#Then I WAS HUMBLED PFFFT

[sadboytristan]

Man, everytime someone likes that post, the one where my SMUG ASS WROTE,

"RALPH WRECKING CONFIDENCE"

I was so proud, nah—

Cause I was PLEASED AS PUNCH, to be INCOHERENT🗣

and man, that shit has mE WHEEZING❗️

Cause nah, is that? Man was that how smug Felix felt?? When his dUM--

When he called Ralph, ✨️BIG NOSE✨️

Every time yall like that post, where I straight up R O A S T E D the sHIT OUTTA HIM, only to find out I AM HIM,,, yall I swear to god,,,

that KEEPS ME– it, HUMBLES ME🤡

[otomiyaa]

Lucifer, Solomon, Barbatos x Reader

Romantic + 06. “Could you… do that to me?” + 13. “That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position.” Requested by @hakurei-k for my 1K Followers Event🌻

Word Count: 1.7K (I normally don't count words for drabbles but I felt this got a bit longer than average and boi I was right)

Barbatos was winning. You could see the confident look in his eyes, even though his act was still kind and humble as ever.

"Are you discouraged? No need. Don't worry, you still have a chance to win this."

It was just a one-on-one lucky dice game. No skill needed, no experience. Only luck, making it a fair game for anyone: demons, angels and yourself, a human.

You played it sometimes with Barbatos, and also with Lucifer and Solomon. The four of you were on a summer trip to the human world where you liked to show them some of the places where you would hang out in the past.

However the weather was so awfully hot that it was hard to move outside, or enjoy the nice places you wanted to show them, so you didn't mind to spend some more time in your hotel room instead, which included the lucky dice game a lot.

And to keep it more interesting after multiple wins and losses, Barbatos came up with this little rule for the two of you:

"The loser will get tickled by Lucifer."

"Do I get a say in this?" was Lucifer's dry remark. He was not playing the game with you, but he sat in a corner of the spacious hotel suite, reading a book.

In the end Lucifer didn't refuse and wasn't against the little penalty, if that would make your game with Barbatos even more exciting.

But the more lucky rolls the smug demon butler had, the more nervous you got. He was winning, and the thought of Lucifer tickling you right now... You blushed. It would be killing! Barbatos getting tickled however? Thanks to his own suggestion? Now that was the entertainment you were looking for.

You glanced at Solomon who was relaxing on his bed, with an electric fan right by his side to keep him cool, even though the air conditioning in the room was more than okay.

There was a way to still win this game, and even though it was a sneaky and nasty one, you felt like it was worth the try.

"My turn?" you asked, and you grabbed the dice. Then with your elbow you not-so-accidentally bumped your glass full of cold soda all over yourself. A sweet and refreshing sacrifice you were willing to make.

"Oh no," Barbatos said dryly, but you already jumped up.

"Eeeek, how clumsy of me! Don't worry! I'll get it off! Solomon, come help me!" Before Solomon could even protest, you ran towards him, yanked him off his bed by grabbing his arm, and dragged him into the bathroom with you. Just in case, you closed the door.

"That happens," you heard Lucifer say. Pffft. Spilling a drink, of course it can happen to anyone. Except you, if it wasn't with a reason.

"I'll help you, calm down," Solomon said when you pinned him against the wall. But you stared at him intensely.

"Solomon," you mumbled, keeping your voice down so the others wouldn't hear.

"Please.. Could you… do that to me?" you asked. Now that the moment was here, you were shy to state the literal words.

"...What?" Solomon seemed confused by how intense you were, so you were forced to explain it.

"Make me uh, luckier?"

"I'm already making you lucky, aren't I?" Oh the sass. Stupid Solomon.

"Solomon!" you whined. "S-P-E-L-L. The lucky spell! Please, I need it."

"Oh, that. Hm... Last time you said it didn't work though?" Solomon frowned.

"Forget what I said, it could work now. Put the spell on me, I need to win this. You want Barbatos to get tickled too, right? Especially by Lucifer. It's free entertainment for us if I win this game, not to mention it's Barbatos' very own idea. I have to win."

"So, you'll cheat?" You weren't proud to see Solomon so smug about it.

"W-whatever! And like you said, it may not work. I know you're still working on that spell. But we can try at least, right?"

Solomon's lucky spell was something he had tried on you a few times, without Lucifer and Barbatos knowing since you knew they wouldn't approve of magical experiments on you, even though this was quite an innocent one.

"Hmm, we can try indeed," Solomon agreed.

"Try what?"

Oh no. You looked back to see the door open again. Barbatos was standing there, and even Lucifer had gotten up to check on you.

"Is the soda off yet?" he said, but you could hear he was sarcastic. You blushed and looked at Solomon, then at them again.

"N-nothing! I mean, try uh, try to clean my clothes? The soda is still here," you said, rubbing at the sticky spot on your shirt.

"Try what, Solomon?" Barbatos asked Solomon, ignoring your silly excuse.

"Try my lucky spell, to win the game," Solomon said. WHAT! You looked at him in shock. Betrayal! He merely smiled at you.

"You know I can't lie, not when Lucifer is here too."

Coward! You looked at Lucifer and Barbatos and tried to explain.

"No! He means, not a spell b-but like the eh magic word of motivation and- eek!" You stood with your back against Solomon when Barbatos and Lucifer walked into the bathroom. Although quite spacious and luxurious, this room was suddenly very... cramped, and crowded.

"Were you trying to win, by cheating?" Barbatos asked calmly.

"No! Really I wasn't!"

"Lucky spell? Has Solomon been practicing magic on you, in secret?" Lucifer asked.

"No! Not in secret- I mean, not at all! Solomon, tell them it's not true!"

To your surprise, Solomon who still stood behind you, grabbed both your shoulders and held you tightly against him, pulling you back slightly. He said with his mouth very close to your ear:

"Still trying to lie your way out of this? That’s… quite an attitude for someone in your position."

Three against one, nooo!

"I really wah-Ahahaha! Lucifeheher no plehehease!" you cried when Lucifer and Barbatos finally closed you in, and Lucifer was the first to start tickling you.

"Since cheating counts as losing, this punishment is for you," he said, sounding very vengeful while attacking your tummy. He must be so disappointed in you for experimenting with magic behind his back.

"Nonono I dihihidn't cheheheat- ahahah!"

"You attempted to, so Lucifer is right," Barbatos said. He only needed one hand to grab both of yours, and you yelped when he used his free hand to start tickling your side and ribs.

"No this ihihisn't fahahair! Aahahah!" you howled. "Solomohohon hehehelp!"

You squirmed against him, but instead of helping you, Solomon joined in by sneaking his fingers under your arms where he started to tickle your armpits mercilessly.

"Cheating indeed isn't fair, so I agree with this punishment." That Solomon! You could swear he wouldn't have minded putting that spell on you if you weren't caught, but here he was, conveniently choosing Barbatos and Lucifer's side.

"Plehehease- hehehe nohohot thehehehere!"

"Not where?" Barbatos asked. Fair. They were all tickling a different spot, and you weren't even sure who this was aimed at. It all tickled so bad.

"E-everywhehehere hahaha!"

"I am confused," Solomon joked, and you jolted when he dug his fingers into the centers of your armpits. The sneaky sorcerer was tickling you and holding you steady at the same time, making sure you wouldn't sink through your knees and slip out of their grasp.

Not that you saw any chance to escape. It was a tickle punishment you were going to endure for as long as they pleased.

"This shirt is all dirty," Lucifer said, picking up your sticky soda shirt and pulling it up slightly. When he tickled your bare tummy, with his fingers scribbling around your belly button, you threw your head back and shrieked.

