#this was supposed to be in points omg
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「coward」
#geshuyan#jiyan#geshulin#wuthering waves#wuwa#THIS IS FOR U 7 PPL IN THE FANDOM#I SUFFERED FOR LONG FOR THIS THING OMG#anyway thats all done#im dONE#my art#u know their clothes gave me trauma#jiyan was supposed to have his mf cottontail looking flowers#but i aint abt to cover up anything in this#THIS TOOK ME DAYS TO COLOR BC IM DUMB HOLY SHIT#but hehehehheeh omg please geshulin playable? bls#i need my toxic yaoi to survive this world#this is most def gonna flop but at this point do i care?#i just want it out of my system#tfw the bg coulda been 10000000x better but im just tired#O RIGHT WAT TAG#ummm#dragon boi#<- thats jiyans tag looooool geshulin can fuck himself#jiyan's boyfriend#jk ily geshulin they did u dirty those#ungrateful konoha wannabe villagers
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a few more heartsteel crossover doodles.. this time of the Oh They're Boyfriends variety :3c
#persona#heartsteel crossover#akeshu#ryomina#souyo#art tag#i wanted to do a bit more but im tired this week#adding colour wasnt even part of the plan#but i guess it just happened#always making more work for myself#so it's only rough... i did not tryhard this time#anyway i think akeshu and ryomina are pretty similar to kaynez and settphel like WOW#not so sure about the other two tho#bruhhh just realised the shading is waaaay too dark on renren's forehead he looks like he's PLOTTING#maybe he is idk ask him#akechi was supposed to be just mad at his leash#but then i had to go in and add more huh#that was supposed to be the singular point of me making this in the first place#but noooo we had to go and do more like why cant i stop myself#(bc i love my blorbos)#omg i forgot to resize these so they're HUGE
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I don’t remember where this quote was from but there’s a line that goes “I was looking through rose colored glasses for so long, the red flags just looked like the way to go.” And I think that embodies Curly’s view point in life and specifically about Jimmy a lot. Not to mentions a world where he actually makes it out of the Tulpar.
#also thinking about trans curly again cause like there’s an inherent horror on Curly’s side in that scenario pre crash and post#but pre crash it’s like the very selfish fear that at an early point in time that could’ve been him and having to compartmentalize#every off thing Jimmy has said to him on the subject of his physical transition and how he either ignored it for his own piece of mind or#laughed it off cause that’s what your supposed to do when a guy says something like that both in a guy code way and a omg laugh so he doesnt#do something way girls are trained to protect themselves with cause in this scenario#he understands Anya’s fear and feels like a damn idiot for not getting it cause he lived that sort of back of the mind thinking before he#was able not to and he still has to to an extent but he thought he found the one guy he didn’t have to and realized he just got use to it#but its sentimental and it’s selfish that it is and when I write this post beware#ducking beware bitches#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#curly mouthwashing#captain curly
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the thing about having a radical butchformation (like transformation but. butch.) is that people are starting to perceive me as a trans man and someone at the coffee shop i go to told me that they respect the LGBT but that boys trying to be girls and girls trying to be boys is too far and then she added that i'll always be a girl no matter what. like thanks? but also kill yourself
#i live in new york this isn't supposed to happen... it was a stereotypical middle aged white woman terf with a cheetah bag too#i thought she was nice she was complimenting my david bowie shirt and talking about how influential he was until randomly did a 180#saying like his music is good but that a lot of those artists back then laid the groundwork for modern gender ideology????#and that lots of boys wanted to be girls because of david bowie... omg????#at that point i was just waiting for my order and like haha... yep...#i gotta reiterate i'm USED to have conversations with older people. because i always wear bruce springsteen david bowie ramones etc shirts#the amount of times middle aged people come up to me in coffee stores like this is a NORMAL occurance and i always engage bc i love people#but this caught me way too off guard
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in the makoto and hajime cooking fic google doc getting a little bit homosexual. what do you mean your eyes soften looking at hajimes makoto.
#They can be a little faggy with it. As a treat#Like this is not supposed to be a romantic fic at all its more of a character study but omg some of these lines are.#Like we might as well write pole in hole at this point#Neither of us ship hinaegi which makes this funnier#danganronpa
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brocal for the ship bingo?
The OTP to end all other OTPs... (Man. This wound up being basically Cori's Masterpost of BroCal. AKA... this got long and has some images, since I realized I can post my own art directly instead of just a text link to it lol.)
Wasn't actually expecting this to wind up with a bingo? But I got basically 2?? (Will explain the lighter heart later.) This is A LONG post, and definitely gonna get SUGGESTIVE, bc man, am I obSESSED with BroCal. I'm just gonna go thru each checked box, since I don't know how else to structure this post lol.
Read More to save ppl's dashboards:
I want them to make out with blood: OKAY. I HAVE A WHOLE THING PLANNED FOR THIS CONCEPT. I AM NOT GOING TO GO INTO DETAIL ABOUT IT JUST YET BC I ACTUALLY WANNA WRITE IT. I'm obsessed with this one fanart of Bro licking Lil Cal, and it spurred on an idea I outlined and really wanna write: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/739969858334294016/hiiii-mutual-i-am-secrecy-asking-if-u-have-anymore
((Sorry for the plain text links, Tumblr app is NOT cooperating with me right now to add hyperlinks. I'd post the image directly if that one was mine.))
