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letmereedusyou · 2 days ago

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i’m not yours - part 8

summary: Daryl and you are (were?) friends. He dated Leah. You told him you loved him and things fell apart. Will it ever go back to normal?

words: 2.3k

warnings: mentions of abuse, injuries

A/N: Good day, everyone! I've been literally working on this for a couple of days, editing and adding shit all the time. My partner has helped me with it, he's such a gem <3 I hope you enjoy it!

I would also like to thank everyone who has followed me and liked my shit, it is much appreciated! With your help, I somehow got to 68 followers and over 600 likes which is incredible! Thank you, muffins! <3

Read the previous part here!

A few days later

Ribs hurting, body throbbing. Every single muscle screams for help with each move you make. Getting up from bed was a challenge enough, but taking a shower was even worse. You could barely move your limbs around, not to mention bending down or even sitting. The mirror image you see in the morning is somewhat depressing. Standing in front of it, in your black underwear, you assessed the damage with a pained gaze. The cuts and bruises were almost too much to look at. Their shades of purples, pinks, and reds were sticking out like a sore thumb in the morning light sifting through the window. They weren't only covering your body, but also stretching from ear to cheek on one side, with a big fat lip as a cherry on top. You feel a sharp pain in your side when you breathe in —a telltale sign of a few broken ribs.

That evening walk last night wasn't a good idea after all, you thought to yourself.

Moving at a snail's pace, you put on trousers and a grey hoodie, wincing in pain every now and then. Drawing a hood up, you cover most of your face. You weren’t trying to get any attention drawn to you, oh no. Leaving the house, you head towards the mess hall to eat your breakfast. Your hands were in your pockets. All the way down the street, you looked at your slow feet moving on the ground. You could hear people whispering about you. It was clear that somehow they already knew about your injuries. Maybe someone caught a glimpse when you were coming home last night, stumbling through the street. Or maybe you just weren't as good at hiding it as you thought you were.

Out of the blue, you feel a strong hand on your shoulder. You turn around with your fists up, almost hitting the person in the face before you realise that it was Gabriel - the community priest. You swallow hard, and you quickly put your fists down, packing them back into your pockets.

"Y/N, what happened?" He asks, a worried look on his face as he steps a bit closer to look at your face. As a respectful person that he is, he doesn’t touch you or move too close. He just points at your face, his eyes darting to the bruising and cut lip.

"Nothing," you mumble.

"That nothing sure looks like something," he retorted, examining you.

"I am fine, father," you say, stepping away from him and clearing your throat. "But may I suggest praying for all the wicked tonight."

"If we confess our sins, He is faithful, and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness," Gabriel quotes a Bible to you and smiles a little.

"It's not my sins we have to worry about, father."

You say, turning around and leaving him standing there, visibly confused. You walk all the way down the street, turning onto a gravel path that winds a little to the left, and you get to the mess hall. By mess hall, you meant the biggest building in Alexandria where some tables and chairs were put down, alongside a modest buffet so people could get their food before work. There usually wasn't a lot to choose from, but no one complained - food was a blessing these days, no matter how bad or good it tasted.

Getting a clean, but worn-out white plate, you put some scrambled eggs on it, a rare sight in the zombie world. You guess someone found some powdered eggs somewhere during the supply run. You don't complain and take some onto your plate, heading to sit at one of the empty tables.

Your jaw hurts as you slowly eat your modest, bland breakfast. The only thing you could eat, really. Soft enough so there's not much chewing involved. You dart your eyes up carefully to look around, and you spot Daryl’s crossbow, poking above the bustling crowd. He barely glances at you across the dining hall, and you know he probably is here to grab his food pack quickly before heading out on a supply run. It was busy anyway, so you weren't surprised he would not see you. You were just another face in the crowd. You didn’t expect him to pay much attention to you. Especially after your past arguments. And his own relationship explosion a few days ago. You resort to going back to your own plate.

All the hope of people not noticing you or your injuries dwindles when you overhear some hushed voices from the table next to the open buffet counter.

"You see her face?"

"Yeah, looks awful."

"Wonder who fucked that up."

"I’d hate to see the other guy."

You try not to react to the whispers and cover up more with your hoodie. You keep on eating, blocking out the noise as much as you can. You usually didn't care about people talking about you. You learned that it didn't matter. But somehow, having been beaten up and having clearly visible injuries made you uncomfortable and anxious when people stared and talked about it.

Lost in your thoughts, you get brought back to reality with a can of soda clash and hiss against the floor from next to the buffet counter. Startled by the noise, your eyes shoot up to look in the direction.

Your eyes meet Daryl's in the crowd. He is looking at you; his eyebrows fly up before he scowls. Horror and concern quickly flash across his face. You look back down to the plate, hoping he doesn’t react, pulling your hood instinctively to hide more. You can hear Daryl's loud grumble even from the place you were sitting, and as you peep around your hood, he's already moving quickly, slipping past everyone. You start to dissociate, and that built-up anxiety starts to blister and pop inside you.

Please don’t...

Please, don’t make a scene...

Maybe he isn’t coming over.

You are broken out of your mind by his hand slamming on the table next to your tray. Daryl’s eyes flashed across your face. Anger, no… rage, completely enveloped his eyes.

“Who did this to you?!” His growl resounded through the mess hall, and you almost flinched at how aggressive that sounded.

„Daryl, please…”

„Do not ‚Daryl, please’ me!” You were sure that if eyes could kill, his would leave you on the floor with two X's instead of eyes.

„I don’t know. It was dark. I didn’t see,” you try to explain. „Please, stop making a scene. I really don’t need any more eyes on me.”

Daryl looks around cautiously. A lot of people were paying attention to you both now, and it made you uncomfortable. He saw that. He knew that. He pursed his lips a little and then gave out a loud exasperated sigh. Before you know it, you’re dragged by your arm towards the doors. His grip was strong and relentless—it almost made you wince in pain. Your head swung down to cover your embarrassment and redness in your cheeks.

Once you are outside and out of the view of all the people, Daryl pulls on your hood, taking it off fully. He stands there, looking at your bruise and your cut lip, as if he were assessing the damage, taking in the sight before him. He steps closer, taking your chin into his fingers, and tilts your head to the side.

„Who the fuck did you piss off lately?” He asks, his gaze falling onto your eyes. When he doesn’t get a response, he scoffs and lets go of your chin. „I need to know who did this.”

„I told you already. I don’t-,” you say, rolling your eyes.

„How bad is it?”

The question falls from his mouth before you even get to finish the sentence. You think about it for a minute, trying to figure out if you should tell him about your broken bones or if you should just leave it alone. Why would you tell him? What’s that going to do? It will just piss him off even more.

„It’s just my face,” you say, and you hear an immediate dry laugh rolling out of his lips.

„Liar,” he says.

You stare at each other for a minute or two. Your throat goes dry, and you bite your lip, making yourself curse and wince in pain. His icy blue eyes were way too much to handle for you. It felt like he could just blow up at any second if you kept being silent, so you muster up some courage. Taking a short breath, you get ready to speak, but Daryl stops you by putting his hand up in front of you.

„Your face just told me everything I needed to know,” he grumbles.

„What?” your voice sounds squeaky, and your eyes widen in surprise.

„You can’t breathe deeply. Your face grimaced when you tried to. You have broken ribs,” he says confidently, and you're stunned at how he reads you like a book without even trying hard. „You shouldn’t even be on your feet if this happened just last night.”

„How did you—?” you ask, but you already know the answer. Of course he’d know. He probably suffered it himself at the hand of his father. Maybe even worse than this.

„It looks fresh; the cut on your lip is not healed yet and still red, which means that it can’t be more than a day or two old.”

„You a doctor or summin’?” You mumble, and you pull your hood up again. You look at him, fiddling with the sleeve of your hoodie. His expression is almost unreadable, but you can see concern and worry on his face.

He rubs his temple before sighing.

„Let’s get you home.”

He takes your arm in his hand, more gently than when he pulled you up from the table but still hard enough that it made you silently wince at his touch. Though painful, his touch soothed you. Somehow, his concern made you feel like there was still a bit of compassion left in his heart for you. As he guided you towards your house, you didn’t protest. Truth be told, you are tired; you want to lie down or at least find a comfortable position to be in.

All the way down the street, Daryl stayed quiet. Didn’t ask questions, just walked beside you, his hand on your arm loosened a bit, so it didn’t hurt you. Once your house comes into view, your eyes dart around to see if any people are watching. They were. From everywhere. Of course… This wouldn’t go unnoticed—you and Daryl suddenly beside each other after months with no real contact. Plus, the hood on your head probably didn’t help.

Daryl walks into your house, drags you inside, and slams the doors behind him. You jump a little at the sound, but you keep your eyes glued to the ground.

„Look at me,” he says, his commanding tone making you bring your eyes up almost immediately.

He steps closer to you and once again pulls your hood off of your head with one swift motion. Daryl’s eyes glance all over your face, as if trying to read through the wounds about the people who did this to you. He takes a deep breath and huffs quietly before stepping away and motioning to the living room and the couch. You take a few steps and then lower yourself on the couch carefully, trying not to get any pain.

„Here,” Daryl says and puts one hand on your shoulder and the other wraps around your waist carefully to help you move down the couch into a half-seated, almost laid-down position on one of your sides. Your legs get put on the coffee table. „The best position to make sure you’re not hurting.”

„Thanks,” you mumble quietly.

„What do you need?” he asks. „Water? Pillows? Books?”

„All of the above.”

He huffs a half laugh and stands up, disappearing from view. You wondered why he’s helping you. He’s been absent from your life for months, and now he’s back, and at first glance, you’d say nothing had happened between you two. But you knew it wasn’t the truth. You argued. Badly. You couldn’t just go back to normal that easily, could you? Your mind also itched to ask about the fight he had with Leah. You wanted to ask if it was about you or if you just dreamt the entire thing, but you bit your tongue.

Daryl shows up with pillows from your bed, a book from the bedside table, and then goes to the kitchen to get some water. He brings you a glass and puts it on the armrest of the sofa.

„You should sleep in an upright position; it will be more comfortable,” he says, propping you with pillows on each side.

„You mean I sleep here?”

„Yeah,” he nods. „When my pops used to beat me up, breaking some ribs, I spent a lot of time in a position in which you are right now. It helped to ease the pain a bit.”

„Right,” you say and nod affirmatively. "How long?"

"As long as it takes for your ribs to feel better."

He stands there for a bit in complete silence, scanning your body like he had x-rays in his vision and could see the broken bones through your clothes. When he looks into your eyes, you could've sworn you saw some emotions that reminded you of the old times.

Care.

He quickly averts his gaze after less than a second and he nods once again, heading towards the front doors. He reaches for the door handle, but before he leaves, he speaks again.

„I am going to find out who did this. I promise they will get what they deserve.”

#daryl dixon #daryl dixon imagine #the walking dead daryl #daryl dixon x reader #daryl x female reader #the walking dead #twd daryl #daryl fanfiction #twd daryl dixon #daryl dixon fanfiction

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miizuzu · 3 days ago

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Gone

This is a one shot that creeped into my mind. Let's just say, everything that can go wrong, will go wrong. I never see Satoru this way but he's just too obsessed. I usually don't put warnings but I think this is a bit much.

Warnings: noncon, !ncest, v!rginity lost, self harm, death, angst, angst, angst, angst, angst. Just dark as fuck.

“She will be my bride when we grow up.”

Satoru said to his mother, who just gave birth to you, his gleaming eyes not leaving your tiny body in her arms.

“Oh Darling, you can't marry her, she's your little sister.”

“But why not? I want to protect her forever. Just like how father protects you, mother.”

“You will always protect her.”

Satoru smiles to himself as he leans in to kiss your puffy cheeks. He had decided at 5 years old that he would always be by your side.

Fast forward a few months, you are now 6 months old, sitting in the living room with your toys. Your relatives were told you looked just like Satoru, with the same hair and eye color. They couldn't wait to see you, they had you surrounded and you started crying. Everyone tried their best to calm you down but nothing worked, not until Satoru rushed to your side and hugged you. You finally calmed down and started smiling and giggling, Satoru slots you between his legs as he sat behind you with his arms protectively around your tiny body.

You would cry all the time when Satoru wasn't around, it would break his heart every morning when he had to leave for kindergarten, watching you look at him with your tearful eyes, makes him never want to leave. He would rush home when school is over, the 2 of you would hug and play together until it was time for bed. Satoru would always sneak into your room and sleep with you. Your parents would get mad at him but you would cry until he was allowed to come back, they gave up and thought it was fine since you were both young and just let it be.

Fast forward a few years, you are now 6 and entering elementary school, Satoru is now in grade 6. He would come hang out with you during recess and lunch. The other kids would not dare to disturb the 2 of you. He was the smart and good looking boy which all the girls would talk about, you were the perfect little doll the boys would like to know. Satoru would never let you out of his sight, he never lets any boy get too close to you and all the kids know that.

The 2 of you would always cling to each other, you are not allowed to call him “brother”, Satoru would get angry at you if you don't call him by his first name. It has always been just the 2 of you, that was until Suguru Geto came along. You call him Sugu-ni, and he lets you. He acts as if he was also your older brother, and both of them would drive the boys away together.