"Noooohohoo ahahaha!" Normally Lucifer would wear gloves, and whenever he tickled you while wearing them, well yes, it tickled indeed. But since it was so hot and you were relaxing in the hotel anyway, he wasn't wearing them, and you could swear that with his bare hands, his tickles felt twice as ticklish.

Meanwhile Barbatos clawed at your ribs with terrifying determination, while keeping a serious face. And none of them seemed to mind that your hysterical laughter was extra loud with a special echo effect, since you were still in the bathroom!

"Need some help there?" Solomon said, moving your shirt up even further so Barbatos' fingers started to get access to your bare ribs.

"We're fine, but thank you," Barbatos said politely.

"Plehehease I'm sohohorry!" you yelled through hysterical giggles.

"Why apologize?" Solomon asked. He was so mean!

"I'm sohohorry I t-tried to cheheheat!"

"So you admit it, good. What else?" Lucifer said, glaring at you while not even slowing down his tickle attack on you.

"I'm sohohorry for lehehetting S-Solo-ahahaha whahaait!" It was hard to apologize properly while getting tickled like this.

"Keep talking," Barbatos said. They were not making it easy!

"I'm s-sorry fohohor hehehe, ehexperimenting mahahagic!" Better, shorter. And they seemed to accept it. It was a weird experience to feel the tickling stop so suddenly as they all stopped at the same time, yet it was as if your laughter was still echoing through the bathroom.

"Apology accepted," Lucifer said.

Barbatos finally smiled again and pinched your cheek fondly. "Me too," he said.

Solomon finally released you as well and you stumbled forward, right into Barbatos' arms. You enjoyed the feeling of his comforting embrace while he caressed your hair.

"We were a little hard on you, I apologize too," he admitted, giving you the aftercare you really deserved after going through that intense tickle punishment. You giggled and leaned against him. Lucifer also caressed your back, helping you relax. He then turned to Solomon.

"So, next up is Solomon," he announced. Solomon jumped.

"Eh? I didn't lose any game," he argued.

"You didn't. But you also secretly experimented with magic, on our human," Lucifer said, making you blush like you always did whenever they would call you theirs.

"It was just a harmless trick!" Solomon chirped, but even though you were too tired and Barbatos didn't join in either, it was still a delight to see Lucifer release that lovely tickle wrath on the ticklish sorcerer. You knew Lucifer alone could be just as bad as the three of them together, and it became clear as soon as Solomon's desperate pleas were heard.

"Pleehhease ahaha hehehelp mehehe!" he whined, but you merely smirked and watched him get what he deserved.

"Get him, Lucifer," you encouraged, and you happily indulged yourself in Solomon's sweet melodious laughter.

[naffeclipse]

I come from the depths of chapter 15 with a humble comment to offer! \o/

Goooooosh, so many things are happening and I've just been staring at the ask window wondering how to even start kfjdhgkjh

Ok, ok, so the start! Oooh the start of the chapter was all the tension I was expecting and then some! There of course wouldn't have been time to talk immediately after, when the hunters still wanted to see if they could catch up with the escaped demon. I guess it's a good thing it was postponed until nighttime, because Lambert was every kind of done with them XD Caught between, "I got a feeling this is a demon actually" and "if it's not, then coworker melodrama is not something I signed up for when hunting a demon dinosaur" pffft. Good thing he was asleep for that discussion!

But oh that discussion though!!!

The hunter throwing their hypocrisy in their face, of wanting to know the important details but not being provided with them; the fact that they just keep twisting the dagger deeper in trying to keep y/n safe and realizing it too late; and oh gosh especially the part where they tell them they can't hunt this cryptid and that they could make them leave.

Like, for most of the fic y/n has only gotten more and more desperate to prove to them (and themselves) that they CAN deal with the cryptids and protect other people, and yet for so many of them it feels like even through victory, their conclusion is always "they saw me stumble, but maybe they believe in me still". But now it feels that they have been clinging to something that wasn't there and if they already struggled with self doubt, the fact that someone that has lived with them and seen them so closely seems to be confirming that they have never truly been worthy or proved themselves is eating them from the inside out.

And ooooh, when Moon said "we can", oh my gosh I had to stop reading for a few minutes because my brain could not stop throwing possibilities of what could happen if they did do it. (but I see this is already gonna be long so I'll try to leave the scenario that popped in my head for another ask XD Just, all the implications of them knowing Sun and Moon didn't trust them and then losing the trust they had granted to the boys ahhhhh).

But the firmness with which the hunter refused caught my attention. Because it's unthinkable to them. They have explained why they do what they do. How much it means to them. It's a hard boundary right there, telling them to never ask them to leave a hunt again. It's not something they're willing to walk away from. It's what they are, and what they feel gives them purpose. They clutch to the journal like a lifeline because in a way it sort of is. It's all their efforts written down, the only way they know how to live, and the thing they use to assign worth to themselves. Right now it probably feels like the only way to believe in themselves when the ones they want the most to trust them apparently do not.

And aaaah, those last lines after they drifted off! Sun and Moon's resolution to never lie isn't worth much when the secrets make y/n doubt them like this.

Then we get to the boy's perspective!

Not gonna lie, last chapter I was just dying to get a section in which we got to see what they were thinking (though I do think it's fitting we didn't as it really put emphasis on the distance that was growing between them and y/n) so when I saw the one in this one I got so excited! XD Gosh the mention of how they already consumed the hearts of the earlier dead humans and how they placed the flowers back on them after had my heart aching. They love y/n in big part for their kind heart, so they respect this act of kindness even when to them the corpses aren't significant at all. It matters to y/n so it matters to them too! ;o;

And oooh the confrontation with the other demon! They tried to warn it to leave, to not draw so much attention, which is what called y/n to the area in the first place, but that went about expected. So sorry to the boys, but no option but a future confrontation between the hunters and the demon (Oh, I found a neat detail from this conversation that Shoh is able to know the words that people have spoken! There is a lot of power in words after all! A lot of experiences, and emotions!)

God and then they go back and the hurt just continues on. The hunter frantically looking for them in the night, and the boys knowing they are worried, but still unable to tell them anything that won't cause any more hurt just agggghhh!

And then the next day! When they get that moment to talk and the liquid is dripping from them! It's not only the hunter who is crying! (even if they are unable to cry in the same way)

(sidenote: I love all the descriptions of Sun and Moon reacting as if they were receiving physical damage when y/n is cold to them. They're up to this point the strongest being we have seen in the fic, and it's only y/n who can actually hurt them so easily. That's the thing they are discovering about having a heart, huh? It hurts sometimes. Very badly. And yet it's always worth keeping).

But ahhhh, y/n is finally getting some doubts! They shoot them down immediately, again because of their belief that a demon would never do the things Sun and Moon have done for them, but I imagine the fight between them has made place for some wondering to take root. Lucky for the boys, (but not for Lambert), that the demon appeared!

(sidenote 2: when you described the temperature dropping when Shoh appeared, it occurred to me that in the heat of the desert, having them along would probably be very appreciated fdkjsgñkj)

Oh, the fight with Shoh was so cool! Lots happening and I was legitimately wondering if there would come the moment in which the boys would be forced out of the vessel! Oh man, when the detector was crushed and y/n felt it, it made me think of how long it must have accompanied them. Perhaps a silly thought when the cryptid is right in front of them, but once again, y/n puts a lot of them into their work. And that detector probably saved them in more than one occassion. So rip detector, you won't live to see them realize you never lied about the animatronic.

