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spidercatweb · 2 days ago

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Post-case Bedtime Story ★ Spencer Reid x reader

first fic!! im so scared! but i really like this so i hope other people do too :)

Warnings: none! this is fluff, gn!bau!reader, no y/n, second person pov, in my mind Spencer and reader are already dating in this, i imagined s2 glasses reid while writing, verb tense probably switches but idc, i also wrote most of this while half asleep so...

Word Count: 704

Description: Reader is sleepy on the jet after a case and has a cute little moment with Spencer :)

Likes, comments, and reblogs are very much appreciated! 💜

The past week had been long, tiring, and incredibly stressful. For everyone on the team. You would think that after five restless days of tracking down an unsub, the others would want the same thing as you, some peace and quiet, and sleep. Lots of sleep. But apparently not everyone had the same idea.

As the jet peacefully glided through the quiet night sky, Emily, Derek, and JJ sat in the seats around the small table. Not so quietly discussing their plans to go out for drinks when they got back. Surely, Garcia would want to go as well, she would enjoy her friends being back after so long and would most likely try to convince the rest of the team to tag along as well.

Hotch and Rossi sat in the back corner, Hotch tiredly flipped through the case file, determined to finish his paperwork before the jet landed so he could assure as much time spent with Jack as possible before the team was called out again. Rossi silently sipped some whiskey while doing crossword puzzles in a book he carried around in his go bag.

Spencer was sat on the small couch, sitting with one leg crossed over the other and a book in his lap, his messenger bag on the floor infront of him. You were sat beside him, shoulder to shoulder, sitting cross legged with your feet up on the couch. You lightly rested your head on his shoulder, angling yourself so that you could at least try to read his book along with him, even though he was flipping the pages too fast for anyone to keep up with. You weren't sure, but you think he may have started to slow down his page flipping just a little bit when he noticed you trying to keep up with his reading pace.

After a while, Prentiss and JJ had both fallen asleep, while Morgan was listening to music with his headphones, staring out the jet window. Hotch had finished the paperwork (or given up on it, you werent too sure) and was "just resting his eyes", Rossi was passed out with his arms folded over his chest, empty whiskey glass on the table beside him.

You felt comfortable. You cozied up to Spencer a tiny bit more now that most of the team was distracted enough not to notice. Putting the full weight of your head on his shoulder and loosely locking an arm with the one of his that was closest to you.

He still flipped the pages of his book every few seconds, though he neared the end. He looked down and scanned your tired expression, your eyes were half closed but a faint smile could still be seen. You liked being close to him like this. The corners of his mouth slightly curve upwards as he looks at you. "You know you're allowed to sleep, right?" he whispers. "Mm, I was waiting for you to finish your book so we could talk." you reply, looking up at him. "Oh, you could've just interrupted me, I wouldn't have minded. What did you want to talk about?" He replies, feeling a little guilty that he was the reason you hadn't gone to sleep yet.

"Nothing specific, I just like talking to you." You smile at him. "And we've only talked about the case for the past few days, I want to talk about something not so gross and scary." Spencer huffs out a small laugh and returns your sweet smile. "Well, you do look pretty tired. I could read to you if you'd like? I wouldn't mind if you just so happened to fall asleep." he suggests, gently nudging you with his elbow. "That would be nice, actually." You reply, nodding while still leaning on his shoulder.

For the next five minutes, Spencer quietly reads to you from his book, picking up where he left off while reading to himself. His voice served as a reminder that he was still there, even if your eyes were closed. Another five minutes pass and you're fast asleep, leaning against him, his arm locked with yours. He continues reading though, hoping that his voice keeps you in a calm, restful sleep.

thank you for reading! <3

please let me know if you enjoyed!

#criminal minds #criminal minds fanfic #spencer reid #spencer reid x reader #spencer reid fanfic #spencer reid fluff #spencer reid x gn!reader #catnipp writes

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cobaltfluff · 4 months ago

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a few more heartsteel crossover doodles.. this time of the Oh They're Boyfriends variety :3c

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moeblob · 10 months ago

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I am really tired of a situation rn.

