#to amp up the yuri of it all

[technicolorxsn]

okay maybe this isn't a joke

writes an aikawa/risu fic and tags it f/f with no explanation

[ljaesch]

Yen Press' Announcements at Anime NYC 2024

Yen Press announced during its Anime NYC 2024 panel that it has licensed the following manga and light novels for release in February and March 2025: Title: I’ll Become a Villainess Who Goes Down in History novels Creators: Izumi Ōkido (story), Jyun Hayase (illustration) Summary: I’ve never been able to stand the typical heroine’s “goody-two-shoes” routine. Thankfully, all my dreams come true…

[orchidyoonkook]

To What We Were Before, And All The Things After | JJK | Ch. 8

Title: Photo Shoots and Blasphemous Discoveries

Pairing: Prince!College Student!JK x Fine Arts Major!(F)!Reader

Series Rating//Genre: (M) | College AU, Mild Royalty AU, Smut, Angst, Fluff, S2F2L, Indiffernce to lovers, sloooowwww ass burn

Summary: You're just there to help JK with his final project, so why are you being doused in water, facepaint and smoke? Art. Art is why.

Warnings: T, language, fluff, angst, honestly this one's kinda wholesome and fun, some photogrpahy jargin in there, but nothing a quick google search can't fix if you really need to <3, it's mostly surface level jargin. Also the smoke machine works cuz JK has great ventilation due to the massive windows being open, so don't worry bout that XD, some light and fun name calling, some world building. Ask if you need clarification on anything. That's all I think!

Word Count: 11,684

Release Date: September 1, 2024. 4:30PM

A/N 1: Surprise! Happy JK Day.

Series: Chapter One | Chapter Two | Chapter Three | Chapter Four | Chapter Five | Chapter Six | Chapter Seven

PJK [7:36pm]: Saturday afternoon. my place. 11am.  PJK [7:36pm]: bring an extra set of clothes, something warm. Sweats if you have them. PJK [7:37pm]: also, Im gunna need your shirt size

The first three weeks of November have flown by and dragged on at the same time.

The weather’s getting colder. You need a thick jacket if you want to be anywhere outside, and all leaves have fallen from the trees, leaving pines the only ones left with their winter coats on. Hot chocolate from greenhouse cafe has become part of your life’s blood so you don’t freeze, and gloves with pocket warmers inside them are once again a part of your everyday. 

But November skies have returned. And you frequently set up camp on the drying grass beside the greenhouse, dressing your canvas with oil paint to their likeness as it’s the only paint that doesn’t dry the second it’s out of the tube in the cold, static air.

Jungkook told you earlier in the week the shoot would most likely be this weekend, and that he just had a few final strings to pull together before being able to confirm. So with that in mind, you intentionally tried to finish all your work before this weekend, knowing the shoot will take a while to complete.

He mentioned it may leak over into Sunday depending on how much you get done on the first day, which is fine with you considering you usually spend Sunday evenings at his place anyway. You’d consider it an extended edition of your regularly scheduled broadcast.

And speaking of regularly scheduled, you haven’t missed a single movie night since Nel left. Granted, it’s only been three weeks, but even missing the two you did because of Nel had made an impact. 

You’d gotten so used to them, having that time to destress and unwind before the week starts. A nice little routine that helps reset you both mentally and physically.

Suddenly not having that was…a weird feeling you try not to remember. 

And you are more than happy to never miss another one ever again.

You aren’t sure what Jungkook tells Adaline he’s doing during movie night, but she’s never interrupted you, not even once. And it’s something you are increasingly grateful for, because she is one of the things you destress from as your unspoken rivalry always amps up the closer to exam season you get.

It’s Thursday evening, and you’re in your room finishing up a Microeconomics 3 assignment while piano music plays on a speaker in the corner. You use it to help you focus, and it’s working its magic as you’re finishing your work in record time. 

Music has always helped you work better, and you credit it largely with how you’ve been able to keep up with everything in your schooling.

Yuri’s in her room, doing homework as well you assume. Or maybe texting Tai—the dreamy, big dicked Ilcalos island Count—you swear she’s only put her phone down for sleep and showering, as she’s constantly checking to see if he’s messaged her. And you hope it turns out well for them, Yuri deserves someone who treats her well. Especially after the whole Jungkook debacle—which you’re not allowed to bring up—and then the poor rebound you aren’t allowed to talk about either. You’re just happy she’s finally found someone worth her time.

Picking up your phone, you shoot Jungkook a text back.

You [7:40pm]: okay! saturday at 11 sounds good. I’ll bring sweats and warm socks

You message him your shirt size too, curious as to what he’ll use it for, but you’re sure you’ll find out in due time. You always do.

Subject to many of his homework assignments, you’ve been posed and lit and adjusted every which way. 

Jungkook is incredibly professional when you’re with him as a model. Light touches to correct posing, always with a ‘may I’ before he does, and he fills the room with kind words, good vibes, and fun music so you never feel awkward. 

At first you were really iffy on the whole idea when he first asked in September, because it would be the prince of your nation photographing little ol’ you. You weren’t anything special—yet—and you’re still never one for being in the spotlight, or for being on camera. At all. But if it was just for homework, and you were helping out a friend…you figured why not? 

It helped that all of your worries immediately faded when you saw the results of that first shoot.

An email from a very non-princely email address found its way into your inbox. The subject was the date of the shoot, and the only message inside being:

 thanks. Hope you like them. 

Let’s do it again sometime.

-J

When you opened the attachments you made a quick dive to catch the phone that fell from your hands in shock. 

You looked…beautiful. Like you never had in pictures before. Not in school, or at graduation, not even in the ones you took of yourself. 

You didn’t know you were capable of looking like that. 

Like how he saw you. Captured you. 

And you’ll never admit you’ve held your chin a little higher with every shoot since.

They make you feel powerful, attractive. More confident, and sure of yourself, as if you were always meant to be in front of a camera. Like you’d been in front of one since before you could walk.

They do that for you.

He…does that for you—with his pictures, of course.

Jungkook is very talented. Very skilled with his camera, and you find yourself looking forward to the concepts he comes up with every time. Trusting him and whatever his vision is wholeheartedly. 

Though a small, immature piece of you is also pleased he still wants you to model, and not Adaline. That he finds you easier to work with over her.

Your competitive streak never fails to come out, even with the smallest, secretive things.

Take that Adaline.

You gladly help him out with his homework, and he does the same for you. 

If you ever need a male reference or a profile study. Anatomy practice, features practice, likeness practice. Anything and almost everything, all you have to do is ask, and he sits still or places whatever you need in front of you while you sketch.

Hands, however, have always been a personal favourite of yours.

They’re one of those things that can be drawn a hundred different ways and never look the same. Always a new position you can put them in. Consistently able to shake things up. And one set is never like the others—like eyes. There’s little differences in all of them and that’s where their magic lies.

You do these studies at the greenhouse, it has the best light to shadow ratio. When you ask him for one, he’ll switch to working with one hand, while the other does whatever you tell it. Normally either placed on your table or if there isn’t enough room, which nine times out of ten there isn’t because of all your supplies, you stick your foot on the lower metal frame of his table and he rests his arm, wrist or palm on your up bent knee. 

Due to this, you’ve unintentionally come to find out that his hands are very strong, very calloused, and very, very warm…

Also! Aside from hand studies, you love loose figure studies because they’re great warm up sketches. And what Jungkook doesn't know is that you have dozens of warm up sketches of him. Doesn’t know you sneak pictures here and there when you can, hiding them in a hidden album on your phone entitled ‘hmwk screenshots.’ And he definitely doesn’t know that when he’s sitting at the cafe, nose deep in assignments, you doodle his features or his outfit in real time.

A nose here, a jacket there. A muscular forearm covered in tattoos also tends to find its way onto your page every so often.

He’s got a good physique. And the ridges make for excellent anatomy practice. So does the intricate line work of tattoos, and fabric rippling. Especially in drastic lighting. Consistency is key in maintaining and improving your work and it’s not like any of these sketches will ever see the light of day anyways. 

They’re just, well…practice. 

A sigh escapes you, and you refocus on finishing your microecon work. You still have two more assignments to get done before Saturday at eleven.

“And why are you working with some random girl when I’m available, again?” Adaline asks. She’s currently sitting on Jungkook's couch in your spot. He’s setting up tomorrow's materials against the big white wall by the floor length windows that showcase his balcony.

It’s why he chose to live here instead of in the dorms or on campus. His place isn’t enormous, like most people would think, it has enough room for everything a regular student needs: bedroom, kitchen, workspace, living room, bathroom, even a guest room. But the one thing he keeps different is the big white wall where a dining room would normally be. 

Jungkook’s place has high ceilings, 10 feet tall, which is higher than the average but not excessive. And the wall that connects his kitchen to the balcony is a perfect mock studio. He can even keep all his equipment there; lights, gels, backgrounds, tubs full of props, camera cases, lenses, and more all stored in neat shelving against another wall. 

“Because students volunteered for extra credit, and she’s who was assigned to me,” a small lie, one he was sure that Adaline wouldn’t dig into too deeply. 

“Why didn’t you tell me I could volunteer?”

“Because you didn’t need the extra credit?”

She pouts, and goes back to her phone.

Adaline also doesn’t know it’s you he’s photographing and that is one hundred percent intentionally planned by him. 

He could sense something between you two after you made that one comment after fall break. He notices now how you stiffen slightly every time he mentions Adaline, and the one time he mentioned you in passing to test the waters, Adaline changed the conversion topic almost immediately. A look of annoyance, or maybe even insecurity in her eyes.

So he’s been lucky that Adaline has never wanted to see any of his schoolwork prior to or after the singular shoot he did with her. 

Lucky she hasn’t seen your face fill up his screen constantly. 

And extremely lucky that she doesn’t know about the hidden folder buried deep in his desktop labeled ‘eqpmt rcpts’ filled with dozens of candid shots of you.

To be fair, you don’t know about them either. They’re random, shots taken every now and then where he thought you looked happy, focused, or just existing. True candids of the most candid person he knew.

It started that day with his first assignment from Professor Hirmer. He’d taken those quick pictures of you painting, and then simply never stopped. 

He has pictures of you in the courtyard, walking and talking to Yuri, you smiling. He has some he took on his phone when you’re over for movie night, invested in the film or talking to him. And a bunch of you painting at the greenhouse. It’s hard to take secret candids when he’s right beside you, but he manages seeing as you haven't caught him yet.

He even has a few of you and Nel, love clearly written on your face in every single one of them.

Whenever he spots you before you spot him, and he has his camera on him, he takes a couple. 

They’ve amassed into a healthy sum, but he thinks of it as a harmless habit as no one will ever know. And it’s not like he’s following you around to take them or using them for anything nefarious. 

He just likes taking your picture. Capturing your spirit, your candor. 

Your realness. 

You are wholly yourself, always, no holding back, all of the time. 

And to him, it feels like coming up for a breath of fresh air.

“Hey!” you say as you let yourself into Jungkook’s apartment. You’d knocked but no one answered and it was currently 10:56am on Saturday, so you knew he was here. Plus, his door was unlocked.

“Jungkook?” you call. 

No answer.

You take your shoes off after closing the door and locking it. He should really keep his door locked. 

Very quickly become best friends with the couch, you toss your backpack of warm clothes on the floor while you wait for him to make an appearance. 

There’s shoot equipment everywhere; lights in the corner, some with soft boxes on them, gels laid out on the coffee table, and what you’ve come to learn is a lens case sits on the couch beside you in Jungkook's usual spot. 

Jungkook has also somehow managed to find some small trees in blue ceramic pots and what you’re pretty sure is a smoke machine. 

But the most peculiar thing is what looks to be a kiddie pool up against the wall with a folded tarp at its base. 

Well that's…interesting…

You hear a door open somewhere in the apartment and running water. 

“Jungkook? That you?”

“Hey! Yep. Just give me a sec, I’m almost done.”

The water sounds cease and Jungkook makes his grand entrance as he turns the corner holding a large watering can. Your eyebrow raises.

“For the trees?” you ask.

“What?” 

You point to the watering can currently making his veins pop. 

He laughs, “Oh! No. This is for later. You’ll see,” and walks to the other side of the room by the pool. 

“Aren’t we mysterious today,” you say, following him with your eyes. He’s in ripped black jeans that accentuate the muscle definition of his thighs, and a matching baggy shirt. When his back is turned you snap a quick picture. The fabric folds on his baggy shirts are some of your favourite mindless things to cool down sketch.

“Nah, just focused. We have a lot to get through today.”  He sets down the watering can and you can see the moment the switch flips from friend to photographer. “The guest room is ready for you. There’s a clothing rack inside with each look labeled. There’s also makeup and face paint, if you could bring out the make up after you're done changing, that would be great. We’re gonna start with ‘Bright and Bold’, okay?” 

You usually use the spare room as a change room when you have to switch clothes for a shoot. But they were always from your own closet. He’d tell you the concept he was going for and you’d bring a few options to choose from.

Makeup you were used to, though. Jungkook loves abusing your artistic abilities for his shoots in the way you decorate your face or body, saying they make his works a level up from the rest of his classmates. 

They also usually make for some of the coolest pictures you have of yourself.

This is the first time he’s ever bought clothing, though.

You shouldn’t be as surprised as you are, this being his final assignment for an important class, and him being as serious as he is about his work and the final product. But you can't help it, you’re excited to see everything he’s chosen for the shoot. 

For you.

For the shoot.

“Yep, sounds good. Be out in a few,” you reply. He nods in acknowledgement before moving to set something up and you don’t stick around to find out, grabbing your bag and heading towards the door lined hall. 

The guest room is modest and clean. White sheets and gray comforter with, surprisingly, two throw pillows to spruce it up. The walls are white too, but you’re pretty sure that’s because Jungkook’s not allowed to paint the apartment per his landlord's wishes—a thought that still makes you laugh.

He could buy any place he wanted, but chose to rent. ‘To get the real university experience,’ he explained when you asked him the first time you went over.

Black furniture accents the room. A comfortable looking leather chair sits in the corner by a glass door that leads to the balcony. It has a small table beside it. There’s a dresser with a mirror in the other corner and of course, in the center of the room, is the bed. It’s a nice room. However, the newest edition is what’s keeping your eye.

Four shirts hang from the rack at the foot of the bed. The first is vibrant and colourful, the second a light neutral short sleeved V neck, third is strapless and skin coloured, and the last is made from thin black fabric you assume will be skin tight by the looks of it. 

As promised, they’re all labeled with a sticker. 

You throw your bag on the bed and grab the colourful one first. Its sticker says ‘bright and bold,’ and you put it on after removing the shirt you came in, then zip it up. The material feels heavy, durable and expensive. You check the tag on the inside seam and see it’s from Ilkaya, one of the biggest and most expensive fashion designers on this side of the realm. 

Your eyes bug out of your head, and you try not to breathe too hard for fear of ruining it. Your routine of thrifting all your clothes makes you pretty damn sure you can’t even imagine how much this cost. 

It feels good though, comfortable, not itchy. Really freaking expensive.

You look at yourself in the mirror, and you have to admit you look amazing. It fits perfectly in all the right places, compliments your skin tone, and even brings out your eyes. Begrudgingly, you admit to yourself that maybe there’s some sense in what the price tag could be. But it would still be a ridiculous sum for a jacket.

With one last look in the mirror, you grab the palettes, brushes and other tools off the dresser, and leave your designated dressing room for the day in favour of returning to the living room. 

Jungkook’s got music going from your shared playlist. Insisting on making one after your second shoot together, when he decided you both agreed to the arrangement becoming a regular thing. It’s a good mix of both of your musical tastes, even though you guys figured out quickly that you liked pretty similar stuff anyway. 

“What do you think? Does it work?” You ask as you turn the corner. 