And I also want to say rip Lambert, but uh... that might lend itself for an unfortunate pun given his death fdkjghdkjhñgf Seriously, though, he did hold his ground, managing a couple hits, and I felt the camaraderie when he was encouraging y/n! I feel so bad that his death was so brutal. No wonder y/n was thrown into a nervous breakdown after seeing it happen. Who wouldn't, right?

And then we go back to the issue with how they only see worth in themselves as long as they are brave. As long as they reject the effects of fear and push through them. To me it seems like their job started as a way to fight back against those nightmares. A way to see themselves as more than that terror that wouldn't leave them be after the day in which a demon attacked them. And it was! It probably helped them in a very big way, to feel strong and that they could keep going after such a horrific experience. But now they have sort of let it be only that. Their perspective has shifted and now they seem to have taken it to the extreme in which if they think they aren't capable of ignoring the fear (instead of deal with it) to do what they need to do, even if all circumstances would make it ok for them to fear (the primary function of fear is to keep you alive after all), then they are worthless. (Damaged, they think, and isn't that the whole root of the problem huh?) They think it would be better to prove that not even certain death would deter them from at least trying to do good. To defy the real "nightmare". Dying if it means taking the opponent down because then it would mean they beat the fear. Theirs and all the other people's.

Of course Sun and Moon would want to snap them out of that! Because they are not seeing all that they already are. All the worth they already have just by being themselves. That they ARE brave and it has nothing to do with the desperation to drive fear away. They already are so strong, but they can't throw that away because of their desire to self-punish out of thinking they aren't enough due to the gargantuan expectations they have put on themselves.

And perhaps it's precisely reminding them that that inspires the boys to finally come clean? Of course, there's also the factor of their secrets affecting y/n so badly, that they are hurting them. But also they have witnessed thanks to the hunter what true bravery is. They themselves have never truly had much to lose. They have been around from ancient times, and that might have made them secure in what they know and have experienced, sure of the outcome of most future events. They've protected children, of course, but it certainly wasn't the same. This is new to them. They've probably never been this afraid. Now it's their turn to push against the fear, even if the outcome is uncertain. They are all drowning and it's time to do something about it.

But ahh, that plot twist at the end! I have a feeling... with Vanessa coming, that reveal will not be on their terms. There might be an encounter of three demons now, and I just have no idea how it all is gonna go. I'm. Vibrating. In my seat. From excitement kjlhfskdjg

And there's still a whole episode left after this one! Naff I'm so excited for what you have in store!!! Excellent chapter as always!

"Humble comment" *proceeds to give me the most glorious comment* hehehe ♥ Thank you so much for reading, babe!

Chaotik, I am grabbing my screen right now, very curious about this scenario of yours where the boys take Y/N away. Ahhh, I would love to hear it!!!

Yes, that is a very hard boundary for Y/N! This is their work and they will not abandon it.

"It matters to y/n so it matters to them too!" <<< YES! YES, IT DOES! AH!

"That's the thing they are discovering about having a heart, huh? It hurts sometimes. Very badly. And yet it's always worth keeping." I am kissing you on the forehead for this *smooch*

Oh my gosh, I love that you talk about Y/N's focus on facing what terrorized them so long ago! It did start out as a way to handle their fears, but in recent times with the boys seemingly doubting their abilities as well as other stressful factors, it's begun to take a toll on their thinking and warped their idea from "it's okay to be scared so long as you don't let it stop you," to "you can't be scared anymore because you have to do more and prove that you can take care of everything or else what is the point if you can't stop other nightmares?" It's not healthy, and thankfully, the boys are there to show just that.

The boys are unsure how to navigate a romantic relationship and realize that wow, okay, this is actually not the right way to go about it with our partner. Not to mention, it was a wake-up call to have Y/N call them out for not 'believing' in their bravery, which wasn't correct, but it did reveal their own fears of rejection. So, taking after their heart, they decided it was time to be brave, too.

"There might be an encounter of three demons now" LAJSFDLASFD

POV: You're a cryptid hunter facing three demon cryptids

[sarah-sandwich-writes]

20 Questions - Fanfic Writer Edition

I was tagged by both @writer-or-whatever and @jmrothwell so I suppose I better do it 😅 Thanks guys!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 42 (*gasp* am I Miles Morales?)

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 1,265,660 lol

3. What fandoms do you write for? currently just Spider-Man but I used to write for Supernatural and before that Harry Potter. I'm a one obsession at a time kinda girl.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

Paradise (spread out with a butter knife) - 72k spideypool soulmates au

Don't Freak Out - 136k parkner rivals to lovers speedrun

A Peach Like You - 73k parkner featuring autistic!peter, loveatfirstsight!harley, and a cringe self insert as the villain of the week lmao

The Distance Between (You and Me) - 29k parkner bodyguard au

You're Freaking Out - 166k sequel to DFO featuring plot (wow!) and Miles (yay!)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

My dudes I try. I know I'm not very consistent and I have a tendency to disappear for months at a time, but I read and cherish each one.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

I don't really do angsty endings lol I think the closest I've gotten is Lay Me Down - 8k destiel major character death--lowest kudosed fic out of all 42 lmao

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

This is an impossible question. I am like the queen of happy endings? You want me to rank them??? Fine, it's You're Freaking Out. Best 10k epilogue in the land. Oh hey also I just noticed it has 997 kudos. May I humbly request 3 more pretty please?

8. Do you get hate on fics?

No. Closest was when someone complained on one of my destiel fics about the grocery store not having plastic bags and needing a quarter in order to obtain a cart. I specifically remember they said, "I hate when writers do this," and went on to complain about us making up obviously fake stuff that pulls them out of the story. Like, first of all you're complaining about storytellers making stuff up ??? okay. And second, it was an Aldi. A real grocery store. That I didn't make up.

I had to take a day to cool off before I responded and then they were like oh yeah, my roommate told me when I complained to them, you responded to this really nicely though! WHICH folks LET ME TELL YOU made me angrier lol Like you found out you were wrong and didn't even come back to edit/delete/apologize for your comment???

Anyway after that I internalized that you don't know what kind of lived experience your commenters have so some comments should be taken with a grain of salt. Which is a double-edged sword bc sometimes I get really nice enthusiastic comments and read it like, okay but what if this person is 12 and read it at 2am in a fit of delirium and this is their first fic ever and it's actually not as good as they think haha

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

I doooo. I haven't published any since I wrote for spn but I have a parkner pwp ready to go as soon as I muster up the nerve.

I have no idea how to interpret the question "what kind" lol uhhh the hot kind? pffft

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written?

I have but I never published them. Again, these were for spn which is hella fun to play with merging into other canon. I started but never finished spn crossovers with Firefly, The 100, The Hunger Games, Criminal Minds, Agents of Shield, and Teen Wolf. I think that's all of them. I've been thinking about putting all of my abandoned wips on AO3 for archive purposes, but idk still noodling on it. I wish there way a way I could elect to post without notifying my subscribers :/ Or at least send them a message warning them that I'm about to be incredibly annoying

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

Not that I know of 🙃

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

Yes!! A few now! The ultimate kudo in my opinion, and one I never expected <3

The wonderful @bluettspetal has translated An Insignificant Problem, Undercover? I thought you said under covers..., and Completely and utterly devoid of sex appeal into Russian with plans to translate more.

And Faaayeee42 on AO3 translated Paradise (spread out with a butter knife) to Mandarin Chinese.

I'm forever blown away by this.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

Nope! Done some brainstorming a few times but nothing that has evolved into actually writing out a shared thing. Not sure I'd be any good at it tbh. I'd probably be a very frustrating writing partner.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

Peter Parker/Harley Keener. They're good boys.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

My Infinity War time travel fix it (make it worse) fic 😔 It's got so much potential but it is perpetually at the bottom of the to-do list.

