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felassan · 1 month ago

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David Gaider on Dorian, under a cut for length:

"Now this is a fun one. It's no big secret I have a lot of feelings about Dorian, not least of which because he was my first (and only) gay male companion. There's a lot more to him than that, of course (as there should be), and it was quite a trip. So let's go! Now, DAI is a story all its own, but I'm sticking to the characters. In this case, back at the beginning, the writers were going to try something new: we were going to let the artists take a more active role in the companion creation process. Why? Because not doing so had caused a lot of problems. See, here's the thing: writers and artists speak two different languages. When talking about characters, we talk about their story. Who they are. What they want. We'd write up these briefs, huge and full of information... but it was never the information the artists needed. They wanted visual cues. I don't mean describing their appearance. Sure, we'd usually provide that, especially if there was a story case to be made, but often the artists vetoed us on appearance stuff anyhow so meh. No, I mean they looked for visual language while we tended to only talk about who the characters *were*. What would happen is they'd hone in on something visual in our write-up not intended to be a focus. The first write-up for Anders in DA2, for instance, mentioned he was "haggard" after his journey... and the first concept we got was this pale, shriveled man. "What... is this?" "YOU SAID HAGGARD!" 😅"

"That was the other trick: sometimes when we DID try to be more descriptive, we had to be extra cautious because the words could be interpreted very differently. You encounter this recording VO, too. A VO note says "hysterical" and you *meant* "really upset" but the actor read "scream like a banshee" Thus this caused problems, like I said. The artists would struggle, sometimes conjuring details just to give the character *something* but which would change the character... and, to us, the character was created. Done. We were already invested, probably already writing them. Something had to give. So this time we wrote a bunch of character briefs - but short. One paragraph. We stuck to vibes and the *emotions* we wanted the concepts to evoke. And we didn't name them. They got titles like "Slick Con Man" or "Ice Queen", so we wouldn't get too attached. Then we handed these off to the artists. And it worked nicely. The ones that just weren't inspiring we'd discard, no problem. The others had juice... and the artists felt free to play and offer lots of variations because we weren't set on anything yet. A lot of times, what they produced ended up inspiring US. It was a neat back-and-forth."

"This is what led to Dorian, in fact. He came from a short write-up entitled "Rock Star Mage" and it really boiled down to "I'm cool and I know I'm cool, so take that you cretins". And just like that, the first sketches (by Casper Konefal, I think? I bet I'm wrong) were all amazing. Instant fire. Me: "He looks kind of like... Freddie Mercury?" Him: "Is that bad?" Me: "NO ARE YOU KIDDING THIS IS AMAZING" Plus there was a monkey. Sadly, we had to lose the monkey. There were iterations to come, but this was really where Dorian was born: Tevinter mage, noble, savant, and too cool for school."

"When did he become gay? Not right away. Like I said elsewhere, we didn't talk romance and sexuality until after the concepts were more in place. But as we were brainstorming about why this hot shot mage left Tevinter, the idea DID come up that maybe it was because he was gay. Not directly, however. Homophobia isn't really a thing in Thedas, after all, so at first blush I didn't think that could work. "Rich kid gets kicked out of the house for being gay" wasn't a trope I wanted to explore. But, then again, magister families in Tevinter are *obsessed* with the appearance of perfection, so...? Any deviation from the "norm" is considered scandal-worthy. It said weakness. It said you couldn't control your house. Now... THAT had real promise. The writing pit discussed it a lot. So I think it's fair to say that the gay fairy was already circling Dorian even before we got to the romance talk. I think it's also fair to say that the rest of the team realized I low-key wanted to write him, because when everyone started calling dibs, who was left standing for me? (I pick last, remember.) I gleefully snatched him up and got to work... ...about six months later. I was very busy at the time. 😅 That late start meant I had to design and write VERY quickly. And I did. Somehow, though, this one... it came easily. "Catty gay man" isn't digging very deep, no surprise to anyone who knows me, and it had an extra layer of being so fun because Dorian was confident. He sparred verbally. I loved it."

"There was more to it, however. The conflict between Dorian and his father... ugh, how do I say this? Let's be clear: Dorian's story is not MY story, but it's also not far off. I wrote the entire confrontation scene in one go. After I was done, I probably cried harder than I ever have in my life. 🫠 I was unsure whether it was any good, however. I just didn't feel objective. I passed it over to Cori May - my friend but also Dorian's editor - and asked her to please tell me and be honest. She read it. She walked into my office after, tears streaming down her face, and just nodded. "It's good." Here's the thing. Not everyone is going to agree with this, but: I don't think a writer NEEDS to be a minority in order to write a minority. Sometimes those characters should simply exist, and we want them to. But if that character's story is ABOUT their experience as a minority? That's different. Dorian's story didn't need to revolve around his sexuality - and, honestly, it only did so as a tangent to his family issue, but they're so bound together it's probably irrelevant to split them - but my writing him meant it could be. It allowed me to SAY something. That felt good. It felt right. Ramon Tikaram came on board after a lengthy casting process (so many British Indian accents, oh god). I sat in on a few recording sessions... the confrontation scene, though? Ramon: *says line* Me: (curled up on a nearby sofa in fetal position) *shaky thumbs up* Caroline: "Yep. Great work, Ramon!""

"Dorian's sexuality isn't all he's about, but that's certainly how some viewed it. When the character was announced in 2014, his being gay was mentioned as the last of a number of points, and the instant response from some gamers was to act as if we'd called a press conference just to say THAT. 🙄 It was annoying. Still is. Overall, however, the reaction to Dorian was very positive. The number of straight men who said they romanced him still pleases me. The number of fans who privately contacted me who'd been through conversion therapy, some who said Dorian helped them survive? Well. Gosh. 😭 I did write him for Trespasser - though I hear that a late scope cut meant every conversation had been chopped by 1/3rd or more, and that meant a lot of nuance lost. Which is sad, if true, because it sounds like the result of that left some Dorian romancers a bit cold. Such is how game dev rolls. 😔 If you need more proof of how it was hard for me to let go of him, a short story I wrote after Trespasser came out where Dorian has a bit of closure with his dead father: medium.com/@davidgaider... So yeah. He'll always be my boi. And I'll always be thankful Bio gave me this opportunity. ❤️"

[source thread]

User: "I'm not going to lie, it's hard to take my mind off Dorian almost having a monkey." David Gaider: "If by “almost” you mean there was a picture of a monkey that the concept artist put there as a whim, and which would almost certainly have taken more cinematics and modeling time to put in than we could ever afford… then yes. 😉" [source]

#dragon age #bioware #long post #longpost #video games #lgbtq #homophobia cw #queerphobia cw

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shysublimecoffee · 2 months ago

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Marinette receiving the Ladybug mantle was an absolute mistake. I watched the special, and honestly, gurl is doing the most—and for what? A guy? One dude, and she’s ready to throw her common sense out the window. Like, how has Hawkmoth/Gabriel not used his own son more often as leverage against her by now? That’s villainy 101, and he’s just sitting on it. Like for the amount of times I've seen this show rag on ChatNoir because of his weakness in romance when that Ladybug biggest weakness not CN lol.

At this point, I don’t even care about what Marinette’s going through. Whatever emotional investment I had in her? Long gone. She’s out here spinning lies on top of lies, desperately trying to hold together her crumbling Adrien-obsessed empire, and for what? She lost. Game over.

Now, if this were a story about a girl slowly getting corrupted, spiraling into villainy, and intentionally written as a downfall arc? No problem. That would’ve been a compelling narrative with a real lesson for kids about the consequences of obsession and dishonesty. But nope, instead we’re stuck with this mess where her choices make it harder and harder to root for her.

Marinette's speech at the press conference—“Ladybug holds the truth, she holds the truth” —had me scratching my head cause it sound more like a villain then a hero. Like, did the writers forget she’s supposed to have hero-like qualities? She’s meant to be the messenger, the symbol of hope, the hero. But how often does she actually display that in her own show?

Lately, it feels like being Ladybug is more of an obligatory chore for her than something that brings her real joy or fulfillment. Isn’t the whole point of magical girls to inspire, to help others, and to grow through their journey? Where’s the sense of accomplishment, the spark, the joy of making a difference? It’s like they’ve stripped her of everything that should make her role uplifting and meaningful.

I've seen here and there about how MC was never meant to come off that way or the writers are trying to make her more complex or how dare you do you dislike complex female characters or the most used it was never her intention to come off that way it was a mistake.

I want you to picture this without the music just dialogue cause i'm going to be clearcut about this.

Ladybug went to an orphaned, grieving child—one who had been locked away in solitary confinement, surrounded by nothing but white walls and being sensory deprived—and lied to him about his father being a hero. Let that sink in. Gabriel, who systematically abused his own son, was painted as a noble martyr by Ladybug.

Adrien, a kid who was finally starting to question his father’s authority, even beginning to tear down the oppressive image of the man who controlled and hurt him, is now trapped in an even tighter mental cage. After all, if Paris sees his father as a hero, a savior, how could he possibly feel justified in blaming or resenting the man? Gabriel is now a martyr in the eyes of the world, and Adrien is left to wrestle with guilt and shame for ever having cruel thoughts about someone everyone else idolizes.

Ladybug’s decision to perpetuate this lie doesn’t just protect Gabriel’s image—it messes with Adrien’s already fragile mind. Instead of helping him heal or giving him the freedom to process the truth, she’s reinforced the very chains Gabriel used to control him. It’s not heroic; it’s delusional and harmful, all in the name of preserving some twisted version of peace in her head.

You want me to feel pity for a girl who I'm sorry if I sound harsh to yall at the end of the day just want to keep the peace to fill her delusions that everything is going to work out in her part at the end when really she's just the worst type of coward there is when it comes to confrontations lmao. Accountability? She avoids them like they’re some kind of plague. It’s almost impressive how someone can masquerade as a hero while being utterly incapable of facing the hard truths. Lmao, sure, let’s all pity her.

Honestly, in the earlier seasons, at least Marinette seemed to feel bad about her mistakes. Now? She’s only gotten worse. I headcanon that receiving the Ladybug mantle or becoming the Guardian inflated her ego, giving her a power trip. With no proper mentor to hold her accountable and everyone automatically deferring to her leadership, who’s left to challenge her? Well maybe CN if he has the guts to do so but he'd rather cower into his shell lol.

In hindsight, I don’t think Marinette should’ve become Ladybug—not because she lacks the capability, but because the role itself seems to have worsened her as a person. Instead of growing into the hero I though she was meant to be, she’s devolved, losing some of the humility and self-awareness she had at the start of the series.

Let’s be real—we’re in Season 6 now, and we all know the writers aren’t going to make Marinette face any real consequences. The whole universe bends over backward to accommodate her. If you’ve seen Season 5, you know exactly what I’m talking about.

That said, I’ll give credit where it’s due: the special was fun. Yes, despite all my ranting, I actually enjoyed it because it was funny in its own way.

At this point, though, I’m only sticking around for Adrien and Lila. Honestly? I’m rooting for Lila to be the one to drop the truth bomb and expose everything. It would be chef’s kiss poetic if she ended up being the one to set things straight. Lmao.

P.s For anyone who thinks there is a dilemma to be had about the whole thing its really not lol rip the bandaid off.

It reeks of a megalomaniac in the making, making her come off like a gaslighting psychopath. Ironically, it reminds me of Gabriel—especially with the way he used similar wording. Honestly, are we sure Marinette isn’t Gabriel’s true daughter? Because the parallels are man.

I’m genuinely angry that she is the one everyone feels sorry for, and it’s only because the show is stuck in her perspective. If we spent even a fraction of the screen time on Adrien’s pain, it would make for a far more compelling story. It’s infuriating. Marinette isn’t some helpless sheep/damsel victim here—no one forced her into this role at gunpoint. She made her choices, knowingly and willingly. How dare she act like the weight of the world was thrust upon her without her consent? When she very much messed with a grieving kid here?

And yet, Adrien’s pain—real, tangible, and far more tragic—is constantly sidelined. He’s an orphan, being lied to by nearly everyone around him, adults and teens alike, and his suffering is treated as a subplot to Marinette’s endless drama. Why should the audience feel more for her than for the boy who’s lost everything? Why is his pain has to be centered to her??

This isn't a small mistake this has far reaching consequences if the show had the balls to do it to lie to the entire world over a man who terrorized on people fear.

If Adrien ever became a villain, I wouldn’t blame him. In fact, I’d understand and give him the free ticket to go ahead and cataclysm and burned the world .

#miraculous ladybug #london at the edge of time #anti marinette #marinette critical #marinette salt

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iamyoursonly · 6 months ago

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Childhood Best Friend (16/07/2024)

turns out my bakugo obsession wasn’t over so i’m writing him to feed my delusions because I saw this one line on tumblr and I had to write a whole story about it; i wrote this at 2 AM so it’s not the most creative hehe but bear with me

1.5k words — unedited

The thought of having a childhood best friend that you can keep in contact with really drives me insane, not in a bad way though, because it’s the kind of friendship that I crave. I have no idea how much time both parties dedicate to each other to maintain a relationship for this long, and I might be jealous of some of my friends because they have this and mine isn’t as ideal as I hope it was.

“Katsu?” My five-year-old self say, “Would you marry me when we grow up?”

The crimson eyed boy looked at me, holding out that ring pop he’s been eating for a while now and basically finished, “If you’ll have me that is.”

According to his mom, I went around kindergarten holding his hand and calling him “my husband katsu” for a while, and he was always around to protect me when kids doubted what I said. He’d beat them up or threaten them with his explosions saying, “You’re all just jealous that you’re not her, but too bad she’s my wife now so piss off.”

I was always around him and he was always around me, we were literally stuck to the bone.

“Katsu, someone told me I was ugly is that true?” I cried in his arms for the first time when I was six, and he rubbed my head and let me cry it out.

“Whoever told you that must have no taste, you’re breathtaking.” He says.

“What does ‘breaktaking’ mean?” I say.

“Breathtaking. It means you’re so pretty you take someone’s breath away.” He smiles, “I’m also beating them up for putting this nonsense in your head. No one messes with my wife.”

“Don’t beat them up though, please?” I look at him, and his rubs my head and nod.

This all disappeared when I had to leave to move away because my parents found a better job. I held onto his hand and begged my parents to let me stay with him and his family, he also begged, claiming he doesn’t want to be apart from “his wife”.

“Don’t forget me, Katsu.” I start sobbing, “I really don’t want to leave.”

“Can’t you stay?” He asks, red staining his eyes because of the crying he has been doing.

“I can’t, they’re not letting me.” I hold his hand harder, “Promise we’ll meet again?”

“Let’s become heroes together. I’ll become number one and you’ll be alongside me.” He squeezes my hand back. “Let’s meet at UA.”

“Promise?” I ask.

“Promise.”

We pinky promised before my parents shoved me into the car and drove away.

“Hit harder, you’re not doing it right!” My coach screams at me. “Okay, take a break you’re not thinking.”

I sit on the ground, stripping off my boxing gear then throwing them to the ground, “Fuck.” How am I going to be good enough to catch up to him? He’s gifted, hardworking and talented. It’s not possible to be on the same level as him without training harder, and I’m not even hitting right…

“I’m done, let me do it again!” I say to my coach, who’s wiping the pads I’ve been hitting. She smiles and signals me to start. I throw I few punches at her, then a few kicks, and some more punches. “That’s the spirit, young lady!” She says as I throw more kicks at her.

“Good work today,” She pats my shoulder, “See you tomorrow.”

I smile at her before packing my bags and leaving, stretching a bit before I take a taxi home to revise for tomorrow morning’s tests. I take out the small notebook I keep in my bag and start memorizing some main points from the book, “Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell.” I whisper.

I manage to get a taxi, I get in and sit down and continue studying. After a while, I look out of the window, slowly rolling down the glass after getting the driver’s permission. Feeling the night air against my face, I start to feel home sick. It’s been ten years since I left Japan, and I’ve been doing everything he would just so I can get in UA. And I miss him so much.

“Congratulations! You’re accepted into UA high school, we’re looking forward to seeing you on our first day!“

I scream at this news before telling my parents and they were overjoyed also. They willingly bought me plane tickets back to Japan and even called Katsuki’s family to have them take care of me for the mean time, in which they agreed to. And all I could think about that night was how happy he would be when he sees me again.

He was not happy, at least I don’t think he is. He has this scowl over his face and he’s gotten so tall and buff since ten years ago.

“You’re that loser girl I hung out with? I literally have no fuckin’ memory of you since you’re so fuckin’ insignificant to me.”

Wow. He’s definitely changed so much.

“Katsu, I kept my promise, I got into UA and now I’m back.” I say.

“So? What do you want me to say? Congrats? Yeah no shit, everyone craves validation when it comes to me.” He says, “Congrats loser, for making the bare minimum to get in like it’s fuckin’ challenging.”

Okay he’s just rude now, where was that sweet old Katsuki I missed. So I just rolled my eyes at him and went to their guest room to settle down. In which Mitsuki welcomed me with a whole party that Katsuki was not happy about.

New school year, new me. I wear my UA uniform, ready for a new school year with more fun and joy every year. Until some weird guy stopped me and Katsuki on our way to school.

“Hey girlie, you look so fine you should be called mine. Wanna go out with me?” He winks, and I cringed at him. Katsuki full on glared at him, looking pissed.

“She doesn’t wanna fuckin’ go out with you, why would she downgrade herself for a fucker like you?” Katsuki grabbed my hand and started leaving.

He told him off for me. He cares.

“Why are you even helping that whore?” That weirdo asked Katsuki, and he glared daggers into him.

“No one can say that to her when I’m around, say that again and you’ll lose your dick.” Katsuki threatens him again and wraps his arms around my waist.

He turns to me, his face so close to mine before he says, “Let’s go.”

Since when was his face so masculine and defined. He definitely had a big glow up because how could one be so breathtaking?

“Katsu.” I say, “What was that for? Thought you hated me.”

“Still do, but only I can degrade you.” He answers.

“Possessive much?” I joke, but I could feel his grip on my waist tighten. So I just shut up and walk with him.

When we got home that day, Mitsuki made us fried chicken and some extra spicy mapo tofu (katsu’s favourite).

“Remember when the two of you got married when you were five? Katsuki gave you his ring pop after you asked him if he’d marry you and he said something like ‘if you’ll have me’? Oh goodness I remember it like it was yesterday.” She chuckled with her husband as Katsuki and I stared at each other awkwardly.

“Shut up you old hag.” Katsuki says, his ears red, “I’m going back to my room.”

Before he leaves the table, he drags me with him and we enter his room before he locks the door.

“So,” He starts, “What now?”

I look at him, “You dragged me in, you tell me.”

“It’s nothing I just needed a break from them.” He shrugged, “It’s not like I’m fuckin’ embarrassed of us or anything.”

There was a moment of loud silence.

“Katsu,” I break the awkwardness, “Can we like start again?”

“Like what, pretend that you never left me?” He says, his tone sounded like he’s hurt.

“I didn’t want to, and you know it.” I look him in the eye, and he keeps the eye contact.