Jungkook fiddles with this camera before looking and pausing for a moment to take you in. You hope you look okay, but the weird look he has on his face makes you backtrack a bit. 

“Is this not the one you wanted? It had the label on it. But I can go back and double che- ”

“You look amazing,” is all he says, and your worry slides off you instantly. He smiles wide, the one you’ve come to recognize as genuine. 

“Thanks. But the colour’s doing most of the work for me,” you say, smiling back shyly.

He has a white background set up, and two differently coloured gel’d lights sit on opposite one another, a third, smaller floor light faces the background. A backlight, he’d call it. 

Bright and Bold indeed, though there is the matter of-

“What do you want me to do for my make up?”

“Actually,” he sets down his camera gently on a table, “Is it okay if I do it? I want it to be a little more on the amateur side and I don’t think your years of refined talent would let you get the exact look I want.” 

That’s new. But you're here to stand and look however he wants you too, so you allow him with a nod. 

“Sure, where do you want me to sit?”

“Here’s fine,” he says as he pulls a stool that was off to one side close to one of the windows. “As long as you don’t mind holding the make up. I don’t have a table to set them down on.  Should’ve thought of that, sorry.” 

You can tell he’s mentally scolding himself for forgetting something.

“No no, it’s fine,” you say, taking your seat, “I don’t mind, really.” 

Placing the balls of your feet on the bar that holds the chair legs together, you make your lap even enough to set the palettes out, and use a hand to hold all the brushes. 

Jungkook laughs, noticing your feet as you sit, “Cute socks.”

They’re light blue with a fox face on them, and little ears stick up from the elastic around the ankle. 

“Thanks,” you laugh too, they’re your favourite pair. “I call them my fox socks. They’re lucky.”

“Let’s hope so. Wish me luck fox socks,” he calls to your toes, and you wiggle them in response.

He picks a brush and chooses a colour. “Close your eyes and let me know if I’m pressing too hard. If it isn’t obvious, I’ve never done this before.”

You close your eyes and whisper, “Will do.”

It's a uniquely intimate experience having your makeup done. Willingly letting someone get up close and personal with you, allowing them to see every potential scar, blemish and pore in the name of beauty and for the sake of creativity. 

In this case, it’s also a little questionable considering where you feel the brush putting down colour: cheeks, lids, temple, nose. However, you’re simply a pawn in a well thought out plan, so you sit and wait for him to finish.

“Annnd done,” he says, making a final swipe with the brush on your cheek. “You look great! I didn’t hurt you, right?” he asks, showing you the makeup in a palettes mirror. Your face looks like it’s been attacked by a rainbow in the best way. You smile, taking the mirror from him and looking at all the little details. 

For a first timer, Jungkook did a really good job. 

“Nope, I’m good. How do you want me?”

Jungkook leads you to the backdrop, placing you in front. 

“One second,” he says, grabbing a remote and clicking a button to lower the black out curtains on the windows, and then another that turns off the apartment lights. He also clicks on all the lights he’s set up and you’re quickly illuminated by a bright red and purple as well as the back light.

“I’m good to pose?” he asks. 

“Yep.” 

You love that he always asks first. It makes you feel safe and considered, consenting to every touch prior to its occurrence. 

Jungkook instructs the first pose to have your hands on the sides of your face, making slight adjustments so that you don’t cover any of the makeup. And for the first time, his touches leave little sparks where they land. 

You’re sure it’s just because of the lights or that the shirt is thick and makes you warm. 

Or maybe you’re just nervous and need to get the first photo jitters out of your system.

Soon enough, the camera’s pointing at you and you smile the brightest you can. He’s given you the prompt of ‘you’re so excited and happy you can’t hold it in,’ and you work with it the best you can, taking the first few with the pose he gave before being given full reign. 

It’s a decent way into the first shoot when Jungkook says, “Hmm…we’re not quite there yet, I need a bit more,” and follows up with, “How about ‘you’ve just been commissioned by the Modern Art Museum to have the leading showcase for next year’.” 

You smile the biggest you think you ever have at the thought. Because that’s the dream, that is the biggest goal you could achieve. An entire gallery of your work as the primary exhibition in the Western Shores Modern Art Museum? You couldn’t go any higher. It’s every artist's dream.

“There you go! That’s it!” The camera’s capturing quickly as you imagine what it would be like to have your own showcase at the WS-MAM. Incredible is the first word that comes to mind, your work in the biggest museum on the continent? You can’t even imagine, but you want to. 

One day, you promise yourself. You’ll do it one day.

“Okay,” Jungkook says, breaking your daydream, “Let me switch out the gels for new colours and go again. These are great so far though, you're doing amazing.” 

You hold your hand out for a high five and he smacks it. “Go team!” you say, and he laughs.

An hour and a half, a makeup fix and three lighting changes later, the first shoot finishes. You collapse on the couch and rub the muscles on your thighs. 

Jungkook plops down beside you, nose deep in the pictures he’s just taken, double checking everythings good.

“This is a fantastic start, I hope we can keep it up all day and finish before tomorrow.”

“Me too,” you say, and you mean it. Shoots with him are always fun, but inevitably tiring. “I’m gonna to grab a water, want one?” 

“Yes please,” he replies without looking up.

In the kitchen, you open the fridge to grab the two bottles and notice a box, stamped with a coffee mug that has a greenhouse inside of it, on top. The greenhouse cafe’s logo. 

“Can I ask what’s inside the cafe box?” you ask as you sit back on the couch and pass him a bottle.

“Ah, caught red handed,” he says, setting his camera on the table and taking a swig. “I may have asked Vivan earlier this week to make sure there was an overstock of tarts so I could grab them for you as a thank you for today.”

...Oh

That’s so sweet. He’s never gotten you a thank you gift before, especially not in the form of the most delicious pastry to ever exist. Maybe you should get him something for all the times he’s helped you with homework? A solstice gift maybe?

There’s heat forming in your chest and you really hope it’s not the beginning stages of heartburn. Maybe Jungkook has antacids. 

“You didn’t have to do that, I’m happy to help.”

“So you don’t want them then?” his shit eating grin making a glorious comeback because he knows what your answer’s going to be.

“No! I want them. I most definitely want them.”

He chuckles and puts his water down.

“Okay Donatello, glad you accept. Let's move on to the next set up. There’s makeup remover and cotton pads in the room, and some moisturizer too if you need it.”

The next shoot is called ‘Regality,’ and it has you in the strapless shirt. You find out it’s quite a low cut when you put it on. There’s enough to cover you, but there’s definitely a lot of your chest showing. However, under the shirt on the hanger is a scarf to cover yourself with, which you think is very considerate.

“Makeup?” you ask as you come out again, scarf covering you.

“Neutral, but strong. Kind of like how my mother does,” the background is still white, but you have a hunch that it will remain white in this picture, unlike the last one. “This one is going to be black and white, so try to emphasize your natural beauty.”

You ignore that he essentially just said you're beautiful, surely he’s just being kind and professional. Making sure his model feels good about herself. 

Right?

Right.

You put on a coat of mascara and go light on the shadow so it won't be too dramatic on film. You also use a shade of lipstick that adds just a tint to your lips and a blush that makes your eyes pop.

Jungkook has you sit on the stool from earlier and faces your body three quarters of the way towards the camera, but keeps your head turned in profile. 

“Oh! Almost forgot, one second,” Jungkook jogs to his room, coming back with a palm sized velvet box. “I had my mother send these over for this shoot. She has better taste than me, so I let her pick them out.”

Your stomach plummets to the floor when he opens the box. 

Inside are two dangling diamond earrings, and quite possibly the most beautiful things you’ve ever seen.

And now you’re terrified. 

“Jungkook, I can't wear those. They look like they’re worth more than my house, my car and my tuition combined.”

He takes one out and places it in your hand for you to put in, it’s the length of your index finger. And all you can think about is the potential houses you’re holding as you look at it. 

It’s a semi-rectangular earring, encrusted with four columns of diamonds that cascade down, each column longer than the previous. Like a sparkling waterfall you can attach to your ear.

“Don’t worry about it, mum said she never wears them anyway because they’re part of a set that the necklace was lost to years ago. Please,” his face is nothing but reassurance and small smiles, “You’re giving them a chance to live again.”

You couldn't say no to those eyes even if you wanted to.

So you reply, almost breathless and still against your better judgment, “Okay.”

Placing them in one after the other, they have a significant, understandable weight to them. You take a couple deep breaths so you don't freak out, and then you return to your previously designated pose, profile set, body facing the camera.

“Can I adjust?” Jungkook asks, after taking a step back and getting a wider view. 

You nod gently, still terrified of the earrings.

He makes sure the earring is visible and untangled first, before a finger gently comes beneath your chin, and lifts it a bit higher. 

The feeling they leave behind is all you can think about as you stare at your place on the wall, Jungkook snapping away. Not even the soft light illuminating your profile is enough to make you blink.

This shoot goes by quickly, and you’re relieved to get the earrings back safely inside their box.

“It’s like 2:45, wanna break for a late lunch?” Jungkook asks. 

“Please, I’m starved,” you say, returning from the guest room after tossing on the sweater you brought. “What's on the menu?”

“Well, we have two options,” he says, looking very faux serious, “1. We order out from wherever you want and awkwardly wait for it to arrive because the next shoot is not one we can’t prep for, then eat, then shoot.  Or 2. I make use of the ingredients I bought to make Bulgogi Kimchi Fried Rice and you get lunch and a show.”

You're shocked. 

Jungkook…cooks? Oh this you absolutely must see.

“Hmm….” you say, pretending to really mull it over in the same ‘serious’ tone, “I’m thinking I’ll have to go with option two, Chef. But I’ll lend a hand where I can, no use in standing around doing nothing.”

“Every chef needs a sous.”

With both of you on task, lunch is getting made quickly. Jungkook has all the ingredients to make ‘my buddy’s famous family recipe,’ a man who you assume is a chef back at the palace. The island countertop is currently covered in them; onion, kimchi, marinated bulgogi, gochujang, cooked rice, eggs and more. 

You’re surprised at how skilled Jungkook is in the kitchen. He’s cutting the ingredients like he’s been doing it his whole life and working the pan over the stove like the proper technique has been drilled into him since birth. 

Thirty minutes pass, and after both of you shed a tear at the cut onions and evenly split the remaining tasks, you’re sitting on the couch about to take your first bite. It smells delicious. Your mouth is watering and you can’t wait to dig in, stomach painfully empty by this point.

Finally taking that first bite, you nearly die of euphoria.

“Ouhmahgaud,” you say, mouth half full. Jungkooks on the other side of the couch, trying not to cough out his own food from laughing at your reaction. His eyes are nearly shut with how wide he’s smiling.

“Good?” he asks after swallowing his food first, like a civilized person.

You’re vigorously nodding as you swallow your own helping in hopes you’re understood.

“You’re giving me this recipe. I need it. I don’t think I will survive if this is the only time I ever get to eat it.” Your bowl is almost half gone already. Thank god there’s leftovers, you will be having more.

Plus, you want to make it for your mom when you go home, she’ll love it. 

“I’ll text it to you later, don’t worry.”

You’re very sure the look on your face conveys the gratitude you feel and the rest of the meal passes in a very comfortable and satisfied silence. 

Twenty-ish minutes later, after letting your seconds settle for a couple minutes, Jungkook gets back to business. 

“Next look is the most adventurous, it uses the facepaint. Are you okay with contacts?”

“I think so, never tried them before though. Just give me a few before we start so I don’t explode when I stand up.”

“All good,” he says, before quirking a lip and adding, “I really don’t feel like explaining why there’s kimchi and bits of you all over my walls to either of our parents, so take all the time you need.”

You laugh, firstly at the visual, then at the idea of Jungkook meeting your mother. That would be something you needed on record, paper and film.

After a minute, you get up, the guest room making your acquaintance once more. 

“This one is called Enigmatic,” Jungkook calls.

“Got it!”

You take longer than normal to change, maybe eating before putting on the skin tight shirt wasn’t a great idea. But at least it was stretchy. 

It has long sleeves, a high neck, and is a very dark midnight black. There’s a matching black scarf for this one too, and a safety pin attached to the corner.

“Okay, what's the plan for this one? I hear facepaint is involved,” you say, back for round three, scarf in hand.

The background of the set is black now, a close match to your shirt. Jungkook is by the smoke machine, currently set up on the stool and plugged into a nearby outlet. 

You hold up the scarf, questioningly.

“That’s to go over your head after the paint, but let’s see if you can do contacts first, they’re in the washroom. Need help?”

“No, I'm good.”

You don’t succeed at first, but after a couple attempts you look in the mirror and see purple eyes staring back at you. You love them.

“I look like a badass,” you say, returning. The smoke machine’s been turned on and it’s created a completely different atmosphere. At your reemergence, Jungkook shuts it off and comes close to give you a look. You freeze a little at the eye contact, his browns meeting your currently violets for a prolonged moment.

“They look better than I’d hoped, this is going to be great.” 

He reaches under the gels on the table for a piece of paper. It’s a makeup model face with the look he wants drawn on. “Are you able to do something like this?”

The diagram shows the cheeks, bottom half of the nose and down all the way to the neck as black, and the eyes and up as white, bleeding down into the black like smoke. You’re going to need eyeshadow for that part. If you did that with the face paint it would just become a gray mess.

“Yep, but it’s going to take some time to get it right.”

“That’s okay, I’ll use it to get the smoke machine properly set up.”

You use one of the palette mirrors and start with the white, covering the top of your face and making a good base layer for the eyeshadow. Then fill the bottom of your face and neck with the black. Carefully, so as to not make gray, you use a large brush to cover both sides with their respective eyeshadow shades, before blending them together like the reference. Your skin starts to feel like it’s on fire by the time you're satisfied and you check your phone for the time when you finally finish. 

4:37pm. 

Not bad. You put the scarf over your head and cover your ears with it, using the safety pin to hold it in place. 

“Done.”

Jungkook takes one look at you and lights up. 

“Have I ever mentioned how talented you are, and that you make my schoolwork so much more fun? Because I feel like I should again even if I already have.” Your cheeks heat, glad he’s excited you’re able to help. “How did you manage to make it look even better?”

“I do vaguely remember mentioning something about a deal with a semi-suspicious genie,” you joke. And both of you break out in giggle fits after a second, recalling the conversation from forever ago. 

Running through the same steps of lighting, posing, and adjustments, Jungkook then flips on the smoke machine and lets it fill the room heavily before starting to take pictures. 

You’re sitting on a small box this time, so that you’re slightly lower than the camera. Jungkook tells you to keep your hands at your sides and look up, just above the rim of the camera lens. It creates a very interesting look, and you're excited to see the results. 

He has you do a couple more poses before allowing you to do your own thing once more, trying to think of what would look mysterious and enigmatic.

You try to let the music inspire you. This is a look you’ve never done before, so you’re finding it a bit difficult to get into it despite Jungkook's helpful prompts and suggestions. But you flow a bit better with it as time goes on and you become more comfortable.

An idea pops up out of nowhere and you have him do a close up from the middle of your chin to the middle of your forehead. You stare straight into the lens to really showcase the purple contacts and makeup.

“This’s the one for sure,” he says, taking a few more. “Great idea, why didn’t I think of a close up in the first place?” You know he's talking to himself at this point. 

It’s close to 6:15pm when Jungkook decides he has enough pictures for this look. You don’t mind the longer shoot seeing as you set aside the day for this, and you can’t wait to see how these ones turn out in particular.  

You’re halfway through getting the face paint off, a mountain of gray stained cotton pads beside you, when Jungkook turns the music down.

“Let’s do a light, early dinner and then shoot the last one?” he asks. “I kept this one at the end because it’s going to create the most mess and it’ll be nice to have dinner out of the way for when I have to clean up.”

