#this story hurts btw my god its not a fun time for either of them

[starlightsruby]

Heyy so about that AU-

Theres A LOT of art currently im gonna post slowly over time but these were some of the first drawings i did on the story. heres the summary so far also:

look forward to more art coming soon!

[funnyscienceman]

Ok but like WHYY did ubisoft have to insist with the one game a year thing. Why couldnt they let syndicate cook in the oven more. Why do they have THREE queer men in the same game and not do ANYTHING with them!!!

Like yes, yes, i get it, i get wanting to for once make a story in a fun setting where you dont have to think about real life prejudice and hardships and bigotry and just have characters be silly, i love that too. I do! And id be all for that if doing it just didnt waste a potentially banger study of the characters and the setting ;-;

Like god i go back and forth on this constantly. I already love syndicate as it is, i think it's fun and neat and the happy gaming vibes about it is core to its identity, it's just that simultaneous to that, three queer men in the same game!!!

like GOD im still miffed that there are only, like, two or three fics about this, and so far i havent found any discussion or anything of it, but oh my god how different all three of them are from each other. You could do so much just with having any of them in the same room — and they are often enough in the same room (jacob and either ned or roth at a time), but nothing's really done there!

we have roth who sees fcking nothing wrong with getting kids hurt, because he doesnt actually care about anyone or anything, he's just some fucking joker wannabe that yeah, sure, probably has some anger and resentment at society because he's a gay man in his 40s or 50s by now, but jesus fucking christ retaliation against homophobia does not equal rampant needless unproductive violence roth!!!

then we have ned, who — i mean he doesnt ever give his opinion on whether kids deserve any respect or anything but considering in every other department he's pretty much just Some Guy, it'd be fair to assume he also has the extremely average stance of 'dont fcking kill kids and dont blow up buildings for no good reason??' in the grand scheme of the templar-assassin stuff he has just about as much relevance as roth: roth was just the boss of the blighters, ned just finances the fryes by virtue of them working for him. He probably doesnt even know about it, and tbh i dont even know if he'd care??? But like i imagine roth doesnt care in the way of 'as long as you dont get in my way, it's all set dressing,' ned i imagine would be smth like 'are yall fckin serious? are you kidding me rn? i have to skirt around transphobes on a daily basis, now youre telling me there's a secret society on top of that with even worse ideas?? What the fuck???'

like uh, not caring about it as in 'I cant deal with this rn i need a nap'

HE'S JUST AN EXTREMELY REGULAR PERSON (besides the crime lord stuff) IS WHAT IM GETTING AT.

then there's jacob, who's the youngest out of these guys btw, fckin 21 good god he should be at the club not trying to disassemble systemic oppression— ANYWAY

(ned is 27-28 over the course of the game, btw; we dont actually have a solid timeline for anything, just the year, so tbh jacob could've also been 20 and not 21 yet during the game. both he and ned have late birthdays, just a month apart)

so, yknow, being extremely early 20-somethings, both frye twins just take a train to london completely on impulse and dive headfirst into undoing the templars that've had an iron grip over the city for basically as long as they've been alive, yknow, as you do; and throughout the game jacob has to deal with goddamn daddy issues and fighting with his sister and insecurity and trying to be an assassin — and that's a lot for a guy to handle!! Especially one who's still just a couple years out of being a teenager! That's a fucking lot and if the devs are right, then he hasnt even realized that he's bi yet! Not until roth fucking kisses him while jacob's got a knife in his throat for the aforementioned indiscriminate, unproductive violence!

i mean, granted, yeah there were gay undertones during sequence 8, but i have to admit my bias here because i honest to god cannot take those missions seriously. Roth fucking preaches this and that about freedom and whatnot and then im plopped into the mission and it's the most rule-heavy shit ive ever seen in my short life as an assassin's creed player. Like what the hell, those missions were atrocious. Apprently i need to detonate the bombs a specific way, i cant just shoot them from a distance, i have to hold a button crouching down right next to the bombs, and then run the hell away! I have to avoid THIS and THAT while kidnapping xyz! Like there's freddy's apprehend missions and then there's THIS.

at least with ned's missions all you have to do is get the shit and go… i'm still salty that ubisoft cut his questline because they fucking insist on releasing a game a year >:((

my battery's dying. All these guys are different flavors of queer on top of just being pretty different and pretty similar in various ways, and there's just… barely anything about it. Ned especially, since he's just a quest giver whose screentime totals to, like, 2-5 minutes. I just wish they really did more with the setting; not just the queerness and these three specifically, but like, evie, henry, the class conflict — like there are shreds of it, seeds, but there's not much before you kill starrick and credits roll :((

idk. im just gonna refresh ao3 again cjemddjekjx

[planetpiastri]

ooo maybe 28 for fanboy?? or number 8? buzzing over ur writing btw

i went with #8 for this bc i just think that’s soo cute<33 i love writing fanboy this was so fun

8. accidently hitting the other one with a snowball meant for their friend

word count: 1.7k

It was snowing in San Diego. As in San Diego, California. 

You looked up to check if the sky was falling, but just got a few more soft flakes to land on your cheeks. You couldn’t help but smile in childlike wonder, spreading your hands and letting the tiny crystals collect on your sleeves. When your best friend had told you he was back in town at TOPGUN and he wanted to see you on his one weekend off, you couldn’t have predicted something like this happening.

His voice broke through your reverie at that exact moment. “Hey, you with us?”

You blinked, looking over to where he was standing with another pilot—the callsign ‘Phoenix’ seemed to ring a bell. She looked just as awed as you were at the sudden flurry, but she was better at hiding it.

“Yes,” you said, jogging to catch up with them. “Sorry. I can’t believe this. We haven’t gotten snow in—”

“Twenty years?” interrupted Reuben, holding out a palm and watching as a few flakes collected in it. “Thirty?”

“Something like that,” murmured Phoenix. Then she blinked and shook herself. “Sorry—we’re gonna be late. Everyone’s waiting for us at the Hard Deck. Come on.”

By the time Reuben’s car had rattled its way off base and down to the beach, the light flurry had turned into a proper fall. When he parked outside the Hard Deck, he nervously squatted by his tires, checking to make sure they were handling the cold okay. 

Phoenix laughed at the sight of you both anxiously preening over the vehicle. “California kids,” she said with an amused shake of her head. “Come on, let’s go.”

The Hard Deck was crammed with officers and pilots who were trying to escape the sudden snow, but when the three of you muscled your way to the bar, Reuben looked around in confusion and said, “I don’t see them.”

It was Phoenix who flagged down Penny the bartender and asked where their friends had gone. In reply, Penny just smirked and jerked her thumb over her shoulder, gesturing back towards the oceanfront behind her.

“You’re kidding,” said Reuben. 

Penny shook her head. 

“Is this Fanboy’s idea?”

“He said something about a snowball fight,” said Penny coyly.

Reuben dropped his head and groaned, but Phoenix tugged you both by the sleeves, saying, “Come on.”

You’d heard tale of this ‘Fanboy’ from Reuben—his new backseater from Whidbey Island, a charming and rambunctious WSO who’d barely been out of TOPGUN three years. It was hard to tell from the stories if Reuben hated having a backseater or admired the kid’s tenacity; maybe Reuben didn’t even know himself. Either way, at the mention of his callsign, you’d be lying if your interest wasn’t piqued.

Phoenix led the way onto the back deck and farther down the steps, onto the sand and snow where a bunch of grown adults were bundled in thick jackets and hurling snowballs that were fifty percent sand at each other, giggling like little kids.

“Oh my god,” said Reuben.

“Phoenix!” wailed one of the men on the edge of the group, taking a few steps up the beach towards you. “Thank god you’re here! They’re killing me! Ack!” 

Right on cue, a different pilot nailed the guy in the back of the head, sending him staggering and brushing ice and wet sand out of his hair, wiping at his glasses.

“Hey!” cried Phoenix, already taking off at a run towards the group, bent double to gather a snowball of her own as she went. “Pick on somebody your own size, you leave my backseater alone!”

“Children,” said Reuben quietly, shaking his head. “They’re a bunch of children.”

Piff. A pitiful handful of snow and sand scattered across the back of his Carhartt. Without turning around, he said, “You’re about to enter a whole world of hurt.”

An utterly childish giggle ripped its way out of your chest and you began to sprint across the sand towards the larger group, listening to Reuben give chase behind you, his laugh loud and raucous across the expanse. Blood pounded in your ears as you ducked between two burly pilots, crouching to gather up a few snowballs. It hadn’t been snowing long enough to get any genuinely good powder—the balls were mostly ice and grit—but no one seemed to care. The novelty of a beachside snowball fight in San Diego was too alluring for pesky things like logic to interfere.

All around you, the pilots worked as a team, turning this silly childhood game into a ground-level dogfight.

“Coyote, heads up!”

“On your six, Phoenix!”

“Break right, Rooster, break right!”

Of course, you didn’t have a callsign, but everyone pretty quickly picked up on the fact that you were Reuben’s friend, giving you the complimentary nickname ‘Payday.’ Maybe it lacked some originality, but it was forged in the heat of battle, which you thought was pretty cool. 

It was the cry of, “Payday, help me out!” that screwed everything up.

You weren’t sure who’d called for your aid; maybe Rooster, or even Yale. But you jumped to your feet, snowball in hand and ready to defend anyways. Across from you, someone else stood up: a tan man with short, dark hair just visible underneath a gray beanie pulled low over his ears. His strange posture confused you briefly: his arm flung forward, one leg pitched out behind him, his grin huge and white and destabilizing.

Then icy-sharp pain bloomed across your cheek and you fell backwards, hitting the sand hard.

Everyone froze.

Someone—Hangman, you thought—shouted, “Shit, Mickey, not the face!”

The one who hit you—Mickey, you presumed—cried, “I was aiming for Rooster’s shoulder, I swear!”

Your ears were ringing and your face was so cold that it was numb. You lifted one dizzy hand to your cheek, stunned to realize it came away with blood, ice, and sand all combined on your fingers. There were a few people kneeling next to you in the sand, but most of them gave you space, which you were grateful for. Reuben had hold of your arm and was shaking it gently, saying, “Are you with me?”

“I’m okay,” you grunted, shifting mostly upright and trying to wipe the sand out of your eyes. “Just caught me by surprise, that’s all.”

“Are you okay?” a new voice asked, and a firm hand grasped your forearm, hauling you smoothly to your feet despite Reuben’s protests of, “Easy, Mickey!”

You were prepared to have some sort of biting retort or withering remark at Mickey’s expense, but when you met his eyes, the words fell away. His grip on your arm was firm and present, grounding you to the sand and snow beneath your shoes. While there was a definitive mischief-making tilt to his mouth, there was no humor in his eyes at the moment. His brows were knit and his gaze was fixed on the spot on your cheek where you knew you’d been struck.

Realizing you’d never answered his question, you stammered, “Oh, I-I’m okay. It was just an accident.”

“I’m so sorry,” Mickey rushed on. “I was aiming for Rooster behind you, and you stood up as I was throwing, I wasn’t trying to—”

Then Rooster himself was there, pushing in between the two of you and giving you a little more breathing room. “Careful, Fanboy,” he said, his tone light but authoritative. “I don’t know if Penny is equipped to treat talking-induced concussions.”

You blinked, something nagging at the back of your head as you glanced between Reuben, Rooster, and Mickey. Something familiar, like you were staring at a puzzle missing one piece, and the piece had just been handed to you. And then, like wires connecting—

Oh.

Fanboy.

“Oh!” you yelped, taking half a step back. “Mickey’s—that’s—you’re Fanboy?” You glanced back and forth between him and Reuben, who’d buried his face in his hands.

“Wait,” said Fanboy, looking as lost as you’d felt a few moments ago. “You know who I am?”

“You’re the backseater!” you blurted. “From Whidbey Island! Right, Rueben? This is him?”

Before Reuben could speak, Fanboy said with a huge, shit-eating grin, “You’ve been telling your friends about me, Payback?”

Reuben stepped forward, his hands extended placatingly. “Okay, this is getting—”

“I’ve been so curious,” you interrupted, side-stepping your friend so you could keep talking to Fanboy. “From day one, he has always had something to say about you.”

Fanboy grinned, one corner of his mouth pulling up higher than the other. “Good things, I hope.”

“Fifty-fifty,” you said, matching his grin.

“Okay, maybe you should go take a seat at the bar,” Reuben said, laughing nervously and taking you by the elbow. He glanced over your head, gesturing with his other hand. “Hey, Bob, could you give us a hand over here?”

Before Bob could react, Fanboy had come up to your other side, easily slipping your hand through the crook of his arm and waving Reuben off with an easy, “I got it from here, Payback. You guys finish up the snowball fight, okay?”

Reuben looked like he’d rather swallow a lemon than finish up the snowball fight, but he stayed quiet and watched as Fanboy led you up the beach and back onto the deck. You half-expected your best friend to come storming up after you in less than five minutes, but soon enough, the group had gone back to their childish games, whooping and hollering and having a great time.

Meanwhile, Mickey sat you down at a table where you could look out the glass and still see the snow falling on the water. Penny gave him some basic first-aid supplies, and he cleaned up your small cut, saying like he was almost impressed, “You’re gonna have a gnarly shiner, probably. Sorry about that.”

“It’s okay,” you said, feeling strangely sleepy as his fingers brushed at your cheekbone, sending chills down your spine—and not from the cold. “Makes me look cool.”

He smiled widely at that, like he didn’t even notice he was doing it. Feeling strangely shy, you shifted back to front, watching as Phoenix and Rooster worked together to pepper Hangman with a fierce bombardment of snowballs. The flakes over the beach fell like glitter, shimmering and twinkling in the dark late-afternoon light, and without meaning to, you murmured, “It’s beautiful.”

“It really is,” replied Mickey, but when you glanced back at him, you had a feeling he wasn’t talking about the snow.

[birthday-of-music]

1-12 FOR THE WRITING ASKS !!! hi :3333

1. What font do you write in? Do you actually care or is that just the default setting?

uhm. i uh. write on the notes app. sometimes on word though and i just use calibri bc default

2. If you had to give up your keyboard and write your stories exclusively by hand, could you do it? If you already write everything by hand, a) are you a wizard and b) pen or pencil?

GOD NO I COULD NOT.. fun fact i never fixed my bad pencil grip when i was really young so i hold pens weird as shit and it hurts after a little while. english exam had me dying every five minutes shaking my wrist out and that was only like 600-700 words i think

3. What is your writing ritual and why is it cursed?

another fun story i used to write about a hundred words every night on my old ipod that i kept in my room before sleeping. said ipod was kind of halfway to exploding. like uh. that one “pillow” post with the dangerous battery. iwdont do that anymore though and i threw out the ipod everything is fine

4. What’s a word that makes you go absolutely feral?

I DONT KNOW UM. in general i have a notebook full of pretty words (ethereal, golden, eternity, that kind of like. overly fancy and poetic shit)

5. Do you have any writing superstitions? What are they and why are they 100% true?

uh. i dont think so im kind of basic

6. What is your darkest fear about writing?

i guess that when i post something people will hate it? like. outright hate it and say its bad and stuff?

7. What is your deepest joy about writing?

i suppose the opposite of the above but also sometimes ill look back at my writing from a year ago that isnt like. in my mind anymore and ill be able to read it and enjoy it as not something i wrote? bc ill forget i wrote it and then i get to enjoy stuff that is extremely catered to me lmao

8. If you had to write an entire story without either action or dialogue, which would you choose and how would it go?

oh dialogue definitely theres something kind of fun about writing stuff without dialogue idk what it just. is.

9. Do you believe in ghosts? This isn’t about writing I just wanna know

uh. nope not really

10. Has a piece of writing ever “haunted” you? Has your own writing haunted you? What does that mean to you?

UM. same as you all the bright places. also the fault in our stars. very clear what types of books i like isnt it. also this fic which is saying a lot because i dont care about genshin anymore but every time i think about it it hurts.

