#this took years off my life but i am so fucking proud you guys have no idea

[backhurtyy]

the pain in my vein is hereditary dynasty by rina sawayama // the hobbit + the lord of the rings

[supergraphicgirl81]

With A Little Help From My Friends ⋆⁺₊❅.

Oscar Piastri ⋆.⋆✴︎˚｡⋆ˎˊ˗

Formula 1 college hockey team social media AU! Instagram Edition

The tight-knit college hockey team, the Silver Blades, run by team captain Max Verstappen, isn't just about scoring goals—it's a chosen family. On and off the ice, the team has each other's backs, whether that's through college assignments, throwing awesome parties, or winning the championship together. Follow these overworked, tired, college students as they post through their day-to-day life.

With A Little Help From My Friends Masterlist ✴︎˚｡ Oscar Piastri Masterlist ✴︎˚｡

OscarJP

liked by AlexandraSaintM, LandoNorris4, and others

OscarJP We took the kids outside

tagged ItsYourname

View Comments

AlexandraSaintM UGH! my queen, thank you oscar, i really needed this today

OscarJP I know what the people need

LandoNorris4 AHH OMG JACK FNQEFE AND BAILEY AWEE SJCJIFOEW (liked by OscarJP)

CollegeHockeyFan we love to see healthy siblings in a loving home (jack and bailey)

MaxVerstappen i need to know they love me

DanielRicciardo you are not their godfather i am therefore they love me not you

MaxVerstappen @OscarJp LITERALLY SINCE FUCKING WHEN??!?!?!!??

OscarJP He literally just made that up??? Our cats don't have godfathers

ItsYourname and even if they did they SURE as hell wouldn't be either of you monsters

DanielRicciardo homophobia (liked by MaxVerstappen)

ItsYourname i am cold (liked by OscarJP)

RandomHockeyFan they 😭 literally 😭 have 😭 a 😭 family 😭 screaming 😭 crying 😭 throwing 😭 up

view all comments!

liked by CharLeclerc, LilyMuniHe, and others

OscarJP Hockey stuff lately

tagged ChargingSarge and Albono

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ChargingSarge If Alex shoots one more hockey puck at me I think I would literally crumble on the spot

Albono Oh come on, they weren't even hitting you (liked by OscarJP)

ChargingSarge UHHH I'M PRETTY SURE I WOULD KNOW IF THEY WEREN'T HITTING ME ALEX

RandomHockeyFan I have hopes for better playing this season, seems like they've got a strong team built, even some newbies.

Random Who new has been added? I thought it's been the same players since Lando and Oscar arrived with Logan and Yuki???

RandomFan Franco Colapinto!!!!! He's actually a freshmen, so it'll be interesting to see how this plays out

GeorgeRus Have Jersey in the laundry room by 9 if you want it washed. (liked by OscarJP)

YukiTsunoda22 sorry again osc, i let the blind rage take hold, soup in the kitchen

OscarJP All good Yuki, thanks mate

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liked by MaxVerstappen, Franco43Colapinto, and others

OscarJP 5 years, it never gets old :))

tagged ItsYourname

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LandoNorris4 WAAHHHHHH 😭🙏 M-MY MY BABBIEESSS 🥹🥹🥹🥹 !!!!!!!

OscarJP Lando we've been dating longer then we've known you

ItsYourname WAHHH LANDDOOO 😭 😭 😭 😭 I LOVE YOU

LewHamilton I love to see it in my feed. (liked by OscarJP)

DanielRicciardo mama y papa?

MaxVerstappen I hope you guys know you literally have the longest, most stable relationship I've ever seen in my life, genuinely.

ItsYourname is this trauma dumping?

ItsYourname AYYYYY PASTA WAS BOMB

OscarJP Is that all you want to say?

ItsYourname AYYYYY dick was also bomb? (liked by OscarJP)

ItsYourname i love you ♡

OscarJP I love you too!

view all comments!

liked by ItsYourname, LewHamilton, and others

OscarJP Team wins a championship and all of a sudden I'm in a suit (I hope we get invited back next year)

tagged CharLeclerc, GeorgeRus, MaxVerstappen, LilyMuniHe, AlexandraSaintM, LandoNorris4

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ItsYourname OSCARRRR !!!!!!!! LOOK AT YOUUU !!!!!!!! (liked by OscarJP)

ItsYourname my favorite most polite cat in the world !!! 🥹🥹🥹

OscarJp What did I say about calling me a cat online

MaxVerstappen Great work this year Oscar, keep it up. (liked by OscarJP)

OscarJP Appreciate it man

CharLeclerc Proud dad moment 🥹

OscarJP I am not your son Charles (thanks dad)

Albono 4 points up next season, betting it now (liked by OscarJP)

view all comments!

[f1rodrigo]

sweet relief | l. norris | part four

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ it's so reckless of me...

summary: in which you fall for your best friend’s teammate and keeping it a secret proves to be harder than you intended. or when all you need is sweet relief the rest of the world fades away. pairing: social media au || lando norris x piastri bsf!reader fc: olivia rodrigo <3

inspired by the song ‘sweet relief’ by madison beer

ALL PARTS HERE

a/n: hi i'm veryyyyy sorry for how long it took me to get this one up but it has a bit more than the other parts did & its currently finals week so the end of the semester is always very busy so i didn't have much time to work on this. hope you enjoy xx

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。

landonorris added to their story

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。

📍 Tokyo, Japan

liked by landonorris, maxfewtrell, and 2,032,987 others

yourusername i don't dream of anyone else...

view all 3,098 comments

user1 SHES IN JAPAN EVERYONE UP

user2 miss girl...this caption...the rumors...is it lyrics...what does it all mean%^&(@&@(!

user3 this caption after all the rumors ohhh my girl dont give a fuckkkk

user4 can't tell if this is her confirming or denying

⤷ user5 ...or living her life and not paying it any mind

user6 WHY THE FUCK IS NO ONE TALKING ABOUT THE LAST PHOTO??? ITS LITERALLY THE ELEVATOR AND FIT SHE WAS IN FROM THE DELETED PIC ON LANDOS STORY HELLO

⤷ user7 wait omfg it is.... idk why i didnt realize it sooner ⤷ user8 pls they do not gafffff anymore basically telling us they're together ⤷ user9 omg what deleted story???? ⤷ user10 go to @/norrisupdates on twitter i think they posted it before he deleted

user11 max fewtrell in the likes oh i am Thinking

lilymhe prettiest girl <3

⤷ yourusername i love u so dearly ms lily ⤷ user12 this is wag confirmation idc

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

yourusername added to their story

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

liked by lnfour, yourusername, and 643,811 others

landonorris DOUBLE PODIUM!!!!!!!!!! Congrats mate! Thanks @/mclaren 🧡

view all 3,070 comments

mclaren Very good, very nice. 🏆🏆👏

oscarpiastri Well done mate 👊

riabish 🙌

user13 ANOTHER PODIUM THATS MY GOAT

user14 who would've thought... wow i am so proud

user15 mclaren double podium i used to pray for times like these

yourusername conhrsts 😭🧡

⤷ landonorris hmm sorry what was that ⤷ yourusername oh my god i couldn't see through my tears YOU KNEW WHAT I MEANT ⤷ user16 COULDNT SEE THROUGH HER TEARS PLSSS SHES JUST LIKE US ⤷ user17 mom and dad are fighting i dont like this

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

liked by landonorris, yourusername, and 643,811 others

oscarpiastri One for the mantelpiece 🏆 and driver of the day too!! you guys 🧡

view all 2,217 comments

user18 SOBBING MY EYES OUT

landonorris Congrats mate!!

⤷ oscarpiastri You too mate! (and i'm not talking about the podium 😉) ⤷ landonorris ...I take it back ⤷ user19 oscar piastri what the FUCK is that supposed to mean

yourusername I AM CRYING LIKE A PARENT DROPPING THEIR CHILD OFF FOR THEIR FIRST DAY OF SCHOOL

⤷ user15 yn & lando parents to oscar has now been confirmed

yourusername so beyond proud of you oscar 🥹

⤷ oscarpiastri 🧡🧡 ⤷ user20 cannot imagine how she feels watching him all her life through karting till now and getting to witness his first podium oh my gosh im crying again ⤷ user21 STFU NOW IM CRYING

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

liked by oscarpiastri, dan_nigro, and 3,981,061 others

yourusername my new single, 'sweet relief' will be all yours in one week. presave at the link in my bio<3

view all 5,910 comments

user30 BEST DAY OF MY LIFE ARE U KIDDING

user31 love song about lando calling it now

user32 sobbing my eyes out new yn music

user33 BABE WAKE UP YN YLN ANNOUNCED NEW MUSIC

landonorris 🔥

⤷ user34 real

logansargeant lets goooo

user34 HIT OF THE YEAR INCOMING

user35 cannot wait oh my fucking god

alex_albon lily and i will be streaming❗️❗️

⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆。 ﾟ☾ ﾟ。⋆⋆。ﾟ☁︎。⋆

tagged:

@allywthsr , @2bormaybenot , @vellicora

[payasita]

Good job getting ADHD medication! I’m so proud of you :D

thanks so so much im very happy and so hopeful for the first time maybe ever but also it TOOK ME LIKE. A YEAR. A YEAR.

like yall for real?? for real. for real i have been diagnosed since i was like six. (funny story my teacher thought i was on the spectrum so my parents get me tested with the nodes and shit and according to mom, who loves this story, my neurologist did all that and talked to me and then just turned to my mom and went "she's not autistic. she just hates the other kids" but they DID find an adhd diagnosis in there so net win for all of us)

diagnosed since i was SIX. on stimulants until i turned 8, and you know why i got off em? my pediatrician retired. we could not find another who would take our low-income insurance. so i just had to rawdog The Rest Of My Fucking Life. diagnosed when i was six. legally neurodivergent for 20 slutty slutty angry years.

and it still took me like. a few months to get a psych appointment. a few weeks to reaffirm my diagnosis as an adult. a few more weeks for another appointment for meds. he doesnt Want to do meds first, because i must have been doing fine without them if its been two decades, right? i got a job and a car and everything. well gee fuckin shittickers Dr. Brain Guy, just WHAT was my alternative? would you prefer i be maladapted to the point of incapacitation; is that what it takes for someone to be considered? i cheated my way through school. every day after work i sit for an hour in my car because i dont have the executive function to stand up and walk the ten steps to my house. garbage just appears around me. i have three empty bags of hot chip and two cans of sprite on my desk as we speak, neither from today. at that point i hadnt had a debit card for six months because that would have required me to Drive To The Bank, a location that was new to me in this area, so i just did everything on credit. is this all normal? is this fine? am i GOOD, actually, Dr. WeirdBrain?

so we cordially agree that yes i should probably be medicated. i want to do a stimulant. he does not want to put me on a stimulant. "stimulants can mess with your heart," he says, "and you're young, you don't want heart problems." i say ok because i dont want to make him think im just looking for narcotics. even though i am. because they WORK. i agree to try some kind of antidepressant.

the antidepressant gives me tachycardia. i go to the emergency room after reading a heartbeat of, oh, 140 bpm, which is about like double what it normally is and juuuust below the You Are Having A Heart Attack threshold. i get to the ER and the doctor there is very obviously convinced i'm a local addict having some sort of episode. it is the most ironic experience i've had all year and i feel an abrupt and all consuming kinship with those birds in australia that will swoop you and peck at your face for seemingly no good reason.

so yeah, we narrow it down to the antidepressant. as it turns out, these particular meds are known to, semi-commonly, Mess With Your Heart. i have my next appointment with my psych and somehow refrain from pecking his eyes out. he puts me on a noreprinephrine inhibitor(iirc) that isnt actually FDA approved to treat ADHD specifically(i DEFINITELY rc) but it IS given to smokers to help them quit. i dont smoke. i may very well fucking start before this whole ordeal is at the point where someone listens to me

it obviously does a combined total of jack and shit, and the man waffles with this one because he has "had success" using it as treatment for other ADHD patients. he ups the dose. twice. three months on the smoker meds, which are also apparently notorious for destroying your appetite, but they didnt even do THAT. no change to the average amount of hot chip on my desk.

he wants to try quelbree after that. i finally tell him i'm tired of this shit and would like to have more than two hours of usable daylight to function before it all falls to uncontrollable youtube shorts binges and a daily experience i like to call The Weighted Nothings and i would very much like to PLEASE. TRY A STIMULANT.

he's been friendly enough with me over these past four or five or whatever months but at this he gets suddenly very very business-baseline. gives me the whole spiel about the north american shortage. gives me a spiel about how i absolutely cannot, under any circumstances, lose or sell this medication, because they will not refill it if i do. i am sitting here wondering if he he's telling the truth about having other ADHD patients at all like ever in his career, and also, am i nuts or should the "don't sell your prescription drugs" bit apply to EVERYTHING? i dont fuckin know man i just live here

he says he wants a urine test first. its scheduled for two weeks out. i take it.