“More mess than this?” you point to the cotton pad mountain.

“Much more.”

“Light, early dinner it is,” you confirm, not wanting to have to wait till late to eat. “But can we order out so I have time to get the rest of this off?”

“Sure, what’ll it be?”

Clean faced, moisturized and ramyeon filled, you and Jungkook are preparing for the last shoot. Or well, lightly arguing.

“Water?”

“Mhm.”

“On me?”

“Yep.”

“From that thing,” you point to the contraption he calls a c-stand that will be holding the very full, very large watering can over your head for an extended amount of time, “And into there?” you point again to the kitty pool on top of the tarp that’s underneath the watering can c-stand. 

“That is the plan,” he looks amused at your slight distress.

“Are you nuts? What if it falls on me? How do I know it won’t unhinge and I’ll have a nicely cracked open skull to explain to my mother on Solstice break?”

“It won’t fall and you know it won't because you trust me and trust I wouldn’t put you in unnecessary danger. But if it does, tell your mom I say hi and sorry.”

You scoff at him, unbelievable. “So you admit there’s a bit of danger!”

Jungkook sighs, and looks to the ceiling. “Yes, YN. There is a touch of danger. But that’s only if, somehow, the c-stand I have triple safety checked, duct taped twice, and quadruple secured with four fifteen pound sandbags, decides that you deserve a watering can to the head.”

You side eye his tone. This wasn’t an unrealistic worry. But you do trust him. And trust he would never intentionally put you in any danger.

The trees are set up near the backdrop that looks like a row of brick houses. The shot is supposed to be ‘The Calm after Before the Storm,’ where you look relieved and happy in an ‘outside’ setting while ‘rain’ falls over you, also in black and white.

“Fine, but if I hear one peep from that thing,” c-stand staring down the tip of your finger once more, “I’m tuck and rolling and taking you out while I do it.”

“Very fair!” he says relieved, and goes to set up the stand with the watering can. 

You’d changed into the neutral V neck after dinner, and he’s asked for no makeup. So all you have to do now is stand and pose while trying not to die from foreign objects falling from the sky while you get wet.

Easy, right?

Wrong.

It is incredibly difficult, and you’re glad he made this one last because you’re at best; slightly miserable. Only the promise of a hot shower, hot chocolate with whip cream and marshmallows and your pick of whatever you watch afterward is keeping you going.

You started this one just shy of 8pm after waiting 45 minutes for the food. And it’s nearing 9:30 now. Jungkook has had to refill the watering can four times, dump the kiddie pool twice,  and you swear if you don’t finish within the next twenty minutes, you’re going to collapse from shivering.

To be fair, he does fill the watering can with warm water, but it only stays warm for so long before freezing water is pouring on you for the millionth time tonight. 

“I have one last idea, and by the way, I’m never doing this concept again so don’t worry about that, but also… don’t shut down the idea immediately okay?” Jungkook says. 

The watering can is almost empty again and you’re relieved that your time is almost up. That in itself should make for a good picture. He snaps it.

But his tone makes you a little wary, “Okay… what is it?”

“Pretend I’m Nel and you’re seeing me for the first time in six months, like you do at the end of April.”

Well, you didn’t have that down on your photo shoot prompt bingo card. 

Are you okay with the idea? You aren’t sure, but aren’t not sure either.

“I mean, I’ll try. Maybe you could give vocal cues to try and help? But don’t make it weird.”

“I won’t, promise,” Jungkook pauses for a second before adding, “Does he call you baby?”

You nod, and you distantly hear and ‘okay’ as you slowly allow yourself to get into that headspace.

You start, and the camera starts going.

You’re in the airport, waiting for Nel, ‘smoosh’ paper in hand. The gate opens, and through all the other passengers you see him, see that he’s in one piece, see that he’s safe. 

Your face illuminates with relief at that so much so that you don’t even notice the water that starts running down your face. 

You hear a ‘hi baby’ and in your head, it’s coming from Nel’s mouth as he nears you. You smile impossibly wider at the thought of seeing him, feeling him. Having him here with you. 

You look happy to see me, ‘Nel’ says.

“I am,” you reply. 

There’s repetitive clicking in the distance, but you ignore it. It’s probably just a flight attendant's heels on the floor.

“I missed you.”

There’s a long moment of silence before Nel speaks again.

I missed you too, baby.

You’re shivering hard now, lost in thought, unaware of reality. 

YN, Nel calls.

“Yes, love?”

“YN.”

“Babe, what is it?”

“YN, hey,” you're being shaken gently.

“Hmm? What?” you slowly arrive back to the present. Strong hands grip your shoulders. They feel nice. Solid. Deliciously warm. 

A very concerned looking Jungkook comes into focus, camera dangling around his neck and reaching for you.

Oh.

He’s the one holding your shoulders, trying to get you to come back to reality.

“There she is, welcome back,” he lets go and grabs a blanket from somewhere and wraps it around you. “We got the shot, go take a shower and warm up okay?”

“Okay,” you say, still a little dazed, but present enough to function.

You step out of the pool, holding on to the hand Jungkook offers to balance—Warm. Solid. Strong—and head straight for the bathroom, making a pit stop in the guest room to grab your bag with fresh clothes. 

The hot water cements your place back in reality, letting it warm you up and cleanse you of the day. 

You have no idea what just happened with that whole Nel thing, but it was a new feeling and a new headspace and you really aren’t in the mood to analyze or acknowledge, so it’s shoved onto a top shelf in the back of your mind for a later date.  

Once you're able to return to the directory of your mind, you don’t know how long you’ve been in the shower. But you know you’re clean, no longer cold, and in the mood for hot chocolate, so you step out and dry yourself with the towels Jungkook laid out for you on the toilet seat.

They’re soft. So soft in fact you consider only for a second shoving one in your now less full bag to take home with you. However, you do rather enjoy your friendship with the prince, so you think better of it upon second thought. 

Dressing in your sweats, you exit, tossing the towels in the hamper and your bag of the clothes you arrived in back into the spare room.

“Better?” Jungkook asks as you sit down in your spot on the couch for the last time tonight, wrapping up in the blanket he left for you. He’s in the kitchen but heard you coming.

“Much, thanks,” you sniff, “Is that hot chocolate I smell?”

Jungkook returns from the kitchen, two mugs in hand. “With extra whip cream and marshmallows, as ordered.”

You carefully take it from him, giving your thanks and happily slurping away the second it’s in your grasp. 

“Alright Caravaggio, what are we watching?” he asks, sitting down on his side, sipping away on his own. 

Sometime between you leaving for the shower and coming back out Jungkook changed into his own comfy attire, and tidied up the studio space as the pool and tarp are nowhere to be seen.

“I’ve thought really hard about this, all of however long I was in the shower,” Jungkook mutters something about 35 minutes; you ignore him, “And have settled on ‘A Miser Brothers Solstice’.”

He whines just a little when he says, “But it’s November.”

“So?”

“So, Solstice isn’t until the third week of December,” he’s saying this like his point is the most obvious thing in the world. 

It’s not.

“Your point?”

“That it’s November, and you want to watch a Solstice movie.”

You’re mockingly outraged.

“Who made you town grinch? I didn’t realize we had a holiday hater in our midst.” 

You loved the holidays, all the big ones, and the small ones, but Solstice was special. 

“I’m not a grinch, I’m just not there yet, mentally.”

“Then get ready to dive in head first, because you said I could pick the movie for risking my life for you and I pick ‘A Miser Brothers Solstice’.”

Jungkook doesn’t argue further, but he does roll his eyes as he puts on your movie with a small smile hidden behind his drink.

It’s sometime during the first act, you’re lying back against your corner of the couch, feet up and under the blanket when you ask, “What are your solstice break plans?” 

Jungkook takes a moment to part from the TV, very invested for someone who was so against it half an hour ago. “I have a lot of ‘princely duties’ to do for Solstice, like standing and looking thoughtful while my dad gives his annual Solstice speech,” you snort. “Then there’s the palace dinner, the parade through the capital, and the live televised event,” he says in a tv announcer's voice, “Where my family and I light the Solstice Star. And then there’s the new year and that in itself has another long list of things I have to do. Besides things like that though? Not much, and then it’s back here.”

Right.

You often forget who he is. 

That behind those kind eyes, and small smiles, behind the greenhouse study dates, and movie nights, and photoshoots, Jungkook has an enormous responsibility constantly looming over his head, counting down the days until he finishes his schooling. One that’s just waiting to drop onto his shoulders forever. 

You often forget that Jungkook is the Prince, first in line to the biggest throne in the realm. That you spend your time with not only Jeon Jungkook, friend and photography student, but also, His Royal Highness, Prince Jeon Jungkook, Heir Apparent and Future King of The Western Shores.

He just makes it so damn easy to forget.

You only asked because you thought maybe he had plans with friends or family, completely forgetting about all of the things the royal family does during the holiday season to celebrate with the nation, their people, and now you feel like an ass for even bringing it up.

But there’s something in his answer, or lack thereof, that snags your attention. 

“What about celebrating with your family and friends in private?”

“No time,” Jungkook’s stare goes distant as he brings his knees up and puts his arms around them, resting his chin. “Friends are always busy with palace preparations and dad’s not really the sentimental type. We celebrated when I was younger; big family breakfast, presents, tree decorating, whole thing. But after I turned about 13 or so, it started dwindling pretty quickly. Now it’s just me and my mom exchanging a gift with each other at midnight under the palace tree.” 

You don’t think you’ve ever heard something so heartbreaking yet beautiful in your life. 

“Your mum sounds wonderful, I’m really happy you two get that time together.” 

He looks at you, and you can tell by the look in his eyes he loves that time with her more than anything else. 

Solstice is supposed to be the time you spend with your family, blood or chosen. The time where you all gather to cook and bake, and exchange thoughtful gifts with the ones you love. The time where you truly cherish one another and count yourself lucky for all that you have. 

Solstice is your favourite time of the year.

To not spend it like that just seems…wrong. Horribly, painfully, awfully wrong.

“What about you?” he asks.

You don’t want to make him feel bad, so you tone down your answer, taking away the meat and giving the bones.

“My mum and I cut down our own tree and decorate it with the ornaments we’ve collected over the years,” you have them from every place you’ve ever visited, and your mum kept all the ones you ever made as a kid. You even get a new one every solstice to take a picture for and label with the year.  

“Then we bake solstice cookies until our hands cramp and survive off only them until solstice dinner; a turkey, honey glazed carrots, mashed potatoes with gravy, essentially if it waters your mouth, it’s there,” he chuckles at that. “We do gifts for each other too, opening them on solstice morning before making hot drinks and reading in the breakfast nook until the sun sets or till we get hungry, whichever comes first.”

Jungkook's eyes glow, radiating warmth, a lazy smile on his face as he listens to you. 

“That sounds really nice, YN.”

“It is,” you reply, looking him in those radiant eyes as you do. He looks… happy. Happy for you, that you get to have something like this that’s so special. It breaks your heart a little…maybe you can help.

“You wanna make some solstice cookies with me before break?”

His look of happy shifts to one of slight panic.

“What?” you question, and comically ask, “Have you never made solstice cookies before?”

He hesitates before answering a very quiet, “Uh…N-no.”

Your shock must be incredibly evident in the way he almost flinches at your reaction.

So you try your best to keep your voice level when you ask, “What do you mean, no?”

“I mean no. I’ve never made solstice cookies.”

That’s it. You can’t hold back any more, you’ve never heard anything so blasphemous in all your life.

“You’ve never what?  How is that even possible?”

He shrinks into himself a little more.

“The palace pastry chef always makes them because that’s kind of his job,” you stare at him in disbelief. “Is this really that big a deal?”

You swear there’s cog’s and smoke flying out of your ears. Solstice cookies are a religion in your household. You know dozens of recipes by heart, always finding a new one each year to try and up your game. You cannot imagine a solstice without making them. Wait no, actually you can, but it would be because you’re dead.

You held back in your answer earlier, for his sake, but you and your mom’s hands cramp up because you make enough cookies to give a box to everyone in the neighborhood. It’s one of your favourite traditions, and your neighbours even look forward to it every year, going so far as sending you both recipes to try out.

“Big dea—you’ve never fucking mad—not even when you were little? No one brought you to the kitchen and let you help? Aren't all your friends back home the pastry chefs' kids or something?” You don’t mean to sound harsh, but your tone is a little more passionate than you were intending. 

But Jungkook knows you, knows you occasionally get that passionate about things, and takes your outburst in stride. 

“Yeah, one of them is, but we don't sit around the oven and make cookies all break long. And his dad is always too busy to teach us even if we wanted to.”

You decide something. Right then and there.

“This year you are.”

“What?”

“Mark your last Saturday off because I'm going to show up here, ingredients-a-plenty and teach you how to make solstice cookies. I have a million recipes up here,” you tap your head with a finger, “But I'll choose the easiest ones. And I’ll come over early so we can spend the day making all of them. I can’t in good conscience leave for the break knowing you’ve never made them.”

He sighs. “Do I have any say in the matter?”

“Absolutely not.”

Jungkook stares at you and you can’t figure out what he’s thinking. You’re worried he’s going to say no anyway. To say you’re crazy and that they’re just cookies and that he has more important things he has to do on his Saturday before leaving for home.

But he doesn’t. And you should’ve known he wouldn’t, not after all the time you’ve spent together. 

You know better. Know him better.

“Alright Picasso. Sounds like a plan. I’m looking forward to it,” he decides, and goes back to watching the movie. 

It’s the first time he’s ever repeated a nickname.

“Wait! The wind guy wants to replace who?!” Jungkook shouts. 

You laugh at his confusion, and rewind the movie.

Jungkook wakes up sore.

His back is killing him, which makes sense since he’s half lying on the couch, half on the ground. 

The TV’s silently playing some slideshow of movie recommendations based on recent watches. 

He checks his phone, reaching for it on the coffee tale. 

14% battery. 

4:07am. 

Shit, he fell asleep. 

After the solstice movie he wanted to watch its predecessor. You had no qualms and so on it went, but he doesn’t remember much after the brothers started fighting.

Hearing soft, even breathing next to him he turns to see you, hunched over in your spot asleep, no doubt in the process of ruining your own back.

He should go to bed.

You should go to bed. 

But you’ve never stayed the night.

What should he do? Should he wake you? 

But you look so peaceful. And it’s nearing exams. You barely sleep when it’s exams season. 

Instead, Jungkook goes to check the guest room, but it’s a mess with yesterday's comings and goings. Make-up and clothes and hangers strewn everywhere.

Quietly, making a decision he hopes you won’t kill him for in the morning, he pads back to your sleeping form. 

It’s for your back, he tells himself. No other reason.

Deja vu sets in as he scoops you up from the couch, blanket and all. Just like last time, you gain enough consciousness to know to wrap your arms around his neck, but not enough to wake up. Your head rests on his shoulder and he selfishly savours the feeling as he walks down the short hallway to his room.  

Jungkook sets you down gently on one side of the bed, and your arms release, slumber undisturbed as he tucks you in.

He goes back to the living room to retrieve your phones. Yours is still at 56%, and he places it on the table beside you when he returns.

Climbing into his side of the bed, he’s careful not to touch you.

Though he wants to. 

Desperately. 

His sleep deprived brain is too slow to block out the thoughts that start to race. Thoughts of how he wants to turn around and pull you into his chest, slide an arm around your waist, and kiss you goodnight. How he wants to wake up in the same position, you still in his arms. 

But he’s also awake enough to know that will never happen. That you’re with Nel, and happy with him. That he’s drawn that nice, big line.

He’s awake enough to know you being in his bed is a fluke, unintentional.

A one time thing.

Plugging his phone into its charger, he sets it down on his own bedside table and pulls the covers up, falling back asleep.

His back facing you. 

An exhale wakes you.

