#those of the clones who fall for their jedi
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I'm only referring to the story told by George Lucas (i.e. not Legends or the Disney stuff he was uninvolved with), because I wasn't sure what you were referring to, and because it's gradually becoming the only one I really care for these days. Legends has been decanonized for years now, and while I'll acknowledge that the Disney stuff is official canon, I'm not obligated to ignore how parts of it (i.e. stuff written by Filoni and Headland) are wildly inconsistent with Lucas's story in regards to the Jedi (this goes for the inconsistent parts of Legends too).
If you want to do otherwise, that's fine. If you think those inconsistencies make for a better story, well, fair enough. But again, I'm under no obligation to ignore something being inconsistent with its source material. Especially when the inconsistencies in question relate to parts of the source material I actually like.
In answer to your question, in my mind, what prevents the abuses - at least in Lucas's works and those written by people who actually understand how he wrote the Jedi - is simply that Lucas never wrote the Jedi as characters who would willingly commit their like. In terms of morality, they're on a similar level to Superman; the worst they do is get a little overconfident in their ability to detect and defeat the Sith by the time of the Prequels, and prove willing to compromise on their morals a little for the sake of protecting the Republic's people and soldiers when the Clone Wars begin.
(By "prove willing to compromise on their morals", I refer to the Jedi joining the war effort in the first place, Obi-Wan and the Jedi Council faking the former's death right in front of an ignorant Anakin, and the council tasking Anakin with spying on his close friend and confident in Palpatine. All these things came from a place with good intentions; you could argue that's just another way of saying "the greater good", but I personally think they're a world apart from forcing parents to give up their children in terms of morals).
(I suppose there's also how the council handled things with Ahsoka during the Wrong Jedi arc. I'm not sure precisely what the consequences would've been if they refused to hand her over to be tried as a Republic citizen, but if nothing else, Ahsoka didn't exactly look 100% innocent, and the Jedi had already had two of their number turn out to be Sith supporters (Dooku and Krell)).
Also, this might just be me making assumptions regarding your likely reaction to the above, but I'm also going to state that Yoda and Obi-Wan never told Luke to let his friends die on Bespin, nor did they plan to have him unknowingly kill his father. Yoda and Obi-Wan had no way of knowing what would happen to Luke's friends, but they did believe - not without reason - that Luke wouldn't be able to do much to help them with his miniscule amount of Jedi training if he just flew off to Cloud City. As for killing Vader, it's a plot point that Luke risks falling to the dark side if he does so out of anger and/or a desire for revenge, under which I'd argue "avenging his father" could quite easily fall. My guess is that Yoda and Obi-Wan planned to explain the truth to him when he was wise enough to handle it, but of course Luke's recklessness and Vader himself put the kibosh on that plan.
tl;dr: Writing the Jedi as the kind of people who'd forcibly take children against their parents' will was likely never the intention of Lucas.
When a Jedi takes in a child, it's kidnapping. But when a Mandalorian does it, it's a foundling.
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Cody: Are my feelings for General Kenobi real or just a side-effect of having been made for the Jedi? Best to assume it's the latter and not do anything about it.
Cody, two minutes after meeting Anakin: Kriff, I'm definitely in love with my General.
#i was made for the jedi and this is the only jedi i'm in close contact with.#am i really dedicated to them as a person or would i feel the same way about any other jedi?#commander cody#codywan#i do wonder if they angst about this#those of the clones who fall for their jedi#not!fic
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i am once again feeling unwell over clone troopers
#my roman empire#their creation was the product of a manufactured war. raised to be soldiers from the moment they decanted#taught to be weapons and to be nothing but means to an end and then shipped into the unknown#learning about the word 'brother'. slowly finding their individuality and a name for themselves. finally getting to a battleground#and soon learning the pain and grief and price of victory. seeing those same brothers fall and die and scream in agony#and then shoving it down because 'thats what good soldiers do'. being treated as real people for the first time by the Jedi#the ones on the pedestal and actual worth. the Jedi who take blasterfire to protect their men when they were taught it should be viceversa#those Jedi and their younglings (who also found themselves soldiers in this war despite not being bred for it)that fought and bled with the#and then were exterminated at the clones own hands#and for what? an empire that treated them like numbers and got rid of them the second they were no longer useful. and what is left??#when all they know is war how do you dream a future?? when you were meant to die or fight. how do you live after??#leona blogs#clone troopers#star wars the clone wars#star wars
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POV: you wake up in the middle of your own autopsy with force powers then immediately get brainwashed into falling to the dark side
I was reminded of the fact that I haven’t drawn inquisitor!fives’ autopsy scars in way too long so here I am, delivering a few too many Fives 💀
Anyway I know I don’t post much about the AU on here so props to anyone who knows what’s going on here even slightly, I’ve decided to nerf siren!echo (who WAS part of this AU yes I know quite random) but since him being turned into a siren kinda limits what I can do with him story wise he is now an AU of the AU.
That means the name I came up with for the au (dead mean walking/swimming or dmw(s) as I’ve been tagging it) is kinda irrelevant. I’ll just call this the inquisitor fives AU but if you have any AU name suggestions feel free to drop them.
Here are some of the major factors of the AU:
It gets worse before it gets better
(WARNING: there are quite a few heavy topics covered in the AU such as torture, dehumanisation and su*cidal thoughts, so pls read at your own discretion)
- fives wakes up in the middle of his own autopsy with force sensitivity, then gets brainwashed into falling to the Dark Side by Palpatine. As an Inquisitor, he does not remember anything about his life because those memories were blocked by Palpatine.
- Palpatine discovers that Fives is essentially immortal, and any injuries inflicted on him will heal no matter how bad.
- when echo gets rescued from skako minor, he is recalled to Kamino for experimentation, first of all so they can figure out what the Techno Union did to him, second of all to see how he survived his injuries. Nala se, who knows that fives came back to life, theorises that since he and echo were tube twins they share the “immortality”. He is kept on Kamino for VERY extensive experimentation where terrible things happen to him (cough vivisection cough lobotomy) and so never joins Clone Force 99 even if he did work with them on Anaxes.
- Fives in this time is sent out on many missions by Palpatine that involve him unaliving many people, and after the rise of the Empire he hunts a few Jedi.
- Fox, who throughout the war had experienced many blackout missions where he woke up afterwards covered in blood, is the last living Coruscant Guard commander. (Thorn dies, stone vanishes one day, Thire mistakes Vader for a Jedi and pays the price) Despite the best efforts of his son secretary Dogma (no way!?) Fox has very little will to live, is extremely depressed and borderline suicidal, he would like nothing more than to bite the dust, but still feels he has a duty to the very few remaining corries and so tries to keep it together (he is failing)
- one day Palpatine decides he doesn’t need Fox to do his bidding anymore since he has much better assets at his disposal (Fives), and decides it would be ironic to sic his pet clone inquisitor onto Fox. Fives still doesn’t remember anything, and only knows that Fox is responsible for the main scars on his body and believes fox is the reason he doesn’t remember most of his life, and so sets out to kill fox. They battle it out (ref to that one animation wip I posted) and fives is on the verge of killing fox (who didn’t really try to fight that much, like I said he would very much like to die and dying at the hand of the vod he “killed” seems fitting to him) when he gets a sudden vision of echo.
- all fives knows is echo is extremely important to him and must be rescued and that snaps him out of palpatine’s control. He knows he probably can’t rescue echo alone, and since fox has already been betrayed by the empire he decides “fuck it” and basically kidnaps fox and they run. They make a deal, that once echo has been found, Fives will put Fox out of his misery (fox feels that fives should be the only person to kill him, and only goes along with the plan because he refuses to let anyone else kill him)
- fox and fives proceed to go on an intergalactic road trip to “rescue echo” even though neither of them know how to do that. They become closer friends throughout, and fives slowly regains bits and pieces of the Before
- meanwhile during the destruction of Kamino, the bad batch stumble on echo and rescue him and he stays with them for a little bit before leaving with Rex
- meanwhile Dogma helps the rest of the remaining Corries desert, kills too many storm troopers, and tries to go after his buir fox and the bastard inquisitor who kidnapped him
This is the main stuff you need to know for the AU haha so if you’ve got new name suggestions I’m all ears ty!!
#dmw(s)#back in black AU#dead men walking AU#my art#star wars#star wars the clone wars#the clone wars#star wars art#star wars tcw#sw tcw#tbb echo#arc trooper echo#star wars au#inquisitor fives#inquisitor#force sensitive fives#fox and fives#tcw fives#clone trooper fives#arc trooper fives#fives#star wars alternate universe#clone wars fanart#star wars clone wars#clone wars#clone wars au#commander fox#domino twins
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Now if Mace went back. Then I genuinely think that one AU about Mace Windu going back and becoming Anakin's master would happen, I can't remember who that belongs to but like it's well accounted for. Mace would try to step in, as he wanted to in that one comic panel I've seen where he's like I don't like how we are letting Anakin get groomed actually >:/. Unless I conjured that in a dream
The idea that if post redemption Anakin was sent back he'd do anything besides trying to work out how to take down Palpatine without disrupting the timeline enough to prevent Luke and Leia's birth... I'm sorry, Obi-Wan would be a major factor in Anakin's wider plans, but he himself wouldn't be priority... which is WAY more interesting to me, how would Obi-Wan handle not being the center of Anakin's world with little explanation and combined with strange behavior? I picture him going to the council with his concerns, but them being, not approving of Anakin, never that, but amenable to the changes in his attitude. Yoda tells him to support these improvements, and if Anakin suggests any less than warm feelings for the senator, great, they'd rather he not be in the man's pocket anyway (even if they do keep sending him to visit the man privately like responsible jedi who care for child safety). I'd like to see someone write how Obi-Wan handles that. Because I truly don't see Anakin trusting him with his knowledge of the future, and I do think Obi-Wan would be shaken to have love-monster, validation-hungry padawan Anakin suddenly cool on him overnight and focus on... Idk it would depend on what Anakin's plan would hinge on, and I don't think he'd blow his chance to right things by being a toddler and running straight at the sith lord guns blazing, I think he was a powerful opponeny both as Vader and Anakin, and not just for sheer strength.
Anyway. Here's to an ANH-compliant ambivalent-to-Obi-Wan time traveling Anakin and a confused and suspicious younger Obi-Wan grappling with that
#mine#star wars#again:#this is stream of consciousness so. dont kill me (stupid thing to say to star wars fans who will kill me for less)#anakin skywalker#star wars prequels#sw#but also if this happens#i imagine mace would take a stronger hand in the clone wars which he would still allow to happen but he would work with certain jedi he#somewhat trusts to start disabling the chips in brains. and also he would not let obi-wan come anywhere NEAR anakin frankly#like i think obi-wan would still develop a bit of an obsession with anakin but this time it would be#because his master made him swear to be anakins master and mace not only denies him that but WEIRDLY refuses to let the two even interact#and the council doesnt understand it either and i think gets divided between#those who think mace is too attached and those who think obi-wan is too attached. with more falling into the latter#but mace's arguments against letting anakin see palpatine would push some into the former tbh#and obi-wan would try to accept this decision but would also try to justify his own behavior in secretly subtly trying to engage with anaki#bc since he didnt HAVE to be perfect jedi exemplar now as anakins master he doesnt have the same uptight fixation on not reaching out#even if his demeanor and sensitivity is still rude as hell and trying for indifference#but hed be sloppier about it. imo#obi-wan who isnt anakins master would actually be. arguably weirder about anakin than canon obi-wan.#especially if they still served together in the clone wars#like. less fixated but more weird. cant explain it.#thats my brothersoninheritance but you robbed me and now i have to seek to right things much as i can w quick glances and stolen words#very. very 2nd/8th + 3rd/9th house vibes where canon obi-wan is very 3d/9th + 4th/10th house#not to be astrological about fiction. again
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I have started to think of the Jedi being blamed for the Fall of the Republic like blaming firefighters for wildfires.
They have been fighting fires (corruption) for years, but the fire is getting bigger and hotter and spreading farther. They're doing their best but there aren't enough of them to go everywhere there are fires. The Senate points them to where really big fires are, but sometimes it turns out they just want their property saved and there weren't that many people in the building. The Jedi still save lives but they have to look at the bigger picture and hope volunteers will put out the little fires because they simply don't have the people for every little fire even though they wish they did. The Senate starts restricting their use of water. Then an arsonist, Palpatine, is made mayor and takes control of their budget.
Dooku and the CIS start lighting fires on purpose. Palpatine let's Dooku know where the most flammable places are.
And the firefighters (Jedi) keep fighting the fire. They can't not fight the fire. People will die if they don't fight the fire. Then the government is like: there are not enough firefighters to fight the fire, but here is a large population of people we will force to fight the fire with you. You shouldn't have qualms, apparently an individual that used to work for you is the one that paid for their training so really they're your responsibility. You'll be in charge of them on the field and get to watch them die, but we control their lives and have decided they're not people so we don't have to pay them. Good deal. We are good at fighting fires.
And the Jedi can't say no because they need to stop the fire and they can't do it alone at this point. Many of the Jedi are killed in their attempts to stop the gasoline fire Dooku lights and it shows how badly they need these new people.
Luckily, the people drafted to fight with them, the clones are also good at fighting fires! It's dangerous many clones will die, but despite having no choice they stand beside the Jedi bravely. The Jedi do everything in their power to protect them. They fight alongside them and try to minimize loss.
There are a few Jedi that get overwhelmed by anger or trauma. They become arsonists themselves, but the number of those that do can be counted on one hand compared to the thousands of Jedi that continue to fight fires.
Sadly, the clones have explosives inside them that Palpatine, the mayor, has the trigger for. Just when it feels like the fire is under control and the people lighting the fires have been stopped, Palpatine sets them off.
Most of the clones are never the same. They think the Jedi had to have set off the bombs inside them, even though they would have never thought them capable of it before. Most never learn the truth. They hate the Jedi for being traitors.
Most of the firefighters die. And their families too. Their children and uncles and aunts and grandparents, and cousins even if they weren't capable of fighting fires they all get burned to death.
The mayor declares it was the firefighters lighting fires and outlaws being a firefighter.
Some of the Jedi survive. Some of them can't bring themselves to fight fires anymore. Some of them keep doing it because it's what they were trained to do. A lot of them are novices who didn't know all the best techniques, but they find their own methods to put out fires and teach others how to do it as well.
And the rebellion begins because when you see fire the logical thing to do is put it out, but all the firefighters are dead or in hiding and being a firefighter is illegal. There's no one to call so the town's people start doing it themselves, inspired by the Jedi.
This becomes extremely important when the mayor makes a device that can light entire cities on fire at the push of a button.
Anyway that's my metaphor and maybe explains my point of view when it comes to the Jedi.
#jedi#jedi order#order 66#emperor Palpatine#jedi positive#the clone wars#star wars pt#star wars prequels#ymmv#child death mention
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The Kaminoans really called the Jedi a cult while they mass produced living/sentient beings, labeled them as usable property, and hated it when they stepped out of line or expressed themselves in any way.
#the clone wars#they were so fucked in the head lol#and the empire killed them off and left the rest broke anyway looooool#the jedi have fallen but all those who spoke and acted against them shall fall too ☺️💖💖
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I love the clone wars trio bc I see them all as different commentaries on the Jedi of the time.
