#though leaving the master for dead is basically the equivalent of putting him down for a nap
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idkaguyorsomething · 1 year ago
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the fourth funniest part of the five doctors is when the high council of gallifrey brings the master into their meeting room and he goes “hehehe, try and force me to do your bidding at your own risk 😈” and then they tell him that someone’s been kidnapping different incarnations of the doctor so could he pretty please maybe go on a rescue mission and he literally says “a universe without the doctor scarcely bears thinking of đŸ„ș”.
then every single version of the doctor that he tries to rescue is just like “¡yeah right, sayonara bitch!” and leaves him for dead.
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jgabriel1920 · 2 months ago
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JESUS CHRIST I ALMOST DIDN'T POST TODAY. Literally almost immediately failed Johnnytober. Anyway.
Johnnytober 1°: double penetration.
Martha x Miss.Mayberry x Blackwater(oc)
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what went wrong?
Seriously, Blackwater had to wonder. He had a simple mission: get the territory on the border of pride. Straight to the point, all he had to do was convince anyone that lived there and kill who disagreed or was too wild.
There weren't even many people there, just a couple near the imp town and some World War stragglers in a poor made bunker.
Yet here he was.
"Fucccckk~ Go harder~"
"Yeah cmon speed up, donkey~!"
Urgh.
Yes, he was fucking two women at the same time. Rather crude, but there wasn't any better way to put it.
Well, there was. Like he could describe double girthy and lengthy dicks stacked on top of each other, constantly entering and leaving the ladies cunts, even frictioning between them as a bulge appeared at their belly each time in went deep.
Perhaps, he could explain how the both women clashed tongues between them, doing the equivalent of a tango by how much they twisted together, minus of course the saliva dripping from their mouths and sliding to one of their chests, as their breasts clashed together and sometimes rubbed together their hard nipples.
All things he wasn't a fan of. He wasn't homophobic, just not found of this intimate connections, no matter the gender, specifically if their happening only because one of them has the ability to shapeshift.
One million dollars to guess who it was.
"Fucking hell I said faster!" One of the women, Martha by her thick southern tone, exclaimed while kicking his ass. Literally.
"If I do it any faster I will hit your organs." He said in a matter of fact tone. Maybe better description would be sarcasm but he genuinely was surprised by how both were alive to this point. There wasn't even any need, he knew from biology books that the female g-spot was located near the entrance, and certainly didn't need to be poked by a 20 inch pole the size of a light machine gun.
"Does it look like it m-matters~? Mmmh~ just do it~!" Miss.Mayberry said weakly, more like one would dealing with a monstercock (he couldn't believe that though occurred in his head.)
"If I want it you two dead I just shoot you." He warned yet again. Couldn't both wait? It was just a war of attrition at this point.
"All I hear is a little coward~!"
"You think this insults will work? I not doing it."
"Cmon boy~ won't you do it for mommy- AH~!"
"I don't have any masters to control me." He snarled through his teeth as he pushed the top one down, pounding fervently at them. "If I have to prove it throught your ruined guts then so be it."
These imbeciles thinking they could talk him down? Him? He was the one that planned for 30 years the fall of the hierarchy of hell, he was the one so close to proving even destiny wrong, and he wouldn't be outsmarted by a couple of freaks in the middle of nowhere.
The wet slaps reverberated though the house, the two ladies moaning and whimpering like bitches in heat. Stench of sweat stung around with the smell of sex, and the smell of cum when he finally climaxed.
His vision actually went dark for a moment, but it went back to normal... Which was just the corners being black.
It took a few seconds, long seconds, but it all went all. They all breathed heavily and deeply, seeking for air like they ran a marathon.
In the end, Blackwater got out as quick as his trembling legs could, morphing into a more discreet figure to get out, basically having nothing down there since if he had a pussy it would drench his pants the moment he completed formed it. Speaking of which he was fully clothed and on the exit door in seconds.
"W-Wait a second-"
"No. Calm me only if you die, please."
Oh, the sacrifices he made for democracy.
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Did someone miss the manhunt gifs~?
...
No?
Awh okay :( also wrote this in a cocaine fulled streak at 9 pm. And maybe sparrowrye might be a bit traumatized in seeing Blackwater this way-
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unforth · 3 years ago
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A Non-Definitive and Certainly Incomplete List of the Differences Between the Qianqiu/Thousand Autumns Danmei Novel and the Donghua
@blacktigersprings commented on one of my Thousand Autumn Liveblog posts, asking about the differences between the donghua thus far, compared to the book - they'd seen the 16 episodes, but hadn't read it yet. After I wrote down what I could remember I was like...ya know what, I should just make all this into a post.
This is non-exhaustive. I am a tired person with a bad memory and a lot going on, so I am sure I forgot things. I'm gonna ping @baoshan-sanren since they're the main person I know who is in Thousand Autumns fandom also, and I'm willing to guarantee they will think of things I didn't, and also probably be able to correct me if I mixed anything up. I'll try to edit this based on new info, if I have the time, and I might post it as meta on AO3? I did that with my list of differences between CQL and MDZS and people found it helpful so...yeah. I'll add a link if a do.
Note that all posts like this rely to some extent on interpretation; what I write reflects my interpretation and understanding of events (...to the extent I remember them...) and others may have read/watched the same sequences and reached different conclusions. I've made specific notes where I think I'm raising a point that's more subjective than others.
This contains spoilers for all 16 episodes of the donghua, and for the equivalent parts of the novel. I did my best not to put in novel spoilers for past when the donghua ends, but there are allusions to subsequent events.
Anyway - vaguely in chronological order of when they happen?
(read more)
Overall, the basic premises of the donghua and the novel are pretty different. In the donghua, there are several primary conflicts - the intrusion of the Beimi/Tujue, the competition over access to the Solarity, the competition between different sects' top masters, and the search for that ring that Yan Wushi has. In the novel, these are all things that exist, but they're not the primary plot, and they're all at least somewhat difference. While the novel has multiple plotlines that focus on different things, looking at it as a whole, the main plot is a political one about control of the Empire, and how different sects are pulled into that conflict as a result of how the Emperor relates to Confucian, Daoist, and Buddhist sects. Which tradition each sect follows is much more important and relevant in the novel. The Beimi/Tujue plot is still relevant and involved, but it's just one thread in the political milieu. The Solarity, which has different and long name in the novel that I never remember - it's like, "the complete works of (some master who's name isn't in my brain" - is in six volumes, and it's definitely still important, but it's importance kinda fades as the novel progresses (though it's still a main piece at the point where the donghua leaves off). The ring is basically non-existent in the novel - instead of it being in Yan Wushi's possession, it's in the possession of the woman who's birthday party Shen Qiao goes to (...Madam Su? Might be her name? I'm sorry, I'm not great with names, and I usually rely on fandom wikis but this one is sparse) - in the novel, she was a disciple of Hulugu, and then she stole the ring and returned to the Empire. That other Beimi/Tujue disciple (...Dong something??) takes it back and returns with it to his clan, if I recall correctly, so it can be used to unify those clans to make war against the Empire.
In the donghua, Yan Wushi is just...generally portrayed as pretty nice, and the YanShen vibes start pretty early - there's an early sign of playful flirting from Yan Wushi that actually seems sincere? At least it did to me. As a result, the YanShen vibes feel a lot stronger than they do in the novel at a similar point in the narrative. In the novel...I'd personally say Yan Wushi has zero interest, romantically or sexually, until well after where the donghua left off, and their relationship isn't canon until nearly the very end, and is always left more implied than...outright. I would personally say that in the novel, Shen Qiao has some feels for Yan Wushi pre-Sang Jingxing, but Yan Wushi doesn't reciprocate (except maybe at a deep level he refuses to acknowledge). It's not until he's healing post-almost-dying (as in, during the time immediately after when the donghua leaves off - I'm trying to be vague to avoid giving spoilers to people who haven't read it) that there start to be some real clear signs that Yan Wushi may have caught some feels, and even then it's complicated. They're complicated. They're also complicated. It's part of what I love about them, lol.
In the donghua, the fight between Shen Qiao and Kunye is shown "on screen" instead of only being described afterwards, and it's revealed almost right away that Shen Qiao was poisoned. Also, a lot of people help Kunye and they all fight Shen Qiao together. In the novel, this fight is off-screen. It's strictly a one-on-one battle between Shen Qiao and Kunye, and the reader doesn't learn that Shen Qiao lost due to poisoning until Shen Qiao goes to Mount Xuandu to confront Yu Ai.
In both the donghua and the novel, when Yan Wushi is trying to turn Shen Qiao evil, he sets up a mission for Shen Qiao and Yu Shengyan, The object of this mission is to kill a family that serves the Hehuan Sect. Shen Qiao refuses to participate, and helps them escape. In the donghua, they don't actually escape, and the "they serve Hehuan" thing turns out to be a ruse; they actually serve Yan Wushi. In the novel, they're actually Hehuan spies, and Shen Qiao still helps them, and they actually escape.
(RAPE MENTION TRIGGER WARNING) In the donghua, Chen Gong betrays Shen Qiao when that jerk noble whose name I can't remember right now (and it's not in the wiki, god the wiki is so slim, I wish I had time to help with that) hunts him for sport, and he doesn't want to die. In the novel, Chen Gong betrays Shen Qiao when that same jerk noble, who as a reputation for using pretty boys as sex slaves, tries to kidnap Chen Gong as a sex slave, and Chen Gong is like, "no no you don't want to fuck me, I know someone WAY prettier for you to rape." (The fall out remains the same in both - Shen Qiao beats up the guy, nothing bad happens to him, and he and Chen Gong part ways).
In the donghua, Shen Qiao goes to confront Yu Ai at Mount Xuandu by like. Literally walking up to the front gate. And then all the disciples for some reason get mad that Yan Wushi comes, even though he...also walked up to their front gate. Why do they even have a gate??? In the novel, Shen Qiao uses a super sneaky back way, only known to disciples, and so it actually makes some kind of sense when Yu Ai et al are like SHEN QIAO WHY ARE YOU SHOWING THE EVIL GUY OUR BACK DOOR?
(NOTE this one relies more on subtext and thus is very open to interpretation. What's written here reflects my personal interpretation, and others may disagree). In the donghua, when Yan Wushi hands Shen Qiao over to Sang Jingxing, they have a chat that heavily implies that Yan Wushi is kinda-sorta-not-so-secretly thinking that Shen Qiao could win a fight (and is probably expecting Shen Qiao to do so by using the demonic core that has been implanted in him). Sang Jingxing also says things that indicate that he thinks that Yan Wushi is setting a trap for him. In the novel, while it's never all that clear what Yan Wushi's motivations are, it becomes pretty clear by the point of the Sang Jingxing fight that Yan Wushi was serious when he said he didn't care about Shen Qiao, didn't consider him worthy, and doesn't care what happens to him. He definitely handed over Shen Qiao with every intention of Shen Qiao getting tortured and raped, and had no interest in saving him. Shen Qiao only becomes interesting to Yan Wushi afterwards. Yan Wushi is never only playing one game, so he may have thought that being pushed into a corner would force Shen Qiao to use the demonic core, but it also seemed to me like he genuinely didn't care - he'd gotten bored, and was done playing with the "new toy" that was Shen Qiao.
In the donghua, there is a shot of someone - the clothing is pretty unmistakably Yan Wushi's purple robe of ultimate purpleness - pulling Shen Qiao out of a river after he plunges to his almost-demise in the fight with Sang Jingxing. In the novel, Yan Wushi doesn't pull Shen Qiao out of the water, after Shen Qiao destroys his meridians in the fight against Sang Jingxing. Instead, Shen Qiao collapses in the mountains, where he is found by Shiwu and brought back to the monastery for treatment.
In the donghua, Yan Wushi is fighting the four masters who have it in for him, and before the end of the fight, Shen Qiao arrives and tries to help him; he fights the four masters solo to try to keep Yan Wushi from using his powers and harming himself, and when he's about to lose, Yan Wushi...uses his powers and harms himself. In the novel, Shen Qiao doesn't arrive until after Yan Wushi has been defeated; he finds Yan Wushi almost dead and brings him to a small village nearby, where he stays with a nice girl and her...grandfather, iirc...and tries to keep them safe while nursing Yan Wushi back to health.
In the donghua, it's kinda implied that Shen Qiao goes to rescue Yan Wushi because, like...he likes him? There's not really a reason given, just that he wants to, or maybe to keep the ring from going to the Beimi/Tujue? In the novel it's pretty explicit that Shen Qiao goes to save Yan Wushi because he believes Yan Wushi's position in the Empire is critical to the stability of the world - and he wants the world stable, so that there won't be more refugees, starvation, etc. That he also may like Yan Wushi is the case but is almost incidental; Shen Qiao is focused on doing the most good for the most people, and that means saving Yan Wushi, because Yan Wushi is critical to the Empire, and the Empire is critical to the common people. (this is a major part of the political themes that are more prominent in the book than in the donghua).
I can't actually remember when Bian Yanmei was introduced in the novel? But I was pretty sure it was around when Yan Wushi sends Shen Qiao to that birthday banquet? Anyway, Bian Yanmei isn't in the donghua at all thus far; in the donghua, Yan Wushi's only apparent disciple is Yu Shengyan.
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theoriginalcarnivorousmuffin · 4 years ago
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This is a bit random but if characters from your fics lived in the Atla universe what element would they bend? Personally I think Lily would still have all her powers which would result in people thinking she's the avatar even though she's not, Obito would be a firebender, Minato an airbender and Lenin dearest would be a waterbender/bloodbender/maybe the avatar?. This is just the vibe I get tho-
Who needs bullet points when we can do a far too thought out AU that spans multiple fandoms/recursive works that will never happen? 
More to the point, elements in AtLA is a mix of personality (we see earth benders as often brash and stubborn, water benders as adaptive, etc.) but also simply genetics. So, while I get that’s kind of the point of this post, it’s a bit weird to me to assign an element solely on personality. 
So with that, let’s get started.
The Setting
Just to make things fun let’s make our AU take place sometime between Sozin’s first comet and Roku’s death and Aang awakening from that iceberg. The air benders have been wiped out, seemingly with no survivors, the South Pole has been invaded and the water benders from there captured and brought back to the Fire Nation, many of the colonies in the Earth Kingdom have been established, but the North Pole and great cities in the Earth Kingdom still stand.
The Avatar hasn’t been missing for one-hundred years yet, but he’s been missing for decades and people are coming around to the idea that maybe he’s really not going to show up. 
Wizard Lenin/Tom Riddle
In this AU we’ll give Tom Riddle a slightly more traditional shitty background. Since we can’t really have a Tom in the AtLA universe he’s going to have the AtLA generic equivalent name that canon even jokes about: Lee. Lee is the mixed heritage son of a Fire Nation lord and a water bender from the south pole who grows up in a Fire Nation orphanage. And yes, this does happen in the absolute worst way you can possibly imagine, one of the imprisoned water benders from the south pole is raped.
As for Tom (Lee, you get the idea) arriving at an orphanage instead of being imprisoned/taken in as a son, well I’ll leave that to imagination but we can imagine a relatively compassionate guard, a dash of luck, or perhaps someone being an idiot and thinking “oh just dump it in an orphanage, there’s no way it will turn into a water bender too”
So, Tom grows up in an orphanage and looks just a bit... different from everyone else and is clearly not purely from the fire nation. I’m imagining much darker skin (and POC Tom Riddle is the weirdest thing in the world to contemplate, but here we are) and the pale blue eyes.
Tom grows up, dreaming probably of entering the military and winning himself glory, prestige, honor, and clawing out of this impoverished life he was born into. He undoubtedly desperately hopes he’s a fire bender, as not only is it cool but they have the best chance of making it in the world, and probably stays up late for many nights fruitlessly attempting to shoot fire out of his hands.
Unfortunately for Tom, sometime when he’s probably around eight or so, turns out he’s actually a water bender. Naturally, Tom has a huge meltdown and existential crisis as this means something’s terribly terribly wrong. More, all his hopes are ruined, as while a non-bender can make it a bender who is not a fire bender is a foreigner and traitor to the state.
Tom runs away and being a precocious child is able to make it on his own and about the country probably pulling off Toph-like scams. Eventually he runs into a much younger Hama who has just escaped prison and not yet started on her scary old lady adventures of imprisoning random villagers in caves. Hama goes, “of course, yes my child, I knew your mother” and gives Tom the whole horrible rape tale along with “I will teach you everything I know including my scary blood bending”. So Tom learns scary blood bending, probably stays with Hama a few years, and then realizes Hama isn’t going anywhere.
Hama’s content kidnapping random people into caves. At this point, angry and suddenly very pro-water bender Tom wants to murder the Fire Lord and his entire goddamn family and put himself in charge. Go big or go home, am I right?
So Tom leaves, Hama probably saying, “Come back any time, my beautiful murder child” and probably goes exploring the world in search of how the hell he’s going to bring down the Fire Lord. He also probably murders his entire father’s family and steals all his money, but that’s a different story. I imagine he goes to the North Pole where he learns that, as much of a water bender as he is, that he’s the son of someone from the Fire Nation closes pretty much every door to him. He’ll always be an outsider and the North Pole is very frosty towards him.
According to Hama, the South Pole is in shambles, so Tom probably doesn’t even bother going. 
So Tom probably goes and bums around the Earth Kingdom, loitering in Ba Sing Se and Omashu, looking for that damned Spirit Library in the desert, etc. for a good number of years as he works to perfect his water bending and make himself an instrument of death.
And then he meets an alien and everything changes.
Lily
Tom probably manages to wander around the spirit world at one point in his late teens and probably almost gets eaten by something terrifying. While he learns much it’s not really anything useful and is more in the “too cosmic horror for Tom” variety. More than that though, something follows him back out.