"hey uh, your piss came back with cannabis in it" "well it'd be weirder if it didn't, we are in california and i am a kitchen manager" "you can't have weed if you want adderall" "fine i'll stop" "we'll schedule you another test in a month" "aight bet" it didnt go exactly like that but this is kind of what the vibe between us has devolved into by this point.

anyway i wait a month and get a good grade in piss. i get the meds prescribed. i go to fill out the prescription

all i really need to say to you are the words "prior authorization error" for most of you to get what happened next.

the psych isnt even aware. i wait another month for our next meeting, which was yesterday. i do not yell at him. he tells me to take it up with the pharmacy, and yell at them. i am going to yell at them.

so i go, and guess what, it actually went through a while ago! NO ONE TOLD ME OR DR. FEEL-BAD OVER HERE. but we can't fill it right now because its a controlled substance so come back in a few hours. hey it's ready where the hell are you? TAKE YOUR METH AND GET OUT

anyway i started it today, reorganized my pantry, and fixed the fire alarm in my hallway that's been chirping at me for a week. i no longer have to wear earplugs to bed.

and with my newfound executive function superpowers, i will be spraying my weed-free piss all over Reagan's grave.

[firesnap]

i have a genuine question. i promise i am not at all trying to defend him. ive dropped him entirely, literally deleted everything i had of him and unliked his songs.

ive just been wondering like considering that he has been in therapy, and also considering how if he does take a year off and then comes back, why cant it be redeemable? like cant people change? cant we give them second chances? he is 27. is he just doomed to be an abuser forever?

its just scary and im asking as like a younger person who is in my very early 20s. i know ive made mistakes. i know ive not been a good partner or friend sometimes. (and yes i was also abusive to a past partner...im not proud of it and ive learned from it. i have never ever touched anyone in that way after that. it took awhile but my current relationship isnt toxic and i would never hurt anyone or hit them again yknow?) and it scares me that people keep insinuating that he is irredeemable. like cant abusers change and become better? dont they get second chances? if shelby has grown and healed in 10 months wouldn't it be fair to say the same for wilbur?

im just genuinely asking because based on everything i believe you are older than me and im looking for guidance and just...idk im scared. growing up on the internet has made me so scared of making mistakes and doing anything wrong because when it happens to others i look up to, its always treated as something they'll never be able to change or improve. makes me feel like imma just be a horrible person forever because i made mistakes in the past.

This is a really complicated question that multiple answers can validly fit.

I don't think, personally, that anyone is irredeemable. I think everyone is on a journey of forgiveness and some of us may need more grace than others.

This is tw// abuse even more than the current topic, but my mom was incredibly abusive. We lived in a very rural area and she had a lot of undiagnosed problems and trauma of her own that created a pressure pot of issues. After I was born, she suffered through full on post-partum psychosis that nearly ended about as well as that sentence implies it could have. She was incredibly violent, controlling, and cruel for years. My sister went no-contact with her the second she turned 18. A significant event occurred that eventually spurned her into seeking real treatment that lasted for years. It's still ongoing.

My sister is also still no contact and I support her decision 100%. Those are her wounds and what she needed to do to get peace should be respected. I decided I wanted a relationship with the person who came out of all that work and, even then, it's been hard. I don't know if she's redeemed herself, and my god do we still have bumps in the road, but I support her for trying.

With Wilbur, how he responds to this is going to really impact a lot of things. I mean, I know no matter how he responds I won't be going on whatever journey of redemption and healing he has to go through. I'm tired and I feel hurt enough. I would think, if he wanted to show he was sincere, admitting what happened would be a great sense of closure for a lot of people who put time and energy and faith into this guy for years.

Not every person that causes harm is inherently evil, but there has to be some kind of knowledge that you're aware of the harm you've caused. No one is stuck as anything forever, life is constantly moving, and most people aren't saying his life is just over. You can work on yourself. You can change. And I'm saying that specifically to you, anonymous.

(Saying this, actually, there ARE people who would argue once you've done x you're beyond redemption based entirely on their life experiences as a victim, personal histories and many other factors. Kinda like my sister, that's their choice. And you have to accept that sometimes you fuck up so badly that you will permanently lose some people from your life. But your life isn't over.)

But I do think, regardless of what he says or does about this, his time of controlling a large platform is at an end. He can still do a lot of things in his life after he works on himself -- editing, song producing, directing, writing or whatever -- but being in charge of a large impressionable audience that could enable more destructive behaviors is just not it.

[avalonia320]

IWTV Thoughts

I finally got to watch the finale last night and when I tell you I am SHOOK to my damn core. I don't know how to put it into words. I'm older than a lot of people here. I first read the Vampire Chronicles when I was 11; I found them in a box that belonged to my mother. When I tell you I devoured those books, re-read them over and over and over, fell in love with Lestat and New Orleans & Paris, cried over Claudia and Louis...I was totally besotted by the world Anne Rice created.

When the movie was announced when I was a teen (yes I'm that old), first I was so excited and then I was furious, as many of us Anne Rice devotees were, when Tom Cruise was cast as Lestat. I could not imagine an actor further away from how I had imagined Lestat. But still, I had to see it, and while it was still miles away from what I had wanted, I came away impressed with Tom Cruise. He still wasn't my Lestat, but he threw himself into the role in a way that made me believe he'd been waiting his whole life to let his inner Queen off the chain.

The movie itself...I had loved parts of it, but there was still so much more that I wanted. When the sequel came out (Queen of the Damned) I liked parts of that too and I actually enjoyed Stuart Townsend as Lestat. I hated most of it though, especially what they did with Marius (to this day I don't know what the hell that was about) but it was obvious at that point that I was never going to see the vampire world I was so enthralled with on the screen.

Then this series comes out. And while my expectations were low, I was still pretty excited. And then I watched it.

Holy fucking shitballs, you guys. I am normally so protective of my favorite books, resenting any little change unless it makes sense but everything they've done with this series, everything they've changed makes so much fucking sense. I don't want to try and break it down, I don't have the words. Lestat was always my big love in the books, but in this series, I've fallen in love with Louis and Claudia in a way I never imagined. I always loved their characters, don't get me wrong, but I never connected with them this way until now. And don't even get me started on Daniel, who I will admit I actively disliked in the books for the unforgivable crime of being boring. Um....that's a word I will never ever use in connect to Daniel Molloy ever ever ever again. And Armand and Madeleine and...I can't.

And Lestat. I loved him in the first season but in the second season, when he showed up with that long hair, I saw him for the first time like someone took the Lestat that has lived in my head since I was 11 years old and put him on the screen. He is EXACTLY how I imagined him. The way he looks, the way he talks, his emotion, his breakdowns, his unbelievable flair for the dramatic...this is HIM. I feel like I've been been unconsciously waiting decades for him to show up and for people to see him the way I saw him back then. I can't be the only old school fan that feels this way. It's just so surreal to see it so exact, it takes me right back to my childhood and the way I fell into stories then. The way you feel things when you're so young is something so hard to recapture but I feel like I'm right back there again on my bed, reading the books over and over again.

I'm just so grateful. To everyone involved with this series, the writers, the cast...I know i'm getting overly emotional but everything's been so shit lately and we've all needed an escape, a good one for once. I needed this so badly.

And I have to believe, wherever she is now, Anne Rice is so fucking proud.

[samwinchesterswifu]

Linger pt 2 (Sam Winchester x Reader Angst) (Dean Winchester x Reader Smut)

Season 4 x Episode 22 - Lucifer Rising

Song Inspo: "Linger" by The Cranberries & "Magic Man" by Heart

Warnings: uh smut, p in v (wrap it up), uhm really fucking emotional? Uses of she/her prounouns and women body parts <3

MINORS DNI

A/N: holy. fucking. shit. this is my LONGEST fan fic EVER. im so damn proud of myself. Only took me 2 days to write. Now this isnt an exact episode re-write but there are like 3 scenes from the episode in here and I tried to change up the dialog a little bit so it wasnt exactly copy paste. I truly do love this story. please dont be mad at me lol. but uh yeah more than likely pt 3 coming soon.

Word Count: 3.767k

Summary: Sam goes off with Ruby to stop the seals from breaking, what can she do in the mean time?

She sits on the edge of  Bobby’s couch. Her left foot tapping away as she begins to chew her fingers in anticipation. Dean had found him, and instead of her coming along with him, Dean felt it was best for her to stay behind incase things got out of control. The old farm house was deafeningly quiet. Bobby had gone off to calm down after recovering from the shot-gun hit, leaving her alone. It must’ve been around two, or three am but she didn’t care. Sleep was a second thought. What felt like years swimming in her own personal hell, the familiar roar of the Impala pulls into the graveled drive finally separating from her thoughts. She rises from her position and makes her way outside. As she opens the door, Dean is climbing out of the Impala. A serge of panic rises through her once seeing his beat up face. She races down the steps grabbing onto his chin to inspect. Dean groans at the contact.

“What the hell happened?” She asked sternly.

“We got into it.” Dean states rolling his eyes as she continued to examine.

“No shit,” she replies, a snicker sharp on her tongue.

 Dean grabs a hold of her wrist stopping her from further jerking his head back and forth. He sighs and locks eyes with her.

“What Dean?” She asks bluntly annoyed by his grasp.

“He was with Ruby.” Dean states as his eyes shift to an apologetic glow underneath the tall street light that loomed over them.

“Figures,” she scoffs, breaking away from Dean’s grip.

She takes a step back from him, wiping her palms against the rough fabric of her jeans.

“I told him not to come back.” Dean spats out.

Her head shoots up to look at him.

“You did WHAT?” She exclaims. Her fists clench, wanting so badly to add to the poor guys face.

“You heard me.” Dean states, arms crossing over his chest.

“You can’t just make that decision for the both of us!” She screams, and pushes him sharply, enough for him to stumble.

“Well I did! You listen to me, he’s not good for you, I’m so sick and tired of watching you be drunk off him when all he does is treat you like shit!” Dean yells at her. Leaving her completely dumbfounded.

“And what gives you the fucking authority to make that decision for me huh?” She raises her voice to match his, stepping toe-to-toe, staring him down.