16. What are your writing strengths?

Dialogue and developing relationships

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

mother fucking action sequences and like, coming up with The Plan (the evil kind and the ones to take down the evil kind)

This silly little graphic I made for You're Freaking Out where Harley mocks The Plan made by the spider dumplin gang was initially one half of my brain negging the other half about being shit at making Plans and I decided that it might as well manifest as the characters lmao

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

Eh. It's fanfiction, you know? Do what you want. Experiment. Try your best to do it justice. Accept that some people are going to let their eyes blur and skim over it while others will pick it apart but most will exist somewhere in the middle. Just write what you want to write, how you want to write it.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

*sigh* Harry Potter. Looking forward to my own post getting gobbled up by my block list lmao

20. Favorite fic you've written?

Goodness gracious how do I even decide? I think Peaches Ain't Pretty is my favorite. It's the fic that showed me beyond a shadow of a doubt that I can step outside of fanfiction and write whatever I want and be just as satisfied, if not more.

[alyjojo]

Family Ties ⛪️ - May 2024 - Virgo

Overall Energy: Death

Death, The Tower rev, Justice, and The Hanged Man clarifying…whew. You’ve been through it 💯 All of these being major arcana shows a very intense period of time, most of which you probably haven’t had much control over, and much of which is destined on some level. Or karmic Justice. Probably for other people - and maybe you on some level. The Hanged Man is showing what this has done to you. In most decks, the man places himself on the Tree of Life in order to gain some perspective and wisdom. In this deck, he’s bound to the tree with rope, he definitely didn’t tie his own hands behind his back…and a crowd below him jeers at his plight. Not very peaceful, and definitely hard to gain perspective in the thick of that experience. This is telling you that whatever has ended, whatever is changing in your world, it IS for your protection, and things *will* balance out exactly how they’re supposed to. Justice ⚖️ Does it feel that way now, pffft no.

I see you clearly being validated with this Hanged Man, 7 Wands at the bottom, and 5 Wands in the ancestor messages - fk what other people think or say about what you’re doing, they don’t get to decide. Argumentative people to the left, you don’t have to give them space to care, and you don’t have to fight back. In fact, you shouldn’t. The Hanged Man can also show an energy of surrender, and that there is no fight - there’s not much you can do regarding other people’s problems, which some of these are, even if they affect you too.

Mother: King of Pentacles rev & 8 Swords rev

Oracle: Originality 💡 - Mercury Aquarius

50 Sacred Space

Use beautiful art, music, and creativity of all kinds to put you into a sacred space.

For some, Mom is just a creative type - she’s not into this materialism-based society and could give af less about things like status symbols and career titles. It would be being shown that she did that once and let it go, it’s not for her, could be a stay at home parent or have a job at home somehow - especially in a creative field. If not that, then she may have faced a very difficult ending, losing a long-time job - completely out of her control. Being laid off a few years before retirement. I’m seeing a house fire or wildfire for someone - that’s not a prediction it would be known and past energy by now. Losing what feels like *everything* she had worked so hard to build - specifically on her - if her and Dad are still together, some are. If not, it could be Dad she lost, and her whole life was uprooted and thrown to the wolves 💯 Still, she is very creative, resourceful, and…humble. I’m not getting defensive, or sadness, though it may have existed. There’s an energy of acceptance, and “what comes next”, very practical energy with an air of spiritual even if she’s not. Little things matter to her; she’s the type that would treasure a cup you painted for her for the rest of her life, but not care about owning a home, or whether she has the most updated phone. She might not even have a phone - there’s an off-grid vibe about her. She always has an eye to the future, but I’m not seeing solutions specifically…just a lot of thinking. Trying to figure out what’s right for her, moving forward. If not her, she’s heavily involved in the situation you’re in, you may have lost a job, had to move homes, she may not be the most well-off person either but she provides you with a “safe space” - is how I heard it, more than “sacred”. No judgment whatsoever from Mom, she’s either trying to help you figure it out or doing that herself.

Father: 10 Pentacles & Ace of Cups

Oracle: Intuition 🔮 - Mercury Cancer

Loss 😞 - Saturn Pisces

27 Pause

Accept that you must wait and prepare for developments to reach the next stage.

It’s possible Dad left and is part of a whole new family now, re-married, maybe having other children with the new person. It’s not the main story but it’s here for someone. His actions may have been impulsive, reckless, it probably happened some time ago. This would be a personality of someone who doesn’t really do shit for the original family but goes all out for the new one. It would make sense that you and Mom are forced to accept and surrender to this behavior…what could you do? Intuitively, he knows what he’s done, but it hasn’t really sunk in and won’t for some time. It will someday though, you can bet on that. Karma. If this is all past stuff, it may be right now that he’s waking up to his own actions, with Saturn Pisces being highlighted - and current.

For most, I feel like your parents are together still, and Dad is just very accepting of whatever is going on with Mom (or you). I keep hearing it’s no one’s fault, nothing could be done. A job wasn’t giving, wasn’t reciprocating, it was unreliable and temporary (unknown to whoever dealt with that). Things happen, and it’s okay. If anything, Dad may have faced some hard times in his own life, maybe his family did before, and he gets it - Saturn Pisces is giving empathetic, loving, generous energy, willing to do what he can in times of need. He knows he can control his own part of whatever is going on, and he chooses to cooperate and be supportive to Mom in whatever she does, whatever *she* values - is how I heard it. 10 Pentacles also shows he’s fine, at least on one side there isn’t complete destruction, he probably has a really good job. That’s why The Tower is rev - Dad steps up 💯 He also accepts that no situation is forever. If it’s your situation, same for you, there’s no judgment from Dad either, you’ve got supportive & loving people on your side. If he’s in, he’s all in, and if he’s not then he’ll learn…but probably too late to do anything about it.

Siblings: 10 Wands & Strength

Oracle: Speculation 👀 - Jupiter Cancer

Revenge 👺 - Mars Scorpio

39 Direction

Switch gears, reboot, and try a different direction.

Difficult energy here. Either your parents couldn’t have any more, or maybe just didn’t. If so, it’s something you’re pretty bitter about - or maybe just the circumstances involved. Secondly, again…Dad could have other kids other places, which just pisses you off and you have nothing to do with them. They have the perfect life and you are extremely vengeful at the unfairness of it all, totally fair and you’re being validated for that. Why are you vengeful, because you probably wouldn’t ever do that in the same situation. You’re loyal, but not to those people, and some are kids who have no freaking clue, you just wouldn’t be very close, if you speak at all.

The third possibility is a sibling that you just give up on, you don’t think they give a damn, or they make little to no effort to have anything to do with you & your life - so why would you bother getting involved with theirs? Is it vengeful, yes, do you have a point, also yes. They don’t want to be around - okay, fuck em, that’s basically what I’m seeing with that. The Fool and Direction show one/all of you have gone towards things that feel good to you - and it feels independently. Living your lives. I don’t see any indication that energy is wrong, maybe it’s supposed to be that way.

Grandparents: 8 Cups & 7 Swords

Oracle: Restlessness 🫨 - Mercury Aries

23 Secrets

Conceal plans and actions from those not ready to accept you as you are.

Ick. If Dad left, these would be his parents leaving too. Avoiding you, Mom, not wanting to “get involved”, protecting their own peace…not showing up for you whatsoever. It’s spineless, and self-interested, they’re only concerned with themselves. It’s possible they have unsavory things going on, I’m seeing jail - or rather avoiding someone out of jail. Someone that gets into real trouble, legal trouble, and they’re not the greatest person/people to be around - so you don’t. Or your family doesn’t, someone has cut the ties between you and a known liar/thief/shit disturber, and again I’m seeing this be validated and it’s for the best. Someone here can’t be trusted and either they’ve left, Dad did, or you have. Not missing anything here, and at the bottom there’s no possible change or progress either way that, they will always be this way.