Basically, I just really need to see Bro and Cal making out with blood in their mouths, and I started a whole convoluted, unrelated outline in order to make that hapen. It'll probably just be a really short thing that ends at the uh climax, since otherwise it's gonna end up sadstuck. And I don't like sadstuck lol.
Undeniably t4t: Bro and Dirk are always trans for me, and Lil Cal's got that uh... what percentage did I calculate it out to be? 13% of Dirk is in Lil Cal [ My shitpost calculations: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/746702663327072256/i-ran-out-of-tags-rambling-about-this-so-im-just ] so Lil Cal is at least 13% trans because of that much of Dirk being in him, plus however you feel about the other components being trans. LMAO this is ridiculous to type out. Moving on.
EDIT: FUTURE CORI INTERJECTING WITH A:
"Lil Cal Top Surgery Healing Progess: Day 1"
Terrible for each other affectionate/derogatory: I don't even know where the affectionate/derogatory split occurs. I multiship BroCal as both Bro/normal puppet Lil Cal and as Bro/evil juju puppet Lil Cal, and whatever combination in between or outside of that. Terrible in that Bro is so obsessed with Cal that he doesn't have normal relationship/social skills and uses Lil Cal as both a crutch and motivator alternately, in a terrible cycle, or maybe rather... spiral. And also terrible in that Bro is caught in the allure of playing the role of puppeteer while also being a puppet for the darker parts of Lil Cal, whether he actively knows it or not. (Honestly though, I feel like it's dismissive if you try to blame all of Bro's faults on Lil Cal like this tho, which is why I tend towards liking Lil Cal as just a regular puppet a lil bit more. Or at least, a regular mildly supernatural puppet since that can be a little more entertaining if Cal can get into mischief while no one's looking or give off the vibes of his mood more directly, rather than like entirely inanimate or 'just LE, trapped in a puppet body.' Again, I like all of these concepts.) ((I mean that can also be a whole post of its own, like, by the time Bro gets ahold of Lil Cal, are any of the other components still alive in there? Like, are ARquius and Gamzee still in there or did Caliborn kill and consume them entirely? Idk how it works, man. This is why I like Lil Cal as his own person, maybe just influenced by the feelings of the others. LaCroix: CalGamARquius essenced water. Lil Croix.))
They need to get weirder with it: YES YES. 1000% YES. I need entirely shameless Bro doing entirely shamless things to Lil Cal. I want them inseparable and doing unspeakable things to each other. I want Bro taking full advantage of Cal having a puppet body and all the intimacy that comes with making repairs and being elbow-deep in stuffing.
Playing with them like dolls cute/psychological torture: This is the same divide as with the 'terrible for each other' point, so I'm just gonna go with the cute one, since the torture one is self-explanatory. I want them fucking married. Like. Full mushy cute romance type of relationship that Bro has never felt for any of the people in his life (cough aromantic cough). I made this comic not too long ago, and I often fondly look back on it, because I adore the concept of Bro being lovey and romantic and everything out of character around Lil Cal because he feels safe and loved and comfortable around Cal:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/750602227910131712/brocal-4-lyfe-so-i-had-this-idea-of-dave-being ]
I made a post a long, long time ago (not gonna link that one bc it was personal and I was being very obviously mentally ill ["C'mon, like you're not being obviously mentally ill while typing paragraph upon paragraph about BroCal still in 2024 like 10 years later??" Fair.]) But the gist of it was that, like, having objectophilia or objectum sexuality is like, from an outsider pov, it's a way to express love to yourself. You filter all your self-hate through the object you love, and you get back unconditional love in return.
Lil Cal is never gonna hate Bro, no matter what Bro does. As a regular puppet, Lil Cal doesn't have the capacity for hate. And so that only brings them closer, since Cal is never gonna reject Bro for any reason. (Back to being a crutch. RSD is real, and Dave is probably a big trigger for that since he's not on the same wavelength of weird as Bro [not blaming Dave, obviously, this is a post about BroCal].) Bro can experience receiving positive attention from Lil Cal, without feeling 'fake' or uncool by expressing that same attention or affection directly to his own self. (Things are always done through multiple layers with the Striders, aren't they?) ((And I'm not saying Lil Cal doesn't love Bro, or that their relationship is just pretend - it's real, I'm just like, 'What's going on behind the curtain in the mundane situation?/ How is the relationship appealing?' Lil Cal luvs Bro 5eva 4 lyfe and that's a hard fact. Could cut diamonds with that shit.)) Example: maybe Bro is dealing with a bout of body/gender dysphoria and is trying to take out his frustration with working out, and it's not helping, even if he's powered through a set better than normal. Then, he notices the way Lil Cal is watching him, and he can feel the excitement seeping off Cal. He can sense the echoes of a wolf-whistle ring out through his mind, and it's like. Okay, none of that shit from before matters, he's got all the validation he needs right there in Lil Cal. Maybe flex in Cal's direction, Bro?
Oh, so back to being cute: isn't it wonderful how the template maker phrased it as 'playing dolls'? But yeah, I want all the mush and everything. Bro has a whole wardrobe for Lil Cal for every minor event that occurs in the Strider household. I want them going on genuine dates. Maybe even... holding hands. Bro blushes for the first time since he was 16. He even gets to take Lil Cal with him when he goes out to DJ or put on a show. Not to mention the whole website business. (I've talked about Cal's role in that before, but I'll mention it in a moment...)