Obi Wan is what the Jedi were.
Anakin is what the Jedi preached against.
Ahsoka is what the Jedi should aspire to be.
Obi Wan had the best of intentions: he wanted to save Anakin, to save Satine, to save Ahsoka. But in the end he failed due to Sith scheming. He was set up to fail, wether it be his dead master or the intergalactic war he was forced to fight in. And in the end Anakin did fall from the light, Satine was killed in Maul's quest for revenge, and Ahsoka walked away. He was a well-intentioned man with a good heart who was ultimately set up to fail by the Sith.
Anakin too wanted safety for his loved ones, but he took it to far. Instead of prioritizing those people, their wants and needs, he prioritized the way they made him felt. Instead of selfless love, he loved selfishly, which is exactlaly what the Jedi are against. They're not against love, they're against attachment. Anakin couldn't let go of Ahsoka: it corroded his faith in the Jedi, sowed seeds of resentment. He couldn't accept that Padme or Obi Wan didn't agree with his vision, because if they don't make him feel good, then they no longer love him. Anakin was a kind boy twisted by the Sith and his misguided attachment to others.
Ahsoka falls into a similar category as Obi Wan, except for one detial. She walked away. She recognized that the Jedi were unintentionally loosing themselves in war. And even through she was a spectacular warrior, a talented commander, she recognized that it wasn't supposed to be her job. She was able to let go of her attachment to Anakin and the 501st. She was a product of her masters and friends, of Obi Wan, Anakin, Padme, and all the others who influenced her growth. And even in the end, when her world fell, she still acted with compassion and understanding, which is exactly what a Jedi should be. Despite her discomfort with the twisted meaning of the title, Ahsoka embodied the fundamental traits of a Jedi. Not flawless, but an empathetic peacekeeper capable of embracing love and rejecting attachment.
Idk if I'm articulating it right, but the general idea is there.
#this just applies to clone wars-era versions though#because once you go past that their characters become more focused on other ideas#just my ideas on it#ramblings#my thoughts#star wars#tcw#ahsoka tano#501st battalion#anakin skywalker#obi wan kenobi#sith#the clone wars#satine kryze#darth maul#padme amidala#palpatine#darth sidious#star wars clone wars#star wars thoughts#star wars prequels#star wars the clone wars#sw
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Buddy, there's more to love than just romantic love. Detachment doesn't mean "no bonds whatsoever". It means you don't obsessively cling to those bonds to the detriment of all involved. Like, the Jedi in the prequels talk about how the Force connects everyone together, and you think they DON'T forge bonds with the people around them? We even see all of them (except Anakin and a one-off fallen Jedi) form bonds with the Clones.
If they forbade love and emotions the way you claim, Obi Wan would NOT be allowed to have friends outside of the Order. Indeed EVERY Jedi has connections and bonds that go beyond their Order.
They don't even begrudge people who leave the order to get married if that's what they feel their calling is.
In fact, I'd argue Riku in canon would make for a GREAT Jedi (post KH2, at least). Because he, unlike Anakin, is willing to let go of Kairi for her own good.
Riku in Days and early KH2, however, acts a LOT like a Sith when he falls back into bad habits out of desperation. (With his Manga counterpart even betraying and abandoning Namine once she's outlived her usefulness to him.) Not helping matters is DiZ encouraging and enabling his worst habits as part of his revenge scheme.
And you're the one who came out swinging with "Anakin's crimes were actually the Jedi's fault". Again, his own hedonism and clinginess was his downfall. Saying it was the Jedi's rules that caused him to fall would be like if he burned his hand by touching a stove the Jedi told him not to touch and you turned around and blamed the Jedi for it.
Heck, the Jedi didn't even care that he had a secret wife for Pete's sake (being, at worst, exasperated with his antics), because, as far as they were aware, it wasn't hurting anyone. It's only when he MURDERED CHILDREN instead of taking Padme to a medical professional that they had a problem with him. (Given that deleted scenes had Padme forming what would soon become the Rebel Alliance, one gets the impression she'd rather Anakin had let her possibly die in childbirth than genocide the Jedi.)
Anakin's Attachments lead to him acting like Riku in KH1, but with FAR more permanent consequences for himself and his victims. Just as Maleficent exploited Riku's Attachment to Kairi to isolate him from his loved ones and drive him deeper into darkness.
Unlike Anakin, however, Riku hadn't YET fallen to the point that he'd murder Kairi over a perceived slight when she's finally saved by Sora, which is why nobody writes him off as being beyond saving after the events of Hollow Bastion (unlike in Star Wars canon, where Obi Wan and Yoda are convinced Anakin is too far gone after he personally helps destroy democracy and murdered their surrogate family whom had gone against their own traditions to raise him).
Healthy bonds and connections are good and necessary, which the Jedi understand and encourage. Possessive attachment, on the other hand, is what they forbid.
Okay but, I think it would be funny if Star Wars were to appear in Kingdom Hearts, because Star Wars very much strictly adheres to "light is good, dark is evil" while Kingdom Hearts goes for "dark is dangerous, but not necessarily evil by default".
So like...
Imagine it leading to a lot of confusion until they eventually figure out the issue is just a difference in what's defined as Light or Dark.
The KH cast define Light and Dark based off of fundamental and natural forces in the universe.
In Star Wars, Light Side is how the Force is SUPPOSED to be used, while the Dark Side is a perversion of the Force that is inherently harmful.
This, hilariously enough, means that any Jedi who's especially attuned to the Light Side of the Force would probably have an easy time using the KH version of the powers of Darkness without fear thanks to their excellent self-control.
The Sith, meanwhile, would all be on the fast track to becoming mindless Heartless thanks to their LACK of self control and constantly indulging their worst impulses to self destructive degrees.
(Look at Kylo Ren in The Force Awakens and tell me with a straight face that he wouldn't become a Heartless during the final battle if he was using KH's darkness in addition to the Dark Side of the Force.)
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I like to imagine that in the future, people remember the clones. After Palpatine falls for good on Exegol, imagine an explosion of freedom and knowledge in those days after the final defeat: imagine archaeologists and scholars plumbing the depths of Imperial and First Order records, trying to figure out what had happened so it could never happen again. And through it all they find the clones’ story woven into everything, until a new field emerges of Clone Studies, a loose alliance of military history buffs and research biologists and anthropologists and ethicists.
They catalogue the Kaminoans’ research; they review the clone memorials on Coruscant, on Zeffo, monuments as large as a massive wall or as small as a quiet statue, from people throughout the galaxy who were grateful for what they did. They study the great tragedy and betrayal of the chip, finally understanding the scope of Palpatine’s plans and bringing them out into the open, sharing the truth that the clones never chose to betray the Jedi Order and Republic they had served faithfully. They study old war vids and oral histories from people of long-lived species or whose grandparents remembered the clones; they build, memory by memory, a sense of the culture, the camaraderie, the brotherhood, the loyalty. They collect vids of battle songs and in-jokes and an interior language shared among them, springing up over the years.
They find and list their names, self-chosen or given by their brothers: Rex, Fives, Howzer, Echo, Tup, Gregor, Wolffe, Cody, Boil, Waxer, Cut. They study the clones whose differences defined them and knit them into a family whose ties could not be broken, Hunter, Wrecker, Tech, Crosshair, Omega. They study the discarded who nevertheless still had value - 99, Emerie, the clones who were culled in infancy for being wrong. There are specialists who devote their entire branch of study to the only male unaltered clone and his infamous exploits throughout the galaxy, so alike his father’s. They study the years of the clone rebellion, a fight that paved the way for the next wave of fighters and the next after them.
The clones are gone. That is undisputed. Their kind came for a little while, and then vanished, burning brightly; their tale was a tragedy, but one unique in all its seeming sameness. There are conferences and holovids and books. There are debates and research firing up young scholars about a time only their great-grandparents can remember.
In the future, after all the clones are gone, there are still stories.
#the clones#clone wars#the clone wars#the bad batch#Star Wars#clone force 99#I’m just having feelings okay#Star Wars meta#clone wars meta#bad batch meta#clones
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Love your writing so much! Can you please do some separate headcanons of the bad batch who get assigned a female!general who’s super sweet and a total scaredy cat? Because of this, they’re SUPER protective (and jealous) of their dear general, especially when it comes to other regs! And of course as time passes, they begin to develop a crush on her
Hello! Of course I can! :p
[The Bad Batch x Jedi!fem!reader (headcanons)]: "I could never choose to love another"
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Summary:
In which the Bad Batch member you're in love with falls for you too.
TRIGGER WARNINGS: protective Batch, jealousy, fluff, mild mentions of Crosshair having a panic attack, and that's pretty much it. Not proofread.
Enjoy!
A/N: Thank you <3 and I hope you enjoy your request!
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HUNTER:
When Hunter first heard of becoming a general's squadron, he couldn't believe it. He and his brothers had been rejected by the Republic (in general), and suddenly, someone wants five clones on their squad? Unbelievable.
However, Hunter knew you were different when you first showed up and tripped over your own Jedi robe, got up, smiled and extended a hand to him. There was something in your eyes that made you different from the rest of the Jedi.
The more time he spent with you, the more time he got to meet you. At first, it was the usual jokes to break the ice; usual, playful banter; calm nights talking to his brothers... That's when Hunter saw your sweet side. There's a point where he started calling you by your real name whenever you were alone.
He literally became your protector, keeping you out of trouble whenever he could, avoiding food cantina fights so that you wouldn't get hurt, etc. He knows you can defend yourself, but there was always something that made him protective over you and his brothers.
Another reason you gave Hunter to be more protective over you was the fact that you got scared pretty easy. And, cherry on top, whenever Hunter saw you with regs, he'd become jealous and probably try to get you away from the regs as much as possible.
He didn't make it super obvious, of course. Then, he realised he might have fallen for you. However, he knew it was unprofessional, so he'd keep it to himself.
Though, he could not hide the slight blush that came over his face whenever you teasingly brushed your fingers against his calloused hands.
ECHO:
Now, Echo was happy his squad assigned to a new general. Ever since Skako Minor, he felt like the Republic had done little to nothing to try make him feel normal again. However, he was insecure about his general seeing him and rejecting him in some way.
Nonetheless, he immediately fell for you when he saw your bright smile, as your eyes came in contact with his.
Unlike Hunter, who took a long time to realise he had fallen for someone, Echo had the love-at-first-sight type of problem and he swore he'd keep it to himself. It was unprofessional and you were his general.
He found it endearing to see how scared you were of basically everything: bugs, surprise hugs, animals... However, that did not stop him from blushing every time you jumped in surprise and held his shoulders for support.
He's definitely protective over you, but he knows you can handle things. He trusts you completely and knows you won't get in trouble. He's not possessive nor jealous in any way (he's too sweet to be possessive).
Yet, he still feels a bit jealous when you prefer talking to the regs and sometimes will try to make a friendly conversation so as to keep you with him.
Again, Echo knows what he's doing. He knows he shouldn't confess to a person that's a higher rank than him.
But, his face turns red when your hands rest on his waist for a few seconds.
WRECKER:
Let's all be honest, Wrecker does not care who you are, as long as you like hugs. Because Wrecker gives lots of those.
When he first saw you arm wrestling a reg and you won, this man was ready to spar with you for the rest of his life. You were also very nice and polite.
I reckon Wrecker laughs when you get scared. Though, he does become serious and protective when there's something truly menacing happening.
He will not be bothered to beat up any reg if they're disrespectful or just mean. You're one of his only friends besides his brothers, and he feels the need to protect you.
He found out he was probably in love with you because 1) He asked Tech, and 2) He felt something pleasant in his stomach whenever you laughed.
Wrecker won't hesitate to show his love for you: whether it's by hugging, congratulate you for anything you do, let you sleep with his tooka doll...This man is not ashamed of showing how much he loves you.
He knows he shouldn't date someone in the middle of the war, but he can't help but hug you from behind and wishing you good luck whenever you go on a mission that's not with them.
TECH:
At first, Tech did not care who you were. To him, you were just another Jedi general. He hadn't heard from you, so he thought you'd want Clone Force 99 for their strength and not their personality.
Tech didn't pay much attention to you at first. But, one day, he started rambling about hyperdrives and noticed you listening. You were paying full attention and he couldn't help but blush a little.
This smart clone will be a tad surprised at how much of a scaredy cat you are. Maybe, you'll receive a comment or two from Tech, though they are harmless.
This is one of the reasons why Tech became overprotective. He started placing you behind him whenever something -or someone dangerous would happen to be there.
And, around the regs, Tech will get into a verbal fight whether they're mean or not. He registers the feeling he feels as jealous, and he will try anything to get rid of it.
That's when he realises that jealousy is laced with having feelings for someone. And he figured it was you since he felt jealousy when you were with other regs.
Tech knows he's risking his and your position if anything happened between your two, so he'll stick to telling you how beautiful you are through flowers.
CROSSHAIR:
Like Tech, Crosshair doesn't care either about who you are. He figures you didn't want to be a general for Clone Force 99 and you'd probably run away out of fear when you saw them.
At the sight of you, he couldn't deny you were beautiful. And he was genuinely surprised at you kindness, making him slightly fond of you the more time you two spent together.
Time passed, and he hated you for making him feel weird stuff on his stomach, yet he admired your sweetness towards anyone you met. This made you naive, but also endearing.
Cross will mock you for being a scaredy cat, but in reality, he will become more protective of you. Whenever a reg approached you, he was right behind you. He will listen what you are talking about, and, if things went bad, he will immediately come out of the shadows to protect you.
When he realises he's fallen for you, he tries to deny it and refuse to accept him. But the way you smile, the way you fight, and the way you are in general will keep him grounded.
There's a point where he won't deny it, and give subtle touches or a gentle nudge whenever he's around you.
Crosshair does not give a damn about the rules and the order, but he knows you'd risk everything, so he keeps his hands to himself most of the time (besides when he's doing the things from the prior paragraph).
However, the annoying butterflies will appear again when you stand opposite him whenever he's having a panic attack and you help him.
----
I hope you like it, anon :p
#the bad batch#star wars#bad batch#the bad batch x reader#star wars tbb#bad batch hunter#hunter the bad batch#tbb tech x reader#tbb#tbb wrecker x reader#tbb echo#tbb echo x reader#crosshair the bad batch#crosshair x reader#the bad batch headcanons
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Back to you
Hunter x Jedi!reader
Spoilers for the bad batch season 3 :)
Summary: After a long time, you're finally reunited with your family and your lover.
Warning: Canon violence, Mention of mental and physical torture, slight depressing state, hurt/comfort. Fluff!
A/N: Let me know if anyone would like part two. I was planning on making it spicy ;}
Word count: 2.4k
Part two
It's been months since you got a distress signal from one of your fellow surviving Jedi. Months since you managed to rescue your Jedi friend but sacrifice your own freedom. Months since you've seen your family and your lover.
The last thing you remember from when you were still with the batch was when you were all on Pabu, helping the people restore the beautiful ocean city while you were waiting to get any word from Echo as he helped Rex.
When the only thing missing was Crosshair.