When he comes to back in the real world there’s this thing sitting next to him that looks enough like a person but also like someone told a gifted artist what humans look like and they got it mostly right but also went a little nuts. It’s a girl, a few years younger than him, who has flaming red hair, absurdly green eyes, pale skin, and facial features he can’t recognize for the life of him (Lily still looking western in this to up the ante of ‘she’s an alien folks’).
Tom sacrifices his dinner to it and hopes it doesn’t eat him.
It explains that it’s a tourist from another dimension, beyond even the Spirit World, and that it’s come to see what the mortal world is all about. Tom is naturally very weirded out but at this point decides to roll with it.
Except it doesn’t leave and clearly expects Tom to play tour guide.
He does, reluctantly, because he doesn’t want to be eaten but he also sort of gets used to the thing. Then, one day, it starts bending multiple elements with utter ease and Tom is at first flabbergasted and horrified (only to remember that spirits can do what they want and aren’t like lowly mortals who can only bend one element) and then he gets the idea.
The Avatar, lazy bastard that he is (and Tom might be a little more than slightly bitter that he himself is not the Avatar), appears to be MIA and not coming back any time soon. The entire world it seems is waiting for the Avatar to come and save them. But, Tom says to himself, who needs the Avatar when you can just have an Avatar. An Avatar and, of course, her water bending master.
Thus, the scheme is set, Tom will teach this weird alien thing how to a) act like a goddamn human in public and b) water bending and together they will pretend she’s the Avatar and got lost in the spirit world a few decades ago (which accounts for the youthful age and the weird appearance) and use this to gain allies, topple the Fire Nation, and eventually give the throne to Tom.
Lily, who doesn’t know the difference between being a tourist and taking over a nation, goes along but is basically this story’s answer to Uncle Iroh always getting distracted by Pai Sho.
Haru/Dead Last
Given that they’re in the Earth Kingdom, and that Lee picks up water bending insultingly quickly which makes Tom fume in rage, they go to pick up an earth bending master/spread the word that the Avatar has returned from her multiple decades long vacation. 
Along the way they probably run into Haru, who is the world’s most useless excuse for an Earth Bender. As always, he’s so average looking you can barely remember what he looks like beyond “generic earth bender”. 
They probably watch him for two seconds, Lily asks if this is it, and Tom Riddle says, “what a joke”. 
Minato Namikaze
Given that all the air benders are dead we’re going to make Minato a very talented earth bender (it is also very weird to imagine a dark haired/dark eyed Minato, but I suppose we’re going to roll with it). This also, to me, does fit his personality a little better as while he is a leaf on the wind kind of guy he also does dig his heels in and get very stubborn now and then.
Minato’s young, younger than Tom (Lee), but he’s incredibly talented and clever. To keep his shinobi background mostly in tact I imagine that Minato is a swiftly rising member of the Dai Li, stationed in Ba Sing Se, but who occasionally goes on intelligence missions to the other feudal powers in the Earth Kingdom.
So I imagine Lily and Tom run into him unnervingly frequently, probably first meeting him off duty in Omashu where he does his “extremely polite and friendly local guide” routine to show the pair the city (never mind that Tom insists he’s been to Omashu plenty of times goddammit). Despite this, Lily and Minato become friends, Lily easily confessing she’s the Avatar (which Minato at first thinks is a joke, even if she looks strange, then goes ‘oh my god, it’s not a joke). 
Eventually Minato is stationed to spy on them under the guise of teaching Lily earth bending. So he joins the gang. Tom, who knows exactly what’s going on, is not amused while Lily is just happy to collect another friend who will actually play Pai Sho with her. 
Kushina Uzumaki
Kushina is a earth bender, hands down. I debated making her a water bender (because whirlpool) but that personality is just pure earth bender material. Besides, I can just picture her so easily coming from Kyoshi. 
So Kushina’s an earth bending Kyoshi warrior, who while ten times as powerful as Minato, also lacks any of his control or cleverness. Kushina has undoubtedly left Kyoshi, abandoning their neutrality, to join the war and kick some fire bender ass.
She does this but along the way frequently runs into the gang where she annoys the ever loving shit out of Minato (her new rival) and claims that Avatar Lily is her new idol.
Rabbit
Rabbit is a mysterious spirit from Lily’s past that she refuses to talk about except in the darkest of terms promising doom and destruction the likes of which the world has never seen.
No one knows how to react to this. Or what a plain old ‘rabbit’ even is.
Tobirama Senju
Because no story’s not complete without Tobirama, I imagine he’s a stuffy waterbender and scholar from the North Pole who Tom is miffed at as the man refused to teach him even more water bending. Tobirama naturally feels that the day he teaches a blatant spy is the day he goes and drowns himself. 
Later, when Tom has picked up the Avatar and Tom rubs it in his face, Tobirama probably reluctantly spends a day or so teaching them something/fighting off the hordes of Fire Nation soldiers on their tale (it’s not Avatar if the gang isn’t constantly chased by fire benders).
Obito Uchiha
Obito is the answer to a fire bending instructor. Obito’s a firebender and the youngest son of a wealthy Fire Nation lord. However, Obito’s the black sheep of the family that everyone hates, a late bloomer when it comes to his bending, and is seen as bringing dishonor on the family.
Itching to prove himself, Obito becomes a soldier and goes to the Earth Kingdom, and eventually decides the best way to earn recognition and restore his honor is to capture the newly resurrected Avatar. Congratulations, Obito, you’re this story’s Zuko. 
Obito, while not the most talented fire bender at first (though as he gets older he gets dangerously good at it) is extremely clever and becomes the largest threat to the gang. 
That said, Obito actually does grow to like Lily quite a bit and begins to realize honor doesn’t actually mean that much to him and he doesn’t even really like his family. He doesn’t even dislike the concept of the Avatar and thinks the world probably does need one right about now.
So after a whole bunch of chasing them around the globe, thinking about his family, and being forced to almost kill the Avatar now and then he eventually defects and volunteers himself as fire bending instructor.
This is met with suspicion on all sides but he and Lily are bros so he wins.
Avatar Roku
Needing to pick up air bending, Lily probably fakes it until she makes it for a while, but eventually runs into Avatar Roku’s wandering spirit taking vacation from an ice cube.
He’s alarmed, but Aang’s trapped in ice, so if someone’s going to substitute then great.
To everyone else it just looks like Lily’s constantly talking to herself, playing Pai Sho with herself, and miraculously picks up air bending out of absolutely nowhere.
Also anyone close to Lee probably figures out she’s not really human/the avatar at this point, but they’ll take what they can get.
And This All Results In
Lily learns all the elements, there’s probably some big battle, then Lily gives some ridiculous speech about world peace that has nothing to do with anything and while the Fire Nation is defeated, Tom is not in fact made Fire Lord and remains merely the Avatar’s humble water bending instructor.
Instead, if he’s alive at this point, the crown goes to Iroh and he’s given a council of angry Earth Kingdom people who tell him to behave or else. We can give Iroh niceish things sometimes. That, or, hilariously, Obito becomes hokage/Fire Lord being distantly in line for the throne and doesn’t even know how that happened or what his life even is right now.
The colonies are the same mess in canon so something like Republic City probably eventually comes about.
Still, there’s peace, and probably statues to the gang all over the Earth Kingdom and Water Tribes (while the Fire Nation grumbles and remembers the good old days when they controlled the world). 
And then Aang eventually wakes up extremely confused and confronts Avatar Lily noting, “Hey, I’m the actual Avatar” and Lily after a suspiciously blank pause explains, “I said an Avatar, never said I was the Avatar”
So, that’s that. If anyone wants other specific characters added into this mess feel free to comment. 
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trashcankitty12 · 4 years ago
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Layla Headcanons:
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Everyone, meet Princess Layla Poole of Andros. 
She’s the best surfer this side of the Magical Dimension and an excellent escape artist. (Do you have any idea how hard it is to escape from a castle to go out and just breathe without someone watching over you? It’s pretty freaking hard.)
Layla’s probably one of the few voices of reason within the Winx group, and one of the more mature ones. 
(All headcanons relate to my main “Balance/Company of Light” verse and my “Left” verse.)
-Believe it or not, Layla can breathe for a set amount of time underwater/hold her breath for long periods of time. She is sort of half-merperson after all. (Her father, Teredor, is what they call a ‘land-walker’ merperson. He mastered the spell that the merpeople can use to turn their tails into feet. He was actually next in line for the MerKingdom’s throne, but he fell in love with Niobe and managed to leave his own throne for his younger brother Neptune and take to the ‘land throne’ with Niobe.)
-Layla’s body can actually form scales if she’s in the water for a long enough period of time. (Like how most people start getting pruney-like when in the water? Layla starts to scale. Hers are a lovely seafoam color and shine brighter than Stella’s favorite necklace.)
-Growing up, she was close to her cousins. Nereus and Tritannus acted like her older brothers and taught her so much about the underwater world as well as life in general. And she and Tressa were practically sisters. (This changed after they all became teenagers, especially when it started becoming apparent that Tritannus and his father were falling out.)
-Layla wasn’t always so sheltered. She used to be able to go on trips with her parents to other realms and used to be allowed to explore around the MerKingdom with her cousins without any repercussions.
-That changed after Layla turned 7. Rumors of remaining Coven members being spotted around Andros made her parents wary and then there was an attempted kidnapping of Layla by a group of sirens who had been known to work closely with Tharma happened
 After that, Layla became a bit of a prisoner in her own home because her parents were so afraid of something happening to her.
-Layla was early to get her powers (5), and early to gain her first fairy form (12). Niobe and her most trusted court members took to training her in her fairy magic, wanting her to be able to believe in her own abilities as a fairy. (And hope it would translate into her abilities as a princess and a queen.)
-When she was younger, Layla used to ask for a younger sibling. Her parents had to explain that it was hard enough for them to have her, that they were afraid of risking trying to have another. (Even land-walkers and ‘humans’ have issues with fertility. Layla had been such a blessing to them, their last attempt to have a “natural” child.)
-Layla has already had her Princess Ball, but it was vastly different from Stella’s. She had little-to-no say in what happened as her parents were going for a strictly traditional Androsian Ball. The only upside was her cake and that Tressa was there with her.
-Anne was her first friend after she’d been put into ‘lockdown’ by her parents. (And was sort of her first crush. But it’s nice knowing they’ll be close again after Anne married Nabu’s older sister.)
-Layla’s favorite activity/sport may be dancing, but she has many others she’s in love with. Swimming. Water polo. Surfing. Tide Bombing. Androsian Wave Skiing. Water Races. Synchronized Swimming. (Basically, she loves all the water sports. And is pretty decent at them, if she does say so herself.)
-She’s currently really into a few Earth sports right now too. Tennis, volleyball, and MMA.
-She’s also working on her leaf surfing skills and her abilities as a swordswoman. (She’s great at the agility part and keeping on her toes, but she still needs to work on her timing when attacking and trying to defend herself.)
-Layla discovered the pixies and befriended them before her lockdown happened. She’d been with her parents in Magix. They had been on an important meeting with the Council and she was supposed to be with her nanny/Fairy Godmother. But Layla wanted adventure and snuck off into the forest. She ended up running into Queen Ninfea and finding Pixie Village. (And meeting Piff.) Needless to say, she made friends for life.
-And Layla knew when the pixies went missing. She could feel something deep inside of her was wrong when she couldn’t connect to Piff and hadn’t heard from Chatta or Tune in a few days. (The pixies had been allowed to visit with her and write to her after her mother’s own pixie, Ariella, vouched that they were real pixies from Pixie Village and not some sort of imposters.)
-Anyway, Layla did what she usually did to escape from the Androsian Palace, leaving when the guards changed shifts and while her parents were busy holding court. From there she managed to get to Pixie Village and talk Ninfea into helping her create a teleportation spell into ShadowHaunt. (We all know what happened after.)
-Layla and her parents had a very long and awkward conversation after Layla woke up in good condition at Alfea. They had been so worried and had been so relieved that Faragonda had been the one to find and house their daughter
 But after hearing what she’d gone through and how she managed to do so much and still survive
 It made them realize that Layla is growing up and that she is a powerful and capable fairy. (Which is how she managed to convince them to let her stay at Alfea, though it didn’t hurt that she mentioned who her new friends were and who her friends’ parents were/are.)
-(Layla still has nightmares regarding ShadowHaunt and the pixies, but after the realm was returned to its true nature, the nightmares started dying down
 Until Nabu almost died that is.)
-She used to be so against marriage because she knew about the whole ‘arranged marriage’ ideas her realm had. And when her parents tried to force her into one, it really struck a nerve because of the hypocrisy. After all, they chose their own partners, why couldn’t she?! (Which prompted another conversation with her parents. One that required both parties to open their minds and hearts.)
-(Thankfully, she and Nabu did end up choosing each other
 Though she wishes her dad didn’t get along so well with Nabu and that her mother didn’t try to show him baby pictures of her. Honestly, the audacity of her parents.)
-Layla may like seafood (because seafood is a staple of Androsian society), but after being with the other Winx girls, she’s found she really loves the varieties of veggie meals from Linphea. Especially the wraps. (She threatened to marry Flora when the other girl introduced them to her. She was so in love.)
-She and Musa love to jam out together (especially since Layla got her drum set). They actually sound really lovely together and it gets even better when they can talk Tecna into joining in with her keyboard.
-Layla absolutely loves to ride the Sea Hodeaas her uncle Neptune and aunt Ligea have stabled up. It’s the best way to travel underwater and the animals are so majestic. (And yes, they are a breed of seahorse, but a seahorse mixed with those sea dragon things on earth. Just imagine that merger and imagine them to be the equivalent size of a normal horse. Just underwater.)
-No. Layla cannot talk to sea creatures. Not without a spell in place. Please stop asking. (Dammit if you want to talk to animals, Roxy is right fucking there.)
-Layla isn’t thin either. She’s muscular. And she looks fabulous in ballgowns. Eat shit haters.
-If Stella is the snacker of the group, Layla is the one always reminding people to stay hydrated and has like ten water bottles on her at any given time.
-Layla is the friend that if you wanna go do something potentially stupid just to see if you can do it, she’d be down for it. (Granted, she’ll tell you all the ways this could probably go wrong and you all end up dead, but she’s all for seeing what her body can handle. No, she’s not a masochist. She’s just curious.)
-She can sing. But she doesn’t do it often because if she hits a certain pitch, it could be almost
 Hypnotic
 (Which isn’t fun to explain.)
-Layla may wear heels to formal events, but she’d rather wear her sneakers or flip-flops any day of the week. Seriously, please just let her wear her comfy shit.
-We all know Layla is competitive in sports
 She’s also competitive in video games and in board games. (The other girls have a constantly updating list of games Layla and Tecna are no longer allowed to play together.)
-Layla was the most excited about their Earth adventure to find Roxy. It gave her an excuse to be away from Andros for a bit and just be her. (That summer had been a bit, intense. As the Crown Princess and an adult, her parents had been bringing her in more and more on the business aspect of being a Princess.)
-(She loves her crown and her title, and she loves her people and her world
 But sometimes it seems like an overwhelming job to be queen and she’s so terrified of doing something wrong that will endanger everyone she cares about or that she’ll end up accidentally offending an important socialite/delegate/ambassador.)
-Stella is good at the people-aspect of being a princess, so she’s been great at helping Layla get over her nerves on the subject and how to be herself while still being princess. And Layla has helped Stella better understand the more political/tactical portions of being a princess. (And together they’ve helped Bloom become more okay with being a princess.)
-Layla has her major fear of being alone and of failure (which we’ve seen when she gained her Charmix), but she has a few minor things
 Like she’s a bit claustrophobic thanks to her time in ‘lockdown’ and she has a thing about being late to important events. She’s also working on her public speaking issues
 It’s a work in progress.
-Her favorite classes in Alfea involved flying and physical education. Flying always made her feel free and graceful, and almost as powerful as if she were underwater. And the physical classes helped her get rid of her nearly endless energy.
-Layla is a bit hot-headed for an Androsian (who are known for being cool and go-with-the-flow), but she just feels things so deeply and it rocks her to core. (Part of it may be due to the pressures of being a princess and having to try and always do and say the right thing, part of it may be due to being watched so carefully as a child, but she just can’t let things go sometimes and rather than nurse a grudge, she’d rather just have it out and be done.)
-Her goal is to be a great queen when her time to rule comes. But she doesn’t want to necessarily be queen like her mother who tended to rule out of fear. (Layla gets why, she does. She’s met members of the Coven and knows why her mother and father were terrified, but she refuses to be someone who lets it make all of her decisions.) She’ll listen to her fears, sure, and try to rule accordingly, but she doesn’t ever want it to hinder her from making great decisions about Andros or her future children. (If she has any. She and Nabu are still trying to figure out if they want them or if they’d rather wait awhile and adopt.)
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rosewcterdrunk · 3 years ago
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(finn cole, cis-male, he/him) the city of gods is proud to welcome icarus. he appears to be twenty-four years old and is the son of a master craftsman from greek mythology. icarus can be found working as a tattoo artist at daedalus studio and is undaunted about the death of zeus. (written by danii, twenty-two, she/her, est.)