“Missed you so fuckin’ much and now you’re here,” He puts his head on my shoulder, basically whispering into my ear, “I hate how you’re my weak spot and how I can’t properly get over you even though we were basically children.”

“Katsuki, listen.” I hold his face and he’s so close to me I could feel his breath on my face.

“Yeah?” He looks at me, features softening.

“Be my boyfriend, Katsuki.” I murmured softly, “For real this time. I swear the only person I’ve loved is you.”

He laughed out loud, “Thought we were married all along, wifey.”

I hug him tight and he speaks, “Don’t leave me again okay?”

“Promise.” I chuckled, “Also you need to get me another ring, I might have left the ring pop with my family.”

“You silly bitch. You’re lucky I love you.” He gently smacks me.

“And I love you too.” I smile.

…“And now, I pronounce the two of you husband and wife.”

Maybe this childhood best friend thing that I had wasn’t that bad either, seeing how we have two children together right now makes me smile at our memories together as a child. My breathtaking childhood best friend and the pro hero Dynamight that I could call my husband until the end of time.

#mha bakugou #bakugou katsuki x reader #bakugo katsuki #bakugo #bakugou x reader #bnha #my hero academia #drabble #nah #katsuki bakugo x reader #bakugo katsuki x reader #i love him so much #bakugo katuski #bakugou katsuki #bnha bakugou #bnha bakugo katsuki #katsuki bakugo mha #bakugou x you

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inlovewithquestionablecharacters · 6 months ago

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Hi,

I just stumbled upon your blog and I am already obsessed with your stories.🥰 Your writing style and the way you describe the characters is simply amazing.

Anyways, I‘ve got an idea for a one-shot, could you please write one, where the reader is Dr.Lecters patient and they bump into a very distraught Will after his session and start talking to him. Hannibal get‘s jealous, because he thinks Will is interested in the reader,after the conversation ended, tension is really high during her sessions and it get‘s steamy in the end.(nsfw?)

Hannibal x Reader: What's mine is mine

Warning: smut, oral ( f receiving), no use of y/n, penetration ( p in v), possessive behavior, jealous Hannibal, anger, not proofread, gn reader, female anatomy.

Word count: 1,2 K

“What was that?”

“What was what?”

“I've told you a thousand times that that door is for exiting clients only and you continue to use it.”

“Oh come on Hannibal you know how i hate using the other door. That empty waiting room always puts me on edge.”

“And talking with another patient is prohibited, you know that.”

You spin on your heels, angrily looking at your therapist.

“For the love of god hannibal! Did you see what he looked like? He was shaking so much I thought he was having some sort of seizure!”

You’d stumbled onto a very distressed will on your way into your appointment and simply couldn’t feel like you needed to help him.

“I'm surprised you let him leave at all. That man was a complete wreck.”

“It is my job to know what my clients need.”

“Clearly you're not doing it very well.”

You could tell you’d hit a nerve because instead of debating you Hannibal simply closed the door and stomped over to his chair. You shook your head. You didn’t understand why Hannibal was so worked up about you talking to Will. It’s not like you’d done anything wrong.

And the truth was you hadn't done anything wrong. If anything you’d shown you were an empathetic person. You weren’t the issue. Will was. Or more accurately, Hannibal's jealousy of Will was. Seeing you talk to Will had sent Hannibal into a sort of spiral. In his mind you belong to him but in reality you don't.

“Okay what the hell is up with you?”

“I don’t know what you mean.”

“Oh so is your face just stuck like that now? You gonna give me the stink eye for the rest of the session? I mean come on! You’re acting like you caught me kissing him.”

Hannibal's body tensed at your words. He forced himself to open his mouth.

“Did you want to?”

“What?”

“Did you want to kiss him?”

“Oh for fucks sake what does that have to-”

“Answer the question.”

Hannibal had risen from his seat. He walked over to you boxing you against him and the wall behind you. You looked up at him staring into his eyes. Hannibal was so close to you that you could smell his perfume. You took a shaky breath in.

“No.”

“What?”

“No, I didn't want to kiss him. I’m not interested in him.”

No in him but in someone. That's what your words sounded like to Hannibal. He desperately needed to find out who you were interested in. Even if it meant having to get them out of his way.

“Who then?”

“You’re kidding right?”

Hannibal continued to stare at you as he awaited you to answer his question. You shook your head at him.

“You’re such an idiot.”

You pushed forward, hitting Hannibal's shoulder with yours as you moved away from him. Hannibal grabbed your wrist, stopping you from getting too far.

“Who?”

You tugged your arm out of his grip, turning to face him. You looked pissed, it caught Hannibal off guard.

“You! It’s you, you ass!”

Hannibal stared at you. You’d never yelled at him before. He felt rooted to his spot. He barely noticed you moving forward before you were tugging his tie. You gave him a bruising kiss. He moved to wind his hand around your waist but before he could you pushed off him.

“There. Satisfied?”

No. He would never be satisfied. He could still taste you on his tongue. And the taste was addicting. He surged forward grabbing your head with his hand. He shoved his mouth against yours, kissing you roughly. You let him, your hands moving to grip his suit jacket. The two of you stumbled across the room, hands wildly pulling at each other's clothes. Somewhere in the middle of the process you’d managed to unbutton Hannibal's shirt and he’d managed to remove your pants. Your body fell onto the loveseat, hand moving to tug Hannibal on top of you. He kissed at your skin, his hand moving to shove your shirt up. You gasped as his hands cupped your breast, kneading them in his hand.

“Oh Hannibal!”

God he loved the way you sounded, gasping his name. He placed a kiss to the valley of your breasts before insching himself lower. He placed small kisses all over your stomach. You watched him with glazed eyes, observing him until he was on his knees before you. He tugs your underwear off your body, moving to place it in his back pocket. You raise your eyebrows to him and all he does is shrug. You squeal as Hannibal tugs you closer to him. He leaned his head down until he’s inches from your pussy. You bite your lip in anticipation. As soon as Hannibal's tongue makes its way to your fold you can’t help but throw your head back. Hannibal grips onto your thighs as you squirm against the loveseat.

“Oh fuck. There! Hannibal there- shit!”

Hannibal grinned against your pussy, reveling in the way your hand grabs onto his hair in desperation. His fingers moved inside you, helping his tongue in his task to make you cum. You could feel yourself clenching around Hannibal's fingers, silently telling him you were close. If that wasn’t enough the high pitched moans you kept letting out should have been a sign. Hannibal sucked at your clit and you were a goner. Your hand gripped onto the love seat as you came. Hannibal watched you breath for a moment before beginning to climb over you. You tugged him down for a kiss, tugging at his hair. He bit your lip in return.

Hannibal's dick nudged against your thigh, his pre cum mixing with your own juices. You smiled up at him, wrapping your legs around him. Hannibal took the hint, moving to align his dick with your entrance. He glanced at you for a moment, awaiting your approval. You gave him a small nod. He moved slowly into you. Once he’d bottomed out Hannibal stopped moving, giving you time to adjust. You opened your mouth in a silent moan, brows furrowing as you felt Hannibal twitch inside you. He desperately wanted to move but he would wait for you okay.

“Jesus Hannibal, what are you waiting for? Move!”

Well that was one way to put it.

Hannibal began to thrust into you, his movements growing more rapid as your pleasure increased. He placed one of his feet on the ground, attempting to give himself more strength. You drew a breath in as he rocked into you rapidly. Hannibal leaned down tugging one of your breasts into his mouth. He sucked at your nipple, making sure to leave a mark. From the way you clenched around him he could tell you enjoyed it so he continued his ministrations.

“Are you almost there?”

“Uhum please don’t stop-fuck-please i’m…”

Your eyes rolled to the back of your head, fingers digging into Hannibal's shoulder as you came. Hannibal felt you sag beneath him, taking it as his chance to guide your movements. His hands found your hips gripping them tightly as his thrusts began to flatter. Pretty soon Hannibal seed spilled into your walls. He laid down beside you, pulling your body closer into his.

“Remind me to make you angry more often.”

“Careful dear. That's a dangerous game.”

“Maybe that's how I like it.”

#smut #smut fanfiction #smut tag #hannibal fanfiction #hannibal lecter #hannibal tv show #hannibal #nbc hannibal #mads mikkelsen smut #mads mikkleson #mads mikkelsen x reader #mads x reader #mads mikkelsen #hannibal x reader #hannibal x you

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lilolilyr · 6 days ago

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~ Lilo's 2024 Star Wars recs ~ (another Ao3 year in review)

This is specifically the star wars edition of my reader year in review, the rest & more info can be found here!

Descriptions/summaries by me, click the links for the ones from the authors.

The Good Sith by sonnyrain - Obi-Wan Kenobi and all of the Vod'e time travel and end up on a Sith planet. Obi-Wan, now 'Aranar', turns to the dark side, swearing to protect his men no matter the cost. Over a million words, lots of plot and character developments, fix-everything, still ongoing as of mid last year but you can read the first part(s) on their own.

I love this fic a ridiculous amount, I read several parts at least twice, and I'm thinking about it constantly. Like, when I think up my plotless little fluff piece fix everything bedtime stories I think up to fall asleep (and sometimes when something's good have to forego sleep to write down immediately because I know I won't remember fuckall come morning), I think of the versions of the characters from that 'verse just as often as I think of canon star wars characters or ones from any other fics. It fits into my headcanon 'verse really well because I always work with multiverse settings, and I love the kid characters especially little Sithling Aurek and his twin Soul.

Knives and Spices by argentee, mikaiyawa and others: A whole group of humans from earth is kidnapped into the Star Wars world, and separate fics follow separate characters. One becomes Mandalorian, one a pop star, yet another befriends some pirates and travels to lands we've never seen in canon. 280k, ratings and warnings vary, series still ongoing, parts can be read separately

I love and adore all kinds of self insert stories but this one is just extra levels of amazing - it's basically humans are space orcs meets Star Wars, and humans are all a bit force sensitive - the ending of the series summary describes it perfectly: "how much trouble can a few humans cause? All of it. All the trouble." and I love it all to bits!

Like a Tree by the River by @bairnsidhe - at Galidraan, Komari has a vision of the canon future and decides that she'd rather leave the Jedi behind than be a part of that massacre. Somehow, this ends with her and Dooku being adopted by mandalorians, and her in turn kind of adopting teenaged Obi-Wan at Melida/Daan? 20k T

Idk, this isn't even such a long one and I mean all of BairnSidhe's works I've read are great but somehow specifically this one with Dooku being the 'a bit old' ad and Komari therefore the bu'ad of a random coruscanti Mandalorian just stuck with me and I sometimes randomly think of Dooku being all confused and have to smile xD the plot&writing is also really good!

How a Romance Novel Saved the Galaxy by @arianaderalte: The mandos get their hands on a novel that describes a romance between mandalorians and jedi, and just how perfect jedi really are as partners for mandalorians... This changes things when both groups interact irl. 200k, rated T, Violence

This series has Everything. Jedi, Mandalorians, action, relationships, all kinds of queerness, and excerpts from a romance novel about the ancient Sith wars. Honestly, this fic just couldn't be better! I binge-read through it in one go even though I should have done a million other things at the time and I didn't regret it one bit xD

All the Amavikka stories: the slaves on Tatooine have a separate secret culture with language, myths and names, and Anakin, coming from this culture, reacts to Palpatine being his newest slave master

I think this idea of Tatooine slave culture and of Anakin's characterization is so interesting and I love reading it, from long Double Agent Vader by @fialleril, which I think is the original fic creating the Ekkreth lore, over the ongoing series Biting His Own Tale by @adragonsfriend, to the short story I can't find anymore about depur erecting a tower, a song-fic to Babylon by Dirt Poor Robin and the reason for my obsession with that band - please, if anyone has a link, send it my way! - and all other fics, I love this trope so much!

I think Ekkreth Skywalker was one of the first trope rabbit holes I stumbled into when I got really into Star Wars longfics in the middle of 2024, and I'm always excited to see references to it in fics mainly about other characters as well, like Breaking Chains by @jehanneargentee, and I went back to (re)reading fics about the trope on purpose several times as well :)

The last fic leads neatly into the next trope I really loved this year, Time Travel stories, more specifically Obi-Wan Kenobi time travelling and meeting mandalorians :D

I don't really have more specific stories for this one, I read so so so many of them that they just blur together in my mind. I marked a couple with the Ao3 rec function so I assume I liked those especially much, but going through them now I still don't really remember much, but I do recognize a couple fic author names as authors I read many good fics from, Ariel_Sojourner AppoApples @batshieroglyphics @roosjem LeeTheHobbit @triscribe cjwritesfanficnow @laurabwrites y'all's are awesome! Everyone, go check out all their fics!

I do also read and enjoy stories where people other than Obi-Wan travel through time, one that really stuck with me is In Good Time by morwen_of_gondor, about the Mandalorian trainers Kal Skirata and Walon Vau time travelling back to their time on Kamino.

All the fluffy h/c, fix-it, everyone lives, no order 66 Clone Wars fics! Pro-jedi, pro-clones, anti-sith (which sometimes includes Anakin, sometimes not), usually focusing on the 212th.

I never watched the series and it's been ages since I watched Attack of the Clones, but somehow, probably on the time travel -> Obi-Wan fics -> General Kenobi pipeline, I ended up reading a loooot of clone wars (fix it) fic, specifically lots and lots of Codywan!

You know that lovely feeling of getting into a new fandom without having any preconceived notions or otps or anything, so you can read All The Fic without any ships or bashing squicking you out? Yeah, that was me in Star Wars several months ago, cursed be the Codywan that got to me xD I can barely read time travel fics anymore without mourning the existence of the Vod'e because changing the past usually means they won't be created (unless they're the ones time travelling of course. Love those fics) and where I used to read just about anyone x Obi-Wan (and also anyone x anybody else lmao), I'm not pretty exclusively into Codywan... That being said, there's a reason for that, and that's the amount of amazing fics for that ship that I came across!

Again, I don't have specific fics that I remember because I just read so many one after the other... I guess I'll have to re-read them all. Which is great actually because me not remembering them much means I can reread them basically for the first time! I did mark some as rec but looking through them now I think they're not mainly recced for the codywan... My shippy bookmark tag might give a better overview.

Another ship I got into was clone troopers Waxer x Boil, I like the thought of the Vod'e being a society of to outsiders identical looking but to each other separate people who only see their immediate batchmates as siblings (which would also psychologically make a lot more sense), and these two are just super cute.

One of the first Waxer/Boil fics I read is also Codywan and it's one of these clones&Obi-Wan time travel fics I like so much :D The 212th Attack Battalion's Guide to Saving the Galaxy by Accident by @antigrav-vector and @quarra, it also has some Dooku/Sifo-Dyas which is another ship I really like.

Another one I still want to continue reading is RCAU: Open Skies mainly by @cacodaemonia, what I've seen of it so far is great and the story is So Long (almost 900k, a honestly daunting wordcount and probably what made me procrastinate continuing it, but also Awesome because So Much Fic), it's cute and shippy and no order 66 but also has plot and interesting characters and ocs and I just love it <3

Also similar but less ship centric, I absolutely love all the fics where Fox gets to kill Palpatine. Just, best trope ever. The Corrie Guard deserves a little Sith Murder. As a treat.

Jaster Mereel and his haat'ade (True Mandalorians), there are a bunch of really good ones where they rescue Obi-Wan and the Young from Melidaan, but also in general all the Jaster fics are great!

While I'm very anti guns irl I just love the fictional Mandalorian culture xD with their cool armor and their codex and the language (per my last count I know 90 words of Mando'a just from fic reading osmosis, send me an ask if you want a list lmao), the vibrant culture created by it being a creed, not one species... and Jaster is just my favorite Mando'ad ever, maybe because he doesn't have much canon attached so fanon just went wild? xD there are also a bunch of jedi shippy fics with him and Dooku sometimes in ot3 with Sifo-Dyas, or him and Jon Antilles like the wonderful 100k wip trade your heart for bones to know by @blackkatmagic, and I think there was one with time travelling adult Obi-Wan as well - edit: yes several, by @roosjem @cjwritesfanficnow @batshieroglyphics <3

Skywalker Family Values by Ariel_Sojourner: Sith-son Luke and senator daughter Leia end up in the same summer camp, it ends in a destruction of the speciist camp, a rebellious theatre performance and the reintroduction of their parents... Aka the parent trap/ Doppelte Lottchen AU that is still somehow perfectly in tune with the Star Wars world! 55k, T for violence.

Can't forget the fic that actually got me into Star Wars! At least I'm pretty sure this is the one? I think there was a tumblr post talking about crackfic ideas for a parent trap AU, and I went looking and found this one, which is actually 100% serious and such a good read. I actually made my mom read it as well xD Das Doppelte Lottchen (German original parent trap book from 1949) was one of our favs for her to read to me when I was a kid, and my mom is always looking for new reading material and as I'm mainly reading fanfic, I'm always happy to find fic she'll also like.

And, because I turn everything into a tag meme, maybe some of you also want to show your appreciation for the writers who got us through the last year - everyone who sees this, feel free to make your own post (if it's just Star wars fic I guess you can reblog-add to this one, but otherwise seriously make your own post)! and remember to leave your authors some comments especially if they can't be @-ed on tumblr :) tagging all the authors already tagged above and everyone else who sees this!

here's my 2024 rec list for other fandoms

more of my fic recs • my writing • my Star Wars • Star Wars fic recs

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jazziejax · 7 months ago

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𝐀𝐛𝐛𝐨𝐭𝐭 𝐄𝐥𝐞𝐦𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐲

𝐌𝐬.𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐥

Pairings- Black!OC x Abbott Elementary Cast, later Black!OC x Manny (Can be read as x Reader though!)

Summary- Pilot Episode Experience with Naoya Lovel

Warnings- Swearing, kids, mixed race reader( those aren’t warnings really, just what to expect)

Jazzie’sNotes!- let me know what you guys think!! I’ve been really obsessed with Abbott Elementary recently and I’m contemplating if I want to write S1&S2 just to get to the Manny season. I want to get there fast but I know what won’t be possible with two seasons worth of writing. Let me know what you guys think I should do.

Word Count- 6,358

“Okay, so you wouldn't put the number on the bottom because that's what?” The older woman asked, drawing out her words as she stood in front of her fourth-grade class, pointing at the whiteboard behind her with her yardstick.

“The denominator.” The class answered.

“Correct, and what do we call the one on top?”

“The numerator.”

“Yes! You guys are killing this lesson.” She smiled as she placed her hands on her hips. She caught the camera crew in the corner of her eyes and then turned to them. “Or should I say I’m killing this lesson?” She smirked, flipping her hair over her shoulder as she posed. It was silent for a moment as they all watched her just smile.

“Wouldn’t you agree?” She’s asked, looking at one of the guys behind the camera. He nodded, moving the camera along with him, causing her to smile and adjust her glasses. “Why, thank you.”

“Hello! My name is Naoya Lovel. Pronounced Now-Ya, it’s Japanese because I’m half Japanese. Don’t ask why I’m half Japanese in Philly, it’s a long story.” She sighed as she shook her head.

