#through this she can actually be herself
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"Howl Pendragon gender envy this, Howl gender envy that"
that's all fine and dandy, but grandma Sophie Hatter? LOOK AT HER
gotta be one of my favorite genders of all time
#i love her#no but diana wynn jones was so smart for this#though the witch cast the initial curse#it slowly became something sophie clung to like a security blanket#as an old woman she is free from society's expectations of young women#her appearance frees her from the burden of being desired and having to be desirable#through this she can actually be herself#she is not restrained by gender norms#and doesn't have to act like a young lady is expected to#or worry about making herself fade into the background to avoid any unwanted attention#she is the unwanted attention#also#unrelated#but related#howl is into gilfs#howls moving castle#sophie hatter#howl jenkins pendragon#text post#calcifer
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im a child of divorce
#the bit is over when i say its over and even when its so joever for these two its not over for me!!! (once again i am on heavy copium)#anyway. thoughts behind the spoiler tags#gempearl#shiny duo#wild life smp#life series spoilers#wild life spoilers#i feel like. i actually was expecting that#no but its so funny the one time the negative consequences of something does actually get acknowledged its the SL finale ‘betrayal’/j#like cmon fuck me i guess/j (BIG EMPHASIS. ON THE SLASH J. OKAY.)#but honestly though i did expect Gem to hold a grudge over the 2v1 in SL. and. its good that there are consequences???#it IS a ‘betrayal’ in Gem’s eyes. they were friends. they were murder besties for the last two sessions and then Pearl chose Scar over her#and its awesome man. [through gritted teeth] this is awesome man this will be good for character development ok ok ok. ok?#its also got something to do with Pearl having the red creep in. i think#because during SL Gem was like. nearly idolising the Scarlet Pearl persona while vaguely aware that her own reputation has a similar effect#and yknow. the horrors. the fact that their image is so heavily built on what others deem them to be and they can only play into it#but by the end of SL Gem gets ‘betrayed’ by this persona that she looked up to#and also her own ‘GeminiSlay’ intimidating image is also starting to fall apart. partly of her own will#and now shes watching Pearl slowly turn red again. and this time she knows its not good for her or Pearl#so shes distancing herself from it. shes ‘trying to fix her reputation’. she sees Pearl falling into it again and just. no. i dont love you#you betrayed me last season#but on Pearl’s end of things she’s already deep into the idea that as long as you say you ‘forgive’ someone then everything thats happened#in the past doesn’t matter and they can all be friends. and nooo absolutely no grudges will be held. no emotional repression here#so. because thats happened to her in her own team she thinks the same can happen with her and Gem#and thats so. im going to blow myself up now
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Rouge-like tendencies, courtesy of grandpa
#scary is a clothes thief i believe it#one day she takes off a jacket to reveal one of lincs Garfield shirts that no one even knew was missing#normals like: “scary do you like... not own any clothes??? is that what this is??? we can BUY you some clothes scary.”#scarys like: “are you just jealous cause i dont steal any of your clothes?”#normal: “YOUVE TAKEN EVERYONE ELSES!!! WHATS WRONG WITH MY CLOTHES??? IS IT THE SHADE OF BLUE? DO YOU HATE THE BLUE?? I CAN CHANGE!”#scary: “its cause they all have fuckin teeny the teen on them.”#normal: “thats.... okay. actually thats kinda reasonable. i was worried you didnt like them because-”#scary: “-also they REEK. have you ever washed any of these?”#normal: “oh. yeah. thats.... thats what i thought you were gonna say.”#her justification for why she steals everyones clothes is to show those losers how much better they look on her#(its cause she loves them. and only knows how to express herself through her appearance.)#scary marlowe#dndads#dungeons & daddies#dungeons and daddies#terry jr stampler#terry junior#taylor swift#dndads s2#fanart#digital drawing#my artwork#fan art#taylor swift close foster#terry jr#my art
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im so glad that we never get a clear picture of sophie’s background in leverage & i hope we never do. however i also really like making up various, often conflicting backstories for her in my head. perhaps they’re all backstories for an alias of hers, ones she laid to rest back in season two.