CHARACTER BASICS
NAME: Icarus 
AGE: Twenty-Four
GENDER & PRONOUNS: Cismale, He/Him
FACE CLAIM: Finn Cole
EYE COLOR: Blue
HAIR COLOR: Brown
HEIGHT: 5â€Č9″
DATE OF BIRTH: December 28th
ZODIAC SIGN: Capricorn
LEVEL OF EDUCATION: High School Diploma Equivalent
OCCUPATION: Tattoo Artist at Daedalus Studio
CHARACTER HISTORY
Icarus never knew his mother, though his father had never given him the opportunity to mourn her absence in comparison to the other children he grew up around. Daedalus always kept him busy, putting him to work in his tattoo shop by sitting him down between the buzzing noise and his own sketches to color when he had no one to watch him. For a long time, Daedalus’ shop suffered until it was privatized by Midas Industries, turning the shop into a factory for the one of a kind tattoo machines he had created among other body modification techniques he had tinkered with. Daedalus was hired for more work, going beyond his speciality. It was Icarus who was his test subject for all of the inventions he wanted to propose to Midas Industries. Icarus helped him with so many of his inventions and they tried to rebrand their shop. He had pushed his father to do more, to go out on his own, but it was to no avail. Eventually they dealt things outside of Daedalus’ contract, and in order to hide their newfound fortune, he created a labyrinth of paperwork and more importantly a system underground that hid all of their inventions, failures and successes. 
However, his father had crafted Icarus’ fall instead. While they thrived as a duo, it would backfire. One of their inventions caused an accident that had nearly taken Icarus’ life, leaving him bedridden for over a year. He suffered severe burns on his back from a pair of wings meant to fly that melted, and shattered bones that took a long time to recover. Icarus had just returned from the shadows after his rehabilitation outside of Crete, with knowledge of the world beyond it and he misses it. At some point, he was presumed dead with how long his recovery took. Now, he works at his father’s shop again where it’s lost it’s sponsorship and is slowly returning to an adequate source of income with Icarus’ help, whether it be by his business skills or those booking simply to gawk at his return. 
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aforrestofstuff · 5 years ago
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What do you think the OPM characters' guilty pleasures would be? I feel like Tatsu loves soap operas and Atomic Samurai secretly loves a really popular boy band, like SMAP
Thanks for your request, anon! Sorry this took me so long to get to, you were buried in my inbox lol. But I hope this was worth the wait because oh boy this required all 3 of my brain cells.
Tornado of Terror: As you said, soap operas. She also loves candy apples in canon. But...she also is a HUGE fan of those really cheesy Cosmopolitan magazines that have all of the personality quizzes and the “which hot male celeb would date you” scenarios. She doesn’t fall for it one bit. In fact, she hate reads those fuckers in the same way that people pay to go see bad movies. It’s fun.
Silverfang: Yoga and following along to some cheesy-ass 80s workout videos. I’ve said he likes yoga in a previous headcanon, but he also likes to exercise along to some obnoxious 80s pop while some dude in a leotard instructs him on what to do from a TV screen. He wears sweatbands and legwarmers, too. The whole shebang. He only does it when he’s alone, though. Sometimes he’ll try to teach yoga to his disciples as a way to help them decompress after a long training session, but his workout tapes are his best-kept secret.
Atomic Samurai: I don’t know what a SMAP is, but he’s definitely got some questionable music choices going on considering he’s... well, the way that he is. I’d say he likes to listen to old country, like Marty Robbins and Glen Campbell. It’s really funny because you’ve got this intimidating man from Japan (or a fictional universe basically set in Japan) with a badass katana and shit but inside that empty head of his, there’s just a faint “out in the west Texas town of El Paso....”
Child Emperor: Picking at scabs. He’s often on his knees fixing shit in his lab, and he probably gets burned all the damn time from playing around with lasers so he’s undoubtedly always has a wound healing somewhere. Whenever he’s working on something, he’ll just absentmindedly pick at his scabs. It’s a bad habit and he knows it, but nothing beats the feeling of peeling off an entire patch of that shit. So satisfying.
Metal Knight: Buying books. He doesn’t even read them. He just buys bigass novels with smart-sounding names to fill up his library because he thinks it’ll make his dick grow another three inches or some shit. One of the few things he likes in this world (besides homicide) is the smell of a new book. If he’s feeling particularly pissy, he’ll go into his library and just ssssssnnnnnnnnnniififfffffffffff. He spends an outrageous amount of money on it. If he has anyone over (which is unlikely, but hypothetically speaking) and they mention his library by asking something like “have you read all of these?” It’ll be one of the few times in his life that he’ll feel shame.
King: Reading and writing fanfiction based on his favorite video game/anime series. Nobody knows he does this except his small following online, of course. And even more so, nobody online knows he’s an ultra-popular S-Class hero who’s friends with the most powerful man on earth. He’s actually a pretty decent writer, he just doesn’t take himself too seriously so the plotline to his stories tend to get a little haywire and overly self-indulgent. Let him have his fun. He just wants to be a Sailor Scout.
Zombieman: Singing. He actually used to be a good singer (he sounded like a discount Steve Perry back in the day), but constant smoking really fucked up his voice. He might as well have lungs the size of grapes because he can’t carry a note for more than 2 seconds without wheezing like an accordion with asthma. He’s never sang in front of anyone before because he thinks it’s silly thing that isn’t worth showing off. Play anything from The Eagles though, and he’ll have a hard time resisting.
Drive Knight: He likes to open up panels in his arms and legs to play with the wires (basically a robot’s version of nerve endings, I’m assuming) just so he can feel something. It’s kind of sad because he doesn’t experience pain or the cold or being tickled... (I know what y’all are thinking and you’d better STOP). So he sometimes takes it upon himself to dick around with his insides and dip his toe into what it feels like to be human, even if it’s just for a little bit. He’s super secretive about it (he’s just secretive about everything, really) because he doesn’t want anyone to know that he desires something outside of being a weapon of mass destruction justice.
Pig God: His whole schtick is basically indulging in a guilty pleasure — pigging out on delicious food with no regard whatsoever for one’s overall health. Other than that, however, he does like to collect body pillows. There, I said it. All he fucking does is eat and he’s too much of a big boi to be going out 24/7, so he’s gotta be on the internet/watching anime/playing video games/reading manga during all of that downtime between his stints of doing hero work. His bed is fucking ginormous to handle all of that big boy-ness and on it, he has his body pillow nest. He rests on a throne made for kings. A true icon.
Superalloy Darkshine: Also working out along to some cheesy 80s exercise videos. His hero outfit was inspired from what those ravishing instructors would wear on the television. Well, it was supposed to be a full leotard but it ripped every time he flexed just a tiny bit so the speedo is the only thing that’s left. He’s gotta hella rhythm and keeps up with the music using little to no effort. Although, he can’t go too hard because he’s also a big boi and he’ll literally shake the entire building if he gets too turnt up. Dance muscle boy, dance.
Watchdog Man: Eating too many dog treats lol. Sometimes while he’s stationed on his little podium thing, visitors will leave him little offerings like dog treats and other miscellaneous food items/toys. He never takes them or eats them in front of people, but he often brings everything home with him after a long day just to gobble that shit up. He’s gained a little weight since he started doing it but you can’t even notice it because his suit is hella bulky. Some of it is due in part to stress-eating because being a dog and dude at the same time is hectic, but it’s honest work.
Flashy Flash: Racing shit. Whenever he’s on his travels during, say, assassination missions or hero work, he gets hella bored really quickly. So, to help with this, he’ll often race birds or planes flying in the sky on his way to his destination to see who’s quicker (it’s always him). Sometimes he’ll even play catch with himself by throwing a pine cone or something and running to the place he guesses it’ll land before it even touches the ground. He just does a ton of weird speedster shit whenever he’s bored and he’ll deny it if anyone asks.
Genos: Purposefully putting a little bit too much oil on his joints after each upgrade so he’ll be as slick as a salamander. It’s a really funny feeling to be able to move your limbs with little to no resistance without having to worry about popping or breaking anything. It just makes him feel so agile despite being like, a hunk of actual metal. If he wasn’t so uptight, he would loosen the screws in his fingers to he can bend them almost all the way back (he’s actually thought about it a few times), but both Dr. Kuseno and his 3 remaining braincells attested to that. He just likes to tinker around with his body and see what weird shit he can do. It’s a bad habit because it’s led to a few things being broken on multiple occasions.
Metal Bat: Zenko’s shitty pop music. Whenever he drops her off at school or piano practice, he’ll immediately go home and blast that shit on full volume (because he’s practically deaf from always jumping out of falling buildings and continuously blasting music in his earbuds) while doing chores and the like. He’s one of those people that HAVE to have something going on in the background as they’re getting shit done. He’d rather be caught dead than listening to the OPM equivalent of Taylor Swift because he knows Zenko would never let him live it down.
Tanktop Master: Wearing suits around the house when he’s not even going anywhere. He’s got to wear his tanktop 24/7 whenever he’s in public to keep up The Image (which he has no problem with, he genuinely loves the tanktop ideology) but he also needs to feel fancy every once and a while. So, if he happens to have the time while in between appearances, he’ll prance around in a suit tailored just for him. Because he’s so fucking huge that he had to pay someone a large sum to custom make an outfit that actually fits. He is 7-motherfucking-feet tall. 7.
Puri-Puri Prisoner: Making Valentine’s Day cards all times of the year. Listen, it gets boring as hell in prison. Sometimes the guards will let all of the inmates have a little glitter and glue to keep themselves busy because no harm can come of a little arts and crafts, right? He likes to make cards on the daily just to let all of his lovers know how much he appreciates them. If they express even the slightest amount of disdain for his creations, he’ll spent the next week crying in the darkest corner of his cell block. He also likes origami. Origami is huge in prison because it’s hella time-consuming and guaranteed to calm a busy mind. His favorite things to make are little unicorns.
Amai Mask: Bath bombs. There have been several mishaps in which he’s used a poorly-made bath bomb and came out of the tub looking like Shrek but he’s grown and lot since then, okay? After a long day or a particularly stressful concert, he’ll sink into some hot water and drop a ball of lavender-scented goodness in there. It’s become a bit of an addiction because he’s got multiple cabinets dedicated solely to his collection, but at least he always smells divine.
Iaian: Shakespearean dramas. Kama got him hooked on theater shit and he’s since ripped through all of the most well-known plays. He thinks in iambic pentameter. It wasn’t always noticeable since he’s a quiet, well-reserved guy but his fellow disciples and Kami have recently noticed that he’s developed a bit of a dramatic flair. Even worse, he’s started calling himself a knight whenever he puts on his armor. Everyone prays it’s just a phase but seeing as how stubborn Iaian is, that seeks highly unlikely. Kami is dying inside because he can’t handle another drama nerd.
Okamaitachi: Soap operas, like Tatsumaki. Kama is the most dramatic out of all of the disciples so it’s only natural that she’d like the most dramatic genre of any show out there. She doesn’t exactly watch them religiously though. She’s the type of viewer to drop off the face of the earth for three seasons and come back without knowing what the fuck is going on (because the disciples have limited access to cable due to Kami’s dumbassery and ignorance to anything technology-related), but still cry during the finale anyway because oh no these people are so hot and one of them is deaaaaaad and the other one is that person’s long-lost sister....
Bushidrill: Taking alcohol from Atomic Samurai’s stash every so often. Bushidrill knows what the good shit is and he could buy it himself if he wanted to, but why would he when there’s a perfectly good alcoholic to steal from living right down the hall? He only takes in small doses because, believe it or not—he’s smart, but Kami isn’t gonna notice regardless of whether or not Bushi takes 1 or 5 bottles at a time because the old shit couldn’t spot a purple raccoon if it was 3 feet in front of him. There have been times where Bushi has opened bottles of Kami’s alcohol right in front of him just to play God and he always, without missing a beat, says “Oh, we have the same taste. How neat.”
Fubuki: I’ve said this before in a previous headcanon, but she has a mild obsession with Victorian aesthetic. She’s got a small collection of semi-authentic ballgowns that cost upwards of a-fuckton-of-money each, but anything’s worth it to be able to play dress-up with Lily. Fubuki’s favorite thing is making Lily feel beautiful because everyone has been an insecure teenager at one point and she knows how it feels to not be comfortable in one’s own skin. This isn’t exactly a guilty pleasure because she’s not guilty about it, but it’s almost gotten to a point where an intervention is needed. She’s got so many damn dresses and sooooo much fine china....
Saitama: Retail therapy, lol. Saitama is only good at budgeting because he has no choice given how fucking poor he is, but give this boy even a little bit of leeway and he’ll buy the ugliest clothes (to which he thinks look poppin’) and the best meats without even batting an eye. His entire manga collection is the product of him having little to no self control the moment he realizes he’s got a bit of money to spend on himself. This is also the only time he’ll experiment with cooking because now he can actually afford to fuck up, literally.
Mumen Rider: Sweets! I’ve said this in a previous hc but he has a major sweet tooth. You can substitute salt for sugar in any given recipe and he’ll see it as a major improvement because he just goes absolutely buckwild for anything sweet. His pancreas is suffering, but he believes nothing feels better than curling up under the covers on a rainy day with a heaping helping of milk chocolate. The only thing that makes him feel better after getting beat to shit is a kiss on the cheek and box of his favorite cookies (and some bananas, lol).
Sonic: Like Flash, he also likes racing things. But, in addition to that, his guilty pleasure is doing his own hair in elaborate hairstyles (when it was longer). He’s pretty much homeless so he’s got a lot of time to himself in between murders. This is when you can find him sitting in the woods somewhere braiding flowers into his hair and tying it off with a moss ribbon. He’d never admit he does this because he’s a big macho man and he’d probably cry.
Garou: Spicy chips. I’ve said this before in a previous hc, but he absolutely inhales his food without even tasting it half the time so it’s not even like he gets to enjoy the flavor that much. He just likes the burn because he’s a shithead. He also doesn’t fear death or a torn-up asshole, so he’ll eat an entire family-sized bag of the OPM-universe equivalent to Takis without even batting an eye. He’s been beat to shit so many times that the agony that comes with downing so much spice is lost on him. He doesn’t even need water. It’s insane. Someone stop this madman at once.
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atamascolily · 4 years ago
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lily watches fma:b, eps. 58-61
I hate suspense, so I went ahead and read the plot summary for the next few episodes, so I could relax a bit. Unfortunately, there's a lot of plot decisions that elicit a major "WTF?" from me, so we'll see if they work better in context.
so they're using the Gates as transportation portals now?? This is new, isn't it?? or does it only work with people who have already opened gates?? I'm so confused!!
okay, so ling doesn't know how to use alchemy to heal people? but he can sense homunculi because chi? or is this just something everyone in Xing can do? I'M SO CONFUSED.
[he has a stone but neither he nor Greed know how to use it to heal others, I guess?? why not, though?]
Bucaneer calls Olivier a "queen," which is right on!
Greedling is the best thing about this adaptation, full stop
*sings* "It must be nice, must be nice, to have a homunculus on your side..."
that one random woman looks so much like Danta from FMA03 that I just had to shake myself to make sure I wasn't imagining it
Elicia HAS ECLIPSE GLASSES AND IT'S THE CUTEST THING
I don't understand why Hoheneheim counts as a sacrifice - yes, he was present for the opening in Xerxes, but he did not attempt human transmutation himself (even though the portal was centered around him without his knowledge) I feel like intent matters?? iirc, he wasn't consumed and broken down the way Ed and Al were???
He's also now fused with Father in a weird blob that reminds me of Topaz trapping humans in Steven Universe.
I don't know why Hawkeye hasn't managed to shoot the evil doctor in all this close-quarters fighting. And why isn't Roy using flames? We had a demo earlier with the zombies that he can work around his allies without burning them, so... ???
Mustang is ordered to perform human transmutation so the bad guys can have a fifth person to complete their circle (somehow, alchemy always works in fives?) He refuses, but then they say they'll shoot Hawkeye if he doesn't so he caves.
this "gotta get a complete set" seems really sloppy for Team Bad, because the eclipse is like, any minute now. Seems like they're cutting it really close. You think they could have found/persuaded/forced someone into doing it, given how long they've had to work at this. So I'm just like "???" about this.
(the doctor dude also lampshades this, lol)
also, I'm so confused why the doctor claims Roy can bring anyone he wants back - maybe this was FMA03 I'm thinking of, but it seems like you would need some sort of specific connection to a particularl person in order to bring them back that you couldn't just whip out at a moment's notice??
is there any other way to open the gateway besides human transmutation?? And why doesn't the doctor count, since they've made plenty of philosopher's stones (which involve human transmutation, and is why Hohenheim is a sacrifice in the first place)??
okay, hawkeye isn't dead yet, but he's supposed to transmute her anyway? How does that differ from healing? I'M SO CONFUSED.
anyway, pride shows up and eats the annoying doctor and also makes a transmutation circle with his shadows while Bradley pins Mustang to the floor. o...kay. andthen it just...happens?without roy's consent?
WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK DUDES
okay, andnow the eclipse is starting, irl they'd have a maximum of 8 minutes at totality to Do The Thing, but who the fuck knows what's happening here since all the characters are UNDERGROUND (how do they even KNOW)
fuck, they're basically raping mustang here since his consent does not matter because pride ate the doctor and the doctor has the knowledge (but that should make him and/or pride the sacrifice, not ROY).
like what the actual fuck
so the doctor gets transmuted, even though he was the one with the relevant knowledge?? I don't get it.
and mustang is automatically transported to be with the other sacrifices - why? how?? how does this even work? is that other circlethey wereusing still active? was it part of pride's set-up for this circle to be dual-purpose?HOW IS THIS POSSIBLE?
and apparently, it's just one floor below so all they have to do is break the floor??
