#this was mostly a tiktok thing from people outside of the community

[neonswitchhouse]

Pop Culture Witchcraft and the Importance of Being Cringe

Cringe has become a bit a loaded word nowadays, being at first a word to describe feelings of second-hand embarrassment, arguably from failings to impress others or to raise one's social capital. Think for example failed motorsports stunts, falling into pools with a tray full of fruity drinks or even worse; someone trying to impress a crush by molding themselves into someone they only think the other party would like via baseless assumptions. Your body recoils, seeing a dirt biker tumble down the course. Your stomach sinks, watching someone plunge into the shallow end of the water. You squirm watching someone try to convince their crush to go out with the facade they made. That I would describe as "empathetic cringe"; a reaction based on witnessing something you do not wish upon yourself like physical harm or embarrassment.

The modern definition of cringe however, is a different beast entirely.

Using the Urban Dictionary meaning as defined by user Screech McGee, "Before the internet trolls changed the meaning of this word, "cringe" was a verb used to express embarrassment or disgust. Now, this word is mostly used to define something that you dislike or do not understand. Internet trolls use this word as an insult towards people in fandoms, with bad grammar, or both combined. Trolls also use this word to describe memes on some occasions."

Doing a quick search on YouTube or Tiktok for "cringe" gives you an array of oddities to the average eye; people dressed in rainbow-colored wolf fursuits, teens expressing their love and attachment for their favorite anime character, or perhaps someone outwardly displaying behaviors considered aneurotypical. They fall outside societal norms and standards of behavior. They aren't perceived as "normal or acceptable" to the standards set by white-cis-het-able bodied-neurotypical persons and communities.

But in it, the furries, the fandom-lovers, and even the "neurospicys" are harming none. They're doing what they want.

Sounds kinda familiar doesn't it?

Lets loop around to what you're probably reading this rant for; the witchy reasons.

Witchcraft as a practice, is already an outsider to most societies, especially to those predominated shaped by Protestant Christian beliefs. It's already something outside the norms. Even back during the hey-day of reality tv shows like Wife Swap, those who weren't considered Christian or followed more "earth-based" religions and lifestyles were presented as the butt of the joke. And while witchcraft and non-Christian beliefs as a whole have becoming more popular nowadays, it's still considered something outside the norm or in the minority of persons identifying themselves as witches and pagans voluntarily.

So we're already ticking one "cringe" box according to societal norms

Chaos Magic as a whole is based on using belief as a tool or as a fuel source to workings to enact change or bring it about to oneself or to the environment around them as a whole. Hence the whole "nothing is true, everything is permitted" thing in that there's no one strict set of rules to make something work.

Pop Culture Witchcraft and Pop Culture Paganism deriving from chaos magic, while with several theories as to how it works, the crux is in "belief", in energy fueled into something or even someone.

Going off the egregoric model, egregores are formed and fed by the energy (ie: belief) fueled into them. This is where fandom comes into play. Fandom is fueled by passion, by love, by admiration, by forming community around shared likes, interests, or even dislikes. Fandoms are funnels for that collective energy, passion, creativity, etc.

And to some, pouring in so much joy, passion, fervor, and creativity can be seen as something out of their grasp of understanding; something that they're the outsider to and not the main target audience of. It's "not made for them". Therefore it's deemed as "cringe" underneath that definition.

But why deprive oneself of joy just for the approval of others?

Why force oneself to conform to arbitrary rules and norms?

As long as your joys and passions affect only yourself and do not harm others directly, why shield it from view?

To get the most out of a pop culture practice, it's good to have it based on what you're passionate about; what you're well-versed in. What gives you that fuel or belief. What brings you joy and makes you want to pursue things even further.

So be cringe, be passionate, be able to go on a dang unprompted 20minute rant about the lore to your favorite failed RPG series. Be able to show a whole dang portfolio of your self-insert smooching your favorite character on the cheek. Be absolutely, unapologetically passionate about something and see what happens. See what happens when you drop the worries of how others perceive you.

So stay safe, have fun, be cringe, be free, stay spooky.

[lycanthropyreturned]

My experiences with alterhumanity and therianthropy, and why I'm here now.

I have always been nonhuman, and I have always known that. However as time goes on, so does my identity. When I was a child, I simply didn't discuss or worry about it. I knew who I was and that's all that mattered. In around 2014 I "awakened" into the therian and alterhuman community. Back then, the therian community was rather small, and focused on things such as aesthetics or care guides. Truly simpler times.

As I went through school, I distanced myself from the therian community, more focused on excelling in school and personal life struggles. When things finally died down I was left to have time to rediscover myself. I reentered the therian community around 2020, created a tiktok- and saw how much things had changed.

Therianthropy was now all about presentation, labels, quadrobics, views and likes. Now there's nothing wrong with that, every community evolves over time. My issue personally was the amount of misinformation. At first, I merely interacted with the surface of therianthropy and its social aspects, doing the occasional post, etc.

As my life and identity continued to evolve, I continued to delve into not just the therian community- but the alterhuman community as a whole. I strived to learn more about myself and my identities, and I wanted others to learn too. Back in 2022, I started spreading alterhuman and therian education. To this day, it's something I deeply enjoy doing. Nowadays, it's rare to find someone spreading education on the topic, especially accurate information. I wanted to be that person. However, I realized that in my pursuit to help and teach others, social media had overtaken my identity.

Therianthropy and alterhumanity is inherently rooted deep in nature. The identities themselves that so many people identify as are naturalistic. Even so, we find that the community is mostly online, and with that, comes drama and discourse.

For a term so broad in nature, it's astonishing how split the community can be. Drama, discourse, infighting, name-calling, shaming, and more is rampant. I began to realize that more and more as I became a semi-popular creator on tiktok. I was being pulled into the "trends" and not truly listening to my inner self.

Alterhumanity is best experienced offline. With your true self, and not for the self you put up for others. I believe that a lot of people need to hear that and learn from it. With an identity so rooted in nature, depriving oneself from it can be a pain.

And as I learned this, I distanced myself. I had a few run-ins with some nasty folks, and that taught me that I don't want to turn into that.

So I spent time to myself. Reevaluating my identity and what it really meant to me. I spent time offline and outside, with the people I love and doing the things I loved. And in this time I realized that I didn't need the approval of others on my identity. As long as I knew who I was, that's all that mattered to me.

After being offline in the therian and alterhuman community, I began to realize that if I did return, I could do it how I wanted to. Post whatever I wanted, when I wanted to, and not worry about other people.

I could be myself, and that's all that mattered. So now I'm here. While I still use the term therian for myself, I have changed and grown with it. I now use more broad terms for myself, and have begun to not worry about mirco-managing my identity. Some people find comfort in labels, and that is entirely valid! But some folks can find them restrictive as well, and that's also a valid opinion and experience.

That is one thing I value so much about therianthropy and alterhumanity. The terms are both so broad that you may not meet a single other nonhuman who has the same experience. I love and cherish the diversity of this community, and I think that people need to realize that a bit more.

So this blog here is for me. For me to journal about my experiences, to occasionally post education- whatever I want. I made this blog for myself, and that's how it most likely is going to stay. I hope you enjoy the future for this blog, and join me on this journey.

[showf4lls]

ʚ ― discord calls ; quackity

info! headcanons, fluff / gender neutral reader

cw! no CWs

request! quackity x brazilian streamer who is on the QSMP

dedication! @veenus777

⎼ obviously, he's the one that invited you to the QSMP so he had some idea of who you were, but seeing you on his server really piqued his interest in you as an individual. he just finds you so interesting

⎼ although portuguese is somewhat similar to spanish, it's different enough that he struggles to understand it. after trying super long to learn portuguese from random places on the internet to supplement the portuguese he's learning from other streamers on the QSMP, he caves and finally signs up for duolingo. (Q strikes me as the kind of person to completely hate on duolingo lol). he really wants to learn portuguese in order to better communicate with you

⎼ he saves it up though. he doesn't speak portuguese around you until he knows enough to speak a good few complete sentences, mostly just to surprise or impress you

⎼ if you want to be involved in lore, he finds a logical way to include you in his characters' lore and brainstorms for upcoming lore events with you

⎼ makes sure to watch over richas for you if you're too busy to

⎼ if you're not really into lore, he completely respects that. he still does his whole thing with lore, but he'll drop by to hang out with you every so often and just help you with whatever base game projects and stuff you have going on

⎼ likes to bring you little gifts on the SMP. you keep them in a backpack that you've dedicated to holding gifts Q has given you