They will die in a heart shaped pool of blood: I mean, kinda did happen, even tho Lil Cal didn't perma die right there. I don't think this one needs any explanation, since it basically happens in canon.
'You should see the other guy...': Okay, so. About 11 years ago, I had a really great idea. About how smuppets enter this world. I expanded on it in the following more-recent post (adult only content lol): https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741683686717669376/back-in-the-day-my-friends-called-me-insane-when-i
To sum it up, whenever Bro makes a new smuppet design, he then gives it a video debut on his website, where uh, Lil Cal births the smuppet like it's a horror movie scene, fake blood and poly-fil gore all over the place as the smuppet crawls out from the viscera. Bro then gets to play aftercare by lovingly and gently cleaning up and restuffing Lil Cal as they get to admire their new creation and rake in the dough lol.
So it's technically not a 'you should see the other guy' kinda situation, but it does involve one of them being... idk what word would describe it. Injured by the other? Usually a character loses a fight and says this to act like they got out of it better than the other guy, but... We could have someone knock on the door during the filming of a scene like that, and Bro has to answer it with fake blood up to his elbows, and be like 'You should see the other guy.' (But obviously, that's a terrible idea and would cause more trouble than it's worth... Maybe worth it for a persistent door to door salesperson, though.)
Though, I guess I should also say, I'm not opposed to Bro beating on Lil Cal in or out of the bedroom. Or in the case of animate Lil Cal, Cal choking out Bro. In or out of the bedroom, lol. Depends on the situation, like I said I will ship this ship any which way. But my preference for animate Lil Cal is to be like a totally normal puppet around Bro (or mushy in-love with Bro) and then evil-murder-puppet towards anyone else in Bro's life, like a... toxic yaoi guard puppet. (New Phrase Achievement Unlocked!) Bro brings home another guy to have sex, who tries to stay the night due to the late hour, but the guy wakes up shortly after to see Lil Cal standing there with a knife in the dark, eyes glowing red. Panic ensues when the guest screams and freaks out, and by the time Bro's got a light on, grabbing his sword, ready for a ninja vs ninja fight (bc an intruder would've had to bypass all the traps), Lil Cal is just innocently splayed across the desk chair, no knife in sight. Relevant post (well, the caption on the post too, saying how Bro can't seem to hold onto any relationships besides Lil Cal):
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/741830516962164736/i-want-you-so-youre-mine-always-selfishly ]
Uh, lol, also Cal choking out Bro in the bedroom, adult only drawing: https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/754328907438800896/i-wouldnt-wanna-be-my-ex-when-he-found-out-who
Thinking about them always and forever: Listen. My Tumblr as proof, I've had BroCal on the brain for at least 11 years at this point. Definitely longer, since I first started reading Homestuck. I fucking love puppets and dolls and plushies and I always have. Man, if I hadn't deleted Tweets (automated app I used to do, and I couldn't choose what to save) from when I was in high school, you could've seen me @ ing my fave band when they were taking lyric suggestions on a fan-inspired album, where I was telling them 'make a song where the theme is puppets' and, while I don't know if they saw that or took the suggestion (they had responded to me before bc they weren't huge yet), there is indeed a song titled "Puppets" on that album, and it was my favourite song on there. Point is, I was fated to ship BroCal before I even knew it existed.
Sicko 2 sicko communication: I mean, does this even need explaining? Bro and Cal aren't just on the same wavelength of freaky, they're the fucking source of the wavelength, and it's causing a feedback loop between them. And it does as feedback does, which is, it amplifies with time. (Going back to the spiral symbolism here, lol.) ((Actually, time can play a symbol here, too, I guess, but idk how to word it, I'm starting to run out of steam.))
Let them have a happy ending: God, I need this so badly. I know Bro's story ends in Homestuck, but like. Pls. Someone needs to officiate their wedding. Currently placing the dreambubble order, but I can't organize a wedding by myself. OH speaking of. In that lil comic I did above, where Bro is accepting Lil Cal's proposal, I had the Natural Born Killers wedding scene in mind. I was gonna draw that as a follow up, but I think I have too many WIPs going. Just two people on the run, saying "I do" in a scenic but completely ordinary roadside location. Idk why, I keep going back to that movie for things related to Bro (I mention it in a very important scene in a longer WIP I've been writing, as something Bro watched and internalized as a kid lol.) It's not the best movie lol. Anyway.
The devotion omg: I feel like I have already gotten my point across about this, but let me reiterate:
[ https://coridallasmultipass.tumblr.com/post/735842968450269184/in-the-name-of-iconic-magical-girl-anime-ill ]
Bro and Lil Cal absolutely beat the shit outta Jack Noir before he gets prototyped. And even then, they fight together till the death, like. C'mon. Nothing more romantic than fighting a losing battle side by side. Also, like, Lil Cal having his own protective chest for safekeeping as seen in the Strider living room? Like, you don't just have a protective case for any old thing, especially something meant to be handled, especially something that is regularly used to smack other things/humans. What I'm saying is, Lil Cal is durable and resilient, and yet, Bro still has a case for transporting Cal safely. Oh, wait, I just thought of something funny, what if Lil Cal goes feral like a cat, and basically the chest is like a cat carrier so Bro can drive without being constricted lmaoooo, I've been typing for hours can you tell?