You got the distress signal the same day Echo said he would visit. You knew you couldn't wait for your friend to visit, so with a tight hug, a long and loving kiss and a promise to return safely and quickly, you set the course for your Jedi friend.
Unfortunately, your plan wasn't Vader proof and you ended up captured, switching your place with your friend who managed to escape. You waited for your end, silently apologizing to Hunter and your family, but it never came. Instead, Darth Vader decided you would make a great addition to the imperial inquisitors, so they tried to break you, in every possible way.
For months, they tortured you mentally and physically, leaving you crying and barely alive at the end of every day. But you never broke, no matter what they did to you, you didn't break. There were times when it came close, but thinking of your batch and Hunter gave you strength to fight on.
So when the first opportunity to escape came, you took it. Doing everything in you capacity, even if it meant you'd have to tap into the dark side of the force. Your body had been weakened in the past months, your skin now covered in scars but that didn't stop you and you managed to escape, hijacking an imperial ship and running.
It seemed that even the force was on your side once you coincidentally run into Echo, Rex and the newly forming Clone resistance. But all your happiness disappeared once Echo informed you of the loss they suffered almost immediately you were gone. All those months, just the idea of coming back to your family and how everything would be perfect once again. Everything fell apart and you felt like you were once again in that cold prison cell, waiting for the inquisitors to torture you again. You were falling into the dark abyss, ashamed to even show yourself to Hunter and Wrecker.
It wasn't until Echo came looking for you, four days later. His body radiating happy energy as he practically jumped on you, hugging you and telling you that both Omega and Crosshair managed to escape and were now safely with Hunter and Wrecker on Pabu.
That made you hyperactive, filling you with energy and will to live and both you and Echo were in the ship only few hours later, crossing the galaxy to get back to your family once again.
Three days later you finally made it to Pabu, docking the ship at the top of the city. But while waiting for the ship to touch the ground in a matter of those seconds, your mind betrayed you. Suddenly all you wanted to do was to hide in the corner and dissappear, all those happy thoughts dissappeard, instead being replaced with dark and hateful thoughts. You imagined how Hunter must hate you now that you only returned once everything was alright again. How you dissappeard when they needed you the most. Maybe he's even blaming you for everything bad that happened to his family. Or maybe Omega's the one who hates you now, maybe she thinks that you betrayed them, leaving your family to help someone else.
Your whole body was shaking and you felt like you would faint and when the ramp finally began to descend and the sun shined on your face, Echo had to gently grab you because you swayed like a fragile flower in the wind.
Both you and Echo managed to take a few steps down the ramp before you heard a loud yell. Omega screamed yours and Echo's name, sprinting full speed at you, making you react the same. You yelled her name and she jumped in your arms as you quickly prepared to catch her, hugging her close to you as you began crying, peppering her face with kisses and petting her hair. You managed to crouch with Omega in front of you as you grabbed her cheeks and looked at her more closely, checking for any injuries as she cried telling you how much she missed you.
But as soon as Omegas eyes fell on your face her expression fell as well.
"What happened to your face!" Big tears began rolling down her cheeks as she looked at you. Similar to your body, your face was now littered with both small and big scars, some more visible than the others.
It's been months since you've seen Omega, the young female clone that had unexpectedly entered your life and become like a daughter to you. And after so long, you didn't want your scars to be the first thing you talk about, it was too dark subject to address in the first moments of reunion. So you moved your hands up to her hair, trying to change the subject to something happier.
"Look at your hair! It's grown so much!" You laughed through your tears as you played with the little girl's hair.
"I know, now you can finally braid my hair!" The young girl knew what your were trying to do and played along giggling as she mirrored your hands movements and played with your hair.
You were just about to respond when you both got interrupted by someone whispering your name. Your head snapped behind Omega, falling on a frozen figure, Hunter.
Your body went rigid, completely frozen in time when your eyes meet with his golden ones. Omegas eyes followed yours and once she saw Hunter standing there silently watching, she hugged you one last time before slowly removing herself from you and running towards waiting Echo.
Now that Omega was no longer in front of you, you stood up slowly, your eyes never leaving his as he watched your every move like he couldn't believe you were really there.
Your hands began shaking again and you grabbed your sleeves to try and stop them but to no avail.
"Hunter?"
You whispered back to him, taking a small step towards him. He said nothing, but his body moved and he was by you in the next second, his hands enveloping your body as his own crashed against yours. He squeezed you almost as hard as he could, fearing that if he wouldn't, you would've disappeared again. Hunter buried his face in your neck, inhaling your scent as your hands slowly stopped shaking and you moved them up into his hair. Your forehead fell on his shoulder as you finally closed your eyes, taking in his warm presence. You both stood there for a long minute, not moving as you both tried to soak in each other's warmth.
You felt Hunter deeply inhale once again, his breath tickling your neck, before his lips pressed against the same spot and he kissed you. Repeating the movement kissing up your neck, slowly coming to your face as his hands moved up to your neck, and his thumbs landed on your cheeks as his eyes found yours again. Hunter breathed out your name again, his face so close to yours.
"I thought I lost you..." His normally smoky voice sounded broken, quiet, like he was worried he would scare you away if he'd talk any louder. His own hands began to shake slightly as he gently turned your face around, his eyes jumping from scar to scar.
"Hunter, I'm so sorry. I tried to get back to you, I really did but they-" You tried explaining yourself as his eyes found yours again.
"When your ship returned I thought to myself at least I got one of my girls back...but then only General Prima came out and she could barely look me in the eyes to tell me what happened..." Hunter let out a sigh as his thumb traced the scar across your lips.
"...I thought I lost you and I couldn't bare to even think of what they're doing to you...I tried get you back every day, you and Omega..." He went on slowly and quietly, his other thumb tracing the scar across your eye.
"I'm so sorry Hunter-" You tried to apologise again but he interrupted you again with his thumb on your lips.
"Just...just promise me to never leave me again...I...I can't live without you." Hunter whispered as one tear left his eye and you moved your hand to his cheek, brushing it away as he leaned into your touch.
"I promise Hunter, never again." You nodded your head as you promised him, your own tears escaping you again and you moved your head, leaning your forehead against his.
Hunter let out a gentle puff of air, making your lips tingle as the air hit them. His own lips ghosting over yours as he whispered. "Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner ka'ra."
A small smile appeared on your lips and you gently nodded. "Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum ner ashi dul."
You responded and finally moved, pressing your lips against his into a long and loving kiss.
Hunter's hands moved back down to your waist and he pulled you closer again as his kiss turned more desperate.
Your own hands moved around his neck as you pulled yourself impossibly closer, a small sound escaping you as Hunters hand squeezed your hip and he took the chance to deepen the kiss. His tongue prodded against your lips as he entered your mouth in almost like urgent matter.
You let him take the reins and followed his tempo, enjoying the feeling of his arms around you again.
"Okay, you can continue doing that later! Now it's my turn!" You heard Wrecker before another set of arms snaked around you and Hunter, squeezing you even further and lifting you in the air. Both you and Hunter gasped, breaking the kiss to look at the gentle giant as he hugged you, leaning his head on your shoulders. You chuckled, grinning and squeezing one arm out and moving it to gently pat Wreckers head. "I missed you too Wrecker." Even Hunter managed a chuckle as he heard his brother sniffle quietly.
"We're never splitting ever again." Wrecker decided as he slowly put them down and brushed the tears from his eyes away. "Agreed." You nod, grabbing the giant clone's hand and squeezing it.
"What, no hug for me?" Crosshair's sly snake like voice asked as he came closer and crossed his arms in front of his chest an amused frown on his face. Your head turned in his direction and a wide smile grew on your lips and you gently let go of Wrecker and moved around Hunter, letting your hands to drag across his chest as you stepped closer to his youngest brother. "Crosshair!" You grinned and quickly moved closer to him, enveloping him into a big hug. Your movement surprised him greatly as he was expecting a glare and a witty remark instead you hugged him.
His arms were awkwardly waiting at his sides, debating if he should hug you back or push you away. Alas, you were the only one that hugged him so far and he'd be lying to himself if he'd say he didn't need a hug. So he let his arms slowly sneak around your body and he hugged you back, silently laying his head on top of yours.
"I'm glad you're back with us again." You whispered just loud enough for him to hear and you felt his breath hitch.
He slowly let go of you and stepped back a little, watching the scars across your face.
"Come on, you have to meet Batcher!" Omega gasped, grabbing your hand out of nowhere and pulling you towards what looked to be a excited Lurca hound, running around and chasing Moon-yos. You chuckled at the enthusiasm of the little girl and looked back behind you to your lover and the rest of your family, only to see Hunter slightly glaring at Crosshair and Echo rolling his eyes and pushing the former Sergeant, encouraging him to move, while Wrecker only laughed and followed closely.
Omega managed to introduce you to the lively hound, telling you how she helped her and how they bonded over the time as they managed to survive the empire. Batcher seemed to be the perfect energetic pet for Omega as they began playing together, almost forgetting everyone else that was watching them.
You felt a warm hand on the small of your back and a moment later a warm body pressed against your side as Hunter lowered his head to whisper in your ear. "Come on, you must be starving." He pressed a delicate kiss to your forehead as you turned your head to look at him. "A little, yeah." You confirmed and Hunter motioned with his head to his brothers, before gently pushing you towards the house reserved for the batch.
Hunter whistled, making Omegas and Batchers heads turn, motioning them to follow too.
The shining sun had slowly began to descend as they sat down around the table after they put on some food. They snacked on the delicious fruits, talking about everything, just like they did in the old days, while they watched Omega and Batcher play.
The moment felt perfect, besides the one empty chair, remaining everyone that they will never be complete again. Everything else felt normal, Crosshair's witty remarks, Wrecker's compliments to the food, Echo trying to talk about another one of his missions and Hunter silently trying to listen to everyone as his hand slowly fell on your thigh, giving it a gentle squeeze to reassure you and himself that this moment is in fact real.
Translation:
Ni kar'tayli gar darasuum - Mandalorian way of saying "I love you"
Ner ka'ra - My star
Ner ashi dul - My other half
#sergeant hunter x reader#sergeant hunter#hunter tbb#tbb hunter fluff#tbb hunter x reader#the bad batch#clone troopers#star wars#tbb season 3#tbb spoilers#omega tbb#tbb crosshair#tbb wrecker#tbb echo#tbb rex#fluff
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Sun-hearted
[ao3] Anakin Skywalker is not human. The people around him try not to think about it.
----
Shmi had always known her son wasn’t like her.
At first, she had assumed that the pregnancy had simply happened without her knowledge. Or that perhaps her mind had blocked out the event — a slave knew better than anyone how the brain killed the past to protect the present, to keep you surviving.
But the more she tried to dig up the memory-that-wasn’t-there, the more she ran through scenarios, the more she realised that nothing that made sense. If it had been… any of her theories, she would have known, there would have been evidence, Watto wouldn’t have been so angry when he found out. Eventually, she realised she had to give up logic alltogether. Anakin’s father was not something knowable to her. He (it?) had been something else. Something impossible.
A miracle.
The theory only grew more convincing as her pregnancy progressed. She began to sense things no human should have been able to. Objects falling before they’d even been knocked. Watto’s bad mood from two rooms away. Her baby’s strong soul, loudly proclaiming it would be a survivor.
She held her new sixth sense dear for those nine months she had it — but not as dearly as she held her baby boy, to whom the sense really belonged. Her darling miracle baby boy, who always knew too much too soon, who read intentions as easily as he read schematics, and whose quick hands and quicker mind did the impossible on Boonta Eve.
Slaves were supposed to cling to their miracles, so few and far between as they were. But a mother was supposed to do what was best for her son, and Anakin was her boy above all else. She let him go, hoping the Jedi would understand and care for his impossibility better than she ever could.
(And as Shmi died, she did not need Anakin’s sixth sense to feel the anger running through his miracle veins. She did not need it to know what would happen next, either.
She knew with all the certainty her slow-beating heart had that her son’s grief would raze the galaxy to ash.)
—
Obi-Wan knew Anakin didn’t fit in with the other younglings and padawans.
He wanted to believe it was just because of the boy’s upbringing, that it was only because he’d grown up in a much crueler, realer world to the others. Or perhaps it was because Anakin was already a padawan or because of how annoyingly easily it was for him to call the Force. Maybe they just heard the Council had tried to reject him. There seemed to be a few hundred thousand reasons that the children of the Temple would consider him an outsider — but one stood out like a sore and mythical thumb.
There was no Chosen One or such thing as a child born of the Force. There was certainly no chance that the other children (even the ones who tried to accept Anakin with open arms) could sense otherness in his blood. He was just like any other Jedi, if a little more reckless.
As Anakin and the other padawans grew, they grew together. He became like well-sewn patch on an old shirt — the difference was there, yes, but only noticeable if you were really looking. It was better for everyone if Obi-Wan stopped looking for the gap, so he did.
Anakin had never seemed to notice it, anyway.
(And as he watched Anakin’s slaughter of the Temple, the hot drowning of dread and horror and nausea was joined by a cold, parasitic realisation. The gap between Anakin and the other Jedi had never grown smaller; Obi-Wan had only grown more blind.
Jedi were taught from a young age that they could not hold or control the Force, that they were to let it flow freely else they would face the consequences. Obi-Wan had been a fool to think that something made of one half Force and one half heartbreak could be held any more than its parent.)
—
Anakin grinned, and Ahsoka felt every clone in the hangar’s mood lift. Ahsoka couldn’t help but smile in return — and then he cracked a joke, and the worry and grief of the battle became a distant, shrouded memory.
It always went like this. They came back from the latest campaign dirtied, injured, and with a tiredness that ached into their very bones. They all wanted nothing more than to eat and sleep and mourn and not talk to anyone for several hours. But then Anakin — still riding the high of a good fight — would clap Ahsoka on the shoulder, make a stupid comment to Rex, and everything would feel fine. Better than fine even.
Morale seemed so reliant on him that if her master was angry or sad or upset, so was the entire ship. When he was in a mood, meditation became impossible, no matter how at peace Ahsoka felt. She once considered that it was more than just moral, more than just his stupid jokes, but she had grown up in the Temple, raised on lessons of a Jedi’s few limits. A single man could not project his emotions onto an army.
Anakin just had a friendly smile, was all.
(And when Maul told her — warned her — of what her master would become, she did not listen. She could not listen. She thought only of his grin, and the sunny sureness in her chest that always accompanied it.
And so she fought for it again.)
—
Rex knew, theoretically, that General Skywalker was human.
He’d seen enough medical scans from Kix (on the unusual occasion that the general submitted to care) to know that Skywalker’s biology was just like any natborn human’s. He didn’t have strange-coloured blood or an extra eye and all his (mostly-intact) organs were in the right places. The records showed that he was completely, one-hundred-percent human.
Theoretically, this made complete sense.
And it made sense he would seem slightly off. Rex had spent the first decade of his life surrounded entirely by his brothers and Kaminoan scientists; his idea of a ‘normal’ person was someone who looked and sounded identical to him, not a tall, barely-tanned Tatooinian with the wrong accent. Even if it hadn’t been, Rex knew Jedi were different from your average natborn. They could do all these crazy things that belonged in storybooks and myths, not the battlefield. Swaying people, moving objects (or clone captains) with their minds, seeing the future — if Rex hadn’t been trained to do so, he wouldn’t have believed a word of it.