Spiritual Ancestors/Guides: Ace of Wands & 5 Wands

Oracle: Detachment 🫥 - Venus Aquarius

14 Trust

Trust that you were born a creative being and have never stopped being one.

Somehow, this was all a gift. To you, to Mom, to whoever has felt pain and disappointment, whoever has dealt with this Tower rev and Justice. Immature behavior leads to betrayal and a painful ending - on whatever level it’s affecting you. But, it’s moving you where you need to go. I’m seeing this as AWAY from drama, conflict, competition, other people getting in your way of life. If there’s a lot of drama in the family it could be *the* thing that ends up determining your whole dang life path. Like “I can’t do this anymore!” and then bam, next week you’re joining the military and heading off to deploy across the world. Why I got military idk, not for everyone obv. It may be the very reason you choose what you choose, and *that* is the part that’s meant to be.

Especially if you have nothing to do with any of this, you didn’t create this situation nor did you ask for this bs; so why should you have to suffer the drama of it at all? Or if your parents are having a hard time with work/money, you could decide to do something to help them out. Maybe you moved homes during hard times and they’re driving you craaaaazy. Maybe the inner turmoil you have regarding Dad and the new family is what forces you in the direction you’re actually supposed to be going in. In some way, this is Justice, and I keep hearing “karmic” attached to it. This all seems divinely guided for your protection - and how that affects other people isn’t really your concern. The Hanged Man is sacrifice, and a lot of this isn’t even your problem. If it is then it is; and if not you need to detach from whatever you think “should” be, happen, how someone should pay, etc., and start noticing how things are changing with you. Alone. Hermit energy. The true ending I’m seeing here is the ending of a time you felt like loss, endings, abandonment perhaps, were the worst of everything - but I think that’s the perspective that’s changing. Or will.

[thedrunkenreadersreviews]

A reaction to the Goodreads Choice Awards of 2023

Oh, the weather outside is frightful! At least where I live. No snow, but, man, is it cold. So, I am staying toasty with a little rose chocolate tea spiked with some nice peppermint schnapps to get into the holiday spirit because Lord knows I need to get jolly after this shit show.

*Sip, sip*

Anywho, the Goodreads Choice Awards winners have been announced for this year, and while I won't comment on every category because some I simply do not read, I will put in my two cents for any who care to know it about particular categories. I'll go through them one by one in the order in which they appear on Goodreads.

So, grab some nice tea and schnapps, put on those fuzzy socks, and let's get to it.

*Sip, sip*

Best Fiction - Yellowface by R. F. Kuang

In my humble opinion---as I assume that is what you are here for---the Goodreads Choice Awards has become a popularity contest. Now, I do not often read contemporary fiction so I cannot speak fully on this, but I will make one comment; I did not know or have heard of any of the other authors in this category. Just looking at the nominees, I knew without even having read the thing, "Pffft, Yellowface is going to win." Lo and behold.

*Sip, sip*

Now, it is very possible that Yellowface deserved to win. I know of R. F. Kuang's writing through the Poppy War trilogy, which is well crafted, to say the least. Having not read any of these books, I cannot be too harsh. It does twist my lips a bit, however, that this one was predictable without even having to read any of the books in that category, so that's how this "voting" process, I thought, was going to go.

And sometimes ... damn ... sometimes I hate being right.

*Sip, sip*

Romantsy - Fourth Wing by Rebecca Yarros

*Sip, sip, sip, sip, sip, sip*

Oh, a full review of this book will be coming after the holiday season. As with all the others I mention. But this one winning compared to the others in the lineup ...?

We have Foxglove King, The Hurricane Wars, The Jasad Heir, and Assistant to the Villain!

I am in no way suggesting that if you enjoyed Fourth Wing that you are wrong. Having it win in this category with the other nominees feels almost like a worm burrowing beneath my blood if I think on it for too long. The book, I am sorry to say, is just not that great. The romance does not at all feel like romance, it feels like lust. If Goodreads really wants to put books that have "romance" in them that is not legitimate romance, they should create a "Spicy" category or something like that. I did not feel the devotion between the two leads in this book. I did not get the sense that they would do anything for each other, make tremendous sacrifices, or perform grand gestures. I fully believed they wanted to bone each other since they met, but that is all. Yarros, known for her romance books and not her fantasy ones until now since this is her first fantasy book, fails to capture this sense of not needing each other physically, but in all the other ways. I would not be upset if these two end up not being endgame by the conclusion of the series, that is how little I feel for them as a couple.

*Sip, sip*

Yes, I know it is the first book and that the relationship between the two can develop in future books. In that case, let that book, which presents their devotion, be nominated in this category. Not the starting point book.

Fantasy - Hell Bent by Leigh Bardugo

I will confess that I did not read Hell Bent and so I cannot speak to the winner. I did, however, read most of the nominees. Tress of the Emerald Sea is not Brandon Sanderson's best work, but it is not a bad book at all! A Day of Fallen Night ... well, I wasn't that big a fan of Priory either, so I guess it is understandable that I wasn't too entertained with this one.

V. E. Schwab is one of my all-time favorites as that woman has the ability to rip out my heart, stomp it into hardening cement, and shove it back into my chest just for me to come limping back, hands outstretched, begging for more. I still do not forgive some of her past cruelties and yet, I am not complaining. However, I understand why The Fragile Threads of Power did not win this round. Again, not a bad book by any means! I just get why it wasn't the winner. I am currently reading The Witch King, and I am devouring it!

But the one I was rooting for, the one I was hoping would win, even though I knew in my heart that it wouldn't was Emily Wilde's Encyclopedia of Faeries. A review of that book will be posted shortly and perhaps then it will become clear why I was hoping it would win.

As for Leigh Bardugo, great job! Fantasy is the one category I feel might still maintain some creative integrity. But not always.

*Sip, sip*

Also, did anyone else notice that The Unmaking of June Farrow has an eerily similar title and font to The Unbecoming of Mara Dyer, so much so that I thought it was a spinoff series to the latter until I saw the author's name?

*Suspicious sip, sip*

Science Fiction - The Lives of Puppets by T. J. Klune

NO! NO!!! THE FERRYMAN HAS FAILED ME!!! Oh, I was so sure it had a chance! I believed in it ... until I saw the cartoonish cover that brought my thoughts immediately to The House in the Cerulean Sea and then I knew The Ferryman was doomed.

Of course, T. J. Klune would win. I knew it because, no, they are not a bad writer, but they are a resoundingly popular one. The House in the Cerulean Sea was everywhere, that cover art has become synonymous with T.J. Klune. Even if you don't read the synopsis or were aware that a new T.J. Klune book was coming out, you see that cover and you suddenly know without looking for the name, "Oh, a new T.J. Klune book is out." I am almost convinced that a nice chunk of the people who voted for this one didn't even read it. They saw the cover art, heard of House, and clicked "vote."

*Somber sip, sip*

Horror - Holly by Stephen King

I think it should be a rule that Stephen King's works can no longer be nominated (I'm joking). But the same issue still applies; you know the author, you vote for the author, and the lesser-known authors who may have written a horrific masterpiece do not stand a chance against the King.