⎼ he makes sure to put your timezone into the clock app on his phone so that he can make sure to keep from texting you or anything like that while you're asleep (or while you should be sleeping)

⎼ lots and lots of discord calls, sometimes when you're grinding on the SMP, and sometimes outside of that. you guys definitely are constantly sending each other tons of memes and tiktoks that you find funny

⎼ y'all make personalized playlists for each other. it's cute

⎼ there's lots of teasing to both of you guys from other server members, including the eggs. it's usually just too good of an opportunity for people to resist

⎼ you like to try your best to distract him during lore streams and such (it's funny okay)

⎼ whatever the case is, he tries his best not only to get on your good side, but also to get to know you as best he can despite the distance. he cares a lot about you, and he's not afraid of showing it (at least, in his own way)

[northern-passage]

I came across the character Branwen* in my most recent play-through and was curious if she's supposed to be Inuit or not? It was just a bit unclear since she has a chin-stripe tattoo, a Welsh name, and comes from Gael (which I'm under the impression is supposed to be Norse inspired?) Neither the Welsh/Celts or Norse had tattoos like these and the imagery of such comes from the appropriation of Inuit kakiniit. It's unfortunately common, especially in the fantasy genre, think Yasha from Critical Role, and I wouldn't really blame you for not yet knowing better. Misguided or not, it's very damaging since these tattoos are a closed practice, and Inuit have asked us not to use them for non-indigenous characters. Some other cultures have similar tattoos, but these are specifically what are appropriated from in the "Norse aesthetic".

This could be a great opportunity to represent a community that's regularly misrepresentationed and appropriated from in the genre, though! I don't believe you had any ill intentions, if this is a mistake you've made, since you've done really well about a lot of other things so far.

Also, I've done a lot of research on the topic for my own world building and I can try to help if you have any questions!

Here's a list of Inuk creators and artists from my own following (on TikTok specifically):

kadlun

willow.allen

notdayle

shinanova

And fairy.gothparent (not indigenous) has some really educational content on the subject also!

I'm sorry I've misread or misinterpreted anything, and I hope none of this came off as aggressive! I'm just genuinely curious and want to help others do better!

hi :-) no worries, you are not aggressive at all. Branwen is not meant to be Inuit, nor is she meant to be Welsh or Norse. Gael and Adrania are just Fantasy Lands with their own lore & culture-- but with that being said, i am fully aware that the setting for TNP is very much giving medieval Europe, hahahaha. regardless, when i choose names they are mainly just because i like them, so i wouldn't put too much stock in them when reading.

same thing when i designed Branwen, the tattoo was mostly for the aesthetic and because i liked it. i was aware of a few different types of indigenous tattoos (like the Māori tāmoko as well as the Inuit kakiniit) at the time i chose the thick, solid line because i was purposefully trying to avoid conflating it directly with those indigenous tattoos. you're the first person to point this out to me and i appreciate it and it has made me reevaluate my decision to give her such a distinct tattoo. i wanted tattoos to be a big part of Gaelish culture & planned for them to be made with heavy lines & geometry, but in the end a lot of the designs are all over the place (Merry's are way more modern due to basing some of the designs around nautical/sailor tattoos with only a few geometric designs, while Lea's are strictly geometric runes meant for their alchemy)

i absolutely want to avoid misrepresenting these tattoos, especially since it was never my intention for this character to be interpreted as a part of any of the mentioned indigenous groups. this is a good reminder for myself that my work does not exist in a vacuum and regardless of my intentions, the names i choose & the designs i make still reflect my own personal biases and have implications outside of my story.

i appreciate you messaging me and sharing resources. and i always want to encourage people to do so! especially because in my worldbuilding for Gael and Adrania i am pulling inspiration from a lot of different places and a lot of other fantasy media. i've always intended for Adrania to be a "melting pot," with a lot of different influences as in-game cultures converge around their ports & trade routes, but that can also lead to me unintentionally harming real world groups & cultures in my interpretations. as much as i want to "build from scratch" it's just not possible, i will always be influenced by the society i live in, hence me including the tattoo to begin with because you're right, i have seen similar designs in other fantasy media & just didn't think much about it.

going forward i'll most likely just remove that tattoo from Branwen's design, and maybe give her a neck tattoo instead 🤔 just something different to distinguish it from those indigenous designs.

[sophieinwonderland]

An Anti-Endo's Message for Willogenic Systems. Spoiler: Every Word is Wrong!

Starting off with ableist accusations of delusions.

They also don't seem to understand that willogenic systems don't generally will themselves to develop DID.

Maybe they're thinking of transDID. 🤷‍♀️

Accusations of DID faking stretch back a long time. Long before people started paying attention to endogenic and willogenic systems. And there's no evidence the existence of willogenic or endogenic systems has increased this.

In the infamous fakeclaiming McLean Hospital video, the people he used as examples from TikTok were mostly diagnosed traumagenic systems. In the incredibly flawed papers on "imitated DID," many of the case studies claimed to have trauma.

Also, I have it on good authority from many, many traumagenic DID systems that yes, DID systems can create alters.

Oh, and this gets even worse when you delve into the comments!

Now, system isn't really a medical term, and definitely isn't strictly used for people with DID or OSDD.

See Internal Family Systems therapy, for instance.

And outside of that, it's been used in non-medical contexts by non-disordered systems for close to 30 years.

I covered this particular talking point more in my Syscourse Primer.

Aside from the general misinformation though, I also do want to draw attention to the general ableism of calling people you think are suffering from delusions "insane."

Something they double down on, while also saying willogenic systems need hospitalized.

And they double down even further, saying that forced hospitalization is necessary for people.

And I'll say that I don't completely disagree with this there being cases where it's necessary.

At least, I think there are some very, VERY extreme circumstances where people will need to be temporarily hospitalized, such as if they're an immediate danger to themselves or others. There may be no other choice. (Say, if someone has a delusion that they could fly and had plans to test it by jumping off of a roof to prove to people they could.)

Without any sort of immediate danger though, forced hospitalization is likely to do far more harm than good.

This should only be a LAST RESORT option

It's overused as it is. And guess what? The medical community doesn't just lock up anyone who has any sort of delusion!

Not all delusions are harmful! Or, at least, not all delusions put someone at an immediate risk of causing harm to themselves or others.

And this is without touching on how "believing in something I don't like" isn't even a delusion.

At worst, the unfalsifiability of the claim puts this in the same realm as religion. You could just as easily apply this same logic to suggest anyone who feels the presence of God when they pray is delusional.

Part of the reason this is sticky is... who determines who is of sound mind? What gives them the right to strip away an innocent person's rights?

Because like it or not, forced medical confinement is imprisonment without trial, when no laws have been broken. Even if there are extreme cases where this may be necessary, the standard for this needs to be a lot higher than it is now.

And notably, they're suggesting we need a lower standard where anyone with any sort of delusion, or anything they deem to be a delusion, should be forced into confinement.

That is completely unacceptable.

What's even more confusing though is that they seem to suggest in another comment that the thing that makes people "insane" is using the word "willogenic" instead of "tulpa."

So it's not even wanting to lock people up for the belief they have people in their head...

But for calling them a word the OP doesn't want them to?

Imagine calling for people to have their rights stripped away and be forcefully confined because of disagreements over how a word is used!

...

And maybe this is getting nitpicky now...

But no they didn't...

They later showed a picture of this, where a willogenic anon asked how to BUY headmates. But they did not mention selling any.

The actual owner of that account, as far as I know, didn't identify as willogenic.

Oh, and they also posted another image as "proof" of this which didn't mention buying or selling headmates.

Oh, wait! That one is mine!

@artistry-andfandom

What was this screenshot even supposed to prove? Why did you use my post as an example of buying and selling headmates???

[quiet-admirer]

This is just a ramble so I'm not composing my thoughts in any way, and this is my perception from only being in limited online circles, but it feels like the past year or 2 was like feedism and fat fetishes got a little wave of normie exposure and people shitting on it with the usual first-argument-that-pops-into-your-mind societal regurgitated bullshit (on tiktok for example from what I hear anecdotally), but then that was coming up right as there was this growing wave of 'can we stop with the no kink at pride discourse'//'stop being puritan cops'//'there are no thought crimes' and I think those two waves coinciding has kind of combined into a weird thing where I've been seeing a ton of neutral and positive references to feedism by non-feedist online accounts/people in the past few months alone.