#leverageposting#leverage#sophie devereaux#particularly that one of or both her parents had to move around a lot for work & so she would change herself to fit in at every new school#or new town etc etc. and that whatever original identity she had was dropped due to some kind of really awful event and her bio family think#she’s dead. eg she got into some kind of extreme legal trouble for the first time & she faked her death & everyone she knew as a kid thinks#she’s dead too. like. astrid wasn’t the first person she left to miss/mourn her.#but also that she was a teen runaway at like age ~16 and pretended to be an adult (like. 18/19) cause theres not much you can do by yourself#as a minor like booking flights or renting an apartment. and so began her first proper alias. and she was a pickpocket until she could fund#her life fully through grifting & cons.#or alternatively her parents died when she was a teen & she was old enough to become an emancipated minor (everyone in lev is an orphan)#and she kind of just fell into crime from there bc she had no one#or perhaps she got married at 17 and realised how fucked it all was and stashed money until she could run away & leave it all behind. that’s#bc of a single vague sentence on john rogers’ blog saying she was married at 17 and in context it was quite possibly a joke or random#hypothetical example but i was like what if???? What If???????#i also like the hc that she’s trans which i’ve seen a few times#in some versions in my mind her parents were okay and in some versions they were awful and in some versions it was so complicated.#i think tara has heard one story and parker or hardison have heard another and nate has never heard any story. he’s never asked.#she is here now and that’s all that needs knowing. and sophie devereaux is her real name in any way it matters.#eliot has also never asked and she asked if he was curious once and he just asked if she was curious about What He Did and that was answer#enough for the both of them. just a mutual agreement not to ask and it actually solidified their bond.#i think she struggled for a long time about whether to tell her new family The Real Story but in much the same way we never hear her birth#name bc it’s not Her anymore… she never gives The Real Story. bc it no longer defines who she is. she’s so much more than whatever happened.#lvg
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Jason who immediately loses respect for people who don't own up to their mistakes vs Annabeth who would rather die than admit she made a mistake
#jason vs annabeth. autism vs npd lol#idk what the outcome is. i don't think they'd fight physically. but jason would get on her ass. and she'd be so fucking pissed abt it#she'd strategize different ways to put him in uncomfortable situations for whatever reason#and he's just vibing through them because he's been uncomfortable his entire life. pretending to be bacon for a monster is not new#anyway jason looking at his dad who's refusing to admit he made some dumb decisions and immediately going this guy is an idiot fuck him#happy talks pjo#npd!annabeth#jason grace#annabeth chase#oh oh annabeth needing everyone to like and trust her and jason's lost respect for her drives her up the fucking wall#she's the only one of the seven who could really be considered friends with all of them and jason's judgy eyes make her want to explode#she 100% rants herself to sleep about things he says. maybe that's where percy and jason's beef arised from#percy recognizing that annabeth is fustrated with jason because jason is blunt and doesn't really know to soften his words.#so now percy is fustrated with jason because annabeth is the source of his personhood right now. meanwhile jason is just vibing oblivious#no social awarenes whatsoever. anyway lol#but oooooo see leo's inferiority complex actually makes him fess up to errors in a way that judges him (jokingly but not really)#even if the error wasn't his fault. but it's his willingness to admit to his mistakes that makes jason really appreciate and trust him#so we have npd!annabeth who can't admit to being wrong because it would kill her ego#and then inferiority complex leo who does admit to being wrong because he hates himself#and when he fucks up he is quick to confess (often in a self-deprecating joke manner) so that no one can say anything that would hurt him#if he kills his ego before other people can even attempt it then he's safe from their judgement in some way#okaaaay bac to studying lol
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decided to quickly redraw/draw over an old (and I mean OLD) GLaDOS drawing. I liked the idea I was going for! It's GLaDOS standing over Cave Johnson's corpse lol. Original drawing under the cut (:
#art#my art#art of duck#portal#portal 2#got distracted while packing and just started looking through all of my old digital art files.#I actually had redrawn this before but I never finished it#GLaDOS#cave johnson#I did a lil thing with the . the chassis. looks kinda like a halo. but also horns? glados be like i can be your angle or ur devil#I have no idea when this is from#I like the idea of making android GLaDOS's hair like Caroline's but choppy like she cut it herself or something#portal fanart#Im a sucker for GLaDOS as a ghost symbolism#she was driven to kill everyone in the facility for what they did to her but she DOESNT EVEN REMEMBER WHAT THAT WAS. until the end of p2 of#its so good. gotta replay portal 2
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Actually. Looking at the chronology. The last time Gideon and Harrow talked alone before the pool scene, Gideon accused Harrow of being a jealous creep for telling her to stay away from Dulcinea.