Warm and cozy, you take a deep breath and roll to your left side, stretching on the way over. The scents of clean linen and something familiar find you. It’s comforting, that smell, but you can’t place it.

Another exhale, but this time you feel it as well as hear it.

You open your eyes to see a sleeping Jungkook face not a foot from your own and you jolt in shock, falling off the bed in the process. 

You look up from your new seat on the floor, ignoring the pain in your side from landing, and peer over the covers to check on Jungkook, who, miraculously, hasn’t woken up from your tumble. 

Relieved, your mind focuses on more pressing questions like ‘how did you get here?’ And ‘why were you in his bed?’ 

The last thing you remember was being halfway through the prequel to A Miser Brothers Solstice on the couch, watching Jungkook more than the movie because of how invested he’d become in the story. 

But you aren’t on the couch now. You were in his bed. 

The bed of the Prince of the Western Shores. 

The Prince who has a girlfriend, and you, who has a very long term, very serious boyfriend.

You hear a vibration, and following the sound, you find your phone on the bedside table. 

You quickly grab it quickly and go to the living room as quietly as you can manage. 

There’s a large number of unread texts. 

SlurryYuri [11:08pm]: hey, just checking in. You didn’t get home when you said you’d try for SlurryYuri [11:31pm]: Helloooooooo? YN? You there? SlurryYuri [12:14am]: it’s getting late YN, when are you coming home? Are you on your way?

Missed Calls: (3)

SlurryYuri [2:43am]: it’s been hours, so you better be dead or have crashed in the school somewhere. Either way I’m kicking your ass when you get home

Missed Calls: (2)

(Recent)

SlurryYuri [9:36am]: you’re still not home?? YN seriously, where are you SlurryYuri [10:23am]: If you don’t message me back in an hour I’m calling the police and filing a missing persons

Shit. 

Shit, shit, shit, shit, shit. You crashed hard, the shoot must have taken more out of you than you thought, so you never texted Yuri you were going to crash in a sleep pod at school like you’d planned too. 

You make quick work of messaging her back, glad she unintentionally gave you just the excuse you needed. 

YN [10:25am]: ohmygod I’m soooooo sorry, it was the school one. I fell asleep in the school. I’m sorry for worrying you. I’ll be home soon, promise. I’m just going to grab breakfast first. Again im sorry

SlurryYuri [10:27am]: thank the gods youre okay!! Don’t ever do that to me again YN! I don’t wanna be the one who has to break news to your mom!! She’s too nice.  SlurryYuri [10:27am]: and take your time getting back if your rushing for me, I’m not at the dorm SlurryYuri [10:27am]: Tai showed up yesterday out of the blue and took me dancing. We’re out getting brunch right now, and he has plans for the rest of the day SlurryYuri [10:28am]: Im just glad you’re not dead in a ditch somewhere

YN [10:29am]: me too, and okay I will. Thanks for checking up on me and making sure im safe, youre my favourite

SlurryYuri [10:30am]: damn right I am, see you tn <3

YN [10:30am]: see you <3

You exhale deeply, that was fucking close. 

Your stomach rumbles and it reminds you that you actually need to get breakfast. 

What could you have? You could order in again, but that means a wait time and you are hungry now. You could raid Jungkook's pantry, or see if he has any fruit, but then you think that’s a gross invasion of privacy when it’s not movie night and you haven’t asked if it’s okay. 

Wait.

The egg tarts!

You dash to the fridge, the marvellous sight of a greenhouse inside a coffee mug comes into view. Stuffing one down before you even get the box from the fridge, you exit the kitchen, sit down on the couch, setting the box on the coffee table. Once opened in front of you, you realize there is a healthy amount of tarts inside. 

How many did Jungkook ask for?

Speaking of, a bed-headed, yawning Jungkook makes his morning debut, still in last night's clothes.

“Hey,” he says groggily, walking over and stealing a tart.

“Hey!” you say back, not nearly as friendly. 

“Overnight tax, Picasso. Room isn’t free.” He chuckles at your faux outrage, popping half the tart in his mouth as he walks to the kitchen and grabs something from the fridge. Returning, you see it’s a morning protein shake. 

Gross. 

“So is that name the one you’re sticking to now?” you ask, picking up another tart. At this rate they won’t last until lunch.

“Yeah, that okay with you? It’s your name in my phone after all.”

“It is?” You didn’t know that.

“Yeah, has been since the start.” 

You’re quickly learning that sleepy morning Jungkook is very different from morning post work-out Jungkook, friend Jungkook and photographer Jungkook. His voice is deeper, he’s a lot more relaxed, and maybe even harmlessly borderline flirty, like he’s not all there yet. Softer. 

“Picasso’s just fine. A compliment really.”

“Oh? And what am I in your’s then? Hopefully something just as nice?”

You tell him like it is.

“PJK.”

“PJK?” he asks, incredulous.

“Yeah? It’s obscure enough to not be recognizable if someone were to see it, but enough for me to know who it is.”

“Nah, you need something better, PJK is boring.”

“It’s your initials.”

“And boring,” he’s really not letting up on this. 

“Well...what would you save yourself as?”

He mulls it over for a minute before deflating. “Okay, fair point, but I seriously want a new one. Something that can rival Picasso.”

“Do you have any nicknames? Something not completely obvious?”

For a morning person, Jungkook sure is taking his time. Maybe he was only a morning person before 8am, and then if he got up anytime after that he became a normal person who despised mornings like everyone else.

“Uhh…Vivian calls me JK, but that’s essentially the same thing as PJK. My buddies back home sometimes call me Kook, but I don’t think that works either. My mum has one for me that I will not disclose to anyone so long as I am breathing. So I guess not.”

A lightbulb dings over your head. “What about your security? Don’t they have special code names for you when they detail you? Like bear or eagle?” 

“Yeah, but it’s not nearly as badass as either of those.”

“Fess up,” you say. Now you have to know.

“Hare.”

“Hare?” Now it’s your turn to be incredulous. “Like a rabbit?”

“Yep.”

An idea pops into your head and an evil grin spreads across your face, one you know is already setting worry into Jungkook’s still awakening brain as you change his name.

“I don’t like that look,” he confirms. “What’d you change it to?”

You flip your phone around and hold it up to him.

“Bunny?” he says incredulously once again.

“Yes.”

“I give you Picasso, one of the greatest painters of all time, and you think giving me bunny is anywhere near on par with that?”

Teasing him is far too fun, especially when he makes it this easy for you.

“Oh absolutely. In fact, I think it’s the best name I could possibly set it as.”

Jungkook disagrees, vehemently. “No, change it back. PJK is fine.”

“Too late. You dug your grave, now lie in it.”

Jungkook brings a hand to his face, pinching the crease between his brows and takes a very long, deep breath, exhaling just as dramatically. 

You take that as your victory. But you’re sorely mistaken.

He launches at you, reaching for your phone and you scream, reaching your arm to keep it away from him. You have a fox socked foot on his chest to try and keep him back. His right arm is holding him up near your hip on the couches edge and he’s reaching with his left as far as he can without breaking his sternum on your heel. 

“Give it!”

“Never!”

You try to bring up your other foot to push him away, but Jungkook is strong, and forces both it and the one on his chest down with the arm that was supporting him, temporarily keeping himself up with his left hand on the back of the couch. 

With your legs out of the way he can almost reach his phone. But in his distracted state, misses the couch when he goes to put his supporting arm down again, and flips onto the ground, taking you with him. You scream, but his arms wrap around you as he makes sure to take the brunt of the impact, landing on his back, you safely secured to his chest. 

There’s a moment of pure stunned silence, you resting your forhead on his chest while you process, him not letting go of your waist as he gets a breath into his winded self, before you’re both laughing as you take in what happened.

“You okay?” he asks.

“Yeah, you?”

He takes a second to respond. “I’m great.” 

You push to sit up, and he releases you from his hold, but that was a mistake. Because now you’re sitting on his lap. 

It takes an entire three seconds of you staring at him and him staring right back before you jump and scramble off him as fast as you can. 

“Sorry.” you say in unison, you standing and him from the ground. It’s a painfully awkward 8 seconds before you break, cackling at the whole situation, and he joins in with you again. 

Jungkook brushes off his pants as he gets up too. “Got any plans before tonight,” he asks, business as usual.

“Nope, cleared my schedule in case this went long, I’ve got the whole day.”

You swear his smile grows two sizes.

“Well in that case,” he looks to the TV, then back to you, “Wanna start movie night early?”

An entire day to relax and chill out before the hell that is exams season takes your every free second? 

Yes please.

“Solstice movie marathon?” you propose slyly, near devious.

“I’ll get the popcorn,” he confirms, already halfway to the kitchen.

You spend the day like that, on the couch watching movie after movie, both pretending the little incident never even happened. 

But you make sure to go home after movie night this time. 

Chapter Nine: Sugar Cookies and Devious Confessions

A/N 2: This chapter kicked my ass but it's here and I couldn't be more thrilled. I really like how it's ended so I hope you guys do too.

A/N 3: As always, Thank you for reading, loves. Xoxo - Yoon <3

<- Back

[notedchampagne]

currently in a 3-woman yuri situation there's like a fucking crush triangle happening there's flirting that none of us know when is genuine WHAT DO I DO?????

(been seeing what advice the online lesbians give)

youve come to the right person im the best guy to talk to about romance. my advice:

amp up the flirting until you feel like youre on three different drugs and overwhelmed with giddiness. this will be the best time of your life

make jokes* about all of you living together in one house to fullfill the lesbian poly commune

* its not really a joke is it? haha

keep doing this until someone -not you- breaks and confesses.

unless you have the gall to confess first, which in that case make sure theyre both free at a certain time and then create another group chat to confess to them both. god bless

A QUICK SAMPLE OF MY LIST OF CREDENTIALS PROVING MY EXPERTISE:

[p1x1x]

would you fw kou × shirahime? just curious cuz I think it's like. the only healthy relationship in arcaea and you seem to talk about & draw toxic doomed arcaea yuri a lot haha

haha i wouldn’t say i fw them bc admittedly they dont take up much of my brain space, but they are a cute ship! their meeting was adorable hfhdhd

ok this got long so im putting all this shit under the cut 😭

but for me to go crazy about a ship it needs to have cute, angst, and freak in it… kou/shirahime really only have the cute aspect, which isnt enough substance for me bc i am an angst freak 😔😔 the most i could think of for angst is like. them never seeing each other again but thats not really the type of angst i like i guess 🤔 love yearning in yuri but hmm… its probably also bc i dont imagine they’ll be angsty like that. they have a belief they’ll see each other again, and given their personality, they’ll probably stick to that belief! very hopeful, do hope they meet each other again … they r cute : P …

the other “healthy” yuri that exists in arcaea i would say i fw a bit is mir/shirabe… they got the cute, but they also have the slightest bit of codependency to me… mainly on mir’s side. yk, seeing herself as a sword and shield, a protector (a tool)… the way shirabe’s the one to help her keep going… and i like the aspect of shirabe waiting for her every time. i think there should be art of mir resting her head on shirabe’s lap…

mir would probably be direct in thanking shirabe, for still waiting for her, which would make shirabe blush haha. she’ll probably say something about keeping her word. pushing a strand of hair out of mir’s face, tucking it behind her ear… shirabe’s probably humming at some point while mir falls asleep…

(think it’d be fun to play with just shirabe getting summoned… even more fun if mir just wakes up alone in the white sand… there’s not much sense of time passing, and she’s never experienced the waiting that shirabe does, and its kind of terrifying how quiet it is again… if she werent asleep, maybe she’d have been able to do something about the summoning… a tool shouldnt need to sleep anyway …idk but that’s just me wanting angst)

but yeah … cute yuri is great, im just… soooo hungry for misery guilt freak stuff … ltsy had the 3 things, but 6/8 amps everything up lol so i became severely deceased about them … hikaritsu also got things but i like their story as is :^)

(skmy also has these things a little bit… cute and angst is mainly towards maya though haha… maybe even vtsy? but theyre largely one sided bc lethe is jdhdgdgdhddgdhd… saya’s totally gay for lethe… but i do just really like messed up yuri . and fictional girls crying. i loveee looking at what makes em miserable and feel terrible and guilty hahaha i think ive said this like 5 times before)

6/8 has the freakiest potential by far... so ,,,

but yk maybe i’ll draw the other ships one day!!! gotta keep up the arcaeayuri…

[shuxiii]

The End.

Hanni Pham x reader pt1, pt2, pt3, pt4, pt5, pt6, pt7, pt8, pt9, pt10, pt11, pt12, pt13, pt14, pt15, pt16, pt17, pt18, pt19, pt20

A/n So this is it, the verdict. I had a lot fun converting this novel, and I appreciate everyone who read it and took their time reading it. Mwa mwa credits "every day" by david levithan.

Day 6033

I wake up the next morning as Jang wonyoung. Her alarm goes off, playing a song I really like. This makes waking up much easier.

I also like her room. Plenty of books on the shelves, some of their spines worn down from rereading. There are three guitars in the corner, one electric, the amp still plugged in from the night before. In another corner, there’s a lime-green couch, and I know immediately this is a place where friends come to crash, this is their home away from home. She has Post-its all over the place with random quotes on them. On top of her computer is something from George Bernard Shaw: Dance is the perpendicular expression of a horizontal desire. Some of the Post-its are in her handwriting, but others have been written by friends. I am the walrus. I’m nobody—who are you? Let all the dreamers wake the nation.

Even before I’ve gotten to know her, Jang Wonyoung has made me smile.

Her parents are happy to see her. I have a sense that they’re always happy to see her.

“Are you sure you’re going to be okay for the weekend?” her mother asks. Then she opens the refrigerator, which looks like it’s been stocked for at least a month. “I think there’s enough here, but if you need anything, just use the money in the envelope.”

I feel something is missing here; there is something I should be doing. I access and discover it’s the Jangs’ anniversary tomorrow. They are going on an anniversary trip. And Wonyoung’s gift for them is up in her room.

“One second,” I say. I run upstairs and find it in her closet—a bag festooned with Post-its, each of them filled in with something her parents have said to her over the years, from A is for Apple to Always remember to check your blind spot. And this is just the wrapping. When I bring the bag down to Mr. and Mrs. Jang, they open it to find ten hours of music for their ten-hour drive, as well as cookies Wongyoung has baked for them.

Wonyoung’s father wraps her in a thankful hug, and Wonyoung's mother joins in.

For a moment, I forget who I really am.

Wonyoung’s locker is also covered in Post-it quotes, in a rainbow of handwritings. Her best friend, Yuri, comes by and offers her half a muffin—the bottom half, because Yuri only likes the tops.

Yuri starts telling me about Yena, a girl she’s apparently had a crush on for ages—ages meaning at least three weeks. I feel the perverse desire to tell Yuri about Hanni, who is only two towns away. I access and find that Wonyoung doesn’t have any crushes herself at the moment. Yuri doesn’t pry too much about this. And quickly other friends find them, and the talk turns to an upcoming Battle of the Bands. Apparently, Wonyoung is playing in at least three of the entrants, including Yuri’s band. She’s that kind of girl, always willing to chip in with some music.

As the day progresses, I can’t help but feel that Wonyoung is the kind of person I try to be. But part of what makes her personality work is her ability to stick around, to be there day in and day out for people. Her friends rely on her, and she relies on them—the simple balance on which so many lives are built.

I decide to make sure that this is true. I zone out of math class and tune in instead to Wonyoung’s memories. The way I access her, it’s like turning on a hundred televisions at the same time, I’m seeing so many parts of her at once. The good memories. The hard memories.