*Shivering sip, sip*

Young Adult Fantasy & Science Fiction - Divine Rivals by Rebecca Ross

*Sip, sip, sip, sip*

Don't talk to me. Do NOT talk to me! I will not yield on this one! A Curse for True Love (it has its flaws, see my review of it, but still), Foxglove (fucking FOXGLOVE), THE STOLEN HEIR!

Let me say, even though ACfTL was not the masterpiece it could have been, my goodness, the magic in it, especially that finale! But I can excuse Curse not winning. Truly, I'm not that mad about it.

Foxglove?! FOXGLOVE?! Adalyn Grace has grown so much as an author! And Foxglove totally displays that. I was convinced about the whole main plot point until we got to that realization and it's like, I want Wisteria now! I hated and loved Fate the whole way through that damn book. But even that one, I can forgive.

*Sip, sip*

*Peeks from the rim of my cup, eyes caught in the glow of the flames from my hearth*

But ...

you have come after my child.

You have crawled from the depths of a black abyss and come to steal away my precious.

My love for the kingdom of Elfhame cannot be burned away by the fires of Mount Doom.

The dementors cannot steal it from my soul.

The White Walkers cannot freeze me enough to abandon it for the promise of warmth.

And even if I were to be turned to stone by Medusa's gaze my heart would continue to beat with devotion for the High King & Queen of Elfhame as well as all of the inhabitants of Elfhame!

*Sip, sip*

The Stolen Heir by Holly Black, in case you haven't figured it out, is who I was rooting for (review for that one to come around Christmas).

*Calming sip, sip*

Memoir & Autobiography - Woman in Me by Britney Spears

*Raises mug* Go off, Queen!

*Sip, sip*

History & Biography - The Wager (extended title) by David Grann

Surprisingly, I have no qualms with this category. This book was a banger! So was Killing the Witches and Pathogenesis (extended title). I recommend all three of these and was simply wishing one of them would win.

Victory screech!

*Sip, sip*

Now ... my biggest gripe with these choice awards ... where is the Middle Age & Children category? Where is the Graphic Novels, Comics, & Manga category? Where is Poetry?

I don't even read that much poetry, but I appreciate it as an art and believe it should be represented.

Graphic Novels, Comics, & Mangas ... like so many of those have genius writing and storytelling within them. The worlds are incredible and the art sometimes so amazingly compliments it! One of my favorite comic book writers is Al Ewing and one of my favorite artists is Lee Garbet, and when the two of them worked together, it was outstanding! The art and the story went hand in hand so well, it was as if it all came from one mind. They deserve to be acknowledged, even if it is one person doing both.

And manga ... some of the most intricate universes, complex worlds, and ingenious magic systems are created in mangas. One of my all-time favorite stories ever told is Fullmetal Alchemist. Every single detail matters in that story, and it was heartbreaking, and hysterical, and action-packed, and touching all at once!

But to strip away Middle Grade and Children? You might as well discourage kids from reading. It was when I saw that these categories were removed to make room for "romantsy" that I knew this is a popularity contest. It has been for a while. But those in middle school and younger, they probably don't have a Goodreads account, they probably aren't voting.

But they might be looking.

And teachers, and parents. They're still here. And some of them want kids to read.

*Sip, sip*

In conclusion, I don't really believe the choice awards hold that much merit anymore. I couldn't care less if a book was a nominee or a winner when deciding if I should read it. To be fair, I never really did. But I would encourage others who are wandering into the culture of Goodreads and documenting their reading that just because the book is a trend and popular and is a Goodreads choice award "winner" or "nominee" does not mean that the book is good.

It might be mediocre.

*Sip, sip*

Well, I won't take up any more of your time. Reviews for the books I mentioned will be posted in time. If you would like a review for a book in particular, do not hesitate to tell me what it is.

Stay warm, keep calm, and always have a good evening.

Cheers.

*Festive sip, sip*

[calekinnieplus]

At that moment, he saw the water on the surface of the river undulate, rapidly forming a line of white words: “Your loyal and humble servant, Arrodes, is here to report to you on the exploration’s situation.”

“…”

Klein’s mouth turned agape, momentarily losing the ability to speak. Then, a voice echoed in his head: Tell me, why would a perfectly good mirror be a snitch?

(LOTM, Chapter 445)

Good mirror! Very good loyal and humble servant! Good Arrodes! Pffft, Klein. As I previously mentioned... your luck astounds me.

[sarcasticmothdraws]

Hello moth son, husband and i have been discussing. im afraid it is time for peepaw to take action. the batterbro has to win. my first ask on your blog, is me humbly requesting that the peopel vote for batterbro, itll warm my old man heart up.

= Do you really even need this tag? Who else could it be, Peepaw Nato

The tumblr people don't even know where the poll pffft.

[arcstral]

[Ylisse] — The successor of the Archanean minuet, this waltz suits modern Ylissean tastes with easy-to-learn steps, a faster pace, and a closeness to your partner that continues to scandalize the older generations in Ylisse.

How it is that this many years have already come and gone never ceases to amaze, as if it were still only days prior that his very world had been shaken to its core on that early dawnlit morning. Made to reckon with the revelation that there had been a mutuality to unspoken longings all along, as hearts were laid bare and a token of shining promise exchanged hands; an unfulfilled past giving way to a hopeful future between light and shadow. Kris would have once thought it impossible, an illogical fantasy to be eventually cast aside given the barrier of their stations. Yet here they stand now, on a glittering dance floor once more. No longer plagued quite so much by worries of impropriety and self-doubt when there is honest, heartfelt desire at the mind's helm.

“Sire– ...no, Marth.” A rare warmth greets the king's eyes when they meet, his knight's hand already extended in offering. Though they are well beyond the need for such humble requests, Kris asks them all the same– with a note of teasing only heard if one knew to look for it. Humorously intent to repay the favor of an Ethereal Ball past, whether Marth recalled it or not. “Would you do this royal guard the honor of sparing a dance? He seems to have forgotten most of the steps after all this time, you see...”

The light and the shadow; without one there is no semblance of the other, and if this is a law belonging to the natural order, then it belongs to them just as well.

A familiar taper of broad shoulders, a well-known shade of blue, and a cherished ring wreathing the neck before him from a past year's bestowal, all come together in the shape of a man, a knight, and an other half. Already Kris extends to him the faith of a grip that will never waver, a love and loyalty that will never die. Already Marth steps closer as if to fill his arms with Kris, to steer two pairs of feet, one light and one heavy, onto the marble floor for another dance. Another rare and special night come once a year, specially aimed to forget the heavy tendrils of duty that wrapped around them.

But this time- on this Ethereal Ball- there is a stark difference, drawing Marth's eyes wide with a sudden flush of all color from his face, replaced in record timing with a ghostly pallor. "Kris, you. . . you. . ."

So rarely did a natural born Prince find himself at a loss for words, a king even less, and they evaded him now in favor of a stutter. A name bespoken with such ease, for once, sinking heavily into his consciousness like a stone; the anomaly posed by a calling stripped of its usual titles is clear; and the unexpected happiness of it, too, rears its head with transparency. At long last the uneven slope that might sit Marth upon a high throne with the man he loves beneath him has leveled. If he can recall little of his few remaining desires, he realizes now that he always wanted for this.

"—pffft." Joy and surprise risen together to a fever pitch, laughter shutters in the shade of an enclosed fist, hiding behind it the glow of a bright-brimming smile. "Hah! Forgive me, I was only just thinking about how belated such an event has come to occur. That you should call me by name, and my name alone, after so many years spent together. Such a occurrence makes me. . .truly happy."