As Satoru grows older, he learns about sex and the feeling of affection. There were girls that would always confess their feelings to him, but he would always turn them down, he doesn't need anyone other than you.

Your parents told him he should distance himself from you, or you would not be able to make any friends. And when Satoru said you didn't need anyone else other than him, they scolded him and sent him away. They thought it was for his own good, and yours.

As the years go by, Satoru keeps in touch with you everyday over the phone. He also entrusted Suguru to watch after you and make sure no one would take you away.

He played by your parents' rules until they let him return, by then he's already 28. He kept his return a secret from you, wanting to surprise you in person. He was furious when he got home and realized you had moved out. Your parents wouldn't let him know where or who you moved in with.

He turned to Suguru, the only person he could trust. Showing up at his house only to be in for a surprise.

“Sugu! You're home ear-”

You stopped before finishing your sentence. Staring into the cold eyes of Satoru, your brother who always loved you unconditionally. You almost thought he was someone else by how cold his eyes gaze was, if not for the hair and eyes that mirror yours, you'd thought it was a stranger.

“Welcome back, brother.”

That's when Satoru snaps, he picks you up and slams the door behind him. He ignores your protest for him to put you down. He kicks off his shoes and walks further into the house, with you hoisted on his shoulder, your struggling didn't affect him one bit. He finds your room, he walks in and locks the door behind him. He throws you onto your bed and you try to crawl towards your phone which you left by the window ledge. He notices right away and pulls you back by your ankles.

“What are you doing?! Let me go!!”

You try to struggle away from him but his strength easily overpowers yours. Satoru takes the sleeves of your sweater and triple knots them together. He could see this sweater doesn't belong to you, it was way too big. He was seeing red, wanting to rip it right off of you and shred it to pieces, but it did help with binding your hands which was why he left it intact.

“Has he kissed you?”

You blushed and turned your head away, that was not the answer he was hoping for, he wanted to hear you deny even if it's just a lie, if you said it, he would believe it. He grits his teeth and grabs both your cheeks with his huge hand, tilting your head back to face him as he kisses you. Your eyes blown wide open before squeezing them shut and struggling more, your words are muffled from his attack on your lips, forcing his tongue into your mouth. You bite him and he grunts but does not pull back, the metallic taste swirls on your tongue as he invades your mouth.

You were crying when he finally let go of your lips, blood and drool the corner of your mouth as Satoru wipes his own with the back of his free hand.

“Has he fucked you?”

His question shocks you, your eyes snap onto his, staring right into his with a hint of fear in your eyes.

“No!!”

“No?”

“NO!!! Now let go of me!!!”

His hand lets go of your chin only to grab your hands to pin them above your head. His other hand goes to the bottom of your sweater and he pulls it up, only to reveal you were not wearing a bra under.

“I don't believe you.”

He leans down to suck on one of your nipples, then the other, leaving bite marks on your breasts as his hand now tugs at the waistband of your shorts.

“Satoru STOP!!!!”

He had enough of you trying to stop him. He yanks your shorts off in one powerful tug then moves to rip your panties right off.

“Satoru please, you know we can't do this. You're my brother. That fact won't change.”

“As much as I miss your voice, I've had enough of you trying to stop me.”

He takes the ripped panties and shoves it in your mouth, everything you say is now muffled. You are still trying your hardest to push him off. He had become bigger, he was tall as a teenager but now he's tall and toned. There was no way you could win against him.

Tears were rolling down your cheeks as you glared at him, hoping he would come to his senses. He had buried his face back into the valley of your breasts, leaving his mark over every part of your skin. He was using his whole torso to weigh down on you, you felt his free hand moving again, his hand now between your legs. You are protesting again, you could feel his fingers brushing against your labia.

He could feel your heart racing, his hand now directly touching and rubbing your clit, you squeeze your eyes shut again, almost wishing this was just a nightmare. How could your brother who you love so much be doing this to you?

“Y/N. I've loved you ever since the first time I laid eyes on you. You're mine. No one else is allowed to have you. Even our parents can't stop me.

Then you hear it, him undoing his belt buckles, his heavy jeans hitting the ground. You could feel him rubbing against you, his boxers being the only barrier that separated you from him. You kept shaking your head, but he's too far gone.

He slips his leaking cock out of his boxers, now directly rubbing against your walls. You were squirming, trying your hardest to push away from him. He finally lifts himself off of your body, you tried your best to roll away only for him to easily pin you down again as he pulled you to the edge of the bed. He had his cock lined to your pussy and with one strong thrust, he slotted himself in your tight pussy.

Your eyes widened as tears spilled, your screams were muffled, your back arched off the bed. He finally looks down, he sees you bleed. He started laughing, his eyes widened as he realized that he had finally made you his.

“Am I your first? As it should be. You are MINE!!!”

Satoru has lost his mind, hips kept pumping in and out of you, your muffled screams and moans only sent him further down to the point of no return.

Your tears kept flowing, the ripped piece of cloth in your mouth has been soaked with your own saliva, so much that it is spilling from the corners of your mouth.

Satoru was so close, his orgasm creeping in closer and closer.

“I'm gonna cum inside, you will be mine.”

You panic now you keep kicking your legs and his hands fly to knees to hold them down. That's when you heard noise coming from your living room. Suguru is home.

“Babe? I'm home.”

Suguru was wondering where you were. You would normally welcome him home, he checked his phone and you didn't say you were going out. That's when he saw the shoes in the middle of the living room.

“Y/N? Is someone here?”

He hears you now and panic sets in, the race to your room only to be locked outside.

“Y/N! Open the door!”

He can hear your muffled cries, he knows something is not right. He kept banging at the door, when he realized you weren't able to open it, he tried breaking the door down.

Satoru knows he's running out of time, he picks up his pace and keeps thrusting into you, he could feel himself about to burst.

“Cumming!! Nghhh!!!”

He cums the same moment Suguru breaks through the door. Satoru keeps thrusting as he cums ropes and ropes of hot cum into your tight, pulsing walls. Your eyes have lost focus as tears and drool streams down your cheeks.

Suguru rushes to your side and rips Satoru off of you before punching him square in the face.

Satoru falls back onto the ground, his cock covered in cum and your blood. All he does is laugh, laughing menacingly as he wipes the blood from the corner of his lips.

Suguru sees the mess between your legs and his heart sink, grabbing your blanket to cover over you.

“What the hell do you think you're doing???!”

“I'm only taking back what belongs to me.”

“You're crazy! You guys are siblings! She's your sister for fuck sake!!”

“I've always seen her as a woman. Being blood related means nothing to me.”

“Have you thought about how she would feel?! I thought you were supposed to protect her!”

“That's what I trusted you to do until you tried taking what was MINE!!!”

Satoru was huffing, Suguru hugged you and pulled the piece of cloth out of your mouth. You cling to Suguru, Satoru got and tried walking towards you.

“...... I hate you.”

Satoru freezed in his spot. His expression filled with hurt but he smiles gently. He never intended to hurt you, he had always loved you. He couldn't stand you saying you hate him, he stumbles back.

You shoveled in your spot, you could feel his cum leaking out of you, you winzed and tried to get up but your legs gave out. You got Suguru to take you to the bathroom and you locked yourself inside.

Suguru had dragged Satoru out of your room and sat him down in the living room. He wasn't sure how to feel towards Satoru, he thought Satoru would understand.

The 2 men's attention was on you when they heard the sound of items falling in the bathroom. Suguru tried to open the door but it was locked, they both panicked when you didn't answer. They decided to kick the door down.

Once the door was open, their eyes fell on you. You were laying on the ground motionless in a pool of blood with a big gash on your wrist. Suguru instantly went to call for an ambulance while Satoru froze by the door. He walks towards you to grab you only to be pulled back by Suguru.

“YOU DID THIS!! DON'T YOU FUCKEN TOUCH HER!”

Suguru tried to tie a towel around your cut to stop it from bleeding but the towel was instantly soaked and stained with your blood.

You were rushed to the hospital and your parents rushed there, your mother went straight to Satoru and slapped him across the face. You father tried everything he could to calm your mother down. While everyone waited outside the operation room for any updates.

It had been a couple of hours before the doctor came out. He explained to your parents that even though they managed to stop you from bleeding further, you've lost a lot of blood and was suggesting that you're brain dead. Your mother collapsed when the doctor told her they also found signs of rape.

“We should have kept her safe and away from you…”

Satoru had just lost everything. His mother hates him and his father couldn't even look at him, and most importantly, he lost you. You were his reason for living, all he wanted was to be close to you, he never thought he would go this far.

The doctors had moved you to a room, you were hooked up to many different types of machines, all trying to keep you alive.

Your mother was admitted to the hospital too for collapsing and your father stayed with her. Suguru was talking to the doctor to see if there was anything else that could be done.

Satoru sat there, staring at you with all the machines attached to your tiny body. An idea had struck him, he locks the door to the room and bared it with the furniture's before going to your bed side. Grabbing your hand to place on his cheeks.

“Since we can't be together this life, I will just have to find you again in the next one.”

He pulls the power of your life support, the sound of beeping fills the room. Suguru and the doctor tried to get in only to be bared outside. Satoru breaks a glass and took a broken piece and stabbed himself in the neck.

By the time Suguru made it in the room it was already too late, both you and Satoru lay there, lifeless. Your father heard the news and rushed over from your mother's room, only to find both his kids, dead.

The funeral services was held a few weeks later. Your mother had lost the light in her eyes, they decided to have you and Satoru buried beside each other. You were family afterall, Satoru finally got his wish to be next to you forever.

Suguru made a promise at your grave; if there really was a next life, he would do everything he can to protect and love you, he will not let Satoru near you if it's the last thing he do.

Well... Now that it got out of my system I feel a bit better now... This is my first angst. Leave me comments of what you think, was it too much? I kinda thought it was... Sorry Satoru...

#angst #satoru gojo #satoru gojo x reader #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #getou suguru x reader

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xwinterwidowx · 22 hours ago

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short little sonadow/shadonic fic!! lmk if you want more! pls dont take this as your own writing-reblogging is fine and appreciated!

"Sometimes," Shadow murmurs. "You cant save everyone. I know you want to. I know you feel like you have to. But you cant sometimes. And you just..." he finishes bandaging Sonic's hand. "have to accept that."

"I could have. I just... I could have."

"I know." He hugs him, and Sonic just breaks down.

"I could have saved them," he sobs. "I could have-I could have gotten them out of the way."

"You cant save everyone, Soni," he mumbles. "I know you want to. But you cant."

"Theyre dead because of me, Shadow," he chokes on a sob. "Theyre dead because I was too slow."

"Youre not. I wouldnt lie to you. You know that, dont you?" Sonic nods and bites his lip as he stops crying for a bit. "Dont do that. Bite my shoulder if you have to. I dont want you hurting yourself."

"I want to feel what they felt." Shadow lifts Sonic's face up so he could look him in the eyes.

"Please. At least squeeze my hand. Youre not alone in this. I love you."

"I love you," Sonic mumbles, his quills all messed up from the fight, some digging into his skin. Shadow sees this and his eyes widen.

"Ill be right back," Shadow kisses his bandaged hand, and goes to get a brush. He comes back and Sonic rests his head on his shoulder. Shadow gently runs the brush through his quills.

"Mmn..." he grunts in pain as they get straightened out.

"Sorry."

"Mm-mm." His eyes flutter shut and starts to fall asleep. Shadow carries him to his bed. "Don' go..." Sonic mumbles as he notices Shadow leaving.

"Just sleep."

"Please... Don' wanna be alone." Shadow sighs and walks over to his bed. He curls up into his boyfriend, whos almost fast asleep.

"Love you," Sonic mumbles, resting his head on the white fur on Shadow's chest.

"I love you," he kisses Sonic's nose. Sonic quickly falls asleep, but Shadow lays lying awake. A million questions and thoughts run through his head.

If this happened once, it could happen again.

I love him too much to lose him.

Why didnt I stop him?

He needs a break.

What if he kills himself trying to save someone?

Shadow doesnt sleep until he feels Sonic grab his hand.

"Youre thinkin' again..." Sonic mumbles sleepily.

"Go to sleep, Soni..." he holds his hand.

"You first," he yawns. "M'already tired."

"Sonic-"

"You need rest too, Shads. Even ultimate life forms do," he yawns again.

"Stop making fun of me," he grumbles.

"M'not. But youre my ultimate life form. Who needs t'sleep."

"Fine," Shadow scoffs. "Ill sleep."

"Love you," Sonic closes his eyes when Shadow does. The two of them fall asleep at almost the same time. They wake up in the morning with switched positions. Sonic is under Shadow, whos resting his head on his arm. Neither of them would ever admit this, but they were the most comfortable during slow mornings like that, where they could be themselves. Sonic wakes up before Shadow, and doesnt move an inch. He knows how rare it is to get Shadow to actually sleep, so he stays quiet and just watches his boyfriend sleep. He ends up falling back asleep and waking up to the feeling of his quills being brushed.

"Shads?" he yawns with a soft smile.

"Mhm?" he mumbles, not stopping what he was doing.