In a split second, Dean’s hands where cuffing her cheeks and he brings her in for a searing kiss. His lips where sweet but salty, the faint taste of copper mixing in, presumably from the cut on his bottom lip. After a few seconds, she realizes that she was in fact kissing Dean and pulls away. Her hands rested on his shoulders. She looks at him completely shocked. But deep down, she liked it. It was nice to finally have some sort of human connection. At this point, she wasn’t sure if Sam would ever be back in her life and if he would love her enough to be with her. Weighing her options, she reconnects her lips to Deans.

They battle for dominance, teeth clashing as she plays with the hair on the nape of his neck. Dean groans as she tugs on his strands. His sounds leaving her breathless and needy. Dean breaks contact and begins to travel kisses across her cheek, and down her neck. Nibbling harshly at a spot below her ear that made her squirm. His hands traveled down her sides and he taps the curve underneath her ass. Realizing his signal, she jumps. Wrapping her legs tightly against his waist as he holds her steady. Dean reconnects their lips as he begins to walk. But not towards the house. She breaks contact for a brief moment to see where he was headed. He was headed towards the shop.

She locks eyes with Dean. Her gut screaming about whether or not this was the right decision. In this moment, she truly didn’t care. In this moment, Dean seemed like the perfect treat. His features shined against the moonlight and his green eyes were electrified. Her head was spinning by the power Dean seemed to hold at this moment. Maybe, just maybe, Dean could take care of her, treat her right. And that maybe was what she held on to.

She reconnects their lips as they enter the shop. Dean holds her with one arm as he pushes the shop door partially closed. Never once breaking their kiss. He walks her over to shop couch, pushing off the blanket that laid on the seat and some wrenches. They break away as he lays her down. Quickly discarding his shirt on the floor in the process. She does the same and Dean just stares at her.

“Fuck,” he whispers. Taking in her glow. Bobby had left on one of the lamps that were hanging over one of the current cars on the jacks. It was just enough light for them to see each other.

Dean dips down, pulling her breast into his mouth. His mouth was warm and inviting. Moaning at the contact that she didn’t even know she craved. His right hand engulfed her right breast as his tongue played with her left nipple. She squirms against him as soft mewls of pleasure leave her lips. After he seems satisfied with himself, he leans back from her chest. Dean toys with the button of her jeans, after struggling for a bit, he pulls them off gracefully. Groaning at the sight in front of him.

“I don’t know how anyone can pass you up,” he says licking his lips.

A deep blush forms across her cheeks. Its been so long hearing any sort of praise and her soul was being replenished.

As Dean starts to fumble with his belt, she reaches up to help him. Unzipping his jeans, she pushes down his boxers to find him fully erect. She expected Dean to have some length to him, but fuck was he girthy. She wraps her hand around him, slowly pumping. Dean dips his head back in pleasure. She picks up her pace, wiping the pre-cum from his tip to help with the friction. A moan leaves Dean’s lips as she does this and the heat in her core becomes unbearable. She stops, and Dean looks at her completely blissed out from just the slightest touch.

Dean looks at her as if to ask she was okay with this, and if she was ready. She nods and Dean takes a quick moment to kick off his jeans. He places himself back in between her legs and pushes aside her underwear. Dean grabs on to her hips and aligns himself with her. She grabs onto his bicep as he begins to push inside. Both of them seething at the contact. Her grip tightens as he stretches her earning a groan from the man. Dean is slow with it, inching closer and closer until he was completely inside. Both of them moaning at the feeling. She felt so full that it was making her dizzy.

Once allowing her a few moments to adjust to his length, Dean unleashes a brutal attack. His thrust start off fast and hard. Her moans fill up the shop and she prayed that no one was outside to hear her. Dean was a god, he moved exactly the right away and kept his pace steadily. Her first orgasm came within minutes. The second one falling behind shortly after.

“Fuck, you feel so fucking, goo-“ Dean grunts. Being cut off with his own thrust.

The opposite hand from holding himself steady rose and grasped around her throat. This fucking man knew how to choke someone. The pressure from his grasp makes her third orgasm more violent than the first. Her moans turned into screams as he just continued on his attack.  A fourth and fifth orgasm rippled through her bones. Her eyes swelled with tears at the immense amount of pleasure she was being supplied.

However, Dean’s thrust became more and more unstable. He was close and she wanted to milk every last drop out of him.

“Cum in me, please,” she grasps out in between moans.

Dean looks at her bewildered by her request but nods.

“Okay, okay, fuck-“ Dean thrusts a few more times before he fills her up completely. His orgasm bringing on her final one at the same time.

Both of them sit there for a moment, Dean was still inside of her as they catch their breaths. Their eyes lock for a moment and both let out a small laugh. Dean slowly pulls out of her, both moaning at the loss of contact. Dean takes a moment before grabbing his and her pants from the floor tossing them to her. Slipping them on, she grabs her discarded shirt and throws it back on as Dean does the same. She was completely wiped by this point. She yawns, and Dean takes note of it. Grabbing the shop blanket that was thrown about, he motions behind her. Surprised by his actions, she allows Dean to settle behind her as he throws the shop blanket across them. He stretches out his right arm to allow her to use it as a pillow as his left arm lays across her waist. She snuggles close to him and starts to drift to sleep feeling protected.

The morning sun peaks through the crack of the shop door, shining just right to stir her from slumber. She blinks her eyes open, looking around to figure out her surroundings as last night’s memories play back. She notices that Dean was no longer behind her and no where in the shop to be found. She sighs, tossing the shop blanket to the side and makes her way back towards the house, seeing Bobby’s car back in the drive. She groans at the thought of having to explain herself to Bobby. But as she gets closer to the house she can hear yelling from inside.

“Don’t make me get my gun boy,” Bobby’s voice of retribution laces through the hallways as she makes her way inside. It was unsettling to hear Bobby stern.

“We are damn near kick off for Armageddon, don’t you think we got bigger fish to fry?” she can hear Dean state from the living room as she makes her presence known. Both men looking towards her as she does so.

“Where the hell have you been?” Bobby asks sternly, arms crossing over his chest.

“I, uh-“ she stutters, pointing towards the door, unsure of how to explain she fell asleep in the shop.

Dean looks up at her innocently, shaking his head as if to say to not say a damn word.

“Never mind.” Bobby huffs.

She gulps, her throat stuffed with anxiety.

“I know you’re pissed, and I’m not making apologies for what he’s done, but he’s your-“

“Blood? He’s my blood, is that what you’re gunna say?” Dean cuts Bobby and he sighs in response.

“He’s your brother.” Bobby states,

“And he’s drowning,” the old man sighs looking between the both of them. Nodding his head towards Dean’s direction to try to get her to weigh in on the situation.

“Maybe Bobbys right Dean, he needs our help.” She chimes in, a groan leaving Dean’s lips at her response.

“I tried to help him Y/N, I already did.” Dean replies.

“So try again.” Bobby rebuttals. However he takes notes of how uneasy Dean had became once she entered the house.

“Did something happen between you two?” Bobby asks, looking at Dean. Dean shoots her a panicked look as Bobby shoots a glare towards her.

“No, no- we’re fine,” she comments. Bobby makes a soft “uh huh” under his breath clearly not believing them.

“it’s too late-“ Dean states as he strides towards the stair case.

“There’s no such thing,” Bobby says trying any way he can to get Dean to calm down.

“No, damn it!” Dean shouts. He was evidently annoyed by this whole conversation.

“No.” He sighs, the man was stubborn  she’d give him that.

“Look, we got to face the facts. Sam never wanted to be apart of this family. He hated our life growing up. Ran away to school first chance he got. Now it’s like Déjà VU all over again.” Dean shifts on the edge of his heels as he leans down to sit on the couch behind him.

“Well I am sick and tired of chasing after him, you should be too.” Dean pauses, point directly at her.

“Screw him, he can do what he wants.” Dean sneers.

“You don’t mean that-“ Bobby starts before getting cut off again by Dean.

“Yes I do Bobby,” he sighs. “Sammy’s gone.”

“I’m not even sure if he’s still my brother anymore. If ever was,” Dean’s voice cracks at the pain. A deep look forms over his eyes, a sad one. It hurt her to see him so distraught over Sam, because she was too.

Bobby pushes himself off his desk, pacing back and forth before suddenly throwing everything off of it.

“You stupid, stupid son of a bitch!” Bobby yells and Dean rises to meet him. She backs away from them honestly a bit scared from the interaction.

“Well boohoo! I am so sorry your feelings are hurt princess! Are you under the impression that family supposed to make you feel good? Bake you an apple pie maybe? They’re supposed to make you miserable! That’s why they’re family!” Bobby screams, stomping his foot in frustration.

“I told him that if he walked out that door to not come back, and that’s what he did Bobby!” Dean yells back, walking past him as his fist clenches.

“You sound like a brat-“ Bobby mocking in his response.

“No,” Dean whispers coming near her, and his back facing Bobby. Unsure of how to comfort him in the moment.

“You sound like John. Well let me tell you something, John was a coward.” Bobby states.

“You are a better man than your daddy ever was.” Bobby replies, Dean snickers in bewilderment.  

“Don’t be him.” Bobby’s words cut through her. Growing up around John Winchester taught her a lot about how not to be a family and she was starting to regret pushing Sam away.

She could see Dean thinking, and he looks to her with pleading eyes begging for help in those moment. She shook her head, and dean scoffed again turning to face Bobby when suddenly he was gone.

“Dean?!” She screeches, her voice cracking in the process. Both her and Bobby looking frantically around the house.

“Oh, balls!” Bobby yells, kicking the side of his desk.

But just as suddenly Dean disappeared, Castiel stood before her.

“Hello Y/N,” Castiel greets her, looking towards Bobby giving him a nod.

“Where the hell is Dean Castiel!” She asks ready to take on the angel in front of her.

“We have him, it’s almost time.” Castiel bluntly replies.

“We? You mean the angels have him?” She asks a new wave of panic sifts through her blood stream.

“Yes, we have him, don’t worry he’s safe.” Castiel states. Before she could respond Castiel was gone again.

She screams in frustration, grabbing the nearest book and tossing it in the direction where the angel once stood.

“Here,” Bobby says tapping her shoulder and handing her a glass of whiskey.

“Thanks,” she responds. Taking in a heaping swig to off set her nerves.

Setting down the cup, she lays down on the closest couch stretching her legs out and sighing at todays events.

“So, what happened between you two?” Bobby asks again this time really letting on that he needed to know.

“I did something stupid Bobby.” She replies reaching over to the cup of whiskey taking another sip before continuing.

“Dean and I slept together.” She blurts out. Groaning at the thought of last night.

“You did what?” Bobby asks, a sliver of disbelief hanging on his tongue.

“Yeah, last night, in your- in your shop.” She grunts out. Letting out another huff in embarrassment.

“You stupid stupid girl! Seriously! Dean of ALL people?” Bobby yells making her jump at his sudden voice raise.

“I know Bobby-“ She starts before getting cut off.

“I don’t think you understand woman, if Sam finds and he will, he’s gunna be pissed.” Bobby snickers taking back the cup that he had previously handed to her. A quick ‘hey!’ at his action leaves her lips.

“What were you thinking?” Bobby sighs shaking his head at her.

“I was upset too Bobby, Sam’s made it evident that he doesn’t want to be with me.” She shrugs. Completely drained by everything that’s happened over the last 48 hours.

“He does want to be with you, you idjit.” Bobby tells her bluntly. Almost as if they were repeating the same conversation as before, but centered on her this time.

“No he doesn’t Bobby,” she responds, tears choking up her words as she fight back all the hurt she experienced because of the youngest Winchester.

