#thought i cooked fr 💀

[91divoc]

🫵🤯⁉️ red bastard evolution

(aka the progress ive made from my first very drawing of James to one of my most recent)

shits wild not really

[grogumaximus]

[rubra-wav]

vox..glowing........ 😋 ....what if his dick glows..glowstick cum.

NSFW OBV

NAURRRRR 💀

I was writing some angsty stuff for another ask and this has me howling straight up LMAO.

I have thought about this in passing, though. I won't lie.

Does it light up? Does it glow blue in places and does his cum glow in the dark like some fuckshit glowstick? Does it vibrate?

I have some unhinged asf ideas about this man's body fluids I didn't let loose in the other post I made about his anatomy because it was sfw...

However.... in my personal opinion..

... yes. 🗣

[sadboytristan]

Man, everytime someone likes that post, the one where my SMUG ASS WROTE,

"RALPH WRECKING CONFIDENCE"

I was so proud, nah—

Cause I was PLEASED AS PUNCH, to be INCOHERENT🗣

and man, that shit has mE WHEEZING❗️

Cause nah, is that? Man was that how smug Felix felt?? When his dUM--

When he called Ralph, ✨️BIG NOSE✨️

Every time yall like that post, where I straight up R O A S T E D the sHIT OUTTA HIM, only to find out I AM HIM,,, yall I swear to god,,,

that KEEPS ME– it, HUMBLES ME🤡

[theeio]

spoon I just want to say thank you so much for your sketch pages and doodles. for someone like me who sometimes struggles with artist self esteem, sometimes it's hard to remember that art doesn't have to be perfect. I think that's true no matter your skill (bc tbh my sketches are pond scum compared to yours). sometimes art can be art because you want to make it, not to make a flawless final product. sometimes I want to sketch just to sketch, and that's ok. thanks for reminding me of that.

oh my goodness, hi!!! thank you so, so much for taking the time to write this ;-; i struggle so much between keeping my work more palatable while acknowledging that my scribbly sketches are integral to my artist identity, so this truly means so much to me🥺😭😭💖💖💖

sketchbooks to me is the place where i can truly express myself, however i want, like a diary with a code only i understand. i feel like many artists don’t realise how truly liberating it is to pour out themselves somewhere without judgement or pressures for perfection from the outside world.

i promise you, your art is better than you think! and the art you think looks like “pond scum” now, you will look back years later with fascination and pride. whatever art you have made, no matter how it looks, however incomplete, messy, rough-it is something that is yours. then and now, there is so much value in your art, and yourself by extension, no matter what stage you are at.

i am so happy, proud, and deeply honoured that my silly scribbles could bring you to such a beautiful realisation about art. i’m wishing you all the best (and all the fun) in your art journey! take care of yourself and thank you so much again♥️♥️♥️

heres a few pages of my latest sketchbook for the funsies! tried including a mix of stuff i was happy with, most others im more insecure about, but all have something interesting going for it nonetheless

[lewisvinga]

no me importa | lewis hamilton x fem! reader

summary; when a recent video exposes y/n and lewis’ relationship, other people think they can comment on their age gap, but at the end of the day y/n and lewis will always love each other

fc; cindy kimberly

warnings; age gap , mentions of 18+ themes

notes; loosely based off of mayor que yo by wisin & yandel and mayor que usted by natti natasha, daddy yankee, wisin & yandel :p , also reader is kinda implied as latina but it’s not important

me 🤝 writing smau’s abt dating older men

masterlist !

liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, and 1,020,047 others!

yourusername: made vegan alfredo for me n bae, definitely went into a food coma after

tagged; lewishamilton, roscoelovescoco

lewishamilton: wifey material

yourusername: yes i do the cooking yes i do the cleaning 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

lewishamilton: it was amazing, love ❤️

yourusername: i put my blood sweat n tears into that alfredo, it better have been damn well amazing😕 ( thank u love💗💗)

username: so this is a confirmation?

username: girl did u not see the video, they were shoving their tongue down each others throat ???😦😦

username: cute but age gap is still icky to me 😕

username: tbh dating someone 13 years older than me is weird asf 😭

rosecoelovescoco: thank’s you’s

yourusername: ur welcome if u stop chasing lunita around 😕

lewishamilton: he is just a baby!

yourusername: so is my gatita lunita , she’s a scaredy cat , literally !!😞

username: she’s so pretty in everything what😞

username: 😍😍😍

lilymhe: cook for me next? 😏😏

yourusername: give me the time n place😉

username: ok but her learning how to make vegan pasta for lewis?? is so??? cute ????🥹🥹

username: he’s a grown man n 13 years older, he can cook for himself

username: it’s never that serious

liked by username, username, and 93,038 others!

f1upadates: Lewis Hamilton and Y/n L/n were both spotted at the British Fashion Awards after confirming their relationship. Thoughts on the new grid couple?

tagged; lewishamilton, yourusername

username: the fact she designed her outfit n did her hair and makeup 😩🙌

username: they’re such a good looking couple even if he’s like 13 years older than her 😭

username: i need her skincare routine!😩

username: be 13 years younger than your boyfriend helps!

username: she’s so desperate that she needs to date someone older than her? how embarrassing 💀💀

username: her parents must be so disappointed…

username: why? shes a model w her own fashion line dating a 7x (8x) world champion, they’ll be fine😭

username: y’all coming at her for dating someone older like you wouldn’t date your faves who are also older!! she’s just living the y/n life

username: REAL

yourusername posted to their story!

trans. for lyrics ; and i don’t care if i’m younger than you

liked by yourusername, georgerussell63, and 1,230,937 others!

lewishamilton: heard she likes señores [sirs]

tagged; yourusername

yourusername: sir lewis hamilton 🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️🧎‍♀️

landonorris: i can’t take you calling him sir every 5 seconds pls stop i beg

georgerussell63: ‘yes, sir’ THERE ARE CHILDREN HERE ( lando )

landonorris: wait-

yourusername: sorry not sorry, unless you’re a sir you wouldn’t get it 😁

lewishamilton: what she said😁

yourusername: mi amor, te quiero 💗 [my love, i love you]

lewishamilton: i love you🩷

username: idk if i want him or her tbh🙇‍♀️🙇‍♀️

username: she’s so😍😍

username: i’d call him sir any day i get her fr

username: they’re such an attractive couple😩

username: how’d lewis bag her im being so fr

username: bc they’re both fine as fuck 😍

username: mis padres [my parents]

username: mami y papi fr [mommy & daddy]

liked by lewishamilton, lilymhe, and 1,023,044 others!

yourusername: no me importa q usted sea mayor q yo. [i don’t care if you’re older than me]

tagged; lewishamilton

lewishamilton: wait, when did you take the second picture?

yourusername: baby i got a whole folder of those type of pictures, i take them every chance i get

username: SHARE W THE PUBLIC HELLO??

yourusername: y/n.jpg but it’s just pics of lewis’ back

lewishamilton: i love you❤️

yourusername: i love youuuu💗

username: the hand pics i’m going insane 😵‍💫🥴

username: ou that back pic, i’m going ferallll

lilymhe: omg bae stop posting pics of me 🙈🙈🙈

yourusername: ur too cute my bad😪

lewishamilton: stop stealing my gf

alex_albon: gf stealer !

username: the 3rd pic🥹🥹

username: yall need a third??

username: i can take them both ( not in a fight )

georgerussell63: if only he could look at me like he looked at u in the last picture 🕊️🕊️🕊️

lewishamilton: i will if you look like y/n

yourusername: my bad i’m too cute 😁

carmenmmundt: merc double dates now??

yourusername: uh duh, merc wags stick together 🫶

[hamilando]

ੈ✩ Sainz Jr’s Jr? (smau) ੈ✩

pairing : carlos saint x fem reader

summary : the latest addition to the sainz family !

tw : fluff

fc: Erva Arslan *she is so pretty-*

a/n : thank you so much to @animeandf1lover for suggesting this ! Also, in now way have I tried to offend any religion, I do not have much knowledge and tried my best to include a Muslim reader according to the request ! The photos are all from Erva’s Instagram.