A whole lot of stupifying things happened in between, but really, it wouldn't be surprising if her first panicked reaction to Harrow disrobing was to think Harrow was making a move on her. Relationship definitely hurtling toward something.
#the locked tomb#gideon the ninth#griddlehark#so much happened those last two days at Canaan House#I lost track of just how much relationship upgrade Gideon and Harrow went through#Gideon goes from insisting Harrow is jealous over her and not envious (guarding something that's hers and not coveting something that isn't)#to lashing out at Harrow in the worst way she can manage without physical violence (threatening to leave her)#to assuming Harrow is a murderer and resolving to kill her herself rather than let anyone else touch her#to finding out Harrow had a good reason for everything she'd done and just didn't trust or respect Gideon enough to tell her#to finding out Harrow's worst secrets and swearing herself to Harrow#....in the span of about. mmmm. three hours? ish?#probably less#depends on how long she was wandering around or with the Sixth really#I'd say someone give that girl a nap but for once she actually got one
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Day 335 | id in alt
Being desperate to end the fight might make you even worse off in the long run, Shoko.
#dailykugisaki#jjk#kugisaki nobara#shoko ieri#ieri shoko#utahime iori#Kugisaki opening her eye not even fully like all the way knowing her shit yet and immediately getting shot with 1 Ml of Adrenaline#Shoko actually regretting her actions for once#Kugisaki probably going through the most insane shit right now she probably cant feel any of her limbs at the moment#dont shoot adrenaline into a fresh out the coma child Shoko#The funniest part is. Shoko didn't train to actually do this medical shit she foes autopsy's bro she dosent know how much the body can#the body can take#Shoko does not know she probably gave Kugisaki more brain damage#Shes just sitting there with a fucked up girl using her technique#Because they BOTH dont know whats going on#utahime is tweaking the fuck out but shes gonna be okay(she'll be thinking about it for years)#Kugisaki was in a state of genuine disability where she had to be cared for by others that didn't know what they were doing#Shoko STILL dosent know. Its not her fault shes used to dealing with corpses#shoko becoming a presudo caretaker of Kugisaki because she feels guilty about this massive fuck up#Shoko probably thought she was just like the higher ups in that moment and had to stare at a wall#Kugisaki wigging out and shes half fucked in a state of limbo because DAMN that idle transfiguration made her believe she DIED#Anything to win the fight against the king of curses y'know#Nobody really knows about what happened except Shoko. Utahime and Kugisaki herself so. And you know theyre not gonna say anything#youd have better chances talking to a rock#why did i make this? my brain spiraled
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what bothers me about horde prime, more than his lazy characterization or his lack of impact on the narrative, is the fact that he is such a bad representation of a cult leader. like,, this is not how cults work. they don’t just insert a chip into you and make you follow their every directive like a robot. real life cults are a lot more terrifying because they use manipulation as a tactic to convince people to join them. it’s not a digital chip that you can remove from your system and suddenly you’re in complete control of yourself. cult survivors have talked about how hard it is to actually unlearn that mindset and start thinking for themselves, how many years it takes to stop feeling guilty for leaving their cult or seeing the toxicity in the leaders they so religiously followed.