“Yes he does Y/N, that kid is so madly in love with you he’s doing all of this for you- to give you a better world, I know his actions doesn’t seem it but that’s what he doing kiddo, for you.” Bobby says, handing her back the previously taken whiskey glass.

She lays there silently for a moment before taking another sip of the glass. She doesn’t respond to Bobby before sitting up and pushing her self off the couch. Grabbing her cellphone that laid on the side table, she makes her way outside. She walks around to the shop to get some privacy incase Bobby came looking.

Taking a deep breath, she calls Sam’s cellphone. After a few rings its sent to voice mail where she hesitates for a quick moment of what she was going to say.

“Sammy,” she starts, taking another deep breath before continuing.

“You don’t have to do this. Come back to Bobby’s please, we’ll figure out another way, you and me, come back to me, please. My sweet boy please, just come back to me.” She finishes the phone call.

Her heart ached, frustrated and annoyed with herself. How could she be so stupid and go behind Sam’s back like that? The sun was almost rested in the sky at this point in the evening, the moon peaking over the tower of cars that laid in the salvage yard. She decides to go back inside, wanting to distract herself with cooking something at the very least.

But as she turns around to start her way back, she is met with Castiel and Dean in front of her. Dean tries to say something before Castiel is grabbing her and before she can protest they were standing in front of the prophet Chuck.

“God damn it Cas!” She yells, stumbling, and trying to catch her balance.

“Oh this isn’t supposed to be happening-“ Chuck says while simultaneously on the phone.

“No- lady this is definitely supposed to be happening, but I uh, I gotta call you back.” Chuck says to the woman on the phone before disconnecting the call.

“St. Marys? What is that a convent?” Dean asks reading over the newly written Supernatural Script.

“Yeah but-but you guys aren’t supposed to be there.” Chuck responds. “You’re not in this story,” he finishes, completely flustered by their arrival.

“We’re making it up as we go.” Cas states. Dean looks between the angel and her, also confused by the angels actions. She shrugs at his glance.

Then, the familiar sound of angel static and bright lights fill the room.

“Oh no not this again!” Chuck groans, throwing his hands up in frustration.

“It’s the archangel!” Castiel screams over the sound.  A wave of panic flushes Dean’s features and he looks like he is a bout to pass out from the sheer rush of adrenaline.

“I’ll hold them off, just stop Sam!” Castiel yells, looking between her and Dean.

Touching both of them at the same time, they’re transported to a new location. Dean takes a moment to look around to realize that they’re at the convent. He grabs a hold of her hand and starts to walk down the hallway in front of them. The round a corner to find Sam and Ruby in the main chapel room with Lilith on  the ground. Ruby turns to look at the two and smirks. A deep scrawl forms on both of their faces, preparing to kill the demon bitch. With a flick of her wrist, Ruby closes the door on them.

Rushing to the door way, they both start to bang on the old wooden doors. Yelling his name at the top of their lungs. She pushes Dean out of the way and uses her whole body weight against the door to try to pry it open. She was desperate at this point, tears threatened to break loose from her lashes. Wanting nothing more than to save him.

“Move!” Dean yells. Turning around she see’s him holding a statue and she grabs a hold of it. The two of them ram the door open and Ruby turns to face them.  

Grabbing the demon knife from Dean’s pocket she strides towards Ruby.

“You’re too late.” Ruby laughs.

“I don’t care,” she snickers back.

Sam stands up quickly, grabbing a hold of  Rubys arms as she makes the final blow. Twisting the knife to make sure she was truly dead. Ruby starts to flash out, and sick smile forms on her lips as she watches.

Ruby finally drops dead and Sam pushes Ruby to the side. Sam takes a moment to look at her, and Dean before resting on her face.

“I’m sorry,” Sam chokes out.

He takes a step forward and his hands come to cuff her cheeks, bringing her in for a quick kiss. The ground beings to rumble as a bright light shoots from the center. This throws off their balance making her fall into Sam. Dean looks between the two of them, his words stuck on his throat unsure of what to say. They all three turn to look at the hole that was beginning to form. Dean grabs onto both of them frantically.

“Y/N, Sammy, lets go-“ Dean spats out. Sam grabs on to Dean, staring down the light.

“Dean?” Sammy asks and Dean looks to him concerned.

Sam chokes on broken tears.

“He’s coming-“

[letswrites]

Never be the same- C.L

Chapter 5: Monte Carlo living dream

I'm truly sorry for taking like an eternity to post the last chapter. It took me so long to finish this fic because a lot happened in my life. But I'm happy to be able to finish it in 2024 hehe Thanks for everything who supports my work and happy new year to everyone! Sorry again for the long wait, enjoy!

Disclaimer: there's a very lowkey smut!

Chapter 4

Masterlist

Monte Carlo, Monaco:

Il predestinato. People were calling Charles like that. Do you know why? Because he fucking  won the Monaco Grand Prix. He fucking did it! People could say it was destiny, prayer, magic, whatever, but for him it was her. She was the reason why he could do something like that. Since their relationship usually was shattered, broken and slightly toxic, he had been stressed, distracted, jealous and he blamed himself only. But since they opened their hearts to each other, things felt like it finally hit the honeymoon phase. He remembered that night in Italy, after the discussion, they escaped to a beach and laid there, just stargazing and talking about silly things. She was laying on his chest, holding his hand, making circles on it. And after they parted ways, she started to be more present with FaceTimes and sweet texts. She was even excited they would see each other. It was everything he wanted: peace of mind at her side. He was also happy for being the guy who made her dream come true, he took her to Monaco. And the way she smiled the whole time, just made it worth all the money he spent on it. And of course, when he was at the highest step of the podium he could see her face, she was so proud of him, anyone could tell. And he was so proud of himself. Things seemed to be unfolding perfectly, he felt so lucky.

When he finally could be with her, she opened her arms and jumped on him, hugging Charles tightly. “Oh my God, oh my God, I’m so proud of you” she mumbled in his ear “I did it, love. I did it” she couldn’t see his face, but she could  feel the tears in his voice “You are the predestinato” “I am the luckiest guy in the world” “Yes you are” “Cause I have you by my side. I race in these streets since I was… well, since when I can remember and I always was very close of winning but with you here for the 1st time, I finally did it” he hugged her again “Thank you” she could feel the tears burning her eyes “Thank you, Charles” he pulled away and kissed her, with all his strength, he didn’t care about the air missing in his lungs. He was so in love with that woman.

After this, all they could remember was partying. A lot. And drunk Charles speaking French formally again. The night was fun, but she was still jet lagged so she came back to his place, after a lot of insistence for her to stay, and slept like a rock.

…

May, 28th (the day after monaco gp):

"Good morning, mademoiselle! How does it feel waking up in Monaco?", she rubbed her sleepy eyes, he handed her with a orange juice glass, "Your juice", she grabbed the cup "Merci" she thanked before yawning, "You should know how it feels to wake up in Monaco you do it since always" he laughed " But what do you think?" "Very pleasant. Especially with this view "Are you talking about me?" she giggled "The sea, Charles" he smiled “Are you hungover?” she asked “Me?” she nodded “No! I’m great” “You drank a lot last night. I think I saw you throwing up” he blushed “I’m better now” “Good!” "Would you like to go out for a boat ride?" "Boat?" "A yacht, actually, and some jet skis" she laughed sarcastically "A yacht and some jet skis" "What? What is the problem?" "Nothing... Forget about it" "'Come on! What’s wrong about the yacht" "Nothing, Charles. Is just... I’m not used to this lifestyle" she shrugged "You’re not" He smirked "But do you want to become? I can make it become your reality as well" she blushed "I don’t know" she sipped her juice “Maybe” he smiled and placed a hand on her cheek "You are so cute" she gently took his hand off her cheek "You still haven't answered my question" she bit her inner cheek, unsure "I can teach you how to drive the jet ski" he offered "I'm in" he smiled "Good. Go change then" "Ok, monsieur"

…

Later:

Once they were far away from the dock, where it was safe to drive the jet ski, Charles helped her to wear the life jacket, making sure it was secure. "Are you ready?"  "Not really” she laughed, he smiled “Well, that's now or never”. She let out a deep breath as she got on the jet ski feeling unsure if what she was about to do or the feeling of him behind her with his hands hovering her waist was what made her feel butterflies in her stomach "Is this okay?” he asked permission to touch her. She turned her head back, nodded and smiled at him. He placed his hands on the warm skin and his head over her right shoulder. He was so close she could smell his peppermint breath and male cologne, which probably would impregnate in her body. Thank God. She shivered with the thoughts and the feelings while he started to explain about the engine and other mechanical things. She didn't understand any of those so she turned her face to him, inches from his face. And mouth. He paused, then gulped "What?" "I ain't a motor vehicles nerd as you are, can you teach me something actually useful?" He focused on her lips "Charles?" "Sure!" She gave him a tight lipped smile. He cleaned his throat "Sorry... Hum, so here's where you turn on the engine" he showed her making her miss his touch "Here accelerate and for braking you just stop to accelerate" she giggled "it makes sense" he smiled "It does indeed. And for guiding and turning you simply do that" he placed his hands on the handles giving her his warmth again and showed her what he just had said "That's it. Now it's on you" "I can't do that" "Yes, you can" "Charles" she turned her face to him again "I’m afraid" he smiled softly with emphatic eyes, her innocence in that moment awakened some primitive male instinct on him that he only wished to keep her safe at all costs. 

“Follow me" he whispered in her ear as he turned the jet ski on. She looked at him perplexed "Come on! Put your hands over mine" she did it and instantly felt her face getting warm as felt her skin in touch his again. After lots of giggles and making a few circles and random draws in the water she finally got some confidence, "Can I let go now?” he asked and she agreed to soon realize she was doing that by herself. And that she was good at it. His hands found her waist again, holding on it firmly when she sped up riding the jet ski as she never had fear before "I thought you were afraid" He teased "Me? How could I be afraid of something fun like that?" She smiled, he laughed "I told you". 

When she stopped the jet ski near Sedici and turned off the engine, she sighed ecstatic from the adrenaline. "Have you enjoyed it?" "Yeah. Can we do this again?" He laughed "Of course. Can I drive now?" "Oh... That's fine I can enjoy having an excuse for keeping my hands on your abs" "I can find a couple of reasons if you want to" "Can you?" "Yeah" he squeezed her waist, lightly "And if I can't, I simply make them up" their voice tones changed. It was low, sexy and she couldn't help but feel turned on "Fuck" she mumbled "Yeah, fuck" "Can we take it as its literal meaning?" "Yes, we can" his hands slid to her hips, rubbing it back and forth, their lips hovered, eyes were almost closed. She smiled "Charles" and broke the moment "Hum?" He grumbled, disappointed "I'm hungry" he opened his eyes. She had a childish semblance and he couldn't help but feel funny. How could he be angry at her? "I cook for you" he said softly, caressing her hair "Thank you" they kept eye contact, his hands still on her hips "Let’s go, then. Food won’t be cooked by itself" "Hold on!" He didn’t move an inch "Hum?" "Come here" she asked for the incomplete kiss, which he gave to her, melting into her lips, feeling her tongue dance along with his, "Am I your appetizer, now?" She laughed "Nooo! You taste way better" He laughed "Alright, let’s go, I’m hungry too" he stepped out of the jet ski, then helped her to do the same. 