Like that burger kink post that has 17k notes last I saw it?? Regardless of whether that op has a feedism kink, their blog isn't a feedist blog, and I impulsively went to look in the notes and all of it is like 'lol I thought that said feudalism not feederism' and not 'umm you can't joke about feederism it's problematic' which is SO WILD to me. 17k people are willing to see a funny pun about feedism where it is not the butt of the joke and it's not at the expense of feedists and laugh along without needing to turn it into hysterical discourse like it's just a normal kink we can make puns and laugh about, and it's so normalizing??

It's not even just been that post either, it's wild to me. I know I've been much more active in this kink community in the past 3-4 years, so my experience is limited but it has really seemed like there's been increasingly bigger waves/cycles of exposure -> backlash -> pushback for acceptance -> exposure

And of course there are the vocal naysayers but the fact that there even IS anyone else out there other than anti-fat fetishists and us? Idk it gives me hope. I know there will be more cycles of backlash but seeing very slowly that there are starting to be people outside our community that are willing to have our back or just be willing to be seen standing next to us in a manner of speaking is weirdly healing. Like, I love being weird and I don't really like the idea of feedism being "mainstreamed" and am sceptical of feedism being "normalized" except for in other kink and queer communities, but there was NOTHING even close to this 12-15 years ago when I was first discovering my kink. It gives me hope that baby feedists will be more likely to stumble upon informative and positive ideas about themselves while they're figuring it all out

And that maybe we can move from being vocally and universally stigmatized from the few who've even heard of us to maybe being perceived like furries have been in recent years where it's started to mostly be like 'yeah they're weird but their art is kinda cool and they're just vibing'?

I don't know man, TL;DR I almost teared up about that burger kink post yesterday and I keep seeing posts everywhere about feedism that aren't filled with hateful comments and I'm just like what the Fuck is going on

[stupidstrawberrystars]

hi. so. I NEED MORE OF THAT TIKTOK AU

While I am writing this for me, to try and remind myself why I love writing, I also love that other people loved it too ❤️ I promised myself i wouldn’t answer this until I finished the next bit, so I have :) So thank you 😊

Wolfstar tiktok AU- Part Two (sorry if it’s unrealistic how often they go on “lives”. The next one will likely be them accidentally creating a couples trend).

Previous (Part One). Next (Part Three).

Oh and… this is 3k words. So i’m thinking of putting it on ao3. BUT ITS GOOD. I promise. Please read it (if it’s ur thing). They flirt embarrassingly and then Remus gets Sirius a super cute birthday gift!

Half their fan base are “Wolfstar” fans now. Thank James for sharing the ship name Marlene came up with a couple years ago. Luckily, Sirius is reassured that Remus has none and will not get any social media, due to his constant slander of it. So he’ll never find out about their fans.

But their platform is pretty great, it’s a community already and there’s almost no toxic people. Which is exactly why Sirius feels comfortable with this stream on his birthday. Him and James have been trying on skirts. 

They’re on the final ones now. Pete’s in the background ranking them. James has on a kind of ugly red skirt, it passes his feet and has weird frills all over it. But Sirius likes his skirt. The most actually. It’s a pleated, green mini(ish) skirt, the type that goes perfectly with his leather jacket and boots. 

He doesn’t have a super feminine build (except maybe his long hair- it’s all dumb stereotypes though) and he’s certainly not as thin as skirts are often designed for, so he was worried they wouldn’t suit or fit him. But James offered to do this, and he’s really enjoyed it. 

And now Sirius is tempted to wear it to the mini birthday celebration Marlene’s organised for him tonight. Only there’s a slight problem, it’s a little cold outside and none of his shirts go with the skirt.

“Padfoot, you literally own everything, how do you not have anything that goes?” James cannot even say that right now, he’s wearing a football top over the skirt. Football tops can go with skirts, but definitely not that skirt.  

“They do go. But it’s so cold and Marls planned a mostly outside thing. Usually i’d sacrifice my temperature for my style but it is my birthday. Shouldn’t I just get my perfect outfit?”

Pete warned him. He said that wearing the skirt outside wasn’t the best idea in November. But it hasn’t been too cold recently. Plus, it really looks good with his boots.

“Hey how about one of Moony’s jumpers you stole? They’re thin enough to fit under the jacket, would go with the skirt and would keep you warm. Plus you love them.” Sirius feels his cheeks warm a little. Trust Pete to simultaneously contribute a good idea and embarrass him. But regardless, he goes into his room and comes back out with two jumpers.

“I’ve only got red and orange? Neither go with green. I need like a- a brown one. So never mind.”

And as Sirius contemplates his outfit, the door opens.

“Sorry i’m late I had to pop back to my place to grab your gif-“ Sirius looks over when he hears Remus trail off.

“You alright Moons?” Remus is frozen in place, staring at Sirius like a deer in headlights. From their camera placement, the phone is recording only Sirius and James, with Pete popping up in the background. So Sirius steps out of frame to go towards Remus at the door. “Hey Moony.” James yells from behind him and it seems to snap Remus out of whatever caught his attention.

“Fuck, shit, sorry. Got erm- distracted. Hey, Happy Birthday Pads! I like- hah- the skirts. They suit you both. Well. I’ve got the drinks demanded by Marls and your gifts Padfoot.” It’s not even a compliment towards him and yet Sirius blushes.

“Yeah Remus is right, you’re really pulling of that long fucking red thing there James.” The compliment was probably just Remus trying to be nice. Petes right, James has pulled of many of the skirts so far but this is not the one.

“What the compliment, thanks Wormy.”

Full disclosure, they had to admit the background story of all their nicknames to the internet, lest their fans think they’re bullying Pete.

Sirius steps back into camera, with the whole living room behind him, placing the drinks to the side and grabbing his gifts. There’s two. A small box and a bigger, less obvious-shaped gift. 

“So everyone, I haven’t seen Moony alllll day since he had class and tests without stopping and he had to revise. But, worry not, he did text me Happy Birthday between each class cause he knows I want attention. So, how’d they go Moons?”

Sirius is inspecting the bigger gift, it’s an odd shape, and vaguely squishy, perhaps clothes, and when he looks back up at Remus, he’s got a little blush on his cheeks and his neck, and Sirius (not for the first time) wonders how far down his body it runs.

“Oh we don’t- it doesn’t matter... Oh okay stop glaring at me. All three tests went okay. I was really happy with my essay one though. So yeah, not so bad.”

“Congrats Moony, knew you’d kill it. Since we’re sharing news, I got to cover for the missing chef today, above all the other interns, so...” He’s told James and Sirius already. But there’s something about telling Remus news that matters more (at least to Sirius).

“Holy shit Pete that’s awesome. I knew they loved you. Good job. Hey, let’s see the cake you made. We’re so lucky to have a cook, I swear i’d starve to death without you.” Pete smiles at Remus’ compliment like he doesn’t say the same sort of thing every time Remus eats Pete’s food. And they live together, so that’s very often. Remus is just always so genuine.

Pete lifts the lid of the cake box to show Remus, and they fall into a little conversation in the kitchen, just to the edge of the screen of their live.

“You gonna open his gift now or later Pads?”

But Sirius isn’t even listening. He’s got an idea.

“Hey Moony come over here.” Remus walks towards Sirius with a doubtful look on his face. He clearly knows the tone Sirius takes when he wants something.

Sirius places the gifts on the table beside him, he’s desperate to know what they are but it’ll have to wait. 

“So... i’ve been trying to figure out what top can go with this skirt-“ There’s a joke about Remus topping him in there someone, and that’s obviously what James is thinking, “But nothing I own goes with it. I was going to wear one of your jumpers, but the ones i’ve got here are the wrong colour.”

Remus furrows his eyebrows and tilts his head as if to ask where this is going. It’s a bit far to go to Remus’ flat to steal his jumper. That’s not the plan though.

“And then in you walked, like the answer to my dreams,” Remus attempts to lean on the mini table behind him but it pushes backwards easily and he stumbles forward, sort of recovering. “And I realised the jumper you’re wearing right now matches absolutely perfectly with my skirt and my jacket.” Sirius takes a step towards Remus, and grabs onto the jumper ever so gently with his hand, and then looks a little up at Remus with what he hopes is a cute and not at all guilty smile.

“You-“ Remus chokes on his own words as he tries to speak, “You want the one i’m wearing righ- erm- right now?”

Sirius isn’t stupid, he knows Remus gets flustered sometimes when he’s a little flirty (Remus is gay, and Sirius is fucking hot, anyone with eyes would want to fuck him, so no James, it is not proof Remus loves him back). And he knows Remus never refuses anyone cause he’s so lovely. Especially not on their birthday.

“Come on Moons. It’s my birthday. Please.” Puppy dog eyes never fail. It’s funny actually, cause when anyone else sends Remus cute eyes in order to persuade him, like James, he usually just rolls his eyes and ignores them. But it always works when it’s Sirius.