“Well, actually, let me tell you the story because it’s actually kind of crazy.” She chuckled, starting to explain, but it then cut to another clip of her in the class.

“Ms.Lovel, we ran out of paper towels.” A student said, standing in front of her desk with paint on the palms of his hands. Noaya looked up, at him, a slight frown on her face. “Ohh, okay, well I have some in my desk.” She started, pulling open her desk drawer. The camera angled down to catch the empty towel box staring back at her. She smirked up at them awkwardly and shrugged her shoulders. “What, I have a constant runny nose.”

“As a teacher, you teach kids how to solve problems while solving your own. In your personal life and at school. And in this school, there are a lot.”

“Ms.Lovel, I need paper towels too.” Another student said, showing her blue and pink palms to her teacher. Noaya then stood from her seat, looking around her room. “Okay, okay class. Give me one sec.” She said, nervously looking around her room to solve her paper towel problem. She the. Saw a stray beach towel near the window on her small bookshelf. “Oh! Here we are, guys.” She said, rushing over to the towel and snatching it up.

“This could be a lesson too.” She smiled excitedly and grabbed a pair of large scissors from her desk. “I probably shouldn’t have these just sitting out.” She mumbled to herself, giving the camera a sideways glance. “So class, this is going to be a hands-on moment. If there are almost thirty of you, how many pieces would I need to cut this into for you guys to share?” She asked, looking at all of them. There was a moment before anyone said anything, the kids thinking over their answer. Then, some of their hands shot up. Naoya flashed the cameras behind her a quick smile before turning back to the kids.

“Noaya, Jacob, and I came in last year with 20 other teachers. We’re three of the four left so…trauma bonding, I guess?” Janine said, in regards to the other girl.

“Yeah, I taught for two years before I got here, I transferred from Addington to here because those people are a bunch of stuck-up freaks who are just in it for a little extra on their check.” She said with a smirk. “And that’s not what I’m here for, I’m here to change lives.” She boated, folding her arms.

“Hey, Melissa, can you please tell “Ta-Nehisi Quotes” here that “white boy” is a term of endearment from the corner store people?” Janie said as she walked into the break room on the second floor.

“Ooh, cheese steaks?” Naoya questioned as she looked up from her papers, knowing the full situation after only hearing the words ‘white boy’ and ‘corner store’.”

“For Zach Ertz, yeah.” Melissa started, turning around with a fresh cup of coffee in her hands. “For him. It’s an insult.” She smirked, then paused at the sight of the cameras in her face.

“Well, you guys, I need a new rug. Mine is officially done.” Janie said.” Coming take a seat right next to the working woman.

“Mhmm! Me too.” Jacob started, taking a seat on the other side of her. “I shook mine out and all the asthma kids had to go to the nurse's office.” This conversation caused her to raise her head, placing her work aside and adjusting her glasses as she listened.

“Yeah, mine’s busted.” Melissa started. “And you can’t class up a rug like you can a couch with a nice coat of plastic.”

“You guys have rugs? All we have is a little mat.” Naoya started, looking between all of them. They all cringed at her words, but couldn’t say more before someone’s loud voice cut through the air.

“Hey-yo! What it does, baby-boo?” Ava yelled as she walked into the break room and over to where they were sitting. “What yall think about this little film crew I bought in here.”

“Distracting makes our jobs harder,” Melissa said disinterestedly, shooting the crew a glare.

“I wish I would have known this was going to be a video thing, I would have made myself look better,” Naoya mumbled, causing the camera to turn her way. She smiled, making her face appear happier than usual.

“But exciting. We about to be on TV.” Ava said, looking between them all.

“Because they are covering underfunded, loosely managed, public schools in America.” Barbra interrupted in a matter-of-fact tone.

“No press is bad press, Barb.” Ava practically disregarded the woman’s claim, continuing to smile at the camera. “Look at Mel Gibson. Still thriving.” She laughed. “ “Daddy’s Home 2”? Hilarious!” She looked around the room, either expecting people to laugh with or or just so confined in her large ego that she didn’t care if they laughed or not.

“Ava’s the worst person I know,” Noaya stated. “I’ve never seen her show an ounce of care about anything other than money. Which is a terrible mindset to have as a principal because you’re literally in the brokeest position of power.”

“There you are.” Ms.Schwartz sighed as she rushed into the room, spotting Ava. “Ava, can I talk to you?” The woman was out of breath as she stood before the principal, and her attire was disheveled. “I-I need an aid. I’m outnumbered there. The kids are crazy.” She ranted this wild look in her eyes. “One of the kids told me to ‘mind my six’ this morning, I don’t know what that means! I need help!” She ranted. Ava placed and hand on her shoulder.

“Calm down.” The darker woman said, cutting Ms. Schwartz off. “They’re just kids. And, besides, aids cost money, and we don’t have that.” She said before flashing a quick smile at the cameras. “Right, but I just—” Ms. Schwartz started again.

“Do you want to split your salary with somebody else?” Ava asked, leaning closer and angling both of them away from the cameras.

“No.” The other woman said dejected.

“No!” Ava cut her off before she could continue to rant. “No, I didn’t think so.”

“Well, if we can’t get aides, maybe we can get new rugs?” Janine chimed up, standing from her seat.

“All I’m hearing is “new, new, new, need, need, need,” Ava answered. “And yet, Barb, one of our best and most senior teachers here.” She continued, walking over to the older woman who sat at the table with Melissa and drank her coffee. “She never complains. What is your secret, Barb?”

“Knowing there’s not much you can do, Ava.” The woman said with a sarcastic smile. But Ava didn’t care to hear her condescending tone.

“So understanding.” The principal smiled, looking around the room. “Be like Ms.Howard, people.” That was all she said before she left the room.

Noaya shook her head as she started to collect her things, knowing the bell would be ringing anytime soon.

“But, I’m not Ms.Howard.” Ms.Schwartz cried from where she stood.

“Ohh, Tina, look.” Janine started, walking over to the stressed woman. “Try some counting exercises, between one and forty the kids start to quiet down.” The other woman gave a slight nod before she exited the room, still in obvious distress. “You, know, a little support might help make things happen, ladies,” Janie said, turning around to face the older two women in the room.

“My support was gonna do about as much as that five-year-old bra you’ve got on right there,” Barbra said as she pushed in her chair. The camera then cuts to Naoya staring at the camera, her jaw clenched. Janine looked down at her chest for a slip second, before covering it up with her sweater and deciding to ignore the woman’s bra statement. “Hey, it’s not impossible to get things. Melissa asked for those new toy cash registers for her classroom and got them.”

“Yeah, those aren’t toys.” The Italian woman stared as she put on her coat. “I know a guy who wired a Walmart demolition. I got a guy for everything. I know a guy right now working on the stadium build. Need rebar?” She asked, looking around the room.

Noya just shook her head.

“No,” Janine answered.

“Melissa is resourceful, capable.” Ms. Howard started, looking between all the younger teachers. Naoya’shead jerked back at what she was insinuating but before she could say anything, Janine placed a hand on her shoulder and started talking.

“Well, I think the younger teachers are capable.”

“Really? Then why is it that Ms.Schwartz’s hair is falling out? Why does Jacob here need a smoking break every five minutes?” The woman sassed, gesturing over to the male beside her.

“I switched to an herbal vape.” He tried to defend himself.

“And why can’t any of you stick it out longer than two years? More turnovers than a bakery.” She hissed before her and Melissa walked out of the door. Once it shut behind them, Naoya turned to her friends beside her.

“I almost lose my job every day dealing with the people here.” She shook her head, resting her butt on the table behind her, the other two following suit.

“You know what? Hell, I think we should still try for rugs.” Jacob’s said.

“Yeah.” Janine agreed.

“You know, before I taught here, I was in Zimbabwe.” Jacob started, causing Noaya to stand up completely and begin to walk to the door. “I was going Teachers Without Boarders, and what I learned—.”

“Jacob.” Noaya cut in, turning to face the two of them. “What did we say you about, like, not talking about your time in Africa?” She said, gesturing between her and Janine. The boy stuttered, trying to come up with an appropriate answer.

“We told you to stop. Yeah, it’s weird.” Janine finished, looking over at the male.

“I have an immense amount of respect for my elders, including the ones I work with.” Naoya smiled at the cameras. “But Mrs.Howard has a smart mouth on her. A mouth that has never been directed at me.” She continued to smile, although strained, and raised her hands in mock defense. “But the day it is the day I got to prison.” And although she was finished, she was cut off by the sound of quick hurried footsteps making their way around the corner. She turned around just in time to catch Janine with a student.

“Noaya, come quick, there’s a fight.” The older woman got out as best as she could, although out of breath. Naoya ran around the corner, practically leaving the child and shirt woman in the dust.

“Damn, she’s fast,” Janine said, briefing glancing at the kids next to her before rushing to follow the running woman.

“What the hell is going on here?” Naoya yelled as she entered the hectic scene with a bat in her hands. She saw the crazed look the teachers were giving her and she shrugged. “I heard there was a fight, I brought it just in case.”

“Where did you get that? I was right behind you.” Janie asked, out of breath with her hands on her knees.

“I didn’t know she had it in her like that.” Melissa nodded a proud smirk on her lips. “I like her.”

“That’s beside the point, what happened?” Naoya asked, looking at the older white woman standing in front of a child. “He hit me first!” Ms.Schwartz said, pointing at the boy across from her.

“Liar!” The boy yelled back at her, being held back by Ms.Howard.

“I’m a liar? I'M A LIAR?” Ms.Schwartz asked a crazed look in her eyes, her gaze solely trained on the little boy.

“I can’t believe she hit a kid,” Noaya said, shock written all over her face as she folded her arms. “I mean, I threaten that I will but I never actually do it.” She shrugged.

“Okay!” Ava yelled, interrupting the conversation between the small group of teachers. “So, not good. Ms.Schwartz was out of line and clearly didn’t know how to handle her class.” The woman sighed.

“You hired her.” Melissa spat back.

“And fired her,” Ava responded. “They give me a lot of power around here. It’s crazy.” The woman smirked.

Melissa and Noaya both gave the camera a look of disbelief.

“In the meantime, Mr.Johnson will be watching her class.” Ava finished.

“Mr.Johnson the janitor?” Naoya spoke up. “Our conspiracy theorist janitor? Teaching social studies? Do we not see the problem with this?” She asked, looking around at the group.

“I think maybe we should alert the school district to this,” Jacob spoke up, getting spins of approval from the rest. “I mean, a child was harmed.” He tried to finish before Ava cut in.

“Hey! Harmed?” She questioned. “I handled this. No need to let them know that a child was harmed on my wa—” She stopped, remembering that she was being recorded, and looked towards the camera. “On the school's watch, to be clear.” She clarified.

“Ava, this is not handled,” Janine spoke up. “There is a 70-year-old custodian who voted for Kanye teaching social studies right now.” The woman stressed, pointing down the hall. “We need help. Look, I know we don’t have any money—“

“Okay!” Ava cut her off. “Alright. I’ll make a small emergency budget request to the district, and then you guys can get pencils and hire aides or whatever else you need.”

“So, even rugs?” Janine asked her entire demeanor from earlier changing at the woman’s words.

“Sure! Just email a request.” Ava replied.

“Okay! I can- I can write an email.” Janine smiled excitedly.”

“Another day in principal life.” Ava smiled at the cameras before walking away, horribly singing some old song. “I believe the children are our future.”

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“Um…Hello?” An unfamiliar voice called out as she came into the school building, making their way to stand in front of the desk. “I’m looking for Ms.Coleman.” The man said. Melissa looked up at him. “Oh, yeah she’s—“ She was cut off by Ava rushing up next to her.

“Hello.” Again said flirtatiously, looking the man up and down.

“Hi, I’m Gregory Eddie. I’m the sun for the teacher who, uh…” He trailed off, looking down at the papers he pulled from his briefcase. “Pinter a student.” The man said worriedly, looking back up at her.

“Oh! You’re the sub.” Ava said. “Forgive me, I thought one of my colleagues here hired a stripper for me.” Ava laughed off, dismissing the looks Melissa and Barbra gave her. “Okay.” That was all Gregory could say to that, giving the woman obvious judgmental looks.

“Nice to meet you, young man.” Barbra offered him a kind smile.

“Yeah, nice to meet you, Ryan,” Melissa said, staring at the together papers.

“It’s Gregory.”

“Eh, let’s see how long you’ll be here.” She said, only flexing up after she was done stapling. “Then I’ll remember your name. Okay, Tim?”

Gregory didn’t even have time to fully digest the interactions he just had with the women before him before Jacob came around the corner. “Yes!” He smiled, stalking up to the man. “My dude.” He said, arms open for some sort of hug but was cut short by Gregory putting his hand out. “Oh, yeah,” Jacob said, placing his hand on the one offered out to him. “Keeping it profesh. I like that.” He smiled, leaning against the counter. “I’m Jacob. It’s nice to see another male teacher in here. It’s not a lot of us. Hey, now I got somebody to talk sports with. You like women’s tennis?” The paler man asked, before shooting the camera a sideways glance. “Or, as I call it, you know, regular tennis.”

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Naoya was walking the halls, whistling a tune with her bad over her shoulders when she came across a tall, good-looking man in a gray sweater. Hearing her, the man turned around to see a tall, light-skinned woman with a large, light brown puff ponytail at the back of her head. She had on specs that covered most of her face, enlarging her eyes. She was dressed in a slightly baggy pair of dark wash denim jeans with brown shoes that matched the brown in her green sweater, paired with a white shirt underneath. Seeing the mysterious man, she furrowed her brows at him from down the hall.

“Uh, hello.” The man waved awkwardly from down the hall.

Naoya waved back as she made her way closer to the man. “Uh, hi. Are you lost?” She asked, slowing down when she got in front of him. “In a school building?…And smelling like pee and/or vomit. I’m calling security.” She started to back up and pull out her phone, or even yell before she stopped and frowned. “Oh wait, I am security.” She said, moving her bat to her good hand getting ready to swing.

“Wait!” The man yelled, sticking out his hands in defense. “I’m a sub! I’m here to fill in for the woman who kicked the kid.” He defended.

Naoya visibly relaxed as she looked the man up and down, taking in his formal attire. “Okay.” She said, dropping her defensive pose. “That still doesn’t explain the smell.” She said, giving the man a disgusted once over. Gregory stuttered to get an answer, embarrassed by the cameras and such an awkward situation in front of another beautiful woman.

“It’s a long story. A broken toilet, a student wet his pants, another one threw up.” The man shrugged, a look of disgust crossing his face as he thought it all over. At his words, Noaya nodded with a look of understanding.

“No, yeah. I get it. Well, um, congratulations on being here considering…” She trailed off, gesturing around the school and then to him. “If you need anything at all, I’m at the very end of the hall. I'm Naoya Lovel, and I teach fourth grade. I’ll be here to help any way I can, I am known for having everything anyone might ever need, so.” She shrugged and began walking away, pat him, and to her class. The man nodded, a sliver of a smile on his face as his eyes stayed trained on the spot she just left. Catching the camera out of the corner of his eye, she quickly straightened up and then turned the opposite way to face her. “May I ask why you’re carrying a bat?” He asked.

Naoya stopped walking, the bad still in her hand as she angled her body slightly to look back at him. “No, you may not.” She said with a smile before continuing to walk away and into her classroom. Gregory just nodded and walked into his room as well.

“Today was utterly disgusting, but she and Janine seem nice.” He smiled slightly.

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“I got a good feeling about this,” Jacob smirked at Naoya and Janine as they and the rest of the teachers gathered outside at the entrance of the school. It had something to do with Ava needing them to see the improvements she made to the school. “Right? Me too!” Janine said excitedly. Naoya rolled her eyes, stuffing her hands in her pockets due to the cold weather.

“I wish I could live in the blissful ignorance you guys call optimism.” She said, looking between her two friends. They only rolled their eyes at the girl, who was usually a pessimistic person, so they didn’t take her words too seriously.

“Good morning!” Ava said to all the teachers before her, who were obviously in no good mood. “Good Morning!” Janine was the only one to respond.

“Gregory.” Ava finished, giving the man a look. Noaya furrowed her brows slightly, throwing the man a sideways glance.

“The district was so moved by my plea that they approved the emergency budget and sent us the money right away,” Ava said to the group. The crowd started clapping, Jacob and Janine were genuinely happy while most were in shock that the district pulled through.

“Okay, we could have hired aides, we could have got rugs.” Ava continued as the clapping died down. “But then I thought, “No. We need something more immediate.” She said, her words causing Naoya to nod her head as she began slowly making her way away from the group. She knew this wasn’t going to end well, and this was her stopping herself from throwing her loafers at Ava’s head.

“Oh, no, no. The rugs are immediate.” Janie spoke up. “They’re like instant Xanax for kids. I explained it all in my email.” She told the group as she made her way to extract her phone from her purse.

“Girl, who told you to send an email?” Ava asked, looking down the steps at the shorter woman. Jannie stopped what she was doing and glared at Ava. “You did.” She hissed, looking at her confused.

“Anyways, I always feel better when I get my hair done.” Ava continued, not caring for what Janine had to say, as she showed off her new blonde number. “Thus, I do better work, like I’m doing now.” She smiled at them. “You know, fix the outside, the inside takes care of itself.” She then gestured up to the giant tarp over the building, the man pulling it down to show a sign.

It was a giant Willard R. Abbott Elementary sign with Ava on it, leaning onto the letters. The teachers just stood there and looked up at the sign, no words were said between any of them. But they all had the same thought.

What the fuck?

“Yall seeing this?” Ava asked, copying her pose that was on the sign.

“A plastic sign?” Janine asked, looking between the woman and the sign.

“Thank God for the school district, because they gave us $3,000 and I had to spend all of it.” Ava said as if she didn’t care about the severity of the words she just said.

“You spent all of the money on this?!” Janie asked in disbelief.

“Rush job, can you believe this quality?” The terrible principal continued.

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“This is fucking ridiculous, she has gone too far,” Naoya said as she, Jacob, Janine, and Gregory rushed back into the school.

“Somebody needs to do something before I get my bat back out. Actually, Forget the bat, I’m gonna go get a gu—.”

“Okay! Yes.” Jacob cut her off, trying to ignore the scared look Noaya received from Janine and Gregory, while she just continued to sit in her anger, not even seeing them. “Somebody, anybody but you, should do something.” The man said to the angry woman.

“You know what. I’m gonna do something.” Janine said, as stored up and Naoya. Well, maybe not as much but still fired up.

“Okay, alright. Whatever you do, I will co-sign it.” Jacob encouraged. “Yes!” Janine said. “That is how change works. Someone does something and somebody co-signs it.” He finished.

“I want Jannie to succeed in what her plan is because Ava needs to be out in her place, “professionally”, or whatever Jacob said,” Naoya stated, rolling her eyes. “But I also want her to prove something to Barb. For her sake. Because Janine really needs a mother figure in her life and the constant groveling for Barb’s praise is starting to make me want to choke.” She finished with a shrug. “That’s my girl though, I love her.”

