#to be fair they do get kills as the session goes on

[beacon-lamp]

love how in theory, the watchers have bestowed cleo with the ability to bring other players back from the dead—the only power granted that directly goes against the fundamental nature of the life series. but in practice, her newfound necromancy skills have just made her a single mother of two incredibly needy, prone-to-dying children.

[traveler-at-heart]

Good Luck Babe

Summary: Wanda's boyfriend is the biggest asshole you've ever met. You think she'll choose you in the end.

Wanda Romanoff x F!R, eventual Natasha Romanoff x F!R

A/N: Don't be fooled by the summary, this is a Natasha Romanoff x R fic

Classes can be a drag. Especially the early mornings, where not even a cup of coffee can make you focus.

And then, there’s Wanda Maximoff, looking at the professor as she speaks, diligently taking notes while looking perfect, as usual.

She catches you staring and you have to look away, pretending that you weren’t just wondering how she manages to look effortlessly beautiful.

Class is dismissed and you take a minute to pack your things, preparing for the next session. You try not to roll your eyes as you find Wanda with her idiot boyfriend right at the door. As usual, they take up too much space, and you have to push one of them aside.

“Coming through, princess”

You don’t have to look back to know Wanda glares at you, annoyed at the nickname.

To be fair, the first time you used it you thought you were both involved in playful banter. Hell, you even meant it to be flirty, but she took great offense in it, which was the case with most things you did, whether they were aimed at her or not.

It was pretty clear she hated your guts. You just didn’t know why.

——

“I don’t know what her problem is” Wanda says, the music loudly booming across the house.

“What?” Jarvis says, leaning forward because he didn’t hear a word Wanda said. Partly due to the loud music and also because he’s looking at other girls, albeit discreetly.

“Y/N. She’s always being a total ass” the girl says, watching as you enter the house, avoiding her stare.

“She’s just jealous because you’re so pretty” he says and that’s enough to distract Wanda.

Across the room, you curse under your breath at the sight of the Maximoff girl. God, you hate her stupid boyfriend. Always runnig his mouth to his friends about Wanda, telling them private things… you’d overheard them at a bar once and it took every ounce of your being not to kill him right then and there.

Not to mention, the rumoured affairs that everyone knew about. Everyone, but Wanda, that is.

“You made it!” Carol greets you, and then follows your gaze. “Ugh, that guy’s the worst”

“Agree” you nod, turning to look at her. “Shots?”

“Hell, yeah” your friend says, taking you to the kitchen where Val is pouring some alcohol.

To your relief, you get to avoid Wanda for the entirety of the night, and as your friends arrive you quickly forget what had soured your mood in the first place.

Wanda, on the other hand, is not having such a great time. At some point while she was chatting with Pepper, she lost sight of Jarvis and can’t seem to find him anywhere. Knowing Stark could get crazy ideas, she worries that they might be doing something reckless so she goes around the house, looking for her boyfriend.

She’s expecting everything but seeing him with his pants around his ankles while a girl Wanda doesn’t even know gives him head.

“Wanda!” Jarvis shouts, startled.

“That’s not my name” the girl says, smiling playfully. “Or are we role playing?”

“I need to get out of here” Wanda says, closing the door.

Of course, he chases her down the hall, desperately sayig any excuse he can think of. Wanda tries to walk past him, but he blocks her from going downstairs.

“Don’t be so uptight about it” he loses his patience when Wanda refuses his apology. “Guys just need to do it more than girls, it meant nothing”

“You’re an ass” she says, tears rolling down her cheeks.

“Wanda, don’t leave” he warns, as she finally walks around him to go to the first floor. The shouting makes some people turn around, and it’s almost impossible to ignore the commotion.

You’re standing next to Val and Darcy, unable to look away as the oh so happy couple keeps shouting at each other.

“Guess he got caught red handed this time” Darcy mutters. She and Wanda were friends but had a fallout and you suspected it had to do with Jarvis and his side pieces.

“Let go of me” Wanda insists when he takes her arm, pulling her close to him.

“People are staring, shut your fucking mouth”

“You’re hurting me” she protests, trying to losen his grip.

Maybe it’s the way she says it, so defeated or even scared, but those words make you snap, and you walk up to them, pushing Jarvis away.

“Stay out of it” he warns.

“Make me”

You are expecting the first punch so you dodge it in time, but he manages to land another one on your mouth, and you feel the taste of blood.

“You’re gonna regret this” you say, launching yourself forward until you knock him over, landing on a coffee table that breaks. Grabbing him by the shirt, you land two punches and go for a third one when he kicks you, making you gasp for air.

“That’s enough” Thor steps in, his brother looking delighted at the chaos. “You better leave”

Jarvis glares at him, but truth be told, Thor doesn’t like him and he is your friend. He leaves the Odinson house, cursing under his breath.

“I’m fine” you tell your friends as they bring over ice to put on your cheek.

“Want us to take you home?” Carol offers.

“It’s good” you say, shaking your head. “I should go, take some painkillers”

“Call us if you need anything”

“Ok” you pat Darcy’s back, leaving the house where everyone’s partying like nothing even happened.

As you walk to your car, you spot Wanda, sitting on the sidewalk, wiping away the tears that roll down her cheeks.

“You ok?” you ask, standing next to her.

“He’s an idiot. No, I’m the idiot for being with him” she rambles.

There’s a very sarcastic comment at the tip of yout tongue but you save it.

“Did he drove you here?” Wanda nods and you jiggle the car keys. “Come on, I’ll drive you to your dorm”

“I don’t want to be alone” Wanda hugs her knees, and in spite of everything, your heart aches for her.

“Any friends that can take you in for the night?” she shakes her head no and you sigh. “Wanna stay at my place?”

“Are you sure it’s ok?”

“Yeah, come on” you say, walking to the car. You drive in silence, eager to get home and put some more ice on the punch.

Wanda gets out of the car and follows you to the dorm you share with Carol, who usually stays with Val most nights.

“Take the bed” you say, handing over some clean clothes so she can change.

Wanda looks at you, and you feel uncomfortable at the intensity of her gaze.

“I… thank you, Y/N”

“Sleep tight, princess” you say with a smile and for the first time she doesn’t look upset as you call her that.

——

The smell of bacon and butter wakes you up and you stretch, trying to remember why you’re in the couch.

When you see Wanda in your kitchen, everyhing that happened comes back and you groan, rubbing the sleep off your eyes.

“Ouch” you say when you rub close to the punch on your cheek.

“You’re up” Wanda says, smiling. It’s a strange sight, as she’s used to glaring at you or just ignoring your presence.

“You sleep ok?” you say, trying to hide your blush when you notice she’s still wearing the clothes you let her borrow.

“Yeah, thanks” she nods, pulling up two plates with pancakes. “I wanted to thank you for everythig you did last night”

“No need” you say, grabbing a fork and eating. Wanda’s just being nice and you honestly don’t want to force her to interact with you, so all you want is to finish your food and give her an out so she can leave.

“He’s been texting me” Wanda says, looking at her food but not eating anything. “Saying it was a mistake, a one time thing and that it would never happen again”

“And you believe him?” you try to control your tone.

“I’d heard the rumors… even from Darcy. You probably know already”

“We assumed that’s why you fought, but she told us it was none of our business. And I know this isn’t none of mine, but you deserve better”

Wanda giggles at that and you look at her, intrigued.

“I’m just… I thought you didn’t like me”

“Where’d you get that?”

“The nickname, your constant glares across the room…”

Oh, shit. Here you were thinking you were obvious about your crush, and Wanda thinks you hate her.

“I hate… Jarvis. I knew he was a dick so I always disliked him. Seeing him with you. Yeah”

“Do you like me?” Wanda asks and you take a deep breath, shrugging your shoulders.

The girl smiles, finishing her food. You stay in the kitchen, fidgeting with your fork until she comes back, changed into her own clothes.

“I should get back. Do you need anything? Painkillers, ice?” she leans forward, her hand touching your bruise gently. Then, you notice her eyes drifting to your lips.

“I’m fine” you say and she nods, stepping back.

“See you in class?”

“Yes” you say, smiling as she waves goodbye. Carol walks in ten seconds later, looking behind her.

“Was that…?”

“Yes”

“Did you…?”

“No” you cut her off. “She just didn’t want to be alone after what happened”

“Y/N…” Carol says in that tone you dislike so much. You’re about to get scolded over something that isn’t that big of a deal.

“Carol, come on. She slept in my room, I stayed on the couch. That’s it”

“I just don’t want to see you getting hurt” your friend says and you nod. “I mean, you got a split lip and a black eye already so maybe it’s a little late for that”

“Yeah, that’s true. Come on, there are some pancakes left”

——

You tell yourself it means nothing. Wanda sits next to you during class, and offers a second scone she got from the cafeteria.

“How’s the eye?”

“I’m not blind” you shrug your shoulders. “Jarvis hits like a little bitch”

Wanda snorts at that, and you can’t hold back your own laugh. That attracts the attention of Professor Harkness, who focuses on your eye.

“Do I even want to to know, Y/L/N?”

“Nah” you shake your head and she rolls her eyes.

“Alright”

With that, the lesson begins. You try hard to focus, but Wanda smells really nice and you’re only human. At one point, she shuffles in her seat, her leg coming in contact with yours and you give up on taking notes.

“You ok?” to your surprise, Wanda follows you out of the classroom. “I can let you borrow my notes, if you want”

“Wanda” you stop abruptly, sighing. “Listen, you don’t owe me anything. I helped because it was the right thing to do. So don’t worry about paying me back in any way”

“That’s not… ” she stutters, fixing her hair. “I don’t really have any friends. I was always with him”

“Oh” you feel like an idiot. “Well, ok. I could use those notes”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah, come on. I’ll trade them for a coffee” you smile, walking next to her to the library.

—

It surprises you, how much you and Wanda have in common. She likes sitcoms and though you’re more of a Friends kind of girl, it’s fun to watch those old shows where they dance and sing from time to time.

“I only know Dick Van Dyke from Mary Poppins” you confess one time, which prompts Wanda to invite you to her dorm for a marathon.

“Where are you going?” Darcy says when you walk past her and Carol that evening.

“Oh, this is gonna be fun” Carol smiles and you glare at your friend.

“Well, Wanda and I…”

“Oh, my God! You traitor. Brutus!” Darcy shouts, throwing a napkin at you. “She’s the worst”

“I wouldn’t know. You didn’t tell me what happened”

“She got you there” Carol points out, eating popcorn while she enjoys the show.

“That is besides the point”

“Look, I’m not putting Wanda on my will or anything, we’re just hanging out. And if she mentions you, I’ll be the first one to defend you”

Darcy sighs, chewing on her lip.

“It’s not about me. Wanda has the habit of just… using people when she’s bored or on a break from that idiot. And then they get back together and forgets about you. Which sucks. I wouldn’t want it to be the case for you, that’s all”

“I’ll be careful” you promise.

Once at Wanda’s, you’re trying to enjoy the show, but Darcy’s words are echoing in your head. You had to admit that if you spent more time with Wanda, you’d probably develop an even bigger crush. And if she went back to that asshole, it would hurt you.

Was it really worth it?

“Is the show boring? We can watch something else. I know it’s weird that I like this” Wanda pauses mid episode.

“No, it’s just… Darcy said some things…”

“Oh. I wouldn’t blame you if you don’t want to hang out anymore” she sighs, looking down at her hands.

“I’m just thinking… maybe it would be good if you fix things with her? Say sorry. I’m sure she’ll appreciate it”

“I can try, but you know her. She won’t make it easy” you both laugh at that. “Is that all?”

“Yeah” you lie. “Come on, let’s keep watching. I wanna know if Rob goes to Ritchie’s play”

Wanda smiles, this time moving closer to you. Her head rests on your shoulder, relaxing against you. It’s so intoxicating, to have her so close, to feel her warmth.

And all you can think over and over again is “please don’t break my heart”. But you can’t ask for the impossible.

—

You’re really not expecting Wanda to take your suggestion at heart, but one day you see her speaking with Darcy in the hallway, your friend pretending to not be interested in the conversation at all.

The only sign that she actually forgives Wanda is when you’re sitting with the girl at the cafeteria and Darcy sits next to you, carrying a tray.

“This is the only seat that I could find” she mutters unconvincingly, making you and Wanda smile.

Though you spent most of the time in each other’s dorms, watching movies or shows. You learn that Jarvis was the one that dragged Wanda to all those parties and anytime you invite her to one she politely declines.

Now, you’re staying in while the rest of your friends are at the Odinson mansion. You don’t know if they’re allergies or a mild cold, but you’ve been feeling sick all day and wanted to rest.

“Coming” you groan when someone knocks. You open the door to find Wanda on the other side. “You’ll get sick, what are you doing here?”

“I made you soup”

“Thanks” you take the container, and you gotta admit the idea of warm soup makes your mouth water. “I’d say do you want to come in, but I really do worry this might be contagious”

“I’ll be fine” she walks inside, finding her usual place in the couch and patting the spot next to her. “Come on. We’ll even watch that boring show you like”

“The Office is not boring!” you huff, making her laugh.

A couple of episodes later, and you feel your eyes slowly closing, a side effect from the  medicine you took. Wanda notices, and makes you walk to your room.

As you lay in bed, you’re drifting off to sleep when you feel Wanda sliding next to you, her hand on your forehead.

“Your fever is down”

“Mhm. Thanks to the magic soup”

“I’m staying, in case you need anything”

“Ok, baby” you nod, too sleepy to notice what you’re saying.

Wanda’s heart flutters at the term of endearment, and she watches you sleep peacefully, her mind racing with thoughts about what could this possibly mean to you both.

On the other hand, you don’t remember anything and are startled when you feel someone sleeping next to you.

“Wanda?” you say when you turn around, smiling at how cute she looks, all confused.

“I must have fallen asleep here. How are you feeling?”

“Better, thanks” you lay on your side, still smiling. Wanda is still thinking about the way you called her and it’s fairly obvious you don’t remember.

Still, she leans forward and you almost watch in slow motion as her lips meet yours in a short kiss.

“Why did you…”

“You make me feel… I don’t know. Safe. I’m sorry, if I crossed line. Maybe I should go…” she sits up and you follow suit, making her turn to you.

This second kiss is a bit more urgent and less delicate, but you hope it makes a point.

“Now I really hope that what I had wasn’t contagious”

Wanda laughs at that, her hand over yours.

——

The next few weeks you grow closer to Wanda. You spend most of the time at her place, watching sitcoms and more often than not, you end up making out on her bed, until you’re both out of breath.

She also enjoys teasing you endlessly, like that time she sat next to you in Agatha’s class and put her hand on your thigh. Your knee jolted forward, crashing against the table and making the professor glare at you.

This time, you’re supposed to be studying in your room, but you find that looking at Wanda as she goes over her notes is far more interesting.

“Stop” she says after a few minutes and you smile.

“I’m not doing anything”

“You’re staring”

“Can you blame me?” you crawl behind her, placing small kisses down her neck. She sighs at the contact, leaning against your front.

“Are you doing this to get my notes?”

“Maybe” you laugh against her shoulder, making her turn until you’re kissing her, and she pushes you down on the bed, straddling your lap.

“You better work for them, then”

Next day, when you’re done with your test, the first thing you do is reach for Wanda’s hand. To your surprise, she flinches away, grabbing the strap of her bagpack.

“Did you do ok on the test?” she’s quick to ask, hoping you won’t push it too much.

“I think so, yeah”

“If you pass, I’d say you owe me for borrowing my notes” she smiles.

“Well, we could go out to the movies. Or dinner?” you suggest, your heart beating faster. It’s a thought that has been going through your mind recently.

Not that you don’t enjoy the kissing and sneaking around, but you’re eager to take Wanda out, find new places together, talk about something else other than classes and her old shows.

“I’m not sure I can make it” Wanda says, avoiding your eyes again.

This new rejection stings and you drop your shoulders, looking for an excuse to leave.

“Yeah, you’re right. We have lots of stuff to do. I’ll catch you later” you say, walking faster and not waiting for Wanda’s reply.

The rest of the day is spent in your dorm, which isn’t unusual. The only difference is that you’re alone instead of enjoying Wanda’s company, and hiding from seeing her.

“Wanna go to Joe’s with us?” Carol offers. “To celebrate midterms are over”

“Sounds fun” you agree, because it’s been forever since you’ve been with your friends.