11. Do you believe in the old advice to “kill your darlings?” Are you a ruthless darling assassin? What happens to the darlings you murder? Do you have a darling graveyard? Do you grieve?

uh. i like hurting my faves but only if there is comfort otherwise i die inside. every time i write hurt no comfort i lose a bit more of my sanity

12. If a genie offered you three writing wishes, what would they be? Btw if you wish for more wishes the genie turns all your current WIPs into Lorem Ipsum, I don’t make the rules

i always wish for more wishes but lorem ipsum i could never… three wishes uh. one that every time i write a character i can characterise them right. two that when i proofread i never miss any typos. and three um.. the ability to have continuous motivation to write a multichaptered fic

[cipheress-to-k-pop]

Hello there! Can you write hcs for Tim with a demigodess!reader please? Congrats on your 600 followers btw^^

Tim Drake x Demigoddess!Reader

A/N: Thank you so much! So I’m totally dense about greek myths and stuff and I was gonna make her Thor’s daughter at first but then I forgot about that I did Hades but when I remembered it was already written so oh well

You were the daughter of Hades and Persephone

You had kind of a weird childhood

Don’t get me wrong, it was a great childhood

Being princess of the underworld and the daughter of the only sane people in all of Olympus had its perks

But compared to everyone else, it was weird

Hades was extremely protective of you because you were a mortal

Meaning that you could die

The thought of having to greet your soul when you died filled him with so much grief

So, he kept you sheltered, kept you safe

Never letting you lift a finger

As princess you had everything you ever needed and everything your heart desired

Since birth you had been trained by Athena and Aries under your father’s watchful eyes

When you were 16 and you finally wanted to see the rest of the world, you begged your parents to let you go to the mortal world

It took months of begging and when they said no, you’d get so upset that all the flowers in the underworld would wither

Persephone seeing how much you wanted to see the world

So, she convinces Hades to let you go

And he agrees but just as long as you promise to visit

You go to the human world and you’re so oblivious about human life that it’s concerning

Walking around in a floor length dress wondering why everyone else wasn’t dressed the same way

This is how you meet Diana Prince

She recognizes you immediately when you arrive at the Smithsonian, looking mildly confused

Your eyes light up when you see a familiar face

You stay with her for a couple of days before she decides that you’d be better off at the cave

That’s exactly what happens

Even though you whine a little and say you want to stay with her

She just knows it’s because you’re nervous about being in a new place

You know that if you were in any real danger your parents would inflict rage on the mortal world

Feeling mildly comforted at the idea

Diana doesn’t tell them to add you to the group

She just tells them that you need a place to stay and someone to help you find your way around

The first people you meet are Batman, Nightwing and Robin

Immediately being comforted just by looking at them

Batman reminded you of your dad and Nightwing of your mom

And Diana trusted them so you did too

You end up following Tim and Dick around for the next couple of days like a lost puppy

Dick finds it amusing

Tim is kinda unsettled but thinks you’re stupid for some reason

It isn’t until he actually talks to you, he realizes you’re much more profound than he gave you credit for

You don’t officially join the team

You just live there

Everyone thinks that you have no training whatsoever

And that you’re just a princess

Which you technically are but

Until you’re watching them train one day and then remember the days you would spar with Athena

It looked like so much fun

Immediately you wanted to join in

Some of them rolled their eyes and thought you were wasting their time

The others were happy to let you join in

They wanted to make Bart spar you but you looked around contemplatively before pointing at Tim

“If it is alright with you, I wish for you to be my partner.”

Tim blushing because what you said sounded like you were choosing him as a life partner, rather than sparring partner

Of course, Bart teases him for it as well as the others

When Tim walks up to the middle, Dick subtlety tells him to take it easy on you and he nods

The match is over before he can even make a move

You had the speed and strength of a god, it wasn’t a surprise

Not to you at least

To everyone else, kind of a huge surprise

Standing over him and giggling

“I want a rematch.”

“But of course.”

Spending the rest of the day sparring with him

He doesn’t beat you even once

And the others just watch you throw him around for an afternoon

After a while it stops being funny and Nightwing is almost concerned

It kind of hurts his pride but you still acknowledge him

“You know, for a human, you’re very skilled.”

“Uh, thank you?”

After that you go through the other members quite quickly

Some of them gave you a little trouble, like Conner

But you managed to be undefeated

They all think you should join the team after that and you agree

Spending more time with Tim that way

Always talking to him about your family’s history and stuff

Telling him all about your parents love story when he asked to hear about it

You talk so fondly of it and he’s honestly just kind of shocked that Greek Mythology isn’t mythology

I mean, he knew it was real because of Diana

But he never really understood how real these gods were

He falls for you

He loves the way your eyes light up and you smile at him

He loves the way you’re always eager to learn

He loves that you’re so kind and gentle but can also beat people up without even trying

He asks you out but it didn’t go as well as he was hoping

“Do you want to go out with me?”

“Yes, a walk sounds lovely.”

“(Y/N), I like you.”

“Aw that’s so sweet Tim, I like you too, friend.”

Everyone else starts enjoying the way he crashes and burns all the time

And Tim would stop asking usually

But he knows it in his bones that you like him too

But he has no other way to tell you aside from marching up to you and kissing you

Makes that Plan B tho

Plan A is getting you a bouquet of your favourite flowers and telling you that he likes you

Romantically

Not platonically

You grin widely and tell him you like him too

Kissing you just as the sun set that day

It’s one of your favourite memories

His too

Everyone being extremely happy and supporting of your relationship

You can tell Batman is trying to threaten you

But your father is god of the underworld and you have a three headed dog

So, when you and Tim are caught kissing in some hidden crevice in the cave by him and he tries telling you off, you can’t help you smile adorably

“Don’t worry Batman, I have no intention of dishonouring your son.”

Batman is like ???

And Tim is either like “Please don’t speak like we’re in the 1800s.”

or “Please dishonour me.”

He buys you pomegranates as a joke but then you prank him saying that if he eats them, he has to return to the underworld with you

Dick (Nightwing) approves

You like falling asleep in his arms so more often than not you plead with him to stay at the cave and sleep with you

He knows relationships in Olympus generally move a lot quicker so he ends up having to sit you down and explain everything to you so you know his boundaries

Totally accepting them and never going farther than he wants

You appreciate the small things

Like sitting in his lap and eating breakfast

Or being the small spoon

You become the team’s resident couple

Being part of a team, a family is honestly so much fun

Everyone thinking your invincible and practically indestructible

Until one day you’re hurt on the battlefield

Everyone freaking out and getting you back to the cave so you could be treated

The next morning, Tim goes to check up on you and finds something shocking

He’s not sure what to be more surprised by

Cerberus napping at the foot of your bed

Or you crying

Even though the giant, three-headed dog freaks him out, he still sits beside you and asks what’s wrong

“My father demands that I return home. He cannot stand the thought of me being hurt.”

His heart stops

He likes you so much, even bordering on love

And he doesn’t want you to leave

But who was he to stop the God of the Underworld?

Comforting you when you cried, hugging you tightly

“Shh it’s gonna be okay.”

You return home after that and it breaks Tim’s heart

You don’t officially break up but it’s kind of implied because you can never return back to the mortal world

Him being depressed for the next few months but he hides it well

Even though everyone knows how he’s feeling

Things aren’t any better on your end

Your heart aches with every second your away from him

Until one day it happens

Your soul wants to be with Tim

So, it tries to leave your body

You have a heart attack that night and nearly die and it horrifies Hades

He goes all the way to the mortal world to find Tim

Tim doesn’t quite understand how you could have a heart attack from missing him

But is still worried and agrees to go to the Underworld to see you

When he gets there, you’re in so much pain

But once he brings you into his arms you feel sated

When he kisses you, everything fades into a dull ache

Hades wants Tim to stay in the Underworld after that but you argue and tell him to go back to the land of the living

This wasn’t the place for him

“I’ll give up on you, I promise, but you can’t stay here any longer my love.”

“I don’t want to leave your side.”

“I’m sorry, but you know we can’t be.”

Tim goes the next morning and it breaks your heart but you know that it’s for the best

You spend the next few weeks in such sorrow that all of Persephone’s plants die

Hades and Persephone both see how much you love Tim and they are reminded of themselves when they were younger

Making a joint decision to let you go back to the mortal world

But you have to live a long life

That’s the one condition

You running into the cave and crashing into Tim’s arms

Kissing him there and feeling everything go right in the world

You fulfil your parents wish

And live a long, happy life by Tim’s side

Forever Taglist:

@simonsbluee

DC Taglist:

@emmacata

@p--e--a--c--h--e--s

@sometimeseverythingsucks

@sokkas-honour

@unstable1902

@lostgirlheart

[batarangsoundsdumb]

guess fucking what? my inbox is so fucking full right now i'm unloading all of this shit in one post.

For the 11th gotham memes: gothamites react to bruce being jacked in a tiktok he made with kids, like super yoked, ripped as hell

fucking hilarious thanks. i think i did it in one meme post, but i genuinely don't remember which one

i dunno which of the batfam would do this but one time i was sleeping over at a friends house and ended up on the floor bc the bed was so very small and i just stayed there because the rug was soft

that's a drunk jason move i don't know what to tell you

tim and jason are "i listen to pop punk" solidarity. whenever jason highjacks the batmobile theyll go on long ass car rides blaring mcr and paramore and then never talk about it again

as they should!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! tim: no jason it's my turn using the aux cord i gotta put on my jams jason: don't you dare put on weird shit tim: don't worry, you're gonna love this *plays fearless (taylor's version)

hear me out hear me out, red hood stans 🤝 nightwing stans t h i g h s

holy shit yes.

SNL au: Bruce breaks character when pretending to superman and says something like "I'm not superman! You've seen his gps!! It's from 2001!!!" @sabeanybabe

superman flies past the snl building the next day just to say 'actually it's from 2005, i'm not a heathen'

does your back hurt from carrying the batfam fandom

it hurts more from the exotic rock collection i keep in my backpack, but thanks for the concern.

I love your posts by why would you always leave the best parts in the tags?

as a treat for the people that check the tags ;) (and also because i'm committed to the short post aesthetic)

somehow your playlist was everything i never knew i needed. i mean it. this is my new favorite playlist.

and don't you dare get a new favourite playlist!

babe ur stoner tim playlist is exactly too perfect, earth is literally blessed by ur existence

babe thanks so much! i love my stoner tim playlist because it's just my usual playlist but people think it's an artistic choice that i put taylor swift and britney spears in there, when it's just what i unironically like listening to

JANDKSKDK BILLY RAY CYRUS ON THE STONER TIM PLAYLIST I LOVE IT IT

again it's not even an ironic choice, i know every single word and i genuinely like the song

The last chapter of Fundamentals of Casework has me crying at work. Thanks I love it @dudelookitsalesbian

oh babe, i'm sorry, but also, not sorry i love chapter 4 so much it's my lovechild with the 'mental illness' tag

soooo....stumbled on your tumblr by some stroke of fate??? read your DC fanfic first. which is PHENOMENAL btw. then found all the batmemes; the funniest thing EVER bc everyone forgets about regular old gothamites. kept scrolling and your blog pops up as recommended. clicked on the ao3 for shits and giggles and waddaya know?!?!? it's YOU!!! you're LEGEND!!!! ever seen that meme? it's a video of a cat that got into a baseball field and the two announcers get really invested in his escape attempt and start giving a play by play of the cat instead of the game. memeable moment: "GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!"

i seriously think about this ask every single day and it's so fucking funny to me that i've never seen the meme you're referencing, but i still find myself going 'GREAT stuff from the Cat!!!' whenever i see something funny. but wow i'm glad you liked this steaming pile of garbage

Fav dc character overall? And fav batfamily character?

don't ask me to pick between the loves of my life, but i can tell you i've cried about every single batfamily member and also wally west (my beloved)

What's your opinion on fans having a problem with batfam being "too big"? And some even claim that batfam is just "Bruce Alfred Dick Damian" and the rest of them are just "friends and allies" (source: reddit) Personally, I like batfam because of this reason but idk

stupid. a family can never be too big. i'm not that big a fan of like huge batfam stuff with everybody from every single universe, because as much as it's funny for bruce to have like 30 kids, it just feels a little too OOC for me.

This is the best tag I've seen involving the batfam, thanks for thinking of it

This is canon now @nctxrejects

lmao yeah i think at that point alfred has had to sit through like at least a dozen coming out talks and just has a pride flag collection in the attic that he pulls out whenever a kid comes out

idk why batfam hits different as compared to any other superhero family

bc it's found family and usually the other superhero families are almost all genetically related in one way or another

I don't know if you watch the umbrella academy but I saw your last post about batcest and saw the similarities. But the thing is (although I think it's weird) in TUA, they addressed it by saying "they were raised as weapons, not siblings" or something along those lines, which is simply not the case with batfam.

yeah i watched tua but i also thought it was ridiculous and they still treated each other as siblings so i didn't like the luthor/allison thing, and am glad they stopped doing that shit bc it fucking sucked.

Hot take: Batcest shippers are the same people who believe adopted siblings are not actual siblings

smoking hot take: batcest shippers are the people who watch 'my sister got stuck in the washing machine' porn

Duke was adopted by Bruce?

not technically no, but do i, tumblr user batarangsoundsdumb, look like i care?

True story but I had to change my freaking name because it used to be "Damien" and most people would go "OH LIKE DAMIAN WAYNE" like please I'm just tryna live

true story, but i don't actually think of damian when i hear the name damian, literally the first thing that pops up is damian darkh like bruh what?

apparently dc comics company supported comic stores by giving out new titles and stuff during the beginning of the pandemic to help them run and I just think that's wholesome

ah yeah that's so fucking cool, still don't like dc, the company, because this world is a capitalist hellhole and we're all owned by warner brothers or disney with no in between.

ayo looking at tumblr head canons and finding out bruce is actually a terrible father is a punch in the gut

lmao yes, in like 50% of comics bruce is a terrible father and it gives me whiplash

oooh I just saw the jason todd vs winter soldier post and the real question is: batman vs iron man

while iron man has like hundreds of cases of armor, batman could throw out an emp and have the guy dropping out of the sky in 2 seconds.

dickfast = fastdick = quickdick = quickie

magnum hot take

hey bata(?) just thought I'd let you know I have copied the obnoxious emoji and Billy Ray post for use on simping men going forth

thank you 😘🌷 (@spacebarsidecar)

why would you do that to your followers???? i get why i did it, but why would you???

what is scarecrow made the nightwing funko pop himself, like those diy-ers that paint over other ones

oh god no, horrible take, horrible take, that's a disgusting thought oh no

I see your HC that Bruce and Oliver fucked and raise you this: Dick and Roy ALSO fucked

yes they did and it was a horrible moment for jason to find out dick has fucked both of his best friends

"at this rate bruce adds like 1 child to his family every decade or so" Duke is introduced in 2013, Damian as Damian, not as an unnamed child, in 2006. And he is already 14 years old, Robins rarely remain Robins after 16 😬 It looks like a new Robin and Batkid will appear in a couple of years

i mean i can't wait? but somebody will probably die first tho, we're due for another major character death. my money's on either cass or duke this time.

BRO you're so right all of your Bruce's ex headcanons are amazing but they aren't ships, that's kinda wild. Like I don't want any peeks into how their relationship was I just want to see everyone make fun of them

lmao YES it's just i love bruce being a slut, like good for him.

I am in love with your posts your honour thank you

omg thanks are we like,, gonna kiss now?

The justice league needs to have a meeting to discuss how many of their members/partners have slept with bruce. Because through a combination of cannon & fannon (if DC wasn’t homophobic) we have AT LEAST: 1) clark 2) lois 3) oliver 4) dinah 5) john

Thats not counting villains or random civilians @dudelookitsalesbian

yes yes yes, they'll have a yearly meeting about how many of their collective exes could be out for revenge and batman's list just keeps getting longer.

tim was like "i'm drake now" and everyone was like ahh so your fursona is a dragon and tim was like pffffft no. ducks.

and what about it?

when steph's fighting livewire and she zaps her with lighting and nothing happens and then they both just. stand there awkwardly for a second and talk. yeah i couldn't stop laughing at that batgirl steph is the BEST

oh yeah that was fucking hilarious and i think it would be so cool and sexy of dc to give steph a little comic series,,, as a treat

Hi I absolutely adore all of yours "Bruce and Oliver very badly pretending they didn't fuck each other" memes

lmao i do too

I need you to know that “Bruce Wayne had frosted tips” is one of my favorite Bruce takes of all time it’s so galaxy brained. you’re right and you should say it

he also painted his hair blonde once when he was travelling and in conclusion, this is why he's being blackmailed by the gotham gazette.

you know my thing about gordon being branded as the only good cop in gotham is its a load of shit like arguably he's a good person and not working to screw people over or anything but the fact that he also works w. batman makes him a shit cop. like yea batman is better than the mob but its still illegal its still an abuse of power he just not making bank

babe, all cops are bad cops. (but yeah youre absolutely right, working with vigilantes makes you a shit cop, but also working against vigilantes just makes you an asshole cop yanno?)

ruh roh i think i’m about to add “so not yeehaw” every time i don’t like something

that's a very good vocabulary upgrade

somehow i feel like steph already knew. like babs obviously knew but i feel like bruce got high/drunk in front of steph and started telling his boarding school stories and steph was just like “oh you fucked up i’m never gonna forget this”

steph and bruce have weird uncle/rebellious niece dynamic and they just hang out sometimes and bruce will be like 'i once broke my arm when i tripped over a hedge when i was drunk so oliver drove me to the hospital on an electric scooter' and steph will just have to sit there with that knowledge in her head.

Hello I just wanted to tell you you are So right in all your steph opinions bc she is, in fact amazing and I think that's very sexy of you. Ps. Your Bruce/Oliver fic is hilarious

babe, thank you so much and yes steph is amazing and i love her and she deserves the world and she's the best member of the batfam hands down. also thanks

In Supersons we see a couple of kids that are implied to be Damian and Jon's children and the boy has laser eyes and can fly, so I asume he's not adopted. The girl, who calls Bruce grandpa, can also fly, btw. So it's canon (probably by accident) that Jon can have kids and he must have married one of Bruce's kids. (I'm hoping for Damian, mostly because any other of his children would be waaaaaaaaaaaaay too old.) @artemisa97

lmao that was probably an accident seeing as jon is a 17 year old superhero in the year 3000 (by the jonas brothers)

You know, I'm a die hard fan of your memes, but I gotta say one thing: if Gothamites actually took gas mask everywhere with them, then the Scarecrow would just be a weird dude in a weird costume, and not a villain oh so scary. DC really should just takes notes from you.

bold of you to assume there's no gothamite anti-maskers

How does it feel being the funniest person on this app?

horrible, next question.