“Hey, you two, wait up! I’m going out to lunch too.” Janie called out to Melissa and Bard as they walked down the hall. The camera caught Naoya, who rolled her eyes at the situation she was just talking about making an appearance as she walked after Janine.

“Oh yeah, where are you going for lunch pip-squeak? Bird feeder?” Melissa joked, putting her purse over her shoulder.

“Thought you’d be working on your next miracle from Saint Ava.” Barbra pushed.

“Ha ha, No.” The shorter woman defended herself. “I don’t think I’ll need anything from Ava ever again.” Janine smiled, her words causing the other three women to look confused.

“What does that mean?” Naoya chimed in from behind them, ready to go out for lunch as well.

“Well, I emailed the superintendent and told him everything Ava has done today. No way she doesn’t get fired.” Janie bragged.

“Oh, for the lives of God.” Melissa groaned.

“Janine,” Noaya said in disappointment. “This is why I told you to tell me.”

“What?” She asked, looking between the three women.

“The superintendent never sees our emails,” Barbra told her. “He has them bounced back to the person in charge of where they came from.”

“Wait, I’m sorry.” Janie stared. “Person in charge? That means the emails go back to…” She trailed off, the dots connecting. Just in time for said person to come in the intercom with an announcement.

“Teachers, it’s come to my attention that some of you—one of you—.” Ava clarified, looking through the glass of her office at the group of women standing at the door, her eyes trained on one in particular. “Think it’s okay to go over my head. So, during lunch break—this lunch break—we’ll be having a trait workshop so that we can learn how to become a woke family.” The woman was clearly pissed off, glaring at Janine from where she sat. “It’s gonna be fun!”

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“We are at a crossroads, this is a crisis,” Ava stressed as she stood before the hired group of teachers.

“No, a crisis is eating the cafeteria pizza for lunch.” Naoya chimed in from where she sat in the back.

“Uh, why are we here, exactly?” Gregory asked his seat right in front of hers.

“Well, chocolate drop.” Ava started, causing Naoya to snicker at the name. “I learned that someone here doesn’t respect me. But it’s not about me. Because if you don’t respect me, how can you respect this school?” She continued, causing them all to look at her confused as such a stupid correlation. But, it looks like Ava took that as a look of confusion due to her question.

“You can’t. It’s mathematically impossible.” She finished.

“W-Whoa. Who doesn’t respect you, Ava—I mean, the school?” Jacob asked.

“Me,” Naoya said but seemed to be completely ignored.

“It’s not important. We’re gonna make this a group matter so as too not to single any one person out.” The woman answered him. “Let’s try an excuse where we say whatever we want out loud to each other, no matter how critical. It’ll be fun, let’s start with Janine.” She said, looking over at the short woman who was practically shrinking in on herself.

“Janine?” She asked, smirking evilly.

“Yes?” Janine asked dejectedly, knowing that this whole situation was her fault and knowing that Ava did the exact thing she said she didn’t want to. Single her out.

“You’re pushy, squeaky and annoying,” Ava stated.

Collective disagreement was heated around the room.

“Excuse me?” Melissa piped up.

“Thaya just…” Gregory said.

“When is it my turn?” Naoya asked, starting to take her earring out of her ear.

“No, it’s not bad. No.” Ava defended. “We’re shaking to make us all better. Constructive. Hershey kiss, why don’t you try, start with Janine.” She pushed.

“I don’t want to.” The man sighed.

“You’re right, it should be someone who knows her better. Noaya, Jacob, Barbra?” She asked, looking between the two.

“When is it your turn? I wanna go when it’s your turn.” Naoya stated, folding her arms to keep herself at bay. Gregory glanced back, seeing the look of pure hatred on her face.

“Well, her hair is—“ Jacob started before getting cut off.

“Not!” Noaya and Barba said at the same time, the younger more so talking to her friend next to Janine, who gave the man next to her a look of disbelief.

“Ava, no one’s doing this to anyone.” Melissa started, looking at the woman before her.

“Hold on, I came prepared for this. Sheena, come on in.” Ava said, looking behind her to a student who was sitting behind the library desk.

“Ava, that is my student, she should be at lunch right now,” Janine complained, as everyone in the room looked at the little girl, trying to see what Ava's plan was.

“I am kinda hungry.” The little girl sighed, begrudgingly walking closer to the woman.

“Sheena, remember what we talked about? What was the thing that you wished was different about Ms.Teagues?” Ava asked the little girl. She just stood there, not knowing what to say as the whole room waited on her.

“She got some big feet.” Mr.Johnson chimed in from the very back of the children’s library where he was sweeping.

“Okay.” Janine sighed before standing from her seat. “Everyone, that’s enough. I am the person who disrespected Ava. I emailed the superintendent to tell him that she spent the school's money on a sign.”

“And got her hair done,” Naoya said, Janine, gesturing over to her in agreement.

“I’m sorry, Ava.” She continued. “And I’m sorry everyone missed lunch, especially you, Sheena. But I didn’t it because I care about the kids in this school, and that shouldn’t be a bad thing.” She ranted. “I—Okay. You know what.” She sighed, done talking. She felt as if no one was listening anyway and just wanted to leave. She was on her way out before turning back around. “Sheena, you should have this. I’m sorry.” She said, handing the school pizza over to the girl.

“Uh, no thank you.” The girl said, shaking her head. Janine just sighed again and turned to leave.

Ava chuckled as she watched the girl walk off, shaking her head. “Not a compelling speaker.” She smirked as she shook her head. “Charisma vacuum, am I right?”

Noaya cracked her neck as she stood up. The teachers in front of her filmed a little at the sound and her sudden movements. But she ignored that. “You know what, Ava? I was going to whoop your ass in the parking lot, and as much satisfaction as that would bring me, I don’t want to lose my job. Because I care about these kids. Just like Janine. And she may be a lot of things, like naive, a bit clingy and too cheerful—.”

“Ooh, this is good stuff, let me call her back in here,” Ava smirked as if she didn’t hear the first part of the girls’ speech.

“But she is also right.” Barba cut in, standing up with Naoya. “You know, actually wanting to help the children at this school shouldn’t be a bag thing.” The older woman finished for her. Afterwards, both her and Naoya walked out, letting Ava sit with their words.

They walked out to find the girl in front of her classroom, looking through the window. “Janine, ignore Ava. Big feet are a sign of fertility.” Barbra stated.

“I’m telling you to just give me the signal, I can have her framed for mur—something.” The light skinned girl said, catching herself in front of the cameras.

“Every lunch period, guys.” Was all Janine said before stepping out of their way to show the inside of her class. They both looked in seeing a little boy napping on his jacket, as the library door sounded again. “Every single one, Amir comes and naps in the rug.” She said, informing the whole group as Melissa, Jacob and Gregory joined.

“Mm-hmm. He was in my class.” Barbra said with a fond smile on her face. Mom’s got a lot of kids. Dad’s not around and when she is, the parents fight.”

“Right, so he doesn’t get much sleep. I told him to sleep at his desk, but she says that rug is softer—.” The shirt woman paused, trying to get emotional over the whole situation. “Softer than his bed at home.” There was a moment of silence as all the adults sat with her words. It’s hard hearing about the life of the kids you see everyday, knowing they live lives no one should. And knowing it’s on you to create a better life for them at school.

“You know what? I don’t care I you think I’m good at this or not anymore. I care about whether or not I can make a change.” Janine told Barbra as sternly as she could, which wasn’t a lot.

“Janine.” The woman started. “Teachers at a school like Abbott— we have to be able to do it all. We are admin, we are social workers, we are therapists, we are second parents. Hell, sometimes we’re even first.”

“Mm-hmm.” Melissa agreed.

“Why?” Barbra continued. “It sure ain’t the money.”

“Yup. I can make more working the street, easy.” Melissa chimed in. Causing Jacob and Naoya to look at each other in concern.

“Prostitution?” She mouthed over to the man, who shrugged.

“Look, we do this ‘cause we’re supposed to.” Melissa said to Janine. “It’s a calling. You answered.”

They all looked at eachother fondly, before Jacob started.

“I believe it was Brother Cornel West—“

“No.”

“Don’t.”

“Not right now, white boy.”

They all told him, causing the man to retreat back to his corner.

“You want to know my secret?” Barbra asked, ringing the subject back to where it was. “Do everything you can for your kids.” She smiled. “We’ll help. Hey, I suggest we put our money together and buy Janine the rug.” The older woman encouraged. “What yall think?”

“Absolutely.” Melissa said, pulling out her wallet.

“Guys, you can’t.” Janine started, looking between them. “You don’t have it. I know because I have the same salary as you and I overdrafted on a doughnut hole this morning.”

“Don’t tell me how much money I have.” Noaya stated, holding her hand out as a halt to the girl's words. “I do not claim that broke energy.”

“Well, why are you gonna do?” Barbra asked. “Steal a rug?”

“Not me, but I know a guy who knows a guy?” Janie trailed off, looking between Noaya and Melissa. The light skinned girl raised her hands. “I don’t know a cute guy that can steal that many carpets that fast.” She shrugged, a hopeless look on her face as she glanced at Melissa.

“Way ahead of you.” The woman said as she started typing into her phone. “I’m gonna have to bake a ziti.” She said, holding the phone up to her ear. “Hey, Tony, ya big strung, listen, you still working that stabiuk build?” She said into the device as she walked away from the group.

Sometime later, a guys pulled up in a truck around back with a bunch of rugs for them. They all celebrated, going one by one to grab a rug. “Yay! I finally have one! My room was so depressing.” Naoya said as she waked down the hall with her rug.

“You’re on a mission.” Gregory stated, looking at the shorter girl in between him and Noaya. “It’s cool to see.”

“Thank you. Just a day in the life of being a teacher here. You get used to it.” Janine smiled.

“And that smell in the walls?” He asked, pointing.

“Oh no, you’re never gonna get used to that. Sometimes I wish I had a bad nose like Naoya.” She joked, elbowing the girl next to her. The taller woman lightly groaned. “Janine, you know that’s a big insecurity of mine. I have a fear of smelling bad.” The half Japanese girl tried to clarify to the male. “You’re subbing to go full time right?” She asked, wanting to change the subject.

“Um, we’ll see.” He said as they all briefly stopped in the hallway. “This job definitely surprises me.”

“Well, I hope you stay.” Janine said. “For the kids.” She clarified. Naoya shot a quick glacé to the camera, a small smirk on her face. She then decided to walk away. The camera caught Gregory’s eyes jumping from both women walking away, a small smile on his face. He then looked in the camera and dropped his expression.

“I’ll stick around for a while.” He said. “You know, for the kids.”

“Look guys!” Naoya said as she rolled out her shakes rug for her students. They all celebrated, clapping excitedly at the fact that they had a rug now.

“Ms.Lovel, I hate the egales.” One student said, standing next to the woman.

“Yeah, me too, kid. But don’t tell anyone I said that.” She said, patting the top of their head as Ava walked past her door. She paused at the sight of the rugs. Naoya placed her hands on her hips and cocked her neck, making Ava glare at the woman for a quick second before walking away.

“And that kids, is how you get rid of the enemy without fighting.” She said, pointing around the room to make sure they were watching. “Now that we have a rug, let’s watch that nature documentary!” She said excitedly, causing all the students to yell with excitement well.

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hiramaris · 1 year ago

Text

Kiss It Off Me

CHAPTER 1

Summary:

A story revolving around the newly arrived resident farmer in the eyes of the personified perfection, the sunflower of Pelican Town herself, Haley. Or. When Haley finally met the person that caused ripples in what was once a stagnant town, and she didn’t know how to handle such massive change.

Pairings: Haley x Fem!farmer

Notes:

Haley's heart events are just soooo wifey, especially after marriage. Her character development is well written off but I just can't help but notice that something is missing, like the heart events are just not that connected in some way. Stardew is an absolute gem don't get me wrong. I'd like to try and connect what I think is missing which is the reason this fic is created. P.S. Second try in making fanfiction. I apologize for any future grammatical errors or whatever. English is not my primary language.

Disclaimer: I do not own Stardew Valley or any of the related characters. Stardew Valley is created by and owned by ConcernedApe. This fanfiction is intended for entertainment only. I am not making any profit from this story. All rights of the original Stardew Valley story belong to ConcernedApe.

Warning: None so far? Just Haley being her usual self

Gif from reddit.com

Winter 25

Immobile.

Stagnant.

Bland.

What words could possibly do justice to describe this sleepy town? Pelican Town had its charms sure. It’s peaceful, the air is fresh, and would never choke you on your sleep plus it gives a really nice tan so Haley wouldn’t really complain.

But it was just so... boring. Was that the right term?

The people are meh, nosy, and just as bland but they are good neighbors though don't get her wrong. They look after them— her and Emily when their parents can’t.

Ugh.

Them again. Thinking about them just makes her angry— blood boiling and all that, and well… sad which is infuriating.

How can you just leave your kids just to go follow your own dreams and travel? And then act like you care just by sending some half-hearted letter? Sending a letter now and then was hardly enough to make up for their absence. How low could that be?

Emily doesn’t think so. But what does she know? Her cooking was as bland as the town, and her obsession with crystals and hippie clothes was just plain ridiculous. She knows nothing.

Her sister is anything but pessimistic. She saw the light in everything whereas Haley ever saw them through the lens of her camera.

Capturing a single moment in a photograph was a thousand times more vivid and alive than the bleak and colorless reality she was currently living in.

She should be in college right now, pursuing her dreams, being the center of attention, and having boys falling over themselves to impress her. Or she would have been running her own photography studio by now in a city that never sleeps, schmoozing with some famous photographers and carving a niche for herself in the cut-throat world of photography.

But no, because here she was, stuck in a six-mile drive from the nearest city, life as directionless as the people in here.

Why am I even staying here? She wonders.

Oh, yeah— grandma.

This house is hers. Her house is the only thing that made her feel that Grandma is still here, with them. Even though Haley is talking big about leaving this town, she knew to herself that she doesn’t have the strength to just leave it just like that. Which is why they both tried to keep it tidy and well... avoiding it from falling apart.

Aside from that, there was nothing to do here. The only things keeping her sane were her camera, her phone, and the clothes she ordered online.

Oh, and of course, her best friend, Alex.

He's the only one— aside from Emily and of course, the Mullner residence, Granny and George are good people even though George is grumpy all the time, that she's able to have a decent conversation. She and Alex are, after all, not the sharpest tool in the shed, and shared almost the same brain cell.

He’s that typical jock boy, ripped as hell but in terms of brain, well… meh. Not like Haley's any better so who is she to judge?

They went to the same school, belonged to the same clique, and were both popular, of course. He’s here to practice his grid ball or whatever but Haley knew better.

Alex, despite being the dungus that he is, has a lot on his plate already. He needs the peace this town can offer.

And maybe, maybe I need it, too.

Maybe being away from the city has a good cause, despite her constant complaints, this town has been her home for the past six years after all.

But she just really couldn’t help but dwell on this stupid thought of hers of being stagnant and directionless at this time of the year.

Winter.

Ugh. It’s stupidly cold outside and there’s no way she’s walking in six-inch snow just to get a quality photo, which isn’t much considering the lighting outside does not satisfy her at all. The only, and probably one good thing about winter is peppermint coffee. It's hot, minty, and makes her feel warm while making her mouth worthy of being sucked on— err... that's a want that cannot be sated as of the moment.

The bachelors in this town suck for real. They are not even worthy of a single glance. Apart from Alex, of course, but he's a friend so... no.

And what's made it double suck is that she ran out of peppermint coffee. Pierre is out of stock and there's no way she'll let herself be caught alive inside that creep manager's store that runs Joja or whatever.

Now she's stuck sitting at the table, devouring a massive pink cake that could feed an entire family, enduring a coffee so bland it makes her want to try and drink tea.

She hates tea.

Oh yeah, she's also holding a note and a sunflower in her other hand.

She doesn't want to read the letter but considering the gifts she just received, it’s probably just the same lame-ass apology about being unable to be here on her birthday this coming Spring 14th. Not that it mattered anymore; it had been two years of absence, and she had grown used to it by now.

With a flick of her wrist, she tossed the note onto the table, debating whether to toss it into the fireplace or tear it to shreds or whatever.

If it's just another excuse, she doesn’t want to hear it.

"Haaaay!" And there's a familiar voice.

"If you don't have peppermint coffee with you I swear to Yoba—"

"What's the case, long face?" he quipped. "And no, I don't have anything with me."

She looked up from her cake, finding Alex strolling in their kitchen with one of his shit-eating grins, hair covered with a concerning amount of snow. She grimaced. "Sometimes I wonder why I'm friends with you."

He feigned a hurt expression. "I thought you loved me though."

"According to gossip, maybe but really, I don't," she deadpanned.

He cackled at the mention of that. At the center of the gossip mill passing down from Marnie, Jodi, and Caroline, maybe Robin, too, and probably all the yoga club, is he and Haley dating. Which was absurd, to be honest.

"No, really, Hay." He finally turns serious. "What's up? What's got your face looking like that?"

"It's just the stupid climate." Haley tried to lie. She didn't want to stir up drama at the moment. Alex frowned, catching up with her lie almost immediately. He caught sight of the letter Haley threw earlier. "Alex don't—"

Too late. He already got it. He sat down next to her as he read the contents of the note, his brows furrowing in what she assumes is annoyance. "Parents, huh? Same old, same old?" He raised an eyebrow.

Haley huffed and snatched the letter away. "Yes, the usual."

"Well." Alex propped his elbow on the backrest, a sly grin returning to his face. "I just got the perfect news that might take your mind off things."

Haley arched a perfect eyebrow, curious. Gossip wasn't his usual forte.

"Spill."

"A new farmer is coming to town."

Haley's fork paused in mid-air. "Uh... I'm not sure how to react to that, and what's so great about it?"

His smile widened. "I heard she's from Zuzu City."

"I'm sorry, what?"

"Why? Surprised another Zuzu native is coming here?"

"No, you dungus." She slapped his hand attempting to take a slice of her cake. "I heard you correctly, right? You said the farmer's a she? A girl is taking over that farm?"

"Yes," Alex confirmed, finally snagging a bite of cake. Haley makes a scrunched face in mock disgust. "The farmer's a she. Old man Railey's granddaughter actually. What's the problem though?" he asked in mouthfuls.

Haley stood up to grab another spoon. No way she's getting his imaginary cooties. Alex doesn't seem to mind; it only further encourages him to eat some more.

"Because it’s weird," she said as she sat down. "Farming isn't exactly a girl's job, especially for a city girl like her. I bet you she wouldn't last a month."

"Not all girls are like you, Hay— ow! What's that for?!" He rubbed his ribs where Haley just nudged with her boniest elbow of all time.

"As I was saying before being rudely interrupted." She rolled her eyes. "Farming is all dirt and nasty, smelly clothes. That farm was barely run by old man Railey before he died. What could possibly a city girl like his granddaughter could do with that rundown farm? I bet you it’s already smoldering by now."

"Good point," Alex said as he continued eating. Haley swear to Yoba all this idiot does is eat and relax in here.

He has a diet, right? So does she, and they're like eating a fat block of sugar right now.