#fe three houses #felix hugo fraldarius #me using felix on my angy days because he is my angersona? you bet!#anyway if you want to try to get someones money or something bc you hurt your own car banging into mine #can you try to be a bit more timely with it buddy come on you hit me on feb29 !#why am i getting your insurance company calling me today !#also i would like to point out i didnt do it and neither of us were hurt and i filed a claim with my own insurance comp #and also filed a police report bc he didnt even suggest calling the cops to the scene #so like yeah hey man maybe you and your insurance company can move a lil faster or smth #literally everything that happened the day of is - according to my dad - an intimidation tactic #i look like im 15 and he probably thinks he can take advantage of a new driver but ya know! tough luck!#im just really tired and stressed over multiple things not negative so getting this on top of it was like #bro .................... anyway my phone didnt pick up for some reason so i called back and then nothing got resolved #cause the person who actually called me wasnt around to connect the line to from the guy who answered #idk man just its a lot despite my v minimal energy #got a job interview on monday tho ! and then also next week is an eye exam #and you might be thinking isnt that a good thing to get your eyes checked? you are correct but i am horrified #there are two body parts that give me absolute anxiety and eyes are one of them #and i know my eye sight is declining and im just v anxious #its fine im going to be fine i just have to be anxious about it

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poorly-drawn-mdzs · 2 years ago

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For your consideration.

(Reminder to vote in the poll)

#poorly drawn mdzs #mdzs #ouyang zizhen #red vs green saga #Well not quite yet. There are a few more days in the poll to go.#I have no true way of knowing who's winning unless it's over so I'm wishing both the best of luck #In my head Red was Ouyang and Green was Zizhen. But only one can be Ouyang Zizhen. Does this make sense #I wanted to do a bigger and sillier thing for the 4th month anniversary but I am just a bit to tired this week #Still gonna do it but maybe for next week or post-pone for next month #unofficially the red vs green boy sacrifice poll is now my legacy for the 4th month blog anniversary #I love them equally so this is balanced propoganda #I hope we all enjoy the next handful of comic where they get to co-exist </3 #trying out something with my art here re:texturing but it does *not* scan well so Im mixed on the results

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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months ago

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...

#ugh. fuck me im so tired. im getting sucked back into that workaholic mindset and now my body hurts and my nerves are fying. but it feels #good to b productive. if only i didnt have to teach and could just work with data :-(#anyway. the last 2 weeks have been good in that i feel like im actually hitting my stride a bit #bc we're seeing cool things in our genomes and its gonna b really fun to explore. and i met with the terrifying #prof who is on my committee to pitch a project for a final in her class and it seems it went over well. it was kinda funny bc we were #meeting and she was like: so how would u tell which gene was lost 1st? the phytochrome or the genes that r triggered by activation? and i #was like: uhhhhh idk. and then my advisor walked by and she grabbed him and asked him the same question and he was like: idk we'll have to #figure it out. which made me feel way better abt not knowing lol. then my superior lab mate asked me a question abt taking confocal images #and i was actually able to figure out what her issue was. and my old advisor was asking me if i knew anyone to ask for using a pam on cyanos #and i was like: here is what i think my advisor would say and linked her a paper. then i asked my advisor and he said what i expected and #linked the paper that id already sent. so im like. ok. ok. maybe i actually sometimes do kno what im doing. sorta.#and then my old advisor said she was so proud of me. and i was like aw. its so funny bc my relationship is so different with my new advisor #hes great but its all very professional. with my old advisor i would text her after hours bc she was a workaholic like me and went on long #car rides and handed out Halloween candy with her. she was more hands on and doesnt have kids so work is her life. its just interesting #so things have been going well. but there arent enough hours in the day. and my committee meeting is in like 16 days. and i am afraid for #that but not as afraid as i was in april when i had a full on breakdown and canceled it the day before it was set to happen lol #itll b fine. i just have to work thru the weekend so i can get my preproposal done. and prey that the fucking splitstree download site will #start working bc i want to do gene networks dammit #unrelated

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phagodyke · 3 months ago

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the masculine urge to take a saucepan off thr draining board and bash myself repeatedly over the head with it until I pass out and no longer have to experience feeling Bad 😍

