#this year's gift is guilt
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stillmevalz · 4 months ago
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Damn
I should have posted this on the boys' birthday 😔
Well never too late.
Happy belated birthday Vash & Knives!
🥳🎉💣🌃
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mortellanarts · 4 months ago
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The gift of life yours to impart ❀
(My second wish themed holy quintet piece which features in @dotzines magical girl themed zine! Go check it out!)
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vodkaslyme · 2 months ago
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I'm glad Fields of Mistria is at least a little more lenient with how you gain relationship w characters than Stardew was, bc as much as I love March as a character something I don't love about these kinds of games is the way their arcs/behaviour doesn't progress at all unless you're actively giving them gifts and talking to them every day (neither of which March deserves at all btw). Just rubs me the wrong way that the solution to jerk characters in these games is always to placate and rehab thier behaviour instead of the narrative/your accomplishments working towards that instead.
Idk. I think a lot of ppl have no problem kissing up to tsundere types in games but I'm like entirely too autistic and too "it's the principle of the matter" to be able to? If March is supposed to develop from being antagonistic and rude then it feels shitty that it comes from undeserved, infinite olive-branches and not just the natural progression of time/story? So at least I can mostly ignore him, tho as a consequence it takes fucking ages to increase his hearts passively that way. You can rebuff and scold him in the 2 heart event and I hope they carry that "I'm not taking your stupid ass bullshit, March" energy for the future hearts too. Because I'm out here infrastructure/farm-maxing, I'll spoil him w conversation and gifts when he figures his shit out on his own lol and we get on neutral ground.
Also I just generally don't like how abrupt his change towards you is on Friday nights. I get it's supposed to be comedic but when he's randomly only nice to you when he's drunk, and he's the only character who's Friday night interactions don't seem to have any bearing on his disposition or dialogue with you after (yet everyone else references their Friday night interactions w you and each other) it makes it feel almost non-canonical as opposed to a hidden quirk of his.
Also idk, "only nice when drunk" isnt the incentive to befriend him the devs think it is lol
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panncakes · 10 months ago
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the tragedy in night and day doesn't lie in the accident because day doesn't blame night for the accident (not really, not in the way night blames himself). the tragedy in night and day lies in day having wanted night to be his big brother but feeling like he had to take on that roll for night instead and night having wanted day to be his little brother who is as proud of him as he is of day but being unable to figure out how to get there before the accident. the tragedy lies in day not understanding why night couldn't step up until after day went blind ('im just so damn lucky to be blind') and their mother and the world started treating him like a tragedy; leaving him feeling like night has always been jealous of him and is only stepping up to take the place of the golden son of the family now that it's up for grabs. the tragedy lies in night not being able to communicate to day that he was always proud of him and that him showing up to his sporting events only after day went blind isn't because day is blind now but because he has always loved him and supported him ('this is my little brother. he's a junior athlete on the national team') but now it's impossible to convince day of his sincerity and night can't forgive himself. the tragedy of night and day lies in these brother not having been given the time to naturally grow out of this crooked brotherly dynamic that was put upon them and now they're stuck under all this weight both unable to leave the night of the accident when they're around each other. the tragedy in night and day is that tomorrow isn't guaranteed and they are too stuck in the past to look at today.
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mypunkpansexualtwin · 1 year ago
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My relationship with destiny as a franchise is coming to an end pretty much as soon as season of the Wish is done. Ending because of the corporate bullshit and repeat of the same thing with Mass Effect Andromeda that killed my love of that series. Still holding out because the annual pass was a gift, as well as other significantly heavier reasons.
But that's really just a side note.
The actual point of this post is holy fucking hell that last Imbaru Engine puzzle. I loved all of them, even if I needed a guide for stuff like the cards, or a little hint on "okay what am I missing here, point me in the right direction." But I got all of the Noodling done myself, and it only killed me once, which was satisfying as hell. Shit, even Oryx and Xivu's puzzles killed me more than that.