Whatever. Pink cake has always been an exemption from all her seasonal dietary plans.

"But I guess we'll have to wait and see; don't you think so?" Alex turned to her after a few moments of silence. "I heard she's around our age. If it's true that farming is as difficult as they say, the least we can do is make her feel welcomed."

Haley barely nods in acknowledgment.

This town is like a pond, where everything that enters stays and everyone already there remains. The city is a raging storm with ocean waves ready to swallow you if you go against the flow. A lot of people there has a sense of direction, one Haley aspires to have, and what Pelican lacks. You can't, at all costs, be still and unmoved and some people just couldn't do that.

And those people who couldn't stand the pressure, come here, like a moth drawn to a flame, seeking the mundanity Pelican Town could offer them. Perhaps they have grown weary of the constant hustle and bustle. Maybe city life has been too much. Maybe modern life has been too much for this farmer.

Who knows?

But one thing Haley doesn't like, and what keeps her unmoved and still, is change. Adapting, and adjusting isn't meant for her. It took years before she could finally settle a lifestyle in this town, and another two years of adjustment when her parents decided it would be a good idea to abandon them and go travel. She knew where to go, where townspeople go just so she could avoid interacting with them, she accustomed herself to their culture, and the perfect spots for taking pictures. She has it all memorized and planned out perfectly.

And this farmer will be an anomaly to her perfectly (not as perfect as she thought) crafted routine. New face, a new attitude, and just an overall new person she might be obligated to talk to for the sake of introduction.

Pelican is a stagnant pond, yet this farmer, this alien to her world, she's not yet even here but she is already starting to cause ripples.