"Are you... brushing my quills?"

"Yes," he replies.

"Why?"

"Because I love you." Sonic sits up and smiles at him, still half-asleep.

"C'mere," Shadow pulls Sonic onto him, the latter letting out a soft shriek.

"Shads! I'm gonna fall!"

"Don't worry, you baby," Shadow scoffs and rolls his eyes.

"You're the worst," Sonic grumbles and buries his face into his quills.

"Fuck- you idiot! What are you doing?" Shadow pulls Sonic's face back so he can inspect it. Sonic just whines and drops his head down onto his boyfriend's chest.

"It was comfortable there," he grumbles.

"You could've hurt yourself!" Shadow scoffs. He isn't mad, he's just concerned. Sonic would kill himself doing the stupidest things if Shadow wasn't around to knock some sense into him.

"M'sorry," Sonic murmurs, looking up to meet Shadow' red eyes.

"I'm not mad, Soni. I just wan-need you to be careful."

"I will. For you."

"I love you," Shadow kisses Sonic's forehead.

"I love you more. You beautiful ultimate life form." Shadow just laughs and they lay in comfortable silence. They were always comfortable around each other.

#sonic #sonic the hedgehog #shadow fanfic #shadow the hedgehog #shadow the ultimate lifeform #sonadow fanfiction #sonadow #shadonic #fanfics #fanfic #sonic fanfiction

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sukunastoy · 1 day ago

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Only Love Can Hurt Like This, Chapter 1, Part 1 (CEO! Sukuna x Fem! Reader, MDNI)

Continuation from the Prologue Here

⬇️PLEASE READ BEFORE STARTING THE STORY! ⬇️

Modern age AU, no curses. Sukuna still has his tattoos, but his face ones are carefully hidden. This story is set in Japan, and I've done my best to implement real life into it. For example, tattoos in Japan are still taboo, and people associate them with the yakuza, so its not normal to see everyday people have them. Though I know I won't have all the details of modern day life in Japan correct, I hope you still enjoy.

Pairings: CEO Sukuna x Fem Reader Content/Trigger warnings: In full on the Prologue chapter Wordcount: 4.1k+

This chapter is a backstory of how Toji and Reader met. Since Toji is not necessarily a main character in this story, I don't want to focus on a lot of detail for this backstory. But it needs to be told.

Toji and Reader are in high school, Toji is a senior, and reader is a freshman. Though I don't specifically put anything into detail, since everyone is a minor, you get the basic idea. Toji is not a good guy.

Since this is backstory, Sukuna isn't mentioned or appears in this chapter at all.

Sighing quietly, you stowed your street shoes in a cubby before putting the school slippers on. This semester came up too quickly. Your parents decided to move over the summer, so you were starting this new school year with no friends or acquaintances. Sure, making new friends wasn't the most impossible of tasks, but it could be difficult. Sitting alone in class was for the weirdos.

Not to mention, picking a club to participate in wasn't easy either. Usually, you and your friends would have joined in something together, so it didn't even matter what the club was. Now, you actually had to find something you might enjoy for the next few years to make friends. Browsing the choices during the first of many weekly assemblies, it was stressful to pick. After reading another pamphlet and being disappointed, you turned from the booth to head to the next, but bumped into what felt like a wall, nearly smooshing your nose into your face.

"Woah princess, those eyes of yours don't work?"

Rubbing your nose and cursing under your breath, you glanced up to the tall guy you just collided with, your cheeks easily becoming speckled with your embarrassment. "Uh, they work just fine. You're the one just standing in the way." you retort, trying to regain your dignity while others looked over in curiosity of the small situation. "And don't call me princess."

The guy chuckled and turned to fully face you, putting his hands up in a defensive way. "Calm down, no need to get all fussy. I'm just teasin'." He grinned and put a palm atop your head, slightly ruffling your hair that you had spent over an hour on this morning. A pretty little pout pulled your lips down and you swatted his hand away, bashful at his actions. "Well, excuse you." You snort out, lifting your nose and passing by him, though on the inside you were riddled with panic.

The guy watched as you walked away, though he couldn't deny he was intrigued with your little attitude. He smirked while licking his upper row of teeth before following. "You know, I haven't seen you before, new this year?"

Your frazzled expression didn't go unnoticed by him as you tried to walk faster, wanting to ignore him. Of course, him being much taller, it didn't take long for him to catch up with you once again. "M'guessing those ears of yours don't work either?" he teased, flicking your left ear gently. You whipped around to face him, cheeks puffed in irritation and shyness. "Why are you following me?"

"Just tryna' be friendly." he chuckled and leaned over, placing his palms on his knees to lower his face to yours. It only made the blush on your face darken.

"You think it's friendly to follow girls shorter than you?"

"Short girls that are cute." He smirked, tossing his head lightly to knock the black lochs from his eyes. His cockiness made you fidget and you tried to smile in defiance, not wanting to be flustered by this obviously older and attractive guy. Was he a senior?

"Name's Fushiguro, Toji." He stepped back to offer a little bow and you looked left and then right, afraid people might be watching this little interaction. Why was this guy talking to you? You were already feeling weird to be without your friends from middle school, and now this cute upperclassman was introducing himself to you?

"I, I'm L/N, F/N." You managed, giving a little polite bow in return. It wasn't a bad thing for someone to want to know your name, right? Maybe making new friends wouldn't be so difficult after all.

"So, you new here?"

You nodded while letting out a sigh. "Yeah, moved from Kyoto. My dad got a new business opportunity. So he goes wherever the money is. Just sucks because I had the same friends since I was a little kid, and now I have to start high school with no one." you gestured with you arms before letting them flop to your sides.

"That does suck. Highschool is a big deal, and to go in alone isn't that great. But hey, you know me now, yeah?" He smirked while pushing a thumb into his chest. "Well, I don't know you." you laughed, though smiling with fondness for at least having someone introduce themselves to you already on the first day. "Lets hang out after school, then you can get to know me."

"Damn, so your parents must be loaded then." Toji exclaimed after you presented more information about your home life, or lack of home life to be honest. "I guess. They're pretty absorbed into their jobs. I'm lucky if we even have dinner together a couple times a month. Usually my dad is at his office still working through the evening and my mom is visiting some of her clients." you shrugged while sitting on the bleachers with Toji near the track field. "My parents have basic jobs. They come home stressed and bitch and fight with each other and then my dad passes out drunk most of the time." He laughed as if it was just normal. "That really sucks." You murmured, looking to him with sympathy though he didn't seem to mind his home life.

"Hey, so one of my friends is having a party, or rather a gathering, Friday night for the new school year, wanna go with me?" He asked, changing the subject entirely.

"Oh, I dunno. I know how those parties are." you laughed while stuffing some of the club brochures into your bag. You'd have to pick something by next week, this was a tough choice.

"Ah c'mon. Its not one of those where people are just fucking on couches everywhere." He said so nonchalantly through a laugh.

Your face burned with his lewd comment and you hoisted your bag over your shoulder. "I should head home." You stated, taking your phone out to text your parents that you were on the way, not that they would really pay attention, or even respond.

Sensing your uneasiness, he stood up as well, taking hold of your wrist gently. "Sorry, I shouldn't have said it like that. It's just a simple get together for everyone to meet and get acquainted before we get too far into the semester. A good way to meet new people and make friends." He said with a suggesting tone, noticing you didn't have anyone else talk with you all day.

"I don't know if a freshman girl should show up to a party with a senior guy." You laughed, gently tugging your wrist against his grip. "Look, just think about it. I can pick you up at like 7, and I'll bring you back at an early time." He offered, and then took your phone from your other hand. You tried to protest but he smirked and held your phone up out of your reach, going into your contacts and adding his number in. You tried to climb up higher to get your device but he pressed call on your phone to make his phone ring, easily getting your contact info into his own phone.

"Did you just get my number?" You pouted, finally able to snag your phone back after standing on a taller bleacher row. He chuckled while letting you get it back. "It's your first year of high school. Don't be boring and stay at home. Come out, meet some people, have a good time. Where's the harm in that?"

The blush on your face refused to leave, and you pulled your lips in. "I think you're going to be a bad influence, Mr. Fushiguro." You stuck your tongue out while hopping down to the lower bleacher row.

"Maybe." He said while ruffling your hair again. You scowled and quickly whipped around, though losing your footing in the process. A little scream fell from your lips as gravity began to pull you, but it was cut off as Toji quickly caught you with a strong arm around your waist.

"Apparently, your little feet don't like to work either." He said quietly, holding you safely to keep you from falling.

Your hands had instinctively grasped onto his shirt and you gulped hard as he pulled you back up, the two of you standing ridiculously close together. Okay, this guy was incredibly hot, but he was several years older than you. Sure, a lot of senior guys dated freshmen girls, it was rather cliche. But jumping into that immediately upon starting high school wasn't in your plans at all.

"I, I have to go!" You nearly bleated out, letting go of him and turning to run down the bleachers, hoping you wouldn't trip and fall flat on your face.

"I'll see you tomorrow!" he yelled after you, raising a hand to wave as you continued your flustered run from him.

Friday, 6:55 PM

Sitting on your bed, you looked over the upcoming school schedule, planning your study time that was soon to start once you were assigned homework. When your phone dinged out with a message, you glanced to it curiously, hoping it was a continuing conversation from one your friends that you moved away from.

-"Hey, I'm here. Come on out."-

"What?" You said aloud, re-reading the message a few times to make sure you understood it. -"Nice try. You don't even know where I live."- You texted back through a laugh, shaking your head at his obvious joke.

Hearing a knock upon the front door down the hall, you completely froze. No way he was actually here, right? You slowly slid off your bed, going to your door and looking out as the knocking came again. Tiptoeing down the hall, you gulped as there was another knock right as you reached the door. You looked through the peephole, and nearly dropped your jaw when you saw Toji on the other side. The two of you got to see each other at school all week, as he sat with you at lunch and after school. It was nice, honestly. Having at least one person you were happy to see when you arrived each day. It made you feel less nervous walking into a school full of new people.

"Oh my god, are you a stalker?" You playfully gasped while opening the front door dramatically. An arrogant grin adorned his face as he shrugged in response. "Told you I'd be here. And you don't look ready at all, tsk tsk." You stuck your tongue out to him and turned to walk down your hall, leaving the door open so he could come in. "I honestly wasn't expecting you to show up at my house."

"Hey, I'm a man of my word." He chuckled and closed your front door before following you down the hall. "Your parents home?" "Nope. I mostly only see them in the mornings, if they're in town. Like I said, I'd be lucky if we even eat dinner together a couple times a month. Mom is in Kyoto and dad is in Osaka. They couldn't even bother to be here for my first week of starting high school."

You grumbled while rummaging through your closet, trying to find something cute to quickly change into while Toji casually looked around your room. "Damn, got enough stuffed animals on your bed?" He snorted and you pouted to him while pulling out a short, little dress. "Stuffed animals are great to have on the bed."

"I think I'd much rather have a girl on my bed than some stuffed animals."

You rolled your eyes while holding up the dress to yourself and looking in the mirror. "You boys all have a one set mind. Doesn't it get boring?" "Boring? Absolutely not. How can you say sex is boring?" He laughed while plopping down onto your bed, some of your stuffed animals falling over against him. You shrugged nonchalantly and turned away from him, hiding behind your closet door to change. "Well, I've never done it, so I guess I can't have an opinion on it."

Of course, you weren't aware of the interest you just sparked in this guy. He also wouldn't let you know that if he leaned back enough, he could see your reflection in the nearby mirror as you changed, despite you thinking you were out of sight. A smirk tugged at his lips as he watched your young and untouched body with perverse desire. The younger girls were more susceptible to his advances, not usually ones to put up a fight or resist because they were ignorant and shy. He cocked a brow at your lacy thong before letting out a slow breath of air to calm himself.

Patience. Must be patient.

"Oh, a gentleman." you cooed as Toji opened the passenger door for you to his car, well, his dad's car. You got in, tucking your short dress under your thighs while doing so.

"I'm full of surprises." He smirked, leaning in and buckling you into the seat before you had a chance to do it yourself. Your breath hitched at his closeness and feeling his palm brush over your thighs while he moved the seatbelt across your lap. He turned his head and smirked at you before stepping back and closing the car door. A little shaky breath left your lips as you sat alone for a moment. This was certainly new for you, and you weren't sure if the pounding in your heart was from happiness or anxiety. Or maybe a mix of both. Your parents never paid a lot of attention to what you did, but you really weren't a wild child. Maybe you never let yourself get into situations that could be a mix of excitement and adventure. This senior guy was clearly flirting with you, so what? People flirt all the time. Its fun and innocent. Especially being new to town and to school, you weren't going to deny the attention from someone. Not like you got any from home.

"So, are you some stalker or something? I never gave you my address." You teased, looking over to Toji as he drove. "Maybe I followed you home." He said with a fake scary voice and you scoffed while rolling your eyes playfully. "Well, you did say you followed short girls." "Short girls that are cute." he corrected. You blushed at his handsome grin and looked the other way out of the window, letting the thought of how he knew where you lived leave your mind. Oh, you poor girl. You clearly had no idea the kind of guy Toji Fushiguro was. Or rather, the kind of monster he'd turn out to be.

