will would want it in his house anyway.

And so you left.

You didn't say your goodbyes. You just left.

A week had gone by. Will carried on with his job as usual, attended his therapy sessions, but he never once mentioned you. Not a lot of people knew about you and Will's relationship, or what was once a relationship. Since his coworkers already knew so much, or what Will deemed to be enough information about him, he wanted to keep your relationship secret. Not that you minded.

The only person who knew of your relationship was Alana Bloom and Jack Crawford, but even when it ended, he didn't tell them anything. He didn't tell them how guilty he felt the night he kicked you out. He didn't tell them he still had nightmares about you being harmed. He didn't tell them how he was the one harming you in his nightmares. He didn't tell them how empty he felt when you blocked his number and social medias (ok sorry but like little headcanon here?? will has an instagram and it's just pictures of him fishing / or of his dogs fnsmdnskdjsk).

He never told them how he tried not to stay in his house as often, because it reminded him of you.

He was definitely acting strange at work. It was easy to tell. Even Bev pulled him aside to inquire about his health. But he continued to keep his mouth shut, until he couldn't.

Will rushed to the front door when he heard little taps on the metal screen. Secretly, he hoped it would be you. But when he opened it, there stood Alana Bloom. Will always thought Alana was beautiful. But how could anyone disagree?

Her long, dark waves that framed her perfect, slim face were never unchecked and unkempt. Makeup or none, preppy work uniforms or pajamas, she always seemed to look her best.

You even found yourself feeling small and insecure when Will invited her over for you to meet. But he assured you that she could never even compare to you. You believed it.

Alana's thin lips curled up into a soft smile. "Will. Can I come in?"

"Y-Yeah, sure." He let her in and she walked through the front door for the first time in forever.

"Jeez," she chuckled. "How long as it been?"

"Maybe too long," Will simply replied.

Alana walked around the house, scanning every detail while Will patiently trailed behind her. The dogs were playing outside, so it was just the two of them.

"Why did you decide to come over today?"

"I've been worried about you." She turned around to face Will, who stopped a few feet in front of her. "But now that I'm here in your house, I can see why you've been acting off."

"What's your diagnosis, Doctor?" Will joked, an attempt at lightening the tense air.

"Y/N. They left, haven't they?"

There it is.

Technically, Alana wasn't wrong. You did leave, but Will never clarified in what circumstance.

Will looked at the ground.

"Yeah.. Took all the photos too."

"Hey," Alana began, her finger resting under Will's chin, prompting him to look up at her. "You don't have to hide from me."

A week had gone by. A long, lonely, miserable week. You crashed at your friend's for two nights before your parents invited you to live with them while you worked on getting back on your feet. They didn't live too far, so you thanked your friend for their hospitality and moved in with your parents.

As you finished unpacking your stuff, you realized you were missing some things. You cursed at the realization you would probably have to pick up some stuff from Will's.

You still had the key, so you would have no problem getting in, unless he had the lock changed of course. You were only worried about running into him.

What the hell?

You got dressed. You didn't wear anything fancy, but in case you ran into Will, you felt obligated to look presentable and show him that you could still make it without him. You decided on doing a bit of makeup. Again, nothing fancy. Just enough to conceal the dark circles under your eyes and make your features pop.

And then you headed on the dreadful drive to Will's place.

When you got there, you were too nervous and too focused on making the trip quick to even notice Alana's car in his driveway.

However, what did catch your attention, were the many dogs Will owned. They ran up to you as soon as they recognized you. They panted as they jumped and wagged their tails, expressing their happiness the most they could. You tried your best to pet them all, your mouth lifting up into a smile. You didn't realize it but you really missed the dogs.

You dug around for the key in your pocket and pulled it out, quietly unlocking the front door and letting yourself in.

"You don't have the hide from me.."

Your eyebrows furrowed together at the sound of a female voice.

When you walked into the living room, you were horrified to see Will with another woman. Alana.

Their lips were locked, engaging in a passionate kiss, not even noticing your presence. You felt sick as you put the pieces together.

"Now I know why you kicked me out," you whispered, half to yourself and half to Will, who almost about pushed Alana off him at the sound of your voice.

Both their cheeks heated up in embarrassment when their eyes fell on you.

"Y/N! I'm so sorry, I thought-"

"Look, I only came to pick up some stuff. Then I'll be out of your way." You didn't once look away from Will, deciding to totally disregard Alana's presence and apologetic mutters.

With that, you rushed out of the living room and into your bedroom, searching under the bed and in the closet for your missing items.

You heard faint talking from the living room but tuned out most of it, deciding it wasn't worth your time or even your business in the first place. Then you heard the front door shut and a car start from outside.

Before you could process what might've happened, you heard Will's footsteps stop outside the bedroom.

"Y/N, we should talk."

"No, we shouldn't."

"You blocked my number."

"What good would it do if I kept it?"

"Please, hear me out."

Disgruntled, you turned to face Will, sending a cold glare his way.

"Look, unless you found a way to make a time machine and give me back the time I wasted on you, I don't want to speak with you."