·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ･ ✩ ･ﾟ ･ﾟ·:｡･ﾟﾟ

liked by carlosainz55, charlesleclerc, alexandramieux and 156,845 others

y/nsainz Ferrari wife attendance for Silverstone !! @ carlosainz55

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user1 she is so pretty!!

user2 I NEED HER CLOSET !!

user3 I love how simple yet elegant her outfits look 😞

charlesleclerc pls tell me you will make the baklava for us !

y/nsainz only if we get a podium !!

user4 she is carlos's wife ? ( new fan here 🫷🏻)

user5 yup, married for almost a year now, they met in Abu Dhabi Gp !

alexandramieux Waiting for the baklava !!!

y/nsainz anyday for you love !!

user6 I need her cooking skills 🤜🏻

user7 carlos homie got lucky fr

carlosainz55 I can't concentrate on the race when I have a wife looking this good ❤️

y/nsainz you better or the couch looks like an amazing option

landonorris my lovely sister in law 🫶🏻

y/nsainz you should visit us in Spain, I will make you the best food 🫶🏻 landonorris booking my tickets 🤜🏻

liked by landonorris, carlosainz55, charlesleclerc and 178,937 others

y/nsainz a year of red and hues ❤️

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user1 if only couple goals had a face 🫷🏻

charlesleclerc can’t believe it’s been a year since you joined Ferrari Family !!

liked by y/nsainz

user2 and in a year they will leave the Ferrari family too 😭

user3 don’t remind me 😭🥹

landonorris Y/N, please find me a wife too, even I want a post like this ☺️

y/nsainz Lando, you are too young! landonorris I AM THE SAME AGE AS YOU WHEN YOU GOT MARRIED TO THAT IDIOT ! y/nsainz point.

user4 lando’s inner thoughts be speaking-

user5 did y/n indirectly call Carlos an idiot ? 💀

user6 he is one though 🤷🏻‍♂️

carlosainz55 and to many more ❤️

like by y/nsainz

maxverstappen1 Congratulations 🙌🏻

liked by y/nsainz

francisca.gnomes can’t believe it’s been a year since the most beautiful wedding 🥹

liked by y/nsainz

liked by landonorris, carlossainz55, charlesleclerc, and 1,837,389 others

y/nsainz Elyas Carlos Sainz 🌟

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liked by carlossainz55, charlesleclerc, and 837,927 others

y/nsainz Baby daddy duties 💪🏻

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lewishamilton good to see he is taking care of you 💛

y/nsainz ofc, we wouldn't want to turn the threaten to reality, also thank you so much letting roscoe spend time with me lewishamilton roscoe is just a call away !

landonorris BEST UNCLE ATTENDANCE 🙌🏻

charlesleclerc oh hell nah y/nsainz now before this blows up, you both are amazing uncles !!

landonorris just bought him clothes

charlesleclerc just bought him a van-cleef landonorris just bought him a mini racing car charlesleclerc just bought him a Ferrari carlossainz55 mate, let my son grow some legs before he steps on any of those two cars 😊

y/nsainz the audacity of you two to not buy anything for the mother! Max, you are the best ❤️

maxverstappen1 it was all Kelly’s idea 🙌🏻 kellypiquet you deserve it Y/N! landonorris oh god. Max back off

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liked by charlesleclerc, carlossainz55 and 1,832,912 others

y/nsainz video calls ft. Uncle Charles

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scuderiaferrari The uncle and dad raising the future world champion !

liked by y/nsainz

user1 the same champion whose father you kicked out 👀

user2 is it possible to be jealous of a 3 month old ?

user3 no. Having Carlos Saina as your father, Y/N Sainz as your mother and the whole f1 grid as your family, is certainly soemthing to be jealous of 🤷🏻‍♂️

charlesleclerc Elyas first word would definitely be Uncle !

y/nsainz get in line, Charles Leclerc.

user4 oh gawd, the full name and FULL STOP !

carlossainz55 my life ❤️

liked by y/nsainz

[livelaughloveluffy]

confession - roronoa zoro

a/n: i usually struggle with the zoro fics a bit, but this is the first one that just instantly flowed out of me 😭💀 while i don't typically headcannon zoro as the jealous type (bro has a secure attachment style fr 😭😭) i do see him getting jealous when it comes to a certain blonde cook getting too close for his comfort, so thats what this is; zosan rivalry my beloved 💗 (just kiss already losers)

nothing but fluff here 💗

---------------------------------------------------------------------

when you first joined the straw hats, zoro never expected to fall for you. sure, you were a laundry list of all things amazing, in fact, the more he thought about it, the two of you would be a perfect match. but, he wasn't that kind of guy, the relationship type, and you were such a catch. he knew it was only a matter of time before you found someone.

but for whatever reason, zoro couldn't help but find himself watching you whenever he saw you on the deck. whether you were lounging in the sun hanging out with nami and robin reading, playing with luffy and chopper, helping catch fish for dinner, dancing to brooke's music, his eyes just naturally gravitated towards you.

the swordsman couldn't exactly but his finger one the source of this new infatuation. but he certainly wasn't going to start thinking about it, hoping this problem would just fade with time.

it's only natural to be curious in a new crewmate... right?

•♡•

during one of your first months with the new crew, you couldn't bring yourself to fall asleep. being frustrated with the helpless tossing and turning every couple minutes, you just decided to get some fresh air, maybe the ocean breeze and night-sky will help lull you to sleep.

for whatever reason, the second you left the girl's dorm, your eyes were instantly drawn to the crow's nest. if you remembered correctly, it was zoro's turn to be on night watch. might as well join him, as it was quite preferable to the alternative, sitting on the dark deck alone.

as you opened the hatch to the crow's nest, you could hear zoro begin to grab one of his swords, ready to pull it from the scabbard. "sorry, it's just me. i couldn't sleep, i figured i would keep you some company."

the swordsman looked at you, half skeptical and half amusement danced in his eyes. before he could send you away, you pulled out a bottle of sake "i brought some refreshments too." and with that, he glanced away, allowing you come sit next to him.

•♡•

before he knew it, your time together on night watch became a routine, initially it started with just silently drinking together and stargazing, to quiet conversations, to the occasional jokes, and without knowing the swordsman had started to become really attached to this time alone with you.

he started looking forward to quiet nights in the crow's nest, sake in hand, the sweet smell of your perfume, and the starry nights coupled with the ambience of the crashing waves beneath you both.

and it wasn't just the green-haired swordsman who felt this way. you had also begun to really treasure this time with him. you had seen as zoro's begrudging toleration had slowly bloomed into comfort in your presence.

wanting to do something for the grumpy swordsman, you took it upon yourself to surprise him with something special.

•♡•

something had changed.. it was a small change, but a noticeable one. for a reason unbeknown to him, a certain blonde appeared by your side more than usual. the cook seemed to sick to you like a barnacle, whenever the two of you weren't on the deck, instead of your usual spots, you were found in the kitchen.

at first, this wasn't initially a big deal. it's not like the two of you were dating or anything, you were allowed to hang out with anyone you wanted. this knowledge, however, did nothing to elevate the sense of dread in his gut whenever he saw you and sanji whispering to each other, and eventually sneaking off to the kitchen, reappearing hours later.

he just couldn't help but start to feel the small stabbing itch of jealousy when he saw you with that stupid curly-browed cook. at first, he expected it. zoro knew sanji well enough to expect him to act any differently... but what he didn't expect was seeing you look... not bothered.

•♡•

he watched from a distance as the blonde made his way over to you, a little too fast for his liking, then as you greeted the man with a smile, nodding enthusiastically to whatever he had said, and now following him back to the kitchen.

then he tried to ignore it. ignorantly (and stupidly hopeful) that this was something he would just get over and used to. it's totally fine, it makes sense you would want to build closer relationships with members of the crew, so why did it bother him so much to see you do exactly that with sanji.

he truly didn't see the appeal of the love-sick cook. sure, he made great food. but the man can barely function around women, always itching to get in their pants, and it made the swordsman sick. he couldn't help but worry that sanji would try and do something like that to you... and he's not sure if you would decline advances from the cook..

•♡•

one night, after way too many hours tossing and turning trying, but unsuccessfully attempting to sleep, zoro decided he might as well just stay up anyways. maybe a distraction of sake and the stars will be enough to soothe this anxiety. however, he had no more sake left in the shared boys room, needing to make his way to the kitchen.

what he didn't notice leaving the boy's room was a certain blonde head not in his bed. it wasn't until the light pouring from the kitchen window that his stomach began to sank.

opening the door to the kitchen, trying his best to be casual, he watched as you and sanji practically ricocheted away from each other.

"marimo, what do you think-"

"zoro! it's so late! what are you doing up?"

he watched for a moment as you too floundered to attempt to explain the situation, the blush on your and the cook's face told him all he needed to know.

"couldn't sleep. just getting some sake. you can do... whatever the hell you guys were doing.." he couldn't bare to look at you. not because he was mad at you, but because he was mad at himself.

if only he had said something, did something, tried to tell you how he felt... but it appeared it was too little to late.