Given the way that the Destiny devs like to incorporate player behavior and play with Savathun seeing past the 4th wall, I like to think she was watching me/my Titan doing this and taking psychic damage at my shorthand. I'm gonna drop my horrible little notes app "chart" under a cut so y'all can also behold the Noodling.
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Asterisks are the puzzle claim, positive and negative are the truth of the claim. And again, my shorthand is just. Atrocious.
Also, I'm calling it now.
"Cayde-6" is the form our last wish dragon is gonna take when we figure out how to phrase our wish to get into the Traveler.
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pepprs · 1 year ago
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misery despair suffering etc etc
#purrs#delete later#two thoughts about separate things both causing the despair. thought / thing number 1 which i think ive talked abt on here many times before#but im saying it again: i am not good at being a friend in the ways my friends need me to be a friend. and in the ways friendship is thought#of societally i guess. i isolate myself constantly. i pull away from the opportunity to get closer with people i don’t know as well. i don’t#text back and then when im finally ready it’s been so egregiously long since it was appropriate for me to respond or reciprocate or#whatever it is i am so crushed by guilt and shame and embarrassment that i can’t bring myself to do it. i have so many unread messages and i#wont even let myself open them. and ive been like this for years. and i hurt someone very badly many years ago by being that way. and it was#more complicated than that but sometimes i remember it and how i acted and how i treated them. and i wonder sometimes if they check up on me#and i don’t want to be immature or weird or whatever for talking about it or wondering that openly. but if you do read this and you know who#you are: i am so sorry. i meant whst i said that i would never stop wishing you well and hoping the very best for you. and i hope you have#all of that and more. and im so sorry for not being brave enough to communicate with you or stick around. i really really am. and im sorry#to all the other people i have hurt by pulling away and shutting down and shrinking inside myself and not talking. ik it’s weird to post#that instead of just telling people directly but it’s the guilt. i am fully aware of how many people / groups of people i owe things to /#for but also just… miss. a lot. and want to talk to even though i won’t let myself. i don’t know why im like this and i don’t know how to#stop. but im sorry im not a good friend or even acquaintance or community member. and im talking to everyone now i guess including anyone#reading this bc god knows how many asks and messages i have on here. im sorry. i want to be a better friend. but i also never have spoons. a#and i also want to stay spoonless and cocooned on myself forever and never come out. and i hate that. i want to be a friend. i want to be#kind and giving and loving and generous in the ways you all have been with me. i want to hang out with people and send messages and be there#to lift people up and celebrate with them. but all i can muster is tapping like on social media and it’s horrific. i have gifts to make and#hello / checking in messages to reply to and roleplay starters to post and i just can’t do it right now and im scared i’ll never be able to#again. but it’s a self fulfilling prophecy. if i say i can’t do it then iwont. it’s not enougu to just be aware of it i have to act on it#and change it. but im exhausted and hurting right now and i have been for years and i need to heal first but what if this is healing.#idk. i rambled on that for much longer than i thought i would so nowim gonna say the second thing in a separate post. and it’ll be weird to#post about that in light of this and it’ll be weird to post this at all. but its been weighing on me so heavily today and i don’t want#anyone to think im ignoring them or not aware of being like this or whatever. and posting into the void is easier than telling individual#people to your faces even though i know it’s cowardly. im really truly sorry. i will try to get better once i have the strength to try.#actually yeah no not gonna say the second thing yet. it would be weird to say it now. this needs to sit a little first
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happywitch416 · 11 months ago
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Game? No.
Write? No.
Art? No.
Glare hatefully at my phone because it also does not have whatever my brain wants? Sure, why not.
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asinglesock · 11 months ago
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The church music production is actually taking a lot out of me. I am really excited about it and it feels like having back something that I'd lost, but I'm so tired.
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raylangivins · 1 year ago
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Haven’t really formulated these thoughts into any coherent observation yet but something something East of Eden’s depiction of religious guilt offers a sense of forgiveness that makes one understand why people find comfort in religion versus Brideshead Revisited’s depiction of religious guilt being this frustrating and off-putting obstacle that drives all the characters to an eternal state of melancholy.