Maybe he’s just really good at it. Pete always said Sirius was a dog in another life.

“Don’t you think I should wear the skirt? Or do I not actually look good?” For the record (he’ll be accused of this later by fans) he was not guilt tripping Remus. They both know he’s going to agree. Sirius just has to jump through a few hoops so Remus can feel like he has willpower. “Pads you- you look great.” Sirius raises an eyebrow. “You look hot okay. Really hot. But what- erm- what’ll I wear if you take my top?”

That was easy. And yes, he does look hot. Good of Remus to notice (James is shooting him the look, as he always does. It means “It’s reciprocated you idiot”. But Sirius still isn’t sure. That was just a compliment after all).

Sirius wraps one hand around Remus’ arm and keeps the other one buried in his jumper, and then tugs him. Remus trips over a little but follows behind.

“I’ll find you something.”

“Wait Padfoot- I just-“

“Oh come on,” Sirius spins back to meet Remus’ eyes, “You’re the one who said I should wear the skirt. You said I look hot. Hot enough to have earnt it?”

Remus coughs and turns red, again. He blushes so easily. But he tugs Sirius into his bedroom so they can trade.

That’s for sure a win.

And while they’re in there... let’s just say James makes plenty of innuendoes. And Pete laughs his head off.

“You are going to give me the jumper back... right Pads?” Remus walks out the room in his red jumper that Sirius stole a month ago, and Sirius in Remus’ brown jumper. To be fair, it does go with the skirt perfectly.

“Really Moony? It’s my birthday.”

“Yes and usually the rule is I pick you a gift, you don’t just steal one of my belongings. Which I have by the way, two actually. and you haven’t opened either.”

“I’ll give it back eventually Moony. But don’t I just look lovely in this? Or- do you not think I look lovely?”

Sirius reaches to where he left the gifts and picks them up. It’s got a card stuck to the front of the wrapping. He’s ignoring the slight insecurity in his voice. It’s never an easy thing to dress more feminine after being raised the way he was. But he loves fashion and makeup. And he believes it’s for everyone. So he won’t let his past prevent his future. 

“You look-“ Remus grabs Sirius’ arm and turns him so they’re facing each other. It throws off Sirius’ balance a little and now he’s definitely close enough for all the fan edits to take advantage of. Plus he’s in Remus’ jumper. And it smells so much like him. He really must’ve been a dog in another life. “You look absolutely gorgeous Pads”. 

He whispers it, like it’s a secret, and yet also like it’s the most obvious thing in the world. Trust Moony to recognise the slight worry in his voice and go to extra effort to reassure him.

“Th-Thanks Moons.” Sirius never used to believe books or tv when they claimed the world fell away when they locked eyes with their soulmate. Frankly he never even believed in soulmates. But if soulmates aren’t real, what the bloody hell is Remus Lupin? 

Because Sirius has never been more sure of anything in the world, than this. Than that he meets Remus in every universe and in every time and in every life and Remus ruins him. In a heartbreaking, life shattering, incredibly brilliant way. 

Because when he meets Remus’ eyes, time becomes a simple construct, a useless concept unnecessary to his thoughts. And other people become 2D, folded flat and barely visible. Sound falls away and all he can hear is Remus’ words and his gentle breathing. 

“Wanna open your gifts now Pads?” Remus’ hands are still ever so slightly on his hips, and his right hand has slipped just low enough that one of his fingers is resting on Sirius’ skin. It’s electric, and yet also calming. He’s buzzing and yet peaceful. And he still can’t look away.

Sirius is convinced he’s never once been the first one of the two to break eye contact. Because how the fuck could he ever look away from Remus’ eyes.

“Okay.” I’ll do anything you say. You don’t even have to ask. 

Sirius stares into his eyes until he looks away, as always, not breaking eye contact first.

Then he carefully takes the card of the paper and opens it with his nail the way his mother trained him to do.

It’s got a tacky 21 on the front but when Sirius opens it, it’s got quite a bit written inside. 

Dear Pads 

Happy Birthday! 

I know we don’t usually write much in these dumb cards, the gift and the day itself are the point right? But I thought maybe this time I should add something extra. 

Your 21st birthday is important Pads. And not because you can now drink legally if you ever go to America.  

Today marks 5 years since you were brave enough to leave home, sorry that’s probably not something you want me reminding you off. And yet here I am. 

You pretend like today doesn’t hurt you. But I know you. So I know it does. And that’s okay. 

You don’t listen to James or Reg when they tell you, so please listen to me, to this. You are brave Sirius. You are brave and you are sweet and you are tough. Tougher than me. And you’re so fucking smart. 

You are the most incredible person i’ve ever had the luxury of knowing. And hey, i’m not saying this out loud okay? God knows your ego’s big enough ;) So just… believe this Sirius. Believe me. Please. I’d go through anything to know you. I’d do all the dumb shit i’ve done again and again as long as I knew i’d get to keep you. 

This world is boring as shit half the time and too painful to live in the other half. And yet with you, it’s a fairytale. 

I guess you’re just magic Pads.  

So I hope you enjoy today. And the rest of your birthdays. And I hope I get the pleasure of being there for them all. 

Love, Moony ❤️

“Jesus Moony-“ Sirius chokes on a slight cry. “Fucking sappy git.” He tugs Remus’ jumper and pulls him into a hug. Remus just chuckles. 

“Open the fucking gifts Pads.” Sirius laughs.

“Damn alright Moony.” Looking back down at them, Sirius still isn’t sure what they’ll be.  

Ripping open the paper to the bigger one (James bullies him if he uses his nail to gently open it like his parents used to make him) Sirius feels its clothing. And it’s black. He takes it out to find… 

That fucking sneak. A few months ago Sirius wanted to order this old leather jacket, from a brand that went bust, but to get it he had to consistently outbid this random guy on ebay. He didn’t have the time. Remus offered to take over for him but Sirius refused, deciding (disappointed) that it wasn’t worth it.

But he must’ve done it anyway. Even when he was feeling sick. Just to win Sirius a fucking jacket he adored. 

“This is the jacket I wanted.”

“Yeah.”

“That I couldn’t get cause I had to outbid someone all day.”

“Yeah.”

“That I told you not to try and get for me cause you were sick.”

“Yeah…”

He’s blushing. Well- they’re both blushing. Sirius is blushing because Remus fucking Lupin worked so hard to get him an amazing gift, and Remus is… well he’s probably blushing out of embarrassment. He hates it when people compliment him, which technically Sirius hasn’t done yet but the intention is there. 

“Thank you.” He tries to sound as sincere as possible. He wants Remus to understand how much he appreciates him.

“Just open the other one.”

Sirius looks at the small box. He has no idea what could be in it (within reason, it’s obviously some sort of jewellery). 

He unwraps it and opens the box.

And it’s his old rings.

The ones he left behind, at his house, when he ran away. 

He’d gotten them at a one-time, random stand in London with Remus when he was 15. They were expensive but fucking good quality. He wished he’d remembered to grab them when he ran. He’d searched forever to find the people who ran the stand. And no rings since had felt the same.

“What the- Moons how the hell did you get these?” There’s silence for a moment before-

“What are they?” If he’s being totally honest, Sirius forget James was even there.

“Look-“ Sirius tips the box towards James, and he gasps, “That’s the rings you lost!” 

Sirius looks back at Remus.

“I just- you bring them up sometimes. You got most things when you left, and Reg brought some things, but your parents bragged about burning them, and I can tell it bothers you that you lost them. Not that it was at all your fault. Anyway, I had a picture, of the inside of one. I’d sent it to Lily after you bought them. And I noticed the photo had an engraving on it, I zoomed in and it was the name of this company. I checked it out, turns out it was a little family company and they still had a little ring shop in Italy. So I had my friend Grant, he’s in Italy for uni, drop by the shop and look. Turns out they did all their work as custom designs but I had some photos of the rings on your hands, so I sent them to Grant and the people there recreated them. That’s why I stole a bunch of your rings 4 months back. To photo them with a coin, for measuring. So they’ll all fit on different fingers.” 

Remus is staring at his feet the whole time as he speaks, as if Sirius is going get mad that he went to so much effort to get him the most thoughtful and lovely gift of all time. Fuck. Remus Lupin. How was Sirius ever supposed to not fall in love with him? 

“I- I don’t know what to- thank you Remus. Thank you so, so much. Fuck, you’re so amazing, and sweet-“ And there’s the blushing from the compliments, “You are so fucking lovely and kind and thoughtful.” Sirius can think of anymore words so he pulls Remus in for yet another hug. 

