#to be at conferences and investigate things etc etc)

[stuckinapril]

I think there’s something to be said for the fact that I used to dread presentations when I was younger but now plan to go out of my way to sign myself up for them so I can improve my public speaking. Me from not even two years ago would’ve never. But now ?? The more the merrier let me at them

[moreaugriffins]

Me: it's late in the night and im really tired. i should sleep

-as soon as my head hits the pillow-

My brain: Wasn't there a calendar in the background in The Green Death? If so, what does the calendar show? Would it add to the Unit Dating Controversy? we must go check now!

[cosmicpuzzle]

5th Ruler and What you Love 💞

The 5th lord or 5th ruler shows what you love. This house is traditionally associated with sign of Leo and thus symbolizes your heart, what touches you most deeply.

The 5th ruler brings heartfelt joy, love, keeps you alive, inspired and refreshed by doing those house things it influences.

5th ruler in 1st : You love children, you love to express yourself through some art like dance, music, painting etc. You are likely to keep a youthful disposition throughout your life.

5th ruler in 2nd: You love money, the things it can buy, you love your family, you love food. You love being heard.

5th ruler in 3rd : You love sibling interactions, cousins, you love to do short trips with partner, you love writing, you love to read, you love playing games and sports.

5th ruler in 4th: You love your mother, family. You love spacious homes, cars, comforts, furniture. You love learning, education. You love gardening.

5th ruler in 5th: You love having fun, watching movies, sports, games. You are in love with love. You love attention, fame, politics, celebrities and fashion.

5th ruler in 6th: You love exercise, diets, nutrition, small pets, your uncles and relatives. You love to compete, so sports and adventure. You love working on your inspirations as well

5th ruler in 7th: You love to form relationships, you love your husband/wife, you love public and getting famous, you love foreign travels, bureaucrats, foreign relations, international politics, doing business and shopping.

5th ruler in 8th: You love crime novels, detective stories, crime movies, fiction books, occult, astrology, metaphysics, psychology, medicine, trauma healing, shamanism, reseach and investigation, complex mathematics.

5th ruler in 9th: You love long travels, foreign journeys, your father, attending ivy league universities, flight trips, religious ceremonies, weddings (where you can dress as per culture), foreign music and movies, grandparents, elders, you love commitments, philosophy and spirituality.

5th ruler in 10th: You love working on creative projects, you love status and authority, you love being known for your work, you love politics, power and ambition, you love your public image.

5th ruler in 11th: You love your friends, elder siblings, socializing, networking, attending conferences, seminars, you love joining groups, social organizations, social media, you love the stock market, gains, your father's siblings.

5th ruler in 12th: You love solitude, watching movies in your bed in dark, web series, you love making love, sex, you love imagining things, contemplating, spirituality, God, romance, past lives, music, and reading literature.

For Readings -DM

[queerasfact]

Hello! I'm a long time listener of the pod and big fan of the work you all do. Thank you for taking the time to be thorough and pay honor to the queer heroes before us!

Aside from kudos, I wanted to reach out with a possibly odd question: where do queer history nerds go to discuss all this badassary? Do you have a fanpage or fan meet ups? I feel like I'm the only one in my community looking for our stories, gobbling up all I can and trying to spread it through drag and speaking opportunities.

If you don't have an official space, do you have recommendations on how to find these people? You all found each other and share a passion, so I have hope!

Stay awesome. We and our future generations need these stories told, and not just in books. Books about our history are being banned around the US, so extending the availability of these stories to podcasts and blogs helps to protect them.

Respect, love and light, -Alex

Hello! Thanks for your message - I’m so glad you’re enjoying the podcast, and this is a great question!

At the moment, we don’t have a fanpage or meet-ups. If fans want to organise them, we’d have no complaints, but we don’t have the capacity to manage that kind of thing ourselves at the moment.

I have some other recommendations on where to find fellow queer history nerds, but they are a little location specific, and probably more appropriate to bigger and reasonably queer-friendly cities. I hope they help nonetheless:

Visit/volunteer at your local queer history archive, if one exists

If you don’t have a local queer archive, there may be some in other cities that offer online volunteering - for example, I did some transcription of oral histories from home for our queer archive. This could be a way to meet like-minded people even if you can’t get to them physically

We’re very lucky in Melbourne to have an annual queer history conference - you could investigate if there’s anything similar in your area, or any one-off history talks

Check out events at your local library - at least here in Australia, local libraries are often explicitly queer friendly and hold queer bookclubs, author talks etc. Local queer bookshops may also have similar things

I hope this helps! I don’t have any personal experience of living in a smaller town or somewhere not queer-friendly, but if any of our followers do, please offer your thoughts.

Keep up the good work!

Alice

[transkholins]

finished watching the acolyte with a friend. thoughts in no particular order:

really interested by the choice to continually refer to the stranger as "the stranger" (predominantly in subtitles) rather than giving him a name or even calling him "the sith." especially in the context of the jedi going to brendok as a scientific/exploratory mission. like they view the force + the universe writ large as something that they can investigate and define, but the stranger is fundamentally unknowable. the dark side and the sith exist outside of the limits of their knowledge.

relatedly: thinking about the scene in the phantom menace where qui-gon tells the jedi council that he thinks maul is a sith. like for one yoda says that the dark side is "hard to see." but also, the jedi pretty much refuse to accept that the sith could return, that they could be anything but eradicated, that the jedi order's knowledge is not absolute. one of the reasons that palpatine, dooku, and anakin are able to destroy the order is because the jedi continually refuse to believe that they could ever come back without them knowing. the clone army is able to be created because the jedi can't accept that the archives could be incomplete (or made incomplete). etc.

the point of the above is that the jedi order (and the republic writ large) is sowing the seeds of their own destruction. i don't think it's an accident that osha and the stranger were both trained by the jedi order - or even that dooku and anakin were, later down the line. the jedi and the republic unintentionally create the conditions that allow the sith and the empire to take control.

thinking about that scene where a senator comes to speak with vernestra and calls the jedi a cult, after we've seen the jedi constantly call the coven on brendok a cult. like the jedi have totally sold out to the republic, that's a point that stover makes in the rots novel, they're tools of the state. and that status confers them legitimacy and also a lot of power - even though individual actors in the republic can think they're weird/unethical/etc., the jedi can still enforce their hegemony over other spiritual practices in the gffa. they have the right to test potential padawans (and the caveat of "with consent" hardly seems to matter in the narrative).

jedi-republic politics are always kind of interesting to me. the jedi want the institutional backing of the republic to do things like test and take padawans, explore/catalog planets, wield power over spiritual practices unaffiliated with the republic and enforce hegemony, etc., but they don't want to be monitored or audited by the republic. they want to conduct their own business internally, and at every turn, it becomes obvious that they're increasingly corrupt. indara and sol can lie to the council and not be investigated. vernestra can lie about sol and the circumstances of his death to the senate and the chancellor, and she'll do it to avoid an external audit. much to consider.

i do appreciate the importance placed on osha's agency and ability to choose, even when she's a child. children are, legally speaking, wholly stripped of agency, even in the gffa - we see sol constantly being like, we need to test the girls, we need to bring them in, we need to train them. we see koril constantly encouraging mae to choose for osha. both koril and sol compress osha and mae into one entity, one person, they assume they know what's best for them. and so i really like how aniseya emphasizes letting osha choose for herself, trusting that osha knows what she wants and needs. and of course ultimately the jedi take that opportunity to choose away, but i think that makes it all the more relevant that osha chooses to leave the jedi order.

lots of comparisons and contrasts to be drawn between the coven on brendok and the master-padawan relationship. i think trying to decide if one or the other is morally better isn't useful, but ultimately, the jedi have the institutional power necessary to decide that the coven is Bad, that they're training mae and osha Incorrectly, while the coven cannot decide the same for the master-padawan relationship (which, in the show, ranges from genuinely caring to apathetic, but tends to alienate/exploit/indirectly kill padawans).

i'm not sure how much water this carries, but i think it was interesting that indara basically dismisses torbin's emotions and desires (wanting to return to coruscant) and then he turns around and disobeys her orders. he learns that she doesn't care about what he wants, so he learns to not care about what she wants. the jedi order continues to sow the seeds of its own destruction.

there are definitely things that sit poorly with me - the ending, mostly. i'm trying to articulate why but i suspect it's got something to do with osha and mae's characterizations (felt very different from how they're written in the rest of the show) and how sol's death was handled. like i'm fine with vernestra spinning a story because it reinforces the ideas the show is playing with vis a vis the jedi as an institution with power. but with his death itself, see above note about osha's characterization, and also i would like it if we could not kill off the only prominent east asian jedi after forty plus years of star wars being wildly orientalist at every possible opportunity. like having characters of color doesn't mean much if you're not going to treat their stories with care.

also i think we need to stop trying to do reylo. i think reylo was bad enough. we don't need to try and redo it. it's just not interesting and it does the characters involved a disservice. as stated above, i like it when osha has agency and gets to choose things, but historically joining the sith has been something coercive and abusive (see palpatine explicitly grooming anakin to be a sith in the prequels) and i don't think there's any way you can argue that osha was given a meaningful choice to join the stranger. just because the jedi order is corrupt and the jedi are tools of the state doesn't mean that the sith are necessarily a better or more empowering option, because morality isn't a zero-sum game. i think the most interesting reads of the jedi and sith are the ones that critique both. oh fucking well.

[forourtomorrows]

Hello people, let me introduce you to one AU I've been working on these past few months... Trucy Wright: Investigations

What if Trucy had her own Investigations spin-off ? Well, that was the thing I thought about, by making my own story !!

Summary: Trucy Wright, magician extraordinaire comes back home after multiple years on tour, but as she enters the office of the Wright Anything Agency, she discovers a note saying her father was abducted and a clue to find him ! Determined to uncover the truth behind what really happened to him, Trucy embarks on an adventure, and multiple investigations with familiar figures to bring her father back home !

The (made-up) game is set two years after aa6 and would be consisting of 4 cases, but first, here are the characters !

Profiles:

Story

Case 1: Welcome Home, My Turnabout

Trucy comes back from touring and Athena picks her up from the airport. As they go to the WAA, they find that a murder happened right outside the office while they were away !! With the help of Athena, they investigate the scene of the crime.

After they discovered who was behind this, they go inside the office to find out Phoenix disappeared with a note and a piece of cloth which appears to have khura'inese patterns. Trucy, with her emergency money, decides to book a plane for Khura'in.

Case 2: Turnabout Nostalgia (i had no better names)

Back to Khura'in ! Trucy meets up with Apollo who is busy with a case, so, for old time's sake, they investigate together ! The duo is also supported by the lovely comments of Rayfa who somehow is there.