Her father doesn’t want her to spend so much time on the guitar, tells her music is a dead-end calling. She drinks her third can of Red Bull, trying to finish a paper at four in the morning because she was out with friends until one. She is climbing the ladder of a tree house. She is failing her driver’s test and fighting back tears when the instructor tells her. She is alone in her room, playing the same tune over and over again on an acoustic guitar, trying to figure out what it means. She is on a swing set, six years old, going higher and higher until she is convinced this is it, this is the time she will fly. She is slipping money into Yuri’s wallet while Yuri isn’t looking, so later on Yuri will be able to pay her share of the check. She is dressed as the Tin Man on Halloween. Her mother has burned her hand on the stove and she doesn’t know what to do. The first morning she has her license, she drives to the ocean to watch the sunrise. She is the only one there.

I stop there. I stop at this. I lurch back into myself. I don’t know if I can do this.

I can’t block out the temptation that Poole offered: If I could stay in this life, would I? Every time I pose the question to myself, I get knocked back into my own life from Wonyoung’s. I get ideas, and once they take hold, I can’t stop them.

What if there really was a way to stay?

Every person is a possibility. The hopeless romantics feel it most acutely, but even for others, the only way to keep going is to see every person as a possibility. The more I see the Wonyoung that the world reflects back at her, the more of a possibility she seems. Her possibility is grounded in the things that mean the most to me. Kindness. Creativity. Engagement in the world. Engagement in the possibilities of the people around her.

The day is nearly half over. I only have a short time to figure out what to do with Wonyoung’s possibilities.

The clock always ticks. There are times you don’t hear it, and there are times that you do.

I email Haruto and ask him for Poole’s email address. I get a quick response. I email Poole a few simple questions.

I get another quick response.

I email Hanni and tell her I’m going to come by this afternoon.

I say it’s important.

She tells me she’ll be there.

Wonyoung has to tell Yuri that she can’t make their band practice after school.

“Hot date?” Yuri asks, joking.

Wonyoung smiles mischievously and leaves it at that.

Hanni is waiting for me at the bookstore. It’s become our place.

She knows me when I walk through the door. Her eyes follow me as I come closer. She doesn’t smile, but I do. I am so grateful to see her.

“Hey,” I say.

“Hey,” she says.

She wants to be here, but she doesn’t think it’s a good idea. She is also grateful, but she is sure this gratitude will turn into regret.

“I have an idea,” I tell her.

“What?”

“Let’s pretend this is the first time we’ve ever met. Let’s pretend you were here to get a book, and I happened to bump into you. We struck up a conversation. I like you. You like me. Now we’re sitting down to coffee. It feels right. You don’t know that I switch bodies every day. I don’t know about your ex or anything else. We’re just two people meeting for the first time.”

“But why?”

“So we don’t have to talk about everything else. So we can just be with each other. Enjoy it.”

“I don’t see the point—”

“No past. No future. Just present. Give it a chance.”

She looks torn. She leans her chin on her fist and looks at me. Finally, she decides.

“It’s very nice to meet you,” she says. She doesn’t understand it yet, but she’s going to go with it.

I smile. “It’s very nice to meet you, as well. Where should we go?”

“You decide,” she says. “What’s your favorite place?”

I access Wonyoung, and the answer is right there. As if she’s handing it to me.

My smile grows wider.

“I know just the place,” I say. “But first we’ll need groceries.”

Because this is the first time we’ve met, I don’t have to tell her about Haruto or Poole or anything else that’s happened or about to happen. The past and future are what’s complicated. It’s the present that’s simple. And that simplicity is the sensation of it being just her and me.

Even though there are only a few things we need, we get a shopping cart and go down every aisle of the grocery store. It doesn’t take long before Hanni is standing on the front of it, I’m standing on the back of it, and we are riding as fast as we can.

We set down a rule: Every aisle has to have a story. So in the pet-food aisle, I learn more about Swizzle, the malevolent bunny rabbit. In the produce aisle, I tell her about the day I went to summer camp and had to be part of a greased-watermelon pull, and how I ended up with three stitches after the watermelon shot out of everyone’s arms and landed in my eye—the first case of watermelon abuse the hospital had ever seen. In the cereal aisle, we offer autobiographies in the form of the cereals we’ve eaten over the years, trying to pinpoint the year that the cereal turning the milk blue stopped being cool and started being gross.

Finally, we have enough food for a vegetarian feast.

“I should call my mom and tell her I’m eating at Yeeun’s,” Hanni says, taking out her phone.

“Tell her you’re staying over,” I suggest.

She pauses. “Really?”

“Really.”

But she doesn’t make a move to call.

“I’m not sure that’s a good idea.”

“Trust me,” I say. “I know what I’m doing.”

“You know how I feel.”

“I do. But still, I want you to trust me. I’m not going to hurt you. I will never hurt you.”

She calls her mother, tells her she’s at Yeeun’s. Then she calls Yeeun and makes sure the cover story will be intact. Yeeun asks her what’s going on. Hanni says she’ll tell her later.

“You’ll tell her you met a girl,” I say once she’s hung up.

“A girl I just met?”

“Yeah,” I say. “A girl you’ve just met.”

We go back to Wonyoung’s house. There’s barely enough room in the refrigerator for the groceries we’ve bought.

“Why did we bother?” Hanni asks.

“Because I didn’t notice what was in here this morning. And I wanted to make sure we had exactly what we desired.”

“Do you know how to cook?”

“Not really. You?”

“Not really.”

“I guess we’ll figure it out. But first, there’s something I want to show you.”

She likes Wonyoung’s bedroom as much as I do. I can tell. She loses herself in reading the Post-it notes, then runs her finger over the spines of the books. Her face is a picture of delight.

Then she turns to me, and the fact can’t be denied: We’re in a bedroom, and there’s a bed. But that’s not why I brought her here.

“Time for dinner,” I say. Then I take her hand and we walk away together.

We fill the air with music as we cook. We move in unison, move in tandem. We’ve never done this together before, but we establish our rhythm, our division of labor. I can’t help but think this is the way it could always be—the easygoing sharing of space, the enjoyable silence of knowing each other. My parents are away, and my girlfriend has come over to help cook dinner. There she is, chopping vegetables, unaware of her posture, unaware of the wildness of her hair, even unaware that I am staring at her with so much love. Outside our kitchen-size bubble, the nighttime sings. I can see it through the window, and also see her reflection mapped out on top of it. Everything is in its right place, and my heart wants to believe this can always be true. My heart wants to make it true, even as something darker tugs it away.

It’s past nine by the time we’re finished.

“Should I set the table?” Hanni asks, gesturing to the dining room.

“No. I’m taking you to my favorite place, remember?”

I find two trays and arrange our meals on them. I even find a dozen candlesticks to take along. Then I lead Hanni out the back door.

“Where are we going?” she asks once we’re in the yard.

“Look up,” I tell her.

At first she doesn’t see it—the only light is coming from the kitchen, drifting out to us like the afterglow from another world. Then, as our eyes adjust, it becomes visible to her.

“Nice,” she says, walking over so that Wonyoung’s tree house looms over us, the ladder at our fingertips.

“There’s a pulley system,” I say, “for the trays. I’ll go up and drop it down.”

I grab two of the candles and scurry up the ladder. The inside of the tree house matches Wonyoung’s memories pretty well. It’s as much a rehearsal space as a tree house, with another guitar in the corner, as well as notebooks full of lyrics and music. Even though there’s an overhead light that could be turned on, I rely on candles. Then I send down the dumbwaiter and raise the trays one by one. As soon as the second tray is safely inside, Hanni joins me.

“Pretty cool, isn’t it?” I ask as she looks around.

“Yeah.”

“It’s all her. Her parents don’t come up here.”

“I love it.”

There isn’t any table and there aren’t any chairs, so we sit cross-legged on the floor and eat, facing each other in the candlelight. We don’t rush it—we let the taste of the moment sink in. I light more candles, and revel in the sight of her. We don’t need the moon or the sun in here. She is beautiful in our own light.

“What?” she asks.

I lean over and kiss her. Just once.

“That,” I say.

She is my first and only love. Most people know that their first love will not be their only love. But for me, she is both. This will be the only chance I give myself. This will never happen again.

There are no clocks in here, but I am aware of the minutes, aware of the hours. Even the candles conspire, getting shorter as time grows shorter. Reminding me and reminding me and reminding me.

I want this to be the first time we’ve met. I want this to be two teenagers on a first date. I want to already be planning the second date in my head. And the third.

But there are other things I have to say, other things I have to do.

When we’re finished, she pushes the trays aside. She closes the distance between us. I think she’s going to kiss me, but instead she reaches into her pocket. She pulls out one of Wonyoung’s pads of Post-it notes. She pulls out a pen. Then she draws a heart on the top Post-it, peels it off, and places it on my heart.

“There,” she says.

I look down at it. I look up at her.

“I have to tell you something,” I say.

I mean I have to tell her everything.

I tell her about Haruto I tell her about Poole. I tell her I might not be the only one. I tell her there might be a way to stay in a body longer. There might be a way not to leave.

The candles are burning down. I am taking too much time. It’s almost eleven when I’m done.

“So you can stay?” she asks when I’m finished. “Are you saying you can stay?”

“Yes,” I answer. “And no.”

When first love ends, most people eventually know there will be more to come. They are not through with love. Love is not through with them. It will never be the same as the first, but it will be better in different ways.

I have no such consolation. This is why I cling so hard. This is why this is so hard.

“There might be a way to stay,” I tell her. “But I can’t. I’ll never be able to stay.”

Murder. When it all comes down to it, it would be murder to stay. No love can outbalance that.

Hanni pulls away from me. Stands up. Turns on me.

“You can’t do this!” she yells. “You can’t swoop in, bring me here, give me all this—and then say it can’t work. That’s cruel, Yn. Cruel.”

“I know,” I say. “That’s why this is a first date. That’s why this is the first time we’ve ever met.”

“How can you say that? How can you erase everything else?”

I stand up. Walk over. Wrap my arms around her. At first she resists, wants to pull away. But then she gives in.

“She’s a good person,” I say, my voice a broken whisper. I don’t want to do this, but I have to do this. “She might even be a great girl. And today’s the day you first met. Today’s your first date. She’s going to remember being in the bookstore. She’s going to remember the first time she saw you, and how she was drawn to you, not just because you’re beautiful, but because she could see your strength. She could see how much you want to be a part of the world. She’ll remember talking with you, how easy it was, how engaging. She’ll remember not wanting it to end, and asking you if you wanted to do something else. She’ll remember you asking her, her favorite place, and she’ll remember thinking about here, and wanting to show it to you. The grocery store, the stories in the aisles, the first time you saw her room—that will all be there, and I won’t have to change a single thing. Her pulse is my heartbeat. The pulse is the same. I know she will understand you. You have the same kind of heart.”

“But what about you?” Hanni asks, her voice breaking, too.

“You’ll find the things in her that you find in me,” I tell her. “Without the complications.”

“I can’t just switch like that.”

“I know. She’ll have to prove it to you. Every day, she’ll have to prove she’s worthy of you. And if she doesn’t, that’s it. But I think she will.”

“Why are you doing this?”

“Because I have to go, Hanni. For real this time. I have to go far away. There are things I need to find out. And I can’t keep stepping into your life. You need something more than that.”

“So this is goodbye?”

“It’s goodbye to some things. And hello to others.”

I want her to remember how it feels to hold her. I want her to remember how it feels to share the world with her. I want her, somewhere inside, to remember how much I love her. And I want her to learn to love her in her own way, having nothing to do with me.

I had to ask Poole if it was really possible. I had to ask him if he could really teach me.

He promised he could. He told me we could work together.

There was no hesitation. No warning. No acknowledgment of the lives we’d be destroying.

That’s when I knew for sure I had to run away.

She holds me. She holds me so hard there’s no thought in it of letting go.

“I love you,” I tell her. “Like I’ve never loved anyone before.”

“You always say that,” she says. “But don’t you realize it’s the same for me? I’ve never loved anyone like this, either.”

“But you will,” I say. “You will again.”

If you stare at the center of the universe, there is a coldness there. A blankness. Ultimately, the universe doesn’t care about us. Time doesn’t care about us.

That’s why we have to care about each other.

The minutes are passing. Midnight is approaching.

“I want to fall asleep next to you,” I whisper.

This is my last wish.

She nods, agrees.

We leave the tree house, run quickly through the night to get back to the light of the house, the music we’ve left behind. 11:13. 11:14. We go to the bedroom and take off our shoes. 11:15. 11:16. She gets in the bed and I turn off the lights. I join her there.

I lie on my back and she curls into me. I am reminded of a beach, an ocean.

There is so much to say, but there’s no point in saying it. We already know.

She reaches up to my cheek, turns my head. Kisses me. Minute after minute after minute, we kiss.

“I want you to remember that tomorrow,” she says.

Then we return to breathing. We return to lying there. Sleep approaches.

“I’ll remember everything,” I tell her.

“So will I,” she promises.

I will never have a photograph of her to carry around in my pocket. I will never have a letter in her handwriting, or a scrap-book of everything we’ve done. I will never share an apartment with her in the city. I will never know if we are listening to the same song at the same time. We will not grow old together. I will not be the person she calls when she’s in trouble. She will not be the person I call when I have stories to tell. I will never be able to keep anything she’s given to me.

I watch her as she falls asleep next to me. I watch her as she breathes. I watch her as the dreams take hold.

This memory.

I will only have this.

I will always have this.

She will remember this, too. She will feel this. She will know it’s been a perfect afternoon, a perfect evening.

She will wake up next to her, and she will feel lucky.

Times moves on. The universe stretches out. I take a Post-it of a heart and move it from my body to hers. I see it sitting there.

I close my eyes. I say goodbye. I fall asleep.

Day 6034

I wake up two hours away, in the body of a girl named Lee Hyein.

Hyein doesn’t know it, but today she’s going far away from here. It will be a total disruption to her routine, a complete twist in the way her life is supposed to go. But she has the luxury of time to smooth it out. Over the course of her life, this day will be a slight, barely noticeable aberration.

But for me, it is the change of the tide. For me, it is the start of a present that has both a past and a future.

For the first time in my life, I run.

[patorucho]

pixquen and partikian . i fucked that up for a second and swapped their gods whoops

no i can do them also later ahehehem. analyzing them in order:

pixquen. good lord. hypothetically what if there was another you, the same way theres another version of your friend, and this motherfucker got white ass fucking eyes and can also be your friend. wait what

pixels holds this fucker by a rope. whenever quen tries to crawl out of whatever selfmade hell this bitch makes him do, it yanks him back like an owner with a dog. he whimpers what no he doesnt.

but yea no pixels is a wonderful copycat. it copies people and what particles does to kian like a curious kitten and then proceeds to amp it to 5000. whatever quentin experiences actually is never really said aloud or shared, what i mean by this he doesnt really share?? what happens to him? if someone asks, sure, but he never really shared about it for a long time. compared to kian and particles who showed a lot of the [torture] for everyone to see (not really, but there was more evidence to kian's struggle than quen's who pixels hid very well) and thats so fucking awesome truly. nobody knows the horrors im putting you through unless they ask, but until then youre mine.

kind of gay to have a obsidian room with a fake tree, sun, and land for you to put your doppelganger in as you rest from using his body for the day (GAY?)

partikian is just toxic yuri to pixquen's toxic yaoi. with the very flamboyant and loud appearance of Guess what! your friend is now Possessed with a God! and the damages particles does to kian, and kian despite trying his best not to bother anyone about it, or yell about his problems, people know!! people can see!! from the way he looks, to the state of his house. hes Not having a good time there, and particles was happy to take all the blame with a big grin. but particles is Nicer. it lets him go enough for him to hope he's okay, it shows how hes doing and that Hey everyone on the server, See this motherfucker? Yeah he needs your help. compared to pixels who keeps it under wraps.

and the gods personalities are swapped with the way they present themselves!! particles' approach with its doppelganger? loud and clear. its personality? quiet, stoic, reserved. it doesnt announce itself unless it wants to, but as its always been? quiet as a predator. pixels' approach? silent, under the rug, subtle if you look long enough. its personality? as LOUD as you can see. it WILL make its prescence KNOWN.

and their doppelgangers? well , theyre both loud, and stupid. but to their fucking god duplicates? they yell obviously, but theyre always shut up easily. like instinct to defy and then give in. kind of... mm... gay.