“You can invite your girl”

“She’s not my girl”

“Oh?” Carol tilts her head to the side, putting the pieces together. “So that’s why you only hang out in the dorms”

“What did you think we were doing?”

“Having sex like crazy”

No answer comes to you, because sex is something that hasn’t happened yet. Or maybe never, considering Wanda doesn’t want anything more.

“I don’t think she knows what she wants, Carol”

“Do you?” she asks gently. Your immediate response is a shrug of your shoulders, and it’s a lie, because you know exactly what you want. “Come on, it’s her loss then. Let’s just go out and have fun”

Meeting your friends does improve your mood and you’re happy you listened to Carol. You eat and play pool, until everyone gets restless and looks for something else to do.

“Heard Stark is having a party” Carol says, knowing he always gets the fancy booze.

“Pass” you’re the first one to speak.

“Why?”

“Isn’t he best friends with Jarvis?” Darcy says. “We don’t want to have another fight, do we?”

“Oh come on, there will be so many people he won’t even notice that you’re there!” Carol insists, and you can tell she’s gonna be stubborn and annoying until she gets what she wants.

So, you agree, but spend the whole time looking around, waiting for that jerk to pop out of nowhere and pick up a fight.

“I don’t think he’s here” Darcy says, patting your back. “Let’s just have some fun, then Val will drag Carol out of here and we can go home, yeah?”

“Sounds like a plan” you nod.

For the next hour, you do enjoy the party and are even surprised when Tony seems happy to see you. To be fair, he is a lot nicer than most of his friends. You’re relaxed, dancing to the music and doing shots with Darcy and Val, almost forgetting why you were so sad in the first place.

That is, until you walk out of the living room to get another beer, but the place is so crowded you bump into a girl.

“Sorry, are you ok?” you say, turning to make sure she’s fine.

Your stomach drops when your eyes meet Wanda’s.

She calls for you, but the sound of her voice is drowned out by the music and the ringing in your ears. Jarvis says Wanda’s name, and you take advantage of the distraction to escape, pushing people out of the way.

When the fresh air hits you, the first thing you do is bend over the railing of the porch and throw up, coughing and wretching violently.

“It’s ok” Darcy comes out of nowhere, getting the hair out of your face.

“Shit” Val sobers up immediately. “Time to go home?”

“Yeah, come on. Let’s get a cab” Carol says, patting your back.

They think you’re wasted, but all you are is heartbroken. Wanda was with him, after everything you’ve been through.

The shame over being so naive makes you stay in your dorm for the entire day.

Wanda shows up the minute Carol leaves.

“You should go”

“Please let me explain”

“I don’t think that’s possible” you shake your head. You know it, deep down. She’ll never give you a place in her life.

“We’re just… friends. He wanted to talk, apologize”

“Wanda” you plead, hoping she’ll stop. But instead, she pushes past you, her hands in your face.

“I can’t lose you”

“Why would I stay?”

Wanda answers with a kiss, that is slow at first, and then borderline agressive. You’re pushing, then pulling, unsure of what you want from her, but she pulls your pants down, just enough for her hand to fit, moving past your underwear and circling your clit. Your nails dig into her shoulders, gasping and breathing as she enters roughly, her fingers moving fast and hard.

It’s not nice or affectionate, but a way to further claim you, ruin you, brand you. Now she’s reached and touched more of you, and you’ll never be able to erase it.

Your orgasm comes unexpectedly, and after the high, you come crashing down. All you feel is bitterness and guilt and anger. Wanda stays inside, biting your neck. The sting reminds you, you’re only gonna get pain out of this.

—

It becomes a vicious circle. Wanda is distant in public, because more often than not Jarvis is by her side. And then, she corners you in any spot she can find, kissing you and pressing her body against yours.

The more you let her in, the weaker you are and it’s nearly impossible to stay away. It will hurt if she leaves, and it hurts to be with her.

“I don’t know how to stay away” you confess to Carol one particularly hard night. Darcy was called to offer her support, and she provided that along with snacks. “You were right, Darcy”

“I didn’t want to be” she says, holding your hand. “You’re the only one who can put a stop to this. She’ll never stop looking for you”

You can’t see yourself doing that, but then you walk past her in the hallway, and you hear her saying those words to Jarvis.

“I love you”

You couldn’t even get her to hold your fucking hand.

Pushing past her, you walk away, hoping to find the nearest bathroom and lock yourself there. Lucky for you, Wanda doesn’t follow you.

There’s someone else waiting outside.

“Miss Y/L/N” Professor Harkness greets and you nod, looking at your feet and hoping she doesn’t notice your red eyes.

“Professor”

“You’re too advanced for my class. My wife has a spot in her lecture. New people to impress, most of them pHD students”

Her emphasis in the new makes you understand.

You won’t have to see Wanda in class.

“Ok. I’d like that”

“Keep your head high, kiddo” Agatha says, her hand on your chin. “And don’t tell any of this to Rio or she’ll accuse me of going soft”

“Yes, Professor Harkness. Thank you”

“Mhm” she nods, giving her signature smirk and turning around.

One less place where you’ll have to see Wanda.

Soon after that, you change everything about your routine. Where you eat, study, even go out for runs. Hell, you change your phone number and Darcy is kind enough to let you stay with her for a while. That, and the Thanksgiving break are enough to give you three weeks of space.

It hurts and more than once you have to stop yourself from looking for Wanda. But what’s the point of being a secret? The longer it goes on, the more it will hurt.

Still, there are days when anger weights heavier than sadness. You’re mad at yourself, for being so stupid. At Wanda, because she was a coward and a liar. And those times, you get restless and go out to run, listening to music until you reach a hidden lake. It’s one of the few places you can be at peace, because you found it after Wanda broke your heart. So, there’s no ghost of her here, only you and your conflicting emotions.

Throwing stones at the lake is a way to pass time, and you’re doing exactly that when you hear rustling behind you.

“Sorry” a raspy voice says. Your eyes meet green ones, but these are softer, almost shy. The girl has beautiful red hair, braided with a few strands lose. She misinterprets your silence, and quickly retreats. “I’ll find another spot”

“That’s ok. I can… I can go”

“No, you don’t have to” she’s quick to reassure.

“Well, we can always share” you propose, smiling. The girl nods, and places her bagpack next to a log. She pulls out a book, and begins reading. You continue throwing rocks, stealing glances here and there.

“Is the book any good?” you finally ask.

“Depends”

“On what?”

“On your fascination with social expectations in Russian society during the 19th century”

“Pass. Got anything lighter?” you joke. To your surprise, the girl pulls out another book.

“How about the perils of indulging in romantic fantasies?”

“I know those very well” you say, grimacing. She puts the book down, smiling at you. You try to smile back, but turn your attention back to the lake until you’re able to calm down.

“Lit major?” you guess, pointing at the spot next to her. She moves her bag, allowing you to sit.

“Yeah. You?”

“Anthropology. Minor in Art History. I’m surprised we haven’t seen each other in the building”

“I'm a grad student, so I’m usually at the library” the girl says.

“No parties?”

“No one ever invites me” she shakes her head.

“I’d invite you” you blurt out, finding her blush adorable. “Sorry, I don’t mean to be forward”

“It’s not… you’re fine”

“So. Anna Karenina and Madame Bovary. Are you trying to find out if Tolstoy really wrote his book with Flaubert’s in mind?”

The girl gives you an appreciative smile, nodding.

“Yeah, but it’s more about how men in 19th century wrote about women. Even in two different societies, the protagonists are punished for following their desires”

“No one should be punished for that” you say, looking at her. She averts her eyes, holding back a smile.

“Why Anthropology?” she changes the subject.

“Because. We’re the same and we’re not, even thousand of years apart. Isn’t that fascinating?”

“How so?”

“Do you think you have anything in common with someone who lived thirty thousand years ago?”

“We need food to survive. Sleep, water, oxygen” she lists, and you nod.

“Mhm. All basic needs. Next question, did you make a drawing of your hand when you were a kid?”

“Everyone did” she says, as if it’s obvious.

“Why?”

“Because I wanted to see what it looked like. Because it was my hand and no one else’s”

“And people thirty thousand years ago thought the same thing. And left their handprint in a cave in Southern France. Isn’t that something wonderful?”

She stays silent for a second and then smiles.

“I suppose it is, yes. To have an impact, so long after you’re gone too”

“You get it” you nod. “I’m Y/N, by the way”

“Natasha” she says, smiling at you.

The next few days, you catch yourself thinking about Natasha, and even with all the distractions, your mind goes back to her. It takes every ounce of self control to not wait everyday by the lake. Why would you want to get hurt, when you just started healing?

Love never ends well for Anna Karenina, Emma Bovary or yourself.

And yet… three days later you’re by the lake, holding a book of your own collection and an extra scone. You’re about to give up when Natasha shows up, and she seems as eager as you.

“Hey”

“Hi” she answers, a smile on her face. “Am I interrupting lunch?”

“This is for you. I mean, I was hoping I’d see you here” you stutter, looking everywhere but Natasha’s eyes.

“I was hoping to see you too” she confesses. It takes you by surprise, so she grabs the scone and the book as you try to gather your thoughts.

“Emily Dickinson” she reads. “Enjoying it?”

“You can borrow it if you want. I mean, yes I enjoyed it when I read it. But I just thought, you might like a change from male authors”

“Thank you” she nods, holding it close to her. “I actually have to go…”

“Oh, right” you nod, trying not to look disappointed.

“Can I have your number?” Natasha blurts out, her cheeks turning almost as red as her hair. “To give you your book back”

You smile, handing over your phone.

“I recently changed my number and I haven’t memorized it yet. So give me yours”

“Ok” she says. As soon as the device is back in your hands, you send her a text.

“See? Now I’m sure I gave you the right number”

“Talk to you soon. Thanks for the food”

When is it appropriate to text someone without looking desperate?

Either way, you can’t hold back your excitement as you walk to your dorm, jumping on Carol’s back as she’s eating her cereal.

“Are you mad?” she says, flakes and milk flying all over the counter.

“I’m just happy!”

“Why?” she glares, hoping you’re not back to your old ways.

“I spoke to a girl. And she gave me her phone number”

“Oh, my God! Y/N!” Carol shouts, the rest of her cereal thrown away as she dances around.

“What’s all the fuss?” Val says from the shower, concerned over the noise. Carol runs to the bathroom and opens the door wide.

“Y/N met a girl”

“Way to go!” Val joins the celebration and you’re about to say thank you when you notice she’s stepping out of the shower.

“Gah, bye”

“Yeah, we wouldn’t want your new girlfriend to think you’re a pervert!”

“Shut up” you say, walking to your room and flipping her off without turning back.

The rest of your evening is spent studying, but also looking at your phone waiting for anything to come through.

As you’re getting ready to sleep, there’s a text.

Nat: I’m ready to give the book back.

Y/N: It’s been… seven hours?

Nat: I’m a fast reader.

Nat: Secret spot? Saturday morning.

Y/N: I’ll be there

—

It’s the first time you’re there so early. The light filters through the leaves, birds chirping as their day begins with the rays of sunshine.

The walk to the lake is lovely, and you spot a couple of small flowers as you find your way to the place. Deciding to get one for luck, you twirl it around in your fingers.

You sit by the log, looking at the fog over the surface of the water when you hear soft footsteps approaching.

“I was afraid you’d stood me up” you joke when Natasha sits next to you.

“And stole your book?”

“The book, I could get over” you admit, giving her the flower. Natasha smiles, her fingertips caressing the petals delicately.

Your eyes are focused on the curve of her lips and those beaufitul eyes.

“Well, I’m here” she says, smiling when your eyes meet hers. “Thank you, I enjoyed reading it”

You take the book, your hands touching briefly.

“There’s a problem, though”

“What is it?” you say, worried that something’s wrong.

“I gave the book back, but I still have to thank you for that scone”

“Oh” you laugh.

“So, what is your preferred payment method? Ice cream? Coffee?”

“It’s a little early for ice cream”

“Then we’ll get it later. I know just the place”

“Yeah. I’d like that”

Though there are no classes, Natasha still has to meet with her advisor, so you chat for an hour until she has to go back to uni, agreeing to meet at your dorm in the evening.

“Is this a date?” you ask your friends on the video call as they agree on what you should wear.

“Of course it is, you silly goose!” Carol says, her face occupying half of the screen. “Wear something hot!”

“No, something comfortable. It’s an ice cream date, not a club” Val argues, trying to get a glimpse of the options.

“Something comfortable AND hot”

As they keep arguing, you opt for a pair of jeans, a white cotton t-shirt and a light jacket.

“Gotta go” you say when someone knocks. After hanging up, you are surprised to check Natasha’s ten minutes early. Plus, you don’t remember giving her your exact room number, agreeing you’d come down and meet at the lobby.

You’re about to open the door when the voice on the other side makes you stop in your tracks.

“Y/N? Please. Open up. I need you”

Wanda.

That voice, those words, the feelings you’ve been trying so hard to push away and bury come back. But instead of hurting you, they make you angry. You’re about to go out with a wonderful girl, who seems geniuenly interested in you. And here comes Wanda, trying to stain that as well.

Without thinking twice, you climb out of the window, holding on to the emergency ladder. You look down, unsure of what to do when you reach the last step.

"What are you doing?" Natasha says, rushing to stand above you.

"Parkour?" you reply weakly. "Is it too high?"

"Don't worry, I'll catch you"

Trusting her, you jump. Truth to her word, she eases the fall as you land, but you drag her along with you as you stay on the floor.

“Are you hurt? Why did you do that?”

Her hands are running over every inch of your face, going down to your shoulders and arms. The worry in her eyes only makes your heart beat faster.

“My roomate accidentally locked me inside”

You figure it's better than saying "My situationship is outside my door and I wanted to avoid her"

“You could have told me, and I would have gone and find her” Natasha insists.

“You’re right, I’m sorry. Let’s get ice cream? I won’t ever do this again” you promise, holding her hand. The redhead rolls her eyes, but nods and leads you away from the building.

You make small talk, appreciating how her hand doesn’t leave yours as you get away from campus and to the walking district. You try to look discreetly behind you, hoping Wanda didn’t see you and followed you.

Natasha finds the store, opening the door for you.

“Rocky road, please” you give Natasha puppy eyes and she smiles, ordering strawberry ice cream for her.

“So, what’s your deal?” she asks as you leave the store.

“My deal? What do you mean?” you say, mouth full of ice cream. The girl wipes the corner of your mouth with her napkin.

“You mentioned parties. Are you some sort of wild girl looking for someone to charm every night?”

“Oh, yes, I’m quite the Casanova” you laugh. “No, come on. My friends are cool and we just like to have fun from time to time”

“So, not a player” she notes with a smile.

“I did get my heart broken, though”

“Fella done you wrong?”

“His girlfriend done me wrong” you correct, wishing you were talking about anything else. But truthfully, if you want things to work out, you better be honest. “She was with me, but only on her terms and as if I were a secret”

“I’m sorry, you don’t deserve that”

“I moved on. So, don’t think I’m just messing here, Nat. I really like you” you hurry to say, blushing slightly.

“I like you too” she takes your hand. “Now, let’s finish our ice cream so I can show you this awesome bookstore I found”

The next few hours are spent talking about college, some of your plans for the future and also, your friends. You smile when Natasha comments she’d love to hang out with them.

Before it gets dark, you walk back to campus. Worried that Wanda might still be at your door, you asked Darcy a while back to go check. Apparently, the coast was clear.

Natasha walks you to the door.

“I had the best time” you say, smiling. “We should do it again. Maybe go to the movies?”

“Would love to” Natasha nods, her eyes drifting to your lips. You lean forward, heart beating fast as you’re eager to feel her lips on yours.

“Are you still here? I told you to beat it!” Darcy opens the door, making you both jump back. “Oops, I thought you were someone else. Sorry, I’ll go back inside. Pretend this didn’t happen, make out”

“Darcy” you groan. Your friend doesn’t get inside, though.

“The famous Natasha. Y/N here won’t shut up about you”

“Shhh, don’t listen to her, she’s off her meds” you ask Nat, covering Darcy’s mouth and pushing her inside. As you close the door, you hold it so she can’t open it again.

Natasha laughs, her hands going to your hips and pulling you softly. You take a few steps forward, smiling as she lifts your chin, leaning to connect your lips in a slow kiss.

It’s mindblowingly good, although too short for your liking.

“So, when are we doing this again?”

“The date or the kiss?” she jokes and your hands go around her neck.