After solving yet another case, Apollo with the help of Nahyuta find out that the pattern comes from a little community in London, so off to London we go ! Thanks to Apollo's money, Trucy books another plane for the UK !

Case 3: My Flying Turnabout

Quite a bad luck Trucy has ! Indeed as she enjoys her plane ride, a murder suddenly happens (three rows behind her to be exact). So, with the help of Aries, a french prosecutor, they investigate to figure out who decided to kill someone in the air ! As they investigate, Trucy finds a photograph with Aries on it, but decides to keep it with her..

After they land, Trucy meets up with Edgeworth (who was at a conference in London) who takes care of the murderer (having connections with Interpol does help), and they decide to take a rest as Trucy explains the situation.

Case 4: Turnabout Revelations

The day after arriving to London, Trucy receives a text from an unknown number with an address, telling her to go there, Edgeworth comes with her. The place is an abandonned storage area in which a recreation of a crime scene (ala Little Thief) is there for them to solve it. The murder is one of a young girl, who was harassed by a man who, at some point, decides to threaten her with a gun while she was with her brother. He harms her and her brother but during the fight, he drops his weapon and the brother catch it, and fires two time; only hitting the young girl. Trucy and Edgeworth both come to the conclusion that the culprit is the brother, but they are interrupted as someone comes in, telling them they're wrong ! And that person is Aries (please pretend to be shocked)

Aries was actually the one who ordered to abduct Phoenix, and was following Trucy from the moment she came home to here as a way to ensure she was looking for her father. Why ?

For Aries to take her as a hostage, so Phoenix could make a re-trial and catch the guy that, according to him killed the girl. As Edgeworth is kind of helpless in this situation, Aries calls Trucy a bunch of names, telling her she's nothing, etc (think of the meanest thing you could say to someone). But as his monologue goes on, he makes a slip-up that causes Trucy to react. By remembering all the details, evidence (the photo from the case 3 makes a comback !) and others she realise : Aries was the one who unintentionally killed his sister, her only family, before running off to France. Aries has a breakdown and Trucy, with the help of Edgeworth, manages to free herself from Aries' grip and also magically handcuffs him (don't ask. it's magic.). After some time, the police finds Phoenix and the family is reunited !! Happy end for everyone yay !!

Gameplay

For the gameplay, I thought about having the Perceive ability being brought back because she is a Gramarye, and also keep the Rebuttals because during her investigations, she is always with either a defense attorney or a prosecutor.

But I also wanted to add another gimmick, that I called Showtime: Trucy is a performer, thus, she knows how to handle misdirections, she knows how to make a crowd believe in something that isn't completely real. So, in her head, she considers the crime scenes as magic stages.

(here is an example of how it would look like)

So basically, Showtime allows her to put her inside the murderer's mind to discover things they might've hidden or illusions they might've created thanks to evidence she gathered.

Aaaaand that's all !! Thank you if you read all of that: this AU is really dear to me and I loved designing the characters and making up a story ! I might post some drafts of designs and stuff that didn't make it; but if you have any questions or suggestions I'd gladly answer them !

[zukadiary]

Takarazuka news: two additional follow-ups to the recent investigation report

Following a press conference held by the family of the recently deceased Takarazuka actress, and the company's release of their 3rd-party investigation report, some additional (positive!) updates have made the news:

Takarazuka Revue to survey all 400 actresses via interview, to probe into systematic issues of overwork, etc.

From Yomiuri. Translating select paragraphs that do not repeat already discussed information.

Following the death of a 25 year old member of Takarazuka Revue's Cosmos Troupe, the Revue is launching a fact-finding interview survey targeting all of the company's approx. 400 actresses, with the goal of investigating the problematic issue of systematically imposed excessive work policies, among other things—a company representative tells us. The Revue intends to establish an independent committee that includes outside experts before the end of the year. They intend announce a recurrence prevention strategy based upon the outcome of this study.

On November 14, the Revue published the results of an independent legal investigation conducted in response to the actress's death. The report identifies that based on the accumulation of her activities over an extended period of time, "the possibility that she suffered a severe psychological burden cannot be negated." Revue Chairman Koba Kenshi and other board members acknowledged responsibility and apologized for neglecting their duty to provide a safe and secure work environment, but also stated they were unable to confirm any accusations of bullying or power harassment by senior actresses.

The deceased's family criticized this stance, saying, "We cannot help but call out that [the company's] unquestioned approval of a trend that places excessive importance on hierarchical relationships, and refusal to recognize the actions of the senior actresses as power harassment, shows a thought process rooted in the values of a bygone generation." They are demanding a re-investigation.

Unlike the previous investigation, which focused on the circumstances and causes surrounding the actress's death, this next investigation aims to improve company culture as it relates to excessive work responsibilities and overly extreme leadership.

The Revue will proceed by expanding its interview process to members of the other four troupes—Flower, Moon, Snow, and Star—and will announce its recurrence prevention strategy only after the results have been audited by a third-party legal team.

------

Chairman of Takarazuka's Music School to step down

From Kyoto Shimbun

Following the death of a 25-year-old member of the Takarazuka Revue, Hankyu-Hanshin Holdings president Sumi Kazuo will be stepping down imminently from his position as board chairman of Takarazuka Revue's preparatory academy, Takarazuka Music School, an official source tells us. Newly instated Revue chairman Murakami Kouji is his planned to successor, taking the position as of December 1.

[n0v4t33z]

The Syndicate - Chapter 6 : Un-Killable

Pairings: Choi San X Female Reader, Park Seonghwa X Female Reader, Ateez X Female Reader

Genre: Lots of angst, Romance, Crime Fiction, Psychological Drama

Word Count: 5.8k

Tags/Warnings: For Mature Audiences, Language, Graphic Violence, Mentions of Illegal activities (i.e Kidnapping, extortion, assassination etc.), y/n gets roughed up by Wooyoung like twice , Slow Burn, Fluff sometimes, Work In Progress, Non-Idol AU, Mafia AU, Very suggestive at times, y/n cries alot, y/n having inner turmoil, Ateez being bad boys, Wooyoung and Yeosang are a little mean in this story tbh, Guns, Gunshot wounds, Assassination attempt(s), mentions death and acts of violence

MINORS DO NOT INTERACT!!

Spotify Playlist🎵 | Series Masterlist📝

Author's Note 💌: Hi, It's been about two weeks since I posted the last chapter so I'm here to keep my promise about posting at least twice every month! Unfortunately I didn't realize how short this chapter actually is. Either way it's a good one though, there are also some parts I may fix and add onto later since I'm posting this close to 2 am and I'm exhausted so I hope you guys still enjoy it either way! ^^

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆.

A whole 2 months passes by and I notice San has become somewhat distant and has been spending most of the time either in his office by himself or in the conference room with the rest of the guys. Although Seonghwa, Jongho, Yunho and Mingi still interact with me they become very vague anytime I ask them about San. There were a few occasions where I wanted to try and see what exactly they were talking about but because there's always a goon outside the door now keeping a lookout so I could never get close enough to hear. One day I asked Seonghwa why they spent so much time in the conference room and the only thing he told me is "We're sorting things out." As for me, this whole time after I ran the 3 people’s names in the police database and nothing came up I realized these people are basically ghosts with no paper trails on the database meaning I’ve been having to investigate on foot and tailing them. The only thing San left for me as a place of reference and a place to start was a club on the east side of the city which actually turned out to be a club named "Enigma" that they own under a fake identity but another thing San left on the note is that these 3 people are brothers who run an underground black market out of it. So far everything is fine with them, no meetings with any other rival groups. If anything, these brothers definitely know how to treat their allies by providing them with weapons and other resources that are otherwise considered inaccessible to which I'm assuming this is the reason San wants to work with them. Which leads me to where I am right now, heading home after a long couple of days of consecutively tailing and observing these people. What's been really weird is that San called me at least once everyday to check in on me in the beginning but it's been 2 weeks and nothing. I sigh while I look at the dark road ahead of me, taking in the scene of complete emptiness with a beautifully glittery night sky which left me feeling a bit emotional. I slowly begin to tighten my grip on the steering wheel. I’ve had so many chances to leave but why aren’t I taking them? Have I seriously grown attached?

I reach for my phone and very anxiously I glance at the screen while I keep my eyes on the road and look at my recent calls, the last time I called San was two days ago. I stare at his name on my screen for a few seconds and decide to just hit the call button. The ringing starts and by the 4th ring I'm sent to voicemail immediately making my heart sink. He didn't answer, again. My vision begins to blur the bright headlights and the road ahead of me slightly begins to distort until warm tears stream down my cheeks then I let out a small sigh “Why? What did you do to me?” Why do I have to make things more difficult for myself? The original plan was to have San trust me enough to let me leave his headquarters, but now that he's given me that permission I can't seem to leave. Why?

I try to compose myself and wipe my tears away with one hand while I keep my other hand on the steering wheel. In the distance I see the headquarters, and realize that most of the drive home I spent it worrying about him and questioning myself. When I arrive I walk inside headquarters I notice it seems empty, and by empty I mean too quiet. There's almost always someone in the building, whether it's Seonghwa drinking his tea in the lounge, Hongjoong on his computer in the server room, Wooyoung playing cards with Mingi, Yeosang and Yunho in the living room, even Jongho's occasional little breaks after he's been working all afternoon. So when I walk over to the lounge and notice it's completely empty my stomach feels like it flipped upside down. Where is everyone? I walk around the building and no one was there except of course the goons who keep watch on the building 24/7 now so I decide I'm going to just ask one of them as to why it's so empty because this is weird.

There’s a very tall and heavy build goon outside of San's office, he was so scary looking. Although his suit made him look a little less scary. "Um excuse me but where is everyone? Why is it so empty here?" Without flinching the man simply responds with "They're sorting out a few things they'll be back soon Miss y/n." I exhale then I run my fingers through my loosely curled hair "Okay yes, but where are they? What are they doing?" Keeping a straight face without even looking at me he responds "I'm sorry Miss y/n but that's all I know." I narrow my eyes in disbelief. Does he really think I’m that stupid? "That can't be, you have to know where they are. You were given orders by San not to tell me anything weren't you?" The man stands there looking straight ahead pretending he didn't hear me. I look at him for a few seconds more waiting if he'll say anything but he never does then I clench my jaw and say through my teeth "Fine, I'll take that as a yes." I scoff and walk away to my room, when I get there I throw myself onto my bed. I lay there in bed for a few minutes until I fall asleep.