I can't listen to Green Day or Billy Joel without thinking of your post about how Bruce got arrested at a Billy Joel concert @nightwings-kid

yeah that's your mistake, i on the other hand can't enjoy billy joel without thinking about the glee rendition of 'uptown girl'

I've FINALLY been watching the Batman animated series and I gotta say, after watching "the gray ghost" I am CONVINCED that Batman is a closeted super hero geek who was 100% freaking out the first time he met Superman and is just REALLY good at hiding it.

superman: so what do you do in your free time? batman, thinking about the superman fanfiction he's writing on the batcomputer: i have no free time

bruce and oliver be like boyfriends to co-workers 401k (do the justice leagues get 401ks??? not that bruce and ollie would need them, but-)

lmao yes just 400 thousand words of bruce realising 'oh dip oliver is such a fucking dumbass' (also i don't know what a 401 k is but i assume they don't?)

Gothamites would totally boo superman as he saves Gotham while batman is out. @meenje

he's like 'okay think about that next time you want to be saved from an alien octopus'

I just took long break from dc comics and I come back to see ric grayson ??

i think it's very cool and sexy of dc to see dick and just think 'you know what? let's just give him a traumatic brain injury' and then didn't develop his character in any real way

SPEAKING OF RIC GRAYSON, gothamites making confused memes out of ric grayson is much needed

'dick grayson is my taxi driver? can anyone explain what the fuck happened he looks like an italian plumber?'

i hate to say it but batfam are def "marvel characters" in that sense they are characters who are human but become superheroes unlike most dc characters who are gods trying to be human maybe this is why I like batfam

fair enough

[beautifulterriblequeen]

B2:S - Chapter 5

Much of this series will be about the differences and additions in the novel version, and how they contribute to my understanding of story canon. But there will be character appreciation, the odd theory and headcanon, and suchlike as well.

Here be lots of Viren deets, Best Boy Soren deets, some writing/continuity stuff, worldbuilding appreciation and half of a theory, Detective Rayla, Moon Temple geeking, Claudium and dark magic, and more!

Spoilers for Book Two: Sky below.

(I know for darn sure that I wrote up a post for chapter 4, but I can't find it anywhere so I guess Tumblr ate it and I'll have to redo it at some point, but today is not that day)

Viren, my evil dude, my bad guy, coming in clutch with the worldbuilding and backstory again! If you want to know decades of information, you gotta talk to Viren. Or read his scenes, at least. Here, he seems to not sleep much when he has a big problem to analyze his way through. Solutions trump pretty much everything else in this guy's life, and he's had a really hard week with a lot of new and complicated problems. Of course he's getting sleep-deprived trying to find his way through them all.

Harrow put so much trust in Viren when he made him High Mage! He just threw himself extra hard at that Lady Justice blindfold, didn't he? Didn't really want to see what Viren was doing in his magic study, so he left Viren to his devices. And Viren has a lot of devices.

Also, this is fascinating: Viren made the secret passage to his "less official study" in Katolis Castle! And he was inspired to do so by the way his own mentor kept the Puzzle House. What else could a Puzzle House be, except a place with secret passages? Yay! secret headcanon that "the Puzzle House" is just "Katolis Castle" from Kid Viren's perspective tho

So either Viren built all of those passageways, or at least the ones to his dungeon. Which means he has to have, or know where to get, a stash of those glowing blue Moonshadow crystals. Hmmm.

I can't wait to learn more about Kpp'Ar and young Viren, btw. From this description of Viren and all his literal secret ways, it feels like another parallel between Viren and Runaan, with the whole "secretive paths, members only, insider knowledge" type stuff. Only the really cool members of this cult club get to know the secrets, and guess what, kid, you're cool now but you can never tell anyone, okay? Our secret.

Yeahhh, that'll never backfire in any way for either of them.

Kpp'Ar calling puzzles and secrets "man-made magic," though. Yes sir, knowledge is indeed power.

This chapter mentions Runaan by name, from Viren's perspective. Generally that would imply that Viren knows his name, even though assassins do not share their names, and Runaan didn't seem to give his to Viren in the first book. However, there was a scene in book one where the last paragraph switched perspective from Viren to Runaan - a technique that's very common in visual media like movies and shows and gives you that "ohoho they left the room and didn't notice this, but you do!" vibe. Using Runaan's name there in book one, where Viren couldn't see it but readers could, helps them keep track of the assassin's story arc while maintaining Viren's racism.

So in book two, in which Runaan has no onscreen scenes (alas), using his name in a scene that calls back to the events in book one helps us remember what happened in that dungeon cell. It would be a bit muddier to recall the specifics if Viren kept thinking about Runaan as "Elf." So I'm cool with the perspective nudge because it serves a narrative purpose: clarity. But I'm also enjoying the angst of considering that, somehow, Viren learned Runaan's name either during or after the coining spell. Mwa ha ha haaa. (Obligatory "Keep my pretty name outta your mouth" goes here)

Okay, back to Viren's scheming! He took the mirror because it was human-sized in a dragon lair. He knew it didn't really fit there, and that made it interesting, so he stole it. But he realized it was really powerful when Runaan wouldn't tell him squat about it - the assassin's instinct to protect Xadian secrets from human hands meant that Viren was holding a very powerful Xadian secret. And that just made him want it all the more. Ah, Runaan, if only your relationship with lying was, like, the exact opposite of what it is. Nyx could've spun Viren a believable tale in 2 minutes flat.

Also of interest: Viren considers his cursed coins to be a final fate. He expects Runaan to remain in his coin forever. With the Chekhov's coins still extant in the storyline, we can assume that they'll come up again eventually, but Viren has no current plans to do anything with his elf money except carry it around.

It's worth noting that Viren admits that he got impatient when he trapped Runaan in the coin. Runaan's first fate in Katolis was supposed to be death at Soren's hands, but Claudia "saved" him from that. His next fate was to become spell components, but Viren's frustration with his stubbornness "saved" him from that fate, too. So now he's in a coin, where no one can chop him up at all. Yay? No, boo!

We get one last line about Runaan before Viren shifts gears: he makes a point of noting for us that Runaan's shackles are still locked shut. However much of Runaan made it into that coin - body, soul, hair care products - he was magicked there, pulled right out of his restraints.

The creepy black liquid that Viren pours right into his eyes is the last of a powerful potion he got from Kpp'Ar, and its recipe is ancient! Humans used it back in the age of Elarion to see through the illusions of the world. And we get a delightfully creepy bit of description about the preparation of this serum, which makes it abundantly clear that it's a Moon magic-based concoction, harvested from eyeless vipers on a moonless night, with the threat of irrevocable madness ("madness" by whose definition, though) if it's done wrong-

Hang on. Hold up. This is a Plato's Cave reference. OH MY GOD.

No no I'm fine, this is brilliant. Sorry, sorry, I couldn't figure why there was so much description for a potion prep that Viren didn't even have to perform himself. But now I get it. I see the light. HA. I should make a separate post for this, it's amazing.

Anyway, for reference, the humans who used this serum were called the Oracles of Ophidia, and Ophidia is a taxonomy group that includes all modern snakes. Can you say "creepy ancient snake rites"? I can! Woo!

Viren activates the serum with a spell, but apparently he's never done it before. He's not sure if it's supposed to be hot and bubbly, and he worries that it's been tainted by moonlight.

Oh, I do hope so.

The magic potion hurts, a lot. Viren will do just about anything, to himself or anyone, to do what he believes is necessary. He just risked madness and blindness to find out what this mirror does! Viren. Can you just. Take a nap or something. Have a Snickers.

This chapter gives us a fun clue that I don't remember from the show: when Viren's vision clears and he can see, his reflection has white pupils and the room reflected in the mirror has inverted colors. You know where else has inverted colors?

You know who else got white pupils for a hot second?

Okay, now it makes sense! Viren and Lujanne were both seeing into the realm beyond life and death. Him with his moon magic potion, and her with her moon powers on a full moon night at the Moon Nexus. Which is Very Interesting! Is it a direct hint about Aaravos's location, or just a separate cool detail? Orrr, does it look like a direct hint because Aaravos is actually trapped in the world beyond life and death, but it's actually separate and we'll see something about white pupils again later on?

Viren really does have self-esteem issues, we all picked up on it with his rant at his reflection. He throws a fit when he catches himself wondering if he's actually worthless. In the book version of his tantrum, he shoves the mirror and hurls a candelabra instead of flipping a table. He didn't need to shove the mirror to set the fire, but it's in here. Foreshadowing that perhaps, if push comes to shove, Viren will choose himself over Aaravos? Giving Aaravos time to peek through and see that the coast is clear?

Soren, my boyyyyy. He has a rough night at the Moon Nexus because two sides of him are fighting with each other. He struggles to understand Callum's friendship with Rayla, and he also fantasizes about chopping off Rayla's head. One of these is a pretty ordinary thing to do. The other is Soren's internalization of what he needs to do to gain his father's approval. If he brought his dad a chopped off elf head every week, he'd probably feel a lot more confident because Viren would praise him a lot more.

Okay, okay, omg, is it just me, or does the "Moonshadow Madness" story, as it's told in the book, seem like Soren just doesn't know what a monsterfucker is? He thinks an elf bite puts humans under a spell. But vampires are sexy, and some people want them to do more to them than just bite them. A passionate kiss under the moonlight could look very bitey, especially if one of the participants has horns and you're already culturally trained to hate them. No yeah, I'm already headcanoning an actual human-elf kiss that got misunderstood by an observer long ago.

it's Lujanne isn't it, we all know, because what is a love spell but a sweet soft illusion, I mean how else does she get supplies for her Caldera, I ask you, and also Corvus was totally sent to investigate once and he told Soren at camp what he saw

And then back to magefam angst: Soren pretending that his sister's nose-tapping is stupid, even though he actually thinks it's cool, just because their dad thinks it's stupid. Viren, istg. Let your kids like harmless things. It's so cute that Soren taps his nose back at her, though! Like they have their own sibling code. I hope we get to see the nose tap again, especially now that they've chosen different sides. It could mean so much, that they're not too far apart yet.

Rayla knows what buttery pancakes smell like. I love this. Do Moonshadow elves have butter and pancakes, does Rayla eat a stack of eight giant pancakes in the morning? Orrrr it is just illusion food? I don't care, let Rayla have pancakes! Everyone loves pancakes. Pancakes will save the world. this message brought to you by the fact that I can't eat pancakes rn, send help

I love that Rayla is both sus of the pancakes and hungry, and that combines into a very motivated "I will get to the bottom of this" attitude. She kind of goes into Poirot Mode when she inserts herself into Soren and Ellis's conversation about Ava, explaining about the wolf's illusion leg and segueing into her claim that the pancakes taste sus. Claudia confirms she used dark magic, and Rayla is furious. It's different than the show's version in that it puts Rayla in detective mode, as the only Moonshadow elf in the scene, and boy does she take that role seriously. Also, she doesn't actually swallow the dark magic pancake bite. It ends up on the ground just like Lujanne's grubs from that earlier meal. These poor kids are so nutrient-starved. You guys gotta eat!!

Rayla's determination and prejudices and the fact that she super knows Harrow is dead all dovetail to make her try repeatedly to persuade Callum that Soren and Claudia are Not To Be Trusted. It's nice that the book keeps taking the time to point out that Rayla is Well Intentioned But Flawed, just like Callum and pretty much every other character in the show. No one is Right All The Time, no one Knows More Than Everyone Else.

Callum loving the sound of Claudia's unique voice is so wholesome. When you like someone, it only makes sense that you like all the things about them that they can't change - like the sound of Claudia's voice. Her choices with dark magic, not so much!

Claudia seems to have the same concerns Soren does about Callum's relationship with Rayla, but she comes out and asks him. The inherent possession implied in "your elf" is interesting, though. Elves are not people to Claudia. They're enemies who can be disassembled for the magic inside them. So maybe more like robots than living beings, if she knew what a robot was. Maybe she heard Soren's "Moonshadow Madness" story and realized he totally missed the kissing implications - but she didn't, and now she's genuinely worried that Rayla could kiss Callum under a full moon and enchant him to do her will. Good thing it's only a half moon, then!

Okay, Callum nervously making a puppet hand and then not knowing what to do with his hands and freaking out about itching and moving and pointy elbows is such a ND mood. The sudden stress of knowing that someone else is noticing your existence and maybe you're Not Existing Right, amirite? Ugh, poor Callum.

The Moon Temple! Omg it's so pretty in the description! Made to be beautiful and useful, full of knowledge but also allowing light and life inside (butterflies and vines). Lujanne, when can I move in, please? Also, it's all the more angsty because Lujanne is the only one who gets to see this beautiful place, but it has lots of chairs and shelves and tables, and it was meant to be used by lots of people. :(((

Claudia knows some of the runes on the walls. She isn't in a hurry to copy the rest of them down or anything, either. Her spellwriting is very precise, and she's a skilled mage. Her father would have made sure she was aware of the dangers of drawing sloppy runes, as much as he made her aware of the dangers of doing dark magic wrong. And the whole point of dark magic is that it's easier to learn than primal magic. Claudia supports her dad and their shared knowledge and life path. She's not gonna go nuts over an elf library she can't translate.

Side note: Between Claudia knowing some Moon runes and Viren building a secret passageway and a dungeon and lighting it with the same blue crystals that Lujanne and Ethari use for light--and Claudia exclaiming that she loves ruins--I wonder once more if there are really Moonshadow ruins somewhere in Katolis, which Viren has found and looted. Father-daughter relic hunting trip, maybe while Soren is away at camp? Omgsh that would be so wild!

Callum out here having a Viren moment with his "I feel powerless unless I've got magic that lets me help" vibes. God. I love their complicated mirroring. One of the hard differences between them is that Callum is very sure dark magic is bad because you have to kill stuff and take its power to cast spells, and he doesn't want to be a person who kills and takes like that. The line he walks to be nice to Claudia on their tour of the Cursed Caldera because he likes her, while telling her that he doesn't want to do her magic, like, ever, is so fine that it might as well be a shifting shadow on the ground. It's a very fitting conversation to be having during the half moon, with its tricks and little white lies.

Callum being out of the castle and his comfort zone, having to deal with the fact that the Claudia he loves is not quite the Claudia who's chasing him down across the kingdom, but of the two of them, he's the only one with a problem with this.

They say that if you really want to get to know someone, you should spend time with them outside their comfort zone - in heavy traffic, with a small baby, taking care of a new pet, trying a new skill, following unfamiliar directions, etc. While the castle is familiar territory for them both, Callum's never really found his comfort zone yet, while Claudia is pretty comfortable with her growing skill set. The creepy part starts to kick in when Callum begins to realize that Claudia's comfort zone encompasses a whole bunch of stuff that seems like it should make her uncomfortable... but it doesn't. But that'll be for a future chapter!

[gebtoons]

my contribution to the bapo timeline discourse bc i’m just gonna propose a timeline and will not be taking criticism <3 (under the cut bc this is gonna be a long post probably) 

ok disclaimer I am quite stupid, however I’m gonna use my knowledge from my own 12 years in american public high school and what little info I have about american boarding schools/catholic schools that I have from my friends lol. so. idk. 

i’m also gonna date songs/major events and i’m gonna be taking some “just trust me bro” liberties bc y’all are right it does NOT make that much sense. 

January 6: Epiphany; this is like an actual holiday lol. like its always on the sixth. idk its good that this is the starting point bc its an actual date yknow? For the purposes of this timeline were going with that its early in the week, so lets go with Monday idk

January 6-13: You and I, Role of a Lifetime; so we’re all kinda in agreement that this timeline (at least the beginning) only really makes sense if you and i/role of a lifetime aren’t like. a singular moment and are instead multiple days. so yeah, of this first week, this is like. monday-next sunday ish yknow. 

January 14: Auditions, Plain Jane Fatass; ok so having auditions for a spring musical right after kids get back from break actually makes perfect sense to me, like i can see it being like “ok take break to prepare so as soon as you come back we can have auditions so we can jump right into rehersals” yknow? and since the rave is clearly on a friday (”we’ll meet in tanya’s room on friday night”) so i’m going with the monday before.  

as for pjf, i know it doesn’t make a ton of sense for them to get a two week late birthday package their first few weeks back from school, but hear me out it makes sense. the implication throughout this entire show is that the twins have decently shitty parents. from bits of dialogue (in this song in particular lol) i’m kinda inferring their the “only concerned with how their kids make them look to others” kind of neglectful. so I don’t think it’s too outside the realm of possibility that they went away for the holidays, didn’t bring the twins, and instead mailed them a birthday package and having it show up two weeks late. realistically the timing of this isnt that important and the explicit “two week” time frame could’ve been an exaggeration on nadia’s part to mock her shit parents (idk its in her character) basically ppl are a little two fixated on this imo but anyway. moving on. 