#struggling to tolerate this one ngl its fucking dire this weekend. i just cant do this man #thr things i would fucking do for attention please. just one person to notice and care in the slighest i feel like im losing my fucking #mind out here how does every single person who has ever mattered to me in my lifr see me in distress and choose to ignore it or maybe they #dont even recognise im ij distress in the first place i dont know whats worse i dont think i hide it well at all im just so done #listen like ultimately its fucking fine. i will get myself through it like ive gotten myself through everything else in my fuckijg life #i dont even feel bad that often these days im doing so so so much better and its so much more tolerable to only have to deal with this #once or twice a week instead of it being a struggle every single day like i dont think i could go back to feeling like that again ever i #dont know how i managed to get througyh it before jesus fucking christ. but i can deal with it i can deal with this #ik ill feel fine tomorrow. its just thr fact im so desperately fucking alone with it that makes it so much worse than it has to be #i fucking hate repression i hate being so incapable of expressing myself that its easier for me to injure myself than it is to talk about #how i feel to anyone i hate being trapped in this stupif fucking torture labyrinth and not knowing how to get out of it and never being #given a single avenue anything to hold onto i hate having to do it alone every single fucking time and when i do try i just freeze out #entirely i cant form a coherent thought my brain enters total fucking shutdown pure static white noise fuzz and i dont know why please #its so unfair i dont think its that much to want a little comfort. just once just for someone to stay with me while i cry it doesnt have #to be more than that i just dont want to be alone like this i just want to feel safe around someone just close to someone just once #and well ill survive without it bc i always have i guess. so far at least. and there are many things im grateful for and i do in general #feel pretty okay my life is pretty good at times even. i feel so pathetic and stupid and ashamed for even feeling like this #but do i have to go my entire life without ever experiencing any kind of real intimacy with another person emotionally that is #i mean physical is nice too and they go hand in hand in some ways but i just want to feel seen and safe over anything.im tired #i feel like i try.but not hard enough i know its all my fault really but i dont know how to try any harder but nothing will ever change if #i dont i cant expect anyone to do anything if i cant rven communicate in thr first place. oh i dont want to think about it anymore #i have a headache from crhing and its not even 8pm ugh. okay. well it is what it is.#ill breathe until i calm down and then tidy up whatever i left in the kitchen and get my work stuff ready for tmr #and polish my boots maybe. and read and go to bed at 9:30 i think. and ill feel fine in the morning #my fault for thinking about it earlier i know i shouldve nipped it earlier on its such an easy spiral to fall into i need to get better #it happens. okay anyway. no cause for concern im good guys. weakly thumbs up at the camera all covered in blood #my period is late actually thats probably all this is lmao. makes sense thinking abt it #cant wait for it to finally start and all earthly desire to leave my body so i never experience pain again amen #.vent #ignore this sorry for being mentally ill im not even that mentally ill anymore so no excuse rly ummmm. bit embarrassing innit.

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rapidhighway · 5 months ago

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also picking raspberries turned out to be.. really fucking hard

#it's so physically demanding broo ToT #idk i feel like im just weak af because some people there seem to do it so easily and i can barely #do half a day #and they want me to do a full day tomorrow bro #like #I'm so tired after half a day..#i genuinely feel like i might just collapse or something #i do want that bit of money tho but it's sooo exhausting #i went there for half a day today and it killed me bro i was just lying in bed #and i didn't want to fall asleep cause it was like noon already but #i didn't even have the energy to look at a phone lmao #well it's gonna be over this week probably cause #the raspberries are going to stop growing in a few days apparently they're saying in 2 days #we're going to be done #I'd love to make more money but I don't think i can fucking do ittt #its so physically demanding whyyyyy #and why are there grandmas working with me in that field and they seem just fine BROOOO TOT #but yeah now that im thinking about it this also might be part of my problems cause #im soo much.ore irritable rn just cause im literally exhausted all the time ughhh #i came back home 3 days ago and i haven't even had the time to sit down at a desk and draw something #not even mentioning energy aughhh

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altruistic-meme · 2 months ago

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just applied for a part time job 😔 ough if im being honest

#do i WANT to work 2 jobs? not at all!#however i DO want to build my funds up some and thus i must #especially considering. Everything.#and with how wishywashy my job has been this year having a 1. fallback job that i already have in case i DO end up being laid off #2. have an active income in case we have MORE weeks off (which i already know we will in december)#and 3. just have a little more money in case of emergencies and so i can have a bit of spending money #so really aside from i know it'll make me Tired it's a good idea :(#especially with trying to run a fandom event OUGH #but that's only of i GET the job and im only applying for the one bc its at the craft store i worked at before #so i already KNOW how to do most of it it'll just be about refreshing and relearning and learning the few new stuff i know is there #anyway. widh me luck.#i DID saybi am currently employed and that i don't have open availability which ik is :/ when job hunting #cus computers will automatically throw out your application #and also i gave myself time on the end of my Big Job shoft to go home and shower before i would be willing to be at the Small Job #so we'll see if i even get an interview or anything lmaooo #shh ac