sure, hordak and catra have some trauma tied to their experience with horde prime, but most of that is because of the physical torture they went through, rather than their experience of being brainwashed. and it’s fine if horde prime was just some villain and not a genocidal cult leader. but it’s clear that he was written to be a religious authority figure, the execution is just so off.
i know he’s a character in a fantasy world, so he had to use his powers for something. but instead of turning people into robots, he could have shown them a “better world” through his tech, talked them into joining him and forgetting about all their current worries, and then used them as weapons against etheria.
it would have been a lot more impactful and angsty if catra had willingly joined horde prime’s cult so that she could repress her guilt. in fact, it would have been really interesting if horde prime had convinced catra that he would help her repend for all that she did, if she joined his cult. this would have been a lot more comparable to religious guilt and trauma in real life, and it would show that catra actually felt bad for what she did, instead of just looking sad for a while and then continuing to be a shitty person anyway.
#everyday i mourn the character horde prime could have been#he could have actually been representative of toxic religious figures who push unhealthy mindsets#instead of being all “heehee you love adora dont you” he could have been like#“i sense guilt. you’ve done a lot of horrible things and you want to take it all back but you can’t. at least you think you can’t.#but if you join me you can repend for all your sins. dedicate yourself to me and i’ll make sure you’ll never feel like a bad person again.”#and it sounds like escapism because it is#halfway through catra begins to realize this and she has to choose between repressing her guilt#and actually allowing herself to feel guilty so that she can work on being better#and instead of having adora rescue her catra rescues herself by making a hard decision#but alas#spop critical#spop salt#spop#spop discourse#spop criticism#she ra#anti spop#tw religious guilt#tw religious trauma#tw religion#tw cult
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One thing I love about Kim and Jimmys relationship is that from the start they have, like, the opposite of sexual/romantic tension. There’s literally no tension despite the fact they’re definitely not in a relationship, they’re just casually phoning each other late at night for weird robot phone sex that may or may not be a joke and giving each other foot massages and pedicures while venting to one another and getting drunk.
Their first onscreen kiss doesn’t seem at all to be their first actual kiss or their first night together, but it’s also not shown to have been a FWB situation or anything like that. We even see Jimmy on a date with another woman, but mcwexler still just explicitly Is from, like, day one and I like to think and wholeheartedly believe that was the case from when they first met. They just Clicked and didn’t even necessarily feel like they had to Do Anything with it, they were just each others person.
#I also like to think it was Jimmy specifically who craved an actual committed relationship and Kim who struggled#which tbh is. kinda canon.#that she’d be content to coax along like this indefinitely because personal relationships scare her#and it’s not until he’s fully wormed his way into her heart with his cringefail charm#that she realises how much she needs him and then it reaches the point she is literally willing to kill for him#and not only can she not ever care for someone like that again she’s also terrified to let herself#so she finds someone who is kinda nice but super boring and who doesn’t ever give a shit abt her opinion#and yep’s her way through life for a few years#mcwexler
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tag the oc that's most likely to get stuck in a time loop and what kind of time loop it would be