It was definitely one of those types of parties. A lot of the other students in attendance were seniors and juniors. There were a handful of sophomores, and you weren't sure if there were any other freshman besides yourself or not. There was the usual drink buffet in the kitchen as most parties had, and you were more than certain someone had spiked everything, so you drank with caution. This might not be your normal scene, but you weren't going to be a chicken shit and whimp out. A senior guy, a hot senior guy, invited you here. No one was being rude to you, and other than seeing several people making out in various corners, grinding on each other on couches, or rolling joints in little huddles, nothing dangerously bad was happening. You still stuck close to Toji, only cause you had no idea who anyone was. A couple other guys had commented on your sexy little dress, and you can't deny the little thrill of approval you got from it. However, Toji didn't approve of their little comments. He'd give a dirty look to any guy making a comment on your dress, telling them to piss off. You thought it was cute, and you admired the little protective side he was showing, especially when he put an arm around your shoulder each time another guy was too interested in the amount of skin you were showing off.

"Are you jealous?" you teased while getting another drink from the kitchen. "Heh, you'd like that, wouldn't you?" He snorted while getting a beer from the fridge. "Maybe? Cute, little freshman girl with a big, jealous senior guy? I have scary dog privilege." You laughed while pushing against his arm playfully. He drank his beer while smirking down to you. "I'll fight anyone that tries to touch what's mine." A shudder went through your body, and it wasn't of fear or worry. It was a new feeling of interest and curiosity. Maybe it was the spiked drink, or the result of growing hormones, you weren't sure. "Okay, I really need to use the bathroom." You quickly excused yourself before the blush on your face could get any more intense, shuffling past others to head in the direction you hoped was right.

You splashed some water on your face and let out a heavy breath, calming your nerves. Were you feeling, turned on? Sure you were still young, but you knew people who had started fooling around when they were your age and even younger. But, you've never done anything with anyone before. You always tried to be on your best behavior for the sake of your parents, but you were really bummed from the recent and sudden move. It was a new place, new people, a new school year. It should be harmless to have fun and play around. Teenagers messed around a lot. Wasn't uncommon. You didn't want to come off as immature or a prude when you finally got your moment. But, you definitely knew you didn't want that moment to happen any time soon.

When you came back from the bathroom, Toji was in some drinking contest with another guy, and you watched with amusement while sipping on your obviously spiked drink. It was fruity, and had a little kick to it, but it tasted good. You were feeling a little fuzzy though, and it didn't help with how you viewed Toji. When he slammed his empty drink down on the counter and licked his lower lip, you swallowed hard. You were definitely falling into some cliche scene right now, but whatever. It was cliche cause it happened often, and was pretty normal.

When he noticed you, he left the guys and headed your head, a big grin on his face. "Like what you see? You're staring at me like you're hungry." "Maybe I'm just hungry." you said while setting your now empty cup down. "Wanna ditch this and get some real food? Just the two of us then?"

Your heart skipped a little beat at the idea of sitting down at a restaurant with just the two of you. Felt like a little date. Is this how dates went? You asked if he was good to drive, which he waved you off and said obviously. Apparently he'd already been drinking for a few years, and some beers and a few shots at a party weren't anything to get him too intoxicated. Good for him, cause your head was pretty foggy still.

He took you to a decent little restaurant, and you smiled bashfully when he got out of the car and opened your door for you before you could even get unbuckled. "You just continue to be a gentleman." you laugh, shaking your thighs to make sure your short dress wasn't up too high as you stepped out of the car. "All for you, princess."

"Nah, you don't want that." Toji laughed as you started to name off what you'd like to eat. "No?" "It wouldn't be good." "Well what should I order then? Since you seem to know more than me." You stuck your tongue out at him and he chuckled while looking over the menu. "Here, this. It tastes way better anyway." He pointed to something and you shrugged. "Fine with me then." It didn't seem like a lot of food came with his choice, but it was delicious. Nothing wrong with great tasting food. You did enjoy Toji making an effort to keep talking with you though, and not just checking out his phone, even though you heard it chime several times while the two of you ate. The food also helped clear your mind a bit, getting the buzz out of your system. Though, you still admired him all the same.

"Shit..." Toji grumbled while putting his face into his hand. "What's wrong?" "I forgot my fucking wallet at home." He sighed heavily, rechecking his pockets. "Oh, no problem." You said while finishing the food in your mouth. "I can pay for it." "It doesn't particularly look good if I let the girl pay for dinner." He scoffed, looking aggravated about his wallet. You shrugged and pulled your wallet from your purse. "I can just give the money to you and then you can pay for it." "You sure?" "It's not that big of a deal. My parents give me plenty of money all the time. I think it's their way of pretending they're in my life." You laughed a little sadly while handing over a decent amount of cash. He looked at it in surprise but didn't hesitate to take it from you. "I appreciate it."

Toji put the car into park outside of your home and you let out a heavy breath while looking over to him. "Well, this was actually a pretty fun night." "Yeah?" He grinned over to you while putting an arm behind your headrest. "Glad you had a good time. Told you it wouldn't be that bad." You smiled and held the hem of your dress, experiencing those fuzzy feelings all over again. You could have sworn he was leaning in a little closer to you, and you'd be lying if you weren't leaning in more to him as well.

One of his large hands slipped up under your chin, pulling you into him as his lips connected with yours. Your eyes widened in shock, but you didn't move back from him, you weren't sure you could even if you wanted to. As his tongue slipped into your mouth, both of his hands suddenly gripped onto your arms, pulling you from your seat and into his onto his lap. "T-Toji!" you whimpered through his lips, finally pulling away and looking up to quickly breathe as his mouth moves down to your neck, sucking on your skin and making you tremble. It certainly sent feelings through your body you never experienced, but feeling what was growing between his legs caused you to panic and you put your hands against his chest. His hands started to slide your dress up from your thighs and you shook your head, trying to struggle in his grip. "Wait, please, not like this, Toji please." You begged through panting, closing your eyes tightly.

He pulls back from you, aggravated but nodding his head in understanding. "Sorry princess, little bit of that alcohol still getting to me." You're lightheaded while still in his lap, trying not to let your own recent alcohol fuzzed mind lead you into something you weren't ready for. A heavy blush comes across your face as he sighs and gently kisses your forehead, holding you close while opening the door. "Mind if I come in and get something to drink, let the rest of this buzz wear off?" You quickly nodded while licking your lips, still embarrassed from what just happened. You've literally never kissed a guy on the cheek before, let alone get a mouth full of tongue. Your breath was shaky as you changed in your room, and you looked at yourself in the mirror, not sure if you should be happy or ashamed.

"Would you like some hot tea?" Toji asks through your closed door and you smiled to yourself. He was really nice though. "Yes please!" you called back, putting on some comfy clothes to relax in. You sat in the living room, excitedly texting your friends that you just had your first kiss, and with a senior guy no less. They certainly cheered you on, saying it was about time. Toji glanced to you from the kitchen, seeing you were preoccupied on your phone. He chuckled to himself, pulling out a small packet from his pocket. Checking on you one final time, he made sure you weren't going to look up as he poured the contents of the packet into your tea. "Here, princess." Toji grinned with charm while handing you the cup of hot tea. You smiled fondly up to him, slowly blowing over the top of it and getting more comfy onto the couch. "Thank you, Toji." You said before taking a small sip. He nodded with an arrogant grin on his face, drinking his own cup of tea. "Of course, hope it tastes alright?" "Tastes perfect." You smiled, feeling giddy while still texting your friends and taking another big drink.

I hope you enjoyed! <3 I'm happy to actually be writing this story again. I truly LOVE comments so please leave some! They make me smile so much. ヾ(•ω•`)o

The next chapter will be the final part of the backstory before I more or less fast forward it several years. This wasn't included in my original story, because I didn't think it would be approved of or liked, but like I said, I'm writing this now the way I've wanted. <3

#sukuna jjk #sukuna #jujutsu kaisen #ryomen sukuna #ceo!au #toji x reader #jjk toji

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cloudluvrrr · 2 days ago

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Angels.

a/n: hi

It’s been a while 💔i got butt fucked by finals but we dont talk about that, happy new year guys ^.^, im super thankful that i got back into writing (even if it bad) and im glad ppl like my dumb headcannons! I'd like to try to write more this year and hopefully get to 100 followers ^o^

tw: for religous topics, intimacy (implied) sunday being conflicted, bad writing 😜

sunday x g/n reader

-Televangelism - Ethel Cain

Sunday sat in the pews of the church, staring ahead at the podium where earlier he had given the daily prayer over the disciples in the church. He held his bible tightly, as he waited for Father Gopher to finish conversing with one of the ladies. His eyes wondering around the familiar church, the statues of Mother Mary and his savior Jesus Christ. The sight of the statues made his mouth dry, the overwhelming dread that he might mess up and sin and how the Father might find out.

Eventually Father Gopher did exit his office, taking Sunday to his ranch. Sunday hated the orphanage, which why he spend most of the day at the church. Helping set up for the day, help out during bible studies. Anything to get his mind off of where he was left by his parents. So he often wrote Robin letters, describing what he was doing. Learning piano, memorizing bible strictures. He’d try to send them weekly, including small newspaper clippings of his performances at the church and trinkets he’d find that reminded him of her.

Father Gopher was helping him become a pastor, not because he wanted to.. Or did he? He thought to himself as he wrote to Robin. He tried to write weekly to update her on his situation. He missed her, but he hated the orphanage they stayed at. His goal was to earn enough money for them to live together one day. When he was either a pastor or a pianist for them church choir. He forced himself into any activity, with no thought behind it.

His days were mostly mundane, practicing his piano and reading the Bible. Father had told him that when he was old enough, he'd take over the small church. Which soon became Sundays goal, now he followed behind father gopher consuming whatever knowledge he'd spoken.

Till one day there was a new family at church, Father had asked him to show you around. Where youth group was, where everyone would eat after the sermon.

He nervously explained the church and everyone who ran it. Stuttering over his words when he felt eyes staring at the back of his head.

“..what’s so interesting about my head?” He asked in an annoyed tone.

“Your wings, they’re pretty” you smiled at him, “I’ve always thought Halovians were pretty” you say shyly admiring his pale feathers.

His cheeks turned rosey as he looked everywhere, to avoid the embarrassment. “..thanks” he said quietly. He had a small blush on his face. The entire tour and when you left he went home to look at his wings closely, “are they really that pretty?” he asked himself looking at the pale blue feathers.

—

Sunday would see you every.. Sunday at church, little by little getting to know each other more and more.

He’d go out of his way to find you after the service, offering help for any thing. Any little excuse to be around you. Often catching him in town, helping those around the church or him sending a letter every week. He wanted to get closer to you, but one thing held him off. Your stance on religion. He could tell your heart wasn't fully devoted to the church, you were in a way like him. But instead of feeling the dread in your stomach, you were fine.

The father wanted him to have a god loving lover, not someone like you who only attended because they were told too. Yet he couldn’t keep himself away from you, Finding interest in anything you did out of the church.

You learned he loved sweets, but the Father would limit him, he loves music especially piano, it was a marvel watching him play so well. You also learned he was to take over the church once he was of age.

"Is it something you want?" you ask titling your head, at the idea as you swung beside him on the playground.

"Father wan-" before he could finish you interrupt. "No is it something you want Sunday"

For the first time in his life, he really questioned himself.

He never grew out of it, even as a teen. Father Gopher knew of you and Sunday, he didn’t like leaving either of you alone. He didn’t like the idea of letting Sunday fool around with someone he had feelings for. Even less someone who wasn't as close to god as he'd like them to be

So he'd sneak out at night just too see you, you two often met in some field or in front of the gas station.

He’d take you on walks, showing you his favorite places to visit. A small shack behind the barn, a secret diner far from town, a place where he’d gaze into the sky.

“The stars, they remind me of your eyes.” You said looking back him. “Do they?” He asked his gaze never leaving the sky, “they sparkle the same way, yours so when you see me”. At that comment he finally looked over, “it’s because you’re beautiful” he said simply getting up, and leaving.

There wasn’t really a line that defined what you two were, many thought you were lovers. But Sunday never really said ‘I love you’, he’d kiss you and give you estranged touches. But it was nothing like the other couples in the town. Was he ashamed of loving you? You never bothered to ask, it didn’t hurt.. much. Since you only saw him at night.

Night spent in abandoned cars, where you'd both talk about everything. He liked listening to other people lives, they were all so different to the one he was given.

Listening to the antics you were up too in school, things you did at home. It was all foreign to him. God how he ached to experience them with you.

"Have you ever been in love?" you asked leaning on his shoulder, your eyes following his. "With god-"

"thats not what I meant, like love with anyone? Romantically" you pushed sitting up to face him directly.

"...I don't know, what it feels like. Only what I've read from the books you let me read. It sounds wonderful" he said thoughtfully, with a small sigh. He didn't want to comment on the feeling he felt when he was around you.

Sunday was feeling especially restless, during church he kept stealing glances at you while playing his piano. Looking at the notes, and the lyrics made him ill. He couldn't face them, not with the thoughts he had or actions he took with you.