“Both”

“As soon as you’re free” she says, kissing you once more before leaving for the day.

Darcy snaps a picture the second you walk inside.

“That’s the gayest you’ve ever looked, congrats” she says, sending the picture to the group chat.

You roll your eyes, pulling out your phone and smiling.

Y/N: Best I’ve ever had

Nat: The kiss or the ice cream?

Y/N: What do you think?

Smiling at your phone, you walk to the couch where your friend is sitting.

“I’m happy that you’re happy” she says, relieved that you’re healing from everything that Wanda put you through.

“Me too” you sigh, pulling your knees against your chest. “Though I do have to ask. Did Wanda say why was she here?”

“I didn’t care enough to find out. All I did was tell her to leave you alone. And then I pretended you were inside so she wouldn’t go anywhere else looking for you”

“You’re a great friend” you nudge her with your foot and she glares.

“Ew, get that thing away from me”

“I take it back” you show her your tongue.

The next week, you text Natasha between classes, and though she’s very busy, she’s always making time to get back to you. You agree to go out on another date on Friday, but neither one can wait to see each other, so you end up at the library on a Wednesday evening, each one focused on your work.

Well, Natasha is focused on her work. You’re looking at her, because this is the first time you’ve seen her wearing glasses and it’s adorable.

“Find anything interesting?”

“Plenty” you say, not even pretending to be reading your notes.

“You’re not the only one who’s staring” Natasha’s eyebrow arches, speaking without looking up. “Brunette, green eyes, a lot of rings and eyeshadow”

“Oh”

“Is that the infamous ex?” she says and you’re scared she’ll be upset about this whole situation.

“Uhm… yeah. I’m sorry. If she’s making you uncomfortable, I’ll just leave…”

Natasha looks up at that, eyeing you up and down as you struggle to read her expression. She surprises you by pulling your chair until it bumps against hers, leaning forward and kissing you, one of her hands on your thigh and the other holding your chin, in that signature move that always makes your head spin.

“Maybe that’ll keep her away” Natasha says, smiling and bumping her nose against yours.

“You can’t just kiss me like that and expect me to focus on an essay” you say, biting your lip.

“Then let’s get something to eat. We need a break from all this studying” she proposes, picking up her things and leading you out of the library, her hand in yours.

You don’t care to look around for Wanda to check if she’s watching, because this moment with Natasha is yours. She’s holding your hand, kissing you, spending time with you whenever she can, instead of hiding you like you’re a dirty secret.

By being herself, she’s given you the one thing you always craved for. Something real.

Finally, Friday comes and you’re buzzing with excitement, getting ready to meet Natasha.

“Wanna go to a party tomorrow? You can invite your girlfriend” Val says, painting her nails while Carol throws a ball in the air.

“We haven’t had the talk about being each other girlfriends”

“What? And you call yourself a lesbian? This is the second date, you should be adopting a cat by now”

“Like you and Val with Goose?”

“Yes!”

“Well, sorry to disappoint the sapphics, I’m just trying to not scare her away. And about the party, yeah, if Natasha’s up for it, we’ll stop by”

“Alright, it’s at Stark’s”

“Oh. Maybe not, then”

Your friends share a look, and you glare as they both stay silent.

“You can’t avoid her forever” Val is the first one to speak. “She’s gonna keep looking for you, getting in the middle of what could be a good relationship just because she thinks she can”

“Yeah, next time you see her, don’t jump out the window. Open the door and tell her off” Carol agrees.

“You did what?” Val looks at you, baffled.

“It’s ok, Nat was there to catch me. Speaking of which” you hear a knock on the door, and stand up. “See ya, cat ladies”

“Hey! We only have the one”

You laugh as you open the door, but then you’re interrupted by Natasha’s lips on yours.

“Hey”

“Hello” she smiles, and then looks behind you as your friends whistle.

“Meet Val and Carol. My two former best friends” you grumble when they make kissing sounds.

“Nice to meet you” Natasha greets over your shoulder.

“Bring her home at a decent time” Carol says. “Unless you plan on having sex. In that case take her back to yours so she doesn’t wake me up”

“I hate you so much” you sigh, pulling Nat away.

“We’ll see you at the party tomorrow”

“Sorry about them” you mumble when you’re going down the stairs.

“What was that about a party?” she asks, opening the car door for you.

“Ever heard of Tony Stark? Big house, bigger ego. Loves to have parties. We don’t have to go unless you want to” you say, half expecting her to turn down the invitation.

“If you want me to go I’ll be there”

“I just want us to spend some time together, doing whatever you want” you say, blushing.

“I did promise I’d try going to a party with you, and it seems like the perfect time. Could meet the rest of your friends”

“Alright then” you nod, excited and terrified about how things could turn out if a certain someone is there.

Carol is right, though. You can’t be looking over your shoulder all the time, expecting Wanda to approach you and open those wounds.

If you have closure, in whatever way that is, she won’t have the power to hurt you anymore.

It’s hard to focus on the movie with Natasha by your side, her hand clasped in yours over your leg. At one point, you lean against her shoulder and she kisses your temple.

She’s so perfect, it makes you dizzy.

“What did you think about the movie?” she asks as you go out of the theater, her arm around your waist.

“It was good. I’m glad I understood most of it without having watched those other Alien movies”

“Why didn’t you tell me? I would have picked a different one” she protests, pulling you to a stop.

“I just want to be with you. Plus you looked so excited to watch it, I had a hard time saying no”

“Is that so?” she arches an eyebrow.

“Don’t use that against me, Natasha” you warn, getting ready to argue but her lips silence you, and you moan against the kiss.

It’s not nearly enough, and you need more of her, not just kissing.

“So if I ask you to go back home with me, will you still have a hard time saying no?”

“On the second date? What do you think I am, a harlot?”

“I’d count the lake as a date of it’s own. And the library too”

“So, this is like the fourth one?” you say, counting with your fingers.

“You don’t have to, I was only…”

Natasha’s words are cut off by your lips on hers, and she holds back a moan of her own when you run your tongue over her bottom lip.

“I’d very much like to go back to your place”

The drive back is silent, but not in an uncomfortable way. There’s a certain tension, and the expectation of what is about to happen makes you feel like your heart is beating out of your chest.

“This is home” Natasha says, opening the door to her apartment. Of course, as a grad student, you expected her to have her own place, but you still admire how homey it feels. There are books everywhere, which makes sense, and pictures of Natasha’s family.

“It’s lovely” you say, turning back to look at her. The tour of the place is forgotten, as you watch Natasha approach you slowly, her hands dropping to your waist.

“Nervous?”

“Yeah. A bit” you admit, because lying to Natasha has never been something you’d consider doing. “I want this to be perfect. And for you to really like it”

For me to be enough.

“It’s already perfect” she says, coming closer and kissing you slowly. Your eyes close as you enjoy the sensation of her lips against yours, hands wandering to your lower back. Without breaking the kiss, you discard your jacket and take hers off as well, and she immediately pulls you against her, your hands holding her cheeks as she deepens the kiss.

“Are we doing it standing up?” you ask when she breaks apart, breathing heavily against your neck. “Because I’ve never tried it, but I am open to experimenting”

“You could just say that we should take this to the bedroom” she laughs against your temple.

“Now, where’s the fun in that?”

Still, she laughs as you pull her by the belt loop of her pants, guessing that her bedroom must be that last door to the left.

“Bingo” you smile, opening the door. There are more books scattered on the nightstand and the floor, but at least the bed is clear. “God, Nat, your reading is gonna kill me” you say as you fall to the bed and make her land on top of you.

“Sorry, I don’t have company very often”

“Are you a virgin?” you tease, knowing full well she’s dated in the past, though nothing serious.

Instead of answering, she kisses you again, her lips drifting down to your neck, and then lower to your stomach. In one swift motion, she unsclaps your bra and lifts your shirt up, her tongue swirling around a nipple. You moan, surprised at the contact, holding her head in place as she moves to the other nipple.

“Does it look like my first time?” Natasha says against your lips, her hands going down to undo the button of your jeans.

“I’m sorry, I was only joking, baby” you say, and it’s almost embarassing how desperate you sound.

“Good girl” she comments, pulling your pants down. You struggle with your underwear and Natasha’s too impatient, so she pulls it aside and starts eating you out, her tongue making circles and swirling around your clit.

“Fuck, fuck, fuck” you say, biting your hand to keep you from screaming. Natasha nudges your clit with her nose as she moves to go up and down and you’re close when she stops. “Why?”

“I want to be inside you”

It’s a mystery, how your brain doesn’t stop functioning at that, but you manage to discard your shirt and start to undress Natasha, eager to feel her skin against yours. Once you’re both naked, she flips you, so you’re on top of her, straddling her lap.

“I’m debating if it would be better to have my fingers or my strap buried in your pussy” she says, and you wonder how the girl who is so well spoken can manage to be so crass.

Not that you’re complaining.

“Anything you want” you say, aware that you’re rubbing your center against her thigh.

“What’s that?”

“I… please. Just use me” you plead, desperate for some release.

Those words do it for Natasha, who takes out a strap on from her nightstand. You protest when she stands up to fasten it around her hips, feeling like you’re gonna combust if she’s not touching you.

“Shh, I’m here” she soothes you, laying on top of you and rubbing the strap against your entrance.

“Fuck me, Nat” you squeeze your legs around her, hoping she stops teasing you.

“That’s the plan, baby. Tell me if it hurts?” Natasha asks as she begins to fill you up, and you’re too far gone to give a verbal confirmation, nodding instead.

“More” you insist when she stops, searching for any sign of discomfort. Natasha thrusts forward, sinking the entire shaft and you moan, arching your back. “Harder”

Truthfully, Natasha’s never been so adventurous or forward in her sex life, but the way you’re pleading, clenching and panting underneath her, wakes something entirely new inside her. Pushing your knees against your chest, she moves in and out, reaching new spots that make you see stars.

“Yes, yes, yes” is all you manage to say, holding on to the sheets as your knuckles turn white. “Nat, I’m gonna…”

The words are stuck in your mouth as a powerful orgasm takes over, leaving you breathless. You feel Natasha slowing down her movements, and then she goes to kiss your neck, the strap still buried inside you.

“That was…” you sigh, trying to make your brain work. As your breathing steadies, your muscles relax and you let a finger run up and down Natasha’s side. “I don’t know what to say. You’re the one with the big words”

“That was fucking hot” she says, making you laugh. “And I’m not done with you”

Good thing your schedule was clear for the next day, because you weren’t getting any sleep tonight.

—

Your muscles feel sore when you wake up, stretching and turning in Natasha’s arms, watching her sleep.

Her alarm woke you up, but she’s still sound asleep.

“Nat” you say, moving her fiery hair out of her face. “Baby”

“No” she protests.

“Time to get up. You’re meeting your advisor, remember?”

Natasha curses under her breath, clearly not caring enough to wake up.

“Hey… what if I sit on your face?”

“I’m up” she says, opening her eyes and pulling you by the waist. “Come on, giddy up”

“Nuh-uh. Get dressed”

“Why would you lie about something like that?” she whines, burying her face in your neck.

“I didn’t lie, because technically, I didn’t say I’d do it right now. Get dressed, I’ll make breakfast and then we can go back to uni”

“Fine. But this discussion is not over” she kisses your cheeks, neck and then your lips, smiling as you laugh. “Morning”

“Morning, baby” you say, appreciating how beautiful she looks even with bed hair.

When she gets up, you find one of her t-shirts and go to the kitchen, looking at your options. You opt for french toast and make some coffee, because Natasha is definitely gonna need it to stay awake.

“Tastes amazing” she comments when you sit down to eat.

“Breakfast or me?” you tease and she almost chokes with her coffee. “Sorry, let’s eat”

“So, what are the plans for today?”

“Laundry, some homework. Standard stuff”

“Do you have any plans for lunch?” Natasha asks and you shake your head no. “Would you like to eat with me? After I’m done with my meeting and you finish your stuff, of course”

“Would love to” you say, smiling at how domestic and perfect it all feels.

Once you finish breakfast, you get changed and walk to Nat’s car. Parking close to your dorm, she kisses you goodbye and walks to the professor's offices.

You’re so distracted, thinking about everything that happened that you don’t notice Wanda sitting outside your dorm until you’re at the door.

“Wanda” you say, your hands in the pocket of your jeans. “Hey”

“Y/N? Did you just get here?” she says, looking around and then at the time on her phone. “You didn’t sleep here?”

“What do you want?”

“I want… to apologize”

You sigh, hoping the conversation ends soon so you don’t have to ever talk to her again.

“Anything else?”

“I thought he would change. He promised. But then it happened, again and again. And all I could think about is how you’d never do that to me”

“No, I wouldn’t. But now it’s too late. You made your choice”

“It was the wrong choice. Please, just give me another chance. I was scared before…”

“No, Wanda. I’m sorry, but I don’t want to hear it and we’re not gonna be anything at all. Natasha is… she’s amazing and I want to be with her. You had a choice to make and you went with him. And now… I have to choose the girl I’m in love with”

“Is there anything I can do or say…?”

“No. I’m sorry” you shake your head. Wanda nods, wiping away the tears. It does tug at your heart, seeing her so alone and broken. But it’s not on you to fix this.

Not anymore.

You let out a sigh when she leaves the hallway, turning in the other direction so she doesn’t see you wiping away a tear of your own.

Your eyes meet Natasha’s. She’s holding a bouquet, looking at you intensely.

“Nat. I can explain.”

The redhead drops the flowers and you’re scared she’ll walk away, but instead, she approaches you, lifting you as she kisses you. You sigh against her lips, holding on to her as if she’s the only thing in the world.

“I heard. Everything. You don’t have to explain anything” she puts you down, smiling. “I’m in love with you too”

“I don’t… know what to say” you laugh, craddling her face in your hands.

“No need to speak” she pulls you closer again, walking back until your're cornered against your door.

“I swear to God, if it’s that girl again I’m going to…” Carol opens the door without a warning, making you almost fall. “Awww, you guys! Val, come look! They’re kissing”

“With tongue?”

“I hate you so much” you complain, hiding your face in Natasha’s neck. She laughs, kissing your temple. “Now close the door so I can say goodbye to my girlfriend”

“Girlfriend? Val, they’re girlfriends!”

“Wohoo!” the girl screams from somewhere inside the apartment.

“Agh, it’s like having overbearing lesbian mothers” you slam the door shut, turning to Natasha. “I’m staying at your place tonight, or they will drive me insane with all their questions”

“Tonight, every night. Whatever you want. Just know… you’re getting very little sleep” she says with a smirk, kissing you.

“I can live with that”

[oimitocat]

MIND ME | HC

txt ot5 (separately) x gn!reader

reacting to reader with dark/trauma humor + implied past suicidal tendencies + implied past trauma + coping with humor + therapy sessions + idol au! + implied eating disorders

a/n: literally fair warning, if you can’t handle it, move on. this is fiction but with real life tendencies.

—HUENING KAI

one day you had to do your therapy session over the phone due to your busy schedule. kai had come in to sit with you as your session was close to an end. the basic “see you next time, call me if you need to chat or have questions” thing goes on and then you hang up.

he’s comfortable in your bed, you crawl in to cuddle with him.

“anything new?” he asks, he’s always so caring, so tender.

“nah.” then you pause, smiling.

“what is it?” he asks, “why are you smiling?”

you shake your head, “just remembered this joke i made to my therapist.”

“a joke?” he asks, curious.

you watch him, smiling at the mess of his hair. “so like, i use to self harm-“ his eyes widen a bit, yet he quickly fixes his expression, “-and so she asked if i still do it and i joked and said ‘no i have alcohol now’…” you sigh, “she didn’t laugh.”

and you bust out laughing when kai purses his lips, unsure if he should cry or find it funny either.

“y/n!”

“kai! i don’t drink! be for real!” you cackle as your cuddle him, easing his worries.

—CHOI BEOMGYU

“y/n, do you want to stay with me and keep practicing?”

“what? you’re saying i suck and need to keep practicing?”

beomgyu gasps, “no! what? i just- well the step we keep messing up! we should practice it!”

“so you’re saying i’m bad at it and you’re covering it by saying we both do? great, another thing i’m bad at.”

“what’s the other thing you’re supposedly bad at!” he argues, smiling at you.

“oh it’s a long list,” you say with a grin.

“as if.”

“no for real,” you pick up your water bottle, back facing his, “killing myself is number one. apparently i’m bad at it.” you shake your head before pausing.

“what?”