•♡•

he grabbed more sake then he initially intended to, planning to drink his frustration away until sunrise, to then hopefully be over it by the following morning. what he didn't anticipate was a hand suddenly grabbing his, stopping him in his tracks, he didn't need to turn to see who it was that held him there.

he didn't move a muscle to turn to see you, he couldn't promise he had anything nice to say.. so you held his hand as you walked to face him. looking up to meet his sharp eyes, in a soft voice you asked him "do you want some company?"

he replied with an empty and sarcastic tone, "don't you have a shitty cook to entertain instead?"

"it's not like that, zo. i swea-" you said, attempting to explain the situation, before he cut you off.

he could feel his blood slowly start to boil, his voice slightly beginning to raise, "really? it's not? doesn't look that way."

"zoro, wait please-" you begged, tears starting to well up in your eyes.

"wait for what? never mind, the fact that i've been in love with for months-" he paused, realizing his mistake. clamping his mouth closed in a tight line. instantly, all the pent-up jealousy and irritation dissipate from his body. nothing but the overwhelming feeling that he just fucked up forever, he could help but sigh and accept the consequences.

he couldn't meet your eyes as he muttered "you know what, just forget i said anything. whatever makes you happy." dropping your hand, frustrated and embarrassed, he started to pick up his feet again, making his way towards the crow's nest.

"i love you too, you idiot!" you shout at him.

and the next thing you knew, he was grabbing your arm and pulling you into his chest, wrapping his arms around your hips as tightly as he could. it wasn't until you were totally enveloped in the swordsman, did he finally ask you "what were you doing with that stupid cook anyways?"

you pulled your head away from him slightly, just enough to look at his eyes. how you had been blind to it for so long, you truly had no idea, but the realization made you burst out in giggles.

"oh my god, is that what this was about? actually its kind of funny, sanji was teaching me how to bake so i could surprise you" still a bit breathless from all the giggles, you continued "if you had waited like two more days, i was going to tell you that i had feelings for you and bring you cookies."

if you squinted, you would have seen the tiniest blush spread across the swordsman's face. "oh.... i still don't like him though."

you teasingly rolled your eyes at zoro, and with a smile said "you're an idiot.. but you're my idiot"

---------------------------------------------------------------------

a/n: (i noticed while proofreading that my chronic insomnia has snuck its way into my fics, hence why no one can get some goddamn rest 💀💀 so forgive me if that's a reoccurring thing, if i could sleep, my characters would too 💀)

a/n: enjoyed this fic? check out my masterlist!!

[channelinglament]

When you hadn't logged in for a few days

Ft. Diasomnia (💀)

Summary: Basically you hadn't logged in twst for a while now (could be 2 days or more) for whatever reason. But sadly you didn't know, that your game is sentient.

Tw: yandere, bad grammar, death, murder, religious themes.

🐀 (it's me, the anon-) @writingforatwistedworld

Lilia

Plz forgive this world that is full of sinners-

Fr prays and slays (people)

Alright, let's begin on how it happened:

Lilia was as always waiting for your return. He made himself look presentable, and stayed nearby ramshackle to greet you when you log in (aka when you get weekly stuff like gems and etc)

You didn't come back that day, sadly.

So what does our dear fae do?

Pray. A lot.

He is afraid that he or someone has somehow wronged you.

We're you busy?

Were they not praying hard enough?

Did he need to kill someone-?

And like that, he tried to sleep.

The same was on second day.

But when the third day (afternoon actually) comes, oh he is going insane.

This world is so full of sin! It is filled with sinners to the brim isn't it? That's why you aren't coming back, he's sure of it!

So, the massacre started. You can't tell me otherwise. He prays that you come back, while he slays those, he deems sinners.

If it's for you, he's ready to starts/wage a war again.

Malleus

Congrats, it's the end of the world!

Trust me, if you logged in right at that moment, you would have the longest log in in your history.

Unlike Lilia, he immediately panicked. While you weren't around, the weather was terrible.

A few people probably died because of the thunder

He prays, and prays hard.

On the second day he tries to use his magic to see what you're doing (your camera)

If you're playing another game then he immediately destroys(burns) the world.

If you're busy, tries to wait.

If talking to someone, the first option happens aswell

On third day it's the end of the world. Literally.

Unless you decide to log in, at that exact moment, say bye-bye to everyone alive except a few faes and maybe people.

Silver

Understands that you may be busy.

But still prays nonetheless. (He was raised by Lilia, a cute lunatic after all)

Honestly is afraid that someone might've hurt you. What if you're in danger and he doesn't know about it??

He's supposed to be your knight in shining armor, protect you with his life. What if you're in danger rn and he cannot do anything about it???! (Not like could've helped even if you were, he's in game. But he could've told Malleus or Lilia, then you'd be in game sooner than expected)

Similarily to Lilia, starts massacring people calling them sinners.

But I feel like it's at the end of 2nd day? Stealthily btw

He was sleeping, then heard noises. People were talking about you and how they thought you abandoned them.

He was angry and uhh

Made ketchup for Lilia to cook.

Even if you did abandon them, it's not your fault! But he's sure you didn't, they probably just needed to get rid of sinners that have wronged you and made you upset!

Sebek

Screams

Shocked

Prays

And then

Starts giving you offerings.

Since the day 1

He definitely needs to try harder! Everyone needs!

The reason you're not here is because they're not praying hard enough! They're not offering you what you would like! Of course you won't come back if they won't!

Literally kills everyone left and right.

And offers them to you.

Negative two out of ten, would not recommend.

Fr, he doesn't think that it could be 'cuz you're busy. Probably you're offended that they haven't devoted themselves to you completely.

He wishes that everyone would be like them, on valley of thorns. But sadly, some see you as an equal or just an all knowing entity. Or even worse, but he doesn't talk about Shaftlands. At least some nations are good.

But he still thinks they're wrong in thinking you can have flaws too.

It's their fault for you leaving them!

[myysaints]

sugardaddy fernando alonso with a controversial age gap 👀🥲

°˖ ⊹ ꒰ FA14 ꒱ PAPER RINGS ─ FERNANDO ALONSO

FERNANDO ALONSO x f!sugar baby!reader

⌗︙・ summary — you and fernando soft launch your relationship

genre — fluff, socmed au, fc: bbyambi on ig

notes — hi guysss sorry for being mia! i'm back and have a ton of fics in queue, so get ready :) i had a ton of fun writing this, just some lighthearted fluff of nando showing off his girl. hope you enjoy! apologies for the google translated spanish, i tried my best :,)

www.instagram.com

fernandoalo_oficial

Liked by lance_stroll, aussiegrit, yourusername, and 1,239,447 others

fernandoalo_oficial   Thanks to boss for the great night. #BeYourOwnBOSS

view all 92,410 comments

aussiegrit   Looking sharp!

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial

user1   SOFT LAUNCH HELLOOOOO?????

user2   someone cooked here….

user3   the fact that his girl probably had to teach him how to soft launch 😭😭

user4   omfg youre so right… and she looks so young too he probably had no idea what soft launching even means 💀

user5   idk is anyone else kinda weirded out like… shes so young

user6   Bffr you can barely see her face and even then they’re two consenting adults

yourusername   oh la la! fancy 🥂

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial

yourusername

Liked by chloestroll, and 41,201 others

yourusername   Date night

view all 2,419 comments

chloestroll   gorgeous girl

yourusername   all you mama

user1   angellll omfg

user2   why is everyone and their mother soft launching ????

user3   bf reveal WHEN

user4   lol wouldn’t it be funny if her man was fernando

user5   lmfao how did you even get to that conclusion user4   i mean fernando soft launched his gf yesterday user6   lol why do i see it.. and the girl in his pic is wearing a similar dress to y/n…. user7   yall r insane jajaja

yourusername added to their story!

fernandoalo_oficial

Liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, aussiegrit, and 1,902,335 others

fernandoalo_oficial   “Dump”.

view all 972,104 comments

yourusername   🐈

fernandoalo_oficial   🐱 user1   so they flirting in the comments now huh….

user2   ENOUGH WITH THE SOFT LAUNCHING !!!! TELL US HER NAME

user3   it’s yourusername for sure user4   yeah lol check her highlights she posted the same exact flowers two days ago

user5   i just cant get over the age gap shes too young for him

user6   how do u guys even know her age??? user7   i mean she looks pretty obviously young or younger than him lmfao

user8   DID YALL SEE THE NEW ARTICLE ABOUT Y/N…

user9   WHAT ARTICLE

www.myysaints.com

www.twitter.com

www.instagram.com

fernandoalo_oficial added to their story!