Roy is blind... but does not physically lose his eyes, which makes NO SENSE, given that Al, Ed and Izumi lost actual physical pieces of themselves.THE FUCK.
ed's like, "this is super fucked up shit, and you don't get to moralize about human nature and hubris if you guys forced him to do this"
pride is basically acting like a kid who had all the time in the world for an assignment and then rushed to complete it at the last possible moment
scar fights bradley, yes FINALLY SOMEBODY KILL THAT DUDE
al's emaciated body is just so heartbreaking, and al's like "no! I can't suddenly move to this incredibly emaciated version of myself before the final battle!" which is actually really smart of him
of course, al's body waits until AFTER his soul leaves to monologue about how al might have just destroyed the entire world. GEE THANKS YOU ASSHOLE.
broussh shows up at the radio station and maria ross is like :????:
Father says the sacrifices are "all in his belly" and we cut to the chimeras on the outside looking at a massive blob - so Father is ALSO a gate???
(ngl: it would make TOTAL SENSE if Father was originally one of the creatures we see when the gate opens, who got pulled into our world by Hohenheim's master... especially since he used Hohenheim's blood? DID HIS MASTER PERFORM HUMAN TRANSMUTATION? WOULDN'T IT BE AWESOME IF WE ACTUALLY GOT SOME ANSWERS??)
(okay, this is my working headcanon now)
May's like "I'M GONNA TAKE 'EM" and I'm like "aww, heck yeah girl!"
it's really appropriate that Scar--Formerly Consumed by Anger--is fighting Wrath, who ordered the Amestrian equivalent of Order 66 on Ishval.
scar put a reconstruction circle on his other arm, how Symbolic
FATHER MAKES A GUN OUT OF HIS OWN BODY WITH EYES AND TEETH
no seriously, what the fuck did I just witness
Al apologizes to Hohenheim in case he hits him when he attacks father, bless that boy
Izumi makes A GIANT FUCKING CROSSBOW, did I mention I love her?
the personal gates of all of the sacrifices open - so they have giant eyes in their stomachs, wtf
father wants to open.. the planet's gate??
(this ties in with the alkahestry and chi, but... what?)
okay, the country-wide transmutation circle activates and everyone dies
Pinako (who knows Hohenheim is involved with this shit): Hohenheim, I'm gonna slug you. AND DAMN WELL YOU SHOULD MA'AM.
then the gates open and Father challenges God to a fistfight
... and God answers??
[apparently God lives in the sun, and only comes out during an eclipse??? looks just like the usual gate-eye-tentacle creature, tho]
okay, so we get our answer as to why an eclipse: male + female, sun + moon, = perfect being = immortality.
apparently there's a rule that all megalomaniacal shounen villains end up looking the same, because Father looks just like Aizen''s final form from Bleach now, except with more eyes.
Father ate God and now he's young and hot and mostly naked again.
He negates alchemy and creates a miniature sun in his hand because he can.
I hope God gives him indigestion or something.
Oh, wait, Hohenheim had a plan after all... THOUGH APPARENTLY 50 MILLION PEOPLE HAD TO DIE FIRST, WAY TO GO THERE
turns out he's been letting bits of his philosopher stone around amestris on his travels so that father would eat them and they'd tear him apart from the inside
... and the circle for the alchemy is the moon's shadow on the earth.
[I don't know if the astronomy actually works out, but it's very nifty nonetheless]
anyway, everybody's soul returns to their bodies, and everyone wakes up. IDK how their bodies handle having been functionally brain dead, but we're just gonna say it all works out, okay?
ooh, and everyone REMEMBERS WHAT JUST HAPPENED so they’re all like “...the fuck??”
scar saves the world by activating the reverse transmutation circle over the center that all the Ishvalans set up during the time skip
instead of blood you just need circles drawn on paper for reconstruction? why did Team Evil go to so much trouble to murder people instead?
father spends this whole fight looking like a very ripped hohenheim in a bathrobe around his waist OMG
pride calls ed his brother and I think this was handled better in 03 with Envy, but w/e. anyway he's going to take over ed's body but kimblee steps in and stops him
(man, this fucker again!!!)
kimblee's like "lol, I just like being a contrary bitch"
pride is reduced to a little baby, which Ed calls "Selim" and puts on his red jacket... okay...
well that was a trip.
cannot fault the manga-ka for ambition and epic scale here, but also: WHAT DID I JUST WATCH.
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miraculous-ash · 5 years ago
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My thoughts on episode "Ladybug"
-Adrien wanted to make sure that his lucky charm that he made for Marinette was perfect, so perfect that he literally sought the council of his fashion designer father!! -Lila, this bitch, honestly I can't even. But really her watching the class have fun at Marinette's party was pretty funny -Why would stolen test results matter after the test has been passed in? Like on the scale they were treating it with anyway -I'M SO GLAD ADRIEN IS STANDING UP, THANK-YOU -I thought the test thing was already dirty, but the second Lila went to stairs and I knew what was a foot, I screeched. Like this mofo -Honestly we needed the fireman back in here to prove that she wasn't injured again, because obviously the school couldn't. -Tom and Sabine aren't standing for this BS -Okay, so let me get this straight. Lila has A) Framed her for stealing the test results B) Framed/accused her for pushing her down the stairs and now C) FRAMED/ACCUSED HER OF STEALING AS WELL -Marinette really ain't getting any breaks here -NOT TO MENTION ALL THIS IS CONSTANTLY GOING DOWN IN FRONT OF HER FRIENDS -Was a little confused when Hawkmoth showed up here since I know this episode deals with a sentimonster.. BUT OH SHIT WE REAKUMATIZING CATALYST. DAMN. -Alya didn't let the lies get to her this time and believed her friend dodging an akuma -CHLOE PROTECTING SABRINA FROM THE AKUMAS, absolute queen honestly, didn't let the negativity get to her either -But oh SHIT. The other classmates, SABINE, AND MARINETTE?!?!? Damn dawg, poopy is hitting the ceiling hard -The fact that Marinette getting done this dirty is equivalent to season two finale's events with all this reakumatization? I stan -She was legit 50% away from Hawkmoth getting the earrings. Damn. -Again the knowledge of the sentimonster has me ??? but okay, Nathalie is down, this ain't good, but that was close, way too close  -Also, is this the first time we've fully seen Hawkmoth retrieve an akuma? Like 100%? Because I think it wasssss (he always just reuses it, or keeps it close by for reakumatization) -Yes Gabriel, finally being responsible, Jesus, take that broche away from her!! Interesting how he worded what was happening though, what was it? That the damaged miraculous transfers its wounds to the holder? -Tikki berating Marinette from that really big almost -Thank-you Alya, for finally standing by your girl -So wait, they were just gonna straight up put Marinette to working in the bakery full time? Interesting -NATHALIE I SWEAR TO *pterodactyl noise* -I had been wondering for a while there if it was Gabe that was gonna make the sentimonster though, using the peacock himself -This was an interesting creation process for making this amok -Pretty smart plan on Nathalie's part though, not gonna lie, she had poor Chat fooled and was playing him like a fiddle -I loved the old detective film type look to Alya's snooping, nice touch -Marinette trying her gosh darn hardest to leave the bakery, RIP girl, Tom, whyyy my dude -RIP to Chat too honestly, this poor boy's heart, hitting him right where it hurts -Me basically having a heart attack until real Ladybug steps in, I could've believed a reveal happening there if not, since it was just him with senti, even if Mayura saw, it's right before a season finale, I could see a reveal happening here -CHAT BUDDY, THIS IS A BIG OOF MAN, haha how does Ladybug feel about her partner guessing wrong when she guessed right back in Copycat? -Like always though, Marinette and her quick thinking to the rescue -Hahahaha "Senticharm!" *big gun* "Oh yeah? I'll show you a real, Luckycharm!!" *fork* "Yeah, you're definitely the real Ladybug" HAHAHAHA -Me sitting here having a heart attack at an ALMOST MAYURA REVEAL, my heart was already breaking thinking about Chat's reaction!! -ME HAVING AN ABSOLUTE ANYEURISM AT HAWKMOTH ACTUALLY SHOWING UP, MY GOD!!?? -Adrien calling him grandpa, god I'm dead, what's real anymore -Okay, oh shit, just, holy poop, my sweet goly jeepers. Honestly expecting someone to get revealed here right before the season finale, was 100% expecting it to be Mayura (And if so, I don't think Adrien would make the connection to Gabe being Hawkmoth after the events of the Collector, but Ladybug would definitely revisit the thought, but to be honest, Adrien would probably be too crushed to think about it in the moment) -OKAY THEY JUST BOTH YEETED THEM, THAT'S COOL. -Oh Chat, my poor sweet boy -Yes, take the miraculous and DON'T GIVE IT BACK TO HER. Honestly I could see her dying soon at this rate, what a finale that could be -Also, did she just say that she was the reason Hawkmoth was able to discover Master Fu's identity? That's an interesting tidbit -I just realized I don't think I mentioned Duusu yet, well she's precious -LILA, SWEET NIBLETS WHAT IS HAPPENING HERE. -I am HERE for Angry Adrienℱ you tell her boy -This is a very interesting turn on Adrien's part though, he is very much like his father in this scene and that unnerves me greatly.. -My sweet innocent Marinette thinking that Lila has actually changed her ways and want's to be friends after all, but she's smarter than that, we don't need to worry -Gabriel making Lila his new muse/model?? Hoh boy. This is going to be interesting in future episodes I'm sure -Also weird that Nathalie witnessed Adrien confronting Lila at the shoot? Like she nodded to her with the approval to obey Adrien, like WHAT WAS THAT?!  And why is NOBODY talking about it?? -This episode was great for soo many ships, like come water your crops people, we got Adrienette, Ladynoir, and whatever Gabe and Nathalie's ship name is -I really can't wait for the season finale after this build up guys. And honestly, I don't think I'm going to be ready for it. How does one even start to get emotionally prepared for what's to come?? Over all, I really liked the episode. It kept me thoroughly entertained and on the edge of my seat. I'm glad that Marinette got some justice. The animation and direction was beautiful. Very pleased
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eskalations · 4 years ago
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Smoke and Gunpowder, Chapter 5
A/N: Below the “read more” since it’s a bit long!
Summary: Even now, in the privacy of her room and away from the prying eyes of their government, he stiffened at her proximity. The careful lines drawn between the two of them seemed to blur at times like these when they were alone and out of uniform. In the dim light of her room, it was easy to imagine that they were just a quiet country boy and bold city girl again. (ROYAI GENDERBEND AU)
AO3 | FFN
Tumblr: Chapter 1, Chapter 2, Chapter 3, Chapter 4, Chapter 5
Chapter Summary:
There was no way he could be here. The last time she had spoken to him, he had not said a word about joining the military. She had always thought he had wanted to become an engineer or something of that nature. Surely, with his father's notorious distaste for the State Military, the young man would have never considered becoming a part of its ranks – right?
A/N: Another chapter down! I thought it was finally time to introduce Maes Hughes. Most of the dialogue in this chapter has come straight from the manga, since I wanted to keep this AU as much in the realm of canon as possible. The only slight change that has been made is to the timeline. In this AU, Mustang joined the Military Academy in 1905 post-Master Hawkeye's death, while Maes Hughes graduated from the Military Academy in 1906 instead of 1905. Other than that, everything is pretty much the same from the original telling of this. Don't worry about the slight lack of Royai in this chapter, this was mostly used as an opportunity to build up some backstories. We will be returning to Ishval in other chapters, so you WILL get to see more of their time together during the war.
Please let me know what you think! Comments are always welcome!
-
Ishval, East Area - Summer of 1908
"Mustang!"
Over the dull ringing in her ears, the young Major could just make out the sound of someone calling her name. The voice sounded familiar, though she couldn't be sure. Under the burning sun of Ishval, hallucinations were prevalent – and she had had more than her fair share since arriving here.
However, when she glanced back at the group of soldiers huddled around the water trough, she sighed gratefully. Running towards her was a dark-haired man with glasses situated over his sharp, Amestrian features.
"Hughes!" She called from the wash station, her tired voice tinged with relief. Oh, how good it was to see a familiar face amongst this hell. Maes Hughes, as always, had impeccable timing. "So you're here too?"
The man, who was four years her senior, had to stop for a second to catch his breath. Under the heavy wool of their uniforms, any minor exertion of energy suddenly became a marathon of effort. Once his breathing had finally returned to normal – a bright grin broke out on his features. It didn't escape the young woman that the smile didn't reach anywhere near his eyes though.
"Hey it's been awhile Musta – ," Maes paused as the girl reached out to give him their customary fist bump. The overcoat she was wearing over her uniform slipped, giving way to the single star on her shoulder. This caught the man's attention immediately. "Oh! Now you're 'Major Mustang,' aren't you?!"
Raina could tell the words were meant to have a competitive edge, given the man's own lower status – however, she could hear a great amount of pride within them as well. His smile only grew bigger as their fists touched.
After taking her certification to become a State Alchemist, Raina had insisted on being given the opportunity to earn her keep by joining the Military Academy. Though she would be instantly given the title of Major due to the nature of her skills, she still wanted to pay her dues and learn what it was like to be a REAL soldier – one who wasn't just intended to be used as a human weapon. She wanted people to respect her and acknowledge that she had earned any rank she had received by merit rather than chance.
This was more of a challenge than she had expected given her age and gender. Though the State Military did not discriminate between male and female – that didn't mean the lonely cadets of the Academy didn't. She was 16 when she entered the Academy, the Fuhrer himself approving her enrollment and bypassing the normal age requirements, which caused tongues to wag throughout every branch of the military. Her male counterparts in class had ogled her, seeing her as nothing more than a nice thing to look at while they completed basic training.
Hughes had always seen her as the little sister he had never had. After their initial competitive streak in the Academy, the two of them had found that they were a backwards set of kindred spirits. Hughes with his endless optimism and unrivaled wit and Raina with her fiery determination and lofty goals. The pair had become quite the undefeatable duo during their time at the Academy.
Unfortunately, others didn't hold her in as of high regards as Hughes, despite her already promised title upon graduation. In fact, that only seemed to add more fuel to the fire.
During her time at the Academy, the men had constantly whispered about the young and beautiful Flame Alchemist. No matter how many times she tested at the top of her class or received amongst the highest marks in her physicals, her fellow cadets never seemed to take her as seriously as she would have liked. The only one who truly ever saw her as a threat was Hughes himself.
Hughes with all his enthusiasm and desire to be the best had seen the young Mustang for what she was – competition. Never had he focused on the fact that she was a girl, all he saw was a fellow soldier. Thus, began their competitive streak.
Over time, a bond had formed between the two. After having taken her leave of the Hawkeye residence, Raina had begun to miss the constant male presence she had grown used to when she was out east. Though Maes Hughes and Ray Hawkeye were about as different as night and day, it was the steady nature of the two that seemed to bring Raina such unmatched comfort.
While Hughes had graduated long before she had, the bond they shared was one she was never able to replicate in her remaining years at the Academy.
It figures that they would both end up in Ishval. Pretty much everyone was ending up in Ishval.
"To be more precise, it's a position equivalent to a Major," She removed her ignition gloves, waving them in front of him as a reminder. It wasn't like she had to put much effort into gaining her current rank. "Actually, I only have as much authority as a Captain."
While she dipped her hands into the cool water of the wash station, Hughes released a victorious whoop. "Ha, same as me then!"
"You became a Captain? When?" There was genuine curiosity in her tone. Hughes sure had climbed the ranks quickly, even without the help of alchemy. She splashed water in her face, letting it cool her heated skin.
"Just now!" He remarked brightly, handing her a towel. "Out here, people high and low keep dying. If you gain a little credit
"
Raina paused with towel in hand, glancing over at the man to see what had caused him to stop. It was the first time during their conversation that their eyes had met. Hughes looked uneasy.
"You
" The man had to clear his throat before continuing. "You've got a different look in your eyes."
Yes, she supposed she did.
Toweling off the dampness that still lingered on her skin, Raina threw the used towel into a waiting basket. She and Hughes walked off to the side, allowing the soldiers behind them to gain access to the basin. Despite hearing the disappointment in his tone, Raina found it impossible to look away in shame.
"You do, too." She met his gaze head on. "They're killer's eyes."
Hughes smirked, though there was no real humor behind the action. "Yeah."
With that they chose to distance themselves from the camp, knowing that their conversation was about to take a dangerous turn. One could almost say traitorous. If the look in their eyes was any indication, then it certainly didn't seem like either of them was terribly happy about what they had been called to do.
Once the voices of their fellow soldiers were but a mere hum in the distance behind them, they stopped walking. The endless Ishvalan desert went on for miles in front of them. Off in the distant sky, they glimpsed a large plum of smoke, signaling that another Ishvalan town was also under siege.
At the sight, Maes sighed heavily.
"It feels familiar, like it was just a while ago." The man gave another humorless laugh, turning to face his companion. Though his eyes shined with mirth, he couldn't hide the pain that lingered behind them. "Your eyes were sparkling at the Military Academy. We all sure talked about this country's future."
Raina remembered those days quite vividly. Despite her dour mood from earlier, she couldn't fight back the smirk that appeared on her features. "Yeah, we sure did."
Hughes hadn't been the only one she had shared her vision for the future with. It was one of the last things she had ever spoken to Master Hawkeye about. Oh, how he would be disappointed in her now. The exact worries he had for his flame alchemy had come to fruition and there was very little she could say to defend herself.
"How funny it is to think about that beautiful future now."
"Raina, you know this stuff wasn't a part of that beautiful future." Hughes rarely used her first name. He had always made sure to address her just as he would any other man in the field – to validate the respect he felt towards her. However, at the sight of her guilty countenance, he chose to throw that out the window. "This wasn't what any of us imagined."
They walked a few steps, passing by a gaggle of dead Ishvalans already covered in sand. Neither reacted to the sight.
"How's life here?" The Captain asked casually, stepping over some rubble as they made their way further from the camp. "I haven't seen you since I graduated."