“i’m joking,” you say quickly, seeing the worry in his eyes. “beomgyu.”

“ah…” he just watches you, messing with his water bottle. “am i allowed to laugh when you joke like that?”

“if you want, i don’t care. would be preferable.” you pat his back, “let’s practice yeah?”

—KANG TAEHYUN

you were watching people getting their bones popped. it’s crazy what areas can be popped to soothe the body. yet you and taehyun were cringing and laughing.

“oh- ah!” taehyun flinches, watching how they popped someone’s neck.

“dude maybe i should go get my neck snapped.”

“don’t you mean popped?” he asks, smiling at your silliness.

you shake your head, “no. i mean snapped.”

taehyun rolls his eyes, “you wanna die or something?”

“always have.” and you get a smack on the arm, to which you laugh at. he knows your joking, and that makes you feel warm.

—CHOI SOOBIN

literally you love food. sadly the industry makes you develop a decently bad relationship with it sometimes. so, one day you’re eating sweet bread and go- “shit, i’m supposed to be on a diet for our comeback.”

“huh? why?” soobin frowns. “wait, really?”

“it’s okay, i’ll just starve until then, it’ll be like this never happened.”

“y/n, what?”

you glance at him while chewing, “what?”

“why the hell would you starve?” he eyes you, “wait, what does your diet consist of then?”

“coffee and antidepressants.” you joke.

“funny.”

“i know.”

—CHOI YEONJUN

it’s a task. literally, all of you are on a reality show and you have to fill out a questionnaire or something. you’re thinking on this question.

“what’s wrong?” yeonjun asks you while beomgyu and soobin make ruckus about what their answers are.

“i’m not sure what to put.”

“y/n, it’s basic questions.”

“that’s what my therapist said and then i was diagnosed a bunch of stuff.”

“the question is literally what’s your favorite childhood memory?”

“so about that, i don’t remember cus apparently — fun fact, when you experience some sort of trauma as a kid your mind blocks any memory during that age and time. i don’t remember shit,” you whisper. “what am i supposed to put? that my mom beat me with a spoon until i finished my homework?”

he stares at you, unsure what to do with that bomb drop. he knows you cope with humor, hence, “steal one of mine then.”

“bet.”

[tubbytarchia]

Wild Life Session 4 smallidarity thoughts (+ some Scar and Lizzie)

See it was all fine, nothing to worry about!! Joel couldn't bring himself to kill Jimmy, he barely even harmed him. I'm pretty sure he shot him just once (after Jimmy trampled their crops so. fair)? Joel calmed down, he rebuilt his car, everything is fine. He says at the start that he's wary of Jimmy because of him going after Joel last time, and that's about it for the time being

Jimmy dies and Joel makes a deal out of it and calls him a muppet. As per usual. Meanwhile Jimmy is still adamant to get at Joel whilst Scar tries to deter him because they want to be an alliance

He and Jimmy meet up at some point after their brief interaction at the start where Joel shot him, and they just banter. And Gem and Scar are just standing there like "guyss we're a family come on" meanwhile Joel and Jimmy's exchange goes as follows: Jimmy: "you're the ones with tasty lives!" Joel: "yeah bet you wish you could have a chunk of me!" "Oh I'm having a chunk out of you!" "Yeah and you know where to take that chunk out of!" "Oh I'm gonna take it! I'm taking it!" "You should!" And then Gem and Scar tell them to break it up and Joel goes "we're just flirting!!" ? what the fuck? Genuinely WHAT are they talking about. is this an innuendo of some sort. is this another ambiguous smallidarity sex scene sorry who said that

Jimmy gets a double kill (in the most adorable way btw. The way he weasels his way in there and backs off and comes back to try again all crouched. animal) and goddd people hyping him up is so so sweet. He deserves this. He's also a little bit evil, he's getting the murder rush but I'm happy for him. He needs to kill more people, he needs to get this out of his system, he deserves this, things need to get worse before they get better. ANYWAY Scar all "that was the greatest kill ever on the life series" is so cute. And man I gotta agree. There's more unique and funny and impressive kills but I would not mind calling this the best just for the fact that it's Jimmy. He's competent, he can do shit like this, but it feels like most everyone and the world is continuously against his survival, but here he is... my son...

And then Joel coming up to congratulate him... Really blummin cute. In Joel's POV also, he says "I went to congratulate Jimmy and we had a moment" which I wager he might be referring to the creeper incident as 'the moment' but that'd make no sense to call it that. With that tonation. Why did he say it like that. Stop being cute

But yeah Scar tries to blow Joel up with creepers only for Joel to save him from his own creeper and he's so casual about it. He is incredibly kind to the bamboozlers, it's really cute...

And then Jimmy does it!! He gets Joel!! And he gets him real good!! And can you believe that the first person to kill either of the family duo is Jimmy, of all people. Scott has died by this point too and Jimmy is the one to make a dent in the full 6-life alliance. Crazy. I'm so proud of him. It was seriously really good too, see, when Jimmy puts his mind to something and is able to focus he excels, he really does. And Joel, oh Joel is such a good sport about it. He keeps saying how it was good and fair and that he still wants an allyship with him. Tells him "welcome back to green" aww. And they make a truce, Jimmy got it out of his system and now they can be friends and go kill other people instead and Joel is proud of him... Jimmy "Joel, I finally got you, so I will stop now, so let's do the perfect dap" and then they both count down and clap their hands to simulate slapping palms. Awesome. All of Joel and Jimmy is just really cute this time around. Very happy about them being a more proper alliance now, but we'll see if it sticks... Joel can only be so mean to Jimmy at this point though I don't think he has it in him to betray him or anything lol. Can't speak for the rest of them but not too worried for the smallidarity, it's a plentiful crop...

Also a very important exchange between Lizzie and Jimmy at some point: "I just finangled a load of diamonds off of Joel" "Oh? How did you do that?" "I asked him just really nicely" (lie btw she was moreso extorting Joel) "Oh, that doesn't work when I... I guess... you are his wife, I guess..." "Yeah..." "Lucky for some I guess- right (unrelated topic)" I'm not 100% confident that's what Jimmy said at the end, it's a bit hard to make out but. what? Hello?

I also extend gratitude towards Lizzie for being so nice and supportive of Jimmy, she was the one to suggest the cobweb creeper trap that ended up taking Joel out, but she also insisted that he drink a health restoration stew beforehand in case anything went wrong. Jimmy didn't end up doing so (he was full) and Lizzie is all "why?" and "something could have gone wrong". man. Nice to him...

[gremlinmodetweeker]

Now imagine shifter!König, not shifted, and going through the lunches in the fridge. Finding his Finches, cause turns out the little bird is stupid good at cooking. And 'Finch' not 'Handler' now, storming into the enclosure squawking and shouting and accusatory fingers pointing.

"You big bloody bastard! Those are mine!" 'Finch' squawks out, unable to even try and reach those stupid exercise rings. They're a bitch to clean as it is up that high and asshole König likes to lounge on them now knowing it pisses off his Finch. Wait, his...? ....Yes, his. His Finch.

Okay so, before I keep going, can I steal the name Finch? I always like naming the readers for the stories and Finch is just so darn cute. I love it so much. Would I be able to use it going forward?

Now, onto the response:

Art from This Post

König is just a hungry man. As the largest shifter on KorTac's Eastern European base, he's well known as 'The Vacuum' for how he hoovers through food. He'll happily go through other people's lunches to get some extra snacks. Does he feel good about it? Somewhat. If KorTac wants to have such a giant shifter, they should be giving him more to eat. In a way, this is his form of silent protest. If KorTac won't feed him, he'll feed himself. It's only fair, he says to himself. You're a dick, everyone else says. I don't care, König decides.

Handlers and shifters alike know to be wary of König's efforts. Locks don't keep König out of lunches, but if you put your lunch at the very back of the fridge and not towards the front then usually you're free of König's snooping.

When you go to put your lunch in the fridge, you find it a bit hectic and messy. It's bizarre, seeing everyone's lunch pushed in the back. You can't help but wonder why everyone is piled up in the back of the fridge. The clamber to the back of the fridge has people piled up until they hit the top of the fridge, with another lunchbox or two shoved in to boot. It's a complete mess that's probably squishing their lunch into oblivion.

So, finding plenty of clear space at the front, you put your lunch tucked to the side and go about with your day.

All the others would say it was predictable, but the shock and horror upon finding your lunch raided had you chewing the culprit out to another handler near by.

"And whoever it was ate all the good parts, too!" you grumbled, "like, how? I just don't get it! It took me ages to make and this fucker comes along and eats all my hard work!"

The other handler, a foggy-eyed man who was closer to retirement than recruitment cleared his thick throat with a cough. You turned to face the old man with a scowl.

"Do you know anything about this Louis?" you snapped.

"Do I ever," the old Frenchman wheezed, "I bet you twenty balles that König was the one behind it."

That has you stalling for a minute. König? König ate you lunch? Oh you were going to kill that feather duster the next time you-

"He's so big but the big man doesn't give him any extra ration tickets," Louis explained, "I'd feel bad for him if he didn't eat my wife's cooking more than I do."

You drummed your fingers on the desk.

"Is there any reason he goes after the handler's fridges? He has the whole cafeteria at lunch.

Louis grinned, "He likes to snack. Don't you know?"

You grit your teeth. The stupid snacking bastard had another thing coming for him, just wait. You'd snap his little bird next when you got your hands on him.

You didn't actually manage to get around to König until after his training sessions for the day. Luckily for you, he had another session of training in his shifted form for you that day. You clenched your fists in preparation.

Of course, preparation means nothing if you never expected what was coming for you. So of course, you were completely bowled over by the sight of König unwrapping a little square of chocolate, the chocolate you'd saved for days, while sitting in a folding chair. He took one clean chomp before he perked up when he noticed you.

"Ah, Handler! What are we working on today?" he cheered, "do you have any good riddles today?"

Your eyes focused in on the little speck of chocolate at the corner of his lips.

"My chocolate..." you muttered quietly.

"What was that?"

"That's my chocolate, you feather-brained idiot!" you squawked, "you-YOU ATE MY LUNCH TODAY!"

König licked his lips, "Oh, you were the one who put your lunch in the front?"

"Fuck yeah I did!" you puffed up, "it took me ages to make it! I put so much time into that sandwich you wouldn't believe it! I was looking forward to it all week, but I had to age the-You know what nevermind. I don't care. I'm better than this. I'm better than all of this. I-"

You trailed off as König strode across the gymnasium floor to the rings, crouched down, then smoothly shifted into his monstrous form as he jumped up to go to the rings.

"GET DOWN FROM THERE!" you bellowed, "I WASN'T FINISHED WITH YOU YET!"

You heard a throaty cackle above. Your hair stood on end instinctively, but the fire inside only raged further.

"GET DOWN HERE!" you screeched like a little monkey.

Up above, König wove through the rings with masterful ease. Your whooping and howling wasn't of that much interest, but he took a moment to stop and hang by his tail from one of the rings. He cocked his head to look at you.

There, down on the ground you spluttered and spat, hopping up and down and waving your arms like a little bird.

Like a little finch, König thought to himself.

"Little Finch," König let out a hoarse laugh, "Little Finch, Little Finch!"

"Who-ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT ME!?"

"Little Finch Little Finch!" König tossed his head side to side as he sang out his little nickname for you.

"COME DOWN HERE RIGHT NOW! I'LL SHOW YOU A 'LITTLE FINCH'!"

Oh, König found this terribly amusing. He had a wonderful little game now.

[redwolfstabs]

hi billy!! saw your post so i gotta ask bc you asked me haha - team loomis hcs?? please? 🩶

OHHH ABSOLUTELY SWEET SWEET SAM

[Note: This post will be with Ghost!Billy and a version where Billy doesn’t die because they’re both delicious to me] [SPECIFICALLY for Parker, Parker will see the vision.]

Team Loomis hcs [survivor version] - for the Sam to my Billy 🩵

Billy has a lot of trust in Sam, as crazy as that is. An example of what I mean would be, let’s say, crazy shit starts happening because someone has figured out Billy really was the murderer in ‘96, he would be honest and open with Sam about it, because he’s worried for her safety, being so close to him. And he trusts her not to tell anyone [unless it’s Tara, which he deems is fair in this circumstance], and he especially trusts her NOT to tell the police.

At First, Billy wasn’t sure how to be a dad. He wasn’t even sure how to be a normal person. But, once he’s figured out what works for them, he’s feeling comfortable and safe being her dad.

Billy is a menace and does it to mess with Sam. Soft Example:

Billy:..what do you say we go bonding? Sam: that depends on your example of bonding. Billy:…I got a new knife, so- Sam:We’re not killing random people! Billy:OH OKAY. You hate me? You want me dead? In jail? You HATE ME?! Sam:..*sighs* you are so dramatic.

He can be a little too protective over Sam, because that’s his daughter and yeah, maybe he got a late start at it, but he wants it to be good. Sam gets a partner? Billy intimidates them, on purpose. His reasoning: he thinks it’s safer before she gets attached and gets hurt, because he doesn’t want her hurt. [If said partner stays even after his intimidation? Bonus points from Billy]

YOU SAID THIS BUT I WANNA REITERATE: they are nonstop bickering. That’s one of the main ways they communicate. Sam says something indirectly about Billy? Billy joins the conversation and it turns into the two of them going back n forth. Billy looks at Sam even slightly weird? Sam calls it out, they bicker. It’s usually playful and it’s fun and games, even if it bothers others around them

Sam has to convince Billy to try and be a dad to Tara as well. Billy initially didn’t want to, nothing against Tara, but he didn’t see a reason because she “wasn’t his the same way Sam was.” But what really helps convince him? Seeing the relationship Sam and Tara have, it makes him want to parent them both.

Sam can get Billy out of his head and vice versa. Assuming there’s no Stu here, Sam learns when Billy goes into his head and gets lost in a maze, and she learns ways to get him out of that maze. If Sam is ever stuck in her own head maze, Billy notices immediately, and helps get her out.

Even though they’re a lot alike and bicker, they never have any actual arguments. If they do, they take time and get some space, and when they come back together again they try and act normal when talking to each other.

Billy would genuinely kill for Sam if she asked.

Sam is prone to seeking validation from Billy, but won’t ask for it. She’ll do something and just go “hey- I did a thing, wanna see?” And of course billy wants to see, he wants to be apart of what she does, and every time he’s prone to letting her know she’s doing good / she’s so cool etc etc

When they FIRST started trying to be Father/Daughter, they both agree to seek therapy, and it did end up working. Now if they’re still in therapy, they sit by each other and treat it as a gossip session

They both constantly try to scare each other, and it gets worse during spooky season. Billy can’t be scared easily, Sam can’t either but it’s a little easier. The one time Billy did manage to scare her, he got a knee to the stomach and decided he would not be scaring her like that again because

Billy: Ow- Sam. Sam I’m in pain. Omg Sam. Sam that hurt. Why would you do that” Sam:..you fucking scared me?? What did you expect? I’ve almost died too many times for this shit. Billy: Ohhh you’ve almost died?? What about me?? I was stabbed and almost shot!” Sam: You sound like a five year old.” Billy: You look like a five year old.” Sam: Okaaaay old man—

Along with the head maze: Billy is very observant with Sam. Constantly watching her and making sure she's alright which helps him when too comes to noticing when she's sick / feeling down. He notices way before Tara, and if Sam finds this concerning that's just for her to know.

If Sam ever gets a pet, Billy is cautious around the pet. Especially any kind of dog. Sam will notice, and will slowly [and in a not too obvious way] get them to like each other.

They are both horrible when it comes to saying how they feel. Especially expressing any kind of words about love. So, Billy will randomly leave notes in areas he knows only Sam will find and see and they say various things like "I'm proud of you", "You're a good kid" etc- and Sam loves and appreciates them alot. In return, she buys him small little gifts like keychains or any nicknacks like that because she knows he'll love them.

Ghost!Billy version of Team Loomis hcs! 🩵

Every time Sam is in danger, Billy is there and watching. [yes, this is slightly canon but I wanna elaborate more.] it’s easier to see him in reflective surfaces, and if Sam gets the chance, he’ll be there guiding her. BUT, if that’s not the case: he talks to her. [example of this from something I’m writing rn for fun ⬇️]

“Saaam..” his voice comes out in a cold singsong way, and Sam shivers on instinct. ‘Kinda busy.. trying not to die here..’ She thinks, a ragged breath leaving her as she looks around, trying to map out her area. “You’re not gonna die..” everytime she hears him but can’t see him, it makes her nervous. Anxious. She always pictured him as something that wasn’t real. Something that her mind created. This? This is starting to disprove that, and it makes her nervous. “You are slacking though- Move. They’re coming down the stairs. You have.. what? A minute? Losing time the more you lay there.. cmooon Sam.”