(Enjoy yourself, my queen)

yourusername

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial, chloestroll, and 189,229 others

yourusername   yeah he loves spoiling me, so what?

view all 97,196 comments

chloestroll   Girls outing when??? 🥺

yourusername   i’ll text u !!!

user1   WHO ELSE CAME HERE AFTER FERNANDOS STORY

user2   literally the way i RAN to the comments omfg

user3   PERIOD tell the haters girl

user4   pretty rich and has a hot bf…. shes living the dream life fr 😭

user5   more like her bf is rich 💀 shes such a gold digger lmfao user6   literally like all this proves is that shes with him for the money user7   yall stay pressed lmfao talk about fan behaviour user8   Fr like who cares 😐 Clearly Fernando is ok with her spending his money

yourusername

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial, francisca.cgomes, chloestroll, and 201,948 others

yourusername   finally at the age where i can properly have a midlife crisis #happy25

view all 112,416 comments

fernandoalo_oficial   Happy birthday mi princessa, you deserve all the flowers and gifts in the world. Te amo.

yourusername   love you forever, always yours xx

francisca.cgomes   Did Fernando bake the cake?

yourusername   it was a joint effort, i tried to salvage it with the frosting 😭

chloestroll   noooo I thought your birthday wasn’t for another week! I haven’t got your present yet….

yourusername   it is next week chlo!! me and fernando just celebrated early since he’s got back to back races on my birthday week :( chloestroll   Oh thank god… That I didn’t get it mixed up i mean! But it’s okay we’ll spend your birthday together gorgeous!! yourusername   😽😽 fernandoalo_oficial   Hey watch it chloestroll 😠

user1   nando really showing his age with those emojis huh 😭

user2   SHES ONLY 25?????? wtf do they even have in common…

user3   no literally like what the fuck do they even talk about when theyre together user4   you guys make it sound like hes an actual fossil bruh they can have regular ass convos together you know 💀💀            Liked by yourusername

user5   ngl the age gap is kinda icky but theyre growing on me istg 😭😭

user6   fr nando better WIFE HER UP !!!! 🗣🗣🗣

yourusername added to their story!

yourusername

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial, chloestroll, landonorris, and 301,419 others

yourusername   reunited!

view all 124,501 comments

fernandoalo_oficial   🍝🍝

Liked by yourusername

fernandoalo_oficial   mi princessa

yourusername   thank you papi ;)

user1   theyre being sickeningly cute in the comments ohmygod

user2   what a great night to take a bath with my toaster!!!

user3   if you look closely you can see me ramming my head into the wall….

user4   THE IT COUPLE !!!!!

fernandoalo_oficial

Liked by yourusername, charles_leclerc, aussiegrit, and 991,303 others

fernandoalo_oficial   My lucky charm 🍝🍀

view all 781,420 comments

fernandoalo_oficial   🍀 = Basil 😂😂

yourusername   you’re such a dinosaur omfg fernandoalo_oficial   🦖

user1   Mom come pick me up…. They’re flirting in the comments again….

user2   theyre so cute it makes me actually sick to my stomach

user3   Love how everyone switched up on them 💀 anyways i been a supporter since day 1!!!

user4   she posted that tweet and shut the haters up fr!!!

www.twitter.com

yourusername

Liked by fernandoalo_oficial, chloestroll, aussiegrit, and 814,985 others

yourusername   i like shiny things but i’d marry you with paper rings 💍  it’s you and me together forever my love, thank you for the best birthday ever!

view all 291,679 comments

aussigrit   Congrats you two!

Liked by yourusername

chloestroll   So excited to be your bridesmaid 🥹 Sending all my love to you and Nando!

yourusername   thank uuu chlo!

lewishamilton   🎉🎉

yourusername   thanks lewis! we gonna see roscoe at the wedding? roscoelovescoco   You betcha 🐶

user1   SO SHE WAS TROLLING US THE WHOLE TIME

user2   the way my heart actually stopped working for a moment when she tweeted that… girl u are SICK

Liked by yourusername

user3   PARENTS !!!! PA 👏 RENTS 👏

fernandoalo_oficial   Forever my girl ❤️

yourusername   forever yours ❤️

[why4anne]

Daylight

Part: 5/?

Pairing: Charles Leclerc x Reader

Category: Social Media au

Summary: Follow the love story of a global pop icon and a monegasque F1 driver

Face claim: Taylor Swift (Singing) + others

Masterlist

2021

According to a source close to the couple, they had a huge fight following the Abu Dhabi Grand Prix this weekend. Apparently, Leclerc was more than dissatisfied with his race results after ending the 2021 season with a 10th place finish. The Ferrari driver seemed unhappy with L/N's lack of attendance during the season and in his opinion, she should've been more supportive and attended more races to cheer him on. To which Y/N responded that he knew that she was going to be busy due to her music career when they started dating. After going back and fourth, screaming at each other, the couple called it quits during the heat of the fight. After this L/N could be seen leaving their shared hotel room and going to the airport, alone.

A picture of Y/N L/N at the Abu Dhabi airport, accompanied by her assistant and her bodyguard.

The couple have been one of the most popular celebrity couples since they started dating in 2018, following L/N's breakup with footballer Neymar and fans have been very invested throughout the years. The same fans are now going crazy on social media, trying to figure out if this is true. The couple have yet to comment on these rumors but it seems as if all the facts are lining up. What do you think? Is this a temporary breakup in the heat of the moment or will it stick?

charles_leclerc

liked by pierregasly, scuderiaferrari and 1 339 581 others

charles_leclerc: Not the end that I wanted but now I have to recharge and do better next time around

view comments:

yukiskitchen: Ummm..? The double meaning in the caption??

- icemanfan221: I thought I was the only one who noticed!!

scuderiaferrari: Next season!💪

liked by charles_leclerc

- Leclerc_things: Help! They are almost as delulu as I am😭

koalakevin: Y/N didn't like this post...

- jojogasly: I know🤧😭

- safetycar238: Divorced parents fr😭

slaybastianvettel: My man is unlucky in more ways than one

yn_enjoyer: So this is it then???

- hoverboard_yn: I refuse to believe it until they officially make a statement💀

yourusername:

liked by badgalriri, beyonce and 8 403 693 others

yourusername: Not a lot going on at the moment

view comments:

ynfirstborn: Mother is cooking!!!

ynsbicykle: If they did break up I just know this next album is going to be fire af!!🔥🔥

- ladyyn: no because fr!!

campyn: *whipps out a bottle of whine* tell me more girl!

y/charlesshipper20: Everyone: excited over this post. Me: grieving

- ynheidi: me too girl, me too😖

- summersault_yn: I refuse to belive in love anymore

Tag-list: @mindflay3r @karmabyfernando @lightdragonrayne 

[alexxncl]

‼️NIGHTBRINGER LESSON 47 SPOILERS‼️

masterlist | all lessons | season 3 | lesson 46 | lesson 48.1 | lesson 48.2

mammon just like me fr 😭 him being a giggly, clumsy drunk is so cute i'm gonna kms

why were the only options about mammon's speech "nah it was shit" and "i thought it was gonna be shit but it was fine" like ?? 😭

am i the only one who had faith in my man ???? /lh

:((((((( i love them sm. one grandpa worried about another

also simeon's growth makes me happy. we know how much he hates to seem vulnerable and how adamant he is to insist that he's fine when he's clearly not

i feel like i relate to him a lot in that manner and i'm pretty sure a lot of other people do, too

NO SATAN ILY BUT GO AWAY

me and the devs gon fight bc i KNEWWWW this would happen bc they wouldn't give it to us that easily

see here they go again

they say they hate each other but are each other's biggest supporters AND biggest instigators

someone take him away from the food I BEG

need i remind you, he KNOWS he's a bad cook. it's canon. so why the FAWK does he keep trying to experiment with food when it always goes wrong 😭

he's so not funny 💀 i love barbie

solomon....baby....😭

asmo and barb mentally checking out is so mf funny to me bc i'd do the same exact thing

if it wasn't already obvious that satan, simeon, and mc's team won, it DEFINITELY is now

big brother lucifer my beloved 🫶🏽🫶🏽

[claraswritings]

CARMY BERZATTO SFW ALPHABET

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

At first he kinda struggles with it because he’s not used to having a girlfriend. He’d be a bit of a lets just link arms or hand hold…. but after a few months he’s coming in and picking you up and kissing you once, twice, sometimes three times until Richie or Tina make some comment and then he’s embarrassed but will still give your hips a squeeze as he walks by you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

I think he would be that friend that you check in with every couple of weeks and see maybe once or twice a year for dinner unless you lived locally but I think he’d be loyal and interested in what you were doing if anything because it would be escapism for him.