They continued in that vein, discussing what they had seen since being called out to the field. It seemed much the same – gunfire and blasts. The only objective at this point was complete annihilation of the Ishvallan race, plain and simple. They knew of nothing else. Every morning was the same.
"Lieutenant! Lieutenant Hughes!" They paused their chat as a fresh-faced cadet ran to where they stood. The young man was puffing by the time he caught up to them. There was a letter in his hand.
"It's Captain," Hughes grumbled as he turned to receive the young cadet.
"Oh! Excuse me!" The soldier raised his hand to salute his superior, apology evident in his tone. "It's a letter!"
The man handed it over to him before taking his leave – catching wind that this was very much a private conversation. Hughes turned the envelope over in his hands to read who the sender was. The exclamation that escaped him had Raina jumping in surprise.
"Oh!"
"What is it?!" Raina asked, one hand clutching at her heart. You just couldn't scare soldiers like that. Hughes was unperturbed by her reaction, too busy rubbing the parchment against his cheek.
"It's MY beautiful future!" He held up the envelope for her to read. Raina had to squint to read the tiny cursive.
"Gracia? You've got yourself a woman?"
"She's in Central!" The man brought the envelope to his chest, raising one fist in an impassioned fashion. "She's been waiting for my return all this time."
Raina snorted at the display, hardly able to believe this man was the same one that was a killer on the battlefield.
Noticing her less than stellar response, Hughes smirked. There was a playful glint in his eyes. "What are you disappointed that I'm no longer on the market?"
Raina gave him a wry grin. "Not at all, I'm happy for you."
During their time at the Academy, their relationship had been brought to question many times by their fellow cadets. Since most of the boys spent their time shamelessly flirting with the young girl, they had a hard time imagining that any man would try and befriend her. To them, the entire friendship had to be a cover up for some kind of sordid affair.
But their accusations simply weren't valid. If anything, Hughes had become a surrogate big brother to her in the Academy. He was constantly helping shield her from unwanted advances, although he knew she could handle herself just fine. She had been offended for a while at his behavior, until she realized this was just a part of him. He was protective of those he loved.
By graduation, their supposed romantic relationship had become somewhat of a joke between the two of them.
Hughes gave her an appreciative smile – however, it soon slipped from its place, replaced by one of sheer anxiety. Under the hot, midday sun, Hughes went white as a sheet.
"It just occurred to me – what'll I do if some other guy is making a pass at her?!" Raina opened her mouth to calm him fears, but Hughes ignored her – continuing to mutter near incoherently. "No there's no way that Gracia would leave a great guy like me to have an affair."
"Hughes – "
"No no no!"
"Hughes, I don't think – "
"But there's still no way the guys around her would leave such a great woman alone!" The man grabbed his face in a dramatic fashion, his turmoil evident in the fearful expression on his face. Raina was not amused by the display.
"Hey!" The frustrated shout stopped the man's ranting. He turned to where his friend stood with an annoyed look. "Hughes, I'll give you one word of advice."
The Captain raised a single brow, curious as to what his companion had to say.
"It's a common pattern in movies and novels. Guys who talk happily of their families or lovers on the battlefield?" Hughes nodded, hanging on every word. That was until Raina made a pistol with her fingers and pretended to shoot. "Have a higher chance of dying."
"Not funny, Mustang."
"It's true! How can you talk about such things out here?" She pointed an accusatory finger to his chest, her expression hard. "How can you talk about that when you're out here killing?"
"What are you saying you don't have ANYTHING light hearted to talk about?" Hughes countered, hands on his hips.
As their squabble continued, both failed to noticed the sound of sand shuffling behind them. One of the Ishvalan men that they had passed, whom they had assumed to be dead, had risen from the rubble, knife in hand. He raised it high above their heads before either of them took notice of his presence.
Once Raina realized that a shadow was descending upon them, she turned to face the threat head on. Hughes had already pulled out one of his own blades, but the girl was completely defenseless with her gloves still stuck in her pocket.
Before the man could plunge the knife forward - a shot rang out.
Both soldiers stood in shock as their attacker crumpled to the ground – blood pouring heavily from a fatal wound to the head. The red liquid stained the sand at their feet, running under the thick rubber soles of their boots. Neither said a word as they silently stared at the scene in front of them.
Regaining her senses, Raina quickly pulled out her gloves, sliding them in place over her fingers. "A shot?"
The girl's eyes were scanning the area for any potential threat that could still exist, when Hughes reached out to put a comforting hand on her shoulder, blade already back in his pocket.
"It's okay." He assured her, his eyes glued on the sniper tower that lay in the distance. "We have a 'Hawk's Eye' on us out here."
Raina fought the urge to jolt at the name, her heart beating a million miles a minute. "Hawk
?"
There was no way he could be here. The last time she had spoken to him, he had not said a word about joining the military. She had always thought he had wanted to become an engineer or something of that nature. Surely, with his father's notorious distaste for the State Military, the young man would have never considered becoming a part of its ranks – right?
Not noticing her distress, Hughes continued. "Yeah, it's a still nameless sniper. It's become quite a topic among us. He's still a cadet in the Military Academy, but at any rate, he's got a good arm. It seems they brought him all the way out here because of our dismal numbers."
His companion nodded in acknowledgement, though she could barely hear him over the roaring in her ears.
"To think they had to pull out a fresh recruit like that." Hughes shook his head in disbelief, a heavy sigh leaving his lips. "This must be the end."
Raina's eyes never left the tower, even as they began to walk back into camp.
Could it really be
?
-
As night fell over Ishval, the distant sound of explosions and gunfire lowered to a buzz. Soldiers milled about campfires, swapping stories over meagre rations while they passed around bottles of liquor. One would never know that most of the men, who were drunkenly singing bar songs off-key and swaying with their arms around each other, were cold-blooded killers.
Raina had stuck by Hughes' side for most of the day, catching up on events that had transpired since they had last saw the other. At this point – she knew Gracia's favorite flower, her favorite position, her blood type, and many other details about the woman that she would have rather remained a mystery. However, she had way too much on her mind to really be too frustrated with Hughes' seemingly endless prattle.
She was still distracted by her own thoughts when Hughes called out to a group of snipers huddled around the campfire.
"There he is!" Before the Major could say anything more, Hughes called out to a cloaked figure seated by the fire. "Hey! Thanks for before. You were the one that shot that, right?"
"Yes," A deep voice answered from beneath his hood.
Raina's blood ran cold.
The sniper stood to his full height, a single hand raising to remove his head covering. The moment his flaxen blonde hair was revealed, the young soldier knew exactly who their savior was.
Ray Hawkeye was in Ishval.
His familiar features were hard against the dancing light of the fire. The sharp cheekbones and pointed nose that she had become so well acquainted with both looked much the same as they had the last time she saw him. She supposed he did look older – it had been four years – but other than that, he was still the Ray Hawkeye that she had grown up with.
The only difference was his eyes. Those amber pools used to have a gentle quality to them. Now, they were hardened by war.
Now, they were the eyes of a killer.
"It's been awhile, Miss Mustang." His tone gave nothing away as his gaze fell on her. "No, perhaps I should call you 'Major Mustang' now."
Though to anyone else, his tone would have come off as highly professional, she knew him too well to fall for that. There was a hint of accusation in the way he said her new title. Even over the den of the still rowdy soldiers, she could hear the disappointment in the words he spoke.
Maes was confused by the interaction, letting out a sound of confusion. Both the soldier and the sniper chose to ignore him.
"Have you begun to remember?"
"How could I forget?" She swallowed hard, her voice shaking with immense guilt.
Of course, she remembered. She remembered nearly every conversation he had engaged her in for the two short years she had lived with him. She remembered every smile, every joke, every story shared between the two of them, that spoke of friendship rather than the strictly professional relationship that he had tried to build up with her – and she most definitely remembered what they had given each other the last time they were together.
Ray Hawkeye had given her flame alchemy, while she had given him hope.
'Some hope,' She thought as they continued to stare at one another.
Hughes at some point had decided to remove himself from the situation, joining in on the drunken shenanigans taking place around the fire with pictures of Gracia held in his hands. Raina would have laughed at such a sight if she wasn't so flustered by the events of the day. Never would she have believed she would see him here.
With Hughes gone, the two drifted away from the camp. Learning her lesson from last time, Raina didn't dare remove her gloves. When they were safely hidden behind a half wall of bricks, Hawkeye set his sniper rifle down before turning to her.
Raina Mustang had seen Ray Hawkeye beaten down before. She could remember the hard looks he would give her when he walked out of his father's study after receiving a verbal lashing. His amber eyes would appear defensive, just daring her to say a word about what had transpired, but there would be sadness there as well.
The Hawkeye that stood in front of her was beaten down – but in a way, that she had never seen before. This wasn't just a young man who was considered a disappointment to his father, this was a young man that got thrown into a war when he didn't believe in what he was fighting for.
Raina could relate to this man, more than she had ever been able to relate to him before.
The silence stretched between them until Hawkeye's quiet voice finally broke it.
"I was afraid of my father."
The admission was so quiet, that Raina half believed she hadn't actually heard it. She supposed though, that this was nothing new. She knew that Ray and Master Hawkeye had never seen eye-to-eye. Though Ray would always gaze at her coldly when he left his father's study, it wasn't enough to erase the memories she had of the voices she had heard beyond those doors.
'You're no good,' Berthold Hawkeye would say to his son from behind the wood, vitriol evident in his tone. 'You never took to alchemy, so I had to take on an apprentice just to ensure that my research does not die with me. The least you can do is help protect it. You act like it's such a burden to bear when really you are nothing more than the keeper of it.'
Raina had never understood what they were fighting about until the day of Master Hawkeye's funeral. That was also the day she had come to understand where the bruises on Ray Hawkeye's skin had come from and why he always seemed to be plagued by dry eye.
She knew he was afraid of his father, but god she never thought he would admit it.
He took her silence as a signal to carry on. "I was afraid because the sight of him absorbed in his research was as if he was possessed by something."
Raina nodded. "I remember."
She knew exactly what the man meant. Master Hawkeye would sometimes go days without speaking – days without eating – all for the sake of his research. He was practically catatonic during those episodes of extreme hyper fixation, and there was very little either she or his son could do to shake him out of it. As he got closer and closer to death, the episodes got worse and more volatile. He would yell and scream if you tried to deter him from his research. It was like a little piece of humanity left him every time he made a new discovery, like some kind of twisted form of equivalent exchange.
"Yet," He continued, sighing deeply. His dark eyes turned to the stars as if searching for an answer. His face grew remorseful. "I still believed in my father's words that this great power would bring happiness to many people."
Raina could remember Master Hawkeye carrying on about how important his research would be in building a better future. Despite his violent behaviors, the man was genuine in his desire to see his work be used for good.
Hawkeye switched his gaze from the stars to his hands. The hands that now could kill with only the twitch of a finger. Rough and calloused, he now had sniper hands.
"I truly believed alchemy could be used for the good of the people and that the military would protect this country's future
" His eyes moved to meet her own dark set. The disappointment in his expression was evident. "Please tell me, Major. Why are soldiers, who ought to protect citizens, killing them instead? Why is alchemy, which ought to bring happiness to the people, being used for murder?"
His words were like a knife to her heart.
She knew why he was posing this question to her. There was no mistake about it. Just as she had remembered every conversation between them, he had taken note of them as well. He remembered what she had told him when she ran off to join the Military Academy – the hope she had instilled within him that led him to handing over the secrets to flame alchemy.
He remembered that hope, because It was the same hope that had thrown him straight into a war.
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catflowerqueen · 5 years ago
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Sableye Backstory
So here’s that backstory I promised you all months ago now
 and which I worked on instead of writing the actual paper I have due this week
.
I’m going to go ahead and refer to the sableye by name throughout the narrative for ease of understanding, but none of them actually had individual names until some varying point after meeting Laura.
General Backstory:
This will also have to be split in several parts, since the six sableye that I lovingly refer to as the “Sableye Gang” actually started out as two distinct groups. Sort of.
Technically speaking, all six sableye and their families were originally part of a bigger clan/tribe of sableye, so they spent part of their early life together. They all had varied relationships to their blood relatives, but the six of them were always very close, and good friends with each other. They had their squabbles, of course, but more in the manner of close siblings—even though only Seis and Trois are actually related by blood. Or at least, they have the closest blood relationship—some of the others could probably be considered cousins, if only distantly, considering how tight-knit the clan used to be, but no one really bothered to do any sort of genealogical study to confirm that, nor do they really care either way. They’re all around the same age, with Cinq being the oldest and Trois the youngest—the age difference between the two of them probably isn’t any bigger than three years or so, however.
The leader of this clan was Seis and Trois’ grandfather. After his death, when the eldest of the gang (Cinq) was around six or seven, there was a schism in the group over which of the grandfather’s two sons should be the next leader. Ultimately, Seis and Trois’ uncle would win—and he ended up banishing the families that opposed him, so the gang was split up when Seis and Trois’ family was forced to leave. I’ll call this group “Group One,” because even though it’s the smaller of the two groups, it makes a bit more sense chronologically speaking to talk about this group first as far as Seis and Trois are concerned.
 Group One
This group did not fare well at all. They were smaller in number, and couldn’t take on bigger groups of pokĂ©mon, or strong solitary pokĂ©mon, and so often lost fights over food/territory. It wasn’t long before their leader—Seis and Trois’ dad—decreed that in order to survive, they needed to get rid of the dead weight. By this, he meant the kids—including his own sons. Luckily for the duo, however, their mother loved them very, very much and protected them, covering their escape. But she was severely injured in the process, and didn’t survive long. Her sons kept her chest gem as a memento, and then buried her before moving on and trying to make a life of their own. The safest thing for them was to keep moving and work on speed (and acting skills, in Seis’ case), since they’d already seen the results of what happened when a too-small, too-weak group tried to assert dominance—and they had the added handicap of being children. They managed fairly well for themselves for a year or two
 until Trois got really, really sick when Seis was around 8-9 years old. So sick, in fact, that Seis feared he would die, especially since he didn’t have any medical training and didn’t know how to help.
Luckily for them
 when Seis was out looking for some clean water to at least try and keep his brother comfortable, he ran into the Little Imp, who was out with Dusknoir on a sort of reconnaissance mission, and he convinced her to help. She basically bullied Dusknoir into going out and getting medicinal fruits and things—either by gathering them himself in the future or getting Dialga/Celebi to send him into the past to get some (because at this point I’m not entirely sure whether or not Little Imp and Celebi had their brief meeting that forced Celebi into moving away from Grovyle and closer to Dialga, where he could keep a watch over her). With her help, Trois manages to recover—though he’ll always have some health/physical development issues stemming from this incident. The only reason that she doesn’t adopt them on the spot is that Seis’ acting skills are so great, even at this stage, that he convinces her that he is way older than he actually is, and that this illness was a freak occurrence and the two do just fine by themselves usually—he totally has everything handled.
He does NOT have everything handled, but the two adults kind of scare him a little (or a lot) despite how helpful they’ve been—Little Imp because of her intensity and how genuine she is in her kindness and caring (since its something he hasn’t seen since his mother passed away) and Dusknoir because he’s just being his typical suspicious and intimidating self—and Seis fooled him as far as ages go, too. He would have probably toned things down at least a little had he known Seis was a child, and not just Trois, he would have toned things down a bit—given his own backstory, he’s always been pretty good with children. Though, granted, the children he’s most familiar with were actually fairly well-adjusted, considering the circumstances.
In any case, despite him not having nearly as good a grip on things as leads everyone he’s ever interacted with to believe, he actually managed fairly well after this incident.
 Group Two:
This group consisted of the remaining four sableye and their families. They mostly kept the same lifestyle that they’d had up until this point, as the group was still fairly large. Nothing major happened with them for roughly four or five years. But when the kids were around 9-10
 the group’s leader made a humongous mistake that changed the course of their lives.
Safe spaces to hide and rest are at a premium in the dark future, even for an experienced group like the sableye clan, so when they come across a cave—complete with a sort of door mechanism guarding the entrance—that looks untouched, despite being very well-hidden and near a grove of fruit trees
 they decide to try and make it their new base for a while. But the fact that it was so untouched despite being in such a great location should have set off some major warning signals, because shortly after the adults start trying to force the door open
 an absolutely furious Dialga shows up. Apparently, this location was the equivalent of a holy place, and Dialga does not take well to the perceived desecration. He starts a massacre, going so far as to actually ignore and push aside the Little Imp—who had been frantically trying to catch up to him and then stop him—and then the next thing the kids know, all the adults are dead. The only reason the kids survive is that the Little Imp shields them with her own body—going so far as to gather the absolutely freaked out kids in her arms and then turn her back to Dialga so that he wouldn’t be able to push her aside again—and then makes a desperate plea and tries to bargain with him. Dialga is too far gone to listen to reason—but he’s apparently still able to parse through plans of vengeance.
 Dialga is mad because the adult sableye were trying to break into a location that’s extremely precious to her, right? So if anyone deserves the right to punish the sableye, it would be her. But simply killing them is a waste, when there are more productive things that could be done—like making them into an object lesson for anyone else foolish enough to cross Dialga. And what good is an example if it can only be shown off once? Especially in this crazy world, where people are liable to forget things if they aren’t constantly exposed to it. So even though she absolutely hates the phrasing and implications, the Little Imp finally manages to secure the lives of the four kids by, essentially, putting them under her control and trading their lives for their freedom. It’s the only thing that makes the slightest bit of sense to Dialga, even though he hasn’t quite been appeased by the carnage he already wrought. In his mind, they owe the Little Imp everything—not because she spared their lives, but because they tried to ruin something that belongs to her, so she is owed repayment of some sort. Even if they didn’t actually do anything, and the whole thing was an accident.