He'd rented out a room for the night in a shabby motel, it was cheap and inconspicuous. "Isn't your father-" "He's not my father!" he cut you off.. "..No I told him I'm visitin' robin" he added closing the curtains. "..When is she gonna finally come to town?"

"No idea." He said towering over you, his hand softly caressing your plump cheek. "You really wanna do this? Your not gonna regret waiting are you-" "No.. all teens do this no?" "In movies and shit.." you replied quietly as his lips press against yours.

"Sunday, he's watching" you say softly looking at his bag, that held all of his church belongings.

"..I'll repent later"

After that fateful encounter, he avoided you. He'd immediately go back to the flat where he lived, where he'd spend nights in bed repeating the words of his bible in his head. Tears staining the words, he didn't know what was right. His heart or the thing he'd devoted his life too. The church choir didn't resonate with his heart anymore, his heart felt heavy at the lyrics. Especially spotting you alone in the back, only made him feel worst.

The guilt gnawed at him so much, he just left the town.

He left the town, he didn't know what he wanted. To love you or to love the church. He couldn't tell you goodbye in person, so he wrote a letter. Leaving it in your mailbox, with a gift tied up neatly with a bow.

Dear, Angel

I really did love you, I never told you. I was scared, to think of what would've come from it. But I adored you, you helped me realized what I wanted. I owe you everything for that, I'm sorry for not facing you.

Just know that I regret nothing, I've moved somewhere quite aways from town. Perhaps I'll see you once more?

I don't know if you hate me or love me, perhaps I'll never know.

I wrote sheet music for you, its not church related. But its how my heart felt when I was around you.

I remember when you asked me if I ever had fallen in love, I lied. I was, I am in love with you.

-Your Sunday

You stared at the word angel, in his eye you were his angel. You read over the note with a blank face, his neat handwriting covering the page. The tears came when you saw the sheet music he'd written, it was all handmade. The carefully lined up staff alone the start, the notes perfectly lined up. What few new words it had, chosen to describe his love for you.

The piece being called angel.

This one took me a fat minute haven’t had any inspiration plus I’m back in school 😔 amphorus is out :3 I’ll add more characters to my roster too! For this I took a lot of inspo from preachers daughter and Ethel’s new album perverts which I personally rlly enjoyed ^^ lmk if you have any requests or want to see me write for more characters! ^3^ I think this year im gonna focus more on requests, and maybe more one shots.

#💫.cloud.luver #honkai x reader #honkai star rail #honkai imagines #sundayajskeoirfjfjfjrjrjoufhhh #sunday x y/n #sunday x you #sunday hsr #hsr sunday #sunday headcanons #sunday #sunday x reader #honkai angst #honkai x you #hsr x reader #hsr headcanons #penacony #honkai posting

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diminuel · 14 hours ago

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Stressful days suck, hope you're getting your energy back soon, take care of yourself! <3

Have few thoughts about timetravel!Xebec since I absolutely adore your version of him, those boots def can walk all over me OwO

the timetravel def wasn't planned, he had found the spell by chance and it never specified what would happen so he kept it as a backup just in case

during the God Valley incident he got cornered and used it when it became clear he wouldn't otherwise get out of the situation

He thought that his crew would keep watch over his child until he could get back to them since Crocodile was raised with them (looking at you Newgate and Linlin)

(You know what they say about assumptions)

Instead of landing near his little Pebble, he turns up in front of ASL and subsequently has to learn to live with the facts that a) he's def not in his original time anymore and b) that somehow the spawn of Monkey D. Garp managed to romance his Pebble

Xebec: This might as well just happen to me...I would love some spaghetti

ASL not taking him seriously (S: Should we tell baba or dad? A: nah, he's kinda pathic)

Would be kind of funny if Xebec is just laying head down on the table while Luffy pokes him (Ace and Sabo are judging Xebec...hard) when whoever is supposed to be watching them appears

People finding out in a ranking order of how hilarious I imagine it:

Makino (in the case that ASL are having their lunch in Party Bar) -> "Oh, who is your new friend? Rocks, I have never heard of that name but I can ask around Foosha? Oh, you mean Wani, they're currently on a work trip so I'm looking after the boys, do you want me to take a message? ...What do you boys mean he just appeared??" While Xebec is trying to impress on her the fact that a) he's a scourge of the seas, b) yes please, he does need to talk with his Pebble ASAP and c) no, he does not mean any harm and he's not some crazy stalker!! Ending with him nearly being run out of Foosha or Garp being called on him because he's visiting

Garp -> but in this case ASL already finished their lunch and went back to their tree house (still with the premise that Dragodile is gone for some reason and that they're currently babysat on Dawn), they decided to let that fancy guy follow them because Luffy likes him and they trust his intuition so, so it's just a row of ducklings with Ace and Sabo at the front bickering about Xebec while Luffy follows happily and Xebec is just trudging along, shell-shocked because his Pebble has children!! and being tired af after God Valley, they decide to park Xebec with Dadan because that's where they got left when their gramps didn't know where to stick them (Dadan: I am not running a charity or hotel!! ...fine, I guess he can stay), imagine Garp turning up a few days later and finding not only his grandkids but also that guy he and Roger tried their hardest to kill and who then seemingly disappeared from thin air, Garp and Xebec just staring slently for a moment with completely blank faces before Garp turns around and walks back into the forest, ASL are delighted and want to learn how to do that to gramps before a sudden ruckus starts and Garp comes charging back and just starts trying his best to kill Xebec, cue both of them just screaming at each other over perceived slights while everyone else is just absolute lost (X: My Pebble and your family?? G: And they also became a government sanctioned warlord!! X: NooOOO!!)

Dragodile -> "What do you mean a strange man just appeared and you fed him because he looked kinda pathetic?? Dragon, this is your fault, you and your bleeding heart, we should just remove hi- DAD??"

Thank you for this delightful ask! I do enjoy pondering this AU and you have great and amusing ideas! X'D I don't know which scenario I find most hilarious! Maybe Garp, because poor Dadan has to deal with another guy. But he's so wet and pathetic that she can't say no. She'll just make Crocodile pay for this freeloader since his kids dragged in this guy. And then poor Dadan almost gets her house destroyed when Garp and Xebec clash. (I assume Xebec is stronger than Garp if it took both Garp and Roger working together to defeat him. But maybe he's just strangely depowered from God Valley and the impromptu time traveling so he can't fight at full strength.)

I have some thoughts too but they might be darker than the comedy route we seem to be taking for this AU *lol*

I was imagining that Rocks vaguely knows what the spell does. That it connects blood to blood. Stealing from Supernatural some more, it's possible that he knew that it was going to activate the moment he dies - the energy unleashed in death can be harnessed and directed so that instead of the soul of the person going wherever it goes in the OP world it stays on earth, but Xebec doesn't know what exactly is going to happen. Will he just become a spirit? Fine by him, he's gonna haunt Roger.

It's possible that it was announced that the God Knights managed to kill Rocks' kid, WB believing it because he saw the familiar clothing (that Croc might have exchanged with one of the many civilian casualties because he heard that he was hunted. He's a tough, resourceful 8 year old.) but Rocks knows it can't be true. So he goes to fight, not caring if he dies. Because if he dies and his Pebble is still alive, blood will connect to blood with the spell. If he dies and his Pebble is also dead then it doesn't matter anyway.

And if the spell doesn't do anything or does something else, surely WB or Linlin will take care of his Pebble (who has to be alive.)

So for all Garp knows Rocks is dead. He killed him. And then a blast of energy hit them and they thought this was just some sort of self-destruction by Rocks so that the Government couldn't get his body. But nope. He's here eating Spaghetti with his grandkids. Still as young as he was that day. X'D

And I guess Crocodile would recognize his dad in this case. Because I've also played around with an idea that he, for some reason, doesn't recognize him, doesn't remember anything about his childhood before waking up on a random island, all alone.

But we can do funny/ silly for this AU, I don't mind! Plenty of other AUs I could load full of angst >:3

(Do I need a Rocks D. Crocodile tag or something...?)

#Anon #Diminuel replies #I don't know how to tag this

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redladydeath · 2 days ago

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thinking about trans masc vox and what his relationship with his kids would be like.

vox didn't want kids. he didn't want to get married and he certainly didn't want to give up his career to be a housewife either. but he didn't feel like he had a choice. that was the route that everyone expected him to take, and the way others perceived him was everything to vox. it was fine. he could handle it. he'd found a rich, handsome husband who looked at him like he'd hung the moon; they had plans to move to the other side of the country, far away from vox's parents; even if he no longer had to work, he could surely find something other than childrearing to keep him occupied. everything could be perfect as long as he let it be.

of course, vox couldn't force himself to be happy. he hated being pregnant (as well as what it did to his body) and he never felt as connected to his babies as he thought he should. he loved them, of course, but caring for them day in and day out was so monotonous, and he never felt like he was living up to the idealized image of motherhood he wished to achieve. it got a bit better as the kids got older and became more independent, but vox was still distant. he wasn't very affectionate with the kids unless they were out in public, although he had his moments. still never felt like he was doing it "right," though.

everything just felt so hollow. vox's relationship with his husband soured. vox sneered at his husband's increasing dependency on alcohol and prescription medication (the war was not a happy time for mr. kingston); vox's husband called him a terrible wife and an even worse mother. vox left most of the childcare and cleaning to the family's live-in nanny. he spent his days either socializing with the "other" women of the neighborhood (which only ever made him feel more inadequate and out of place) or sat in front of the tv, watching the lives that he could've or should've had play out on the opposite side of the glass. it was an accident when, after a night of drinking, he tripped and cracked his head on the side of the television, but he couldn't say he was particularly disappointed that it was all finally over.

poor little tommy was the one who found his mother dead in the living room one morning. vox had a complicated relationship with tommy; he saw so much of himself in him and hoped that he would grow up to be the man vox wished he could be, but because of that hope he was cold and exacting with him, his expectations always sky high. tommy had craved his mother's love when he was small, but as he grew, he began to feel like there was nothing he could ever do that would please "her." being the one to find vox's corpse just made everything even more complicated. sarah went to pieces, as you would expect. she had a somewhat closer relationship with her mother than her brother had, even if vox was still rather distant. sarah looked at him as though he actually were the perfect mother he wished he was, no matter how many times he fell short, and that endeared her to him. unconditional love wasn't something vox had any experience with before sarah. she could also see the melancholy that always seemed to hang over her mother even when “she” tried to pretend otherwise, and tried to help alleviate it as best she could. sarah was never able to feel safe in that house again after vox’s accident.

things get even more complicated if the kids reunite with vox in hell. in the scenario where they die as adults, they might take a bit longer than usual to recognize vox since... well, they were looking for their mother and instead they found a man. maybe vox finds them instead; maybe he simply hasn't upgraded his voice by the time the kids arrive in hell. thomas and sarah don't understand why vox is "pretending" to be a man, but he explains it away by claiming he does it in order to get a leg up in the business/overlord world (even though the kids can see there are plenty female overlords in hell). as the years go on, vox modifies more aspects of himself. the kids notice that he's not just living as a man in public, he's doing it in private too. they begin to realize that this is something more than just a tactical business decision, although they don't have the vocabulary to say what it is yet. tom may blame valentino at one point— maybe he's the one who got his mother into crossdressing— but as time passes, the two of them start to get it. they already call vox "dad" when in the company of others, so it's not too much of an adjustment to start doing it in private too. regardless of how unusual it might seem to their 1950s-1970s minds, neither of them can deny that vox is so, so much more happy than they ever remember him being when he was alive. now, if only he’d become a good person too, then they'd have the full package...

in the verse where the tom and sarah die as children, it's a similar situation, although vox may not have begun living as a man yet at the time of their reunion. the kids watch as their mother gradually changes from the unhappy housewife they knew "her" as on earth, to a desperate new sinner trying to scrape together enough so the two of them could eat, to a business owner head over heels with "her" mentor, to a newly christened overlord looking to build an empire, to a well-established overlord who projects strength and perfection in all he does, to their father, the same selfish and ambitious man he's always been, but now finally comfortable in his own skin. it feels odd to watch vox change so much while the two of them remain the same, but one benefit of being stuck as children for all eternity is that they'll always remain adaptable. vox's transition is complex yet simple in the same way that everything feels complex yet simple to their forever-young minds. the two of them now have an earth dad, a hell dad, a not-step-dad, and an almost not-step-dad; that's simply the way things are now.