Two wars, a thousand battles, and then some in their native land, succeeded by a confession, tragedies, joys, and intermittent times of peace, unity, and separation in this one. So much more. Words alone could not etch either the fine details of the bond they share or the larger picture, but perhaps the tender expression on Marth's face could- the careful, tidy placement of his fingers within the other man's as he draws them closer for the Ylissean waltz. Within the realm of propriety, then in the wastelands of its disregard.

"With that said; a dance and nothing more?" Two playful eyes bright like the twinkling of stars, in their nebulous depths is the guidance the Lodestar offers to a kingdom and a world, and now to his clumsy knight loved more than any other. He leans against Kris as if to wear his very shadow, touching his fingertips to the royal guard's mouth- a dancing, skittering touch with the faintest hint of warmth; just as a light ought to impart. "I would be most obliged to remind you of the pattern to any dance, Kris; and to do this, too."

And the heat of two fingers falls away, replaced with a kiss, well and proper.

[gulldusk-of-shadowclan]

🎰 Welcome to my humble Warrior Cats blog where I post hot takes and the occasional full rants among other cool things! Here I take on as my main Warriorsona, titular Gulldusk, who is highly based on me (if you couldn't tell already just by lux's appearance alone pffft)! I also play ask games so if you want to know more about Gulldusk, just send over a question or more! ✨

Main blog is @thefragile-left

[aflyingcontradiction]

The Magnus Archives Relisten: Episode 198 - Precipice

Martin: So, so what, this is our new path then? Some rickety ladder on a cliff edge that’s so high you can’t even see the bottom? Really? Jon: I’ll admit it’s not a subtle metaphor.

... subtler than many in this nightmare realm!

Basira: Martin says that’s London up ahead. (...) Looks even more messed up than usual.

Pffft. Okay, that made me laugh and I'm not even FROM the UK, where the London hate often feels pretty personal.

Melanie: In here.

Melanie sounds so ... bored there. Not at all like she just experienced a horrifying thing. Honestly, both Georgie and Melanie are tragically matter-of-fact about losing the people they've saved, yet again.

My impression of this episode

To be honest, this episode drags a bit. I don't usually mind the banter between characters, but here it just doesn't seem to lead anywhere and it's not even particularly funny. And then the statement is another poem - which really worked a lot better for the Carousel episode, at least in my humble opinion. The placement of this episode also felt weird, it's this dip in the action that doesn't really even contribute to the ongoing plot, only two episodes from the grand finale. This just really didn't work for me.

[hazbincalifornia]

this isn't any concept ramble, i'm just showing up in your asks once again to say that i am personally proud of myself for being the reason this blog has gained a daddy husk tag. i am but a humble servant preaching the catdad gospel.

I've learned that I need to start tagging stuff immediately or I'll never find it again, pffft. But Daddy Husk is good, thank you for your service!

[mlplovelight]

Ch. 10 - Quite a Day

Quite a day, huh APPLEJACK?

Getting to know Twilight was a blast, seeing so many familiar faces return to Ponyville was a treat, and heavens know getting cider with your pals is always a grand ol’ time.

You’re still buzzin’ from all the social interaction as you say goodnight to Sweetcream Scoops and Berryshine, and it’s still pretty early in the night so you decide to swing by Cherry Spices’ place to see if she’s still up to talkin’ to you about her expedition. Hopefully she’s not too mad about you being late!

Cherry Spices has a humble wee villa by the river, so it’s an easy matter of followin’ the water to get to her, and you find her sitting outside the villa. You’re relieved that she’s still up and about tonight, and her eyes light up as she sees you approach, which puts yer mind at ease even more.

“Applejack, you absolute doll!” Cherry Spices cheers as she embraces you in a big hug, rockin’ you back and forth. “I’m so glad you made it!”

“Sorry I’m late,” you say bashfully, rubbing the back of your neck.

“Pffft, water under the bridge, sweetheart,” Cherry Spices scoffs, and then points at the nearby bridge. “You see that? Exactly what I’m talking about.”

“Hehe, I appreciate it,” you say with a bright smile. “So what’s up? You told me you were plannin’ on goin’ into the dungeon in the scrapyard, but that place is locked up tighter than a rattlesnake with uhhh, with uh some kinda thing. Y’know what I’m tryna say here?”

“I do, and I understand your skepticism,” Cherry Spices hums. “But I’ve assembled a crack team of scholars, demolition experts, and muscle. If we can’t make it into that dungeon, well then I’m afraid nopony can.”

“Demolition experts, huh?” you narrow your eyes and puff up your cheeks. “Cherry, I sure hope you ain’t thinkin’ of causin’ too much trouble in them ruins.”

“Not at all!” Cherry exclaims, holding her head up high. “In fact, our main demolitions expert is ALSO our main scholar. She’s a very thorough and historically minded pony, specializing in clearing away dangerous or obstructive debris without damaging the relevant historically significant artifacts. You should see her in action, she’s quite the miracle worker.”

“Anypony I know?” you ask curiously, already intrigued to meet this so-called miracle worker.

“Her name’s Firecracker Burst,” Cherry Spices says, and you give a helpless shrug. Doesn’t ring a bell. “I’ve worked with her a few times, I know she’s good. I’d say you two would get along famously, but she’s a rather introverted sort so social interaction isn’t exactly her forte. But she gets the job done, and that’s what counts.”

“Sounds like you got all yer ducks in a row,” you say happily, feeling quite impressed at Cherry Spices’ organizational efforts. “What do you even need me for?”

“Nopony knows this town or those ruins like you,” Cherry Spices says, putting her hoof underneath your chin and lifting your head up a bit. “And I know you are very meticulous about doing things the proper way, so as not to cause friction with the spirits that linger in the area. I’d like you to guide us through the ruins so that we can get this done with as little fuss as possible.”

“Aw, shucks, I appreciate—“

“But more importantly,” Cherry Spices puts her hoof over your lips and smiles at you, “if we can unlock this dungeon, this is going to be the gold rush of a lifetime. You’ve worked hard, Applejack. Harder than anypony I’ve met. You deserve to be a part of this big break.”

“Th-thank you, Cherry Spices,” you mumble awkwardly, your cheeks burnin’ at like a hundred degrees. It feels good to be praised for your hard work, but for her to lay it on so thick is kinda embarrassing, but like in a nice way. “I—I dunno what to say.”

“Say you’ll help us,” Cherry Spices says with a bright smile.

“Yeah, of course,” you nod confidently. “I mean, I was gonna help ya even before you said all that nice stuff about me.”

“Excellent!” Cherry Spices cheers and grabs you by the hooves. “I knew I could count on you, my sweet doll!”

Your face turns all red again; you’re not sure how to feel about all her affectionate pet names, other than that you are maybe a little too lesbian to just be called a ‘sweet doll’ by a beautiful woman.

“I am trying not to get my hopes up TOO high,” Cherry explains, “but I feel like unlocking the secrets of the dungeon will play a big part in understanding the true mystery of Old Equestria. The power of alicorn magic.”

“Alicorn magic?” you ask blankly, and your mind immediately turns to Emerald Ray. She claimed to be an alicorn herself, and you thought she was just pullin’ yer leg, but the more you think about it… the less sure you are. “Isn’t that stuff… I dunno, wasn’t it all like smoke and mirror stuff from back in those days?”

“I’m surprised to hear you say something so off the mark, dear,” Cherry Spices arches an eyebrow at you, and now you feel like you’ve been put on the spot.

“Well, I just mean that—“

“The alicorns shaped the landscape of Equestria as we know it,” Cherry explains passionately, and you elect to just let her talk over you, since you apparently have no idea what you’re talking about. “True, their power seems a bit hard to believe when placed against the rather humble magic of earth ponies, but they were very much real.

“And I believe the secrets of their power aren’t as long forgotten as many ponies believe.”