 But the Little Imp hates it, absolutely hates it, because she doesn’t want the kids to feel like they owe her anything, or that they have to be servants. She just wants them to live, and to be able to be kids. But she knows that because of what Dialga just did and said, and because of what the world in general is like
 that can’t happen. Especially not now.
Still, despite the unfortunate implications and the trauma, she—and Dusknoir—try to help the kids and raise them the best they can. She doesn’t feel like she can really be a mother figure to them (which is why she never attempts to give any of them names—along with the fact that, as an adult, she actually has the chance to learn about pokĂ©mon naming conventions in general, and how some just don’t give specific names to their kids, for various reasons [such as in Dusknoir’s family, where the tradition is that the eldest child of the family remains unnamed in order to “carry on the family name/line/etc.” while all subsequent children get their own name. So Dusknoir, as the eldest, only has his species name while his younger brother, who remained a duskull, did get an actual name]), and she actually feels kind of awkward around them given the technicalities surrounding their situation
 but she still tries. And it eventually starts to work—at least, a little. Their relationship is extremely complicated, and they still think of her and Dusknoir as more their bosses/masters than anything like a family
 but they become extremely fond of her. They come to adore her, really, and feel safe enough to express the fact that they’re extremely grateful that she saved them—even if they don’t really get why she did. But before she can try to teach them more, or get them to understand their own worth—or the fact that they’re allowed to be angry that she couldn’t do more for them, that she chose this option rather than trying harder to change Dialga’s mind—she dies. This takes place when the eldest of them is around 12-13
 and they, along with Dusknoir and Dialga, are absolutely devastated. Also a bit afraid, since she was basically their shield from Dialga’s wrath
 but mainly they’re devastated.
 None of them even considers running, event though they probably could have completely escaped during this time of distraction, so they’re still kind of awkwardly mulling around in confusion and grief when Dialga finally regains himself enough to start plotting about kidnapping the Little Imp’s successor. Dusknoir is just as confused and grief-stricken as everyone else, but he also has enough age and sanity to be able to keep ahold of himself and make his own plans and realizes that, given how unhinged Dialga is at the moment, the sableye are in a very precarious position, because their connection to the Little Imp was the only thing keeping his master’s eyes off them. So he quickly takes full control of them himself, telling Dialga that it’s only until the Little Imp’s successor comes of age and can decide what she wants done for herself. Plus, they can still be effective bodyguards as she grows up. Given the nature of the Little Imp, and Laura’s connection to her (and, thus, to the cave that is at the root of this whole mess), Dialga agrees to this pretty readily. Also, he’s half distracted with making preparations and trying to wrest enough control/power from Palkia to be able to open another portal to the human world.
The sableye are pretty on board with this board with this plan, mostly because they don’t really know what else to do, and are fully prepared to take on the role of guard duty/whatever Dusknoir tells them to do—in part because it really isn’t too different than what they were already doing. They and Dusknoir were expecting the new human to be an adult—because, again, only Dialga for sure what is meant by “successor”—and the fact that Earth and the PokĂ©mon world are in different universes means that time doesn’t necessarily sync up exactly between the two [even without the mess that comes from the fact that time is currently messed up in the PokĂ©mon world], so just because
 let’s say, ten years or so have passed in Dialga’s perspective from the Little Imp coming to his world to her death, it doesn’t mean ten years have passed on Earth. It could have been twenty. Or a hundred. Or less than month. And by that same token, just because three-ish years passed on Earth from the time Laura was born to when she was kidnapped doesn’t mean that it took that same amount of time back in the PokĂ©mon world. So even though the timing on the Rainbow Child’s personal timeline would imply that the sableye should be around 16-17 or so when they met her next incarnation, by the time they meet Laura they’re all still around the 13-14 they were when the Little Imp died.
So while the gap in age between them in Laura is still a bit large
 it isn’t large enough that they aren’t all still basically kids. They’re more on equal footing—and Laura looks at them as friends and guardians more than anything else. The baggage isn’t there on either side, and they can befriend each other without worry—and, actually, the sableye are more or less encouraged to befriend Laura, because friends are what she wants and needs—and their job as her bodyguards is to keep her as happy and safe as possible. So they get to come to like her and be her friends and adore her as much as they want, without worrying overly much about what others think—though they still have to maintain a bit of “professionalism” in order to avoid ticking off Dialga, and they all know that, technically speaking, Laura is their actual boss—even if they’re listening to Dusknoir for now.
In any case, once Laura comes into Dusknoir/Dialga’s care, things proceed pretty much like she told everyone in Relatia’s Cave. The groups wouldn’t meet again for roughly 5-6 years after Laura makes her escape and befriends Grovyle.
 The Convergence of the Groups:
As I said earlier, despite the bluffing that Seis managed to pull off in regards to his actual competency level, he and his brother still managed things fairly well and eventually grew strong enough that they didn’t have to be in panic mode all the time, and could actually chill out and take things a bit slower. He was also able to reflect on things a bit more and decide that the Little Imp probably really was just that kind and genuine, and he probably owed her some sort of debt—or at least a more genuine thank-you. He came to the decision in part because Seis kept asking him for stories about the strangers who helped him back then, since he was really out of it and has no recollection of the events. The two of them (though, mostly Seis, really) decide to try and find her again, working off vague clues that Seis half-remembers about her being important to someone with a high status, and the two of them utilize Seis’ acting skills to gather more information eventually come into contact with Dusknoir again. To their utter shock and joy, when they finally do find him, it also brings them back into contact with their childhood friends—who are quick to assimilate them into their group once more. The two of them actually meet up with the group first before coming into contact with their boss. Dusknoir does not recognize them as the duo he’d helped before given that Seis is acting completely different now—or, rather, he isn’t acting, for once—and he didn’t actually get a good measure of Trois given the whole “riddled with illness” thing he had going on the last time they met. Seis elects not to bring it up—because while he was swapping stories with his friends on the way to go ask if they could formally join the group, he learned that the Little Imp had since passed away. He was devastated, of course, since it meant he never got the chance to formally and fully thank her for the fact that his brother is still alive. But Dusknoir hasn’t gotten any less intimidating since the last time he saw him, and considering how close the two were, he’s a little afraid of mentioning her at all in fear of how he might react—that, and he doesn’t want to bring up any sad memories for his friends, since they were really close to her as well. So no one but Trois actually knows that the two of them met her as well, and since Trois can’t actually remember it, he isn’t quite as impacted on the personal level that the others are.
Seis had already planned to join up with his friends in their work for a lack of anything else better to do, plus the fact that it provided more support and stability, and Trois was of course going to follow his brother, but, privately, Seis also decided to join for the sake of Laura—as the Little Imp’s successor (in more ways than anyone other than Dialga and possibly Dusknoir realize at this time), Seis figures that the debt he has towards the Little Imp transfers over to her. 
And he guesses he technically owes Dusknoir a debt to, and this does help to fulfill that one as well, but
 honestly, it’s more for pragmatic reasons that he elects to stay on the guy’s good side since, again, he’s kind of terrifying. The better bonus to the situation would be that his friends like Laura, and he likes his friends, so helping her helps them as well.
Given his complicated feelings on the matter of the Little Imp, and the way he’s transferred them onto Laura, one might assume that a better way to repay that debt would be to actually help her in her quest directly—but at this point in time, the fact that she and Grovyle are trying to change the past is more of a side note to the fact that she just straight up ran away from home. No one really realizes yet that changing the past will lead to their nonexistence, so they’re more concerned with the fact that she’s constantly putting herself into dangerous situations—which is an undeniable truth, since
 yeah, she is. And since he hasn’t spent any actual time with her, he and Trois don’t have the same conflicted feelings that some of the others might have in regards to the reasons why she’s doing what she’s doing. By the time that they figure out the ramifications for their existence if she and Grovyle manage to succeed in their plans
 well, he still hasn’t spent quite enough time with her to feel as conflicted as, say, Dos does, but he is fond of her for her own merits—rather than simply for that tenuous sense of obligation carrying over from the Little Imp—and has silently decided that he’s going to try and get to know her better/cheer her up and be as good of a friend as she’ll let him be once she’s captured for good. Or, at the very least, he’s going to make sure that she’s as physically protected as she can possibly be, since he can’t see her being too happy with the actual outcome of getting captured.
 That’s the basic backstory (though their ages are prone to flux as I pinpoint down exact dates and things, and how old they all feel in canon compared to how old it would reasonably make sense for them to be able to do things while still being able to keep close enough to Laura’s young age that it wouldn’t be weird for her to think of them and Grovyle as friends/older brothers)—but I do want to get into one last thing before signing off. Namely, how the sableye all got their names. Two of these stories have already been posted, but I’m not sure if I’ll end up doing specific ones for the rest, so I’ll just go ahead and list them here, in the order they were named.
1.      Dos: Laura gave him a name after the two of them bonded over painting when he was guarding her cell. She did it for a silly reason, and almost on an impulse, really, after she realized that the two of them had painted portraits of each other—meaning that there were now “two” of them, although she only pointed out her own painting in that explanation. There’s no real reason she decided to give him the Spanish translation of the number, aside from maybe her thinking that since it was in a different language than either of them typically spoke, it would sound more like a name. And “Dos” was less confusing for her to spell out than “Deux.”
2.      Cinq: She named him in guilt, after he got extremely injured picking her a bouquet of five flowers. Again
 she thought that the foreign language sounded more like a name than the English/pokĂ©mon equivalent translation (which is still technically English, but no one realizes/calls it that since their written language has, for some reason, evolved way beyond that to become pretty much unrecognizable. Is that how linguistics actually work? Probably not, but that’s what I’m going with). She chose French this time because, for whatever reason, she just thought that “Cinq” sounded more elegant/better than “Cinco” for a name.
3.      Un: Named because he was the first pokĂ©mon she ever saw, as he (along with Cinq) was one of the ones who came with Dusknoir to kidnap her from Earth. Since she’d already given two of the sableye names at this point, she just decided to go ahead and do the others as well—though she hadn’t realized that she was establishing a theme of numbers. They just sort of
 happened, because they fit the situations she was naming them for. As with Cinq, she chose the French version because she just thought it sounded better in this instance.
4.      Cuatro: He was the last one she gave a name while she was still in Dusknoir/Dialga’s custody, and he was was so named because he would typically greet her with four questions/fun facts whenever they saw each other, given his curious nature. This time, the Spanish version of the word sounded better. She still had not yet realized she’d locked herself into the number theme.
5.      Trois: The first time she met him (which was when he joined the others in trying to chase her down and capture her) he called her “Laura.” Just “Laura,” no honorifics—and he was only the third pokĂ©mon to ever do that (with the first being Dusknoir and the second Grovyle). Since practically no one ever used just her name—even Grovyle tended to call her “Partner” most of the time—this pleased her immensely. Of course, the other sableye were horrified by this, and quickly corrected him on the matter—the next time the group caught up with her and Grovyle, he was calling her “Miss Laura,” to her great displeasure. But she’d already given him a name, so she couldn’t change it now. She elected for “Trois” rather than “Tres” because ‘Tres” sounds like “Trace” when spoken aloud, and she wanted to highlight the “three” aspect in her naming reasoning.
6.      Seis: His is probably the most boring reason/story. She had finally by this point recognized the theme she’d inadvertently given the rest of the sableye (or had it pointed out to her by one of her friends), and felt compelled to continue with it. He’s named Seis because it means “Six,” she didn’t want to repeat a number, and the others alternated in language so next up was Spanish. If any other sableye joined up after him, they would have been named Sept to follow the theme and pattern. Seis takes it all in good humor—and probably figured out the reasoning behind his name without having to be told—though he can get a little annoyed when the others—especially Trois—tease him over it. And Trois likes to do it a lot, since he’s an annoying younger brother and revels in the fact that not only was he named first, despite being younger, but his name actually has a cool story behind it.
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razieltwelve · 5 years ago
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The Hamster (Fate/Stay Night/Final Effect)
There were a great many timelines where Rin Tohsaka’s attempt to summon a Sabre went awry. This was one of them. It was also the only timeline in which she summoned a hamster.
Fortunately for Rin, however, it was no ordinary hamster.
X     X     X
Rin assumed she must have done something absolutely awful in a past life. It was the only way to explain how she’d summoned a hamster as her Servant in the Grail War. Sure, the little guy was incredibly adorable, but what on earth was she supposed to do with him? If the situation weren’t so dire, she might actually have laughed. As it was, she wanted to cry.
She probably would have too, if an enemy Servant hadn’t chosen that exact moment to ambush her on her way home from school.
“You might want to duck,” Professor Cuddleborough drawled.
By some miracle of magic, Rin could understand the hamster she’d summoned. From what she’d seen so far, he was cute, cuddly, and came with a dry sense of humour. He also had good instincts.
She ducked.
And a spear went through the space her head had occupied a split-second later.
“Not bad,” Lancer said as Rin rolled away and then leapt back to put some distance between them. “But I’m afraid this is where the Grail War ends for you.” He shrugged and gave her an apologetic smile. “Sorry but my master’s orders were quite clear. It’s a pity you’ve only got a hamster to fight for you. I would have liked a challenge, but orders are orders.” He took up a fighting stance. “I’ll make it quick. I can do that much.”
“Hmmm
” Professor Cuddleborough hopped out of her pocket and landed on the ground in front of her. “You might want to take as step back, Rin.”
“What? Why?” Rin’s heart was beating so fast she was afraid she was going to faint. The only thing standing between her and certain death was a hamster! She was so screwed.
“Because I’m about to show you what makes me different from a normal hamster.” Professor Cuddleborough struck a pose. “For I am no mere hamster
 I am
 a war hamster!”
“A war hamster?” Rin wailed. “What does that even me?”
Lancer blurred forward

There was a flash of light, and the Servant was suddenly flying backward. He flew through the air, smashing through a streetlight before continuing to tumble end over end until he hit the next streetlight and thudded to a stop in the wall behind it, hitting the wall with enough force to leave a crater in it.
“Hmmm
” Professor Cuddleborough’s voice was suddenly much deeper
 and he was much larger. Instead of the cute and cuddly hamster that had spent the day in Rin’s pocket, he was now the size of a tank and covered in advanced power armour that absolutely bristled with weaponry. Lowering the enormous paw he’d used to bat Lancer away like a pingpong ball, the colossal hamster gave a sound of acknowledgement. “Not bad. You were able to block with your spear at the last moment. Otherwise, I’d have ripped you in half.”
Far away, Lancer stumbled to his feet. His chest was a mangled wreck, and his spear bore the marks of huge claws. Somehow, though, he managed to retain an air of confidence.
“Oh? A giant hamster? I can’t say I’ve ever faced one before.” Lancer chuckled. “I’ll admit you took me by surprise. But you’re no mere beast. That strike wasn’t simply powerful and swift
 your technique was excellent.”
Professor Cuddleborough chuckled. “Well, you’re definitely one of the better spearmen I’ve faced in my life although I’d have to fight you properly to see how you really rank.” He stomped on the ground, and the concrete cracked. “Although if we were to fight properly, it wouldn’t be just my claws you’d have to worry about.” On his back, a pair of cannons began to whirr, the ominous glow coming from them hinting at their power.
“Hmmm
” Lancer’s eyes narrowed. “It seems my master has seen enough. I’ve got to run for it.” He nodded at Rin. “It seems you’ve managed to summon a formidable Servant after all.” And then he was gone, vanishing in a blur of motion.
“
” Rin looked at her Servant. “A war hamster? I think you need to tell me a little bit more about who you are and where you’re from.”
X     X     X
“Yes,” Rin said. “He is apparently a war hamster from something called the Arendelle Empire that is, I think, an empire from another galaxy in another universe.”
“He’s a giant hamster.” Shirou stared at Professor Cuddleborough. The massive hamster had come to his and Sabre’s aid during their scuffle with Berserker. He had forced the other Servant to retreat although that had done nothing to quell Shirou’s curiosity. Berserker’s master had known who he was

“He is a truly noble beast.” Sabre had spent the last ten minutes running her hands through Professor Cuddleborough’s fur before simply giving in and wrapping her arms around the huge hamster, so she could bury her face in his fur. “A truly noble beast indeed.”
Professor Cuddleborough simply gave Rin an amused smile. This was, evidently, not the first time he’d experienced this. “We should be head home,” he said. “I’d rather not use any of my bigger guns in such a crowded area.”
“He has guns?” Shirou asked.
“I’m basically the equivalent of super-advanced heavy artillery,” the hamster replied. “Where I come from if you need something really, really dead, then you send in a war hamster. We’re often the first into battle and usually the last to leave.”
X     X     X
Author’s Notes
Although many hamsters over the years have carried the name of Professor Cuddleborough, this particular war hamster is the most famous of the lot. During his life, he earned the nickname “The Cuddle Hammer” due to his incredible war record. A hero famous through the Arendelle Empire, his deeds in combat were unmatched even amongst war hamsters, and he distinguished himself in countless battles.
Perhaps his most famous feat was singlehandedly saving the life of the emperor after the emperor’s dreadnought was brought down by Grimm during a massive battle. Heroically standing guard over the wounded emperor, the Professor Cuddleborough fought endless waves of Grimm for the better part of three days before reinforcements finally arrived. 
In the Empire’s long and stories history, it is not an exaggeration to say that he might be its most famous war hamster.
In the Fifth Grail War, Professor Cuddleborough was summoned by Rin Tohsaka. He is classified as an Archer due to the overwhelming ranged weaponry at his disposal due to his super-advanced power armour, which was the finest such armour in the Arendelle Empire during his lifetime.