It lasts longer than it probably should.

“Erm- not to interrupt or anything- but we’re totally gonna be late and this is erm- is sort of still going.” Sirius turns around to James. 

“What’s still going?” James blinks and then Sirius remembers. 

“Oh the live thingy.” They’ve probably been half in shot the whole time. Remus doesn’t seem bothered, but Sirius is kinda pissed off. This is a moment for them, the internet doesn’t need to see it.

“There’s plenty of things they don’t see Pads. It’s okay. We still have our privacy.” Remus whispers in his ear. Fucking mind reader. 

“Right. Well. We’d best turn it off so I can put these rings on and go to Marlene’s. Bye.” 

Sirius shuts it off before James even gets the chance to say anything. 

He turns to the others with a smile, “Text Marlene, tell her we’re about to leave, i’m just gonna put these on.” Sirius holds up the box and runs to his room.

All the rings fit perfectly. 

Thanks for reading ✨❤️ (I hope you can’t tell I know nothing about jobs or chefs or fashion or university tests or clothes or rings) 

[nikethestatue]

Do you think booktok promotes anti intellectualism? I’ve noticed more and more outlets outside of the book community as a whole make videos and articles about the topic.

I would agree. Im no longer eager to tell anyone that i read as hobby even as an elder millennial. I’ve noticed a shift in the assumptions that are made about readers and its not good.

I still read like crazy, just unfortunately have to keep it to myself now.

I would say that it promotes extreme groupthink.

I think it's militant in its hounding of anyone who voices opinions that differ from the established status quo.

Whether it's authors or readers, TinkTok crowd goes after everyone who isn't following whatever the established dogma is.

It's just an offshoot of cancel culture really.

If we consider SJM, actually, her complete lack of engagement and involvement in any social media, including TIkTok, is actually very understandable. Why would she willingly submit herself to interacting with people who call her names, pin all kinds of 'sins' on her, accuse her of this and that? She wouldn't. And neither should she.

Assumptions are made about everyone, mostly completely baseless, but the damage is already done.

Ultimately, TikTok, like all things, will go away. BookTok will as well. Unfortunately, it might do too much damage before it disappears.

[alexjcrowley]

Hey I just want to know something: am I the stupidest person on the planet or the f1 fandom is built differently?

Everytime I go on a social media to look up f1 content I see cute/horny (let's be honest) edits and everybody calling the drivers pookie or making memes. And that's alright, I guess.

I most definitely know that a bunch of (mostly white) men in a very competitive male-dominated sport rooted more than many others in capitalism are probably going to have scandals around them. I am not that dumb. I also know that because probably none of them is scandal-free and people who get crushes/hyperfixation on them just learn to live with them, but I didn't think they just...ignored them? Swept them under the rug? Let me explain.

When I so much as stumble on a TikTok with a song by The 1975 or McCafferty- or hell even Lovejoy recently- I see comments flooding with "bUt DoN't YoU kNoW tHeY'rE pRoBlEmAtIC?". Same happened with content about cinema or books. And on Tumblr happens less but still happens. As soon as you mention something that has ties with sexism, racism, homophobia, etc. people will soon point it out to you. Maybe because they're some of those people with the obsession of only consuming "morally pure" content, maybe they genuinely want to inform you, maybe they fucking hate that song/book/movie and want to give YOU a reason to dislike it.

But can someone tell me if I'm fucking dumb and I managed to stumble in the wrong part of instagram/tumblr/TikTok or NOBODY fucking talks about the shit some drivers have done? Because I am stumbling on a LOT of shit done by drivers I really liked lately even though I have been interested in F1 for a while now. Not too long, but enough that I think I would have heard some stuff.

Like, if I spent like 6 months on the hashtag of Guy Who Drives, why am I now finding out that they said something really discriminatory? I am just confused, I simply thought it would have popped out sooner, but apparently it was buried under 500+ posts about their abs? Like what?

I get that anyway it's not like you can cancel a driver, no matter what shit they say they'll probably still going to be racing the next weekend, but why people don't talk about it? Was my socials' fault for showing me horny posts everytime I simply looked up the name of a guy or do people don't talk about this stuff in the f1 community because "what are you gonna do anyway"?

I am leaning towards the second option because there are a few things that happened while I was already watching f1 (not in order: Lando's comments about, Trump, Hornergate, most drivers saying Hornergate was just noise) and at first people were talking about it but then they just...stopped? Like, I don't know, personally the words of disenterest many drivers expressed about Hornergate made me change my opinion about them at least a little and people seemed so outraged at first but now...it's like it never happened. Everybody back thirsting on main for Ricciardo, Norris, etc.

Genuine question, is the general response of the f1 community to these behaviours "forgive and forget in time of the next gp"? Am I missing something? I don't think they should be crucified but why I have not seen more people talking about this stuff? The "serious sport bunch" seems to be uninterested in "gossip" or whatever happens outsid the tracks, the good old fashioned fandom is writing fanfiction/making edits/funny posts, who keeps tracks of this stuff?

I have never been interested in a sport before. In the artistic world (cinema, literature, etc.) some scandals can get you out of a job and a long lasting hatred from the community. In motorsports, because the success of a driver does not depend from his fans' engagement but can be "objectively proved" by results and victories, do people just...make peace with the fact that some athletes are pieces of shit?

I want to specify it one more time, I am NOT saying LET'S CANCEL ALL THE DRIVERS AND BOO THEM BECAUSE THEY HAVE DONE SOMETHING QRONG AT SOME POINT, I am asking:

how do you deal when an athlete you cheer for does something really fucked up, and you know other athletes in the same field are no saints?

[wuzhere75]

Recommendations for additional/alternative social media?

This blog and my wider public social media presence are approaching two years old. While it has been a good time and I am grateful for the following I have attained and friends I have made, I am curious about using other social media. Sure, Tumblr is not the most obscure social media, but it’s more niche than a lot of others. I am interested in taking commissions some time in future and am interested in growing my audience in general, but I also just want to discover new artists and find new inspirations. I already have Reddit and Discord accounts, but from what I understand most people do not use Reddit for personal-blog type social media even though you can post art there, and I’d prefer to keep Discord for personal use. Remember even if I where to create other accounts, I’d probably still use Tumblr as my primary social media

Here is a list of sites I am already aware of, and their personal pros and cons in my eyes (ordered from of most interested to least interested):

Deviantart

+Art focused

+Decently popular (?)

-Had the entire AI debacle. I mean Tumblr essentially turned around and did the same thing, but it still makes me feel weird

-At least from what I understand, there was a mass exodus to other social media sites after the AI debacle and in the past few years in general

-From what I have heard, certain communities can be toxic (though that’s true of all social media)

YouTube

-I actually am genuinely interested in getting into YouTube, it’s just mostly a thing where I don’t know what I’d upload at this point outside of silent speedraws. If I ever actually learn audio/video editing I might go for it, but it would be some time in the future

Instagram/Threads (Lumped together because from what I understand you need one to have the other)

+In the case of Instagram, incredibly popular

-Pretty much forgotten in the case of Threads

-Anything made by Meta gives me the squick. That’s not to say Tumblr’s owners/the owners or runners of any social media are “good” by any means, but still. Even I were to use these, I’d probably focus on output my own work on there rather than interacting with other users.

-Once again I have heard that some subsections of Instagram can be pretty toxic

Furaffinity

+Niche, but its a niche that would probably overlap somewhat with my work and interests

-I have heard the owners/mods are either shitty people themselves or at least associate with shitty/problamatic people. If there where similar alternatives that did not come with said baggage I’d probably been interested in those

Xitter/TikTok

-Just no. I respect anyone who chooses to use either of these for art, they’re just not for me unless for some reason I get really desperate. Like Instagram, even I were to start using these sites, I’d probably focus on my own output rather than interacting with other users.

I left Amino off of here because I have not heard of anyone using it in a while but from what I heard it kind of went down the shitter. Bluesky (?) and ToyHouse are off of here because those require access codes (and I haven’t heard anyone talk about Bluesky in a hot minute), and I feel weird about just asking people for them. Creating my own website, wether that be through Neocities or straight up learning code, falls under the same category as YouTube, where I am interested but don’t have the skills or the time to learn the skills to operate them.

[howitendsstudio]

Is this how it ends? Not with a bang, but a whimper?

If so, thank you for the memories. If not, know that there is at least one person still waiting with peeled ears.

Whatever the case, may the gravel crunch well beneath your boots and the hoot-owls sing fearful heralds of your coming. May your feet be ever fleet as you trek through the tangled forest of life, while those who would harm you find themselves hemmed in by briars and spiteful trees.