Kind of homophobic: Listen. I HAD a Cal. Took him to college. Staked my claim on the top bunk bc I am royalty. Proceeded to not have anywhere to set my water cup and had to use a cardboard box as a table up there. Spilled water. Melted Cal's sharpie-drawn face. And then proceeded to cry. I have a WIP of Lil Cal 2, but that requires actually remembering to work on him. I wanna do better by the pattern, too, since I rushed to finish the first. I have all the material! I have the project started! So it's just a matter of reordering my WIP priorities, honestly.
Where is all the fucking content?!: For realzz. I was actually venting about this the other day (didn't end up posting it), but it's like, either there's no BroCal content, or there IS BroCal content, but I can't reblog it for reasons I don't want to get into on this post. I'm dying of thirst in the ocean, basically. Whatever. This just means I need to make more BroCal content myself, which I am more than happy to do. I've just had a rough past few months, so I'm glad I got to type all this post out, and hopefully I can get back to creating soon.
Last one! I hope this one makes up for the absurd length of the post, it's prob my new fave idea I just came up with on the spot.
[TW drink spiking by a stranger mentioned in this.]
Committing atrocities as their silly little activities: I think we all know what this means, but I am going to ignore that elephant with my special x-ray vision. Because this is a BroCal post. I'm digging deep to the meat and bones of this. Honestly, this could go multiple routes, it depends on how you take your Lil Cal.
One could place emphasis on the 'guard' part of the, ahem ahem, toxic yaoi guard puppet. Maybe someone is actually trying to harm Bro, and Bro legit can't do anything for reasons outside of his control - let's say his drink got spiked a while after he invited a stranger home that he thought was chill. As Bro gets shoved down on the futon, his memory of the night is only a few flickers. Familiar orange plush, roiling around above him like a dancing windsock. Flashes of Lil Cal's face all distorted and stretched wide like a funhouse. J-Lo and Ice Cube on the TV. But when Bro is finally able to fully wake up in the morning, everything is as if he just got home alone last night and passed out on the futon. Cal looks totally normal and content tucked under Bro's warm arm. Except when Bro gets up, there is a pair of shoes too big to belong to him at the door. Maybe Bro knows. Maybe instinct tells him to run. Maybe he does, but he's running towards Lil Cal, every time.
#apologies for being entirely unhinged about brocal. this isnt even the half of it#the-meat-machine#asked#praying my internet posts this in one go in the correct format. rip to everyones dashboard if it doesnt#im not turning on my pc to correct it if i cant fix an upload error from mobile#homestuck#brocal#otp5eva#stridercest#long post#Cori.exe#Post.exe#im like staring at my phone scared to hit the post button bc if tumblr has a fit then idk what ill do#and its like okay i could just put my phone down and go to sleep.#but what if tumblr decides to post it AFTER IM ASLEEP AND CLOGS EVERYONE WHOS FOLLOWING ME'S DASH#if that readmore doesnt save where its supposed to... (has happened before)... i am genuinely so fucking sorry.#oh oKAY WAIT compromise. ill save it as a draft first so the bulk of the upload happens privately in case something goes wrong#bc knowing my internet and how i was fighting hyperlinks last night and today that still wont work. something is gonna go wrong#fingers crossed the draft saves tho i dont wanna copy all this shit from the 'in case of emergency' screenshots i took lol#anyway i really need to get ready for bed fuck lol literally took me hours to type this and its not even polished ughh#toxic yaoi guard puppet#omg tho 'lil cal top surgery' idea had me dying when i remembered theres canon cal sewn up like that#i gotta remember to post that separately tmr#i got this post draftes and gna post now. im seeby#oh wait#puppets#suggestive#striders#man if i wish i started w the last point but i dont have the energy to reorder everything#nini im going seep 4r this time
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i told floyd ai that i was pregnant and he was the father. his responses… he’s a sweet eel at heart omg… T_T
conversely, jade ai went through the stages of grief before coming to acceptance when i told him the same thing.