And Haley doesn't know what to think of it.

~~~~~

Notes:

The title was inspired by Cigarettes After Sex' Kiss it off me. Their songs are such *chef's kiss* and whilst I was listening to this song, it kind of, sorta, reminded me of how my farmer sees her wife. Thus kabooOm this fic is born

Edit: Because I'm procrastinating and I made sure to finish off my other story first, I decided now to transfer this story from Ao3 to Tumblr

#stardew valley #stardew farmer #haley x farmer #haley x reader #stardew fanfic #stardew alex #stardew haley #sdv

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asterias-record-shop · 2 years ago

Note

Hello darling! I was hoping you’d write something I’ve had stuck in my head. Ethan Landry being completely in love/obsessed with the reader so much so that it started back in Woodsboro. Maybe Richie told Ethan his plan and he showed Ethan a picture of the friend group and he thought the reader was pretty. Richie told him that she has a boyfriend but he’d take care of it. And maybe the readers boyfriend wasn’t the best so she didn’t really mind him dying so when she meets Ethan and he’s so nice, it’s as if everything happens for a reason. If you decide to write this, that would be amazing! ❤️❤️

—𓆩[mine - sleep token]𓆪—

𓆩[main masterlist]𓆪 𓆩[request/ask me something!]𓆪 𓆩[song that inspired it (mine by sleep token)]𓆪

𓆩♡𓆪 CHARACTER - Ethan Landry x Fem! Reader

𓆩♡𓆪 TYPE - fluff, smut

𓆩♡𓆪 WORD COUNT - 2.8K

𓆩♡𓆪 SUMMARY - Ever since he saw that picture of you, he couldn’t stop fucking thinking about you. He’d find reasons to go where you were after he killed your boyfriend, your favorite coffee shop and bookstore or running into you at the store, he just… can’t get you out of his head, and it all comes together when a young girl trying to sell your school’s newspaper gets your attention.

𓆩♡𓆪 STORY WARNINGS - violence || foul language & cursing || obsessive! Ethan || timeskips sorry || you’re a journalist now || friends to lovers || loss of virginity (both) || unprotected sex || oral || fingering || marking kink || possessive talk || morning after pill talk ||

I have waited…

“S-So… who is she again?”

Richie was so fucking annoyed already. Ethan had been asking question after question about you, especially after he killed your boyfriend. “She’s some kid, dude! Oh my fucking god, you want the picture? Here, take the picture! Her name is Y/N L/N, she goes to the same fucking school those other ones go to, I killed her boyfriend, and now she’s single and ready to mingle!”

He pressed the picture into Ethan’s chest, mumbling in annoyance as he continued walking down the hall. Ethan looks down, his fingers stroking over the picture of your face cropped out of a group picture with Tara and Sam. Richie met you a while ago, while he was still dating Sam, but Ethan hadn’t had the chance - yet.

He quickly went to his room, pulling out his laptop and quickly going to search up your school. It wasn’t surprising you were friends with Sam and Tara, but as soon as he saw you on the main slideshow for the school with the title ‘Our school newspaper’s Editor-In-Chief got a full ride to Blackmore University on a Journalist Scholarship’. How the fuck did you become friends with Sam and Tara while being a journalist?

He clicked on the slideshow, a large picture of you and some other people showing up with links to issues and how to get a subscription and such to the newspaper. What caught his eye though was the Instagram link, quickly clicking it and logging in to actually open it, your face in many of the posts. He clicked on one of the posts, your voice matching you perfectly as you yell out, “Come get our latest issue!”

He inhaled sharply, the tight shirt you were wearing and ripped jeans made a shiver run down his back. He listened to it over and over again, the only thing registering in his mind being come, come, come.

It didn’t take him long to lay back, getting ready to get himself off to the sound of your voice before staring at the caption. ‘Come see us at our monthly fundraiser at the Coffee Bean this Saturday!’

Oh he was definitely going that day, but he was focused on other things right now.

That Saturday, of course he attended. It was pretty full, not overly but enough, and he quickly got a drink before sitting in the corner. He had brought a book he wasn’t going to read, the only reason it was with him was because he was using it to hide his eyes whenever you looked anywhere in his vicinity. You were handing out copies, giggling and smiling with everyone you saw, and by fucks name he couldn’t stop staring at you.

“Hey!” A voice made him jump, looking over at a young girl who offered him a magazine. “You’re in high school, right? My cousin is the chief editor of this thing or whatever, you should read it and buy something!”

“Charlie!” A voice yelled, both of them looking back as you ran over. “That’s rude, you can’t do that!”

“Why not? He’s just sitting there pretending to read a book!” The young girl supposedly named Charlie says, flapping around the magazine as you shake your head.

“Charlie, go drink your frappe!” You take the copy of the magazine as she groans. “Go!”

“Oh! Her boyfriend was just murdered, you should buy it!” Charlie tries to play the guilt card, a smile on her face as you quickly push her away.

“Go!”

“I’m trying to get you sales, Y/N! Oh, hey, do you want a magazine?!” She runs after a bystander making Ethan laugh, a groan falling from your lips in embarrassment.

“Oh my god, I’m so sorry,” you whispered, pressing your face into your hands as he laughed even harder. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Don’t worry about it,” Ethan smiled at you before offering his hand. “I’m Ethan.”

“I’m Y/N,” you giggled, taking his hand and shaking firmly. “It’s nice to meet you.”

“So… your boyfriend was murdered or was it like… a tactic?” He asked with a smile, knowing full well he was dead.

“Oh no, he’s dead,” you say, eyes widening. “Sorry, I should sound more concerned! I’m not, though, he was an asshole. Do you go to Woodsboro-”

“No,” Ethan says quickly, shaking his head. It could’ve been a lie, you certainly wouldn’t have known that. “I just came to support a pretty girl.” He holds up his coffee, smiling at you.

Normally, he wouldn’t have done that not one bit of him would’ve done that because he’s a fucking pussy, but holding your hand made him confident. You paused as he stared at your face, your eyes flickering down at your hands as you smiled. “Oh yeah? That pretty girl here?”

“She’s real close too,” Ethan smiled widely at you, leaning down to maintain eye contact. “Real close.”

“What did you say your name was again?” You look up at him, biting your lip. “Hm?”

His face turned a bright red as he started to pull his hand away before your fingers moved around him. “Ethan. Ethan Landry.”

Your smile grew. “Well then Ethan Landry,” you tilt your head. “Can I get you another one of those drinks?”

Ethan smiled. “Why don’t I get you a drink instead?”

I know you can see… that you will be mine.

You and Ethan both got into Blackmore University, and while he roomed with Chad, you got your own apartment. You both hadn’t started dating just yet, but he was so close, so so close. He wanted to make you his before the murders started, so that he could… comfort you during the murders. Protect you with everything he had, he was so, so close.

“Y/N, can I talk to you?” Ethan whispered, tugging on your hand while the movie played loudly on the screen, the middle of a sex scene making his stomach twist and his dick hard.

“Hm? Oh yeah!” You paused it, smiling over at him as you raised a brow. “What’s up, E?”

He inhaled shakily, shrugging as he pulled you closer to him. You sighed, hugging him tightly as you laid against his chest. “You know I love you, right?”

You nodded, humming as you looked up at him. “I know, Ethan. I swear… you came at the most perfect, perfect time. I don’t know what I would’ve done if I didn’t meet you.”

“Well, we will never have to find out, right?” He smiled down at you, stroking your cheek. “We were made for each other, baby.”

You giggled. “Baby? That’s new.”

Ethan shrugged, leaning down. “You like it?”

You smile, reaching up to stroke his cheek. “I do.”

“Y/N, you… you came into my life at the most perfect time,” he smiled widely, stroking your face as you shifted to lay back. He moved to stay above you, leaning forward to tuck his face into your neck. “I don’t want you to leave… ever. I want to stay by your side forever.”

You gasped as his hands snake around your waist, pulling your body closer to his own as you wrapped your arms around his shoulders. “You promise? Promise to never leave me?”

You had gotten to the point where Ethan was next to you all the time, he was your support system - he couldn’t leave you. He promised you that, your fingers interlocked in a pinky promise whenever he got into Blackmore and followed you here. He couldn’t leave you, you both needed each other.

“I promise, baby, I promise.”

You looked up at him, moving your hands hooking behind the back of his neck as you pulled him down for a firm kiss. “Were you ever going to get to that part, or were you going to keep talking?”

He smiled, leaning down for another kiss. Your lips were soft and tasted like that cherry chapstick you always seemed to lose - even though he always took it from you - and you bought yourself another one the next time you went to a gas station that sold your favorite chapstick.

He always slipped it on whenever you weren’t looking, throwing it away whenever the layer you put your lips on disappeared.

The taste was addicting though, your taste and the cherry flavor he only subjected you to as he pushed his tongue into your mouth, trying to get as much of your taste in his own mouth. You gasped, back arching as his tongue pushed into the back of your throat, swirling around your own tongue and making mixed saliva gather at the back of your throat.

You choked softly making him pull back, lips shiny and swollen as you swallowed with a clearing of your throat. “St-Still need to breathe, honey.”

He laughs, his hands rubbing your sides. “Sorry. Got a little carried away, didn’t I?”

You nodded before sitting up, Ethan quickly followed as you started pulling at your shirt. He gasped when he saw your pretty bralette, black and lacy with chiffon underneath the only thin material covering your tits. “You did, but it’s okay. I want… I want you, but I’ve never done this before. Have you?”

He goes quiet, unable to answer as he stares at your tits and his hands twitching in anticipation to squeeze and grab at them. You giggled, leaning forward to instead cup his face while your other hand pulled at the hem of his plaid button down that you got him for his birthday one year.

It was easy to pull it off him, his body immediately at your mercy as you pushed him onto his back instead, hovering over his cock before sitting down on him. He groaned loudly, his cock pressing against his pelvis as you leaned forward, rolling your hips into his as his hands held your waist and pulled you closer. He groaned as you leaned down, kissing his lips softly. “Think that’s a no, right?”

He shook his head quickly, staring up at you. “N-No, I’ve never done this before.”

“Sex or seeing a woman naked?”

“I-I… does porn count?” He asked mindlessly, as though it wasn’t the stupidest question in the world, but you laughed as you leaned down with a firm kiss.

“Sure, baby, if you want it to.” You responded, bringing his hands up to your bra as you fixed yourself. “Do you want to take it off?”

He nodded immediately, smiling as you fixed your arms so his hands could slip behind your back and quickly unclasp your bra with a quick flex of his fingers. You giggled as it quickly slipped off, his hands going around the band to finish tugging it off of your body, sitting up to suck at your skin. You gasped as his mouth sucked against your skin, hot and slippery as his tongue dragged over before sucking and digging his teeth into your skin. You gasped as his hands pushed between the both of you, squeezing and cupping your tits as you pressed kisses to his head.

“This something you’ve seen in those pornos, baby? Hm? Playboy magazines?”

He shook his head, grabbing your hips and laying you back against the couch as he stared at your now hickey littered form. “No, honey. This is what I’ve thought about every night for the last year. Thinking about making you mine over and over again.”

You gasped as his hands tugged at your bottoms, slipping into the band of your underwear and pulling them down as you lifted your hips for him to take them off. He stared at the string of arousal that came from your cunt to your underwear, the floral cloth pattern being thrown to the side as he ducked down to press kisses against your thighs.

You gasped as his teeth grazed your skin, his tongue flattening against your cunt making you whine loudly. “Y-You’ve never done this before, right?”

He shakes his head. “No, but I’ll learn. You tell me what feels good.”

You inhaled deeply, nodding as he ran his fingers down your slit, experimenting. He leaned forward, licking down your cunt and letting his nose tap against the hood of your slit and his tongue curl around your clit and his finger push against your entrance. He hummed, watching as your entrance greedily opened up for him, sucking his fingers into you and clamping down almost immediately.

A gasp fell from your lips as he pushed it in knuckle deep, your walls clamping down on him as your thighs spread wider, your hands pushing down as you held the back of his head. He thrusted his finger in and out of you, twisting to push another finger in and curl them to push into that perfect spot. Your eyes rolled back, mouth falling open as he sucked on your clit, teeth nibbling on the bud before your nails dig into his scalp.

He could feel your walls clamping down on him, the sensitive ring of nerves tightening around the base of his knuckles, his eyes watching as spit gathered against the sensitive bud before spitting against your clit. It must’ve pushed you over the edge, a loud scream leaving your lips as your cunt convulsed around his fingers and your fingers tugged on his hair, thighs shaking as he pulled away from your clit to watch the spit fall down your cunt.

He stared as your pretty cunt convulsed when he pulled his fingers out, a whine leaving your lips as you buck your hips, your entrance fluttering as he sat back. He stared at you, your hazy eyes and your hickey littered form, everything that made you feel good was from him - everything was from him.

“Ethan, do we need a condom?” You whisper, staring up at him as he starts taking off his pants.

“Do you want me to get us one? It’ll take time baby, can you wait that long?” He knew you couldn’t wait that long, there was no way you could wait that long.

“P-Promise you’ll get me a pill?” You whisper, making him nod, smiling down at you as he pressed a firm kiss to your lips.

“I promise, baby.”

You gasped as his tip teased your entrance, whimpering as your arms wrapped around his neck and pulled him closer to you. “Fuck baby, it hurts. It hurts, it hurts!”

“Did I not stretch you out enough? Do you want me to stop, I can find lube? You have lube, right?” He was asking because he knew damn well that you had vibrators, so you had to have lube too.

“Y-Yeah, bottom drawer in my room, dresser.”

He couldn’t have run faster to your room, quickly digging into your drawer and grabbing the pink tube before running back out. Your fingers were pushed into your cunt, scissoring and thrusting inside of yourself with both hands as you whimpered. “Fucking hell, you never said you were thick and long.”

He laughed as you threw a leg over the couch, sitting in front of you before spitting into his hand and rubbing it up and down his shaft. “Still want the lube?”

“J-Just a bit,” you whisper, staring up at him. “Not too much.”

He quickly opens the lid, squirting some into his hand and the smell of cherries fill his nose. He laughed, smiling. “You’re just a cherry girl, aren’t you?”

You giggle, nodding. “Yeah.”

He spreads it onto his cock, keeping some on his fingers to push it into you. You gasped, whining as he pushed them in a few more times before pulling them out and pushing his tip to your cunt. Your eyes rolled back before snapping his hips forward, wiping them against your clothes on the floor before holding your thighs around his waist.

“Fuck baby, you’re so tight. So fucking tight, you’re perfect for me baby, so perfect. Like you were made for me, remember when you said that? Did you not say we were made for each other?”

You laughed, nodding. “Yes! Yes, I was made for you… and you were made for me. All for me.”

Regular taglist: 𓆩[@lem0ns77]𓆪 𓆩[@cecepop15]𓆪 𓆩[@memeorydotcom]𓆪 𓆩[@your-favorite-god]𓆪 𓆩[@xyzstar]𓆪 𓆩[@just-my-shit]𓆪 𓆩[@your-mom21]𓆪 𓆩[@c78r]𓆪 𓆩[@dizscreams]𓆪 𓆩[@asrt5]𓆪 𓆩[@wenvierismycomfort]𓆪

#asterias-record-shop #requests open #ethan landry x reader #ethan landry #ethan landry smut #ethan landry x fem!reader #ethan landry x you #ethan landry x y/n #scream #scream fanfic #scream six #scream vi #scream movies #ethan landry scream #with love asteria ♡

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kamiversee · 9 months ago

Text

The F*ck List (semi-official) Breakdown.

The following was submitted by my lovely ☃️anon, & I needed to make this it’s own post given how long it is, my replies & clarifications are written in between this breakdown & theory (Ex: A/N > Etc.).

Here, you’ll find majority of details you may have missed & maybe even more to think about. Enjoy :)

(wc; 5.7k) (content; spoilers ofc)

holy shit Kami. i literally had to take the entire day to process everything. before anything else, i need you to know that you've created an absolute masterpiece. TFL was the first fic i ever cared to keep up with and it has set the bar impossibly high for any other writer out there. please take your time with TFL 2, i'm so excited to read your other work!! also a break sounds like it would be so good for your mind considering how long you've dedicated yourself to this story 😭😭😭 you're seriously impressive. heads up, i didn't proofread this at all bc i finished typing this at 4 am LMFAO so forgive me if it's all scrambled and makes no sense.

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A/N > Thank you for taking the time to write this breakdown, I seriously appreciate it so I wanted to take my time in responding to it & engaging with you :)

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now, on to the yap. i deadass cracked my knuckles before typing all this out.

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A/N > You’re so real for tht ngl

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i reread the entirety of TFL from chapter 1 and my brain is so melted from analyzing that i'll prob find more details tomorrow after i sleep on some theories 😭 BUT HOLY FUCK YOU REALLY WEREN'T KIDDING WHEN YOU SAID YOU WERE HINTING AT GOJO'S OBSESSION SINCE LITERALLY THE FIRST CHAPTER??? the fucking hint being that "Gojo's desire for you is so strong it's almost frightening." GIRLLLLLL 🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵🫵

your foreshadowing and referencing is insane. idk if you intended a lot of it, but a lot of it caught my eye.

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A/N> I TOLD YOU GUYS IVE BEEN DOIN IT SINCE THE FIRST CHAPTER !! Okay not exactly but like there was a vibe I had from the first chapter & when I later came up with the twist & went back and saw that everything would connect perfectly ^.^

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chapter 7; the reader and Gojo have lighthearted banter about how the reader "started this" situation.

"I made a mistake." [reader]

"A good one."

"Bad one." You correct.

this was regarding a completely different situation but it baffled me how much it connects to the plot itself; the reader making the "mistake" of leaving her door open, and how it lead to months full of trauma and love. probably completely unintentional, but such a good detail.

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A/N > Very intentional btw, it’s supposed to be known that, in a sense, Gojo x reader is forbidden :)

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Choso's still staring at you intently, "What version of you would someone not like?"

The way he words his question only furthers that little feeling in your chest. It's almost as though he were implying that any and all versions of you would be acceptable in his eyes. - Chapter 16

THE WAY WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THAT CHOSO WOULD STICK BY US REGARDLESSSSSSSS AAAAAA WE'RE SO BLIND!!! i just hope this stays true to the sequel :')

"No, I wish you didn't have to hate me." He says, shutting his eyes again and sucking in a deep breath, "B-But... it's uh, It's okay. I can live with you hating me." - Chapter 21

AAAA WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN!!!! WE SHOULD HAVE KNOWN THIS WAS FORESHADOWING OUR FUTURE WITHOUT GOJO 😭😭😭 how he can live with the idea of the reader hating him so long as she's happy with Choso, especially considering his later revelations of how twisted his actions were and how if you stuck with him, he'd view you differently. fuck.

You despise the fact that he loves you. To you, it's almost entitled for him to feel like he has that right. How dare he hold such a strong emotion for you? If he felt this way, why is he forcing you to sleep with people for him? It makes no sense.

Why would someone claim to love you and put you through so much?

If he's been in love with you all this time, why start the list in the first place? Why couldn't he have just tried to win your heart from the beginning? Why the list? Why the blackmail? You don't understand him. - Chapter 23

i'm crushed. we didn't understand because we didn't know that Sukuna was involved. that could mean a million other things. i have some far-fetched theories about this but hear me out later!!!

the entirety of chapter 23 had me fucking floored while i was rereading. THE FORESHADOWING WAS EVERYWHERE!!! EVERY FUCKING WHERE

"No sweetheart, Sukuna's an asshole but..." His expression flickers and his smile fades away. He swallows and then clears his throat, "I'm pretty sure he'll satisfy you just fine."

...

You narrow your eyes at him, "Are you sure?"

...

"Fuckin' positive," Gojo suddenly sounds pissed and you grow concerned. The arm around you gets a little tighter while he walks you through some crowds and you keep looking at the man confused.

There's a vein popping out along his jawline because of how hard he's gritting his teeth.

of course he's aggravated because he knows that Sukuna is the one behind the list in the first place 😭😭😭 I'M SORRY WE DOUBTED YOU SATORU, FUCKKKK

——FIFTEEN MINUTES. That was the exact amount of time it took you to seduce Sukuna. The act was way too easy. Actually, it was suspiciously easy.

BECAUSE HE FUCKING KNEW 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

"What all did you plan on doing tonight aside from getting harassed by strangers?" Sukuna suddenly questions against your skin.

You ignore how close he is and the way his lips make you tense, turning your head to face forward. Chuckling at his last comment, "Same thing as everyone else here." You reply, slightly confused by his question.

"Bullshit," He utters, "Nobody dresses like this without the intent of gaining my attention," Sukuna claims while his hands slide back down along your body.

this 100% could be just him being cocky and Sukuna, but the recent reveal just makes this feel like an extra demeaning interaction. but of course, it's Sukuna.

chapter 24 is so fucking shady too with everything we know. i know you addressed some of these points already bc i brought them up in previous anon messages, but these things still had me paranoid;

the way Sukuna leaves us and tells the reader to go to his room after a certain amount of time (i know he could have just been tidying up real quick but everything about this man has me on edge)

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A/N> A lot of people are on edge about this but I’ll be honest, there’s nothing crazy that happens in between this time period. Not saying nothing happens but nothing crazy— it’ll be addressed later (in the next fic most likely)

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the way he's been consistently on the phone since the reader entered the room, which is shortly after she messaged Gojo saying that she'll be able to cross Sukuna off of this list by tonight which he wasn't happy with at all.

no seriously, he kept diverting his attention to something in the bathroom and then came out, still on his phone. maybe he's talking to literally anyone else but STILL I'M PARANOID

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A/N> This is to show the fact that Sukuna is a very socially active individual, & hints to the theory (I think you later state) that he has connections.

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this happens in chapter 25 but the way he keeps smiling while the reader kisses him is just so smug of him especially considering the original reason as to why the reader's even interacting with him

then the spicy chapters with Sukuna…

the foreshadowing that the lack of knowledge of Sukuna's reputation will come back to bite her in the ass; first with the knowledge that he is abusive, and then her finding out that he is the curator of the list, knowing the full details of her blackmail and even threatening her again.

WHO DID HE FUCKING FIGHT HELPPPPP MY MIND IS BOGGLING there's no way it's Gojo, right? they're both too unscathed in these next few chapters for there to have been a fight between the two of them.

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A/N > It’s not Gojo. 🙏

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THE FUCKING MOMENT WHERE HE CONTEMPLATED SOMETHING WITH THE PHONE IN HIS HAND??? I FUCKING KNEW IT. I FUCKING CALLED IT WAS SOMETHING SHADY AS HELL.

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A/N> The other Sukuna hint I was talking about is right before this moment btw, you’re welcome ;)

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then he has the audacity to hold his tongue right afterwards?? it's such a big hint towards the fact that he knew about the list from the beginning UGHHHHHHHH.

the way he tried to humor the reader about her "job" even though he was in on the whole thing. UGH. SUKUNA WHEN I GET YOU SUKUNA?? 👊👊👊👊 especially with that "whore" joke right afterwards. i can't stand him. i know that it's implied that he has a twisted view on women from having abusive women in his life (his mom and his ex who he punched) BUT STILL. he's so lucky he's fictional and hot.

the fact that we're able to pick up on the fact that it's a "crazy coincidence" that he continues the whore jokes UGHHHHH HE HAS BEEN PLAYING US FROM THE STAAAAAARTT

Gojo got upset at something from Sukuna's party, he didn't want you to call yourself a whore all of a sudden, Sukuna seems to have believed that was your actual job, and you remember how pissed Gojo seemed as he thought about you sleeping with Sukuna-

Holy fuck. Are the two connected somehow? Is something going on? What does Gojo owe Sukuna? Does Sukuna know you only slept with him as payment to clear Gojo's debt? Is-

GIRL YOU WERE ALMOST THERE!!!! YOU ALMOST HAD IT!!!

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A/N > I love teasing in my narration by nearly spoiling things 😹

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---

seriously though, these chapters killed me. the official end obliterated my heart. it's so fucking bittersweet i want to scream at the top of a high building. the reader ends up happy and with someone she loves, which is fantastic for her. she deserves that after everything she went through. Choso treats her so, so well.

but Gojo. with the theories i have, i feel horrible. i was so harsh towards him as a die hard Choso girly but these endings changed me. i just hope i'm right.

the fact that his healing journey is harsher than ours makes this ending sting so much. he's healed, and you can see it with his demeanor from the call and the way he interacted with the reader.

we were always made aware of the way he looked at us such deep attachment. the initial gleam shows that he's happy to see us, but that he's not reliant on us for his happiness anymore. he's finding that on his own, and it's a grueling process for him. i wished the reader gave him a hug, but that would probably make me feel even worse.

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A/N> He gave her a lil side hug (with his arm over her shoulder) & was resting his head on hers at the end if that makes you feel any better 😅

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"Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start." i'm gonna throw up bro i'm so sad. i'm proud of his growth. his obsession was so, so strong but he always prioritized the reader's happiness over himself. i know that being self-sacrificial is so core to his personality but it doesn't make it suck any less. i'm devastated. i started blasting mitski in the car on my way to work after reading this.

i thought i was ready for the journal burning. i was so ready for this tie to be severed, for them to finally move on. but i failed to realize that it could ultimately mean a life without each other. it makes sense as to why, but it still sucks.

kami i need that poly ending before i cry my eyes out at 4 am rn. you know i can't handle angst, but bittersweet endings lowkey hurt me even more. i need all my babies to be happy. i desperately need it.