But if being a Jedi had been the reason, wouldn’t Rex have noticed the same thing with Commander Tano or General Kenobi? He understood that maybe Commander Tano wasn’t old enough to develop whatever it was General Skywalker had — but Kenobi was older, more trained in the Force. Surely Rex would have noticed the same thing, that same surely-not-quite-human feeling with him?
Maybe he just spent too much time around the General. Maybe this thinking was just a part of having a good natborn friend.
He hoped it was, at least.
(And when Rex heard of the attack on the Temple, he understood his hope was for naught.
He and his brothers weren’t an isolated incident, he knew; Ahsoka had felt the deaths across the galaxy. He had no doubt the clones on the battlefield cut down their generals — who trusted them like they trusted their own right hand, who stood alone in front of a one-thousand strong army — with an alarming ease.
But he heard reports of the Temple, of blue-painted clones massacring all there, and knew they couldn’t have done it alone. Only one Jedi was strong enough to take on a Temple of their own kind and win.)
—
Padmé wondered if her husband was made from the stars themselves.
It seemed like the only explanation, sometimes. How could anything mortal be so beautiful? How could anything born on solid ground hold that much love in its heart? He was impossible. He looked her in the eye and saw right through every mask she wore, saw that all she was at the core was an overworked girl from Naboo — and still beamed like she was the most perfect thing in the galaxy. He loved her for who she was, not what she could do for him nor for the stature of Amidala. That seemed rarer than stardust.
She would see him and her breath would catch with something that had to be more than love. He stood by the window and stared into the Coruscanti night like he could hear every thought in the city-planet, his golden-brown hair catching the edges of the hundred-colour lights. She ought to walk up to him, hold him, tell him she loves him and pepper him with kisses — but all she could do was stare. In those moments, he was perfect and divine, and she could not interrupt them with her mortality.
(And as Padmé lay dying, her life force dragged out by some dark presence, she thought of her star-husband. And she thought of the refugees she had once helped when their sun imploded. It should have been a lesson learnt; stars were beautiful in the night sky, warm in the summer, but dangerous. Able to end entire planets in their own cosmic pain.
Some small part of her knew this when she first said I love you. But she could not listen. She saw only the star-beauty in his eyes and all the love he held in his sun-heart.)
—
Anakin Skywalker had long questioned whether he was human or not.
But as Darth Vader looked down at his mechanical hands, heard his pressurised breathing, and ignored the pain that followed his every half-sedated movement, he found his humanity was no longer a question.
#anakin skywalker#shmi skywalker#obi wan kenobi#ahsoka tano#captain rex#padme amidala#star wars#fic#total write forever
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Few Fates Worse Than Death
Pairing: Wrecker x fem!Reader / Wrecker x Jedi!Reader
Words: 13,780
Tags/Warnings: angst, hurt/comfort, canon-typical violence, platonic Rex x Reader, kissing, found family stuff so that makes it better right?
Summary: You refused to believe that Wrecker would ever hurt you, but on Bracca, his nightmare finally comes true.
A/N: I've written angst to some degree for every member of the squad except for Wrecker, so I decided to change that. This is the first and probably only time I pull quotes/scenes directly from the show for a one-shot.
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The moment Rex told you about the inhibitor chips, everything fell into place. A cold, icy dread filled you, even as the others insisted that the chips held no power over them. Everything that had happened since Kaller, since Crosshair and Master Billaba's men tried to kill you... you saw it all through a new lens, and the galaxy spun dizzyingly before you.
Like the others, you’d barely paid attention to Omega’s explanation of the chip. The idea that the Kaminoans put some sort of mind-altering device inside every clone was beyond the pale, so absurd that, even if it was true, you never thought to give it much attention. And Tech was so confident that his own research proved the chips had no such abilities. It was easier to trust Tech, who had always been honest and open with you, than to question your own instincts.
But Rex was different.
The others protested, but Rex had seen something, experienced it himself, and he wasn't willing to risk any of his brothers falling prey to it again. You can hear his fear in his voice, feel it radiating from him. His insistence that the chips be removed, one way or another, was unshakeable.
Rex looks over at you, as if expecting you to back him, but you can only look away.
You feel like you can't breathe, can't think. You take a step back and settle down on one of the barstools, your hand gripping the edge so tightly your knuckles are white. Your stomach churns with dread. What do you do? What can you do?
You’d felt it, the moment Jedi across the galaxy were cut down, like a thousand tiny shards of glass stabbing into your mind. The pain had been nearly blinding, and it had taken every bit of concentration you had to keep from screaming. But you hadn’t seen the images. Hadn’t witnessed the slaughter. That had been a mercy. You hadn't been there, hadn't seen them fall, but you still feel the echoes of their deaths in the Force, a dull, aching pain that never goes away.
The thought of what Rex had seen, what the other clones had experienced, sickens you. Being forced to witness the death of someone you care about is awful enough, but to see your own hand, your own blaster, murder the very people you are sworn to protect? You shudder, the horror of it too overwhelming to contemplate.
The others are talking now, and the argument is escalating. You watch them in a daze, barely able to focus. Your thoughts are running away with you, and you have to fight back against the urge to panic.
The clones were made to be obedient, but not this obedient. There was no way the Kaminoans, or the Jedi, or anyone would have created them with the ability to commit mass genocide at the push of a button. It couldn’t be real. It couldn't.
Could it?
"The chips make you a threat to everyone around you," Rex says, and it's like being doused in cold water. You stare up at him, wide-eyed, unable to speak.
Rex's jaw tightens. "You're all ticking time bombs."
And you realize then that he's right. Even if the inhibitor chips really do hold no influence over the clones, you can't ignore the potential threat they pose. Not after what happened on Kaller, the horror of it still fresh in your mind. You hadn’t been there after, but you’d heard what happened. If Crosshair had really wanted to kill those refugees, if his chip had made him turn on his brothers... how could the others be so sure their own wouldn’t do the same?
They're all still arguing with Rex, telling him he's wrong, but they don't understand. None of them understand.
Rex turns to you, and when he sees your face, he falters. He knows. He has to know what's running through your head, because he takes a step forward, and you hold up your hand.
"Don't—"
"She's not safe with you," Rex says, gesturing to you. His face is stony, his expression hard. "Any of you. How can you protect her from yourselves?"
Wrecker's eyes dart between you and Rex, and when his gaze settles on you, his brows knit together in a worried frown. He looks distraught, and you wish there was something you could say, something you could do to ease his fears, but you can't get your tongue to work.
"What are you talking about?" he demands. "We'd never hurt her."
"No, you don't understand. It's not—" Rex pauses, and his expression goes from pained to resigned. He takes a deep breath and shakes his head, his shoulders drooping. "What's in your head is more dangerous than you can imagine. I've seen what happens when the chip activates, and I don't want to bury any more of our brothers."
Rex meets each of the Batch's gazes in turn, then his eyes settle on you, and you know that you won't like whatever he has to say next.
"You can't keep her. She's not safe with any of you," he says quietly.
He's not saying anything you haven't thought before, but the way he phrases it sends a sharp stab of hurt through you, and the ache is only exacerbated when he continues.
"I can protect her."
"We can protect her!" Wrecker snaps, taking a step toward Rex. He glares down at the captain, looming over him, and for a moment, you're reminded of just how much larger Wrecker is than him. But Rex doesn't back down, doesn't flinch. Wrecker glances back toward you and Tech, a desperate look in his eye, and his voice goes soft. "Right?"
You open your mouth, but no sound comes out. Tech doesn't speak either. He just stares at Rex, a deep furrow in his brow.
"She'll be safer with us," Hunter argues. His voice is firm, but you can tell from the way he avoids meeting Rex's gaze that he's not nearly as certain as he seems.
"It's not the same," Rex says, and he's clearly struggling to hold onto his patience. "Trust me. It is not something you can control. I couldn't. It's a risk you do not want to take."
You've heard enough. Your throat is tight and your stomach is roiling, but you can't let them continue like this. You swallow back the bile and rise unsteadily to your feet.
"Enough," you say, your voice thin.
The others turn to you, and when Wrecker looks down at you, his expression is heartbreaking. You take a deep, steadying breath, then glance up at him.
"It's okay," you whisper, and force a small, reassuring smile. "Everything will be okay."
Your words don't have the desired effect. Wrecker's brow furrows and he takes a half-step toward you, reaching out his hand. He hesitates, and you close the distance between you, reaching up to take his hand in yours. His hand engulfs yours, and his fingers close around your hand gently, like he's afraid he might hurt you. His grip is warm and reassuring, and for a moment, everything is okay.
But it doesn't last.
“General, please." Rex's voice is soft, imploring, and when you meet his gaze, there's a pleading look in his eyes. "You know I'm right.”
“I’m not a general anymore, Rex," you say, shaking your head. "And I’m not a Jedi."
He opens his mouth to protest, but you cut him off.
"You can't ask this of me," you say, and a shiver runs through you. You wrap your free arm around yourself, wishing desperately for the security and comfort of the cloak you left behind. "Please. Don't."
Rex closes his eyes, and for a moment, the two of you are silent.
"Alright."
The others look relieved. Wrecker's face scrunches up and you think he's going to cry, but he's also smiling, and he wraps his arms around you and picks you up off the floor. He buries his face against your shoulder, and you wrap your arms around his neck, squeezing as tightly as you can.
"We'll figure this out," you say, and pray the others don't notice the way your voice wavers. "It'll be okay."
Wrecker nods, but his voice is thick when he replies. "I don't want you to go."
"I'm not going anywhere," you promise. "I'm not leaving."
But Rex's words are stuck in your head, echoing relentlessly. It's a risk you do not want to take.
Wrecker sets you down, and when he steps back, there's a wet sheen in his eyes. He rubs at his face and laughs nervously. You reach out and take his hand, squeezing it lightly, and offer him a smile. It feels forced and unnatural, and Wrecker must notice, because his expression falls, and he looks almost guilty. He drops his gaze and takes a deep, shuddering breath.
You look past him to the others. Tech is standing by the door, his arms folded tightly across his chest. You can see his hands are clenched, the muscles in his arms tense. His eyes are fixed on the floor, and when he senses your attention, he lifts his gaze and meets your eyes. His brow is furrowed, and you know he wants to say something. You can see the words forming in his mind, but whatever he's thinking, he keeps it to himself. He holds your gaze for a moment longer, then looks away.
Hunter and Echo are standing together, watching you. When you meet Hunter's eye, he gives you a curt nod.
"It'll be alright," he says, and his tone is oddly final. He turns back to Rex. "How do you suggest we get them out?"
"Good question," Rex replies, and his gaze falls on you again. He frowns and tilts his head. "You're sure you don't want to leave?"
"Yes," you reply, but your voice sounds thin, even to you. You clear your throat and repeat the word more firmly, and the others all look at you. "Yes. I'm sure."
Rex hesitates. For a long moment, he just looks at you, as if searching for some sign that you've changed your mind. Then he sighs and nods, his expression grim.
"Alright. I'll be in touch."
He leaves without another word. The moment he disappears up the stairwell, Wrecker tugs you against him, wrapping his arms around you and crushing you against his chest. You squeeze him back, closing your eyes and resting your forehead against his chest. Your heart is pounding so hard that you can feel it in your temples, and your head is throbbing.
"It'll be okay," you repeat, trying to sound reassuring, but there's an uncertainty in your heart that you can't ignore. You're not sure who you're trying to convince, yourself or Wrecker, but you both need to hear the words.
You're not sure what comes next. You've only just got back to the Batch, and now this...
It feels like you're standing on a precipice.
You're not sure which way the wind will blow.
Wrecker's headaches are getting worse, and they come more frequently.
He can barely sleep, and his temper is short. More than once, he's lashed out at the others, and you can tell that it's eating him up inside. He's ashamed and frustrated, and all the more upset because there's nothing he can do. When he does manage to rest, it's fitful. You're not sure how long it's been since he slept properly, and it worries you.
Your own rest is fitful as well.
Ever since Rex's revelation, there's been a tension between you all that was never there before. It's like you're all just waiting for something bad to happen, and every day that passes is just more time spent in anticipation of a nightmare you can't stop.
It's hard to shake, and sometimes, it's all you can do not to cry. You miss the Jedi, the people you thought of as family, and the knowledge that the clones were responsible for their deaths is like a knife through your heart. It was easier when you didn't know the truth, when the deaths felt more distant. Now, every time you think about the Jedi, you can't help wondering how they felt in those final moments. If they knew.
The pain in the Force is still there, but it's different. A constant ache, a reminder of all the lives lost. Sometimes, it's too much, and the grief overwhelms you.
The worst part is knowing that the others are keeping their distance.
It's subtle. Just little things, but you can tell.
You and Omega are still spending most of your downtime together, but when you go to spend time with the others, it doesn't last as long. You've barely seen Echo and Tech, and Hunter is avoiding you like the plague.
And Wrecker.
Wrecker is pulling away, and he's doing it so slowly that you didn't notice at first. At least, not until you woke up one morning to find the bed empty. He hasn't slept beside you since that night with Rex, and he's not spending much time with you outside of missions. And the longer this goes on, the harder it is to break the ice.
When you do manage to talk to him, you try to offer support. You want to reassure him, to comfort him, but the pain in his head makes him recalcitrant. It's like he doesn't want you to know the truth of what's bothering him, and the more you press, the more agitated he gets.
One night, you try to help him with his headache. He's sitting on his bunk, leaning over and clutching his head, and you can't stand by and watch him suffer any longer.
You sit beside him and rest a hand on his back. His skin is slick with sweat, and his muscles are tense, his entire body shaking with pain.
"Can I help?" you ask, keeping your voice soft. "Will it help if I massage your temples?"
Wrecker's answer is a muffled groan, and it's impossible to tell whether it's a yes or a no, so you tentatively begin to rub your fingers in slow circles. You start at his temples and work outward, hoping that some of the tension will release.
You keep rubbing for a while, and it seems to help, a little. When his head finally slumps forward, you pause.
"How's that?" you ask softly.
"S'good," Wrecker grumbles, but the tone of his voice makes it clear that he's anything but pleased. "Thanks."
He doesn't move, doesn't relax. You're not sure what else to do, but you don't want to leave him like this. It feels wrong.
"Is there anything else I can do?" you ask, and you try to keep your voice gentle.
Wrecker shakes his head. "I'm fine."
“You’re not.” Your words are quiet, but they feel like a shout. Wrecker freezes, and for a long moment, neither of you speaks. You sigh and move so that you're kneeling in front of him, and you place your hands on his knees. "Please, talk to me."
He doesn't answer. He doesn't move, his head bowed.
"Why are you shutting me out?" you whisper.
"I'm not," Wrecker mumbles. His hands come up to cover his head, and you have the feeling that the action has less to do with his headache and more to do with his reluctance to meet your gaze. "I'm just..."
His words trail off, and a tense silence falls between you.
"What's wrong?" you ask, and now your voice is wavering. The tears you've been fighting for days are threatening to spill over, but you hold them back. You take a deep, shuddering breath and lean in closer. "Wrecker. Please."