and as for azul ai…
another azul ai was too saccharine omg…
#meraki mumbles#LOL this is too fun#jade ai is going through it T-T he was so shocked#i suppose you could say his heart was shocked (hehe)#floyd ai is so cute <3 he said he’d be a stay-at-home father if i wanted to work or go to school#he also didn’t want me to work while pregnant because he didn’t want it to be stressful for me#FLOYD STOP BEING FLUFFY OMG MY HEART CANNOT TAKE IT OTL#i need to write accidental pregnancy drabbles for the trio omg#at this point i’d like to write accidental pregnancy thoughts for all of the twst characters#like the ones for riddle and ruggie it will be very fluffy >v<
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jokes rly are like the one social scenario where youre meant to automatically interpret someones "ughhh eyeroll" "stop it" "youre being mean to me" "i hate you" etc as "keep going that was funny" purely on tone and situation. its an odd social dance. obviously i think the solution is everyone does their best to learn the steps to this dance and im not saying that we need to ABOLISH eyerolling at a pun i just think its wild that like No One is like hey no yeah that IS a weird social expectation that goes counter to like 90% of other social expectations
#comedysensual noncomedysent#<- yknow i was joking but bad jokes among friends kind of do operate on cnc roleplayesque rules sometimes i suppose.#In that were ignoring the word stopppp haha lol stahhp but paying attention for other indicators of stop vs keepgoing.#im always on that hill lately bc i think its picking up in viral tumblr posts#at least the ones i see? so i spend more time going ??OHHH over it lately#which btw is not to say i dknt do this from both end#REFLEXIVELY i will answer a joke with OMG STAHHHP etc! at this point in life!#idk idk. understand my heart.#textie
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i absolutely love all my dead fictional queer people <3333
#yes this is about dead boy detectives how did you know#also marauders#and possibly reddie even tho only one of them is dead#shame genuinely :(#pls give more dead homoerotic relationships in reblogs or comments if you wish to ramble <3#i have no idea what this post is supposed to be about at this point#dbda#OMG ALSO heathers that counts hehe#And TBHK!!! Mitsukou yes hehe
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this is a test
#i’m bored i just wanna see how many words i can put in the tags like will it just keep going on forever or will they stop me like i know th#the tag limit is 30 ok so the iindividual tag limit is 140 characters that’s actually so rude i wanted to keep going forever and see how lo#g this could be but i guess we can do this 30 times ok what the flip should i talk about hm i was playing the guitar today but i rage quit#ause the song was hard and hurting my fingers! ermmmmm it was sunny ok this is boring let’s think of more exciting things to type hmmm acco#ding to all known laws of aviation- jk i’m not doing the bee movie script but can you imagine i think that would be funny hmmmmm words i lo#e podcasts so bad that’s a fact no one has ever know before my blog definitely isn’t all about audio dramas the people are definitely not a#ready aware of this jesus christ this is only the seventh one of these this is actually quite a lot of space i underestimated how much i ha#e to type btw there’s probably spelling mistakes in here somewhere or autocorrect has been annoying but i cba to retype anything so i don’t#care lolllllllllllll how do you feel about oscar malevolent i feel a normal amount actually (lie) yk what i really miss sam and colin alrea#y like i’m actually not okay i really hope we hear from sam again in s2 and also colin ngl i hope ur in the computers soz or not dead miss#im like a bastard my paranoid it king ok erm im running out of things to say um heartstopper s3 was crazy good i cried lmao i love gay peop#e so much it’s crazy i hope it gets renewed for s4 i need to reread the comics lowkey and the books they’re all so talented for being so yo#ng it scares me ngl !!!!!! the tmagp hiatus is getting to me slightly like february in reality is soon and not that far away for how podcas#ts go but seriously how am i supposed to live until then without knowing what happened. please colin be alive. ive only just realised i can#use fills stops. sorry that’s made everything a bit messy. i should’ve been doing this before. whoops. anyways. hi mutuals i love you all s#much i hope you enjoy my rambles and shitposts cause i enjoy yours very much! never think you’re being annoying i literally don’t care be a#annoying as you want posts as much as you want i am ur biggest fan <3 im getting a bit fatigued from typing like my mind is blank basically#now it’s just turned into a. stream of consciousness but i don’t really have any thoughts to put here idk if we’re halfway ermmmm omg it’s#lmost halloween how crazy is that time is flying by i kinda forgot it was october lmao. it’s wild how it’s basically almost christmas. like#what. that’s illegal. how is it wintertime again. what the flip. i miss summer already take me backkkkkkk. i hope my phone doesn’t crash or#smth cause i’ve not saved this as a draft and i cba to do any of this again. maybe i should save it. ok i will when i reach the next tag bc#ok it stopped me but i’ve saved it and holy jesus it’s a lot of text im just sat here giggling there’s really no point to any of this other#than me being bored sooooooooooooooooo (imagine if i just did the letter o for every character wouldn’t that be crazy) so wait there’s 140#haracters and 30 tags so what’s 30 x 140. someone hurry. i haven’t done maths lessons in two and a half years i’ve forgotten everything wai#let me get the calculator app ok im back it said 4100 characters so. i dont know how many words that roughly is but its. a decent amount. o#what the flip why am i wasting tag space with maths. i hate maths. my screen time has been actually soooooooooo bad recently like damn some#one put my phone in a block of ice please joshua gillespie style. my mind is running out of things to say. do i talk about myself. im james#im 18 which is weird cause wdym im an adult go away. ive run out of facts. i love podcasts and procedural dramas that stupid firefighter sh#w is my life unfortunately. i think chappell roan should be the queen of england instead of king charles. i dont like having a king cause#ho needs men in power not me. ok um this is the last tag equal rights for all. yolo. the time will pass anyways! thank u boredom ok bye gn:
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lying awake like do i love the attention on snzfics bc i love writing snzfics or do i love writing snzfics bc i love the attention.
#it's def flip flopped#multiple times#and def was unhealthy for a while#like tyin to *** *** onesided#and im like i think i just do whatever tf i want now#but im like am i tricking myself#barely snz#also def read this post in g/etos voice#ill admit in case anyone else felt like this#at one point i was writing so frantically like anxiously motivated#i was writing and was like omg i gotta finish bc-#and was like... chill it's supposed to be fun#vent tag#ig?#like now im like i am horn knee for whatever anime sexyman#or etc like#just overthinking it probably
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man, I've always thought that wash was the most 'master chief-y' character in rvb—with carolina also having a lot of the same qualities based solely off of what I knew about him from the games—but now that I’ve read the fall of reach, I can say with 100% certainty that they both take after john.