but that alt ending... fuck. in a horrible, sick, and twisted way, i'm relieved. i'm a Choso girly from the bottom of my heart but i can't let this Gojo go omfg. even if he shows up for one more chapter, i think i'll be alright. BUT IT BETTER NOT BE FOR DEATH KAMI!!!! I HAVE A FEW EXCERPTS THAT SUGGEST DEATH FLAGS BUT I AM SIMPLY NOT LOOKING AT THEM. DON'T DO THIS TO ME KAMIIIIIII. i need this boy to be frolicking in a field of flowers or something. my heart can't take this.

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A/N> I know I reference death a lot but that’s just to add a sense of how dramatic the characters are 🫶

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---

okay, time for my mind-fucky theory. pls bare with me. if it wasn't obvious by my last post, i'm 100% on board with the theory that Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo, which started this whole thing. but the thing that is getting me is how this all connects. i have some assumptions that could make sense, but there are a handful of gaps. here's my thought process;

Sukuna's blackmailing Gojo by using his obsession/love against him.

we are already familiar with the fact that Gojo has liked the reader for years. there was a chapter where Gojo mentioned that it started off as a "crush" but he was so oblivious to his own obsession up until the reader mentioned it to him. it's to the point that he didn't understand what was wrong with the idea of hurting people for the reader. who's to say that Sukuna didn't catch him in some sort of heinous act regarding the reader like stalking?

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A/N > You’re cooking with this one and I almost, almost had to go get the fire extinguisher :D

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Gojo didn't understand the difference between love and obsession until later on in the story. this would be consistent with the implication that Gojo just loved her so deeply that his morals were askew as we have yet to find out how far his love goes.

what if Sukuna caught him in the act of doing god knows what, and brought up the fact that if the reader found out about this, that she'd get super freaked out and would do everything she can to get away from him (considering probably barely knew each other, if at all, at this point). but why would Sukuna devise such a plan over a money bribe? well, Sukuna's already revealed to be wealthy, and maybe he was bored. the same line that Gojo kept repeating to the reader whenever she questioned him as to why he did it. what if Gojo asked Sukuna why he's blackmailing him, and he said the exact same thing; "I was bored." we see how much Sukuna mirrors Gojo's speech by calling the reader "sweetheart" often, what if Gojo did the same thing?

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A/N > Gojo & Sukuna do have a few parallels in this story & they will be addressed more in the sequel.

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we wondered in chapter 23 how Gojo reaches out to these men to ensure their debt is "paid," but considering how oblivious everyone else on the list is to Gojo owing them anything, it would make sense that he only reports to Sukuna as he is ordered to do so. but two things stumped me on this theory overall.

the reader said that she used to party a lot and get involved with boys before Gojo. if he was stalking her for so long, why did he wait so long to approach her?

what specifically would be the blackmail that Sukuna has on Gojo?

regarding the first point, it's been mentioned that Gojo has been "scared of women" and was shy when it came to approaching the reader. he knew of her for so long, but was able to constantly slip under her radar. considering how much of a pervert he is, it wouldn't have been surprising for him to sneak around and watch in on the reader hooking up with other guys. after all, these guys were probably complete strangers to him and all he cared about was you. remember how Gojo was basically able to tune out his own best friend, Suguru, when the reader was hooking up with him in their living room? it wouldn't be wild to assume that he was able to do the same for your other hookups as he spied on you.

to connect this with second point, what if Sukuna caught Gojo being a peeping tom on the reader during a party hook-up? while being so distracted in the act of spying, Sukuna spots him. the reader wouldn't be alright with the fact that someone who's barely an acquaintance (if that, depending on the time this occurred) to her has been perving around and watching her have sex without her consent. she would do anything to get away from Gojo, and of course that would crush him. Gojo tried to buy Sukuna's silence by any means necessary. so, Sukuna generated a list of people that he and Gojo mutually knew for the reader to fuck. the reasoning for it would be the fact that Gojo has to sit through the process of having the girl he likes fuck a bunch of guys besides him, and the fact that Gojo knew all these men would make it sting more. plus, he has a reputation for hookups. (chapter 8)

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A/N > You’re like RIGHT there with it and yet not there at the same time omg 😟

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but why would Gojo agree to this deal with Sukuna, and why would he also go with the method of blackmailing the reader? it's basically a guarantee that the reader would be scared away regardless. but again, we could recall that Shoko mentioned that he was too "scared of women" to approach the reader at first. this was his chance to finally approach her. plus, "once that video is gone, there is no excuse he'll have to be around you." (chapter 8)

---

but the more i thought of this reasoning for the two points, the more bizarre it felt. so what if instead of Gojo being a peeping tom, it was Sukuna. we get so many hints that Sukuna has eyes and intel everywhere. we get an indirect implication of this when he called us out for rolling our eyes during our phone call with him. yes, it could be completely by chance, but it's still a great hint that he "sees everything" and "knows everything." we get an even bigger hint towards this in the alt ending when he directly references The F*ck List.

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A/N > Others have taken note of how Sukuna knew she rolled her eyes but trust me, that’s just to show that Sukuna knows the reader’s body language more than he’s let on & paid attention to her a lot during the time they were together.

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it wouldn't be too far fetched to assume that he has some shady videos taken of people without his consent, some possibly acquired through other people (like how Gojo was revealed to have sent Sukuna the video of the reader from the first chapter). what if Gojo caught Sukuna with the video, threatened him to delete it, and Sukuna counterthreatened to have it be sent and posted everywhere. it would be highly ironic, but consistent with the way that Gojo and Sukuna practically mirror each other at times. the reasoning for the list choices would still be the same for this theory, too.

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my citations for these theories ☝️🤓

“You once asked me if I love you because I blackmailed you or if I blackmailed you because I love you and my answer is both,” Gojo confesses as he turns to meet your gaze, “Through my blackmailing, I fell for you but I also did it because I loved you from the start.” - Chapter 56

loved you from the start; his obsession has been consistent from the start (supports Gojo being a peeping tom theory) or he has always had a deep concern for you (supports him wanting to stop Sukuna from spreading blackmail of you instead).

“I’ve sacrificed everything for you, y’know.”

“How? What’s everything that you’ve sacrificed, hm?”

“You. I sacrificed the woman I love to make her happy.” Gojo admits, and of all he’s said thus far, that feels like the truest statement.

“I could’ve been happy with you.” You remind him.

He laughs, “Yeah well, I’m an idiot.”

You scoff, “That’s all you have to say?”

“Yup.” - Chapter 56

is he an idiot for being a peeping pervert instead of just approaching you normally? maybe. how does this make her happy? she ends up finding love through Choso, through the list, through the blackmail.

But deleting the video means ... he has no more leverage over you and can't force you to help him with the hole he's dug for himself. - Chapter 8

the hole being the blackmail set against him by Sukuna.

Gojo's behind you cursing at himself for being unable to tell you the truth.

He's so scared that you'll never help him without the blackmail and, well, he has every right to be because you're pretty sure that if it weren't for those videos he has over your head, you wouldn't be doing any of this. - Chapter 9

the videos he's referencing is the original video from chapter 1 and the fake video he lied about with Suguru, but he can't tell the reader the truth because it's too twisted and risky (supports Gojo peeping tom theory).

He silences himself in thought. There are so many ways he could go about answering such a question but the possibilities of how you may react are endless. Plus, you're drunk and if he's going to admit or explain anything to you, it'll be while you're sober.

"Because..." Gojo's voice gets so quiet that you almost don't catch what he says, "...I don't have any other choice." - Chapter 21

if he didn't go through with his list, Sukuna would have went through with Gojo's blackmail, thus resulting in either you getting as far away from Gojo as soon as possible or Sukuna's video being sent around.

He let something slip abruptly, "W-Wish I c-could tell you everything, sweets..."

Your brows furrow at that.

Are you missing something here? - Chapter 22

YES GIRL!!!! SUKUNA'S BEHIND THE WHOLE LIST, HE'S BEHIND THE BLACKMAIL GIRLYPOP

"Anything," Gojo says, meeting your gaze. He's so serious that it's almost dark the way he looks at you, "I'd do anything for you." - Chapter 29

"I meant it when I said I'd do anything for you."

You follow his motions and then end up right back in his arms, "Right..."

"I'd sacrifice the very thing I love just to see you happy." Gojo claims proudly.

You scoff, "Thought' I was the thing you loved?"

"You are."

His words bewilder you, "Then that makes no sense."

"It won't." Gojo shrugs. - Chapter 29

🧍‍♀️

anything. even if it means putting your body, heart, mind, and career on the line. directly supports the theory that Sukuna initially had blackmail on the reader.

"We're the same, y'know..." He suddenly says, his voice breaking again, "We both want someone so terribly bad but our situations prohibit us from getting that person."

"You could've prevented all this though..."

Gojo sniffles and you feel a drop of wetness slide down his cheek and slip against your palm. The man was crying? Why? - Chapter 30

this whole time we've been told that Gojo and the reader share more similarities than the reader realizes. what Gojo is to the reader, the reader is to Choso. while Choso now knows of the men that the reader slept with, he doesn't know why. he doesn't know about you being blackmailed. you know that you had to sleep with these men. you don't know why. you didn't know it was because of Gojo being blackmailed.

"For loving me, Satoru. It's not a crime," You say, mocking a comment he made to you earlier, "You're allowed to love me. So, for that, and that only, I forgive you."

Those words healed so many more wounds in his heart than you realized. It was like that was all he ever needed to hear. If Gojo's mistake was loving you and that's what caused this, then you forgive him.

If in some twisted way, his feelings started the list, you forgive him.

COME ON NOW.

There’s so much going unspoken but the two of you knew what either was saying, you understood each other more than either of you realized. - Chapter 35

“Well,” Gojo sighs heavily and then draws your hands off his face, leaning down to you a bit, “Sometimes, sacrifices need to be made in exchange for one’s happiness.”

“Are you telling me that all this was for the greater good?” You quiz as you raise a curious brow.

“Something like that, yeah,” He shrugs. - Chapter 45

You tell him, “If I had one wish, it’d be that you did that from the beginning.”

Gojo opens his mouth to say something but then he swallows his words down. He nearly fucked up.

“All you had to do was talk to me,” Your shoulders raise into a shrug as you move a hand to the doorknob, “Things could’ve been different if you did.”

“Even if I’ve been obsessed with you since the beginning?” He questions and he’s stepping closer to you again. He can’t possibly wrap his head around that possibility-

You laugh a bit, “Especially if you were obsessed from the beginning,” You didn’t know it but that statement right there made the man feel as though his world was falling apart, loads of regret tumbling over him as he stares at you with wide eyes, “Satoru I think you forgot but, before all this started, aside from Shoko… I was lonely.”

Gojo’s throat goes dry and he fails to form a response to that, “I…”

“If you had just talked to me one time, and more than a hey or how are you,” The way your eyes soften, a slim sheer gloss of tears coating your gaze as you speak to him, “I would’ve fallen for you.”

He grits his teeth, “Don’t tell me that.”

“But it’s true.” You say.

And just like that, Gojo was crumbling all over again. If only you knew how much he regretted everything after hearing you say that. - Chapter 46

if he had just spoke to the reader before all of this, maybe she wouldn't have gone to those parties, hooked up with those people, and caused whatever kind of blackmail Sukuna had on Gojo (or on her).

He wishes he could take it all back, his feelings for you included. If only he could go back and stop himself from ever being curious about you. That’s what started it after all. Because, at the end of the day, Gojo knew who you were before you knew who he was— hell, even before Shoko knew who you were. - Chapter 53

then what is the timeline of his obsession starting? has it been before Gojo? could his blackmail have taken place even before Shoko introduced you two, adding to the weight of the threat that Sukuna held over Gojo's head (regarding the peeping tom theory).

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A/N > The timeline on Gojo’s interest, not obsession just yet, on the reader will be addressed in the sequel so this’ll be answered there <3

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---

but there were certain parts that stumped me and my theories so i have some weird reasonings around them;

It's selfish of him and seriously fucked up but, he's said it before and he'll say it over and over again-- you're all he has. He made promises to everyone on that list, promises of delivering a woman to them at some point, and of course, he couldn't convince anyone he knew to do such a thing.

So again, the situation with you just happened to be a coincidence.

The problem is that Gojo hates that it's you. He hates that you're the one he ended up doing this to. - Chapter 8

Gojo's known to be a silly guy so it could make sense that he actually did promise these guys hookups for reasons unrelated to his blackmail. after all, he does have a reputation for getting people hookups. the coincidence is that Sukuna now has dirt on Gojo and wants to toy with him. by making the reader sleep with them the guys he coincidentally owes hookups to, he fulfills his role/reputation and relieves his debt at the same time. two birds, one stone.

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A/N > As we later learn that some of the “debt” Satoru claimed to have isn’t real, we can also infer that his reputation & the promises he’s made to these men were done out of coincidence. Take Toji for example; tell me you can’t see an interaction between him & Gojo where Gojo gets a bad grade and wants to get it up so he taunts his professor with the idea of getting him a hookup & Toji would laugh it off considering Gojo’s reputation ;)

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another thing that stumped me is why Gojo got so worked up with the reader referring herself as a whore, and the connection to Sukuna. my delulu reasoning is that once Sukuna threatened Gojo with blackmail by either of the two theories/methods i mentioned, Sukuna casually referred to the reader as a whore. that caused a major fight between the two, possibly even getting physical (which can refer back to the implication that Gojo has hurt people for the reader).

the fight could have increased the tension and severity of the situation, so Sukuna decides to add Choso to the list knowing how easily attached Choso gets. in chapter 5, the reader and Gojo were discussing the list and Choso specifically. Gojo was even noted to be relieved when the reader had mentioned that they'll just have to hope that Choso doesn't get attached, as he obviously holds deep feelings for the reader. Sukuna knows that by going through with the blackmail with Choso involved, Gojo most likely will not end up with the reader if Choso get attached and the reader reciprocates those feelings.

also, the counterargument that Sukuna and Gojo are actually friends/allies in this situation just doesn't sit well with me. it would make for a crazy twist but it just feels too out of character for Gojo. but then again, how would Sukuna specifically know about The F*ck List? but idk, it just feels so wrong to me. maybe i have too much faith in Gojo lmfao. after all, he has consistently shown a great dislike towards the guy since chapter 23. but maybe it's my denial speaking. i really don't want to think of Satoru going through this whole arc only for it to reveal that he truly is a piece of shit. pls don't do this to my pookie my heart cannot handle it </3

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A/N > Remember, Gojo is a good actor & you go a long period of time in the book not realizing he’s not as much of a villain as he pretends to be 😉

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there's that moment after the reader fucked Sukuna that still messes with my brain. with my theories, my brain's thinking that he contemplated on collecting even more blackmail on the reader. for what reason? idk, to be an ass? to torment Gojo further and add more to his blackmail? but maybe he decided not to because he already has plenty of blackmail on the reader (if the theory of Sukuna having a video of her from way back then is true) and fucking her knowingly made Gojo pissed considering all the dirt Sukuna has.

so why can't Gojo tell her the truth now? why does he want to wait years in advance? maybe he's hoping that by that time, not only will you forget and not care about the situation overall, but maybe Sukuna will forget all about it as well. the chances of Sukuna holding on to the reader's blackmail for that long is slim and the reader would most likely be in a situation where she is completely separated from Sukuna depending on her job and living situation with Choso. the stakes are lower than if he were to reveal everything to you now, at a moment where your life is still so uncertain. it would go against his wish for you to end up happy.

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A/N > Maybe Gojo doesn’t tell her the truth because he can’t, just as he said 🌚 Perhaps he’s not allowed to yet. After all, why would Sukuna even tell the reader he made the list in the end? ^.^ Just some food for thought!

┗━━━

---

regarding the future of TFL... fuck, bro. i have no fucking idea. i'm too caught up in the (presumed) past. i'm mourning fr. i love this fic sooooo fucking much. whenever you decide to pick up on the sequel, i will be there. if you choose to publish anything else in the meantime, i will be there. thanks for such a fun and memorable read, Kami. i'm excited to bookbind this soon 🤍🤍🤍 now, i need to watch blue lock to shove these feelings down.

yap fin (for now)

-☃️

A/N > I love you sosoosooooo much for this. These theories are like reading an entirely new fanfic sometimes except, I know all the answers & what’s going to happen next, which only makes me more excited ^.^ Thank you for taking the time to make this, thank you for reading, thank you for supporting, just, THANK YOU.

This right here is exactly what I write for; people like you :)

To the others reading this breakdown & theory, thank ☃️anon because she’s a damn godsend & ilhsm ^.^ (definitely showing favoritism rn, sorry not sorry, ily all I swear)

Edit; Since you’re watching Blue Lock, I can’t wait to bring my Shidou fanfic here because a lot of the drama in TFL has inspo from that fic, which I wrote first ^.^ & I could totally see you enjoying it because not only is it a childhood friends to lovers than enemies & back to lovers troupe BUT it also includes Itoshi Sae x reader which ofc, adds hella drama :))

P.S. It’s two am as I finally post this and omg sorry it took me a while, I wanted to answer other anons first before unpacking this badboy, again, tysm!!

#the f*ck list #tfl!theories #tfl spoiler #tfl #k!ans: ☃️

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macabremadness · 4 months ago

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fiddleford mcgucket is so AUUUUGHFHSHSGFJ like he is crazy he is a silly goose. just a guy from tennessee who knows how to build literally anything and wanted to make tech to improve peoples lives first like mf built the first portable laptop and cell phone and got NO credit. he wanted to make robot legs cuz he didn't wanna walk but imagine if he was able to actually make some as mobility aid anyways i think about that a lot

that one time ford suggested to gather the cute little living minerals to help them lead them out the cave tunnels while fiddleford instead just picked them up and banged them together to relight the lantern and they all just scattered and one bit ford. he's so smart <3

weird cows producing weird milk that might be dangerous for human consumption? fidds fuckin drank that shit straight out the bucket. and i think he took it with him the rest of the way cuz he dramatically spit it out upon seeing cso

hes like a chihuahua to me he just stands there and pathetically shakes but then he also gets really feisty and bites. he canonically growls as an old man

how many gifts has fiddleford given ford at this point? like hes given him an axolotl, handmade gloves, a handmade snow globe, a custom laptop, squash with a human face, essentially his life. "hey what is the universe was a hologram" had the trajectory of his life changed forever. LIKE BEFORE BACKUPSMORE HE NEVER EVEN DRANK COFFEE and then ford is just "oh yeah i gave him like 15 cups or something"

AUGH THE GLOVES AND THE SNOW GLOBE..... "gee ford how come you get TWO presents" says emma may with nothing. LIKE HIM AND FORD HAD SUCH A GREAT CHRISTMAS AFTER THE KRAMPUS THING BUT LIKE I FEEL BAD FOR TATE MAN AND YALL ALREADY KNOW MCGUCKET CARES ABOUT HIS SON SO GODDAMN MUCH

(violently cries)

his ass is NOT afraid to use the memory gun on people like hes made people build the portal and the bunker for free and wiped their memories and hasnt been afraid to wipe ford's too like damn man. hes a little too trigger happy. he also made an entire cult because of it and then forgot he made an entire cult

he made the bunker security room. he decided it would be a good idea to crush intruders to death. not to mention all the destructive robots hes made in his crazy old man era. i love him at his best and his worst your honor

we salute 45th president mcgucket, gave out free robot spiders. and he prevented the entire covid pandemic. it's so funny to me cuz he took over northwest manor first and then the white house. i would be fine if the whole world had one ruler and it was mcgucket and you know he would find a way to turn himself into an immortal robot he will NEVER die

he's married to a racoon. has not even questioned his marriage once. that racoon is tate's step mom and i don't even think he questions it at this point either. we salute first lady of the united states raccoon wife

also give it up for parallel fiddleford!! literally from the canon "everything went right" au. portal wouldn't exist without our fidds and the quantum destabilizer wouldn't exist without parallel fidds give it up for all two canon fiddlefords carrying ford 🙏 anyways where's all the au content of that specific universe—

not to mention mcgucket's entire story arc which i really cannot put into words rn in this dumb post because its so AAUUUGH you feel me?

anyways yeah. this post is absolutely not coherent but i just think fiddleford mcgucket is neat and underrated (and as much as i love fiddauthor/fiddleauthor/fordsquared/fordford/banjoportal/etc. i feel like he's getting stuck solely in shipping LET HIM BE HIS OWN GUY PLEASE). also thank you book of bill for existing because it made me remember gravity falls was a thing i was obsessed with as a kid and looking back at everything as an adult is CRAZYYY

okay peace out love you mcgucket stans

#gravity falls #fiddleford mcgucket #old man mcgucket #mac speaks #book of bill #this is not a website dot com #← some info from both of them #mostly from journal 3 but do people even tag that

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yandereforme · 11 months ago

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OK, I was in a boring lecture with my classes, and my brain came up with an idea.

Everyone knows that trope where the main character is stuck in a time loop. Like, they are stuck, reliving the same life over and over and over again.

What if that situation happened? With the bat family becoming Yandere?

Let me explain. It starts out with the normal story of neglectful bat family. You’re probably Bruce’s kid through a one night stand of his. Then you mom tragically dies and she leaves it in her well that you are Bruce’s. Then you go to live the Manor and none of them really have time for you or pay that much attention to you, etc. etc..

You probably die due to an accident with a rogue or maybe you get into a car accident or something. The point is you die, and instead of going to the afterlife, you wake up in the car driving you to the manner for the first time.

You end up slowly living your life in a loop of one year. Overtime, you become more and more independent of the family. I’m going to say this is like your seventh life, because that’s where things get interesting.

This time, you’ve decided to just throw the whole thing out the window. You’ve tried getting to know them. You’ve tried just actively avoiding them. You’ve even tried running away very young, and you even joined them as a vigilante during your fifth life. Nothing has stopped you from dying every single time. So this time, you deciding to fuck things up. Do whatever the hell you want. And what you want is to cause some chaos.

You deliberately fuck with them. You make references to things you shouldn’t know, but always talk your way out of any situation. You casually mention things about certain vigilante, that you know will cause, drama, and deliberately ask your brothers to be around you during a certain time when you know they’re going to be on patrol. You decided that you’re going to just have fun, and like being a little chaos gremlin.

This sort of behavior is what causes the family to fully notice you. And overtime become Yandere for you. They also keep having these strange dreams where you die in front of them. They remember themselves saying things to you that they never did. All while puzzling at your knowledge of them.

You become a puzzle to them. And after a while, you have a fully Yandere bat family obsessed with you.

You must be thinking “ OP, if the reader dies again, everything go back to normal?” Well, you are wrong. Because every life that you live after that one, they will remember more and more things, and become more and more obsessed with you even from the get-go.

During the seventh life, you caused some serious chaos and left a giant impact on them. When you return to the manor for the first time in the eighth, they are going to look with you with more interest than they normally would, because something in their gut is telling them that they need to pay attention to you.

Basically, the simple version of this is that they were very neglectful of you in your first 6 lives, and didn’t pay much attention to you until your seventh life, which you decide to fuck with them. Unfortunately, you girlbossed too close to the sun and left an irreversible impression on the soul. No matter what you do, in every single life they are going to become more and more obsessed with you.

#yandere #yandere batfam x reader #time loop au #funny #gremlin reader #this came to me in the middle of a boring class #Now I will unleash it onto you

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kaythefloppa · 2 months ago

Note

How would you rewrite The Lion Guard?

Ooh, good question.

Will pre-face this by saying that I enjoy The Lion Guard and am far more forgiving towards it than others (primarily because I was in the show's target demographic when it came out nearly 10 years ago, so I had a closer attachment to/attraction towards it than, people who were old enough to see the original film drop in theaters). That being said, it has a lot of flaws, some commonly pointed out by the fandom, others not so much (and around 70% of them stem around the finale, which.. we'll get to). So here are some major things I'd rewrite about the show itself (not like, every individual episode because that would be hell lmao)

Word vomit ahead because I have too many opinions on this children's show.

Season 1:

I'd definitely include more of Nala in the pilot episode, maybe showing her personal thoughts on the matter, perhaps even teaching Kion how to fight, or a throwaway line implying that. Also, I would definitely provide explanation on how Scar got away with killing his Lion Guard, and on why Kiara became so obsessed with becoming Queen. Additionally, I'd show some background lions (i.e. non-characters because we can't let them overshadow the mains), just so that we can actually buy Simba's point on there being other lions for the guard (but like, at the end of the day, we know Kion's team will prove themselves/be better). And lastly, I'd fix the climax to where Simba would try to rescue Kiara and then somehow get injured/stuck, so the Guard would have to save both of them from the stampede. I think those main things left a bad impression towards fans outside of the target demo, even as they got better on so, I think re-tooling them a bit would save a lot of that dissonance.

This was something I really wanted to see in the show as a kid; Episodes where the main characters meet "good" animals in the same species as their villains. Jasiri's introductory episode made me think they were going to have this as a recurring theme, where each member of the guard meets an animal who they initially judge for being the same species as their counterpart villain, only to realize that they're pretty great. For example, Beshte meeting a friendly crocodile (this was before S2) Bunga protecting a cobra (or alternatively, rescuing Ushari from the hyenas), Fuli meeting a jackal that's actually honest, or Ono even working together with a friendly vulture (that part specifically I fixated on, because I had this whole story in my head about the unnamed 'third vulture' in Mzingo's flock who goes through this whole character redemption arc, but I digress). This I believe would've fixed the issue that some people had about the portrayal of predatory animals in the series. Because yeah, on a Watsonian level, these villains are in every way amoral, the Lion Guard stops them from over-hunting, not hunting in general. On a Doylist level, the ratio of evil predators to good predators is way imbalanced, and I think this approach that 9 year old me thought this show would go, would've been a huge-lifesaver for the series in that department.

The Kupatana Celebration: The jackals would attempt to steal from the Pride Landers whilst they're all distracted, leading up to the Pride Landers fighting them. I'd also change some dialouge so that Kion and the Guard wouldn't come across as though they are right for hating jackals, and so that Janja wouldn't be proven right in his attempted murder of a child by the narrative.

The Trouble with Galagoes: Makucha and Mapigano would be streamlined into one character. Not only would it save a lot of time, money, and budget just using one model, but it would show the true menace Makucha is, because he was badly nerfed in the show when he became the new Big Bad.

Lions of the Outlands: I have so many mixed opinions on this episode. On one hand, the moral is actually pretty great, a perfect mirror to Never Judge a Hyena By Its Spots. And on that note, we see more of Jasiri and her clan. On the other hand, the Outsiders are in it, for no other reason than to both tie into TLK 2, and build up to the finale, (and they fail entirely on those two merits). The one thing I'd change is make it a two-parter in the middle of the season. The first part would explain the mystery behind the Outsiders, maybe even filling in some of the legit plot-holes the second movie had with them. The second part would be where the real action and conflict begins, with Kion choosing the hyenas over lions and blasting them away to the termite mounds (and I'd easily cut the "Our New Home" to "Our Old Home.)" Vitani would also have more of a presence in this episode, mainly so that it'll be less jarring when we see her again as the successor to the main cast.

And on another note, I would have Janja team up with Kion and Jasiri against Zira as a temporary alliance. It would just seem like an interesting idea. The point of the episode is Kion's views being turned on their head as he realizes that the lions he's meeting aren't as open-minded or kind as him. Having him come to the defense of his most hated rival, even temporarily, would've added to that juxtaposition, and maybe foreshadow his redemption.

I'd definitely rewrite Bunga to make his personality better. Don't get me wrong, it does get better in the show, but in early S1, they try too hard to recapture the magic of Timon and Pumbaa's comedy from the original. It'd be much better to allow him to serve as a comic relief on his own scale to allow a better first impression of him as one of the main characters.

Allow an introduction episode for Ushari. For someone who is supposed to be the hidden secondary antagonist of the series, he gets no introduction episode, and no revelance beyond just cameos and running gags; So unlike Makuu, you don't resonate with him enough to accept him as a key player later on down the line. There was an episode plotline involving a cobra harassing some songbirds that was never greenlit because it was inaccurate t o cobra behavior, but I think Artistic License aside, it would've made okay groundwork for Ushari to appear.

More non-lion characters. In a show where the overall message is "different animals can do just as well as, if not better than lions," and featuring the different animals that contribute to the Circle of Life, they did pretty well, but I would've loved them do more. Episodes with painted dogs, and the values of communication. Episodes with caracal cats where the heroes learn not to underestimate, episodes with that one African Rock Python that encourages boundaries, episodes with secratarybirds where you can stomp the shit out of grumpy bastards who want to kill children. Cool shit.

I'd tone down Kion's roar a lot. I don't mind it in a fantasy setting, but I think a lot of tension, conflicts, and character arcs are undermined by it. I would've preferred it if we had episodes in Season 1 where Kion slowly learns how to use the Roar's powers, akin to Elena of Avalor's Scepter of Light/Night story arcs. Tie that in with him speaking with Mufasa. The more he controls the power of the spirits, the more he is able to speak to them. In the meantime, I'd allow some villains' defeats to be accreddited to the characters themselves, for example, Cheezi and Chungu defeat Nne and Tano themselves, Anga, Ono, and Hadithi being able to chase off the vultures, or Hodari and Makuu both working together to drive off Kiburi.

I'd change the episode arrangement. Mainly to allow future seasons to actually start with the episodes that begin their respective seasons' arcs. The first 5 episodes of Season 2 would be placed near the end of Season 1 to establish a mini-arc about the dry season coming up soon, with the last of these 5 episodes being the Savannah Summit, showing Makuu's redemption and signifying that there's gonna be a change in tune. Then we'd get Trail to Udugu as the Season 1 finale, which would wrap up Kion and Kiara's sibling rivalry from the pilot and show Simba firsthand how well Kion's team is structured through its diversity. It would register as a perfect season finale without there being a heavy ongoing arc for it to cap off.

Season 2

The Rise of Scar would serve as the Season 2 premiere (which it originally was supposed to be, until it was pushed up 5 episodes). And while kicks off the best portion of the show, (S2) it does ultimately also cap itself off in the worst portion of the show (S3), so some stuff I would change:

Ushari's heel-face-turn. It sucks. Even ignoring the messy implications of having the only snake character become a generic bad guy because "evil venomous snake," it's bad character writing. Not only do we have no proper introduction to his character, not only was his prior relevance relegated to background appearances, but his motivation is extremely hollow, so much so that it's forgotten entirely by the time the episode is over and replaced with a new one (that also comes up out of nowhere and has fuck all to do with anything). More than once in future episodes is it implied that Ushari wants reptiles to rule the Pride Lands, and honestly, I think that would've/should've been his motivation for his betrayal. Maybe he sees how other reptiles struggle during the dry season and the Lion Guard is so pre-occupied with the other animals and disasters that he winds up feeling neglected and angry. This is what turns him to villainy.

I would have Mzingo in on the Scar ressurection plotline. One beef I have with S2 is that Mzingo, who was the duel antaognist of the pilot, gets sidelined entirely. Ushari essentially replaces him as the hyenas' spy, with several scenes clearly resembling that of the pilot (right down to the song, which is essentially diet Tonight we Strike). It wouldn't have done much to add Mzingo in, but it would've made sense, and allow for interesting interactions between Ushari and Mzingo.

Instead of Janja, it's Ushari who causes Kion to roar by revealing his betrayal and threatening his family. This does water down Janja a bit, but again, with the idea that he'll be redeemed in due time, you have to put some limit on how far his villainous actions go.

Rescue in the Outlands. Good. God. On its own, it's perfectly fine, but Season 3 manages to make it retroactively worse. If they wanted to give hints that Janja was redeemable, redeem him at all, and imply a ship-tease between him and Jasiri, they should've dialed back some of the shit he does to allow him come across as less iredeemable. The writers didn't have to have him try to incinerate Jasiri and the cubs, and they didn't have to have him openly mock them as they're about to explode, but because they did, it shoots his rushed redemption arc right in the bloody foot. The episode would've worked fine with some workaround.

The workaround I would have for that? Well, I would have it be where Janja chases Jasiri's clan out of the Outlands so they're forced to hide in the Pride Lands until the Lion Guard helps them take it back. We'd see that Janja is content with Jasiri making it out alive under the assumption that she wouldn't come back. Still technically evil, but not anything way over the line. This would also allow Simba and Nala to be introduced to Jasiri, overcoming their own prejudice and bias about hyenas like Kion did, which would make for a far more entertaining subplot than... ugh... Thurston. And in the end, Simba and Nala help Jasiri and the Lion Guard flush out Janja.

The Bite of Kenge: I would include Makuu, just for the awesome factor, and the biology reference: Because crocodiles and monitor lizards are mortal enemies due to how the latter preys on the hatchlings of the former. Makuu absolutely rocking Kenge's shit would be so awesome. And also we'd get Makini and Makuu sharing dialouge (which I swear to god, does not happen at all in the show, FUCK!)

The first half of Season 2 would have Ushari as a red-herring, with several attacks from Outlanders accreddited to him. It isn't until the midseason finale where the Guard discovers that Scar is alive and realizes that he's the real threat they need to take out.

Speaking of the midseason, I would cut out Sumu entirely. He's a cool character and all, but I find it hilarious how not once does Scar consider sending Ushari, a cobra, in to bite the enemy team. Especially since the species of scorpion that Sumu is happens to be non-lethal (whoops!). Anyways, I'd have it be where Ushari takes Sumu's role of poisoning the king, biting him on the tail. This would invoke fear into the other Pride Landers, who deem him to be the big threat to the Pride Lands (i.e. red herring). Ushari's betrayal would be a secondary conflict in the episode, as they still struggle with the idea that one of their own could turn on their home. Ultimately, Scar's return is revealed, and that Ushari's betrayal was in the means of bringing forward a worse threat to the Pride Lands, which sets the tone for the remainder of the season.

Speaking of which, I would keep Kenge in. According to the writers, he left the army off-screen to avoid getting blasted by Kion's Roar, which to me, seems like a clever way of saying "We couldn't get the royalties to re-hire our Game of Thrones guest-star onto our preschooler show as a series regular." But like, I think having him stay on the army would just add more man-power, because why introduce him if he's not gonna play a role in the final battle.

An episode where Scar attempts to contact Zira to be in his army, but the Guard thwards him. Again, just a minor change. Also, once again, we'd see Vitani, possibly her facing off against Kion, to further the idea that she strongly rivals Kion in ferocity, which sets up the finale in a more natural light.

The Hyena Resistance would show both Kion and Jasiri rescuing Janja. That way, his redemption would come across as less of him crushing on Jasiri and more of him having his worldview legitmately changed. Additionally, we would have Kion or Jasiri mention the true cause of Scar's death to Janja, who would deny it at first, listing it as lies.

Pride Landers Unite and Fire From the Sky are meshed into one plotline, so Anga is introduced earlier on. I find it stupid that even though Mzingo is clearly on Scar's side, they don't at all consider him a suspect for the fire sticks. Plus having all of the Outlanders face off against the Pride Landers would be more thematic this way. Additionally, I'd have more members on the team, such as Big Baboon, Thurston, and even some of the giraffes.

Much like with S1, I would change the episode ordering around a lot, mainly because I think some events and interactions do not make sense when viewed by airing order. For example, the Hyena Resistance builds up to the idea that Janja would redeem himself, and the skinks also report Janja's hesitation to Scar, but that apparently means nothing when Janja is working with Scar two episodes after this one. And I feel like Kion gathering forces to help him defeat Scar would be the inciting incident for the end of the final battle.

The order I would arrange S2b in: The Scorpion's Sting -> The Wisdom of Kongwe -> The Kilio Valley Fire -> Undercover Kinyonga -> The Zebra Mastermind -> The Underground Adventure -> Beshte and the Beast -> The Queen's Visit -> The Hyena Resistance -> Pride Landers Unite/Fire From the Sky -> Cave of Secrets -> The Fall of Mizimu Grove

The Fall of Mizimu Grove would serve as the Season 2 finale (as it serves as a climax of the ongoing conflict, but not in a way that ends it). We'd show Jasiri and her clan, Ushari and his skinks, as well as Anga and the birds taking part in the battle before Scar himself is revealed. Otherwise, the episode is mainly unchanged, and once again, the finale of the second season.

Season 3:

I posted a rewrite of S3 onto the Lion King subreddit, but in the context of a rewrite of the grand series, things go differently.

Battle for the Pride Lands would be expanded into a 6-episode story arc, in which the older characters make their final stand in the fight against Scar. I take issue with the fact that for years, they built up Scar as a force to be wreckoned with, dragged the arc into S3, only to end it entirely there. I've entertained the idea of the special being the finale to S2, but I think this approach also works, just to allow the audience to get settled in with the new 'norm' just as a way to fix some of the pacing and writing issues I found in what was otherwise, the best episode of the series.

In this 6-episode story arc, I would allow a redemption arc for Janja in the premiere episode, so that he could have more time to atone for his mistakes. Janja would redeem himself in the premiere after realizing the truth behind Scar's death and that Jasiri and Kion were telling the truth. Janja would immediately leave Scar's army and encounter Jasiri. "A New Way to Go" would be a duet between them. Eventually, let's say Scar traps Janja's clan and Kion's Guard in the lair, and as they're all swimming away, Kion gets stuck and Janja is able to rescue him from drowning. This allows a heart-to-heart between them which also extends to the rest of his clan, Jasiri's clan, and even some of the Pride Landers. The episode ends with Janja joining forces with the Pride Lands, giving them the info they need to beat Scar once and for all.

In the second episode of this arc, we focus on the Outlanders, specifically their reaction to having almost killed Janja. One other beef I have with the special is how the Outlanders besides Janja are all given a backseat, and are eventually just hand-woven redemptions and written off entirely. So my rewrite allows more character development at the end of their story arc. We'd see scenes with Mzingo, him feeling regretful over having almost killed his partner (either accidentally or purposefully). And we'd focus on Dogo and his siblings, who took a backseat in S2, but would now be older. We'd see what Dogo was up to in S2, maybe watching in fear as his parents and siblings would get into more dangerous situations. He'd be old enough to fight, but he's completely burnt out and disillusioned. Essentially we'd see him get the redemption arc he was robbed of. The episode would end with him leaving, and Kijana staying (to show the idea that some people can change, but others can't). The episode ends with Scar threatening the remainder of his army with death if they turned against him, which is what gets them to join his team, but internally, they know that Janja was right for turning on them. Meanwhile, Ushari is still as evil as ever.

Episode 3 of this arc would focus on Kion enlisting help from the other kingdoms; The Theluji Mountains and the Backlands, in order for the impending battle ahead. This would allow some old characters like Sokwe, the Gorilla Princes, Dhahabu, and Badilli to return, and we'd learn more about their history and origins. Meanwhile, we see Scar recruit Makucha on his army to replace Janja.

Episode 4 of this arc would follow through on the redemption arcs. Specifically involving a moral in which not everyone will forgive you, but that shouldn't stop you from trying to be a better person. I think this episode would involve Janja and Dogo helping Ma Tembo and the elephants and hippos take back Kilio Valley and Big Springs, which puts a huge dent in Scar's plans. Perhaps Zito and Johari are those who choose not to forgive Janja and Dogo, but Ma Tembo and Basi do. Plus Janja and Dogo would make a really funny duo.

Episode 5 delves into Scar's past. I think the biggest problem with the backstory in the show is that it is entirely tacked on and is only there for plot contrivance. An entire episode would've been more serviceable, especially with the direction they were headed with. I'd change the backstory entirely. Here, I'd have it be where a rouge lion clawed Scar, and then having the cobra spit at him before he roars them away. He is hailed as a hero throughout the Pride Lands, feeding into his ego until it becomes too big for him, so he plots to overthrow Mufasa. When they refuse, he teams up with the hyenas to get rid of them. He lures them into the Outlands where he roars at them, and the hyenas hide what's left. The hyena clan take the fall, and Scar is left off the hook, but powerless. This is what Scar decides to use as inspiration to defeat Kion once and for all. Meanwhile, Kion and the Lion Guard search through the paintings of Scar's past and see what the audience sees in the flashbacks. At the end, they discover a cave painting of Askari putting out a fire at the Tree of Life, which re-inforces their belief that the Roar can and will stop Scar.

Episode 6 is the big special that caps everything off. The Lion Guard take their battle with Scar into the Outlands. A large majority of the battle portion of the original special would take up this episode. We'd see everyone join in, including Kinyonga, Badilli, the baboons and zebras, we'd see Ushari, Kenge, and the skinks facing off against the reptiles, Simba and his lionesses fighting jackals, Timon and Pumbaa causing mayhem, it's this whole big fucking thing. Eventually the Lion Guard is able to defeat them, but Ushari and Makucha double back. Ushari bites Kion, but it's established that it's only a small dosage of venom that will affect his mind, then Makucha scratches him, giving him a scar.

The big thing I'd change here is that I'd actually have Kion roar at the volcano to make it erupt. Jasiri and Kiara help lead the Pridelanders and Outlanders away from the lava flow. This would allow a set-up for Jasiri eventually ruling the Outlanders, and establish future events of the second movie where Kiara is willing to unite opposing sides in order for a brighter future for all. Meanwhile, the Lion Guard find themselves trapped as the lava surrounds them. Scar taunts them in their final hour, but that is when Kion decides that instead of destroying his enemies for injuring him, he offers them forgiveness, using the Roar to summon the Lions of the Past to destroy Scar. Makucha runs off in anger, and we get the same moment of Ushari's death, which would give off the idea that whilst offering forgiveness is good, some people are too far gone.

I'd make the Mark of Evil more well-defined by stating that Kion will lose control of the Roar and act out more with the small amount of venom within him. Not the whole "you will forget the difference between right and wrong" bullshit. The journey to the Tree of Life begins.

I'd rewrite the villains: A lot. This post did a far better rewrite of the S3 villains than I ever could, especially keeping in the theme of each villain being a 'counterpart' of the main heroes, so I'll link ya there. But yeah, I would allow Makucha to remain the intense threat he is, and give the villains' squad more numbers. I'd also probably switch out Chuluun and Varya's species. A tiger would be absolutely terrifying as a villain, and Varya and her cubs being attacked would be a lot less stupid if she were a smaller cat. I'd also have Mama Binturong be paired against Ono, as they are both the "brains" of their respective teams. Maybe Ono is able to use his knowledge on porcupines/binturongs to guide Bunga over to the Tuliza stash, and Mama Binturong targets him. I would also objectively have Mpishi in the army, she was robbed of a re-appearance.

I'd probably change the animation and voice-direction on Azaad to look younger, because he strikes as way too old for Fuli. And I'd probably keep their dynamic platonic.

Friends to the End is rehauled entirely. The episode assassinated Bunga's character development, and was low-stakes overall in ways that just do the main characters a disservice. Have him actually be worried as to what would happen to Kion, have his friends disagree with him thinking he's wrong. Have Bunga be the one to challenge Kion when he mouths off at Beshte, and have the titular song actually be sung to Kion.

Change the Night Pride. The Tree of Life is meant to be a congregation of biodiversity, so it would only make sense that its protectors be a mixed group of animals and not just more bland-looking lions (Asiatic lion portrayal is appreciated, but I think this was the wrong way to go at it). Once again, saw someone else do a far better rewrite of this, with the royal family as tigers, and with Nirmala and Surak as a dhole and buffalo, respectively.

I'd change Rani's character. A LOT. I think part of the reason why Rani has become such a divisive and controversial character in the fandom is because of her lack of accountability. She doesn't apologize to Kion and the Guard for her part in the misunderstanding, she doesn't apologize them for accusing them of leading Makucha and co. there, and even when Kion and Rani have seemingly come eye-to-eye in Long Live the Queen, the next episode continues to have Rani talk down to Kion, saying he has "potential" and not apologizing. I like when characters have flaws, but it's not satisfying when they don't acknowledge those flaws, apologize, and grow. Having Rani and Baliyo apologize towards the Guard, like say, at the end of Little Old Ginterbong, and gradually learning from their impulsive mistakes would be good character development, and it would allow audiences to get more used to Rani.

More episodes at the Tree of Life. One big issue with the show's ending is that it up and puts so much limelight on the Tree of Life in the finale when it's only been present for over 9 episodes. That's not enough time to get us to care, especially if your main character(s) will be moving in there by the finale. We should've had more episodes at the tree to learn about its history, how it's structured as a kingdom, the biodiversity there. Maybe even tie in with the other hanging threads of lore such as the Evil Lions of the Past, Askari's connection to the Tree of Life, his discovery of the Roar of the Elders, and the prophecy on the Roar returning to the Tree of Life. One of the writers themselves even said that they had a vision for the Night Pride's backstory including the disappearance of Rani and Baliyo's parents and the origin of Rani's scar, that, because of the limited episodes they had planned for the final season never actually made it into the series. If Season 2 can have nearly 30 episodes, then Season 3 can come close to that mark, especially when it's the end of the story and you need to put your all into it.

I would change Binga into a sloth-bear. This is actually a key detail of canon divergence in my fanfic, Roar Towards the Future, but to re-iterate, I HATE canon Binga with a passion. Lazy, unoriginal, and reeks of a lot of tired, worn out tropes from the 2000's. And yeah, it's an interspecies relationship, but in a world where the animals can talk sing, and communicate with each other, would it have hurt to change the species at least? Also, we get an Ono solo song because we were fucking robbed.

I'd change the specifics of Kion's healing, where he is cured of the venom, but still is unable to control the Roar, so Nirmala continues the healing, to which Kion realizes is not physical anymore, it's emotional, and that him mastering the Roar represents him finally having both his body and mind at peace. I really didn't like how S3a built up the venom to be Kion's problem that he needed fixing, only for S3b to say, "nope, it's just trauma," and have his healing focus around that. It's a good idea on paper, especially if you view the venom as a metaphor, but in reality, the way it's executed just gives off the idea that mental/physical health issues are one in the same thing in a box, and that treating one will inherently and unoequivically treat the other, which uhm... is a terrible message to have in a kids' show. They should've not brought up the venom at all and have that be the message from the start, or resolve the venom plot-line and point out how that's not where the healing journey ends, because the end-result makes it seem like the writers just forced the venom in there as an excuse to write Kion out of the Pride Lands in time for TLK 2, with no thought forbeyond plot contrivance.

I'd have the Lion Guard age from teenagers to young adults in S3, starting with the episode Long Live the Queen, to give off the idea that the Guard has stayed at the Tree of Life for a while to the point where defending it from the villains/Kion's healing has become the new norm. According to the writers, they wanted them to remain teenagers until the end, as a contrast to Kiara being an adult, but I think that shoots their story in the foot when it's somewhat a coming of age story, as well as the marriage thing in the finale, so I would personally have them shown to be grown up starting in the episode of Janna's death. I'd also have the origin of Rani's scar be explained. And I'd also establish closure for Sarabi by having Kion say he never met any of his grandparents. I think Sarabi deserved at least some closure in the series.

The Lake of Reflection flashback confuses me so much, because like, Janja is a teen, presumably an older teen when Kion is a cub, I highly doubt he'd be this tiny ass cub when Kion was a toddler. I would just have the flashback include everyone's S1 models pre-Return of the Roar.

I would probably have the final battle at the Tree of Life be a mirror to Pride Landers Unite, where the animals of the Tree of Life help the Lion Guard and Night Pride defeat Makucha and his gang. I'd also have the Rani/Kion romance be a separate episode on its own, which would then end with the cliffhanger of Kion being asked to stay.

Oh boy, the finale. Basically, the main thing I'd change is that it'd be an extended episode, possibly a double-length episode, or even triple-length like the Elena of Avalor finale, just to wrap everything up. Vitani's Guard is made of a mixture of different species on the Lion Guard. You can even keep the all female aspect, just have them be different animals than lions. You'd expand more on the TLK 2 callbacks (i.e. mentioning Nuka, suckers!), wrap up more character arcs, have Vitani and her team actually earn her moment (like say, defeating a new enemy, or maybe Makucha's army comes back and Vitani saves the day). I'd cut the entire bullshit contest, it is so stupid. And by the end, Kion chooses to give up the Roar and stay at the Tree of Life with Rani, BUT the rest of his friends stay at the Pride Lands, (including Makini, because she deserved to stay). The ending isn't focused around Kion and Rani's teenage wedding (because for one, they wouldn't be teens) but it would focus on the animals of the Pride Lands and Tree of Life commemorating Kion's former Lion Guard for all of their years of defending the Circle of Life, ending on a reworked version of "Here Comes the Lion Guard" from the soundtrack.

And lastly, (this is just wish-bait). An epilouge scene showing a reunion between Kion's former Guard in the Pride Lands, depicting the new lives they lead years into the future. As the sun begins to rise, they all head to Pride Rock just in time for a royal celebration; The presentation of Queen Kiara's second-born cub, who will lead the Lion Guard of the next generation. Roll the credits!

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