"Why won't you just listen to me?!" he snapped.

You scoffed, "Well surprise, douchebag, I have feelings and you hurt them!"

"Well, I'm sorry, alright?" he calmed down now.

"Are you? Really?" You shook your head. "A sorry won't fix this, Will. Not after what you did. Gods- I can't even look at you right now."

You laughed. "You know what fucking sucks? After all you did, after the cheating and the lies, I'm still in love with you."

Will teared up. "I was never with Alana, Y/N. It's always been you."

"Then, why, Will? Why did you throw me out so coldly like that?"

"I began to have dreams, Y/N. Nightmares," Will admitted, his voice beginning to break. "Nightmares about people hurting you. Criminals. It was too real. As much as I loved- As much as I love you, I never wanted you to choose me. I don't want people using you as a weapon against me. To hurt me."

You slowly walked towards Will, stopping a foot away from him. You looked up into his glossy bambi eyes as he spoke.

"It was when the nightmares got worse, when I was the one hurting you, that I realized you weren't safe with me."

You cried. "Oh, Will. I wish you had told me."

"I couldn't. I didn't want you to remember me that way."

You laughed. "Well, I ended up remembering you as the asshole who kicked me out, instead."

Will managed to give you a smile through his tears.

He brought his hand to your shoulder, and gently lead it up your neck to the side of your face, cupping it lightly and brushing his thumb across your cheek.

"I would never hurt you, Y/N."

"I know. I know, Will. You aren't a monster for having nightmares you can't control." You brought your own hand up and placed it against Will's, leaning into his warm touch. "I'm still here. I'm alive. In your hands. And I feel safe with you."

Almost hesitantly, Will leaned in, connecting his lips to yours. His body felt tense, but when you kissed him back, you felt his worries disappear into the air.

He pulled away, resting his forehead against yours.

"Stay with me tonight?"

[tenebriism]

"you look tired, master diluc. are you not sleeping much ?"

kaeya's voice is half-muffled by the glass of death after noon he's got held to his lips; he takes a sip, eyes his brother from across the bar counter. it'd be easy to write it off as just more of his teasing, lips loosened with the aid of some liquid courage, but if one looks close enough, he's frowning ever so slightly. he finishes his drink in one gulp and sets the glass down with a little clink, then fumbles around in his pocket, producing a small mason jar of ... something.

"tea leaves," he clarifies, before sliding the jar across the counter towards diluc. "meant to aid in relaxing and with sleep. if you keep showing up to your shifts with such dark circles under your eyes, some people might get the wrong idea about things."

kaeya smiles wistfully, stares into his empty glass, then drops some mora on the counter and stands, slowly and stiffly. "for my drink," he says, "and a little extra for all the times i've been a burden. goodnight, diluc. rest well."

i wish you'd take better care of yourself, too.

Prompted Ask - [ ALWAYS ACCEPTING ] ;; @aalberich

                           The retort burning the tip of his tongue fizzles out, in favor of extending the silence betwixt them that had long since felt like the norm. He finds he's too exhausted today, unwisely having gone straight to work after a full night's worth of vigilante escapades, yet it seemed he hadn't HIDDEN it as well as he'd assumed. Everyone else who had waltzed into the homely walls of the bar had greeted him, as usual, and placed an order before getting comfortable in their seat of choice.

              Nobody noticed the way he pinched the bridge of his nose and squeezed his eyes, hoping to ward away the burning heaviness that was doing little to aid the pounding at his temples, in tandem. At least . . . nobody besides Kaeya.

           " I'm fine . . . " Comes his eventual response, the gentle baritone of his voice notably quieter this evening as he bit back a yawn. It was as if his body WANTED to put on display how physically unequipped he was to face what would surely be a lengthy shift, but work was work. Responsibilities did not simply cease to exist due to exhaustion. Yet, he watches, curiously, as Kaeya procures something from his belongings, and he assumes, for a moment, that it's his payment . . . FEARS that, once again, he has driven the Cavalry Captain off with his standoffish approach.

           He's shocked to see it's something for him, however, in the form of a remedy for his ailment. A SERIOUS offering not meant to poke fun at something that really, truly was giving him a hard time, but rather . . . something that would hopefully help. " You should save this for yourself, Sir Kaeya . . . if it's as USEFUL as you claim, " He mumbles under his breath, but reaches out to take the jar, anyway, to place underneath the counter for safekeeping. The thoughtful offering holds his attention for some time, even as the mora is deposited atop the counter, and Kaeya sets to leave.

           --- and as the words hit his ears, Diluc's lips part, yet no words, no sound, depart. ' Burden . . . ' To anyone else, it would be so easy to challenge this, but to a man too closed off from his own emotions to even consider HIMSELF of any worth, he knows he's not in a place to try and convince someone else -- particularly, his painfully estranged brother -- otherwise.

                Not yet . . .

                           " Thank you for your patronage. Goodnight. "

              Come nighttime, though, he sleeps better than he has in months.