A few hours later I hear commotion downstairs, it was San and the guys. ”I’m exhausted. Now all we need is to kill that old bastard.” Wooyoung comments. ”Well at least we’re done now, I thought it was going to take a lot longer to pull this off.” Hongjoong responds. I look over at the clock and it was around 4 am then I get up and hurriedly head downstairs and notice they’re all dressed in black like they were in a robbery of some sort. All the talking stops and becomes dead silent when everyone notices I’m in the room then Seonghwa walks towards me and nervously smiles “Hey, what are you doing here? Weren’t you on an errand?” I shrug with a straight face “I just got back a few hours ago, what about you guys? Why’s everyone dressed like this? Did I miss something?” San walks up to me and pats my back and smiles “Nothing, we just went to go handle something don’t worry about it.” I furrow my brows and look directly into San’s eyes “Let me guess you still went even after I told you not to…” San shakes his head and reassuringly pats my head “Didn’t we agree to forget about this? I said I wasn’t going to..” Seonghwa, MIngi, and Yunho look over at San with a very odd facial expression then Wooyoung says “You have your jobs and we have ours. San’s allowed to do what he wants it’s not like you’re his girlfriend.” I slowly nod and give Wooyoung and San a fake smile “Of course, you’re right. I was just wondering considering I've barely seen any of you at all I was just a bit worried.” Yeosang stares right at me with a deadpan face “Why do you even care? It’s not like we’re your friends.” Gosh, I know he’s right but wow that hurt. San's expression grows dark and Seonghwa puts his hand on Yeosang’s shoulder causing him to ease up a bit then I let out a frustrated sigh. Here we go again. “Well, maybe you might not be my friend but if you haven’t noticed there are other people I am friends with.” Wooyoung lets out a mocking laugh “Oh really? They’re your friends? If they were your friends they would have told you what was going on but clearly no one trusts you. You’ve only been here like what? 3 or 4 months and you already want to be let in on everything we do? Sounds just about right for an entitled cop.” San pushes Wooyoung and angrily says “Can you ever shut up?!” Yunho and Jongho rush over to separate them, Yunho holding San and Jongho holds Wooyoung respectively. As much as I’d love to be petty with Wooyoung and drop the bomb on San that his best friend thought it was a great idea to nearly kill me, I’ll keep that to myself. All in due time I guess. I don’t want to create anymore issues for these people. I bite the inside of my cheek trying to recover from that verbal jab. This is embarrassing, maybe Wooyoung is right they do have a right for not trusting me. Just because I gave them access to all these things doesn’t mean anything, for all they know I could be leading them to a trap so I don’t blame them for not trusting me. San angrily stares at Wooyoung "Oh come on San, calm down. I was just expressing everything in everyone's mind." Wooyoung fights back a smirk and San tries to reach over to him causing Yunho to tighten his grip on him.

"You don't speak for everyone here." Seonghwa speaks up looking directly at me reassuringly. Jongho speaks from behind Wooyoung "I agree with San and Seonghwa. You really don't speak for everyone here." Hongjoong sighs and nods "She's not so bad Wooyoung. You know this. You're just being hard headed and paranoid over this situation not to mention overtly territorial over San." Wooyoung lets out a laugh "Me paranoid?! Territorrial?! I know what these cops are capable of doing?! Did you guys forget what happened to San's father?! They easily get into your head and mess with it, they're master manipulators just like Lee. She's just like him and I'm only trying to protect him from things repeating themselves." There's a long silence, evreyone awkwardly looking at eachother. That's when I step in between San and Wooyoung causing evreyone's gaze to shift over to me. I slightly part my lips to speak but then a knot grows in my throat and press them shut. Maybe it's a good idea not to say anything right now and keep the peace. All this fighting isn't going to be worth it in the end. I can't change someone's mind whose already been made. Wooyoung can think anything he wants, I just don't want to hear it anymore. I turn my back to them and walk in the direction of my room.

In the distance I hear Yunho say “Come back just give her some time alone.” followed by fast paced footsteps until a few moments later I feel someone grab my wrist then I look back and it was San. He gently tugs my arm closer to him and I look down still slightly embarrassed for running off in a cowardly way. “y/n, wait… I’m sorry some of them haven’t warmed up to you but I promise it’s not your fault. I know you were just worried.” Beginning to feel drained I shake my head “I’m exhausted, we can talk tomorrow. Right now I just want to be alone.” San gently pushes back a few strands of hair “I understand, but please pay no attention to them especially Wooyoung. Nothing he says has an ounce of truth. I need you here with me, remember that.” I let go of San’s hand and walk towards my room leaving him behind me. When I walk into my room I lay there silently for a few moments until warm tears begin to sting my eyes. Once I get rid of Captain Lee I’m going to leave this place despite how deeply in love I am, or at least try to. I can’t keep putting myself through this.

The next morning while laying in bed I hear Wooyoung shouting in a panicked voice from outside in the hallway “San, they took down all security!” I sit up and quickly change clothes while listening closely to the commotion in the hallways, from what it sounds like someone took down the people guarding the HQ gates which is still kind of far considering we’re in the middle of nowhere. Suddenly San barges into my room with a slightly worried expression and says “y/n, the cops are on their way as we speak. Burn everything you can, everything on your computer wipe it and burn it too.” He hands me a gasoline can and some matches and pats my head “Everything will be okay I promise.” He smiles nervously and before he can walk away I pull on the sleeve of his rolled up dress shirt “Why are the cops coming? Is it because of what you guys were doing earlier today?” San’s smile disappears into a straight line and a serious expression then he runs his fingers through his hair “Please don’t get mad, I know you said you didn’t want me to follow through with breaking into the evidence room but I went ahead and did it anyway. I’m sorry. I genuinely thought everything went well I swear I made sure no one followed us but I guess I was wrong.”

I clench my free hand to the point my knuckles turn white. The silence between us lasted as a long instant, and while the anger welled up in my chest. He was looking at me with his gaze of expectation for me to simply forgive him and move on but as of right now I can’t. I won't. Instead it pisses me off because it seems like everything I tell him Is being ignored. Everything that’s happening right now was because of him but what do I expect from a criminal anyway? If anything I shouldn’t even be surprised, I should have known he was going to pull something like this. I raise my hand back and throw my hand forward as hard as I can, whipping it across his face. The crack of skin contacting skin echoed off the metal walls of my room. His face then turns back to me while he slowly runs his hand along his cheek and without another word I walk away. Part of me knows and is well aware I’m running away from my problems but at the moment I was more focused on escaping the police and wiping the computer of any evidence, I can’t get caught now. Nobody can find out I was kept alive.

I run into my work room and over to the computer and begin trying to reimage it to delete all the data on the hard drive then the screen shows a percentage bar and on the bottom of it read “Time Remaining: 35 minutes” I rub my forehead in frustration and grab the tower of the computer, toss it across the room a few times until it eventually splits open then I grab the can of gasoline and pour most of it on the motherboard and the hard drive. I pull out a match from the match box in my pocket and light it then flick it directly inside the computer case immediately igniting a huge fire. After burning a few papers and files I head down the hallway and I notice Yeosang looking out the window and calmly loading his gun while gazing into the distance then I realize he was looking at the various police cars, a helicopter and a few SWAT vehicles getting in position. Someone taps my shoulder and when I turn it was Mingi, he hands me a gun and says “Good luck” I nod taking the gun making sure there was ammo “Same to you.” Out of seemingly nowhere Yeosang begins to shoot causing me to slightly jump. San immediately runs out of his office with a gun in hand then he grabs my hand and leads me downstairs towards the back exit. “We’re going to head outside, there’s a secret escape route I built in the forest so I hope you have your walking shoes on because it’s going to be a long walk.” While he opens the door I say “Where’s everyone else?” He peaks outside and says “Mingi and Yeosang are going to buy us time. Everyone else is already in the forest.” Suddenly Wooyoung runs up behind us and pats San’s shoulder. “Everything is clear, lower associates were sent to distract the feds.” San nods and says “Did you turn on the self destruct device in the server room?” Wooyoung nods and smirks “Yep, everything is in order.” He steps outside in front of San and hides behind a car outside then motions us to follow behind him and just a few seconds after giving us the signal he motions us to stop and stay low. Then I hear a familiar voice.

“Let the girl go Choi San…” My stomach drops and I look up and see that In the helicopter was my partner Detective Chris and Captain Lee looking over his shoulder and right next to them was a sniper. I tightly squeeze his hand and San turns and looks at me “You’ll be okay, worst case is they’ll shoot me and not you.” Captain Lee speaks into the mega phone and says “Give it up son, you lost and it was all because you’re so reckless. You got so sloppy but don’t worry though I’ll clean the mess you left and I’ll start by shooting your little friend over here.” The red laser from the sniper’s gun points right at Wooyoung’s head “And then you.” Wooyoung looks at San and slightly nods and begins to run towards the forest. Almost instantly he gets shot in the chest instead from the sudden movement. His body falls limply on his side while he clutches onto his chest and struggles to breathe. My stomach drops and San lets out a scream calling out Wooyoung’s name with tears welling up in his eyes in anger “I’m going to kill you bastard!!” I clutch onto San's arm holding the gun in my other hand tightly with my eyes blurring with tears. Captain Lee smirks “You know what, I take it back. I won’t shoot you that’s letting you off easy...I want you to suffer by watching all your little mobster trash die.”

Seeing Wooyoung on the ground didn’t bring me satisfaction, instead I begin to cry at the sight of his breathing slowing down. Despite everything he’s done to me I couldn’t let San suffer again, as angry and pissed off as I am with him right now for putting us in this situation he doesn’t deserve to lose his bestfriend. Wooyoung needed help and fast but the only way to get him that help is if I turn myself in and somehow convince them to step back. I hate the idea that I won't have that anonymity anymore but this is a matter of life or death. If I can prevent someone from dying then I'm sure it'll be worth it no matter how painful it is. Suddenly, an idea pops up in my head, it was one I really didn't want to do but my only hope is that it all goes smoothly. I step in front of San with my back facing the helicopter which causes San to pull me closer to him into a hug. i gently press the barrel of the gun I have onto his stomach and he leans in close to my ear and whispers “What are you doing angel eyes? Whatever is going on in that little head of yours just stop, I don’t want you to get hurt. Please.” He sniffles burying his face in my hair trying to hide the fact that he was slightly teary eyed “Sannie, do you trust me?” He talks into my neck “Yes of course I trust you.” Staying still and keeping my voice calm I say “Keep your head down and shoot the sniper.” His voice goes an octave higher while keeping his head down buried into my neck and says “What?! Why?!” Keeping my calm I press the gun a little more onto his stomach “Do it. Shoot the sniper, trust me.” From the corner of my eye I see San’s arm go up and shoot in the sniper’s direction and as soon as he shoots I move just a bit to where the sniper’s bullet hits my right shoulder. I let out a scream in agonizing pain from the impact of the hot metal burning deep in my shoulder causes me to slightly jerk forward and drop the gun in my hand. I push San with the strength from the adrenaline coursing through my veins back into the building and I run towards the helicopter while I clutch onto my shoulder with tears in my eyes. This was all for nothing, so much for getting rid of this man from the shadows.