January 18: Wonderland, A Quiet Night At Home, Rolling, Best Kept Secret; a very agreed upon point in the timeline. its the friday following the auditions. moving on. 

January 21: Confession; also very agreed upon. the monday following the rave. moving on again 

January 23: Portrait of a Girl; the date here is kinda arbitrary, but bc sister chantelle says “ok lets try to put yesterday’s rehearsal behind us” and i for the life of me cannot think of a scene she could be referring to (there’s none in the script either) that implies it wasn’t the same monday as confession (bc even in a boarding school i think holding extracurriculars that aren’t sports over the weekend (especially when they are no where near crunch time lol) is weird and not common) so i just picked a random day during the week

January 25: Birthday Bitch!, One Kiss, Are You There?; from matt’s line in wonderland, ivy’s birthday is a week after the rave. in my timeline that’s january 25th (an aquarius queen). 

btw given all grown up’s “17, how will i manage?” ivy is 16 during 17 at her party, which is strange given shes a high school senior and seniors are typically 17 during 18. so either a) she skipped a grade, not an unheard of thing. or b) shes not a senior, shes just a junior who hangs out with a bunch of seniors, which is also pretty common. and looking through the script i can’t find any mention that she is also a senior, other than yknow she graduates with them, but she isn’t mentioned during the class ranking scene? so idk not that it really matters just a fun detail 

February 3 (at night): 911 Emergency!; ok controversial. i know i like the joke about how its funny that peter having a weird dream when he was high prompted him to want to come out and really ruined his relationship with jason. BUT. i think the dream (despite it’s weirdness) would have a lot more meaning if it wasn’t the result of being really high, but if it was a dream he had like a week later as a result of a building sense of guilt/anxiety bc he told matt. also it fits better given later timeline things. (this timeline literally only exists if there are weird jumps in time that don’t make a ton of sense) (EDIT: I forgot one line about Jason crashing at ivys but fuck it forget that bitchass line this makes for more drama its staying this way)

February 4: Reputation Stain’d, Ever After; the next day following peter’s dream, idk what else to say, moving on. 

February 25-28: Spring; another jump! i’m sorry but the only way for this to make sense logistically is for there to be quite a few time jumps! however, i also think this one works bc i think it gives time for everything from around ivy’s party and peter and jason’s break up to stew emotionally. like obviously a musical only has so much time to tell a story so the audience cannot see every realistic beat, but honestly i think it makes the whole thing a little more dramatic™ if there’s space for everything to settle, and for ivy to come and apologize and such. also, the reason it’s multiple days is bc in the script, ivy is trying to study (presumably for some sort of midterm) while nadia is playing, so that probably takes place a few days before they move out, so before finals. but in the script, jason and peter are packing and peter is leaving, so that part of the song/staging takes place on the 28th. yes, that’s weird, but we are clearly thinking more about the logistics of this school than the writers were so. 

March 1: One; assuming st. cecilia’s works kinda like boarding schools here, they probably do staggered move out/move in, just bc that would be a lot to have people coming and going at once so it makes sense that peter left the day before, while jason and ivy are leaving the next day. also, given that peter is trying to call jason while he and ivy are banging, it’s probably been a hot minute since the actual break up, since peter was clearly very hurt by the whole thing, it would make sense (at least to me) that peter would reach out a month ish later, rather than like a few days later (you have to make so many assumptions to make this timeline work granted they aren’t super out there assumptions but still this is annoying) 

March 1-25: Spring Break. the coworkers I have who are in boarding school work over their school breaks, which are longer than the public school breaks (which are only a week) so i put their spring break at 3 weeks. it makes sense, and it makes the later part of the timeline make sense. 

I know i’m already halfway through this, but to me it makes sense for their to be quite a few time jumps in the story bc its a musical. they cannot show every day. there are a lot of other shows (particularly shows set in high schools) that are set over a whole school year, but if you just look at the events of the story that doesn’t make sense, so you have to imply that obviously they are not showing every little detail. moving on. 

March 25: Wedding Bells, In The Hallway, Touch My Soul; peter wakes up from his nightmare in the church, so im assuming he fell asleep in church (like he almost did during epiphany). also it makes sense that class ranks are announced in late march-early april, I know my school announced ours in like, the first week or so of april? so yeah. moving on.

(from this point on i was giving myself a headache trying to make it make sense so its all weird from here!!)

April 4: See Me, Warning; the date doesn’t really matter here, I picked a random day in early april. the script said peter is calling from him and jason’s old dorm room, as he was picking up the last of his things, so he clearly made the roommate switch after school started (makes sense to me). 

April 15-20 (approximately): Ivy finds out she’s pregnant. look google tells me on average people find out they are pregnant around 5-7 weeks after conception. i went with around 7 just so this timeline makes a tiny bit more sense given the later stuff, so yeah here we go. 

May 4: Pilgrim’s Hands, God Don’t Make No Trash, All Grown Up, Promise, Once Upon A Time, Cross; a rough night for our heroes. so given sister chantelle saying “again? wonderful.” and nadia saying “i can’t believe you missed rehearsal again”, clearly ivy has been missing quite a few rehearsals, so for dramas sake maybe from when she found out she was pregnant? also i know i’ve been saying they wouldn’t have rehearsals on weekends, and given my weird timeline this would be a saturday, but its tech week so i’ll allow it. 

May 5: Two Households, Bare, Queen Mab, A Glooming Peace; pretty self explanatory, and it makes sense to have the spring play in early may. rip jason. 

May 11: Absolution; the day before graduation peter goes to confront the priest. gives him a small amount of time to start processing, and it makes sense it would be the night before, at least to me. 

May 12: No Voice; i fucking hate this. “peter, we graduate next sunday” i hate that stupid fucking line. do you know that this timeline literally would be fine if it weren’t for that stupid fucking line? bc then, the school play would be in early may and graduation could be in late may-early june (when most high schools hold graduation) but no. keeping with continuity, they have to graduate the sunday following the school play. “peter we graduate in a month, are you really never gonna talk to me again?” would have been fine. but no, now we have beef. literally everything else about the end of this timeline being kinda weird would work itself out, except for the fucking graduation. god damn. anyway, may 12th, the graduate on may 12th which is really fucking weird bc of that one fucking line. whatever. i didn’t write the damn thing bc if i did i wouldn’t have written that fucking line. (i’ve been at this for over an hour and a half, so i’m a tad annoyed, can you tell?) 

anyway, that’s it. that’s my long as hell proposed bare timeline. if there’s anything glaringly wrong with it i don’t care bc this timeline literally cannot make sense. but honestly, now that i think about the Popular Tween High Schooler Musicals (heathers, bmc, deh) the timelines of those (especially heathers and bmc) don’t make tons of sense either. that’s just the way it is, that’s the way its gonna be. and we have to live with it. 

this post is so long it is actually slowing down my laptop as i type it

[tundrainafrica]

I just find it so unfortunate that some aggressive shippers ruin a ship and a character for so many people. A popular Erwin x Levi artist got hate comments by some Levihan shippers and so many people are bashing it now on twitter because of that. Its just so sad considering LH was one of the most beautiful and fun dynamics in such a depressing story. Even Hange is getting hated because LH is pretty much the default ship involving them and it just breaks my heart :(

Twitter has some great content and I actually hang around AOT twt for some quick content. It’s like every time I’m feeling fast food I just hang there, like a few tweets, read a few soc med AUs etc etc. 

But god. It’s a mess man. Last year I was constantly on twitter to be honest and it left me in a bad mood everyday because people are just being assholes for little to no reason really but just to put themselves in what they believe is a morally higher ground from their peers. And people just like fighting and the funny part is no opinions are actually heard, no views are actually exchanged. It’s just “you dont agree with me so you’re a bad person.” 

Ad hominem attacks are just everywhere.

So I like staying in my small little hole and just talking to myself there and just liking the content of the Levihan people I actually follow. I see stuff I don’t agree with but I’ve kinda accepted that a lot of people there are just there to push an agenda because really if people were that open minded, I don’t think lynching and call out culture would have gotten this far.  

I’ve used this same analogy so many times but I feel like in Twitter, people are just scrambling for some sort of moral high ground. Because of that, it is completely useless to engage in discourse there because one thing I noticed is most people who are vocal there already have a set stance on something and the fact that they’re ready to just bully anyone who stands in the way of their agenda, just makes convincing them out of the agenda impossible and a complete waste of time. And there are two issues in particular among the LH community which are really unsettling for me: the ship wars and within the LH community, the gender war. 

Ship wars

I find the ship wars unnecessary because really what makes a superior ship? 

Probability of being canon? How much fuel they were given in canon? Healthiness of the relationship?

The truth is people ship for many reasons. But really, who are we to judge how a person goes about the way they decide to participate in the fandom and ship? As long as it is something they keep within personal spaces and do it responsibly, I don’t think it’s our business to judge someone or lynch them. The important thing is people are able to not be an asshole about it. People can ship the most questionable shit, create the most dubious content, as long as that person is respecting boundaries and putting the right tags and trigger warnings, who are we to call them out right?

Of course I prefer LH over other Levi ships personally but is there really a need to attack other people’s ships about it? I probably do poke fun at Ereri because until now I still do not get why people enjoy Ereri in the first place but why destroy the fandom experience for people just because we don’t agree with them.

My general intention behind shipping Levihan is because above anything I value the healthiness in the relationship and the things people can learn about love and relationships by analyzing Levihan’s dynamics and headcanoning them. I love Levi and Hange’s dynamics to death and I like digging deeper into them and pulling out lessons from it about love, life and relationships and just sharing them with people which is my whole point for participating in this fandom in the first place. 

But in the end, ships are just preferences. Some people like getting a kick out of dubious pairings and toxic relationships. As long as they consume these responsibly and don’t emulate them in real life, I see no problem in it. 

The toxic ones are the ones who actively crucify people for preferences. 

The Gender War

One really disturbing thing I found about twitter is that deciding to use ‘she’ to refer to Hange can get you lynched. I found a few accounts that would reblog tweets where someone says something like “Yes, Hange, Queen” which gets retweeted by some NB Hange folk who say stuff like “Unfollow this transphobe now.” 

Because apparently deciding to headcanon Hange as a woman or just preferring to use ‘she’ makes people a transphobe. Which is personally just... really disturbing. I don’t believe words like homophobic, transphobic, racist should be so easily thrown around unless there is hard evidence to believe that someone is really one of the epithets above like for example: 

There are things I find completely assholish like of course, refusing to use someone’s preferred pronouns if they ask you. 

But Hange is fictional and Hange is a gift to the fandom.And I don’t even think the issue about Hange’s gender should have ever reached this far. The only thing Yams ever said was that Hange is just not the type to be tied down to a single gender. 

And policing Hange’s gender and saying NOPE SHE’S NON BINARY USE THEY Is just counterintuitive to the whole idea that she’s a free spirit. In the end, Hange as a character wouldn’t have given a fuck whether people called her a they, she or even a he. 

And yeah, it’s frustrating really that these two issues I just discussed above are ruining Hange as a character for a lot of people and consequently, ruining Levi x Hange as a ship. 

Apparently, a lot of people are closet LxH shippers or closet Hange stans because the moment they tweet something about Hange, there are people who will attack them. If people refer to Hange as they, they get attacked. If people refer to Hange as she, they get attacked. There are so many antis apparently to the LxH ship, some apparently are jealous because ‘it’s the closest to canon’ while others just apparently deem it a toxic ship because of our own internal gender war.  

There’s no winning really. And to be honest, there’s nothing I can do either and I don’t want to engage in any arguments in twitter if at the end of it, I’m just gonna end up wasting my time listening to ad hominem attacks directed at me just for not agreeing with someone in a fandom related matter. . 

I’ve said my piece about the Hange gender issue so many times. There are NBs who use she. There are those who use they. Being female and being NB aren’t mutually exclusive. You can be both at the same time.

But yeah, we still have people being assholes about this and pushing factually wrong agendas. I love research and I have been writing research papers and metas for a lot of things even before I started this blog in the first place. And I eventually learned that the world is so complex that no opinion is completely and absolutely correct. 

And ideally, opinions shouldn’t be made so easily. 

Don’t get me wrong. I believe everyone is entitled to a preference and when I say preference I mean the type of food they like, the type of wallpaper they like. 

But no one is entitled to a moral judgement or opinion just for existing and when I say opinion I mean questions on morals, on what’s right or what isn’t, what is or what should be. Every single person has the responsibility to research, hear both sides of a discourse and understanding them before deciding for themselves what’s right. And this is why hearing accusations that someone is ‘transphobic,’ ‘homophobic’ blah blah over how we hc a character just really does not sit well with me. 

Passing moral judgement on someone requires discernment, deep thought and lots and lots of evidence. But yeah this is a philosophical question and a political question so I ain’t going to delve into it here.

Because, in the end, fandoms are preferences. The way we choose to participate in a fandom and create content are preferences more than anything.

So what? (Btw, if you reached all the way here, thank you for listening to me ramble lol and sorry if you weren’t expecting this type of ramble)

I know I’ve just been rambling a lot up there for a lot of reasons but really what message do I wanna give? 

Fandoms are preferences more than anything so I don’t even believe that there should be a discussion on moral judgement here. People can have the weirdest kinks, the most questionable preferences but as long as they aren’t going around romanticizing abuse, beating up people in real life, killing them and lying in real life, who are we to judge?

Even if someone says they have a rape kink and abuse kink when it comes to fics, as long as they acknowledge it’s something they shouldn’t emulate in real life, as long as they can keep an adult conversation about it, I think these people are generally kinder and more pleasant overall than people who force their healthy canon ship and lynch everyone for having more questionable preferences. 

Ship and let ship. Live and let live. Headcanon and let headcanon. If a person has a differing opinion, listen. (Or really, if you just don’t want to deal with listening to differing opinions coz you’re just gonna get stressed, don’t lynch? Don’t send hate? And just ignore it?)

Ask yourself. Does the person acknowledge that it isn’t right in real life? Do they acknowledge if they emulate it in real life it has the potential to be harmful?

Honestly, all I wanna do is just let people stan Levi and Hange however they want to. There are obviously hcs I dont agree with. But in the LH community we just all love Levihan, let’s not ruin the fandom experience for anyone. In the AOT community, we all just love AOT, let’s not ruin it for anyone. Let’s not hurt anyone, attack them etc. 

If someone doesn’t agree and they can hold an adult conversation about it and they don’t emulate these toxic opinions in real life and they recognize that there is the option to just agree to disagree, why don’t we just listen and engage in this discourse to learn more about other people and to build more perspectives?

Because really it isn’t the questionable hcs or the multiple genders which leaves such a bad taste in my mouth. It’s the people who just go straight to attacking instead of actually considering that there’s potential for discourse and there’s potential to ‘agree to disagree’ because in the end, fandom discourse is a question of preference more than moral judgement. 

It’s easier said than done really. But personally for me, I just try to keep my fandom experience as non toxic as possible while at the same time as mentally fulfilling as possible. I enjoy discourse, I like hearing differing opinions and I really believe with something as light and as inconsequential as fandoms as our common ground, we can learn to peacefully co-exist despite differing opinions on what the best ship is or what Hange’s gender is. 

Note: I won’t delve too much on the Hange gender issue here because I have pending asks about those which I’ll answer in one go, but I really believe that both they and she are valid pronouns for Hange. 

I have a general preference for ‘she’ because it’s just easier to read. But personally I don’t think too much about the gender identity issue because it’s really just too complex for me and i like spending my time thinking of other headcanons about Hange than gender and people who push the Hange is nb agenda and people who push the Hange is a female agenda and just insult each other and lynch each other are both equally unsettling. 