#redlady speaks #oc posting #hazbin posting #hazbin hotel #vox #trans vox #tagging this with more than just 'oc posting' because the first half is solely about vox #the kids only show up halfway through

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elytrafemme · 1 year ago

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okay actually fucking level w/ me here. i meet this guy at a college day and we hang out the entire time including me eating dinner w. him and his MOM. and then we don't get contact info and i cry in the car and hotel bed Whatever. we end up at the same school and he accidentally gives me the wrong number and starts acting weird around me so i realize and get the right number from a mutual friend then text him then he never replies to my second round of texts post confirming but comes up to me later while i'm with a bunch of people and he's with a bun ch of people and interrupts a convo to say i'm SO sorry i didn't reply and invites me to this game night w 0 detail of when it'll be and i'm like it's fine lol who cares and then he never gives me info and never texts me back and starts ignoring me again and acting weird around me and then i talk to my roomate who fucking adores him like he hung the stars so i'm like okay for her i'll give him a shot so i text him again and he never replies but he does apparently seem sad the same day i text him but i haven't really run into him since . LITERALLY WHAT DOES HE WANT FROM MEEEEEE

#this would be fine if it wasn't that EVERYONE LOVES HIM #LIKE EVERYON E IS OBSESSED W HIM BC HE'S SO NICE #OK. IF YOU'RE SO NICE. WHY THE FUCK DO YOU HATE ME!#what did i DO you freak like!!!! but i can't be mad bc everyones like Maybe be more considerate #because he might just be scared. OK CAN HE STOP THOUGH #DOES ANYONE UNDERSTAND MEAIUKSFJDH

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ancha-aus · 6 months ago

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RealAgeAU Drabble - First Birthday

I am back at it again! :D The no chill train continues and I want to enjoy the thing that I like so here we go! @spotaus get in here friend :D

First Drabble/Prompt Prev Drabble Next Drabble

We are here to win and winning is having fun! :D

*--------------------*

Cross nods his thanks to Ellie as he takes the box with a very nice looking cake over "You two really didn't need to."

Dani snorts "Are you crazy? Of course we do! Also don't forget his presents." and she rises three boxes.

Cross takes them with care and puts them under in the bag before putting the cake carefully on top.

Cross still feels bad "You really didn't need to. I am sorry we didn't invite you two and stuff but we are just worried it gets too much for him and-"

Eliie giggles and waves it off "We get it! First birthdays are a big deal especially with you guys getting him back not even a year ago!"

Cross nods before frowning and shooting the two a look "What... do you mean?"

Ellie looks shocked before smiling guilty and looking away. Dani smiles "We don't know know... mostly because you guys don't relaly tell anyone details and we aren't going to search for answers that could mean trouble... but well... how you guys act and how Nightmare acts tell a lot about the story you guys are not sharing... you know?"

Cross looks away and tries to push down the annoyance. This is good. Their backstory is being believed and people are coming to the conclusions they want. Yet Cross is still was immediantly afraid they figured out more for some reason even if that isn't possible...

Cross is getting lost in his own skull again.

Ellie looks sad as she rubs her hands together "Sorry... we didn't mean to make you feel bad or unsure or anything... We just wanted to reassure you that we get it and understand why you guys are private about stuff! And that we aren't hurt about not getting invited!"

Cross gives aslow nod and mutters "It is fine just... worried... about what people know and talk about and stuff... in case the wrong people hear the right things you know?" that is the best way he can explain.

Dani nods and looks determined "We know. and know that if you ever need a place to hide, either you guys or just a place to hide Nightmare, you can always come to us. We have a large place and can easily find somewhere to tug you guys away untill stuff blows over."

Ellie nods and grins widely "You can count on us!" then she nudges him, whihc really does nothing to make him move but it doesn't seem to bother ellie "Now do to your boyfriends and kid and have fun with your party!"

Cross sputters as he knows he is blushing "We aren't! No wait we are but it is new and-" both girls giggle and cross glares at them "Stop it!"

Dani grins "Sorry sorry. and relax cross. You guys will be fine."

Ellie nods and gives him the thumbs up "Exactly! Relax and enjoy your time together!"

Cross mutters and mumbles his goodbye and quickly makes his escape. He rushes back to their car and gets in before lying his skull on the wheel. trying to will the blush away.

After his moment he puts the car into reverse and gets back to the road. It is easy enough to ride to town and pick up the last few groceries.

Cross takes a moment to mentally check his list before checking it on his phone as well. Then he starts their truck again and goes home.

They only one they hadn't told that today was Ngihtmare's birthday and party was Error. But that is on Error. If that guy wants to learn stuff he can ask them instead of creeping on them like the antisocial outcode he is.

He returns home to see Killer and Horror moving around the living room as Cross carries the last few things in. He checks around before speaking "Dust and Nightmare?"

Killer grins "Garden! They are checking the grapes as we speak. Nightmare knows we are setting up so he doesn't have to be nervous or stressed."

Cross nods and relaxes "That is good." he places the cake the Danielle's made on their table and smiles. It is little skull decorations in bright pink and cherries all along the top.

Killer whistles as he leans on his shoudlers "cake looks good." then Killer grins widely at him "Not as good as you though" and he winks.

Cross blushes and rubs his cheek. fighting the need to hide at the compliment and obvious flirt. Ever since they admitted their feelings for each other and they started dating Killer had cranked up his flirting and compliments to eleven. Cross didn't even think Killer could flirt more yet he was proven wrong.

Horror leaves the kitchen and snorts at Killer "Back to decorating." then he places more snacks on the table.

Cross smiles and waits "What can I help with?"

Horror thinks for a while as he looks around "Can you get the presents?"

Cross nods as he leaves the food wiht nightmare and rushes up to their attic. quickly finding the presents and he carries them down carefully.

By the time he returns Killer had finished with the decorations and putting books and things away. Horror has food in the oven and put six candles on the birthday cake.

Right with Ngihtmare not ageing they just decided to keep calling him six until he recovered enough to truly start growing. Just to make sure that Nightmare didn't feel worse about the fact he hadn't grown yet. Their baby had had enough stress abotu not being good enough or being wrong. They will not add more to it!

That is another thing that changed since the kidnaping. Cross just gets to call Ngihtmare their baby now! Obviously before they also did it but it also felt dishonest in some way. Not anymore luckily as Nightmare also called them dads!

Cross snorts to himself. if his past self could only see him now. Cross remembers how unsure he was about even taking care of NIghtmare. Look at him now!

Killer rushes off to change as Horror quickly cleans himself up for the party. Cross looks around the living room and smiles. All ready! Cross goes to the door and shouts for Dust that everything is ready.

They wait with excitement as Dust brings Nightmare inside. nightmare glances around at all the decorations and the small pile of presents and the snack table. sockets wide and eye lights so so bright.

Killer grins as he opens his arms wide "Happy Birthday!"

Cross quickly joins in "Happy birthday nighty."

horror nuzzles their babybones and mutters "Happy birthday."

Nightmare looks between them all and looks down with a tiny blush. Shyly he mutters "didn't need to be big and stuff."

Killer grins and waves it off "pppfffft of course we make it a party! How could we not for our little baby~" Killer taps his teeth against the tiny skull in a kiss before skipping over to the cake "come! lets start with the cake before it becomes a fire hazard! Dani and Ellie made it for you and they both wished you a great day as well!"

Cross watches as Dsut brings nightmare over to the cake and nuzzles his skull. Cross listens clsoely as Dust mutters "make a wish Nightmare." and he helps him stay stable to enable him to blow out the candles.

Nightmare glances around befor elooking at the cake. He leans closer, trusting Dust to keep him steady, and blows out the six candles.

they go out together and Killer cheers loudly which Cross joins. Dust just nuzzles Nightmare as horror gives a few claps. It is great and amazing and-

he is crying.

Cross feels terrible and is by Dust and Ngihtmare right away as he gently cleans the small face "It is oaky nighty. deep rbeaths. what is wrong?" did they go too far? trauma response?Bad flashback? Cross tries to think of more reasons but Nightmare sniffles again and shakes his tiny skull.

Dust frowns but it is Killer who knows what to say as he leans close "Hey it is okay. what is wrong? Too much noise? Too many scents? Too bright or something?" They are doing this in the middle of the day but maybe the combination of the bright fire of the candles and the natural sunlight was too much for his sensitive sockets.

Another shakes of the skull.

Cross and Killer share a look as they both clearly try to think of more posible problems.

Dust however watches Nightmare and pulls him closer "big feelings?"

a moment of silence before a tiny nod.

Dust nods himself as if that makes sense and he mutters again "Sad feelings?"

Nightmare clearly thinks for a moment before shaking his skull.

Dust hums and nuzzles him "very big happy feelins then?"

another nod.

Cross isn't sure how any of that makes sense and looks helplessly at Dust for an explanation.

Dust see sthe obvious confusion as he speaks "It is... hard to explain..." he looks at Ngihtmare and Ngihtmare clearly has the same issue.

horror however steps closer and gentle rubs the tiny skull. Horror is always so careful with Nightmare and even when is is so big and strong clearly always knows how to move to never harm Ngihtmare. Cross respects him so much for that.

Horror speaks softly "It is new. and the happy feelings you are feeling are very strong aren't they?"

Ngihtamre glances at him and nods.

Horror smiles as he continues rubbing the tiny skull "and before... before it was easy. You had powers to help you filter emotions and feel it all. Now it is you and all yours."

Ngihtmare relaxes a bit and sniffles before speaking "no... no one really..." he rubs his socket with a sniff "No one was ever... happy i was there... Well dream was but dream was happy anyway... i doubt it would have mattered if i was there... but now.. instead of it being for him... it is for me and i never... no one ever..." another sniff as he looks helpless at them.

horror smiles and rubs his skull "You are happy and relieved but it is a lot and you aren't used to it. it is okay. a birthday can be overwhelming."

Ngihtmare nods again adn relaxes. Cross smiles at him and rubs the tiny cheek "Hey it is okay. the first time these guys threw a party for me I also dind't know what to do or say or how to act. Just relax okay? This is to show we are happy you are with us." and that he exists and is with them and that they love their tiny grumpy child.

Ngihtmare relaxes more into the hold and nods.

Killer grins and cheers "There we go! Ready to try the cake Dani and Ellie made?"

Nightmare gives another nod adn they give him a tiny piece. just to make sure his magic handles it alright but from the looks of it they had nothing to worry about. Cross tastes it and gets why immediantly. the cake is light and fluffy and while sweet it isn't overpowering so. Clearly the ladies tried their best to make something that wouldn't be too heavy or powerful for the babybones.

After the cake they sit in the nest and let Ngihtmare open his presents. The first on he opens is the sets of Dani and Ellie and it are lego sets.

The next present is from Crop and Straw and after opening it they find some art supplies. the present also holds a note that says that while they know Ink is a sensitive spot they both believe that this should not stop Nightmare from the ability to get to draw and play with these type of things.

Cross needed a moment to think about it but he found himself agreeing. Yes Ink is a very sensitive matter but they are right. There are so many things that you can do with art and drawing and just ahving fun and to not have nightmare explore these things as a child just because one asshole they knew was an artist seemed stupid. No pressure of course but the options is there now.

Then it is time for their presents and Cross is a bit more nervous. Nightmare looks curiously at the presents and Dust mutters that these are from all of them combined. Ngihtmare opens the first one and it is a new book set of a very popular book series for thise universe. Nightmare looks excited at the nice cover and Cross relaxes. it took them ages to hunt down the limited edition art cover boxset but it was clearly worth it.

Next present is opened and it is an empty journal and a pack full of colourful pens, with bats on them obviously. Dust nuzzles Nightmare and explains that it would maybe be nice for Nightmare to be able to keep a journal. Just to help himself wiht his thoughts and feelings and what he learns. To be able to write down the thoughts or memories haunting him. To get i tout of his system and mind.

Killer reassures him that while they are all nosy they all already agreed they would not read his journal. that is his for his private thoughts and secrets. That they will obviously listen to whatever worries him but Nightmare gets to decide what to share.

Cross had found Dust's idea perfect. With how close they all where it gave Nightmare very little privacy. This was a way to give Nightmare some privacy and to give him his own personal space to do with whatever he wanted. To reteach him that it is okay to have private thoughts and things that were only for him.

The nest present is another book. a large history book of the country they live in now. As expected Nightmare immediantly opens it and scans a few of the pages before smiling brightly. Clearly it was a hit!

Their last present is a movie. a documentary on bats and Nightmare looks shocked at it. Killer grins and winks "I figured that after the presents we can get comfy and watch this movie together?" Nightmare nods and looks excited at the movie.

And as they said it they got comfortable in their nest and put on the movie. Nightmare hugs his bat plushie close as he watches the movie.

They watch for quite a while until Horror tells them it is time to have a breka and eat a bit before they continue. They stretch out and roll their shoulders. only to turn around and find another present and a card on top.

Ngihtmare blinks and takes the card before grinning widely. Cross looks over his shoulder and rolls his eyes. Error writes how he is annoyed they didn't leave him a message about the party but that he wishes Nightmare a happy and healthy first birthday and that the present is for him.

Nightmare opens the present and grins at the giant knitted blanket with a cave motive and bats in there. He nuzzles the blanket and purrs up a storm.

Cross grins and wraps their baby up in the blanket before carrying him towards the table to eat a brithday dinner.