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 year ago

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I have found a beautiful perfect humble rock specimen that is light yellow with a weird dark yellowy brown lining, somewhat resembling a chunk of smoked gouda cheese... effervescent

#I am still very into trash collecting at the moment and even went out and got one of those grabby sticks for cheap and a little #bucket I can carry around and put trash in. so I am going on walks in nature a bit more (not really to enjoy nature but more to play the #very fun Real Life Hidden Object Point And Click Game that is 'hunt for bottle caps and cans' .. but eh.. whatever gets me out of the #house lol).. anyway.. some nature places near water will have cool rocks #Which I know you're not supposed to take them and I MOSTLY dont.. but every once in a while it's like... when else will I ever find a #gouda rock... I have cleaned up 4 buckets of trash today.. I have helped the environment.. mayhaps.. i could take a One Single Rocke as a #treate... ANYWAY. but yeah. I don't know the names of rocks but there's a rock that's a matte muted marigold yellow sort of #color and I call them 'cheese rock'. I'm pretty sure this one is of the 'cheese rock' species but it just has weird brown coloration #like maybe it got stained or something on one side of it. Most of the other cheese rocks have no markings. though sometimes there will be a #auburn reddish sort of hue on a corner or something.. hrmm.. curious. I also got a Beginner's Hobby rock tumbler and some supplies #so I might try polishing some of the rocks from my enormous rock collection. even though they're all street rocks I picked up from sidewalk #and stuff. I saw a video where someone put random gravel and stuff in a rock tumbler and none of them were Stunning Gems or whatver #but some still turned out cool enough that I would be pleased with the result... OUgh.. I want to post more I need to like do costumes and #sculptures and stuff and be Active On Social Media and think about my Future and Career and how it always benefits artists to keep an #active social media or etc. but I just feel so tired and bad lately. I think the summer heat waves have really exhausted me. I also have #been trying to make new friends + on a weird schedule so I've been socializing and also watching media too much. I notice I always start #to feel this kind of unsettled stress of not making any forward progress in my life if I do that for too long. like 'Okay this week I've #done nothing but meet up with two friends & watch like 10 episodes of tv and only worked on a few projects on the side.. this is HORRIBLE!'#(ppl who follow me here that I talk to on discord: this isn't about you! Im specifically just referencing being tired of introductory talks #with a new round of random strangers during my Friend Hunt. Just clarifying so it couldn't be misinterpreted as vaguepost implying that I'm #secretly bothered by talking to you or etc. lol.. anyway) . Which I know to MOST people 'I talked to a lot of friends and watched some cool #stuff!' sounds like a GOOD relaxing time but.. to me it is not ghhj.. Those are 'external' focuses on things outside myself which bothers #me if not moderated. Like.. i MUST retreat internally to work on my worldbuilding and my own thoughts and etc. at very regular intervals or #it will really start to bear on me too much. Brain Mandated Hermit Isolation lol. Just being too detached from my world and stuff for #too long feels increasingly bad. PLUS. every day I don't make tangible progress towards my goals is a day wasted that I could have been #investing in my future by working on novels/games/sculptures/actual career relevant stuff. Not even in a Capitalism way i just genuinely #enjoy Completing Tasks & feel miserable if I don't for too long. EVEN the media I'm watching I turn into A Task since I rank in a detailed #google doc list after viewing lol.. Like EW movie too boring on it's own. NEED to turn it into something I can categorize and analyze ghghj #LOVE to make things more complicated than they need to be. like YAAAY organizational tasks! yaay meticulous sorting!! BOO ''mindless fun''!

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apocalypticdemon · 5 months ago

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I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.