Y'all made a cool thing and I hope you know that <3

Hello, and thanks for your question, kind wishes, and for saying you're excited about our story and want it to continue. I thought about how to respond to this, and instead of only replying that we're working on it and it's coming soon, I wanted to write a more personal response. 

There have been long gaps in between seasons before this one. And the honest truth about that is because we're are two people (with a contracted amazing team of VAs) who have families, chronic illnesses, jobs (and job instability), and day-to-day stuff that sometimes hinders the amount of time and money we can dedicate towards How it Ends Studio. We are fully self-financed, save for the generous support we get from Patrons. 

That said, despite those long gaps, we always come back. And we always will. This story will be seen through to its end. Even then, there are countless other stories we dream up all the time that we hope to tell in the future. So, thank you for your continued enthusiasm and support of our show. We love making it for you and anyone else who stumbles across it.

We are excited to announce that we are working on Season 4. We just finished up recording the first five episodes of the season, which will then go into the editing process while Stephanie and I continue writing. 

We have mostly posted about it on our feed on the ever-dying social media platform that was Twitter. It used to be where we could reach our audience the best. But since its rapid decline, reaching our listeners has been incredibly difficult. Many people (rightfully so) abandoned Twitter, and besides our other established accounts, we genuinely don't know where we can reach folks like you. 

We have a Patreon. Sign up for a free account, and when we post announcements, they go to everyone, including Free tier members. We have been communicating regularly with our followers there. We also have an email newsletter, but we are sparing about how many emails we send, so Patreon is more active.

Join our Discord Community. It's quiet since we are between seasons, but even then, we check in when we can. The truth is that there are so many places we'd like to reach folks, current listeners, and new ones, but we only have so much energy and time to manage a few social media platforms. So, we want you all to tell us where you are so we can reach you! Is it Tumblr? Email? Online communities? Blue Sky? TikTok? Instagram? Patreon? Discord? 

At the end of the day, we have to pick and choose where we spend our energy, and most of the time, we end up brushing socials aside not because we don't want to engage with our community but because we need to spend the time producing the show you love listening to and we love to make. 

Please consider this a request for information, guidance, etc. How can we stay in touch with you? What do you want to see from us when we're in production and not actively airing episodes? What would encourage you (the collective "you", not singling you out @bookshopsbizarreblog) to keep up with us during off season? We genuinely want to know so we can improve this aspect of show-making. 

Anyway, thank you again for reaching out. I appreciate the space to answer you outside of the traditional 140 characters. I hope you can appreciate my honesty about our process! But... Stay tuned ;). Season 4 is coming, and it's going to surprise you. We promise. -m.

[northwest-cryptid]

I believe I've finally figured out why this website feels so exhausting to me. It's a few reasons but they all sort of funnel down into the same sort of "overall thing" which is that you're not allowed.

Allowed to what? Anything.

No no, stay with me a moment here let me explain.

See Tumblr doesn't really have an algorithm outside of the "For You" tab, everything you see is funneled into your dash through the people you follow, and by extension the people they follow, and then their dashboard is populated by the people they follow. What this means is that you don't have a lick of real privacy here.

That's true for most of the internet, however if I make my own website, host my own blog; and write my own thoughts and opinions there. It's a pretty clear concept that what I'm writing is mostly for me, secondarily for you as the reader; and ultimately not for "everyone" which is fine.

What we have on tumblr is essentially a huge open forum, where anyone can add anything; to any post. Which isn't inherently the issue, but you've got so many smaller fandoms, communities, and politically aligned groups who believe whatever the hot topic of the week is.

Which, for all the nuance people want to put forth in issues like "do you like coffee" becoming "I only like certain kinds" or "I only like certain flavors" or "I only like it cold!" Suddenly becomes a no nuance "no actually coffee is bitter." If you dare to say "well not all coffee is bitter" you're labeled with "oh look they said #Not All Coffee!" You're sent anon hate, you're ridiculed and dragged through the mud for stating something. It doesn't matter how right you might be either, if it's not popular to side with you; people won't do so.

Obviously my coffee question metaphor is a sort of blanket example that is meant to encompass a broader topic of discussion. We don't talk about the nuance of issues, everything is black and white; and furthermore people act like they want to.

But because it's an open forum for everyone, someone from an opposing side of the argument, or someone who doesn't like what you're saying or how much attention it's getting; can easily toss in their two cents.

Your only option to stop this? Disable reblogs from everyone, stop the conversation with you. Isolate yourself to the point using SOCIAL media is all but pointless. I have enjoyed using this website significantly less after having to turn off asks and submissions, but can you blame me when I was actively getting hate and annoying remarks on the daily?

Now normally I'd argue "hey if that many people don't like me maybe I'm doing or saying something wrong!" Thing is, it's not like I've not reflected on that; when I get some form of hate, I tend to do my best to ignore the actual hate and focus on what's trying to be said under the layers of "go kill yourself." Typically it's "I don't like what you're saying" or "you said too much and I didn't bother reading it all because I have TikTok brain!" However there's a handful of times when people actually do explain their side of the argument politely and I can sort of learn that this isn't the place to talk about certain things.

Like when I openly talk about how porn addiction isn't real, I get a lot of people saying they themselves are victims of it. Yea fam I thought I used to be as well, and then I educated myself about what addiction really is; and understood the nuance of the situation:

To put it plainly, addiction is when your brain chemistry is physically changed in a way where you form a genuine dependency on the substance that changed it. This change can be temporary or permanent; which means something like coffee can be actually addicting since it can even temporarily make you dependent on the caffeine to function.

However, did you know; that there's literally no way to change your brain chemistry with pornography? Yea believe it or not, that's a total myth. That being said it's not a myth that masturbation does release dopamine and generally can help people suffering from a lack of dopamine; typically this involves people who are depressed.

This is a two fold thing, since if you're not literally ace your brain likely produces hormones that tell you that you're supposed to be reproducing; which means it will more easily motivate you to masturbate than say, play a video game or listen to music.

You brain isn't just concerned with producing dopamine, it's just hardwired for survival of the species; so you can easily get yourself to jack off but god forbid you try to do something fun with your time. Depression is just sort of like that; you lack the motivation to do much of anything, so falling back on masturbation for a quick hit of dopamine is easy.

Now this causes a feedback loop where you find the easiest, and most effective method of keeping yourself happy is to watch porn and jack off. That's not a clinical addiction; that's just literally the nature of your brain at work.

Why do I say all of this? Because this is the sort of thing I can't talk about on this site; not without 50 random anon messages either agreeing with me or telling me this is a women's issue and I shouldn't talk on it "as a man." Which is fun because I thought we were all supportive of LGBT but it turns out I'm not a valid NB because I don't shave my facial hair or something.

We don't discuss the nuance, we don't actually bother to read and understand what each other have to say; we just get mad about shit constantly. How dare you have an opinion that I don't have.

We say buzz words are bad, but then we use buzz words when they benefit us.

We say generalization is bad when it applies to the LGBT, or PoC but you know; those white people and cis and christians are all the same... right?

Talking on this site is like walking through a mine field; my mutuals might politely just go about their day, or maybe even agree with me. God forbid my post "breach containment" I start getting messages from people I don't even know. People start commenting and reblogging on my posts to yell at me about shit I literally covered already.

I can literally say "I don't think this is bad, but I think it's a bit more nuanced than this and we need to look at it from this angle too" and I'll get comments saying "I can't believe you think this is bad!" To which I just kind of sit there wondering how you somehow couldn't be fucked to actually read what I said and understand it.

I know we joke about the reading comprehension on this site, but I am serious when I say people will READ what I say; but not COMPREHEND what I say. I didn't understand how or why that was happening for a long time and now I think I finally get it.

It's because this site is all about knee-jerk emotional reaction response.

Don't tell me it's not, think about it; every time someone on this site needs help or financial aid what are the first words you see?

Typically it's some form of their entire label chain "help a lesbian, genderfluid, PoC, with [Disabilities] pay rent!" Not just "Hey I lost my job and need help paying my bills" Like dude I'd help if I could in either scenario but when you lead in with literally like 10 random labels I have to wonder if maybe you're trying to say "we're the same you and I, we come from the same community" or if you're trying to say "you get woke points for helping ME because I'm not just some cis white straight guy!" It feels like borderline guilt tripping.

When we see posts about how "love language" is fake, I'm literally told "it was invented by some CHRISTIAN MAN so he could PRESSURE his POOR WIFE into SEX!" Like whoa boy that's one hell of a claim; even if it's true that's still a bit of an emotionally charged statement you know?