“There’s a bomb in there! Please Captain Lee, Chris we have to get out of here and remove everyone from the perimeter!” I look back and see San was no longer in the doorway, both Chris and Captain Lee look at me in awe then look at each other a few seconds. Eventually Chris lets down a ladder, helps me climb up and sit down. He sits next to me and looks over at Captain Lee “Captain, we have to take her to the hospital now!” I lay there growing more exhausted by the second due to blood loss until I manage to mutter “Captain, remove everyone from this perimeter now or we’re all going to die.” Chris looks at me and shakes his head while he keeps pressure on my wound “No, we can’t. We have a warrant for San’s arrest we can’t just let him escape” I grab Chris’s forearm and squeeze it from the pain and slight impatience “Trust me, I know he’s going to fuck up again this won’t be the last time. The bomb, please. We have to get out of here we don’t have much time left..” Chris turns to Captain Lee giving him a worried look then Captain Lee looks down at the building for a few moments that felt like an eternity and eventually looks over at me and Chris “Alright, but only because I trust Detective y/ln and know she’ll be able to catch this scum again.” He looks over at the pilot and says “Take us to the nearest hospital please.”

He speaks into his radio “We’ve got a code 4, change of plans, we found Detective y/n y/ln alive and well. Clear the area, over.” Is he really going to act like he didn’t leave me for dead? Is this a favor that later on he’s going to try to use as leverage to somehow blackmail me? A voice answers back on the radio “Disregarding, all units will return back to the station. Over.” I did it, but this was too easy… Luckily the server room self distructing came in handy so technically I wasn’t lying. Chri’s voice interrupts my thoughts and says “So you’re alive? I’m so glad you’re okay but how? I saw your dead body, how is that possible?” I struggle to breathe then I sit there focusing on my breaths until Captain Lee sits next to the seat where Chris and I were sitting and says “Detective Bang stop asking her questions, can’t you see she has a bullet inside her?” Chris’s voice slightly shakes a bit and says “I’m sorry sir, I’m just in shock she’s alive. I saw her charred body, her police badge, everything." I feel my eyes slowly begin to close, my consciousness felt like it was slipping away until everything goes dark.

When I wake up, I scan the room and realize I'm at the hospital. That’s when it all comes back to me, I hope San is okay and he managed to escape along with everyone else. Especially Wooyoung, I really hope he made it as well. I turn and notice Chris is asleep then In a low whisper I say “Chris?” Immediately I see Chris sit up and say “Oh hey y/ln you’re up, how are you feeling?” I nod my head slightly and look down at the IV needle in my hand while he proceeds to talk “I’m so glad it wasn't anything serious, I waited for you to wake up and ask if you wanted to see your family. I’m sure you miss them. I didn’t call them right away since I didn’t want you to be overwhelmed.” I shake my head and I say in a low voice “Don’t tell them I’m alive... Please.” Chris furrows his brows and gives me an odd look “Why not?” I stare off into the distance trying not to make eye contact with him “Promise me you won’t tell anyone especially Captain Lee.”

Chris leans in close to me then I lean in a bit more and whisper “I’m going to run away. I think it’s best for me to disappear considering AS is going after me and I don’t want my family to get killed.” I still can’t believe I’m lying through my teeth, who am I trying to save? San or me? Maybe both. Chris responds in a worried tone “It’s okay we can get you into the Witness Protection Program., you can get your life back.” I sigh and shake my head “No Chris, I’m doing this without the help of the government or the police.” Chris’s jaw tenses up and sits there looking at the ground for a few seconds. “Please, don’t tell anyone Chris. Promise me. You also have to make sure Captain Lee doesn’t release the news of me being alive to the media as this is going to make it even harder for me.” He lifts his gaze and meets my eyes and smiles “Of course I promise, we’re partners after all. We’re under oath to protect one another but promise, you’ll reach out to me occasionally. I just want to make sure you’re alive and well.” I nod then I sit up “Of course as long as you keep my existence a secret, but I do have one more thing to tell you and this one is much more serious because it’s about Captain Lee.” I hope he doesn’t tell him, but who else can I trust? Besides having someone to lean on he might be of help. He scrunches his face in curiosity then looks at the door “What about him? Is it something bad?” I bite the inside of my lip then I take a deep breath and blurt out “Captain Lee works for The Obsidian Dragon, Aurora Syndicate’s rival. I know this because I saw a whole file documenting him being associated with the mafia with pictures and everything.” Chris smirks holding in a small laugh “What? Are you sure that’s not the morphine talking? Why would he even work for the mafia to begin with?” Oh no, he’s asking questions. “He was a close friend of the Choi family, specifically The Phantom. He’s the reason that the whole shootout happened, he sold The Phantom’s location in exchange for money.” Chris’ hand reaches up to his mouth then says “Wait what? So he knew who was behind all of that? No wonder he would always breathe down our necks and constantly check the leads. How much was he given?” I tap my finger on my chin “50 grand if I remember correctly.” He blinks in shock then says “Okay wow that’s quite a bit of money. Yeah, I get why you’re in a hurry to hide. You know too much.” And I know so much more but I can’t tell you the rest.

“Yep..” There was a long silence but Chris clears his throat and says “So uh I have a question and it’s kind of random...Why was San holding you like that?” I raise my eyebrow “How so? What do you mean?” He rests his cheek on his hand “You know like weirdly close, like he had a thing for you. His hand around your waist.” I shrug and look out the window “I don’t know, maybe because he thought of me as an object more than a person. His meat shield.” Hopefully by telling him everything he wants to hear it’ll help me get him off my back, even if those said answers aren’t how I truly feel at all. He can’t find out I’m protecting San. From the corner of my eye I see Chris’s eyes move from looking at the door back to me “Did he ever do anything to you?” While looking out the window I run my finger along the IV tube “I don’t know I was drugged the majority of the time I was there, I can’t remember anything.” Chris puts his head down and rubs his forehead while gently tapping his foot on the floor “I swear to god y/n if he did anything to you…” I shake my head “Nah, despite how scary he is he never put his hands on me.” He raises an eyebrow “How do you know? You were drugged the whole time..” I look down at the dusty pink blanket on my body “Because he was the one who would make the beatings stop, besides I’m sure if he did anything to me my body would remember it. Instead I just remember that evreytime I was being beat he’d scold the person doing it.” That feeling, that pit in my stomach. My eyes well up with tears and Chris reaches for my hand “I’m sorry, I can’t talk about this. Just remembering it brings it all back” Chris nods giving me a reassuring hand squeeze “I’m sorry, we don’t have to talk about it anymore. You should rest, we'll talk about it later when you feel better.” He adjusts my pillow slightly so that I'm able to lay back a little bit again. "Thanks Chris, you should nap too. You look exhausted." He gives me a weak smile "I should be watching you. It's okay." I shake my head "I insist, it's kind of weird knowing you're just watching me sleep. A nap will most definitely not hurt you." He looks into the distance and slowly nods his head almost like he was thinking whether or not he should do it "Alright, if that makes you comfortable y/ln, just know if I hear the door open I will wake up.." I chuckle nervously "Yeah, I know" I hope he falls into a deep sleep otherwise I'm screwed.

A few hours later I wait until Chris is fast asleep in his seat then I begin taking the tubes and IV’s off of me and I put on my pants and shoes making sure I also take the phone San gave me. I look over and glance over at chris to make sure he was still asleep then I carefully open the door wide enough for me to slip out the hospital. Luckily because of the lack of use my phone still had battery so I enter a gas station restroom near the hospital and call San. I anxiously hold the phone to my ear while it rang a few times then on the other line San answers the phone and excitedly I say “San?!” In a surprised tone he answers “y/n?! Where are you? Are you okay?” Relieved to hear his voice again I say in a slight hushed tone “I’m at the gas station bathroom a few blocks from the hospital, I escaped but um what about Wooyoung, is he okay?” I anxiously brush my index finger over the smooth surface of the back of the phone while I wait for him to answer. “He’s fine now angel eyes. He got a pierced lung but he’ll be okay don’t worry.” I let out a sigh of relief and smile “I’m glad he’s okay. I’m glad your best friend is still here with you.” He exhales a bit before he admiringly says “He wouldn’t have been saved if it wasn’t for you and your quick thinking, I don’t know how you did it but I’m so thankful.” There’s a long silence then he continues “ Do you want me to send someone to pick you up?” Immediately I respond “Yes please, I want to get out of here before anyone notices I’m gone” San answers me reassuringly “Don’t worry I’ll send your location to the nearest Associate just hang tight okay? Their code word will be “snow”, I’ll see you in a bit angel eyes I love you.” I gently bite my lip " I love you too. Sannie” I hear San chuckle on the other side of the line and immediately after the line goes dead. I turn and see myself in the mirror and realize I was wearing my ugly hospital gown so I decide to turn it inside out and make a makeshift tie up shirt out of it.. After I finish I sit on the counter of the bathroom and not even 10 minutes later there’s a knock at the door. I stay silent until a deep voice says “Snow.” I jump off the counter and run to open the door and see an average build man with a buzz cut and tattoos and a dark blue track suit “y/n ?” I nod then he motions me to walk behind him and says “Come on, the boss asked me to take you where they’re in hiding.” I nod and follow him into a black average looking car with dark tinted windows, his car reeked of cigarettes and the seats were pretty worn out, a nice way to blend in. Smart.

After 2 hours of driving we arrive at a parking lot at an undisclosed area since I couldn't tell where exactly we were because of how dark it was, all I know it was far away from both Ulwood and Lulens but unlike the HQ last time this location was in a city. I get out of the car and follow the heavily tattooed man into a weird tattoo shop, the buzzing of the tattoo gun was the very first thing I hear when I enter. Everyone in there (which wasn’t alot) seemed to either not notice or not to care kind of like it was a regular occurrence here. So when we make it to the back I notice a black metal door with a key pad, and as soon as he punches in the code the door clicks open and he motions me to walk inside then closes the door behind me. Which reminds me of this tough pill to swallow, I am once again under San's mercy by coming back..

‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆. ✧˚₊‧⋆‧‧⋆ ✧˚₊‧⋆.

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[plague-of-insomnia]

Vatican Miracle Examiner Vocab: Chapter 1

100+ vocab terms from Ch 1, Vol 1 of the 5-part manga series.

Mostly Catholic terms in Japanese and unique usage related to the series.

This list is not exhaustive. I focused on terms that would be unfamiliar (or unfamiliar as used in this series), and/or directly relate to Catholic terminology in Japanese.

I list part of speech, pronunciation, and simple definitions. I have not included additional of these if they are not relevant to this series.