[tokuxsenshi]

Alright so I finished Sukeban deka 3 so now I've seen all 3 shows and I have some though where I did like 3 over all... It really also felt like a show that they wanted to make and just the name on to sell it like other then Yui using the yoyo and being in high-school literally all ascepts of sukeban deka are barely there just kinda coming in every so often to be like remember this is a 3rd entry to this series so one it's own its 10/10 show as a continuation of 1 and 2 it's more like 4/10 but I loved it I'm glad it had the name only so I could see it because I don't think I would given it the chance on its own so I'll rank them

1. Sukeban 2 because it takes what the oringal show brought and amped it up and Yuri

2. Sukeban 3

3. Sukeban 1 this show is a classic

But now I have no idea what I'm gonna watch

[neko-naruto]

You smile and I get sunburn

Summary: Imagine heading out to the Great White North for your one year anniversary in the middle of summer, for some reason Sapnaps partner decided it would be a wonderful place to spend two weeks.

Warnings: Sapnap gets chased by a goose, minor blood, hockey fight

Authors Note: *yuris your yaoi* behold, lesbians in Canada, because there was a free day for snf week and I wanted to use the 'Alternate Universe - Canada' tag before I die. Title taken from Sunburn by The Living Tombstone because it truly is the song of ever. I looked to like, all of Marceline the Vampire Queens outfit and hair styles for inspiration if I'm being honest. @sobredunia I need you to look at the lesbians right now, anyways, if any of ya'll enjoyed it, feel free to reblog or drop by the Ao3 port to comment or kudos.

"I think this is your worst idea yet," Sapnap said as Georgia tugged her through the air port, suitcase trailing behind them.

Georgia gave a small sigh, "Don't be an idiot, Canadas fun."

"It's cold, everyones a push over, and the wildlife is violent," Sapnap said, raising a finger for each point she listed off, "I already miss America."

"We're staying here for two weeks Sapnap, try not to be sour for the entire time," Georgia said, "We can just go to the hotel and pass out if you want."

"That'd be nice," Sapnap answered with, already clinging to her girlfriends side.

Georgia gave a hum of amusement as she made her way across the parking lot, their hotel merely across the street. The sun beat down on them without abandon in mere seconds, the air was crisp, neither of them are sure if it's better than having it be humid. Sapnap reluctantly let go of Georgia's side with the heat, opting to hold her hand instead.

Sapnap gave a whine of annoyance as they crossed the road, the heat of the ground seeped into the soles of their shoes. She kept her eyes trained on the white stripes painted onto the black below, "Fuck it's hot."

"It's like, August, summer is hot no matter where you are," Georgia said calmly, leading them into the brief reprieve of shade before they would have to dart through a blazing hot parking lot.

"That is not fair in the slightest," Sapnap whined, a brief tug on her wrist and they were weaving between cars, moving and still, too the hotel lobby.

Air conditioning hit them in an instant, chills engulfing them as they walked through the lobby. Their paces slowed just a bit, try and cool down before heading off to sleep despite it merely being four in the afternoon. Sapnap found herself lounging comfortably on a couch as her girlfriend got the key card. She roused from her psuedo-slumber with hands running through her hair, she found Georgia standing atop her, black hair tied into a loose ponytail far too low hanging in front of Sapnaps face.

"C'mon love, we have a pool side room," Georgeia said softly, mismatched hues glancing down at Sapnap carefully, she pulled herself off the couch and grabbed the suitcases once more.

"And you're sure I can't sleep out here?" Sapnap asked, following Georgia down carpeted hallways dilligently.

Georgia nodded, "I don't exactly want to get kicked out, have to withstand the summer heat."

Sapnap gave a hum, "Fair point."

The door swung open and light shone into the small hotel room, Sapnap easily dived in first, flicking on the light switches before anything else. She was rooting around the bathroom next, searching for those stupid extra small soaps and shampoos that barely last a night if you have long hair. The bounty was minimal, and with Georgia perched atop the counter, watching Sapnaps actions with intent, she had a hard time focusing.

"For someone who said she was sleepy you sure are amped up to loot the place," Georgia teased, Sapnap only looked up from where she sat, back pressed against the porcelain of the tub.

"Always loot hotels," Sapnap answered with, pushing herself up with a hand pressed to the edge of the basin. She brushed down the pleats of her skirt, snow white and somehow she'd managed to leave it unstained despite owning it for years at this rate. In part she knew the pristine condition was partially because of how little she wore it, even in private.

Georgia gave a hum of agreement, "Always, do you want the futon?"

"What? We aren't sharing a bed?" Sapnap asked, twirling past the door frame and kicking off her sneakers and placing them down next to their suitcases.

"I mean, we could," Georgia answered with, following Sapnap to the bed, "Can you behave yourself on the first night?"

Sapnap rolled onto her side a little bit to face Georgia who was sitting at the edge of the bed, "Maybe, maybe not."

"Well if you can't then you're getting the futon," Georgia said, flopping back to rest beside Sapnap.

"Yeah, I guess I could behave," Sapnap said, leaning over to a press a kiss to Georgias cheek.

"Get some sleep, I might stay up a bit longer," Georgia said softly.

Sapnap rolled over to rest her head on Georgias abdomen, wrapping her hands around her girlfriends thighs. She rested her chin at the base of the Brits rib cage and looked up at Georgia, "Don't stay up too long."

Georgia rested a hand on Sapnaps head, sliding past the bill of the baseball cap and ruffling through shaggy hair. It was long now, long for Sapnap at least, almost long enough to do stuff with it, "I'll be asleep before light don't worry."

-/-/-/-

"Tell me again why we're heading out to the lake?" Sapnap asked.

"Cause it's fun," Georgia said, "Besides, if we're getting a rental car we should probably drive it around."

"Yeah, but did we really have to drive out to the middle of butt-fuck nowhere?" Sapnap asked as she raised her sneakers to press against the dashboard, ripped jeans barely covered her socks, white with pink stripes.

Georgia nodded, "Absolutely, get your feet off the dash," She reached over and pressed down on Sapnaps shins.

Sapnap lowered her feet down, "Fine, are we almost there?"

"You'll have to wait," Georgia chided as she took a broad turn, hitting a rock that made the car jump.

"We're seriously off-roading?" Sapnap asked, returning her gaze to the windshield, finding a broad lake come into view, more than enough space to park.

Georgia shrugged, "A bit, it's fun, we're driving a Subaru, these things were made for off-roading," She curved to the edge of the road where it went from sandy gravel to rocks and sticks, the car vibrated.

Sapnap had to refrain from giving an exclamation, "Park the car already, if you keep hitting rocks I'm gonna hurl."

Georgia easily shifted into park and shoved open the door, a freshwater breeze hit her. Sapnap joined her on the drivers side, sliding over the hood of the car a bit. She wrapped an arm around Georgias waist before being led closer to the lakes edge, fingers interlacing with her own.

There was a spring to her step as she led Sapnap onto the dock, wooden planks sinking a little bit under their conjoined weight. Then they took another step, it swayed once more despite how firmly it was locked into the ground. Sapnap clutched Georgias hand a little tighter until they were at the edge of the dock, she sat down and crossed her legs while Georgia tugged of her socks and shoes to drop them into the water.

It was cold, really cold, the contrast to the sun shining down on them unfair. She was quick to retract her feet and cross her legs. She ran her hand through the water and pressed it to the back of Sapnaps neck, she recoiled instantly.

"What the heck?" She almost sounded mad as the icy liquid rolled down the back of her shirt, button up, Hawaii style print.

"Cold water, hot sun, I think they go nice together," Georgia said, doing it again, this time Sapnap didn't recoil.

She leaned into Georgias touch a little bit, "I guess," She glanced to the water, watching the faint silhouettes of fish move around, "It's nice out here, quiet."

"Now do you see why I wanted to go on a drive?" Georgia asked, Sapnap nodded.

"Yeah," Her voice is quiet as she speaks.

Georgia leans her head on Sapnaps shoulder, nudging aside a swath of hair that dropped to the small of her back to the other shoulder.

Then there's a loud honk, an obnoxiously loud squawking sound. They both glance over to its origins to find a few geese, large, gray, Canadian. Sapnap stands up first as the waterborne birds glide ever closer, Georgia follows as her girlfriend takes a few steps back.

"It's just some geese," She said, almost tauntingly, Sapnap shakes her head.

"Wrong, it's just some Canadian geese," Sapnap corrected with, then one of them hopped onto the dock, "They have teeth."

Georgia scoffs, "Birds don't have teeth."

It honks at them again and Georgia can't help but stare at it's beak, there are definitely teeth in there.

"It won't do you any harm," Georgia said, "Just hold out your hand, I'm sure it'll be docile."

"It'll bite my fingers off," Sapnap said, she still crouched down as Georgia kept stepping back.

When it got close enough for it to be a threat, that initial fear had her locked in place. At first it didn't do anything really, but Sapnap hasn't stopped holding her breath either. She tries to take a step back and for someone reason the bird takes insane amounts of offense at the actions. It attacks, it flaps it's wings and runs as fast as a goose can run. Sapnaps panicked backing away turned running doesn't do much to put any distance between her and the bird which has decided to take flight and start lunging at her.

She doesn't want to hurt it, she could get charged with misdemeanor if she did. So instead she just tried to cover her face, wishing she wore a t-shirt instead of a tank top to protect her shoulders from thrashing feathers and webbed feet. The honking, it was loud, really loud, and from more than one goose, she didn't dare look back to confirm what she already knew. She opened and slammed the door shut again, Georgia was already revving the engine and shifting into reverse.

Once they're far enough into the road the silence of panicked breathing became unbearable.

"They didn't bite off your finger," Georgia said sheepishly.

Sapnap raised a hand to her aching shoulder, when she pulled it back there was blood on her hands, "They tore open my fucking shoulder."

Georgia gives a hiss, "Yikes."

"How close is the closest coffee shop?" Sapnap asked, pressing her hand against the wound. It wasn't large per se, but it was definitely deeper than ideal, looked like uncut rubies whenever she shifted her arm.

"Five, ten minutes," Georgia said, "Not super far, but it's gonna be a Tim Hortons."

"Yay, Canadas one and only," Sapnap said, rolling her eyes as she did so.

"I'll cancel our tickets to the hockey game," Georgia threatened.

"I take it back," Sapnap said, raising her hands in faux defense, one of them was covered in blood.

"When we get back we'll clean out the wound," Georgia said, her eyes focused on Sapnap more than the road.

But Sapnap was distinctively aware of the moose deciding to meander out into the middle of the highway- Georgia, was not.

Sapnap reached over and swerved the car, nearly hitting the moose in the process.

"What the hell?!" Georgia asked, shoving back Sapnap.

"We nearly hit a moose!" Sapnap snapped, she returned a hand to press at her shoulder. It was wetter than before, and it hurt more with the sudden movement.

"And?" Georgia asked, voice smoothing over just a bit as she returned her gaze to the road.

Sanap clasped her hands in front of her chest, "Those things walk off getting hit by trucks Georgia, they go cliff diving for fun- we would die, it would live."

Georgia rolled her eyes, "Maybe I should've done a little bit more research on the wildlife."

"You should've done a lot more research on the wildlife," Sapnap said, tone almost aggressive.

"Wanna stay in town for the next couple days?" Georgia offered

Sapnap nodded, "I don't think I'll be doing much with how bad those geese fucked me over."

"I'd say let's go to a hospital, but we don't have the Canadian citizen perks," Georgia said sheepishly, "I'll pick up some gauze on the way back to the hotel."

-/-/-/-

Sapnap brings her hand to rest at her gauze covered shoulder, the fabric strip held only a faint tint of white compared to how it was the previous days. She took a seat on the edge of the tub and Georgia sat down beside her, hands came to undo the gauze. The air on the wound made her hiss, it was still tender and somewhat raw.

A damp cloth raised to press at the edges of it, where the pus of infection still oozed. It was worse the previous days, a lot worse, a total mess, and Sapnap was whimpering in pain as Georgia tended to it. Now she grits her teeth as soap comes into contact with flesh that refuses to scab with how consistently it's bandaged up. Her grip on the edge of the bath tightens until her knuckles shift hue, she clenches her eyes shut.

"I think we should leave it open," Georgia said quietly as she ran the cloth under cold water, watching the red diffuse under the flow of clear.

Sapnap nodded, "Maybe it'll scab up and start to heal."

Georgia stood up and held out a hand that Sapnap gladly took, she leaned into her girlfriend when she stood up. Georgia wrapped an arm around Sapnap, "Wanna watch some shitty cooking show and order room service?"

Sapnap nodded, "Yeah," Her voice was muffled in Georgias shoulder before she dropped down on the edge of the bed.

"I'll call up some room service, you put on a show," Georgia said as she started to dial the number.

Sapnap breezed through the channels with ease, a multitude of reality shows, some animated stuff, South Park and Family Guy. All sorts of things, even home renovation shows, she didn't stop until she came upon the cluster of cooking channels. She flipped through them a bit slower, Guy Fieri, Gordon Ramsay- The Great British Bake Off? She didn't hesitate to click on it, leaning back against a pillow that was wrapped in her shirt so blood wouldn't get on it.

"I got poutine," Georgia said, she gave a sigh of disappointment at her actions, "And a Hawaiian pizza, I had too."

Sapnap shrugged, "It's fine, you ever watch The Great British Bake Off?"

Georgia nodded, "Sometimes, yeah."

"Cool, cause that's what we're watching for the next two weeks," Sapnap said, "Every night, nonstop, I'm not taking criticism either."

Georgia rolled her eyes, "Trust me, you'll get sick of it fast if you try and marathon it."

"It'll be worth it, just to drive you up the walls," Sapnap said lovingly as she threw a grin to Georgia.

-/-/-/-

Sapnaps grip on Georgias hand tightened as they placed down their tickets, granted admission into the ice rink. The temperature dropped a couple degrees the second they entered the arena. Georgia, who had decided that wearing a t-shirt and jogging pants to a hockey game would be a good idea, instantly felt the chill. They took a seat at the top row of chairs, climbing over the back and watching as the game started.

"Fuck it's cold in here," Georgia managed bitterly, Sapnap placed a toque on her head, "Thanks."

"I told you to grab a jacket, didn't I?" Sapnap teased, she slung an arm around her girlfriends shoulders.

Georgia rolled her eyes, "I didn't think it would be this cold, or night time," She reached around to undo the bun in her hair.

"They have to keep the ice, ice, Georgia," Sapnap said, raising a hand to run through Georgias hair is it fell past her arm.

Georgia watched the game intently, eyes locked onto the game, "Still, it's summer, they don't do hockey games in summer."

"It's a home game," Sapnap said, she propped one leg over the other as she spoke, "They always do home games."

Georgia rolled her eyes a bit, "I guess, shame it's so boring."

"Hockey is not boring, there might be bloodshed," Sapnap said, Georgia quirked a brow at the notions.

"Bloodshed? In a hockey game? You jest," She said, leaning against Sapnap a little bit.

Sapnap nodded, "I don't know the statistics, but yeah, blood and broken bones happen every now and then."

"That's insane," Was all Georgia could muster at the notion.

She lifted her gaze up a bit to look at the crowd that was standing behind the rows of chairs. She was shocked so many people would pay to watch two groups of guys skate, with sticks. She squinted a bit at some she presumed she knew, orange fur, black outfit, definitely Fundy.