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES. Carmy is always wrapping his arms around you and hugging you from behind and I think he’d be like the lean on hugger where you would both end up like semi-leaning on each other. When you’re sitting down I think he’d like to lie on your shoulder and have you play with his hair

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

I think he’s never really thought about it but as soon as he meets you it clicks that he wants you as his partner whatever that looks like. He’s obviously an excellent cook, he’s good at cleaning too as he knows a clean kitchens importance but he can be a litttle disorganised, like the way he has his books on a stack and not on a shelf. You fix that quick.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I am gunna be so fr right now. I love him but he is not the best at expressing his emotions. He would ghost 💀. Or at least he’d like try phase down contact bit by bit until you wouldn’t know what the hell was going on. He’d say he was just busy and do anything to avoid THE TALK until you brought it up.

F = Fiance(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

Like on D- once you’re together he knows he wants you and is committed to you and managing you as an important aspect of your life. I think he’d wait a little bit longer than average before asking you. He wants to lock it in but also is SO nervous because his parents marriage clearly didn’t last and what if you end up divorced like Richie and Tiffany? He wants everything to be perfect. But after a long hard talk with Nat, he knows he’s asking you…that evening.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Carmy would never want to lose it with you ever. He takes extra care not to snap at you or be impatient. Everyone in the Bear would be so surprised when he’s being usual Carmy and then you show up and he’s super sweet, they’re like what the hell when they see him being so gentle and nice with you

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

I think he’d be the kind to hug you from behind even when you’re walking 😭. Like he’d wrap his arms around you and walk with you. Carmy would also be a BIGGG hugger when you’re alone at home. He’d want to lie on your shoulder and be held and have you play with his hair. He’d want you to hug him when you’re in bed too.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

Carmy would have it dawn on him one day that he loves you and he would WANT to tell you immediately but I think he’d hesitate and it would happen one of two ways. You’re getting hot and heavy and he just slips out with it OR he says something and stops and you just know so you help him out by saying it first

“Carm?”

“What?”

“I love you”

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

Omg. Carmy gets so jealous. If a guy looks at you, he’s on the defensive with an arm around you and pulling you in to kiss you. He gets verrry handsy and if the person persists Carmy will absolutely tell them to fuck off

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

We’ve all seen that scene with C. He would take his time kissing you slowly at first, like touching your arms and hands as he does. Apart from on the mouth, I think he’d kiss your hands, and your neckline. He LOVES being kissed in his hair

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

He’s good around kids, better than he thinks. He’s the youngest out of his siblings so barring Eva he’s not been around kids a whole lot. I can imagine if he found out his partner was expecting and they hadn’t been actively trying he’d be a bit of a worrier but as soon as it’s sunk in, he’d be really determined to be as present and there for the kid as possible. Given his own upbringing it would encourage him to work on his issues so it didn’t impact the kid.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

He’s usually an early riser and even if you are too he still manages to be up before you. If you have to be up early too, he’ll make a breakfast for you both. If you don’t he’ll nudge you awake so he can kiss you goodbye

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

👀. Okay aside from the obvious... you’d go out for a food and then cuddle up on his sofa, you’d watch a cooking show and he’d walk you through the RIGHT way to make it. Or you’d go for a drive and take food with you to eat somewhere with a nice view. It would help him de stress I think

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

It would take a while because I think he’d do it gradually . You’d get a comment here or there about Mikey or Donna and you’d, obviously, be like shit, Do you want to talk about it and Carmy would just say ‘no. All good. I’m fine’ in such a way you’d almost believe him if he could meet your eyes. He’d one day just feel comfortable enough to talk fully

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He’s used to a hectic environment and whilst he can sometimes be a little impatient in the kitchen, with you he’s so patient. He’ll take time with you and slow things down to give you breathing space because he does not want to lose it with you.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think Carmy remember the most random shit. Like if you mentioned to him one Tuesday morning that you liked to have everything in, say, blue, he’d remember that forever and make sure to get you anything in the blue version. He’s the type to double check and if you wanted a hot drink he’d recite your order back to you and then be like “and do you like the lemon or chocolate muffin? Usually you get lemon but you mentioned you wanted to try chocolate?” And yet he’d still he get you both.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Probably on your anniversary when he closed the Bear early and set up a table just for the two of you. He’d made a menu just for the two of you and roped in the staff to play their part. Carmy made only ONE trip into the kitchen to check in which he was promptly escorted back to his seat.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He would be SO protective. He doesn’t want anything to happen to you so I can imagine he’d be the “I’ll drive” and the “I’ll walk on the outside” kinda guy. As for how he’d like to be protected, he’d just want you to have his back.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Carmy would go out of his way to make sure it was special. If it’s your anniversary, surprise. He’d be super attentive and want to do all he could to show you he does care. The every day would be walking you to and from work every day. I think he’d do that even if the schedule was hectic

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He can be a massive workaholic, he focuses a lot on the negatives: you’ll try point out to him to focus on the lovely chefs he’s worked with but he’ll be focusing on that one awful chef. It’ll frustrate him and you. I would say smoking but he looks hot doing it soooo 👀

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

We know Carmy obviously works out as I mean… those ARMS. I don’t think he’s a vain guy. I would say he’s self aware he’s a little shorter than average so would go out of his way to make sure he’s jacked to make up for it… I think he’d be concerned more about being neat and tidy for hygiene purposes.

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I think he’s been so used to being without a partner that when he gets you… it just feels like you were the missing part of him. If you were to all of a sudden leave, he’d feel like he’d lost a big part of him and he’d really struggle without your support

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He draws you. Constantly. Like you could be sitting reading or playing a game or just… doing something and Carmy will want to draw you. I LOVEEEE the idea of Carmy drawing

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

Anyone too clingy or who doesn’t understand when he needs to focus in the restaurant would get on his nerves. He’d want someone who doesn’t need to stick to him like glue. I can imagine he’d probably want someone a bit more relaxed than him too as otherwise the tension might get too much

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habits of theirs?)

Carmy is used to crashing out on his couch a lot of the time so he only has one pillow on his bed. It’s clean but it is still just one pillow. You, of course, go straight out to the nearest place to get a whole set which he then doesn’t know how he ever lived without.

[jungkooksrealgirlfriend]

Eggs Breakfast 🍳🫦

🥚pairing: jungkook x fem reader

🥚word count: 3.5k

🥚genre: really filthy smut 😭

🥚summary: while cooking breakfast for jungkook one morning, his mind cracks an idea. what if he were the one making the scrambled eggs today?

🥚warnings: dom!jungkook, sub!reader, unprotected sex, anal sex, food play, fingering, explicit language, oral sex, dirty talk, creampie, crack (🤣🍳) fic, idfk what else but this shit is dirty  

🥚disclaimer (with the notion that only a small group of my friends will read this): i am not a writer by any means and i just wrote this for fun because my friend requested a fic based on an inside joke our friend group has and i wanted to take a crack (pun intended) at it. for that reason, i apologize if certain things don’t make sense. it’s also got other random inside jokes sprinkled in so if something seems weirdly mentioned, random, or goofy then that’s probably why. also, i did write this the best i could but it’s also a joke fic so don’t take it seriously. and no, i don’t have a kink of jungkook fucking eggs into my booty hole 😭💀 but if any of u do i don’t kink shame and i hope u enjoy fr 🤝 and to my friends DON’T FUCKING ROAST ME LMFAOAOAOO i wrote this out of the kindness in my heart for a friend who was in (really) desperate need. also!! i am a tumblr noob and don’t know much about formatting, but i’ve found this is easier to read when it’s not on my xxx.tumblr.com page but instead on the normal tumblr.com/xxx page (at the time of posting this in dec 2022) because the spacing doesn’t carry over for some reason? bro idk if it’s the theme i chose or it’s something fixable on tumblr but like i said i’m not a writer nor tumblr savvy 💀 so bear with me

Jungkook leans on the kitchen counter, arms crossed over his chest as he watches you standing across from him, back turned his way. He hated the way his cock stirred in his sweats at the sight of you cooking breakfast in those sleeping shorts you liked to wear. If it wasn’t your exposed legs that got him going, it was definitely the way half your ass was peeking out from under the cloth.

Yet you simply continued your activities, being none the wiser to the man standing behind you. You reached for the carton of fresh eggs sitting on the counter, grabbing one before cracking it into the pan. You didn't need to ask Jungkook how he liked his eggs in the morning, because after being in a three year long relationship, you knew all too well that he preferred them over easy, just as he knew you preferred yours scrambled and with ketchup.

He also knew that you preferred iced coffee over hot coffee, and that you liked warmer weather over colder weather. But one of his favorite things he knew about you was how you were ever so willing to try new things, whether that be hesitantly tasting a new food at his favorite restaurant or agreeing to try something crazy in the bedroom.