*--------------------*

First Drabble/Prompt Prev Drabble Next Drabble

#utmv #realageau #nightmare sans #deaged nightmare #killer sans #cross sans #dust sans #horror sans #It is the baby's first brithday party and everyone is here!#That is a lie. it is just the new family but that is okay because they are cute and are enjoying their first brithday together!#Everyone is excited but understanding about the baby having his first birthday with his his parents. clearly they need a calm party to star #Error is salty he wasn't invited but also not as salty as he could be because no one was there except for nightmare and his four dads.#So Error can accept he didn't get a VIP invite to his bestie's birthday as it was clearly a family only event.#Maybe he will actually learn to just knock on the door and be invited in over watching them through his tv screen.#Who am i kidding error did not learn anything.#But yes! The baby had his first party and got a bit overwhelmed because this was for him! all of it! For only him!#Because people love him and care for him and want him happy and nightmare was so used to that never being the case.#Also nightmare is convinced that Dream would have been fine without him. been happy wihtout him.#Night's poor self esteme mixing up with bad memories caused this believe.#after all. Everyone loved dream and dream was happy with the villagers. clearly he didn't need him. Nm just held him back.#Not the truth but it is what nightmare believes.#but yeah that was going through nightmare's little skull at the time <3 #That is it for now! Have a good one and remember! Have fun and be nice!

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codenamesazanka · 8 months ago

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Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy the false sense of peace All Might and Heroes created

.⬇️.

Shigaraki/Tenko wanting to destroy everything that lead to the existence of that house, which he conceptualizes as the embodiment of rejection and injustice in the world. Be a Hero for the Villains.

.⬇️.

AFO basically literally created that house

.⬇️.

Shigaraki/Tenko helps defeat AFO

.⬇️.

Deku telling him 'you already destroyed it' is... apparently Shigaraki/Tenko having finally gotten rid of the true cause of (his) rejection and injustice? main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society... solved? (main antagonist's big problem that represents an overarching major issue of the story/in-universe society not actually being the problem he thought it was but now also solved?)

.⬇️.

No longer a need for there to be a Hero for the Villains, Shigaraki/Tenko dies.

.⬇️.

Heroes not to be blamed in the first place. also fuck everyone else and all other 'actual' outcasts I guess.

#i understand that Tenko not having 'supposed' to be rejected doesn't mean the rejection didn't occur for the other League members #but taking that away from Tenko/Shigaraki - leader of the League of Villains - wanting to be their champion #symbolically being their collective grievances and wills condensed into one #taking that away makes the story a lot weaker #GOD what happened #nalslastworkingbraincell #honestly making everything AFO's fault #and making Tenko's main issue being his despair toward himself (created by AFO)#allowed for the (seemingly for now) clean resolution of 'get rid of the both of them' possible #It's AFO's fault? Kill him! Problem solved #Tenko's issue not actually *harm caused by other (non-AFO) people* but instead *harm caused by his self-conceptualization/his own self*?#Tenko's projecting his own self-loathing and anger onto the world and causing trouble for everyone and making his crusade meaningless?#let him die too. Pity but problem solved!#AFO gave him the specific quirk that was Decay because it was such a brutal and deadly quirk that would guarantee rejection #you cannot tell me he could've been fine after manifesting Decay if only AFO wasn't there to tell him he has an innate need to destroy #not after what we've seen of Shinsou and Toga #other 'normal' people would not have let him live a normal life #that *is* also very much a problem that should be addressed #but it was AFO who gave him Decay and Decay was also actually not naturally existing #so everything's fine! no changes for anyone!#all this could've been saved if this was transferred to AFO - AFO also seen as a victim of societal apathy #especially since he was BORN A TRASH RIVER RAT ORPHAN #but he's just a lonely guy who was too unpleasant to form real relationships #so. only real issue Hero Society ever had that needed to be addressed was civilians being too hard on Heroes #gotta love them more and demand less of them #yippee

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xtinyslip · 2 days ago

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"… BUT YOU KNOW ALMOST ALL OF IT." cecilia figured that the more information that she had now, the more she had to use to their advantage. it was all about the research, she liked to be prepared. if she was anything but fully prepared, it was more difficult to gain control of the situation. cecilia needed control, especially when it was her and parker's life that was hanging in the balance. "i know i can hold you to that and that you'll do it. lets promise now that no matter how much we're bound to argue over this guess list? that we always go to sleep together? it's most definitely our turn to be THAT couple. yes?" she couldn't help but chuckle sadly. "we can get another dog but they have to be cat friendly. i have two winston's to think about now. you remember those stupid matching t-shirts?" she was fighting the urge to move forward and kiss him, kiss the air out of him because -- because she loved him. she really did. "i think i can easily agree to no more of this." nodding her head. "… paul has been on high alert for bugs. he checks daily. it's -- it's fine." was it? shit. "the dogs didn't alert me which means he's been in that house more than once." she literally shuddered at the thought that this fucking psycho was watching her? watching her sleep? watching her what? ugh. no, she didn't need to be invited twice, moving in she was gentle as she buried her face into his chest. "you're allowed to need that moment." but now she was holding onto him because, this was her person, her guy, and nothing was going to change that. it was quite clear nothing could. "… it wasn't will. was it?" was that a betrayal she could handle? it was quite clear from the expression she was desperately trying to hide that it was not. "we've done bad things. she's done terrible things. she's your family, yes and i know i'm in no place to judge with what my own father has done to us but parker… i can acknowledge those things. she convinced you, and everyone else that i needed psychiatric care. she abused that system, she cut me open and quite literally left me to rot. will did what he had too. we're in no position to scold people over what is right or wrong." could she ever forgive elaine? no. did she want to have this same fight that never led them anywhere? no, she didn't. "… i will talk with him but not now. he's grieving, no good would come of it." that was her compromise. she felt it was fair, they were for once meeting in the middle. "don't flatter yourself, p. finn hates everyone that's not will." she did smile slightly at that, knowing that it applied to her too. "… will, that can be worked on… by me, of course." she knew it. "and my opinion is that i love you. i chose you. always will." cecilia was already moving forward to meet him half way. "so you know that you have me, wherever i am." @fcdcdmcmories

"NOT WITH THESE PEOPLE. YOU DON'T KNOW.. THE HALF OF IT." because he hadn't told her and right now, he was second guessing that decision too. what if she needed to know? WHAT IF, NOT WANTING TO HURT HER, HE HAD MADE IT WORSE AND HAD SOMEHOW PUT HER IN MORE DANGER? HE FELT SICK. HE FELT SICK TO HIS STOMACH, AND PROBABLY ALWAYS WOULD. he smiled rather.. sadly. "i'll make you the best cake anyone has ever seen. and others will be there, yeah, but.. it will be for you and for me. and once that happens? WE WILL BE THAT INSUFFERABLE COUPLE THAT REFUSES TO LEAVE EACH OTHER'S SIDES FOR MORE THAN THEY HAVE TO. we'll get another dog. we'll get those rings and those stupid matching t-shirts we once talked about and.. we'll have our life. no more of this. yeah?" it was a dream that he wanted more than anything that he had ever wanted in his entire life and right now, he was damn sure of that much. and holding on? it gave him hope. WASN'T HE? yes. "cee. even if they weren't being serious, i.." he would have done that all the same and he would have worried all the same, but they were. he knew THAT much. "... he's been in paul's office too. your house, clearly. your room. it's.. he's a monster." looking down at his hands, but.. this was him. wasn't it? he opened his arms a little bit, for her to come into them if she so wanted to. "COME HERE. IT'S OKAY, I.. I JUST NEEDED A MOMENT." he needed to be able to breath and.. it wasn't about her. he loved her. god, he loved her so much that it hurt - if anything, it had been about the reminders of something like that and about how it hit him. "I... WHEN I SAID WE COULDN'T TRUST ANYONE, THAT YOU COULDN'T TRUST ANYONE.. i meant.. yes, even him. cee, that person in the past, they knew things that.. only someone that would have been close to you would have KNOWN. big things. i.." he needed to sit down. in fact, he needed all of this to be over and he needed to sleep for a whole ass week, until.. everything was better. but of course that he couldn't do that, not until he knew that she was SAFE. right? ".. i know what you're doing," sighing. of course. "and yeah, i would. of course i would. it still doesn't change that, i.. okay, she's done bad things. BUT I LOVE HER. AND NO, NOT IN THE WAY THAT I LOVE YOU. NOTHING'S EVER COMPARED, BUT.. SHE'S MY FAMILY. i'm always going to defend her and.. for what it's worth? now? she's trying to do different. as much as i don't like that pretentious idiot green, he's.. i think they're good together. in the same way that you and i are good together. so.. if graham is good with leaving her be? I.. I'M FINE WITH HIM TOO." it felt like a compromise, because.. god, he truly did not want to fight in the slightest. no, she deserved so much better from him. didn't she? yes. "pretty sure both of them hate me," he reached forward, placing a lock of hair behind her ear. "but it's your opinion that counts." shaking his head and now, he was the one moving forward. "please don't even joke about that. I NEED YOU." / @xtinyslip

#cecilia ; convo #cecilia ; parker #tw: mental health #tw: abuse mention #tw: torture mention #always and forever :)

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sysig · 9 months ago

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The most fun you can have, barring the pain and torture (Patreon)

#Doodles #SCII #Damned #Helix #ZEX #Teisel #Max Vyer #Zack Fair #Vlad Masters #Weird fun fact??? The last time I posted Vlad was also in the same set as ZEX so uh????? Lol #I could not have possibly planned that so please just enjoy the serendipity - I certainly am lol #Anyway <3 Mostly leftover doodles for now! There's still more especially planned/in my notes but we're at a lull #And it's time for some silliness! :D Love silliness!#Starting with a very cute tiny ZEX ??ing at slippers - he really didn't wear footwear much - or at least it wasn't mentioned so lol #Max has barefoot energy too it's fine lol #And ZEX only wears shoes in his VUX form sometimes! Surely it's just as unnecessary for humans! Hehe #After I doodled him holding a pencil like half-properly I realized oh yeah - he wouldn't do that unless directed would he haha #Much more natural to curl - or at least as close as possible with fingers - around his writing implement :D #I do wonder what he'd think of human calligraphy brushes hmm - more natural? Less? He'd certainly enjoy watching but when doesn't he <3 #Oh I loved him sitting and enjoying the rain ♥ Reminded me of Gaster :D Though this came well-first hehe <3 #Just a very pleasant detail - amphibious lad loving precipitation hehe #Another simple one of hanging out with Teisel ugh he kicked his legs in the absence of his tail he's so cute weh ;;♥#Hey Max is actually here for a change!! I want to give him more attention he deserves it - especially with everyone being so mean to him :')#He just wants friends! He's barely here be nice to him while he is! At least Peter was nice to him haha #You only think he's creepy because you think he's fake and ZEX is real - they're both real don't be mean #Max's clinginess is so sad here haha :') Protect him pls <3 #I love ZEX's asides with Vlad lol ♪ Man I really haven't drawn him in ages too long!#Okay but the image of ZEX in a nurse costume? Amazing he'd rock it - Max even moreso since he'd understand the context <3 #Get this man in a skirt and heels stat he'll look So pretty ♫

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scoobydoodean · 1 year ago

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I see this held up as major proof of Dean's badness, but couldn't it also be proof of Cas having faith Dean can get past anything without Cas having to change his behavior? The way it's structured the onus is on DEAN to work through it, not others to change or make amends. ---- CASTIEL: You know, Dean, he – he feels things more acutely than any human I've ever known. So it's possible he could work through this. One day, he may explode and let it all out and breathe deeply and move on.

I see what you mean in a general sense, and it's extremely possible that Cas is thinking about his own past fights with Dean and Dean forgiving him, and from the perspective of the critique you have in mind that you're refuting, I agree. But of course deancrit casgirls will forever insist that Cas has never in his life done anything harmful to Dean either accidentally or on purpose, so any time Dean might dare try to hold him accountable for anything, he's actually just making shit up and being toxic and controlling, so here Cas is just apologizing for his own abusive relationship. You can only get their take by being deliberately obtuse/disingenuous.

That said, the context of that line (from 15.13 "Destinty's Child") is Cas answering soulless Jack's question about whether Dean will eventually forgive him for murdering Mary.

CASTIEL: Hey, Jack. JACK: Cas, you know what's good about being dead? CASTIEL: Uh, as I recall, very little. JACK: Well, when you come back, you – you really get into all that life is. Hot, cold, sweet, spicy, funny, scary. CASTIEL: And are you? "Into it"? JACK: I want to be. But I don't... feel things the way I used to. Before I lost my... CASTIEL: Your soul. JACK: I used to feel things. In my bones. It was glorious, and sometimes unbearable. But I felt them. Now, I understand joy or sadness, but... I know those things aren't in me. I understand why Sam and Dean were angered by what happened to Mary... CASTIEL: By what you did to Mary. JACK: Yes. I see that I've caused them pain. And it's clear that things have changed. Especially with – with Dean. Will he ever forgive me? CASTIEL: You know, Dean, he – he feels things more acutely than any human I've ever known. So it's possible he could work through this. One day, he may explode and let it all out and breathe deeply and move on. JACK: How long will that take? CASTIEL: I don't know.