#to be fair it's bc school starts again in a few weeks #but idk. every day at this office feels like sandpaper on my skin. people always ask me shit i dont understand #and every case is so individual there's no set checklist to follow to troubleshoot #so most of the time I just grind my gears and get stuck #it'd busy more days than not.#and it was advertised to me as data entry only. client interactions was not what i signed up for.#it's all client interaction.#we're short staffed so nobody gets to take the back office and have a break.#when we weren't short staffed i was the new guy and only got 1 day in the back a week while everyone else got 2.#all my coworkers are conservative but talk like they're apolitical.#i thought it'd be fulfilling bc im helping people get benefits #but many are rude or impatient as any other service job. I'm constantly trying to direct people that don't want to listen #or explain the intricacies of something i barely understand.#and i don't want to lead people astray bc you have to start over if you blow a deadline.#but there's just nothing redeeming that i enjoy.#i hate customer service. i hate constantly asking questions. i like seldom few of my coworkers.#i can't be me at work.#and i don't care about the work itself anymore.#this job made me cry every day for weeks last month from sheer stress and overstimulation.#i almost cried myself sick several times.#the only reason I'm not there anymore is bc i dont fucking care anymore.#it took me 2 months to burn out. 2 months!#i was training for half of that!!#idk. everyone decided i was smart and could pick it up quickly so. even though everyone else got 4-6 weeks of shadowing #you can make do with 3 before you start doing stuff solo.#which feels unfair. i wasn't ready for it. and i resent the decision quite a bit.#plus it's been a nightmare for me in terms of external stressors and my generally deteriorating mental health. so.#all in all. i hate it here.#and i can't wait to turn in my notice so i can gtfo in 2 weeks #i am so tired. free me. let me go back to my music please

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dinopant · 3 months ago

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Ughhh I keep remembering the fucked up dream I had that hurt my feelings the other night...

#dream about person i like that i gave up on because they got with someone else #just straight up looking me in the eyes and telling me how they knew i liked them #and they liked me but only when i was younger and prettier and more useful #and how they loat attraction to me and im never going to be good enough for anyone #they would never say thsi irl #but it hit me so personally in my dream #idk why my mind came after my insecurities so hard #but idk #feelimg a bit bummed this week #kinda feelin and thinkin #idk #maybe i give up #im tired of getting my feefees hurt #because the only ppl i like are great and make amazing frieultibut ultimately end up in fufilling great relationships with other ppl #i hardly catch feelimgs for ppl anyore at this point #i dont think i could ever be my person with anyone else #and when i do make that bond #it doesnt work out because its just me getting stupid infatuated #i give up #blah blah blah your only 25 and ppl will want you blah blah blah #no they dont #they wont #i give up!!#im tired+!#its not worth it iv accept that its not gonna happen for me #and im too shy to do anything casual either #so im just gonna be on my own and be miserable #its fine #im too needy and i need to work on it #i need to need and want ppl less

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outfoxt · 9 days ago

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well lads I've done it again 🫡 I've started and finished a 300 page percy jackson book in the same day once more

#one of the less academically challenging books but still #if i can wake up in time to make it to temple with my mom and brother tomorrow #I want to start reading the power #then after that hopefully ill read the new sunbearer trials book #and then after that #oh i guess i still have freakslaw left #honestly that's the book im least interested in #even though i got it for my birthday #i didnt ask for it so ig i shouldn't feel bad #and then ofc the textbook #and i still have so much i want to dooooo #ive spent 2 weeks doing fuck all and i still feel so tired #hopefully more reading and going out will help me feel a bit better

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alxor-of-hellsite · 13 days ago

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THINGS!

2025 is going to be the most jam packed stressful year of my life & i know that for sure because a lot is already planned. So i WILL be an absolute mental wreck (this is apologies in advance) & i will literally be clinging onto support most likely the whole year so tumblr will either be me spamming constantly or me not here for weeks or months at a time & barely posting? i’m so unpredictable. Anyways my entire life is guaranteed to change & the best case scenario will still ruin a lot of shit for me so if i get really depressed THERE IS REASON!!!! & i’ve already made several promises so the world is stuck with me if i can help it. so uuhhhhhhhhh YEAH. ANYWAYS IM SCARED FUCKING SHITLESS LIKE ZERO SHIT SCARED OUT KF MY FUCKING MIND SO YEAH. THE MENTAL STATE WONT BE THE BEST. LOVE YOU GUYS!!! IF MY ACTIVITY IS SPOTTY IM NOT DEAD WE’RE PROBABLY JUST DISSOCIATED AS SHIT!

Anyways. TLDR i’m going to be super fucking stressed out & out of pocket for the next year because of shit.