“What makes you say that?” you ask curiously.

“I’ve traveled many places, Applejack,” Cherry Spices continues, her passion only intensifying, “and I’ve heard many rumors of winged ponies who live in cities that fly through the air, of ponies with magic horns hiding deep within the forests.”

“You really believe all that stuff?” you ask, kicking your hoof in the dirt. “About pegasi and unicorns still bein’ real, and living out there in hiding? Seems a little farfetched, don’t it?”

“I’m surprised a historically minded pony like you DOESN’T believe,” Cherry says. “You’ve seen the art and writing in Old Equestria, you know that pegasi and unicorns must have existed once. What makes you think they’re not still out there?”

“I guess it’s just that, if they ARE out there, then the world is a lot bigger than I always thought it was,” you say bashfully, sitting down on your haunches and hanging your head shamefully. “And that’s scary, to think there’s a whole world out there and I understand so little of it.”

“Applejack,” Cherry Spices tilts up your head, holding her hoof gently under your chin, “if we are able to unlock the secrets of this dungeon, the world is about to get a whole lot bigger. I need you to be prepared for that.”

You don’t know what to say. You want to be helpful to Cherry Spices and her expedition, and you want things to go well for her, but… well, you already said it yourself. It’s scary to think there’s a whole world out there. The world outside your hometown could be so very big, and you are just one little pony.

“That’s a beautiful piece of jewelry you’ve got on,” Cherry Spices says.

“Oh, this?” you ask, jingling the Friendship Bracelet. “A friend helped me make it.”

“That cute little purple thing, right?” Cherry asks with a knowing grin.

“Heh, yep,” you nod. “Twilight Sparkle. She seems like a real sweetheart.”

“Always warms my heart to hear about you making new friends,” Cherry Spices smiles, and then her ears perk up and she taps her cheek. “Oh! Speaking of friends, have you seen Daisy Dreams?”

“I ran into her this morning, yeah,” you say. “Why do you ask?”

“Watch out for her, will you?” Cherry Spices says coldly. “She’s up to something sketchy. I think she might be smuggling a pony.”

“EXCUSE ME?” you exclaim, taking a step backwards in shock. “Cherry, you can’t just accuse someone of smuggling a pony!”

“You think I make that claim lightly, Applejack?” Cherry glares at you, her tone as firm as a solid stone. “Daisy Dreams, bless her heart, is a business rival, so I always need to keep some kind of eye on her. But my birds in her organization are being bizarrely mum about her recent activities.

“There are only a few things that would cause them to be so tight-lipped, even to me, and other factors at play make me believe it’s pony smuggling. Likely some kind of criminal hired her services to transport them from one place to another under the radar.”

“That’s… quite a claim,” you say flatly. Your mind immediately goes to the giant suitcase Daisy Dreams was traveling with, the one that was conspicuously pony-sized.

There’s no way, it couldn’t be… could it? Nah, no shot. Now you’re just being completely paranoid!

“Whatever she’s up to, I don’t like it,” Cherry Spices sighs and shakes her head. “But I’ve got my hooves full with this expedition, so Daisy Dreams’ mysterious goings-on will have to wait.”

“I see,” suddenly you’re not feelin’ so well. “I think I’m gonna go turn in for the night, Cherry. It’s gettin’ late. I’ll talk to you tomorrow about the expedition, okay?”

“Sounds good,” Cherry Spices nods. “I can count on you to come with, right?”

“Yeah, I’ll be there,” you force a slight smile, for your own sake as much as for Cherry’s. “Goodnight, Cherry Spices.”

“Goodnight, Applejack,” she says sweetly. “Pleasant dreams.”

You walk away from the conversation feeling dizzy. There’s a lot to unpack there, kinda like there would be a lot to unpack from a suitcase that is conspicuously the size of a pony!

No, don’t start going there. You got no reason or basis to be worried about Daisy Dreams, she’s a sweet pony who wouldn’t get involved with messed up stuff like smuggling criminals back and forth.

…

But maybe it wouldn’t hurt to just go check up on her. Or at the very least, give her a head’s up that Cherry Spices has an eye on her. That sounds like somethin’ a friend would do.

You head on over to Daisy Dreams’ place, she owns a little warehouse on the northern side of town. The perfect place to hide a smuggled pony—no, stop that! You’re gonna be cool about this and not get all paranoid and freaked out!

Daisy Dreams is a nice gal, and you trust her. Which is exactly what makes it so scary to imagine that she might be up to no good, cuz if you trust her and she’s a bad pony, what does that make YOU?

You note that you are not doing a very good job at being cool about this.

You knock at the door of Daisy Dreams’ warehouse, your heart pounding in your ears. You sit there in silence, wondering what you’re even doing here. You feel completely insane, about to ask a friend such a drastic, accusatory, and downright ludicrous question.

You’re just about ready to pack up and leave, when the door opens and Daisy Dreams walks outside, a kind smile on her face. She looks exhausted, as she often does, but you can tell she’s trying her best.

If you’re gonna broach this topic, Applejack, you need to do it with some sense of tact and dignity.

“Oh! Hello, Applejack,” Daisy Dreams says. “What can I—“

“Are you smugglin’ ponies?” you blurt out. “Cherry Spices said you might be.”

Absolute dead silence.

“Ehhhh, e-excuse me?” Daisy Dreams laughs awkwardly, and you shamefully bury your face in your hooves.

“I’m sorry, Daisy Dreams, I dunno what I was thinkin’,” you shake your head and mutter into your hooves. “My brain is all screwed up on account of me bein’ stupid.”

“Uh, what did Cherry Spices say to you exactly?” Daisy Dreams asks.

“She said you were up to somethin’ sketchy,” you explain, “and that her people in your group weren’t tellin’ her anything.”

“So she DOES have people in my group,” Daisy Dreams mutters, tapping her chin. She turns back to you and lets out a slight laugh. “But what made her, or you, think I was smuggling ponies? My business is in collecting scrap, same as yours.”

“C-cuz you got… that big suitcase, it’s like… pony size.”

The more you speak, the more stupid you sound.

“Oh, is that all?” Daisy Dreams laughs. “That’s for hauling scrap, duh. I don’t have a lot of horsepower, so I gotta lug a lot of the loot around myself. I need a big pack so I can carry as much as possible.”

“Yeah,” you sigh and hang your head, feeling equal parts relieved and humiliated. “OF COURSE that’s what it was. I’m so sorry, Daisy Dreams, I dunno what came over me.”

“It’s okay, Applejack,” Daisy Dreams chuckles. “I know that talking to Cherry Spices can be intoxicating, she could get a pony to believe the sky is red.”

“You can say that again,” you say, and you and Daisy share a good laugh.

“Hey Daisy, who you talking to?!” suddenly a bright pink pony you’ve never seen before comes bouncing out of Daisy Dreams’ warehouse, a big smile on her face. Your eyes widen at the sight of her, and your jaw drops.

“Pinkie Pie! I told you to stay inside!” Daisy Dreams chastises the pink pony with a shrill whisper, but you barely hear it; you’re completely taken aback by the appendages flared out on either side of the pink pony’s barrel.

This pony has WINGS.

[abandoned-as-mustard]

Laaaaame! Instagram is now blocking videos on private accounts because of copyrighted songs! And they don't even let you view the supposed offending video, which apparently posted "in july "but they can't be even arsed to tell me WHICH JULY. LAAAAAME.

[ratmonky]

something i post gets 3+ likes

me:

[officialladynoirette]

It’s all gucci good Marinette. It’s alllllllll good.

Not pictured: Adrien nodding and understanding exactly what Chloé meant