And yeah—I have seen people refer to Cas's little speech here as "condoning child abuse" and other bullshit. Because how DARE Dean not forgive soulless Jack for murdering his mother (something soulless Jack is unable to actually really acknowledge he did). I mean clearly any time someone murders your mom because she made them mad and threatened their sense of security by asking if they're okay and saying their concerning actions can’t stay a secret… That’s just natural understandable stuff! You need to forgive the person who murdered her instantly and if you don’t idk you’re kinda overreacting don’t you think? :/ I mean your mom probably deserved it kind of anyway for reading the room so wrong and talking about getting a person help. And I mean if you don't forgive the person who killed your mom or do anything trying to stop them from hurting more people you're really a child abuser... toward an adult... who murdered your mother in cold blood and is unable to even understand why it was wrong in any sense other than an intellectual one like he read it from a book... preferring to refer to it as "What happened to Mary" instead of acknowledge it as something he himself did because he was mad and felt threatened—which is what he circled back to in "Jack In The Box" too. It's only when Jack gets his soul back that he's able to actually feel true empathy, acknowledge his real actions and the gravity of them, and give an actual sincere apology. Because his soul is actually important—something this fandom refuses, by and large, to notice.

Anyway, this fandom's take on Mary's murder and soulless Jack vs. regular Jack is overwhelmingly a bag of wet third grader vomit and feces so what can one expect?

#mail #soulless jack killing mary is popularly regarded as an accident... but it's pretty transparent that it wasn't?#or rather it was on purpose but he regretted it the second after it happened. but that is still. Something he chose to do. Not an accident.#He saw her as a threat to his relationship with Sam and Dean and he acted.#This is indicated right before he kills her. He admits it outright also right before calling it an accident which unravels that whole idea.#It wasn’t pre-meditated but in that moment he wanted her to die. She was going to tell everyone there was something wrong with him.#And he did not want that.#It wasn't an accident and he can't handle his own culpability because it threatens his belief that he can make things be the way they were #before it happened. Which is why he killed her to begin with! He didn't want anyone to know/think anything was wrong with him!#And just like soulless Jack just wants everyone to forget about it and act like nothing happened and he's fine...#Many fans want Dean to forget about it. They want Dean to believe and say and feel and think that Mary did not matter.#And that being upset at her literal murder (even if it was an accident—which it was not) is bad and evil.#And Sam's great capacity for numbness (which we already saw in season 13) strengthen's their own lack of empathy for Dean #in a situation that in real life they would understand unless they're actual psychopaths.#It's only because Dean is a character in a narrative representing the need/capacity to be loved and accepted at all #that these demands that his thoughts and feelings bend to everyone else's emotional needs become so disturbingly intrusive #dont feed the stans after midnight #and cas is my best friend #hot girl cas

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roobylavender · 1 year ago

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considering what you have spoken about regarding selina do you also get frustrated with like…i cant quite explain it but sometimes especially in more recent years shes been posed or positioned like some sort of damsel that needs a big strong man to save her and like im not saying she should be portrayed with the “hollywood level feminism” for lack of a better term im just think about how old versions of selina would have hated that. like im just thinking of anytime in the reeves movie where bruce grabs her or forces her mouth shut or even when he didnt allow her to kill falcone and im just thinking she should claw the fuck out of him for that. i just miss a version of selina who wouldnt allow anyone to walk all over her personal autonomy like that

oh absolutely! in fact this is specifically why i can't stand loeb's take on her character lol (and as we both know that was a significant point of reference for the reeves film). it's really jarring to transition from her volume one and two canon to the long halloween / dark victory / when in rome. i think a lot of people tend to latch onto these books because tim sale's art is to die for and it's obv hard not to enjoy a good murder mystery. in that aspect they're still books i can enjoy in isolation. but i find it very difficult to enjoy them as a selina fan specifically because in every single one it's like she's looking for solace and security in a man and i'm not sure why. like what was so bad about her original backstory of having a deadbeat dad (whether you ascribe to the volume one or volume two version of him) and why did she need to go looking for her "real" father in carmine falcone. why did she need to seek out temporary boytoy relief in italy. why did she dream about being saved by bruce. none of it really has a reason other than to create a "lack" in her for the sake of it being there, because she'd never needed a man like that before in her post-crisis narrative. as you mentioned it was quite to the contrary and she was fiercely independent and protective of her own peace, esp from men. when she felt empty or without a connection or lifeline to someone real, it was mostly about people like maggie or holly or arizona. her people

what i think it ultimately comes down to are two things: the first thing is the diminishment of her post-crisis origins. after all, it's convenient to ignore how distrustful selina is of people, and of men with power at their leisure to abuse specifically, when her post-crisis origins are no longer relevant to her personal characterization. although selina's status as a sex worker is more prominent now, it was more or less completely swept under the rug for the bulk of volume two. loeb also refused to engage with it in any capacity. it only really resurfaced with the conclusion to volume two because it drew direct parallels to how we initially found her in volume one, and then brubaker expanded on it once again in his take on the character, which was notably juxtaposed against a pre-existing romance with bruce and brings me to the second thing. i've already waxed about this at length so this may very well be recap but i really don't think selina's lack of control over her personal autonomy can be divorced of the modern portrayal of the romance. when selina looking for security and understanding and comfort in bruce is what drives the romance forward there's not much room to maintain her original values and guarded demeanor, if not her outright defensiveness and hostility. a lot of people look at the extensive trauma selina has experienced and argue that she deserves to be in a relationship with someone who allows her to let those walls down. this isn't incorrect in theory. but it does repeatedly ignore who she is. it's kind of like the point i was making about bruce yesterday. exploring the inherently abusive nature of robin or of bruce's right to his children in light of that fact is interesting to do, but the actual execution has rarely managed to take into account who bruce actually is

for however nice it might be for selina to let her walls down romantically and look for solace in bruce—and i say this mostly for the sake of argument, personally i would argue against its necessity—it's realistically not something she's actually going to do. at least not as willfully as she's been portrayed to. realistically she's going to make it extremely hard, which if anything is precisely the appeal. i love it when selina gives bruce a hard time. i love that it's not supposed to be easy or maybe even a possibility for him to win her over bc there's so much about his own ideological stances that's flawed and in opposition to her own. she doesn't have to be any less unrelenting in her principles and worldview for that romance between them to be compelling bc at the end of the day the entire crux of it is that against all odds bruce cares. for however wrong he thinks she might be in a given moment or in her stance against the government, he knows who she is and how hard she's fought and what she's survived and it makes him sympathetic to her because she's real. she's a wonderful character through which to explore the logical limits of bruce's self-righteousness and categorization of crime, as well as a wonderful mirror to hold up to his face as he starts to ask himself whether what he's doing is really the only means of keeping the city safe. and the novelty of it all is that you don't have to sacrifice her character for any of that to be true. writers have simply deluded themselves into believing that they have to and that's why we are where we are today

#you're so real about the reeves movie btw i think she should have kicked him off of a building personally #outbox #also not something i mentioned above but i think a looooot of people cling to bronze age selina #because it was purportedly her first 'positive' portrayal. personally i would argue against that though #i think her golden age iteration was plenty 'positive' and there was an inherent understanding that although she loved supervillainy #she wasn't necessarily evil in a way comparable to other rogues. she always had an inclination towards mercy and bruce Noticed that #which is what made their relationship really interesting. bc she was committing crimes and in his head he was like #yeaaaah she's wrong. but she's also not hurting anyone per se. and she's so pretty. let me turn a blind eye it's fine #these were more generic ideas that newell subsequently rewrapped in new skin and then further developed along a political lens #but i think a lot of people comparatively prefer bronze age selina bc it fully embraced a romance in the most traditional sense #so at the end of the day a lot of the fan sentiment really comes down to preferring wish fulfillment over good storytelling. at least imo #bronze age selina to me is one of the most boring characters ever. and i also hate that she has to 'prove' she's no longer villainous to br #to bruce. and the fact that he suspects her. like since the 40s it's been word of law by the ogs that bruce Doesn't suspect her #he's the first person to not suspect her while everyone around him is judging him for it #i know writers and perspectives change etc etc but when that's what the original creators of both characters are telling you #i feel like it has to hold some weight #so yeah. bronze age might as well be the shit under my shoe it's so boring and bland and most of all ahistorical #bronze age batkat i mean

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callmeevilspawn · 2 days ago

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Alex knew something was wrong with Jo. No matter how much she tried to say she was okay. They were both the type to not be okay, but pretend in a way because it was easier then confronting the truth about it all. They rather hide behind the sadness and hide the fact something happened. That is just who they were, and Alex knowing something is going on, but not wanting to overstep. He felt Jo would come to him when she was ready, but in the end, she was used to no one being there, the same as him, and maybe it would be where she didn't say anything and Alex had to get her to talk to him even when she doesn't want to.

He also knew something was up because Jo was avoiding him. She had dodged him every chance she got. Not that he wouldn't do the same thing, but he wasn't sure how much longer this could go on. He knew she was struggling with something but he didn't know what. But he had to get her to talk to him because he also knew Jo couldn't go through this alone. That is now who they were, and that is not who he was. Letting her go through something alone. But Alex, he didn't know how to ask, because he knows how he can come off sometimes and even with Jo, he knows he has to watch his tone sometimes. But this was something different and he couldn't put his finger on it. But he wanted to talk to her, away from people and away from ears and just see what he can do.

But then they came face to face and he could tell she didn't expect to see him there. But Alex was working on a case, and one where Robbins trusted in him and it was all about finding something out about a kid where the parents just didn't believe him. But that could be on hold as he turned to Jo, and he wanted to have her just not let her mother win. Her father didn't deserve to win either. "You need to try harder Jo, this isn't you. I know it is hard to hear, but you were the same person before you knew and after you knew. That doesn't change who you are and what you're doing with your life." He knew that was hard to hear but he wanted to make sure she knew he wasn't going anywhere. But she was lost and he could see that.

"That is the thing, you are thinking too much into it. Before you knew, you were fine and you were still you. The way you came about is not going to change if you know. But what can change is show anyone can come from that and be more then what they were handed. I know I don't understand fully, but you, you are the person I am doing life with, and that doesn't scare me away either. I am here because I want to be and I love you. Just, don't let it come between you and your way of living please. That is not worth it." He was being honest and knew she needed to hear it. But her knowing doesn't change and her knowing that she came from what she did, it doesn't change who she is now and who Alex is with. "Just don't let it set you back. Push forward and prove everyone wrong. That is all I am going to say."

@callmeevilspawn

You build a dream; a fantasy of the reality you want. When it came to thinking about her parents she always wondered. What they looked like? What job they had? Jo always had questions she craved to get answers to. Jo made up a dream version of her mother and father. And when that dream breaks it destroys you.

Jo didn’t expect to ever go after her mother. She never thought she needed to. She was abandoned at two weeks old. She was left out to dry. Her mother thought leaving her at a fire station meant she’d be okay. That it didn’t make her more selfish then she was. Jo took the abandonment with a gain of salt. Once she was an adult she stopped wondering; she told herself she didn’t care. But then she was married; a place Jo never thought was possible. But she found love; she loved Alex so much. And he wanted kids; she wanted to build a family with him. But the fear that she came from a crazy genes is what triggered her; made Jo follow the lead to find her mother. She didn’t know what to expect. But she definitely didn’t think she’d find herself frozen altering her own life.

That day; the day she sat across from her mother haunted her mind. It changed how Jo saw herself. Learning she was a product of rape; she was a child that her dad forced himself upon her mom. That’s why Ruth could barely look at her; she was tapping her hands against the table avoiding eye contact. She told her honest answers; some Jo wasn’t prepared to hear. It was the way she showed no care or emotion for her. Jo was so excited and nervous and now she felt broken. Like her vision of parents was non-existent. Jo was quiet; she wanted to feel nothing. Of course Alex asked how it went; and all she said was okay before going stone cold. Jo was distant, she was stuck in her own mind.

She didn’t eat; she cried herself to sleep. She drank too much; she was getting dangerous; she put vodka in her water bottle barely finding the function to work. She lashed out at the man she loved. She pushed Alex away to where he didn’t want to come to loft; the place they lived.

She was moody; she was lifeless almost. Jo wanted to debate letting go to make the pain stop. But she also wanted to get back the life she had; the happy place she at before seeing her mother. She wanted to be the wife Alex deserved She wanted to be the surgeon she once was. But the thought of going back to happy felt so hard. She was hiding herself; she was trying to breathe again. Tonight he came back; and she felt like the air returned to her body. That she could breathe again. Jo never intended on telling him; she wanted to keep this broken piece of herself hidden. But one glance; she saw the way he stood at ta distance and she broke.

She said the words; that sounded crazy. Sounded like Jo didn’t sleep enough. But she was disgusted with herself. All she wanted was to feel whole again. Of course Alex was going to tell her how it was. Her mother didn’t matter, but she did to her. Feeling the weight of the bed shift under her; Jo arched her eyes towards the man she loved. Rolling over onto her side she leaned into his arms. Wanting to feel something; feel like she was capable of loving him again.

“ You don’t understand. I dreamed about meeting her for so long. And when I did she wanted nothing to do with me. Because of what he did. I know I’m crazy for wanting to feel loved by her. But she’s my mom.” Nonsense and crazy is what the brunette felt like. Leaning her head into his shoulder she let eyes shut feeling a bit lighter; knowing she wasn’t harboring a secret.

“ You make it sound so easy Alex..” Humming the comment; she took him in; holding onto the sound of his heartbeats.

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