It's like, well sure; I'd love to talk about how the concept of love languages isn't entirely false. To say that is to ignore that people love in different ways, and feel loved in different ways. Let's not even get me started, as someone who became hypersexual thanks to being sexually abused (and yes I am in fact amab, and was in fact groomed by a cis woman when I was a minor; and she was a 26 year old in the navy. Later I was again sexually abused by a cis woman when I was a few years older.) On the topic of the whole "people pressure others into sex saying it's the only way they feel worth and love." Like alright yea let's literally not perhaps look into that trauma response and maybe try to help these people live normal lives.

It's the same way I see people talk about pornography. They go off about the porn industry being extremely horrible towards women. Which like, yea it absolutely can be; and mostly is. There's no mention of the way we view men, and how the way the media portrays men is just as harmful to young boys with self esteem issues and all that. We don't talk about how stupid the idea of dick size mattering is; no we in fact reinforce negative amab issues by saying "that's small dick energy bro" and the like. You bring that up and people will say you're ignoring women's issues; absolutely the fuck I'm not? I'm just trying to make you aware the problem is actually larger than just that. "Oh but we're just focusing on this right now" right, that's fine; but you're literally ignoring the other problems.

It's like how when people bring up how there's bans on pornography or, how people view pornography we always have to make it about how this effects the LGBT before people care. We go around saying "sex work is real work" but then we also go "these poor women on OnlyFans who are FORCED to do sex work need to be saved uwu" meanwhile I know a LOT of women who enjoy doing work on OnlyFans, and who hit me up to be their manager because I have a reputation as being a chill dude who can help them grow their numbers. I have a lot of connections in NSFW spaces and yes believe it or not sex work IS in fact real work; which is why like we should probably actually focus on the real industry problems. The women and even men being harmed by this are not typically your OnlyFans indies; but your industry people.

This is like how if I bring up the stigma on pornography I'm labeled poorly for it, I'm told I'm misogynistic which like, I don't believe I am; but believe it or not I have done a lot of self reflection on it. I even went around to a lot of women I know and sat down with them to talk about whether or not they believed I was misogynistic or if I had some form of unnoticed internalized misogyny. Do you know what those women (and yes, some were in fact; as we say here on tumblr transwomen) had to tell me? They literally told me that I need to chill the fuck out and get off tumblr because it was only contributing to my anxiety.

You're not allowed to talk about things on this site, because you're not allowed to be wrong. You're not allowed to grow and change, you're not allowed to have a flawed opinion that needs to be workshopped with some other people who could talk with you on the subject. You're not allowed to be given kindness, you're not allowed to speak up on issues that matter to you.

It's how I speak up on Native issues, even more specifically sometimes Lakota issues. Only to have other Natives and even other Lakota disagree with me; and then a bunch of their followers dogpile into my inbox to tell me how stupid and wrong and bad I am for having lived the experience of being a "breed" back during a time when racism in Native communities was much more rampant than it still is.

On this site you're told how bad and wrong and sad it is, that we as people have been reduced to being "content creators" who have to make the most palatable entertainment for the masses. Then you speak to a niche, say something about your lived experience; or simply have an opinion and whoops there it is. You're now public enemy number 1, all those posts about how it's rotten and evil and wrong to tell someone to kill themself? That doesn't matter anymore, not to the dozens of anons in your inbox who have found "slightly more creative ways" to say the same thing.

You either get to be an aesthetics blog, who never has an opinion, or a voice of their own; and you get to keep your ask box open and enjoy being toted around as a good person and shit. Or you speak your mind and immediately get labeled by someone as something.

Tumblr is no better than twitter in this regard, it's no better than reddit; it's not even any better than 4chan if I'm being honest. We just really don't want to admit that because there ARE a handful of us who are genuinely just chill people trying to enjoy blogging and staying in our lane. The problem comes when other people decide they're going to merge into oncoming traffic without so much as a turn signal because they revel in the discourse.

It sucks because I cannot tell you how valuable discussion and such is to me. I cannot tell you how many times I've come out here and said my piece, spoke my mind; and someone has politely come out to the post to mention things from their own angle. We have a back and forth, maybe we both learn something. I walk away with information I didn't have before, and they do as well. It's a way for us to see things from someone else's perspective. We're all unique individuals, we all have different lived experiences; we all know stuff other's do not. I value that information, the interaction we're allowed to have as human beings who can communicate.

This website however does not.

It feels strongly like this website merely wants to tell me to shut up and kill myself.

But hey, don't worry I'll probably reblog a funny video of a cat; or wholesome anime picture; or a funny meme in 2 minutes and we'll all just move on with our day.

[justwildman]

Sad that the only way you find that "culture is happening" is online instead of participating in culture and community in real life and that you assume not wanting to follow the "latest trends", follow baseless "influencers" not wanting to consume literal useless content slop is in any way "conservative ideology", unserious comparison if made simple, not having tiktok = conservative ideology, stupid right? Because it is.

Maybe you felt attacked at the joke about how someone is better than you for not using an app you consider important because you feel lesser when you are reminded you get all your news and information from teenagers making slides to the latest pop song on tiktok and are trying to justify your "chronically online" status by calling someone a conservative over, uh, not using tiktok.

The previous ask touches on a lot of this. But here I'll make the case For Tiktok.

What is currently happening on Tiktok, I would almost call it cultural globalisation.

Now, your mileage may vary, but my FYP consists mostly of people talking about esoteric concepts, Palestinian first-person perspective, the surge of culture in China from their rising middle class. I see autistic and disabled people talking about their own experiences. But of course, these are my interests.

What I've been getting a lot lately are artists with very small followings. Now, I'm not lucky enough to live in a geographic region with the kind of music venues where up-and-coming artists have a chance to perform. My local geographic region only has the homogeneous American strip mall culture. If I go outside, I'm looking at things that have already happened, culturally. There is a culture death in mainstream America.

Now, its very easy when you dont participate in something to reduce it down to the worst attributes you see in it in order to dismiss it. Going off of the description provided here. And as long as you see it in this way, of course you're not going to be interested.

I can't begin to elucidate to you the growth I've experienced through shared ideas I've gotten from tiktok. You have college educated people basically writing essays in video form, connecting what they're learning in their classes to current events, educating more people through their efforts.

Cultural globalization, as I stated, does not mean we are approaching a point of homogenization. Quite the opposite, the insight into each culture ilicits a celebration of the uniqueness of it. I've been exposed to far more, broadening my view of the world, through my use of the app.

If you want to focus on the worst aspects, the content creators who cater to children and the immature, you are free to characterize it in your own world as such.

I'm just saying that choosing that ignorance is limiting to yourself. Sorry.

[0pawprint0]

Fickle Fandom

Warning: crass language (I have no filter)

I need to rant about something I’ve noticed. Unfortunately, I deal with a person like those I’m about to talk about in real life and it’s not fun. This essay/rant is extremely informal and just me getting my thoughts out there, so please excuse the text talk, slang, shortcuts, etc. I am also very tired when typing this, so please cut me some slack if I don’t say what I’m wanting to in the most eloquent way!

I’m sure a lot of people have noticed that fandom spaces have become incredibly toxic. What used to be a fun place for weirdos (/pos) to feel safe and accepted is now being torn to shreds by people who can’t stand others having fun. TikTok is a great example of how a safe place for fandom behavior quickly became a cesspit of negativity. This post mostly focuses on cosplay. TikTok was basically built on cosplay. That used to be the main thing you’d find on the app! As more and more people started using it, it started to have different kinds of content, and now cosplay tends to get shoved down in favor of something more appealing to a wider demographic. Unfortunately, this means a lot of mean-spirited people have too much to say about a community they are not even part of.

The hate for cosplayers is unreal. Cosplayers aren’t doing anything wrong. We are dressing up as characters for fun. It is not hurting you. If you see something you don’t want to see, it is not hard to swipe past it. Ignore it. Interacting with it will ensure more content like it will reach your fyp. But some people just want to be mean and love the chance to get to do so. People make fun of cosplayers now like it’s their job. They insult them and throw fits like toddlers the moment they see them. Most hate for cosplayers is rooted in ableism, by the way! Fun fact! The word "cringey" has been twisted by sad people to target neurodivergent individuals. Many cosplayers (not all, but many) are neurodivergent. Many cosplayers are lgbt+, too. And you bet homophobia and transphobia is rampant in fandom spaces, too!