#I feel like Kyana has time loop potential but idk what the exact loop would be#maybe the loop is the entirety of DAO and she keeps getting companions killed/locked into their Bad Endings#and the loop only stops when she manages to get them all to survive the Blight#something something she needs to learn to be a good leader and care about others#unsuccessful loops reset via the archdemon killing her (even if the dark ritual was performed)#Selene gets the classic 'your love interest keeps dying and you try to stop it' time loop#to escape the loop she must Let It Happen (and then it turns out it's fine and everyone survives)#Secret gives me the vibe of someone who knows they're in a time loop but has given up on trying to solve it#she's just going through it. trying everything. keeping herself entertained. trying to stay sane#sometimes she clues Varric in on the looping. sometimes she doesn't#actually maybe her time loop rule is that someone else has to save her from it. nothing she does by herself will work#idk what the exact reset point would be#I'm thinking the Arishok fight maybe. or Meredith#I don't think it would go as far as the Fade#also. after writing Homecoming I did have the thought of a time loop story#with Dorian as the one being trapped and trying to prevent Neil from dying/becoming possessed#maybe in his case he's not really trapped. he can stop anytime he wants but he keeps choosing to go back#the reset point is something Solas-related maybe#herearedragons meta#oc: kyana amell#oc: watcher selene#oc: secret hawke#oc: neilar lavellan#oh. actually. Aqun would be pretty fun to put in a time loop#that runs over some part of DAI and/or Trespasser#Adina is his time loop buddy (the person he usually tells about the loop because she immediately believes him)#idk what his reset/escape condition would be though#maybe in his case it's something purely mechanical#like there's no lesson to be learned it's just a magical anomaly he's trapped on#and on a meta level the 'lesson' is accepting that not everything has a Purpose or a Reason
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by the time you understand your mother it's too late to save her
#my entire childhood was me desperately thinking mum you are a mystery to me mum tell me what youve been through#and now i know her and to know her is to also know what men have done to her#and it breaks my heart because they dont deserve to be remembered but how can you forget the men that have hurt you how can you ever forget#it's not actually too late. she just thinks it is. she doesn't see a womanhood for herself outside of motherhood#and i wish she knew that shes remarkable#even though i was born with all of her pain i carry all of her love
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If Kuboyasu was a butch lesbian and Kaido was a trans guy then their characters and friendship would've been 300% more interesting tbh. A beautiful alternate world where Asou was 40% more goated.
#nopsi nonsense#I just think the gender flavor would be so interesting and then you have Kuboyasu wondering whether she has to perform traditional#femininity to pass as a normie instead of a gangster & try to parallel Teruhashi for a bit before realizing it's not her thing#Going back to her butch roots & deciding to be true to herself#Meanwhile Kaido is using fantasy to cope with gender feelings and actually kinda learns to be a man through Kuboyasu#And gets the courage to stand up to his mom and say his truth and she gets him on hrt#But then has to face the struggle of applying T when he's kind of a weenie & Kuboyasu helping him bc he's like her little bro & best friend#hsfjdlshfks Kuboyasu escorting Kaido to the men's bathroom and standing outside his stall at anyone who looks sideways at them#I know you could hc this but I actually like using canon for most things so au nopsi can have fun with that instead#Butch Kuboyasu
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ruminating on 'the vees died despondent nobodies' thoughts
velvette interrogates vox after she hears him give various conflicting and bombastic accounts on air. a selection of these include: blew his brains out on live television, administered the death penalty for killing his "bitch wife," a tragic accident involving two shetland ponies, dubiously legal iranian yogurts, and a whole lot of cocaine. the actual cause was shockingly ordinary- a heart attack in front of the television, alone, his corpse only recovered after two weeks passed. he was watching a game show and his last mortal regret was never even learning who won, because he died during the commercials.