[norgestan]

norandro, eva/nora, amiris 👀❣️

NORANDRO:

i mean, starting off pretty strong with my favorite eskam couple. oh god. THEM. as someone who cannot stomach season 2 and also skipped william's clip and william's clip only when season 4 of skam came to an end... i will ALWAYS love what eskam did for this couple. i think i explain it pretty well on my season 3 review, but to sum up those thoughts: i think this is what noorhelm was truly supposed to be, they're both pretty flawed characters with great arcs who make their get-together super interesting and organic, alejandro is my baby and the most developed william and i'll die on this hill, etc.

especially i think that norandro, for a ship that got way less screentime that all their other counterparts, is by FAR the most developed couple in all of them and up there in eskam too, and although they weren't the focus of most of the show, it's clear as day that the writers really tried to tell a compelling story with these two - and they succeeded. it's shocking to me that eskam actually got to link the "everyone is fighting a battle" motto that has become a meme for how poorly incorporated it is on the skamverse, as alejandro effectively behaved around that motto: during season 3 and onwards, which is where i believe he's fully reformed as a character and love interest, he never hurts nora - nor anyone - in any way. he struggles to tell nora how he doesn't want a relationship because he doesn't want to hurt her, and in the miscommunication fest that their first clip of s3 is, i've always LOVED that nora calls alejandro a "fuckboy" still, and he's clearly annoyed by this, but doesn't bite back. he's always so mindful of her feelings even though he's struggling himself, BECAUSE he understands that his suffering is not the center of the world! because treating people with kindness is a strength in itself! and it continues like that for the rest of the season. like, at his most petty, he just sends a text to nora calling her a "fuckboy", which is honestly hilarious. he deals with a lot of jealousy because of nora's new relationship, yet he values her friendship so much that he never snaps at her, he never lets it show when he's talking to her, and he's never passive-aggressive about it - you can tell that he's so genuinely glad that they're still friends after all. god, the clip where he realizes that miquel is a shit boyfriend while he's talking to nora... imagine the things any other william would've said there. imagine the ways alejandro could've been petty or overprotective and fuck everything up. instead, he recognizes nora needs space and even though it hurts to be away from her, he does it because he understands it's what she needs - and his own feelings and entitlement (that he previously showed, too!) aren't the most important thing. it's beautiful. UGH. what a great character eskam crafted, there.

i like them well enough in s4, too. i think, for what they had to work with, they took them in a good direction and their happy ending feels deserved. it's just that... personally, i wish there was more introspection of nora's aftermath in s3, which is also one of my complaints with season 3 - and where characters like emma could've been SO good. although i understand the intentions, a lot of nora's internal turmoil regarding her abusive relationship with miquel are only tied to her desire to be with alejandro. it's frustrating that it became so boy-focused when the girl squad was the center of the emotional climax of nora's season. to me, the solution is still in giving the pov's to the girl squad and not... random characters lol, but oh well. i think eskam did good there and i still love this couple the most!!! i just wish there was an universe where their story doesn't have to be wrapped up in one season and we can get actual glimpses of a beautiful slow burn where they can finally get together and make their relationship work - and this is where the fanfic part comes in, i guess! as someone who loves the couple, i liked seeing them lovey-dovey in the background of s4, but also i wouldn't have been too mad if they held off from making them completely canon and only hinted their status as endgame, kinda how they did with eva and jorge. oh, and speaking of eva, i guess...

NOREVA:

i guess, the main thing with them is that i love norandro so much that i can't really see nora with any other love interest??????? now, platonically. UGH. 12/10. anyone who's seen season 3 should know and i shouldn't even have to explain it tbh. i love the focus that is put on their friendship and how emotionally charged it is when it comes to miquel and the aftermath of all that. like, a similar thing is done with norandro - because at that point, nora and alejandro were exclusively friends, but it becomes even more relevant when it's about eva. eva who, you know, was in a toxic relationship herself. i love that she herself brings up her relationship with jorge when she's talking about miquel, and how wary she is of everything that happening. the fact that she's the first one to sense it feels so right!!! i love that eskam really made them close and gave them the window scene, which is both so powerful on its message and a true love letter to female friendships.

i think eva is a really underrated eskam character as it is, like... people really don't understand how great of a character she is and how much she's grown. they are quick to call her a boring, ooc party girl once s2 rolls around, like eskam didn't spend TIME making eva herself declare that hooking up with cristian (and cristian ONLY!) was something she did out of fun and she was decided to stop as soon as it stopped being fun for her. moreover, eva is such a perceptive person: she's been that way since s1 and it has only carried across for the entirety of the show since then. and when pairing two really good characters together, like eva and nora, you really can't go wrong. their friendship brings great things out of both of them and it goes through its own arc during nora's season, whereas other seasons either dump eva as noora's bff midway through or just make them really close to introduce character drama but don't really do anything to their dynamic as it is.

romantically... sigh. i'm sorry LOL as much as i love girls kissing and wlw romance done right... i don't see potential for this relationship outside their platonic dynamic. which is, btw, incredibly strong and beautiful. i'm super contented with how eskam handled their friendship and therefore i wouldn't want anything else from them, and it's not like nooreva where the chemistry was THERE. however! i'm always open to see people's interpretations of what romantic noreva could be. wasn't it you who wrote that beautiful fic of nora realizing she's bi and falling for eva after season 3? because now THAT'S the shit i'm looking for. i think there's a lot of potential there which i'd like to see explored in fic, but other than that, i love their relationship how it is and i've never felt a desire to see them as each other romantic interests.

AMIRIS:

first things first: why did eskam NEVER confirm cris having an embarrassing, sweet, confusing childhood crush on amira? i mean, it's my headcanon that she'll later realize it and she'll jolt awake and think "holy FUCK" but like... it's a thing that isaks are into their jonases. why didn't it happen here :(((((

being honest, childhood friends to lovers has never been my thing? a simple friends to lovers doesn't do it for me: i like my relationships rocky, with lots of character moments and whose survival and success depend only on the people involved making efforts to change and do better. if you've seen s4... yeah, that's not really the case. it's just disappointing because damn, amiris is the realest thing indeed, but also... what case are the writers doing for them? because it was only irene and hajar doing the intense gazing and bringing all the chemistry home. s4 cris is a mess and a half, and while i like the idea of the bench scene featuring both of them, and being more about cris reminding amira the reasons she's made it this far instead of lecturing her about sucking it up better... the result is still lackluster. there are SO many issues on their friendship that were introduced and then dropped, and it's really nice that cris finally is there to comfort amira when shit goes down, it truly is! but what else is there? it's just a small part of s4 being a bunch of missed potential. they could've REALLY done something great with their relationship and bring back and close cris' development in the show, but we only got... well, nothing. back to 0. amira has to live with those problems, now. things like that really make it seem like once amira broadens her horizons, she won't really go back to her friendship with the girls, and cris will be a lingering wound of the past. oh well.

ehem. romantically!!!!!!! as i said, cris was totally crushing on amira at some point. like... canon really makes a point at making cris' brother amira's love interest, where dani has nothing to offer to amira than cris hasn't done yet. iftar on a rooftop? ha, loser, cris did it first. admiring her passion and her faith? cris does it arguably way better than dani. longtime pining? dude. go home. okay, i'll cut dani soto some slack since it's not about him lol. point is, if amira was charmed by all of those things, then what tells me that the option of her and cris being a thing is off the table? at the end of the day, they're indeed a relationship that needs a lot of work and patience to last. the 500k slow burn is writing itself, really.

(regardless of amiris' future, i still think irene and hajar have to do a cute romcom romance at some point. their chemistry is off the charts.)

[dragqueenpentheus]

Okay no one has to read this but i DO have to write it:

PYROC VS FATHER PAUL

Ya bitch needs an art break bc im getting angry about voices existing as i try to keep myself entertained. Today is NOT a god one for sinking into repetitive line work and that’s just about all i have on the table atm

SO! Im gunna do a little thinking about my little meow meows all fucked up by religion. Just a comparison for my sanity and interests. Pyroc is my baby i wrote him for the first time years ago. Five?????????? Whadda hell. Going on six.

ANYWAY john joined religion because of his trauma. His sister died and he felt lost. He was unmoored in this fishing village and looking for reason looking for hope. Hed had his heart broken and trying to make sense of tragedy on his own was totally beyond him. Thats why his interactions with riley in AA are SO good like. He knows that confusion and he knows the rhetoric that’s supposed to combat it. Only it dooesnt work for riley.

The same sort of thing happens for pyrc, only inverted. Loss urns him away from god and religion because its SO strong in his family and not only is he loosing trust in god, but his kin as well. He’s suspicious there’s mre they arent telling him, at the point of his fathers death. And he agrees to, on the surface, absolutely wholly throw himself in to being the second the family and the village need. But he’s keeping his treachery under wraps.

That’s one of the coolest things about father paul imo is like. That slow unraveling of what is. Frankly. An awful half assed plan, driven by fear and loneliness and desperation and dementia and love. Even VERY obvious things like. Taking down the newspaper photo of his young self ‘slip’ by him. I think, on some level, its DEEPLY intentional. He wants people to CHOOSE this. He wants people like bev. He wants people who see him and are in aw of him beating god. Of killing death. He wants to be worshiped and adored and for people to come to him willingly, no tragedy driving them to his arms.

Pyroc also wnats to be worshipped, but he ALSO wants to do the worshipping. He really longs for an element of almost????? But not quite??? Subjection?? He wants to be shown something and for a Great Voice to tell him, unquestioningly and unerringly that it is GOOD. Full stop. And then he wants to spend his life worshipping it. But this booko is an exploration of how….. no such thing exists. And more importantly no great voice exists either. There is nothing wholly good, nothing wholy evil. His lack of faith in himself once he becomes god is him starting to understand that as well. Thats on purpose baked into the lore. The starting point was ‘what if god was a position and in order to get promoted you had to be a murderer. No matter what’. He understands things are not wholly good, at that point. I onder how long it will be for him to realize they are not fully evil as well?

Bc pruitt does hm hm hm an interesting move. Where he takes something the narritve is very sure to communicate is EVIL no wiggle room just fact. Even if its driven by animal instinct its. Evil. And he makes it, not just good, but HOLY. And god i LOVEEEE that for him i ADOREEE that what a MOVE. Driven by desperation and dementia and relief and ‘if god saved me than maybe i can be good despite loving and sinning and maybe if i defeat god then i will be Thee Good’. SO sexy of him. Im really fascinated by his morality. He seems to have an understanding of the shades of grey in some respects??? But if he had a BETTER one with more forgiveness in his heart i feel like hed have left the church anyway after sarah was born??? Even if millie didnt ask him??? That might just be my own sensibilities creeping in but ….. like he culd have seen her on the weekends. He can do other jobs. Hes straight (??? Not totally convinced of this) he could have just dated her that makes me crazy. LIKE OBV HE HAD LINES HE THOUGHT THAT WOULD CROSS AND HE HAD INTERNALIZED THE CHURCH AND THE RULES AND SHE WAS MARRIED AND ECT ECT i know he couldnt have really but. Thye were straight. They coulda.

Im not gunna do fantasy homophobia bc i think its …………….. Boring. But i think some element of??? The vindlegaurd line MUST be passed along and for that particular rules must be applied. But thats also boring as hell :/ maybe i can work in my parthenogenesis lore?????????? I bet pyroc would love building that spell in any universe. That’s the sequal when he goes to magic university in helsin. But yeah i do like the concept that. Anyone can have a baby thru magic its just a time and energy commitment. Just a matter of wanting it enough together. Every baby is so deeply wanted and its mere existence is proof. Thats dope i love that. HMMM to be decided at a later date when im deeper into the story i think. I still havent figured out fully how and where and why orion is going to be invovled and if???? Pyroc and orion are even going to be romantic??????? Im torn im TORn…….

Thikns about john bonding w sarah over science and learning and starts wEEPING…. Like theres some surity beloved. Its just a matter of uncovering. I think sarah felt that same thirst for answers and hunted them differently. Her faith is in logic and science. I loveeee her god. Every scene w her and her dad absolutely RUIN me like!!!!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW!!! SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW LOVED SHE IS!!!!!! I hope at hte very end she saw the blood as the gesture of love it SO clearly was and not him trying to poison her. God i love that she spat it out. GOD. Thats about being gay, btw. Spits the religious offering that could save you across the gasoline soaked church floor like BABE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I think we as a collective should talk about the possibiites around sarah/erin more. Bc their defiance combined would be. Earth SHATTERING for crockett.

In the future pyroc gets a kid. Ever since that campaign where Enemy ended up playing his daughter im like. How did i NOT know this idiot wanted nothing more in the entire world than to travel it with his daughter. I dont care how or why hes getting a kid. Hed be so doting and awful abut it. He would need orion as a co-parent for the kids self esteem to be normal levels. thINKS ABOUT PAUL GETTING TO RAISE SARAH AND JUST ABSOLUTELY GASSING HER UPPPPPPPP HANGING EVERY DOODLE SHE EVER MADE ON TEH FRIDGE. BOASTING ABOUT HER SCEINECE PROJECT OT ANYONE WITHIN EYESIGHT EVEN THOUGH ‘WE K N O W JOHNWE WERE ALL AT THE SCEINCE FAIR’!!!!!!!!!!! Let these fuck ups be doting fathers im fucking begging. That scene where paul is like. You take ccare of everyone on the island sarah. Its more than being a doctor. You comfort them.

HM HM comfort is such a thing for Miss Bitch like!! He sees it as a Good Thing. He tries to bring it for riley by asking to hold the AA meetings on island ((also manipulation. Obvously also manipulation. I wouldnt have bene shocked if he was slipping the vampire blood into the coffee every meeting either. But thats just a theory. A game theory.)) ANYWAY he sees comfort as hly. The church gave it to him when he needed it. The angel gave it to him in the cave. Feeling safe and warm is HIGH on his list of priorities and what makes him hand over respect.

I think pyroc has lived a very comfortable life in SO many ways, but in none he. Activly recognizes. A key part of his character arc his him…. Opening his eyes to the world around them. Seeing the privilege he has and being like. Wait. This isnt Right. We have to change thi. And when no one agrees ti shifts to I have to change this. With Violence. A little revolutionary <3 it only costs the life of his whole ass family

Thats more fun comparison ground like…… paul is SO much about I know whats right and there is a cost but i AM ignoring it. Like HE KNOOOOWSSSS he knooooows he just doesnt want o See. I’m not sure if im going to surprise yroc with the ……megadeath of. His whole family. Or if it’s a choice he has to activly make. I think a choice makes it more compelling, more layerd. It has to be in the moment though, becaus ei think thats. A key difference between them. Pyroc wouldnt do it.. hed just leave hed peace out and do what he could in small ways. But he wouldnt do his big stand off with god. Hed shrink his goals in order to not hurt his family. Out of love?? Intimidation?? Some instinct wihtin him that balks at the idea of disobedience??? I think even he doesnt know. But i LOVE john becaue he jsut decides to lie. He closes his eyes and says i am being stupid on purpose. I think thats PERHAPS more compelling than good guy coward pyroc BUT!!!!! Thats who he is rip to ths little man. Cant change him now hes a whole ass child in my head. The PLOT i can change. Him….. not without massive character development <3

UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MM set my brain on FIRE!!!! Im so glad nano is coming up. I love sharpening pyroc against the comparison of other AMAZING characters. Father paul hill my beloved millstone <3 anyway sorry to anyone who reads this its literally me unhinging my jaw and emptying my brain out. I had to write stuff that wasn’t novel or fic. A little character time down and dirty. I wil NOT be editing this love and light to future me trying to decode this

[ashes-in-a-jar]

Tma relisten Episodes 16-20

Things are picking up! Martin is gone, we meet some Flesh statements with all of their disgusting glory, finally find a skeptic (pretending more like) Jon in Vittery's case and then the story of father Edwin...

A warning, the last two episodes here are a confusing mess of thoughts that I have no energy to orginized so you're welcome to read but beware to remain confused. And add your feedback if you want. I'd love to understand what the hell father Edwin was going through.

16 Arachnophobia

Things are picking up. Oh boy vittery is here!

His description of his fear of spiders kind of reminds me of my experience as an emetophobic. I can read about it, watch it on camera (cringing but still can) but near me? Nope.

Major Tom! Love the pet naming system Jonny came up with.

"Our building had acquired something of an infestation of some sort of insect I didn’t recognise - small, silvery worms, almost like maggots, but slightly longer -" uh oh Jon. Jane is already there. I stand by my theory that the web set up vittery's case where Jane was because they wanted the institute to eventually come in contact with her. Specifically the Archivist. Another way the Web helped mark Jon to help bring the apocalypse.

Pfft his whole interaction with major Tom in this story is sending. "go get that spider" Major Tom "no I don't think I will" and saunters off never to be seen again.

Why are his descriptions of spiders so graphic my god. He likes to dwell on his phobia way too much for his own well-being.

Nice aim with the coffee mug. Especially while panicking.

Don't you just hate that you get used to your phobia because a worse version of it comes up? He managed to kill little spiders no problem from then on and I just... Feel for him so much.

"Can you be haunted by the ghost of a spider that destroyed your childhood?" oh. That one must have hit Jon hard right where it hurt.

"I officially gave Major Tom’s paperwork to the family on the ground floor he decided to move in with" lol cat live be that simple.

Commenting on Jon's hard denial specifically of this case and even thought there is so much obvious evidence supporting the supernatural. Just alot of suppressing fear on Jon's part. I feel so bad for him.

"But as I told Martin earlier, he was there for over a week, so there is very likely a perfectly natural explanation for the fact that his body was completely encased in web" sure. Told Martin. Betting it was a full blown argument from which Martin stormed off to prove him wrong. Jon please get your act together.

17 the boneturners tale

Ah Jared my man making his appearance. The bully next door who picks up and becomes a victim (in a way) of a Lietner instead of the statement giver. Where have I heard that one before...

Michael crew checked out the bone book huh. Saw the Flesh and was like mmm nope not this one either.

Archivist interrupted! We don't get much of these later on, when statements become way more compelling and can't be stopped in the middle.

Ewww and the first other institute staff we get is Elias. The sound mixing is really weird he sounds so strange lol. He hasn't polished his 'I'm an even more posh version of Jon' voice yet.

He takes live statements when Rosie's equipment doesn't work? So basically all of the supernatural ones that want to talk and not write. Those are always more special than the ones written. The statement giver felt the need to talk to someone not just write impersonally.

Elias asks about Martin. Once again fuck you Jonah.

Also Martin is missing the story is picking up! I saw at the end that he was in charge of follow up for this, a library statement. Was probably fun for him seeing he's an ex library worker.

"Blessed relief" no Martin he doesn't really mean that.

Jared experimenting on everything including small animals and his own family is all sorts of bad.