Billy is prone to messing with Sam, even in this state. He’d constantly knock stuff off her desks, shelves- any flat surface with her stuff really. Imagine an invisible cat, that’s exactly what it is.

Anytime Billy isn’t around, Sam gets wildly concerned. In some ways, she’d be happy. Not having to hear or see him, dealing with his teasing and menace behaviours. But if he isn’t around for more than 32hrs she gets concerned, especially if she’s gotten used to him being around.

Sam constantly asks him his thoughts on things. And it could be about anything. If Sam meets someone new, she’d find ways to ask for Billy’s honest opinion.

This kinda goes with the one previously, but Billy also tells her when she’s near a dangerous person if Sam hasn’t realized it. Being around Ethan? Even if he’s friendly? Billy is there beside her, talking to her, telling her she needs to grab Tara and run. Billy has no proof to show Ethan is an issue, but Sam does feel obligated to listen, knowing Billy is probably correct.

Billy knows that Tara is mostly unaware of his existence, but that doesn’t stop him from trying to get Sam to talk about it. He approves of tara knowing he’s Sam’s dad, but he wants Tara to know more. To know that Billy is There. Sam doesn’t tell Tara for months about it, from being nervous in how Tara would react.

Sam HATES when Billy jump scares her through mirrors, says it’s irritating and annoying and makes him seem childish. Billy keeps doing it, because he is dramatic and playful.

This was very very fun to think of and write and just RAAAGHHHH thank you. I needed these out my HEAD

Let me know if you want more / your thoughts of these <33

[cherrytasticc]

Kengan Omega OC's reference!!!

Still working in the reference of all of my Kengan ocs, but for now i have the main (cofcof favorites cofcof) ones!!

More information of them below the cut!!!

Ajani —

He was part of the Kengan vs Purgatory tournament, same as Nicolás/Jean, he uses Jiu Jitsu, but as a side attack form. He usually goes for the punches

Along w it, he's a boxer, usually training with Jun because when he was growing up, Jun was the motive of why he become a fighter. He's a super star to him.

When Purgatory fighters could fight against Kengan ones after these two didn't become one, he and Sheila had a match: That's where he got the scar on his chest.

But they're friends!!! (Even if she kicked his ass and he returned the favor some weeks later. But they're gym friends.)

He's aside of being a DJ, is an excellent chef, he loves to be in the kitchen because is like his happy place. He loves fighting, but need a rest once in a while. Usually makes more to invite his friends, he doesnt like eating alone sometimes. That's what make him sad of being independent.

He got along (Purgatory) with: Nicolás, Liu, Naidan (BRO'S DEAD SADLY), Terashi, Rolón, Ryan (oc of @andy-kuramy ), José (Barely, he hate him just because don't think he's good enought for his bro Ryan, but don't make a huge deal out of it.)

And w the Kengan ones: Naoya, Himuro, Kaneda, Mokichi, Rei, Sen, Sheila, Saw Paing and Gaolang. (He don't talk a LOT with most of them, but he doesnt have problems with them, so, 👍)

He hates Akoya. Akoya is an asshole. (Totally not because he beat his ass)

Oc x Canon w Saw Paing (TWO RABIES DOGS FIGHTING FOR WHO LOVES THE OTHER MOST)

Sheila—

She make her debut in Kengan Ashura, being part of the aniquilation tournament with the company of her deceased mother who was a member of the Kengan Association.

Defeated in second round. (Everyone was surprised that she even passed the first one)

As years passed, she wanted to be more strong and grow her experience, so she went from country to country, training with some fighter, obviously paying them for taking their time if necessary (Muteba, Jun, Gaolang and Gensai). Her lost only give her a wish to become STRONGER. Never. Giving. Up.

She created her own style, she doesnt have a name for it, she just call it "Doing what she thinks she have to do." Is a combination of gymanstics, dance and box. She's pretty fast, mini sonic.

But She's more analytic that harmeful, she preffers winning fair and square, without killing anybody.

She has nails, wich since she was 12, prepare them to be a weapon, so the 10 nails of her hands are a venenous menace. She uses especials gloves to not hurt anybody outside the ring.

When Koga arrived to CJW and saw her training, she didn't think of her much of a menace. "I don't want to hurt her." He said, one day Jun put them to a sparring session after Sheila asked him to

"Hurt me?? Who you think you are?? Jun?" She asked, Jun in that moment just laughed, as when José, just give Koga a short explanation "She's Sheila. She comes here once in a while to train when shes on the country, she wanted to see of good where you." With that, Koga just nooded "Hm. Got it."

She, for experience of the time, ended winning, while seeing him, she sighed. "And with that you think you can be like Ohma in how long?? Six months? Yeah, you're totally screwed if your mind think a work of maybe decades can be done in just that."

She's a determinant, strategic and fair person, uses a lot of logic, her overthinking is sometimes her own weaknesses, she stays daydreaming sometimes.

She's not pretty used to the fancy life she has tooked in such a short period of time. Still being weird for her. But she loves her partner.

The three accesories with she holds her hair where given by him, actually.

She gets along with (Kengan): Yamashita, Ohma, Cosmo, Gaolang, Jun, Kaneda, Muteba, Naoya, Himuro, Adam, Sayaka, Karuo, Haruo, Rei, Sen, Lisellotte (Another oc of Andy, Lis is her sister), and Raian (Barely, just because he's her brother-in-law).

Oc x Canon w Rama XIII (Delulu)

[melancholysway]

I don't remember how bad Raph's anger issues were in the 2007 film so this might be a little ooc

But could you do something with Raph and Leo are arguing over something, and Raph throws his sai at a wall

It hits the wall and they hear a yelp, both turn around in a panic

The sai barely missed Y/N who was just coming in the room so now they're like, "hah I'll just come back laterrr :')" <- stressed out by a near death experience

Thank you!

You can do whateverjust Leo's and Raph's reactions, or all of their reactions, or a fic, whatever you're vibing with

Aww! I got you :) I'm doing this as if you're either of the turtle's S/O! so you can choose which you'd want to read:)

TMNT 2007 Imagines: How Leo & Raph would react if you were almost hit

As Leonardo's S/O

Ah- guys- he's pissed

He just looks at his brother with such disappointment that it makes Raph feel even more guilty than he already is.

To be fair, you learned to never get involved when there was an argument between Leonardo and Raphael, you could get hurt- seriously hurt.

They don't mess around, they will physically fight- they give no fucks

But when it's announced that Leonardo will be leaving to South America for training, Raphael is fucking livid. He interrupts Leo's meditation session and rips him a new one.

"I can't believe ya wouldn't tell us! What happened to not keepin' secrets O' Fearless One?!"

Although it may not look like it, Raphael cares a lot about his older brother. So to see him up and leave like that pisses him off.

But, he has it all wrong. Leonardo didn't want to hurt him or his other brothers with the news.

So, they argue. What about you may ask? it's beyond me. All of this pent-up anger and frustration from both sides causes an all-out yelling war. While the others are doing their own thing, you can't help but intervene. The last thing you want is a fight to break out between your boyfriend and best friend.

Just as you walk in, Raph grunts in frustration and throws his sai- and if it wasn't for your instant reflexes, you would have been gone.

You duck quickly, and when you turn around, you see how his (extremely sharp) sai just sticks in the cement wall behind you. it's at this moment that you're so lucky to be alive.

It shakes you up, and you see Raph's amber eyes go wide, he didn't mean that- he didn't even know you were standing there.

"Shit, Y/n, I ain't kno-" "Raph!? What the shell!?"

Leo's PISSED. Raph could've killed you.

This causes more arguing, as Leo goes over to you and pries the sai from the wall- throwing it to the side and putting a protective arm in front of you and standing in the middle of you and Raphael.

But, you try and leave. You don't want to be in the middle of the feud. Not again. You can't take a side. You don't want to take a side. It's not your place.

"No y/n you stay right here- RAPH. Apologize. Now."

Will literally force a sorry out of Raph and will NOT let him go until he does.

Once he apologizes (Raph does feel bad, he seriously didn't mean to nearly cause you an early death, so the sorry comes quick,) he picks up his sai and leaves the dojo.

Leo stays and makes sure you're okay after that. It's natural, you're shaken up, you feel weak in the knees, the normal. You're in shock.

That seriously could've gone south quick, and Leo thinks about it for a split second. What if it did? He doesn't want to think about it anymore. It causes him to tear up.

Leo believes in parallel universes, in a different universe, you DID wind up getting stabbed. He could only imagine how is parallel self is handling it right now.

"Deep breaths, love, I'm sorry." Once you calm down, he helps you to his room, it's very clean and bare now, as he already packed essentials for his trip. But, his bed is still the same. Same scent and everything.

Once you're in his bed, he gets you some water, and then he lays beside you, holding you, comforting you.

He apologizes. Although you stop him and tell him he has nothing to apologize for, he doesn't care. He feels responsible. He should've been more attentive. He shouldn't have continued arguing with Raph. Maybe that would've never happened if he did.

You calm down as minutes go by, and Leo asks you (for the 1000th time) if you’re feeling okay.

“Thanks to you, I am.”

His heart soars at your response. He’s always glad to help you.

As Raphael's S/O

ooh does this boy feel like shit for doing that

It’s been a rough couple of weeks, especially finding out Leo will be leaving for god knows how long

So when he barges in the dojo one day and just starts going off on Leo- letting out all of his anger, it turns into a full blown argument

“I’m doing it for you, Raph! For our family!”

Raph doesn’t wanna hear it. He wants his brother HERE. In the sewers of NYC, not 3727228 miles away.

As Raph’s S/O, you understood why he got so angry at times. He was mad at the world around him. How imperfect it can truly be, and how it can turn upside down in an instant.

You had to understand Raph before you even thought about dating him- he’s a handful. He knows that, and he tries his best for you. You know he does.

You comfort him a lot. Like that day when Leo announced he would be leaving. He was feeling so many emotions and didn’t know what to do

So he started to dislike his brother. Like right now, how he just came in the dojo and started up an argument just because he can.

“We need ya here! I need ya here!” Doesn’t Leo understand that? But, it’s also Splinter’s orders. Leo has to go.

They continue to go back and forth, and from experience and observation- you know not to try and be the mediator. That was more Splinter’s thing. But, he wasn’t around. Nobody was. Just you as you just so happen to walk by.

But, you put all those conversations between Donnie and Mikey about what you should and shouldn’t do when Leo and Raph argue and go in there to try to at least dial it down.

Note: you should NOT tell both of them to shutup, they will literally forget they’re arguing with each other and come together and tell YOU to shutup and stay out of it (via Mikey)

Back to the current situation, you walk in and hear Raph’s accented voice get louder, and as you get closer to see them both, you also see something sharp fly right in your direction

After quickly ducking and yelping in the process, Raphael and Leonardo both stop and look at you.

Barely missed. And now? You’re sitting on the floor looking at them both.

Leonardo apologizes first. He should’ve been more aware of his surroundings and stopped Raph from almost decapitating you.

Your boyfriend, on the other hand, is shocked. He’s frozen in place, watching as Leo helps you get up, and soon leaving the dojo to get Donnie as you mention that you feel your heart racing.

“I’m fine, Leo, I’m just…” too late, he’s already gone.

Raphael truly fucked up, didn’t he? The last thing he would ever want to do is hurt you. You’re practically his everything. Who he tries to be a better person (err, turtle) for.

“Shit, babe, I’m so…fuck…I’m sorry,” once Raph gets himself out of that shocked state, he comes rushing to you, not even thinking about his sai that’s sticking out the wall.

He begins to ramble, that’s what he always did when he has no grasp on his emotions. He didn’t mean to do that. He had no idea you were there. He’s sorry, so fucking sorry. He knows he could’ve hurt you-he knows.

As you feel your heart rate go down as moments pass, you just embrace your boyfriend mid ramble. You hold him. You’re okay, and you have to tell him that.

“Hey, I’m okay, see?” You say while you bury your face in his plastron, “That reflex training you taught me finally came in handy, huh?” Raph isn’t sure what to do with his hands at first, but they soon wrap around your smaller form. How can you be so sweet to him when he almost took your head off?

He apologizes sincerely once again, but…it’s okay. Things happen. You knew Raphael wouldn’t do anything to hurt you intentionally. He’s not like that towards you. He cherishes you.

You cherish him all the same.

Leo comes back with Donnie, but you insist you’re okay. Which, you are. Raph and Leo end things bittersweetly, but what matters is that it’s over. They know not to fight to that extent. Raph understands now.

Raph’s still thinking hard about what he almost did to you, and it takes a lot of reassurance for him to see that you’re truly not angry or upset at him.

And once you’ve given Raphael that reassurance, he’s feeling better.

“You’re gonna have to try harder than that to get rid of me, Raphie.” You’re using his nickname again, you’re joking with him again like you usually do, and it makes him smile. It makes him love you even more, how you can get past his fuck ups with no hard feelings. He needs someone who understands.

You understand, and that’s what he loves about you.

//

taglist:

@bee-1n-space @ducky-died-inside

Masterlist

[just-horrible-things]

There’s a bunch of different ways it can go from here. Most of them are pretty grim.

One is that Anders shoots her. He’s very on the fence both emotionally and intellectually about whether it’s the right choice. On the one hand, she reminds him of himself and the other numbers and his impulse is to help her. On the other, she’s a torturer, she’s everything he hates, she hurt Alex, he despises her. On the one hand, executing her would be fair for her crimes and a clean death would be a mercy. On the other, how can the Resistance take her life as well after committing an atrocity like this against her.

If he doesn’t kill her, Anders helps her. If he helps her, the only reasonable outcome from there is to let her go. Keeping someone prisoner indefinitely is almost as antithetical to his ideals as torture. 

How much help Anders gets her and how long she’s therefore in his care, is essentially up in the air. The situation is too close to Anders’ trauma and he’s making erratic choices. 

At the lower end, he still almost certainly gets her a (paid) healer at least once – enough to fix her ribcage before it kills her, enough to stabilise the worst of the displaced breaks. It’s a lot of damage and, although a paid healer will have more magic available than a half-starved Alex, one session of healing still leaves her extremely injured and helpless.

At the upper end – perhaps he’s thinking more about the cost to the kept healers who will undoubtedly be made to heal her otherwise – she’s his prisoner and patient until she’s more or less mobile and capable of simple self-care tasks. Still a lot of healing, natural or otherwise, to go, but at a point where she would heal naturally.

Alex wants to help, if/when he finds out what happened, because his sister did this and he feels culpable. He probably isn’t allowed. If he doesn’t see how bad it is, it’s easier for him to accept that maybe he doesn’t have to be involved.

Either way, when Anders decides he’s done enough, he leaves her somewhere out of the way with a burner phone, and either calls emergency services for her (if she’s not able to use a phone yet) or lets her do it herself. 

Ariadne goes to hospital, she gets debriefed, she gets some kind of mandated therapy (that honestly is probably more like reaffirmation of patriotism, self-sacrifice, and hatred of magic). Her family get a confusing letter of “sorry, the notification of death we sent you previously was actually in error”.

She tries to go back to work as soon as possible. She can’t really handle interrogations anymore and she’s too injured and traumatised for field work at least for a long while, so she gets a desk job. She finds it a bit tedious but it’s okay. In some branches of possibility, she does quit. In most, she sticks at it. The organisation is her support network, she doesn’t know what else she’d do.

She hates warlocks and magic more than she ever did. Why they changed their minds after torturing her and nursed her back to health and handed her back, she’s very confused about. Her lead theory is that Anders Reyan is actually just crazy. (Not too far off the truth.) But the fact remains that they tortured her pretty horrifically.

This scenario lacks the absolute undeniable self-sacrifice of Alex running off with her, so it doesn’t have the same impact on her views. She’s still a prisoner. Anders is spending resources on her, yes, but not at great personal cost. Her caretaker is not someone she personally hurt. And Anders did hurt her before he “changed his mind”. She’s left confused, not convinced she was in the wrong.

The government uses her torture as propaganda, evidence of the crimes of the cruel Resistance terrorists. X-rays of her skeleton are in the papers. She hates this, but as a loyal government agent she cannot protest. 

