#this too is etc
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mantra when you fuck up is "i'm in my early 20s it's literally not a big deal"
#AND ALSO ''I WILL DO BETTER NEXT TIME'' THAT IS ALSO IMPORTANT. but also it being not a big deal is important too#lest you let yourself get twisted into knots by the fucking up therefore causing you to fuck up more. ETC ETC.#talking#sketch diary
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deepthroating a gun without breaking eye contact...... he put his entire gongyussy into that | SQUID GAME 2
+ the video because the sound he makes when he puts the gun in his mouth? [redacted]
update: he improvised that. the man really said i'll go full slut.

#my beautiful unhinged wife..... you know the salesman is an utter freak on the streets and in the sheets#i watched one episode of the new squid game for the plot#the plot: gong yoo showing off his lack of gag reflex <3. he gloc on that glock etc.#the way he drags his bottom lip down with the muzzle of the gun sjhfsgfjhfgkj. redacted redacted redacted.#anyway. new username to celebrate#he put his entire ahjussy into his performance here. his ahjussiussy. his ahjussussy. you get it.#mutuals/followers from my old asian drama blog remember when train to busan came out in 2016 and for one and a half months#and i slipped back into my obsession and i was just a gong yoo shrine? ;_____;#i'm on the brink of regressing.......... help.....#also pardon the quality realised only after exporting that my grain was too strong -.-;#gun tw#blood tw#gong yoo#squid game#squid game spoilers#squidgameedit#netflixedit#tvedit#kdramaedit#uservik#chewieblog#userbbelcher#userisaiah#it's been a while i forgot what other tags there are…#long post#you know what.#gay#i cannot read salesman/gihun fic because i dislike ljj with a burning passion though.....
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couldnt draw my thang for mid-autumn so treated myself to a calne redesign instead
#calne ca#hatsune miku#VOCALOID#cw: body horror#<- And I Fucking Mean That We Are Not Fucking Around Today#well we are. as in I drew this as a fuckaround treat for myself#but the body horror tag is the most warranted its ever been on this blog#ask to tag#I am as ever on my journey to make calne ca Worse. her OG version is too cool. even the crab ver is too cool#I need her to be worse to look at. I am also getting myself into to mood to test my hand at boarding a pmv for my friend's cover#I think my thought for this was ''I should try and give her a more insectoid bodyplan''#which in this mostly means gently three-part body and six limbs (my favourite amount of limbs to draw rn)#actually almost gave her eight but didnt like how that silhouette came out so I mermaided her uh. abdomen I guess#though maybe next time I do this I should push that idea more. the head and torso are still very distinct for one unified part#I feel like one of my old attempts was onto something with like. a more horizontal body plan... well! live and learn etc#happy late mid autumn I guess. I should play with touys about it... I miss model kits. mayhaps...
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i have such a love for characters who descend into madness or villainy out of deep, deep empathy. characters who fundamentally cannot cope with the cruel realities they find themselves in and blow up about it in spectacular fashion. fallen angel type characters with tears of outrage in their eyes. characters who break before they bend, and break so badly they splatter blood all over their noble ideals. every variation on it gets me so good
#getou suguru#kaneki ken#abyss twin#i know there are others who im not thinking of rn#feel free to reblog with more examples#aphelion.txt#tropes#WAIT I REMEMBERED MORE#jaina proudmoore#dimitri alexandre blaiddyd#phosphophyllite#i just spent like half an hour trying to find this on tv tropes but it must be. Too specific of a thing i have in mind bc#I just kept finding similar and related but too broad categories#despair event horizon. fallen hero. well intentioned extremist. etc etc etc#like specifically i'm talking about when the character's EMPATHY is the CRUX of the problem. sosooo crunchyjuicytasty#edit:#also just know that i am reading every tag on this post#and enthusiastically scribbling down the names i dont recognizr#so i can check out their series later#edit 2 wow this post blew up 🫡 godspeed fellow villain likers#the amount of people tagging this as 'me lmao' is concerning to me#wwx#how did i fucking forget this was also yllz era wwx
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as someone who has gone long stretches without electricity, let alone an internet connection
BACK UP YOUR WORK---YES, make physical copies. KEEP offline resources. KEEP your landline. CARRY CASH. DON'T get important appliances that RUN ON WIFI (like cars, refrigerators, thermostats, etc). LEARN TO READ A PAPER MAP
#genuinely and completely seriously#keep a physical flashlight too not just your phone#also matches#an updated first aid kit#rechargable batteries#etc
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this is just my opinion but i think any good media needs obsession behind it. it needs passion, the kind of passion that's no longer "gentle scented candle" and is now "oh shit the house caught on fire". it needs a creator that's biting the floorboards and gnawing the story off their skin. creators are supposed to be wild animals. they are supposed to want to tell a story with the ferocity of eating a good stone fruit while standing over the sink. the same protective, strange instinct as being 7 and making mud potions in pink teacups: you gotta get weird with it.