…

A few minutes later:

He was laying on the floor of Sedici, he made pasta for them to eat and now she rested her head on his chest while Charles caressed her hair. “You know what?”, he started, “Hum?” "We could go out for dinner tomorrow" "Dinner?" "Yeah. You know, going out to eat at night", she giggled "I know what dinner means, silly! I want to know what you have in mind" "Hum, I'm not sure...." he mumbled, "So how can you invite me to dinner?" "Can I think for a second?!", he said impatiently but without being angry or disrespectful, "Alright" "I’m sorry", he paused "We can have Mediterranean. What do you think?" "Seafood?" "We can have oysters and risotto, or grilled salmon with potatoes sauteed in butter and… cake! For dessert. What do you think?", his eyes pleaded for a 'yes' but she was tough. She looked at Charles with a disgusted face, "Oysters?" "No oysters, then" "Ok, but… cake for dessert?" "Don't you like cake?" "Not my favorite thing but kinda like a few flavors" "What's your favorite?" "Can you guess?" he thought a little, looking at her face as it would magically reveal the answer, "Chocolate?" "Charles! No! Think a little more" "I don't know. I thought it was chocolate cake" "It's not" "Which is, then?" " "My favorite cake is lemon cake. Or a good strawberry shortcake" he smiled warmly, without showing his teeth, “You have good taste" she smiled, "Also for men" he blushed “You’re lovely” “Thanks”” "Do you rather which dessert, then?" "Ice cream!" "Loved it! So, do we have a date?" "Yes, dinner it's fine" he smiled, fully, finally they were on the same page. "Good", he mumbled more to himself than to her as his personal conquest. "8 is fine?" "To be sure, 8 PM, right?" "Yeah" "So we have a date, monsieur Lorde Percival" "I’m already excited" "I can see that", she referred to his boner. He looked down "Oh! Don't look at that" "Why not?" "Don't want you to feel like you have to do it", he said trying to hide it with his swimming shorts. 

The truth was he spent all day with her wearing tiny bikinis right in front of him, also he couldn’t stop thinking about their kiss and since the last time they had sex he couldn’t enjoy it too much he would really love if she felt the obligation to do something, but he was gentleman and if she didn’t want to suck his cock, he would never be able to force her. "My own wishes aren't an obligation" "Come one! You don't have to" she lifted her body and leaned over him, "The real thing here it's what does a girl have to do to have some sex this evening?". He lifted his upper body, resting on the elbows, "Sex between you and me?" "Do you see any other people here?" "No, but...", he looked at her, was he really going to let her think he was afraid of not completing the job again? No! Because he wasn't. So he smiled, "First you have to kiss me", she smirked, before giving him a breathtaking kiss, "Then, what?" "I take your bikini and my swimming shorts off" "Ok… and after it?" "We make love… like ten times", she laughed "Ten times?! I don't think that’s good for the health", he smiled and kissed her face, "We can make pauses", she giggled with the kisses, "It sounds good to me", he kissed her neck, "To me too", then stopped at her chin before pulling away to stare at her, inches from her lips, "Should I?" "Please" he moved forward to kiss her. 

His hand moved from her waist to her back slowly, to untie the top of her bikini. His fingers ran up her spine to her neck to repeat the process with the other knot. She shivered when the breeze touched her bare chest, Charles pulled her body to be on top of his, feeling her hard nipples against his chest, ���I’m going to warm you” “Please”, they said in between wet kisses and cutted breaths. She bucked her hips down against his hard dick, making the Monegasque groan, “Fuck…”, he cursed. As the kiss deepened, their bottom clothes were thrown somewhere on the yacht’s floor, till there was nothing in between their bodies. 

Charles had his back flat on the floor while she was riding his dick, he watched her tits bounce up and down and her facial expression shifting when she found a new sensitive spot that his member hit. Soon they both hit their orgasms and her body collapsed down against his. They stood like that for a few minutes, catching their breaths, till she had a mischievous idea, “Charles” “Yes?” “Since we’re both naked…” ‘What?” “What do you think about skinny dipping?” “Skinny dipping!?” “Yes” “But what if someone sees us?” “It's dark already, c’mon”. She stood up and walked to the edge of the yacht. He watched her ass and her curves as she moved, before she looked back at him, “Come on!” “Are you sure?” “I’m. If you don’t want to join me, I’ll just go by myself”, she said before jumping in the water, “Fuck!”, he cursed, he couldn’t let her go by herself. He stood up and followed her steps to jump into the water too. She watched as he did and cheered up, “Yes! I knew you would come”, he came back to the surface and swam toward her, wrapping his arm around her waist when he did. “Only you to make me do something like that”, she giggled while he spinned her around, “But the sensation is good, isn’t it?”, he stopped spinning and looked at her, “It’s quite good, yes”, she smiled before holding on his shoulders and confessing, “I love you” “I love you too”, he said, “I love you forever”, he completed before taking her lips on his and they started to make out in the water. With her by his side, he was never going to be the same again.

[kerubimcrepin]

Wakfu OVA - Book 2, Ush [PART 1]

Bonta my beloved...

From these two shots we can see the approximate location of the Crepin-Jurgen residence.

Atcham is, for some reason, the first one at the door. Maybe he's been walking a polite "I don't know those two" distance away from Kerubim and Joris. Idk.

[guy who misses liveblogging Dofus and pointing random things out voice] Here Luis says that it took Joris, Kerubim, and Atcham three months to get the Dofus. I wonder what this means.

DFHGSDFGOASIDKFJSADGKDFHAO;SFHSADJFHAOSUDFHSADJKFHJASDKFHASDJFHASJDFHUSAIDFHASJDKFSDF

Catboy Joris agenda continues to rise.

Two of the silliest things here are an unopened letter that has a chunk of it torn off (unopened for 3 months, mind you), and the lute with two broken strings.

...I really want to see that picture on the wall fully. What does it depict. Hi what does it depict. Hello.!

Judging from the legs, I think it might be Atcham in promiscuous clothes. Literally idk though.

I love you, Luis.

(Random stack of four pillows and a little stool with a bucket and a bowl on it in the corner there. They may or may not have left home midway through cleaning...., or something.)

SFDAJDKSLFJSDHASOUDFHCNSAJDKFHJKASLDFHKJASDFHJAKSDFHKAJSDFASDJFH

They ARE rude, Luis. Kill them! Kill them!

I think Atcham is the only one who is brave enough to say this out loud because Luis has a history of being scared shitless of him.

It is no longer the case after 600 years — he lives here, after all, — but he is still the least likely to get beaten by a floorboard in his sleep for running his mouth.

No comment.

This — the cookies/whatever, and tea in a kettle, — leads me to believe there's a tiny timeskip between them going to the basement, and them getting the map and the Dofus out, and that during said timeskip they had tea and cookies.

Also, I find it so funny that they have three little chairs, and the only one using a chair is Kerubim... to stand taller. While Atcham is literally just sitting on the table.

Very important lore. Truly.

This map is., 200 years out of date. And it was created before the Ogrest's Chaos.. When most of the world wasn't, y'know... flooded.

They're so grandpas... This is so fucking funny I can't.

Also, they couldn't find more than one nail to hold it down, so it seems someone (probably Atcham) just pierced it with a dagger. dfhgjsdfg.

He;s so cute.... i need him to be hit by a car.

Atcham is so glad to have finished this quest... In my opinion, he turns to Joris to say this, because Joris has been worried the entire way back. However, it doesn't help much.

You see, I am insane about this entire exchange. I'm crazy. THIS is why I love the OVAs: they allow us a brief, but very important glimpse into Joris, Kerubim and Atcham's life in Wakfu era.

Joris is weighed down by the morally questionable things he does. Even if it is a "good thing", he isn't proud of it. He's scared they'll hate him, and he's scared that it's a step out of his lane.

However, Kerubim is the one who justifies his and Joris's morally questionable actions. He justifies them through an appeal to the authority of the king, and an appeal to the morality of it.

And he does all of it the second he sees Joris hesitate or be uncomfortable in any way, shape, or form.

He's been doing this for 600 years. This is so unserious.

He just interrupts and disregards everything Joris says, as if Joris is insane for thinking these things... and in a way, he is right — Adamai and Yugo do forgive Joris, who seems to have been agonizing about them being mad at him...

I think Joris overthinks things a lot and starts to panic easily, and Kerubim knows that, and knows how to stop him from doing that.

Besides Kerubim demonstrating that here, he also demonstrates that, really, despite role-playing as their dad, Joris doesn't have the highest authority in this household.

Btw, Kerubim is so very good at chilling when things are actually catastrophically bad, that in my opinion his "this is literally so easy. this is going to be okay. papycha will protect you." may or may not be one of the main contributing factors to Joris doing war crimes in Waven, instead of going insane from panic. Family who war crimes together, stays together.

[cairavende]

Worm Arc 8 thoughts:

. . . . .

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!

WHAT THE FUCK! WHERE DO I EVEN START? WHAT DO I EVEN SAY?

I just. I . . . WHAT?!?

Ok I'm just diving in, it's probably gonna be chaotic (hey, just like the Endbringer fight!)

Someone needs to give Scion like, a beeper. Get a tinker on that to make it an extra good one. Maybe it should be in bracelet form so he can't lose it? Fuck it, just give him an ankle monitor as well so we know where he is at all times.

I adore the shit out of Dragon and really wish she didn't run a fucking prison so I could like her even more.

Legend is not great at the pre battle pep talk. He doesn't lie to them sure, but that sure doesn't seem to help moral at all. Sometimes you just gotta go "lets fucking do this!" and start punching gods ugly middle child.

Seriously, he just keeps bringing the mood down. They probably shouldn't have let him do this after his villain "not boyfriend" died fighting an Endbringer, it clearly tore this man apart. (No this is not canon as far as I know and I don't expect it to be. But I took this "I have seen too many good heroes,” he paused for a fraction of a second, “And villains, too, die because they let their guard down." and just fucking ran with it. He paused cause he was chocked up because his rival that had incredible sexual tension with him got killed fighting an Endbringer. It's canon for me.)

Sucks to be Newfoundland I guess. Or sucked. Cause it ain't there no more.

I wonder if we get full death numbers for all the Endbringer attacks ever. Or even just how many attacks there have been. Obviously Kyushu and Newfoundland were extreme causality events. But Kyushu was Leviathans 6th attack, so they had at least started to learn how things work. It seems like the first few Endbringer attacks would have been massive. I dunno, I like numbers and I'm curious.

The fight holy shit it just keeps going. Everyone is fucking dying and it just keeps going. Skitter is doing her best in all of it and I'm proud of her. Providing medical aid when she can't figure out what else to do. She's a good egg. Look for the helpers.

Tattletale just gets washed off a roof and I have to spend the rest of the fucking arc waiting to learn if she is ok! I was worried about my baby! Not Skitter, my other baby. No not Bitch, the third baby.

Early on I said "throw Clockblocker at him". And while that didn't exactly happen I am glad that I had the right idea. Too bad they didn't use the timestop grenade after that instead of before though, could have just stuck him in time for a few years. Kicked the can down the road as it were.

Look at Skitter being the one to get someone to save Clockblocker too. Everyone is there but she is the only one that noticed he was drowning. She is very good at seeing the details. Saving his life is a fair trade for the whole bug thing at the bank.

At least a lot of the Nazis croaked during the fight. That's a small bonus.

Of fucking course Magic Stick Batman tried to plan this all so he gets to have the big final fight and be the hero. Let a bunch of people die to do so. No surprise at all, this guy has been an asshole since day 1.

On the note of him though, more like "Armmaster" now! Eh? Ehhhhhhh? Cause, cause see, Leviathan ripped off his arm. So now he only has one arm. Instead of two. An 'arm' instead of 'arms'. See? You get it.

AND THEN WE GET SKITTER GOING BACK IN TO THE SHELTER TO FIGHT LEVIATHAN 1 ON 1 TO SAVE CIVILIANS. "Which left me only one thing to do.  I had to be better than Mr. Gladly." FUCKING LOOK AT HER! LOOK AT MY AMAZING DAUGHTER! SHE IS THE BEST OF US!