Taryn is in so, so much trouble. Anders is absolutely furious with her. In the immediate aftermath he screams at her, tells her she’s just as bad as their enemies, and makes her wear anti-magic cuffs because she cannot be trusted with magic. She’s devastated. Not least because she sort of agrees with him.

Daniel –  her mentor and almost-parental figure is angry too, if in a much more controlled way. Not only was it an awful thing she did, it was also thoughtless. The resulting propaganda has done serious damage to public perceptions of the Resistance. She is stripped of her semi-formal position as next-in-line to lead the Resistance in the event of Daniel’s death. She doesn’t want it anymore anyway, she’s appalled with herself.

All in all it’s a pretty dark timeline. Not the worst, but nothing is improved by things going this way.

There are other small-likelihood scenarios that branch off of this timeline, but I’ve written quite an essay anyway so I’ll stop here haha.

[crumb]

okay okay so re: this post about this gifset

tell me what you think--did Benson plan on killing everybody in the restaurant? did he plan on killing himself after? did he expect to spare Randy, or was he on the fence? was he gunning for Chris and Chris alone and anticipating having to improvise?

I just love the way this scene plays out and how, despite the horrific violence, there's still something undeniably human about Benson as he goes about it. I would LOVE to hear your take!!

Holy shit my response is so long and rambling I'm so so sorry but uhhhh here's my thoughts under a cut to save people's dashboards from my dumb brain 🙈

Omg so yes this is something I think about ALL the time. Chris is, of course, a definite 100%. He was basically dead the moment he grabbed Benson's shoulder and said "...I'll have no problem turning your peaceful redneck existence into a living hell..." Benson warned him, gave him a chance to back down from bullying Randy, but Chris doubled down so RIP lol. Which was the spark that lit the first fuse.

The rest I think may have been improvised a bit but not by much. I think he planned on killing everyone, except Randy, but wasn't sure how exactly it would all go down. There's a chance Hardy might not have heard Jess screaming and never come out of the back. Which that alone I find funny that it was Jess' shrieking and not the two shotgun blasts that managed to rip him away from his morning jerk off session. So Benson might have planned on getting Hardy in the office by surprise after doing in Chris and Jess.

Jess is interesting because Benson tries to quiet her first before getting frustrated and shooting her to shut her up. Like, was bro gonna give her some speech before offing her? I wouldn't be surprised. Something about not dating entitled dickheads? I get why some people think he might not have killed her if she stopped screaming, which is a fair theory! But I also think she's been clearly joining in on the bullying and egging on Chris with her little comments and giggling like she had been earlier that morning. So I think she was already firmly on his kill list by that point, plus she would have no use to him other than being another witness—and the whole thing wasn't about her, it was about Randy, so dragging her around with them, or leaving her behind, would be pointless and risky.

Randy Randy Randy. I don't think he ever intended on killing Randy at any point, except maybe there being the risk of it happening when he was shaken after the whole Sheppard situation. At that point, Benson was so out of his own body I think almost anything could've happened, though ultimately I don't think that would've ever been on purpose, only in a knee-jerk reaction. I do think it was a liiittle bit of a test. I think Benson, like he said in the diner (the first round lol) that seeing Randy just stand there doing nothing and waiting for Benson to kill him was the only thing he believed in. He, like Benson mentioned, had been watching Randy and knew he was smart, but also knew he wouldn't do anything to stop what was happening. But I think a small part of him was hoping he would be proved wrong, hoping Randy would do something and show some agency.

And then there's Benson. I've mentioned this before but yeah, I think throughout the film he kinda goes back and forth on having a deathwish. I think when he's having his smoke and probably semi-planning what he's gonna do he is also fully aware that this is the end of the road for him and Randy is his... I don't know, I guess one last chance at redemption before ending things. Pulling Randy back from the brink of dead-end small town small thinking monotony is his like... last hurrah. Ok well maybe killing Chris and everyone is really the last hurrah, but helping Randy figure his shit out is like his last good deed, helping Randy not end up like him. When they're driving to the diner after cleaning up BBB he's in high spirits. The relaxation and acceptance phase of his road to inevitable death/suicide. But then as things progress and he learns more about Randy and everything, once they reach the school, I think at that point he had stepped back from the ledge and was thinking, maybe wishfully thinking, that he could make it out of there. But then Sheppard had to show up and ruin everything. I think Benson had started to think that maybe things could be alright, if only he could get Randy to Ms. Beard's, get that checked off the to-do list, and then they could try escaping. But Sheppard appears and reminds Benson that no matter what he can never escape. He'll never escape what happened to him, the things he's tried to forget, or who he is. So at that point it's like trying to save a sandcastle from an incoming tide. There's no use. Benson didn't have the tools to deal with seeing Sheppard, especially not on a day like that day when he had already spilled blood three times. Chris and them, maybe they deserved it to an extent in Benson's eyes, but no one deserved it more than Sheppard. So after Sheppard he's given himself whiplash. He had accepted his death, then got hopeful, and then had the ceiling cave in on him causing him to have to re-accept his fate, though not as steadfast. There's a few points after Sheppard where it feels like Benson is mentally clawing at the oncoming events in panic. Ms. Beard getting that call and answering it before they could leave. Benson hearing the sirens after Randy calls the cops. Both times it looks like he's reliving some cosmic disappointment like even though he's had to re-accept his fate, he's still desperately looking for an off-ramp. I think that's maybe what Benson means at the end. "I was never in charge, Randy." His fate or inevitable end was in charge and was something he'd already considered set in stone. Though I think that's also due to some self-sabotage. Like Randy tried to tell him, he had the opportunity to just run and never look back but instead decided to go on some self-assigned white knight quest for Randy in circles around town. Following some perceived path to "fix" Randy in ways Benson could never fix himself. Benson is a walking self-fulfilling prophecy. So to answer your question about whether I think Benson planned on killing himself after killing Chris, Jess, and Hardy (and after "helping Randy")—in my opinion, yes, I believe so. But I also think it switches back and forth from yes to no like 15 times between them leaving BBB and watching the cops pull into the diner parking lot that night, lol.

[toxic-ship-tournament]

ROUND 3 / POLL 4

Lucille x Jo (@radioactive-dragonlover) vs Amaro x Calamari (@hottopicabbacchio & @corpsoir)

who makes up your ship?:

Lucille and Jo

why does your ship deserve to be considered the most toxic?:

Lucille is a rich woman who has nothing to do in her life, she's eternally bored and wishes for something new— something fresh to happen. Jo is a quiet woman with some repressed violent tendencies and who works minimum wage bug is struggling to make ends meets. One night, Jo decides to rob Lucille's mansion and kills her without meaning to in the process, escaping the scene anxiously thinking she's going to go to jail once the body is found. However, Lucille wakes up the next day, with the events of the murder burnt into her mind but her body spared of any wounds. Turns out getting killed is EXACTLY the spice in life she was waiting for! So she decided to track down and knock on her murder's door— not to rat her out, but to ask her to do it again. Jo wasn't really for murdering again, especially with how anxious she ended up getting in the aftermath, but begrudgingly accepts. And it seems that Lucille IS actually very fun to kill for her, too. Cue to Jo murdering Lucille on a Weekly basis, getting very Gay about it each time. Lucille get the thrill of death she wanted, and Jo gets an outlet for her violence. A relationship starting as purely transactional at first slowly turns into a murder romance. They're both kinda fucked up in isolation to one another but complete eachother awfully well. Like "you two are perfect for eachother but never pull anyone else into your bullshit" kinda deal. They keep eachother contained. You feel me.

ship tags/playlists/pinterest boards?:

Ship tag on my art blog ( nihonium-art ) : Undying love ( although fair warning for gore ) Playlist : https://spotify.link/TPbt2y12Syb

****

who makes up your ship?:

amaro (he/him, by hottopicabbacchio) calamari (he/they, by corpsoir)

why does your ship deserve to be considered the most toxic?:

Amaro used his stand (make you fall in love) on a lot of people, Calamari came around and he used his stand on them for one night too, but Calamari kept coming back after the effect wore off so Amaro continued to use his stand for a bit being afraid of him leaving/because he thought it would be fun. Eventually, Amaro realized that he had stopped using his stand on Calamari and actually fell in love with them. They have a good 3 year run where they're together and fine and in love UNTIL. one day going on a job for information (mafia business), Amaro is talking/flirting some of the information out of the guy theyre after and Calamari over hears some guys talking about how "Amaro is after another one" and how they had been affected by his stand power before. It gets Calamari thinking if Amaro had used his stand on them before (yes, but only at the beginning) and they start thinking that the whole relationship had been a lie. They get in a big argument - Calamari confronting Amaro while Amaro desperately tried to prove to Calamari he hadn't been using his stand for years - and they end up breaking up. After about a month, Amaro gets worried about not seeing Calamari around and goes to their apartment that he still haa the spare key too and goes inside to find him. Instead, he finds a mess and Calamari eating cold pizza in an empty bathtub alone. Calamari half agrees for Amaro to stay and help them clean, which they assume and know thats the only reason they would have come, and doesnt believe Amaro about their relationship no matter what he tries to say. Over time - a cleaning session maybe once a week or so with Calamari making as little talk to Amaro as possible and Amaro just wanting to make things right again - Calamari suddenly realizes that he might be falling in love with Amaro again and confronts him about using his stand again and tells him to show her to them. Amaro had made a vow to himself to not use his stand around Calamari ever again, but caves and shows Calamari that the swords (where his stand power is) are all still there. Currently, they are working on getting back to how they were before, but there is still Issues and Problems <3 They both want it back but Calamari still cant trust Amaro but Amaro had never been in love with someone like that before

ship tags/playlists/pinterest boards?:

https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4AcBeDHX48BYcmdda13KNL?si=fkg9IR4NT5Klw4bUt-0QoQ&utm_source=copy-link playlist by hottopicabbacchio, character tags on both op blogs under amaro avvoltoio and calamari pavone

[pyropsychiccollector]

Irina: Right! Now that Kayano-chan's back with us, we can get to that special training I promised last week. (❋•‿•❋)

Kaede: … What's Professor Bitch on about? >_>

Yukiko: Nobody knows. (✿◠‿◠);;; During our English lessons last week, she made some giddy announcement about training that none of us could get her to elaborate on…

Rio: She DID say we all needed to be here for it. (✿◠‿◠)(✿◠‿◠)(✿◠‿◠)

Nagisa: … I have a bad feeling about this… ಠಿ_ಠ

Karma: Aw, don't say that! (❋•‿•❋) Bitch-sensei must have a grand idea if Kayano-chan needed to be here~

Kaede: Why are you saying that so ominously?! (╬≖_≖) Now I see where Nagisa's coming from.

Rio: You WOULD. (✿◠‿◠)(✿◠‿◠)(✿◠‿◠)

Karma: (❋•‿•❋) shows pic of Nagisa kissing Kaede from last week

Kaede: Will you DELETE THOSE ALREADY?!?!?! (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)

Karma and Rio: No. (❋•‿•❋)

Irina: (✿◠‿◠)*** If the peanut gallery would kindly shut up, I would be glad to give you your instructions. Be good brats and take out a sheet of paper. You only need to write down the names of three classmates you would prefer to practice seduction lessons on. That's it.

Everyone: … ಠಿ_ಠ WHAT?!

Hinata: Seduction lessons?!?!?!

Okajima: You mean like taking babes' clothes off?! __

Isogai: (✿◠‿◠);;; This doesn't sound kosher…

Meg: Because it's not. (╬≖_≖) Who authorized giving Junior high kids seduction lessons?!

Irina: I did. (❋•‿•❋) Stop being babies and sack it up. You wanted to learn to be kickass assassins, and one of the tools you'll have is seduction~

Rinka: We're training to kill the Octopus, not drag him into bed. (╬≖_≖)

Irina: Yeah, well, you know how he gets all orgasmic about you kids pairing off. (❋•‿•❋) There's a good chance you can distract him with lovey-dovey shit, and the rest of you can go in for the kill~

Touka: Well… I guess that makes a weird sort of sense…

Hinano: Can we put down teacher names?! _

Irina: Meh, sure, why not?

Kaede: ……… This is because of last week, isn't it? (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)

Irina: (❋•‿•❋) The inspiration hardly matters. What's important. You don't have to worry about advanced techniques yet. Right now we'll only be practicing kissing.

Itona: With three people of our choosing?

Irina: Yup. Gotta be fair and spread the love around~… Well. It's more practice than anything else. Get you used to kissing fast. (❋•‿•❋)

Kaede: (╬≖_≖) Three names, you said?

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; … Why me…?

Irina: The only rule is NO BLANK PAPERS! Everything else goes! (❋•‿•❋)

Yukiko: … Oh. Okay. (✿◠‿◠)

Rio: I like this. (❋•‿•❋)

Yuzuki: Loopholes are great. (❋•‿•❋)

Irina: … Eh? Why do you brats look so smug? (╬≖_≖)

Kaede: ≖‿≖ Just because YOU'RE a bitch, doesn't mean the rest of us are.

Irina: Will you all cut that cheeky crap out?! Turn your papers in if you're done!!! (╬ಠ益ಠ)

~*~

an awkward hour of kissing later, end of the day

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; Not to sound ungrateful, Professor Bitch, but why can't I go home?

Irina: pinches his cheek Because, my dear sweet Casanova, as you might have noticed you didn't get any action during that practice session. (❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: Well, yeah. I mean, I was hardly the only one. Okajima only got to kiss the three he wanted to. A lot of the guys were like that. ಠಿ_ಠ

Irina: (❋•‿•❋) Ah, but they DID get kissing. YOU didn't even get the ones on your list.

Nagisa: … I just figured we were out of time. It's not that big of a deal. (✿◠‿◠);;;

Irina: On the contrary, it's a very big deal. ≖‿≖ Turns out you were quite popular on the surveys. Some smartasses even listed you thrice. ≖‿≖*** Well, it was my fault for not considering repeats as a way for people to get out of spreading the love around. Oh well. You got a long afternoon ahead of ya. (❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: You could list repeats?!?!?! (⊙▂⊙✖ )

Irina: (❋•‿•❋) Thank YOU for being a better sport and listing three different girls~ Gave me plenty of data. (❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: ……… I need an adult.

Irina: I AM an adult. (❋•‿•❋) slides open the classroom door, hauling Nagisa back in Okaaay~ Everybody here? counts off … Yep, all nine of you. Fantastico~… (❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: (⊙▂⊙✖ ) staring … H-How many of you guys listed…me…?

Kaede: head buried in arms to hide her crimson face, raises hand

Yukiko: shyly raises hand

Rio: shamelessly raises hand

Rinka: awkwardly waves hand

Yuzuki: proudly waves hand Loopholes! (✿◠‿◠)

Touka: chirps brightly, waves hand After seeing you put Kayano-chan out of commission, I just had to know! (✿◠‿◠) ignores Kaede's indignant squawk

Hinata: meekly raises hand

Hinano: waves hand guilt-free I didn't know about the loophole, but Mister K said I only got one chance anyway! (✿◠‿◠)

Ritsu: raises hand with a dead serious expression No one else struck me as attractive with kissing.

Nagisa: (⊙▂⊙✖ ) All of you…?!

Irina: (❋•‿•❋)*** Yup. And just about all of them listed you three times. Kurahashi only gets the one, Hayami twice, but everyone else was a smartass. Though if this training goes well, you might have a promising future ahead of you. (❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: P-Promising future?! (⊙▂⊙✖ ) doesn't want to hurt any of their feelings, he's nervous as hell

Irina: Let's get that hit rate up, okay? pinches Nagisa's cheek No excuses this time~

Nagisa: … mutters I'm so dead by the end of this. ಠಿ_ಠ

~*~

Hinata: D-Don't get any weird ideas!! >////////<* I picked you because you and Isogai were the least troublesome boys, and I figured Isogai was gonna have a line a mile long… I never pegged YOU as a womanizer! >///////////<*

Nagisa: I'm not!!!!!! (⊙▂⊙✖ ) God's honest truth, I didn't even WANT to put names down, but Professor Bitch said no blanks…!

Hinata: … huffs I guess that's true. You're like the opposite of that idiot Maehara… >///////////>*** Let's just get this over with. Can't believe I had to put you down three freaking times……..

one lengthy session later

Irina: Alright, break it up~ You can go home, Okano-chan. You're done. (❋•‿•❋)

Hinata: (⊙▂⊙✖ ) Wh-What do you MEAN done?! W-We only just got started!!