good media needs unhinged, googling-at-midnight kind of energy. it needs "what kind of seams are invented on this planet" energy and "im just gonna trust the audience to roll with me about this" energy. it needs one person (at least) screaming into the void with so much drive and energy that it forces the story to be real.
sometimes people are baffled when fanfic has some stunning jaw-dropping tattoo-it-on-you lines. and i'm like - well, i don't go here, but that makes sense to me. of fucking course people who have this amount of passion are going to create something good. they moved from a place of genuine love and enjoyment.
so yeah, duh! saturday cartoons have banger lines. random street art is sometimes the most precious heart-wrenching shit you've ever seen. someone singing on tiktok ends up creating your next favorite song. youtubers are giving us 5 hours of carefully researched content. all of this is the impossible equation to latestage capitalism. like, you can't force something to be good. AI cannot make it good. no amount of focus-group testing or market research. what makes a story worth listening to is that someone cares so much about telling it - through dance, art, music, whatever it takes - that they are just a little unhinged about it.
one time my friend told me he stayed up all night researching how many ways there are to peel an orange. he wrote me a poem that made me cry on public transportation. the love came through it like pith, you know? the words all came apart in my hands. it tasted like breakfast.
#warm up#writeblr#actually this is because again i don't go here#i don't read/write fanfic but i have nothing but respect for my troops#but i also have never played minecraft. im sorry. please ask me any question about pokemon tho i love that shit#anyway#out of some banal and thoughtless curiosity i watched the minecraft movie trailer#and again i know nothing about minecraft. i am aware im in an endangered population#but im watching this going: this is so fucking.... BAD#there is NO LOVE in it!#like if someone who has NO history in minecraft watches that and is like - ohhh this is soulless#WHO IS THE AUDIENCE????#ppl who love minecraft are gonna hate it!!!#at some point it's the ''mean girls musical movie'' problem --#some people will always hate the premise of what you're doing and some people will love it#make it for the ppl who love it#and usually that somewhat convinces the haters to like. chill enough to TRY it . bc it IS good#but when you try to make it for the haters..... nobody likes it. it doesn't have passion. energy. footwork#which is a small way of saying a big thing: if you love something. fucking make it and assume someone will love it too.#i love u . be brave . be bold. be in boston and come to my reading#where i wrote a really weird fucked up little book.#love u love u love u etc
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FNAF Springtrap's first night in Dead by daylight..