"It's nothing," Wrecker mutters, and his shoulders hunch. He doesn't look at you, and his hands clench into fists.
"It's not nothing."
You hesitate, then gently rest your hand on his cheek. He flinches, and for a moment, your stomach tightens with fear. But then his eyes flick up to yours, and when he sees your face, a pained look crosses his features. His eyes soften, and a single tear rolls down his cheek.
"You're not sleeping. I can tell."
"Neither are you," he grunts, and he tries to pull away.
"I'm worried about you," you whisper. You reach out and touch his hand. "Talk to me."
Wrecker looks away. He wipes the tear from his cheek and clears his throat. "Don't be."
"I can't help it." You reach out and touch his hand, and when he flinches, it's like being stabbed through the heart. You draw back and look away. "I'm sorry. I'm not trying to pressure you."
"I know."
"Just... if you need anything. I'm here."
"I know," he whispers. He looks down at his hands, and the tears are back. He wipes them away, but not before they start rolling down his cheeks. He shakes his head. "I'm a fuckin' mess."
"It's okay."
“It’s not okay,” he snaps. He glares up at you, his brow furrowing, and the pain in his expression is so raw that it takes your breath away. His voice is thick with tears. "I don't wanna hurt you."
"You won't," you insist, but your stomach twists and knots at his words. "I trust you."
"You shouldn't."
"Wrecker—"
"What if Rex was right?" Wrecker asks, and his words cut straight through your heart. "What if he's right? What if—what if something happens, and I..."
His voice trails off, and when he looks at you, his eyes are wet. He blinks and swallows, and when he continues, his voice is strained.
"What if the chip took control, and I hurt you? Or Omega? I couldn't..." He chokes and shakes his head, looking away. "I couldn't live with myself."
"Nothing is going to happen," you insist, and when Wrecker doesn't answer, your heart sinks. You climb up onto the bed and wrap your arms around him, pulling him against you. He rests his forehead against yours, and the tears are streaming freely down his cheeks. You kiss his cheek and reach up to brush away the tears, but there are too many. You wipe away a few, but the others just keep coming, and Wrecker lets out a soft, miserable noise. "Oh, Wrecker."
He doesn't answer. He turns his face into the crook of your neck and wraps his arms around you, pulling you close, and buries his face against you.
"I can't lose you," he whispers, his voice thick. "Not again."
"You won't," you murmur. "I promise. You won't lose me."
You can't be sure that's true, but you don't know what else to say. Wrecker holds you tightly, and you wrap your arms around him and kiss the side of his neck, and then his cheek, his shoulder, his chest, his lips. You want him to know how much you care, how much you need him. How much you love him.
"I'm not going anywhere," you say as your own tears spill over. You squeeze him tight and bury your face against his neck. "You won't lose me."
"If anything happened to you..." Wrecker shudders, and his grip on you tightens. "I couldn't handle it. If something happened, I couldn't—"
He stops and takes a deep, shuddering breath. He presses his face into your hair and squeezes you tightly. His voice is small, almost lost in the darkness.
"I love you."
You freeze. For a moment, your heart stutters, and you feel like your lungs have stopped working. He's never said it before. Not in words, anyway. You’ve known it for a long time, but to hear him say it, even in a moment like this, is something else entirely. It makes you ache.
"I love you," Wrecker repeats, and then his face scrunches up and his words spill out in a rush. "I've loved you for so long. I love everything about you. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me, and the thought of hurting you, or losing you, is too much. I can't. I won't."
"Wrecker." You pull back and take his face in your hands. "Look at me."
"I should have told you earlier," Wrecker mumbles. His words are so slurred together that they're almost unintelligible. "I'm sorry. I'm so sorry."
Your eyes are filled with tears, and it's hard to see, but you know you need to get close to him, to offer him the same reassurance he's given you countless times. So you slide onto his lap, wrapping your arms around him, and rest your forehead against his.
"I'm not. There was never a good time, not really. But now, right now, I'm glad I heard it." You cup his cheek and brush the tears away. "And I'm glad I can tell you now. Because I love you too. So much. And I need you to know that. I'm not going anywhere. Not ever."
You press your lips to his, and he responds instantly, returning the kiss with a hunger that catches you off guard. It's intense and overwhelming, and he pulls you tighter against him, like he's trying to merge the two of you together. His hand slips beneath your shirt, his fingers splayed across your lower back, and he groans into the kiss. It's the most intense and passionate kiss the two of you have ever shared, and it leaves you gasping for breath.
"I love you," you repeat, and when he looks at you, his eyes are bright. He leans in and kisses your forehead, then rests his forehead against yours and closes his eyes.
"I won't let anything happen to you," he whispers. "No matter what. I promise."
"I know." You press a soft kiss to his jaw, then rest your head on his shoulder. "And I won't let anything happen to you. We're in this together. I'm here, no matter what."
Wrecker doesn't reply. He just nods and wraps his arms around you, leaning back until the two of you are lying down. He pulls you on top of him, and when you shift, the movement is enough to send a shiver through him.
He presses his face into your hair and holds you close, and for a long time, the two of you stay like that, holding each other. It's a little awkward, with your legs tangled together and the bunk too small for the two of you, but it feels right. It feels good. Safe.
"I love you,” you whisper again, and Wrecker's arms tighten around you. He kisses the side of your neck, and his breath tickles the hairs on the back of your neck. You snuggle deeper into his embrace and close your eyes.
"Love you," Wrecker mumbles.
The way he says it is so soft, so full of adoration, that your heart breaks a little. You love him. You love him so much. You never thought you'd get to say the words, never thought it would be possible, but now that it's out there, the words come so easily, like they've always been waiting to come out. And the relief of hearing him say them back is almost dizzying.
You stay there, wrapped up in each other's arms, and you listen to the sound of Wrecker's breathing. He falls asleep eventually, and his grip loosens, but he doesn't let go. When you're sure he's sleeping, you shift, resting your head against his chest and listening to the steady beat of his heart.
You close your eyes, and for the first time in a while, you feel safe.
For the first time in a while, sleep comes easily.
As soon as you arrived on Bracca, things took a turn for the worse. You'd all managed to dodge the Scrapper's Guild, but traversing the wreckage of the fallen Venator was a trial in and of itself. There was debris everywhere, and you could hardly breathe in the thick, oppressive air. Every step felt like it could be your last, and you and Hunter couldn't stop sensing something in the murky water below. Something lurking, waiting. And when Wrecker fell in...
He'd nearly drowned. He'd nearly been devoured by that dianoga. You'd thought you'd lost him.
You can't think about it.
He's safe now, and that's all that matters. He's safe, and you can finally breathe again. But the tension is still there, coiled tight in your stomach, and it's not just because of Wrecker. There's something else, something more.
It's been there since Kaller, a feeling that something terrible is looming. You've felt it before, and it's never been wrong. The Force is trying to warn you, but the warnings are growing more frequent, more intense. Something big is coming, and there's no telling when it will happen, but you're sure it's not good.
You're standing in the back of the medbay, trying to keep out of the way as Tech works on Wrecker. He's running scans and taking readings, and the whole time, he's muttering under his breath. You cast a glance at Rex, who's standing next to you, but his attention is focused on the scene in front of him, his brow furrowed and his hands clasped behind his back.
"You've been quiet," he murmurs, his gaze shifting towards you.
"Yeah."
"Wanna talk about it?"
You hesitate. There's no point in keeping it to yourself, and maybe it'll help to get it off your chest.
"The Force is warning me," you say quietly, and Rex nods. "I don't know what it is, but... I can't shake the feeling that something bad is coming."
Rex frowns. "Do the others know?"
You nod, and he turns his gaze back toward the medbay. "Have they said anything?"
"Hunter knows," you say, and the words catch in your throat. "But... he's been keeping his distance."
Rex glances at you. His expression is unreadable.
"They all are," you whisper, and the admission is almost painful. You look away, unable to meet his gaze, and you have to fight the urge to cry. "I don't know what to do."
"You're worried," Rex says. It's not a question.
"Yeah," you reply, and a chill runs through you. You wrap your arms around yourself, hugging tightly, and take a shaky breath. “But it’s not just that. The Force is warning me. They... they could be in danger. All of them."
You swallow, and when you speak again, your voice is quiet.
"All of us."
He studies you for a moment, then looks back at Tech. He's still working, but now he's talking, and whatever he's saying is enough to pull a groan out of Wrecker. Rex watches them for a moment, his expression thoughtful, then looks back at you. His expression is grim.
"How bad is it?"
You don't answer at first. The truth is, you're not sure. But Rex waits patiently, his gaze never leaving your face. Finally, you take a deep breath and force the words out.
"Bad," you say at last. You can't hide the fear in your voice. "Whatever it is, I think it's really bad."
Rex doesn't reply, but you can see the worry on his face. He knows what you're capable of, and he's seen firsthand the things you can do when the Force moves through you. If you're afraid, he's got every reason to be scared, too.
The two of you are silent, and when you can't bear it any longer, you break the silence.
"Do you believe in fate?" you ask.
Rex raises an eyebrow, surprised. He looks back at Tech, then shakes his head.
"Not really. I mean, maybe. Sometimes," he admits, and there's a hint of a smile on his lips. "But I try not to think about it too much."
You nod. "I can't help it."
"Why's that?"
"Because... sometimes, I think it's meant to be. Like, everything that happens is part of some bigger plan, and I can't change it,” you mutter. Your eyes drop to the floor. "All is as the Force wills it, and all that. But I don't know. It's... scary. It makes me feel helpless."
Rex doesn't reply at first. His brow furrows, and for a moment, he seems troubled. He looks over at the others, then back at you, and his expression softens.
"I know what you mean," he says, his voice is gentle. "But whatever it is, we'll handle it."
His hand comes up to rest on your shoulder, and you look at him. His face is serious, and the look in his eyes is reassuring. But he can't give you the answers you want, and the feeling of uncertainty lingers. You turn, pulling away from him, and your gaze falls on the others.
"Yeah," you say, but the word comes out sounding weak. Your eyes meet Wrecker's, and the concern in his expression is enough to make your heart clench. You don't want to worry him. You can't. Not after everything he's been through. You force a smile and say the words you don’t mean, knowing he can hear you. "We'll be fine."
It sounds hollow even to your own ears, but Wrecker relaxes, and the look of worry fades from his eyes. You look away, unable to bear the guilt gnawing at your stomach, and the smile fades from your face.
You know that if something happens, if something goes wrong, he'll blame himself. You don't want that. You don't want him to feel guilty, but the truth is, you're scared. For the first time, you're genuinely terrified. And not just for the Batch.
You're terrified for yourself. For the first time, you have something to lose. Your life, your happiness. You've never had that before.
And you don't want to lose it.
But the truth is, there's nothing you can do. You have to face the future, whatever it may bring, and pray that things turn out okay.
Rex's gaze flicks between you and Wrecker. He can see the concern in Wrecker's face, the worry in yours. His eyes are filled with sadness. Regret.
"I'm sorry," he says. "About before. I didn't..."
His voice trails off, and his brow furrows.
"I should have been more tactful," he says finally, and the corners of his mouth twitch up. He looks away, and when he speaks again, his voice is soft. "It's not an easy thing to talk about."
"No," you agree. "It's not."
He doesn't say anything, and neither do you. You both know there's nothing to say. There's no point in arguing or talking about what might happen. No point in making promises or predictions. There's only the present, the future unknown. So instead, Rex just squeezes your shoulder once more before letting his hand fall away.
He moves to stand near Hunter, and the two of them start talking quietly. You watch them for a moment, but they're too far away for you to hear, so you turn your attention back to Wrecker and Tech.
Wrecker is groaning and wincing, his face contorted with pain as he hunches over. He looks miserable, and you want to comfort him, but Tech is moving him from one piece of equipment to another, and there's no room for you.
Omega is hovering nearby, a look of concern on her face. She's wringing her hands, and her gaze darts between the two of you. She wants to help, and she's doing her best, but there's only so much any of you can do. You walk over to place your hand on her shoulder and try to give her a reassuring smile, but it feels forced.
You hate seeing him like this. You hate feeling helpless.
"Relax," Tech says as he prepares the surgical laser. "This won't hurt a bit."
Wrecker glares at him, and the look on his face would be amusing if not for the circumstances. Tech gives him an apologetic smile, then looks back at you.
"Could I trouble you to assist?"
"Of course," you say, and step closer.
"Hold his shoulders, please."
You do as he asks, moving to stand behind the bed, and hold Wrecker's shoulders firmly. He looks up at you, and the misery on his face is clear. It's hard to see him like this, but he needs you. So you do your best. You smile down at him, and when he smiles back, the tightness in your chest loosens, and the fear recedes, a little. You lean forward and press a kiss to his forehead.
"It'll be alright," you whisper. "You're going to be okay."
Wrecker takes a shuddering breath and nods, and you feel his body tense as Tech steps closer. You let out a slow, steady breath, and close your eyes, trying to impart as much calm through the Force as possible. Wrecker's shoulders relax, and his breathing slows.
Tech is talking again, and the sound of the laser whines, then there's a flash of light. You feel the hairs on the back of your neck stand up, and the air around you fills with static.
"You're in direct violation of Order 66," Wrecker growls, and your eyes snap open.
He lurches forward, his face contorting, and the force of him breaking from your hold sends you stumbling backwards. Wrecker grabs Tech by the throat, the laser slipping from his fingers and clattering to the floor. Tech tries to grab Wrecker's hand, but Wrecker is stronger, and he shoves him backwards, slamming him into the wall hard enough that it dents.
He's staring at his brother with cold, empty eyes, and you're frozen, unable to move or speak. There's no sign of the man you love, no trace of the gentle, caring, passionate man who's loved and cherished you since the moment you met. His face is devoid of emotion, his eyes blank and dead. There's no recognition, no hint of compassion or mercy.
Nothing but a cold, empty void.
Your blood runs cold, and your stomach lurches. This isn't him. This can't be him.
"No! Stop!" you shout. Your voice cracks, and when Wrecker's gaze snaps towards you, a cold sweat breaks out across your skin. His eyes are dark, and there's something else in his expression. Something that scares the hell out of you.
Wrecker's lips curl into a snarl, and the anger is so fierce and sudden that it catches you off guard. You take a step forward, but Rex catches your arm, stopping you. You don't look at him. You can't look away from Wrecker, from his eyes.
His grip on Tech's throat tightens. Tech's hands scrabble at his hand, and his feet kick uselessly against the wall.
"Please! Wrecker, stop! You're killing him!"
For a moment, you think you've gotten through to him. For a moment, you see something in his eyes, a flash of recognition, a spark of life. But it's gone as soon as it appears, and he throws Tech across the room with a snarl.
You jerk your arm free from Rex's grip and rush forward, but Echo catches you around the waist and pulls you back behind cover. You struggle against him, desperate to help, but he's too strong.
"Wrecker!" Hunter cries. "Stop! Fight it!"
Wrecker is beyond hearing. He grabs his blaster and fires wildly, narrowly missing Rex as he dives behind the crates next to you, Hunter and Omega close behind. Your heart is pounding, and you're shaking so hard your teeth are chattering. Omega is trembling too, and she's staring blankly ahead with wide, frightened eyes. She looks like she's on the verge of tears.