"All I remember clearly is the line “and from his rib a flute to play that merry tune of marrow took”." he took a rib and used it to whistle. Jared took Jon's rib and in 171 he whistles. Hmmmmm

So either reading the book did end up killing the guy or Jared eventually caught up with him. Either way poor soul.

18 the man upstairs

Not alot to say about this one except I oddly really like it, my first listen and now. Something about how gross it was really fascinated me. And boy it's super gross.

The meat creature in the end has eyes! Is it eye aligned in a way? Interesting...

Was this an attempted mini ritual of a sort to bring a meat creature into the world? Did it work? Perhaps that creature housed whet used to be Toby Carlisle who left his original body to become this thing.

Btw Archivist has lunches confirmed!

19+20 confession + desecrated host

The only double statement we have ever. A very unusual thing but also Jon explains it that the second half was misfiled nearby and perhaps was taken out and put back haphazardly. By who? Gertrude looking up. Rituals? Jonah looking up multiple entity rituals? Very ominous.

I feel so bad for father Edwin he really didn't deserve what happened to him.

I'll be honest i wasn't really listening to this one the first time. I was busy doing something else and always tended to half listen to exorcism horror. This is facinating to me as if I'm first hearing it.

Its interesting how Jon records his inability to utter words of belief. Also was this an interview? If so, where is the recording. He couldn't have written like how Jon was stuttering at those words. I need a clarifying answer about these and why Jon needed to record an audio of it when clearly there should be a recording of an old live statement.

It wasn't about God the fact that he couldn't say it anymore. It was about his comfort and denying it.

I think the first thing that marked him was the Slaughter. But now listening to it, it seems like what possessed Bethany moved into his mind because it want to suck out and replace faith and father Edwin had much more of it. How does one replace faith? Introducing the faithful to all the fears. It didn't really work tho since he stubbornly remained faithful.

This nurse Annie figure sent him in the direction of both Bethany and Hilltop Road which makes me very suspicious of her.

“I am not for you. I am marked.” oooh first time hearing those words. Perhaps the entity or what wanted to bring them about refusing to give him to the Desolation?

“Behold, thou hast driven me out this day from the face of the earth; and from thy face shall I be hid; and I shall be a fugitive and a vagabond in the earth; and it shall come to pass, that every one that findeth me shall slay me.” the entities talking? Or warning father Edwin of his fate? Still sound alot like the Slaughter.

So when he leaves to walk the streets to the place he performs the religious service after being told all of his sins by something pretending to be father Singh, I count the Distortion, the Lonely, Stranger, Corruption? And flesh.

This one is still confusing as hell, I was surprised by breekon and hope's appearance in the end, having been the ones who delivered the stole.

Maybe the entities were trying to collaborate to create a religion of their own? Trying not to enter the world separately as a whole being but living in it as worshipped gods?

Whatever they were they decided to exclude the Desolation and the web from the project since they definitely didn't like Hilltop Road.

[mothbug]

maggie i’ve been trying to suss out the plot of ur bug lesbians for so long please tell me abt them. somehow it got into my head that they were?? like jaeger pilots? please confirm or deny

i can’t do a read more on mobile so i’m sorry in advance (coming back here after i’ve written this: it makes no sense. it’s all rambling. sorry. and i just put things everywhere randomly so this won’t even be typed chronologically)

yeah there’s giant fun robots! most of them are normal and fine but like a few of them are very fucked up

so there’s four pov characters and at the start of the story three of them are on the same ship and the fourth is the target they’re chasing? only one of them knows they even HAVE a target and is trying her best to stall because she and the target were roommates in fucked up robot catholic school. the other two are playing crazy 8s and being romantic and also terrified all the time but also doing a lot of theorizing about things because they know SOMETHING is up they just don’t know what’s going on. Bc you know. their commander won’t give them any information. and also avoids them because she hates narrative parallelism

also the one stalling is also having her blood drunk by her giant robot. and maybe being mildly possessed by it? so it’s maybe The most fucked up robot. it’s also a giant dog and a good boy. and an heirloom of a fucked up family. which may explain some stuff but honestly i think nisa’s mom was just a bitch and it didn’t have anything to do with the robot she’s just like that.

and she’s stalling bc she Knows she won’t turn perovskia in she knows she wouldn’t let her get hurt she Knows it’ll change her life forever if she finds her and she’s just not ready to face that. but yknow she has to so it was all just very silly of her but when something will change your life dramatically it’s terrifying even if you know that things currently Suck.

somewhere in here Arkansas’s family is threatened and it’s. upsetting. and i’m not sure what direction to go in with it but it will be important because her family means a Lot to her. she has two very good kind dads and a little sister named Tinsel. basically she has the only functional biological family out of all the characters and they make me :’) I also think they eventually meet Idabel and ADORE her and since she grew up without parents it’s just a very strange and emotional experience and. h. they r Wives. and the Trust family is all very sweet and kind even if Arkansas struggles a lot w gifted kid syndrome like i think her dads did their best even if they fucked up sometimes yknow. idabel goes fucking wild at the arcade like legitimately bloodthirsty and arkansas is just like i love my furious and powerful wife

anyway there’s some (a lot of) homoerotic space fighting (which perovskia usually wins BECAUSE she remembers when she and nisa used to spar and can predict what she’ll do. nisa ALSO remembers this bc. ofc she does. but perovskia had to learn how to adapt after Events bc her physical health changed a lot and she had to learn to be more careful about overexerting herself and also now knows how to swordfight. and moves more fluidly and confidently. so what nisa expects to happen often doesn’t bc perovskia’s fighting style has changed so much while nisa hasn’t really bothered to refine hers. anyway) perovskia (the gay little target that does a gay little crime and makes fun of you to piss you off) is like hey. what if you all committed treason it’s really fun and sexy. and then her adoptive mechanic mom gives everyone spinal surgery so their bodies don’t shut down and they won’t die :) that’s a thing by the way i won’t elaborate bc uhh :( but it is why perovskia has all the. nerve damage and chronic pain. i can elaborate on the actual Pre-story perovskia stuff later bc i think about it A Lot and it has a lot of bearing on her character but it’s also. before all this. but anyway if she hadn’t been bleeding out on Slice’s front lawn specifically she Would be dead. and there’s some fun narrative foil character shifts that happen four years before the main storyline but i will not say bc i’m tired

after this is Vague in my mind but a lot of it is Perovskia and Nisa reconnecting and just. talking. but being weird and repressed and deflective about anything Meaningful. And I have written a Lot about this so there’s more than I can condense but it’s very fucking good and. Idk. it’s a big shift in the narrative at this point and they’re just Agonizing about their dumb little feelings and it’s good. and P doing some work to make their giant fucking spaceship more stealthy. and Idabel and Arkansas being really cute and also going THROUGH it because i mean. a lot is happening. And it’s nothing either of them ever expected to happen but they’re like. hopeful for the future or whatever don’t look at me. It’s just like. put all of these characters on a spaceship in the middle of nowhere in transit and they all Have to have conversations even if they don’t want to because it’s HARD. nisa is forced by slice to learn how to make pancakes

Slice makes stew. They’re good at stew and contraptions and having a mild new england accent somehow. also canonically back in the scrapyard they would make things like the knife wielding tentacle constantly and perovskia would just stumble upon them. slice changed the live laugh love sign to say die cry hate because perovskia made fun of it. they r her mom.

so now they do some fun fun robberies and various crimes and it’s so sexy and i don’t think N and P are like. fully caught up at this point or know where they stand, so there’s a lot of very fun banter and having to work together despite really being afraid but also yearning to get to know each other again and just connect with one another honestly and openly after four fuckin years apart. because they’re both so different now but also very much the same. horse staring out into sea MAN. the thing is there’s no direct like. reason for them to avoid each other (at first P was shocked and overwhelmed and felt a little bit betrayed when she found out who was chasing her until she found out WHY. oh i forgot to mention Nisa BEGGED to be assigned commander for this mission bc she knew anyone else wouldn’t hesitate to get Perovskia killed. Forgot to mention that it’s IMPORTANT she fucking loves her so much god DAMMIT) but it’s just. tense and there’s a lot happening and it’s just. Ghhhdhbnm and ofc I and A have picked up on it since P showed up but it’s like. ok so what is Happening here. OH AND ONCE THEY START WORKING THINGS OUT IDABEL DOES START BEHAVING LIKE NISA’S SHITTY LITTLE SIBLING AND ACTING FUCKING DISGUSTED BY THEM ITS VERY FUNNY. they’re like perovskia you’re pretty cool what’s up with this. nisa sucks and also is a bitch. and perovskia says SHE CAN GET IT. and idabel says GET WHAT? BANNED FROM OLIVE GARDEN? and perovskia fans herself and is like yeah~ and idabel was just joking around but now is debating between mercilessly making fun of her and hitting her with a cricket bat. but god when P and N just get to hold each other in silence and security and just be. it’s . they. god. fuck. man.

oh i know this is a space story but perovskia just straight up has a sword (and some knives and maybe a gun idk) don’t ask me why idk but it’s very lesbian of her and she does gay little flourishes and is just. very annoying and i like her a lot. she’s very dramatic like her alias was madame revenant when she was living in the scrapyard and just doing some petty crimes like. she embroidered that jacket herself nobody calls her that she’s just a goofball. also warrior cats exist and she makes warrior cat fan animations. that just has to be true so warriors has been preserved for centuries. also she was presumed dead for a while uhh don’t think abt it too much but she likes that aesthetic.

Idabel takes the best to this new life of crime they are fucking FOR it she gets a FLAMETHROWER and Arkansas is like. wrow honestly my favorite thing abt them is that they’re both fucking INCREDIBLE pilots. like they know what they’re doing. and nisa is really really bad at it btw she cannot pilot a mech well. but this block of text isn’t about her i’m talking about THEM. Their chemistry is so good they r just. 🥺. and they both become Fast friends with perovskia because she’s just pretty likeable?? and ofc nisa’s jealous bc a) you guys don’t even like me :( but also b) that’s MY friend. it’s very funny. honey of course they didn’t like you you were being very unpleasant to be around. but arkansas does rlly wanna be friends with her and she and idabel have so much sibling energy it’s insane. i think they’d abel and cain each other for a scooby snack but also kill for each other. because they’re tiny girls who will growl at you solidarity and also probably hang out and just destroy things with bats sometimes. they all become closer and get a rlly sweet found family dynamic it just takes a While. oh also idabel is basically the chosen one and can set things on fire with her hands but it’s barely touched on because i think that’s a really funny thing to just ignore. but i also think it does become important because it’s largely fueled by anger and emotion and. h. i think idabel has a lot of feelings ok. Arkansas and Perovskia bond over having fucking anxiety disorders and have caprisun drinking competitions. i think it’s just like. these people all have similar trauma and need people to lean on when things are hard so they stick with each other once they have the option to split apart because by then they’re friends and work well together and Care. auto tuned baby crying mp3.

Alia and Agent Variety show up somewhere around here? They’re Slice’s very cool wives and Alia has a Vechicle Collection and own fucking stupid race cars and stuff and I love her. perovskia is afraid of being in vechiles so she has to take a fucking benadryl every time they have to make a getaway. Variety isn’t actually an Agent anymore and I also love HER because she’s very fucking good. they started out as just contacts slice had but it turns out they’re all in love <3 alia is also actually a sports car racer like. unprofessionally. illegally. which is just very cool of them.

Also i don’t think it has. a very BIG end, yknow? it’s like, they’re doing very good things and are up against a lot, and I don’t think they like.. singlehandedly take down the government or anything because they’re only a few people. but i think they get a happy ending and get to grow old while making positive changes to the world around them. like i don’t think they’ll be able to solve everything but they’re sure as hell gonna do what they can. But idk maybe they actually do get like. some good shit done. but again they’re not. an army. they’re a bunch of 20-somethings and their rube-goldberg-machine-creating chaperone. but i think they should get a fun climactic moment so i guess this is all to say i don’t. have an ending planned. but there should probably be one at some point.

OH AND the giant evil blood sucking dog vineyard vines robot Definitely almost kills Nisa (or at least fully destroys her in some way) and. it’s very narrowly avoided and she’s very very weak for a while because it took a lot out of her. also the dog robot does make grape vines grow and uhhhh any grapes that show up are 100% full of the pilot’s siphoned blood. also i think there’s still some remnants of that bitch in nisa’s mind afterwards bc an old mechanical god is hard to get rid of. but it’s mostly ok.

Also the bug people are just. a thing. like every person in the most recent generation in this specific society are at least a little bit genetically experimented on because. it sucks there. and i think if your parents bribe the government you can be a little Less fucked up but yknow. everyone’s a little weird. this was an excuse to put bug ppl in here they’re just the folks who were probably the most fucked with and i have many bug people here because i think bugs are cool and i want them to look like weird little bugs. This was all also an excuse to give the main characters fangs bc i’m gay. i don’t think randomly fucking with your genetics will make you a bug in real life so do not try this at home or at all PSA

SPEAKING of the society ok it’s very much obsessed with earth nostalgia and stuff and very yknow. basic cyperpunk shitty capitalism you know the drill you’ve seen space operas whatever but it’s also weirdly oligarchical? and like? it’s weird and bad and kind of a corporatocracy?? and. fuck. idk man they’re a fucked up space catgirl greeble-y amazon with catholic imagery. The Academy is also a thing but. idk how to describe it more than i already have it’s just kinda shitty boarding school. And after a certain point ppl can get sent on like. missions and stuff? in their fucking robots? but again i’m not sure what For. an option could be that there’s nearby Shit and nobody can tell if it’s safe because space is weird? also it’s only about 3200 so i’d say like. whole societies out in space is a relatively new thing and there’s some weird shit going on. so they sometimes send teenagers out in robots to see what’s up and that ends SUPER well for EVERYONE. hmm something SHOULD be going on actually there should be some weird eldritch space stuff. it should be connected to the more fucked up robots. it should also be Core’s fault somehow because uhhh capitalism and lack of foresight? anyway here’s women kissing i don’t know things. WAIT FUCK I FORGOT TO MENTION HOW SHADY SOME OF THE STUFF GOING ON IS LIKE THE DEATHS OF THE CREW PEROVSKIA WAS ON UHHH JUST TRUST ME DUDE like they are NOT afraid to get kids killed which was IMPLIED but also like it goes a little deeper than that and uhh i don’t know exactly what’s happening. but i’m sure it’ll all fall into place eventually. basically it’s very fatt shitty faction vibes idk how else to describe it. man it‘s like. just. there’s stuff happening they have goals and ideals and there’s probably more to it than i know so far bc stuff happens but i don’t KNOW what i’m tired and have been typing this for a year i don’t want to talk abt the bad capitalists i want to talk about tenderness and girls but unfortunately the ways in which the girls are tender are deeply informed by the environment they grew up in so i do have to think about it even if they all deserved better.

i think they all get a cat or a dog or something eventually. like they all deserve it. i think the final home they build together is actually pretty reminiscent of the scrapyard house. i think they get to live there for the rest of their lives and. just build something small and wonderful for themselves :’)

also i forgot to put men in the story they exist i just forgot about them. there’s nisa’s one ex i already forgot his name but he’s mentioned i think.

[kessielrg]

[Mega Man X AU] Follow Me

Summary: After Axl breaks a promise with Aero to help fix her car, they instead go to a trampoline park to, in his words, 'fly above their worries'. Aero doesn't buy it, but Axl's hard to say no to. [oneshot]

Rating: T (for swearing)

Word Count: 2,419 words

If you like this story, please reblog!

---

Aero hated the summer heat; especially when she had to work on a broken transmission for her car in said heat. She was smart enough to leave out a jug of water beside her tools, but it was so hot out that it wasn't even cool anymore. The only thing she had to keep her company -and to drown out her numerous curses- was a portable radio, tuned to a station that played mostly mainstream music.

During some song with an exceedingly repetitive chorus, Aero took a small break from wrecking her car further to take a swing from her water jug. Savoring what she could from the lukewarm liquid, Aero found herself checking her watch for the time. A full hour had passed since she started this futile mission- she was a computer science nerd for God's sake, not a car nerd. Maybe if she was less frugal, she could have taken it to an actual dealership, but that was just the thing: she wasn't supposed to start this alone. Axl, who could hot-wire a car in his sleep and once worked on other (similarly shady) car related activities as a side job, had promised to help her. But, as obvious circumstances could show, he never showed up.

Taking another swing from her water jug, Aero looked back at her transmission and decided she was done for the day. No matter how much she needed her car, a heatstroke wasn't going to go over well for her health either. When Aero entered her home, she almost fainted from the cool air as it instantly covered her body like a well dosed drug. She just barely managed to stumble to the couch and flopped herself down. Aero might have even passed out for a few moments before coming to again- she felt groggy enough that she wondered if she did. Too lazy to go to the kitchen to actually drink something cold, Aero reached over on the coffee table for her phone.

Surprise, surprise: Axl had texted her when she had been working on her car. None of them pertained to his broken promise though.

Axl, 12:32 PM: Zero's laying the insults thick on you today so of course I defended your honor.

Axl, 12:34 PM: called him goldilocks twice just for you

Axl, 12:35 PM: your welcome btw

Okay, so she had to snort at that, but that didn't mean she wasn't still angry at him.