However, as a war hamster, his physical prowess is unreal compared to a human, even a Servant. As a war hamster, he is fully capable of shrugging of artillery even without his power armour, and he can fight giant Grimm barehand. His stats are as follows:
Strength: A++ Endurance: EX Agility: A++ Mana: A++ Luck: A Noble Phantasm: EX
Abilities
For the Empire. Professor Cuddleborough once famously claimed that “As long the still Empire stands, I cannot fall
 and as long as I still stand, the Empire cannot fall!” In life, he was a hamster of unshakeable faith and determination, which allowed him to emerge victorious in situations that would have defeated countless others. The greater his belief in the cause he fights for, the stronger he will become. 
Cuddle Factor. Despite his immense combat power, Professor Cuddleborough is a descendant of Professor Cuddles, the cutest, most adorable hamster in history, and he is said to resemble him a great deal. Cuddle Factor grants him an A+ in charisma since all who look upon him will be captivated by his cuteness and adorability should he wish it. 
Mind of the Dia-Farron. As one of the greatest war hamsters in history, Professor Cuddleborough was also a scientific genius with intellect capable of matching even the illustrious Dia-Farron of the Empire. He can easily understand and replicate any technology that he is likely to come across.
Noble Phantasms
Power Armour. The power armour that Professor Cuddleborough uses is unique power armour that was crafted by the finest minds of the Empire using the finest materials in the galaxy. It is considered by many to be the greatest suit of power armour ever donned by a war hamster. In practical terms, the combined nuclear arsenal of the Earth could be launched at it, and they’d be lucky to scratch the paint. Given how much time he spent battling Grimm, it is also designed to withstand more esoteric attacks. When activated to its full extent, it can withstand even planet-buster level attacks.
Power Armour Arsenal. The offensive capabilities of his power armour are equal to its defensive capabilities. His default weapons include plasma cannons, laser cannons, warp claws, missiles pods, and gravity lances. However, he can scale up to weapons designed to break planets if necessary.
Once again, Rin manages to luck out when summoning a Servant. Sure, he’s a hamster, but he’s quite possibly the most badass hamster who ever lived from a galaxy full of badass hamsters.
You can find me on fanfiction.net, AO3, and Amazon.
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brushstrokesapocalyptic · 5 years ago
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The Legend of Asriel PART 6 | DEATH MOUNTAIN
it’s about as unpleasant as it sounds.
Frisk and Chara reach Death Mountain, and their first order of business is seeking out a blacksmith who can reforge their sword. There’s a bit of a famine going on right now so none of the Gorons are in working condition, but someone happens to direct Frisk to a Zora who lives just out of Goron City.
Following those directions, Frisk and Chara find an elderly turtle man sunning himself on the edge of a hot spring. Chara recognizes him and is confused as to why he’s here. Frisk knows not of their history with this guy though, and just walks up to ask if he can help reforge their sword.
Gerson laughs and says he’s not called the Hammer for nothing, he’s sure he can fix whatever toy sword they broke during target practice. Frisk removes the bundle from their backpack and shows him the shards of the Master Sword. Gerson rubs at his chin. “Hmm. Tricky one, that.”
Can you do it? Frisk writes in their notebook.
“The blade shouldn’t be too hard, I’ve got all the material I need here.“ Chara resists the urge to bring up the missing piece. “The hilt is harder, it’s made of a special material you can’t just melt down and cast into a new shape. I’d need to make another from scratch.“
Is it rare?
“Somewhat. As luck would have it, there is a deposit in the nearby mines, but those are flooded out.”
Frisk looks him up and down. ...Aren’t you like, a turtle? Surely a little water can’t stop you.
Gerson laughs heartily. “A little water is nothing, even for my old bones. Lava, however, poses quite a risk.“
Frisk makes a soft noise of understanding. If I got you a piece of this stuff, could you reforge it then?
“Of course!“ Gerson says. “I’d be delighted to, in fact. Not everyone can say they reforged the Legendary Blade of Evil’s Bane!“
Frisk beams, bundles the shards back up, and tells Gerson they’ll be back soon before hurrying off again. Chara trails them with a skeptical look. “Okay I appreciate the enthusiasm, but how exactly do you plan to get this weird rock? Do you have a supplier or something?”
Frisk slows to a stop, staring into the sky with a look of impending realization.
“...You didn’t think that far ahead, did you.“
Frisk most assuredly didn’t, but they won’t let that stop them! They do some more poking around, and eventually encounter a Hylian bard living it up in the town square, providing a brief moment of levity for the Gorons in this trying time.
Chara wonders how he can stand wearing such impractical clothing in this sweltering volcano, and Mettaton offhandedly mentions something about the laboratory near the peak before he registers that the person he just replied to is a ghost.
The dude doesn’t stick around, leaving Frisk and Chara with just the clue pointing towards the laboratory. It’s not much, but it’s all they’ve got, so they go to investigate.
The lab seems abandoned at first, all dark and messy and stuff. Frisk pokes around a bit, not giving it up as a lost cause just yet, and then Chara hears a weird scuffling noise. Frisk sees them tense, and they turn around just in time to see a flash of golden scales vanishing around a corner.
They give chase, and with a little help from Chara they track down the mysterious creature. A light flickers on, and Frisk finds themself face to face with a yellow Lizalfos in a lab coat.
For a moment, the two of them stare each other, down. Frisk isn’t quite sure what to make of the monster, and the Lizalfos looks kinda like a deer in the headlights. After a moment, though, Frisk’s hand inches towards their sword, and the Lizalfos rears back not to attack, but to frantically wave her hands defensively.
“Wait wait wait I can explain!“ she says, and it takes Chara a moment to dart into the right spot to interpret because they were not expecting a talking lizard. “Y-you see, I’m not a-actually a monster! I-I’m Dr. Alphys, and I’m t-t-totally a normal person, I’m j-just cursed to look like this! J-j-just c-cursed!“
Frisk raises an eyebrow, removing their hand from their sword and straightening up. They glance at Chara, who just shrugs, then dig out their notebook again. Do you need any help with that?
“N-n-no, it’s quite alright!“ Alphys says, looking a little sheepish. “I-I-I don’t get out much s-s-so it’s not like it matters how I look! I’ve got all my brains u-up here, s-so I’m fine!”
Frisk nods, relieved that they don’t have to add another layer to this fetch quest chain. I heard you can make heat-resistant clothing, they write.
“Where did you—“ Alphys starts, before pausing. “O-oh, I suppose I did give Mettaton some of my prototypes... how were they, by the way? That guy never gives me useful feedback.“
Frisk shrugs. He didn’t look bothered by the heat, but honestly it’s not that bad.
“Speak for yourself,“ Chara comments. “I’d be dying if I weren’t already dead. You’re just a weird desert gremlin.“
Frisk ignores them.
Alphys, unaware of the ghost floating next to her, nods thoughtfully. “Good, good, the tests I ran seemed positive but it’s good to have more data. Oh— w-were you interested in my fireproof clothing as well?“
Frisk nods. If it’s available, I’d like to buy a set.
“O-of course! Might I ask what you n-need it for?“
I wanna go into the mines but I hear they got flooded with lava.
Alphys pauses. “...Erm, a-and why do you want that?”
I need a special stone to reforge this legendary sword that got broken.
A long moment passes between them.
“...Can’t argue with that,“ Alphys says, then turns and walks away.
Frisk pays up and Alphys custom fits them with a nice heatproof tunic which I haven’t designed yet, but I probably will eventually and whenever that happens I’ll probably edit in a picture here.
But anyway now they’re decked out in sweet fashion and so they trek off to the mines, which are another dungeon. I don’t have nearly as much to say as I did for the Lost Caverns. It’s a bunch of mines and stuff, there’s magma. They get the Burnt Hammer, which is basically the equivalent of the burnt pan but like. It’s a hammer. And there’s some kinda a monster or possessed machinery or a monster possessing machinery, and after Frisk kicks its ass the mines go back to normal and everyone rejoices and they get a cool blue rock which happens to be timeshift stone but shhhhhhh it’s not that important.
And so they return triumphantly to Gerson’s forge, materials in tow, and ask him to reforge the Master Sword for them. Gerson laughs, declares that they truely do have the soul of a hero. Then he asks what kind of sword they’d like him to make it into, at which point they kinda stall out because they were kinda assuming it’d just be forged back into its original shape.
“Nonsense,“ Gerson says. “Trying to copy the original perfectly is a fool’s errand, and if it’s going to be reforged for a new wielder why not have them choose its shape?“
Frisk agrees with this reasoning, but they don’t know enough about swords to make a decision. Chara, however, does. They tap Frisk on the shoulder, an odd glint in their eye, and spell something out for Frisk to write in their notebook. They show it to Gerson, and he clearly knows what it means as he laughs again and gets right to work on that sword.
It takes time to make a sword, and so Frisk stays a couple nights in Gerson’s cottage. Chara keeps randomly snickering every time the Master Sword comes up in conversation, and they refuse to explain themself, so Frisk just resigns themself to finding out what they told Gerson to make when the sword is done.
After the better part of a week has passed with Frisk doing various sidequests for the Gorons, Gerson finally presents them with the reforged Master Sword.
Frisk unwraps it from the cloth covering carefully, examining the sheath before tugging it free to look at the blade. It’s beautifully crafted, the hilt carved into something reminiscent of a bird while the blade is razor sharp. They can’t help but admire the craftsmanship, and even Chara pauses to ooh and aah a little before they collapse into another fit of giggles.
“You know, it’s kinda funny you picked that kind of sword,“ Gerson comments, and Chara barely manages to pull themself back together enough to interpret. “See, there was this young whippersnapper I used to know, and they always said that was their favourite kind of sword. You know why?“
Frisk tilts their head in a silent question.
“They said it was ‘cause of the way the hilt is put together,“ Gerson explains. “In their words, it isn’t technically a sword. Just a very large knife.“
Chara descends into a full on fit of laughter. Frisk stands there for a long moment, then looks back down at the Master Sword. Then they set it down and take out their notebook. Does that make this the Master Knife, then?
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Gerson joins Chara in laughing. “I like your style,” he tells them, as he follows them to the door. “Remember me after you’ve saved the world, alright, kid?”
Frisk nods, slinging the Master Knife over their back, and slaps Chara on the shoulder on the way out to get them to stop laughing already, it’s not that funny.
(It’s absolutely that funny, Chara insists inside their own head. God they love knives.)
[Next Part] [Index]
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rocketraccoonmeta · 6 years ago
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Who Is Rocket’s Creator?
(No Endgame Spoilers)
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Disclaimer: my theory wouldn’t be here today without the planets being pointed out in the Easter egg hunt here
Also, the app butchered my formatting so please open this post in a browser, not the app! 
So, I’m not entirely sure how widely accepted this theory is but I believe that 100% High Evolutionary is Rocket’s Creator.
Obviously, in the comics this is different. Rocket, among other animals like a hare and an otter, is taken from earth and made to be human-like to look after mentally insane beings on a planet called Halfworld.
In the MCU, his origin is also listed as Halfworld, and Lylla (his sentient otter soulmate) is mentioned in the prison lineup screenshot so one might assume that he has the same origins as the comics.
But James Gunn says otherwise.
“As you know, the MCU is one way of processing these characters. [Universe] 616 is a different one. We are going to learn more about where Rocket comes from in the coming sagas. It’s going to be a little different from the comics. We already know a lot about from where he came from. It’s a little bit more horrible than what it is in the comics when you come down to it. We will learn more about that.”
Universe-616 AKA Earth-616 is the main comic book canon universe. Anything that’s not canon to the comic books is set in a different universe with a different number. For example, the MCU number is Earth-199999. So he’s said that 616 Rocket Raccoon origins aren’t the same as our 199999 Rocket.
Also, James Gunn confirmed that Rocket isn’t an Earth/Terran raccoon. Hence the drop of “Raccoon” at the end of his title. Cause he’s not a raccoon!
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This is also made apparent when Drax recognises Rocket’s species in Vol.1:
"I recognise this animal. We'd roast them over a flame pit as children. Their flesh was quite delicious."
Anyway, we’ve established that Rocket isn’t from earth, he’s a raccoon-like alien species that someone experimented on. He is from Halfworld but, James has hinted at retconning this.
He didn’t say it was that fact in particular, but he has stated multiple times that Rocket and Groot are his two favourite characters so I believe he would want to explore them more. That, and Gamora being the last of her species has already been retconned in Infinity War. While Gunn could retcon Tibius Lark in Groot’s bio, it wouldn’t make any sense as that Groot is dead, and there’s no one in the comics with that name. A bit of a mystery.
So I would say he’s retconning Rocket’s origin planet, or the fact that one of his listed associates is Lylla (the otter). James Gunn has already basically said that Lylla is not going to make an appearance because their love and Lylla herself could get “really cartoony” which is something they were very worried about as they considered leaving Rocket out of the Guardians films. Either way, it’s safe to assume Rocket was made for a different reason than a companion for the insane.
Now to the meta.
From GOTG Vol.1, James Gunn has said that he likes Adam Warlock a lot and does want him to make an appearance. The post credit scene of Vol.2 hints at his appearance in the next film.
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In the comics, he’s not made by Ayesha (The Sovereign High Priestess), but she’s his genetic twin. He escapes his first creators, almost dies at Thor’s hands, then goes into a cocoon again. When he comes out the second time, High Evolutionary AKA Herbert Wyndham becomes his mentor/adoptive father. And also gives him the Soul Stone.
In the movie, Ayesha has created him and that’s all we know from there. Will he seek the Guardians to destroy them like Ayesha wants? Or will he break out before we even see in in GOTG Vol.3 and he’s with Herbert?
The findings in the Easter Egg hunt point out that before choosing Ego, Rocket flicks through a list of planets: Drez-Lar, Hala, Terra and Terma.
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Drez-Lar I can’t find out much about. Nova (Ryder) was there once. From the name you can tell it’s a Kree planet, but other than that I had a hard time with info.
Hala is the Kree homeworld. In the comics, it’s actually destroyed. I’m assuming it’s not decimated in the MCU seeing as it’s showing up in the system.
Terra is Earth! Quill’s home planet.
Now, Terma. Terma is only mentioned once in the entirety of the comics. Gunn could have chosen any planet that’s more well known for the viewers to cameo. But he didn’t. Terma is the Kree outworld where two characters found Adam Warlock in his cocoon. After Adam is awakened, he flies to a laboratory inside Terma’s star where he rendez-vous with his adoptive father Herbert Wyndham (High Evolutionary).
This is the important link.
High Evolutionary is a scientist, a master geneticist. Extremely intelligent. Not exactly the most humane person. He did... experiments.
He created the New Men. The New Men are, and I quote, an “artificial race of mutagenically altered, human-sized animals created to possess human-equivalent minds and consciousness”. Sound like someone we know?
Now, there’s a difference with Rocket here though.
Rocket isn’t human sized. My bet is on Rocket being an early experiment of his, instead of him being naturally bipedal, he has a normal alien-raccoon skeleton, so Herbert tore him apart and put him back together over, and over, and turned him... bipedal.
Herbert hadn’t figured out the minutiae of the process, hence why Rocket was an experiment, and not a creation. This also is further supported by Rocket saying “Ain’t no thing like me, ‘cept me”; Rocket was a failure so Herbert didn’t follow the process to make another one like him.
Also, mutagenically altered (how they describe the New Men) and genetically engineered (how they describe Rocket) mean the same thing, just different wording.
Another thing to note: Herbert banished a sentient cockroach (going to be a part of the New Men) into space because he was cocky and refused to follow Herbert’s orders. That sounds like something Rocket would do as well.
Also, it may just be coincidence, but there are a few other things in Vol.2 I want to point out that seem like a nod to Rocket’s past as well.
Firstly, we are reminded of Rocket’s past by the man himself as they try to manoeuvre the quantum asteroid field:
“I was genetically engineered to pilot a spacecraft”
Then right after that, they crash land on Berhert. Which is a real place in the comic books, but it’s also an anagram for Herbert. Coincidence? Maybe. But James Gunn could have made them crash on any other planet in the universe. He chose this one.
Secondly, he is called something he’s not a total of six times on Berhert.
“Yeah, that’s how eyesight works, you stupid raccoon!” - Quill
“I’m sorry. I took it too far. I meant trash panda.” - Quill
“Can I pet your puppy? He is adorable.” - Mantis
“Your associates are welcome. Even that triangle-faced monkey over there.” - Ego
“You’re leaving me here with that fox?!” - Nebula
“Hey there, rat.” - Yondu
Six times on the planet Berhert, the audience are subconsciously reminded that, no, he’s not any of those things. He’s a raccoon-like genetically-enhanced alien.
Thirdly, in a metaphorical basis, The Sovereign drove Rocket into facing his past (Chased them to crash land on Berhert [Berhert = Herbert] plus the constant name-calling bringing his past to attention).
Is this foreshadowing Volume 3? I think so. My predictions for the movie is that Adam (created by The Sovereign) and Herbert will be in it, and that they will be the antagonists. This will force Rocket to confront his past, among other things. I can’t go into much more detail about why I believe this is going to happen because I am not about to spoil endgame for anyone.
I will upload a follow-up theory to go with this one as to why I believe Adam and Herbert are so important for the next GOTG film (+ the future MCU) in the coming weeks. 