AND THEN SHE TORE LEVIATHAN A NEW ASSHOLE! LITERALLY!

And then he just fucking breaks her back and she starts to drown.

AND THEN! AND THEN AND THEN!!! AAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! FUCKING BITCH! BITCH PULLS HER OUT OF THE WATER RIGHT BEFORE SHE DROWNS! JUST COMES OUT OF NOWHERE AND SAVES HER GIRLFRIENDS LIFE!!!!!!! AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

And then all the dogs die. And I got very sad. And very mad.

Fucking Scion finally shows up, the last two dogs die after he gets here but he doesn't really try to move fast enough to save them. I spent like 10 minutes just swearing up a fucking storm at this guy for not coming sooner. I'm pretty sure the Endbringers are his fault anyway. Fuck this prick.

And after all this Skitter has to deal with being cuffed up in a hospital! WTF guys. Rude.

I really feel like they should just pass some laws to prevent capes from suing hospitals during events like this so the hospital staff can actually talk to people. Seems like it would make things a shit ton easier.

Panacea is in love with her fucking sister isn't she? God dammit girl. You are definitely going to end up as a villain and a really fucked up one too.

I fucking LOVE that Taylor escaped the handcuffs by using her bugs to get a key and everything! She is so fucking clever, I love the shit out of her.

Sophia is Shadow Stalker I FUCKING CALLED IT! FUCKING HA! (See Arc 6 thoughts). Also more proof that the heroes are shitheads.

I loved watching Tattletale absolutely god damn CLOWN on Armmisser. Uses his password to get priority access. Just completely reveals all the shit he pulled. Fucking Legend laser blasts him when he tries to attack her, amazing. I will never not love to see this man get clowned on.

BABIES BREAKING UP? EVEN IF JUST FOR A CHAPTER? NO!! BABIES BE FRIENDS FOREVER!

The dogs names carved into the monument. Just. Fuck. I cried. A lot. They were the bestest puppies. They were brave. They were strong. They were good. They mattered.

Interlude 1 thoughts - I loved getting some Lisa PoV. She is possibly my favorite and getting to see her power from her perspective was fun.

Interlude 2 thoughts - Coil is a horrible horrible human. I've established that. But oh my god I would read an entire book from the perspective of someone with his power. I love the shit out of powers and abilities like that I dunno. Just my absolute favorite.

[workingforthewidow]

5:34 am I was about to start my day-

I’m alive lol! Sorry for the long wait but I’m here I’m alive. Just had to get over the flu, dizzy spells, and salmonella poisoning lol. Here is part 8 of Sun to Me! I have part 9 done as well and maybe 10 done/almost done!

This story is NSFW and not for minors- if you are under 18 go ask your legal guardian if you can watch the movie.

Warnings: kidnapping, forced marriage, dub-con, attempted non-con, abuse, Stockholm syndrome, age gap (15 years- K&C are 19 Sinclairs are freshly 34) Don’t like it don’t read it,

Sun to Me Masterlist

“Fucking hell. Where the fuck did they go?” Bo ran his hands through his hair as he paced. He had tried to keep up with the girls and the visitors but lost them when they took a turn. “Those fucking little bitches. Can’t believe they fucking tricked us. I don’t care how pretty they are, I’m going to beat her with my bare hands.” His anger was at an all time high. It had been 3 hours and they couldn’t find the girls or the visitors.

Vincent had been sitting in the house watching Bo pace as he wrote out his thoughts-

~How are you so sure they are trying to run? These last two months have been good after that last attempt. Which was deserved after that stunt you pulled. Maybe the visitors took them. Thinking they were in danger. They’re on foot they couldn’t have gotten far.~

Bo winced reading the note. He didn’t like to remember what happened the day of his birthday. He would hate himself and what he did to Caroline for the rest of his life and even in the hereafter. He took a breath and closed his eyes trying to calm himself. He opened his mouth to say something when the door opened. He turned and the sight was something he never would have imagine in his wildest dreams.

There stood his babygirl, his little innocent wife who cried when she saw Jonesy kill a squirrel and had nightmares during thunderstorms, with blood splattered all over her face, her jeans, and the shirt she had stolen from his dresser, and a knife in her hand.

“I got one of them but Katie is still running over the girl. And boy is she’s mad. I don’t think I’ve seen Katie that mad in a while.” She said it like it was nothing. “I imagine if you want to be able to use the body you should get to her before Katie’s done with her.” She turned and started walking back in the direction where Bo assumed Katie and the victim were running.

Bo finally came out of the shock he was trapped in and ran after her, grabbing her around the waist. “The fuck you think you’re doing girl.” The anger was coming back into his body full speed.

“Obviously trying to get back to my sister before she completely destroys a human body. Duh.”

“Oh no. You are going to back up to that house, cleaning yourself up, and getting my dinner ready, like the good little wife you are suppose to be.” Bo turned and started walking her towards the house. “You are in so much trouble little girl.”

“And here I thought you would find it kinda hot or are you just jealous the guy I killed was bigger than yours.” Bo dropped her and turned her to face him his hands going to her face.

“The fuck you mean the one you killed?”

“I took this knife,” she held up the bloodied knife in his face, “and I stabbed him. Right here.” She tapped the tip of the blade over his heart. “I mean I did have him on the ground after I hit him in the head with a chair. But I’m still pretty proud of myself.” She shrugged and waited for a response.

Bo’s emotions were flipping so fast he didn’t know what to do. He felt anger at her for not following the rules, pride in her that she had taken down a tourist, and she was right he was insanely hard in his jeans at the sight of her. He let the third emotion take over and grabbed her face in his hands and kissed her hard.

“We will be having a long talk about this later little girl. Show us where they went.” He released her face and she started off in the direction Katie had run.

Bo and Vincent followed and soon they found Katie looking very similar to Caroline. The body of the woman at her feet.

At the sound of their footsteps Katie looked up, it took all of his self control for Vincent not to grab her. He didn’t know it but he was having the same confusing feelings as Bo. He couldn’t decide if he was angry, proud, or turned on.

“Wow you didn’t completely chop her to bits. Proud of you!” Caroline laughed and Katie nodded.

“It was really hard. Fucking bitch got me good.” She lifted her left arm and sure enough there was a long scratch mark down her forearm.

Caroline took Katie’s arm and examined it, “I can fix that. Doesn’t look like it’ll need stitches. Should be good with a bandage wrap.”

Bo and Vincent jaws dropped (well Vincent’s would if he didn’t have his mask on) they looked to each other to see if the other had figured out what was going on and what happened to their sweet girls.

Katie finally looked to Vincent and smiled, “Hello darling. I missed you.” She moved towards him and put her hand on his chest. He grabbed her arm and looked over it, clearly not happy with her injury, “I’ll be okay, just a scratch.” She tried to reassure him but that clearly wasn’t going to be easy.

“Okay what the fuck is going on here?” Bo’s voice boomed out. “You know the rules. Stay home and don’t talk to strangers. You two are going home, cleaning up, putting on your pretty little dresses, making dinner, and waiting for us. We are gonna clean up this mess. Dinner better be on the fucking table and you better be ready to explain.”

Katie looked to Vincent who nodded in agreement with his twin. Caroline took Katie’s hand and they walked back to the house.

“Well that went better than I thought it would.”

—

Bo and Vincent walked into the house to find exactly what they asked for, dinner on the table and the girls cleaned up in their pretty dresses. Vincent took note of the bandage wrapped around Katie’s arm. Seeing the boys enter, they stood and went to them. Their nerves could be felt through the thickness in the air. They knew the boys weren’t not happy. They tried their best to impress them cleaning up nice, doing their hair and makeup, and even made them pot roast again.

“Sit.” Bo ordered, Caroline immediately did as told, while Katie looked to Vincent. When he crossed his arms and nodded Katie hurried to follow suit. Bo and Vincent took their seats and plates were made in silence. No one spoke for a few minutes everyone just eating.

“You better have a good explanation for that little stunt you just pulled. You could’ve been killed.” Bo said stabbing into a potato with a little more force than was truly needed.

The girls looked to each other and Katie took a breath explaining everything the best she could about they figured out what was going on and how they ended up out there tonight.

After her speech with a few add-ins from Caroline the only response they got was some hums and nods. Fear was starting to creep in their bodies as they cleaned the kitchen after dinner, the boys eyes falling them every move they made. Once things were cleaned the stood next to their husbands.

Vincent took Katie’s hand and lead her to their room while Bo did the same with Caroline. The girls had no idea what the night had in store but seeing as they weren’t dead and no one was crying they hoped it would go okay.

—

Bo closed the door to their room and turned to find a well welcomed sight, his baby on her knees, hands folded on her thighs, and her head down.

“I’m sorry Bo. I knew the rules and I didn’t follow them. I’m sorry. You made the rules for a reason, to keep me safe. I’m sorry.” Her voice was so small and so soft. His perfect girl.

Bo put his hand on her cheek and she looked up to him tears glistening in her eyes, “Get your pajamas on and get to bed babygirl.”

He was mad. Oh lord was he mad. It was taking everything in his power to control his anger. Luckily Vincent had had the forethought to make him burn off some anger, one of the house towards the edge of town needed new windows now but it had calmed him a little. He didn’t want, couldn’t, act like he had on his birthday. He would kill himself before he did that again. He had to control himself.

Caroline changed into one of his shirts he had given her to use as pajamas. She was swimming in it but he knew she had a motive behind it. She didn’t wear anything under it, it was a welcome invitation for him to touch her. It was her way of initiating sex when she was still to shy to openly ask for it or to start the foreplay. His sweet little babygirl, who blushed when he held her hand sometimes, had blood on her hands now. They didn’t want the girls involved, sure they would have to tell them what was going on eventually. But they had hoped to keep this quiet a little longer.

He took his clothes off leaving him in his boxers and got in bed next to her. He put his hand over hers intertwining their fingers. She looked up to him and tried to smile but he could see the fear behind her eyes. He hated that look, that he had made her have that look. All her adrenaline had faded and she was coming to terms with what she did.

“Babygirl,” he released her hand and pulled her into his lap, “I’ll be honest with you I’m mad as hell right now. But I ain’t gonna hurt you like that again. I’ll promise again baby.” She put her head on his shoulder and he could feel her shaking a bit. “We were gonna tell ya what was happening. We had plans to but we didn’t wanna do it too soon. Didn’t wanna scare ya away.”

He heard her make a small noise and he pulled her away from his shoulder looking into her eyes, “What ya say baby?”

“Why didn’t you kill me and Katie? Why, why are we alive?”

Bo smirked and kissed her forehead, “‘Cus babygirl you were meant to be my pretty little wife. As soon as I saw ya two walking into my shop I knew it. Two pretty little twins for me and Vinny. Once you left for the museum I went and got Vinny and told him all about ya. Will admit your sisters pretty but you had my eye always baby.”

Caroline’s giggle interrupted him, “We’re identical twins, silly, we look the same.”

Bo smiled hearing her sweet laugh, “Nah I can tell the difference. There’s something about you babygirl that spoke to my heart. I knew that you were meant to be a Sinclair. Be my wife and mama to my babies. Gonna be so pretty with my baby in your belly. Sweet little mama with my sweet little Chevy girl.”

“What if we have a boy first?” She asks tracing her fingers over his arm. “I always liked Matthew like from the Bible. My favorite Gospel. Call him Mattie.”

Bo nodded and smiled at her, “That sounds good baby. Chevy and Mattie.”