Any friends of ours read tags pretty please <3

#new year 2025 #going to be super hyperactive or stare at a wall for a week & i don’t know which one it will be yet it’s leaning towards stare at a wall #for maybe like a month. just stare at wall & cry #BUDDY REN IS NOT OKAY! BUT HANGING IN THERE!#WE COMMITTED TO HARD TO THE BIT THAT IS LIFE SO YALL ARE STUCK WITH ME LESS SUN DONT SHINE RIVERS TAKE ME DOWN!#mighhhhhht end up relapsing on the addiction but that is way better than being dead. it doesn’t have to be healthy at this point #as long as it keeps me alive & sane i guess? i’ll obviously try not to but like dark times are dark #life update #IF YOU ARE AN IRL THAT I TALK TO OFTEN & YOU NOTICE ME NOT RESPONDING TO ANYTHING OR REACHING OUT PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD REACH OUT #IM SAYING THIS NOW BECAUSE IVE BEEN INCREDIBLY SUICIDAL BEFORE & AM BEING CAUTIOUS AS HELL!!!! MENTAL STATE IS NOT A FUCKING GAME OVER HERE #LIKE IF I START SHOWING SIGNS & I AM NOT TAKING CARE OF IT ALREADY REN IS A STUBBORN BITCH & WILL REFUSE HELP BUT IM NOT PLAYING #IF SHIT STARTS GETTING CONCERNING FOR THE LOVE OF GOD PLEASE INTERVENE #LIKE OBVIOUSLY IF YOU ARENT DOING GOOD EITHER & NEED PRIORITIZE YOURSELF DO THAT!!!#BUT IF YOU ARE IN A POSITION TO HELP & CATCH ON TO ANY CONCERNING SIGNS PLEASSSSSSE DONT LET THIS BITCH TURN HELP DOWN & INTERVENE #WE WILL PROBABLY NEED ALL THE HELP WE CAN GET & ALL THE SUPPORT WE CAN ASWELL #BUT ALSO TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF PLEASEEEE? DONT IGNORE YOUR OWN NEEDS #APOLOGIES IF THIS IS WORDED BAD IM NOT THE BEST WRITER THATS NOT MY JOB #SERIOUSLY LOVE YOU GUYS & IM GOING TO TRY MY HARDEST TO SUPPORT MYSELF BUT WE MIGHT NEED MORE HELP THAN WE CAN GIVE OURSELVES ALONE?#IF ANY OF THIS SHIT MAKES SENSE #MIGHT NOT? I DUNNO DM ME IF YOU WANT TO BATTLE PLAN WITH ME #THE BATTLE BEING LIFE WHILE CHANGING LITERALLY EVERYTHING & MAYBE BEING AN INTERNALLY DISPLACED REFUGEE IN THE COMING MONTHS #I LOVE YALL! UH THANKS FOR READING I GUESS? IM TIRED & GONNA SLEEP NOW #GOOD NIGHT YALL <3

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orcelito · 3 months ago

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Oh yeah, I forgot to mention it here hfkshfks

So when I was tuning the violins today. Well it was the first time I'd done anything with them in a while. And tbh I should've loosened the strings before leaving them for so long, but I hadn't thought of it.

So I tuned up my main violin. It's always been easy to tune & keeps in tune near perfectly when it's played regularly. So it went by quickly, except... when I'm tuning, I like to check the harmonic notes when cross-checking strings, and for whatever reason, the G string's harmonic was like half a note flat. The string itself was in tune tho, which was weird. So I went to adjust the bridge a little bit, just in case that might help, and then the G string fucking SNAPPED!!!

RIP lmao

Good for me tho I've always kept spares in my case. I had 2 of each string, so I just went and put in the new one. First time stringing a violin in years and years, but it went perfectly fine!!

Back and better than ever!

Then I went to tune my electric violin, and it took me literally 10 minutes bc the pegs DID NOT want to turn. I had to literally grab a blanket to pad my fingers as I put my whole self into that shit. It hurt !!!!! But I got it eventually lol. My main violin is definitely the best one for playing out of the bunch.