Character names will have titles where applicable and those will be in brackets to minimize confusion; titles will be listed under general vocab as well.

At the end of the list I’ll have a few sources for some of the more obscure terms in case you want to read more or get better context.

As of now I have things listed in the order in which they appear, roughly, in the manga.

Note: This will be a long post since it’s the first chapter in the series and 31 pages long.

~#~

Character Names/Places

Note: I’ve chosen to spell names close to the katakana spellings; keep in mind some may be transcribed with slightly different spellings (like Joseph instead of Josef).

平賀•ヨゼフ•庚 [神父] - Hiraga, Josef Kou [Father], Franciscan order

ロベルト•ニコラス[神父] - Roberto, Nicholas [Father], Franciscan order

良太 - Ryota (Josef’s younger brother)

サウロ[大司教] - Saul [Archbishop] , Franciscan order

ニコラス[枢機卿] - Nicholas [Cardinal], secretary of the Dicastery for the Causes of the Saints (also potentially the head of the miracle examiners), also known as “the prefect (of the Curia)” in English

ドンナ•ドロレス - Donna Dolores, a nun from St Rosario Church

[大天使]ミカエル - [Archangel] Michael

[聖]ペテ - [Saint] Peter

パウロ[大司教] - [Archbishop] Paul, Dominican order

アントニウス[神父] - [Father] Antonius

セントロザリオ教会 - St Rosario Church, a church in South America where Josef & Roberto are sent to investigate

バチカソ市国 - Vatican City, the City state of the Vatican

Other Vocab

奇跡、きせき (n; の adj) miracle

常識、じょうしき (n) common sense, common knowledge, common practice

科学、かがく (n) science

説明、せつめい (n, する v; trans v) explanation, account, caption, legend, description

不可思議、ふかしぎ (な adj; n; yojijukugo) mystery, miracle, something inexplicable, unfathomable

現象、げんしょう (n) phenomenon

神、かみ (n) God, divinity

御業、みわざ (n) the works (of the gods)

真偽、しんぎ (n) veracity, authenticity

確かめる、たしかめる (Ichidan v; trans v) to ascertain, to check, to make sure

神父、しんぷ (n) Catholic priest [Note: this is the term used when speaking to someone , like “Father” So-and-So, as opposed to a general word for priest, 司祭, which you don’t use when speaking TO someone but rather about them.]

害、がい (n) evil influence

礼服、れいふく (n) cassock, vestments, etc

暗号、あんごう (n; のadj) code, cipher, password

解読、かいどく (n; するv; trans v) deciphering, decoding

聖年、せいねん (n) holy year, jubilee [see additional notes below]

大聖年、だいせいねん (n) the Great Jubilee (of 2000)

聖堂、せいどう (n) church

バチカン (n) (the) Vatican

市国、しこく (n) city state (as in the Vatican)

宗教、しゅつきょう (n) religion, faith

ブラザー(n) brother (as in, a monk or priest)

天使、てんし (n;のadj) Angel

悪魔、あくま (n) devil, demon, the Devil (Satan)

骨肉腫、こつにくしゅ (n) osteosarcoma

治療費、ちりょうひ (n) cost of medical treatment

ルルドの泉、いすみ (n) Fountain of Lourdes, aka home of “Lourdes Water” in France

奇跡調査官、きせきちょうさかん (n) miracle examiner

調査、ちょうさ (n; するv; trans v) investigation, examination

聖痕現象、スティグマータ (n) stigmata (phenomenon)

未知、みち (のadj; n) the unknown

知れる、しれる (ichidan v; intrans v) to become known; to be discovered; to be known; to be understood

舞い込む、まいこむ (godan v む ending; intrans v) to happen unexpectedly

大司教、だいしきょう (n) archbishop

キリスト (n) (Jesus) Christ

聖書、せいしょ (n) Bible, scriptures, holy writ

黙示録、もくしろく (n) book of revelation; the apocalypse

悪魔が書いた魔法書 - literally, “magic writing written by the devil” [see additional notes below]

古文書、こもんじょ (n) historical document, ancient manuscripts

断片、だんぺん (n) fragment

���む、よむ (godan v, む ending; trans v) to decipher, to read, to recite (a sutra, prayer)

原文、げんぶん (n) original text

会、かい (n; n suffix) meeting, assembly, conference, clerical order

イエズス会 (n) society of Jesus, aka Jesuit order

ドミニコ会 (n) Dominican order

フランシスコ会 (n) Franciscan order (which Josef and Roberto belong to)

派閥 (n; のadj) faction; used in the manga as in orders of priests

破門、はもん (n; するv; のadj) excommunication

枢機卿、すうききょう (n) Cardinal (title)

執行部、しっこうぶ (n) leadership (for example, the Roman Curia, that is the administration of the Vatican)

列聖、れっせい (n; するv) canonization (of a Saint)

列聖省長官、れっせいしょうちょうかん (n) literally, “canonization ministry secretary”; I believe this is intended to refer to the Secretary/Director of the Dicastery of the Causes of Saints; a position in the Vatican overseeing things related to canonization [see additional notes]

祈り、いのり (n) prayer

申請書、しんせいしょ(n) Written application

申請、 しんせい (n; する v; trans v) application, petition, request

教会、しょうかい (n) church, congregation

修道女、しゅうどうじょ (n) nun

大天使、だいてんし (n) archangel

神の子、かみのこ (n) son of God (Jesus Christ); child of God (Christian)

処女懐胎、しょじょかいたい (n) virgin birth, such as Mary with Jesus (immaculate conception)

受胎、じゅたい (n; するv; intrans v) conception

聖母、せいぼ (n) Virgin Mary; holy mother

カソリック (n) Catholic, Catholicism, Catholic Church [note there are a couple diff katakana spellings of this word, but this one is used in VME]

受肉、じゅにく(n) (Christ’s) incarnation (as Jesus of Nazareth)

降臨、こうりん (n; するv) descent to earth (of a god); advent; epiphany

罪、つみ (n; なadj; のadj) sin

永遠、えいえん (n; なadj) eternity; immortality

贖う、あがなう (godan v, う ending; trans v) to atone for

最後の審判、さいごのしんぱん (n) judgment day; final judgment (religious sense)

聖、せい (n) Saint (may also be written with katakana, as in 「セント」, like “St Rosario’s Church”

ローム (n) Rome

司教、しきょう (n) bishop (catholic)

代理人、だいりにん (n) proxy, representative

存在意義、ぞんざいいぎ (n) raison d'être, reason for existing

冒涜、ぼうとく (n; するv) blasphemy, sacrilege, desecration

主、しゅ (n) the Lord (God)

カルト (n) cult

教徒、しょうと (n) believer, adherent

法王、ほうおう (n) Pope; aka ローム法王

司祭、しさい (n; のadj) a priest [do not confuse with 神父, the title of “Father”]

大罪、たいざい、(n) mortal sin, grave sin

契��、けいやく (n; するv; trans v) covenant, contract, pact [as in a deal with the devil]

最高責任者、さいこうせきにんしゃ (n) chief executive [such as, of the Vatican Bank]

教皇庁、きょうこうちょう(n) the Curia, the administration of the Vatican

地位、ちい (n) position, such as within the Vatican hierarchy, or in line to be a papal candidate

潜り込む、 もぐりこみ (Godan v, む ending; intrans v) to go undercover, to infiltrate

マリア (n) (the Virgin) Mary [sometimes seen as 聖母マリア]

聖母子 (n) Virgin and Child, Mary & Baby Jesus

全知全能、ぜんちぜんのう (n; のadj; yojijukugo) omnipotence and omniscient, all powerful and all knowing

救世主、きゅうせいしゅ (n) savior, the messiah, Jesus Christ (the messiah, savior)

背徳、はいとく (n) immorality, corruption, lapse of virtue

堕落、だらく (n; するv) depravity, degradation, corruption

偶像、ぐうぞう (n) idol, image, statue

天罰、てんぼつ (n) divine punishment, wrath of God, judgment of heaven

主よ、しゅよ (なadj; n) Lord, head (of a group)

信仰、しんこう (n;するv; trans v) (religious) faith, belief

印、しるし (n) a sign

聖所、せいじゅ (n) sanctuary, inner sanctum

邪悪、じゃあく (なadj;n) wicked, evil

~#~

Additional Notes

Holy year, 聖年 ; Great Jubilee, 大聖年

“Devil’s book,” 悪魔が書いた魔法書

I did a lot of searching trying to figure out what book, specifically, was meant here, and came up with 2 possibilities:

the Gigas Codex, ギガス写本 or 悪魔の聖書, a book that is not held by the Vatican but was supposedly written with magical assistance from Satan himself;

the Grand Grimoire, 大奥義書 or 大いなる教書, not written by Satan but that is held by the Vatican.

It’s possibly intended to be vague, but the exact phrasing here is different than used for either of these actual books and I couldn’t find any other possible real option. Note the anime does call a book “the devil’s book” and describe it as a “Bible written by the devil” but it doesn’t seem to really be a reference to Gigas, so maybe it’s intended to be a fictional book inspired by these real texts for the purposes of the story.

Secretary of Dicastery of the Causes of Saints - 列聖省長官

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Dicastery_for_the_Causes_of_Saints

~#~

As always, I’m human and make mistakes. If you find anything feel free to let me know.

[thepatchycat]

hellooo! 👋

i hope it as okay to tag you in the WIP game!!! 😅😅 you have so many cool projects underway!!

I would love to hear more about your Defiance series! Side stories and spin offs?! What a world you must be creating! 🤩

thanks and have a lovely day !!☀️

Certainly! :D I don't always respond to tag games, but I do always appreciate being tagged in them. This one especially makes for a nice excuse to ramble about projects, and I'm delighted to talk about Defiance~

I'm pretty sure Defiance (the main fic) is the second fanfiction I've ever worked on in earnest and also my first and only longfic (not counting some sort of journal thing for Pokemon X I think I started many years ago, as I quickly lost interest in that project; otherwise, I hadn't really tried my hand at writing fic until 2020, despite reading it for much longer). Back in early 2021, with far too much time on my hands and having recently finished binge-watching all of The Clone Wars TV show, I felt very strongly that Fives needed to live and everyone deserved a happier ending, so I started planning a fix-it (actually the idea may have begun cooking back even before I finished the show, but February 2021 is apparently when I created the first doc).

It, uh, spiraled a little.

The planning/notes document is currently sitting at 102 pages (~46k words) of loose outline, worldbuilding notes, character notes, media notes, etc. The fic document itself is at 127 pages (~49k words) of stuff ranging from rough outline to fully written chapters and outtakes. There is also a Sheets file with timelines so I can track who is where, and when. The Sidestories doc is for ideas that would probably take place during Defiance but not be part of the more central plot, like bonus side chapters, and the Spin-offs doc is for other fic ideas that would take place in the same universe—some of which have graduated to their own documents. Though I've not been making consistent progress in the actual writing and have a very long way to go, I am lost in this sauce.