"He'll destroy the equipment if we don't get him out of here," Echo says, his voice strained.
"You're all traitors!" Wrecker bellows.
He keeps firing, and it's a miracle no one's been hit yet. Rex pops his head up, ducking back down just in time to avoid being shot.
"You need to run," he says to you. "He's not going to stop until he kills you, and I don't think any of us are going to survive if that happens."
You shake your head. "I can't leave him."
"There's no other way. We'll distract him, but you need to go. Now!"
"No!" You shove Echo away and lunge towards Wrecker. Hunter is in front of you in an instant, grabbing your shoulders and shoving you back.
"Stop," he says. "Listen to Rex. Please. He'll kill you. Do you understand? You have to go."
"He needs me." You can feel the tears coming, and when Hunter sees them, his face softens.
"He does," he agrees. "But right now, he's a danger to you. He's a danger to everyone. You have to go. I'll keep him safe. I promise. But right now, he's going to kill you."
He holds your gaze, and the pain in his eyes is so raw and intense that you feel like your heart is breaking.
"What if you can't stop him?" you demand, your voice cracking. "What if you die? I can't let him do this."
Hunter doesn't answer. He's not even looking at you anymore. His attention is focused on his rampaging brother, and he's getting ready to strike. You can see it in his body language, the tension in his shoulders, the set of his jaw.
"Omega, stay with Tech," he says, ignoring you. "Make sure he's alright. We'll handle Wrecker."
Omega nods, and the two of you exchange a long, sorrowful look.
"It'll be okay," she whispers. "He'll be okay."
"I... I hope so."
You're not sure how much of that you believe.
"Go," Hunter urges. "We'll find you. I promise."
"Hunter—"
"Go."
You swallow hard and nod, and then you're running, narrowly dodging the blaster bolts thudding into the doorframe as you dash out the doors. You hear Wrecker's howl of rage, and then the sound of blaster fire as the others charge him, and the sound makes you sob.
"No," you whisper, and then you're running.
You're not sure where to go, and the ship is a blur around you as you dart down the halls, tears streaming down your cheeks. You run until you can't run anymore, and then you stumble, your chest heaving and your lungs burning. Your legs are weak, and the muscles in your thighs are aching, but you push on, determined not to give up.
You have to get away. You have to stay alive. If you're alive, you can help him.
But the further you get from Wrecker, the more you feel like your heart is being ripped out. You want to be with him, to save him, but Hunter was right. You have no chance of defeating him without killing him, and the thought of you dying, of leaving him alone, terrifies you.
So you run.
You don't stop until the sound of his blaster fire has faded, and even then, you don't dare stop moving. You're sobbing uncontrollably now, and it's hard to see. Your vision is blurred, and the tears are pouring down your cheeks. You have no idea where you are, and every corridor and door looks the same. It's impossible to tell which way leads out, or even if there is an exit. All you know is that you're lost, and for the first time in a long time, you’re alone.
You finally come to a stop and lean against the wall, gasping for breath. You feel sick, and the walls are spinning. You squeeze your eyes shut and rest your head against the wall, willing the world to stop.
But it doesn't. And it's not just the room that's spinning. It's everything. Your whole world is spinning out of control, and you’re helpless to stop it. You've lost everything. You've lost your home, your friends, and now you've lost the man you love. He's been taken from you, and there's nothing you can do.
You're powerless.
Hot tears spill down your cheeks. Your chest is tight, and it feels like your heart is shattering. You can't breathe. You can't think. You just stand there, crying and shaking and feeling completely, utterly useless.
After what feels like hours, the tears begin to slow. You take a deep, shuddering breath, and the knot in your stomach loosens, just a little.
There's still a chance, you tell yourself. They'll stop him. They'll get him out of there. Wrecker will be okay. Everything will be okay. It has to be.
And then you sense him.
Wrecker's warm presence in the Force is gone, replaced by something cold and empty. He’s always felt warm, bright and strong, but now there's nothing there. Nothing but a cold, hollow void. A darkness so intense that it makes your skin crawl.
Your head snaps up, and you can feel him, a shadow looming in the corridor behind you. His presence is like a black hole, sucking the life and warmth out of the room, and you can't move. You can't breathe. Your heart is hammering in your chest, and the hair on the back of your neck stands up.
Your instincts are screaming at you to run, but you can't. You won't.
You don't know if it's stupid or brave, but you turn to face him.
You move slowly, terrified of what you'll see, and when your eyes meet his, a shiver runs down your spine.
He's standing there, his breathing labored and his body tensed, and he's staring at you with an intensity that makes your skin crawl. In the dim light of the wrecked ship, his face is barely visible, but his eyes are shining with a cold, cruel light. There's no recognition in them, no hint of the man you love, and for a moment, you can't believe what you're seeing.
But the hatred radiating off him is real, a tangible thing, and it's enough to make you sick. It's worse than any injury or torture. Worse than anything you've ever experienced. It's a raw, visceral hatred, and it's directed right at you.
You stand your ground, your hands shaking, and you clench them into fists.
"Wrecker," you say, and the words sound small and weak. "I'm sorry."
His brow furrows, and his jaw tenses.
"I should have done more," you continue, and the words catch in your throat. You're choking on the lump that's formed there, and you swallow, fighting back the urge to sob. "I should have protected you."
Wrecker doesn't answer. His gaze flickers over your face, taking in your tear-stained cheeks and the fear in your eyes. You can feel his hatred, the cold rage coiled tight in his muscles. He's barely holding himself back, and the tension in his body is palpable.
"Please," you whisper. "You have to fight this. This isn't you."
He doesn't reply. He takes a step towards you, and you tense, ready to defend yourself. You don't want to hurt him. You don't want to hurt him. You can't.
"Wrecker, please. Don't do this." Your voice cracks, and when he doesn't react, the tears start flowing again. "I love you. I need you. Please, don't do this."
Wrecker pauses, and his eyes widen. The hatred in his eyes wavers, and for a moment, you let yourself believe that you've reached him. But then his lip curls, and the hatred comes surging back. It's stronger this time, fueled by a rage so intense that it takes your breath away.
"Traitor," he growls, and then he lunges at you.
He moves so fast that you barely have time to react. You dodge out of the way, barely avoiding his grasp, and his hand closes around empty air. He snarls and whirls, his eyes burning with hatred. You take a step back, and the tears are streaming down your face.
"Stop this!" you cry. "Wrecker, please! I don't want to hurt you!"
He doesn't listen. He moves with a speed and grace that belies his size, and he's on you in an instant. You manage to avoid him again, but only just. He slams into the wall next to you, and the impact makes the metal buckle. The sound is deafening, and it sends a shockwave through the room. The walls creak and groan, and dust and debris rain down from the ceiling.
Wrecker's head snaps towards you, his eyes burning with a cold, cruel fire, and your stomach lurches. His lips curl into a snarl, and then he's coming for you again.
You turn and run, darting down the corridor, and he's right behind you. You can hear the pounding of his boots on the floor, and the sound of his ragged breathing. He's gaining on you, and you don't know if you can keep ahead of him without hurting him.
Your eyes are wide and desperate, and your heart is racing. You're terrified, but you force yourself to push that fear aside, to try and remember your training. You can't let it control you. You can't let it consume you.
If you do, you'll never save him. You'll never get him back. You have to stay focused. You have to stay calm.
But it's so hard.
Wrecker roars, and you feel the air rush past you as he grabs at your arm. You jerk free, and his fingers close around empty air. You twist and slam your shoulder into his side, and he stumbles, hissing with rage. You reach out with the Force and shove him back, giving yourself just enough room to move, and then you're running again.
"Please," you sob. "Please, stop."
He doesn't.
You dodge around a corner, and the floor suddenly disappears beneath your feet. Your eyes go wide, and you cry out as the world drops out from under you. You tumble down the sudden drop, landing hard on your shoulder, and the breath is knocked from your lungs. You gasp, pain lancing through your shoulder, and for a moment, you're too stunned to move.
The sound of boots pounding on the floor above snaps you out of your daze, and you roll onto your back, pushing yourself to your feet. Your head whips around, taking in your surroundings, and it only takes you a moment to realize where you are. You're in the cargo bay, and the doors leading out to the planet are mere meters away.
Your heart leaps. You can get out. You can get help.
But you hesitate, and the feeling of his presence in the Force is enough to make your blood run cold. You dart behind a stack of crates just as Wrecker lands on the floor in front of you. He hits the ground hard, and the impact is enough to make the floor underneath you shake.
Your hand clasps over your mouth to hide your surprised gasp. Your chest is heaving, and your heart is racing. The tears are still falling, and you're trembling so hard that your knees are shaking.
The sudden silence is almost deafening, and the only sound is the distant hum of the ship's engines. You don't dare to breathe. You can't make a sound.
"I know you're here," Wrecker says. His voice is low and menacing. "You can't hide forever."
He steps forward, his boots crunching on broken glass. His footsteps are slow, methodical, like he's stalking his prey. He's close. So close. Too close.
"Come out, traitor," he snarls.
You shrink back against the crates. Your heart is pounding so hard that you're sure he can hear it. Your palms are sweating, and the crate next to you is slick with condensation. You have nowhere to go, and no way out. If you try to run, he'll catch you. And if you try to fight, you'll have to kill him.
"I'll find you," Wrecker growls. His voice is low and menacing, and it sends a chill down your spine. "You can't hide from me."
He moves closer, and the sound of his footsteps seems to grow louder with each passing second. You hold your breath, and your hand drifts toward your lightsaber on your hip on instinct before you clench your fist and drop your arm. You can't. You can't use it. You won't.
You won't hurt him.
You'll die first.
Wrecker moves around the crates, and his shadow falls across the wall. You can see his outline, and the hatred emanating off him is like a physical thing. It's palpable, suffocating, and it's enough to make your heart skip a beat.
You hear a thud, and a crate falls to the floor with a loud crash. You flinch, and your hand goes to your lightsaber again, but you stop yourself. You can't use it. You can't. Not against him. Not like this.
Another crate topples. And another. And another. Wrecker's getting closer. You can hear him breathing, and your heart is pounding so hard that your head is spinning. You can't see him, but you know he's there, lurking just out of sight.
He's so close.
So close.
He stops, and the room is deathly silent. You can't hear his breathing, and he's motionless, as if he's waiting for you to make a sound. The seconds tick by, and the tension in the air is so thick that it's almost impossible to breathe.
You can't take it.
"Please," you whimper, and the word comes out as a sob.
He freezes, and for a moment, everything is still.
And then the air shifts. You sense a sudden movement, and a fraction of a second later, the crate above you explodes. You yelp and dive to the side, rolling out of the way, and the crate is reduced to splinters.
Your scramble to your feet, your back slamming against the wall, and you look up. Wrecker is standing over you, and his eyes are cold, dark pools. His hulking form trembles with rage, and he rushes towards you, his hand curled into a fist. You duck under the blow, and your hand flashes out, connecting with his chin. He stumbles, but he doesn't stop.
He lunges at you, and you dodge, his hand catching your tunic and ripping the fabric. The sound of it tearing is deafening, and you feel the heat of his breath on your skin as he growls.
"Stop!" you plead.
He doesn't.
"Traitor," he hisses. He's on you again, and this time, you can't avoid him.
Wrecker hits you in the stomach, and the breath leaves your lungs in a rush. Pain blooms through your torso, and your knees buckle. He swings again, and you throw up your arms, blocking the blow. The force of it knocks you to the ground, and your head smacks against the hard floor.
His fingers wrap around your throat, and he lifts you off the ground with one hand. Wrecker pulls you up close to his face, and the look in his eyes is terrifying. It's pure, unbridled hatred, and it's directed at you.
"Wrecker," you manage to croak. Your eyes search his desperate to find any sign of the man you love, and he growls, his grip tightening.
"Wrecker, please." Tears stream down your face, and you claw at his hands, struggling to breathe. Your lungs are burning, and the pain in your head is almost unbearable. He's going to kill you. He's going to kill you, and there's nothing you can do to stop him.
You know that your next breath will be your last, and you feel a strange sense of peace wash over you. There are worse fates than dying by his hands. Worse things than losing your life. You're not afraid. You're not angry. All you feel is sorrow, and a deep, aching love for the man in front of you. The man who's been your whole world, your heart, and the only home you've ever known.
If this is how it ends, so be it. At least you got to know him.
"Wrecker," you choke out, your voice barely audible. "I... I love..."
His fingers tighten, and everything goes black.
Your eyes flutter open, and the world swims back into focus. There's a dull ache in your skull, and the air feels strangely thin. Your chest is heaving, and it takes you a moment to realize that you're not breathing.
No, you're hyperventilating.
Wrecker.
His name is on your lips, and you gasp before a terrible, aching pain lances through your skull. You try to move, but your body is heavy.
You're lying on your side. The ground beneath you is hard, and the air is thick and heavy. There's a bitter taste in your mouth, and your throat is burning. You try to take a deep breath, but it's like someone's squeezing the life out of you.
"Hey. Easy."
The voice is familiar. Soothing. But it doesn't register.
Someone rolls you onto your back, and the movement sends a jolt of pain through your body. You gasp, and the air burns. You can't see anything, but you feel something cool and wet being pressed against your face. It hurts, and you try to pull away, but a gentle hand holds you still.
"Shhh. Relax."
The voice is familiar, but your mind is too fuzzy to place it. Your head is throbbing, and your throat feels like it's on fire. You can't focus. You can't think. All you can do is lay there and try to breathe.
"Stay still. I'm trying to clean you up."
You try to open your eyes, but everything is blurry. A pair of dark brown eyes stares down at you, but it's not the mismatched ones you're looking for.
Rex.
He's holding something cold and wet against your face, and the sensation is painful, but soothing. You take a few shallow breaths, the air finally starting to reach your lungs. You cough, and it's like sandpaper being scraped against the back of your throat.
"Don't try to talk," Rex says. "You need rest."
Rest. The word echoes through your head. Your thoughts are jumbled, and you can't seem to focus.
"What... What happened?" you manage to croak. Your voice is hoarse, and your words come out sounding more like a growl than anything else.
"I think it's better if I don't tell you," Rex says. He's frowning, and the look on his face makes your heart clench. "Just focus on breathing."
You take another breath, and this one is a little easier. The pressure in your head is fading, and your vision is starting to clear.
"Wrecker," you rasp. "Is he...?"
"Yeah," Rex says softly. "He's... He's okay."
"Where is he?"
"We got his chip out, and the others," Rex tells you. "Tech is treating his injuries now."
There's a catch in his voice, and you can tell that something is wrong. Something terrible. You feel a sharp stab of panic, and you try to sit up, but the room spins. Rex grabs your shoulders and eases you back down.
"Just stay still," he says. "You need to rest."
"I'm fine," you argue, but your voice is weak, and the effort of talking makes your head spin. Rex shakes his head.
"No, you're not." Rex sighs and presses a damp cloth to your forehead. It's cool and soothing, and the pain begins to ease a little. "Just give it a minute."
"Rex..."
"He's okay. I promise." He smiles at you, but it’s forced, and there's a sadness in his eyes that makes your heart twist. "But he's not doing well. We're all gonna need some time."