Talking about baby names had helped calm him down and he wrapped his arms around her holding her tight to him before laying her down. She waited him to lay back as well before resting her head on his chest where she continued to trace patterns with her fingers.

“I love you Beauregard Sinclair.”

“And I love you Caroline Sinclair.”

—

Vincent had learned quickly that his angel had a habit of crying when her emotions got too much, too happy, too sad, too angry, too anything. She held everything in for too long before finally breaking. He knew as soon as the door was closed tears would be flowing and he was right.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry. It just, everything was happen so fast… and I’m sorry, Vincent. I’m sorry. I…” Her words faltered and sobs shook her body. He cupped her cheeks in his hands and put his forehead against hers. His thumbs brushed the tears from her and continued to rub soft circles over her face. After a few moments he let his hands fall and took a step back.

He started moving his hands and she realized he wanted to sign today instead of speak or write things down. They had been practicing for a few months and he had gotten quite good. He wasn’t fluent yet but Katie dared to say he was pretty close.

V- I’m not mad angel.

“What do you mean?” Katie both asked aloud and signed.

V- I’m not mad. Upset? Yes, you should have told me. So I could protect you.

“You could have been honest with me in the first place. There’s enough secrets here as there is.”

V- I am sorry angel. You’re right but I didn’t want to scare you off anymore than you already were.

Then she asked the same question her twin had asked of his, “Why didn’t you kill me and Caroline? Why, why are we alive?” The tears had returned, not quite as hard as before but tears nonetheless. Vincent didn’t respond. He pulled her into his arms held her as close to him as possible. His hands rubbed up and down her back letting her cry.

She felt one of his hands move from her back for a moment than came back.

“You have always been safe with me. Since I first saw you, I knew you were mine.” His voice was a soft whisper. “The most beautiful girl in the world.”

“We look a like we’re twins. Besides the hair but that’s not much.” Her laugh was muffled a bit but he heard it.

Vincent shook his head and kissed her cheek, “Your souls are different. But yours and mine are the missing piece to each other. I love you Catherine Sinclair. My sweet angel.”

She smiled at him her eyes shining with love, “And I love you Vincent Sinclair.”

[scarlet-traveler]

Touch #50!

Touch #50: putting a hand over the other’s mouth to shut them up

Sorry for the delay, hope you enjoy it!

~

Contrary to popular belief, Katsuki enjoyed listening to Eijirou talk.

Normally he wouldn’t want to listen to anybody say a single word because 90% of what any of his classmates said was fucking useless, and the same could be said about the stuff that Eijirou spouted, but it was also…different. Like the random stories about rocks found and dogs pet and failed cooking mattered.

The crush Katsuki had been harboring for the redhead since Kamino may have contributed to this opinion. Maybe. Possibly.

He still maintained that everything Eijirou said was important now that they were dating, and he’d gladly lay on his bed, head in his lap while Eijirou’s hand played in his hair as he prattled on about who-knows-what, his voice vibrating the air and Katsuki’s whole being, setting as a cozy warmth in his chest.

Today, however, Katsuki was debating whether or not to rip Eijirou’s lips off his face so that he couldn’t say another word for the rest of his life.

“Have I told you how pretty you are?” Eijirou said, fucking blatantly and without shame as he stared at Katsuki across the little table in his room with a dopey smile, elbow propped on the tabletop and fist holding up his hand.

Katsuki’s ears burned, and his grip tightened on his pencil, but he resolutely kept his gaze down as he glared at the study guide he was preparing. “Only about seven fucking times today.”

“Then let’s make it eight!” Eijirou cheered as if Katsuki’s heart wasn’t racing in a clear threat on his life. “Because you’re so pretty, Kats, the prettiest guy I’ve ever seen in my life. Did you know that your eyes sparkle when you get excited? They were sparkling when you beat Midoriya’s time during training today.”

The heat spread to Katsuki’s face, and he whipped his head up to glare at Eijirou. “The fuck, my eyes don’t sparkle!” Yeah, he’d been happy when he’d done better than Deku, but sparkling eyes? Fuck that.

Eijirou just grinned wider, the asshole. “They totally did, dude. And they sparkle all the time! Like when the class compliments your food when it’s your turn to cook, or when you find new All Might merch at the mall, or when you pass a test even though you’re too smart to ever get so much as a B.” His smile, his whole demeanor, then turned softer as he locked eyes with Katsuki, and the amount of love in his expression made him sharply inhale.

“They were sparkling this morning too. You looked at me as soon as you woke up, and you had the sweetest smile. You didn’t even try to hold it back like you usually do! You were just so adorable Katsuki, I swear-”

Katsuki couldn’t take listening to this anymore. He felt like his quirk had transferred to his face and it was about to explode it was so hot, so he did the only thing he could think of. He reached out, slapping a hand over Eijirou’s mouth; the loving look in his eyes disappeared as they went wide, blinking owlishly at Katsuki. “Ei, I love you, but I swear if you don’t shut the fuck up I am going to blow your face off. It’s like you’re trying to kill me, asshole.”

Eijirou fortunately took Katsuki’s threat to heart, not saying a single word as he blinked again. But then his eyes glinted, making Katsuki tense as he braced himself for whatever he could say next. Instead of words though, he felt Eijirou’s mouth open behind his hand, and something wet ran along the length of his palm.

Katsuki immediately yanked his hand back with a noise of disgust, wiping it off on his pants as he sent Eijirou an affronted glare. “Did you just lick my fucking hand?!”

“Yep!” Eijirou’s smile made it evident that he was particularly proud of himself for that stunt, as if it wasn’t a move for five year olds. “Knew that would make you move.”

“And did you know that you just licked fucking nitro?”

“Duh, I know what your quirk is.”

Katsuki just gave him a look, and he steadily watched the realization dawn on Eijirou’s face, pride slowly morphing into horror. “Oh.”

“Yeah, idiot. Congrats, you just poisoned yourself.” Katsuki got up and hauled Eijirou to his feet by the arm before dragging him to the door. “Now let’s get your dumbass to Recovery Girl before you pass out on me.”

“It’s not actually that bad, is it?” Eijirou asked, voice shaky.

Katsuki looked back at him with a raised eyebrow. “You wanna find out?”

Eijirou picking up the pace and dragging him along was answer enough.

Turns out Katsuki had been right; halfway to the main building Eijirou started getting sluggish, his face turning a little green, and by the time they made it to the nurse’s office Katsuki was practically carrying him inside. Neither had the courage to answer honestly about what had happened under Recovery Girl’s scrutinizing gaze. Katsuki was definitely too embarrassed to bring everything up.

[zozilly]

GHD|| Sailor Song by Gigi Perez is very Chrysanthe and Miraak...

[Edit: I wanted to @99corentine because this is their lovely fic that's consumed my life and also opinions]

So I was thinking about this fic, because I found it, read it on my flip phone, chewed it up and swallowed it in 12 hours over the span of three days, and I realized it is a very fitting song for these two at the beginning of their lil freakyship right after Miraak leaves Apocrypha. Now because I'm autistic and Skyrim is like the only thing I've consumed for two months now, I will be copy-pasting the lyrics and explaining.

[I saw her in the rightest way Looking like Anne Hathaway]

okay so this is to me, Chry seeing Miraak's face for the first time. I mean he was whipped, absolutely head over heels when he first met the guy, but like..... yknow?

Laughing while she hit her pen and coughed, and coughed[unrelated they didnt have pens.]

[And then she came up to my knees Begging, "Baby, would you please Do the things you said you'd do to me, to me?"]

THIS. this is my part. my lil bit. my absolutely pathetic mommy issues emotional neglect having ass itches amazingly for this bit. ABSOLUTELY this is both of them. Chry to Miraak in the "Hey I'm the most wet-cat man you'll get, and I am a tradgedy for you, please love me in a way that makes me forget those moments after thralldom." Miraak in his fucking "Silgron I have been trapped as no more than a pet for 4000 years, you are *mine* and you promised me so much, in exchange for small favors and such. I *need* you. Like I need no other."(because he is dramatic and a queer. and also has chewy amazing sour patch kids flavored character development that I enjoy normally.)

[Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor? And when you get a taste, can you tell me what's my flavor?]

theyre both patheti and love starved with extreme guilt.... like pooka what do you want from them?

[I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior]

THISTHISTHIS... Chry literally was saved from thralldom by Miraak and Miraak from Apocrypha!!! Chry is wholly hesitant to really belive in the divines, clearly stating he steps outside those boxes, and Miraak literally says he doesn't give a crap because his gods were the dov, whom he rejected. but he owes his freedom to Chry, and vice versa.

[My mom says that she's worried, but I'm covered in this favor

theyre both without parents.

[And when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong]

gay fucks get emotional when they say gex

[I sleep so I can see you, 'cause I hate to wait so long I sleep so I can see you, and I hate to wait so long]

telepathy, must I say more? No? ok I will<3 Chry has said he's gonna go beddy bye so he can talk to Miraak.

[She took my fingers to her mouth The kind of thing that makes you proud That nothing else had ever worked out, worked out]

Miraak and his oral fixation<3 and his past with that one priest or wghatever.... I read that bit at like midnight....

[And lately, I've tried other things But nothing can capture the sting Of the venom she's gonna spit out right now]

oh? Chry thriving off of Miraak being possesive??? oh????

[Oh, won't you kiss me on the mouth and love me like a sailor? And when you get a taste, can you tell me what's my flavor? I don't believe in God, but I believe that you're my savior I know that you've been worried, but you're dripping in my favor And when we're getting dirty, I forget all that is wrong I sleep so I can see you, 'cause I hate to wait so long I sleep so I can see you, and I hate to wait so long]

we done this b4

[And we can run away to the walls inside your house I can be the cat, baby, you can be the mouse And we can laugh off things that we know nothing about We can go forever, until you wanna sit it out]

when they when they in lakeview... when they they when...

[meirimerens]

got the tldr of the vid that I'm Not Watching All That & somewhat amusing how the straw breaking the camel's back for people over James Somerton is his blatant and unashamed plagiarism (as it should be genuinely i don't think you can nor should recover from this) like he hasn't regurgitated for years vile, unempathetic, ahistorical and Purely Just Wrong information about gay history including about the fight for legal same-sex marriage in the US and the AIDS crisis. like an alarming amount of people truly heard his ass say "all the good fun funky artistic and radical gays died of aids and all those who were left were unfun stuck-up prudes and conservatives also the fight for legal same-sex marriage was an assimilationist ploy by the latter who just wanted big gay weddings" as if the gay men who survived the epidemic didn't literally lose lovers and friends and entire communities and long-term partners who they shared a life with and who were denied any crumb of this previous life at their death because there was no legal recognition for same-sex cohabitation and unions and their homophobic family could tear everything from the surviving partner thanks to this lack of recognition and let it slide.

some people out there were truly so eager to shit on the boring assimilationist prude gays who survived aids by being stuck-up prudes and who just wanted "big gay weddings" they made up in their minds to get mad at that they turned their brains off and let it slide. they could've used their smoothed-out brains for ONE minute & found out that surviving took 1) plain boring luck and 2) radical, loud, proud gay activists campaigning for safe/safer sex and the information campaigns they led, as well as the protests and demonstrations they undertook to make the government fucking care for once. and that legally-recognized unions [be they civil or religious] were a matter of survival for the partner left behind. some people out there truly let a business major with a turtleneck (possibly the definition of boring) passing himself off as cool and radical and an intellectual tell them homophobic bullshit. and did not blink. like OF COURSE this guy's gonna be a plagiarist. he needs to get his information from SOMEWHERE. because when he tries to formulate his own stuff it's complete fabrications or the frankensteining of multiple sources that he manages to misunderstand/misrepresent threefold over. trying to fit a knit sock over the foot with the inside out and wonder why that itches.