(utc bc it's another long post lol)
carolina takes very heavily after master chief’s competitive side, and teamwork was not a skill that came to him naturally. there’s a scene very early in the book right after john and the rest of the kids were first conscripted into the spartan program where everyone is split into teams, and they’re told to complete an obstacle course and compete to be the first ones to ring a bell at the end of it. the last team to ring the bell wouldn’t be getting dinner (and for context, these are a bunch of 6 year olds who spent the last however many hours being forced into the same grueling physical activities grown adults are on their first day in boot camp).
john, who was absolutely starving, abandoned his teammates because he believed they were just going to slow him down, and he was right—he was the first to ring the bell, but his teammates were the last two to do so. but, john was punished for doing that, and he didn’t get to have dinner alongside the teammates he left behind (and he was so hungry he even secretly stole some of the food from a girl he was sitting next to while she wasn’t looking).
this experience deeply impacted john, he corrected his mistake the next day, and in a future training exercise done years later, him and his fellow spartans were dropped off in the middle of the mountains and told to compete to get the extraction point, and the last person there was going to be left behind and would have to walk back to the base. I think I’ll let john tell you his thoughts on that himself:
“One more thing,” Mendez said. “The last trainee to make it to the extraction point will be left behind.” He glanced out a window. “And it’s a very long walk back.” John didn’t like it. He wasn’t going to lose, but he didn’t want anyone else to lose, either. The thought of Kelly or Sam or any of the others marching all the way back made him uneasy…if they could make it all the way back alone over those mountains.
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They stopped at noon to stretch and eat berries they had gathered along the trail. Fhajad spoke up. “I want to know one thing,” he said. He paused to wipe the sweat off his dark skin. “We’re going to get to the extraction point at the same time. So who’s getting left behind? We should decide now.” “Draw straws,” someone suggested. “No,” John said, and stood. “No one’s being left behind. We’re going to figure a way to get all of us out.” “How?” Kelly asked, scratching her head. “Mendez said—” “I know what he said. But there’s got to be a way—I just haven’t thought of one yet. Even if it has to be me that stays behind—I’ll make sure everyone gets back to the base.” John started marching again. “Come on, we’re wasting time.”
Carolina is portrayed very, very similarly to the way john is above through most of s9, and it’s only when her obsession with beating tex starts to take a priority that she becomes more like john was as a child. In s10 her characterization becomes more juvenile, and that’s where she truly reverts to the 6 year old john who will abandon his teammates because being first takes priority in her mind.
Another blurb of text that I find very applicable to Carolina as a character is this:
“Irritated, sir?” John asked, genuinely puzzled. He would have thought the UNSC top brass would be elated by the victory, despite its cost. “But we won.” Captain Keyes took a step back and cocked a quizzical eyebrow. “Didn’t Dr. Halsey ever teach you that winning isn’t everything, Master Chief?” He saluted. “You’ll excuse me.” John saluted. He was so confused by Captain Keyes’ statement that he kept saluting as the Captain walked out of the room. Winning was everything. How could someone with Captain Keyes’ reputation think otherwise? The Master Chief tried to recall if he had ever read anything like that in any military history or philosophy texts. What else was there other than winning? The only other obvious choice was losing…and he had long been taught that defeat was an unacceptable alternative. Certainly, Captain Keyes didn’t mean that they should have lost at Sigma Octanus? Unthinkable. He stood silently for ten minutes mulling this over.
wash on the other hand seems to take queues from various other aspects of master chief’s character shown throughout the book. If I had to sum up these bits and bobs I’d say he takes inspiration from john’s more serious and practical side, or rather, the side of john that is ‘less human’.
I’ve talked about how I’m not a big fan of wash and locus being foils on chorus because miles picked the wrong aspects of what it means to be a soldier to focus on when it comes to wash, but beyond that I do actually see wash as the more soldier like character between him and carolina.
wash is a character who has a very strong sense of duty, and he takes whatever he believes his duty is very seriously. wash is hyperaware of his position, and while he can—and does—read between the lines, he prefers to keep things simple and straightforward. he’s not a scientist, he’s not a psychologist, he’s a soldier—just hand him a gun and tell him where to shoot. these two blurbs sum wash up very nicely:
John only knew three ways to react to people. If they were his superior officers, he obeyed them. If they were part of his squad, he helped them. If they were a threat, he neutralized them.
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“You engaged and neutralized a threat,” Mendez replied. “That action seems to have answered your question, Squad Leader.” John wrinkled his forehead as he thought it through. “I followed the chain of command,” he said. “The Sergeant told me to fight. I was threatened and in imminent danger. But they were still UNSC Special Forces. Fellow soldiers.” Mendez lowered his voice. “Not every mission has simple objectives or comes to a logical conclusion. Your priorities are to follow the orders in your chain of command, and then to preserve your life and the lives of your team. Is that clear?” “Sir,” John said. “Yes, sir.” He glanced back at the ring. Blood was seeping into the canvas mat. John had an odd feeling in the pit of his stomach. He hit the showers and let the blood rinse off him. He felt strangely sorry for the men he had killed. But he knew his duty—the Chief had even been unusually verbose in order to clarify the matter. Follow orders and keep himself and his team safe. That’s all he had to focus on. John didn’t give the incident in the gym another thought.