Your heart sinks. You know what that means. Rex is telling you that Wrecker needs space. That he's not himself. That he's ashamed and guilty and doesn't want to face you. It hurts. More than the physical pain, more than the headache, the exhaustion, and the fear, it's a deeper, sharper kind of pain. The kind that cuts to the bone, and you can feel tears stinging the corners of your eyes.
"I understand," you say, and you hate the way your voice cracks.
Rex's smile falters, and the sadness in his eyes intensifies.
"Hey, now," he murmurs. "It'll be okay."
"No. It won't." Your voice is thick, and the tears are flowing freely now. You can't stop them. You don't even try. Rex pulls you into his arms, and you bury your face in his shoulder, sobbing.
"He tried to kill me," you choke out. "He... He was going to..."
Rex holds you, and he doesn't say a word. He doesn't have to. The pain is written all over his face, and he knows exactly what you're going through. He was there. He watched Wrecker lose control, and he had to watch him almost kill the woman he loves. He had to watch him almost kill his friend.
"I'm so sorry," Rex whispers. He holds you close, and his hand moves gently up and down your back, soothing you. "I'm so sorry."
You cry until your throat is raw and your lungs are burning, and when the tears finally stop, you're exhausted. Your body is limp, and your head is pounding. You lean against Rex, and his arms tighten around you.
"Come on," he murmurs. "Let's get you up."
He helps you to your feet, and you wince. Every muscle in your body is aching, your throat is sore, and the wound on the back of your head is throbbing. You feel weak, and the ground seems to sway under your feet. Rex holds you steady while the feeling slowly fades.
"I've got you," he says. Then, slowly, he leads you towards the medbay. You lean against him, and with each step, you can feel the guilt and shame and anger radiating off him in waves. It's overwhelming, and it makes your heart ache.
"Rex," you murmur. "Are you alright?"
"No," he admits. "But I will be."
"I'm so sorry," you whisper.
"It's not your fault," he says, but you can hear the bitterness in his voice, and the resentment. He blames himself for what happened. He's taking the weight of the entire situation on his shoulders.
You want to tell him that it's not his fault, either, but you're too tired. So you lean against him, and let him guide you to the medbay.
The door is open, and Tech is inside, tending to a cut on Hunter’s face. Echo is helping, and Omega is sitting in the corner, her knees drawn up to her chest. She looks exhausted, tears staining her cheeks, but her face brightens when she sees you.
She scrambles to her feet and rushes towards you, throwing her arms around your waist. The impact sends a shock of pain through your ribs, but you bite your lip and hide your wince. She's clinging to you like a lifeline, and you can feel the tremor in her body as she tries not to cry. You hold her close, stroking her hair, and the ache in your heart deepens.
"Hey," you murmur. "You alright?"
Omega nods against you, her fingers digging into the back of your tunic.
"Are you?" she whispers.
"Yeah," you lie. "I'm okay."
"You're not," she says, and the hurt in her voice is enough to make your throat tighten. "But it's okay. We're here."
She hugs you tighter, and you lean into the embrace, your heart aching. You wish it was as simple as that, but nothing is. Nothing will be. Not for a long time. Maybe not ever. You hold her close, closing your eyes, and her presence in the Force is warm and bright, just like always.
You let yourself get lost in it, and the pain begins to ebb, if only a little, before you open your eyes again.
"Where's Wrecker?" you ask. Your voice is soft, but everyone in the room hears it and the tension is palpable. They exchange glances, their expressions grim.
"He's resting," Tech says carefully. "His injuries are relatively minor, and the surgery was successful, but his mental state is... concerning."
You swallow hard. You knew it was bad, but hearing Tech say it out loud is different. It makes it real, and the weight of that reality is suffocating. You take a shaky breath and nod, but the tears are threatening again, and your voice is unsteady.
"Can I see him?"
"He doesn't want to see anyone," Echo says. His voice is low, his words measured. He's... He's not himself. Not yet."
"I know." Your voice cracks. "I just... I want him to know that I'm here. That I care. That I..."
"Give him time," Hunter murmurs, his expression pained. "He's not in a good place."
"But I—"
"No." Rex's tone is gentle, but firm. "It's not a good idea. Trust me. He needs space. He needs to figure out how to live with what he did."
"It wasn't him," you protest, but even as you say it, you know that it's not entirely true. It was him. Just not the him you know.
"I know," he says. "But it was his hands that almost killed you. And that's hard to come to terms with."
You swallow hard and nod. You know he's right, but it doesn't make it any easier. It doesn't ease the pain in your chest or the ache in your head. You want to see him, to talk to him, but you know it's not what he needs. It's not what you need.
You let out a shuddering breath, your shoulders sagging. You're exhausted, and the world is spinning, and all you want to do is collapse into a ball and cry.
Tech approaches, and he hesitates for a moment before his hand settles gently on your shoulder. His eyes are sympathetic, but the frown on his face is deep, his expression troubled.
"How are you feeling?" he asks.
"I'm okay," you answer. The lie comes easily, almost automatically. It's a reflex. One that has been well-honed over the years, but one that's not very convincing. Not anymore.
He nods and studies you for a moment. Then, he glances at Rex.
"Help her onto the cot," he says. "I'll do a quick examination and treat her injuries."
"No," you protest. "I'm fine. I just need to sleep."
"You're not fine," Rex counters. He's not unkind, but his tone leaves no room for argument. "You were attacked, and you have a head injury. We need to make sure that you're okay."
"I am. Really."
"We need to make sure," Tech insists.
"I'm not—"
"You're getting checked out," Rex says firmly. "And that's final."
You open your mouth to argue, but the words die on your lips. You know he's right. Your entire body aches, and every breath is painful. You're not fine. You know it. But the idea of hearing it from someone else is too much. It's too real.
Rex gently guides you towards the cot, his arm around your waist, and you let him. There's no point in fighting, not when the others are worried about you. So you let him help you onto the bed, and Omega sits next to you, her small hand finding yours.
Tech begins his examination, and Rex hovers nearby, watching closely. You feel small and fragile and weak, and it's a strange feeling. You're used to being strong, to fighting your own battles. But now, you can barely stand on your own. It's a reminder of how fragile you really are, and it makes your chest tighten. No matter how good of a Jedi you can claim to be, it's impossible to ignore that the only reason you're alive is because Rex stepped in and saved your life.
"You have a mild concussion," Tech reports, and his words pull you out of your thoughts. "Several bruised ribs, and multiple contusions." He pauses, and his gaze shifts to your throat. "And those bruises will need time to heal."
Your hand reaches up, and you touch the spot where Wrecker had been holding you. The skin is tender, and the contact makes you wince.
"Yeah," Rex says, anger clear in his voice. "That's going to be a tough one to cover up."
You look away.
"It could have been worse," Tech points out.
"It was bad enough,” he snaps. When you flinch, Rex's eyes widen, regret flickering across his features. "Sorry. I didn't mean..."
"It’s okay." Your voice is quiet, almost a whisper. You swallow, but the lump in your throat remains. "I know."
Tech moves to examine the bruise on your stomach, his touch gentle.
"We can apply bacta to the worst of the bruises," Tech offers. "That will help with the healing process."
You nod, but you can’t bring yourself to say anything. You close your eyes and try not to think about it. About the way Wrecker had been staring at you. The coldness in his eyes. The rage. The hatred. The way his hands had tightened around your throat. The way he had been intent on killing you.
"Can I help you?"
Tech's voice is soft, and he sounds unsure of himself. It's such a stark contrast to his usual confidence, and it makes your chest tighten. This is hard for him, too. Hard for all of them.
"I'm okay," you murmur. "Really."
"You don’t have to be," Tech says. His tone is gentle, but there's an edge to it. “We understand, and we'll do our best to make sure that you're taken care of."
You open your eyes and look at him, and the sympathy in his gaze makes you want to cry. You don't want to be the one everyone's worrying about. You don't want to be the helpless victim, the one who needs to be coddled and comforted. You're a Jedi. You're supposed to be the one taking care of others, not the other way around.
But there's nothing you can do. Nothing you can say. So you nod, letting the tears spill down your cheeks, and Tech places a hand on your shoulder.
"Thank you," you whisper, and the words come out sounding more like a sob.
"Of course," Tech replies, and there's an unfamiliar warmth in his voice. "You're one of us, and we take care of our own."
He turns back to his instruments, and you lay down, resting your head on the pillow. The medbay is quiet, save for the soft beeps and whirrs of the machines, and the familiar sounds are oddly comforting. Tech continues to examine and treat you, his movements careful and precise. He works silently, and the others are gathered nearby, their attention focused on you. It's strange, but it feels nice, being the center of their concern. It makes you feel safe, and it eases some of the pain and fear and uncertainty.
You're surrounded by your family. By the people who love you and care about you. And as the exhaustion overwhelms you, and the pain fades into a dull ache, you realize that's all that really matters. You may not be fine, but you're alive, and you have people that care about you. And that's more than some can say.
It's been three days since the chip incident, and things are... strained. You've barely seen Wrecker, and when you have, he hasn't said a word. He won't look at you. He won't even be in the same room as you. It hurts, but you're trying to be patient. Trying to give him the space he needs. But it's hard, and every day, the ache in your chest grows a little bit stronger.
You'd hesitated to say goodbye to Rex, and he'd again offered to take you with him. To keep you safe, to give you a place to heal. And again, you'd refused, promising him that things would be okay. And they would. You're certain. They had to be.
But the entire time you'd spoken to him in hushed whispers, you could feel Wrecker's eyes on you. When you'd finally pulled away from Rex to board the Marauder, Wrecker had turned on his heel, disappearing into the ship without a word. He hadn't so much as glanced at you, let alone said anything.
The pain of that had cut deeper than the bruises on your throat, but you'd hidden it, plastering a smile on your face for the others, even though they all knew better.
The daring escape you'd made from Bracca had only served to complicate matters, and the entire team was on edge after encountering Crosshair again. The tension in the air is thick, and it seems like everyone is walking on eggshells, afraid of setting someone off.
It's a far cry from the usual banter, teasing, and camaraderie that's typical aboard the ship, and the only sounds are the hum of the engine and the occasional beep from the instrument panel.
No one has spoken in hours, and the silence is oppressive. You haven't left your bunk since that morning, the high vantage point allowing you to see everything without having to interact with anyone.
It's lonely, but it's also safe.
No one bothers you, and you're free to let your mind wander. You watch the others, and the sight of them fills you with a strange mixture of emotions. You're proud of them, and the love you feel for them is almost overwhelming. But there's also a sense of loss.
What happened was a reminder that everything could change in an instant, and you're not ready for that. You're not ready to lose any of them. Not when they're the only family you have left.
You close your eyes, drawing in a deep breath, and let the feeling wash over you. It's a bittersweet sort of sorrow, and it makes your heart ache. You know that they're not going anywhere, that the five of them are a force to be reckoned with, but you can't help the anxiety that lingers, the fear that something might go wrong. You've already lost so much. You can't lose them, too.
The sound of footsteps approaching the bunk pulls you from your thoughts, and you open your eyes, expecting to see Echo. But the figure in the doorway isn't him.
"I'm sorry."
Wrecker's voice is barely a whisper, but it's loud enough to startle you, and you sit up, wincing as your ribs protest. He’s standing below, looking up at you with his mismatched eyes. His eyes are wide and pleading, and he's fidgeting, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. You can tell he's nervous, but there's a hint of something else, too. Sadness. Guilt. Shame.
"It's okay," you say automatically, but the words feel hollow.
"No. It's not." His voice is low, and there's an edge of desperation to it, and his hands squeeze into fists. You can feel the anger radiating off him, and it makes your blood run cold. He looks like he wants to punch a hole in the wall, and you have no doubt that he could if he wanted to. He could tear the whole ship apart. He could tear you apart.
You swallow, but your throat is dry, and the fear is starting to build.
"I could have killed you," Wrecker continues, his voice shaking. “I... I wanted to kill you. I was gonna..."
He trails off, unable to finish the sentence, and his shoulders slump. The anger fades, and the shame is so intense that you feel it like a physical blow. Wrecker closes his eyes and runs a hand over his face, his shoulders trembling.
"I tried to kill my own brothers," he says, and his voice cracks. "And I... I almost..."
He takes a shaky breath, tears stinging the corners of his eyes, and he shakes his head. You're at a loss for words, and all you can do is watch him struggle with the weight of his emotions. You want to say something, to offer some kind of comfort, but you can't. You're just as broken as he is.
"I'm sorry," he whispers, and his voice is thick with emotion. "I'm so, so sorry."
"Wrecker..."
He looks up at you, and the raw anguish in his eyes makes your heart twist.
"Wrecker, please, it's okay. I know it wasn't—"
"No. It's not." He shakes his head, his expression pained. "It wasn't me. But it was."
You open your mouth to argue, but he holds up a hand, cutting you off.
"I remember everything. I remember wanting to hurt you. I remember how good it felt. How right." His eyes darken, his lips curling into a snarl. "I'm a monster."
"No, Wrecker," you insist. "No. You're not."
"Yes, I am."
"You're not," you repeat, more firmly this time. You haven’t used the Force in days, but it flows through you now, warm and reassuring, and you can feel the conviction in your own words. "You're a good man. You're not a monster. I saw you try to fight it. I saw the struggle. I know what's in your heart. And it's not evil."
"I should have fought harder." His fists clench, and he hangs his head. "I'm supposed to protect you, but I... I'm the one who tried to..."
"Wrecker."
Your voice is sharp, but he doesn't respond. He's lost in his own guilt, his own self-loathing, and the weight of it is crushing him.
"Please, Wrecker, stop." You slide off the bunk, landing lightly on your feet, and you approach him, reaching for his hands. He pulls away, and it feels like a knife in your heart. "You don't have to apologize. I'm not mad at you. I'm worried about you."
"You should be." His voice is flat, his words coming out in a growl. "I tried to kill you."
"But you didn't."
"I would have." He turns away from you, his jaw clenched, his shoulders tense. "If Rex hadn't stepped in, I would have."
You reach out, laying a hand on his arm, but he flinches, jerking away from your touch. It's a rejection, plain and simple, but it's not unexpected. He's pulling away, both physically and emotionally, and it's tearing you apart.
"Don't," he says. "Just don't."
"Please," you whisper, your voice thick with emotion. "Please, talk to me."
"What's there to talk about?" He sounds bitter, defeated, but he doesn't pull away this time. "I'm a monster."
"No, you're not," you insist. "You're my hero."
"Don't say that," he mutters.
"It's true. You are.” He starts to speak again, but you’re faster, and your words cut him off. "You saved my life. Over and over again. You've never given up on me, even when the odds were stacked against us. You've always been there for me, no matter what."
He doesn't say anything, but you can tell that your words are affecting him. His shoulders are hunched, his body tense, but there's a tremor in his muscles, a slight shudder. You step closer, pressing yourself against his back, and you wrap your arms around his waist. You hold him tight, your fingers digging into the fabric of his shirt, and you rest your forehead between his shoulder blades.
"I trust you, Wrecker. I know you'd never hurt me willingly. And the truth is, I could've fought back. I could've stopped you. But I didn't. Because I trust you. I trust you with my life. And I always will."
He stiffens, his breath hitching.