#speculation nation #i played my electric violin more than i ever have today.#didnt actually play my main violin like i first intended. bc it was getting late and i felt. bad.#so i played the electric violin. it worked! but i find myself missing my darling #i should try to practice at least a few more times before next semester. to make sure im prepared for returning to orchestra #(which isnt THAT an exciting prospect. take THAT my reoccurring dreams born from orchestra longing)#i actually picked it back up surprisingly well. outside of the um. stiff wrist and finger pains.#my wrist will loosen back up in time. thats the main reason i want to practice some more b4 next semester.#that plus my finger endurance. i still have pretty great dexterity. like it just felt really natural.#but my fingers got tired quicker than they used to and the SKIN. my CALLOUSES. are NOT THERE.#gonna wait until my fingers r recovered before i try taking my violin out again tho #also my wrist is a lil sore. i was demanding a lot from it today too.#not as flexible as it is when im actively playing but i actually managed to overcome it fine.#did my shifting and whatever. vibrato. whatever. really the worst part of the wrist stiffness is the finger positioning.#instead of being straight down on the strings my fingers had a bit of a turn to them #so the sides of the tips are sore now. owie. but oh well i made it work.#certainly wasnt my best playing but i did the best i could considering the circumstances.#in retrospect picking violin back up after Years and practicing and (re)learning a whole song to audition that SAME DAY is kind of insane.#whyd i do this to myself. oh yeah cause im stupid. oh well at least im following my heart.#i hope i hear back from the orchestra professor before too long. now that ive done the rehearsal im like. oughhh. yknow?#we will hope that friday night was good enough to count as 'by the end of the week'. we will hope.

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dandyshucks · 1 year ago

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everyone pray for me that i did not just give myself food poisoning (;･∀･)

#i may have made a bad decision with the meat i cooked shdjdkl BUT I THINK IT'LL BE FINE #it was past the date on the packaging but it didnt smell or look or feel off at all so . i decided to risk it #and now im panicking bc i think perhaps that was actually rly stupid fhdkdl #but it was. so much money. i had no idea the date was so soon on the package when i got it from mum #I would've frozen it if I'd known dhdksl i should've looked #alas !!! i think it'll be fine tbh bc it genuinely did not seem spoiled at all so ... now we just pray #i had a fairly small serving of it and I'll see how i feel to figure out if the rest of it is safe to eat or not #im just fhdjdkl crying a little rn bc the past two days have been so awful and im so tired #i rly dont want to get sick on top of everything else going on #i would like one thing to go well fjdkdl just like. one thing. this feels like divine punishment for having the old lady group go so well #im just kind of losing my mind rn i think actually fhfkdl i have a therapy/counseling appt on monday though so we'll see if that helps #i do not have high hopes fjfkdl #MANNNN. can the universe give me a break PLEASE. I've been trying so hard the past three weeks to do well 😭😭#im putting in so much work and effort fhdksl can i PLEASE have this one thing go okay djdksl i do not want to get sick !!!#if i do get sick then im just. hhhhh. idk djdkdl it's just one more thing to add to my pile of Bad ig djdkdl what can ya do djdkdl #i am going to pull myself together and stop crying and go play stardew maybe idk fjdkdl i feel like im starting to crack a little bit #augh. augh. i would love to catch a break djdkdl #dandy.cmd #vent //

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catfishofoldin99colours · 4 months ago

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mmmmrrrrggghhhhhhh slow day

#catfish speaks #i did not get nearly half the things i wanted to accomplish done #part of it is cos i need more fabric for the bottom half of this coat #and that's not a hard find but it does mean i have to wait until nexy week when i get paid to buy it #and so i couldn't do rhe bottom but tbh the top half has SO much to it #and then i just. took forever to get anything done #also got groceries today which probably didn't help #but fuck i did not accomplish very much #and im scared im going to be crunching #i haven't even gotten halfway on the owlbear #and in my head i can whiz through all the steps and figure it out easily but oh boy #actually doing it is. different #i am just. very tired #god i want to get these cosplays done so badly #and ideally not have to crunch too hard #hrghhhh we will see #have a cup of tea and rest #then get back to what i can do today #and hey i have a lot of sick leave. i could. take a day off to jusy try and catch up #we'll see.#the good thing is thay i do currently have the leave to go to pax and will be able to get more from here on #so im good there #it's organised its just a bit tight #and of course im very tired this week and have a million things on so naturally i agree to go to a party on friday #im excited but aurhjisjajai man i love cramming my schedule don't i #reminds me i need to finish that present

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