You two were no strangers to spicing it up during naughty time, and you both have always been open and communicated about the things you’ve wanted to try. That thought alone caused Jungkook’s mind to wander, truly wondering if you really were willing to try anything at all. Because the sight of you in those shorts, cracking eggs into a pan set his imagination on fire.

He gingerly pushes himself off the counter and walks towards you, arms swaying briefly at his sides before he pushes himself against your back and snakes his hands around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. You giggle, flipping the egg in the pan. 

“Getting impatient? It’s almost done, baby.”

“I think I’m hungry for something else now,” he rasps out, morning voice still present as he pushes his clothed dick against your ass. “Don’t know how you expect me to behave when you're leaving little to the imagination.”

At that you smirk, and Jungkook thinks maybe you did it on purpose to get a rise out of him. His suspicion turns out to be true when you turn off the stove, slide his egg onto a plate, and turn around with a look in your eyes that he knows all too well. 

“But baby,” you say, feigning innocence as you travel your hand up his exposed chest, “don’t you want to eat your breakfast? It’s over easy, just how you like it. And eggs are good for stamina.” you tease.

“You’re a little motherfucking stinker,” he snickers. “I want you to know that.”

“Hmmm, am I?” you muse, “You’re the one talking nonsense at 9 in the morning. Maybe you’re the motherfucking stinker.”

There is no serious weight to either of your words at the obvious joke, yet he still clenches his jaw and moves his face only inches from yours, eyes meeting eyes. 

He lets out a small breath, “You’re going to regret saying that. You have no idea what I wanna do to you right now.”

You can’t help but laugh, not missing the lustful glint in his eyes. You love the back and forth that often happens between you two. It causes your stomach to bubble with anticipation because it doesn’t take long for him to get you wet and in the mood. 

“I never regret anything.”

“Oh baby,” he rests his forehead against yours, “you will this time.”

Suddenly you’re pulled from your spot of being pinned against the stove and are shoved front-forward against the breakfast bar, hands sprawled out on the granite countertop. You can’t help but smile like an idiot because pushing his buttons is your favorite thing to do, and what tends to follow soon after leaves you breathless.

You feel him slide his hands up and down your sides, this action alone sending shivers through your spine. But when he begins to push you down onto the counter with his naked chest against your back, hands following down your arms and intertwining with your own, you find yourself holding your breath before your cheek meets the cold surface with hands on either side of your head.

He’s almost laying on top of you, squishing your body between his own and the breakfast bar. You can only imagine how erotic the scene must look and you wish you had a mirror nearby so you could look into it and see how his body fit against yours like a puzzle piece. You feel his now fully hard dick poking your ass, his chest against your back, and his hands on top of yours. You feel him everywhere, yet not in the places you’re craving him the most right now. 

He leans down to your ear and nibbles on it. “I’m not going to be nice this time. I know you did all this to intentionally provoke me. Is this fun for you?” he chuckles, “Pushing my buttons to get me riled up?”

His voice comes out raspier than you expect and it sends a shiver throughout your whole body causing you to rub your thighs together. He cocks his head to the side a bit, eyes meeting yours and you know he’s waiting for an answer, so you nod your head and smirk up at him. 

“Yeah, it’s pretty fucking hot.”

This causes him to smirk back at you as he licks his bottom lip. You slightly lift your head and allow your eyes to follow the movement before looking back up into his own in an unspoken request. He understands what you want and grants your wish by connecting your lips together.

This kiss is rough and needy, but his lips feel so good against yours that you moan in satisfaction. Bodies on fire, tongues dancing together, and with the need to feel more you push your ass harder against his length in an attempt to gain some friction earning a grunt from the man who, of course, isn’t wearing any underwear. 

Jungkook, knowing you better than you know yourself, grants you your silent plea as he begins to grind your covered heat with his knee. He grinds, and grinds. You feel your adrenaline pick up and you can’t take it anymore. 

“Jungkook,” you gasp out, “need to feel you.”

He chuckles before pulling away, pushing himself off your back and leaving you flat against the counter. His breathing is heavy as he lifts his tattooed arm to brush his hair back, his other arm grabbing firm hold of your waist. Your eyes drop to his abs as they flex at the action, and you swear you could hear purring at this point because of how much your pussy gushed with anticipation. 

He shakes his head, “Look at you, begging for my cock. Is this what you wanted all along? For me to bend you over the counter and fuck you so well like you know I can?”

His voice was low and sultry and fuck, he sounded so hot it made you automatically clench around nothing. He always knew what to say to make your knees weak. 

“Yes” you say, voice coming out whinier than you expected. “Need you so bad right now, baby.”

He knew you went crazy over his dirty words, and you knew he went crazy when you begged for him. 

“Then spread your legs for me, love.”

He tucks his fingers under your waistband slowly tugging them down your legs along with your panties that were now soaked with your arousal. You felt the cold air hit your core and you let out a shaky breath, stepping out of the two articles of clothing once they were by your ankles. 

Without waiting for instruction, you momentarily lift yourself off of the counter to pull your shirt over your head, being left completely nude and vulnerable to Jungkook’s eyes. However, you didn’t feel embarrassed or insecure. You felt the opposite actually, since Jungkook always made you feel like the most beautiful girl in the world who had the sexiest body, and he often showed you how much he loved it.

Laying back down on the counter, Jungkook places his hands back on your now naked waist, kicking your legs open with his own, wide enough for him to stand in between. He slides his long fingers through your slick folds causing you to quickly shut your eyes and moan at the contact. The combination of his fingers and the cold counter underneath your bare chest makes you shiver and you spread your legs even wider.

Jungkook snickers and retrieves his fingers, earning a protesting whine from you. Sneaking a glance back, you see him pulling his gray sweats down his hips, letting them fall to his ankles before he steps out of them and kicks them somewhere to the side along with your clothes too. 

Seeing his bare dick practically makes your mouth water and you wish you could drop to your knees and pleasure him, however his hold on you is tight and you know whatever he has planned will please both of you. 

Momentarily locking eyes with him, you both smirk at each other before you lay your cheek back on the surface, eagerly awaiting him to part your folds. However, the intrusion doesn’t come and you instead feel him lean to reach for something. Once again, you lift your head to look over your shoulder, seeing him grab an egg from the open carton you left by the stove.

“Jungkook… what are you doing?” you question.

He returns to his previous position, egg in hand and knowing smirk on his face. Your eyes move between the egg and his eyes, until he leans down, nose almost touching yours. You can feel his warm breath on your face and the close proximity makes you clench again. He’s staring deep into your eyes and you feel like he’s staring straight into your soul.

“I’m going to crack this egg into your ass and fuck you so hard that I scramble it. Then, I’m gonna enjoy my breakfast.”

You tense at his words. He wants to what? The idea sounds crazy but you’d be lying if you said you weren’t considering it, imagining him fucking you, using the slippery egg as your lube until you’re screaming his name. However, you’re hesitant because this is new territory for the both of you.

“You’re joking right? You can’t be serious about that. About fucking it in my ass. About… scrambling it.” you question.

Was he joking? Jungkook didn’t know. He was sure that the heat radiating off your bodies was enough to fry an egg, so why not scramble it?

“You should know more than anyone when I am and am not fucking around.” he rasps out.

You gulp, getting more turned on by his words. Were you really about to let him crack an egg in your booty hole? In other circumstances you’d probably laugh in his face and tell him he’s being ridiculous, but in this moment the raw sex appeal he’s radiating has you considering it. Really considering it.

Staring back into his eyes you slowly nod your head, your lips slightly turning upwards. 

“Okay big boy. Show me exactly what you mean. Show me how well you can fuck me with that egg.”

At this he backs away and stands tall, smirking to himself before he takes a deep breath. 

“Spread yourself for me.” he commands.

You lay your cheek on the counter and reach behind you, grabbing your ass and spreading it open.

Jungkook knew in order for the egg to make it into your hole he was going to have to stretch you out, so he took his his index and middle fingers and began rubbing them through your folds to gather some of your arousal. 

The touch came as a shock to you and you jerked forward, mewling at the feeling. His fingers felt so good and you thought if he kept on you would’ve came before he even entered you. 

He continues to gather your slick and moves it to your ass, rubbing it over your puckered hole to allow for easier penetration. 

He begins to push one finger in, a deep moan ripping out of your throat. He used his other hand to caress the small of your back as he kept slowly pushing in until he was a knuckle deep. He then slowly pulled out, repeating the process until he was pumping you. The pace wasn’t anything drastic, and the feel of his single finger was definitely not enough for you to reach your high, but that didn’t stop the quiet whimpers that escaped your lips.

After deciding you needed more, you pushed your ass back and he took that as a sign to add a second finger, fingering you faster and deeper than before. 