"Is that, is that Fundy?" Georgia asked, pointing at Fundys form as she spoke.

Sapnap looked over to where Georgia was pointing, the fox glancing over a bit, "What the hell is he doing in Canada?" She still waved him over, they could barely catch the recognition on his face before he started on his way over.

He weaved between the crowd skillfully, head low and tail swishing back and forth. He placed a hand on the back rest of either chair his friends sat at, he leaned in between them. He kept his eyes trained on the game as he he spoke, "How come you two are in Canada?"

"Anniversary," Georgia answered without skipping a beat.

"Since when did you two get married?" Fundy questioned, shock clear on his voice.

"Not yet, but like, one year of dating anniversary," Sapnap helpfully supplied, Fundy gave an 'ah' with a nod of his head, "Since when do you come to Canada?"

"Hockey town is every town, and sometimes I wanna watch hockey in person," Fundy said, "Can't censor the blood if I'm watching it happen in person."

"Told you there was blood in hockey," Sapnap said, sticking out her tongue playfully as she did so.

"Well, let's hope there's blood today," Georgia said.

Fundy was quick to point down at the rink, "Check it!"

Georgia glanced to where he was pointing, the sharp edge of someone's skate made it's way up to underneath someone's eye. In an instant red was on the ice and staining their snow white jersey.

"Oh that's cool," Georgia said as the ref rolled out and ferried them away.

Sapnap nudged her with her elbow, "Told you."

Fundy nodded, "Hecka cool, sadly they'll be super careful now."

"No more blood?" Georgia asked.

"No more blood," Sapnap said, "Besides, it gets kind of boring after a couple goals."

Georgia stood up, "So, can we head home?"

"You don't wanna watch the entire bout of carnage? There's still gonna be loads of cross-checking and slashing," Fundy asked, hopping over the back of the seat next to Georgia.

"Not really, I kind of wanna go chill out," Georgia said, stretching her arms over her head as she spoke, "There's a pool."

"Epic, can I drop by and go swimming then?" Fundy asked, teasingly for the most part.

"I don't think they want fur clogging up their business," Sapnap said as she helped Georgia over the back of the chair.

Fundy leaned back on his chair, giving a Cheshire smirk, "You think so?"

Sapnap reached down and ran a hand through the fur on the top of his head, "Totally bro."

"Alright, have fun on your anniversary," Fundy said, looking at the game once more, he waved them off as they left.

-/-/-/-

"Hurry up and get on your swim shorts already!" Georgia whined impatiently, knocking on the door to the hotel bathroom.

"You take your sweet time putting on a one piece!" Sapnap shouted back before clicking open the door, holding the straps of the top she wore, "I need help," She turned around.

Georgia held a strap in each hand, "You gotta figure out how to do this yourself, or just buy a one piece."

Sapnap rolled her eyes, "Well maybe I just want your help and I can do it myself."

"If you could you would totally do it yourself," Georgia chided as she tied a bow into the straps.

"You have zero proof to back up that statement," Sapnap said, spinning around once more to face Georgia, "I forgot how pretty you look in a swim suit."

"I always look good," Georgia countered with, dragging along Sapnap to the pool side door.

"Totally," Sapnap said, "Like, super good."

"Sapnap," Georgia said sternly, "We are not having sex in the hot tub."

"They have a hot tub?" Sapnap asked giddily, instantly shattering the mood she was oblivious to setting.

Georgia gave a small sigh, a smile on her face, "Yes Sapnap, they have a hot tub."

"Forget swimming then," Sapnap said, refraining from dashing across the deck, "Straight to the hot tub."

Georgia glanced to the hot tub, "There's a lot of other people in there already."

"Fine then, to the regular pool," Sapnap stated, pivoting on her heel before stepping down into the water.

Cold shock washed over her instantly, she was eager to goad Georgia into stepping down despite the fact she was clearly freezing.

"It's the perfect temperature in here!" Sapnap said as Georgia crouched down and slipped in.

"It is not the perfect temperature in here at all!" Georgia snapped, hands raising to rub her arms, "It's fricking cold."

Sapnap grinned a bit as she splashed some water on her girlfriend who gave an offended 'Hey!' before returning the favor. It didn't take long for it to devolve into a water fight, lunging standing on tippy toes to drop a handful of water atop heads. There was shouting and laughing, a couple other people had left, most likely discouraged by the noise.

"Okay, now I'm thoroughly soaked," Georgia said, still grinning with euphoric adrenaline running through her veins. Sapnap swears her grin is the sun in that moment, shining bright in the relaxed lighting of pool corridor. She could go blind if she stared too long but she doesn't mind it much.

Sapnap nodded, "Same, but I'd say it's worth it, plus, the hot tubs empty!" She gestured vaguely to the now deserted hot tub.

"That's because we were getting too rowdy idiot," Georgia said, raising a hand to flick Sapnaps forehead. She hissed a bit, batting away the hand in a fashion all to familiar to that of a cat.

"They don't know the half of rowdy, your hair tie didn't even fall out," Sapnap said, reaching over to tug gently at the bright red bands in Georgias hair. Then rested her hand at bright red earrings resting in Georgias ears, small hoops with a stud of red.

Georgia batted away the hand but still mirrored the motions, resting her hands on the blue studs in Sapnaps ears, "Let's be thankful for that."

Sapnap nodded in response before gliding over to the edge of the pool, Georgia followed.

The water was practically boiling when it hit them, but they descended anyways. Sapnap sat down first, splaying her arms atop the back of edge of the pool. Georgia sat down on her lap, resting her arms atop Sapnaps shoulders as she grinned.

"I thought we weren't having sex in the hot tub," Sapnap said, sliding down her hands to rest on Georgias waist.

"We aren't," She pressed a kiss to Sapnaps lips, "We're just kissing, there is a difference."

Sapnap leaned forward to meet Georgia in another kiss, "Yeah, I guess so."

Georgia gave a laugh, it was prompt and melodic to Sapnap, "Definitely a difference," They met in another kiss and it was nothing more than teeth and tongue as a hand raised to tug out her hair tie, black framing her body and face like she was a prized painting.

She pressed in a little deeper at Georgias waist, her smile was hazy when they pulled away again, "Totally a difference."

[kayssweetdreams]

Prim and Proper Problems Ch 20

The group looked in awe at the sheer number of kids outside of the school. With Ren and Miguel holding up a flag with both schools crests on it. However, the most shocking of all, was that standing proudly in the center of the army of kids...was Yuri and Kaylo, acting as the leaders of them all.

Madame Prim was horrified at the return of the girls, especially because they had been returned to normal...and they didn't look happy with her..."Now Girls. Everything you're doing is improper! Have you forgotten Everything I have taught you?!" She screeched. "NO PRIM!! WE SNAPPED OUT OF YOUR STUPID 'PURIFICATION' AND NOW WE'RE GONNA LIBERATE THE REST OF THE GIRLS HERE!!" Kaylo yelled.

Madame Prim paled, not only did two of her former 'students' snap out of it, but now they brought a whole army of improper delinquent to tear apart the school. "Oh. And we didn't come alone." Yuri said through a Megaphone. That made everyone confused, until the angry shouting of the Brand and Bruno families were heard with a very loud

"WHERE IS SHE?!"

The headmistress paled at the voices. She had never had to deal with the angry parents who were furious about their children's perfection brainwashing...until now. "Now here's what you're gonna do. You're gonna let our friends go, and call off this whole operation. Or We're gonna storm the school." Yuri said through the Megaphone. Madame Prim however, wasn't going to back down so easily

"Security!! Get all of those delinquents ready to Re-educated." She yelled out. Kaylo narrowed her eyes. "You heard the lady! CHARGE!!!" She shouted. The crowds of rowdy, sugar high kids rushed to the doors. The guards struggled to hold them back as the kids burst in. "Miguel. Our Battle anthem please?" Kaylo asked. The teen smirked as he plugged his guitar into at least 40 different amps and speakers, and let out a power chord towards the school, making the windows shatter and burst.

The inhabitants trapped in the chamber ducked their heads as the glass that surrounded the chamber burst. When the glass hit the ground, Clem and Bianca had burst into the chamber, both of which were holding wire cutters, lock picks, and a blowtorch. "We're here to rescue you!" Bianca said, already getting to work on freeing her father.

"Thank goodness! But...how did you darlings find us?" Lucy asked, as Clem released her from her cuff "Yuri and Kaylo told us. They had said that they needed help with something and that you were involved in it somehow. They just told us to get every student in our schools, and bring them here for a revolution! Which I guess now makes sense." He explained.

Once The adults were freed, Purrla and Grim had gotten to work freeing the kids, and Misère from the metal chairs. Purrla used her claws to pick the locks, while Grim had resorted to freezing and breaking them. Once they were free, Fortsepher bust open the remains of what once the chamber, and the group burst out and got to work destroying the machines. "Grab the jars! They hold the other girls personalities! They'll override the brainwashing!" Fortie said as he began to grab the various jars of multicolored liquid personalities

Inside of the school itself, Madame Prim watched in horror as the the various students from the other schools laid waste to her "perfect" institution. She watched as Ren began drawing on the walls while Phil and Lila Bia began smashing the many antiques that lined the school halls. A loud chime caught her attention as Flint Glover and Annie Hudson rode downstairs on a tall grandfather clock

"You little brats!! That was an antique!!" She screamed before another paint bomb was lobbed in her direction. "GUARDS!! WHY AREN'T YOU DOING ANYTHING?!" She shrieked into a nearby walkie talkie "THERE'S TOO MANY OF THEM!! WE'RE OUTNUMBERED!!" A guard cried in response. Madame Prim narrowed her eyes "WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! THEY'RE CHILDREN!!" She asked, "THE GIRLS!! THEY'RE JOINING IN! DELANCY JUST GRABBED A CLEAVER FROM THE KITCHEN AND IS CHASING DOWN MY SQUADRON!!" He screamed in reply.

Madame Prim paled. They had all found the jars. "PRIM!! WHERE ARE YOU!! I'LL TEACH YOU WHAT HAPPENS WHEN SOMEONE MESSES WITH A BRUNO!!" Thea yelled out. The room shook from the force of her yell. Scurrying away, Madame Prim took refuge in her office, but even that wasn't safe, as one of the Graden's Rose Bushes were lit on fire, and tossed into her office.

Dolly however, was cowering underneath the table to drown out the madness "Dolly Dear! Pack your bags! We're gonna go somewhere for a while." Madame Prim said with whatever grace and dignity she had left. Dolly nodded as she opened a small hidden passage in the bookshelf, but her face was exposed to a golden mist before she passed out.

Madame Prim panicked as she saw the inhabitants, Negabosses and Wonder Stars enter through the passage...and they were MAD. "It's OVER Prim. This little operation of yours is finished." Mei said. The older woman glared at her "NO! I will never give up on perfecting the imperfect generation! Even if that means I have to start from scratch. I'll rebuild from the ground up. THE WORLD WILL BE PERFECT." She screeched.

The kids glared at her before a voice cut the tension...

"MOM?! WHAT THE HECK?!"

Mei, Bianca, Clem, Annie, Flint, Phil, Lila and the Brand family belong to @sundove88

Rebecca belongs to @thehypercutstudios/@thehyperrequiem

Trisha Jane belongs to @lovelyteng

[randomnameless]

Goddamn, the jump to a fully-3D game fucked over 3H hard when it came to it's boss variety; out of 27 paralogues across all the routes, 9 of them have unique bosses that aren't used elsewhere in the game, with the other 18 paralogues having Jeritza, Hubert or Catherine, generic fodder with slightly-amped stats pretending to be bosses, or no bosses at all.

Honestly, the Jeritza and Hubert inclusions may be my least favorite method of the three; it puts them in stories they have nothing to do with character-wise just for the sake of not making it too obvious that the side content is severely lacking in unique bosses, while also needlessly increasing Jeritza's already-comically-high amount of fights from 7 to 8 and Hubert's actually-reasonable amount of fights (post-route split at least, but i don't think it's too fair to count the prologue sparring matches as proper mini-boss encounters) from 3 to 5.

LOL

Bar the boss variety, what seriously pissed me is the lack if special battle convos with the bosses.

Flayn'n'Seteth have no lines against Maurice or worse, Nemesis himself!!!!

Heck, you could even make lines between Kostas and Leonie, Kostas going all uwu "you noble brats don't know what it is to be born a commoner !" and Leonie rekting him, because she wasn't born a noble, and yet, she's not killing children because someone paid her to do so (tfw jerry is a mercenary who kills people for money :()

Granted, I'll give credit where it's due, Tru Piss has the most battle convos, and reading them is a blast.

I'd have prefered for Flayn to have more convos against her classmates (maybe a special one with Linhardt who might have guessed who she is!), but it's Tru Piss for you.

But for the paralogue, ultimately, yes. Jeritza, or Hubert, or a random NPC. Man, imagine having to fight Leopold or Whodislava in a paralogue, like Grégoire was sent to "negotiate" with the Brigid people, or Leopold is the one rounding up the "imperial militia" in Hrym when Ferdie and Lysithea visit for their paralogue...

But no, we don't have any side or NPC character, and imo, it also participates in making Fodlan so bland - no NPCs, only the same two guys for some reason...

At least in the Yuri paralogue, we have Myson!

But he doesn't have a sprite :(

[haljathefangirlcat]

International Fanworks Day: Feedback Fest Recs

Or, a list of wonderful crossover on AO3 that you really, REALLY should read. Originally written down in the comments to this post, which you also really, really should check out.

In A Strange Land (Nibelungenlied/Parzival): The Medieval literature rare crossover I didn't know I needed in my life. Laugh-out-loud funny, taking full advantage of the differences in tone, narrative structure, and storytelling devices between the poems it's based on in an elegantly sharp way that's absolutely irresistible and of the various traditions behind those same poems. So clever I periodically reread it. Also, specifically for the other nerds following this blog: great Hagen and Volker voices.

Tea Journal (Strange Magic/Fables): A story that uses the worldbuilding of one work to highlight the characterization of the other and bring it to its full potential, taking the readers on a journey moving smoothly from romance to drama to fluff, angsty and tender and fun and sexy until it reaches a beautiful, moving conclusion.

When Wart met the Doctor (Doctor Who/The Once and Future King): A fic I have craved since reading a certain tiny little line in The Sword in The Stone, using an inconsequential moment in the canon to build up a short yet delightful scene full of wonder and fun.

Identity Crisis (Prince of Tennis/Yuri!!! On Ice): A subtly cracky romp that brings two stubborn, prickly characters together via two adorable, fluffy cats with an attitude. How can you not love even just the premise!?

The Pendragon-Gorlois Family Reunion (The Historically Inaccurate Remix) (Good Omens/Arthurian Mythology): A cute, fun story with some nice moments of quiet, understated angst in between, finding thoroughly entertaining ways to play with Good Omens' wit and humor, Arthuriana's penchant for telling the same story in fundamentally different ways and amp up the drama whenever it can, and even certain things taken from Merlin BBC and its fandom. Which is fair, because it was written as a remix of a story about Crowley and Aziraphale watching the show, making it a lovely display of fannish creativity in more ways than one.

Green (Mad Mad: Fury Road/Norse Religion & Lore): A story about redemption, death, and growth and healing -- in that order. As the tags say, it's all about "turning patriarchal myths on their heads." A great rec if you were fascinated by the Norse mythology references in Fury Road, spent way too much time pondering over the the writers possibly slipping in a few more implicit ones (okay, maybe that’s just me), were always fascinated by Loki's children and appreciative of more positive takes on them, were always thrilled by kinder takes on death and the afterlife in general, and/or simply felt for Nux while watching the movie.