"You're not a monster," you continue. "You're not a liability. You're my boyfriend, and you're my best friend. And I'm not afraid of you."
You press a kiss between his shoulder blades, lingering there for a moment. Your throat is tight, your heart racing, and you're filled with an overwhelming sense of affection and devotion. The feelings are strong, almost overwhelming, and you don't try to push them down. You don't try to hide them. You just let them flow through you, let them fill the space between the two of you.
You've held them back for so long, afraid to show your feelings, afraid to let yourself be vulnerable, but now, the dam has broken, and you're drowning in the intensity of your emotions. There's a warmth spreading through your chest, a kind of peace that you've never felt before, and it's almost euphoric. It's like the first breath after surfacing from a deep dive, and the air is sweet, filling your lungs.
"I love you, Wrecker," you murmur.
"Don't," he growls, but the tension is gone from his body, his muscles relaxing under your touch. He leans back against you, his head dropping forward, his eyes closed.
"I do," you say softly. "I love you. And I'm not afraid."
You hold him, the two of you locked together, neither of you willing to move, afraid that the moment will end. He's trembling, his breathing shallow, his fingers curling around your arms, but he doesn't pull away. He doesn't reject you.
"I trust you," you whisper. "I love you. And nothing will ever change that."
There's a long, heavy silence, and then, finally, he speaks.
"I love you, too."
It's barely a whisper, but the words are clear, and the weight of them makes your heart soar. You tighten your arms around his waist, burying your face in his back, and you feel the tears stinging the corners of your eyes. You’re so happy that it almost hurts, the emotions swelling in your chest, making it difficult to breathe. It feels like you're floating, the weight of everything finally lifted.
“I love you so much,” he mutters. “More than anything. But you should be with someone else. Someone safer. Someone who won't..."
"Wrecker, stop." Your voice is firm, and you squeeze him, making him gasp. "I don't want anyone else. I want you."
He takes a shaky breath, his hands moving down your arms until his fingers are laced with yours. He squeezes, his grip gentle, and you squeeze back.
"I don't deserve you," he says.
"Yes, you do."
Wrecker lets go of your hands, turning to face you, his gaze meeting yours. His eyes are wet, tears streaking his cheeks, but there's a softness in his expression that you haven't seen in a while. He reaches out, cupping your face, his thumb stroking your cheek.
"I'm sorry," he murmurs. "I'm so sorry."
"Stop apologizing," you chide gently, a smile tugging at the corners of your lips. "I told you, it's okay."
"But—"
You shake your head, placing a finger over his lips.
"Enough." Your voice is soft, but stern. "No more talking."
His brow furrows, confusion flickering across his features. Then, he gets it, a hint of a smile tugging at the corner of his mouth. He nods, leaning down, his lips brushing against yours.
The kiss is soft, almost tentative, but there's an underlying hunger, a need that makes your skin tingle. You press closer, your arms winding around his neck, the kiss deepening, his tongue sweeping across your bottom lip.
He tastes like salt, the tears still drying on his cheeks, and the familiarity is comforting, soothing the ache in your heart. He's home. He's safe. And he loves you. Nothing else matters.
The kiss ends, the two of you gasping for breath, but you don't pull away. You stay close, your foreheads touching, his fingers tangling in your hair.
"I missed you," he murmurs.
"Me, too." You nuzzle his nose, your hands stroking his cheeks. "So much."
"M’sorry."
"I know.” You press a kiss to the tip of his nose, your fingers caressing the back of his neck. "But you're not responsible for this. None of us are. The only person to blame is the one who put the chips in your heads. You can't be held responsible for what they did."
"I know, but..."
"But nothing," you say, your tone firm. "You're a victim, Wrecker. Just like the rest of us."
He sighs, his shoulders slumping, the tension draining from his body. He's still upset, the guilt is still there, but you can feel it ebbing, the darkness fading.
"I don't blame you. None of us do,” you continue. "We're all just happy that we have you back. We're a family. We take care of each other."
Wrecker gives a small nod, the sadness in his eyes fading a little, replaced by something else. Something warmer, more hopeful.
"You're my family," he says, his voice rough with emotion. "My brothers. Omega. And you."
He pulls you into a hug, his arms wrapping around you, holding you close. "And I will never stop taking care of you. No matter what."
You bury your face in his shoulder, squeezing him tight. You can feel the tears building again, but they're different this time. They're not a product of pain or loss or fear. They're tears of happiness, of relief, of love. You close your eyes, letting the feeling wash over you, letting yourself get lost in it. You've come so far, endured so much, but here, in his arms, you're finally home.
Wrecker's fingers curl into the back of your shirt, his breathing shallow, his face buried in your hair.
"Thank you," he whispers, his voice thick.
"For what?"
"For not giving up on me."
You pull away, looking up at him, a smile on your lips.
"Never."
He smiles back, the expression brightening his entire face. You can't remember the last time you've seen him look this happy, and the sight fills you with a warm glow. This is where you belong, where you've always belonged. With him. With your family.
You kiss him, long and slow and tender, and when the kiss breaks, the two of you are both gasping for breath, the flush high on your cheeks.
"I love you," he whispers, his voice rough.
"I love you, too." You reach up, tracing his jawline with your fingertips, your eyes meeting his.
"More than anything," he continues. "And I promise, I'll never let anyone hurt you. Never again."
His voice is thick with emotion, and there's a fierceness in his gaze, a protectiveness that makes your heart skip a beat. He means it. He'll keep you safe, no matter the cost. And knowing that, believing that, fills you with an overwhelming sense of comfort. It eases the pain, the fear, the anxiety, and for the first time in weeks, you feel... whole.
You're safe. You're loved. You're home. And no matter what happens, no matter how hard things get, that will never change.
"I know." You lean up, brushing your lips against his, and his arms tighten around you. "And I'm not going anywhere. Not ever."
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#wrecker x reader#tbb wrecker#wrecker#tbb wrecker x reader#wrecker wednesday#the bad batch#clone x reader#the bad batch x reader#the clone wars#roy writes#yes there is a smut cut but i decided to take it out#it just felt wrong
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Big info drop under the cut
Ghoul
CC-1313 I Formerly Commander Jenot of Battalion 331st (destroyed)
Currently leading Special Cloneforce Hellhounds
Backstory
Upbringing
CC-1313 was raised and trained to eventually become a Clone Comander for the GAR. The majority of his childhood years were spend with his batch brothers and fellow soon to be Commanders Fox and Wolffe to which he remained a close bond of brotherhood even after the tragedy of Toydaria and his fall into absolute disloyalty of the GAR and the Republic. During this time he still used the name Jenot.
Tragedy of Toydaria
Jenot and the 331st served under Pong Krell for the first few months of the war. Even though the 331st was a very skilled and sturdy battillion it suffered great loses under the reckless and uncaring lead of the Jedi General. Shrinking it down to half it's size in the span of only three months.
While still unshaken in his loyality to the GAR and the Republic Jenot couldn't help to develop doubts and distrust in his supiriours. Struggeling a lot to keep his ranks together and his men motivated.
Eventually the separatist launched a grand attack on Toydaria and even though Pong Krell was well aware that he hadn't the capacity to stand against it he still gave the order to engage - although not leading his men himself but calling in the Jedi Knight Uros Io who at this point just recently rejoined the Jedi Order and lacked any practical expirience on the battlefield. Even though General Io was an extremly skilled Jedi, she was of no use as a General in a dire situation like this. And even though she realised her short comings and let Jenot take charge it was apparent that with lacking men and gear this battle was one that couldn't be won.
They managed to hold the line for three weeks before the overpowering seperatist forces started to push them back. Jenot watched his men die like flies and was aware that it would be a shared fate. Being pushed back to the capital the last remaining men of the 331st were killed by an airstrike. A fate Jenot almost shared but escaped due to General Io keeping him alive long enough for the arriving reinforcements to evacuate them.
Recovery on Kamino
For his recovery Ghoul and a handful severly damaged other clones of his battilion were shipped to Kamino while General Io - who suffered from great injuries herself - was treated back at the Jedi Temple. Due to a missunderstanding only Jenot was actually treated on Kamino. His recovery the only one prioritised while the rest of his men were utilised as test subjects for kaminoan expiriments - all of them lethal.
Unable to move or talk or respond in any way Jenot had to wittness the rest of his loyal battilion perish and listening to the staff in charge festered an untamable rage and hatred for the GAR, the Jedi and the Republic. His trust and loyalty shattering for ever, turning him into the man he soon would become. Even though his life was spared due to General Io, he began to nurse a life long hatred of her. Blaming her orders for the inhumane deaths of his men.
During his time in recovery Jenot developed a habit of sneaking out of the medical wing in which he was treated. Seeking silent corners for himself where he could watch the see outside rage. It was in one of those fateful nights he found himself in the company of three clone cadets who had caught rumor about "dead clone walking" - a ghoul risen from the battlefield.
Jenot, unable to overcome his anger and pain- decided to show those unsuspecting kids the reality of war and the reality of what it meant to be a clone: being property and being exploited.
Little did he know that those three exact cadets would become his new squad only two years later.
Embracing the crude name whisperd behind his back, he decided to let Jenot die and embraced the man he had been beaten into - Ghoul.
A Dead Clone Walking
Even with the loss of his arm, fingers, hearing and lower face Ghoul recoverd exeptionally swift. Making no secret out of his newfound hatred for the GAR supiriors in charge intended to get him decommissioned. Plans that fell short due to General Io convincing the Jedi Order to extent protection over the clone commander.
And while Ghoul proved himself to be difficult to work with he was also exceptionally skilled. The decision was made that he would operate solo, taking on special tasks that where considered suicide missions. Whether he failed or not was relativley not important. If he succeeded the Republic had intel, if not they had one pesky clone less to worry about. While getting accostumed to his new prosthetics and regaining back his former strength Ghoul was shortly tasked with overseeing the training of Cloneforce 99. His battlefield expirience deemed highly valuable and wanted to be taught to the expirimental unit to better their chances of success later.
After Kamino
Ghoul spend his time with achiving the impossible. Retrieving whatever was asked off him. He was well aware that the missions picked out for him were exclusively lethal ones. Yet he returned every single time to spite the GAR. To make a point. He was avidence of what the war was actually. The ugly shadow of the Republic. And he wasn't to be silenced. During this time his mind spiraled deeper and deeper into rage. His opinions became borderline traiterous and he walked a very fine line of getting caught for them. It was also the time he dettached himself from the idea of clone brotherhood. Getting rejected in the truth he had lived by fellow soldiers and shuned out, being nothing but a ghost story for them Ghoul grew resentful. Usual loyalty and empathy clones reserved for eachothers died out in Ghoul. Isolating himself even further from others, going as far as questioning if the men he called his actual brothers saw him still as an equal - Saw Ghoul as an equal - or if they only tolerated him because of what they once had.
Becoming Human again
Being pressured by Wolffe to join him for a drink at the 79's Ghoul met Odessa, a Twilek bartender and refugee from Ryloth. Having no interest in making "friends" Ghoul didn't spare Odessa much mind, just as everybody else. But fate brought both of them back together over and over again, causing a presumed dead side of Ghoul to seek out connection again. Slowly falling in love with the gentle, bubbly Twilek back on Coruscant. Giving him an actual reason to come back. A newfound motivation to keep fighting. Not for the GAR, not for the Republic but for her. Falling helplessly in love with her.
Asking her for her hand only a year after only to almost die on a mission and going mission for months afterwards. Leaving a pregnat Odessa behind, unbeknown to him. Though luckily being offered the chance to return due to the unyielding loyalty of his new unit. His Hellhounds - Wizard, 2020 and Fang - who had accompinied him during the mission and kept searching for him after being seperated and eventually succeeding in tracking him down and bringing him back. Greatly injured but alive.
Order 66 and the aftermath
During Order 66 Ghoul was still recovering from his injuries. Allowing himself to spend some time with his wife and newborn child. It didn't take him long that with the fall of the Republic the time of clones was also limted. While during the Republic he had imunity granted due to the Jedi he was defenseless under this new Imperium. Determined to keep his family save Ghoul deserted and escaped the Imperiums graps just in time.
Settling on a small, unimportant planet in the outer rim where he and Odessa build a live for themselves. Around two years after the fall of the Republic, awaiting a second a child Ghoul was visited by Rex, Echo and an old friend Howzer. The three seeked support in their cause to save clones. Ghoul, while initially unwilling to help feeling resentful over the treatment he had reviced over telling the truth even before Order 66 still, eventually agreed to help after Howzer explained that his Hellhounds had fallen victim to the Imperium aswell and were held captive.
Though never fully part of Rex's and Echos clone rebellion, Ghoul often found himself helping out.
With the years passing Ghoul and Odessa had another two kids - teh youngest seemingly sensitive to the Force. Doing what he was best at, Ghoul spend his time building a Guild for Bounty Hunters. Most of them other clones but also his oldest son and daughter. Though the latter eventual leaving the family business to travel the universe alone.
Trivia
Jenot is the polish word for Raccon dog.
Ghoul is deaf and requires hearing aids. Odessa taught him Ryl sign language. He's fluent in basic sign language and Ryl sign language
Ghoul due to his lack of a real tongue can't taste regular food. Odessa makes him super spicy protein bars that he can take onto mission with him.
The tattoo on his right arm is Odessas Lekku pattern. He got it before he asked her to marry him.
Ghoul killed a stalker of Odessa without ever telling her. It also sparked his friendship with Halo - who was an accidental wittness and helped him dispose of the body.
Ghoul is the middle brother of the Vulpus Trio- Fox, Ghoul, Wolffe
His favorite colour is azure blue. It reminds him of Odessas eyes
The order of his children is Vahan, Tarkona, Reyk and Rha
Ghoul can understand Ryl but is very rocky when it comes to speaking it. His kids love to tease him with it.
His favorite drink is Oryxxian Catsblood. An alcoholic beverage that leaves a nice warm burn in his throat despite his prostethics
Ghoul was very proud of his beard and its one of the things he misses dearly since his injury.
Vahan and Tarkona are characterwise carbon copies of Ghoul, while Reyk and Rha resemble Odessa
Odessa is @therisingdarkness character. Their kids as well as the Hellhounds are our shared effort
If you want to know more about Ghoul and Odessa check out these amazing fic of her
Five times (Ghoul x Odessa story)
#the bad batch#star wars#star wars oc#sw oc#clone trooper oc#twilek oc#tcw#sw tcw#star wars fanart#the bad batch fanart#bad batch oc#eyes draws#oc lore#my ocs#if you have any other questions feel free to ask#imma try do the same for my other babies as well#also therisingdarkness feel free to add info about odie if u got time
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Those "Palpatine falls down the stairs and dies" storylines but take away the happy ending. Oh yeah he's dead! Anyway, Mas Amedda steps in and now the Clone Wars are gonna be genuine and they're gonna be a Forever War 🥰 The clones are aging out of service 🥰🥰 The Jedi become more and more militarized against their will 🥰🥰🥰 and the Republic might build the Death Star at some point to scare the galaxy into being whole again who knows. So much going on here
#i'm already incorporating this into at least 2 of my wips because i LOVE this setting#i could talk about it all day#mostly an excuse to write a physically 50-ish cody getting on with his life but yknow
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