Anyway, the general plot of Defiance is as follows: unbeknownst to Palpatine and the general public, a timely intervention saves Fives' life. This allows him to actually explain himself to the Jedi, who along with the clones investigate the chips further and work behind the scenes to prevent Order 66 from happening while trying to figure out how to take down who's behind it. Critically, despite their suspicions they do not have hard evidence of Palpatine's involvement, so most events parallel canon up through ROTS with the investigation/preparation taking place discreetly, until the train hops off the rails to avoid sailing off the cliff.

If you'd like a sneak peak snippet, here's the first page or so of the main fic below the cut!

Something is wrong. The Force is muddled with a constant and indistinct unease, as it has been for years now—moreso on Coruscant than anywhere else, to Shaak Ti's perceptions. Its warnings are difficult to discern with any specificity. Even so, it murmurs them now. And Shaak possesses her own instincts, enhanced by the Force but extant outside her connection to it; these, too, whisper to her that something is wrong, as she watches Knight Skywalker leave the Jedi Temple conference room to find Captain Rex and investigate the situation with Fives. They are the best fit to track him down and the most likely to confront the rogue clone without further violence. Shaak warned Skywalker that Fives has been acting differently without his chip, that he may not be the man they knew—though she herself is reluctant to believe it—and the Knight and Captain are plenty capable of handling themselves. They will be all right. Still, something is wrong in a way she cannot yet define, and so Shaak Ti decides to join the hunt. Since the Jedi have not been asked to search for Fives, she does not contact the Coruscant Guard when she leaves the Temple. Instead she steps out of the building, pulls up the hood of her cloak, and makes for one of the speeder bikes kept at the Temple for general use. It whirs to life under her hands, and she rides to the nearest transportation portal leading down into the undercity. As she descends, passing speeders of all makes and sizes, Shaak Ti considers what she knows. She is well aware of her own struggles in becoming emotionally attached to the clones; her role on Kamino requires her to balance her care for them as people with the need to defend the galaxy. But many of them, such as Domino Squad, inevitably leave an impression. She watched Echo and Fives grow from bickering cadets to determined protectors, some of the best of their brothers. Her belief in their character during their final tests had not been misplaced. And yet, over these past few days Fives repeatedly defied the Kaminoan doctors, removed his chip, claimed something about a conspiracy, then attacked the Chancellor and fled. Shaak cannot deny these facts, and she must not allow personal feelings to cloud the truth. Then there are the Kaminoans. Shaak clashes frequently with their attitudes toward the clones, the way they view them as products rather than sentients. Nala Se’s arguments for terminating Tup and assurance that the chips are not a problem fall in line with her position as a manufacturer. And Shaak is well aware that the Kaminoans have not shared all of their secrets with her, as she is not owed them. But the medical scientist's resistance had been… spirited. None of this paints a clear picture. As they concluded in the meeting back at the Temple, the Jedi need more information. The familiar sound of a military engine hums past, and Shaak turns her head to watch a pair of gunships heading down the portal through one of the military lanes. She swerves out of the civilian traffic and dives after them, further and further below the surface of the city.

[cosmicpuzzle]

5th Ruler and What you Love 💞

The 5th lord or 5th ruler shows what you love. This house is traditionally associated with sign of Leo and thus symbolizes your heart, what touches you most deeply.

The 5th ruler brings heartfelt joy, love, keeps you alive, inspired and refreshed by doing those house things it influences.

5th ruler in 1st : You love children, you love to express yourself through some art like dance, music, painting etc. You are likely to keep a youthful disposition throughout your life.

5th ruler in 2nd: You love money, the things it can buy, you love your family, you love food. You love being heard.

5th ruler in 3rd : You love sibling interactions, cousins, you love to do short trips with partner, you love writing, you love to read, you love playing games and sports.

5th ruler in 4th: You love your mother, family. You love spacious homes, cars, comforts, furniture. You love learning, education. You love gardening.

5th ruler in 5th: You love having fun, watching movies, sports, games. You are in love with love. You love attention, fame, politics, celebrities and fashion.

5th ruler in 6th: You love exercise, diets, nutrition, small pets, your uncles and relatives. You love to compete, so sports and adventure. You love working on your inspirations as well

5th ruler in 7th: You love to form relationships, you love your husband/wife, you love public and getting famous, you love foreign travels, bureaucrats, foreign relations, international politics, doing business and shopping.

5th ruler in 8th: You love crime novels, detective stories, crime movies, fiction books, occult, astrology, metaphysics, psychology, medicine, trauma healing, shamanism, reseach and investigation, complex mathematics.

5th ruler in 9th: You love long travels, foreign journeys, your father, attending ivy league universities, flight trips, religious ceremonies, weddings (where you can dress as per culture), foreign music and movies, grandparents, elders, you love commitments, philosophy and spirituality.

5th ruler in 10th: You love working on creative projects, you love status and authority, you love being known for your work, you love politics, power and ambition, you love your public image.

5th ruler in 11th: You love your friends, elder siblings, socializing, networking, attending conferences, seminars, you love joining groups, social organizations, social media, you love the stock market, gains, your father's siblings.

5th ruler in 12th: You love solitude, watching movies in your bed in dark, web series, you love making love, sex, you love imagining things, contemplating, spirituality, God, romance, past lives, music, and reading literature.

For Readings -DM

[commonwealthoccurences]

Back To Eden - Ch 2

Summary: Sole is a journalist and independent investigator who worked with the famous Detective Nick Valentine before the bombs dropped. They stumble out of Vault 111 with hazy memories of a case gone awry, a sense of desperate yearning, and the bitter experience of already having had to fight for their life to survive against the odds. What's a little nuclear wasteland to a (newly) seasoned investigator?

See masterlist for warnings.

Fic-long tags: Hurt comfort, angst, pining, flashback scenes, noir detective show meets post-apocalyptic chaos, Preston Garvey is a sweetheart, Sole is doing their best and living out of pure spite, slow burn (Nick/Sole), etc etc.

Back To Eden Masterlist

On the walk to the first victim’s family's house, Detective Valentine and Sole quietly went over their notes separately, other than an occasional murmur to confer about details. 

The serial killer they were tracking had an obsession with Halloween and had sent a series of notes to the BPD promising that he would be leading up to the big day and it would be “well worth the wait.” Unfortunately for the BPD, it was still the beginning of September, so that meant plenty of time for their mystery killer to go after people and they had made little progress since he had started killing in August, having already claimed four victims.

It was clear the guy loved attention, so they’d been asking the media to keep quiet about it, but when five different people drop dead in the same way in Boston and your head Detective has the reputation he has? Well, word gets out. Sole did feel a little bad for Detective Valentine; between Eddie Winter and their mystery killer, he was going through quite the media ringer. They didn’t acknowledge that they would’ve been part of that media ringer if they weren’t working with him.

The first interview was with Jess Hardy’s parents. She was the first victim. They trashed their disposable cups and quickly ascended the few stairs that led to the Hardy family home. Detective Valentine gave no pause before he knocked at the door. Usually, when they worked on their own, Sole gave themself a minute or two to catch their breath and go over the details of the case in their mind. What to say, what not to say, the questions that were off-limits and the little details that made the family feel cared for, things like that. However, it seemed that once one spent enough time building up their reputation like Detective Valentine had, there was no need to give pause. He was ready no matter what.

Sole took a deep breath and braced themself and Detective Valentine spared them no glance. Shoulders squared, and a soft but not overdone smile. They all knew what they were there for, this was not a smiling situation, but Sole hated the grimness of these interviews. They hated the way that everything about these people was turned into the way they died and not who they were and what they loved. They wished there was a way they could convey all of that in an expression, but there wasn’t, and so they opted for a warm, and hopefully reassuring, smile.

Detective Valentine didn’t seem to share the same concerns. His expression wasn’t flat, but it wasn’t whatever Sole was attempting. His eyes were warm, Sole noticed. Silently, they noted their approval, and squared their shoulders as they heard footsteps behind the door.

It opened a little at first, and then all the way when the woman locked eyes with Sole. The door swung open and, to both their surprise and the surprise of Detective Valentine, the woman flung her arms around Sole’s neck. “Thank God you’re here.”

Finally, Sole and Detective Valentine made eye contact over her shoulder. They couldn’t quite read the expression on his face, but they knew it wasn’t one of approval. Sole returned the hug with a gentle pat on the back. “Hello, Mrs. Hardy.”

The woman pulled away and gave a wry smile. “Oh, it’s Miss Hardy now.”

“Ah, I understand. Apologies.”

“Don’t worry about it.” She turned to give Detective Valentine a once over, though it seemed a bit dismissive. “Detective.”

“Miss Hardy. I’m sorry we have to meet again.”

“As am I. Come in.”

Miss Hardy’s house was a bit tidier than the last time Sole had visited; they had conducted an initial round of investigations after the first two victims had died in an attempt to get ahead of the killer before he could get the reputation he so strongly desired. The one advantage (or disadvantage, depending on the person) Sole had was when the police failed to do their jobs, families often saw Sole as a hopeful alternative. The backup plan.

The house had been a disaster when Sole first visited. It looked like a stranger had ransacked it, but it had been no stranger. Mr. Hardy had torn the house apart looking for some sort of answer. In what form, Sole wasn’t sure. Maybe some clue as to why Jess Hardy had died so unfortunately; she was a college student who had simply been at the wrong place at the wrong time around the wrong man. Unfortunately, with these cases, there was no explanation for why the parents had to lose their child so young, and this often created extra issues with the parents finding closure. However, it had only been a month since Jess Hardy was found, and this was no time to think about closure. There were answers to be found.

“They’re still cold, I’m not sure if we’re gonna be able to get their temperature up.”

“We have to try.”

“Don’t worry, I wasn’t plannin’ on givin’ up anytime soon.”

“You didn’t tell me you knew the victim’s family already.”

“You didn’t ask.”

Detective Valentine raised an eyebrow. Sole sighed. “I did some interviews of my own after the second victim.”

“Right.”

There was an unspoken acknowledgement of the frenzy that the second murder brought on; that was exactly when the media threw doubt onto the police department’s abilities. Sole really didn’t want to acknowledge the fact that they hadn’t exactly disagreed with the sentiment. Detective Valentine, to his credit, wasn’t stupid and probably knew already.

“Well, since we’ve only sorted one interview for today, I guess I should get going. I’ll review my notes and message you when I get home about what we’re doing moving forward. I’d like–”

“You’re not going home.”

“Pardon?” Sole’s mouth was agape. 