[specterthief]

@gayfertilitygoddess sticking this under a cut because it's long!

so basically, the shindos are established contextually as really patriarchal - all of the aunts are older than aiichiro, but aiichiro was still the heir of the family, and the only way the aunts have any kind of power is by using their nephew as a puppet. maintaining a secure line of succession is also something that they seem to be very concerned with - aiichiro died (comparatively) young and the aunts (and ainosuke's off-screen nameless grandfather, who is still the head of the family) are really tightening the screws on ainosuke at only 26 to hurry up and get married (implicitly, start having sons) already. plus for all that he has limited freedom at home/in his day to day life, keeping S running and safe does still require a lot of money that he's been able to dip into behind his family's back and being in enough of a position of power to be making deals with the chief of police to keep S from being raided etc so the whole basic concept of the show is pretty dependent on his status.

so imagining cis woman adam (aiko) immediate creates a bunch of issues with the whole foundation of the series where i COULD just handwave to be like "they just let her do all that, the shindos are less sexist in this universe" but that messes with the whole power dynamic of aiichiro and his sisters in a way i don't want to do for how i personally like to do genderbends (hence "the only way i could make her work the way i want to", not "the only way fem!adam could work ever" - everyone do whatever you want forever) so... i have to deal with the fact that aiko as an only child wouldn't be in consideration as an heir, with the fact that even if aiichiro died without ensuring he had a male heir first his father could simply adopt one so there'd have to be SOMEONE to carry on the shindo name, and than an aiko in an arranged political engagement to Some Guy (and whose only utility to her aunts at this point is as a means to make shindo sons they can actually vie for power with the way they do with ainosuke) would not be in the position to be funneling cash and flexing her family's power to run her illegal underground skateboarding gay club... unless her would-be-husband had a reason to be indulging her.

so, tadashi - adult adoption where wealthy sonless men adopt heirs to inherit their estates/carry on their family (and parents adopting their child's spouse) is EXTREMELY common in japan (more than 90% of yearly adoptions in japan were of adult men as of the 2010s), and aiichiro elevating tadashi into a position that seems like a blessing but puts a huge burden of obedience to this terrible family on him and alienates him from ainosuke is already a thing, this causing friction (to say the least) between them when tadashi seems to be more loyal to enforcing aiichiro's will beyond the grave than to ainosuke himself is already a thing, the weird power dynamic of tadashi indulging and very instrumentally enabling adam's behavior out of guilt while self-flagellating about how he led him down the wrong path and being determined to stop him but not actually using the power he has to force him (while adam knows he could) is a thing.

so the best solution i was able to come up with to all my fem adam woes is that in this universe aiichiro made a big PR stunt out of adopting tadashi as his heir, and arranged tadashi and aiko (who are both very gay and platonic childhood friends in this universe) to be married to keep the family name and bloodline both intact and then died before the marriage actually happened, leaving them in an amped-up-to-eleven version of their terrible stalemate but now as a horrible arranged betrothal they're both trying to stall out as long as they can. and that means keeping tadashi as a guy, so unfortunately he doesn't get to be an active participant in the skateboard yuri unless i can eventually come up with other solutions for fem adam that work with fem tadashi (tadami?) that i'm satisfied with

someday i need to post about my comprehensive sk8 where everyone but tadashi is a woman AU

[catsvrsdogscatswin]

Hellsing Commentary 3 Notes

This commentary is done by Taliesin Jaffe, the voice director and script adapter of Hellsing, Victoria Harwood, the voice of Integra Fairbrook Wingates Hellsing, and JB Blanc, the voice of Enrico Maxwell and the Cheddar Priest. Direct quotes may vary in accuracy, as these are written down from audio without transcripts. I also didn't write down every joke or piece of trivia because I feel like people who watch the commentaries should get to have some nice surprises for stuff that isn't covered here.

-Yuri Lowenthal, Pip's VA, apparently speaks French. Victoria also calls him "a very sexy character, you wanna sort of follow him."

-JB Blanc playfully comments that "there isn't nearly enough blood in this episode."

-At the time of recording the OVA 3 commentary, JB and Victoria have known each other for 20 years, since Victoria was twelve and JB was eighteen respectively. Steven Brand (Anderson's VA) brought Victoria to Hellsing, and she brought JB during the original run. JB Blanc and Steven Brand even lived together at that point ("but not in the biblical sense, uh, it was a very very chaste relationship"). Victoria knew Steven Brand for even longer than JB, and they were "in one of the worst plays ever, ever written" together.

-Victoria Harwood was the very last actress they auditioned for Integra's role, and until she came in they were going to settle on an actress who was competent but sounded too young. "She sounded thirteen. Just, no gravitas, no gravitas."

-When Victoria watches herself as Integra she thinks that she sounds like she's on Mogadon.

-Victoria also comments that she likes how everyone has "very different colored eyes" in this show. JB agrees and says "Mine are purple, for god's sake."

-When talking about the differences in the Cheddar priest performances, Taliesin restates that Ultimate is going for a different level of camp from the original TV series. JB agrees and says "Its almost a level of camp beyond any I have ever experienced, and believe me, I've experienced some camp."

Victoria: "Yeah but, well, that was when you were living with Steven Brand."

JB: "Pretty much, yeah yeah, there was a lot of camp going on then."

-Continuing on the differences between Ultimate and the original series, JB says of Ultimate that "You know its sexier, its more arch, its more Gothy, its more...its like everything the first one had, amped-up, and it makes it more fun."

-Taliesin states that a friend that yells at him about acting theory says "'Its very much like doing opera.' Its just, its all exercise. You're not even -you're almost not struggling for a character at any point, you're just, its just this exercise in theory." JB agrees and says "You're driven by the image much more, and therefore you're always trying to pitch up to what the images are telling you and to try and honor what the Japanese has before you."

-Victoria says that "the time thing" is what she found difficult, with the Japanese taking things a lot slower than what she's used to. "That's what I mean about the Mogadon, sometimes I'm like 'Oh my god, how much- how long can I- (JB chips in at this point with "Aaaallooow me to introoooduuuce myseeelf") how much slower and sort of -controlled, and very measured."

-When discussing Seras, Victoria comments "That's the whole manga thing, isn't it? It's all about-" JB overlaps her at this point, saying "Chests and short skirts." Victoria replies "Well- well I was gonna say 'tits and panties.'" JB says "'Chest and short skirts' is the polite version of 'tits and panties'." as they both chuckle.

-Taliesin says that at a meeting with Hirano discussing future things in Ultimate, Hirano said that he was just going to keep making Seras's chest bigger and bigger as per his own frustration levels. JB chips in and says "I think its integral to the story. As the pressure grows, so does the pressure on her shirt."

-JB says that Gildart Jackson (the Major's VA) is "absolutely superb in this, it's wonderful. It's great. It's pretty great work, the mad German."

-JB also says that Crispin has underplayed his role beautifully throughout. Taliesin admits that he doesn't write Alucard very well, since he knows Crispin will come in and work on everything with him anyway, so he sort of cheats and says "Eh, good enough." for a lot of his dialogue script.

-Victoria has two boys as of the time of recording OVA 3, and "Actually, Jonathan (the producer) rang me...about ten minutes after I had given birth, and said- and launched straight in 'We need you back!' -it was for something else- 'We need you back!' and I was like, I said 'I'm in hospital.' He said 'What are you doing in hospital?' 'Nothing,' I said, 'I've just had a baby.' and he said 'Well- well- oh god, yeah, s-stop talking to me!' You know, get off the phone. But I was back in a week later." Taliesin agrees and says he has also crawled his way out of a hospital bed several times to "crawl in here and get something done."

-JB says "If you ever want to know anything about anything, get Taliesin drunk at a convention, and it will all spill forth, like the blood of Alucard's victims."

-Taliesin says that the VA who played the Pope was a "fabulously crude man." His track was also recorded first, and JB compliments him because "I could actually, like, keep a check on my Italian accent because his was so good."

-Taliesin says that "as long as there's a controlling, awful director" as the voice of Harkonen, it would be fine.

-Taliesin initially got together "all the Brazilian accents" for the Rio teams, but then he took a minute and saw that they were "the whitest-looking Rio de Janeirian people I've ever seen" and decided to use an American SWAT team instead.

-Taliesin actually counted "everybody who dies" in the Rio scenes, and gave them a name. "So that you can actually pay attention and not have nine people die in the same scene that are all voiced by the same actor. And keep some sort of continuity as to who's talking, and where they are, so that if you have a Team Leader who's up on the roof, is not the same Team Leader that's down on the ground, who's not the same Team Leader who's in the elevator...the final bodycount was somewhere, oh, was it seventy-five people? Uh, there's seventy-five individual pieces of, of slaughter in this next, in the rest of this episode."

-Victoria laughs and comments "he likes it, ooh" when Alucard starts cackling after Integra's outburst.

-JB and Victoria both comment that they find the little exhales of anime much more difficult than the laughs. Taliesin directly tells the audience that "None of you know what I go through, there is- I have yet- I have yet to meet an English actor who can do a sound-effect, those little breaths and Japanese clicks." Victoria makes an inquisitive noise and he continues "None of them- they're all -all of you are uncomfortable doing it." Victoria argues that "-its a purely Japanese thing! I mean, what we would do is go 'Huh?' 'What?' like I mean, you know, get an American to do it."

Taliesin: "All of my American boys, they come in, they hit them first try."

JB: "Well if we're not good enough for you Tally-"

Victoria: "Yeah, we'll just fuck off."

JB: "Yeah, we'll just resign from this series, you can go screw yourself. I've never been so insulted in all my life!"

Victoria: "No! That's it, let's go."

They then both start what Victoria calls "porn grunting" as all three descend into giggles. JB says "It is porn grunting, that's why we're uncomfortable with it! We're English, sensually repressed individuals." Between breathless laughter, Taliesin calls JB "one of the most deeply unrepressed human beings I've ever met in my life."

-Taliesin and JB had drinks at a weekend once in Texas and JB got drunk enough to do his "gay cop" impression.

-The elevator scene was saved for last, and Taliesin made sure that "if you listen very carefully, there are still screams of pain and murder going all the way down that elevator shaft."

-Victoria misses the music from the original series, calling it "groovy," and Taliesin says that they've gone "kinda classical" for Ultimate. She says that she loved the original music and Taliesin agrees, saying that that was one of the most radical changes from the new series to the old.

-JB says that he really likes Alhambra's VA, even if he doesn't know who it was, and that he's great. Taliesin agrees and says "It's a weird accent, it's kind of a weird accent, its one that can go a little too camp really easily, it's the clean Spaniard? I wanted it to be kinda thin...everybody who auditioned didn't quite get the level of camp."

-JB also comments of anime that "Well, this is the danger, you see: this stuff is melodramatic, and it allows you to go certain places, but I think a lot of American actors, I mean, particularly people who do stuff on screen...they're very worried about being very internal, and this stuff just doesn't sustain that. You have to come out of your shell, you have to push it, you have to be more arch, otherwise you just don't do the format justice."

-Taliesin comments sympathetically on Alhambra's VA who had to "stretch this scream out" when Alucard breaks his leg.

-Getting the lip-flap to work in German was "fun" for Taliesin.

-The "Welcome to this crazy time" song that the Major tosses out at the end is an opening theme for Fist of the North Star. There is also a reference to Gundam slightly earlier, and according to Taliesin, Hellsing is full of similar little nods.

[animebw]

And that’s a wrap on Yuru Yuri season 3, as well as Yuru Yuri as a whole!

Season 3 is... weird. Actually, it’s not really weird at all, which, paradoxically, is what makes it weird. The first two seasons of this show lived and died on buckwild insanity, with ludicrous gags that broke any and all sense of logic and animation that amped up the antics to absurd degrees. There was nothing natural or realistic about it, and whether that’s a good or bad thing is up to each viewer to decide. But season 3, produced by the relatively unknown TYO Animations instead of Doga Koba, pulls back on that absurdity. The world is basically coherent, the animation doesn’t break reality with its intensity, and the anarchic glee that defined its comic sensibilities before has been replaced with... well, a cute girls show. Not a bad cute girls show, but something a lot more ordinary than what it started out as.

Did I still enjoy it? Mostly, yeah; the jokes are still at season 2′s level most of the time, and it keeps Akari’s sister off screen as much as possible, which is nothing but a positive in my book. But coming from the hilarious, irreverent heights of season 2, this definitely feels like a step back into something far less special. Oh well, though, what can you do? Let’s just call it a 6/10 and put this series to bed. See you next time when I return to Space Brothers!

[nabrizoya]

one of the super interesting things, to me, about row's messiness was that KoS...wasn't that bad? Like i had some questions about why nina was a PoV despite loving her, and I didn't love the finale because I didn't (and still don't) think bringing the d*rkling back did anything for the plot (i DO think dealing with the cult was interesting for the characters to wrestle with) but then row seemed to veer in SUCH a different direction? It just took such a left turn in so many places.

SDFGHJKLJHGDFGHJ yes yes yes anon.

more seriously speaking, kos was better than row because it actually set up the plot line in tandem with the end of ck. parem was introduced and its effects were shown in ck, along with noting kuwei yul bo's integral role in the development of the antidote. further discussion was provided to pit parem against merzost, and then against the corrupted making and the use of the amplifiers. these were all the concepts that were partially fulfilled in kos, effectively (and expectantly) setting up the threads that one can commonly assume will be followed through in row. like, kos is the first book. that's the expectation, right? the first books set course and the second picks up from there and add a plot of its own in addition to fulfilling the previous unfinished themes and topics.

kos made sense also because parem's other perspectives were thrown light upon. it's a drug, we know, and we got to see how adverse and heinous of many implications it has medically (?) and what happens to the people and the Grisha affected by it. Now I won't say this aspect of showing—especially with how Nina's story carried this arc in the book—was executed properly, what with her whole arc feeling so disjointed in the book , but it was... a good direction to explore ... and also something that row failed to bring up yet again

(also, the scales between both zoyalai and nina in different countries was contrasting and unmatched, which not only unbalanced the povs, but was also very insensitive to all the three of them. like, on one hand we have to read about women getting tortured and everything and then shift back to yuri genuflecting and zoya and nikolai in sandcastles debating about power? and then veer to isaak trying to handle being a king? like,,, this aspect of it was so insensitive to all of their insecurities, prowess and problems, and as a cherry on the cake, there's not enough page time or text to continue and show their mental dilemmas properly either)

the other good part of kos was to show how everybody weaponized parem. shu and fjerda, we've seen how they used parem wrongly but ravka too wanted to see if there were other uses to parem, to make a usable strain instead of completely eradicating it. it gets brought up in the conversation between grigori and nikolai in the fold, and it's that very impact and grisha theory that puts a stop to ravka weaponizing the drug, and instead seeking to merely amp up the production of the antidote ... and we get to see barely more than a chapter (After reading an entire book about parem and its adversity) in row.

very insensitive and poorly done, no?

bringing the darkling back was, gosh i have no idea why it was a good idea at all? it put the whole trilogy's efforts to waste, and the darkling became nothing more than a comic relief in row (cheers for that). but even then, his arc from the books was supposed to show a parallel to zoya's, and that despite zoya actively trying to not become the next darkling, that she will be legions better than this old scum, the war still compells her to consider and reconsider her choices and the current state of affairs, which is interesting, but could easily have been achieved by looking into the darkling's past, seeking alina out without the darkling and with an overall analysis of the darkling's methodologies and mistakes... which could all have been done without the darkling being present.

the cult of the starless would also have been an excellent way to depict this sort of respect to strength, but found on the ploughs of blind faith and no critical thinking at all... there is potential there, a lot of it,,, but all of it was in vain, wasn't it?

this is what i mean, and i wholeheartedly agree with you anon. row did veer into another direction entirely, completely invalidating the previous book/s plots and taking one on its own. it also effectively compromised the characters and their characterizations as well, rendering their arcs completely underwhelming and missing out on their potential entirely.