#myart#chloesimagination#comic#fnaf#five nights at freddy's#fnaf fanart#springtrap#william afton#fnaf 3#dead by daylight#scream movie#saw#michael myers#huntress dbd#alien movie#silent hill#pyramid head#ghost face#chucky#deadpool and wolverine#gambit#IM STILL NOT over the DBD X FNAF announcement#I HAVE way too much I wanna draw#so I wanted to draw this out before I move on 🙏🏾#William might be too confident in his ability here#I bet the other killers will definitely welcome him with open arms#TBH I can’t wait for this collab to drop#JUST SO I have the excuse to draw all these horror icons#just interacting with fnaf characters etc#it’ll be so fun.. in a year from now I’ll be so powerful
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Was looking at refs and since Viktor has two different leg braces I was wondering, do we think he wears them simultaneously?? The refs don't perfectly line up perspective-wise so it's hard to tell but parts of the one he wears during the Hexcore scenes look like they could maybe line up with the brace that he wears over his clothes, but also some parts really don't and look like they'd be super uncomfy. Also HOW does he take these on and off. Experts weigh in
#viktor#arcane#ig my assumption would be that he wears both simultaneously cause in the scene where he injects the shimmer#it seems implied that he just threw off his clothes and kept experimenting#so one might assume he was already wearing the smaller one underneath#tho it is a funny image to think of him just being like 'one sec i gotta go all the way home and grab my other brace to do this'#he can take off the back brace too cause hes not wearing it in the scene where he's in the hospital bed and you can see his shoulder#where the strap would be#but that one seems to make even less sense functionality wise#everything looks like its screwed together#or screwed INTO him#but only the top bolts on his spine are i think#in the close ups of his back brace model it looks like theres cushioning underneath the parts of it that cover the rest of his spine#so he can take it off. but HOW#what parts of it unscrew/detatch to pull open and off#does it not do that at all and he just has to shimmy it off his shoulder and all the way down his legs to get it off like a romper#the shape language of the designs are cool but like. tell me how it wooorrkkksss#forgive me if im just dumb and dont know at all how braces work and theres a very simple practical explanation for all this#any king who wants to infodump about mobility aids at me....the floor is yours#something to be said i suppose about the fact that zaunites have crazy prosthetics with wild augmentations that work flawlessly#and piltover's like. idk heres some fucking uncomfortable ass metal. salo gets wheelchair in non ada compliant place#they havent ever needed to adapt to accommodate disabilities etc etc#or maybe artists were just like 'heres a design' and everybody clapped and didnt give it a second thought#and then they just turned off the visibility on the mesh when they didnt need it knowing thered not be a scene where its taken off#dont even wanna THINK about what that rig would look like#like 40 different controllers#soft body and rigid hard surfaces needing to move together....#a cold chill just shot up my spine#<- guy who is only an animator and doesnt know how to rig#forgive the magic wand tool with zero cleanup. i am lazy
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BTW... PSA.... even if we arent mutuals if youre in my notes regularly theres a Very high chance i am still fond of you. yes im vaguing someones tags on the compliment the person u rbed this from post. but like. positive vaguing? THE POINT IS im weird abt following ppl but IM STILL SENDING U FOND VIBES...
#i have to acclimate myself into following people. first i have to spend a few days to weeks checking someones blog manually#and i cant follow too many new people in the same burst or else theres TOO MUCH new unfamiliarity on my dash#and i become a small and easily frightened beast alarmed by change#also im just....................... incredibly picky kjhsdkjjkdsj sometimes ppl i generally am :)! towards do occasionally rb#from someone who i want to throw bricks at. and then i cant follow them but im still :)! when i see them in notifs#and sometimes its just that im going AAAA!!! AAAA!!! and cant put more new things on my dash#or in some cases its someone im fond of seeing/chatting w whenever we have talked BUT they simply are also into stuff im not rly into#and i dont want it on my dash despite liking them as a person. etc. you know how it is#ALL OF WHICH TO SAY................... :)!#rimi talks
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growing up!
#FALLS TO THE FLOOR!!!!#so shocking news: the silver artbook actually killed me a little. this is the first finished pic ive made since#wow isnt it crazy that 26 completed illustrations would kinda take it outta ya. bananas. i need to Not do a full bg again for a minute#i had the stupid thought like 'oohhgh i could do a series of silver and lilia as hes growing up!!' im HITTING ME!!! NO MORE SERIES!!!#I CAN DO NON-RELATED PICS OF THAT IF I MUST!!! THE PRESSURE OF A SERIES IS TOO TIRING RN!!!!#my life is a whirlwind i JUST moved and now might need to move again bc id make a ton more#im trying to sell my house and its going very poorly. im doing well at work. ID HAFTA MOVE ACROSS THE COUNTRY AGAIN#ID BE BACK NOOOORTH id go to pennsylvania <3 im from new york so the thought of being closer to my mom is rly nice#and i have friends there both from high school and ohiiiio and new england etc etc!!!! YAY!!!#twst#twisted wonderland#twst silver#lilia vanrouge#suntails#did u miss this. be honest. when i vanish for months at a time do u miss the rambling life updates. theyre who i am
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make it vicious, take a stab
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#jjk fanart#gojo satoru#jujutsu kaisen fanart#jujutsu gojo#jjk gojo#jjk satoru#blood/#jjk spoilers#jjk manga spoilers#just in case idk#i believe in night moves fv supremacy#i feel like i say this every time but im dead deceased on the floor in the ground etc etc#maximum effort fr gojo as usual sighhhhhhhhhhhh#3 days on this mf who let me draw another mirror who didnt talk me down#i got so frustrated after i finished his reflection only to realize i had a whole other half gojo to draw#do not look too closely ik its not perfectly mirrored ik ik ik i wanted to die the whole time pls b kind#especially the hair gjhdfkdgk the last mirrored char i drew was megumi and at least with him his hair is dark#with which i can Conceal my mistakes#none of tht here sighs . this freak and his florescent hair#anyway even tho i died and perished and expired etc i am . SO happy w this u have no idea#blood sweat and tears went into this one#and easter eggs! so many easter eggs#pls take it and enjoy im tired of staring at him and his god awful lipstick job . make yourself decent smh
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My conspiracy theory is that one of the reasons they fired Stephanie J. Block for the role of Elphaba in 2000 and replaced her with Idina Menzel at the end of the OBC workshops is because SJB played the role SO gay that it was quickly crossing the line of plausible deniability. Like she doesn't seem to be able to help herself.