i know many people in his audience are likely very young and also likely american and as such did most of their growing up in a world where their country (1 out of 195. give or take.) had legalized gay marriage but i cannot even begin to describe 1) how Young legalized gay wedding is, even in ""the west"" and 2) how many. other countries there are. my country legalized same-sex marriage before the US did. i am not even 25 and i still remember the hordes of catholics marching down the streets chanting homophobic slogans, implying the only reason two mommies or two daddies would want to raise a child together is for nefarious, vile purposes. i still remember families having to drag their asses into court to argue that, yes, a woman who raised a child for its whole life with another woman she's in a long-term committed cohabitated relationship with should have the right to be considered a direct guardian even if she's not biologically related to the child, and spending thousands of bucks having to argue their case in court. this might be shocking to some, but there are countries where homosexuality is punishable by death. in others, not by death, but by imprisonment. in others, not by imprisonment, but by ""medical intervention"". in others, not by ""medical intervention" but by fines. and in some others still, you can be gay (yay!) but you still cannot get married or civil-unioned, and the very same shit that was discussed in the 80s is still discussed now. the right to stay a guardian of your partner's child if your partner dies or is ill, so the kid does not go into foster care. the right to inherit your partner's property according to married rights instead of having through long annoying time- and money-consuming legal processes. the right to arrange your partner's funeral or have a say in their medical choices if they're incapacitated instead of their (potentially homophobic) families.

like We Are Not There Yet. we are not in a world where any homosexual can truly, fully, wholeheartedly assimilate, whether you consider it a good thing or not. fun gay artists and boring uninteresting gay office workers die the same death that we all do. the one you don't wake from. and guess what. all types of homosexuals, regardless of which ones you pick and choose to be mad at, are affected by homophobic legislation. not just the ones you think should be spared because they're oh so fun. and oh so radical.

donate to the rainbow railroad org if you can. they help LGBT+ people escape state-sponsored violence. a singular nail on one of their members' hand does more activism and real-life good than any mfer making video essays could do in his entire life.

[porcellune]

new year new... idk

haven't made a proper new years post in a while. i think this year kinda earned one.

tw: death, suicide, and so on

so... 2023.

where do i start?

a lot of good. and way, way more bad. but i don't want to lose sight of all the good because of it.

for the first time after knowing these guys for over a decade, i met my best friends nate, kathy, and kai in real life. spent over a week together with them, went to a con, got to share a bed with them the whole time, and force nate to eat a bunch of american food.

but. a month later, kai killed herself. and i'm still dealing with that. probably will be for the rest of my life. she was my best friend, i would call her my soulmate, my sister. she meant the world to me. i wish i could've spent every day of the rest of our lives like we spent that week in DC. i regret all the things i didn't do yet with her. all the things i couldn't do for her, to help her.

i miss her. a lot. i've just gotten to point finally, after she passed on aug 28, where just the thought of her doesn't make me spiral into misery and cut myself. i still get the feeling sometimes---i travelled again for the first time since our trip to DC, to see my childhood best friend graduate, and the entire plane ride was miserable. i just thought of her the whole time, because the last time i'd been on a plane was to see her, and then to leave her. and i kept thinking about how much i fucking wished i could've taken her back to vegas with me. she joked about it, when they dropped me off the airport, got out of the car and pretended like she was leaving with me. i wish she could have.

she made the year really stressful. from her new relationship to the constant troubles that came with it, to her psych ward visit, and then her constant attempts. over and over. and i had to keep stopping her, fighting with her. found out her whole philosophy on suicide---that it's her body her choice, and therefore anyone not wanting her to kill herself is being selfish, and that it was just a difference in philosophy. it was difficult. the conversations i had with her, i didn't want anyone else to hear. unfortunately it all spilled out, and then she took her own life.

i would've dealt with that for the rest of our lives if i had to, though. if it meant i could still talk to her, to see her again. i would've foiled her suicide attempts and argued with her and fought with her about it until we both grew old if i had to. i wouldn't have had to, i hope. but it was hard to convince her that there was any life to live other than this, for her. that she wouldn't feel this way forever.

it was a difficult year, if not for that already, but on top of that i was still dealing with the aftermath of a bad, drawn out breakup. so while trying to help her, i was barely able to help myself cope and move on from that---the fights and the shitty words and feelings. i felt pretty close to trying to attempt myself, last year. i'm better now. back on my medication. and while my self-harm is still an issue, it hasn't been for a couple months. its still on my mind, though. not always but a lot of the time.

i've been struggling pretty badly with feeling like i don't have a place in the world. worsened by the obvious, you know. i place a lot of my self and identity on the people around me---so who am i if not his boyfriend, if not kai's best friend? so much of my self-perception revolved around them.

there was a good month or two where i sort of just like... didn't want to exist, or accomplish anything. it's hard to describe but i felt like---why bother with transitioning? why bother with top surgery? HRT? legal documents? all that? if she's not here. i was her best friend, and she was always so proud and happy for me when i made progress---when i started growing a stache, she'd point it out everytime we video called and say "ooh, you look like a man, so handsome", or the more common, "you look like a fag". when my voice started dropping a bit, she noticed. it dropped even more this past month. i wish she could hear it.

this is certainly nsfw, but it makes sense in the context of our relationship (she was always very openly sexual around me, and vice versa. it was just part of our dynamic), but when we met up in july, i let her do... a lot of things lol. including suck on my nipple. which, yea, sounds weird, but it made sense for us. i told her now she had to live long enough to see me get top surgery, so she could test out if i still had enough feeling in my nipples. she said she would. so, for a while after she died, i felt like... i can't? or, why should i? if she won't be there, for me. if she won't be there to see my results.

it's really hard, thinking things like that. i'm struggling to not start crying right now. which is a miracle, honestly, i haven't been able to cry as much since i started T and yet because of her i've cried more in the past few months than i have in the year and a half since i started T.

i really miss her. i wish we could've done more, together. the week i spent with her felt like what i'd wanted my life with her to be for years. nearly a decade. you know, you grow up a mentally ill teen on the internet with all your most important friendships being these long distance people you've never met irl, and you talk and talk about what your life could be if you all lived nearby. and then for one week, that's what my life was. and i've never been happier in my life, genuinely. i wanted that to be my life, forever. it felt so comfortable and easy; i've notoriously had some bad anxiety issues about meeting up irl with people for the first time, i sort of shut down and go non-verbal, struggle to socialize or talk. but with her, kathy, and nate---i felt none of that. none of it. everything was so easy. i wasn't anxious or scared or anything.

i loved being with them. i loved doing mundane things like shopping at walmart and target with them while they pushed me around in the shopping cart. loved going to hot topic and picking out clothes with them. loved seeing the barbie movie in theaters opening week with them. going to a convention with them, something id' wanted for so long, because conventions are such a big part of my life and all i'd ever wanted was to share it with them. we cosplayed together. i put kai in my mikan cosplay, it fit her so well. when we went to the danganronpa meetup at otakon, she fit the part so easily even though she was kinda nervous. i still look at the pictures.

she really was a perfect mikan. nate was junko, you can see him on the right there, i was komaeda, and kathy was chiaki. it fit us all so well. i wish we could do it again.

it's been hard to wear my mikan cosplay again, after that. knowing she wore it.

i miss her a lot. but i'd be remiss to not mention that despite how awful this year was, i am hoping for a lot better in the upcoming one, and i'm going to make it so. and i know last time ifelt this way, a pandemic suddenly happened and things got worse, but i'm really gonna try, lol.

so what do i hope for, this year?

i'm going to see kathy & nate again, mark my words. i already have plans to see kathy in february and i'm going to enjoy myself the best of my ability, even if it'll be hard to be in her house again, considering the last time i was was when kai was there, too.

i want to get my passion for art back, and i think i'm already on my way to it. i want to get back into painting, both digitally and physically. and to draw with emotion rather than the intention to just make something pretty people will like.

back to the gym. rather stereotypical, but i gained a lot of weight after kai passed, and i want to get back in shape now.

drawing more things im passionate about rather than making myself stuck fixated on one interest.

top surgery. i wanna figure it out. even if i cant get it this year, i want to figure out what i need to do it.

a job hopefully. of some kind. just want to feel more stable money-wise if i can.

im just going to do things that ive wanted to do for a long time. im gonna stop putting it off. and just do it. because the time will pass anyways. so i want to do it now.

happy new year, everyone.

[liverpool-enjoyer]

who would the liverpool players be if they were in mi7

this,,, is from JULY,, i have no idea how on God's green earth i didnt answer this sooner cause i will do ANYTHING to talk abt mission impossible,,, ANYTHING. anywho its been so long anon probly forgot that they sent this 😭😭 this ones for you anon, whoever you are

ok so basically what im gonna do is cast everyone as the characters role in the story rather than the characters themselves. so like for exmaple its like an au of sorts. like im saying trent would be our main man ethan not bc they share personality traits, but bc i could see trent filling out the main character kinda role.

ok so anyway!!! yeah trent is ethan!! look me in the eyes n tell me trent wouldnt have the time of his damn life as an action movie hero. i could totally see him filling out an ethan kinda role. hes still,,, relatively young ig(???) jus like how ethan was in the first movie, which in combination to him being naive led to him being betrayed. n i could see trent doing whatever it takes to get the mission done, so long as no innocents or his fellow imf agents are harmed

now WHO is ethan without ilsa!!! youre gonna hafta hear me out for this one but for ilsa im going w robbo. now HEAR ME OUT as i said this is based less off personality n more on the role they play in the story. n ethan n ilsa are equals, they UNDERSTAND each other. but the MAIN reason i chose robbo as ilsa is bc of my choice for,,,

grace!! grace would be dominik. now i chose this bc in the movie ethan (trent) is forced to choose between the lives of someone hes known n loved for literal years n understands more than he understands himself (ilsa/robbo),,, n some rando he met like five minutes ago (grace/dominik). n he ACTUALLY STRUGGLES TO CHOOSE BETWEEN EM DESPITE THERE BEING A P OBVIOUS ANSWER. now tell me that doesnt work w their lil friendship triangle. also no shade to grace i love her shes a real one but idk what mcq was thinking w that

ok for the rest a the team!!! good ol reliable luther is virgil. this ones simple. bro jus gets the job DONE yknow??? n i could totally see virg n trent having a similar relationship to ethan n luther, w equal parts helping each other out n ragging on each other

oh, my dearly beloved sweet benji,,, when we see him in ghost protocol hes a new field agent, so im going w our lil harvey. hes just starting out, but hes super promising n will surely grow into his own <3 also benjis jus a silly lil guy. n what is harvey if not that

ok i know I KNOW you said lfc players specifically but,,, there are some characters that i feel would work best w players from other teams

my beloved alanna n zola for example i kinda wanna say would be pedri n gavi respectively. yeah the ages are mixed up but why am i lowkey kinda seeing the vision of charasmatic philanthropist/secret arms dealer pedri n everpresently angry/socially awkward brother gavi. it also works that alanna n zola are siblings cause gavi n pedri are literally the same fucking person. im also realizing now that this means dominik would hafta impersonate pedri which is,,, kinda funny

paris would be sergio ramos. bc theyre fucking crazy.

OK LIKE IM ACTUALLY PROUD A THIS BUT IM SO SAD THAT THE ORIGINAL ANON PROBLY WONT SEE IT CAUSE I TOOK SO LONG 😭😭 N I DONT THINK ANY A YALL ARE INTO M:I SO DAMN