With each pump, you moaned out at the feeling, cursing under your breath when he adds a third finger. Jungkook wanted to make sure you were stretched enough, so he took his time, gradually quickening his pace. 

All that could be heard in the tiny kitchen was your whimpers and the soft wet sounds of your arousal coating his fingers. 

Suddenly his fingers were gone from your hole and you felt like crying, missing his touch already. A moment passes before you hear the sound of him cracking the egg onto the counter with enough force for the shell to break but not enough for anything to leak out. 

Your body felt like it was on fire, your hair sticking to your forehead and you were sure Jungkook’s was doing the same. You could hardly think at this moment, barely registering the words that came from his mouth.

“You ready?” he asks, licking his lips.

You immediately nodded, eager to feel anything. 

But you knew Jungkook needed to hear you voice it, so you whispered out a small “Please.”

“So needy.” he mumbles as he slightly lowers down and uses both hands to begin opening the egg, watching as the clear mucus begins to seep into your hole as you still hold your ass open.

The feeling was strange, but not unwelcome. The egg was cold, but not cold enough to feel uncomfortable. Instead, the feeling made you tense and shiver with anticipation, and the thought of Jungkook fucking it into you was the only thing on your mind right now.

He opened it wider, watching as the remainder of egg was sucked into your hole. “I’m glad this went over easy.” he amusingly remarks. 

“Fuck you,” you curse, irritation hinting because of how impatient you were. Was he really making puns right now?

“You’re about to,” he smirks, pushing two fingers into your hole to spread the egg. It’s slick and if even possible, it turns him on more, especially from the way you jerk forward and loudly moan. 

However, he’s brief and removes his egg-slicked fingers to take his dick into his hand, groaning at the feeling of giving himself a few pumps, coating it with a thin layer of egg white. He grabs your waist before he situates himself at your back entrance, pausing for a second before he begins to push himself in.

He was easily able to bottom out, the slimy texture of the egg being the clear reason for that. He barely gives you any time to adjust before he pulls out and slams his hips forward all over again.

You moan uncontrollably, mouth agape in pleasure and eyes tightly shut. He was pumping in and out of you with ease, further coating his dick with your arousal and the egg that was now surely beginning to froth inside your body the quicker his pace became. 

The slick sounds and the way his balls slapped against your pussy made your head spin, and Jungkook was surely enjoying this just as much as you were from the way his head was tilted back and he was groaning, hands holding your hips so tight that you were sure there would be bruises later.

“Fuck!” you screamed out, tears beginning to prick your eyes as your moans began to mix with sobs at how fucking good it felt. The temperature of the egg in your body was now matching your own, a contrast to the cold plated eggs you had cooked earlier that were long forgotten on the counter.

“Jungkook,” you stuttered out, “so…so good” you sobbed. 

Hearing you sound so vulnerable, saying his name while he was balls deep inside of you made his cock twitch and a moan escape his lips. He loved you so much and would do anything for you. He would get on his hands and knees and wash your feet as Jesus did for Judas, simply doing it out of his love and obsession for you.

You felt your stomach begin to tighten, a sign that you were close to your high. Jungkook was close too, but he wanted you to cum first so he let go of your hip with one of his hands and began to circle your sensitive bud as you shuddered underneath him. He then moved his fingers from your clit to your entrance, pushing in and pumping his fingers fast.

“I am go-go-go-gonna cum.” you stutter, seemingly not able to even say that simple sentence as you screw your eyes shut tighter.

The combination of his dick pumping in your ass and his fingers in your cunt brings a whole new wave of pleasure. You feel so full of him and without warning, you tense and feel the knot snap in your stomach as you cum on his fingers and uncontrollably clench around them. Your ass convulses as you’re clenching hard around his dick, seeming to involuntarily suck it in deeper with ease pulse. 

Your entire body tingles as you let out a guttoral moan and say his name over and over like a chant. Tears are rolling down your cheeks as you begin to feel the start of overstimulation.

Jungkook pauses for a moment, removing his fingers from your cunt before he shoves them into your mouth and uses his other hand to hold you down by your neck, the pressure making your eyes roll back into your head as you suck his fingers and taste yourself, moaning as you do.

He then starts pumping at an even more animalistic pace than before, trying to reach his own high as you start whimpering from the overstimulation. 

“I know baby, I know.” he soothes, keeping the same pace before his hips begin stuttering and he cums inside your ass, a loud moan ripping from his throat as well.

He doesn’t move, you both breathing heavily as he curses and lays his head on your back, intertwining his hands with your own. You feel content at having just been properly fucked and could really go for a shower right now.

However, he’s not done as he gives you a final pump, further mixing his semen with the raw egg before he removes his softening cock, crouches down, and lifts you up higher by your thighs. 

You’re too fucked out to immediately react, but you widen your eyes when you realize what he’s about to do.

He licks a stripe through your pussy, tasting your arousal on his tongue. “You taste so fucking good.” he moans.

“What are you doing?” you question, using the little strength you have left to look behind you, meeting his eyes. 

He can see the look in your eyes, see you’re surprised because you know what he’s about to do. So he smirks. That fucker smirks. 

“I’m about to enjoy my breakfast.”

He takes his two fingers and gathers up the cum and egg dripping out of your hole, shoving it back in and pumping a few times before removing his fingers and replacing them with his tongue. 

You gasp out, not believing he was actually eating your ass hole right after fucking an egg into you.

“Mmmm,” he hums into your backside. 

Uncontrollable moans leave your mouth as he licks you clean, standing up shortly after and lightly slapping your ass.

You stand up, legs wobbly, and you have to grib the edge of the breakfast bar to stop your knees from giving out. 

Jungkook felt good seeing you like this, knowing he was the cause and reason. It boosted his ego and he felt like the luckiest guy in the world.

“You’re nasty as shit,” you spit, turning around to face him while your hands still gripped the counter. However, you had a smirk on your lips showing Jungkook that you didn’t really mean it.

He chuckles, giving you a raise of his eyebrow.

“Well you didn’t seem to think so when you were begging for me to touch you.”

You roll your eyes, “You know that I love the way you fuck me.”

He walks up to you, hands sliding over your arms leaving goosebumps on your skin. He looks down at you and you look up, staring into each other’s eyes.

“I wouldn’t mind having my breakfast like that again in the future,” he smirks, “because I think scrambled eggs just became my new favorite.”

[issacballsac]

“Being Apart of The Sk8 Crew„

Just rewatched Sk8 the infinity and now I wish I had friends so ! Gn reader

Joe | “I wanna marry your abs!”

Y’all would meet your first time at S

Obviously you’d be amazed by his skating and even if u don’t like men he’s hot as hell bro don’t lie

One of two things happens

You A. Run up to him and ask abt his skating techniques and such

Or B. He actually walks up to you to talk about your skating(only if ur good ofc💀)

He’s such a dad

If you’re younger than him he’s constantly trying to sound smart/give you wisdom

Sometimes it’s solid advice the other times it’s pure nonsense

If you like to cook/want to learn he’ll happily teach you

If not he’ll settle for a new taste tester

He would def make jokes all the time

Some genuinely funny

He expects you to laugh at all of them even if it wasn’t funny

He’d appreciate it if you didn’t cock block him like everyone else

Despite being quick to take off his shirt he’s very fashionable and takes pride in his looks obviously

If you ever needed fashion advice best go to him!

He’s a pretty laid back guy so you wouldn’t get into arguments often

Would love to skate everywhere but he’s like…got a job and responsibilities so..

Still a great dad friend to have

Honestly would care and worry over you if you got into some dumb shit so don’t do anything stupid and he won’t worry

Joe for the win🗣️‼️

Cherry/Kaoru | A.I. Advancement

You’d meet when he paid a visit to Joe’s restaurant

Ofc you knew of him bc he’s popular but you never MET Kaoru

You def walked in on their date arguing

It was so awkward u were jus like:🧍‍♂️

“Is this a bad time time to visit you?”

“Hey! Kaoru this is [ ], the kid I was talking about.”

“What a peculiar child to willingly hang around you.”

“Whatever you say, Pinky.”

He’s kinda weird with his whole AI stuff but other than that a great friend

Makes snarky comments with you

Unless ur too nice to make snide remarks

Constantly complains abt the angle of your turns

Unironically would show up at your parent teacher conferences(if you’re still in the lower schooling ofc)

Would never admit it but he loves each of his friends and would be genuinely concerned if anything happened

Shadow | Petty Clown

Oh when y’all met you wanted to throw hands

I imagine something similar to his introduction with Reki

Bro straight up threw an explosive in your face???(smoke bomb maybe but still)

He may be petty but you’re pettier(is that even a word?💀)

You found out he worked at a flower shop bc lets be FR he doesn’t look much different outside of S

Lil arguments here lil threats there and you leave with a nice assortment of flowers

Bro side eyes you EVERYTIME y’all cross paths at S😭

After the whole gang is assembled y’all no longer act this way towards one another

Bros the only responsible adult of this group

He def did your makeup once and you broke out the next day💀

“Are you sure you know what you’re doin’?”