Nagisa: ಠಿಠ zoned out after three kiss sessions went by in a barely lucid haze Tha… ಠಿಠ struck speechless at how much he liked it

Hinata: Youuu…! >///////////////<* F-Fine, but we're practicing later, you big perverted j-jerk!!! @/////////////@* runs out the door, steam whistling out of her ears, beet red face

Nagisa: ಠಿ_ಠ

Irina: Ufufu. Seems Kayano-chan wasn't an accident. (❋•‿•❋)

~*~

Hinano: I don't expect too much from you. Mister K will always be my #1! (✿◠‿◠)

Nagisa: Th-That's fine, Hinano-chan. (✿◠‿◠);;; We only have to do it the once.

Hinano: Just pucker up already. (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

a couple minutes later

Hinano: Wha?! It's over?! Σ('◉⌓◉’)

Irina: You had to come up for air sometime, sweetie. (❋•‿•❋) You can go home.

Hinano: Σ('◉⌓◉’) looking very conflicted at Nagisa

Nagisa: ಠಿ_ಠ I-Is it over yet? glad he only had to kiss Hinano once, but it was a kiss sessions he didn't want to end

Irina: Not even close, dear. (❋•‿•❋)

Hinano: Σ('◉⌓◉’) nudged out the door and questioning whether she liked kissing Mister K or Nagisa more

~*~

Ritsu: I have performed the necessary research while awaiting my turn. I am reasonably confident practice will be a nonissue. (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

Nagisa: … (✿◠‿◠);;; You…studied? Like, watched clips or something?

Ritsu: nods sagely Clips. Read up on specific techniques. I am certain I will "wow" you, Nagisa-kun. (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑)

Nagisa: ……….. doesn't want to be hearing this right now Let's… just get this over with. (✿◠‿◠);;;

three lengthy, dizzying rounds later

Ritsu: Over? (☉_ ☉) This cannot be. I swear to you, we only just got started. (☉_ ☉)

Irina: (✿◠‿◠)** Yeah, well, hate to break it to ya, computer junkie. But you were about to go for Round 4. I can't let you do that… Wouldn't be fair to everyone waiting.

Ritsu: Impossible. (☉_ ☉) My mind went blank and I forgot everything I learned. I merely reacted to Nagisa-kun… This is troubling. Nagisa-kun seduced me. (☉_ ☉)

Nagisa: I'm telling you, it was as much of a blank for me!! ಠಿ_ಠ

Ritsu: Untrue. You were singularly focused into overwhelming my senses. (☉_ ☉) Do not lie to me.

Nagisa: twitching violently, unable to deny that he was…focused…on the exercise after Ritsu promised she'd studied up ಠಿ_ಠ I was hoping to learn a little bit more than that… You said you studied! DX

Ritsu: (☉_ ☉) We will have to save it for…next time…

Nagisa: ಠಿ_ಠ twitching

~*~

Rinka: I did kiss Chiba earlier, just as a head's up… >///<***

Nagisa: That's…okay? ಠಿ_ಠ I mean, if you like Chiba, I'm not going to tear you away from him…

Rinka: huffs It's not like that. >///<* I mean… He's a good friend. But I don't honestly know anything about this lovey-dovey stuff. I put you down twice cuz you obviously had the skills, knocking out Kayano… But I didn't know if Professor Bitch would allow that. So I put Chiba down as a fallback. >///<* Should have just went with my gut.

Nagisa: … ಠಿ_ಠ Everyone keeps bringing that up, but I was just saving her life… Anyone would have done the same.

Rinka: groans Just come here. I'm tired of hearing you all down in the dumps. >///<***

couple rounds later

Rinka: >///////////////////<*** Just blind luck, my ass.

Nagisa: ಠಿಠ I'm pretty sure you were pretty… experienced… Yourself. ಠಿಠ

Rinka: No. >/////////////////<*** I'm a damn greenhorn, and I just refused to roll over for you. That's all. This is supposed to be practice, so I have it my all, too. Thanks for not holding back, but I've got a long way to go.

Nagisa: ಠಿ_ಠ I don't think that at all… W-We can try again later?

Rinka: Goes without saying. @/////////////@***

~*~

Yuzuki: Fufufu. My time to shine! (＾ω＾)

Nagisa: ಠಿ_ಠ I'm surprised you wanted to kiss me, Yuzuki? I mean, I'm not even that good.

Yuzuki: That's not what Kayano-chan's starstruck face said. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) And I'll have you know I came prepared! I rewatched a bunch of lovey-dovey anime that featured this very type of scenario!! You have no chance! (＾ω＾)

Nagisa: huffs out a sigh I keep telling you guys, it was no big deal… (✿◠‿◠);;; But if you think you're prepared, I'm…happy for you? I'll try and learn from you, Yuzuki-sensei.

Yuzuki: Don't patronize me! ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I'll have you roll over and beg me for more!!

A few heated sessions later

Irina: Alright, break it up, you two. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Fuwa-chan, you look sweaty~… Your shirt is not doin' so hot. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Yuzuki: It's…….over? (☉_ ☉) No. No, no, no!!! It can't be over!!!!!! (☉_ ☉) shakes Nagisa like a ragdoll Gimme back my three lives, damn you!!! I didn't get to show you anything!!!!! (⊙▂⊙✖ )

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; still kinda spacey I think you showed me p-plenty, Yuzuki-sensei… G-Give yourself more credit. (☉_ ☉)

Yuzuki: @~~~@*** Unacceptable!!! It can't be over…! getting yanked by Irina to the exit I-I still have my Ace to play! J-Just gimme one more chance!! DX

Irina: Nope… (✿◠‿◠)*** swats Yuzuki's hand away before she can strip off her soaked, sweaty jacket Advanced techniques come LATER. What part of that do you not understand?!

Nagisa: watches them go, shivering (☉_ ☉) Can I go home yet? doesn't know how much more he can take

~*~

Irina: (✿◠‿◠)*** Touka, dear. Clothes stay ON, you got that?

Touka: (＾ω＾) Of course, Sensei! I am a professional!

Nagisa: (☉_ ☉) I know you're besties with Kaede, Touka… But you wanted to kiss me, too? Seriously??

Touka: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) After seeing the mess you made of Kaede-chan, I just had to see how I stacked up~ You're pretty formidable, Nagisa-kun. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; You guys give me too much credit… I have nothing to offer…

Touka: We'll just see about that! (＾ω＾)

a few steamy sessions later

Irina: ………… (✿◠‿◠)*** Right. You guys are done. Touka. Go home.

Touka: was prevented from removing her sweat-soaked shirt every time throughout the sessions >:[ Mean, Sensei. It's getting hot in here. Just let me-

Irina: I SAID GO HOME!!!!! (✿◠‿◠)*

Nagisa: (☉_ ☉) feeling sooo conflicted about Irina interfering in Touka's attempts at "cooling off" Actually… It is p-pretty warm in here…

Irina: (✿◠‿◠)*** Nagisa, don't think I didn't notice how you kept groping where your hands didn't belong.

Touka: Pshaw. They were right where they were supposed to be. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) Let's meet up later, Nagisa. Alone. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

Nagisa: (☉_ ☉) hardly has willpower to refuse such an invitation

Irina: For the last time, you knuckleheads…! Advanced techniques…….ARE FOR LATER!!!!!!!! (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)

~*~

Yukiko: (✿◠‿◠);;; I didn't think my turn would ever come…

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; I'm pretty sure Professor Bitch was always going to make us see it to the end… B-Besides, I did put you down on my list…

Yukiko: Really? (❋•‿•❋) I-I was afraid I'd be too…plain for you… >w<*

Nagisa: N-Not at all!!! (✿◠‿◠);;;;;;; You're amazing, Yukiko… I know probably every guy in class had you on their list…

Yukiko: Well… I suppose there's some truth to that… (๑•́ ₃ •̀๑) But even if I'm considered… popular… I don't think that about myself at all. >//////////////<* A-And besides, I was curious why you never got a turn… I'm glad you ARE appreciated, even if that means a wait time for me. >///<*

Nagisa: Honestly, this is surreal for me… I'm not that special at all… >///<***

Yukiko: Not true!!! ٩(๑ `н´๑)۶ You're VERY special!!!

Irina: Could you two lovebirds get to it already? (╬≖‿≖) As much fun as this is, I'd like to go home, too. (╬≖‿≖)

Yukiko: L-Lovebirds?! Σ('◉⌓◉’)

Nagisa: B-But Yukiko's way out of my league!!! (⊙▂⊙✖ )

Irina: Just shaddup and pucker up already!!! (╬≖‿≖)

a few dreamy sessions later

Nagisa: (☉_ ☉)

Yukiko: short-circuiting from how happy she is (✿◠‿◠)

Nagisa: unable to tear Yukiko off from her adoring hug she's got him trapped in (☉_ ☉) … Not sure if he wants to be free

Irina: Time to go home, Yukiko-chan! (✿◠‿◠)*** picks her up by the back of the neck like a kitten and scootches her to the door

~*~

Rio: (❋•‿•❋) Myyy tuuurn~

Nagisa: (⊙▂⊙✖ ) B-But I got done with Touka…! I was supposed to be safe from hereon. Σ('◉⌓◉’)

Rio: Oh, I'll keep you safe, hubby. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I'll blow all those others away~…

Nagisa: staring horrified at Irina (⊙▂⊙✖ ) N-No crossdressing allowed, right?

Irina: (❋•‿•❋)*** Clothes stay on, Nagisa. You know the drill by now.

Rio: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) I'm cool with clothes on. We can get nice and oily just like this~… rubs up against Nagisa sensually

Irina: Advanced techniques…LATER. (╬ಠ益ಠ)

a few steamy sessions later

Rio: standing over Nagisa faceplanted on the floor I'm the best~ (＾ω＾)

Irina: sighs Yes, yes, Rio darling. You can continue your kissy obsession later. (╬≖‿≖) Nagisa still has one more to get through.

Nagisa: …

Rio: I'll wait outside~ (＾ω＾)

Irina: HOME. (╬≖‿≖)

~*~

Kaede: >////////////<*** I was hoping Professor Bitch would get bored by now…

Nagisa: sighs (✿◠‿◠);;; She's not. She's filmed each one.

Kaede: WHAT?! (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)

Irina: (✿◠‿◠) For feedback purposes~ Relaaax~

Kaede: I'M GONNA MURDER YOU!!!!! (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; L-Let's just get this done and go home, Kaede. I won't let her humiliate you.

Kaede: E-Eh…? @///////@*** W-Well… If… If you don't mind, Nagisa…

Irina: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) starts filming

a few hot minutes later

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; Professor Bitch, Kaede passed out… Again…

Irina: I saw. (❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋)(❋•‿•❋) You were a real stud~… All that practice paid off~…

Nagisa: (✿◠‿◠);;; Can you…take her home?

Irina: Nope! I've got business to attend to. Don't worry, you can ask Karasuma where she lives. (❋•‿•❋) Don't do anything I would~ leaves a deeply disturbed Nagisa holding a limp, unconscious, but content Kaede in his arms

Nagisa: Professor Bitch!!! (╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ)(╬ಠ益ಠ) Grrr… walks into teacher's lounge … (☉_ ☉) does an about face when he sees that Mr. Karasuma has gone home for the day, and instead all the other girls are sitting in there waiting for him

Rio: You're not getting away that easily! (❋•‿•❋)

Nagisa: gets yanked back into the office with Kaede in tow, door sliding shut (⊙▂⊙✖ ) I need an adult…!

[thisaccountisagainstmywill]

I've begun an evil Honor mode playthrough with my Old Man Gaming Squad. And it's slightly less chaos this time around but by FAR more of a disaster. I'm playing Bazahl the Duergar Rogue this go around. We've been trying to do an evil game where we don't kill everyone, but instead do the actual evil plot line. (Hint: It's not going well.)

The beginning of Baz's real bad night. Night events keep triggering on me for some reason this session. This session I started with the Lae'zel "Oh we're transforming, I better slit your throat." I am not the face of this playthrough (or the last one), so I failed all the checks to convince her not to hurt me.

Someone asked "What happens if you just give in?" We do science in this house so of course I tried. Well, kids the news is: She kills you. Then after she kills you, she goes hostile and fights the rest of your camp. And for some reason Gale goes hostile too. (Boy's confused but he's got the spirit.) So because of the issue with killing Gale causing an end game state after three days, we're scrambling to fix it. Lae'zel we can handle being gone. She killed me and me is important we have no other rogue. We try bonking Gale. But bonking is bugged. We force restart the game, no good. We scramble around and eventually have to just kill Gale, we can't end combat we're in camp and we have no potions. His projection spawns and we go through all of that. Gale gets rezzed and we're Gucci. Sometimes a Wizard just needs his reset button pressed. In the mess of trying to get the other players back into the game I end up having to play through everyone's Dream Visitor Night 1 so they can get in. So I get to see everyone's Dream Visitors.

My dream visitor is real damn fine for someone I just hit random on a bunch of times. (✿◡‿◡)

The old men, however, were boring in their picks. Lae'zel is gone in the morning (we bonked her out, so she might be alive) and I'm alive again. We're good. We can go to the Grove, evil campaign back on schedule. WRONG We invade the Grove and everything goes fine. However, for some reason Minthara 'My Queen and Light of My Life' Baenre's sexual advances dialogue keeps triggering on my character despite never having spoken to her. Against my better wishes I turn her down. My Queen went immediately hostile at the party and now every Goblin is hostile. Its Honor Mode so we can't reload.

Moments before disaster.

Afterwards I'm getting yelled at going, "Why didn't you just sleep with her?!" Me: "Have you seen her scene?! " Old Man: "No!"

Me: "It's pretty explicit! It would be like watching porn with my uncles." Old Man: "Oh fair, I guess. But I would have done it."

Me: "I know you would've....that's so weird. Why did it trigger on me?"

Sleep well my bonked out Queen. I hope I see you at Moonrise. But I doubt it. Now every single Goblin back at the Goblin camp is aggressive. We've ruined our chances of having a nice and normal Evil Campaign. We're going full murder hobo. No one will survive. Zarys and the Underdark vendors are the only vendors we have left in Act 1. Everyone else is dead but we need to get to them still.

Conclusion: Honor Mode really isn't the place to be testing out new story paths. ƪ(˘⌣˘)ʃ

[irkimatsu]

face sitting, incest play, cgl, and breeding

have fun~!

Facesitting:

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

Ohhhh the things I have written about Husk and facesitting. My man loves him some ass. Get that ass on his face this instant, the fatter the better. He'll feast for as long as you let him, rough tongue lapping over your cheeks and hole, claws digging into your thighs, a purr rumbling against your body... he's in bliss.

Doesn't mind being on the giving end of a good face sit, either, though it'll probably turn into 69 shortly enough. Not fair that you get to feast while leaving him to starve!

CGL:

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

This is one Husk is supremely embarrassed about and would deny to his dying breath to anyone other than a receptive partner. He's not like that! He's not some creepy old man!

...but god damn it I love that creepy old man. I may not fit the most traditional definition of a little, but I still love being taken care of by him, both physically and emotionally, and he loves having someone to protect as well. Being called "daddy" gives him the world's most embarrassed boner. (Well, not so embarrassed when he was an Overlord regularly picking up younger partners in the casino, but he'd like to leave that chapter of his life well behind him, thanks.) Even just getting to cuddle and say sweet things to his babydoll is so fulfilling for him...

...just don't let someone like Angel ever walk in on a CGL cuddling session. We'll never hear the end of it. Talk about daddy issues.

Which leads into...

Incest:

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

Turn the shame up to 11. In reality, it's a fuck no. Do not even slightly imply that he ever would have done anything to his daughters, he will fucking kill you and never feel the slightest remorse.

...but as roleplay with someone who already likes being his baby...

I wonder how far he'd take it? Consent's important to him, so I doubt he'd ever even roleplay a noncon scenario. But being able to teach his baby how to feel good, and how to make him feel good in turn... hearing them put on a cute little voice that stops short of forced, maybe teasing him by wearing cutely revealing clothes and squirming in his lap... fuck fuck fuck this should not turn him on what the fuck. But no matter how they're behaving, this is still the fully-grown adult he loves, and they do want this, so... maybe it's okay to enjoy the power play. It's not about hurting them, it's about teaching them, doing something good for them.

He'll try to deny his interest in the seedier aspects of the roleplay, but-

"Mmm... daddy... are you sure it'll fit? It's so big..."