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herawell · 1 year ago
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fleastinger · 1 year ago
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#if i told you i could not fall asleep on your birthday could you believe me?#that i slept in the jamaica shirt?#i have no idea if that was your gift to me or if it was for my uncle or someone else#i have your shot glass that you so haphazardly gave to me#but tbh i was such a coward i couldnt bear to touch and give out all of your gifts#it feels wrong. a reminder that I fucked things up with us#i dont even know what i want anymore or if i can get through this#i feel so alone wallowing at the current state of things#im constantly short of money and overspending like crazy#i keep thinking about the guilt of it all and the knowledge that you wouldn't be so happy hearing from me if you knew what happened#and what i continue to do#i just feel so lost after realizing i ripped apart of my soul out by leaving you#and knowing that i did something that had broken it beyond repair if i didnt go#just. hoping your year is better#and now i cant stop thinking of the ways i freely gave my love to you without thinking#how we shouldve been serious sooner and that i couldve been with you if i was better#better at controlling myself or better at admitting that i was struggling#oh my sweet...it doesnt even matter the little things like my sex drive being higher than yours#or the fomo id have about not doing things when you let me socialize and would join/invite me to things#its hard to confront giving my niece a gift from you and face the fact that the trip wouldve made me open up#i was just. too cowardly to let go of my ex.
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justalittlebluetiefling · 2 years ago
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As someone that didn't play or watch anyone play TLoU, I'm having so much fun watching the show and the reactions of people that do know the game
I was just talking to my sister in law about this the other day, because she also has not played the game, but she's really enjoying the show. I was telling her that I'm both jealous and not jealous of people who haven't played the game. Like, on the one hand, I have a general idea of what to prepare myself for each week, but I'm sure it's obvious that I'm still shocked every week. On the other hand, it can be really fun to not know what's going to happen next. I would have been very into this show even if I hadn't already played the game(s) and it's been super fun seeing new people get into it.
Obviously I'm still into it now lol this is such a good adaptation.
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hoperays-song · 2 years ago
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Sing Trauma Playlists:
Playlist Link:
https://open.spotify.com/playlist/0cwtEKWKCUcSaWHI0hmDfo?si=iMNJl4tnSBKgrGc75qhtHA&nd=1
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Song list:
IDK You Yet - Alexander 23
Heather - Conan Gray
Dancing With Your Ghost - Sasha Alex Sloan
Remember That Night? - Sara Kays
You Broke Me First - Tate McRae
Body - Jordan Suaste
If I Don’t Laugh, I’ll Cry - Frawley
Honey and Glass - Peyton Cardoza
Devil Doesn’t Bargain - Alec Benjamin
Sweet Hibiscus Tea - Penelope Scott
Prom Dress - Mxmtoon
Are You Satisfied? - MARINA
Average - Sushi Soucy
Poster Kid - PEACH MARTIME
Pretty Hurts - Beyoncé
Try - Colbie Caillat
Jar of Hearts - Christina Perri
Moral of the Story - Ashe
Play Date - Melanie Martinez
Hurry, Hurry - Air Traffic Controller
Broken - Isak Danielson
Falling Apart - Michael Schulte
***an important note in the tags***
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arctic-hands · 1 year ago
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[Image Description: initial tweet by Jesuro, @ JesuroKun. It's says, in allcaps, "Hey artists what does your family think about your art". Beneath the tweet is a screencap of Skipper, the CGI Adelie (?) Penguin from the Madagascar movies and the Penguins Of Madagascar cartoon series. He is popping out from a hole in a wooden box, pointing a flipper straight ahead and his beak open in speech. In reply, kosa [cannot tell what that emoji is on my phone, it's a red rectangle at an angle] 305, @ KosoNah, tweets "My dad saw my skill in art and said I should have y into NFTs and I said no, those are scams. And he said 'I know. I want you to scam people'". End I.D.]
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straykats · 4 months ago
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🧍🏻‍♂️🧍🏻‍♂️🧍🏻‍♂️
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shessoft · 4 months ago
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y'all i was this 🤏🏼 close to paying too much money for the Regina funko pop
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