And thank god she eventually got to play the role on Broadway (arguably one of the best - if not THE best - actresses who ever did), because we finally got to see her get super fucking handsy and stare lovingly into Glinda's eyes inches away from her face for three hours:
Like holy shit why do you keep looking at Annaleigh Ashford like you want to eat her alive??
Plus I cannot emphasize enough just how effective and moving this particular version of For Good is. Straight up feels like wedding vows.
(Ironically, she also has the best chemistry with Fiyero's character, and arguably the very sweetest performance of As Long As You're Mine in the entire slime tutorial universe.* So I'm just reading this as a Thropple Truther performance.)
*But that's just because she was (and still is) literally married to him. So they get uh. A little carried away in their performance. *cut to Sebastian Arcelus holding lantern up, his face covered in green makeup from aggressively making out with his wife on stage for several minutes* Apparently the makeup team HATED that song for them.
#wicked#gelphie#stephanie j block#I will literally NEVER stop yelling about her being robbed#my Roman Empire etc etc#not Menzel's fault obvi but I wish there was more recognition of SJB's contribution#most of the songs were written for her - only one song (Wizard and I) actually originated with Menzel#they said she was a 'less experienced performer' but I think she just played the character too gay??#my tin foil hat#tin man hat if you will#anyways hmu if you want a link to this performance#thropple#Annaleigh Ashford
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He added, after a pause: “Remember this, my friends: there are no such things as bad plants or bad men. There are only bad cultivators.”
Les Misérables, Volume I / Book V / Chapter III, trans. Hapgood
#is this anything? idk I've been looking at it too long to tell. anyways I just really liked this passage#^ the text here is a little abridged tbc bc i couldn't draw all the uses of nettles he lists etc#I think I might also color that last panel separately bc I'm really pleased with it tbh#thoughts#my art#les mis#jean valjean
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i’ll take care of everything
#mouthwashing#mouthwashing spoilers#anya mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#cw blood#cw gore#throws up over these 2 and their absolute horror show of a friendship i guess#you know how she already had the worst shit going on. and then Someone was too big of a coward to actually help her#and then next thing you know he’s a pile of ground beef on her infirmary table and she has to worry about keeping him alive too. yeah#i swear i dont actually hate curly i like him. also if he suddenly got better i would beat the fuck out of him#anyway. parallels upon parallels and its all too horrible for words etc.
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lived my whole life in guilt bc i thought i was responsible for people's feelings. newly realizing that other people are responsible for their feelings and reactions, even if they make it seem like i'm the problem. a lot of the time it really has to do w them and their own emotional regulation. i can't keep thinking i'm not allowed to have space bc of other people's insecurities. like i literally refuse to dim myself. other people are responsible for their feelings just as i'm responsible for mine.
#like i'm always gonna operate from a place of kindness but i've had to deal w so many people who're bad at communication/confrontation#which led me to think i'm the problem#that i deserve to be given the silent treatment or dismissed disregarded belittled etc#that's j not true. i'm far from perfect but i think so few people deserve that kind of reaction. and my biggest revelation is i do not#even if people want to make me think i do / that their reaction is justified / that i'm a burden etc#my biggest problem is i humor people like this for too long bc it's been normalized behavior to me#does this make any sense to anyone. it's the end of the year and i'm reflecting on so many things#p
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