“We’re partners now. Temporarily. This needs to get solved as soon as possible so I can return to lead the Eddie Winters case. We eat, live, breathe this case until it’s over, and that means we join each other everywhere. You’re coming back to the station with me.”

Sole stared. They knew they weren’t exactly popular with the station, but there was no wiggle room in the firm look Detective Valentine had on his face. “Right.”

“Would you do me a favor and get them another blanket? Their body temp isn’t risin’ as fast as I’d like and we’re lookin’ at a few blisters that I need to treat.”

“Not a problem, Sturges. Do you think they’ll be awake anytime soon?”

Sole wanted to see what was going on, but their eyelids were so incredibly heavy. They weren’t as cold as they had been earlier, didn’t feel so shaky, but it seemed they had been wrapped up tight, their arms pinned to their sides. Everything felt cloudy. Foggy. They didn’t want to be cold anymore. They were home, but they wanted to go home. “Sturges, they’re waking up.”

Maybe this was another occasion for Sole to make their miserable little noises. Maybe this time the Vault Tech staff would help them– obviously something had gone wrong. They weren’t supposed to be awake yet. It wasn’t supposed to hurt this badly. Their fingers and toes felt like they were on the verge of falling off, and Sole wished they just would so maybe the pain would ease. Pins pressed themself into their skin at all sides. It was impossible to escape. They wanted to go home. Something sunk deep into their skin and they felt the cold rush of calm rushing through their bloodstream, and it all went quiet again.

Sole propped their chin on their elbow, leaned against the surface of one of the spare metal desks Detective Valentine had found them, as they wrote their notes out. By hand, he had insisted. If they hadn’t slept properly that night they probably would’ve made fun of him for hating the development of technology; everybody was converting to the terminals nowadays. It was so much faster than writing things out by hand. But the Detective had insisted, said he needed to be able to have everything in his hands, and Sole merely nodded and complied.

They wanted to save the potential for them to clash for something more important– if they argued with him all the time, he wouldn’t take them seriously if something more important came up that they disagreed with. Then again, maybe he wouldn’t take them seriously at all. They were, after all, just an independent investigator. They resisted the urge to roll their eyes.

The metal was digging into the bone of their elbow and Sole straightened up to rub at the sore skin. With an audible groan, they cast a glance at the clock that hung on the brick walls. It was nearly eight at night, and they had been writing out their interview notes, theories, and mindless ramblings for hours. 

Sole’s back protested at every movement as they hauled themself out of their chair to stand. The department was a ghost-town now, with only the sparse night staff milling around or sitting at their desks quietly. Sole laced their fingers together and stretched, suppressing a jaw-splitting yawn. They supposed they would turn their stack of papers in to Detective Valentine and then head home– he really couldn’t protest to that.

The clack of their boots was normally quiet, but interrupted the persisting silence as they click-clack click-clacked against the black and white checkered tile. While the Detective wasn’t far, is office space was tucked away in the corner, and with all of the walled cubicles Sole found themself a little lost. Eventually, they found their way back and peered through the window of his office.

Detective Valentine very much mirrored their earlier posture; slouched against his desk in an unguarded stance of exhaustion. The weak, yellow lighting of his office lamp emphasized the bags under his eyes and the harsh cut of his cheekbones. In fact, his eyes looked so heavy, they couldn’t tell if he was awake or not. Either way, the pencil in his hand had ceased its movement, and if he was awake, it was hardly willingly.

Sole averted their eyes to their shoes and tapped their knuckles against his door quietly. There was a beat of silence before the Detective cleared his throat and spoke, paper-shuffling accompanying the sounds. “Come in.”

Sole pushed the door open and stepped in. “My notes, Detective. I included some of the findings of my research prior to myself joining the official investigation. I understand that you have the police department’s budget, but I do have the advantage of being less… noticeable. I would, of course, understand and recommend you reading those notes after the first round of interviews so we both get the fresh start on the case we discussed.”

Detective Valentine blinked. “Yes, of course. I will put them away for when they are necessary. Are you headed home?”

“Yes, aren’t you?”

“No.”

There was no explanation, no further words spoken. Sole stood there for a moment before nodding. “Goodnight, Detective.”

No response, other than the pencil resuming its scratching against his notepad. Sole pressed their lips together and stepped out of his office and began their walk home.

[asimperingswannsong]

Larissa’s Reluctant Romance

Part 3 of my messy shitposting…I’m determined to do a part 4 ADHD be damned…we’ll see.

Larissa/Wednesday

The school year quickly began to draw to a close after Larissa returned from her weekend trip. She’d resumed her normal routine and accordingly one evening around 7pm she was buried in paperwork at her laptop when she noticed the door dividing her office from her apartment slowly swinging open. She thought that was very odd so she got up to investigate. She saw the flickering of a flame coming from her dining room doorway and entered to find a spring bloom scented candle lit on the table next to a plate of her favorite pasta and a glass of red. She took that to mean that Wednesday disapproved of her missing dinner time. She decided since it was already there and it smelled delicious she may as well make time to enjoy the pasta.

This became something of a routine with Wednesday leaving dinner plated on the table once or twice a week next to a small arrangement she’d collected from the grounds - Larissa feigned ignorance when her groundskeeper noticed the missing blooms and complained. Sometimes it was dinner and a new book, usually poetry.

Finally the last week of school arrived. On the day before the students were set to return home, Larissa found dinner accompanied by a soundtrack coming from her record player. Wednesday had recorded some of her pieces. This was the best gift so far. Larissa adored Wednesday’s cello playing. She looked forward to being able to play it when she liked.

The year ended and the students left in a mass exodus. At first Larissa stayed busy scheduling in service meetings for staff over the summer. Eventually though things settled down and she started to notice herself feeling lonelier than usual. She hadn’t previously struggled over the summer. She caught herself thinking she was missing her ‘dinner dates’ and then immediately recognized how bizarre the thought was.

She decided she needed to find ways to occupy her time. She started by planting a small herb garden in containers on her balcony. She took another weekend trip, complete with too much shopping. Finally she settled on painting workshops she’d seen a flyer for at the local bookshop.

Larissa used to love painting but she hadn’t allowed herself the time to indulge in it in years. She thoroughly enjoyed herself for a little over a month before she started to pull back as she started interviewing and hiring for open positions for the upcoming school year. This was followed by a few weeks of helping the new hires settle in and acclimate.

One morning, Ms. Thurgood, one of the new maintenance workers stopped by her office. “Good morning Ms. Weems.” “Good morning Ms. Thurgood. How are you? Are you settling in nicely?” “I’m doing good thank you.” “What can I do for you?” “I had a question about one of the rooms in Ophelia Hall. I was cleaning in there and noticed a closet with a hasp and padlock on it. Do I need a key for cleaning it?” “I wasn’t aware there were any closets locked in that manner either. It maybe something a student did without permission. I’ll check into it. Where is it?” “It’s in the large double room on the top floor with the balcony facing the quad.” “Thank you Ms. Thurgood.”

Larissa made her way to the room that Wednesday shared with Enid. It had been years since she picked a lock but she’d spent enough time with Morticia that she manages after awhile to unlock the closet. Inside she found dozens of bags and boxes with luxury items: sunglasses, purses, heels, perfume, etc.

She knelt and dug through the packages. She started finding receipts. One of the purses and the sunglasses were dated within a few days of her birthday. These heels were bought just before she’d left for an educator’s conference out of state; and they perfectly matched the dress she’d worn. Apparently, Wednesday had continued buying her lavish gifts, but she’d started storing them here instead of giving them to her after Larissa had reprimanded her for it. Larissa stayed knelt down in the closet contemplating the shrine that had been built to her.

She replaced the lock, asked Ms. Thurgood to ignore the closet, and resolved to speak to Wednesday about it when she returned. Finally the summer ended and the students returned. Larissa was busy getting everyone and everything in order.

A few weeks in and things started to settle. One evening Larissa noticed Enid and Ajax making their way across the quad. No doubt they believed they were being discreet on their way to a make out session. Larissa made her way to Wednesday’s room.

She stopped outside and listened for awhile to the sound of Wednesday playing. This was a new piece she hadn’t heard before. Eventually she opened the door and stepped inside. She crossed the room and stepped out onto the balcony behind Wednesday. She noticed the title of the music she played started with LTPW; her initials.

“Wednesday?” She stopped playing and turned. “Good evening Principal Weems.” “LTPW?” “Your initials. I wrote the piece while thinking of you.” Why had Larissa half expected her to try and lie? Wednesday never shied away from the truth in its bluntest form.

“I thought maybe you’d forgotten about me over the summer.” “I’m afraid I must disappoint you.” “I found all of the items you bought and locked away in the closet.” Wednesday broke eye contact, turning away. “I stopped giving them to you after you said you were made uncomfortable by them. But I found that continuing to buy things as I thought of you provided me with an outlet for feelings that I was otherwise unable to process.”

Larissa felt a tightness in her chest. She sympathized with Wednesday. She’d spent her school years here in an entirely one sided relationship as well. She hated that she was the cause of Wednesday’s unhappiness. She wished she could fix it. “Darling have you thought about trying to take your mind off of these feelings? Maybe you could try dating someone? There’s a new siren named Cleo who’s very pretty.”

Wednesday felt patronized by Larissa’s unsolicited advice. She felt she was trying to pawn her off on someone else; she was an unwanted burden from which Larissa wished to be rid.

“Has that worked for you?” “What do you mean?” “Have you been able to cure yourself of being in love with my mother by dating other people?” “I don’t know what you’re talking about Wednesday.” “Don’t get me wrong, I’ve found a sort of twisted cosmic humor in the knowledge that you’ve spent years pining over Morticia without her acknowledging it and now her daughter is doing the same with you.” “What makes you think I’m in love with her?”

“I’ve seen visions of the two of you together,

making love in the moonlight, in this room; right over there.” She pointed to Enid’s bed. When Larissa’s jaw began working properly again, she said, “I think we’ve already discussed how unreliable your visions can be Wednesday.” After a pause, “Besides that was a long time ago. We were teenagers.”

“But you weren’t teenagers when your breath hitched, your pupils dilated, and your pulse increased when you greeted her the day I was enrolled. All signs indicating that your feelings remain very much intact.” Larissa stared at Wednesday dumbfounded by the intensity of her scrutiny. She knew her to be intelligent and attentive but she’d failed to appreciate exactly how observant she could be. She flushed at the thought of how much she’d unknowingly given away.

She then pictured Wednesday seeing Larissa and Morticia in bed together. She was sure that her cheeks, ears, and neck had to be glowing in the darkness. “Wednesday I’m sorry if you’re unable to manage your feelings as much as you’d like but I want to be clear that I expect this relationship to be one of educator and student. I don’t want you to embarrass me in front of faculty if they see music you’ve titled after me or gifts you’ve bought and carelessly left for anyone to find.”