#vox#velvette#haven't settled on what i think is a satisfying cause of death for velvette#running on 'a fight that escalated with her shitty then-boyfriend while trying to film something'#mostly bc i'm thinking of her recounting this to vox and telling him the thing she most regrets is that he was ugly as sin#and now his mugshot is permanently stapled to news of her death#but i'm not mega attached to this or anything#(the thing she ACTUALLY most regrets#is that the people she knew probably took more interest in how she died than who she was alive#that the most notable thing about her was something she didn't even do#and even the tragedy of her death to those who heard about it is in how bitterly commonplace it is)#wait this is actually thematically perfect. because in hell she's STILL in some ways defined by her proximity to two men#/yes/ her followers and fans are captivated by her separate from voxval. but she's inescapably regarded through the lens of the vees#both in the 'what's the niche velvette fills in the vees' sense but also through her relationships to val and vox#she's velvette. but she's never Just Velvette. she is always One Of The Vees#who she is to vox and valentino is what Velvette(tm) is#she can play every role to the public. their beleaguered 3rd wheel. their Sane Friend. partner (business). partner (romantic/sexual)#how do i fit that alongside:#'the people of hell like velvette because she's unfiltered. raw. authentic. mean girl who says what she wants w/o caring'#with a hammer and a lot of grit#i do think that's usually what she thinks of herself. at least consciously and these actually aren't mutually exclusive#you know how i said i'm not super attached to this backstory. whoops i have convinced myself of it!#if not the above specifics the 'the most remembered thing about velvette's life is how she died' angle#as it turns out this post is actually about velvette. i need to think about my evil babygirls Themes#i had something to say about vox and gameshows but thats enough footnotes for now i think
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im so obsessed w them that I made fanart AND my own playlist
#気になってる人が男じゃなかった#the guy she wasn't interested in wasn't a guy at all#gays bonding over 90s grunge and dad rock#no like u don't understand I'm a wlw who was raised on rock and blues since as far back as I can remember#reading this manga has been SO en#SO enjoyable#I can't believe I didn't get into it sooner!!!!! And I love the NOFX Green used all through the series omg#Also re the fanmix#I know Aya and Mitsuki are super into 90's grunge and hard rock specifically#but I added in some diff stuff from betwee#Also I tried to the playlist follow the chronology of the story and might continue to add to it/edit 🤔#Anyway I'm really interested in the way both charas relate to music? I feel like they both see music as a place for enjoyment and discovery#but Aya is quite aware of and#secure in her emotions so uses music as an outlet for them: a way to arrange and communicate how she already knows how she's feeling#while Mitsuki seems more to use music as a way to actually understand both the world around her#but also herself... I love them both so muc#god my tags are horrific but writing tags on the tumblr app is literal hell#aya oosawa#mitsuki koga
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i don’t talk about bridgerton on here but just to clarify. i will not be having ANY eloise hate on this account. i will bite.
#eloise bridgerton they could never make me hate you!!#addressing the normal talking points one by one to get them sorted:#- no i don’t care that eloise called pen some names after the discovery. she was devastated and furious.#she can apologise in the future but in the moment of course she said it#- yes pen did write about eloise as a way to save her but that doesn’t mean it hasn’t possibly ruined eloise’s life#- similarly: eloise isn’t (just) angry that she was written about. daphne also went through whistledown and it very much terrified her#so have many other women including marina#- eloise is betrayed because she told pen everything and is realising pen told her nothing#(and she’s probably thinking about any secrets she might have said to her best friend that could now be used against the ton and her family)#- as claudio said: being regency gossip girl isnt a moral girlboss thing its deeply harmful tbh#- pen did have reasons to become whistledown! that doesn’t mean that she’s innocent or right!#- eloise isnt now friends with cressida to spite pen lmao she’s alone and scared and cressida was the last person who offered her friendship#she has no idea how to manage society by herself#(and she needs someone to improve the reputation of her and her family)#- im also convinced she has other ulterior motives for befriending cressida. like she’s keeping an eye on her or smth#- eloise didn’t just ignore anything pen said and that’s why she only just figured it out. pen deliberately didn’t speak like lw to hide it#the moment she did eloise was like huh that’s weird she doesn’t normally talk like that. and THATS when she figured it out#- eloise just found out her best friend has betrayed her and been hiding this massive secret#but she hasn’t told anyone. not even her own family. im not hearing out any accusations of HER of being disloyal#- also pen clearly wasn’t that upset at writing about eloise bc the moment eloise and colin upset her she went straight back to it lmao#side note but no i don’t think the queen is going to name her the ‘emerald’ or anything because she’s suddenly in the spotlight#eloise is tbh the only debutante she actually consistently recognised (for good or bad)#a new dress is not going to be interesting for charlotte to change her whole tradition#tl;dr i love eloise and i will die on this hill#eloise bridgerton#bridgerton
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