Aero, 1:22 PM: fuck you

Axl, 1:24 PM: okay

Axl, 1:24 PM: so I know I deserved that somewhere along the line today

Axl, 1:25 PM: but what did I do now?

Aero, 1:26 PM: one word loser: transmission

It didn't even take a minute after that Aero got a call from Axl himself. She answered it, but said nothing- as if the dark glare she was giving could radiate through the phone. It seemed to have worked, because once Axl realized she had picked up, he immediately said,

“Aero, I swear I didn't forget to help you.”

“Bitch you lie.” Aero hissed without skipping a beat.

“Yeah, okay, I absolutely am.” Axl sheepishly admitted. “And I'm totally sorry for it! What can I do to make it up for you Breezy? I swear I'll do whatever you want.”

To this, Aero cocked an eyebrow of interest.

“So when I get heatstroke?”

“I'll carry you to the hospital.”

“And when I get a sunburn so bad that I'll cry because I can't sleep or move because it hurts too much?”

“I'll rub aloe on you so gentle and smooth that X and Zero will be jealous.”

“And the outrageous bill the dealership's gonna give me to fix that damn transmission?”

For this, Axl hesitated. Aero found herself amused at this silence and found herself smirking at the challenge.

“I'm waiting.” she reminded him.

It was quite a bit of time before Axl quietly suggested, “I'll help take it to the dealership...”

“Like hell you will.” Aero snorted in return.

“And we'll go some place too while we wait.”

“Oh will we now?” the young woman mused. “And where would that be?”

“It's a secret.” came the cheeky answer. “Just get ready tomorrow and I'll take it from there.”

“You better not be lying to me, loser.” Aero hissed.

“Yeah, yeah. Be ready by noon- I've got plans to make!” Axl returned before hanging up the phone. For a moment, Aero just looked at her phone before letting out a deep sigh. Whatever Axl had planned, it sure was going to be… something: he always had better ideas than in ways on how to execute them. Knowing him, Aero was almost certain that it wasn't going to be as simple as going to a diner or watching a movie. Letting out another sigh that signaled the start of a headache, Aero started to dial X's number to talk about the situation.

. . .

It was just as hot the next day, so Aero waited for Axl inside her house. He didn't bother to show up until a little after eleven with his orange truck. Just to spite him, Aero still waited in her house as Axl attached her car to his truck's ball hitch and she still didn't come out when he waved to her- signaling that he was ready for her to come out. When he realized that she wasn't going to come out, Axl gave a small sigh before making his way to her door. Even after he rung her doorbell, Aero still waited a few moments before going to answer it.

When Aero swung her door open, the blast of hot air from outside greeted the cool air inside her house. Standing at the door was Axl with a sheepish hand behind his head.

“Still mad, huh?” he chuckled.

“Just slightly.” Aero mused with a smart little grin. She leaned against her doorframe before proceeding to ask, “Are you going to bother to tell me where we're going today?”

To this, Axl gave a wide smile of his own. “'Course not!” he proudly declared. “You're going in blind after we drop your car off.”

“Lucky me.” Aero snorted.

She should have known right then and there that Axl had something horrible planned. But for some reason she did not, so the duo walked to his truck and got inside. There was not much for the two to talk about on the drive to the dealership. Aero did give Axl some flack for when she got back into his truck after leaving her car behind. But they were back on the road again to wherever Axl planned to surprise her just as quickly.

Axl's truck was just old enough to still have a cassette player attached to its stereo. Some years back he had made a mix tape filled with songs that he knew Aero liked, and right now he had purposely stuck it in the player for them to listen to. Admittedly, it was rather relaxing as Aero looked out the window, watching as various scenery flew past them. It was when she noted a particular sign that a flare of suspicion shot through her body.

'Circus Man's Trampoline Park: Just a Mile Away!'

She should have asked Axl about it right then and there, but she didn't. She liked to pretend to give him the benefit of the doubt every now and again. But the feeling that this was exactly where Axl was taking her did not go away. Her eyebrows furrowed deeper as the path to the trampoline park became more obvious. She waited until Axl made a turn at the entrance that she finally gave him a glare that had been growing for the past few minutes.

“You're joking.” Aero demanded. He turned to look at her for a moment with a rather cheeky grin. It only fueled her annoyance more. “You have got to be fucking joking me Axl!”

“Where else are you going to fly above your worries, Breezy?” he said back, as if it were as simple as day.

“You ass!!” she indignantly hollered before making slightly aggressive punches to his face.

“Wait 'til I'm parked, wait until I'm parked Breezy!” Axl shouted back, trying to dodge and fend her off with one hand and trying to steer into the parking lot with the other. When he had the truck properly parked, he remained in his seat as Aero continued to hit him. She didn't seem to realize that they had parked for a moment, and when she did, she paused her assault to unbuckle.

“First you forget to help me with my transmission,” she spat at him, listing each offense off with her fingers, “Then make me pay the full bill at the dealership, and now you try to make it up by taking me to the fucking trampoline park?!”

“Well, when you phrase it like that...” Axl mused as he started to unbuckle as well.

“Axl, I'm going to murder you!” Aero screamed once more as she started to hit him again.

It was her fighting spirit that Axl liked the most about her. Not all girls could hold a grudge like this, and that truly made Aero one of a kind.

. . .

“I'll play popcorn if you don't attempt to have some fun.”

“Try me.”

Between the two of them, there were no adults. Axl was still obviously a child in some regards, and in moments when Aero would curl herself into a ball of annoyance while Axl jumped around her, it became clear that neither of them acted their age.

“Alright Breezy, you asked for it!” Axl decided as he started to bounce a bit more purposely. “Get ready to be popped!”

He only gave Aero time to give a grunt before he started to bounce around her. Despite her body starting to gain momentum in bouncing from Axl's jumps, Aero remained in her ball of annoyance for quite a while. It was when Axl almost tripped over her that Aero came out of her little ball to protect her face from Axl's foot.

“You can not stop the popcorn master!” Axl proudly declared, even flexing his muscles for the fun of it. After enjoying his hubris for a moment, he offered a hand to Aero to help her up. She looked up at it for a moment before giving him a smirk.

“Such a gentleman.” she mused as she accepted his hand.

“You know it!” he agreed with a wide grin. Aero only shook her head in playful exasperation. Axl admired her for a moment before suddenly getting an idea. “Come on,” he told her, taking her hand without permission, “Let's go throw ourselves off the wall! It'll be great!”

“Axl, wai-” Aero tried to say but didn't have the chance to finish as Axl pulled her along. It was honestly kinda hard to keep up as Axl almost ran on the trampolines like he learned how to walk on them. Aero barely had time to give Axl warning as she lost her balance. All Axl knew was that Aero let out a yelp of surprise, then the two of them were careening to the side. Aero ended up falling almost directly on her back with Axl on top of her. With the wind knocked out of both of them, the duo could only stare at each other in bewilderment.

Axl would have recovered sooner had he not stared into Aero's dark brown eyes.

“Admit it,” Axl then cheekily told her with a smirk. “You wanted to make out with me for half a second.”

“Get a load of yourself.” Aero snorted in return, pushing Axl off her. Axl remained where he was and laughed as Aero started to get up and brush herself off. From his lower position, he still caught himself admiring her as Aero fluffed her hair a bit.

Speaking a thought, he carefully said to her, “You know, I don't get the way X treats you, Breezy. I mean, he talks about you like he likes you a lot, but he normally never really acts like it. He doesn't buy you dinner, he won't lead you on, he just… acts like he's talking to another friend with you. Doesn't that bug you?”

“Does X have to flirt with me to show he likes me?” Aero questioned, looking at Axl with a raise of her eyebrow. “There are different love languages, Axl.”

“And X speaks nothing but gibberish.” her friend retorted with a bitter snort. He worked himself up with a grunt so he could give Aero proper eye contact. “Aero, please, I've been crushing on you for so long that I'm practically dust by now. Let X go. He's not interested in you.”

For a moment, Aero didn't know whether to agree with him or call him out for acting desperate. Her hesitation was evident on her face as well. Seeing it made Axl deflate a little.

“I'm gonna go jump off one of the platforms, then.” he said to her with a sullen sigh. “Don't wait up for me.”

“Axl, I-”

“Don't utter a thing,” he said, cutting her off with a rather dramatic raise of his hand. “I already know what you're going to say. 'Axl, I'm just not interested in you. X is the only one I trust enough to love like that after it happened. I like you, just not like that. Maybe in the next life. It's not you, it's me...'”

“Well, you downer,” Aero mused as she put a hand on her hip, “I was going to say that I had a fun time today. Even though you did jack squat in regards to my car. But if you want to turn this into a rejection moment, then by all means.”

Axl immediately perked up as he looked back over at her. “So I still have a shot?”

“Don't think I said that.”

“Don't think you're refuting it either.”

Aero shifted her weight to the side while Axl continued to give her a wide, cheeky grin.

“Let's race over to the other end of the room.” Axl happily suggested. “If you lose, you and I are going on a proper date. On the count of three; one...”

“I don't think I agreed to-”

“Three!” Axl merrily declared before jumping back onto the trampolines and starting to sprint away. Aero took a moment to laugh at him before making her way back onto the trampolines as well.

[2ofswords]

for your analysis meme: clara

This is going to be so much fun and so very tough, because Clara is such an amazingly complicated character! God, I love her so much but part of that is because she is very ambivalent and hard to describe. She is one of these characters where you can find an opposite trait for every other one she has (which is kind of the point of her). Also: I still haven’t played the Changeling route in Patho1 and I have a stronger understanding of the Patho2 universe… so bear with me. I will try my best to analyse our favorite saint.

their biggest strength

I needed to think a while about this one and the term that stuck with me was attentive cleverness. Because I really couldn’t decide if I wanted to call her attentive or clever and luckily these two can be combined into something, I find pretty precise for what I want to describe. Clara is very clever and has a lot of knowledge that not really anyone else in the patho-universe can gain (or at least the amount of it, people share bits and pieces). She is the healer most aware of the meta-narrative and at least in routes that aren’t hers is telling you either that she knows more than you do or straight out telling you something, you needed to know (and probably didn’t want to). As is obvious by her focus on hands and talking her main skill is also interaction with other people… but I think a lot of it comes from the fact, that Clara is a good listener. Which seems to be counter-intuitive because listening is assigned as Artemy’s domain in the artbook, but I think the other word used – rhythms – is pretty important here. Artemy’s skill is finding connections, intuit solutions as well as similarities and differences (there is a reason he realizes his similarities to Aglaya’s description of the inquisition) and gaining cultural knowledge that he then transforms into practical and usable abilities. Clara’s “listening” is more about singular people’s well-being and personal struggle. (She is like a good therapist. If your therapist wanted to convert you into a sacrificial religion. ^^) She interacts with her surroundings directly and attentively. I mean, she is very well informed very early on without really having a live before that or at least not in town (again, I did not play the changeling route yet and do not know her origins or how ambiguous they are kept at the end. Either way, she arrives in town at the beginning of the game and navigates her way pretty well.) However only calling her attentive sounds like the trait is a passive one which is not something I mean. Both her personas as a saint and a thief use her knowledge that is gained by being attentive in unconventional ways and/or for unconventional means. As noted in the beginning, Clara is very clever and that in combination with her noticing even small discrepancies and listening to people makes her able to peek behind the curtain of the game in the first place. It also helps to get yourself into places people normally wouldn’t want a teenage girl to be and Clara knows and is fully willing to use this ability. It is both the reason why she knows so much more about the greater scope of the disaster and also why she always seems to be able to get into any place she wants to. By the way, just as an afterthought: Of course that ability doesn’t come and is in fact enhanced by empathy. I do not think, Clara is listening to people only to use them and to gain information. You can genuinely be willing to listen to someone and still use the information you get out of these conversations. Listening carefully and actively engaging with other people is a great part of that strength!

their greatest weakness

Does “not being able to hold a knife when the town wants you dead” count as a weakness? Okay seriously, I have a really hard time to put what I consider her weakness into one expressive term. So I will talk about it first at length and then we will see. What caught my mind first was ironically Clara’s problems with communication. That might be the case because, yes, I still haven’t played her route, so I am working mostly on her ways of communication with the other healers. But Clara really has a lot of strong points that she has trouble getting across or acknowledged. Sometimes that is definitely not her fault and one of her problems is, that she is not taken seriously by other people. But trying to persuade someone to their cause and emphasizing the reason with an elaborate monologue how the other healers are demons. Daniil was genuinely asking, why you wrote your letter about your destiny, it’s fine! Same happens in Pathologic 2. Saying someone to stay put when they are in a pretty bad spot already is not a bad idea and Artemy is pretty open to both warnings and clairvoyance in general but saying. “Nope, do literally nothing even if you know you want to, I am a better doctor anyways” is… yeah hurting him in his professional pride isn’t exactly a smart move. Often it feels like she really has a chance to explain and the other healers would probably listen but then there is just a terrible miscommunication. (Which is a thing for all of the healers but Clara I-am-going-to-call-your-father-a-horrible-person-while-we-are-at-his-funeral Saburova… Look, it might be true but it is also hilarious.) But putting communication skills here would still be weird, since… you know… she is pretty good at communicating in different ways! And also all three healers are pretty prone to miscommunication albeit in different ways and for different reasons… So I think we have to dig a bit deeper still… So why is this happening and hindering her? There are multiple reasons to come to this conclusion. One I would call childlike stubbornness. (Which btw. Is also one of her strengths, but… it is Clara, everything is also its opposite. God I love her so much, she is just so hard to describe, it’s amazing!) Even with all of her wisdom and cleverness… Clara is still a child. As she should be, it makes her so much more interesting! But she also has this childlike quality of just… assuming people will completely understand and accept what she is trying to see and getting frustrated the moment it doesn’t happen. This is one of her contradictions. She is so very attentive, and she can touch other people with her hands as well as her words, but she also is inexperienced and doesn’t really know a lot about the world or about how to socially approach people which can be a big problem, if she desperately needs someone to listen. The other argument would be about her role in the plot and the way she regards her own role as well as the other healers. She is the most aware one and she does indeed know a solution to the dilemma of the story (if we do not conclude that this is a three way battle, but I exclude my thoughts about the factions themselves for this. She definitely though knows how to get rid of the town vs. polyhedron conflict) but this also puts her in direct opposition to both healers. Which… you know is completely fair and not a weakness. But, she is very uncompromising about this and while all of them are – at least when they are not the main protagonists – Clara is the most unmoving and also uncompromising of the three, telling everyone always very directly how she things the others are shit. Which again, is very justified but becomes a big problem when she needs help and makes it harder for her to express her own thoughts, even if they are very justified and might even help all parties. Speaking in riddles and of concepts beyond something we would see as our reality surely doesn’t help there either.

a headcanon about their childhood

Oh dear, tbh I am not even sure how metaphorical she just crawled out of the earth at the beginning of the game and if she even has a proper childhood… I think it is pretty literal but there are allusions in Patho2 that she actually has a past? At least she speaks about it and I guess it can be as made up as real. (A classic Clara move ^^) And having no defined past is kind of a big thing for her so… sorry, no childhood headcanon here.  

a headcanon about their future (if they have one)

Again, I am not really sure if she stays in town or leaves with Block and I have read fanfiction with both, so I am not sure if there is a consensus in fandom either… If she stays in town I imagine her still being with the Saburovs but I do not know, if I really like this headcanon, since abandoning your newly found orphan in the middle of a plague is really something that should revoke parent rights… But on the other thing the position among the mistresses seems to still be pretty defined at least in the endings in Patho 2. I like to see her travelling with Block at least for a while. Maybe not at the front, that would be just… bad. But she also seems like the person who would just poke their head around at random intervals and nobody really knows, when she will get back and somehow Clara still knows exactly what is going on in town… Still she also seems pretty bound to the place and she has business there… it’s a tough call. She will definitely fire up the rivalry of the mistresses by a lot though. Probably even if she is just there for a second, she would definitely sow some mischief between Capella and Maria! Another triad of petty politics for her! Yay?

a small detail/scene that leaves a great impact

Oh dear, every scene she is in is just so impactful! (Also never knowing which Clara is with you right now (if there even is a difference) doesn’t make this easier...) I really like her quest in Artemy’s run, where she is upset about not knowing what exactly she is in the first place… but that is not really a small details or scene. Same goes for the cathedral and her offer to meet the inquisitor together with Dankovsky to stand up for that whole disaster. Which is still a really heroic but also not really a small scene and there is nothing to talk about there aside from “man, is Clara brave and set on doing the right thing!” I also think the letter about her ending is really interesting because it is just so out there and giving all of her bound a demonic nickname is just so over the top, but tbh all of the ending letters are very… passionate. So this might be more the games writing even if they lampshade it and talk to each other like the other one is the only healer in town who wrote a completely insane letter… But I digress. While I love Clara’s Patho1 design, I will say that I love her shaved hair in Patho2 and the commentary the artbook has for it. Seeing it as a sign of sickness or a deliberate mark of sainthood is just so on point for her! It is a really nice visual piece for her characterization and I also think putting the beany on top of it makes it even better. It is contradicting but firstly she deliberately kind of tries to hide her own contradictions (I mean, it is not part of her! It is just the sister, she is wrong!), which is also a nice added detail. Also, she might combine contradicting elements, but god, she is doing it with style!

their philosophy/worldview (or part of it) described in one neat little sentence

I am throwing the towel! How should this even work with Clara??? She has different philosophies and worldviews! Also, I think they differ a bit between the first and second game. The first one aligns a lot with the humble faction from what we hear but in the second game her dialogue alludes more vaguely to touching and changing people and not necessarily to “The right people must die for our world to continue” which is most of what I heard from her. Hm… How about: A saint’s duty is to touch the immoral and diseased, thus one can never rid themselves of all dirt. I am not that happy with this one, but… at least it has the whole touching other people thing in it and it is about good people not being pure, which also is a theme with her. It still sounds a bit judgemental and I don’t really like this emphasis of the “dirtied” but… I mean this is what Clara talks about in her letter, so I still think it fits, even if I would dare to say that she shows a lot more compassion than this sentence shows.