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davidmann95 · 6 years ago
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Some Kingdom Hearts future thoughts
Have to get ‘em out! Went into some thoughts with my psuedo-review of III, but I’ve got others and stuff worth expanding on. I’ll put them under the cut since it clearly goes into spoilers, except for my boldest, most controversial guess: along with being announced either this year or next (since Kingdom Hearts has never reached the end of a calendar year after a release with nothing on the horizon) I think Kingdom Hearts IV is going to be a 2022 release. I recognize that sounds like an intensely generous timeframe, but I have several reasons:
1. Above all else by far: once again, Square Enix and Disney are going to be on Nomura’s ass, nose to the grindstone, to get him to start delivering these on a consistent basis again. Do you think they’re looking at Kingdom Hearts III topping sales charts and thinking “well, it sure was worth the wait”, or do you think they’re going “gosh, these are some nice sales, sure would be nice if it came out years ago and we had a bunch more similarly-selling titles by now, let’s try and aim for something closer to that in the future”. Especially-especially since Nomura and the actors aren’t getting any younger and the series is at a point where the core fanbase for the franchise as-is is going to be the primary target rather than new audiences, which means it has to wrap up in a timeframe where that’s still a viable market. So rapid, priority development and few if any more spinoffs. I mean, not as if there’s really a handheld platform for them to be on anymore.
2. My understanding (and this is going somewhat into the technical side of things, so I’m going thirdhand here based on what I’ve heard from others) is that the lifecycle of the current console generation isn’t going to run out for quite a bit yet, so they can reuse a lot of the assets and whatnot from III.
3. A big deal was made about Dream Drop Distance coming out on the 10th anniversary of the franchise, and given 20 is a much wilder number for this series than most equivalents when it’s about a single cast of characters going through a single story, I can’t imagine they won’t want to push that as at least a similarly big deal.
4. Finally, when things don’t go as catastrophically off the rails as III did, these games seem to have a fairly consistent 3-4 year development span (even III, once they announced the beginning of development in 2013, would have come out 2017-early 2018 if not for switching from Luminous to Unreal Engine), and for the reasons I listed above I think this is going to be on the speedier end of that.
* Firstly: the main discussion I’m seeing at this point regarding IV is “it’s gonna be a Kingdom Hearts/The World Ends With You/pseudo-Final Fantasy Versus XIII crossover!”, and I really expect and hope that isn’t the case. Not that I’ll be pissed if it is, I’m sure it would still be rad, but it strikes me as both unlikely and the lesser outcome. I don’t know that I see the powers that be diverting resources in one of their biggest cash cows towards a sequel to one of their minor games - one that’s already been in Kingdom Hearts, meaning its inclusion here wouldn’t reasonably be a huge enough deal to base a lot of the full story on - and a way to reimagine another project. And for that matter it strikes me as conceptually small-scale given the setup. Nomura went with a name in Yozora that doesn’t just have the bent meaning of Sora’s name but actually literally sounds like him, went with a setting that aside from the one cameo sign mainly screams to viewers “Sora’s suddenly in the real world, holy cow”, and unless I entirely misread it Verum Rex was presented as a total self-roast in Toy Box. It doesn’t strike me as spot-the-reference (even though that’s 100% in there) nearly so much as establishing a tonal contrast to Kingdom Hearts.
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I joked initially about this being a Flash of Two Worlds! (linking to a description for non-comics readers who are here because I tagged Kingdom Hearts)/’Kingdom Hearts goes to war with its own gritty fanfic’ setup, but...I actually suspect that’s pretty close to what’s going on here? This seems like a send up of Final Fantasy’s relative self-seriousness and over the top Super Cool characters, as a contrast to Sora’s goofy open-hearted sincerity and optimism. It’s the Secret Movie aesthetic that some want not just more prominent but as the actual main tone of the series morphed into an entire universe all its own, and Sora, out of place, has to find his way through and back home even as the real threat mounts, and probably has to save this world and get through to its heroes who aren’t likely prone to grinning through off-the-cuff monologues about the heart. That is not only entirely my kind of ridiculous meta jam, it feels like a logical next step for the series: if the first trilogy was in part about growing up, the next (and I suspect last, as the Master of Masters and his Foretellers have been set up as the primordial antagonists of the entire mythology and this is where they’re coming to the fore; my old theory of Eraqus being the big bad of an intermediary trilogy looks solidly shot to hell) could very well be about reaching adulthood, in which case it makes sense Sora would have to pass through a near literal fire of Adolescent/Adult Cynicism.
* Speaking of where Sora ends up: I kinda doubt he’s literally dead, or that if he is it’ll last past the opening of the game. They’ve already made a big theatrical production of Sora dying twice now, the second time in the most literal way possible and just a few hours prior to this, so while third time’s the charm I think there’ll be more to it than that. The again common thing I’ve been seeing is that he’ll have to play the Reaper game to win his life back (not something I’m much familiar with but I think I’ve got the basics), but again, while it’ll certainly be part of the game I don’t think TWEWY is going to be the big thing here (like they’d really make that a bigger deal than the Final Fantasy elements have been), and he just dealt with the afterlife and had to essentially play a game to win his soul back, and this wouldn’t even be a game he’s unfamiliar with. My impression is he’s incorporated back and whole - if likely powered down from the ordeal to justify him being back at level one - and the mystery is less whether or not he’s truly alive so much as how he ended up here and how to get back.
* On the other end of things - and I realize it’s a risky prospect to suggest after her getting a shockingly small role compared to everyone else in III was the damning weak aspect of its otherwise basically perfect finale - I think this is where Kairi is actually going to start to come to the forefront. She and Riku would be at the head of a search that everyone would be a part of (they were there when it happened, they know death is negotiable in their world, and they’re good people who all owe him), her especially since he’s her boyfriend - they may not declare it outright but there’s clearly no ambiguity between the two of them as to their situation anymore - and the one he sacrificed himself for, and she’s out there fighting now even if she’s inexperienced. And Riku seems like he’s going to end up lost himself on the search, leaving her behind as the sole Destiny Trio representative. So even if she isn’t a playable co-lead I wouldn’t be surprised if she was the one going on a more traditional Kingdom Hearts adventure searching with the rest while Sora and later Riku deal with the genre mindfuck. On the bright side if nothing else, she’s died twice now too and they’ve both been presented as dead in a “maybe this time for real” way for a finale, so while again third time’s the charm, I figure she and Sora are relatively bulletproof from here on out.
* Speaking of Riku, while this seems more like an old-school proof of concept trailer from I and II rather than the more recent actual scenes, meaning his appearance might well change just as Kairi was different in I’s Secret Movie than she really was in II, it’s very notable that he hasn’t aged at all. So likely instead of another tragic I to II scale timeskip of Sora being lost from his friends, it looks like IV will be picking up immediately and the search for him won’t take long to succeed. Also speaking of Riku, I seem to see people thinking he’s with Namine now? Not that that seems impossible, but while the scene as a whole is romanticized in that it’s basically a princess being carried away by chariot to her happily-ever-after, it reads to me less as an actual romance than Riku fulfilling his ‘brother’s promise. Though if Square/Nomura does want to really get into romance with the next trilogy, since Sora/Kairi is locked down maybe they’ll just say fuck it and do a whole Riku/Namine/Xion/Roxas Love Square situation.
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* Actual prediction rather than analysis of evidence: I suspect this is the last major time the Destiny Trio is going to be split up, at least in the searching-for-each-other, not-knowing-if-everyone’s-alive sense. I was the search for Kairi, II for Riku, and now IV for Sora - that cycle looks to be completing. Wouldn’t be surprised if V and/or the finale was finally the three of them as the adventuring party as fans have wanted for so long, with III as the grand finale to Sora/Donald/Goofy.
* It seems early to predict the main villain, but at the same time everyone was accurate in assuming a Keyblade-wielding Xehanort would be the final boss of the trilogy circa 2006, so I’m gonna go ahead and say Xigbar/Luxu is gonna be the end-all with IV. The Master of Masters is still the end of the road, and perfect for it because he’s a real-world normal savvy guy who can manipulate this world of straightforward classical adventurers with ease, while Sora at the opposite end of the scale is silly and sweet even by that world’s standard. But Luxu addresses the same ideas in a way that’d be perfect for this game in particular as it seems to be set up, he’d be the villainous connective tissue as this game moves from one trilogy to another, and he has the dangling personal thread of the ‘reward’ he suggested was coming for Sora. Or hell, since now it looks like she’s at least somewhat privy to what’s going on, maybe Maleficent will finally step back up.
EDIT: Ooh, just remembered, speaking of what Xigbar says to Sora, his Olympus conversation also predicts Sora’s fate? The whole “if you leap in to save somebody, you might just end up in the clutch needing to be saved yourself” lecture, i.e. the premise for IV. Maybe his teach isn’t the only one privy to future events?
* Not both, they’ll wanna space it out, but I’m like 70% sure this is where Marvel or Star Wars are gonna happen.
* Finally, while I’ve heard speculation that the Mystery Star is one of the Foretellers or the person who died in that Union X game, I don’t think she’s one of them given it’s a new voice actor and she cites a name Sora knows. More likely she’s ‘Subject X’ (I went ahead and looked up the Secret Reports, haven’t gone back and done all the bonus challenges myself yet and won’t I imagine for some time), who does seem to be from that time but is I think someone new.
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professional-anti · 6 years ago
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Chapter Eleven: Magnus Bane
Okay, kiddos. Let’s go.
Jace and Clary leave the Brotherhood HQ, and Jace calls the cab driver a “brain-dead moron”. You know what, here’s the full quote:
Jace leaned forward and banged his hand against the partition separating them from the cab driver. “Turn left! Left! I said to take Broadway, you brain-dead moron!”
Oh, man, I’m so hot for Jace you guys. He’s so evil and cruel. I’m fanning myself. And the reason he wants to take Broadway? He wants breakfast. That’s it. It’s not a life-or-death situation. He wants fucking breakfast.
I like the idea of the diner they go to. A place where magical ppl can get together for some spaghetti. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this, but I LOVE the idea of a secret (or not-so-secret) magical Manhattan. It’s just so unfortunate that Clare’s is so bad.
Clarinet asks Jack-Jack about Magnus Bane. Jack-Jack explains that he’s a warlock. Alec shows up. Clare is the foreshadowing master.
Clary freaks out about a guy in front of the store who looks like a demon. Clary. Girl. Come on. You know about this stuff already. It’s been like two days. Calm down. Apparently he’s a bouncer (for a diner) and is the warlock equivalent of a squib.
Honesty, I love this diner. They have blood on tap!!!! That’s so cool!!!!!! Plus, the people eating there sound way more interesting than our MCs.
[A] boy with spiky blue dreads was sitting next to a beautiful Indian girl with long black hair and gauzelike golden wings sprouting from her back.
Gotta love how the only people of color are basically set-dressing, though. At least Simon is Jewish, even with the messed up antisemitic crosses-burned-into-him dream thing. Clare’s Jewish, though, so of course she represents only herself and leaves everyone else out in the cold.
Alec shows up:
There was a kinetic, almost feverish energy to [Alec] that hadn’t been there before. Something about Jace sharpened him, brought him into focus. If she were going to draw them together, she thought, she would make Jace a little blurry, while Alec stood out, all sharp, clear planes and angles.
Oh, here it is. The “poor gay boy only comes to life in front of hopelessly straight crush” trope. Bc Alec has nothing better to do than obsess over Jace, a boy who is currently being rude to the waitress. Does Clare honestly not know how annoying rude boys are?
Isabelle and Simon show up. Apparently, even Isabelle’s perfume is evil:
Isabelle’s hair tickled [Clary’s] face, smelling of some kind of vanilla perfume. Clary fought the urge to sneeze. She hated vanilla perfume. She’d never understood why some girls felt the need to smell like dessert.
Haven’t I mentioned? Clary is the best girl to ever girl. Isabelle can’t even order right. Instead of getting something reasonable, like a large order of coconut pancakes (gross, Clary), “Isabelle fastidiously order[s] a fruit smoothie”.
Jace goes off to flirt with the waitress. Clary is confused bc the waitress is a Downworlder and aren’t they, like, totally evil? Isabelle and Alec assure her that the only kill the bad Downworlders. The rest they let live.
“Like letting spiders live because they eat mosquitoes, Clary thought.” Uh, not really. The Downworlders aren’t spiders. They’re just people, living their lives.
“So they’re good enough to let live, good enough to let live, good enough to make your food for you, good enough to flirt with—but not really good enough? I mean, not as good as people.” Isabelle and Alec looked at her as if she were speaking Urdu. “Different from people,” said Alec finally.
This doesn’t really seem like such a difficult question? Isabelle and Alec are just trying to cover up their bullshit.
“Better than mundanes?” said Simon. “No,” Isabelle said decidedly. “You could turn a mundane into a Shadowhunter. But you could never turn a Downworlder into one of the Clave. They can’t withstand the runes.”
So Shadowhunters judge others based on their ability to become Shadowhunters? Seems not at all racist. I’m so glad we had this chat. Jace comes back and explains that there’s just a shit-ton of hostility between Shadowhunters and Downworlders, so it’s not really racism.
Miracle of miracles, Isabelle reveals that Magnus Bane has invited the magical community of New York to his house for a party. God, I love parties.
There’s a whole day before the party, so Simon and Isabelle decide to go for a walk in Central Park. For some reason, this makes Clary feel a “murderous rage”. These emotions are seriously not healthy.
Back at the Institute, Clary goes exploring in the library and finds a photo of her mom and other Order of the Pheonix members-cum-Deatheaters Shadowhunters. Evil Giles shows up and points out Valentine, Luke, the Lightwoods, Jace’s mom, and himself in the picture. Clary mentions that Jace doesn’t look anything like his father. What could this possibly mean?
Honestly, the concept of a book about the children of villains isn’t terrible. It really just the complete ripping-off of Harry Potter that annoys me.
Oh, God. Clary gets back to her room (armed with a sleeping potion from Hodge) to see Jace looking at her sketchbook. I’m not even good at drawing, and my sketchbooks are still deeply personal. You can’t just look in someone’s sketchbook! It’s like a diary! WTF, Jace!
In fact, Clary tells Jace that it’s  basically a diary and that he shouldn’t look at it. This should be obvious.
Wait, I’m laughing:
“You could try not being charming all the time,” Clary said. “It might be a relief for everyone.”
BITCH, WHERE???
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Jace offers to tell Clary a bedtime story. It’s the famous falcon story, the one that Clare used in her Harry Potter fanfiction. You know, where Jace’s father gives him a falcon to train, and when Jace loves it, his father kills it. Proof that Jace is Draco.
Somehow, Clary makes the connection that this story is about Jace only as she falls asleep. Whatever.
Isabelle wakes up Clary. Again, a famous moment:
[Isabelle] looked like a moon goddess. Clary hated her.
Bitch, Isabelle is a moon goddess, and I love her.
Yes, we have a makeover scene!! My secret weakness. I’m sorry, fellow patriarchy fighters. Makeover scenes are just so good.
Isabelle continues to be the coolest person in this book:
Her room looked as if a disco ball had exploded inside it. The walls were black and shimmered with swirls of sponged-on golden paint. Clothes were strewn everywhere: on chairs, spilling out of the closet and the tall wardrobe propped against one wall. Her vanity table, its mirror rimmed with spangled pink fur, was covered in glitter, sequins, and pots of blush and powder.
I want this room!
Clary gets a slinky black dress, fishnets, and boots. I want this outfit, too. When Isabelle does Clary’s makeup, Clary asks if Alec is gay. For some reason, this causes an intense shock in Isabelle:
Isabelle’s wrist jerked. The eyeliner skidded, inking a long line of black from the corner of Clary’s eye to her hairline. “Oh, hell,” Isabelle said, putting the pen down. “It’s all right,” Clary began, putting her hand up to her eye. “No, it isn’t.” Isabelle sounded near tears as she scrabbled around among the piles of junk on top of the vanity . . . She sat down on the edge of the bed, ankle bracelets jingling, and looked at Clary through her hair. “How did you guess?” she said finally. “I—” “You absolutely can’t tell anyone,” said Isabelle. “Not even  Jace?” “Especially not Jace!” “All right.” Clary heard the stiffness in her own voice. “I guess I didn’t realize it was such a  big deal.” “It would be to my parents,” said Isabelle quietly. “They would disown him and throw him out of the Clave—” “What, you can’t be gay and a Shadowhunter?” “There’s no official rule about it, But people don’t like it. I mean, less with people our age—I think,” she added, uncertainly, and Clary remembered how few other people her age Isabelle had ever really met. “But the older generation, no. If it happens, you don’t talk about it.”
Okay. So. I’m trying to judge this for when it was written. But, like. Is the homophobia necessary? It’s kind of like the ridiculous sexism in ACOTA/R. It’s a choice the author is making, for, like, no good reason. This is a case of a straight author needlessly torturing her gay character. But since this was published in 2007, I feel like this has been talked out, so let’s move on.
IT TURNS OUT THAT ISABELLE’S ANKLETS ARE WEAPONS. I LOVE HER. WE ARE GETTING MARRIED. WEDDING INVITATIONS TO FOLLOW.
Ugh, Simon short-circuits bc Clary is wearing a short skirt. Please calm down, sweetie. You’re embarrassing me. Wait, what is even going on here? Jace gives Clary a dagger, and, uh, this happens:
“I could give you a thigh sheath to put that in,” Isabelle offered. “I’ve got tons.” “ABSOLUTELY NOT,” said Simon.
I’m actually laughing. Lol for real. What does this even mean? Is a thigh sheath too sexy or something? Simon, can you chill for .2 seconds? This isn’t your body. Let’s all take deep breaths.
Clary puts the dagger in the outside pocket of her backpack because there’s no way having to unzip a backpack to get to the dagger could bit her in the ass during a fight. Then Jace reaches over and undoes her hair bc, uh, shipping moment.
I’m so grossed out by the fact that in a short while, they will think they’re siblings.
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