Oh fuck. Right to his ego, then right down to his dick.

"You're a good doll, I'm sure you can take it..."

(I wonder if he'd also enjoy the forbidden aspect of it? Part of me wants to say no but another part of me is horny.

"We shouldn't be doing this, daddy..."

"You think so? You want me to stop?"

"...no. Keep going..."

"That's it, that's a good doll. Letting me do all this to you even though you know it's wrong... you're learning how to be daddy's little slut so quickly...")

Breeding:

No | rather not | I dunno | I guess | Sure | Yes | FUCK yes | Oh god you don’t even know |

This one's complicated to mark for Husk. When he's in his right mind, breeding doesn't do much for him. Sure, he loves to give a good creampie, but he knows he's infertile now, and even if he wasn't he has zero interest of bringing any kids into Literal Hell. It doesn't even appeal to him as a fantasy. Just take his cum and don't think too hard about what it'd do if you were both still human.

But every couple months or so, he goes into rut and his brain turns into thoughtless mush that can only think of mating and kits. When in this mental state, he loves when you beg him to fill you up with his kits. He loves nuzzling against your stomach after the act, delirious with heat, mumbling about how good you're gonna look, all swollen with his young. Loves sucking your chest, purring about how he can't wait to see that swell, too, maybe even get to taste your milk. (Whether or not you actually have breasts is irrelevant.) The thought will likely turn him on enough to go a few more rounds. Hope you didn't have plans today.

But after a few days he'll return to normal, and he'll remember exactly what his mental process was while in rut. He's glad you had fun but oh my god don't remind him that the rut shit keeps happening to him, what fucking jackass made him reincarnate as a fucking cat

[chacegraves]

The Legend Of Heroes: Trails in the Sky FC Review

Depth, Detail, and a sense that the world you're exploring is lived in.

The Legend of Heroes: Trails in The Sky First Chapter had a reputation that intrigued me. I've heard that it's an incredibly slow game that's packed with text. That the purpose of this game was to serve as a 50 hour prologue to it's sequel, Second Chapter. And that it apparently has a brutal cliffhanger that justifies all of that. It does. I'm literally only writing this review in an attempt to stop myself from burning through the next game too fast. The reputation it has for being slow is very earned but being in the mood for a slow burn experience made that a lot less jarring. I can't recommend this game to people who don't want to read a lot though. It will kill the game for you.

In First Chapter you play as Joshua and Estelle Bright. Two 16 year old kids being raised by a legendary bracer named Cassius Bright. Bracers are a guild of freelance mercenaries with a very specific moral compass. Namely to help people. They'll get rid of monsters, save a cat from a tree, escort people from town to town, etc. They just can't intervene with the military or politics of any nation. Joshua and Estelle want to become full fledged Bracers just like their father but in order to do that they need recommendations from guild branches all over their kingdom.

You'll go from town to town picking up odd jobs from the local guild branch in order to complete enough work to earn that branches recommendation. All the while getting a familiarity with each town you go to and the people who live in it. A Bracer has a duty to the people after all. It may sound like pretty standard JRPG fair but this game does something incredible when it comes to talking to the townsfolk.

Minor advancements in the story will give EVERY person in a town something new to say, and this happens several times per town. A lot of these people have little storylines during your stay and may even pop up in future towns. Some will talk about what's going on in the story but others are absorbed in their own dramas. You don't have to go out of your way to talk to everyone but you will miss out on lore and flavor if you don't. There's a lot of fun stories and characters to discover. I've had entire play sessions just being talking to townsfolk because the story advanced a little. I really hope the sequel remembers these background characters.

The towns are gorgeous and they know it too. Every time you get to a new one you'll get this nice sweeping shot of the streets and points of interest. Each town has their own personality to them that keeps the game fresh but it goes beyond the aesthetic of the town itself. Each building feels intricately designed in a way that actually baffles me. Someone put thought into these buildings making sense in a way they genuinely didn't have to for a JRPG. There'll be rooms that you'll never have to enter for any reason but they'll be filled with props and purpose because THAT BUILDING would need that room.

I remember being blown away that a weapons shop had an out of the way stock room that I never had to go into but was still decorated top to bottom. It makes the world feel so much more lived in. This game revels in detail on every level and it's easy to see the love that went into this world feeling like a real place with real people.

My biggest fear for future entries is that they stop this level of detail with the townspeople and their surroundings. I can understand them not doing some of this when we switch to a more traditional 3D view without the set camera angles but it would still be disappointing. Only time will tell if they can keep that up!

That said the main cast are so charming as well. Joshua and Estelle's bickering is hilarious and got several laughs out of me. Joshua being this calm and subdued rogue countered by Estelle being a rage tornado is so funny.

There's a solid party to build in this one and they all bounce off of each other in fun ways. They'll be swapped in and out as the story progresses and I liked that compared to just collecting them all. It makes it feel like they have things to do aside from hanging out with you. My favorite party member is easily Zin. He's this massive bear of a man who is also a monk. My favorite character is Nial though. He's basically just Spike Spiegel as a reporter and I adore him.

Despite this game having magic and ridiculous airships it all manages to feel VERY grounded because they explain the hell out of it. Orbments are the way you access magic and skills and you get a literal manual explaining how it all works. Depending on the combination of quartz you install you'll get certain abilities or stat increases. Every characters abilities can be customized to your liking but some have certain elemental preferences. I really like how customizable this system is.

The airships are these hulking technical marvels with all these cool moving parts and when you actually get inside and explore them you can see how thought out the vehicle is. There's so much technology world building like this in the game that kind of teeters on steampunk or something similar. They have these cute chunky designs that I like staring at.

I should probably mention the combat at some point! It's turn based with moves that can change the turn order of everyone taking part in the combat. Random effects like critical hits appear on the turn counter and if you delay someones attack someone else might get that random effect. It's pretty engaging because if you don't pay attention you could give that critical hit to an enemy. It's a solid system all around and I never got bored of it. There's some awesome special attacks too!

I loved this game and can't wait to play it's sequel. The world building is fantastic. The environments feel lived in and atmospheric. I love the people that inhabit them and all their quirks. The writing is genuinely funny and heartwarming at times. The politics and subterfuge were engaging. I love the party we've assembled so far and can't wait to see more of what they get up to. First Chapter felt like reading a REALLY good book or watching one of those anime that just suck you into their world. It's a fantastic experience that I recommend heartily to anyone that can stand a bit of reading and a slow start because this meticulous set up is clearly going somewhere incredible.

[nebulablakemurphy]

Through Love And By Love (Pt. 12)

Summary: Twenty-Two years ago, Draco Malfoy used the imperius curse to slow Voldemort’s rise to power. No good deed goes unpunished. Warning: this series contains mature subject matter surrounding use of the imperius curse, discussions of trauma and mental illness; reader discretion advised.

18+ ONLY this chapter contains sexual content.

Part 11

Rosanna comes to with steady chatter around her.

“Shook the whole bloody ministry!”

“Oh please.”

“Careful, these walls have ears.”

Someone is there, carding her hair, softly massaging her temples.

Draco, it has to be, Draco.

He was taught the art of legillimacy and occlumency by his aunt Bellatrix. It wasn’t until he met Rosanna that he learned it didn’t have to hurt. Legillimacy does not have to be the searing stab of a blade. It could be a loving caress, a quiet exchange of information.

When Rosanna began invading his mind forcefully, to hone her skills for the ministry, there was pain. Gritting teeth, clenched fists and big fat tears welled up in her eyes. She hated hurting him. They were advised to have another occlumen step in, but Draco was adamant she practice on only him.

“The mind holds intimacies which even our bodies cannot comprehend. I’d rather you didn’t share such things with a stranger. Learn with me; be vulnerable with me, then take your knowledge into the world once you are prepared.”

“Ok,” Rosanna agrees. She’d rather it be him than anyone else.

There is a closeness there, a bond formed during late nights in the privacy of their bedroom that only they would ever understand. And when Rosanna finally learns to break down the walls of his mind entirely, Draco insists that he be the one to teach her true occlumency.

The crash course he’d given to deceive Bellatrix was just that, a half assed Hail Mary between teenagers. But they are older now. They have more time.

Forcing himself past Rosanna’s mental barrier is excruciating at first. Her tear stained cheeks return, with cries of discomfort echoing from the walls. His magic stabs at her, scratches and claws its way in.

“Enough.” Draco attempts to end the session, when her wailing is loud enough to be heard outside, if not for the silencing charm.

“No, I can do it.” Rosanna insists as he sets his wand aside, collecting her in his arms.

“Advanced occlumency is not a skill one learns on a whim, certainly not all in one night.” He hadn’t gone easy on her either.

He fucks any farther argument out of her and she lets him. Cumming until she can’t anymore. Even the sex is different, better now. All consuming.

“Look at me, Rosanna.”

“I can’t.” It’ll kill her, the intensity of it.

Draco nudges at her cheek with his nose. “I will teach you everything I know, in due time. In return, you’re going to give me your eyes while you cum for me.”

The trade isn’t exactly a fair one, but they both deliver on their end of the bargain.

Draco so rarely uses legillimacy on her that Rosanna is shocked to find him trying. To his credit, Draco is gentle, incredibly so, stroking her hair all the while. Like pressing kisses to a wound. He pours over the details of Rabastan’s questioning, forcing himself deeper each time she attempts to put him out.

Why can’t she get him out? She pushes back with enough force that Draco grunts, their connection severed with a stinging snap.

“Oh good,” he muses, “you’re up.”

Rosanna opens her eyes to make sense of it. She is on the lush velveteen couch of her husband’s office, slumped against him.

Harry and Hermione are hovering over the case file on Draco’s desk a few feet away.

Rosanna tries to sit up.

“Easy.” Draco warns, helping to steady her.

“My head-”

“The Gryffindor in you dies hard, I’ll have you know. I couldn’t get a handle on your magic until you fainted and even then you fought me. Bravery and courage are not personality traits, they are personality disorders.” He informs his wife, reaching over for a potion vile and uncorking it.

“They’re not disorders.” She says, gulping down the liquid. Relief is almost instantaneous.

“They are when you believe your only purpose is to serve the greater good. When your bravery leads you to think that your life is meaningless and should be sacrificed at the first opportunity. You’re not afraid of anything, I wish you were. It would keep you safe, at the very least afford you a shred of self preservation.”

"I am afraid of things." She corrects him. "I'm afraid of the people I love getting hurt.”

"I will protect you and that which you love, at any cost.” He vows. There’s no need to spend the rest of her days on the front lines.

"Doesn’t sound too self preserving,” Ro accuses.

"There is no me without you, keeping you alive is as self preserving as it gets."

"Are you still that disgustingly in love with me after all this time?" Rosanna wonders, her tone isn't patronizing, but genuinely curious.

"I suspect I'll always be disgustingly in love with you. Is that going to be an issue?" The man arches a brow.

"No,” Rosanna bites back a grin, as she traces a finger over the furrow of his brows, smoothing it flat. “You and me both.”

He pecks a kiss to her outstretched hand, the same one he’d sliced open and pressed against his own, not long before. “There’s work to be done.” Draco says, flicking his gaze to Potter and Granger, pointedly.

There’s always work to be done.

————————————————————————

Leo receives word about the information leak within the ministry, printed promptly across the front page of the Daily Prophet.

A confidence breech within the Ministry of Magic has released hundreds of sealed case files, including but not limited to that of Draco Malfoy’s abduction and imprisonment, of then girlfriend, Rosanna McVay. Both Draco and Rosanna Malfoy have refused to provide statements at this time.

There’s only one place she can go, not to her flat with Henry and not to her parents…

Leo knocks once at the door of the mansion, located on the backlot of her childhood home. Her parents offered to build her and Henry a home there too, though she respectfully declined. It is easier somehow, to get lost in muggle London, somewhere their names mean nothing to anyone. “Grandma,” she calls. After finding the first floor empty. “Grandpa.”

“Up here,” Lucius replies, just loud enough to be heard.

Leo takes the stairs to meet him, following his voice to the upstairs parlor.

A copy of the Prophet lies crumpled on the floor, Lucius standing stoically, at the center of the room, glaring at the far wall. Their family tree. They’d torn the old one out of Malfoy Manor, when it became Draco and Rosanna’s. Refinished it to only include what is left of their family. Narcissa, Andromeda, Teddy. So on and so forth, until it reaches the bottom.

Leo’s eyes find her picture, the leaves that connect to her mother and father, extending in a line through each of her siblings. Arlo, Vega, Polaris, Scorpius, Corina.

However there is a new branch, stemming off in the opposite direction, Henry. She draws in a steadying breath. Lucius Malfoy has added a squib to his beloved wall.

“My father would beat me to death if he saw this.” Lucius sniffs, indignantly. “When Draco married your mother, I knew what I was meant to do. Burn his portrait from the family tree, erase any evidence that my son had ever existed. I could never bring myself to do it.”

Leo rests a hand on his back.

“But, your mother is on the wall. You and your siblings are on the wall…it’s only right that your husband should be too.”

“This wall is yours now.” Leo reminds him, softly. “Just because your father wouldn’t be proud of it doesn’t mean you can’t be.”

Lucius purses his lips, turning to the larger portrait behind him, which encased a much younger depiction of the Malfoy family. Only himself, Narcissa, Draco and a pregnant Rosanna. They chatter amongst themselves, within the frame.

“And what do you think?” He asks his daughter in law, calling Rosanna away from her perch on the chair.

Her eyes flicker about the Malfoy family tree, brushing a bit of hair behind her ears.

Leo never spent much time looking at this version of her mother. She was older than this Rosanna now, it turns her stomach. Her mother was so heartbreakingly young.

“It’s crooked.” The portrait says.

“Where?” Lucius demands.

Young Rosanna only smiles, “kidding.”

“Away with you,” Lucius waves a hand, “petulant thing.”

Rosanna returns to an anxious looking Draco, laughing softly about what she’d done.

He himself is far too young.

Leo chokes down her guilt. “Why do you keep it?” The portrait. “You have others.” Happier ones, with all of them smiling, carrying on.

Lucius lifts a shoulder, “penance.”

The word hits Leo dead in the chest, knocking the air from her lungs. She understands penance, perhaps better than anything else.

“I was supposed to keep them safe. They’re my children, and I couldn’t protect them. I still can’t.”

“It was me, you know. What you were trying to protect them from. I took away their freedom and sullied your beloved bloodline. It’s my fault.” Leo says, as if he needs reminding. “And I’ve carried that with me for all these years, without saying a word. Because I owe that to them, I owe that to all of you…to carry it. But it is so heavy, and I can never put it down.” She chokes over the words.

“You were never that, Leo. Not a burden or a cross to bear. You are the best of them.” Lucius passes a hand over her hair. “The best of us,” hair the color of his own, and that of his son. “I am so sorry for anything I’ve done to make you think otherwise.”

————————————————————————

“Who would do this?” Rosanna asks, pressing a hand to her temple. She can hardly think. Things have gone from bad to worse at the drop of a hat.

The assailant who stole information from the ministry used their collective absences to their advantage. While they were wrapped up in the Rabastan Lestrange debacle, their old case files had been ransacked. Worst of all, it has been determined that this attack was perpetrated by someone within the ministry itself.

“Someone who has it out for you.” Harry reasons.

“Someone always has it out for me.” Draco bites out, this is hardly news.

“Can anything be done for damage control?” Rosanna wonders.

“I’m afraid not…it was the entire case file.” Hermione gnaws at her bottom lip.

“What is it, Granger?” Draco demands, she knows something.

“There’s been a handful of petitions demanding that the ministry reopen your case.”

“We can disregard them if it’s just a handful, Hermione.” Harry reasons.

“It was more than a handful,” Rosanna confesses. She’d seen them, the pile of letters, some howlers. Hermione tried to quiet it, but she couldn’t anymore.

“If I ignore a public outcry of this magnitude, it will compromise my position as Minister for Magic. This has become a severe conflict of interest and I’m considering stepping down but I-”

“If you don’t try me, your successor will.” Draco says, with a shake of his head. “Draw up the papers and have me served.”

“Draco,” Rosanna reaches for him. “No.”

“It’s alright.” Draco soothes, taking her hand. “You can speak for me, like you did last time.”

Harry sees what he’s doing, providing Rosanna with a false sense of comfort. “I’ll speak too, as a character witness. Malfoy helped us defeat Voldemort at great personal expense.”

They would face this together. Come hell or high water.

Part 13