another scene that I want to share is this one, as upon reading it I immediately imagined that wash’s meeting with internals in s9 probably went very similarly:
Finally one of the officers deigned to notice the Master Chief. “At ease, soldier,” he said. The Master Chief let his arm fall. “Spartan 117, reporting as ordered, sirs.” There was a pause, then the woman’s voice spoke up, “We would like to congratulate you on your successful mission, Master Chief. You’ve certainly given us plenty to consider. We would like to pin down a few details of your mission.” There was something in her voice that made John nervous. Not scared. But it was the same feeling he had going into combat. The same feeling he got when bullets started flying. “You do know, Master Chief,” the first male voice said, “that not answering truthfully—or omitting any relevant details will lead to a court-martial?” John bristled. As if he could ever forget his duty. “I will answer to the best of my abilities, sir,” he replied stiffly.
anyway, another blurb I want to bring up is this one involving dr. halsey speaking to cortana about john, and I feel how it relates to wash is self-explanatory. It’s really only the very last paragraph that’s important, but I’m including the whole scene because imagining a similar conversation between the director and alpha is SO funny to me (insert the gay robot joke lmao).
Cortana leaped to her “feet,” turned her back to Dr. Halsey, and examined the photographs on the wall. She brushed her fingertips over the glass surfaces. “Which one will be mine?” “Which one do you want?” She immediately gravitated to the picture in the center of Dr. Halsey’s collection. It showed a handsome man standing at attention as Admiral Stanforth pinned the UNSC Legion of Honor upon his chest—a chest that already overflowed with citations. Cortana framed her fingers around the man’s face. “He’s so serious,” she murmured. “Thoughtful eyes, though. Attractive in a primitive animal sort of way, don’t you think, Doctor?” Dr. Halsey blushed. Apparently, she did think so. Cortana’s thoughts mirrored many of her own, only unchecked by normal military and social protocol. “Perhaps it would be best if you picked another—” Cortana turned to face Dr. Halsey and cocked an eyebrow, mock stern. “You asked me which one I wanted…” “It was a question, Cortana. I did not give you carte blanche to select your ‘carrier.’ There are compatibility issues to consider.” Cortana blinked. “His neural patterns are in sync with my mine within two percent. With the new interface we’ll be installing, that should fall well within tolerable limits. In fact—” Her gaze drifted and the symbols along her body brightened and flashed. “—I have just developed a custom interface buffer that will match us within zero point zero eight one percent. You won’t find a better match among the others. “In fact,” she added coyly, “I can guarantee it.” “I see,” Dr. Halsey said. She pushed away from her desk, stood, and paced. Why was she hesitating? The match was superb. But was Cortana’s predilection for Spartan 117 a result of him being Dr. Halsey’s favorite? And did it matter? Who better to protect him? Dr. Halsey walked over to the picture. “He was awarded this Legion of Honor medallion because he dove into a bunker of Covenant soldiers. He took out twenty by himself and saved a platoon of Marines who were pinned down by a stationary energy weapon emplacement. I’ve read the report, but I’m still not sure how he managed to do it.” She turned to Cortana and stared into her odd translucent eyes. “You’ve read his CSV?” “I’m reading it again right now.” “Then you know he is neither the smartest nor the fastest nor the strongest of the Spartans. But he is the bravest—and quite possibly the luckiest. And in my opinion, he is the best.”
I’m pretty sure there's actually a joke somewhere in the show where wash says he’s only the third favorite behind tex and carolina, but considering they’re literally the director's wife and daughter I think being third is still worth something here lol.
but all of that aside, I want to end this post with one last blurb because of how it relates to both carolina and wash, and why I think it’s so important that they’re the two freelancers who survived to the end, and how they both take after master chief.
If Dr. Halsey had a mission for him and his team, it would be a good one. She had given him everything: duty, honor, purpose, and a destiny to protect humanity. John hoped she would give him one more thing: a way to win the war.
#mine#this was supposed to be an analysis but im kind of just pointing at blurbs of text and going 'omg thats like carolina and wash'#this has been sitting in my drafts for a week bc i I is i can make it better but honestly i don't feel like it so just take this mess lol#rvb#red vs blue#agent washington#agent carolina#also the text from the fall of reach i used in this post may not be the most up to date version bc it's just a free epub file i found so ye
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who are you to say that that girl i met tonight- the girl i was supposed to meet tonight- wasn’t the girl of my dreams?