“Trust me, kid.”

“I don’t know why but I don’t.”

You try and help him with his relationship endeavors but it never works out😭

He’ll go to the gym with you if you don’t wanna go alone

Gym bros‼️🗣️

Miya | Catty Child

This fucker

Y’all are quite the duo

Annoying ass mfs whenever and wherever you go

If you have any sort of pet it’s his pet now

Bros the animal whisperer

He’d have to be interested in your skating for y’all to become friends

So pretend ur decent or even amazing; however big ur delusion allows itself to be🫡

He’s smart but would invite you somewhere under the premise of studying just to goof around

If he needs a second player for his game bro is gonna drag your ass so y’all can play

Goes shopping with you just to complain about how everything is ugly in the stores

“That’s not cute, who thought selling this was a good idea?”

“Bitch—if you’re going to be negative the whole time go home‼️”

Reki | Redheaded Menace

If you thought you + Miya was a devious duo just imagine you and Reki

Y’all would prob meet second after you and Joe met

Bc he works at a skate shop

And you need skating stuff(you can tell I’m not a skater💀)

If you’re just a good skater and don’t know actual science and shit behind it he’s constantly telling you about it like you care

You guys cruise around together for fun

He made your current board and you’ll never get another one that’s not from him

You teach him any and all tricks/skills you know

Probably took you to his house to give you your current board bc he was working on it in his house and you met all of his family

His mom is just happy he’s got some friends

You become besties with his mom

She gossips abt news and celebrities with you

Claims ur like her other child(forget the rest of them👺)

Makes you lunch bc she’s nice like that

You let him ramble abt stuff he’s interested in even if you aren’t listening fully

Would silently beg you to stay back with him during the hot spring scavenge bc he’s scared

Forces you to watch horror movies with him bc he gets scared and needs someone else with him

Bro would be elated the whole day if you called him cool

Snow/Langa | Canadian Curiosity

Omg he’s Canadian?😦 Seize him!

Obviously being involved with S you would’ve heard of Snow but Reki would’ve introduced y’all before the big news

Bro would shove him in your face as if he’s a shiny trophy(at the beginning ofc)

“This is Langa! New guy from my class apparently he’s interested in skating.”

“Sick—he’s so pale.”

“He’s from Canada.”

“Oh.”

Bro is so oblivious it’s crazy

You gotta like SPELL IT OUT for him if you’re ever alluding to smth

Langa stays hungry and would go out to eat with you anytime

You and Reki would def help him decorate his room bc it’s…bland

It’s not bad but there’s no personality

He tells you abt his favourite dishes back in Canada and y’all try and locate any places in Japan that might sell smth similar

If not you guys attempt to make it yourselves at his house

His mom walks in on y’all ruining the kitchen💀

“Langa I’m…home.”

“Hey, Mom.”

“Hey Langa’s Mom!”

Bro is a skating addict and will skate whenever and wherever

Wants to race you like at least twice every week

Loser pays for dinner

You help him with his reading and writing and if you didn’t already know he’d teach you English

[lunavrse]

PURELY PLATONIC(?)

CHARLES LECLERC

summary : are yn and charles dating? are they just friends? who cares? well, twitter does. category : smau. note : disregard all times and dates, they don't matter. all spelling mistakes are intentional. this wasn't supposed to be my 1st fic posted but it is what it is.

INSTAGRAM

like by pierregasly, youruser, landonorris and 658 422 others.

charles_leclerc finally got to see ma crevette

View all 2 172 comments

youruser thought we'd agreed that you'd never call that in public ever again

charles_leclerc no, you said that, i was silent

user2 were you silent or were you silenced😭

youruser you're such a pain in my arse

charles_leclerc you love me really

youruser unfortunately

username67 SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP SOBBING

user08 they're so friends to lovers coded

username12 SHE DIDN'T DISAGREE!!!

pierregasly didn't you see her 2 months ago? when you flew out to see her

charles_leclerc that was forever ago

pierregasly *cough*whipped*cough*

this comment was deleted by creator

user8 I SAW THAT, YOU CANT HIDE FROM ME

user92 HE FLEW OUT TO SEE HER😭😭

user5 did anyone see pierres deleted comment or was it just me?

user16 no, I saw it too

user7 me too!

landonorris relax bro, no one's taking her away from you

charles_leclerc I'd like to see someone try lol

user99 adding lol to the end of your sentence didn't make it less threatening 💀

user420 *joker voice* why so serious??

user111 LANDO, WHAT DO YOU MEAN BY THIS??? ANSWER ME PLS, I AM IN YOUR WALLS

lunavrse pls pretend the manips look good👍 also the last one is just a random picture bc I couldn't edit it the way I wanted

user25 what the fuck are you on about?

user72 what is bro yapping about?❗💀

user7 WHO LET BLUD COOK⁉️❓❗❗

user222 monaco's finest😋

user00 them in the 1st pic have my heart

user000 UGH,, HIS DIMPLES!!!!

mutualfriend she's serving and then there's you

user777 two pretty best friends🤭

user66 two besties😁

user33 yeah... besties...

user92 REUNITED AND IT FEELS SO GOOD...

user29 REUNITED CAUSE WE UNDERSTOOD

user929 i love this song

user127 I KNOW Y'ALL SEE THE "MY" INFRONT OF THE PETNAME

user24 WE LOVE TO SEE IT

user9 that's honestly so fucking cute I'm crying

user88 charles repping ferrari where ever he goes!!!

user237 suprised it's only the one tbh

user228 as he should!!!

user1616 THE WAY HES LOOKING AT HER😭😭😭

user090 face cards never declining ❗

user10 charlito te amo❤️ !!!

user47 never knew i needed this until now

user74 so real bro

user27 please back away from my wife, it's hard enough seeing her with another man and you have the audacity to rub it in my face😭

user123 two best friends in a room... they might kiss

user262 can we talk about how close they are??? like they just seem so touchy!!!

user751 no fr!!! you can't tell me they're not in love with one another

user12 see if he was touching me like this, you'd never see me again because I'd be deceased

user61 so real of you tbh

user767 pls they're so...

user50 im not allowed to see these, im unwell

user44 you look so cute !

TWITTER

MESSAGES

TWITTER

INSTAGRAM

landonorris has posted to their instagram story.

you replied to their story.

YOU DUMB BITCH DELETE THIS ⤷landonorris SORRY, IT WAS MEANT FOR MY CLOSE FRIENDS

you replied to their story.

DELETE THIS YOU CLOWN ⤷landonorris DONT YELL AT ME! I'LL DO IT NOW

you replied to their story.

is that charles and yn

lunavrse replied to their story.

this is the worst manip in this post<3 (editing note: it's actually not, it gets worse)

you replied to their story.

LANDO IS THAT CHARLES AND YN

you replied to their story.

Lando mate, they're gonna kill you

you replied to their story.

I KNEW IT, MY FAMILY SAID I WAS CRAZY AND THEY CAN KISS MY ASS

you replied to their story.

Carlos owes me €100, I knew it'd be you. can't wait to attend your funeral

this story has been deleted

TWITTER

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youruser suprise but not really🎉

View all 7 252 comments

landonorris does this mean I get to live?

youruser you're funny.

landonorris what do you mean?!? please don't kill me

youruser see you soon x

charles_leclerc we look so good❤️

youruser the best baby❤️

user19 BABY SHHSHSHE

user91 IM SCREAMING, CANT BELIEVE I GET TO SEE THIS

pierregasly glad i don't have to suffer alone and the rest of the world gets to see how gross you guys are

charles_leclerc weren't you the one who sent me a voice note crying about how happy you were when i told you i finally asked her out ?

youruser aww, pierre, you cried???

pierregasly he's lying

charles_leclerc do you want me to send her the voice note?

user65 it's quiet, ain't no back talk🤭

user80 charles said, i've got receipts bitch💀💀

user71 THEY LOOK GOOD TOGETHER!!!

user22 idk who i want more

user505 me and who?

user005 me n u?

user505 lol no

user101 IMS O USED TO GIVING ANDN OW I GET TO RECEIVE 🥹

user41 PARENTS

user14 IKTR😌

user06 IM SO GLAD WE GOT (OFFICIAL) CONFIRMATION

user003 god, me when?

user79 i want both of 'em😋

user25 I need to know when this happened 😭

user87 same😭