The hate doesn’t stop at people who don’t have nerdy interests, either. Oh no. Even people from fandoms are rude towards cosplayers! People will complain about "cringey" cosplayers "ruining" fandoms. Spoiler alert: there are cosplayers in every fandom. Kindly, get over it. People enjoy their fandoms in different ways! Some people write fanfiction and draw fanart, some consume fanfiction and fanart, some only interact with the original media, and some cosplay. All are valid ways to enjoy it! Hating on others for how they interact with their fandom is ridiculous, to say the least. The people ruining fandoms are the ones who can’t stand seeing others have fun. I’m sorry your life is so boring you can’t stand seeing others being creative and having a good time. However, that doesn’t give you the excuse to be a dickhead. Policing how someone expresses their love of something is not cool. Anyone who does this is actually a pathetic little weenie.

Let me get into my personal experience! Remember how I mentioned I have someone like this irl? Let me tell you about the interaction that spurred this rant! I am preparing for a con at this very moment. This weekend! Some context here: I am a cosplayer. I have been doing it for years and it’s a hobby that I love and don’t plan on giving up on anytime soon. I am also someone who is very inspired by drag and I enjoy doing my makeup inspired by cartoons and drag queens. This person absolutely cannot stand it when I decide to even put on a little makeup for the heck of it. Oops, I’m also someone who does my makeup occasionally outside of cosplay! The incognito nerd saw me carrying some of my makeup to my bag and stopped me to go, "You’re not gonna dress like a CLOWN, are you?" This could be taken literally, but I’m pretty sure it was meant to be an insult. This person insults my makeup often, claiming I don’t do it right (there is no right way to do makeup, btw). They also generally insult the way I dress. I told them no, but why would it matter?

"Because it’s embarrassing! Don’t embarrass me!" Babe, YOU embarrass ME tbh! I literally told them straight up, "This place is going to be filled with cosplayers and people like me. I don’t know what to tell you." If you are someone who gets embarrassed of cosplayers, a con probably isn’t the place for you. What used to be a safe space for cosplayers is now overrun by people who don’t know how to have fun. I should not have to worry about being harassed and made fun of at a place where people like me are supposed to thrive. Please, loosen the stick in your asshole ever so slightly so you can see that cons are meant to be fun! If you’re easily overloaded by "cringey" stuff, please stay home. You sour the mood and suck the life of everyone around you. Okay, sponge mop?

I can’t even get into how some other cosplayers treat cosplayers. That is a whole other can of worms I simply cannot get into right now. We will be here all night. Cosplay is not a clout contest. It is not about who is most accurate to the character. Cosplay is supposed to be FUN! And it is for everyone! No one is too old to cosplay. No one is too fat to cosplay. No one is too skinny to cosplay. No one should feel restricted because of skin color. No one should feel restricted because of gender. No one should feel restricted because of money. No one should feel bad about cosplaying, ever. People can stylize characters. People can make closet cosplays. Cosplay is for everyone. If I see any more cosplayers bringing other cosplayers down, I’m gonna lose it.

My point is, fandom spaces aren’t as fun as they used to be. I miss when I could walk into a con with a barely recognizable Juuzou Suzuya cosplay and still get complimented for trying (real experience! Those cosplayers were so kind!). I miss when I didn’t feel like I’d be judged for entering a space I should feel safe in. I miss when I could drag up my cosplay as much as I want without someone telling me the makeup is too much. I miss when fandom spaces were fun. If you can’t handle fandom activity in a fandom space, you should reflect on why you don’t like it. Most likely, it’s jealousy others can enjoy themselves so freely. Let others have fun. Just because you’re miserable doesn’t mean everyone else has to be.

[no-1-rosalind-lang-apologist]

ok one of the things that i really dislike about booktok and similar online book communities at least from like. my experience with them because i avoid them most of the time now. is the thing where there's one half that doesn't really care and is usually the "let people enjoy things" group and will read sjm and colleen hoover or like all of the popular problematic booktok books or whatever. and then there's the other side that is a lot better about reading diversely and social justice issues in general which is great in theory and certainly has a positive effect to whatever extent but like. it all seems so weird to me because the point of all of these communities doesn't seem to be to just like talk to other people about your love of a book or even use it as a public reading journal it mostly seems to be about having a platform. and then whatever book you read and talk about on your platform you're either endorsing or condemning. so at some point it just feels like a huge percentage of it is just virtue signaling? like i'm sorry but i'd rather talk to an sjm reader who checked acotar out from the library and can acknowledge that a lot of it is shitty while still enjoying it for the escapism or whatever than someone who's bought and read every single book on whatever booktok list of new releases by queer and bipoc authors and took nothing away from any of the books. like ok great thank you so much for that list of x type of books written by authors from x marginalized group can you actually tell me what the book is about and what you got from it or is the most meaningful thing about it to you the fact that you read it which means you can now recommend me a book written by an author from [insert marginalized group here]? and this isn't every single person who has one of those platforms like there are definitely people who genuinely care it just seems so widespread and it's so fucking weird. like i have personally tried to find representation for myself by looking at these lists and i'm disappointed almost every time because believe it or not! a book having representation doesn't make it good or make the representation good or make it something you would actually enjoy reading!

then also like. sure yes. half of the issue is that on an individual level people need to do more to support marginalized authors and read things outside of their experience because that is a thing you should do because obviously (though i don't think it's going to do much if you're not willing to develop the reading comprehension to actually take anything away from it). but also. publishing companies are absolutely horrible and from my understanding booktok certainly is not making it any better, especially for marginalized authors. authors should not have to be able to sell a persona on fucking tiktok and be conventionally attractive enough for people to watch your tiktoks to be able to get published. not every book should need to be consumable to a large audience and incorporate whatever fucking tiktok trope is currently trending to sell. and if you genuinely want to help marginalized authors and are building a platform for yourself in an online book community why the fuck are you promoting and partnering with and doing free marketing for deeply bigotted publishing companies that pose systemic barriers to marginalized authors that are arguably much more of a threat than some allocishet white girl at barnes and noble who only reads colleen hoover books. and i don't know what the solution to this is but jesus christ this is driving me insane. like oh? you read one of the three new releases x publishing company was willing to publish despite their quota on the number of books they're willing to publish each year with a protagonist from x marginalized group? and they even gave you a free copy?? to promote it for them!! for free?!? wow. congratulations. would you like a free sticker. that also promotes their publishing company. so you can do more free advertising for them. instead of them actually giving enough of a shit about marginalized authors to put effort into promoting them that goes beyond free advertising on fucking tiktok and like. a post that features authors from x marginalized group on their instagram once a year.

[probablypossesedbysatan]

The differences between the cultures of tiktok and Tumblr are so different and it just absolutely bewilders me.

If no one knew there's this new thing popping up on tiktok about a 1980s movie called zepotha. It's a made up film and it's much like when people on tumblr did this with goncharov. We made up a movie and made lore about it. Except on tiktok people, got over it in about one day.

I decided to have some fun as everyone else was doing the same and comment on someone's video "omg you look just like this one character from zepotha" as a little joke. I thought the reactions to the zepotha thing that was going on would have been much like what went on with goncharov until I saw in the recommended search something along the lines of 'zepitha hate' and I just thought "oh it's gonna be made up stories of how people didn't like the movie". I was unpleasantly welcomed with masses of videos just saying things like 'can people stop now, everyone knows zepotha isn't real' and 'its embarrassing when people act like the zepotha thing is so funny'.

Things like this show me how people on tiktok can be so unpleasant and cruel to people who just want to have fun because all those people who say stuff about everyone knowing doesn't understand how that's the joy of the joke. It doesn't have to be a big secret. Everyone or no one could know. It doesn't matter as long as people are having fun.

If you remember the entire goncharov phase, mostly everyone knew what was going on and that it wasn't an actual movie, at least mostly everyone on Tumblr. There were some people outside of tumblr who didn't understand that goncharov wasn't real and that was the true joy of it. For such a wide community to be a part of something where there were no arguments on it because it just was and there was no actual divide because basically everyone had collectively decided to just go along with it. From the people who wrote detailed reviews about it to the people who said they hated the movie and didn't think they could ever like it because it was too long, I didn't see a person criticize anyone who dared to post about it. And this went on for a good amount of time and I have fond memories of going onto Tumblr to collect more news and lore about goncharov.

With tiktok however, barely a day had gone by until people already criticised the people who dared to have fun and enjoy their time on the app in their own little way. This all happened after I went onto tiktok for the first time in a while and I was deep in the Tumblr mindset so I thought the best of the situation. I should've seen it coming however, because as with many things on tiktok, whether it's people or just a silly joke, it always seems as if there is a divide on the app.