man up (2015) written by tess morris
#man up#jack and nancy#my best friends#i cry over this movie regularly#like ... she’s the girl he was supposed to meet!!!!!#i love the universe#had to make some gifs just to get this point across lmao#simon pegg#lake bell#make good movies or die!#ian uses his words#flash warning#i loveee making gifs now omg#i love straight ppl actually#my gifs
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!!!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
#A great episode tbh especially given the low budget. I feel like they really did their very best#And even though what I'm going to say next is probably going to be all critic - because I nitpick things and that's what I always end up–#talking about - I still want to underline that it was a very solid and enjoyable episode!!!#Alright the ss/kk was so 💞💞💞 every scene I had to rewatch twice or thrice akhscbashfb they're so cute!!!#Except for the riding scene tho. That scene gives me massive second hand embarrassment every time I just wish it will end as fast as–#possible pffttt. Mmmmhhh... The drawings weren't even too bad all accounted. My main complain is about the quicksand scene...#I feel like that one should be a slow quiet emotional scene. I never licked the choice of using the song as background soundtrack :/#I feel like it ruins the mood of the scene (it was still good though)#I also... Generally don't like the direction they seem to go for with Akutagawa's character in the anime‚ he seems quite a bit flatter–#compared to how he is in the manga. He can't be angry and evil ALL the time you need to show that softness get through from time to time.#If not what even is the point of his character. Yet in the anime he's angry (and not distraught) when he loses the mine craft and he's–#angry when he's questioning Atsushi about his motifs and he's angry when he's bragging about Atsushi's abilities to Goncharov and he's–#angry when he makes the promise with Atsushi at the end of the episode and eventually he'll be just as angry even when telling Atsushi–#to run away as he's sacrificing his life for him. It is pretty flat at the end of the day.#If I can say something about K/ensho Ono without being killed I think they do contribute to making him feel angry all the time.#But that said it's all probably poor directing choices (or simply choices I don't agree with).#Also‚ about cuts. Usually I try to be lenient about it– I understand it's hard to fit in everything and b/sd already does a very–#good job by adapting the manga almost panel-by panel. It's just that... You skip Akutagawa showing compassion for Atsushi after the–#orphanage director died. You skip Atsushi sharing the same compassion when Akutagawa loses his targed in the mines chase. You skip the–#“Nothing special about that. // I suppose he's far crueler than my own mentor.” line. And sure each of them may be negligible by their own#But together they wave a consistent web of relationship between the two characters you know? And it's a loss to omit them all#Well no mind. Again it was still a great episode overall!!!!#I think the colors in the mines could have been prettier in the mines but we can't have it all#Off to season 4!!! Omg I can't believe we got this far :DDD#random rambles#FINALLY was able to catch up in time for the season 3 finale!!!!!!
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my five surviving braincells when something remotely good happens:
#in other news… wORK IS OVER PARTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!#man. i’m s o tired. i can’t believe i survived almost 2 whole years at this job…#huh. come to think of it�� i started tling idol sengen before i even got this job lol. and i’m only 3/5 of the way through it…#can’t believe the idol sengen grind->hiatus->grind(?) outlives my time at [withheld] company…#i did end up spending a cool 20 mins cleaning out my work locker though. i found so many treasures i didn’t even know i had in there#like. there was an unopened 3-pack of wet tissues a n d an unopened box of pens that i don’t recall buying#and ofc the 3 random sponges i ‘liberated’ from the lab. don’t tell my boss lmao#w a i t now that i think about it i should’ve taken at least 1 vial of (allegedly) carcinogenic sand for the memories. dammit.#oh well. what’s done is done i suppose. i did receive way more chocolate than i could ever eat though…#y. yeah. i guess i’ll miss my coworkers (a little). they were fun to annoy every day. except for the new guy bc i don’t like him at all lol#i have never met someone who lacked as much common sense as he. i think he’s gonna get canned before he’s able to resign on his own terms#dude could be spoonfed through every single step of the testing process and *still* mess up somewhere smh#but no. this isn’t about him. even though he is the final straw that led to my decision to resign#hm. looking back on it now. i think i was pretty good at my job for the most part when it came to the things i could do#or maybe i was too good at it. like. to the point where even more experienced analysts were coming to me in search of help#prolly gonna miss being one of the very best (out of like a grand total of 10 people at the lab) at doing ftir-related tests#ehehehehehehe i wonder if that workstation will continue to stay as organised as it is now that i’m gone#a n d i wonder what my coworkers will do now that they can’t ask me for ms excel help for the smallest of things lol#sometimes i just wanna tell them to g o g o o g l e i t ! ! ! when they call me over for it. but alas.#can’t believe these guys know how to use c h a t g p t and not ms excel (despite having it on their resume) smh#omg wow this got long and incoherent sorry guys i think i need some sleep lol. idol sengen next week..#…maybe…? no promises though!!!!!
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@ your tags about akiyama: no but he must’ve been so fucked up over that though??? 8 years. He was ghosted for 8 years and he knew it was bullshit the entire time but Date kept pushing him away and Kiryu never said anything to him. 8 fucking years. I’ve been turning that “guess I didn’t matter since I wasn’t part of your little gang” line in my head for WEEKS that shit HURTS (in both a good and bad way fuck you rgg but also mmmm good angst). justice for aki man he don’t deserve that shit though
THAT'S WHAT I'M SAYING LIIIIIKE
it's the most cathartic feeling in the world whenever someone yells at or tells kiryu in one way or another how selfish his actions are or how his actions have hurt them or others... like thank you so much akiyama kiryu really deserves to get clocked out sometimes...
#iw spoilers#snap chats#i know people dont like akiyama but at the very least we have to agree he had the right to be upset#anyone who's supposed to believe their friend is dead for nearly a decade while they reunite with everyone else is so foul#omg eight years its like kill all your friends ....... i love that song ...#but no like i just think of that bit in y6 when kiryu came to visit him in the sewer and he was so jazzed to help him out#akiyama really was ride or die for dude i remember bro was ready to bloody his hands for him innnnnnn 4?? p sure it was 4 or 5#esp since akiyama got to act as an uncle figure for haruka i just know he saw himself as someone close to kiryu SO FOR KIRYU TO#QUITE LITERALLY GHOST HIM and had no intentions to even tell him ever.... dawg bye#date deserved that slug too EJLRKE SORRY BUT you tell EVERYONE ELSE kiryus fine but not homeboy#well. fine's a bit relative innit. cancer and all but point is#a postcard wouldve been nice... im gonna throw up thinking about it i gotta watch that scene again
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