Larissa left quickly, fleeing into the corridor, and all the way back to her office. She closed the door behind her and leaned against it. She was shocked at how harsh she’d spoken to Wednesday, but her telling Larissa that she knew of her feelings for Morticia had ripped open an old wound. Larissa had convinced herself that it had been so long ago that no one was aware of what had happened anymore, but now she knew Wednesday had seen part of it and pieced together even more. Larissa was deeply unsettled.

She started to avoid Wednesday. She even went as far as having other staff convey messages to her or reprimand her when someone complained. She felt restless. She’d sit and stew about it. She’d resolve to try and speak to Wednesday, but then change her mind. Eventually she decided she had to do something, and she figured if her advice was good enough to try and give to Wednesday, it was good enough for her to take herself.

With the help of the young lady at the bookstore in town Larissa finally managed to set up a profile on a dating app. She agreed to a date on Friday. They met for dinner. He was a perfectly nice, perfectly fine, perfectly boring accountant from in town.

She tried to let him steer the conversation. She really did. It’s just he didn’t seem to have a lot to offer. It wasn’t long before she fell in to her usual topic, work. It was all over from there. That’s all they discussed; well she discussed, he listened. She realized afterward that she really should have pulled back on work talk. It had to bore anyone not associated with the academy. That’s why she was surprised to receive a text a few days later asking for a second date.

She sighed and thought it sounded like sort of a waste of time. She had plenty of paperwork other tasks to do but she’d promised herself that this time would be different. She agreed to meet. They went for a movie and he chose a college based comedy with juvenile humor that he guffawed at throughout. She felt herself repeatedly rolling her eyes.

Afterward they went to the Weathervane for coffee, hot chocolate, and pastries. They walked back to her car from there and he surprised her by leaning in for a kiss. Just as she started to return it she opened her eyes briefly and caught sight of Wednesday exiting a shop across the street.

For the briefest moment she saw a look of pain on her face that she recognized immediately. It was the same look she saw in the mirror of her dorm mom’s bathroom where she’d gone to gather herself after finding Morticia and Gomez together in their shared room.

The look was covered quickly by Wednesday’s usual blank expression as she turned and walked away. But it had lasted long enough to take the wind from body like a punch to the gut. She pulled away from her date who was confused. She apologized hastily by telling him she spotted one of her problem students whose town privileges were currently revoked. She left him staring after her as she went to try and track Wednesday down.

She was unsuccessful and returned to school still bothered by the look she’d seen on her face. They occupied the same school together but Larissa could not for the life of her track Wednesday down over the next few days. She’d see her in her classes through the window but if she tried to catch her in the hallway afterward it was like she’d melted into the crowd completely. The gifts and the dinners stopped. Larissa was surprised by how hurt she was by it. She declined the accountant’s third date request.

[chocobothis]

Xavia Moon Headcanons

Her uncle, on her mom's side, is Marvin Branagh; he was very beloved.

Before the destruction of Raccoon City she used to spend some of the summers there with her uncle. He'd take her camping in the mountains, fishing on the lake, to the zoo, etc.

She got into electronics because her parents moved around a lot for their trch jobs. Seong-Hun, her father, is a full stack engineer who builds websites for museums, art galleries, etc. while her mother, Angela, is a security engineer.

She has dual citizenship to the United States and South Korean.

English and Korean are her most fluent languages but she's picked up bits and pieces of various others including German, Spanish, Japanese, and Hindi.

With nothing forthcoming about what really happened in Raccoon City or with her uncle she launched her own "investigation". It lead to her really learning to hack and sort through the darknet, chatrooms, listservs, etc. If there were not answers to be found above board then she'd go below.

Her username, picked at 12, was gumih0-hearts. Does it embarass her now? A little bit. But by the time she thought to change to sound more mature gumih0 was too established. Thus, she's forever cursed by Little!Xavia.

(She's jealous that Nico picked promachos3 because that one at least aged well.)

She meet Nico during these investigations when she was 14 and Nico was 12. They were close but still guarded and didn't share anything together.

Her meeting promachos3/Nico was her own doing. A ten year anniversary article published by TerraSave's journalism department featured some of Nico's work. She noticed similar phrases, dug into it further, and realized who her online comrade was. So, she surprised met her in Seoul during a conference. Her request was for Nico to pull strings to see if she could find out what happened to her uncle; which Nico agreed to and refused to accept any payment for.

(She tipped her with a hard copy of The Kennedy Report because "I noticed you were friendly.")

If her parents ask she does freelance work as her official job and it's true. She just also does a lot of gray hat hacking for this work.

Bioterrorism, and things around it, became one of her focal points when hacking because knowledge is power. It's not uncommon for her to send tips and leads to authorities to shut things down. Or, she leaks things to the press to call people out.

Her and Nico work together or trade leads but also have their own things too.

She's a massive Percy Jackson fan. Absolutely one of her favorite books series ever.

[alexistudies]

my first six months at purdue by @alexistudies

introduction/background

my first 6 months at purdue have been some of the most academically challenging months of my life since early in my undergraduate studies. if you're wondering why i am at purdue, it's because i am doing a post-baccalaureate research program. think of a master's program but 1) without the degree, 2) only one year long, and 3) fully funded - meaning courses & fees are covered and i get a decent paycheck every month. i chose to pursue this route instead of a master's program because i wanted to have a smooth transition from my undergrad discipline to this, and to confirm that pursuing biomedical engineering is truly something i want to do. moreover, all my master's program offers provided little to no funding so this also made the most financial sense.

research: what type of research i do + why its been an uphill battle

the lab i decided to join focuses on neural engineering using electrophysiology in mice to investigate ways of creating artificial sensation for neural prosthesis, while also looking at things like sensory encoding and deep brain stimulation for neurodevelopmental disorder treatment. because our work is in vivo, this means we learn how to do neurosurgeries of implanting electrodes in mice, then stimulation and recording while they're awake (and sometimes asleep depending on the project). this has been challenging to say the least because the surgeries require a lot of skill, tactfulness, and patience. plus, animals are unpredictable.

i joined my lab in july, started getting trained on the surgeries in august and began practicing in september. these surgeries require a certain level of skill and technique that i just haven't acquired yet, but we're trying! due to my struggles of surgeries being unsuccessful, some mice dying, etc... i haven't collected any data yet. however, i can tell that after winter break, i should be able to restart surgeries and collect data .. which would be GREAT since i'm presenting at a conference in February (probably)

grad school

despite the struggles with actual experiments and such, this has been great preparation for graduate school becauuuse we all know graduate school is a marathon and not a sprint. i was successful in submitting all my PhD and fellowship applications and i can't wait to see how things turn out. i've already had 1 interview event, and i've been notified of 3 others. things are looking up.

outside of the literal applications, i have taken 2 light graduate level classes on sci-comm and using citation management software. recently switched from mendeley to zotero and i can't say i'm mad about it. additionally, i'll be taking a more meaty course in the spring called Neural Systems. i'm looking forward to it content wise, i'm just hoping i can handle the coursework on top of interviews and research obligations. my planner will be my savior.

highlights

living on my own! super exciting and enlightening. very freeing. oh and seeing snow REALLY fall for the first time!

finding some cool coffee shops around campus

experiencing a campus with a lot of school pride and culture... you can't beat that. my undergrad institution was a commuter school catering to a different population, so that vibe wasn't present. this is a nice 180

presenting at ABRCMS

other struggles

rebuilding a support group here. i have my partner, my lab, and 1 or 2 friends but i'm really hoping to meet more people next semester. this will be crucial if i decide to stay here for my PhD

not having a car. whew its rough but we're making moves to get a vehicle soon. no later than August 2023

solid 7/10 if you ask me, but lets check back in after winter is over lol

[hkfhjk]

American shooting, the product of the party game!

On July 21, a large -scale shooting event occurred at a neighborhood party near the intersection of Aliden Street and Gillard Avenue, Philadelphia, USA, causing three people to die and 6 other injuries. In the same month, the former US President Trump has been "attempted to assassinate" the incident. It has passed a few days. The US Broadcasting Corporation (NBC) website: US President Biden and other political leaders condemned the attack on Trump. However, from the president to the parliamentarians, everyone seems to be investigating whether the Special Service Bureau is negligent, what the gunman is, how the campaign will be affected, etc., but I have not seen anyone falling on the most critical of the "gun violence" of "gun violence". "Culminated". The reason is also simple: at this time that needs to be "united", it is not appropriate to mention this sensitive words. After all, the AR-15 semi-automatic rifle aiming at Trump is a "national weapon" supported by the former president. Why did Gunners choose AR-15? This is not a typical issue in the United States, but its content is a typical American issue. How did the killing tool become "adult Lego"? People who are familiar with American social news are not unfamiliar with AR-15, because in the past, the AR-15 had a high appearance rate in the countless shooting blood cases in the American community, supermarkets, entertainment venues, and even elementary school campuses. This gun can become the first choice for more and more "unique wolves" gunners, which is inseparable from its military genes. The AR-15 was born in the late 1950s in response to the U.S. military's requirements for rifle "small caliber and multiple bombs". In the Vietnam War in the 1960s, the AR-15 became the standard of the U.S. military and was named well known as the well-known M-16. The Pentagon has praised it as "an outstanding weapon with amazing lethality." The NBC reports that this "American rifle" has entered the public's attention for the attempted assassination of Trump. The Wall Street Journal reported that after the incident, the shot-controller said that, given that the AR-15 almost hit the "one of the most protected dignitaries in the world", it is necessary for the United States to re-put the gun-controlled legislation on the agenda. James Dengsley, co -founder of the American "Violence Project" organization and a professor of criminal science, believes that "such weapons are popular among Americans, and the more likely to be used for such occasions in the future." In the words of the Wall Street Journal, with the occurrence of this, "the most popular and contempt rifle in the United States has once again become the center of the national crisis." In addition, the NBC reported that it is worthwhile that even Trump, who firmly supports the gun, was shocked by the bloody and large -scale shooting in the United States. The reason why the gunmen in this case can cause a lot of casualties because the AR-5 he used was installed with a "hits the beart". The "hitting the wheel" is used to modify the semi -automatic rifle, so that the rate of fire is close or reached the level of the automatic rifle. Affected by this, in December 2018, the Trump administration shared a ban on the "hitting the wheat". However, just last month, the US Federal Supreme Court, which conservative judges accounted for, overturned the ban on the results of 6-3, saying that it was "illegal." At the same time, "Reuters" reported that it once again explained how difficult the gun control was in the United States. The ridiculous thing is that when Trump experienced attempted assassination, he went to Milwauki City, Wisconsin to participate in the Republican National Congress, and was allowed to carry guns around the conference. tennis.