[flyswhumpcenter]

Bad Things Happen Bingo! The event where you send me requests according to this marvelous card! (Red cross is the completed prompt, character headshots are prompts I’ve already filled. Green deltas are for requested prompts.)

Choo choo, the Sickfic Express has just arrived in Galar, straight from Oreburgh City! 

First fic of 2020 is a sickfic oneshot. How rivetting. I've very recently beaten Pokémon Sword and loved it! I found myself really loving the characters, what they are and what they've already become in my mind, so I couldn't help myself but type what I know best... A sickfic. Also, this fandom needs more of this stuff, so here. I'm providing. Is this story OOC? Chances they are. Was it absolutely a blast to write? You bet. I'm probably gonna look back on it later down the lane and be uncomfortable with how I depicted the characters; but you do need to discover the characters first, and what better opportunity for that than a little sickfic with some angst and pre-rel dramatic tension? Anyway, I hope you'll like this lil' thing I busted out in literally a couple hours. I forgot how fun it was to write without worrying yourself over continuity or already established elements like in Earth Never Stops... Btw, this fic was originally requested to me as a FE3H fill for Hubert, so I decided I'd most likely use another square on my card for him. Sorry Nonnie for this, my inspiration got the best of me yet again! 

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Candles in the Rain

Summary: Is feverishly staggering through the damp streets of Hammerlocke under the rain with very little hope to feel warmth again and even less sense of direction a fitting end for a former Champion now that he's been defeated once? Scratch that: he doesn't have the time or brain power remaining to process such a question. Or: Leon witnesses a miracle in the form of a little dog and a childhood friend.

Fandom: Pokémon Sword and Shield (post-canon/game: beware for spoilers) Relationships: Pre-relationship Leon/Sonia

Wordcount: 3.1K words

Event hosted by @badthingshappenbingo​

AO3 version available here.

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The streets of Hammerlocke are covered by a thick layer of rainwater, typical early winter in Galar. Nobody dares going against the terrible weather, which isn’t unlike the flooding that almost ate Kabu’s region of origin, or rather how he once described it based on bedtime stories, a couple thousand years ago. Honestly, after what Galar just went through, he can believe the tale to have been real all along, no issue there…

As always, he’s lost in the grand city of his main rival, and that frustrates him. He’s cold from the water having filled his shoes and wet his hair for hours and hours on end, not even the fire of the camp being able to make him feel warmer. If it wasn’t for his partners’ demands, urging him to stop camping in the wilderness and find a Centre already, he’d have surely stayed in the Wild Area and biked to a better spot. Ah, he misses Postwick, now. At least, he can’t get lost in Postwick, there’d be Hop and his now-Champion best friend, if not Sonia paying them all a visit, and there’d be the warmth of his childhood home… Gods, perhaps he does miss the peaceful life of a ten-year-old whose only contact to the Gym Challenge is dreams of grandeur.

Ah, if it didn’t rain so badly, Charizard could be warming the both of them as he tried to make his way to the nearest Centre.

 Despite his best efforts to remain proud and confident, he ends up having to lean against a wall to stop a coughing fit from suddenly urging itself out of there. He must look pathetic and he does wish, deep down, that someone would get out of their house for a reason or another, recognize him like literally everybody in Galar; but his pride and brand would be on the line, and nobody is fighting against the terrible, terrible weather today. He’s all alone in the streets of the city, pushing himself from the wall with wobbly arms, trying his hardest to remember where to go with slow, hazy thoughts…

Even if he was cold merely moments before, his head now burns. He feels too hot under clothes that are wildly unfitting of such a muddy season, despite the hair rising on what is exposed of his arms. A Cramorant stole his jacket when he was training, a Linoone tried to steal his stuff, and he ended up having a Pokemon knocked out and losing most of his healing items in the kerfuffle. It really hasn’t been his day, lately…

 His chest hurts. Not from the outside, as if he had injured himself in one of the falls he endured trying to feel from the Wild Area with no Pokemon to battle with and the slippery grass constantly trying to get the best of him, but from the inside. He doesn’t doubt the possible existence of bruises under the shirt that sticks to his limbs like a second, drenched skin; but this isn’t it. It intensifies when he coughs and it rattles strangely. When he tries to ignore the excruciating weather wishing for his demise, he hears the strange sounds his breathing now makes. He doesn’t know them so, in a moment of out-of-character lack of reason, he gets scared of them and vaguely wonders about worst-case scenarios.

It isn’t just his chest either. It’s his throat, it’s his mouth, it’s his feet, it’s his legs. Everything in his body is tired and screaming for rest, but he cannot provide it for any of his own self at the moment, stuck trying to navigate with what little he can distinguish with almost-closed eyes from how much he has to squint. His eyes can’t focus anymore, this much he realizes with a bitter sense of resignation, so everything he sees is blurry, including the weird gooey stuff he keeps coughing out whenever he can’t breathe anymore and has to stop for who knows how long.

 He trips over his own unmade shoe tie, losing in one fell swoop what was left of his balance, and falls right into the rainwater that has accumulated on the ground. It sounds and looks and feels like it’s the end, that this is where his journey ends: in some damp street of a city that he has never been able to find his way in, alone, cold and hot at the same time, rain burying him with the rest of the pavement. Not that he even thinks he has the energy to go on… Not like that. Not when his strength, the only thing he thought he had left, has all but given up on him too. Truly alone in a time where, sitting against a giant wall, he realizes what has been going on and poisoning his breath. Hah, ironic.

Still, this isn’t how he should admit defeat. He’s been won over now, and recently at that, and it’d be more than a shame for him to all but give up now. He needs to bring his team to the Centre, he can’t not try taking his revenge on the new Champion, he can’t not at least prove his superior battle skills to Raihan yet again, he just can’t leave Hop, and Sonia, and everyone else like that…

So he rises up once again, on weak arms and unsteady legs, almost tripping over himself, shoulder stuck against the wall. He won’t let this be the end of him.

 Even with a new resolve, it still doesn’t make it much better for him. Unless there’s a miracle happening right before him, he’s stuck with his heavily weakened state trying to find a place whose location he has no idea. His phone doesn’t seem to be able to show a map, its signal disturbed after whatever happened to it while he was looking or doing the polar opposite, so he’s stuck with his truly inefficient sense of orientation.

But it’ll be okay. It’ll have to be okay, because he needs to see Hop become a Professor, to buy Sonia’s new book, to rematch the Champion and his Leader friends, to give his team at least one more chance to shine. It’ll be okay, surely it’ll be okay, of course it’ll be okay… It’ll be okay, because this is all a terrible nightmare he’s going to wake up from, where he isn’t stuck in the torrential rain with a fainted party and very little hope of finding way out.

It’ll be okay, oh so okay…

 He tumbles and falls over again, this time hitting the ground with no grace whatsoever, most likely scratching elbows and knees in the process. Even rising his head up as not to cough in water when a fit claws at his throat again takes most of the energy he has left, only for his blurry sight and cottoned-down hearing to spot the first good thing in who knows many hours: a familiar yelp and vague brown-and-yellow figure rushing towards him.

With a trembling and feeble hand, he tries reaching out to the Yamper who has guided him so many times out of dangerous situations, only for an oh so familiar voice to yell in his direction. Still, it’s hard to know if it’s real or just his imagination. Ah, well; he’ll have to see when he’ll have woken up. If he even wakes up from the darkness starting to invade his vision…

  “Yamper, where in the world are you running like that?!” This creature never stops running, doesn’t it? “Yamper, wait for me!”

If she’s used to her trusty furry assistant running around everywhere it goes and pursuing it, Sonia has to notice there’s something odd in the air. Yamper never goes this fast, especially not in a city where it could smash muzzle first into people. There’s an urgent feeling to its yelps as it runs in one precise direction.

 As suddenly as Yamper started running when she had just gone out of the vault to investigate a little bit more into the Galar mythos she had become a specialist of, it stops right in its tracks in a little street she’s frankly never seen nor noticed before. With how much it’s raining and how unlikely it is to stop pouring soon, she doesn’t want the both of them out for much longer than needed.

She stops to regain her breath, hands on her knees as she folds in two, wet red hair hanging from her head. Yamper stays in place, running around her in circles, then disappearing from her view into the old, little street covered in rain and shadows. It doesn’t seem to have any intent on leaving soon.

 --------

“Why did you… bring me here…? Seriously, it’s raining Growlithes and Purrloins…!”

Still, Sonia gets herself together and goes on to follow her “assistant”. There’s dread building in her chest and stomach that she can hardly ignore… She’s seen enough movies as a teenager to know where this is going. She’s going to end up tangled into some messed-up situation, isn’t she…?

 Her heart skips a beat when she notices a very familiar person lying face down on the pavement, drenched to the bone. A person who hasn’t given her any response or sign of life for a few days.

Someone who’s gotten lost in Hammerlocke again.

 -------

 When he wakes up, everything feels different than the last time he’s been awake. It’s all white, dry and soft. He stills feels too hot and too cold, breathing remains a chore and he wishes he wasn’t there anyway; but he supposes he’s now safe and, honestly, he can’t think of anything much worse than treading through the torrential rain with little strength left.

Now, if he knew what the thing on his face was, he’d be doing a bit better, but his arms feel like they’re made out of lead and he lacks the energy to rise them to his mouth and at least touch it…

 “Leon?”

The voice, even if it’s muffled, is undoubtedly Sonia’s. He can’t quite put a finger on why exactly, yet he feels like this confirms something. If his chest didn’t feel so heavy and full, he’d have sighed in relief. That doesn’t prevent him from coughing again when trying to respond to his own name.

“Let me do the talking, okay? I’m sure you have a metric ton of questions to ask, but for the love of Galar, spare your voice unless necessary.”

 Now that his vision is focusing again, he notices both the pipe inserted in his wrist and the frown on her face. She seems less than content with something. What, he doesn’t quite know, and thinking hurts his head even further than it already bothers him, heavy on his neck despite resting on a pillow. Speaking of which, where is his stuff? His clothes?

“Hey, hey, hey,” Sonia rises from her chair and puts her hands on his chest, putting him back into his mattress. “You stay here and don’t cause anyone any worry more than you’ve already done!”

 He’s confused as to why she’s so adamant on him not doing anything. No speaking, no moving… If he didn’t feel this drained and lethargic, he’d absolutely get back at her with playfulness. Well, that does kind of answer his own question, doesn’t it? Or, at least, it seems to make sense to his brain which has troubles keeping up with the situation…

Yet, he sees a small smirk contrast with her frowned eyebrows. She seems… pained. Pained by what, or who, he doesn’t know; he’s most likely at least partially responsible for it, because she wouldn’t be there otherwise.

 “I don’t know how you’ve ended up in that situation exactly, Leon, but you’ve managed to surpass yourself in terms of putting yourself in harm’s way. You’ve scared us before, but not to that extent!”

“I…” His voice sounds hoarse and it absolutely feels that way. “It’s complicated…”

“Your entire party was fainted, safe for Charizard who was about to follow; you somehow bricked your phone in the process and ended up catching more than a death of cold. Where were you during all that time?!”

Sonia sounds a bit too scared for someone who’s facing her childhood friend stuck in a bed.

“The Wild Area…”

“That’d explain why you were soaked to the bone when I found you lying in a puddle… You’ll have to excuse me for using that crude language, you scared everyone on that one!”

 It’s his turn to ask a little question, even if the state of his body makes him want to remain quiet. Still, no matter how intelligent she is, Sonia doesn’t read minds, so he’s somewhat forced to go through with it if he wants his answers.

“Where are we?”

“A clinic in Hammerlocke. I forgot to add you also scared the ER staff with how bad your breathing was.” Has to be that irritating wheezing sound he’s hearing since he’s woken up. “By the way, since I know you’re going to ask me about that, your team is safe and doing much better now. They’re all gently resting in their balls while you recover.”

He misses Charizard and everyone else already. He owes them a big apology, that’s for sure, but he’s also certain his brain can’t process much right now. Sometimes, you just need to admit yourself to have been defeated… even if it bothers you to no end.

 Sonia paces around for a little bit before sitting down on the chair next to the bed, arms still crossed. She sounds more than frustrated, and, well… He can’t really hold it against her, can he? He already can barely hold anything against her to begin with, considering how much they’ve lived through together; it’s not today, in these circumstances, that he’ll try finding a reason for her not to be frustrated. Who knows how long he’s been gone without giving news: he frankly, forgot how quickly or slowly time was passing while he was wandering through the Wild Area.

“At least, you’re still here and breathing with us. Just, if you could not do that ever again, it’d be better, you know? I can’t always be there worrying after you when I’m now a Prof! Arceus, I don’t even imagine what sequence of events has thrown you into such a state. You looked absolutely pitiful when Yamper found you.”

 He tries to puff at himself to ease the tension he feels rising, but all he ends up doing is coughing. And coughing. And coughing.

“What did I say about sparing your voice? Tch, you’ll never change, will you? You’ve always stubborn, after all, so there’s no reason that’ll change now. That’s part of your charm, I suppose.” She shrugs before suddenly darting her eyes away from him. “But you’re right, I shouldn’t have to worry! You were the Champion of Galar for more than ten years, why would I be afraid of you? That makes very little sense, haha!”

“S-Sonia…”

 He only now spots the dark rings under her eyes and the hair pulling out of her ponytail, one strand at a time. How long was he out for, and for how much of that time was she there, exactly? (Hey, he does work fairly well, for someone who can’t stop sweating and whose entire frame is shaken up by chills at irregular intervals!). Too many questions, too little available brain space, he guesses…

“Go for it, make fun of your good old friend who still hasn’t gotten the memo. I should have been like Hop and blindly believed you’d come back to us, as you’ve always done…”

Oh, right, Hop! How is he doing, has he advanced in his research, does he still worry for him? Well, sadly, it’s not the time to think about his brother: his childhood friend seems to have a meltdown right in front of him.

“Why?”

 Sonia stares at him, completely silent, eyes wide. Seems like she doesn’t have an answer to her own interrogation, until pain comes back on her face like the wave crashing on the shore.

“You don’t… think it’s ridiculous?”

“What?” His throat doesn’t take kindly to his attempts at having a conversation.

“Everything! We swore we’d trust each other, but look at me, worrying over you as if we were still kids running in the fields with the Wooloos… And I’m telling you all that while you’re cooking on the inside! Really, isn’t that ridiculous?”

 Gathering his breath and his strength, he rises up with shaky arms against the bedhead, pillow still preventing his head from entirely lulling over his shoulder from how heavy it is. Whatever he’s caught, it’s one hell of an affliction he’s found himself with. Still, if it’s for Sonia, if she’s this distraught over the situation (he did almost pass away), he can put up with the migraine, the difficult breathing, the mask over his mouth, the lethargy, the chills…

“I’m sorry, Sonia.”

He does cough immediately after apologizing, as expected. For once, she doesn’t reply immediately, doesn’t make a witty remark; instead, she looks confused and maybe embarrassed, considering the red he can see with the eyes that still refuse to entirely focus for more than a few seconds.

“Sorry for what? And, again, spare your voice, you…”

“For all of this.”

 Her expression softens, eyebrows drooping and eyes shining brighter. Even if it’s slight and his eyes almost miss it, she finally smiles.

“How long…?” He’s interrupted by a fit.

“How long you’ve been out?” He nods, still trying to calm his chest down. “Around half a day. You did wake up at some point but immediately passed out again. No wonder why you don’t remember that.”

He now points at her with an unsteady finger. “Why are you… Oh, how long I’ve been here?” He nods again. “Most of that time, I’d say. I’d also say I fell asleep at some point too…”

 She crosses her arms again, just as his vision starts weakening again. It’s back to sleep, right?

“I think we both need our rest. I’m also certain Hop is waiting at the door, so you’ll even have a guardian angel watching over you, isn’t that super cool? And if you attempt rising from that bed, you’re sure to be put back into it in mere seconds!”

He’d try laughing if it didn’t trigger such a massive reaction from his lungs, so he decides to just nod instead.

“See you later, Leon. Goodnight.”

He waves at her, the lethargy still reflecting in his slow and sloppy gestures, but that’s fine enough for now. Her smile is worth it, isn’t it?

 Absolutely worth trekking through the rain with full lungs and little energy left…